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Summary
Pity is a funny thing. It makes folks sign cards for acquaintances they hardly know, it convinces people to buy apology jewelry better than any salesman could, it beckons suckers to arrange bouquets of flowers that will inevitably die a week later.
In some cases, it can persuade a scientist to repopulate a nearly extinct population by copulating with its last living member.
Stanford Pines is undoubtedly that scientist.