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You have always had issues with anxiety, a constant jittering in your bones that refuses to settle leading into the hollow, gaping void of your chest and gut. You have always been anxious, so you bite your lips, worrying at the lines of them, catching on skin and peeling it away in long, thin lines. The act settles you though you do not know why it does so like nothing else, it does not take long to grow used to the taste of iron on your tongue.
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Every Step That I Ran To You by mittamoo for transandrewminyard (nocturnalboys)
Fandoms: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
15 Jun 2019
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The sight of Neil grumbling good-naturedly as he slides into the car eases something in his chest. What Andrew wants to say is; hello, I missed you, I love you. What he says is.
“Good to see you didn’t die in transit.”
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“Oh darling,” she murmurs to the uncomprehending bundle nestled in her arms, not regretful, not quite, “what have I done to you?”
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And, involuntarily, he gasps. In that moment as the water fills his lungs peace fills his head as he can’t help but remember what his mother once told him.
“You know Abram,” she’d said quietly with a tug on his hair “men that drown in the ocean do not drown in water, but instead the salt bursts veins and the men drown in their own blood” -
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For Neil, words have always been a warzone. Dangerous things fraught with traps one wrong move springing forth the sharp slide of a blade, and later the feeling of pulled out hair and throbbing ribs. Eventually he learns that silence is the safest option. Silence doesn’t allow for a slip in accent or the wrong turn of phrase. Staying silent stops blow after blow from hard fists and sharp voice I’m doing this because I love you Abram, you need to learn.
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