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Published:
2019-12-31
Completed:
2020-04-16
Words:
5,659
Chapters:
2/2
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The Great Lab Coat Fiasco

Summary:

In which Chrome learns three things:

One, no one should ever touch Senkuu’s lab coat. He wore it everywhere and wouldn’t hear otherwise from anyone else.

Two, apparently some idiot disregarded the first thing. It would’ve been fine, but Senkuu was sulking everywhere, and it was kind of sad.

And three, no matter how much you want your friend to feel better, you should probably avoid punching the perpetrator until after you get an introduction.

(Or, A romantic, cracky comedy of frankly ridiculous proportions in which Chrome just tries to be a good friend. Too bad he fails so spectacularly).

Notes:

I spent way too long on this

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Chapter One

Chapter Text

Senkuu always wore his lab coat. 

    Always.

    Out to dinner, at the movie theater, through day and night, in rain and snow - Senkuu always wore that lab coat. Every day. Every hour, hell, even in the photos Chrome had seen of the little, ten-year-old version of him, he was still wearing the damn thing. It was crazy.

In fact...Chrome was in the firm belief that Senkuu hadn’t gone a day without it - he wore it that often. Half of him was tempted to call up Taiju or Yuzuriha and make sure he was correct, just for...curiosity's sake. They had known him longer, so, surely, they would be able to clarify that he was completely right in regarding this question.  A question he just wanted to be answered for curiosity's sake, mind you, having nothing to do with the bet he and Kohaku totally didn’t have. Nope, definitely not. 

(Ha, he was going to win, screw you Kohaku). 

And Senkuu really did wear it everywhere. Chrome wasn’t sure if he or Kohaku or any of Senkuu’s new college friends had even seen the man without his signature coat. It was just...part of Senkuu being Senkuu, at this point. One of those ticks, like how Chrome would pull out his worry stone and rub it between his palms, or how Kohaku only wore skirts, even in the dead of winter. Which was ridiculous, by the way, Chrome wasn’t sure how she didn’t freeze her ass off. 

    “Because I’m not a wimp like you,” she would say, and Chrome would say something rude, Kohaku would tackle him to the ground, and Senkuu, not even looking up from his this-is-bigger-than-my-IQ book, would tell them to be mindful of the vase to their right. 

    Ah, good times. He still had the bruises to remember them by - Kohaku hits hard. 

    However, even in times like those when it’s just the three of them chilling around his dorm, Senkuu still never took off the coat. Chrome used to wonder about it, used to poke and nag, but now...Well, let’s just say Senkuu is as stubborn as a mule. There’s hardly any use arguing with him about something he’s set his mind to unless you have good, solid reasoning to combat against it.  

    Problem was, Senkuu was scarily smart, and he always had a rebuttal for everything . 

    So Chrome kinda just...forgot about it.  He just assumed that that was the end of it, because he had seen Senkuu spitting mad before, and it wasn’t something he wanted to see ever again. Who in their right mind would? In the long run, it just didn’t matter . 

That was, of course, until the later dubbed Holy Shit Chrome You’re An Idiot Incident or the HSCYAI ordeal for short. That was what Kohaku liked to call it, at least. Chrome swore up and down it was just a small misunderstanding. Hardly even anything of note. 

It had started as a normal day. 

Chrome had just been lazing around his dorm, procrastinating his homework, and drinking a lot of apple juice for some reason (don’t ask him why - he was craving it, okay?) when he heard a knock on his door.  

However...calling it a ‘knock’ might be putting it generously. It was far too loud for that, and Chrome could see his poor door frame shaking from his spot on the couch. He also heard the sounds of cursing, muffled by the wood, as well as a louder shout of “CHROME, OPEN THE GODDAMN DOOR!” accompanied by another bang. Looking up from where he was playing a Jenga match against himself (he was really bored but didn’t want to sleep ) , he decided to comply with the mysterious voice’s demands. Anything was better than sitting here, bored out of his mind, for longer. If it was a murderer, at least that would be something interesting. 

“Coming, coming,” he said to the door. The ‘knocking’ didn’t cease. 

Eventually, he ambled his way over. Standing in front of the door, holding his cup of apple juice and still in Hello Kitty pajama pants, Chrome briefly wondered if this was such a smart idea. Anyone could be behind it. Anything could happen. 

Another loud bang rattled the frame. 

Eh. His impulse control had gone on strike, because of his five-hour-a-day sleep schedule, as of late. It would be fine. 

Probably. 

Chrome opened the door and promptly cursed loudly, as he was nearly met with a book to the face. He stumbled backward, his juice sloshing over the side, and eyes wide. “My AJ, man,” he complained, clutching his chest. Opening his mouth to say more, his words died on his tongue at the sight that met his eyes. 

“...Senkuu?” 

Knuckles white against the heavy textbook and face expressionless - maybe someone who didn’t know the scientist well would assume everything was fine. Chrome knew better though. If the blank face and tense muscles weren’t telling enough, there was another crucial detail signifying something was wrong. And he wasn’t talking about the fact that apparently, Senkuu had been smacking his book against his door, though that was more than a little concerning. 

“Senkuu…” Chrome’s mind raced with dozens of questions. The most prominent thing going through his mind, however, was simply this -

 Where. The hell. Was Senkuu’s lab coat. 

Ohhhh shit. Maybe he shouldn’t have opened the door, after all. The last time Chrome had seen Senku this mad was when he got in an argument with that flat-earther boy, and he still had nightmares about the ensuing verbal thrashing. 

Chrome, in his friendship with Senkuu, had started to follow a few general rules to go off of, to avoid Senkuu’s wrath. One - you do not mess with him or his friends. Two - you do not mess with science. And, as Chrome stared down Senkuu, wearing a wrinkled black flannel and an expression so cold it could freeze hell over,  he mentally added a third rule. Three - you do not mess with the Lab Coat. 

Because whoever made Senkuu this pissed was going to have hell to pay. 

“Uhhh…Senkuu, my dude! My friend who totally won’t kill me, uh; whatever brings you here to my humble abode?” 

“My, I wonder,” he said dryly, lowering his book and stepping inside Chrome’s dorm. “And you said my name no less than three times, in case you didn’t notice.” 

Chrome laughed awkwardly. “My bad, my bad.” Uh oh. No jokes, then. 

“It’s fine,” Senkuu sighed deeply, casting him an apologetic look. Chrome felt some of his unease fade. “You should clean up your juice before it stains.” Senkuu flopped on the couch. 

“Oh, yeah.” Chrome said aloud. He stared at the stain on his carpet for a solid thirty seconds, before giving up and plopping down next to Senkuu. That was a problem for future him, right now he just wanted to figure out what the hell was happening with one of his closest friends. “Sooo, my dude...are you going to tell me what’s up?”

“I thought it was obvious,” Senkuu grumbled, arms crossed. Chrome started at him for a couple of seconds in bewilderment. Was Senkuu… sulking?

“Well, yeah, but I mean I don’t really know the circumstances,” Chrome said carefully. “So do you wanna, you know, talk about?” Senkuu slumped down further, eyes averted. Holy crap, he was sulking. Senkuu, the smartest kid in their class, mega-genius was sulking. 

Huh. Well, you see new things every day, don’t you? Just wait till he told Kohaku. 

S\enkuu sighed, then sighed again, sinking into the couch. “It was just  - ugh. I don’t even want to talk about it. I just can’t believe it. How could he do this to me, that freaking thief. I never saw it coming, though maybe I should’ve. He was acting suspiciously. ”

“A thief?” Chrome echoed. The late hour made images of ninjas and assassins dance in his head. He blinked and shook his head. “That’s horrible, you said they just...took it? Why? I mean it’s just a lab coat; it can’t be super valuable.”

“Right?! I have no idea what he was thinking!” Senkuu threw his hands in the air. “And now I can’t find him anywhere. Dropped off the grid.”

Chrome hummed thoughtfully.  

It was silent for a few seconds as Senkuu tried to gather himself. Eventually, he took a deep breath and, when he opened his eyes, they were full of steel. “I’ll hunt him down soon enough,” he said simply. 

Chrome felt an overwhelming pity for whoever took Senkuu’s lab coat then, as even seeing that steely determination reminded him why he didn’t want to be on Senkuu’s bad side.“Yeah,” Chrome said, semi-nervously. “No doubt from over here, man. Good luck.”  

“Thanks.” he grinned darkly.

After an awkward silence, where Senkuu looked like he was plotting a homicide, Chrome coughed loudly. “So, uh, video games?” 

“Don’t you have homework?” 

Chrome groaned. “I’ll do it later - ”  

“Do it now.” 

“Ugh,” Chrome sighed. “You’re no fun.” 

“I’ll be sure to remember that when you ask for help on your next science exam.” 

“Buzzkill.” 

Senku smiled fondly, looking a little better. “Dumbass.” 

Soon, the sounds of pencil scratching on paper filled the air as he worked, and Senkuu pulled out his book and quietly began to read. Staring at his notes, trying to review, Chrome found his mind wandering - which wasn’t that unusual in and of itself. However, the direction his thoughts were going… 

“Hey, Senkuu?”

“Mhm?” 

“If I see this thief guy,” Chrome said, “I’ll have your back, yeah? I’ll, like, punch him or something.” 

Senkuu laughed and laughed a little more. He reached over and patted his shoulder. “Sounds good, Chrome,” he smiled, something mischievous in his eyes. “Sounds good.” 

Chrome beamed. 

He hoped they found the guy soon. 

 

However, that turned out to be the last thing Chrome heard about the coat drama for a whole week. After Senkuu left, fire still burning mutely in his eyes, promising to update him if he found the guy, Chrome slowly lost himself in the constant flow of work and school. Professors liked to do this funny thing where they forget their students have lives outside of college and assign a lot of shit right at the same time. Kohaku liked to describe it with a whole lot of cuss words, and Senkuu just called it a ‘challenge’ and moved on. Chrome thought his description was the most accurate, however. He just called it hell on Earth, downed his coffee, and tried not to pass out from exhaustion. 

Fun times. Fun, fun times. 

And one of these work spirals just happened to fall right on this week. Yay. Honestly, though, Chrome felt like he was slowly losing his mind, staring and staring at notes. Like, why were there so many? Why were they so complicated? And, God, he had barely started on his research paper - 

A knock. Someone was knocking on the door.

Chrome blinked blearily and looked up from his papers. Ugh. Whoever was there better have come bearing coffee or there would be hell to pay. Heaving himself up from his chair, Chrome tottered like a baby elephant towards the door. Crashing into three walls, he yawned loudly. What time was it? Eh, he's sure whoever this is will tell him. 

    Opening the door, he squinted at the sudden onslaught of light. Huh, so it was morning. Good to know. 

“Chrome,” Senkuu’s voice sounded way too chipper for such a hellish week. Seriously, how does he do that? “Chrome. Chrome, look.” 

Still squinting, he looked around. “A’ what?” 

“My shirt, idiot, look - look at my shir - hey, what’re you doing?” 

Chrome, who’s eyes had zeroed in on the coffee in Senkuu’s hands, had grabbed it and was already drinking greedily. “Coffee first,” he murmured. “Gossip second.” 

Senkuu huffed but followed Chrome into his dorm nonetheless, closing the door behind him. He studied the dark room, the drawn curtains, and takeout containers left haphazardly around. “Chrome,” he said. “You’re a mess. If you need help, you know I’m here for you, right?” 

“‘S fine. Just studying.” 

“You’ve studied enough, I think,” Senkuu said, his voice softer. “You always ace the tests, idiot. Now, let some light in, take a break. This isn’t - “ 

 “Healthy, yeah, yeah. I get it,” Chrome grumbled but sent Senkuu a grateful smile nonetheless. 

After a few minutes of him sipping his coffee in silence, finally feeling more awake, he spoke up. “So, what’s going on with your shirt?” 

Senkuu grinned, and ah, yeah, that’s the evil smile. Shouldn’t have asked, shouldn’t have asked - 

“Well, first just guess whose shirt this is,” he said, gesturing to his torso. Chrome studied it, confused. It looked like a normal turtleneck sweater, a bit small on Senkuu, and a dark blue color. 

‘Uh, yours?” 

“Wrong!” Senkuu smirked slyly. “It’s that damned mentalist’s.” 

“Damned what now?” 

“Mentalist,” Senku said, confused. “You know, the one who stole my coat. My bo - ” 

“Oh, the thief guy! So does that mean you got your lab coat back or what?”

Senkuu’s smile faded. “No, actually. The idiot hid it somewhere, and I can’t find it for the life of me. I figured stealing something of his,” he gestured to the sweater, “would help even the battlefield, somewhat” 

“Yeah, for sure. Plus, this way I can help by being your backup.” He mimed punching someone in the face.   

Senkuu snorted. “Whatever you say Chrome. All that matters is soon I’ll get it back, and we can forget all this.” 

“That’s the spirit!” Chrome grinned with as much enthusiasm as his sleep-addled brain could muster. Soon, this would just be another funny story between the three of them; soon, Senkuu would get his lab coat back and stop sulking everywhere. 

And soon, the problem would be solved once and for all.