Archive of Our Own ^beta

i.
Okay, so it's probably Remus's fault. 

Maybe. Just a little bit. 

Not much, and  definitely  not intentionally.

It starts on a rather dull evening in Grimmauld Place, and although most evenings are dull, this one is even worse, because they're waiting for Snape to come and give Remus his second dose of Wolfsbane. It's a one time thing, as Snape likes to remind him often and thoroughly, because Remus would be with the packs by the next full moon and Wolfsbane would be... well,  an absolute no-go.

Sirius is sulking. 

He has been, since they came to Grimmauld, and last night, Harry had apparently been attacked by dementors. Remus had blinked for several seconds when he heard. Sirius had glared at Dumbledore, and two windows glasses had spontaneously cracked and broke.

Harry’s distressed letter hasn't helped.

Because now, Sirius really wants to go and get him out,  (he's  only my fucking godson!! who just about got his soul sucked out!!)  and s o, Sirius is well and truly moping.

Remus is certain he'll continue the whole time they're here.

At any rate, it sort of slips out.

"Your hair look like Snape's," Remus remarks, idly, before he even realises what he's said, before he can watch Sirius register the words.

Sirius looks horrified. Offended. A little bit terrified.

As he should be,  James's waspish voice says, in Remus's head.  Padfoot is supposed to be handsome and sexy and beautiful and happy and have bright eyes. And he usually smells good. And his jaw-

On second thought, that might be Remus's own voice.

"What did you," Sirius asks, slowly and Remus can atleast pat himself on the back for the sudden fire in Sirius's previously dead eyes, "just say?"

"Er," Remus clears his throat, looks away. 

"No, honestly," Sirius insists, expression turning desperate. "What the actual fuck did you just say?"

"Oh, you know," Remus tries playing it off as nothing, while also inching away from Sirius, who's looking suspiciously twitchy, like he's about to jump Remus. "Just. Your hair. Little- um. They're a little- "

Don't say it, Lupin. Sirius will kill you and then he'll feel guilty and depressed about it and THEN he'll look even more like Snape.

" -greasy," Remus blurts out, before jumping to his feet with a terribly cheery smile, turning his wrist over to check the time on a watch that he doesn't own. "And oh look at the time, I should really be off- "

The kitchen door swings open behind Sirius.

"Lupin," Snape announces, quite dramatically, his robes billowing behind him.  Fucking vampire creep.  "Your...potion."

"Yes," Remus is sort of glad about the interruption, if only because Sirius looks two seconds away from losing his mind. "Yes, thank you. Thanks a lot, Sev- "

Sirius makes a growling noise in his throat, eyes intent on Snape's hair.

Snape scoffs at him. Remus laughs, nervously.

"That's it, I'll just take this," Remus grabs the smoking vial from Snape's hands, "thank you, Severus, you can uh- "

Remus jerks his head towards the door.

Snape glances between them, and  of course, he can't just leave.

"Enjoying your little vacation, Black?" Snape asks, with an impressive sneer. 

"What's that supposed to mean?" Sirius snarls back, glaring. 

"Oh, just... it must be relaxing," Snape smiles, nastily, "to be so very useless to the Order."

Sirius clenches his fists, his teeth grit so tight that Remus is sure he'll hear a crack.

"I know how you like to feel... involved,"  Snape says, lip curling. "With important matters. Must be difficult, though, doing so while you're hiding in your mother's house like a coward."

"You fucking- " Sirius curses, his wand in his hands, which is what makes Remus snap into action.

Ten minutes later, Snape walks out of the house, his robes only slightly singed, and Sirius storms upstairs to Buckbeak.

And that's the end of the stupid hair thing,  Remus thinks, as Sirius's mother starts screaming. 

(It's not.)





ii.
Sirius doesn't come out of Buckbeak's room for atleast five hours. Remus doesn't know if he should go or not, because he'll probably just make things worse. 

He's sitting on the kitchen table, when Sirius comes back.

He barges in through the door and slaps down something on Remus's crossword. 

A pair of scissors.  It's plastic and yellow, and Remus stares at it, blinks up at Sirius.

"Cut them. My hair," Sirius jerks his head, his hair flicking in front of his face. "Cut 'em all off."

"Uhm," Remus says.





iii.
Remus gingerly puts down the scissors.

Sirius runs a hand through his hair, short and barely an inch long. He looks abruptly young, like Sirius of fourth year used to look, before he started living with the Potters. His cheekbones are even more pronounced, his jaw harder and sharper, and Remus is already starting to regret all of this.

"Better," Sirius spits out, scanning his reflection in the mirror. "I need a change of clothes, too, Lupin. I'm giving you money, you know my size."

"...erm. Sirius, I don't think- "

"Just do it. I'm not wearing black anymore," Sirius snaps. "I want robes which Snape would never even fucking touch. Get yellow, get red and gold, get pink, for all I care. Hell, get muggle clothes. Just get something."

"Sirius," Remus tries being firm, although he knows enough of Sirius to know that at this point, he's unstoppable. "I do need to go for Dumbledore's work, and tomorrow to get Harry and I can't exactly wander down to- "

"I'm giving you  three  hours," Sirius states, rather presumptuously. "If I don't have new clothes by then, I swear to merlin I'll roam around naked."

Remus wouldn't really mind that. Not that Sirius has a clue.

"Harry’s going to be here in a day. Remember that."

Oh wow, he is STILL such a fucking bitch.

"Fine," Remus grits out. "Pink and gold it is, then."





iv.
Harry doesn't know what kind of welcome he had expected, but this wasn't it.

"Are those... unicorns?"  he blinks at the white shirt Sirius is wearing, which does indeed, have pink and purple unicorns printed all over it. 

Sirius's hair is short, he's wearing pants and flip-flops. And a unicorn shirt. 

Harry wonders what the hell is going on with him.

"Oh, yes," Sirius nods, grinning and taking Harry’s trunk. "Moony thinks he's funny. Anyhow, do you like lemonade?"

"Er," Harry laughs, nervously, and nods. "Sure, I guess?"

"Great!" Sirius claps his hands together, raising his voice. "Kreacher, one more lemonade!"

There's a weird noise, from what Harry guesses, must be the kitchen.

"I want lemonade, too,"  Dedalus Diggle says, glancing curiously at Sirius's clothes.

"Make your own, then," Sirius puts an arm around Harry’s shoulders, pulling him along into the living room. "That offer's only for my godson. Order people are unwelcome here."

"This is literally Order headquarters," Emmeline Vance says, sighing as she sits down.

"I said what I said," Sirius sniffs, and Harry can't help but laugh.