ElnoraWhittaker



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    "You know what this is?" he asks, somehow doubtful and hopeful at the same time.

    "Course I do! You're just a little randy. Quick spot of onanism will fix you right up," he says with what is possibly too much confidence for someone who's never directly experienced either thing, but Aziraphale seems like he needs to borrow a whole heap of confidence at the moment.

    OR

    A pair of ineffable, Eden-era turbo virgins get exposed to sex pollen.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    16,934
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
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    13 Jan 2025

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    “Well, that was a thing,” Crowley said once they were out of earshot. Without talking about it, they were both heading down the field, towards the lake where the photographer (and likely a few more people from the TV crew) was waiting.

    “That was a wedding,” Aziraphale replied, surprised at his own annoyance that somebody called a wedding a ‘thing’.

    “Yeah, obviously, didn’t miss that part,” Crowley said with a shrug, and waved abruptly in Aziraphale’s general direction. “Neither did you, from the looks of it, since you’re dressed like a wedding bride and everything.”

    “Excuse me, I am a—“ Aziraphale stopped himself, and started over.


    In which Aziraphale ends up marrying a rude stranger who wears sunglasses.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    146,878
    Chapters:
    19/19
    Comments:
    2,456
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    3,270
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    919
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    24 Jan 2024

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Chronically touch-starved, Crowley decides to try one of those "professional cuddling" places. Aziraphale volunteers there for reasons of his own. Crowley gets attached far too quickly, but it's not as one-sided as he thinks.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,924
    Chapters:
    11/11
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    319
    Kudos:
    1,417
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    319
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    12,504

    20 Dec 2023

  4. Public Bookmark 56

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    Aziraphale and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day - or: Aziraphale has a bad day. Crowley makes it better.

    This is self-indulgent fluff for when you have a hard day and could do with a nice vicarious cuddle.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,486
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    27
    Kudos:
    386
    Bookmarks:
    56
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    18 Dec 2023

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Aziraphale has known for a long time that something was wrong with Crowley's memory. He learns to navigate it. Learns to hide the hurt when Crowley acts like he doesn't know Aziraphale loves him; learns to always remind Crowley to protect himself, that they are a danger to each other. Crowley speaks to Aziraphale in thousands of languages, says I love you every way but with words, and still Aziraphale can never be certain what he doesn't remember and what he simply chooses not to speak of. Aziraphale tries to explain, to someone who does not have the memories to understand, the choice he has made.

    New chapter: Crowley tells Aziraphale what it was like to be the one who couldn't remember. What it *was* like, past tense, because Aziraphale has kept his promise.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,514
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    58
    Kudos:
    465
    Bookmarks:
    100
    Hits:
    4,126

    13 Dec 2023