Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

In an unknown location, beyond time, space and relativity, a dark and powerful being was gaining power. It had been exiled there before any universe began. But its influence had not been completely lost. Its tendrils grew in the universes it could corrupt, and soon its plan began. When it had gained enough power, it pulled its tentacles back to itself and the worlds it had hooked into to its exile place.

Once it had claimed all the worlds it wanted to, it took the most important people from each world and summoned them to a room for a “conversation”

—---------

“Welcome all to my reality. We are beyond time and space. I rule supreme. I am the being. I need no more introduction. You are all here to prove why I shouldn’t just delete your reality. I want to watch everyone here in a race of my own design, made up from all of your realities. I picked locations at random and have made a course. There will be pit stops and ways to cause chaos,” the being boomed.

“What if we refuse?” an elf from Middle-earth questioned.

“I guess it is time to discuss rewards and punishments. Should you win, your universe survives. Come last, and I will delete your universe forever. In between, I will force you to keep racing until you either survive or die. If you refuse, then I will delete your universe”

“I will race then, Gimli said

“We will not race”, the rest of the Middle-earth delegation refused.

“Then you will be deleted”, the being said before following through and deleting all except for Gimli.

“You chose to race, Gimli. For that, you get to survive. For now,” the being decreed as everyone else agreed to race.

—-------------

“Now you are all in agreement, it's time to introduce the commentators for this event”, the being ordained.

I am Luna, I commentate on the vehicle's stats and engineering

I am Will, I commentate on the tracks and the environment around them

I am Connor. I commentate on the crashes and stunts people do. The crazy, the explosive and the deadly

I am Oscar, I commentate on the creatures that are racing, the velociraptors of Jurassic Park, for example

I am Holly, I commentate on track position and race status

“Now that is sorted, everyone can go to their pit stop. Good luck,” the being laughed before everyone disappeared.

Chapter Text

”WELCOME TO THE FIRST TRACK, HORIZON AUSTRALIA”

indeed. It would appear that the Endriders, led by Far Fortune, are on pole as we arrive at the location. Everyone is locked in and preparing for the worst. There are also NPC racers based on the reality that the track is stolen from. Just to add more problems

This first leg is in a beachfront city with green spaces, roundabouts and skyscrapers. There will be lots of sharp corners, tight roads and opportunities to crash

The Endrider vehicles are very interesting. Made of scraps and hope, they are smoke-belching gas guzzlers covered in spikes and weaponry, manned by riders with no care for themselves

And they are off, a good start from all the racers as they head into the first corner. It is raining here in Horizon Australia, and we are already seeing some cars slip out

Indeed, we are, and YES. THERE IS A CRASH FURTHER BACK. An NPC got loose and slammed into another NPC, causing a pile-up of expensive cars and cheap modded cars. This race is already chaotic, and we barely even started!

Coming round the first 2 corners, the racers are coming up on the first of the Australian festivals

Yes, the Surfers Valley festival is the easiest to drive through in terms of the route, as it is on a major road. However, the city’s setup means there is a high chance of there being a lot of cars that could collide with the racers

OH, and that is bad news for the Endriders. Multiple of them just skidded out and nearly piled up, looks like we will have a new leader in sector 2

(pov Player)

This race is hell. On one side, there are teenagers on broomsticks; on the other, there are trucks and tanks and other unnatural vehicles. And they are damaging my carefully managed festival I made here in Australia. Fortunately, I know these roads. It is time to use all my practice to push hard.

—------------

As the racers leave the city streets, the 3 Mini Coopers have proven why they are the ultimate city car.

The second sector is the construction site near Surfers' Paradise. Here, uneven dirt surfaces, partially built buildings, and construction machinery are scattered around. The route also crosses the main route back over before heading down past the train and boat showcase start points

LOOK AT THAT!!!!. MULTIPLE RACERS JUST TOOK THE RAMP IN THE CONSTRUCTION SITE TO JUMP UP A LEVEL. This is some next-level racing, avoiding the traffic. Let's see how they land, though. OH YES, landing into a drift. Well done to Onetimefocus in the Hilux Arctic truck for a masterful drift on landing

These long roads are helping certain cars cover for their lack of ability on the dirt

indeed. The F1 cars are almost unstoppable on straight sectors, and now the pack is opening up on the corners as well. They are fast due to the lightness and especially designed tyre compounds and aerodynamics. But the low ride height and minimum grip tyres struggle on any non-tarmac roads. Currently, rally, off-road, and hover vehicles are the best options here

that is discounting the adaptability, grip and manoeuvrability of the animal contenders. While not as fast as the cars at times, they have not suffered once due to terrain conditions

oof. A couple of NPCs just skewered themselves on the bridge guard rails. Too much speed and a direct hit on the edge has caved the fronts in pinning them as warnings.

That wooden bridge might not hold up to all the vehicles going over it. Some of these are very heavy and speed and braking will wear them faster, especially in the wet.

(pov Verstappen)

“This is fucking shit. We are not at all prepared for off-road racing,” Max ranted over the radio.

“Acknowledged, Max, just bring it back and we will start working on a fix in the pits”, his engineer replied

—----------

and as we head into sector 3, it is the most absurd car to be on the road, the Top Gear Hammerhead Eagle I Thrust, in the lead?

It is the weirdest car here from a reality with more generic cars, I agree. It has negative aerodynamics, is made out of random stuff, has a shitty diesel generator to power the motor and the back panels are nearly dragging on the ground. I genuinely don’t understand how it can be first?

Chaos. The dirt took out the fast cars, the roads slowed the off-road cars, and a lot of others drifted or were struggling to follow the route in a vehicle with minimal turning

The Yarra Valley festival is just a decoration and side wall for this leg, where they speed along the side of it on their way to the dam. Once across the dam, they will be heading into the Australian outback, a dusty area where the drivers will need good grip to not spin out

(pov Harry Potter)

What is this madness? I keep going to turn and having to bank and losing so much speed?

—---------------------

headed into sector 4, it appears that Owen Grady and Blue are in the lead now, capitalising on the uselessness of the Hammerhead Eagle I Thrust and the traction difficulties of the other racers to get a boost

It is good to be proven correct. The velociraptor is a fast beast, and the genetic modifications made at Jurassic World only enhanced her. Blue is almost as fast as some of the cars here and has better manoeuvrability and grip on any surface

Ouch. Another NPC just drove straight into a tree and split their car entirely in half, while one just flipped multiple times and has wrecked completely

And that is bad news for the Sport Quattro of Subsonic. Took that corner too fast and spun into the river. To the back of the pack for you

And there is a new element to this race now, it is getting dark here in Australia, vehicles with lights are turning them on, and the rain is back, making this more slippery and risky.

You know you are supposed to avoid the rocks, right? These NPCs are not good at this race

OH, AND THAT IS CARS FALLING OFF THE ROCK BRIDGE. I THINK THAT IS THE FIRST NON-NPC TO LEAVE US, ONE OF THE ENDRIDERS JUST EXPLODED”

I must admit the crossover we are about to have worries me. The drivers are now about to go under that rock bridge and go in the opposite direction of travel, head-on into the racers behind them

You were right to bring that up. Oh yes. This is beautiful chaos. Cars in head-on collisions, glancing hits, OH DAMN, that car just exploded. Brilliant chaos

Those who escaped the canyon are headed to the Outback Festival

OH, the Ork Rukkatrukk just rolled over. That's a big loss of track position, but they are still going

The Outback Festival is the least friendly to non-off-road or rally cars, with a dirt track instead of covered access to the entrance and a lot of off-road events. It gets dusty here, and that means that it is not the most comfortable festival

(pov Cortana)

“Chief, you need to be more careful. This race is not designed to survive. This is also not an enemy you can shoot to save yourself”

—---------------------------

We are still going, and it appears that Ashoka Tano on her BARC speeder bike is in the lead now

Indeed. Sector 5 is the Outback Airport, where the racers will enter tunnels, drive the whole length and max out the speeds, the mine where they will be up and down across the area, and the beginning of access to the forest. This will be complex as the light fades

What is more interesting is the repulsorlift tech in the BARC speeder, it is protecting the speeder from most of the effects of terrain, without noticeably draining the power supply. This is what has propelled them past the chaos in the last sector

AND THERE IS CHAOS AGAIN! An NPC flipped in the entrance to the airport tunnel. Multiple others paused to avoid a crash, but the Speed Demon’s Demonic Junker just flattened the way through

As they enter the runway, the F1 cars have snuck back up and are opening the gap with the sheer speed they are capable of

AND ANOTHER RACER DOWN! The Ork Defkilla just flipped and exploded

The relative flatness of the mine has been a boon to the F1 cars, but many others are catching up

and now we are headed to the jungle and again the F1 cars can pull away, I think this leg is very clear cut

(pov James Bond)

Well, this doesn't seem very fair. Those cars are so fast on the long open roads, how are we to compete

—-----------------------------------------

As we head into the next sector, it is a 1,2,3 for the F1 universe, with Charles Leclerc, Max Verstappen and Kimi Raikkonen in the lead. However, being back on dirt will hurt their cars

Indeed. The long winding downhill is all dirt, and the timber mill is also dirt. I believe the timber mill is quite outdated, and yet it appears the racers may have to attempt to jump over it with the risk of landing on the roof of it

WHOA! THE OFF ROADERS HAVE JUST CUT THE ENTIRE SWITCHBACK UP AND JUMPED THE WHOLE THING WHOOO HOOOO!

As we head into the timber mill, the slower off-roaders are now in the lead with that cheeky jump

Heh, that jump is cool. Just watched an Impreza with an animal behind the wheel jump the AMG Transport Dynamics Warthog, landing on the mill roof just ahead and taking the lead

(pov Legosi)

Holy Rex. That jump was scary. I now see why Louis wanted me in the rally car. I am the toughest on our team. That landing was rough.

—----------------------
As we head into sector 7, the beastars racers have stolen the lead back from the offroaders, and they will be heading into the forest proper

Indeed. The first part is a dirt track along the edge of the lake to head up to the bridge. It is another wooden bridge that I do not trust the integrity of. Following that, it is a mix of dirt and roads as they fly through the forest headed to the suburbs near Byron Bay

I think the big boss must be respawning these NPCs as a bunch just spun into the lake and are out of this race. It feels like there should be barely any left

I was right. The bridge just splintered, and a bunch of the NPCs took a dive

This sector's been a bit boring, all these roads are relatively easy drives

OH, I WAS WRONG! THE HILUX DRIVEN BY TOP GEAR STUNTMAN IS FLYING INTO THE POOL AT THE WATERFALL, CUTTING A BUNCH OF DIRT ROADS OUT

AND ANOTHER JUMP! THE WINCHESTER BROTHERS IMPALA JUST CUT A BUNCH OF DIRT ROADS OUT

(pov Clarkson)

“I am surprised at the speed of the Sports lorry to be keeping up with the pace”, Jeremy praised over the cabin radio.

“You did cut a large sector with the other big off-roaders, and with the Impala”, Hammond retorted

“At least we were prepared for the terrain swaps”, James interjected to end the argument.

—-------------------

As we enter sector 8, the Impala is in the lead, while many others have mingled after the lots of dirt track we just had. This next sector is the long run north

Indeed. A mix of suburban streets, into some dirt tracks, followed by a minor highway to head up north to the beach

Once again, the F1 cars are climbing the ranks as are the Forza hypercars, reclaiming the loss from the dirt area

Personally, I am expecting a lot of modifications to cars for the next sector, where the cars will be modified to cope with the changes and speeds that they cannot currently cope with

This was all very interesting placement-wise, but no real chaos

And the animals are mainly midpack at the moment, so not much for me to do

(pov Furno)

Well, this is not fun. Are we even supposed to survive this?

—---------------

We are now headed into the final sector. This is the beach run. The ending of this sector determines the grid position for the next race.

Indeed. It starts by heading to the coastal zone, where our racers will have to deal with shipwrecks. From here, they will head onto the final tarmac section before heading down to Byron Bay. That long beach section will then lead to the hill climb to the Byron Bay festival, where our first reality of race terminates

In an unexpected turn of events, as we enter the final sector, it appears the speed brood are now in the lead, led by Aatchik. These insects are under my commentary as their vehicles are powered by older, venerated speed brood members who have become the engines and vehicles.

These cars are skipping across these dunes, but the road cars are struggling a lot. It appears the offroaders are getting a boost here

HELL YEAH!!!! The racers just jumped off the front of one of the wrecked boats. It looks like, leaving the shipwreck area, it will be the Orks in the lead

As the racers head back off the final road section, it appears that the Ork Rukkatrukk flipped again. This left it wide open for Greasefang and Shorikai to take the lead

Shorikai is very interesting, the first of the non-wheeled non-hover vehicular racers. a sharp-edged mech powered by the technology of Kamigawa, it has a fair amount of sentience enhanced by its pilot Kotori

That flip was epic. Too close to the upper edge of the cliff, the Rukkatruck rolled to the other edge, losing time but looking amazing

It looks like a tight race to the finish. The Byron Bay festival was the first festival here at Horizon Australia, and it is only fitting that the Horizon Australia race ends as the festival began, at Byron Bay

AND IT IS A WIN FOR KIERA HARRISON OF THE FORZA TEAM RIGHT AT THE END! Second place goes to ten of the beastars team in what was barely not a photo finish, with percy and blackjack of the olympus team in third, endriders boss, far fortune, taking fourth and Fujiwara Takumi of initial d completing the top 5.

In terms of what was driven, Kiera Harrison has a Lamborghini Centenario, Ten is in the Mitsubishi Lancer Evo with Fox decals, Far Fortune is in the Apocalypse Runner, and Fujiwara Takumi is in the Toyota Sprinter Trueno AE86

And for the non-vehicles, Perseus Jackson is riding his personal pegasus, Blackjack, an all black pegasus fiercely loyal to the demigod Poseidon

Stay tuned for the next reality we visit, where we will be racing at the Eboladrome

Chapter Text

Welcome to The Eboladrome from The Grand Tour, our second stage in this interdimensional race

This is a unique track. One of the smallest in the events, it also has a direct collision point, much like in the Outback Canyon back in Australia. The first sector is the isn't straight. So called because it isn't straight. It starts with a left-hander, and then a right-hander, both fast corners. Then it is a straight into another fast right

Starting today in first is the Forza team. This track is small and short, and that means there will be issues.

I am very excited by this

AND THEY ARE OFF
AND IN A RECKLESS MOVE ON THE SECOND CORNER, A CLOUDSPIRE SLAMMED INTO AN AMONKHET RACER AND THEY BOTH ARE TOTALLED IN A TREE!

The racers need to dodge animals along the isn't straight, as it is next to a forest

YOUR WARNING WAS TOO LATE. The Aether Rangers just lost their roverblade user

As they exit the isnt straight, the quickbeasts have the lead

This is a surprise. Caradora has an almost Psychic link with Lagorin, and they are using that to avoid the mess

Up next is Your name here corner. There is no actual advertising, but there is a chance for people to drift

And speaking of drifting, the voyager birds just drifted through the barrier and exploded OOF

Returning to the isn’t straight but in reverse, The Aston DB5 of James Bond is in the lead

This DB5 is heavily modified, with an ejector seat and multiple weapons. When the battle heats up, keep an eye on this racer

Not sorry to interrupt, the rocketeers just had a major crash on the isn’t straight. Some racers were still on their way to your name here corner, and the rocketeers just crashed into the princess Andromeda. And now the cruise ship from the Olympian universe is exploding beautifully

It was an odd one out. At least the Doctor Who universe’s Titanic has dimensional controls to shrink it for smaller circuits

And now as they head to the old lady's house, it appears Custom_Selection and the Countach he is in has taken the lead

This is the most technical part of the course with its chicane.

I don't think that house will be standing for much longer, another Endrider is gone

Heading into the substation corner, Redshift has taken the lead

Yet another cobbled together vehicle, although one of the better and more complete of the list, the boostbuggy is a fast car

Slamming into that electrical substation could easily end a drive, and this road is not very flat

Speaking of, Izoni of the Speedbrood is now fried

Final corner is up and the trio of minis are in the lead again into the field of sheep

The final corner is a 90-degree left, where if you miss the corner, you end up in quite literally a field of sheep

AND WE HAVE OUR WINNER OF THIS LEG! PERTURABO SNEAKS INTO FIRST, CHARLIE CROKER SECOND, THE ELYSIAN THIRD, KIERA FOURTH AND PICARD IN THE TREK ATV CLAIMS FIFTH. And that concludes today's ra-

NOT QUITE, A SPEED DEMON RACER JUST CRASHED INTO THE FIELD OF SHEEP AND GOT EATEN BY THE SHEEP? WHAT SORT OF SHEEP DID THE BOSS PUT ON THAT CORNER

With that, the second stage is finished after a short but eventful race

Another interesting podium. The demon infested bike made and used by Perturabo is an unnatural vehicle I feel sick for even trying to understand, the trio of Minis are an interesting group with their pedigree in rally racing, the Tauros Venator driven by the Elysian drop trooper is a 6 wheeled ATV, more suited to off road than this track, Kiera is still in the Centarino, proving that although the chaos of the race dropped the Forza team a few places, it still is good to do well and the ATV of Picard from Star Trek’s universe is a weird one as well but I guess the F1 cars couldn't break out the pack and had to drive careful not to take race ending damage

Join us next time when we race through Ixalan