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English
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Part 4 of Two and a half Mystery Twins
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Published:
2024-03-14
Updated:
2024-03-16
Words:
1,371
Chapters:
2/?
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21
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114
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Glitch Screen

Summary:

Soos makes a promise to his grandma that he can find a girlfriend in one week, and buys a dating simulator game to help him learn how to talk to women.

Stan makes a promise to himself and his long lost brother that he can protect the children from the dangers of this town, and sends the kids out of the house so he can go through their rooms undisturbed.

Notes:

I didn't wanna tag it, since the main fandom is Gravity Falls and it's more or less a reference and has absolutely no connection to any of the dsaf games (which means no murdering)... I just took the characters of Dave and Jack and shoved them into this work, because 1) it fits into the theme and 2) I love them <3

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1

Chapter Text

So, here’s the plan:

Stan needs the kids out of the house. Not only so he can demon-proof it in peace and without any distractions (knowing Mabel she’d probably mix glitter into his salt and hang carefully crafted and eye grating signs around the Mystery Shack for any potential demons to “Keep out”). And once he’s done and hidden all the evidence of his real intentions to open the Shack back to the public, he’ll need to comb through the kid’s bedroom and confiscate anything related to the paranormal and Dipper’s doomed pursuit of The Author.

And somehow this is the one thing he’s scared more of than anything. He can deal with the confrontation that will soon follow when he’ll finally force Dipper to give away the journal. He’s not scared to apply (adjusted) force. He’s not scared of the fighting and yelling and insults that will obviously follow. He’s not scared to deal with the icy glares and cold shoulders and condemn. He’s not even scared of what he will find in Dipper’s room. To find out how much he, as a caretaker, has failed the children. To realize how deep this wretched town has infested the kid’s mind with its secrets and dangers. How far the hooks have sunk into their flesh to drag them away into the woods, away from their family, from Stan.

No, no… Ironically, he’s scared of the one thing that would seem the easiest part to anyone else. Wait for the kids to leave and then search through their stuff. He’s sure at lot of parents do that routinely. Mothers reading through their teenage daughter’s diary, fathers looking for any hidden drugs underneath the mattress. Stuff like that.

And he knows, he knows what he is doing is the right thing. He’s not being invasive, he’s not being a creep (because he too has been a teenage boy at one point and he knows what kinda stuff youngsters get interested in at this age), he’s doing this to protect them. From the town, from the monsters, from the downfall they’ll meet at the hands of their own pursuit.

From themselves.

And one day they’ll thank him for that. One day, when they’re grown-ups and have their own children and know a little bit more about life they’ll sit down next to him and say “Thank you for protecting me. I didn’t see it back then, but now I’m glad you did what you’ve done.”

Sweet Moses, he sounds just like his father.

And that’s what scares him the most of all.

Because he doesn’t want to be anything like his father at all. As much as he’s grown up to see things from Filbrick’s perspective and understand some of the things he’s done as a parent (even if Stan hated him for it as a child, but what child doesn’t hate their parents for disciplining them?) he will never forgive his father for kicking him out. He won’t forgive the unnecessary insults that brought him nothing but shame, the hits, and kicks and-

He needs to stop thinking about this, Stan tells himself. This isn’t the time to be stuck in the past, it’ll just distract him from what’s important.

So, how to get the kids out of the house but away from anything related to the supernatural?

The answer comes from the most unexpected of places:

Soos is looking for a girlfriend.

Chapter 2

Notes:

We'll take a break from Stan's point of view for the next chapters.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Oh, what a wonderful day.

Well, every day is wonderful of course, but today is especially wonderful! The sun shines, the weather is warm and there’s love waiting to be found! If you asked Mabel, it couldn’t get any better!

It’s been only a few days since the Sock Opera fiasco and things have been slowly coming back to normal… or as normal as it gets considering everything. Not only that, but Dippy-Dop seems to be back on his feet. His not-so-cute vampire eyebags have faded and after a medical check-up from Grunkle Stan and Doctor’s Assistant Waddles, her brother was finally allowed to take off that stupid makeshift cast.

Until then she had spent most of her days up in their shared bedroom, spending her time with drawing and crafting and knitting more sweaters than she could count, all while making sure Dipper was actually staying in bed and resting. It’s not like there was much else to do since the Shack has been closed and Grunkle Stan decided to “renovate” the gift shop.

A small part of Mabel thinks this isn’t just about introducing new and whacky cryptids to the waves of tourist that come in and out every day for Grunkle Stan to scam them out of their money. There is something coming, something big that will change their summer vacation forever. And part of her wants to let Dipper in on it, warn him that it’s only a matter of time before Grunkle Stan will ask about the journal.

But another, the bigger and stronger part of her doesn’t want to deal with the consequences. She just wants to enjoy this calm as long as it will last. And there’s no need to freak out her brother more than he already is, after getting ditched by her and then possessed Bill Cipher of all things.

She hopes she’s not being selfish this time. Sure, Dipper is going to be devastated, but it’s for his- their own good, right? And it’s not like he knows that she knows about it. He’s not going to blame her for this one, right?

Grunkle Stan knows what he’s doing, and Mabel trust him. There is no need to worry about this now.

 

So, to the matter at hand- LOVE.

That’s her favorite word. Right after kitten and buttercream filled waffles with rainbow sprinkles (well, that’s a bit more than just one word, but who’s counting).

And if she’s unable to find the love of her life during this summer vacation, then heck it, she going to help Soos find it instead! She could scream from excitement! Because if anyone deserves a girlfriend, then it's the best and most wonderful handyman in existence.

Grunkle Stan seems more than overjoyed to send them off on their way, practically shoving Dipper out of the doorway to “have some fun for once”, which doesn’t go unnoticed by her brother, but is quickly disregarded to Stan being his grumpy self and not wanting to deal with them interfering with his “artistic vision for the new gift shop”.

 

“Guys, I know just the place we have to go!” Mabel tells Dipper and Soos when they finally sit down in his pick-up truck to find the perfect candidate. “It’s where romance lives and fashion styles go to die.”

“Yeah, man. You’ve been helping us so much this summer, it’s time for us to do something nice for you too,” her brother agrees.

Soos just scratches his chin in thought while looking at them from the rearview mirror. “Hm… I don’t know dudes. You really think, there's a girl out there that’s gonna be attracted to… well. All of this?” he asks while gesturing to himself in general.

“Duh, of course! Who wouldn’t want to date a guy with a steady job and technical skills?” Mabel boops him on his shoulder and flashed him an encouraging smile.

“You guys think Wendy would wanna join us? I haven’t- I mean, she hasn’t been to work the last few days- well, it’d be nice to spend some time together, right?”

Mabel can’t help her cheeky grin, as she pokes into Dipper’s side, who in turn tries to swat her hand away. “Aww, did you miss Wendy? Is this gonna be your quest to finding love as well?”

“Psh! Of course, not! Don’t be silly Mabel-!”

“Silly is my middle name-!”

“No, it’s not! And anyway, she made it very clear she’s not into me and I am absolutely and positively over her, yes!”

So, while the Mystery Twins bicker in the backseat, Soos pulls out his phone and decides to call the red head. Truth be told, he hasn’t heard from her in a while either, ever since… the talk with Mister Pines, but it couldn’t hurt to check, right?

Notes:

Welp, gotta learn for my nurse-medical exams now... And oh boy let me tell ya, it's a lot!
So, I'll stick to more, shorter chapters for the time being so there's at least some updates.
Cheers!

Notes:

Y'all remember when this Episode first came out? Like the same year as Five Night's a Freddys? Man, those were times. There were theories that it was somehow planned or that one copied from the other. Safe to say those were the first two fandom I was ever really part of.
There's this quote I read once "Adulthood is just enjoying the same things you did as a twelve-year-old, but not feeling ashamed about it this time." and I think that fits very well :3

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