Chapter Text
Tony Stark was jealous.
Of a man named Walt.
"Walt," he muttered to himself, using a wrench to adjust the bolts on a strange machine. He hadn't decided what it was yet. It was either going to be a coffee maker or a terminator. But it definitely had hands. You needed hands to fulfill either of those functions with enough artistry. "Walt. Seriously? What does she see in him? I'm Tony Stark! Fucking Walt..."
Tony paused and looked around his workshop for inspiration, and found only polished cars and resentment. Fucking Walt.
He was thinking about naming his creation The Caffeinator, but based on how his other robotic assistants had turned out, he would probably just end up calling it Ick.
That, too, would cover both of its possible functions, or at least the products that resulted.
Walt Anderson was rich and gentlemanly and aware, the kind of man who remembered which fruits a girl was allergic to. Apparently he owned some companies that sold heaters. Tony and Pepper had met him at a charity event, and he had made a little flirtatious banter with Pepper, but nothing sinister. Tony hadn't felt threatened, beyond making a few rude remarks to the man that had made Pepper gasp in horror.
Tony had soothed her ruffled feathers, convinced her to dance with him, and then they had gone home and had wonderful sex. Everything was fine.
Pepper and Walt had become friends, organized a few events together. Walt had eased up on the flirting, taking the hint after Tony had programmed Jarvis to address Walt as "Mr. Anderson," in a slightly chilling voice.
He hadn't started to worry until Pepper came home one day, fuming. He had prepared for the worst, or what he thought was the worst until he heard her tirade about the failings and character flaws of one Walt Anderson.
Tony had listened, full of dread, as she expounded on her rage and described Tony in glowing terms as a comparison. She used words like "sweet" and "thoughtful," and other adjectives that had never and should never be used to describe the self-centered billionaire.
He was supposed to be the only one who got her riled up like this.
Finished with the bolts, Tony started pacing. "Thoughtful. Thoughtful. I'm not thoughtful, I'm Tony Stark." He threw the wrench against the glass door, and it bounced harmlessly off the reinforced material and landed on the floor at his feet.
After that night, it had all been downhill. Nowadays she tried to act happy with him all the time, even when she would normally be worried or angry. She would get distracted and zone out in the middle of conversations with him, which was weird, because that was his job. The sex was... well, he still enjoyed the sex, but he thought it was getting pretty one-sided, and that was downright depressing.
Tony sat down in front of the robot he was building, looking it over, trying to figure it out. He was a genius, but he wasn't smart enough for this.
.:.
That evening, he and Pepper were getting ready for an outing. He wasn't sure if was an event date or a real date, but Pepper was sure to know. Either way, it involved a suit and tie, and a very sexy dress that kept pulling his eyes down to the base or Pepper's spine and making him think about things he shouldn't, well, he should, but...
Pepper hadn't spoken to Walt in over a week. She was miserable. Even he could tell.
Tony's mouth had a bitter taste in it that he mostly blamed on science. Jarvis had insisted after some brainstorming that he go in the coffee-making direction, and Ick was making Very Unique coffee by the end of the day. Tony would have to convince Walt to try some.
Pepper went to adjust Tony's tie, and it reminded him so much of another moment, so he reminded her. "You know, if I were Iron man I'd have this girlfriend who knew my true identity."
Pepper smiled warmly and rolled her eyes.
"She'd be a wreck, ‘cause she'd always be worried that I was going to die, yet, proud, of the man I'd become. She'd be wildly conflicted, crazy about me... but, in love with someone else."
Pepper, who had been listening in amusement, suddenly put a hand to her mouth, eyes wide. "Tony," she said, in a broken voice.
And he gave her a look. A look that said, I know. It's okay. Go to him. Nothing has changed between us, not really.
Tony Stark was rather impressed at what a tremendous load of bullshit he managed to convey in just one look.
She kissed him, and the kiss screamed, "Goodbye," and he did his best not to scream back.
And then it was over.
Tony started spending a lot of time in his workshop.
Pepper figured out two days after her engagement to Walt that despite his act, Tony was not okay, at which point he started ignoring her calls. He felt bad for what it was probably doing to her, but he felt worse for himself.
.:.
The latest suit was coming along nicely. He was bouncing back and forth about the idea of a plate to cover up the glowing thing in his chest, because it was pretty serious vulnerability issue he had yet to really address. The coffee that Ick made was starting to taste pretty okay, which was odd, because he hadn't made any adjustments to the robot since that first day.
There was some arbitrary amount of time that was Too Much to spend moping in his workshop, but he had a strong impression that he paid someone else to know what it was.
.:.
Loki sat alone in a cell in the dungeons of Asgard, stared at the occupants of the cell on the opposite wall and thought, This would all be so much easier if I acquired a badger.
Thor had come and talked to him. He’d spoken a great deal about that mortal woman he had met when Odin cast him into Midgard. She was helping to rebuild the Bifrost, and it would be done within the year. They were going to get married. Loki wondered if Thor realized how short the human lifespan was.
Loki had listened, but had not graced his adoptive brother with any replies. Thor gave up and left, and Loki had been alone again for a length of months.
Now a plan was forming in his mind. But he did not have his tools, nor the ear of anyone important to whisper cunning lies into, unless Thor came back. And the spell in this prison prevented using magic, unless one had the right materials.
When the guards came to bring him food, he always insisted that he must speak to his father, and they never listened. It really wasn't fair.
So now he was slowly gathering the ingredients he needed to do a spell in this place, and make his escape.
The prisoner in the cell across from him had a pet badger that had burrowed in from the wall and befriended the prisoner in exchange for part of the meager meals the guards brought.
One ingredient was missing from Loki's collection, and a claw from the creature's left hind foot would suffice. He could ask for it, but he didn't think the prisoner would take kindly to the idea of Loki hurting his best friend. He also didn't think the badger would take kindly to the attempt.
Loki had tried enticing it by holding out his own food, to no avail and dirty looks from his fellow inmate. He was stuck. It was the badger that had first reminded Loki that the spell he intended to do existed, and now it was the badger that stood between him and performing it.
Loki frowned down at his water cup. He couldn't do magic per se, but...
Not particularly wanting to know the answer to this question, Loki dipped a finger in the water and concentrated. Ice crystals formed in the water. The powers that came of Loki’s so-called nature apparently did not fall under the umbrella of magic, and were not forbidden here.
Loki looked up to address the other prisoner. "What is your name, sir?"
"Hrolf."
"Hrolf, your badger friend looks ill."
Hrolf ignored him, as Loki had suspected he would.
Loki lay his hand down in the ground, and slowly, ever so slowly, caused frost to grow along the stone floor.
When the frost had reached the opposite cell, Loki spoke a little more poison. "Animals can become sick, just as humans can. I've spent time with humans, I recognize the signs of a fever. You've heard of fevers, right? Shaking chills and glassy or over-bright eyes? I have medicine." Loki gestured to pile of herbs and oddments he had been gathering in preparation for his spell.
The prisoner looked doubtfully at his badger, but the animal had no symptoms, so he said, "You're lying."
"You'd best decide soon. Left untreated, these things can kill." And Loki pushed the frost just far enough to chill the furry creature.
The cold set in, and the badger started shaking and curling close to his master for warmth. The man looked doubtfully down at the creature, and then even more doubtfully up at Loki. "You'll cure him and then you'll send him back to me."
Loki nodded.
Hrolf pushed the badger through the bars in the god's direction. "Go on," he urged the creature. The badger slowly made its way into Loki's cell. Loki sighed in relief.
A guard walked past on his round and slipped dramatically on the ice, landing hard. "Ouch! Dammit, I was planning to go dragon hunting later today."
Staring at the ice, Hrolf suddenly figured out the game. "Hey! Return my badger to me, you fiend!"
Ignoring them both, Loki picked up his find and looked it over. The badger looked back at him a little shakily, eyes over-bright from the cold as Loki had predicted. The thing was... cute.
Well, no one had ever written that the claw had to be detached from the badger.
.:.
Tony had no clear perception of what day it was, and only an educated guess about what month it was. He had perfected the suit in every way he could think of, designed the chest covering in and out ten times, and eventually opted to leave it out and keep the glowing look because anything else looked tacky by comparison. He was out of inspiration.
So he took out his phone, thinking maybe he could obsess over old pictures like unstable ex-boyfriends were supposed to do, and found out that the last few calls he had missed were actually from SHIELD.
Right. Superhero. Really had to get on that.
It probably wasn't anything too urgent, or they would have broken down the doors. But then, they were made of reinforced glass. No, Jarvis would have told him. He had been ignoring the AI more than usual lately, but Jarvis knew how to be stubborn, if it was important.
Meeting scheduled for ten minutes ago. He could leave now, and still be more punctual than usual.
Tony arrived in style in the latest, most impressive and shiny version of his suit, then took it off and watched everyone wrinkle their noses at his appearance. He could really use a change of clothes, and a shower. And a haircut, he suddenly thought as he caught sight of Pepper at the table. It was the kind of thing she usually reminded him of. He really needed a haircut. When was the last time he had shaved?
This whole punctuality thing was suddenly seeming like not a good idea.
Bruce stood up to greet him. "Tony. Glad you could make it. Kind of surprised, but glad. We were just about to get started, as soon as Thor gets here."
"For once I'm not the last one here. What's keeping Thor?" Tony lounged in Bruce's chair and picked up the steaming mug in front of it, putting his feet up on the table.
Pepper got up and came around the table to him. "Tony. Tony, we need to talk."
Tony sipped from the mug and said, "Oh dear god, that is real coffee. Everyone has to be quiet while I enjoy this."
There was tremendous sound, like a crack of thunder or a universe ripping apart, and Thor appeared in room, crouching down, looking to be in some amount of pain.
Everyone gasped, and Pepper said, "Thor, are you okay?"
"That's not being quiet," Tony complained.
"I am fine," Thor said, coming to his feet. "I am just come from Asgard, and some of the doors between the worlds are unpleasant to traverse. Give me a moment."
Thor got his moment, and Bruce brought him the cup of coffee he had been making for himself to replace the one Tony stole. Thor sat down, and the meeting began while Bruce poured himself a third cup.
Fury said, "The first order of business was the possible threat posed by the emotional instability of one Tony Stark, but seeing as he's left his lair and isn't doing anything more offensive than smelling bad, I'm moving to dismiss. Miss Potts, you may leave."
Pepper got up and walked out, giving Tony guilt-filled glances. Tony realized that he must smell worse than he thought he did, if that was more offensive than stealing the Hulk's coffee.
Fury went on. "The second order of business is Asgard. Two days ago, Thor here received a letter from his father. He was very tight-lipped about what it said, but he asked us call a meeting at this time, and promised to be back by the time it started." Fury gave Thor a pointed glance.
Thor leaned forward to speak. "My father has asked that you all come to Asgard and aid us in a search."
"A search for what?" Steve asked.
"Loki."