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English
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Published:
2025-09-02
Updated:
2025-09-02
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1,932
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1/?
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I Swear It Was Out Of Love

Summary:

Eclipse, 7 months since Sun passed away, even though he used up all his interdimensional knowledge, magic, and anything else he could think of, still failed to bring him back from the death. Sun knew truly what he was doing when he commited... Everyone was still deeply scarred, and Nexus kept spiraling more and more, realizing how they all failed Sun. His own will to go on kept fading, while also not wanting to leave his family.

Eclipse became desperate after one particular breakdown from his boyfriend, and by this point, he was willing to do anything to bring the sunny bot back. Anything...

So, when a mysterious new person shows up and hands him the solution, does he really have a choice in taking the purple crystal shard handed to him like a gift, when he feels like his love is at stake? 

Notes:

Instead of working on my other stories AGAIN this is what popped into my mind yesterday while on the train going to work. Wanted to finish it when I was done at work, but honestly I just collapsed to bed and slept till 2 pm.

And shot out to the author of "Where Do We Go From Here?", man, that story made me ugly cry several times. Snake eyes and desperation, mixed with long-going suffering and love... I hope this story won't be a disgrace in your eyes.

Who did not read that story should not start with this, cause I'm continuing that fanfic from an angsty vision I had.

Sooooo if anyone actually follows me and waits on my other stories, here is just telling you whats with them

Hangok és Társak - working on the next chapters, but due to my flashbacks and getting more things revealed from my past really made me get stuck on it, although Im already plaanning ahead, and I know how much chapter there will be by the end hehehe

Spleen - my child, that I literally have most chapters written down for and whole playlists, my AuDHD brain is just not hyperfixating on it for a loong while now, and thus I apologize to everyone for it. I'll get back to it fast when my brain says so.

And now this... Oh boy oh boy you guys will get a loooooot of angst with this. Im planning to let Sunny finally loose it. So enjoyyy UwU

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Out Of Love

Chapter Text

He couldn't stop staring at what was handed to him so easily. He didn't know what it was, what it could do, the possible dangers. All he knew was the sweet promise of solution for his problem. Eclipse was a scientist to his core. He dived into questions, took up on problems, and always wanted to find a solution. Like an obbsessed person, who keeps solving mathematical problems, because if he can't, he feels like he is dying. 

 

Although currently, Nexus was the one dying inside, while his brother, Sun, was dead.

 

How could a happy ending to all their life become so cruel and painful? 

 

By not listening, by not caring enough, by dismissing signs of clear problems as egoistical need for attention...

 

This resulted in the eldest, the heart of the family, Sun, dying by his own hands. This resulted in everyone feeling like their hearts were ripped out of their places. It resulted in Solar reliving trauma, in endless guilt, in a therapy station closing, in bottles of nutella rotting away, in isolation.

 

This event resulted in Nexus spiraling day and night, scared to loose anyone ever again, but also wanting to join Sun. A bipolar moodswinging, of wanting to live for his family and not wanting to let them go, while wanting to die because he felt like he failed Sun. His arms on his new body had to be replaced several times during these months, because he kept tearing into them during episodes of pain and flashbacks of seeing Sun dead. All the while, Eclipse kept isolating himself, trying to fix the sunny idiot back up, who - he had to admit - he missed a lot, and felt too much guilt for treating him the way he did.

 

But nothing worked. He went to dimension from dimension, trying to find someone who could fix the damaged personality and memory chip. Nothing worked.

 

He tried magic then, even though he was reluctant about it. At first he managed to bring some memories back, but the personality data was lost. Then he focused more on the personality data, and by the time he felt like he made a tiny bit of progress, the few memories he managed to snatch from the complex magic he used all got corrupted beyond use. He tried again, working on the two things at the same time, but once he moved a step ahead, his previous step corroded into nothingness, just glitched, corrupted lines of code stayed.

 

He was lost. He knew he cannot use star power, that world be dangerous. No one has to know he was also beyond scared to ever touch that power again. He has been in his lab for two weeks straight now, not going home to his boyfriends, trying to brainstorm what could he try next, when the call came.

 

Nexus was hurt. Badly. 

 

Eclipse was home within seconds, and to his horror, Nexus had tried to rip his own wires out in a fit of panick, mixed with his memory of finding Sun dead. It was always the same with those flashbacks. It always brought Nexus back to the moment he discovered his brother, making him relive the horrifying pain and shock. Even though they always tried to do their best to make Nexus realize he is not in that moment anymore, they couldn't be around him all the time to remind him, reassure him and help him. It was one of those times when they found Nexus already deep in an episode.

 

The fix up was a blur of panick and tears, but they managed. It didn't stop them from fearing what could the next accident bring. The family was all in the living room by the end of the day, emgulfing Nexus in a comforting group hug, who kept crying and sobbing, feeling like a little kid who lost their only parent. He kept crying out for Sun, begging him to come back until he finally drifted into a - hopefully - dreamless sleep.

 

And when Eclipse returned to his lab, he only wanted to return for one thing: to put the chip to a secured place, and end his attempts of reviving Sun... for now. He needed to be there for both Nexus and Solar, who had been the only one for too long trying to help Nexus stay sane and alive. He thought, maybe, he could actually tell them what he has been up to, and maybe they could find a solution together? Maybe it would help his loves too? But at that moment, he just wanted to be there for them.

 

If things would be that easy though... Someone waited for him in the lab. No visible face, just a black cloak hiding someone... or something that seemed as dark as a black hole. The mysterious thing came with a suspiciously generous gift, something to help Eclipse. 

 

It was like a divine action. A God blessing the poor genius with the solution, after seeing his hard work, but knowing he cannot get what he needs, because it's out of reach for him.

 

Yet, the figure just handed him a small crystal. Kind of like a shard. It was purple, and it felt like as if it was pulsating. As if it was alive. Eclipse's mind screamed at him how wrong this was, and once the figure dropped it into his shaky hands, this feeling just doubled.

 

Such a small thing weighting so much... like if he was holding a cleaning bot instead of a 1 cm diameter small crystal. For a moment, his mind visioned this small thing crushing the delicate chip, which was as light as a feather, and smaller than this crystal.

 

"What's this... shard?" He asked, trying to find the dark figure, that kept disappearing and reappearing like a shadow. It's voice from behind just chuckled.

 

"Ah, you have time for details." it snickered, and Eclipse felt a cold, piercing breath on his shoulder. The entity leaned closer and sinisterly whispered "But has your lover time for doubts?"

 

Eclipse froze.

 

The imagine of Nexus laying on the ground, convulsing with staticy screams of agony. Wires clenched inside his fist, ripped clean out of his head. Oily marks on his forearms, and tear strained face. Solar sobbing and screaming for help.

 

He was cornered, but the entity made it feel like a cozy, comforting, helpful trap. One he is willing to walk right into.

 

"What's the catch?" Eclipse asked in a shaky, yet determined voice. Because there has to be a catch. Everything comes with a prize as they say.

 

"It's not a catch, just a favor. No questions asked." the entity finally physically disappeared, making Eclipse gasp for air. He didn't even realize the prescene of the entity made him feel like he is being suffocated until it let him go.

 

The entity, out of thin air once more, appeared front of him. It lifted up the crystal with ease, and broke it into two equal halfes.

 

"Just put this on Sunrise's chip. It will do the charm itself, trust me. After that, the chip will be as good as it was right before his suicide." The entity gestured towards the table, where Sun's entire being layed in that small, fragile and complex machinery. Eclipse, with one half of the shard, walked up to the table, and stared down on the stabbed chip.

 

He thought through all the possibilities he could think of going wrong with this. He is literally trusting a scary ass stranger to actually help him with bringing Sun back! Yet, when he thought back to the family, to Nexus, and how Sun's absense affected them all... he gently, ever-so-carefully, put the crystal right on top of the chip.

 

"The other is for You."

 

There is always a prize...

 

"What?" Eclipse whipped his head back towards it, and suddenly, he felt like he is not in the lab, but in a dark void. Stuck with whatever this was, who raised out a black hand, with dark, long claws, and held the other half of the shard. For a moment, Eclipse got a memory of Killcode when his brain registered the claws. Those could tear him in half with one swing.

 

"I can put it right over your chip if you need help. But if you refuse, it won't work."

 

Eclipse had many questions. Heck, there were only questions in his head, running around and creating a storm within. But he can't ask, he can't get answers, he can only focus on one solution at a time. He needs Sun back, they all do! If... if having a crystal on his chip is the only way Nexus will ever heal and get better...

 

He turned around, and closed his eyes.

 

"Just get it over with..." he grumbled, and prepared for pain. Only a light sting came, and then he felt like his entire being was poured in something cold and heavy. In his shock, he opened his eyes, and got the view of the shard over Sun's chip turning to liquid, then disappearing. When the last drop turned to thin air, the chip was completely fixed.

 

Sun... was fixed.

 

Eclipse, without even thinking, picked up the chip, as carefully as he could even though his hands were shaking.

 

Sun was fixed... SUN WAS FIXED!

 

He couldn't believe it, even though he had no idea whatever shady trap he just walked into, he couldn't care less. Sun was fixed after all this time! Nexus will be okey, and Sun too, because they changed, and they will do better this time! They have to! They have to...

 

Eclipse turned around, ready to thank the stranger whatever this unknown power was within the shard, but he found himself outside their island house. Not in his lab. Sun's chip was still cradled in his hands, and he trembled like a leaf in the wind. 

 

"What the hell..?" he asked out loud, while he closed his hands as protectively around the chip as possible, pressing the makeshift shield against his chest. 

 

Just more questions appeared in his mind. This had been the strangest day of his life so far, and he already had a unique life to say the least. Let's not even mention the dawning realization of what he had just done. He agreed to a shady deal to bring Sun back, and now both he and Sun had an unknown power clinging to their core, which he had no idea what could do, and how it would affect them.

 

He is not the type to break under pressure, but he just started to realize the heavy weight of what danger he might've brought upon them. A tear escaped his eye, and he couldn't stop the next ones either. He wanted to collapse and hide away in shame. Both because he felt stupidly desperate, and because he started to cry on the open.

 

"Eclipse..?" came a deep, familiar voice from not so far away, and he whipped around in suprise. Solar was at the door, looking at Eclipse with tired eyes. He was worried, but still so full of love, and the gentle way he called his partner's name made Eclipse feel so guilty. He can't tell them what he had done completely. They can't know what deal he went into just to bring Sun back.

 

Instead of answering Solar, he walked closer, and opened his hands, revealing what held everything that made their long lost family member who he was. A fixed chip, their Sun, the one they all failed, was finally back.

Notes:

Imma vent about the original fic now

hhhhhHHHHHolllllyyyyy shit I was so glad how they portrayed Earth because genuienly that is EXACTLY how I see her sometimes. She had this pinky vision about everything, thus it made her blind to reality. Yeah here that pinky bubble of hers got broken by Sun's death because I literally cannot stand her unaware fake ass at all. I tried to write it and I was boiling with rage by my own writing so I scrapped that. Next chapters will reveal more how the family all changed since Sun was away, but let's circle back to the og fic.

I was so mad at so many moments during that fanfic because it was written soooo gooood and angst was totally awesome. I could literally feel everything Sun felt, and how unfair things were for him. I also understood the other side to some extend, but gods, if one of my siblings were doing as bad as Sun, I would NOT treat them the way the Celestials dealt with Sun.

PLUS, from experience, I have a friend, who is like a big sibling to me, who also has a fear of meat and is vegan, and she lives with us for a while now. She has trauma too, but it's also a fucking choise, and we worked out a system together that makes her feel safe, but also doesn't make the rest of the family feel guilty for eating meat. Its that fucking simple. We respect her choises, and we do our best all the damn time to make her feel safe. BECAUSE WE CARE ABOUT HER!!!! LIKE DUHHHH-

That steak house dilemma was only a dilemma because the rest of the family made one out of it. Poor Sun literally pushed aside his own deep trauma to please them. Like holy shit, if that was me, I would've told them to suck it up let me eat what I want, and would've told them its like me whole existence is a problem in their eyes. dhfhppeehue anyways my ranting is over for now byeeeeeeeeeee