Explosive Confessions
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Summary
Written in response to a prompt by thotinshield on Tumblr:
"my brain is filled with au where thorin is considered unattractive by dwarven standards, bilbo thinks hes handsome, and is pining after him, but thorin is in the classic situation of having to get married and dealing with lots of suitors and theres a bit in there about bilbo hearing some of the dwarrowdams gossiping about how thorin is "ugly" and bilbo being like WHAT"
Erebor needs a queen, and Thorin is set to marry a dwarrowdam to be his consort. No matter how much it breaks his heart, Bilbo takes it upon himself to ensure Thorin only receives the best and decides to scope out the candidates. Everything goes well, and he finds one that looks promising, until he uncovers a rather disturbing fact about the crop of potential consorts.