Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The first time it happens, he’s four years old and he almost gives his poor mother a heart attack.

His mom unlocks the apartment door and Izuku sprints inside, skipping and bouncing and beaming from ear to ear. They’re just arriving home from a visit to the hospital, a few weeks since Izuku’s fourth birthday.

“I knew it!” Izuku says brightly, punching both fists into the air. “I knew I had a Quirk! I knew I did!”

His mom smiles right along with him, pulling the door shut behind her. “I’m so happy for you, Izuku!” she says, beaming. “I wonder what your Quirk will be…?”

“I hope it’s something heroic!” Izuku proclaims ecstatically. He’s always dreamed of the day he finally got his Quirk, and he has a few ideas in mind of what he wants it to be. “I want to be able to save people--!”

It happens at that moment--Izuku feels this odd, pulling sensation in his chest, and then suddenly, he’s in the air. His feet don’t touch the ground, and he feels...weird. Like he’s missing something.

There’s a thud from below, and Izuku looks down. He sees himself crumpled on the floor, lifeless and still.

He blinks.

“Izuku!?” his mom shrieks, her eyes going wide with fear.

He blinks again for lack of better thing to do.

What just happened...?

His mother screams and rushes towards his body--a body Izuku isn’t currently... in? It doesn’t make sense, but it seems right in his mind, for some reason.  

“Nonono, I’m okay, Mom!” Izuku exclaims, hoping she can hear him--she does, and her head snaps up, her arms cradling his lifeless body. It’s weird to look at.

His mother stares at him. Or, rather, through him, he guesses. It doesn’t seem like she can actually see him.

“Izuku?” she calls, voice laced with horror, but also relief. “Are you okay? Where are you?”

“I’m right here!” Izuku calls back, beaming even brighter. He looks down at himself, curious; he can see the floor through his hands, and he’s wearing the same clothes as his physical body. He’s completely transparent.

“Mom, MomMomMomMomMom, I think this is my Quirk!” Izuku exclaims, head snapping up and smile getting wider. “I can leave my body!”

He says it like it’s a good thing, but his mother just seems vaguely terrified.

“I-Izuku, c-can...can you...come back?” she asks, her voice trembling, and Izuku realizes that, oh, he should probably check that. As much fun as it is to just float without a care in the world, it’d be unfortunate if he can’t actually return to his body.

“Oh!” he says, and he shuts his eyes for a moment, concentrating. He feels the tug again, and this time, he’s physically yanked; when he opens his eyes, he’s back in his body, in his mom’s arms, and she’s staring down at him.

“Izuku!” she cries, hugging him tightly. “What--!”

He squirms, and she lets him go, though reluctantly. “I found it!” he says excitedly, and his mother continues to stare at him. “I found my Quirk! Waitwaitwait, lemme see if I can do it again--!”

“I-Izuku--!”

His body hits the floor as his spirit takes air.

“Izuku!”

By the time he’s seven, he’s learned to control it.

For the most part.

There are a few times he slips up by accident--he stops paying attention to the teacher during class and his spirit subconsciously zips out of his body, just like that. On one occasion, a paramedic actually showed up at the school because the teacher freaked and called an ambulance.

It wasn’t until his mother explained it to the teachers that, “Yes, yes, I know it’s strange, but this is actually his Quirk, it’s odd I know but, he’s fine,” that they finally calmed down.

And now Izuku does it for fun.

He’s still practicing, still trying to get the hang of it, because if he wants to become a hero he’s going to have to figure out how the dang Quirk works--

“MOM! MOM LOOK!”

His mother turns. And then, she jumps. Izuku is holding a book--the first time he’s ever picked something up as a ghost.

“MOM LOOK I FIGURED OUT HOW TO PICK STUFF UP!” he cheers--to his mother, of course, it looks simply like there’s a book floating by her face, but she knows it’s him so it’s fine. Izuku is too excited to care how it looks right now. “AND NOOOOWWW…”

Izuku concentrates. The book falls through his hands and hits the floor below.

“...IT’S GONE!” Izuku finishes, and he beams.

His mother blinks, then smiles.

“I’m happy you’re learning to control it, Izuku,” she says, like she always does when he improves. “Just, please...warn me next time when you’re not actually... in your body, okay, sweetheart?”

“Okay!” Izuku chirps, and he floats off to find his body. He can’t quite remember where he left it.

When he returns to his body, the first thing he does is race to the bathroom and throw up.

Seems he can’t hold onto things for very long without some kind of real, physical backlash.

Izuku hates junior high, really, truly hates it, and it’s not because he hates learning.

It’s because Kacchan is there, and Kacchan hurts. Hurts him.  

“You think you can be a hero with some useless Quirk like that!?” Kacchan snarls at him, so close to his face that Izuku can feel his spit on his cheeks. His hands are on Izuku’s shoulders, slamming him against the school locker, and his nails dig into Izuku’s skin, and it hurts, it hurts, it hurts so badly--

Izuku shuts his eyes tightly. And then the pain stops, and he’s floating above his limp body. His body crumples to the floor, sliding out of Kacchan’s grip, and Kacchan shrieks and stumbles back. He knows about Izuku’s Quirk, he just..never expects it.

Kacchan growls, hands trembling at his sides. “Deku!” he screeches, and Izuku swallows back sobs, cupping his hands around his mouth. Kacchan can’t hurt him when he’s a ghost, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t scared. “Get back here! Is this the kind of person you wanna be, huh!? Just some worthless coward!?”

No, Izuku thinks, staring at the floor through his translucent shoes, it isn’t. But I don’t want to hurt anymore.

He waits for Kacchan to finally leave before slipping back into his body. He has a new bruise on his head from smacking the floor, and his shoulders ache and burn, but at least Kacchan is gone.

His mother’s gotten used to him coming home with bruises. His Quirk isn’t exactly the safest to use--unless he’s on a bed or couch when he activates it, he always ends up with new bruises (or scratches, depending on where and how hard he falls).

But not burns. Never burns.

He steps into the apartment, closes the door behind him, and immediately pulls his sleeve further down so it covers his wrist.

“Welcome home, Izuku!” his mother calls from further inside the apartment--she knows it’s him, he’s the only one other than her who has a key. Izuku hears water running at the sink; the water cuts, and footsteps replace it.

A part of Izuku wants to run, to zip out of his body and dart up his room.

He doesn’t.

And even if he did, it’d be counterproductive; Mom would find his body anyway, find the burns and bruises that for once weren’t caused by his own Quirk, and she’d eventually find Izuku--his ghost--no matter how silent he was. He’d never been very good at hiding from her. Maybe it’s a mother thing.

She turns the corner, smiling--and then, when she catches sight of his face, the smile melts into horror. She races towards him, and he turns his head so he doesn’t have to meet her eyes.

She takes his hands in hers, and he winces when her fingertips brush the burns. Burns that weren’t there when he left for school this morning. Burns Kacchan gave him.

“Izuku, what happened?” Mom asks, voice soaked with fear. He doesn’t answer, and she cups his face in her hands and turns his head so he looks at her. She inhales sharply, one hand brushing his hair off his forehead, where the biggest bruise is.

“What happened?” She’s more urgent this time, holding his gaze even as he fights to look away. “Izuku, tell me what hap-- Izuku!”

He can’t help it. A tug pulls his ghost away, and his mother catches his body before it hits the floor.

“Izuku!” his mother snaps, hooking her arms beneath his to keep his limp body from hitting the ground. She’s angry now, but Izuku knows it’s just because she’s worried. “If you don’t tell me what happened--!”

“I-I’m sorry!” Izuku’s voice is more shrill than he means it to be, and he slips back into his body immediately. The pain returns, spiking through his wrists and shoulders and head, and he winces. His mother releases him, but keeps her hands on his shoulders, just in case.

“I-I didn’t mean to do that,” Izuku pants. He feels oddly out of breath, but he doesn’t know why. “S-Sometimes w-when…w-when I’m overwhelmed I just…” He swishes a hand through the air, voice shaking as he tries not to cry. “Y-Y’know, zoom.”

He tries to make light of it, he really does.

His mother isn’t having it.

“That bruise on your head,” she says, moving his hair out of the way again. Her fingers ghost over the bruise (heh, ghost), and he winces, dull pain shooting through it. “You dissociated again.”

That’s what they call it: dissociation. To Izuku’s knowledge, there isn’t another Quirk quite like his in existence, so they gave it its own name. Dissociation. That’s his Quirk. Convenient sometimes, but mostly just annoying.

Izuku sucks in a sharp breath. His eyes burn with tears, but he nods.

“Why?” his mother asks, desperate now. “I-I understand that bruise, but...I-Izuku…”

That’s the problem. He has tons of bruises, and only a handful of them are because of his Quirk.

Not to mention the burns…

“Izuku...Izuku, why?”

He chokes on a sob and shakes his head feverishly, bringing his hands towards his face and rubbing his eyes with his knuckles. His mother’s hands slide from his shoulders to his back, and she hugs him tightly. A second later, he hugs her back.

His physical body hurts, and he wants to abandon it again just so he doesn’t feel its pain.

But he can’t feel his mother’s hugs in his other form, so he stays this way for now.

The next morning, Izuku tells her exactly what happened. He doesn’t want to, but he trusts her more than he trusts anybody else. He knows that she loves him and that she’d want to know if he’s being bullied--which he is.

He tells her about Kacchan. She listens, nodding periodically, until he finally finishes his story and falls silent.

After that, she rises to her feet and picks up her phone. She calls Kacchan’s mother first, then the school.

Izuku transfers to a different school a week later. No more Kacchan.

When he’s fourteen, he’s attacked by a villain.

A villain with a body made of slime and...and...well Izuku doesn’t know what else, but it smells rancid and rotten and Izuku tries to run, but he isn’t fast enough. The monster grabs him, restrains him, chokes him, and Izuku struggles and kicks and tries to scream, but he can’t because he’s choking, no because he’s drowning--

He dissociates. His body falls limp and his ghost soares into the air. He feels something different this time, a more distinguishable, noticeable tug, and he realizes it’s because he’s dying.

Because he’s being killed--

He flies. He phazes through the villain’s head, hoping the feeling is enough to startle it. The villain does notice it, and for just a moment, he raises his head and looks around, confused.

Yes! Izuku thinks, giving himself a mental high-five. Yes, yes, yes, I did it--!

A gust of wind shoots out of nowhere, and Izuku screeches, sent flying backwards through the air, out of the tunnel and back into the open. The slime villain and Izuku’s lifeless body fly with him, the slime villain’s body splashing and scattering in all directions.

Izuku’s own body is on the ground in a heap, unmoving, and Izuku moves towards it curiously.

Wellp, that just happened, he thinks, and he slips back into his body. He aches all over, and his head pounds something awful, but he’s alive, and he’s not unconscious, which is good. He pushes himself off the ground and raises a hand to his head, wincing.  

I must’ve been saved by a hero, Izuku thinks; his fingers touch a bruise on his head, and he yanks them back, hissing through his teeth. Guess that’s a good thing. There’s only so much my Quirk can do against a villain that doesn’t actually have a true body like most people...

He hears footsteps and lifts his head further.

Immediately, his eyes go wide with shock.

It’s All Might. All Might saved him.

Izuku has to fight to hold his ghost in his body, when really he wants to shoot up into outer space and scream it to the universe.

All Might had always been his inspiration ever since he was little, before he even found his Quirk. To actually meet him face to face like this was...it's amazing.

“Hello there, my boy!” All Might says, and Izuku comes so close to dissociating, just because he can’t believe it. He feels, quite literally, floaty, and it takes every effort not to zoom straight into the stratosphere. “I’m sorry for getting you caught up with all that! Are you alright?”

Izuku nods frantically, beaming so brightly it hurts. “You’re my idol!” he blurts, before he can stop himself. And then, all in one breath: “HolycrapI’vebeenwantingtomeetyouforyearsIhavesomanyquestions…”

He rambles on, and All Might chuckles, gathered the remains of the sludge villain’s body into two identical...soda bottles? That’s what they look like. Izuku wonders how so much slime can fit into such a small space, but then again, this is All Might, so he shouldn’t be surprised by anything..

“--AndI’vealwayslookeduptoyouandyou’resocoolandthanksforsavingmeand--”

All Might chuckles again, but this time he speaks. “Well, you’re quite the chatterbox, aren’t you?” he asks, and Izuku blushes, twisting his shoe into the ground. “That’s quite alright, my boy! However, as much as I’d love to stay and chat, I have to be somewhere.”

Izuku’s head snaps up again. “W-Wait, you’re leaving?”

“Mm-hmm. Crime doesn’t turn itself in.”

“B-But I…”

All Might claps his hands together, like he’s pleading his case. “Sorry, kiddo, but I’ve reeeeally gotta go. Message me on my website, wouldja?”

“W-Wait, I--”

All Might turns away. “Thank you for your continued support!”

“W-wait, p-please--!”

Izuku reaches out, around the same time All Might crouches to blast into the sky.

It’s not really a conscious decision, and Izuku doesn’t really mean to do it. He latches onto All Might’s leg--with his actual body, dissociating right now wouldn’t do any good--and the hero launches into the sky with force to rival a rocket’s.

Honestly, with that whiplash, Izuku wonders if his soul shouldn’t be ripped from his body.

“That--” All Might says, spinning around to face him, “--was incredibly stupid. While I admire the tenacity of youth, there is a fine line between tenacious and insanity!”

Izuku is too busy trying to suck air back into his lungs to answer. They’re on a rooftop, where All Might landed shortly after blasting off, and Izuku feels vaguely like he’s being strangled. He agrees with All Might, here; it was incredibly reckless, the thing he’d done.

But that doesn’t matter.

He leaps to his feet. “All Might, c-can I--”

“No, I’m out of time, my boy,” All Might says, heading for the edge of the roof. “Sorry for running, but there’s somewhere I need to be. I have some unfinished business to attend to.”

“W-Wait, p-plea--!”

“Kiddo, I’m sorry, but I can’t--”

“Can I be a hero with a useless Quirk!?”

His voice has risen in pitch, an entire octave at that. He isn’t sure whether All Might understood him until the hero stops and glances over his shoulder.

Izuku stops, struggling to find the words. His hands clench and unclench at his sides. “I...I-I was born with...with an essentially useless Quirk,” he explains hesitantly. Kacchan’s words, punches and jeers come back to him all at once, and he winces. “E-Even if...even if my Quirk isn’t suitable for being a hero, c-can I… can I still become one!?”

His voice is a squeak now, a desperate plea, and after that he braces himself, waits, hopes.

“An unsuitable Quirk…?” All Might begins, but doesn’t finish; there’s a burst of steam and smoke, and Izuku throws up his hands to brace himself.

The answer is no.

All Might’s answer is no, anyway. No, he can’t be a hero with his measley power. Izuku hadn’t explained what it was; he’d been too shocked to do so, in fact. All Might told him his greatest secret, that his smile was a lie to hide the truth, that, with little to no power, it was impossible to become a hero.

At that point Izuku’s Quirk hadn’t even mattered, because Izuku had been hoping for a miracle and that hope was crushed.

Now, Izuku walks down sidewalks, keeping head down. That floaty feeling is gone and he’s left with an odd...emptiness, despite the fact that his soul is still very much attached to his physical body.

As he walks, he cries. A couple bystanders give him weird looks, but he doesn’t even care.

He’s tried his best. He was born with a Quirk, learned how to control his Quirk (for the most part--there are times when his emotions are enough to shake his soul from his body, but for the most part he can control it). He’s only ever dreamed of becoming a hero. It’s all he wants.

But…

...But…

He wants to scream. He wants to abandon his body somewhere and just float up into space and never be seen again. Kacchan’s going to keep hitting him, keep hurting him and burning him. They don’t go to the same school anymore but it’s going to happen if Izuku tries becoming a hero.

It’s like All Might said. In the end, Izuku knew it would turn out like this.

After all…

...With his power, he may as well just be Quirkless, right?

An explosion snaps him from his thoughts, and his head whips around. Smoke rises a few blocks down; he hears screams and shouts and watches as citizens disperse and run in all directions.

It’s a villain attack, he knows it’s a villain attack.

His feet move on their own as he goes to investigate.

It’s not just any villain.

It’s the slime villain. The slime villain who attacked Izuku earlier, and he (it?) has a hostage now. That’s what the nearby citizens are screaming. The villain has a hostage, and it’s a boy, a kid, and Izuku squeezes through the crowd to look, and--

It’s Kacchan.

It’s Kacchan and he’s thrashing and screaming and yelling and his eyes are so furious but also so scared, and Izuku doesn’t think he’s ever seen Kacchan look like this.

Kacchan, his bully.

Kacchan, who made Izuku transfer schools.

Kacchan, screaming and thrashing and scared.

And Izuku doesn’t think. Doesn’t give himself the chance to think.

He sprints.

His feet slam into the ground, one after the other, over and over and over again as he runs, runs, runs. This is bad, this is horrible and he can’t let the villain take Kacchan’s life. He doesn’t know why. He hates Kacchan and Kacchan hates him and he doesn’t know why he wants to save him so desperately.

He doesn’t know why, only that he does.

He doesn’t dissociate--that hadn’t worked on the slime villain earlier so he doesn’t do it again. Rather, he swings his backpack around and hurls it with all his might at the slime villain’s bulging eyes. A notebook flies free, stabs the slime villain in the eye with the corner, and the villain lets out a roar of pain, releasing his grip on Kacchan for a mere second.

Kacchan coughs, chokes, tries to get his breath back. Izuku claws and grabs at the villain’s body, trying to pull Kacchan free.

“You worthle--GET OUT OF HERE!” Kacchan yells furiously, glaring at Izuku like he’s the one attacking him, not the slime villain. “You worthless piece of crap, I don’t need your help--!”

“SHUT UP!” Izuku snaps back at him, suddenly very furious. He’s crying now, sure, but he’s angrier than he’s been in a long, long time. “Shut up, Kacchan! Do you think I care that you don’t think you need my help!? Do you think I care about that at all!?”

Kacchan falls silent immediately.

“You aren’t some kind of immortal, unstoppable being, Kacchan, you’re human!” Izuku cries, voice breaking. “You’re human, just like I am! And I can’t just stand back and let you die!”  

And then, All Might steps in. The situation is resolved within the next ten seconds.

Izuku wonders if it’d be rude to dissociate and sink right into the ground. He knows that he most certainly could, what with his Quirk, but he decides not to. It would be pretty rude. What said “screw you” more than leaving your body and sinking into the ground?

A couple of pros are chewing him out, telling him that it was dumb to step in and that he could have been killed. They’re angry, all of them, scolding him and telling him he’s an idiot.

Izuku apologizes, but doesn’t mean it. He’d do it again in a heartbeat.

All Might is swamped by reporters, so Izuku doesn’t bother trying to talk to him this time. Not right now, at the very least. When the pros are (finally) done chewing Izuku out, he gets to his feet and runs home.

He never looks back once.

He tumbles through the door and immediately dissociates. He flees his body and shoots up to his room; he hears his mother call after him, but doesn’t really care. She’ll find him in a few seconds, but he’s going to take those few seconds to gather his thoughts. Outside his own body, thank you very much.

“Izuku!? Izu-- AHH!”

Oh. His mother must have found his body. Now he feels bad for not warning her. You would think, though, that she’d be used to seeing his lifeless body crumpled in random places.

Still, though.

He hears her footsteps, storming up towards his room, and he hovers over his bed and braces himself.

Mom flings open the door. Her eyes are watering, but her teeth are gritted.

“You have no reason to be doing that, young man!” Mom shouts at him (or, not directly at him--she can’t see him, of course). Izuku flinches, staring through his shoes at the ground. “Go get your body, Izuku! You can’t keep doing that!”

She leaves the room, and he waits until she steps off the last stair before fleeing back towards his physical body.

He slips inside. The pain starts immediately, this time on his arm. A new bruise, then. Whoopty-do. His mother is right, he really does have to stop doing that. He’s going to wind up seriously hurting himself one of these days…

He stands and slinks into the kitchen, dragging his feet. He hears Mom bustling about, opening and closing the freezer door; a second later, she steps in front of him and hands him an ice pack. He takes it and presses it to his arm.

“Thanks, Mom,” he says.  

She nods wordlessly, then speaks. “I saw the news.”

Izuku tenses.

If Mom notices, she gives no indication that she does. Rather, she plunges on. “You leapt in there to save that Katsuki boy, even though…” Her eyes water, but the tears don’t fall. Yet. “Even though he…”

Izuku swallows thickly. “He was scared, Mom. He was in danger. I couldn’t just...”

“I know he was, I-I just...” Mom wrings her hands together, then sighs and shakes her head. When she meets his gaze again, she’s smiling gently, but there’s pain in her eyes. “You really are too goldenhearted for your own good, Izuku.”

Izuku bites his lip. “It’s probably going to get me killed someday. O-Or, y’know, if toppling down the stairs again doesn’t…”

His mother frowns. “I know you’re trying to be funny, but it’s not funny.”

“I-I know.” He lowers the ice; the bruise stings, but he’s had worse.

Mom takes the ice pack from his hand and puts it back in the freezer. “The heroes who were on-sight at the time,” she begins. “What did they say to you jumping in like that?”

“O-Oh, t-they...they were...they were mad at me.” Izuku shifts his weight awkwardly. “They chewed me out pretty good, said I must’ve had some kind of...some kind of a death wish...”

Mom freezes, hand still on the door.

“...Mom…?”

“They chewed you out,” his mother says, and there’s venom in her tone. Izuku takes a step backwards. “They were going to stand back and let that boy die and they chewed you out for helping.”

“I-It’s fine, Mom…”

“I don’t think it’s fine,” Mom snaps, and Izuku takes another step backwards. “They slack off on their jobs so badly a boy has to jump in, and then they scold the boy for it?”

“I-I know, b-but…” Izuku shifts again. “You don’t...you don’t need to get so upset about it, really. I-I’m...I-I’m fine, it’s fine, I promise.”

The problem is, he’s really not sure whether or not he means it.

His mom accepts it, though, although she doesn’t seem happy about it. “I know,” she says. “I’m...I’m sorry for shouting at you when you came in. That wasn’t right.”

“I-It’s okay,” Izuku answers, running a hand through his hair. “You’re right, I should stop dropping like that. Someday I’ll get better with that, I promise, just…”

A light bulb goes off in his head, and he grins.

“...Nobody knows when.”

His mother stares at him.

“Izuku.”

Zip.

“IZUKU.”

And he’s gone again.  

The next day sucks.

If the bullying ended the day he transferred schools and got away from Kacchan, it’d be all he could ever ask for. Unfortunately, it didn’t. It’s not nearly as bad at his new school, considering Kacchan isn’t here, but even so, it sucks. It royally sucks.

“Oh, look! It’s the freak who went after the slime villain!” one of said bullies jeers, pointing at him. Behind him, two other bullies laugh and cackle. “Hey, what were you tryin’ to do, huh? Be a hero?”

“Stop it,” Izuku hisses under his breath--not that it’s ever done any good. Not that it’ll ever do any good.

The bullies laugh just a little louder, and Izuku power walks out of the classroom. He endures the school day without zooming out of his body (though he’s come close a fair few times), then heads home with a heavy heart.

He makes it to his neighborhood.

And then a voice calls out to him.

“My boy!”

Izuku freezes, one foot still in the air mid-step, and spins around. All Might--not the “hero,” but the “person,” his true form--sprints towards him, looking frantic.

Wellp, Izuku thinks, a pull at his chest, guess I'll die--

“Hold on,” All Might pants, and Izuku barely manages to keep his ghost attached to his body where it belongs. All Might straightens up to look at him, panting like he’d run the whole way.

“I’m...sorry...I didn’t contact you sooner,” All Might breathes. “You ran home as soon as the incident was resolved and, well, I couldn’t shake the press fast enough to get to you. I’m truly sorry.”

Izuku is shaking his head before All Might finishes speaking. “N-No, it’s okay!” he says, waving his hands back and forth. “I-It’s really fine, honest. A-after all…” He lowers his hands and looks down at his shoes, for once not translucent. “...I’m the one who got in the way. I-I’m sorry--”

“That’s where you’re wrong, kiddo.”

Izuku stops, and his head snaps up. All Might smiles back at him.

“If it wasn’t for you,” All Might says, “I wouldn’t have been spurred to act when I did.”

Izuku’s eyes go wide.  

“On the rooftop, yesterday…” All Might’s voice is thick. “I...I said some things that I regret, some things that I know hurt you. I told you you couldn’t become a hero, and that...that was wrong of me. I’m sorry. And.”

(He raises a finger as Izuku opens his mouth, and Izuku stops, letting the hero continue.)

“...I’m here now to tell you something. Something I should’ve said the day I met you.”

Izuku listens, holding onto every word.

“Top heroes have stories from their school days,” All Might begins slowly. “And most of those stories have one thing in common: their bodies moved, before they had the chance to think.”

And then, Izuku’s hit with it. His eyes burn, and he ducks his head, his chest filling with knots.

When All Might speaks again, there’s a smile in his words.

“That happened to you, too, didn’t it?”

Izuku nods, teeth gritted. His knees hit the asphalt, his hands clutch his chest, and he sobs.

“Midoriya...my boy… you can become a hero.”

The tears flow. The dam breaks. He’s overwhelmed. He ties his spirit to his body, because right now would be a bad time to drop.

Is this happening? Is this really, really happening right now? He can’t believe it. He’s almost scared to believe it.

This is it, he thinks, his throat tight, like he’s being strangled. This is it, It can’t get any better than this, it can’t...

“I deem you worthy of my power,” All Might goes on. “My Quirk is yours to inherit.”

Izuku’s head snaps up, tears flying. His mind goes blank.

“What.”

“My Quirk,” All Might continues, like that makes any more sense. “If you’ll accept it, I’d like to make you my successor.”

“What.”

“My Quirk,” All Might says, for a third time. “It’s a power to pass on power, a power to carry hope and light through generations to come. The incarnation of power, one might say, cultivated from one user to the other. It’s called...”

At this, All Might pauses dramatically.

“...One For All. Cultivated from generation to generation. A light to pierce through the darkness. A hope when there is no other hope.”  

Izuku blinks. “One...For All…?”

“Exactly!” All Might says, swinging an arm around to point at him. “And, if you’ll accept it...then this power is yours!”

Izuku blinks again.

He’s asking me…

...Asking me if I want his power. Asking me if I want what could possibly be the most powerful Quirk in the world.

I can be a hero. With this power--no, with his power…

Is it really possible?

Can I really…?

“I’d understand if you want more time to think about it,” All Might says, turning away briefly. “It’s a hard decision to make, I’m sure, but--”

“I’ll do it!”

All Might spins towards him again. “Well, that was quick. You sure, kiddo? You’ve thought it over?”

Izuku nods shakily. “If...I-If I can become a hero,” he says, “then, then I...I want to try! I want to be a hero more than anything else in the world, so...I-I’ll do it!”

All Might smiles. “In that case, my boy,” he says, “I look forward to working with you. Oh, hold on…”

He pauses, resting his chin in his hand for a moment.

“You mentioned having a Quirk,” he says, to which Izuku nods. “Well, would you mind sharing just what kind of Quirk that is?”

“Oh!” Izuku says; he wipes the remaining tear tracks off his face with his sleeves, then grins. “I can do this!”

He snaps his fingers, just to be dramatic, and his spirit leaves his body to crumple on the ground in a heap.

Izuku hadn’t thought it possible for a grown man to make such a shrill, high-pitched noise, but life is full of surprises.

Chapter Text

Izuku tumbles through the front door and immediately falls, catching himself on his hands and knees. His eyes burn as he gasps for breath, and his chest feels oddly tight.

Further into the house, he hears running water. “Izuku! If I walk out there and your body’s on the porch, I’m going to be upset!”

“N-No, I’m still in my body!” Izuku hollers back, shakily getting to his feet. He hears the tap cut, followed by footsteps. His mother turns the corner from the kitchen, drying her hands on her apron.

She takes one look at his face, and her eyes go wide. “What happened?” she asks--and of course she expects the worst. She’s learned to expect the worst.

“N-Nothing happened,” Izuku assures her--and then, a second later, “I-I mean, w-well, nothing bad happened, i-it’s just...there’s this...there’s this thing, this thing that happened, a-and i-i-it’s k-kind of--”

She steps forward and settles her hands on his forearms. “Izuku.”

“Y-Yeah?”

“Calm down. You’re going to do it again.”

“R-R-Right, I-I, erm, d-do...d-do you gotta sec?”

His mother nods. “Of course.” She doesn’t release him, merely guides him out of the doorway and into the living room. Izuku drags his feet as he follows; his spirit longs to zip out of his body and disappear into the floor or something, but he represses the urge.

They sit down on the couch, and while Mom turns to him, Izuku turns the other way, fidgeting nervously.

“S-S-So, I, um…” Izuku messes with a loose string on his shirt. “...I met All Might today.”

Mom’s eyes go wide. “You...you actually met him?” she asks, to which Izuku nods. “Izuku, that’s wonderful!” she exclaims. “What’s the problem, then? What are you nervous about?”

“HeaskedmeifIwantedtobehissuccessorandIsaidyes.”

His mother blinks. “Izuku.”

Izuku takes in a breath. “He...he asked me to be his successor,” he answers at length, calming down enough to form coherent sentences. “A-And...A-And I said yes.”

He watches, watches his mother’s eyes widen with shock, watches her cup both hands around her mouth.

“D-Don’t freak out!” Izuku shrieks, like the complete hypocrite that he is, his voice an octave higher than usual. “Just let...let me explain it, okay?”

She doesn’t look any less horrified, but she nods, and Izuku tells her everything--everything about One For All, that is. He leaves out All Might’s true form for now, merely because he isn’t sure that’s something the hero wants to be shared; but nothing else is hidden.

He tells her about One For All, how it’s a Quirk that cultivates power, to be passed down through generations to maintain hope and peace. She listens, taking this in and nodding periodically. The look on her face doesn’t change, though, which is a little concerning.

“--I said yes,” Izuku finishes, his chest tight. More than ever, he wants to zip off and hide in a closet somewhere. Or maybe just phase through the floor, that’s an option too. “He...He offered me his power, and...and I said yes.”

Mom stares at him. “I-Izuku, that’s--!”

“I know it’s crazy!” Izuku blurts, before he knows what he’s saying. He runs both hands through his hair and leaves them there, tugging at his locks. “I-I know it’s insane, I-I know it’s...I-I know it’s...it’s unbelievable, and it’s crazy, a-and it’s dangerous, b-but…”

“You think you can become a hero with some useless Quirk like that!?”

“Is he even human? That’s a really weird Quirk…”

“Creepy! He’s creepy, that’s what! Like some kind of ghost out of a scary movie!”

“Is this the kind of person you wanna be, huh!? Just some worthless coward!?”

“There’s no other way,” Izuku says, raising his head to meet her gaze. She looks no less reassured, no less horrified, but she’s listening. “If...If I want to be a hero...this is how I have to do it.”

He ducks his head and waits for the storm.

“...Izuku…”

He sucks in a sharp breath.

“Izuku, look at me.”

I don’t want to, he thinks, but raises his head anyway. She looks at him, takes his hands in hers and holds his gaze.

“I’m...I’m proud of you, Izuku,” Mom says, her voice shaking. “You’ve always done your best, always tried to do the right thing, and...if you want...to be All Might’s successor...if it’s something that you want and not something you’re being pressured into, then...t-then I’ll support you.”

Izuku blinks. His eyes burn. “Mom…”

“You have to promise me something, though, Izuku,” she says quickly, squeezing his fingers, and he nods and waits. “Promise me you’ll be careful. Promise me that...that you’ll…” She pauses, sucks in a breath. “...Promise you’ll always come home to me.”

Izuku nods readily. “I promise,” he says. “Even if I have to abandon my body to do it.”

She laughs weakly and shakes her head. “I’d really rather you didn’t do that, Izuku,” she says. “You know I don’t like it.”

“I-I know, I’m kidding,” he says, and he smiles. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” She smiles back. “And, I’m assuming this isn’t something you can talk about freely. This...becoming All Might’s successor, I mean.”

Izuku shakes his head immediately. “N-Not at all,” he says. “All Might said it was alright if I told you, but...yeah, it’s...it’s supposed to be a secret, because…”

He doesn’t finish, and he doesn’t need to; she nods in understanding, squeezing his fingers again.

“I know,” she says, biting her lip for a moment. “If anyone else were to find out…”

There are a couple reasons, really. The first one has to do with keeping peace and hope at the forefront of society.  To maintain a beacon to light back the darkness.

The second, “closer to home” reason has to do with Izuku’s personal safety. Because what villains wouldn’t try to forcefully steal All Might’s power away from him at any means necessary?

He shakes his head. That isn’t a pleasant thought.

His mother rises to her feet, releasing his hands, and Izuku stands. “I have dinner ready, if you’re hungry,” she offers.

Izuku beams. “Starving.”

“Remind me why I’m doing this again?” Izuku gasps, on his hands and knees in the sand with a rope clutched in his balled fists. The other end of the rope is tied around a trashed, broken refrigerator.

“It’s like I said!” All Might answers simply. “You aren’t a proper vessel yet, my boy!”

Izuku presses his forehead into the dirt. “That’s the opposite of what you said yesterday!”

“No, no, you misunderstand me,” All Might continues, and Izuku lifts his head. “In heart and in spirit, you’re the perfect vessel for One For All. However, physically…” He gestures vaguely in Izuku’s general direction. “...We have some work to do. If you force One For All onto an unprepared vessel, it’s highly likely that your limbs will blow off.”

Izuku blinks. “My limbs will what now.”

“Anyway--”

He changed the subject, Izuku thinks darkly.

“--That’s why we’re here now,” All Might goes on, spreading his arms and gesturing at the beach, loaded with garbage as far as the eye can see. “Your first objective as a hero-to-be, Young Midoriya...is clearing this horizon!”

Izuku blinks at the garbage.

Binks at All Might.

“...WHAT!?”

The boy has no presence.

Sometimes, Toshinori thinks he’s alone, only to turn and see the boy standing in the corner of his eye. It’s scared the living daylights out of him more than once, and the boy apologizes profusely every time, swearing that he didn’t mean to startle him and that he’ll try not to do it again.

Except, it does happen again, several times, because the boy simply has no presence. It’s like he’s not even there, even when he is in his physical form.

And Toshinori wishes that’s the most unsettling thing there is about Izuku Midoriya.

“Tell me more about your Quirk, my boy,” Toshinori offers; Izuku is on the ground, face-down in the sand, back heaving with every breath.

Izuku raises his head and spits sand out of his mouth. “There’s...t-there’s really not much to it,” he pants, pushing himself off the ground. Sweat sticks sand to his forearms, but he makes no move to wipe it away. He stopped doing that a while ago. “I just...turn into a ghost.”

“Don’t be so quick to write it off,” Toshinori says, shaking his head. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard of something quite like it before. Tell me, Midoriya, what happens to your body when you, ahh... leave it?”

“M-My actual body…?”

Toshinori nods. “Do you still breathe, does your heart stop, that sort of thing.”

“O-Oh.” Izuku wipes sand off his face with his hands. It’s counterproductive, though, because there’s sand on his knuckles too. “I-It’s kinda...confusing. My heart doesn’t stop, and I-I still breathe, but...it’s really...faint, I guess? Like, my breathing is really shallow, and you can’t hear my heartbeat unless you really listen out for it.”

“I see.” Toshinori thinks this over. It’s a bit terrifying, though, when he thinks about it too much, so he moves on quickly. “Does it have any negative, physical effect on your body, or…?”

“Not unless I try interacting with the physical world,” Izuku answers plainly. “If I do that for more than a few seconds it usually makes me nauseous. O-Oh, and I can’t go longer than twelve hours outside my body.”

Toshinori blinks. That’s new. “Why not?”

“I...I don’t know.” Izuku pauses, looks down at the sand. He grabs a fistful of it and lets it run through his fingers. A nervous habit, perhaps. “I’ve never...actually done it. Just, whenever it gets close to being twelve hours I just...start feeling strangled. Which is weird, because ghosts don’t have lungs, but...I don’t know, it’s strange. I’m...scared to find out what would happen if I actually, you know...stayed out for longer than twelve hours.”

“If you think it’s dangerous to attempt, you should avoid it,” Toshinori advises. “Your Quirk is an odd one, my boy. If you think something might be wrong, you’re best stopping while you’re ahead. Now then--!” He claps his hands together. “Please resume!”

Izuku scrambles to his feet, salutes cheesily, and runs off.

Toshinori has seen Izuku “die” (for lack of better word) a fair amount of times thus far, but that doesn’t mean he’ll ever get used to it.

There’s no warning, never a warning, never any indication that he’s about to drop. He could be smiling and laughing one moment, and the next moment, his eyes roll back in his head and he’s limp and unmoving on the ground.

Toshinori wonders, briefly, if Izuku realizes how terrifying a sight it is to behold. To watch a person--a kid-- just drop like that, for no apparent reason. The first time Izuku did it, Toshinori had actually panicked, because there was no way the boy could just drop like that in his own free with.

Except he did. Except he does.

That’s…

...Well, Toshinori doesn’t really know what to think about that.

And then, there’s the scar.

Toshinori noticed it the day they met, but never brought it up: Izuku has a rather large scar that starts at his left temple, cuts diagonally along the bridge of his nose, then ends at his right cheek. It’s jagged and white and far too prominent for a boy his age, and Toshinori has no idea how it got there.

He doesn’t mention it for a long time. After all, Toshinori has scars of his own, scars he doesn’t like to talk about, and he thinks that maybe, Izuku sees his scar the same way.

Except, curiosity gets the better of him eventually, and he asks.

“Midoriya, my boy, how did you get that scar?”

Izuku frowns at him; he’s loading a box of something into the back of a truck. Toshinori doesn’t know what this “something” is, only that it must be heavy, considering Izuku’s struggle.

“Oh.” Izuku pushes the box over the edge and turns towards him fully, ignoring the crash and shatter as the box tips into the back of the truck. “This?” He traces the scar on his face with his index finger, like he’s done it a million times.

Toshinori nods. “And, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t feel comfortable, I simply--”

“Ahh, no, it’s fine!” Izuku stammers in his haste to answer, and then, he laughs shakily, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s...actually a pretty funny story...do you, erm, do you wanna hear it…?”

“If you’re alright with sharing.”

This is definitely the right thing to say, because Izuku beams and launches right into it.

“So, right after I transferred schools in junior high, this kid in my class thought it’d be funny to prank the new kid in front of everybody in the class. Something about public humiliation, I guess, I don’t know. Anyway, he ended up actually doing it, and he scared me so badly I just, y’know, took off.”

Izuku laughs again, less shakily this time, and he goes on, gesturing with his hands.

“So picture this: I’m a ghost, and my physical head slams into the side of the desk,” Izuku explains animatedly. “My classmates didn’t know about my Quirk yet, though, so to them it just looked like I dropped dead, I think.

“Anyway, so, I split my head open, there’s blood all over the desk, and everyone just starts screaming, and I’m just...I’m just floating there, watching it all go down. I was kinda...scared, I think, because I didn’t try calling out to anyone to let them know I was okay. The teacher freaked, he was worse than everyone else, and--”

The boy goes on like this for quite some time, explaining the entire story, and Toshinori is relieved. At least the boy doesn’t have emotional burdens attached to his scars.

Except...he mentioned transferring schools.

Transferring schools.

Huh.

Well…

...That’s new information.

Ten months fly by, and the day of the U.A. entrance exam arrives. To say Izuku is nervous would be the greatest understatement in the world.

He completed his task and cleared the horizon of Dagobah beach; the first rays of sunlights stretch over the sands, bathing it orange and yellow. There isn’t a piece of garbage in sight.

“You did well, my boy!” All Might says, beaming--but of course that’s a given. “And just in the nick of time, too!”

Izuku manages a shaky smile. He’s covered in sweat and dirt and who knows what else, but none of that matters. Ten months. Ten months of working himself to the ground and he’s finally here.

He’s made it. There was a finish line set before him and he’s finally crossed it.

He sniffs, wiping his eyes with the backs of his hands. “I-It a-almost doesn’t seem fair,” he murmurs, throat tight. “Y-You giving me this power, I-I mean…”

“What do you mean?” All Might asks quizzically. “Midoriya, receiving something and earning something are two very different things. And believe me, you earned this power through your own efforts.”

Izuku wipes his eyes with the back of his hand, then straightens up. That’s right, he thinks. Ten long months of training, clearing the horizon. Becoming a hero…

(All Might plucks a strand of hair from his head.)

...This is my start!

“Eat this!” All Might says, holding the strand out to him.

Izuku blinks.

“What?”

Mental note: hair does not go down easily.  

It’s unpleasant, and throughout the entirety of the day, Izuku finds himself swallowing reflexively. He tries not to think about it, really, he does, but he has a knack for overthinking things.

He sucks in a deep breath, staring at the towering building before him. U.A. High, the highschool of his dreams, and he’s finally able to go, finally able to take the entrance exam.

Finally able to become a hero.

Kacchan storms past him, and on instinct, Izuku springs out of the way. Kacchan doesn’t talk to him, doesn’t give him so much as a glance; he storms up the front steps with a group of students and disappears within the double doors.

Izuku is left there, staring for a moment or two--then, he shakes his head feverishly, setting his resolve.

This is it, he tells himself, starting towards the doors. The first step...to becoming a hero!

And with that, he promptly trips over his own feet and falls towards the ground.

Well, this is the end, he thinks--he’s crumpled to the ground enough times that it doesn’t really bother him anymore--

He stops.

Mid-air, he stops.

And it’s not because of anything he did.

He stares at the ground, inches away from his nose.

“Are you okay?”

There are hands on his shoulders, pushing him upright and setting him back on his feet where he belongs. It’s a girl, a girl with bright eyes and an even brighter smile, and Izuku stares at her without meaning to

“It’s my Quirk!” the girl says cheerfully, tapping her fingertips together, and it’s a miracle that Izuku’s ghost actually stays in his body because holy crap there’s a girl. “I-I’m sorry for using it without asking! But it would be bad luck if you fell, right? Well, I have to go inside! Good luck!”

She runs off, and a second or two later, once he’s sure he can keep his ghost in his body where it belongs, he runs in after her.  

Roughly thirty minutes later finds the applying students split into several groups, each group set at a particular training city on-campus.

This place is massive, Izuku thinks, staring up at the structure’s walls. Behind it lies a mock-city, though it’s so enormous it may as well be a real one. And this is only one of the training sections?

He supposes it only makes sense. U.A. High is the most prestigious hero academy in Japan, after all. Of course it’s overkill.

Kacchan isn’t in this group with him; however, the nice girl from earlier is, along with...someone else Izuku accidently upset by mumbling excessively under his breath while Present Mic was explaining the exercise a short while ago.

Izuku glances over his shoulder. The boy he upset earlier is there, arms crossed; he straightens his glasses, looking much too serious for such an occasion.

“THE EXAM STARTS NOW!”

The voice booms overhead--Present Mic again, and all heads snap upwards in confusion.

“THERE’S NO TIME TO WASTE, GO!” Present Mic’s voice thunders. “BETTER HURRY UP! THE CLOCK’S TICKIN’!”

The confusion is replaced with determination, and when the students charge through the double doors and into the training city, Izuku runs with them.

Robots, he calls to mind, turning a corner quickly and branching away from the rest of the students. This exam is determined by a point system depending on how many robots you beat. I wonder…

A robot spins around the corner. It has a single, glowing red eye that locks on Izuku immediately.

“Target acquired,” the robot’s voice chirps, followed by a series of clicks and whistles.

Immediately Izuku dissociates. His body hits the ground beneath him and he charges at the robot.

He phases through the metal shell. An uncomfortable, indescribable feeling comes over him for a second, and he shivers. He’s never liked phasing through things, but this is a special occasion.

He’s inside the robot, wires and cross-beams everywhere, and Izuku doesn’t waste any time. The robot is locked on his physical body; he has to hurry.

He concentrates on his hands--just his hands, nothing more--and then, he reaches out and grabs two handfuls of wires, blues and reds and yellows. He gets a firm grip on them and yanks.

The wires tear free, and Izuku releases them and zips out of the robot’s body, hovering in the air above it. The robot creaks and groans and stumbles; and then, the flashing light of its mechanical eye flickers and goes out.

Yes! Izuku cheers, zooming back into his body. His stomach twists, and he has a new bruise on his head, but he ignores that, gets to his feet, and keeps running.

He does the same thing to the next robot he sees, and then to the next one after that. He doesn’t keep count; numbers would just slow him down at this point. Besides, he’ll find out either way on the test results if he’s accepted--

No, when I’m accepted, he corrects himself, grabbing fistfulls of wires and yanking them, successfully maiming the robot. I’m going to get in. I’m going to get in.

I have to get in.

He takes off running, on the lookout for more robots. He doesn’t know how many he’s taken down yet, and it doesn’t matter. He keeps running, down twisting roads and sidewalks.

He’s puked a total of three times since he began dismantling the robots from the inside, and acid leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. It only makes sense, considering how mentally taxing it is to interact with the physical world as a spirit, but he ignores it and moves on.

I have to get in, I have to get in, I have to get in--

He stumbles into a clearing and skids to a halt.

A ton of other students are here, taking down robots how they see fit. The girl from earlier taps robots, sends them into the air, then smashes them into the ground with a mere touch of her fingertips. The boy from earlier runs and slams into robots feet-first; he has some kind of speed Quirk, then.

“TIME’S ALMOST UP!” a voice overhead booms. “MAKE THIS COUNT, EVERYBODY!”

Izuku turns down another alleyway and runs. He doesn’t see any robots  here yet, but he keeps looking anyway.

It’s odd that there haven’t been any zero-pointers yet, Izuku thinks as his shoes slam into the ground, one after the other. You’d think that by now, so far into the exam--

The ground lurches beneath him, and Izuku is thrown off his feet, scraping his palms on the concrete as he catches himself. He flips over onto his back and stares up at the sky; the ground trembles again, even more violently this time, and Izuku lets out a long, heaving sigh.

Wellp, I just jinxed it, didn’t I, he thinks dryly, and he scrambles to his feet and takes off running in the direction from whence he came.   

He sprints back into the clearing. Around him, students charge down the street in the opposite direction, screaming and yelling in terror. Izuku’s head snaps up and he looks at the object of their terror, not really knowing what to expect.

And there’s the zero-pointer, towering at a height well over the city’s highest skyscrapers, metal eyes beady and laser-focused. Izuku’s heart begins to pound, and his eyes go wide with shock and horror.

Wait...THAT’S the zero-pointer!? Izuku thinks, his mind drawn on a blank. But that’s...isn’t that a little overkill!?

And then he remembers that this is U.A., literal overkill incarnate.

There’s no point in taking it out, literally, Izuku thinks, ready to turn and run off--for a few reasons, actually, 1) being he needs more points and 2) being he really, really doesn’t want to get squashed by that thing. And even if there was, there’s no way I can pull out wires to bring it down like I did with the smaller ones. Those wires must be massive.

He’s about to turn when he catches something out of the corner of his eye.

The nice girl from earlier, just a little ways in front of the zero-pointer, pinned down by the legs with large chunks of cement.

Izuku’s mind goes blank. The screams and shouts of fellow heroes-to-be fade out until he can’t hear anything at all.

“It’d be bad luck if you fell, right?”

Izuku doesn’t think about it.

He runs towards the robot and fires up One For All for the very first time.

One For All does not make a good first impression, and Izuku is sent home after breaking both legs and one arm--the arm from when he’d punched, and the legs from when he’d leapt into the air to deliver said punch.

The school’s nurse had fixed him up while he was unconscious, taking special care with his legs, then sent him home with a sling and a promise that his broken arm would be healed within the next couple of days.

That’s good, Izuku supposes. He doesn’t know how many robots he took out minus the zero-pointer, and he only hopes the amount is enough to get him into U.A.

He spends the next day feverish in bed. Maintaining a semi-physical connection with the world while a ghost always spelled ill-will for his actual body, and usually he can push through it after throwing up once or twice. However, coupled with the exhaustion of Recovery Girl’s Quirk on his broken bones, he’s bedridden for a full twenty four hours.

“So...this new power of yours,” Mom starts, simply but worriedly, changing out the rag on his forehead; he’s in bed and she’s sitting beside him. She’s not as worried now as she used to be whenever this happened. It’s happened often enough in the past for her to take it all in stride now. “It...breaks your bones.”

“Well, right now it does,” Izuku croaks. His throat feels like sandpaper. “But I’ll...um…” He frowns, not really sure what train of thought he’d been on. “I’ll...talk to All Might about it.”

Mom hums. “You do that,” she says. “The last thing you need is another self-destructive Quirk.”

That’s…

That’s fair.

“B-Believe me, it’s not fun for me, either,” Izuku says, and he sighs. “Thanks for, y’know...not freaking out about all this.”

She sighs. “I try not to, but you really do worry me sometimes.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

She sighs again, but this time, she shakes her head. “Just...try to be careful,” she says. “I know being a hero isn’t exactly the...the safest line of work out there, but...stay safe, okay?”

He nods. “I will. I promise.”

“Good.” She brushes his hair out of his face and kisses his temple. “Sleep well.”

“You too. Goodnight. Love you.”

“I love you, too, Izuku.”

She shuts off the light and leaves the room, pulling the door shut behind her.

Toshinori is kicking himself in the butt. He should’ve warned the kid about the physical backlash of using One For All.

Sure, the kid trained for ten months and was definitely a suitable vessel, but...it wasn’t ideal. Ten months was just barely enough for his body to be able to harness the Quirk without literally exploding. It’s going to take a long time before Izuku can use it without injuring himself.

Still, though. Toshinori should’ve warned the kid and he feels incredibly guilty for not doing so.

He stands on the shores of Dagobah beach, the horizon clear and the moonlight reflecting off the ocean waves. He hasn’t heard from the kid for the past couple of days, and a part of him is worried.

...No, actually, all of him is worried.

After a lot of mental debate, he pulls out his phone and finds Izuku’s number. They’d been contacting each other for the past ten months; it’s the most convenient way to plan training days.

Toshinori’s thumbs swipe across the screen.

Toshinori
Haven’t heard from you in a while.
How are you doing?

He doesn’t really expect a response, so he’s surprised when his phone buzzes exactly ten seconds later.

Izuku Midoriya
lowkey dying but okay
you?

Toshinori
Well, I’m officially worried.
You alright?

Izuku Midoriya
I’m sick.
Something about overusing my Quirk.
Idk it’s always been really confusing.
Oh and my arm’s still broken so there’s that.

Toshinori
I’m sorry. I should have warned you about that.

Izuku Midoriya
It’s fine. I did kind of drop dead in front of you
as a first impression so…we’re even.
Anyway, do you need something…?

Toshinori
I was going to ask if you could meet me at Dagobah.
But since you’re sick it’ll have to wait until another day.

Izuku Midoriya
Yeah you’re probably right.
It’s okay, though. I’ll be with you in spirit!

Toshinori takes it in the metaphorical sense, of course, and is shocked when Izuku--as a ghost--actually shows up.

“You meant that literally,” Toshinori says flatly. He doesn’t know why he even bothers being surprised by this kid anymore.

He can’t see the boy, but he can feel Izuku’s grin. “Never let it be said I turned down the opportunity for a good joke.”

Chapter Text

The letter comes late at night roughly a week later, after Izuku is completely recovered. The envelope has “U.A. HIGH” written in golden font on the front, and Izuku knows in a heartbeat that it’s his results from the entrance exam.

He’s in his room now, and it’d be completely dark if it weren’t for his desk lamp. In front of him on the desk’s surface lies the envelope, still sealed, and for a while, he does nothing but stare at it.

I know I did well, he thinks, taking up the envelope and examining it with great care. The golden letters catch the light of the desk lamp, like they’re winking at him. I know I took down a lot of robots as a ghost, but...I wasn’t keeping count, so it could be anything…

Eventually, he can’t take the suspense any longer, and he tears the envelope open.  There’s a written letter and a small, disc-shaped object about an inch thick. The moment it hits the table, there’s a small clicking sound, and then, a projection lights up over it.

“YOUNG MIDORIYA! I AM HERE AS A PROJECTION!”

Izuku shrieks and throws himself backwards, falling out of the desk chair and landing in a heap on the floor. He winces briefly, makes sure his spirit is attached to hits body where it belongs, then bounces back to his feet and stares at the projection.

It’s All Might, and of course it is--no one else has a voice quite as booming and enthusiastic as him. But that’s almost more confusing.

“Now, I know what you’re thinking!” All Might goes on animatedly. “What am I doing at U.A., you ask? Well, the answer to that is quite simple--I was offered a job by the principal, and of course I accepted! Starting this upcoming school year, I’ll have the privilege of working as a teacher to raise up the next generation of heroes!”

Beside himself, Izuku beams. Considering how horrible a handle he currently has on One For All, it’d be unfortunate if All Might wasn’t teaching at U.A.

“But, this isn’t about that right now!” All Might continues: “This is about your test results, Young Midoriya, and whether or not you passed the entrance exam.”

Izuku’s smile fades, and he clutches the edge of his desk.

Please be enough, please be enough, please be enough…

“You passed the written exam,” All Might says, “but I’m sure you’ve already figured that just through self-scoring.” (He’s right.) “As for the physical exam, Young Midoriya…”

Izuku bites his lip. Please be enough, please be enough, please be enough--

The numbers flash on-screen.

RESCUE POINTS: 60
COMBAT POINTS: 79

Izuku’s eyes go wide.

...I got…

...WHAT!?

He knew he’d taken out a lot of robots--the physical backlash it’d had on his body was enough to tell him that much--but...but seventy nine? Sure, each robot was worth a certain amount of points that added up to his total, but still. To reach that high a number...he took out that many?

“You did well, Midoriya!” All Might says, flashing him a thumbs-up. “Also, for the record, I wasn’t one of the teachers who graded you, so there was no favoritism involved! You know what that means, Midoriya?”

All Might’s smile grows, if that’s even possible.

“You did this on your own, my boy. This is because of your own efforts and hard work.”

Izuku can’t believe this is happening. All his life, this has been his dream, his goal, the thing he’s wanted more than anything else in the world. And now... now...

“Come along, Young Midoriya,” All Might’s projection goes on, and he holds out a hand dramatically. “This...is your hero academia!”

Tears roll down his face, and Izuku nods feverishly, rubbing his eyes with the backs of his hands. The projection cuts shortly thereafter, and Izuku stands there, staring at the wall.

Three seconds pass.

“YES!” he shrieks, leaping into the air and fist-bumping nothing. “I DID IT! I DID IT! WHOOHOO!”

“Izuku!?” There’s frantic banging on his bedroom door. Mom. “Are you alright!? What happened!?”

Izuku laughs giddily, then rushes to open the door. He swings it open and stands there, panting but beaming at his mother. The look on his face must be enough confirmation, because her eyes widen, and this huge smile breaks over her face.

“Izuku!” she cries, and she throws her arms around him, and he hugs her back excitedly, still laughing and beaming and completely beside himself.

He’s done it.

This coming school year, he’ll be an official student of U.A. High.

That same night, Toshinori receives a text from the kid.

Izuku Midoriya
wehakjsdwejiosadk

Toshinori
I take it the letter arrived, then. :)

Izuku Midoriya
WHEAKJsdjOWEKALSd

Toshinori
That’s a yes?

Izuku Midoriya
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Toshinori
Alright, definitely a yes.
Congrats, kiddo!

Izuku Midoriya
:D :D :D :D :D

Toshinori
Anyway, how are you?

Izuku Midoriya
IM SCREAMING

Toshinori
Yep, I bet. I’m proud of you! :)

Izuku Midoriya
AAAAAHHHHHH

Toshinori
Sorry to change the subject,
but can you meet me at Dagobah?

Izuku Midoriya
YES
ON MY WAY
:D :D :D

Toshinori slips his phone into his pocket and raises his head towards the clear horizon. There’s a couple sitting at the edge of the dock, and dock that had only recently been put there. Having Izuku clear the beach as part of his training had been mainly because it was a convenient way for Izuku to build muscle, but also, thanks to that, the citizens can now enjoy the beach, and that’s an added bonus.

Toshinori takes in a breath. He remembers recording Izuku’s acceptance letter at U.A., and earlier than that, hearing word from the principal that the boy had been accepted with an outstanding performance at the exam. Sixty rescue points and seventy-nine combat points. Toshinori can’t help the pride he feels hearing those numbers. His protege is truly an incredible kid.

“Whatcha doin’?”

Toshinori answers without thinking. “Oh, nothing much, just lost in th--”

And then he thinks about it.

He whirls around with an indistinguishable shout of something; Izuku lets out a small shriek, startled by Toshinori’s reaction. His eyes are bright and owlish, like always, and Toshinori finds himself wondering how on earth he hadn’t noticed Izuku standing next to him until now.

“Midoriya!?” Toshinori breathes. “What-- how--!”

“I’m sorry!” Izuku says quickly, waving his hands back and forth. “I-I didn’t mean to freak you out again--!”

“How long have you been there!?” Toshinori gasps, willing his heart to return to normal tempo.

“I-I, um, t-two minutes m-maybe?”

“Two minutes!?”

“I-I’m sorry, I-I’ll let you know I’m here next time! I just…” The boy stops, looking away and twiddling his thumbs. “You looked like you were thinking about something, so...I didn’t want to interrupt…”

Toshinori inhales deeply, finally getting over most of the shock. He really, really should stop being surprised by this boy...

“Ahh, well…” Toshinori holds out a hand. Izuku blinks at him, and it’s only now that Toshinori realizes the boy’s eyes glow softly in the darkness. Like glow sticks that’ve been cracked for a few hours. “Congrats on getting accepted into U.A., kid.”  

This cheers Izuku up immediately, and he beams, accepting Toshinori’s high-five with more enthusiasm than he probably meant to use. “Thanks!” he says, and Toshinori shakes out his hand to get rid of the sting.

After that, they discuss One For All. Izuku tells him what it was like using the Quirk for the first time--he compares it to a microwave, good lord this child--and Toshinori explains that, yes, for now, whenever Izuku uses One For All, chances are he’ll break his bones.

“But,” Toshinori adds, when Izuku’s shoulders slump in disappointment, “the more you train your body, the better vessel you will become. Don’t be discouraged, my boy. You’ll be able to use this power without harming yourself before you even know it.”

Izuku perks up again at that, and he beams.

Kacchan isn’t happy. And, of course, he usually isn’t, when it comes to Izuku's success in life, but...

Kacchan slams him against the wall of an alley by Izuku’s school; Izuku’s sharp cry of shock is muffled by his own sharp inhale as the back of his head hits the wall and hands pin him there by his shoulders.

“I told you not to go to U.A.,” Kacchan snarls in his face. “You remember me telling you that, don’t you? Don’t you, Deku?”

Izuku swallows thicky. “I remember,” he says. His knees are shaking. Every bone in his body--or, rather, his spirit longing to be free--screams run, run, run, run, run, and Izuku feels a familiar tug at his chest, whether or not he’s allowing it.

“You wanna run again, is that it?” Kacchan’s voice brings him back into reality, and Izuku stares at him with wide eyes. “You just wanna keep running, instead of facing me head on,” Kacchan continues, eyes narrowed. “You’ve always been like that, though. You’ve always been a coward. You and that coward’s Quirk.”

He’s so close, and Izuku’s shoulders, where Kacchan is holding him, are burning. It stings. It hurts. Not nearly as much as Kacchan’s words, but even so.

Kacchan slams him up against the wall again, harder this time, and Izuku chokes, trying not to cry.

“Answer me, Deku.”

Izuku says nothing.

Kacchan grits his teeth and throws himself back, his hands dropping from Izuku’s shoulders, and Izuku sucks in a sharp, shaky breath, finally able to breathe again. Some of the tension in his chest eases; he doesn’t feel the suffocating urge to flee anymore.

“If you know what’s best for you,” Kacchan growls, “you’ll tell U.A. you won’t be attending. What makes you think they’ll want you in the school with that freaky Quirk, anyway? After all, you’re not human.”

Izuku rubs his shoulder, and Kacchan’s next words hit him like a sack of bricks.

“You’re a monster.”

He leaves Izuku behind, and as soon as he’s gone, Izuku slides to the ground and cries.

Honestly, Izuku can take a lot. A whole lot. He can take punches and burns and insults.  

But not that. Never that. No matter what happens, those words will always feel like icy daggers in his heart.

Izuku doesn’t tell his mother about Kacchan cornering him this time, but he decides that if Kacchan does it again, he will.

Kacchan doesn’t do it again.

Izuku has already dissociated thrice since waking up, and he hasn’t even left the house yet.

“Izuku, you really need to stop that,” Mom says, putting her head in her hands. “I know you’re nervous, but...could you please…?”

“Nervous” seems like an understatement. Izuku is terrified. It’s the first day of the school year, his first day as an official student of U.A. High, and he’s more scared than he’s ever been before in his life.

“I-I know, s-sorry,” Izuku says, running his fingers through his hair. His hands are shaking. “It’s just t-today’s the day and I’ve been waiting for this for so long and I’m so nervous and I don’t know what’s--”

His mother’s fingers curl around his wrist, not tight enough to hurt, but tight enough to keep him grounded in reality. When he looks at her, her eyes bear into his.

“Izuku. Calm down.”

“Okay.” Izuku’s voice is a hoarse squeak, and he’s not actually sure his mother can understand him. She lets him go, and he grabs his backpack off a dining chair and swings it over his shoulder. “I’m heading out now, Mom, bye!”

“I-Izuku, wait.”

He looks at her over his shoulder, hand outstretched towards the doorknob. “Ahh, I’m...I-I’m kind of in a hurry…”

“I’m proud of you, Izuku.”

Izuku blinks, and Mom pauses, glancing down at the floor for a few moments. When she raises her head again, she’s smiling, although shakily.

“I...I-I know I’m...overprotective of you sometimes,” she says, “but...I’m really, truly proud of you. Even after everything, after Katsuki…” She stops, then shakes her head. “You haven’t given up, and...I think that’s brave of you. You’re going to be an amazing hero.”

Izuku blinks again, but then, he smiles. “Thanks, Mom.”

She hugs him shortly, and then he heads off for the train station.

Finding Classroom 1-A once he’s in the building is easy enough. The classroom has a huge, towering door at least three times his height, with a red A painted from top to bottom. It’s nearly impossible to miss.

However, finding the courage to actually open said door is an entirely different matter.

Izuku takes in a breath. Don’t be nervous. It’s fine. You trained for this. It’s going to be alright.

He reaches out and grasps the handle. An image of Kacchan and the boy with glasses he’d upset at the entrance exam pop into his mind’s eye, and he swallows thickly.

Please don’t be any of the scary people, please don’t be any of the scary people, please don’t be any of the scary people--

He opens the door.

“--wrong to put your feet on the desk!” the kid with the glasses is yelling, slicing the air with his hands as though for emphasis. “Don’t you think it’s disrespectful of our senpais and the people who made the desk!?”

Kacchan smirks at him. He makes no move to take his feet off the desk.

Izuku watches the scene, and a small part of him dies on the inside.

Wellp. Guess I’ll die, then, he thinks, but he doesn’t. Collapsing in front of these people won’t solve anything. Maybe if I slide past them they’ll just ignore me…

That’s something he’s always been good at: being ignored. Whether or not he means to be, sometimes. He’s been told by a fair amount of people that he has no presence whatsoever. Maybe it’s a side-effect of his Quirk. He’s never known.

He moves across the room. The rest of who he assumes are his new classmates don’t give him so much as a second glance, chatting and talking with one another, introducing themselves, the likes. It’s a good thing.

Izuku almost makes it to the back of the room without incident.

And then, an elbow slams into the back of his head, and he stumbles forward with a pained yelp.

“Oh, crap!”

A hand reaches out, grabbing his forearm and holding him steady. Izuku turns, absentmindedly rubbing the new bruise on the back of his head.

“I’m so sorry, dude!” says the offender--he has bright red, spiky hair, and he looks caught somewhere between concern and embarrassment. “I didn’t know you were there, I’m sorry. You okay?”

Izuku nods immediately. “I’m...I’m fine,” he says, and he laughs shakily. “Sorry, it’s my fault. I should’ve been more careful. I’ve been told I don’t have any presence, so, I mean...it’s more my fault than yours.”

The kid sighs. “Still, though,” he says, “I’m sorry. Not the kind of first impression I wanted to make. Anyway, I’m Kirishima!” At this, he jabs both thumbs at his chest proudly. “I hope we can still be friends, even though I smacked ya.”

“T-That’s fine!” Izuku says, the word friends lingering in the forefront of his mind for an extra moment. It’s a term he isn’t quite familiar with. “M-My name is Midoriya. It’s nice to meet you!”   

“Nice to meet you t--wait.” Kirishima stops, and his eyes go wide. “You’re Midoriya!?”

Izuku takes a step backwards. That’s weird, he thinks, does he know who I am...? I’ve never seen him before…

“Umm…” Izuku gives a nervous smile, hoping it doesn’t look as forced as it feels. “...Yes...?”

“DUDE!” Kirishima starts forward, grinning even wider than before, which just confuses Izuku all over again. “You’re the guy who came first in the entrance exam!”

Izuku’s train of thought derails. “I’m the what now.”

“Man, sorry, I’m just really surprised!” Kirishima goes on animatedly, smacking himself on the forehead. “I wasn’t expecting it to be someone like you! N-Not that, you know, it’s a bad thing, I just wasn’t expecting someone with such little presence to be so fricking tough!”

There’s...there’s something here. Something Izuku isn’t getting. “You say what?”

“O-Oh, you’re here!”

The conversation stops, and Kirishima and Izuku turn. The nice girl from earlier bounces up to them, a cheerful smile on her face.

“You got in!” the girl says to Izuku, and her smile is so bright it almost hurts his eyes. “That’s great! You were so awesome when you blew that robot away! It was like…” She swings her fist through the air; Kirishima ducks beneath it. “Boom, and pow! It was so cool!”

Heat rises to Izuku’s cheeks, and he laughs shakily. “Thanks for breaking the fall for me,” he says. “Hitting the pavement like that probably would’ve left a couple scratches…”

If, by a couple scratches, you mean death, a part of him chirps. He ignores it.

The girl shakes her head. “It’s the least I can do after you saved me!” she answers, like it’s obvious, and Izuku’s blushing and fidgeting again. “Anyway, I’m Uraraka Ochako! It’s nice to meet you!”

“You’re all too noisy. Stop wasting time and sit down.”

Izuku, the girl, and Kirishima turn.

Izuku’s first impression of Aizawa Shouta is not a good one.

Their homeroom teacher seems...cold. And maybe that’s exactly what he is. That’s what he seems, anyway, just from watching him and listening to him. For the life of him, Izuku has no idea what to expect.

He certainly doesn’t expect being shunted outside with his new classmates for a Quirk assessment test on the very first day of school.

There’s no “welcome” ceremony, no introduction to the kinds of things they’ll be doing during the school year; all they get is a “Follow me” from Aizawa, and then, they’re marching down the hall, all twenty of them, not really walking in any specific kind of order.

Izuku can’t help but feel nervous, almost nervous enough to zip right back out of his body and go hide somewhere. Kirishima and the nice girl, Uraraka, are further up ahead, and he takes up the rear to avoid awkwardness--and people bumping into him, due to the whole “lack of presence” thing and whatnot.

He follows everyone outside.

It’s a Quirk apprehension test, apparently, which is just. Brilliant. Izuku has one Quirk that literally explodes his bones and another Quirk that drops him dead.

Whoopty-do, Izuku thinks. This is how it ends, isn’t it.

Aizawa gives Kacchan a baseball and has him stand in the center of a circle spray painted onto the dirt. A ball-throw. Simple enough, Izuku thinks. Surely there’s something he can do--

With a loud shriek of “DIE!!” Kacchan hurls the ball into the air, sending explosions behind it. The ball soars, soars, soars--and then disappears.

Izuku’s heart drops to his stomach.

Well, then.

“Also, I didn’t mention this before,” Aizawa says, turning towards the group again, “but whoever comes last in this Quirk apprehension test will be expelled due to lack of potential.”

Izuku’s muscles go rigid.

WELL, THEN.

“Dissociation” is a pretty useless Quirk when it comes to apprehension tests. It doesn’t grant Izuku superhuman strength, nor does it boost his body in any way; he can only glide as a ghost as fast as he can run as a human, and the same applies for his strength (when he interacts with the physical world, that is).  

The only thing Izuku thinks he stands a chance at is the ball throw. If he drops his body and focuses his hands, he can carry the ball as far as he pleases. Sure, it’s not how he wants to introduce his Quirk to his classmates--after all, he’d really like to break his habit of dropping dead in front of people as a first impression--but he needs to get a good score. He can’t afford to come in last and get expelled.

Aizawa hands him the ball, and he moves to stand in the circle. Everyone else has already gone, and most of them have impressive results. Izuku stands there for a long moment, then takes a deep breath, a familiar tug at his chest. He shuts his eyes for a moment, breathes, then--

“What the heck kind of Quirk is that!? It’s scary!”

Izuku’s eyes snap open, his spirit grounding itself in his body a second before leaving. He glances over his shoulder; Uraraka waves cheerily at him, and Kirishima gives him an encouraging thumbs up.

“Is he even human? That’s a really weird Quirk.”

“Creepy! You’re creepy!”

“He always sneaks up on me. I can never tell when he’s there.”

“That’s pretty scary.”

“I don’t like it.”

“Anytime now, Midoriya,” Aizawa deadpans, and Izuku’s head whips around towards him. “We don’t have all day.”

“S-Sorry,” Izuku says, straightening up again. His shoulders are tense, and his spirit has no plans to leave his body. He looks down at the ball, then raises his head towards the air.

Well…

One For All surges through his skin, hot like fire, and he pulls back his arm.

...I just won’t use it, then.

Toshinori knows something is wrong the moment Izuku hesitates.

He’s been watching the Quirk apprehension test from the sidelines ever since the beginning, so far unseen and unheard. This year’s batch of heroes looks especially promising with a few small exceptions; for the most part, they all show to have a good handle on their Quirks and know how to utilize them to their full potential.

And then there’s the ball throw.

And then there’s Izuku.

Up until now, Izuku hasn’t been able to use “dissociation” to help whatsoever in the test, which makes sense. But now, with the ball throw, Izuku has a chance. He can show everyone what he can do. Sure, Toshinori hates watching the kid drop like a marionette with its strings suddenly cut, and he wishes someone would catch him, but he doesn’t intervene. This is the boy’s moment.

He watches. Watches Izuku step into the circle. Watches the boy close his eyes for a moment in concentration.

But he doesn’t do it. Izuku’s eyes snap open suddenly, like he’s been hurt, and he looks around. A few of his classmates wave at him and smile, but he doesn’t react.

And then, he uses One For All. Granted, Aizawa stops him at first and tells him that if all he can do is break himself, then he may as well stop while he’s ahead, and Izuku, of course, proves him wrong, pouring One For All into his fingertip and firing off the ball that way.

He looks way too proud of himself, and he grins at Aizawa through the pain of his broken finger. Aizawa actually seems impressed, which is definitely a rarity for him.

But something is wrong. Toshinori has known Izuku for almost a full year now, and he knows something is wrong.

He makes a mental note to approach the boy as soon as he can find a moment alone with him; for whatever reason, Izuku doesn’t seem ready to share his Quirk with his classmates just yet.

A logical ruse.

Of course. Of-freaking- course. It didn’t make sense that U.A. would expel students on the first day, anyway. When Izuku lands last in the Quirk apprehension test, like he knew he would from the get go, all he gets from Aizawa is a grin and an, “It was a logical ruse to deceive you into doing your best.”

Most of the students take it well. There’s some shock at the betrayal at first, sure, but then it’s just relief.  However, the boy with glasses--Izuku now knows his name is Iida--does not take it nearly as well.

“A logical ruse,” Iida says absentmindedly as they leave the school building, ready to head home. “I can’t say I agree with that mindset. Our trust in him is bound to waver if he keeps this up--”

“Hey! You two! Wait for me!”

Izuku and Iida turn, stop; Uraraka sprints towards them, beaming brightly.

“Ahh, Infinity Girl,” Iida greets once she catches up. “You did wonderfully at the ball throw. Your name is Uraraka, correct?”

The girl nods eagerly. “And you’re Iida,” she says, pointing to him, “and you’re--” her finger moves to Izuku, “--Deku!”

Izuku blanches. “...N-No, not actually…”

“Huh?” Uraraka blinks in confusion. “But the loud, angry boy from earlier--he called you Deku, didn’t he?”

“I-It’s just…” Izuku shifts his weight. “It’s an insult. He calls me that to make fun of me. My real name is Midoriya Izuku.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry!” Uraraka waves her hands back and forth, looking appalled. “I-I shouldn’t have assumed like that, that was wrong. But, actually…” Uraraka pauses for a moment or two, and then, she beams. “I actually kind of like ‘Deku’!”

Izuku blinks. So does Iida. “What?” they say in unison.

“I like Deku!” Uraraka goes on, smiling. “It gives off the feeling of, ‘This is impossible, but I’m going to do it anyway!’ It’d be a great hero name, don’t you think? Plus, I think it’s kind of cute!”

Wellp.

WELLP.

“Deku it is, then!” Izuku squeaks. His voice is an octave higher than what should be possible for a fifteen year old.

“MIDORIYA!?” Iida whirls around, looking a mixture of shocked, confused, and horrified. “Weren’t you just saying...that it’s an insult!? Why would you--!?”

“S-Sorry, today’s been crazy,” Izuku says, burying his face in his hands. “I’m not in my right frame of mind. Y-You can call me Deku if you want, though, Uraraka-san...”

“Thanks!” Uraraka says, looking much too excited. “It’ll be your nickname, then! Deku!”

Iida has a few more complaints regarding it, but in the end, he trails off and lets it be, once he’s sure Izuku doesn’t have a problem with it. It’s nice, Izuku thinks, to have a positive meaning attached to the once insult.

Maybe “Deku” can be the name of a hero after all.

All Might
I’d like to talk with you about something.
It’s about your Quirk.
Not One For All, the other one.
Do you have a second?

Izuku does not want to talk about dissociate. Does not want to think about dissociate. Sometimes he’s fine talking about it. Sometimes he enjoys talking about it. He actually has a journal specifically set aside for analyzing and documenting his Quirk, assessing what it can and can’t do.

But right now, he doesn’t want to talk about it. Or think about it.

He sends a message.

Izuku Midoriya
Could we talk later?
Now’s not the best time for me.

It’s not a lie. Now isn’t a good time.

All Might’s response comes a few seconds later, and Izuku feels almost bad about turning him down

All Might
Alright, kiddo. See you tomorrow.

And then, a second later--

All Might
Also, I’m always available if you need someone to talk to.

If that doesn’t give Izuku one hell of a guilt trip, nothing will, and he falls asleep feeling like his chest is full of lead.

The next time he sees All Might is during Hero Basic Training at school the next day. The hero is his usual self, of course, as the students line up inside one of the training cities and prepare for the lesson. All Might gives Izuku a lingering glance (concern, Izuku thinks), but that’s it.

The students are wearing their hero costumes for the first time; Izuku’s was made for him by his mother, with only a few exceptions. He’d asked the support group for something protective for his skull, and they ended up making him a biker-helmet-like thing, designed to match the teal of his jumpsuit. The helmet isn’t bulky at all; considering what it is, it’s extremely lightweight. If ever he needs to “drop” on short notice in a dangerous situation, it’ll keep concussions off the list of injuries he can get.

Today’s training seems fairly simple: two teams made up of two people each will be decided at random. The “villain” team has to guard a (paper-mache) nuclear weapon inside a multi-floor labyrinth of a building, and the “hero” team has to infiltrate the building successfully, find the weapon, and either immobilize the villains with capture tape or secure the weapon.

Seems simple enough, Izuku thinks, as All Might reaches into two separate boxes for the drawing; one box is labeled “heroes” and the other box is labeled “villains.” As long as I don’t get paired with Kacchan, I’ll be fine. Besides, the chances of me getting paired with him are pretty slim--

“And we have our teams!” All Might says. “The hero team, Midoriya and Uraraka, versus the villain team, Iida and Bakugou!”

--Are you FREAKING KIDDING ME!?

Izuku glances at Kacchan out of the corner of his eye. Kacchan is glaring in a way that can only be described as “murderous,” and Izuku looks away again quickly. Of course he’s paired with Kacchan. Of course he is. With his luck, why wouldn’t he be paired with Kacchan.

“Deku! We’re on the same team!” Uraraka says, bouncing up to him. “Let’s do our best, okay?”

Izuku smiles just a little at that. At least she’s on his team.

“Heroes, you have fifteen minutes to study the floorplan,” All Might says, “and villains, you have fifteen minutes to hide your weapon. As for the rest of you, please join me in the viewing room! We will be watching from the sidelines!”

“Good luck, Midoriya!” Kirishima says, grinning and waving, and Izuku raises a hand and waves back.

Izuku is smiling on the outside, sure, but internally, he’s screaming.

Izuku and Uraraka infiltrate the building through the window as soon as their fifteen minutes are up.

“We’re in,” Uraraka whispers, straightening up and looking around. “I don’t think they heard us come in.”

Izuku nods, turning and looking down one of the hallways. The structure is like a labyrinth, with winding halls and tunnels; he imagines it’d be easy to get lost.

He gestures for Uraraka to follow, and they start down the hallway.

“Do you have any ideas?” Izuku asks once they’re well on their way. So far so good; no sign of Iida or Kacchan.

“Not yet,” Uraraka says. “But, I imagine they’re guarding the weapon. We should find out where that is and overpower them together.”

“I don’t think ‘they’re’ guarding it,” Izuku says, peering around the corner, then continuing on when he deems it safe. “I think Iida’s guarding it, and Kac--Bakugou, I mean--he’ll be out here looking for us.”

“Really?” Uraraka asks. There’s a pause. “You sound really sure about that…”

“I am.” There’s a four-way break up ahead; Izuku and Uraraka continue towards it. “He’s going to come after us--” Me, a part of him corrects, “--and leave Iida to defend the wea--”

On cue, Kacchan leaps out in front of them from around the corner. There are sparks on his palms; a warm glow encases his hands, and--

“GET DOWN!” Izuku leaps and tackles Uraraka to the ground. Kacchan’s blast misses them by mere inches, shooting down the hall and smashing into the far wall.

Kacchan’s feet hit the ground, and he glares. “Don’t run away, Deku,” he snarls.

There’s something very different about being called Deku by Kacchan now.

Before, it’d hurt.

Now it just makes Izuku mad.

“Uraraka, run!” Izuku shouts, springing to his feet and putting his fists in front of his face. “Find Iida and the weapon, then contact me!”

“A-Are you sure!?” Uraraka questions, her voice trembling just a bit. “D-Deku--!”

He looks at her over his shoulder. “I’ll be fine, go--!”

Looking away is a mistake; Kacchan’s fist slams into his stomach, and Izuku stumbles backwards with a cry of shock (and pain). For a moment or two, he can’t breathe.

“Go, Uraraka!” Izuku yells with what breath he has left in his lungs, and this time, Uraraka runs. Her pounding footsteps grow fainter, then fade out entirely.

“You think you can face me alone!?” Kacchan grins and rushes at him, pulling back his fist for another punch. “Don’t make me laugh--!”

Izuku’s fingers coil around Kacchan’s wrist. After that, Izuku grits his teeth and lets instincts and training take over. He tightens his hold on Kacchan’s wrist, swings around, yanks him over his shoulder, and decks him back-first into the metal floor below.

Kacchan’s cry of shock is swallowed by his sharp inhale of breath, and Izuku scrambles backwards, putting as much distance as he can between him and his once childhood friend. Kacchan gets to his feet slowly, coughing and choking.

He looks at Izuku, eyes narrowed, teeth gritted.

“So you’re not running for once,” he growls.

Izuku stands his ground. “I’m not running from you. You don’t scare me anymore, Ka--” He stops, refrains; “No, you don’t scare me anymore, Bakugou.”

Kacchan--no, Bakugou--glares at him. “Don’t try and act tough now, Deku,” he snarls, turning to face him fully. “We all know how big of a coward you are. You and that coward’s Quirk.”

Izuku swallows hard, teeth gritted behind his lips. The words send sharp arrows through his chest, and he raises his fists again.

“You’re wrong,” Izuku says. “I’m going to be a hero whether you like it or not.”

Bakugou grins. “Is that so?” he questions. “Then why don’t you show your new friends your Quirk, huh?”

Izuku stops suddenly.

“If I’m wrong, like you say I am,” Bakugou goes on, “then show them your power. Show them what you are.”

“Creepy!”

“Is he even human? That’s a weird Quirk.”

“Monster! You’re a monster!”

Izuku doesn’t wait for Kacchan to move first.

He charges.

Two more punches to the gut from Bakugou and another judo-flip from Izuku later, Izuku is running, tearing down the hall and ignoring the sharp pain of his bruised skin as he does so. He hears Bakugou’s voice echoing around him, yelling at him, and Izuku tries to ignore it.

He can’t, though. Not when Bakugou’s words bounce off the walls and slam into him at every angle.

“DEKU! YOU SAID YOU WEREN’T SCARED, DIDN’T YOU!? THEN COME BACK AND PROVE IT! STOP RUNNING, YOU COWARD!”

But Izuku does run.

And as he does, all he can think about is how tired he is of running.

Chapter Text

Something is wrong.

Something is horribly, horribly wrong.

Toshinori--or, rather, “All Might” currently--watches the screen in the viewing room with the rest of Class 1-A. On one screen, Bakugou is storming through the facility, fuming. On another screen, Iida and Uraraka are standing across the room from each other, the paper-mache nuclear weapon behind Iida. And, on the final screen, Izuku is running through winding hallways and long corridors.

“Uraraka? Where are you?” Izuku asks--All Might can hear their conversation through his own earpiece. Izuku’s voice is low and breathless; it almost doesn’t sound like him. “Did you find the weapon?”

“Umm, yeah, I did,” Uraraka answers--on-screen, Iida takes a step towards her, cackling madly. Perhaps he’s taking his role as a “villain” a bit too seriously. “Umm, I found Iida, too. He knows I’m here.”

On-screen, Izuku nods, stumbles on unsteady feet, then keeps running. He’s favoring his right leg.

“Where are you?” Izuku questions.

“Four stories up from where we came in,” comes Uraraka’s answer. “There’s a small room at the edge of the building on the sixth story, that’s where we are. You’re still on the second floor, aren’t you?”

Izuku nods again. “Yeah, I am.” His voice sounds tight, too tight, and it’s not because he’s running. It sounds like he’s been crying. “Hold on, I’ve got a plan. Stay where you are, alright? Don’t let Iida put the capture tape on you.”

“Got it,” says Uraraka. The conversation ends, and the two continue their own separate ways.

Something is wrong, though. Izuku isn’t acting like himself.

All Might knows this kid, spent every day for almost a year training with this kid. Izuku is stubborn to a fault, doesn’t care about his physical body, analyzes situations before diving into them, and has an excellent sense of his surroundings. There are smaller things, too, like his lack of presence, his glowing eyes, not to mention his Quirk that All Might will never fully understand, but personality wise, All Might knows the ins and outs of this boy.

And right now, he isn’t acting like himself. All Might knows that Bakugou’s words alone wouldn’t be enough to drive Izuku into a corner, wouldn’t be enough to drive him to attack Bakugou like he had, then turn tail and flee as soon as he got the chance. There’s a deeper problem here, a much, much deeper problem.

And All Might, for the life of him, has no idea what that problem is.

He watches with the rest of the students. Everyone’s giving their own commentary; some of them are really invested in the Uraraka vs. Iida situation, but most of them, like All Might, are more concerned with the Izuku vs. Bakugou situation.

“Man, that Bakugou dude’s insane,” Kaminari says, shaking his head. “Didja see his smile? That was pretty scary.”

“I kinda don’t want him and Midoriya to run into each other again,” says Ashido, “but, on the other hand, I kind of want to see what happens if they do…”

And then, as if on cue, Izuku’s and Bakugou’s screens merge to form one big picture: they’ve found each other yet again.

“Ohhh boy.” Kirishima grinds his teeth for a moment. “Usually I wouldn’t say this, but with Bakugou smiling like...freaking book it, Midoriya.”

On-screen, Izuku tenses; across from him, Bakugou grins.

“Found ya,” Bakugou says, striding towards Izuku slowly, and Izuku takes a step backwards; All Might can’t read the look on his face. “You know, Deku…I was expecting you to last longer, you know? Before you ran off.”

He walks towards Izuku. Izuku steps back once, then twice. His hands are shaking.

“But I guess I shouldn’t have expected that, right?” Bakugou grins. Behind All Might, a couple students grimace and wince--they can’t hear the audio, but that smile on Bakugou’s face spells disaster in bright, bold print.

“You’re a coward in the end,” Bakugou says, and this time, he stretches out an arm. His gauntlet gleams in the overhead lights. “Still just as much of a coward as you were when we were little.”

Izuku doesn’t say anything.

“By the way, Deku…” Bakugou goes on, “...you know how my Quirk works, don’t you? I sweat nitroglycerin, then ignite it to make explosions.”

Something in All Might’s chest clenches. He assumes it’s his heart.

Bakugou...what are you--

“Which means,” Bakugou goes on, and then that grin is back, wider than ever. “...If the idiots in the Support Course made this the way I asked them to…then these gauntlets are full of it.”

There’s a mic on the desk, and All Might slams on its button; his voice booms over the loudspeakers in the training grounds. “Bakugou, I forbid it!” he shouts. “Do not fire! Are you trying to kill him!?”

“It won’t kill him if it doesn’t hit him!” Bakugou shouts back. His fingers close around the pin on the gauntlet, and he yanks it out.

“Bakugou--!”

All Might’s shout is drowned out by Bakugou’s blast and Izuku’s screams.

Izuku knows he broke something.

Or, possibly, several somethings.

He must’ve blacked out, because he opens his eyes to find himself out of the hallway, crumpled on the floor surrounded by chunks of cement. He raises his head; his helmet must’ve been blown off by Kacc--no, Bakugou’s blast, because his bangs hang freely in front of his eyes.

He raises his head. There’s a smoking hole in the wall; when the dust settles, Bakugou walks through it, grinning maniacally.

“That,” Bakugou says slowly, taking long, even strides towards Izuku, “was way more powerful than I expected!”  

“Bakugou!”

All Might’s voice carries over the loudspeakers, and Bakugou raises his head while Izuku staggers to his feet dazedly. The floor seems to swim beneath him, and he shakes his head to knock the dizziness away. It doesn’t help.

“If you use that attack again, the match will end, and your team will lose!” All Might goes on, and Izuku’s known the man long enough to tell he’s angry. All Might continues, scolding Bakugou for his reckless behavior, and Izuku takes the distraction as a moment to breathe.

“Deku!? Deku! I heard an explosion, are you okay?”

That’s Uraraka’s voice, sent into his ear through his communicator, and he raises a hand and presses down on the device.

“Y-Yeah, I’m...I’m fine,” he says, the tremble of his voice belying his words. “W-Where did you say you were…?”

“Umm, along the far wall of the building, North wing I think,” Uraraka chirps back. She sounds worried. “A-Are you...are you hurt? Y-You sound like you’re in pain…”

He is. “I’m fine,” he says, swallowing back the bile in his throat and studying the room for a moment. “H-Hey, Uraraka...I think I’m right underneath you.”

“Wait, really?”

Izuku nods. “I have...a plan,” he gasps. There’s a sharp pain in his chest; his ribs are probably messed up. “It’s...i-it’s crazy, but...I-I think we can do it. As soon as the floor explodes, grab the weapon.”

“The floor…?” She pauses. When her voice comes back, she sounds determined. “Got it. Good luck, Deku!”

The transmission cuts, and Izuku is dragged back into the present by Bakugou’s voice.

“Don’t run away this time, Deku,” Bakugou says, as though Izuku doesn’t have three walls on either side of him and the enemy in front of him--and then, Bakugou charges.

Izuku can’t brace himself for it. There’s no time and he has no energy. Pain leaves a fog in his mind. Bakugou grabs his wrist; his fingers burn Izuku’s skin, but Izuku’s cry of shock is cut short when Bakugou yanks him forward, swings around, pulls him over his shoulder--

Wait--

--Izuku is slammed into the floor, back-first. He chokes on his spit, the air in his lungs getting forcefully sucked out of him by the force of the hit.

“Payback from earlier,” Bakugou snarls, and his voice seems to come from very far away. Izuku’s ears are ringing, and his head feels like it’s stuffed with cotton.

Bakugou grabs his arm again and swings, and Izuku shuts down.

Bakugou has no mercy. He grabs Izuku’s arm and swings him around again, slamming him into the floor for a second time. Izuku doesn’t fight back, doesn’t react. He stopped fighting a little while ago, and All Might doesn’t know why, but something is wrong. Something is very wrong if Izuku is shutting down at a time like this.

“Just put the capture tape on him!” Kirishima is yelling, his hands buried in his hair. “You don’t have to do this, Bakugou, just put the capture tape on-- why isn’t he stopping!? Why won’t he just end it!?”

“Midoriya isn’t even fighting back anymore!” Kaminari shouts at the screen. “Just cut it out, Bakugou!”

“Put the capture tape on! Even though you’re playing the ‘villain’ here, that’s our classmate--!”

“Bakugou, knock it--! Agh, I can’t, this is painful to watch--!”

“Sensei, you have to stop this!” Hagakure’s gloved hands grab his forearm and shake him, just enough to get his attention. “You can’t let Bakugou--oh, oh no, why won’t he stop--!”

All Might snaps out of his shock. His hands fumble for the microphone. “Bakugou--!”

Bakugou slams Izuku into the ground again.

“Bakugou, stop--!”

An explosion. A scream. Izuku’s scream.

“BAKUGOU!”

Bakugou is either ignoring him, can’t hear him, or is so into the fight (if you can even call this beatdown a fight) to register what All Might’s saying.

All Might turns around. This can’t go on like this, it can’t. At this rate, something really, really horrible is going to happen.

And it isn’t going to happen to Bakugou.

All Might takes two steps. The students part like the Red Sea for him.

“URARAKA, NOW!”

That’s...Izuku’s voice. All Might hasn’t heard that in a while.

He turns back around towards the screen, as do the rest of the students, and they watch. Izuku is still on his back on the floor, and blood trickles down the side of his face, but his fist is retracted at his side.

Bakugou tries to grab him again. Golden tendrils envelop Izuku’s arm, and he throws the punch.

Not at Bakugou, though. At the ceiling.

Bakugou is blasted off his feet, and the surge of wind pressure from Izuku’s punch shoots straight through the roof, blasting out floor after floor and all the windows in the process. Izuku and Bakugou’s screens are full of smoke and dust; on Iida and Uraraka’s screens, the explosion blasts through the floor, and Uraraka springs into action.

She touches a broken pillar, then grabs ahold of it when it’s weightless. With a heroic grin, she cheers, “Improvised special move: Comet Home Run!” and proceeds to swing the pillar like a baseball bat, hitting several pieces of broken cement at Iida.

Iida raises his arms to shield himself, blocking his view of her, and Uraraka takes her chance, tapping herself so she’s weightless and throwing herself into the air. She waits until she’s above the weapon, then drops; her arms circle around it, and while she beams in triumph, Iida wails in despair.

The smoke and dust clear on the other screens, and All Might refocuses his attention on those instead.

Izuku is unconscious. There’s blood beneath his head.

Bakugou is standing a little ways off, staring. His balled fists tremble at his sides, but it’s a different than when Izuku’s hands were shaking.

Izuku was shaking in fear.

Bakugou is shaking in fury.

All Might presses the mic button again. His voice rings out through the building, declaring the hero team the winner.

Victory has never looked so much like defeat.

Toshinori--not “All Might”--rushes for the infirmary literally the moment the lesson is finished.

“All Might” had put on a brave face, as per usual, and finished the lesson with the sixteen remaining students. They’d all done well--he’d told them so at the end of their lesson, right before making a break for the elevator.

There are a number of reasons why he booked it for the elevator, and if anyone on-staff asks why, he’ll blame it on his time limit. Honestly, though, it had less to do with that and more to do with Izuku.

Toshinori isn’t that worried about the boy’s physical well-being; Izuku was unconscious earlier, but not gravely injured, and Toshinori knew Recovery Girl could get straight to work and heal his injuries without much trouble.

No. It’s Izuku’s mental state that Toshinori is worried about, because even though Izuku had thought up a strategy and carried it out in the end, something was definitely wrong. The boy had shut down for a good portion of the lesson, letting Bakugou pummel him into the ground without so much as a word of protest.

And that…

That can’t mean anything good.

Toshinori arrives at the infirmary’s door shortly thereafter, though a few hours have passed since Izuku was originally shunted away on a stretcher. He stands there for a moment or two to catch his breath, and then, he reaches for the door handle--

“You’re too reckless for your own good, I swear!”

“I know, I’m sorry.”

Toshinori stops in favor of listening, hand hovering over the handle.

“It’s only the second day of school and you’ve already been in here twice! What’s it going to take before you learn to think a little?”

“I’m sorry.”

“At this rate, you’re going to end up seriously hurting yourself, and I won’t always be able to heal you! There’s a limit to how much my Quirk can do, you know that!”

“I’m sor--”

“What are you going to do when that happens, boy? How can you save people if all you accomplish is breaking your bod--”

“I SAID I’M SORRY!”

Toshinori feels like someone dropped several ice cubes down his back.

There’s…

...There’s no way that’s Izuku’s voice.

Except, it is. That guttural, desperate voice belongs to Izuku.  

And it’s another reminder that something is very, very wrong here.

When Izuku’s voice comes back, he doesn’t sound angry anymore. Just broken. “I’m...I-I’m sorry, I-I didn’t mean t-to y-yell I just...I-I’m…”

“...It’s alright.” The bite is gone from Recovery Girl’s voice, and she sounds suddenly exhausted. “That was my fault. I shouldn’t have shouted like that after what you went through today.”

Toshinori takes this as his cue, and he pulls the door open.

Izuku is sitting on the hospital bed, gaze cast downward. He raises his head for just a second at the sound of the door opening, but as soon as he sees who it is, his head snaps back down towards his hands. One arm is bandaged; the other’s in a sling. There’s gauze around his head and a piece of cotton taped over his cheek.

Recovery Girl hops off her stool and starts towards Toshinori. “Look who finally decides to show up,” she greets, if you can really call that a greeting. “Well, I’ll leave you to it, then.”

She starts to walk past him; and then she says, in a low whisper:

“Talk to him, Toshi. He’s hiding something.”

Izuku doesn’t hear her--he’s not meant to--but Toshinori does. The door slides shut behind him, and he’s left alone with Izuku.

Izuku doesn’t look at him; he keeps his head down, fiddling with the edge of the blanket. His clothes are signed and torn in places, and his hair is more dishevelled than usual.

Toshinori sinks into Recovery Girl’s stool by the bed and folds his hands loosely. He waits, for a time, to see if Izuku will say something.

He doesn’t.

“Midoriya, my boy...why didn’t you use your Quirk?”

Izuku flinches. He’s never done that before. When he doesn’t say anything, or even so much as turn his head, Toshinori continues.

“And it’s not just now,” Toshinori says, slowly--he’s not entirely certain what to do right now, so he approaches with caution. “Yesterday, the ball throw...you could have used your Quirk then, too, but you used One For All instead.”

Izuku doesn’t react.

“And now, today,” Toshinori continues. “You very well could have used your Quirk to find the weapon and secure it, but in the end, you used One For All, when you knew it would hurt you.”

Still no reaction from Izuku.

“Midoriya, why would you--”

“Because One For All is a hero’s Quirk,” Izuku chokes out--he doesn’t exactly shout it, but the proclamation isn’t a quiet one, either. “It’s a hero’s power, a-and…‘dissociation’ is j-just...”

“Any Quirk can be a hero’s Quirk, depending on the wielder,” Toshinori cuts him off, afraid of what Izuku was about to say. “It’s not the power that makes a person, it’s the heart behind the power. Your own Quirk, too, Midoriya--”

“It’s a coward’s Quirk!” Izuku does shout this time, and Toshinori flinches back in surprise. Izuku’s voice cracks at the end, and tears gleam on his cheeks in the sunlight cast by an open window, but Toshinori can’t see Izuku’s eyes. “It’s a coward’s Quirk, and I-I--”

“You are a lot of things, Midoriya, but a coward is not one of them.”

“Yes, I am!” Izuku finally, finally looks at him, and his eyes are red and wet and full of pain. And anger. And frustration. The scar on his face is more prominent than ever, and Toshinori feels vaguely like he’s been stabbed in the gut.

“All my life, all I’ve ever done is run!” Izuku shrieks. “It’s all I can do! And I’m so--” He stops, takes in a long, shuddering breath. “I’m so tired of running! I don’t want to run anymore!”

Toshinori doesn’t say anything else. A stunned silence follows as the echo of Izuku’s shout fades from the room.

And then, Izuku’s eyes fill with tears. And terror. “I-I’m sorry,” he stammers desperately. “I-I’m sorry, I-I didn’t mean--I c-can’t--I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean t-to yell, I-I...I-I can’t…”

His voice breaks as the sobs begin, and Izuku finally caves, tears leaving wet splotches on the blanket.

Toshinori, for the life of him, has no idea what to do. It’s not like he hasn’t seen the kid cry before--actually, Izuku cries more than anyone Toshinori’s ever met--but this is different. It’s different this time.  

Toshinori rises to his feet and moves to sit on the edge of the bed beside his student. If Izuku notices, he doesn’t react, mostly focused on brushing his tears away. Toshinori hesitates, just for a moment--and then, he reaches over, awkwardly, and wraps an arm around the boy’s shaking shoulders.

Izuku doesn’t really react, at least not in the way Toshinori is expecting. Rather than tense or flinch away, the boy leans into the awkward half-hug, and the tears fall faster.

“I’m sorry,” Izuku whispers, and his voice breaks all over again. “I-I’m sorry I-I yelled, I-I’m sorry, I-I’m…”

“It’s alright, kiddo. It’s fine.” Toshinori squeezes his shoulders. “I know you didn’t mean anything by it, it’s okay. You have every right to be upset.”

“I’m frustrated,” Izuku chokes, “and I-I’m so...I-I’m so tired of just...just…”

“I know. You don’t have to explain yourself, I get it. It’s alright.”

“I...I-I didn’t even fight back.” Izuku drags in a short, shuddering breath. “I-I didn’t even t-try, I-I just...I just let him…”  

Him. Toshinori knows exactly who Izuku is talking about. “It’s not your fault,” Toshinori says. “I told Bakugou to stop, and he refused. What he did to you was wrong.”

Izuku chokes and shakes his head. “I-It was a fight,” he sobs, “w-we were s-supposed to fight each other--”

“Not like that,” Toshinori interrupts. “Bakugou didn’t do that so he could beat you. He did that because he wanted to hurt you. Regardless of the objective of the lesson, what he did was wrong.”

He wonders, briefly, how long this has been going on. For how long has Bakugou intentionally tried (and succeeded) to harm Izuku? For how long has it gone unpunished?

He shakes his head. Now’s not the time for that, he decides. There will be time for that. There will be. For now…

“You’re not a coward, Midoriya,” Toshinori says while Izuku sobs, “and your power isn’t a coward’s Quirk, either. I hope, someday...you’ll realize that you can use this power to save people.”

Izuku inhales sharply. The tears stop for a brief, brief moment--and then they’re back with vigor, and Toshinori squeezes Izuku’s shoulder for lack of better thing to do.

They sit there for a long time.

Eventually, though, Izuku pulls away, and Toshinori lets him go. “S-Sorry,” Izuku says, rubbing his eyes. “S-Sorry, I-I think...I-I’m okay now.”

Toshinori studies his face for a moment. “You sure?”

Izuku nods. “Y-Yeah, t-thanks…” He gives a nervous, shaky kind of laugh. “It...it kinda sucks, y’know...t-that I keep breaking my arms…”

Toshinori blinks. That’s certainly a sudden change of subject; maybe it’s intentional. “Yes, it is unfortunate,” he says. “But you’ll…” He stops and looks at Izuku’s face. “...Oh dear.”

He knows that look in Izuku’s eyes. He’s seen it before. Many times.

“Kid…”

“I guess you could say...” Izuku starts.

“Kid, no.”

“...There’s nothing humerus about it.”

“Midoriya.”

Izuku snaps a finger-gun at him. “Ayyyy.”

Toshinori lets out a long, heaving sigh. “I walked right into that one, didn’t I.”

Izuku gives another shaky laugh. It sounds forced. “I guess,” he says. “Sorry, I...I-I just...wanted a change of subject…”

“That’s fair,” Toshinori says, and he wonders, briefly, if puns are something of a coping method for Izuku. But that’s another conversation for another day. “Anyway, kiddo, get some rest.” Toshinori reaches out and ruffles Izuku’s hair; Izuku blinks at him for a moment. “Recovery Girl’s going to be mad at me again if you don’t.”

“O-Okay…” Izuku says, nodding. “A-And...I-I’m…” He pauses and looks away again. “I-I’m sorry.”

The kid apologizes too much, Toshinori thinks, and he opens his mouth to say that, no, he doesn’t have to apologize, that what happened today wasn’t his fault, that Bakugou was wrong, not Izuku...

But Toshinori gets the feeling that saying that won’t actually help the kid. He knows Izuku is smart, knows that he’s blaming himself, not because it’s rational, but because that’s what he does. He shoulders blame like his life depends on it, whether or not it’s actually his fault, and Toshinori knows he’ll most likely always be like this.

So Toshinori doesn’t say any of that.

Instead, the words that come out of his mouth are,

“Hello, Sorry. I’m All Might.”

The boy’s eyes widen as realization dawns, slowly at first and then all at once, and he stares at Toshinori, like he’s never seen the man before.

Toshinori snaps gun-fingers at him. “Ayyyy.”

There’s a beat.

And then, Izuku loses it, clapping his hand to his head and laughing almost hysterically. The tears are still there, but the laughter is honest and pure, and Toshinori finds himself smiling.

He knows he’s inexperienced as a mentor and that he’s still learning what it actually means to guide someone...

But at least he can make the kid laugh.

Izuku doesn’t know for how long he sleeps, only that when he wakes up, the sun is setting outside the infirmary window.

Izuku blinks and sits up slowly, wincing momentarily when his ribs shift. He’d bruised them, and Recovery Girl had healed them, but even so, to say he’s sore would be an understatement.

Recovery Girl already gave him the “okay” to leave; she let him rest for a while, since her Quirk uses a person’s stamina to heal injuries, but now, he’s ready to head home. He wonders if his mother was contacted about what happened earlier. He hopes not.

He slides off the bed and onto his feet, wincing again. It’s not as bad as it could be, though, and he takes that as a good thing. With a slight heaviness in his chest, he crosses the room, pulls the door open, and steps out into the hallway.

“--hope he’s alright, that was pretty brutal.”

“Yes, indeed. We’ll see him tomorrow, though, I’m sure of it.”

“I hope he’s okay. It was...it was scary.”

And Iida, Kirishima, and Uraraka walk right past him, talking to each other, not even giving him a glance. Izuku watches them walk; Uraraka’s head is down, as is Kirishima’s, and Iida looks more serious than usual, if that’s possible.

Izuku stares, confused, for a long moment.

“Well, I hope he comes to school tomorrow,” Kirishima says (They’re talking about me, Izuku thinks). “As long as he’s not seriously hurt…”

“I’m fine,” Izuku says.

Kirishima, Iida, and Uraraka let out a short, high-pitched shriek in unison and whirl around to stare at him, the concern chased away by terror.

“MIDORIYA!?”

“DEKU!?”

Izuku winces. “Sorry,” he says quickly. “I-I didn’t mean to scare you guys…”

He really, really needs to stop doing that to people...

“Dude, you’re okay, though!” Kirishima says, grinning. “Or…” He stops, his smile melting into concern. “Or...I think you’re okay…?”

Izuku knows how he looks--his eyes are probably still red from crying earlier, and his arm and head are wrapped with gauze; his other arm hangs in a sling.  Regardless, though, he smiles, although shakily.

“I’m fine,” he says. “Recovery Girl patched me up, so…”

Unsurprisingly, they don’t seem convinced. “You weren’t seriously hurt, were you, Deku?” Uraraka’s voice shakes, just a little. “I-I’m so sorry I wasn’t there, I could’ve helped you--”

“N-No, it’s fine,” Izuku says at once, holding a hand out to her. “It’s not your fault, I told you to leave. It’s because of you the fight ended as soon as it did. Thank you.”

Uraraka bites her lip, but nods. “I’m glad you’re okay, Deku…”

“Hold on…” Kirishima’s eyes widen, just for a second, like he’s come to a sudden realization. “Midoriya, wait here,” he says, very seriously. “I’ll be right back.”

And, without another word elsewise, he takes off full-speed down the hallway.

“DON’T RUN!” Iida hollers after him, but Kirishima doesn’t listen, spinning and disappearing around the corner. Iida sighs, but says nothing else on the matter, rather turning back towards Izuku.

“I’m glad you’re alright,” Iida says. “However, I’m quite surprised by Bakugou’s behavior. I don’t see how any aspiring hero could behave like he did…”

“D-Did...d-did he get in trouble?” Izuku asks, genuinely curious--and a little scared, too.

“Yes.” Iida’s answer comes the moment Izuku stops speaking. “Aizawa-sensei pulled him aside for a long talk. He was sent home for the remainder of the day with a note for his parents, and starting tomorrow, he’s on probation.”

Izuku actually feels a little relief at that, and it makes him kind of sad that he does.

“How do you feel, Deku?” Uraraka asks, wringing her hands together. She’s looking at his arm, bandaged and slinged.

“I’m…sore,” Izuku answers. “And...tired, but, honestly...okay.”

“Yes, that makes sense,” Iida says, nodding. “We were just getting ready to head home. We assumed you’d already left, but...it seems we were wrong.”

“I’m glad you’re okay.” Uraraka smiles at him, if just a bit. “Are you...are you going to come to school tomorrow, or…?”

“Recovery Girl said I’ll be fine by then,” Izuku replies. “She kickstarted the healing, so my bones should be okay by tomorrow morning.”

“That’s good--”

“I’M BACK!” Kirishima’s voice echoes down the hall, and Izuku, Iida, and Uraraka turn. Kirishima sprints across the hallway to them, then stops, resting his hands on his knees and gasping for breath.

“WHY ARE YOU RUNNING!?” Iida questions immediately. “IT’S DANGEROUS, DON’T YOU REALIZE THAT!?”

“Y-Yeah, yeah, sure,” Kirishima gasps, then straightens up. “A-Anyway, Midoriya--”

“DON’T CHANGE THE SUBJECT!”

“--Here, this is for you.”

He pulls something out of his pocket and hands it to Izuku. Izuku takes it into his hands and stares at it for a long, long moment--Uraraka and Iida crowd around to take a look.

It’s a bell.

A small, golden bell, attached to a black choker necklace.

“It’s, ahhhh...just so we know you’re there,” Kirishima explains, rubbing the back of his neck. “We passed Yaoyorozu a little while ago, and getting scared by you a second ago gave me the idea. I asked if she could make one, and...” He gestures vaguely at the bell.

“That’s…” Uraraka pauses, and doesn’t continue.

“Yeah,” Kirishima goes on, this time looking at Izuku. “No offense, buddy, but you’ve got absolutely no presence. It’s kinda scary, actually.”  

“Oh.” Izuku looks down at his shoes. “...Sorry, I--”

“Don’t look so dejected, man, it’s cool,” Kirishima says, knocking him on the shoulder hard enough to make him lose his footing, but not his balance. “Everyone’s different.”

Izuku bites his lip, then raises his head. “You might even say,” he says, “we all have our own little quirks.”

Silence.

“HA!” Kirishima slaps a hand to his head and cackles; Iida groans and buries his face in his hands, and Uraraka pats him on the shoulder comfortingly. “All Might wasn’t kidding, then!” Kirishima whoops. “You do like jokes! That’s, um...” Kirishima pauses and smiles embarrassedly. “...The bell thing was supposed to be a joke, kinda…”

Iida looks up and lets out a long sigh. “Kirishima,” he says, “I know you’re trying to help, but don’t you think a bell is rather degradin--”

“I like it!” Izuku cuts in suddenly, and everyone jumps collectively. “E-Even though it was kind of a joke, I-I actually really like it!”

Iida looks absolutely done with him. “Are you serious, Midoriya--”

“I-I mean, practically, it’ll keep me from accidentally sneaking up on people,” Izuku goes on, and Iida buries his head in his hands for a moment, “a-and, also…”

It’s the first time I’ve been given a gift from a friend.

“I think it’s cool!” Izuku says instead.

“Hey, awesome!” Kirishima gives him a thumbs-up. “It was totally a joke at first, but if you like it, I mean, wear it!”

Izuku nods, and Uraraka helps him put it on, snapping it behind his neck, and Izuku is surprised by how perfectly it fits him. He beams, and after a moment or two, his friends (Iida included, even though the smile seems forced), beam back at him.

He walks home with the three of them, and while he does, he thinks of how refreshingly wonderful it is to have friends.

Chapter Text

Izuku bumps into Bakugou on his way to class the next day.

On instinct, he tenses, planting his feet firmly on the ground. Bakugou glares at him, but doesn’t say anything for a time. And then,

“Nice bell,” he snarks.

Izuku swallows hard, but doesn’t back down. Not this time. Bakugou is on probation, he won’t try anything if he knows what’s good for him. And if he does try anything, he’ll have to answer to Aizawa.

“Thanks,” Izuku says, absentmindedly running his thumb along the smooth metal of the bell. “I got it from a friend.”

Bakugou’s glare darkens, but he doesn’t say anything else. Izuku waits until Bakugou disappears down the hallway before continuing to Class 1-A.

He takes the empty desk in front of Iida, and almost as soon as he sets his backpack on the floor beside his chair, the door slides open again, and in walks Aizawa.

There’s no “good morning,” and Izuku doesn’t think there ever will be. Aizawa doesn’t strike him as much of a morning person. (Or, for that matter, an any time of day person.)

Aizawa stacks a few papers on the desk and sets them aside. Izuku sits, straight-backed, and waits for him to begin.

Aizawa raises his head towards the class. “Before we get into today’s lessons, you’ll need to decide on a class representative.”

Izuku blinks. So do the rest of his classmates.

And then, all at once, everyone breaks into rounds of cheers and whoops and yays, and Izuku cups his hands around his ears to block out what noise he can.

For once…and, possibly, only for once…

...It’s actually a normal school activity.

They decide to take votes to nominate their class rep; it was Iida’s idea to begin with, and they all wrote their names out on the chalkboard and gathered up the votes. Voting like this is probably the best way to go about it; most everyone wants to be class rep, so whoever has more than one vote is obviously the most suited for it.

The most suited for class representative… Izuku thinks, then smiles. Well...the answer is obvious who I’m going to vote for, then...

Three votes.  

Izuku has three votes.

And none of them are his own.

For a while, he stares at the tally marks on the chalkboard beside his name.

Who the heck…?

He turns in shock to face the rest of the class. Kirishima is whistling and twirling a finger around a spike of hair absentmindedly; Uraraka is fiddling with a pencil; Iida straightens his glasses and doesn’t meet Izuku’s eyes.

...OH DAGNABBIT YOU GUYS.

“Well, that settles it, then,” Aizawa says. “Midoriya is class president, and Yaoyorozu, with two votes, is vice president.”

Izuku takes in a deep, deep breath and tries not to scream.

“Y-You guys shouldn’t have voted for me,” Izuku says over lunch at the cafeteria; he, Iida, Uraraka and Kirishima are sharing a table. “I’m...I’m not suited to be a leader.”

“C’mon, dude, that ain’t for you to decide.” Kirishima points his chopsticks at Izuku with a grin. “Let your followers determine how good or bad of a leader you are.”

“B-Believe me, I-I’m not a leader,” Izuku insists, shaking his head. “I can’t even stand up in front of people without getting jittery, how am I supposed to... be the class representative?”

“Oh.” Kirishima frowns. “Well, you should’ve thought of that sooner. You know you have to give the opening speech at the annual Sports Festival, don’t you?”

One of Izuku’s chopsticks snap between his fingers. “I have to what.”

“You came first in the entrance exam, Midoriya,” says Iida simply, though he seems confused. “That means you make the opening speech for the first year round at the Sports Festival. Did you...not know that?”

Izuku knew it, he’d just never thought about it. “That’s it, I’m dead,” he says, and he has half a mind to slide out of his chair--and his body, too, actually. “I’m dead. This is the end…”

Kirishima laughs.

Izuku stares at him. “It’s not funny,” he says.

“You’re gonna do fine!” Uraraka says, beaming at him. “It’s gonna ge great, just give a nice little encouragement to everyone!”

Izuku looks at her. “Do you...understand... how much I don’t want to do that?”

Kirishima laughs harder.

“You guys, I’m serious,” Izuku says--and then, and he hates himself for it, he adds, “I’m dead. This is a grave situation.”

Kirishima actually falls back out of his chair, cackling madly; a couple students from other tables turn to look in confusion, then go right back to what they’re doing when they’re sure no one’s dying.

“Oh, man, Midoriya, you’re a crack up,” Kirishima says, dragging himself off the floor and back into his seat. “Just say one of your dumb jokes at the opening speech, I’m sure everyone will love ya.”

“Or want to kill me,” Izuku says.

“You can’t kill someone if they’re already dead,” Kirishima says, and for a second, Izuku is off-put by the comment; then he remembers that he’d declared himself “dead” a moment ago. “Seriously though, Midoriya, don’t stress it. You’re gonna be fine.”

“I-I’m...not sure I will,” Izuku says, “but thank you.”

“That reminds me.” Uraraka taps a finger to her chin. “Deku, you had three votes, right? One from me, one from Iida, and one from Kirishima, right?”

Izuku nods, as do Iida and Kirishima.

“So, wait.” Uraraka blinks at him in curiosity. “Who did you vote for, Deku?”

“O-Oh, I voted for Iida,” Izuku answers. “I-I thought, y’know...he just seemed like the right person to me…”

Iida stares at him--and then, he raises a hand over his heart. “I’m honored you think I’m fit to lead the class, Midoriya,” Iida says. “However, I voted for you for the exact same reason. You’re going to be an excellent class representative.”

“Y-Yeah…” Izuku isn’t convinced at all. He stares at his broken chopstick sadly. “M-Maybe I--”

Something hits him suddenly, like a wave, and he stops, lurching forward just a bit. That feeling...it’s a tug at his chest, not unlike the feeling he gets when his spirits longs to be free, except--except it feels wrong. Like something is wrong.

“Midoriya?” Iida frowns at him. “Midoriya. Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” Izuku says, shaking his head, “just...had a funny feeling, for some reason--”

A loud, whirring siren blares overhead, cutting him off, and he and his friends turn.

“The alarm…?” Kirishima breathes. “Wait, does that mean…?” His eyes find Izuku’s. “What were you saying about a funny feeling?”

Izuku’s eyes are wide. “I have no idea.”

“It doesn’t matter now!” Iida gets to his feet, more serious than ever. “We’re under attack. Everyone, let’s move!”

Izuku, Kirishima and Uraraka get to their feet and follow him as he races from the cafeteria.  

They aren’t under attack.

Somehow, a pushy news reporter managed to cross over U.A.’s protective boarder, successfully triggering the alarm. Izuku is glad that’s all it was, but at the same time, he feels an odd sense of...foreboding. Like there’s more to this “mishap” than what meets the eye.

He doesn’t comment, though. He doesn’t see a point. When the incident is resolved and the students finally calm down (a lot of this is due to a stunt Iida pulled in the hallway at the cafeteria), Izuku and his classmates return to Class 1-A.

“Aizawa-sensei?”

Aizawa turns to him. He’s bundled in his sleeping bag in the corner of the room. “What is it, Midoriya?”

“Can I make an announcement real quick?”

Aizawa shrugs. “You’re the class rep, do what you want,” he says. “Just keep it short.”

Izuku nods, thanks him, then steps up behind the desk to face his classmates. They watch him, waiting; Kirishima gives him two thumbs-up in the seat behind Bakugou, and Uraraka beams and waves at him encouragingly.

Izuku takes in a breath.

“I’ve been thinking about this for a little while now,” Izuku says, “and I think Iida should be the class representative instead.”

He hears a collective gasp--a particularly loud one from Iida--but goes on anyway.

“D-Don’t get me wrong, I-I’m...I’m honored to be the class rep,” Izuku says, fiddling restlessly, “but...I-I’m not suited for it. Earlier today, when everyone else was panicking, Iida was able to keep a level-head and calm everyone down. I think that’s a really important thing to be able to do, as a class rep, and me, well…” He pauses and laughs shakily, rubbing the back of his neck.

“...I can be kiiiind of a basketcase.”

This earns a laugh or two from his classmates, and he smiles.

“Well, I don’t have any complaints!” Kaminari says, giving Iida a thumbs-up. “You go, Emergency Exit!”

“Whoo, Iida!”

“Nice goin’, man!”

Iida takes in a breath, then rises to his feet. “Well,” he says, straightening his glasses, “if the class rep nominated me, then who am I to refuse?” He thrusts his hand into the air above his head dramatically and shouts: “Class 1-A! I, Iida Tenya, as class representative, will guide and protect all of you to the best of my abilities!”

“Yeah!”

“Whoop, whoop!”

“Yay!”

“Nice going, Iida!”

“Whoo, Emergency Exit!”

Iida meets Izuku’s eyes and smiles. Izuku beams back at him.

“Ahhh, man, I’m so excited!” Kirishima is saying; they’re on a bus a little later on that same day, heading towards an off-campus training grounds. “Fighting and stuff is great, but rescuing people is really what being a hero’s all about! I can’t wait!”

“I wonder where we’re training,” Asui (no, Tsuyu, she always insists on being called Tsuyu) says absentmindedly, tapping a finger to her chin in thought. “I know it’s off-campus, but is that all we know?”

“It’s gotta be a huge facility, whatever it is,” says Kaminari; they hit a bump in the road, and everyone scrambles to stay in their seats for a moment or two.

“We’ve been driving for a while now,” Ashido moans, looking out the window; city streets and buildings zip by around them. “How much longer?”

“Stop whining,” Aizawa cuts in; he’s sitting, arms crossed, in the passenger seat. “We’re still in the city, so we have a long way to go. Stay in your seats.”

Ashido slumps back into her seat like she’s told, but she doesn’t seem happy about it at all.

“Hey, think about it this way!” says Hagakure, her gloves and shoes the only thing the others can see of her. “We have more time to talk and get to know each other now!”

They hit another pothole, and Izuku finds himself thinking they can’t leave the city fast enough. He looks out the window absentmindedly; there’s a dark tunnel farther up ahead, cars and trucks zipping by.

“Well, there isn’t much to talk about, really,” says Kirishima. “I mean, we could talk about our Quirks, but for the most part, we saw all that during training yesterday.”

“That reminds me,” says Kaminari, turning towards Izuku. “You came first in the entrance exam, didn’t you? How’d you manage that if you break your bones whenever you use your Quirk?”

“O-Oh.” Izuku looks away, twiddling his thumbs. “I-I--”

The bus zooms under the tunnel, and they’re engulfed in darkness.

Immediately, everyone starts screaming.

“HOLY FRICK--”

“WHAT IN THE--”

“OH MY GOSH--”

(There’s a clash and a clatter in the darkness.)

“I DIDN’T KNOW YOU COULD--”

“WHAT IS THAT!?”

“HOW DO--”

The darkness vanishes as the bus leaves the tunnel behind them, and Izuku winces at his classmates. Ashido and Hagakure are on top of each other (he thinks, it’s hard to tell when one of them is invisible), and Sero is on the floor. The rest of them are staring at Izuku in shock.

“W-What happened?” Izuku asks; in the back of his mind he’s thinking, what did I do, what did I do, what did I--

“Dude!” Kaminari exclaims. “I didn’t know your eyes did that!”

“M-My eyes did what…?”

“Glow in the dark!” Sero cuts in, bouncing to his feet. “Did you know they did that, Midoriya!?”

Oh. Oh. That’s okay, then. He can brush this off.

“Um, y-yeah,” Izuku answers, “I-I always knew they did, I-I just...usually they’re pretty faint…?”

“They weren’t ‘pretty faint’ a second ago!” Kaminari says. He actually looks impressed now, not terrified, which Izuku assumes is a good thing. “That’s pretty cool, dude! Is it part of your Quirk? Or, like, some kind of a mutation, like Ashido’s skin?”

Huh. Izuku’s never thought of his glowing eyes as a part of a mutation. “M-Maybe?” he says. “I never really thought about it before…”

The conversation shifts from Izuku’s eyes to mutations in general, with the class discussing their own Quirks and “quirks,” and Izuku is glad to be out of the spotlight.

It’d been a close call, though, Kaminari asking him how he came first in the entrance exam.

I’ll have to tell them eventually, Izuku thinks, turning towards the window again; they’re speeding onwards, out of the city towards their destination. It’d probably be best if I did it before they find out on their own…

His friends’ conversations fade out of his ears, and Izuku watches the world pass by out the window.

The facility is huge.

It’s a dome-shaped building located a considerable distance from the city. It isn’t really “out in the middle of nowhere,” but it cuts it rather close. Izuku follows Aizawa and his classmates inside the building for their Search and Rescue lesson, and all the while, all he can think about is Kaminari’s question on the bus. It leaves a bitter taste in his mouth.

He shakes his head. Focus, he tells himself. Focus. There’ll be a time and a place to think about that later. Right now...focus on the task at hand.

All Might isn’t here.

He’s supposed to be, Izuku knows--Aizawa had told them all earlier--but he isn’t.

Aizawa notices, too, and he approaches the only other hero in the facility--the Rescue Hero, Thirteen, known for their work in natural disasters.

“Thirteen,” Aizawa says, “where is All Might? He did say he’d be here, didn’t he?”

“About that…” Thirteen turns to him, holds up three fingers. “He won’t be joining us today, unfortunately. Ran into some trouble earlier.”

Three fingers. Three hours. All Might’s time limit.

Aizawa shrugs. “Well, it can’t be helped, then,” he says. “Take it away, Thirteen.”

“Gladly.” Thirteen turns away from Aizawa and steps towards the students. “Everyone,” Thirteen says, “I’m glad you are all here. The most important part of being a hero is not what villains you can fight and defeat, but rather, what people you save. With this training grounds, I mimicked several natural disasters--floods, rockslides, shipwrecks, the likes. I call this facility…”

Thirteen pauses dramatically.

“The Unforeseen Stimulation Joint,” Thirteen says, “or USJ for short!”

“Holy crap,” Kirishima whispers, eyes wide. “It’s literally Universal Studios Japan.”

Iida elbows him; Kirishima yelps and holds his side.

“Everyone,” Thirteen goes on, ignoring Kirishima, “you’ve only been students for a few days now, but already, you’ve learned so much about yourselves and your abilities. In Aizawa’s Quirk Apprehension test, you learned the heights and limits of your power. In All Might’s battle training, you learned what it feels like to use that power on other people.”

Izuku catches Bakugou glaring at him for just a brief, brief moment.

“...And now, all of you, as students, people, and aspiring heroes,” Thirteen continues, “...I hope you leave here today with the knowledge of how you can use your powers to save others.”

There’s a beat, filled with gasps of awe and bright smiles. “BRAVO!” Iida claps his hands over his head. “BRAVO, THIRTEEN!” The others clap and cheer along with him, and Thirteen takes a bow.

That’s kind of like what All Might said yesterday, Izuku thinks, his mentor’s words echoing through his head. I wonder…

He looks down at his hands.

...Can I actually use my power to--?

And then, there’s a yank at his chest. It’s not a physical yank, merely a feeling, but it’s there and it’s dangerous and suddenly a feeling of dread washes over him, like it did earlier in the cafeteria only this time it’s worse, it’s so much worse, it’s so much more real--

“Aizawa-sensei--!”

Izuku lurches forward, and his fingers curl around his teacher’s wrist. Aizawa turns to look at him, and slowly, his eyes widen. Izuku wonders what kind of face he’s wearing, how panicked he looks, but he puts it out of his mind.  

“Something’s wrong,” Izuku says, and he’s almost overwhelmed by that horrible, drowning feeling. “Something’s wrong, Sensei, something’s--”

On cue, the lightbulbs surrounding the dome of the building flicker and go out. Izuku’s heart squeezes in his chest, the feeling worse than ever. The students have stopped cheering; they’re staring at a fountain in the middle of the facility, and Izuku follows their gazes.

There’s…

...There’s something there. A black, gaping something, a swirling abyss of nothingness, like a black hole.

“Are we already starting…?” Kirishima asks. He sounds curious, but there’s no hint of worry in his voice whatsoever. He doesn’t know. He has no idea what’s going on.

Izuku feels like he’s going to be sick. The abyss stretches until it reaches the sides of the facility; and then, from its gaping nothingness march--

No.

Izuku has to hold down his spirit to keep it in his body. It isn’t easy. Not when every instinct of his is screaming run, get away, it’s not safe here, it’s dangerous, run, run, you’ll die, they’ll kill you, you’ll die--

There are dozens of them. Literal dozens of them, marching from the black abyss with a confidence Izuku didn’t know existed in this world.

Villains.

They’re villains.

Two of them--one covered in detached hands, and another taller, bulkier one that looks more animal than human--hang back, but the rest of them, the dozens of them, plunge forward.

“Stay back!” Aizawa snaps immediately, and Izuku and the others jump. “Thirteen, protect the students!”

Without another word elsewise, Aizawa runs, leaps, and charges at the villains.

Believe in him, Izuku tells himself, even as he’s grinding his teeth and clenching and unclenching his hands at his sides. Believe in him. He’s strong. He’ll be okay. He’ll make it.

“Everyone, run!” Thirteen says, ushering the group in the direction of the doors. “Make for the exit, hurry--!”

The abyss of black swirls in front of them, between them and the one exit, and Izuku screeches to a halt, his knees shaking so badly he’s in danger of toppling over.

“Hmm…” The villain studies the group for a long moment, eyes yellow and glowing within the abyss. “This is odd. I do believe All Might was supposed to be here. Is he not? Is it possible...that our information was flawed?”

Information? Flawed? Izuku’s mind is ticking like a bomb. What does that--

“No matter,” the villain continues, the abyss stretching and growing. “I still have my duty.”

They’re engulfed by the mist. To his left, Izuku sees Uraraka scream, hands in front of her face to shield herself; to his right, Izuku watches Iida tackle Shouji and Sero to the ground, successfully knocking them out of harm’s way.

Izuku tries to move, tries to get to Uraraka. His eyes are full of darkness, and he can only make out her frame beyond the mist. He hears her scream.

My body won’t--

He’s frozen. His legs won’t move.

--Crap, at a time like this--!

And then he remembers he isn’t a prisoner of his own body.

Literally.

He grits his teeth. He hears screams and shouts around him, and he feels a real tug on his physical body, but not on his spirit. His spirit can do whatever the hell it wants.

He dissociates and makes a dive for Uraraka. He reaches her the moment his body crumples to the floor.

He concentrates all his thoughts on his hands and shoves, pushing her back. She shrieks again, this time in surprise, but she’s out of the mist now. She’s out of the danger. Izuku takes in a breath (or, what he supposes is reminiscent of a breath, considering ghosts don’t breathe) of relief, then turns.

The abyss of black is gone, and so are three quarters of Izuku’s classmates.

(And his own body, too, but he’s more worried about his missing classmates.)

It must be some kind of a warp gate, Izuku thinks, teeth gritted behind his lips. Which means...this isn’t good…

“Everyone’s still in the facility!” Shouji says, one of his appendages stretched into the air above his head. “They’re scattered, but they’re all still here.”

There’s a collective sigh of relief from the remaining students--Izuku included--and Thirteen.

The mist villain has gathered back into one spot, blocking the double doors leading outside. “You cannot win this one,” the villain says. “You may have avoided getting scattered by my gate, but we will win the war. We have brought with us a weapon...capable of killing All Might.”

Izuku’s heart leaps into his throat--or, whatever his “heart” is as a ghost, he isn’t quite sure that kind of terminology applies to him right now.

They have a way…

...To kill All Might?

Izuku glances over the villain’s shoulder at the metal, sliding doors. The easiest thing to do here is phase through the walls and go to get help, but...he can only move as a ghost as fast as he can physically run, and while his ghost doesn’t feel exhaustion or fatigue or shortness of breath, he’d never make it in time.

But…

He looks around. His eyes land on one person in particular.

...Iida can.

This isn’t how he wants to reveal his first Quirk to his friends, never in a million years, especially so soon after meeting them, before they can establish trust.

But, even if they hate him after the truth comes out, even if they think he’s a monster…

...That’s better than watching them die.

Tenya’s mind is racing. He doesn’t know where the rest of the class is, but they’re here, in this facility, which means that they’re safe for now. They aren’t off somewhere held captive by villains; they’re here and they’re safe (for now) and they can be saved.

Tenya grits his teeth, staring at the villain and trying to think of just how to counter him. The door is right there, so painstakingly, tauntingly close, but at the same time, to get there means to face the villain head-on, and Tenya doesn’t think he can do that. He knows it’s unwise to try.

“Iida.”

Tenya jumps; the voice comes from right beside him, but there’s nothing there. Just blank, empty space.

“Iida, listen.”

Tenya tenses. Now that he thinks about it...he knows that voice. He knows the person behind the voice.  

“Midoriya?” he says, matching the low, quiet tone of his friend. The warp-gate villain doesn’t seem to hear them, which is good; he’s not meant to.

“Yeah, it’s me,” Midoriya says. His voice sounds strained and hollow. “I-I’m sorry, Iida, I-I…”

Tenya looks around for a moment, but all he sees is blank, empty space. “Midoriya, where are you?” Tenya whispers harshly. “What’s going on? What... what are you doing?”

Something clutches his wrist suddenly. It’s cold. “There’s a reason I came first in the entrance exam,” Midoriya’s voice hisses, and unwillingly, chills go down Tenya’s spine. It’s Midoriya, yes, he knows it’s Midoriya, but...his voice sounds... icy. Cold. Not angry or furious, just cold.

And maybe a little bit dangerous.

“Iida, listen to me.” Midoriya’s voice brings Tenya back to the present, and he nods, listening. “If I give you an opening...can you run and get help?”

Tenya’s head snaps towards Midoriya’s direction. It’s still just blank, empty space.

“Midoriya, you can’t--you can’t expect me to leave everyone,” Tenya says. “If I escape alone, without anyone else--”

The coldness sinks into his wrist further, and it’s only now that Tenya realizes Midoriya must be squeezing him. “If you escape alone,” Midoriya says, “and go get help right now, you’re going to save us.”

Tenya grits his teeth. “Midoriya--”

“Do it, Iida.”

He really, really does not like the tone of Midoriya’s voice, and he finds himself thinking, is this really Midoriya? Is this really him?

“Iida, please, you have to.” The voice is still hollow and dangerous, but now there’s desperation there, too. This is definitely Midoriya. That tone gives it away. “You have to go, Iida. I know you hate it. I-I know...I know how much it sucks, but s-sometimes…”  

There’s a beat. When Midoriya’s voice comes back, it’s thick and choked. Like he’s crying.

“S-Sometimes...even though you hate it...running is all you can do.”

Tenya grinds his teeth together.

“Midoriya,” he says, “I have...absolutely no idea what’s going on...”

“That’s fair.”

“...But I trust you,” Iida finishes. “I’ll be back soon. I won’t let you down, I won’t let any of you down. Please, Midoriya, if you can, please...keep everyone safe. Just while I’m gone. I’ll be back soon.”

Midoriya’s cold, invisible, not-quite-real fingers squeeze his forearm. “Don’t worry,” Midoriya says, in a voice still hollow and low, but determined. “I’m going to protect them, all of them. I promise you, no one is going to die today.”

Chapter Text

Izuku knows he’s running out of time.

For the past thirty seconds, he’s felt a tug and a pull at his spirit, and he wonders where his body actually ended up. Is it drowning? Is it burning? He assumes it’s drowning; the sensation is all too familiar to him, after being nearly drowned by the sludge villain what seems so long ago.

I have to hurry, he thinks, the tug stronger than ever. If I don’t hurry--

And then, it stops. The tug and pull and suffocating yanking of his spirit stop, and he finally has some breathing room (“breathing room,” even though that term doesn’t really work considering ghosts don’t breathe).

It doesn’t take Izuku very long before he realizes what’s happened.

...Someone…

...Someone saved me.

That’s the only thing that makes sense. He doesn’t think his body died; he’s never actually thought about what would happen if his body died without his spirit in it, but he assumes it isn’t good. He believes that he isn’t dead, and he believes that somewhere, wherever his body is, one of his classmates saved him.

He raises his head towards the threat at hand. The warp gate villain is lording over them, confident, like he has all the time in the world, and Izuku narrows his eyes.

I’ve never used Dissociation to fight before, Izuku thinks, sinking his teeth into his lip. The only time I ever tried was when I was attacked by the sludge villain, but it didn’t work because his body wasn’t solid. I wonder…

“Now then,” says the villain, rising to an even greater height. “Our objective here was to kill All Might, but as he isn’t here, it seems that isn’t possible. However...what better way to wound the Symbol of Peace...than to kill the students he’s sworn to protect?”

It’s odd, Izuku thinks. Being a ghost. Izuku feels fear, but it’s different than the fear he feels as a person in his own body. He doesn’t feel pain, and even though he can feel emotions, like fear and anger and sorrow, he can’t fully click with them. He can’t feel the extent of them.

However, right now, faced with this…

...Maybe that’s a good thing.  

If I concentrate…

Izuku shuts his eyes, focusing all his will into his hands, arms, feet and legs. Interacting with the physical world always has backlash on his body, and he knows this, but he’ll take backlash to losing his friends any day.

...Can I actually fight with this power?

He slides up to Iida again. “Iida,” he whispers, as loudly as he dares, “are you ready?”

He doesn’t want to imagine how confused Iida must be, but his friend doesn’t question anything. Yet.

Iida nods. “Ready when you are, Midoriya.”

Izuku shuts his eyes, summons his will, then opens them again.

Let’s go.

A part of Tenya wants to laugh at the absurdity of this situation, but most of him really just wants to scream. He’s leaving his classmates behind, all nineteen of them, and not just that, but he’s leaving them behind as the class representative, when he’d just promised them this morning that he’d protect them all no matter what.

But he can’t argue with Midoriya. Not when he uses a tone like that.

“I’ll give you an opening,” Midoriya is saying; the cold has disappeared from Tenya’s forearm, and a part of him feels empty without it. Midoriya’s nothing more than a voice in blank, empty space now. “When the doors open, book it. Don’t think about it, don’t think about us, don’t look back, just... run.”

Tenya wants to argue, but doesn’t. He nods. “Alright,” he says. “I won’t let you down, I swear it.”

“I know you won’t.” He can hear a smile in Midoriya’s voice, but it’s definitely shaky and definitely fake. “You go, Emergency Exit.”

Tenya feels something--a rush of air beside him, small and cold but there-- and then it’s gone. Midoriya is gone.  

Midoriya… Tenya grits his teeth. Whatever you do, don’t do anything crazy, please...

A deep chuckle brings Tenya back to the villain before them, and he turns, fists clenching and unclenching at his sides.

“Foolish children,” the villain says, rising to a greater height and towering over them. His voice is almost refreshing compared to Midoriya’s, and Tenya is angry at himself for thinking so. “You cannot defeat us, and trying is--”

He stops abruptly and lurches forward, his bright, yellow eyes going wider. Tenya and the others stare, shock slowly replacing horror.

“What…?” The villain says exactly what Tenya is thinking, and he raises his head. There’s a beat; and then, he stops again, this time shuddering back.

“What the hell?” Sero whispers, eyes wide. “What’s going on…?”

Midoriya, Tenya thinks, torn between horror and relief. It’s Midoriya. It has to be Midoriya.

The villain’s bright, glowing eyes search the students. “Which one of you is doing that?” he asks. “What are you doing? Stop that--” He shudders back again, shaking his head back and forth. “I said stop that…”

“A-Am I the only one who’s confused by this,” Ashido murmurs, “o-or...or are we all lost?”

“I don’t know what’s going on, either,” Uraraka murmurs back, teeth gritted, eyes wide. They’re scared, they’re all scared--and Tenya thinks, maybe, he should be a bit more scared himself.

But he isn’t. He knows it’s Midoriya, and if anyone can buy them time, it’s him. Midoriya Izuku, the boy who came first in the U.A. entrance exam, beating out even powerhouses like Bakugou.

The villain turns back to them. He isn’t happy. “This is not a game,” the villain tells them gravely. “Your lives are on the line, do you really--”

There’s a clang, and the villain goes flying.

Uraraka, Ashido, Sero and Shouji leap backwards in shock; the villain doesn’t go flying very far, a fair few feet up and away, but it’s enough to give the students a moment to breathe.

“What was that?” the villain’s voice rings, curious. He swirls in front of the door again and shakes himself for just a moment. “Whichever one of you is doing that, if you value your life, I’d advise you to stop--”

“Funny thing about that, actually…”  

It’s Midoriya’s voice again, cold and icy but definitely him. There’s another clang, like something slamming against metal, and the villain goes flying again. The students don’t flinch this time, just stare.  

“...I don’t value my life.”

Midoriya, Tenya thinks, fists balled at his sides. He has no idea what his friend is actually doing, but he knows it certainly can’t be anything smart. Are you insane?

“W-Wait a minute, w-was that…” Uraraka’s eyes are wide. “Was that Deku?”

No one answers the question; the villain was expecting the hit this time, and he regroups, his body swirling back into place again.

“This is getting tedious,” the villain says. “Please, whoever you are--”

There’s another clang, but he doesn’t go flying this time. It’s more of a knock, actually, like knuckles against metal--

“He has a physical body!”

It’s Midoriya’s voice again, and it’s desperate but authoritative. Like a captain commanding an army.

“He has a physical body! We can beat him, you guys, come on! I’ll cover you!”

The villain’s eyes narrow. “You little brat--”  

Uraraka is the first to react, running forward. Her eyes are narrowed now, and her balled fists swing back and forth at her sides. “I don’t know what’s going on, Deku,” she says, bringing her hands toward her chest and tapping her fingertips together, “but let’s do this!”

This knocks the rest of the students--Tenya included--out of their daze. They race forward, like-minded: Sero, Shouji, Tenya, Ashido...

“I’ll pin him down!” Sero says, flanking Uraraka and thrusting out his elbows. “C’mon, you guys! We can do this!”

“I’ll wait for an opening!” Thirteen shouts from behind them. “Everyone, be careful! Remember, when it comes down to it, saving your own life is equally important to saving the lives of the people around you!”

“Got it!” Uraraka hollers back, still running.

The mist villain shrinks back, but he doesn’t seem afraid. Merely fed up. “Please, stop this,” the villain says as the students charge. “Do you have death wishes--”

An invisible something (some one) slams into him. He flies backwards and hits the double doors back-first with a very audible clang of metal against metal.

“Why you--” The villain thrashes and struggles, but doesn’t move. “Let go of me.”

Nothing changes, though. He’s pinned there, unable to move, and Tenya sees what Midoriya meant now; the villain does have a physical body, shrouded by mist but completely obvious now. He’s being pinned by his physical body to the double doors behind him.

It’s Midoriya, Tenya thinks again, and he wonders how many times he’s thought that in the past five minutes. It’s Midoriya.

And Tenya finds himself wondering just what the hell kind of person he’s friends with. He finds himself realizing just why Midoriya came first in the entrance exam.

“URARAKA, NOW!” It’s Midoriya’s voice again, desperate, strained--it’s definitely him pinning the villain to the wall, then.

Uraraka runs towards the scene. She shivers when she gets close, and her eyes go wide for a moment, but she doesn’t falter. She presses her hand flat against the villain’s physical, metal body, then leaps backwards.

“Also, for the record!” Midoriya’s voice rings out again, and suddenly the villain is yanked away from the wall, not of his own accord. “If you die today--!”

Midoriya--invisible, what the hell Midoriya--swings the villain around and launches him up into the air.

“You will NOT be mist!”

A beat.

And then, Sero turns and runs in the direction opposite the door, swinging his tape around. “Was that a pun!?” he says, grinning. “You’re definitely Midoriya, then!” He sends a strip of tape into the air; it latches onto the villain’s body, and Sero yanks him further away from the door.

It doesn’t take much for the villain to break free, though, and then he’s swarming back, he’s coming back and he’s angry--

“Iida! Run!”

Tenya’s head snaps in that direction; the double doors are opening. Slowly, painstakingly slowly, but they’re opening.

“Go, Iida!” Shouji yells, and he leaps into the air as the mist villain comes back. His wing-like appendages close around the villain’s body and contain him. “Hurry! Hurry!”

It’s not what Tenya wants to do, but he does it anyway. His engines roar to life, and he makes a mad dash for the growing space between the double doors.

The space is barely big enough for him to squeeze through, but he does. As he passes, he runs through something cold, something there but not there, and he shivers involuntarily, but doesn’t stop.

It’s Midoriya, he thinks, and it’s reassuring. It’s Midoriya. It’s alright.

He breaks out of the USJ. Sunlight and fresh air have never felt so good.

At the last second, Tenya glances over his shoulder. He can’t see Midoriya, but he hears his friend’s voice, ringing through his ears like a chainsaw. A cold voice, an icy voice, an authoritative voice.

But also, a voice filled with relief. Midoriya’s voice.

“Run, Iida.”

The doors slam shut with a resounding clap, and Tenya does run. He focuses his attention on the road ahead of him and sprints, pouring every once of strength and energy into his Quirk. He knows he’s leaving his friends and classmates behind, but at the same time, Midoriya is with them.

Nervous laughs and socially anxious Midoriya.

Self-sacrificing, pun-loving Midoriya.

Silent, glowing-eyed Midoriya.

Cold, icy voice Midoriya.

Blank, empty space Midoriya.

Leading them into battle with the authority of a war hero Midoriya.

Midoriya’s words ring through his ears: “Don’t worry. I’m going to protect them, all of them. I promise you, no one is going to die today.”

Without meaning to, Tenya smiles to himself.

...You were so adamant that you weren’t a leader, but…

...Midoriya...

...You truly are incredible.

He speeds on, leaving the USJ behind him. He doesn’t look back once.

“Well.” The mist villain studies the group of students before him, the echo of the slamming door ringing through Ochako’s ears. “This is problematic. I did not mean to let one of you to escape--”

Thirteen steps forward, hand outstretched. “You made a mistake, attacking us!” the hero says; the small cap on the forefinger of their space suit opens, and a gaping black hole begins to swallow up the villain.

For a few seconds, it looks like it’s working.

And then, the villain begins to laugh.

“Thirteen,” he says calmly, as though he isn’t being swallowed up by a black hole. “Your work as a hero is outstanding. However...you are naive.”

“Turn it off!”

Ochako jumps; it’s Deku’s voice, but it doesn’t sound entirely like him. She knows it’s him, she knows it is, but at the same time--

“Thirteen, turn it off! Something’s wrong--!”

A warp gate opens at Thirteen’s back and channels Thirteen’s black hole there instead. Thirteen lets out a sound somewhere between a choke and a shriek--Ochako watches, frozen, as a part of the hero’s suit is torn off, sucked into abyss, and--

It stops abruptly.

The villain flinches back unexpectedly, closing the warp gate, and Thirteen falls to their knees, gasping for breath.

“Thirteen!” Ochako kneels beside the hero, hands hovering over them in concern. “T-Thirteen, are you--”

“I’m alright,” Thirteen says in a strained, pained voice. “It stopped in time. I’m...I’m alright. A few seconds more, though...”

Ochako swallows the lump in her throat and raises her head. She sees the villain, but she knows he isn’t the only person there.

Deku...what are you doing…?

The villain raises his head. “This has gone on long enough,” he says, towering over the students once again. “Which of you has the wind Quirk?”

“The wind Quirk? Huh.”

The villain turns towards the voice. So do Ochako and the others.

“I’m kind of insulted, to be honest.” It sounds like Deku, but... “Seriously, if that’s what you think of me...”

There’s a pause. A long, dramatic pause.

“... Wind did I go wrong?”

...No, this is definitely Deku. His voice shakes, though, and Ochako wonders if he’s just telling jokes now to try and ward away his own fear. She’s not sure how well it works for him, but it works for her. A little bit.

Maybe that’s part of it, too. Maybe he’s doing it, not just for himself, but for the rest of them. To keep their spirits raised in this time of terror.

“I don’t have time for this,” the mist villain says with a long, droning sigh. “I will be going now. I have other matters to attend to…”

He folds in on himself and vanishes within his own warp gate.

Across from her, Shouji scoffs. “So he takes off like a coward, then,” he says, rising to his feet. “Makes sense.”

“You guys!”

Ochako and those around her jump; the voice is so much closer now. Deku’s voice.

“Deku?” she calls, not really expecting an answer. She gets one, though; there’s something cold on her forearm, and when Deku’s voice comes back, it’s soft. Hollow and icy, but soft. Quiet.

“...Yeah. It’s me.”

“Dude, where?” Sero looks around, his eyes falling on the blank, empty space beside Ochako. “I mean, I can hear you, but…”

“It’s a lot to explain,” Deku says, and there’s a heaviness to his tone that wasn’t there before. “I’m sorry. But, the escape route is clear.”

At this, Ochako raises her head. He’s right; with the mist villain gone, their escape route is wide open. They can leave now.

Ochako...isn’t quite sure what to think about that. On one hand, they can leave--they can make a break for it and leave the villains and this nightmare behind them.

But...the villains don’t make up everyone they’ll be leaving behind...

Thirteen is unconscious now--not gravely injured, but unconscious. There’s a long while, a long gap of space before Deku speaks again.

“Uraraka, Ashido, Sero, Shouji...can you...c-can you help Thirteen out of the facility?”

Ochako’s head snaps up. “What?”

Deku doesn’t answer. Rather, he goes on: “As soon as you’re outside, try and get as far away from here as you can. Don’t look back, just...just move forward.”

“Wait, w-without you?” Ashido bounces up beside Ochako, eyes wide. “What about everyone else? The rest of the class? We can’t abandon--”

“I’ll make sure they’re safe.”

There’s something in Deku’s tone, something dangerous, that makes Ochako believe him instantly. She doesn’t even have to physically see him to know he’s right for a fact. The villains don’t stand a chance against someone with a voice like that.

“...Be careful,” Ochako says. “R-Remember what Thirteen said. You...you have to think about your own life, too, Deku.”

She does not like the silence that follows.

“...Yeah,” Deku says finally. “I’ll remember that.”

She doesn’t believe him. She has no reason to believe him. She opens her mouth to say something, but there’s a rush of something beside her--something cold, like wind, something there but not there.

And Deku’s gone.

She stands there for a moment.

And then, determined, she turns to the others. “You heard him,” she says--and doesn’t mention the fact that hearing him was all they did. “Let’s go.”

“This freaking sucks!” Ejirou elbows a villain in the face, Quirk activated; the villain hits the ground, unconscious, blood pouring from his nose. “We came here to learn how to save others, not save ourselves--!”

Bakugou fires off an explosion into another villain’s face. The villain is on the ground a second later, sprouting at least two degree burns. “They’re petty villains,” Bakugou snarls. “All of them.”

Ejirou turns. Around them are about seven villains in total, unconscious and wounded some way or another. “What do you mean?” Ejirou questions.

“They’re weak,” Bakugou snaps. “It’s like they were thrown into the whole ‘being a villain’ thing yesterday. Other than that warp-gate and the other two standing at the front, they’re barely even dangerous.”

Ejirou frowns. “I mean, okay,” he says. “So we should be fine? The others, too? You think they’re alright?”

“Like I’ve got a frickin’ clue,” Bakugou growls. “If they can’t fight off these loser villains, they shouldn’t be here in the first place.”

Ejirou pauses, taking in the unconscious villains around them. Bloodied, burned, broken bones…

“Yo, Bakugou,” Ejirou says, “why do you hate Midoriya?”

Bakugou whirls around so quick it’s almost frightening. “What the hell did you just say to me?”

“You heard me. Why do you hate Midoriya?”

Ejirou isn’t angry--okay, maybe he is, a little bit, when he thinks about the fact that Bakugou is treating these villains the same exact way he treated Midoriya during battle training--but he is curious. That’s something he won’t deny.

“Like, is there something he did to you that made you hate him?” Ejirou goes on when Bakugou doesn’t answer. “Is this some kind of a grudge?”

Bakugou glares at him. “Drop it, weird hair. The way I treat Deku is none of your frickin’ business.”

“I have a name,” Ejirou tells him. “And so does Midoriya. Also, what the hell makes you think this isn’t my business? Midoriya’s my friend, Bakugou, and as such, this has everything to do with me.”

“Shut up,” Bakugou snarls.

Ejirou puts up his hands. “I’m not trying to fight you,” he says. “Believe me, we have enough to deal with without fighting each other. But I’ve been thinking about this for a long time now, and--”

“Fricking drop it, Weird Hair.”  

“You really do hate Midoriya, don’t you?”

“I said drop it.”

“It’s like--wait.” Ejirou stops. His eyes go wide. “Bakugou, are you--are you scared of--”

“SHUT UP!” A blast goes right by Ejirou’s head, and he leaps to the side. Bakugou hadn’t been aiming for him, so of course it didn’t hit him, but still. It was enough to leave his ears ringing.

“Don’t bring it up again,” Bakugou snarls, and he turns and storms off.

Ejirou watches him go.

“That’s weird,” he mumbles to himself. “Why the heck would Bakugou be scared of him?”

He puts it out of his mind in favor of pursuing his classmate.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!”

“Be quiet, Mineta,” Tsuyu says, pressing two fingers against Midoriya’s neck. He’s breathing--he hadn’t drowned, thank goodness, she’d pulled him out of the water in time--but it’s faint, and she doesn’t trust it.

“He’s dead!” Mineta shrieks instead of listening, burying his hands in his hair(?). His eyes are wide with horror. “He’s dead he’s dead he’s dead he’s dead--!”

“He’s not dead,” Tsuyu says, and she says it as confirmation to herself, too. “He still has a pulse. It’s faint, but it’s there.”

It’s very faint, actually. Faint and sluggish. Tsuyu watches Midoriya’s chest rise and fall, shallowly but steadily, and tries not to freak out.

“Did you see him get injured?” Tsuyu asks Mineta.

“I didn’t see anything!” Mineta wails. “All I saw was that weird mist-villain’s fog! Oh, oh no, he’s dead--!”

Tsuyu ignores him in favor of looking for injuries on her friend. There’s no head wound, but he’s breathing too shallowly to just have fainted. There’s a problem here, definitely a problem, but...she can’t find anything.

If he isn’t unconscious, Tsuyu thinks, then what is this--

And then, Midoriya’s eyes snap open, and he knocks heads with her when he shoots upright.

Tsuyu flinches backwards, rubbing her head, but she’s too relieved to be upset.

“HE’S ALIVE!” Mineta cheers, rushing forward. “HE’S ALIVE!!”

“Midoriya,” Tsuyu says, disliking how pale he is, “are you alr--?”

Midoriya rolls over on his hands and knees and throws up.

Tsuyu reels back in surprise at first, but manages to keep a level-head; she wraps one arm around Midoriya’s waist to steady him and rubs his back between his shoulder blades.

Mineta is screaming again, which isn’t helping. “HE’S DYING, HE’S DYING, HE’S DYING--!”

Tsuyu turns to him for a brief moment. “Mineta.”

“YES!?”

“Shut up.”

Mineta doesn’t, though; he just screams again.

“I-I’m fine,” Midoriya rasps, sitting back; Tsuyu lets him go, but keeps a hand on his shoulder.

“You’re not fine,” Tsuyu argues immediately. “You were unconscious a second ago, and now you’re throwing up. Are you hurt?”

Midoriya is already shaking his head before she finishes speaking. “No, I’m not hurt,” he says, pushing himself to his feet; he staggers for a moment, but doesn’t fall. “I’m fine. Just got a little nauseous. Happens all the time.”

“But you were unconscious,” Tsuyu tells him. “Getting nauseous like that right after regaining consciousness is a bad sign, Midori-chan.”

“I wasn’t...unconscious, exactly,” Midoriya says. “It’s...it’s hard to explain, please, you just have to--”

Beneath them, the boat lurches; Mineta hits the deck, Tsuyu crouches, and Midoriya grabs the railing. His knuckles are white.

“We’re sinking,” Midoriya says, even though it’s obvious. He looks over the side of the ship, then blanches. “...How long have those villains been there?”

“Since we dragged you out of the water,” Tsuyu answers, filing to stand beside him. She takes a look at his face; pale, drawn, worried...nothing at all like himself. “Midori-chan, maybe you should sit down for a second. You look like you’re going to fall over.”

“There’s no time,” Midoriya says, turning towards her. “I’m fine, I promise.”

And that’s the problem--he is fine. There’s no sign of injury, no injury at all, and even though he’d been unconscious and puking just a second ago, he isn’t hurt.

Tsuyu doesn’t get it. It doesn’t make any sense.

“Alright,” Tsuyu says, even though she doesn’t like it. She sets herself in “business” mode and moves to stand beside Midoriya, overlooking the villain-infested waters below. “We should get out of here and try to find the others. They’re probably no better off than we are.”

“The others are fine,” Midoriya says, looking down at the villains in the water. She can almost see the gears turning in his head. “They’re surrounded, like we are, but they’re holding their own.”

“H-How do you know?” Mineta asks.

Midoriya lets out a short, hoarse laugh and rubs the back of his neck. “It’s a long story,” he says. “I’ll explain everything later, for now...let’s focus on clearing the shipwreck zone.”

Tsuyu has no idea what’s going on. She supposes Midoriya has always been a bit... strange, if that’s the right word. His lack of presence, his nervous laughs, his glowing eyes, that scar…

But--and she doesn’t really know why--she gets the feeling that she can trust him. She can look at his face and tell that he isn’t steering her wrong. She knows that he’s someone she can trust.

She nods. “Tell us what to do,” she says.

Midoriya nods back. “I have an idea,” he says. “It’s probably really, really stupid, and you’re probably going to hate it--”

The boat lurches again. Midoriya almost, almost takes the plunge, but grabs at the railing again at the last second. They’re sinking faster now than ever before.

Tsuyu looks at him. “You were saying, Midori-chan?”

“R-Right.” Midoriya straightens up again, eyes gleaming. With tears, because he was just puking his guts up a second ago, but also with determination. “Here’s what we’re gonna do…”

Izuku has never used Dissociation that way for that long before.

He, Tsuyu and Mineta have just cleared the shipwreck zone, leaving a cluster of villains, stuck together by Mineta’s sticky balls, behind them. Izuku’s middle finger and thumb are broken from firing off One For All into the water, but he can deal with that. It isn’t a problem. At least it isn’t his arm.

He still feels sick, though. Remarkably sick. His calves hurt from when he was kicking the mist villain into the air earlier, which is odd, because he’d been a ghost then.

I wonder if any injuries I get as a ghost interacting with the physical world are transferred onto my physical body, Izuku wonders, wincing as sharp pain twists through his stomach. If so, I need to be more careful in the future…

“Midori-chan, what should we do now?” Asu-- Tsuyu asks, and she sounds worried. “Don’t you think you should sit down now…?”

Izuku shakes his head. “No, I’m fine,” he says. “I’m worried about Aizawa-sensei. He charged into the fight earlier, but he can’t fight off that many villains all by himself for this long.”

“Are you kidding me!?” Mineta questions. “He’s Eraserhead! He can do anything!”

“It’s impractical,” Izuku cuts in. “Aizawa-sensei is a hero, an amazing hero, but he’s still a person. He’s a human being, and…” His stomach twists and turns, and he swallows back the bile in his throat. “...We all have our limitations.”   

“So what do you suggest we do?” Tsuyu asks. “We can’t get in his way--”

“We’re not going to,” Izuku says. “I’m thinking, maybe, we can stay on the sidelines and fight off whatever villains come running at him. It’s the best way to do this, I think.”

And it is. He can’t think of any other way--

“Midoriya, look!” Mineta lurches forward suddenly, pointing with one hand and grabbing Izuku’s arm with the other. “Look!”

Izuku turns, and so does Tsuyu. The hand-villain has finally stepped into the fray, and he runs at Aizawa. Aizawa dodges; it looks easy; the hand-villain swings at him, grabs his arm; Aizawa’s skin on his elbow peels, but he doesn’t give up. He yanks away, jerks away, and--

Something yanks at Izuku’s chest. A feeling he’d had before. The same feeling he’d had when they stepped into the USJ. The same feeling he’d had a second before the villains showed up.

And it’s happening again.

“Stay here,” Izuku demands, and he leaps out of the water, onto the shore, and takes off running.

“Midori-chan!” Tsuyu’s voice screams back at him, and she sounds more scared than he’s ever heard her, which shocks him, but no, no, no, whatever’s about to happen here cannot happen, Izuku can’t let it happen, he can’t let it happen, no, no, no--

The villain--the bulky one, the one with animalistic features and crazed, deranged eyes--steps forward. Izuku’s feet pound as he runs, as he tries, as he tries so hard, but there’s too much distance, it’s too far, it’s too far, he won’t make it--

The villain’s fist comes down on Aizawa’s head.

There’s a sickening crack, then a thump when Aizawa’s body crumples to the ground in a bloody, broken heap. Blood pools steadily beneath his head, minimal at first but then there’s a lot of it, there’s a lot of it, there’s so much of it--

Izuku screeches to a halt, shoes digging into the dirt and bringing up dust. He stares, eyes wide, feeilng vaguely like he’s being strangled. His heart is pounding, and half his stomach is in his throat, and it has nothing to do with the fact that he’d overused his Quirk earlier.

Aizawa-sensei…

Izuku stares. His head feels like it’s stuffed with cotton, but he can hear a high-pitched whir. His ears are ringing. His mind is blank. He can’t tear his eyes away from the scene in front of him. He can’t move. All he can do...is watch.

The bulky villain slams his fist down onto Aizawa’s arm. There’s another sickening crack, and Aizawa lets out a short, guttural shriek of pain. The villain grabs him by the hair and slams him into the ground again, once, then twice, then again--

Stop it.

Izuku’s ears are ringing. He feels dizzy. He wants to throw up.

Stop it.

Another crack. Another shriek. Then silence.

Stop it--!

The mist villain appears, swirling by the hand-villain’s side. “Shigaraki,” the villain reports, and the voice sounds odd in Izuku’s ringing ears.

The hand villain, Shigaraki, turns. “What? Did you kill the students?”

“No, but one of them managed to escape the facility. They’re going to get help now.”

“...What did you just say?”

Shigaraki’s hands are trembling at his sides, and Izuku knows it’s out of anger. He’s seen this kind of anger enough times to know exactly what this means.

“Kurogiri...if you weren’t our only way out of here… I’d kill you now.”

The warp gate villain doesn’t seem very surprised. Remorseful, maybe, but not surprised. Perhaps this has happened before. “Reinforcements will arrive at any moment now,” he says, voice unbelievably steady. “What should we do?”

There’s a long moment. Shigaraki’s fists clench and unclench over and over, one finger at a time.

And then, he stops. His shoulders slump, and he looks down.

“I see,” he says, facial expression covered by the detached hand on his face. “I guess this is game over for us. All Might isn’t here...which means in the end...our main objective…there’s no possible way...”

He trails off, scratching his neck with two pale, bony fingers.

“...However...even if we can’t kill him…”

He turns his head and looks directly at Izuku. His eyes are bloodshot and wide, crazed, almost like the inhuman creature pinning Aizawa down…

The villain smiles. “...We can wound his pride as the Symbol of Peace, can’t we?”

And then, Shigaraki runs.

Towards Izuku.

Izuku is close--maybe ten feet away--and even as Shigaraki closes this short distance between them, all he can do is stare. He knows Shigaraki is running at him, he knows Shigaraki’s Quirk can kill him, he knows he’s in danger--

But he feels nothing.

Nothing at all.

The whole world slows until it’s barely moving at all, and Izuku takes in his surroundings with a sudden sense of clarity. Tsuyu is reaching for him. Her shriek of his name rings through his ears, barely distinguishable and full of fear and terror. Shigaraki is reaching out towards him, fingers spread towards Izuku’s face, mere inches away now. Behind him, the inhuman monster towers over Aizawa, and blood pools on the ground beneath the hero’s head.

Izuku’s spirit, his being, the person he is, gives a lurch. A thought pierces through his mind like a spear.  

I want to save him, he thinks, and absentmindedly, he reaches up, touching the cold metal of the bell around his neck.  

I want to save all of them.

Izuku takes in a breath. For some reason, Kirishima’s words--a joke at the time, but something he remembers regardless--come back to him. Izuku lowers his hand back to his side, and despite what’s going on around him, he feels oddly...detached. Calm.

A realization washes over him as Kirishima’s words echo through his mind.

You can’t kill someone…

Izuku raises his head and narrows his eyes at Shigaraki.

...Who’s already dead.

He drops.

Chapter Text

It’s probably the stupidest thing Izuku has done thus far, and he’s done a lot of stupid things.

Izuku’s body hits the ground, but his ghost doesn’t move and his gaze doesn’t falter. His pain is gone, his stomach isn’t churning anymore, and he leaves as much fear as he can with his physical body.

Shigaraki skids to a halt, staring down at Izuku’s limp, unmoving form. “What…?” Shigaraki questions, unaware that Izuku’s still staring at him as a ghost, still waiting for his time to strike. “Did he...did he seriously faint? Are you kidding me?”

Izuku grins, if just to trick his own lingering fear, and he concentrates all his energy on his leg and slams his knee into Shigaraki’s stomach.

Shigaraki lets out a choked sound and stumbles backwards, hands moving to cover his mouth. The mist villain--Kurogiri--starts forward, but Shigaraki swings an arm out to stop him.

“Something’s wrong here,” Shigaraki growls. His eyes are on Izuku’s body; Izuku’s ghost hovers over it, unseen. “I’ll take care of this…”

He runs for Izuku’s body. He isn’t expecting it to move.

Well then, Izuku thinks, guess I’ll just--

He zooms back into his body, swings around, and kicks Shigaraki in the kneecap.

Shigaraki trips backwards again with a shriek of pain, and Izuku, once more associated with his own body, scrambles off the ground and takes a few steps backwards. His stomach is burning, but that doesn’t matter.

Shigaraki glares at him, hands holding his leg. “You tricked me,” he snarls, his voice a low hiss. “You tricked me.”

“Yeah I did,” Izuku says, and he doesn’t like the way his body feels--achy and burning and afraid. “I’m a coward, what did you expect me to do? Come at you from the front?”

Shigaraki isn’t happy, this is obvious. Izuku resists the urge to dissociate and keeps his spirit firmly in his body, if just for now. It doesn’t seem like Shigaraki figured out his Quirk yet, which means, as long as he has that...he has an advantage.

“Hey, I’ve got a question,” Izuku says, striding forward. His confidence is a lie, and so is his smile, but he forces himself to keep it up. “Have you ever thought about dropping the whole ‘villain’ thing and becoming, oh, I dunno...a plumber instead?”

Shigaraki blinks. “A plumber?”

“Yeah.” Izuku keeps walking, and he grins. “You seem like you’d make a pretty swell handy-man to me.”

“...What?” Shigaraki stares at him, like he can’t quite tell what Izuku is. “...What?”

“Well, yeah,” Izuku says. He stops walking, leaving about five feet between himself and the villain. “I’ve gotta hand it to you, it’s pretty--”

Shigaraki lunges at him, hand outstretched towards Izuku’s face.

Izuku drops his body just a split second before Shigaraki’s fingers touch him.

Shigaraki flinches, not expecting it a second time.

And Izuku concentrates on his hand, balls his fist, and socks Shigaraki in the face with all his might.

Shigaraki stumbles backwards; the hand on his face goes flying off, and it lands a few feet away. Izuku doesn’t quite know what to feel, but he imagines if he was in his own body, he’d feel pretty sick.

Shigaraki turns and grabs the hand off the ground, and Izuku uses this moment to slip back into his body. His stomach burns and churns, but he swallows back the bile in his throat and refuses to throw up. He can’t let Shigaraki see any weakness; if he shows weakness he’s dead.

He straightens up, just as Shigaraki settles the hand back across his face. “How dare you…” the villain seethes. “How dare you mock Father…”

“Father?” Izuku repeats, frowning, ignoring his burning stomach. The longer this goes, the less scared he feels, and even though he doesn’t understand, he doesn’t complain.  

He can fight like this. He can use this power and fight. He can fight like this, if just for now. If just long enough for the reinforcements to arrive. If just long enough to let the others escape.

“So, you have daddy issues?” he says. “Is that what this is? Is that why you attacked us?”

Shigaraki glares at him. Izuku wishes he had his helmet--considering how many times he’s going to need to drop in this fight, it’d be really nice to have.

But all he has is his PE gear and a skull he hopes is hard enough to withstand what he’s about to do.

“Come on,” Izuku says idly, grinning at Shigaraki, “we all have problems. Believe me, whatever you’re dealing with, killing people isn’t a good coping method.”

Shigaraki lunges.

Tsuyu is watching the fight, but she doesn’t know what’s going on. As Shigaraki lunges, Midoriya drops, like a sack of bricks. He drops, and he lays there, crumpled in an unmoving heap--but then, as Shigaraki lunges for him, something hits him. A tangible thing hits him, hits him hard enough to throw him backwards--a blow to the stomach, it looks like.

But there’s nothing there. Nothing there at all.

It’s just blank, empty space.

Blank, empty space…

...And Midoriya’s lifeless body.

...What…?

“Hey, Shigaraki, that reminds me!”

Shigaraki’s legs jerk to the side, torn from underneath him, and he falls and slams into the ground. A second later, Midoriya comes to life again, rising to stand again. He’s pale, and his hands are shaking, but he’s grinning.

“Why did you attack us?” Midoriya asks.

Shigaraki gets up, slowly. The warp gate villain starts toward him cautiously, but Shigaraki stops him yet again.

“Go away,” Shigaraki demands, straightening up and staring Midoriya down. “If anyone’s going to take down this insufferable brat, it’s going to be me.”

“Oh, you already think I’m an insufferable brat?” Midoriya asks curiously, cocking his head to one side. He lets out a short, barking laugh, and Tsuyu can’t tell whether it’s cheerful of fiendish. “Believe me, you ain’t seen nothin’ yet!”

“Burn in hell!” Shigaraki yells, throwing himself at him.

“By the way, you never answered my question!” Midoriya rushes forward as well to meet him in battle. He stumbles, but doesn’t fall. “You attacked us, right? What for?”

“I attacked U.A.--!” Shigaraki swings an arm; Midoriya drops to the ground, but a second later, he’s moving again, kicking Shigaraki’s feet out from under him. Shigaraki trips, but doesn’t fall; he’s expecting it. “--So I could kill--!” Shigaraki lunges; Midoriya doesn’t drop this time, but he does leap out of the way. He falters upon landing and almost stumbles. “--All Might!”

“So that’s it?” Midoriya says. “That’s all? But why?”

Shigaraki stops mid-attack, his outstretched arm tensing. “What?”

“Why do you want to kill All Might?” Midoriya asks, and he says it so calmly and collectively that it’s like they’re discussing dinner plans, not life and death. “What’s your objective, Shigaraki?”

“I want to destroy what I hate,” Shigaraki tells him, lowering his hand to his side. “I want to--”

“But why?” Midoriya questions. “Why do you wanna destroy what you hate? Yeah, sure, you hate it, but what are you fighting for? What kind of world are you trying to create? A world without All Might? That doesn’t make sense by itself.”

He’s stalling, Tsuyu realizes, and the words leave bile in her throat and ice in her chest. He’s stalling. He’s keeping all the attention on him to give everyone time to escape.  

“What the hell are you talking about?” Shigaraki ‘s eyes are narrowed, and his voice is full of venom. “I want to destroy what I hate, that’s it.”

“That’s cute,” Midoriya says, “but what are you fighting for?”

Shigaraki falters. He doesn’t know how to answer.  

“See, I’m fighting for a lot of things,” Midoriya goes on. “I’m fighting because I want people to live in a world without darkness. I want people to be able to smile and look forward to the future. I’m fighting for the friends I’ve made, for the people I love. So tell me this, Shigaraki--!”

Midoriya runs. He’s pale, he’s shaking, he’s scared.

And he’s charging into battle, grinning.

“What are you fighting for, Shigaraki? You say all you want to do is destroy what you hate? Don’t make me laugh!”

Midoriya throws a punch; Shigaraki dodges and tries to land one of his own, but Midoriya’s body drops. Something invisible slams into Shigaraki, and he stumbles backwards; a second later, Midoriya gets up again and lunges.

“My friends, the people at U.A.--we’re all fighting for something! I’m fighting for something!”

He drops; Shigaraki reaches for his body, but something slams into him and knocks him back. Tsuyu watches, wide-eyed and dumbfounded.

Midori-chan…

Midoriya--real, physical Midoriya, not blank, empty space Midoriya--grabs Shigaraki’s arm.

“I’m fighting because I don’t want to lose the people I love!” Midoriya yells. “I’m fighting because I don’t want to lose hope! Against someone like you, who doesn’t know what they’re fighting for--!”

Midoriya swings around, yanks his Shigaraki’s arm, pulls him over his shoulder--

“--Of course I’m going to beat you!”

He decks Shigaraki back-first into the ground.  

...You’re amazing.  

Izuku knows he’s being an idiot. He knows this is stupid, he knows taunting Shigaraki is only going to make things worse for himself.

But he can buy time like this. Iida escaped and is going for help, help that will be here any second now. Until then, Izuku resolves to hold off Shigaraki, to hold off the villains, to at least keep their attention focused on him. Tsuyu and Mineta are close, too close; if the villains decide to go after them instead…

Shigaraki gets to his feet slowly, wincing as he does so, and as soon as his legs are underneath him, he raises his head and straightens up. He doesn’t seem especially angry anymore, but Izuku can feel something rolling off him in waves.

It’s not anger anymore.

It’s hatred.

“You know what, I’m sick of you,” Shigaraki snaps. “You keep running your mouth, talking like you know everything…”

“Oh, you mean like you?” Izuku says, trying to keep the waver out of his voice. “You come barrelling in here, guns-blazing, saying you’re gonna kill All Might, and you think I’m the one who needs to stop running their mouth?”

“Shut up,” Shigaraki growls, and he turns away. “I’m through dealing with you. Nomu.”

The inhuman creature with bulging eyes and visible brains raises its head. It’s still towering over Aizawa, but it stopped driving him into the ground a while ago.

Shigaraki raises an arm and points a single, bony finger at Izuku.

“Kill him. Make it as painful as you want.”

Izuku has just enough time to stiffen. Don’t know what I was expecting, but--

It happens too fast. The creature moves too fast. One second, it’s standing over Aizawa--and then the next second Izuku is knocked off his feet, pain searing through his lungs and ribs like hot coals.

He slams back-first into the far wall of the USJ; he feels something snap, and he grits his teeth to keep from crying out. Before he hits the ground, the Nomu is back, it’s right in front of him, and it grabs him by the throat and slams him against the wall again.

And then Izuku can’t breathe. He’s vaguely aware of Tsuyu calling his name, Mineta screaming, but that’s it, and it’s very vague. His ribs are messed up; the Nomu is squeezing him, not tight enough to snap his neck, but tight enough to close off his airway.

He doesn’t have the chance to do anything, doesn’t have the chance to think, doesn’t have the chance to dissociate. The Nomu yanks him back away from the wall, then slams him into the ground.

His ribs snap. His ears ring. He hears screaming--maybe it’s him.

It’s like that time with Bakugou. The pain is grounding him in reality too much. He can’t escape. He can’t leave. He can’t dissociate.

He’s trapped.

“Kill him. Make it as painful as you want.”

A slow death, then...the Nomu’s going to take its time killing me...

And Izuku hates that, as his mind is dulled with pain and the Nomu drags him up to slam him into the ground once more, the one thing that comes to mind is

I can buy even more time now.

There’s a crack. There’s a slam. There’s a scream.

Tsuyu wants to jerk her head. She wants to shove herself beneath the waves to drown out the scene, but she can’t. She can’t move, she can’t think, she can’t turn away. All she can do is…

...Stare.  

The Nomu isn’t trying to kill him. Not yet. It slams Midoriya into the ground once, then twice, then again. Midoriya is still conscious, somehow, and blood runs down the sides of his face and leaves dark red splotches on the ground.

“I-I can’t…” Mineta’s voice is soft and choked. He’s like Tsuyu, desperate to look away but unable to. “I-I can’t...I can’t take this. P-Please s-stop...I-I can’t…”

Tsuyu can’t breathe anymore. Her train of thought derailed the moment the Nomu first attacked Midoriya, and it hasn’t gotten back on track yet. She doubts it will.

She can’t think, can’t move, can’t look away. Can’t breathe--

“Stop.” Shigaraki’s voice seems to come from far away, even though he’s close. The Nomu raises its head towards its master, and Tsuyu watches Shigaraki approach steadily, leisurely, like he has all the time in the world. Midoriya is on the ground, gasping, bleeding, but he’s alive, he’s alive, and the Nomu is standing over him, thick fingers buried in his scalp.

Shigaraki kneels across from them and looks at Midoriya. “This is what happens when you get in our way, brat,” he says simply. “Really, I don’t see how you could be so stupid…”

Blood cascades down the sides of Midoriya’s face, but he doesn’t back down. He stares at Shigaraki, even though he’s obviously in pain, even though there are tears in his eyes.

“I did it,” Midoriya chokes, spits, and the words sound like they hurt to say, “because I’m fighting for something. S-Something that’s worth this p-pain.”

The Nomu twists his arm behind his back, and Midoriya winces, snapping his teeth together to keep from screaming. He breathes heavily for a moment, riding out the pain, and then,

“H-Hey, Shigaraki…y-you’re gonna kill me, right? I’m gonna die?”

“Yeah,” Shigaraki snaps, like he couldn’t care less. “Go ahead, say whatever you want. Spew some more heroic bullshit, see where it gets you. It’s not like history’s gonna remember your last words.”

Midoriya looks at him. His eyes are blank and cold and dead, and Tsuyu doesn’t think anyone’s ever looked more dangerous.

“I-If you stand for nothing... what will you fall for?”

For just a moment, the world stops.

Then, a loud explosion rings throughout the USJ, and Shigaraki’s head snaps in that direction. The Nomu looks up, startled by the sound, and Midoriya lets out a hoarse, shaky laugh, going limp in the monster’s hold.

Tsuyu turns, too, looking over her shoulder.

There’s dust and smoke clouding at the entrance of the USJ.

“You.” Shigaraki reaches out, fingers twitching by Midoriya’s face. “What did you do?”

Midoriya smiles. “I-If that’s who I think it is, t-then…” He coughs, but doesn’t falter. “You’re screwed, Handy-Man.”

Izuku is alive.

He knows his ribs are messed up--he knows they are, it’s obvious--and he’s pretty sure he has some kind of a head injury, but he’s alive. The Nomu had hurt him, yes, hurt him badly, and he can already hear Recovery Girl screaming at him for being reckless, but…

He’s alive.

And All Might is here.

He did it. He held off the villains, kept their attention on him, bought all the time he could. He did his best, fought his damndest, endured the Nomu’s punches and slams.

And now All Might is here, and he knows he’s safe. He knows he’s safe, and he knows the rest of his classmates are safe, too. Aizawa is safe. The Nomu won’t hurt him again. The Nomu won’t hurt any of them again.

Shigaraki raises his head towards the smoke. “Nomu,” he says, suddenly urgent, “kill the brat, before--”

“BEFORE WHAT, VILLAINS?”

All Might’s voice booms overhead, and a second later, the hero is there, and Izuku wants to cry with relief.

“Come now,” All Might says, grinning, although Izuku can see a slight falter in the hero’s vibrant smile. “Do you really think I’d let you kill one of my dear students?”

The Nomu screeches, drops Izuku, and leaps at him; All Might retracts his fist and lands a solid blow to the Nomu’s stomach. The creature falters, but doesn’t stop; it pulls back its own fist for a punch, and All Might retaliates accordingly.

Izuku lays there for a while, gasping for breath as the ground trembles beneath him. His spirit isn’t glued to him anymore now that he can think beyond the pain; he can dissociate now, if he wants. He can get up again. He can keep fighting--

“Young Midoriya, stay down!”

Izuku’s eyes snap open, and he raises his head, just barely. The Nomu and All Might are exchanging blows, shockwaves following every punch; Shigaraki has retreated and is standing with Kurogiri, watching.

“I know what you’re thinking!” All Might calls over to him, pulling back his fist, “but stay down! Have some faith in your teacher, my boy!” All Might lets the punch fly, and the Nomu goes flying. A second later, they’re at it again.

Izuku drops his head back to the ground and lies still. Now that some of the adrenaline has worn off, all he feels is exhaustion, pain and nausea. He wants to throw up, but doesn’t; he isn’t sure there’s anything left in his stomach to throw up.

He watches the fight through half-lidded eyes. He watches All Might and the Nomu exchange blows back and forth, punch after punch, slam after slam, and it looks like All Might’s winning. It looks like he’s winning, it seems like--

There’s a pull at Izuku’s chest like before, as All Might wraps his arms around the Nomu from behind. Izuku knows what he’s going to do; he’s going to try slamming the Nomu head-first into the ground to immobilize him, but...that tug--

“Don’t do it!” Izuku shrieks, and All Might stops. “If you do that--!”

All Might doesn’t ask for an explanation; he stops what he’d been about to do and slams his fist into the Nomu’s stomach instead.

The suffocating feeling of dread leaves Izuku’s chest, and he breathes a short, breathy laugh of relief. He doesn’t know what that feeling is, that foreboding, but he makes a note to put it down in his “Dissociation” notebook when he gets home.

...Why do I have to be the one...with the confusing Quirk…

“Midori-chan. Midori-chan. Midori-chan.”

Izuku opens his eyes--he doesn’t remember closing them--and Tsuyu’s face swims into view.

“We have to go,” she says. “All we’ll do here is get in All Might’s way, we need to go. Here…” She takes his arm, carefully, and pulls it around her neck. “I’ll help you.”

“I-I’m fine,” he lies through his teeth (literally--he’s gritting them. It’s the only thing keeping him from crying out). “I-I can walk.”

“No you can’t.”

She pulls him to his feet, carefully, and wraps an arm around his waist. His ribs are burning, but he doesn’t protest. “We ran into Kirishima and Todoroki, they’re helping Mineta get Aizawa to safety. Come on, we’ll take it slow...”

They start walking. Izuku is stumbling all over the place, and he’s sure he’d fall if it weren’t for her. The ground is shaking and trembling beneath them, and a couple lurches almost knock Izuku off his feet.

It hurts…

Izuku grits his teeth and tries to fight through it.

...It hurts...

They get a considerable distance before Izuku can’t do it anymore. His vision blurs and goes dark for a second; when he opens his eyes, Tsuyu is calling him again, supporting his weight.

“Y-Yeah...o-on second thought…” Izuku sucks in a shaky breath and exhales it as a weak laugh. He hopes it doesn’t sound as pathetic as it feels. “C-Can...I just...sit down for a sec…?”

Tsuyu glances behind them; All Might and the Nomu are still fighting, but All Might definitely has the upper hand. They’re a considerable distance away now, far away enough that the trembling and lurching ground doesn’t affect them anymore.

She nods. “Alright.”

Izuku sinks to the ground, and she sinks down beside him, maintaining a hold around his waist. He’s grateful for it. It makes for a nice anchor through the pain in his ribs and head. Absentmindedly, he reaches towards his neck; his thumb brushes the cold, smooth metal of his bell, and he lets out a sigh of relief.

It’s okay, then.

Everything’s okay now.

It’s not okay. Everything is very not okay.

The Nomu is gone, All Might defeated it, literally sent it into the sky up, up, up and away with a finishing blast and a resounding shout of victory. Only Shigaraki and Kurogiri remain now.

Everything is not okay.

It’s not okay. Nothing is okay anymore. Absolutely nothing.

The tug and yank and pull in Izuku’s chest is stronger than ever. He’s washed with a feeling worse than anything he’s ever felt before, worse than the feeling he’d had when he stepped into the USJ, worse than the feeling he’d had right before Aizawa was slammed into the ground by the Nomu.

It’s worse than any of that. It is so much worse, so much more suffocating, so much more terrifying…

Shigaraki and Kurogiri stand their ground. All Might smiles at them, and of course he does, but it’s a bluff. Izuku thinks about what happened earlier, the three fingers Thirteen held up. All Might has been running on sheer will power this entire time. He’s out of time.  

And now there’s a tug in Izuku’s chest as a feeling of foreboding washes over him. He wonders, briefly…

...If this is a death omen.

His spirit gives a lurch. Tsuyu is beside him, watching the same scene as him, but she doesn’t know. She doesn’t know the extent of what is happening here. She doesn’t feel what Izuku feels, doesn’t realize how bad of a predicament this truly is.

Izuku grinds his teeth together.

I can’t let him die.

He remembers All Might offering him One For All, remembers the days spent training on the beach leading up to the entrance exam. He remembers All Might ruffling his hair, sending him texts to check up on him, visiting him in the infirmary. He remembers All Might joking to cheer him up, remembers the words you can become a hero.

And there’s a stronger tug in Izuku’s chest.

I can’t let him die.

“T-Tsuyu,” Izuku says, not even facing her, “...hold my body for me.”

“Hold your— Midori-chan!”

Izuku takes off, leaving his body behind, and flies back towards the danger. The pain is gone immediately, and he feels suddenly rejuvenated, energized--maybe it’s because he’s not in his body, or maybe it’s because he’s desperate.

I can’t let him die.

He doesn’t know how, but All Might has become something of a father to him. He doesn’t know how or when it happened, only that it happened, and he can’t let him die.

I can’t let him die.

He knows there isn't time, he knows All Might is out of time, and he knows that there is only a small window in which he has to act.

Shigaraki is running. All Might is standing. Izuku is flying.

Please…

...I want…

...I want to save him--!

And then, something odd happens, something that's never happened before.

Izuku falls.

He falls, as a ghost.

That’s…

...That’s never happened before. Never.

He slams into the dirt below, and dust flies up all around him. That’s never happened before, either. Hitting the ground doesn't hurt, of course--he can’t feel pain as a ghost--but it's enough to thoroughly shake him.

What just…?

He raises his head off the ground immediately, still reeling over the fact that he is on the ground and not just hovering over it. He’s a ghost. He’s a ghost and he’s lying on the physical ground. Not phasing through it, like he usually does. Beneath him, for the first time ever, the ground is solid.

He looks down at his hands—they're still transparent, like they always are when he's a ghost, but his skin is outlined now, outlined in a faint, glowing green, and he has no idea what this means.

“What the hell.” Shigaraki’s breathless, horrified voice brings Izuku back to reality, and he raises his head as the villain stumbles backwards, looking like he's seen a ghost.

It's at that moment that Izuku realizes it, and Shigaraki's horror suddenly makes sense.

...They can see me.

He looks around. Tsuyu is behind him, eyes wide and full of shock. Across from him are the villains, staring, horrified. All Might has turned to him, and although he's still standing firm with that unwavering smile, Izuku can see a small hint of fear and shock. A little further away, Izuku sees his own body in a heap on the ground, unmoving and lifeless.

They can see me. They can all see me.

Izuku raises his head and picks himself up off the ground, a ground that is solid beneath him. He doesn't know what that means, what that implies, but...well...he'll have time to figure it out later.

Right now, though, he resolves to fight.

He runs.

The world around him spirals and fades, and suddenly he's moving faster than he's ever moved before. He feels somehow detached, like he's passenger instead of driver, and this is saying something considering he's about as detached from his body right now as he can get. His thought process is in shambles. He has no idea what's happening anymore, no concept of anything.

But he runs. Because he knows his friends are in danger. He knows the people he loves are in mortal peril and he doesn't want to lose them.

He doesn't want to lose Tsuyu. He doesn't want to lose Iida. He doesn't want to lose Uraraka. He doesn't want to lose Aizawa. He doesn't want to lose Kirishima. He doesn't want to lose All Might.

I can't lose them.

He feels something—a tug, but it's not of himself anymore. It’s not familiar. He feels something grab at him, or rather, several somethings. Something tugs him. Another something pushes him. Another something pulls him.

He feels a rush of energy, a burst of power, and words echo through his head:

Fight.

Win.

Save them.

The world spirals into white, and he's consumed.

Tsuyu doesn't know what she's seeing.

Midoriya has always been... strange. Him and his dumb jokes and his nervous laugh, the way he rubbed the back of his neck when he didn't know what else to do. She's only known him for a little while, but she's picked up so much of his personality, so much of his heart.

But somehow, he’s also the boy who came first in the entrance exam, beating out people like Bakugou, people with raw power and combat abilities, and Tsuyu has never understood why or how. Midoriya always seemed harmless enough, a mess of smiles and puns and nervous laughter.

But now, in this moment...she understands it. She understands all too clearly.

Midoriya’s body is limp, leaning up against her, but she sees him running. She sees Midoriya running towards Shigaraki. His image isn’t entirely clear; it reminds her of a rough outline, a sketch if you would, bright green and glowing.

But it isn't just Midoriya.

Tsuyu...doesn't know what she's looking at.

Shigaraki steps backwards; Midoriya skids to a stop across from him a little ways away. All Might is there, too, but he isn’t moving, simply...observing, watching as Midoriya stares Shigaraki down.

Midoriya is fuming, emitting a tangible feeling of anger and malice and determination, and so far, the Midoriya Tsuyu knows only possesses the final of those traits. He gets angry, yes, but not like this. Never like this.

And that's not even the scary part.

Shigaraki lifts his head and takes a step backwards, eyes wide, and Tsuyu almost can't believe it.

He’d been confident before, attacking and running and swinging and punching but--

He’s scared now. He's afraid. Afraid of Midoriya.

But that's not it. That's not all.

Tsuyu watches. And she notices something she really should've noticed before.

Midoriya stares Shigaraki down with a twisted, bright-eyed look, and...

...He isn't alone.

Toshinori watches, too stunned and shocked to do or say a single thing. He watches Izuku's face, sketched in an outline of green--Izuku's ghost, that's what this is, and he can see it. For the first time since meeting the boy—and, by extension, probably the first time in the boy's entire life— they can see his ghost.

And Toshinori honestly wishes that's the most unsettling thing about the situation before him, but it's not.

Izuku--Izuku’s ghost, his spirit --has several scars on his face. There’s the jagged one mirrored on his physical body, yes, but there are others, too--smaller ones, ones that aren’t nearly as noticeable. That’s unsettling, too, but even so, it’s not the most unsettling thing about this.

The thing is, right now, Izuku isn't alone. He’s standing, and he’s staring down Shigaraki with a twisted look, but he’s not standing alone.

There are figures, people, standing with him, their outlines fuzzy and distorted and nearly impossible to make out. There are seven of them. Seven transparent figures whose facial expressions are clouded and fuzzy, and Toshinori doesn’t understand why or how or who--

And then, suddenly, it clicks. His eyes go wide, and his heart skips a beat.

Seven figures.

Seven.

One For All...

No way.

There's...

...There's no way.

“Who…” Shigaraki's eyes are wide, and his hands—his real ones—tremble at his sides, and all his confidence from earlier is completely, totally gone.

He stares at Izuku, horrified, and whispers,

“What the hell are you?”

Izuku grins, and even though Toshinori knows this boy, even though Toshinori knows he's cheerful and kind and tells stupid jokes, the look on his face sends a dozen icy chills down Toshinori's spine.

The boy’s smile, as a person, is nothing short of sunshine incarnate. It’s the type of contagious smile that you look at and think, Nothing can go wrong. It's going to be alright, no matter what. It’s a reassuring smile, a bright smile, a hero's smile. A smile Izuku saves for the people he loves.

But the boy’s smile as a ghost, whether or not he means for it to be, is a thing of nightmares. It’s wide, too wide, showing off all his teeth, and Toshinori wonders what that grin looks like to the enemy.

He wonders what kind of icy chills are going down Shigaraki's spine.

Toshinori takes in a breath. He should really, really stop being surprised by this kid...

“You know what,” Izuku starts slowly, “I’m just as scared as you are right now, Shigaraki. I’m just as terrified. Every part of me is screaming to run, but I’m not going to do that. I care too much about my friends to do that.”

He takes a single step forward. The figures behind him follow.

Shigaraki steps back, shaking. “Kurogiri,” he says, “get us out of here--”

“I’m a coward,” Izuku goes on. “I know I’m a coward, and I’m pretty sure that’ll never change. I’ll always be one, no matter what. But, for some reason...right now…”

He looks at Shigaraki with blank, dead eyes, and when Shigaraki steps backwards again, Toshinori almost does the same.

“I don’t think I’m nearly as scared of you as I should be,” Izuku tells him blankly. “I think...the only reason I’m scared at all...is because I don’t want to lose the people I love. I’m scared to lose them.”

“Kurogiri,” Shigaraki says, “Kurogiri, let’s go--”

“But,” Izuku goes on slowly, taking his sweet time, “as far as fearing for my own life is concerned...”

Behind Izuku, the seven figures file into place—no, not behind Izuku, with Izuku, alongside Izuku. If Izuku notices, he doesn't comment. A wide, toothy grin splits his face again, and his bright eyes lock on Shigaraki like a viper waiting to strike.

Only, in this moment, Izuku is more terrifying than any viper.

“...The dead have no reason to fear the living,” Izuku says, still grinning. “And I’m a ghost.”

Chapter Text

Toshinori knows what fear looks like. He’s fought enough villains to have it ingrained in his memory--the instant the villains realize fighting is pointless, the moment they realize they’ve been beat...that’s when fear kicks in. When they’ve given all they can to the fight and have run out of strength.

And Toshinori knows his own fear, too. He feels like, at this point, fear is more of an old friend than anything else.

Now, he watches as a fifteen year old highschool boy stares down villains who attacked him and his classmates with the intention of killing them.  

And it isn’t the boy who’s afraid.

Izuku takes a step forward. The seven distorted images-- ghosts --follow his lead, hovering over the ground behind him. Shigaraki and Kurogiri step backwards, away.

They’re afraid. As they should be.

“So,” Izuku says, raising a hand. “You seemed pretty confident that you could kill All Might earlier, didn’t you? Why is it that you’re backing down now to a kid?” He flicks his fingers back towards himself, eyes bright above a wide, twisted smile. “Come at me, bro.”

Shigaraki and Kurogiri flinch back. For all their talk, for them storming into the USJ ready to face “All Might” head-on...as this fifteen year old boy stares them down…

...They’re afraid.

And Toshinori thinks he may have misjudged Midoriya Izuku. He mistook the boy for a normal middle school kid who loves puns and lame gags and longs to save others more than anyone else Toshinori ever met. And this is all true for Izuku, of course, but it’s not all.

When it boils down to it, Midoriya Izuku is a terrifying force to be reckoned with.

The boy smiles again, and it's the most unsettling thing Toshinori has ever seen.

“Well?” Izuku says. “What are you waiting for?”

Shigaraki raises a hand and points with a shaking finger. For the record, it’s a brave move for someone in his predicament--after all, he’s only being stared down by eight ghosts.

“You.” Shigaraki’s voice wavers. “You’re not human, you can’t be human. You’re--”

“A monster, yeah, I know.” Something flickers in Izuku’s eyes, though, as he says it--something like pain. It’s gone a second later, replaced with another eerie smile, but it’d definitely been there, and the smile he wears now is definitely forced. “You’re probably right. But if being…” He pauses, fumbles for a moment, “...if being like this means I can protect the people I care about, well...yeah. I’ll be a monster.”  

He raises his head.

“So what about you, Handy-Man?” he asks--his smile fades with the light in his eyes, and he stares at Shigaraki with a blank, dead expression. “Are you okay with being a monster?”

Silence.

And then, many things happen at once.

Gunfire rings out overhead; blood spurts from several gunshot wounds on Shigaraki’s arms, legs--Kurogiri leaps into the fray, covering Shigaraki with his warp gate and folding in on himself. Bullets sink into the mist harmlessly, and a second later, the gate disappears with Shigaraki.

They’re gone.

“...So they ran after all,” Izuku says, staring at the now-empty space. He laughs hoarsely and shakes his head, and when his voice comes back, it’s small and fragile.

“...And people called me a coward.”

Toshinori winces. His heart gives a lurch. Midoriya…

And then he considers the gunshots and turns in the direction from whence they came. He can’t see it very well, but there’s a band of heroes swarming at the entrance of the USJ, ready for battle. There are others there, too--students of Class 1-A having regrouped at the front, plus several teams of medics. A little closer to him, Toshinori sees Tsuyu, looking towards the entrance, with Izuku’s lifeless body leaning up against her.

Toshinori turns back towards Izuku’s spirit. The seven figures around him flock, distorted, but they’re fading now, little by little. He watches for a moment, still stunned by the whole situation.

And then, one of the figures turns to him.

He can’t make out any defining features, of course--it’s just a fuzzy form, a fuzzy, distorted ghost, but they’re definitely looking at him. A pair of bright yellow eyes, not unlike Kurogiri’s, find his.

The figure raises a fuzzy limb--an arm--and waves.

Toshinori blinks.

And then, all seven figures fade into the air like they’d never been there at all.

Izuku doesn’t know what happened.

Well, yes, he does, vaguely--but it’s more of a concept. A blur. He knows what happened, what he did; he’s just having a seriously hard time comprehending it.

He looks down at his hands. His figure is as vibrant as it’d been a second ago, and his feet are still planted firmly on solid ground.

Weird, he thinks, raising his head. That’s never happened before…

“Young Midoriya!”

Izuku’s head whips around. All Might is standing there, surrounded by a cloud of smoke; he finally ran out of time, then. He looks worse for wear, but not seriously injured, and Izuku lets out a huge sigh of relief.

That’s good…

...I made it in time…

He runs towards his mentor--as a ghost, of course--and stops just in front of him. All Might stares at him for a long moment, and Izuku stares back--and then, All Might reaches out, hesitates, and ruffles Izuku’s hair.

It’s odd, Izuku thinks, that he’s able to actually do that right now.

All Might withdraws his hand. “Young Midoriya...your Quirk doesn’t make any sense.”

Izuku laughs loosely, and he thinks that it’s nice to be able to laugh after what happened today. “Thanks,” he says. “I’m sure whatever happened here...I-I mean...all of this.” He gestures to himself. “...There’s, I mean…”

“I know,” All Might says, nodding. “We’ll figure it out, don’t worry. I’m sure there’s an explanation.”

Izuku smiles, nods.

“Oh--” All Might pauses, frowning. “You’re fading.”

“I’m--?” Izuku looks down at himself. Some of the vibrance is leaving, returning him to his normal transparent, ghostly form. “I see. I should probably, y’know...find my body…”

“You do that,” All Might says. “I’ll wait here for now. I can’t maintain my other form anymore.”

Izuku nods. “Gotcha. Well--bye!”

He takes off towards Tsuyu. His footsteps feel light; in a second, he’ll be floating again.

“Young Midoriya.”

Izuku stops and looks over his shoulder. All Might smiles at him.

“I’m proud of you, my boy. What you did took a lot of courage. ”

Izuku blinks. Then, he beams.

“You too!” Izuku says, and without waiting for a response, he spins around and races towards Tsuyu and his body.

By the time he gets there, he’s a full ghost again, transparent and unseen. His feet don’t touch the ground anymore; he’s back to hovering.

There’s a team of medics already laying his body on a stretcher; Tsuyu is standing by them, telling them how he sustained the injuries, explaining that he’d been slammed into the ground several times by Shigaraki’s monster. Izuku sucks in a breath (or, what he thinks is a breath--he is a ghost) and bites his lip. His body looks...bad. There’s blood on the sides of his face from gashes on his head, his skin is ghostly pale (Ironic, he thinks), and he remembers the sharp pain he’d felt in his ribs. The medics are bandaging him all over the place, but still; healing will take time, and until then, it’s going to hurt.

Izuku hesitates, steels himself, and slips back into his body.

It burns.

His eyes snap open, his cry of pain swallowed up by a sharp inhale of breath. The medics notice he’s awake and move faster now; someone flashes a penlight in his eyes, and someone else is saying something about an oxygen mask.

Everything is spinning and blurring together. His stomach burns and twists with nausea, and he turns his head. He chokes; his throat burns, it tastes like there’s metal in his mouth--

Oh.

There’s a splatter of red on the otherwise white stretcher.

That’s…

...Oh.

That’s blood…

He can’t register it. He knows what it is, of course, but things aren’t clicking. There’s business around him; he feels like he’s underwater, his ears ringing, the voices muffled. He feels hands on his forearm; Tsuyu’s there, and her grip makes for a nice anchor as the world around him slips away. Something is put over his mouth and nose, and then they’re moving. Tsuyu’s hands slip off his arm, and with that he’s dragged under by pain and shock.

When Tenya comes back, it’s with reinforcements from U.A.

The heroes spread out immediately, and so do the medics, and Tenya’s eyes scan those who are here, searching. Most of his classmates are here up front, being looked over by a few medics; the heroes are rallying up unconscious villains, tying their hands behind their backs to be shunted off to police custody where they belong.

“Iida!”

Tenya turns as Uraraka sprints towards him, looking frantic. He'd passed her (along with Sero, Ashido and Shouji, and an injured Thirteen) on the way in, just outside the U.A.'s double doors. A team of medics are outside helping Thirteen now, and the hero didn't seem to be gravely injured, which are both good things.

“Uraraka,” Tenya says heavily, but not without relief. “You're alright, then. I'm glad.”
Uraraka nods. “Deku bought us time to escape,” she tells him, but her voice is thick. "Iida, do...do you have any idea what...what actually happened earlier? W-With Deku?”  

Tenya shakes his head. "I haven't got a clue."

And he doesn't, he hasn't, but he knows there'll be time for all of that later. He'll be able to ask Midoriya and hopefully get some answers—after all, there's a reason for everything that happened earlier. He doesn't know what it is yet, but there definitely is one.

“Hey, you two!”

Tenya and Uraraka raise their heads. Kirishima stops just in front of them, not even out of breath.

“Glad to see you guys are still alive,” he says, and he says it like he's trying to make light of the situation, but can't quite decide how to go about it. “Man, what I wouldn't do for one of Midoriya's dumb jokes right about now…” He stops abruptly and looks around for a moment or two. “...Come to think of it...where is Midoriya?”

“Last I saw him he was going to make sure everyone else was safe,” Uraraka answers, wringing her hands together. “Do you think...do you think he's okay?”

“I'm sure he’s fine!” Kirishima says, and he sounds so sure of himself that Tenya can't help but believe it. “I mean, this is Midoriya we're talking about, he’s tough. I'm still trying to figure out how the heck he came first in the entrance exam, though…”

Tenya tenses. He shares a side-glance with Uraraka, who seems just as uncomfortable.

“...Oh, crap.” Kirishima's eyes are wide. “I missed something big, didn't I.”

“Big” seems like an understatement, and their lack of answer is enough for Kirishima.

“Dag-freaking- nabbit.”

“It was so cool, though!” Uraraka says immediately, and there's light in her eyes now, light that wasn't there a second ago. She calms down as she goes on, but the sparkle doesn’t leave her eyes. “It was really amazing. Deku... he's really amazing. He kept making puns at that freaky warp-gate villain.”

“No kidding!” Kirishima grins. “Well, that's our Midoriya for ya, I guess. I’ll have to ask him about it sometime—”

A team of medics show up suddenly, rolling a stretcher with them, and Tenya feels like all the air is sucked out of his lungs at once. Kirishima's voice cuts off. Uraraka gasps sharply, and her hands fly to cover her mouth.

That's...

...That's Midoriya.

He's unconscious, and he's paler than Tenya has ever seen him. There's blood on his head, on his face, on his chin; there's an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose and a small, portable tank on the stretcher. The medics are frantic, moving quickly and precisely. Tsuyu is there, too, and she has this haunted look in her eyes, like she's seen a ghost.

“Holy crap,” Kirishima whispers, staring. “Holy... crap…”

Tenya can't look away. He wants to, he really does, but he can't. He stares, he watches; the medics are talking, and he makes out words like “ribs” and “concussion” and “crushed” but that's all. He wants to say something to Uraraka and Kirishima, maybe a word of comfort or consolation but he can’t, not when the only thought going through his mind is

All I did was run.

He stares, watching, unable to do anything else, and all he can think about is the fact that he abandoned Midoriya. Midoriya had told him to go, of course, and Tenya wasn't about to argue with him, not when he sounded so serious and desperate, but in the end, when it came down to it,

All I did was run.

Tsuyu disappeared a little while ago, he doesn’t notice that until now. He sees her talking with Ashido a little ways off, but he can't exactly register it.

All I did was run.

In the end, while Midoriya and the others stayed and fought...

...All I did was run.

Ochako stares, understanding but not quite computing. There’s blood, there’s Deku, and there’s bandages and there’s blood and it looks so wrong on his face. His eyes are closed and his skin is pale and there’s blood and there’s an oxygen mask and there are medics and people talking around her and there’s shock and fear and confusion because how can this happen how can this happen this isn’t happening it can’t it can’t it can’t I can’t I can’t--

Kirishima runs past her unexpectedly, and she follows on numb legs, although she doesn’t really register moving at all. Iida is beside her, but it takes her longer than it should to realize this.

Kirishima kneels, and Iida and Ochako sink to their knees beside him. It’s Kirishima who moves first, reaching out and closing his hands around Deku’s limp, pale one. And then Iida closes his own hands around Kirishima’s, and Ochako follows in suit. She’s shaking.

“Hang in there, buddy.” Kirishima’s voice is heavy. “Hang in there.”

Deku doesn’t answer. His eyes are closed and the blood stands out stark on his pale face, and it’s so wrong, because Deku is always so full of life and light and now he’s still, he’s too still. Ochako has a suffocating urge to sob and scream, but she can’t make a sound. Her eyes are dry. It still hasn’t clicked.

She doesn’t want it to click.  

All I did was run.

The medics come back and they’re forced to let go.

All I did was run.

The medics take Deku away.

All I did was run.

When the tears do come, they have no mercy.

Izuku is burning.

He feels like there are hot coals inside him, burning him from the inside out. It’s unlike anything he’s ever felt before, a painful, excruciating, scorching sensation that leaves him unable to breathe and wanting to scream.

He doesn’t scream, though. He can’t scream. He doesn’t have the breath to do so.

He wonders if he’s dying. If this is what dying feels like. It has to be, there’s no way he can survive and feel this way. It doesn’t seem possible.

“Hey. Kiddo. You’re not dead yet.”

It’s a woman’s voice. Izuku doesn’t recognize it. But, amidst the burning haze and fog of pain, he thinks he feels something stir within his chest--something much gentler and cool. Comforting, almost.

“You’re pretty close, but you’re not dead yet.”

Izuku swallows and squeezes his eyes shut. I don’t want to die. It’s probably the first time he’s ever thought such a thing. I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die.

“Yeah, I know you don’t. You’re not going to. You’re a lot tougher than people give you credit for, you know that? You have a strong spirit, you’ll be alright.”

Izuku isn’t sure if it’s literal or not, but he’s in too much pain to give it much thought.

“...You’re doing great, kiddo, just keep fighting. There are people waiting for you. You don’t want to let them down, do you? You risked so much to save them.”

Izuku never stops to think about who exactly he’s talking to or how he’s able to do it. Right now, hurt and confused and scared, he’ll hold onto any source of comfort he can get.

“You’re gonna be fine, just hang in there, alright? Hang in there.”

There’s nothing he sees or hears to indicate that the speaker has vanished; only the returning feeling of loneliness tells him that she’s gone. He wants to call out, to ask her to stay with him, but he doesn’t. An unnatural wave of exhaustion overwhelms him, and he lets go of his consciousness.

But, just before he’s dragged under, a name comes to mind.  

Nana Shimura.

He has no idea where the name came from or why it popped into his head.  He doesn’t know the name, but somewhere, in the back of his mind, he feels like he should.

“I can’t believe you.”

“I know,” Toshinori says.

“You insufferable, boar-headed--how could you not tell me something like this?”

“I know.” He feels numb.

“Don’t you ‘I know’ me!” Recovery Girl snaps furiously. “If you knew, then why didn’t you mention this sooner!?”

Toshinori doesn’t know how to answer. “The boy is...he’s...not comfortable with it,” he says, and it sounds like a dumb excuse, even to himself. “He doesn’t...I didn’t think it’d turn out like this…”

No one did. Not even Izuku.

“Oh, so you just casually forgot to tell me that the boy can eject his ghost!?” Recovery Girl shouts--not too loudly, but loudly enough to get his attention. “What made you think that was a good idea!?”

“I don’t know. I’m sorry.”

He doesn’t really know who he’s apologizing to, but it feels less and less like Recovery Girl.

Izuku is unconscious. He’s been unconscious for the past day now. His injuries aren’t nearly grave enough to land him in a hospital, but they’re still serious; he’s still on oxygen, and there’s gauze around his head and smaller bandaids over cuts on his face. Beneath his shirt, his ribs are bandaged, and an IV needle is buried beneath the skin of his wrist.  

It seems strange--Toshinori was engaged in combat with a monster specifically designed to kill him, and yet, all his injuries healed within the day he received them. Izuku’s injuries, however, have barely healed at all.

“...What did he do to himself for this to happen?” Recovery Girl asks him. The bite is gone from her tone (or, at least, some of it is), and she doesn’t sound angry anymore, merely...tired. Sad. “What happened?”

“...To be completely honest with you…” Toshinori’s voice is heavy, and it almost doesn’t feel like his own. “...I don’t know what he did. Young Asui mentioned he was attacked by Shigaraki’s Nomu, which explains his ribs and his head, but…”

That’s the thing. Broken ribs and a minor concussion wouldn’t be enough to keep Izuku unconscious like this. Recovery Girl’s Quirk strikes fast and true; if a concussion were the only problem, Izuku would be awake right now.

But he isn’t.

“His life is out of danger now,” Recovery Girl says, and Toshinori feels a bit of weight leave his chest--only a bit, though. “I assume he’ll be making a full recovery within the week, but...Toshinori, what he did to himself, it’s...this isn’t a joke. His life is safe now, but...it was close. It was way too close.”

The air is gone from his lungs. Everything feels so... surreal.

“Can you...tell me exactly what it is he did to himself?”

Recovery Girl nods stiffly. “His heart rate dropped dangerously low, first of all, and...his breathing was...he was barely breathing at all. It’s better now, but, whatever he did...it damaged him. I don’t know half of what I’d like to know about this boy’s Quirk, and until I do, there’s not much else I can say.”

Toshinori nods heavily. “The boy’s parents,” he says--anything to distract him from what’s right in front of him is good. “Have they been contacted?”

“I spoke with the boy’s mother a while ago,” Recovery Girl answers. “She should be here any minute now--”

The door bangs the wall behind them, and in tumbles a woman with vibrant green hair and matching eyes.

The resemblance is uncanny. Toshinori knows who she is before she even introduces herself.

(She doesn’t introduce herself at all, actually--she catches herself and sprints across the room to the infirmary bed where Izuku lays.)

He hears her sobbing, hears her whispering comforting mantras of “It’s okay” and “you’re okay” as she strokes Izuku’s hair off his face, and Toshinori turns away, feeling like he’s invading on some special moment between mother and son.

It ends sooner than he expects.

“What happened to him!?” Inko cries, and it’s aimed at both Toshinori and Recovery Girl.

“He’s exhausted,” Recovery Girl says. “I expect him to regain consciousness any day now, but--”

“That doesn’t explain what happened!” Inko says, and she seems more angry than sad now. “You said there was a villain attack, y-you said... h-how…”

It’s probably a stupid thing to do, but Toshinori does it anyway.

“It’s my fault,” he says, and Recovery Girl and Inko are staring at him immediately. “What happened to Midor--Izuku. It’s my fault. I take full responsibility.”

Recovery Girl opens her mouth, but doesn’t say anything--Inko turns to him fully, balled fists shaking at her sides.

“You’re All Might.”

It isn’t a question. She doesn’t ask about his appearance, isn’t confused in the slightest. She knows who he is, just like he knew her.

He nods. “Yes,” he says. “I’m--”

The slap comes as a surprise, but it probably shouldn’t have.

Toshinori flinches, but he doesn’t falter. He’s had worse--the slap stings, but that’s about it. It’s nothing.

“What is this, then!?” Inko questions, and her eyes are full of tears. He can’t tell if she’s angry, scared, or sad anymore--maybe it’s all three. “What kind of things were Izuku dragged into!? What happened to him!?”

“He and his classmates were attacked,” Toshinori says. He isn’t irritated, not at all. He doesn’t really know what he’s feeling right now. “I’m...I’m sorry--”

“What good does that do now!?” Inko demands, and Toshinori’s teeth snap together. “‘Sorry’ doesn’t…” She stops, chokes. “S-Sorry doesn’t help my son! He’s my son, you realize that, don’t you!?”

“Yes, I do. I’m sor--”

“If you apologize, one more time--!”

“Stop it!” Recovery Girl cuts in, and the argument (if you can really call it an argument) ends immediately. “This is an infirmary! You want the boy to be able to rest and recover, don’t you!? If you’re going to yell at each other, take it outside!”

It doesn’t sound like a suggestion. Silence covers the room like a thick cloud-- dead silence, Izuku would say if he were conscious.

He doesn’t realize it until now, but he really, really misses the boy’s jokes.

I’m sorry, is all Toshinori can think, both to Inko and to Izuku. I’m sorry.

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry.

“I’m sorry.”

Toshinori turns to stare at Inko, confused. They’re sitting on a bench outside by the infirmary door, where they’d decided to take the conversation while Recovery Girl checked over Izuku again.

“...Why are you apologizing?” Toshinori asks.

Inko shakes her head. “I shouldn’t have gotten on your case like that,” she says, “or...or slapped you--”

“Believe me, I deserved it.”

“--No, you didn’t. Y-You didn’t. I wasn’t thinking, I was just…”

“You don’t have to apologize to me,” Toshinori says. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I still shouldn’t have yelled at you,” Inko says heavily. “I-I know you care about Izuku. You’re…” She wrings her hands together. “...You’re worried about him, too. I...I know you are. I-I just, Izuku, he…” She pauses; for just a moment, a bit of light flashes in her eyes. “He’s the only thing I care about in this world. H-He’s my son, and I...I-I...I-I’m just…”

“You don’t have to explain yourself, I get it.”

Inko nods stiffly. “I want to be supportive,” she says. “I want him to be able to follow his dream and become a hero, but...it...it scares me. It’s...It’s always scared me.”

Toshinori looks away. “Yeah,” he says. “The life of a hero isn’t...it isn’t a safe one--”

“N-No, that’s...well, that’s part of it, but that’s not really what I mean.”

Toshinori turns to her again. She looks the other way.

“It’s his Quirk,” Inko says. “His power, his...his ‘Dissociating.’ That scares me. I'll...I’ll never forget the first time he did it. He was...he was four, and...and it was the most terrifying thing I've ever seen, him just... dropping like that.”

Toshinori listens, understanding. The first time Izuku dropped in front of him, he’d been thoroughly shaken, too. He has no idea what that’d feel like for a mother and her four year old.

“That...that kind of stuff sticks with you,” Inko goes on. “A-And I don't like him breaking his bones, either, I don't like him coming home with slings or crutches but...but he's coming home, still. His Quirk, the one he was born with...it can…” She stops and drags in a long, shuddering breath. “It can do this to him, and...if he pushes himself, like I know he will, I...I-I don’t know what it’s capable of doing to him.”

Toshinori has no idea what to say. He agrees; Izuku is reckless and stubborn, and he cares too much about others and too little about himself. After what Toshinori saw Izuku do at the USJ...he knows there’s nothing the boy wouldn’t do when it comes to saving the people he loves.

Absolutely nothing he wouldn’t do.

And that thought is terrifying.

“So you’re...All Might, then,” Inko says--an abrupt change of subject, and Toshinori is glad for it.

“Yeah, that’s me.”  

She looks at him for a moment. “You’re…”

Toshinori doesn’t lie. “I sustained an injury in a fight about six years ago that weakened me. When I’m not working as a hero, well...” He gestures vaguely to himself. “...This is me.”

Inko nods. He assumes, in any other situation, she’d be more shaken than this than she appears. Except, right now, Izuku is most definitely at the forefront of her mind, which means everything else takes lesser priority.  

Inko opens her mouth to say something else, but echoing, pounding footsteps swallow up whatever it was she’d been about to say.

Kirishima, Uraraka, and Iida sprint down the hallway, wide-eyed and frantic. They screech to a halt in front of the bench and turn toward Inko and Toshinori.

It’s Inko who speaks first, when no one else does. “O-Oh, hello,” she says, rising to her feet. Toshinori does the same beside her. “Y-You...you must be friends of Izuku’s, then.”

The three students look at each other briefly, then turn back towards Inko.

“Yeah,” Kirishima says. “I mean...we’ve only known him for a couple days, but…”

“That’s alright,” Inko says, and she smiles softly. “He’s told me a lot about you three, I believe--that is, if you’re Kirishima, Iida, and Uraraka.”

“Y-Yeah, t-that’s...that’s us,” Uraraka says, twisting her shoe into the ground. “A-And...and you must be Dek--I-I mean, Midoriya’s mom.”

Inko nods. “That’s me,” she says.

“So, you’re…” Kirishima raises a finger towards Toshinori, looking confused. “You’re his…?”

“He’s a friend of the family,” Inko cuts in, and she says it so simply and matter-of-factly that it’s impossible to argue with.

“Yagi Toshinori,” Toshinori says--he figures it’s alright for them to know his name, considering they don’t know he’s All Might. “Feel free to call me Toshinori.”

Iida takes a breath. “In that case...” He steps forward and bows lowly to the both of them. “I’m sorry,” he says. “I...I had a duty to protect Midoriya, not only as class representative but also as his friend, and...and I failed. I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry, too,” Kirishima says, and he bows likewise. Uraraka is quick to follow suit.

“N-No, d-don’t do that,” Inko says at once, and the three look up at her, confused but listening. “Please, don’t. If you’re really friends of Izuku’s, he isn’t going to like you blaming yourselves. I-I know it’s hard, but please, please don’t. If Izuku knew you were doing that, it would make him very sad.”

Toshinori isn’t entirely sure why, but he gets the feeling it’s not directed just at Iida, Uraraka and Kirishima.

His mind is full of fog.

He feels fuzzy, and he isn’t absolutely sure of anything except that there’s pain. It’s dulled; he’s probably on some kind of medication, in that case, but it’s still there, and it hurts.

He can’t really think of anything. He doesn’t know where he is and he doesn’t know fully what’s going on. It hurts, though, it hurts a lot, and beneath his confusion, he just feels extremely lost.

He wants to wake up. He wants to drag himself out of whatever this haze is, but he isn’t sure he can. He wants to, though, he desperately wants to. He wants to open his eyes, he wants to see his friends, he misses them, he misses them a lot--

“You’re a tough one, you know.”

“Hang in there, kiddo. You’re doing great.”

“You’ve got a long road ahead, but you’re off to a great start. Keep on going.”

“You’re alright now. You saved them. You saved all of them.”

“You sure made those villains run, boy. It was awesome. Ten out of ten, would watch again.”

“Your friends are safe now, thanks to you.”

“It’s okay to rest if you want.”

He doesn’t recognize any of the voices, but it’s...it’s oddly okay. He doesn’t hear them as much as he feels them, if that makes sense--he feels them in his mind and in his heart, and he doesn’t know them but they’re comforting. He isn’t unsettled or scared in the slightest.

Somehow, he cracks his eyes open. His vision is blurry, and he hears a dull hum and a quiet, steady drip, drip, drip. He’s in the infirmary, it seems, judging by the sliver he can see through his half-closed eyes.

His bell choker is on the side table, sitting there like it’s waiting for him, and he raises a hand. His arm feels like lead, but it doesn’t matter; he reaches over, and as soon as his stiff fingers close around his bell, he pulls it back towards himself.

He doesn’t put it on, of course, he just...holds onto it. The cold metal is another anchor, something he finds he longs for quite often. The bell is an anchor, a reminder: he has friends waiting for him.

He closes his eyes again, feeling less lost and more secure than he’s felt in a long, long while.

He isn’t sure why he thinks it or who he wants to say it to, but, Thank you, he thinks, and he thinks it from the bottom of his heart.

The answers come immediately. Seven of them.  

“You’re welcome, kid.”

“What do you mean? You did all that yourself.”

“You’re a brave one. You throwin’ that warp-gate villain around? Priceless.”

“No problem. I still think you’re too reckless, though. Gotta work on that self-worth there.”

“You’ve got the heart of a true hero, that’s for sure.”

“Go ahead and sleep for now, okay?”

“You’ve done us proud, kiddo.”

Izuku smiles tiredly and lets exhaustion drag him back under. His fingers stay closed around the bell.

Chapter Text

The next time Izuku wakes up, he can actually form coherent thoughts, which is new—he hasn’t been able to do that for quite some time.

He opens his eyes and blinks up at the infirmary’s ceiling. He feels numb and not entirely there, and a headache pounds at his temples, but it’s not bad. The pain he feels now is nothing compared to the pain he’d felt before; he can deal.

He still has his bell clutched in one hand, and he squeezes it for good measure. The metal is solid. He can feel it.

He’s alive.

He takes in a breath, steels himself, and sits up. A burning pain shoots through his ribs, and he winces and wraps an arm around his middle, but the wave passes quickly. For a moment, he sits there and breathes—then, he raises his hands and settles his choker around his neck again, clipping it in the back.

He lowers his hands and takes a look around the room. The oxygen mask isn’t around his face anymore; there’s an IV drip beside the bed, next to a side table. On the side table is an empty packet of something (Painkillers, Izuku thinks. Something Recovery Girl put in the IV), and his phone.

He reaches for the latter and opens the homescreen. Dozens of messages spring at him all at once; they’re all from the same person.

All Might.

Izuku stares for a long moment—then, he opens the phone and pulls up his messenger. Some of the texts are from yesterday; a couple are from the day before that; most are from today.

All Might
Young Uraraka gave me a book earlier.
I couldn’t put it down.

Izuku stares at the message for a long moment.

And then he realizes.

That’s…

...That’s a joke.

He smiles and scrolls down a little further.

All Might
How do you make an eggroll?
You push it.

Oh wow.

All Might
How do trees access the computer?
They log in.

All Might
What do you call a broken can opener?
A can’t opener.

There are more of them, loads more—Izuku laughs at some and groans and rolls his eyes at others, but he loves them all. He’s surprised by the sheer amount of them, though—when he finally gets through them all (and what a privilege it is), the jokes stop, and there are a few final messages.

These were just sent a few minutes ago, he realizes, then begins to read.

All Might
I’m not as good at this as you are.
Making light of situations like this, I mean.
I guess I’m too worried to genuinely do that.

Izuku frowns. And then, his fingers swipe across the screen, and as soon as the text is done, he sends it.

Izuku Midoriya
HEY GUESS WHO’S NOT DEAD
THAT’S RIGHT IT’S ME
DEATH THOUGHT HE COULD HANDLE ME,
BUT HE GOT SICK OF MY JOKES REEEAL QUICK
SO NOW I’M BACK HERE :D :D :D
WHAT UP??

He isn’t sure that’s how he wants to approach this, but...he doesn’t want things to stay the way they are now. He doesn’t want people to worry about him anymore—he wants them to be able to laugh and smile again.

So.

Izuku Midoriya
If you REALLY wanted to make light of a situation
don’t forget to bring a flashlight! :D :D :D
Ayyyyy
...HEY WHY ISN’T THERE A GUN FINGER EMOJI
oh wait hold on
[emoji.ghost]
I CAN DO THIS :D

There’s no response. He isn’t sure when All Might will actually get any of these messages, but no matter; Izuku keeps going. It’s nice to be able to text his mentor like this.

It’s nice to be alive.

Izuku Midoriya
Hey i found some cool emojis look.
[emoji.hand] [emoji.hand] [emoji.hand]
it be Shigaraki
gotta -hand- it to them for nailing his portrait
*insert gun fingers*
Hey why did Shigaraki cross the road
He didn’t he made Kurogiri warp him there.
*gun fingers part 2*
I’m just gonna keep doing this until you reply.
Don’t mind me~

Izuku Midoriya
[emoji.nurse]
Oh look it’s Recovery Girl
No hold on
[emoji.anger]
Now it’s Recovery Girl.
[emoji.skull_crossbones]
And this is me.
When Recovery Girl gets back.

Izuku Midoriya
Man I feel like a plank of wood.
Bored.
:) :) :) :) :)
Wood you believe it?
Ayyyy.

He’s typing something else (“I nailed that joke”) when the door bangs the wall to the far right of him, and his head whips around. He almost drops his phone in shock, fumbling with it for a moment or two until he has a secure grip on it again.

All Might—in his true form—is standing in the doorway, breathing like he’d run the whole way there. He’s holding a phone in one hand, his other hand pressed flat on the door from when he’d thrown it open.

Izuku grins and raises a peace sign briefly. “Heya!” he says, then drops his hand back to his side. “Long time no see, I guess?” He shuts his eyes and laughs shakily, rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand. “I mean, I haven’t seen you in a while but you’ve probably seen me. I’m sorry for worrying—”

All Might’s arms encircle his shoulders suddenly, and Izuku’s eyes snap open at once, the words getting stuck on a sudden lump in his throat. For a long moment, he doesn’t say anything.

“...I’m fine,” Izuku says, numb. “I-I’m really—”

“You scared me,” All Might says. “You really, really scared me, kid. Just…” The arms around Izuku’s shoulders tighten. “...Let me have this, alright?”

“...Okay.”  

He doesn’t move for a long moment. And then he hugs his mentor back and buries his face in his shoulder, his eyes burning with tears.  

They stay that way for a long time.

And then,

“Y’know,” Izuku says, “I actually got offered a job once by a window cleaning company. It was weird, though, ’cause they wanted to hire me as a ghost.”

“...Where are you going with this.”

“Well, I turned them down, anyway. It wasn’t something I could see myself doing.”

There’s a beat.

All Might doesn’t groan or sigh, just embraces Izuku tighter. “I really, really missed that.”

“What? My jokes?”

“Yes.”

“...I’m taking that as my okay to bombard you with them.”

“I have no objections.”

Izuku gives a shaky laugh. “Wow, you must’ve been really worried—”

“I was.”

Maybe it’s the way he said it, or simply how straightforward the words were, but Izuku’s teeth snap together immediately.

“...I’m fine.”

“You are now, but...you weren’t.”

Izuku bites his lip.

And then, he pulls out of the embrace. He isn’t sure he’s ready to let go and he doesn’t think All Might is either, but he feels like, right now, he has to.

“I’m fine,” he says, looking All Might in the eye. “I wasn’t before but I’m fine now. I’m okay.”

All Might doesn’t seem entirely convinced, and Izuku supposes he has every right not to be all things considered, but he nods.

“...Anyway…” All Might pulls up Recovery Girl’s stool and takes a seat. “...How are you feeling?”

Izuku takes in a breath and lets it out in a rush. “It’s been a rough past couple of days. I-I mean, I guess...I feel better than before. I have a headache and everything’s kind of...sluggish, I guess, but I’m doing better.”

All Might nods stiffly. “Yeah…I, ahhh...I met your mother earlier...”

Izuku stares at him, eyes wide. He thinks of his mother, protective and stern and the words that immediately flow out of his mouth are, “And you’re still alive?”

He didn’t mean to say it, but All Might doesn’t notice, and he rubs the back of his neck awkwardly for a moment or two. “Well...she did slap me—”

“Are you serious.”

“Yes, she did. She was extremely worried about you, my boy.”

Izuku looks away, biting his lip. “My mom, she’s, ahh...she’s pretty protective of me,” he says. “I mean, it’s not a bad thing, I-I just…” He fiddles with the blanket for a second or two, trying to think of what to say.

“It’s alright,” All Might says. “I’m not upset, believe me. She had every right to do what she did. Oh—” He looks up suddenly, like he’s just remembered something important. “I wanted to let you know, your classmates are fine. Worried about you like everyone, but they suffered no bodily harm.”

Izuku lets out a sigh of relief. “T-That’s good—” And then, he stops. His eyes go wide. “W-Wait, Aizawa,” he says, lurching forward, a dizzying feeling of dread washing over him.  “Aizawa-sensei and Thirteen, are they—”

“Calm down, calm down, they’re alright,” All Might says immediately, settling his hands on Izuku’s shoulders. “They’re alright. They’re both receiving treatment in the hospital at the moment, they’re going to be alright.”

Izuku lets out another sigh of relief—a longer, deeper one this time. “That’s...that’s good,” he says. “I’m glad…”

For a moment, he thinks about Aizawa. He’d been fast enough to stop Kurogiri from grievously wounding Thirteen, but he hadn’t been fast enough to keep the Nomu from smashing Aizawa’s face into the ground. When he thinks about it—when he remembers the sickening crack and the blood that followed—his stomach gives a lurch, so he tries to put it out of his mind quickly.

He can’t, not completely. He doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to.

“You gave us all a serious scare, kiddo,” All Might says, and Izuku gladly accepts the change of subject. “I’m glad you’re alright. We all are.”

Kiddo. All Might had called him “kiddo.” It makes Izuku think of something else, someone else, a person he doesn’t know but feels incredibly familiar with.

“Hey, All Might, erm...this...this might seem like an out of nowhere question, but—do you know anyone named Nana Shimura?”

All Might’s head snaps up, which is really all the answer Izuku needs. “My boy, how... how do you know that name?”

“W-Well…I-I…” Now that he thinks about it, it sounds crazy. “Y-You’re probably not going to believe me—”

“I will.”

“I-I mean, it sounds crazy even to me,” Izuku says. “I barely believe it, I just—”

“Midoriya, Nana Shimura was my predecessor.”

Izuku’s eyes go wide, and he stares, understanding but not computing. “S-She was...she’s—”

“She’s...she’s a real person who lived, and...she’s a real person who died,” All Might says, and there’s a heaviness to his tone. He’s quick to move on. “The world never knew her name, my boy, never. How do you?”

Izuku’s tongue feels too thick for his mouth. His head is spinning. Nana Shimura. All Might’s predecessor. She’s dead—

“B-Before,” Izuku says, and he fumbles over the words in his haste to spit them out. “W-When I was, I mean, I think I was dying—”

(He doesn’t miss All Might’s wince, but he doesn’t comment on it, either.)

“—I heard her, in my head,” Izuku goes on. “O-Or, I mean, in my chest, I-I don’t know. It was all pretty confusing, I-I didn’t really get it, but…”

“You…” All Might looks just as shocked as Izuku feels. “...You spoke with her.”

Izuku nods. “Her, and...and a few others. I think—I think there were seven of them including her? Yeah, seven. They were kind of talking over each other, b-but I mea—”

He stops.

Seven.

He’d never made the connection before now.

Seven figures he’d unknowingly summoned at the USJ.

Seven voices within him, felt more than heard.

Seven people.

Seven holders.

Seven real people who’d lived and died.

“...You’re kidding me.” The words are out of his mouth before he registers speaking. “You’re kidding me. That means...One For All, the previous holders, t-they...you mean I—I…I can...”

All Might stares at him. It’s hard to read his face.

“...Midoriya, my boy... your Quirk doesn’t make any sense.”

Izuku’s mind is blank. “Believe me I know.”

“Can you—talk to them still, right now?” All Might asks. “I mean—is there a way you could, or—”

“I have no idea,” Izuku says, his voice lowering to a sort-of whisper. “I-I mean, I could try, I guess—”

“No, no, wait,” All Might tells him, reaching out and settling a hand on Izuku’s shoulder. “If they aren’t already talking to you, wait. Don’t strain yourself too soon.”

Oh, yeah. That’s probably a good idea.

It’s hard to think about this all—Izuku’s headache goes up a notch, so he tries not to put too much thought into it. “So...the ghosts I summoned at the USJ, those were...those were the previous One For All holders, too.”

All Might nods. He, too, seems eager to move on to another subject. “Yeah. I suppose it makes sense—One For All is raw power, and when combined with other Quirks, it makes them stronger. I think that’s what happened before—One For All enhanced your own Quirk”

Izuku nods. He already assumed that much. “So, that’s why, on the bus,” Izuku says, “on the way to the USj—we went through a tunnel, and everyone started freaking out about my eyes.”

“Oh. Because they glow?”

“Yea—wait, you noticed?”

“It isn’t a very bright glow, but it’s hard to miss.”  

“Well, according to them, it was a ‘pretty bright glow’ back on the bus,” Izuku says. “They all started screaming.”

“Oh—well, if it’s a part of Dissociate, then yes, One For All definitely made it stronger.”

Izuku sighs. “Great. I’ve always wanted flashlights for eyes.”

“They can’t be that bright.”

“I know, I’m exaggerating. You know how people say ‘bright-eyed and bushy-tailed’? Maybe this is just me taking that whole ‘bright-eyed’ thing a little too seriously.”

“...”

“...Sorry, back on topic,” Izuku says, “how do you think...I mean, the previous holders...how did I summon them like that? And...why did it…” He glances down at himself briefly, remembers feeling like he was being burned alive. “...Why did it hurt me like that?”

“I have...a theory,” All Might answers. “It may or may not actually be correct, but it’s a theory.”

“Okay?”

“One For All is a physical Quirk,” All Might says, “but it’s also an extremely spiritual Quirk. Your thoughts, your feelings...they’re crucial elements when it comes to wielding the power. However, when you aren’t a part of your body, you lose that ‘physical’ aspect of One For All and are left with only the spiritual part of it.”

Izuku nods. He’s following so far.

“Now, tell me, kid,” All Might goes on, “what did it feel like? Summoning them?”

“I-I didn’t do it on purpose,” Izuku answers, turning away awkwardly. “I mean, I just...I wanted to save everyone. I didn’t want anyone to die, so...I just...I started running, and then I felt this...this weird rush of power, I guess. Sort of like—”

He freezes. In that moment, everything clicks.

“...Sort of like how I feel...when I use One For All.”

All Might nods. “Exactly,” he says. “Young Midoriya, I believe...when you use One For All as a ghost rather than as a physical person...that’s what happens. Rather than being strengthened physically, you’re strengthened spiritually, and the seven souls of the people who came before you...the seven souls of those who carried this power before you...you’re able to draw them out.”

Izuku stares down at his hands for a long, long time.

“...Why do I have to be the one with the confusing Quirk?” he asks desperately, more to himself than anything. “So, wait—if using One For All as a ghost summons the previous users, then...the physical backlash…”

“It’s like breaking your bones in your physical body,” All Might says. “If summoning all seven past users is one hundred percent of the power, then summoning one is, say, ten percent.”

Izuku’s head is starting to hurt again.

“Also, at the USJ,” Al Might goes on, “when you summoned the past holders, their bodies were...fuzzy, for lack of a better word. Distorted. Which brings me to believe you weren’t actually using One For All at full power. Maybe—seventy percent, or eighty percent. If you used one hundred percent, then—”

Izuku snaps his fingers. “Then they’d be summoned as ghosts like the one I turn into! Still, y’know, transparent, but with more defined bodies.”

“That’s what I believe, yes.”

“That’s cool!” Izuku says, beaming. “I-I mean, if I can summon them—even if I summon just one of them, I mean—I think that’s really cool! Maybe I should—”

All Might’s hand on his shoulder stops him again. Izuku turns and looks at him for a moment.

“...Wait?”

All Might nods. “Wait. At least until Recovery Girl gives you the all clear. And even then, my boy...we have to be very, very careful with how you use this power. If only around seventy percent was enough to do this to you...”

He doesn’t need to finish. One hundred percent would probably destroy his spirit— literally.  

“So...One For All,” Izuku says, if just to gather his thoughts out loud, “when I use it as a ghost, it...summons the past holders.”

“It would seem that way.”

“That’s…” Izuku pauses for a moment, trying to think of the word. “That’s insane.”

“Yeah. Don’t think about it too much right now, alright?” All Might reaches out and tousles his hair, mindful of the bandages around his forehead. “Like it or not, you’ve still got a ways to go before you’ve completely healed.”

“Yeah…okay.”

“Anyway.” All Might rises from his seat. “If you’re feeling up to it, you’ve got a couple of friends who have been worried sick about you. I’m sure they’d love to visit.”

Names come to mind immediately: Kirishima, Iida, Uraraka, Tsuyu…

Izuku nods, and All Might ruffles his hair one final time before turning back towards the door.

At the last second, though, Izuku calls out to him.

“I-I’m glad you’re okay, too, All Might.”

All Might pauses, hand poised towards the door handle.

“...Toshinori,” he says.

Izuku tilts his head. “Toshi...nori..?”

“That’s my name,” All Might says, turning towards Izuku again. He’s smiling. “When I’m in this form, feel free to call me Toshinori.”

Izuku blinks. “Tos...Toshinori…?”

He nods. Izuku thinks this over for just a moment; then, he beams. “I’ll remember that,” Izuku says. “Thank you, Toshinori-san!”

All Might—Toshinori—smiles and turns toward the door again.

“Also, Izuku.”

Izuku stops. It’s the first time All Might—Toshinori—has called him by his first name.

“...There are real, true monsters in this world,” Toshinori says slowly. “And you, my boy, are definitely not one of them. Please...I want you to promise me that you’ll never call yourself a monster again.”

Izuku’s breath gets stuck in his throat. There’s a long moment of blank, empty silence.

“...O-Okay,” Izuku says quietly. “I-I’ll try.”

Toshinori nods, satisfied, and leaves the infirmary. The door clicks shut behind him.

Izuku stares at the closed door for a long moment—and then, he flops back on the bed with a heaving exhale, his ribs and head throbbing. His bell jingles cheerily at the movement.

He shuts his eyes. He’s exhausted, but his thoughts are running rampid. He’s thinking about the previous One For All users, how he’d been able to speak with them before, how he’d summoned them without even realizing what he was doing…

He takes in a long, deep breath to calm himself.

“Is anyone there?” he calls softly. Within him, he’s trying with all his might, pulling at One For All without activating it. For a long moment, there’s nothing.

And then there’s something.

A small, gentle tug at his chest. A soft but deliberate pull. Voices fill his mind.

“Ayyy, lookie there! He lives!”

“Hello, sweetie. We’re glad you’re alright.”

“You scared the living crap out of Toshinori there, kiddo. Actually, I’m pretty sure you scared the living crap out of all of us.”

“Hahaha, you said living crap. We’ve all been dead for years.”

“You know what I mean—”

“Hey, Midoriya, my dude, my buddy, I have this great joke—oh hold on, I can’t remember—c’mon, don’t do this to me—I’ve been working on this for hours—”

“Daaang, your memory ain’t what it used to be. I swear, it gets worse every day.”

“I’d like to see how good you remember stuff when you’ve been dead for a few decades.”

“We’ve all been dead for a few decades. You ain’t special.”

“Agh, it’s too early for this…”

Izuku isn’t sure why he smiles. He doesn’t know any of these people personally, but he’s connected with them through One For All, so he feels more like he’s talking with old friends than total strangers.

“So, you guys...you all carried One For All before me,” Izuku says quietly, not because he needs confirmation, but because it’s a way of collecting his thoughts out loud. “And now...I can talk to you all…?”

“Apparently.”

“Dunno, kid, what do you think?”

“Oh, don’t be rude—”

“HELL YEAH WE FREAKING ROCKED ONE FOR ALL!”

“Can you please quiet down—”

“But...how does that work?” Izuku says, and the voices within him still. “I-I mean, earlier...when I was talking with All Mi—I mean, Toshinori-san, you weren’t there—?”

“Oh, yeah, kiddo, we were there.” That’s Nana’s voice, he knows that one.  

“I’m very sorry we didn’t say anything. We thought it would be best for you to have some time to think without hearing us in your head.” A woman’s voice, softer and gentler—like a worried mother.

“Believe us, we’re just as confused as you are, boyo.” A loose voice, male. He has an accent Izuku isn’t familiar with. “I’m preeeeetty sure what happened back at that crazy facility was One For All combinin’ with your own Quirk. The two finally merged together and formed this ‘bridge’ between us. That’s why you can talk to us now when you couldn’t before.”

“Duuuude.” A kid. He sounds young. Izuku wonders how old he is.

“Wellp, if that ain’t hella confusing I dunno what is.” Another woman, bold and loud. “Hey, Midoriya, you’re a smart one, what do you think about all this?”

“I think…” Izuku pauses. “...That I really want to go to sleep again.”

“Oh ouch, that kind of hurt me.”

“Y’know, kiddo, if you feel like you need to get some sleep, you can. I know you wanna see your friends, but they’d rather you rest and recover than push yourself to stay awake for them.”

He knows Nana has a point, but he shakes his head. “No, I’m fine,” he says quietly—he has no idea when his friends are going to get here, after all, and the last thing he wants is for them to overhear him supposedly talking to himself. “I’ll sleep later.”

“If that’s what you want, kiddo...”

“Sweetheart, you really are precious, but you’re still recovering from your injuries, you need to rest.”

“Toshinori, I’m sorry, but your kid is a frickin’ IDIOT when it comes to takin’ care of himself. I’ll have y’all know, back in my day—”

“YOU’VE BEEN DEAD FOR FIFTY YEARS.”

“Okay first of all rude, second, that is a LOW BLOW, KARIN.”

“THAT’S NOT MY NAME AND YOU KNOW IT, JERK.”

“W-When my friends get here,” Izuku says, and the voices cease, “I’m...gonna have to ask that, y’know...you guys just...stay quiet…?”

“Oh yeah, for sure, kiddo.”

“It’s alright, we won’t bother you. Enjoy your talk with your friends, sweetie.”

“No prob, dude.”

“We’ll just hang ’round—ta be completely honest with ya, boyo, none of us have a clue what’s goin’ on with you and your Quirk and One For All. We’ll keep to ourselves. If ya ever need us, though, we’ll be here.”

“Thanks,” Izuku says—and then, the door flings open. The tug in his chest disappears, as do the previous holders of One For All, and he sits up again and turns toward the door.

They’re there, in the doorway, frozen in place and staring like they’ve never seen him before—Kirishima, Uraraka, Iida, and Tsuyu. Izuku beams, and his heart gives a soft little lurch. He’d really, really missed them…

“BUDDY!” Kirishima shouts, and promptly hurls himself across the room, stopping only when his arms wrap around Izuku’s shoulders. The embrace is tight, almost too tight, but Izuku doesn’t protest.

And then Uraraka glomps them, and then Tsuyu, and then Iida’s arms wrap around them all, gentler, but just as firm. Izuku laughs giddily, tears burning his eyes, and he hugs the four of them as tightly as he can.

He really, really, really missed them.

They pull back all at once, and Izuku brushes away his tears. “I-I’m glad to see you guys,” he says, smiling. “I-I...I was worried.”

“Wait, you were worried?” Kirishima says, staring at him. “You. In the infirmary with broken bones and a concussion. Are worried. About us. People who are, thanks to you, completely fine.”

Izuku nods. “Yep.”

“Aww, Deku,” Uraraka says thickly. “That’s...that’s sweet, but—I mean, you…”

Izuku smiles faintly, then shakes his head. “I’m alright,” he says. “I promise, I know it was bad before—”

“You were puking blood,” Tsuyu says.

This brings on an immediate reaction from the others, like clockwork.

“YOU WERE WHAT!?”

“I-I’m okay now, though!” Izuku says immediately, waving his hands back and forth. The IV needle tugs at his skin, and he stops quickly. “I-I promise, I’m completely fine now.

There’s a long moment. The tension is so thick it’d take a chainsaw to cut through it.

Iida looks down suddenly, his hands balling into fists at his sides. “You lied to me,” he says, his voice heavy. “You said you were going to protect everyone, and you didn’t.”

Izuku blinks. “I-I did, though,” he says hoarsely. “I-I mea—”

“You were included in that ‘everyone,’ Midoriya.”

“...Oh.”

Izuku looks down. He isn’t entirely sure how he should respond to that.

“I...I-I’m sor—”

“Don’t be like that, Midori-chan,” Tsuyu interrupts, and she reaches out, settling her hand on his forearm. It’s the first time she’s said or done anything since hugging him. “We’re just glad you’re okay. But don’t do anything reckless like that again.”

She isn’t afraid of me, Izuku thinks suddenly. She saw what I did at the USJ, and she isn’t afraid of me.

“She’s right, buddy,” Kirishima says, reaching out and ruffling Izuku’s hair. “You seriously messed yourself up. Gotta stop doin’ that, okay?”

Izuku’s eyes burn again, and he rubs them with the backs of his hands. “T-Thanks,” he says—he figures, right now, his friends would appreciate his thanks more than his sorry.

They sit back and talk after that. His friends don’t ask about his Quirk, they don’t ask about what happened at the USJ; no, they talk about pointless, lighthearted nonsense—like classroom shenanigans, how they want to spend summer, pranks they’ve pulled on people in the past, accidental pranks they’ve pulled on people…

They don’t bring up the fight, and Izuku is glad. He’ll tell them all in his own time; for now, he’ll relish in this peace and warmth as much as he can.

And he isn’t positive, but he’s pretty sure that, as he talks and laughs with his friends, he hears one (or several) of the voices in his head go, “D’awwwwww.”

Recovery Girl isn’t nearly as mad as he’d expected her to be.

She’s stern, and she scolds him—scolds him for being reckless and not thinking things through when he ought to, scolds him for hurting himself—but after that, the anger is gone.

“I’ll yell at you more later,” she says, when Izuku mentions it, “when I’m not so glad you’re alright.”

Izuku supposes that’s only fair.

“But I would like to talk to you about something,” Recovery Girl says, sitting down on her stool. “Your Quirk. What do you know about it?”

“Oh, um...that’s a lot to go over all at once,” Izuku says, mumbling the last bit to himself. “Oh, wait, actually, I have a notebook at home. I’ve been documenting everything about my Quirk ever since I was little.”

“Have you, now?” Recovery Girl says, and he nods. “Bring that to me as soon as you can, alright? Your Quirk, as you now know, is extremely dangerous.”

Izuku looks down at himself, at the infirmary sheets and the IV needle in his wrist.

“...Yeah,” he says heavily, “I know.”

“Well, anyway,” Recovery Girl says, changing the subject, “because of what happened, once you’ve recovered some, I’d like to run a test or two. Nothing major—I’ll just have you leave your body here for a while so I can monitor your heart rate, your breathing, that sort of thing. That way I know what’s normal for you when you’re out of your body.”

“Oh, o-okay,” Izuku says, nodding. “Sounds good.”

She writes something on a notepad on the table. “I’m sending you home today,” she says, “but, granted you aren’t in pain, feel free to come to school tomorrow. You’ve been in this infirmary too many times, I swear…”

He’s not sure he’s supposed to hear that last part, so he doesn’t comment on it. “Thanks for everything,” he says instead. “I—”

“You can thank me,” she cuts in, “by not getting hurt like this again.”

Izuku’s teeth snap together.

He nods.

Izuku spends that evening at home updating his Disassociate notebook. He doesn’t include the information regarding One For All for obvious reasons—he can talk to Recovery Girl about that in person, but should the notebook be found by another teacher or his classmates, well...he’d be in trouble.

For the most part, the ex-One For All users don’t say much. They make a couple comments here and there, but nothing too distracting.

That is, until...

“Sweetheart, it’s a school night, and you’re still recovering, please go to bed—”

“I digress. The kid’s a MORON.”

“Dude, I get that a huge part of being a teen is staying up to ungodly hours, but this time, man, go to bed.”

“Kiddo, seriously, get some sleep. You’re pushing it hard enough as it is.”

“DAGNABBIT, GO TO BED ALREADY.”

“I’ll go to bed!” Izuku says, slamming his pencil beside his notebook on the desk. “Let me finish this page, alright? It’s really hard to do when you’re all yelling at me.”

“Oh, is that so?”

“Well then~”

“Ya shouldn’t’ve told us that, boyo.”  

Izuku takes up his pencil again. “I’m drowning you out,” he says. “This is me, ignoring you.”

“GO TO BED GO TO BED GO TO BED, BED, BED—”

“The fitnessgram pacer test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that—”

“Go to sleeeeeep, now and reeeeest—”

“Some. BODY once told me—”

“La la la la laaaa, I can’t hear ya over how FRICKIN’ STUPID THIS KID IS—”

“NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP, NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN~”

“Hey wait you haven’t had any water in a while, you should probably do that too—”

“THE YEARS START COMIN’ AND THEY DON’T STOP COMIN’—”

Izuku tries tuning it out and updating the notebook, but it’s hard to do when he has seven conflicting voices in his head all yelling something different, and eventually all Izuku can think is hey now, you’re an all-star, get your game on—

“OKAY, FINE!” he finally relents, slamming the pen down on the desk and closing the notebook. “I’ll go to bed, just stop!”

“Yay!”

“Nice choice, kiddo.”

“You really are too stubborn, dear. Just remember, your notebook will be there for you when you wake up. You can write more then.”

“Ya finally decide to take care of yourself, boyo.”

“Brings a tear to my eye…”

“Mission accomplished, my dudes! High-five!”

“...”

“...Or, y’know, we could not do that.”

“Seriously, go to sleep.”

“DRINK SOME DAMN WATER FIRST, THOUGH.”

“OkayokayIwill!” Izuku says, if just to shut them up, and as soon as he drinks some water (they won’t leave him alone until he does), he hops into bed.

He doesn’t go to sleep yet, though. Instead, he grabs his phone off the nightstand and turns it on.

“Oh no, oh no, he’s turning on the electronic devices, we’re gonna be here forever—”

“Kids these days and their smartphones, I swear. When I was your age—”

“I’m just sending a text,” Izuku says. “I promise I’ll go to bed right after this.”

“You texting Toshinori, kiddo?”

Izuku nods.

“...Hey, can you tell him somethin’ from me?”

“Sure thing. What’s up?”

Later on that night as he’s walking home, Toshinori’s phone goes off. He pulls it from his pocket and looks.

Izuku Midoriya
Hey so, I’m going to school tomorrow.
I’m bringing my ’Dissociate’ notebook for Recovery Girl.
I didn’t put down anything about One For All.
Just thought you’d like to know.

Toshinori
Kid, you should be asleep.

Izuku Midoriya
OH NOT YOU TOO

Toshinori
?????

Izuku Midoriya
The ex-OFA users have been screaming  at me to go to bed for like the past hour.

Toshinori
They’re right.

Izuku Midoriya
:(

Toshinori
No, stop that.

Izuku Midoriya
:( :( :( :( :(

Toshinori
Kid

Izuku Midoriya
Oh wait!
Nana wants me to tell you hi! :D

(Toshinori chokes.)

Izuku Midoriya
She says hello and wants me to send you this:
[emoji.heart] [emoji.heart] [emoji.heart]
She specifically said “send a hundred of them” but
HEY CAN Y’ALL STOP SCREAMING AT ME FOR THIRTY SECONDS
oh whoops I typed that.
sorry that was meant for the voices in my head.
Ok I have to go to bed, they’re all really mad at me now.
They threatened to sing “Let it Go” on loop for three hours straight if I don’t sleep now.
Bye! See you tomorrow! :D

[IZUKU MIDORIYA IS OFFLINE]

Toshinori stares at his phone for a long, long moment.

And then, he smiles softly and keeps walking.

Chapter Text

"Boooooooy that shirt does not match those shoes.”

“Those shoes don’t match anything.”

“Don’t listen to them, sweetie, you look wonderful.”

“Aw look at ‘im, off to go fight people. These kids, I’m tellin’ ya, they grow up so fast. Why, when I was a boy…”

“Dude, it’s been decades, get over it already.”

“Shut up, Greg.”

“That’s not...y’know what, I’m not even gonna try anymore.”

“Is this how it’s always gonna be with you guys?” Izuku asks, slinging his backpack over is shoulder. “Can you...c-can you maybe calm down? Let me have a normal morning, please?”

“Hey, the kid’s right.” Izuku breathes a sigh of relief and thanks his lucky stars that Nana is there as a voice of reason. “If we keep talking, we’re gonna end up messing him up in class or something. Not to mention it’d be pretty awkward when he’s talking to other people.”

“Guess you’re right. Sorry, boyo. We’ll be quiet.”

“Thanks,” Izuku says, and he puts on his choker necklace and bell, snatches his Dissociate notebook off the desk, and heads out of the room.  

Mom is waiting for him by the door, wringing her hands together. “Izuku, are you sure you should be going to school today?” she asks, concerned. “I mean, after all that happened...if you want to take a few more days here to rest…”

“She’s got a point, dude, maybe--OW!”

“Shut up, remember!?”

“Oh, right, sorry…”

Izuku smiles and shakes his head, ignoring the voices for now. “I’m okay, Mom, I promise,” he says. “I’ll come home if I need to, okay?”

She doesn’t seem completely convinced, and of course she doesn’t. When he’d come home yesterday, she’d been frantic, asking him a million questions at once and only calming down after hearing that, yes, Recovery Girl said he was fine, and yes, he’s sore but alright. She’d made him katsudon for dinner, a comfort food, and he’d thanked her profusely.

Now, she still has that same worry in her eyes, although there’s no frenzied panic like there was yesterday, and he can’t blame her.

“Mom.”

Izuku takes her hands in his, and as soon as she meets his eyes, he smiles.

“I’m okay, okay?” he promises, and he means it. “I’ll be fine, don’t worry.”

She bites her lip, then nods. “If you’re sure, Izuku…”

“I’m sure.” He pauses, thinks of something, then smiles again. “When I get home tonight,” he says, “there’s something I need to talk to you about, if you aren’t too busy.”

“Oh, sure,” she answers, nodding quickly. “Is it...is something wrong, Izuku?”

Izuku shakes his head. “Nope, nothing at all,” he says, beaming. “Just something about Dissociate and One For All that I realized recently. It’s really cool, I’ll tell you all about it after school.”

“Ooooh, he’s talkin’ ‘bout us.”

“Awww, shucks, he thinks we’re cool--”

“HELL YEAH WE ARE!”

“Shh!”

Mom smiles at him and nods. “Alright,” she says, and Izuku bends down to let her kiss his forehead. “Good luck today. And take care of yourself.”

“I will,” Izuku says--and then, the voices of the past holders are talking again.

“No worries, Mamadoriya, we’ll take care of that.”

“Ya hear that, boyo? We now have full permission to motherhen ya.”

“Hey, guys, aren’t we supposed to be quiet?”

“Crap, Greg, you’re right.”

“Okay, now you’re just being rude--”

“Well, I’m off!” Izuku says, turning towards the door. “Bye, Mom!”

“Bye, sweetheart! Good luck!”

Izuku heads out, pulling the door shut behind him.

He’s a tad late; he’d slept in on accident (he only woke up when one of the ex-holders screeched, “HOLY CRAP YOU’RE FREAKING LATE”), but it doesn’t matter. His teachers will understand, he hopes; even though Recovery Girl healed him, he’s still sore and exhausted.

The U.A. has never looked more intimidating than it does at this moment, as Izuku heads up the front steps and continues inside, toward his classroom.

Well, either the U.A. has never looked so big, or Izuku has never felt so small.

His friends hadn’t asked about it before, when he was in the infirmary recovering from his injuries, but there’s no reason why they wouldn’t ask now, and Izuku knows he has to tell them. He has to tell them the truth.

“Monster!”

“Creepy!”

“He keeps sneaking up on me, I don’t like it!”

“What a weird kid.”

“You can’t become a hero with a coward’s Quirk.”

“You can’t become a hero with a Quirk that scares people.”

He doesn’t want to. He doesn’t want to tell them the truth, he doesn’t want to tell them what he is--

“Kiddo, remember what Toshi said.”

Izuku stops, one foot still in the air. He’s nearing Class 1-A now; he can already see the door from here.

“What?” Izuku asks, once he’s sure no one else is around to see him talking to himself.

“I don’t know what you’re thinking,” Nana says, “but I can feel bits and pieces of what you’re feeling. You’re scared your friends will reject you, right?”

Izuku swallows thickly. His voice is small when he says,

“...Yes.”

“They won’t. Those kids adore you, Izuku, you’re just as much their friend as they are yours. You saw how worried they were about you when you were hurt, and remember, this was after they watched you fight off villains as a ghost.”

“But...t-telling them now,” Izuku says, his breath catching in his throat. “Actually...a-actually explaining what I am--”

“Stop calling yourself ‘what,’” Nana snaps, suddenly angry. “You are a human being, Midoriya Izuku, don’t you dare degrade yourself like that.”

There’s a lump in his throat now and he can’t swallow it.

“...Tell them, kiddo,” Nana says, suddenly much softer, and he can feel her smile. “Tell them all about you. Tell them the things you can do, tell them all about your power. They won’t reject you, I promise.”

“H-How...how do you know?” Izuku ventures.

“Because I watched them barrel into the infirmary to see you,” Nana answers. “I watched them barrel in there, and I watched them hug you like you were the most precious thing in the world to them. They aren’t going to reject you, kiddo, I know it. They love you.”

Izuku’s eyes burn. He opens his mouth to say something else, but the other ex-holders come back, loud and resounding and drowning out the rest of his thoughts:

“Knock ‘em dead, boyo!”

“Oh, but please don’t knock yourself dead, sweetheart, you have to stop doing that--”

“Go, dude! Show them what you’re made of!”

“YOU’VE GOT THIS, KID! I BELIEVE IN YOU!”

“You’re all way too chipper for eight in the morning…”

“If they do reject you, well, you never needed them anywa--”

“They won’t, kiddo. Just go in there, be yourself, and don’t worry.”

Izuku sucks in a long, deep breath. “Okay,” he says, raising his head. “I’m gonna do it.”

“WHOO!”

“AWESOME-SAUCE!”

“Please, never say that again--”

“Okay, y’all, time to shut up now and let the boy do his thing.”

“Alright, sounds good.”

“Good luck, kiddo! You’ve got this!”

“Talk more later!”

Their presences vanish within his chest, and Izuku covers the remaining distance between him and the classroom door. He waits for a long moment, his breath stuck in his throat.

Remember what Toshi said. That was what Nana told him. Izuku thinks back, searching--he doesn’t have to look far.

“Please...I want you to promise me that you’ll never call yourself a monster again.”

Izuku swallows, raises his head, and pulls the classroom door open.

His classmates--all nineteen of them--are there already, leaning on each other’s desks and chatting noisily with each other. He stares, watching; none of them look in his direction.

Oh, he thinks. That’s right, I’ve got no presence.

He has his bell, sure, but everyone’s talking too loudly to hear it. For a moment or two, he stands there, not entirely sure what to do. Should he say something? Should he go take a seat at his desk?

“Buddy, I know we said we’d be quiet, but you’re staring like a deer in the headlights. Stop worrying, you’ve got this.”

Izuku takes in a breath. He touches his bell, just for a moment, and remembers the day Kirishima gave it to him.   

“Good morning,” he says loudly--louder than he’d meant to, looking back on it.

The reactions are instantaneous and all at once; Kaminari lets out a shriek and topples backwards off the desk he’d been perched on; the shriek is echoed by a few other classmates, and they trip and fall and whirl around to stare at Izuku.

Izuku stares back, smiling embarrassedly. If there’s one thing he hates, it’s being in the spotlight.

“...Not dead?” he quips, and his smile feels forced and painful, even to him.

It doesn’t take long for his classmates to get over their shock, and then suddenly they’re all talking again, everyone at once.

“Hey, dude, you’re back!” Kirishima says, grinning. “I’m glad you’re okay!”

“Deku!” Uraraka smiles and races up to him; Iida follows with Tsuyu, walking. “Are you better now? I mean, your injuries?”

Izuku nods, smiling. “I’m fine,” he says. “I’m sorry for worrying you all.”

“Nah, it’s fine,” says Kirishima, waving him off. “We’re just glad you’re okay. Great to have you back.”

“They were telling us all about what you did at the USJ!” Kaminari chimes in unexpectedly. “You taking on the warp-gate villain like that so Iida could escape and go get help? That’s crazy!”

“Shigaraki,” Tsuyu reminds, “don’t forget Shigaraki.”

“Oh, right!” Sero says, nodding. “You scared off Shigaraki, too! Well, I guess I shouldn’t expect anything less from the dude who came first in the entrance exam, but I mean--man!” He shakes his head and whistles. “I really underestimated you! I thought, y’know, all you could do was break your arms, but…”

Here goes, Izuku thinks, taking in a deep, deep breath.

“That’s...that’s part of it,” Izuku says, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’d hate to break it to you--”

(There’s a long, collective groan, plus a couple cackles from Kirishima.)

“--But, yeah, that isn’t all I can do,” Izuku goes on. “I have, erm…” He’s planned all of this out ahead of time, but he doesn’t really know whether his friends will accept this as an answer. “...Ahhh...maybe it’d be easier if I just...showed you.”

“Um...okay?” Ashido frowns. “Go for it.”

Izuku sucks in a deep, shaky breath. He’s dreaded doing this since the day of the Quirk Apprehension test, and now he’s here, and he has to do it. He’s scared and he doesn’t want to, but he doesn’t have a choice now.

He drops.

It’s surprisingly easy; his nervousness makes leaving his body a remarkably simple task. His body hits the floor and his spirit hovers over it; Uraraka and Ashido let out a small shriek, and everyone else stares, shocked.

There’s a beat.

And then the panic starts.  

“HOLY CRAP!” Kirishima shrieks, leaping backwards. “Was that...was that supposed to happen!?”

“Midoriya!?” Iida kneels by his body on the floor and shakes him. “Midoriya, are you alright!?”

Sero and Kaminari run around in circles and eventually bash into each other. Ashido hollers that she's going to get Recovery Girl and makes a mad dash for the door. As for the rest of them, they’re all screaming and talking and yelling at once, and Izuku can’t make anything out clearly.

“W-W-Wait, no, I-I’m fine!” Izuku calls, and his classmates screech to a halt, everyone stopping what they’re doing at once. Their heads snap up towards the sound of his voice, but of course they can’t see him. “I-I swear I’m fine! Watch!”

He zooms back into his body; there’s a jerk, and then he’s back in his body where he belongs. He sits up; Iida’s hands hover by him, and his classmates swarm around anxiously.

“Holy…” Jirou starts, then stops and breathes a huge, heaving sigh of relief. “Dangit, don’t do that again. You dropped so fast…”

“S-Sorry, i-it’s, ahh…” Izuku rubs a soon-to-be bruise on his head. He really needs to stop dropping so suddenly like that, it’s not good for his health. “I-It’s a part of my Quirk, s-see. I-It’s the Quirk I was born with.”

Kirishima comes forward again. He looks more relieved than shocked now. “So, wait--you did that on purpose? You have two Quirks?”

“Umm, b-basically,” Izuku answers, pushing himself to his feet. Iida stands by him, ready to catch him if he drops again. “I was born with one, but the other one--the, ah, the one that keeps breaking my arms--that one’s...ah...it’s...it’s complicated. I got it a couple weeks before I came to high school. It’s some freak mutation, I-I think.”

Not really a lie.

“So that explains why you can’t use it without breaking yourself,” Yaoyorozu muses, cradling her chin in her hand. “Interesting. It never had the chance to develop fully so you can’t use it without inflicting bodily harm on yourself.”

Izuku nods. “I-I know it sounds crazy,” he says, “the whole...the whole ‘two Quirks’ thing, but--”

“Dude, our classmate literally has a bird head,” Sero deadpans. “It’s not that weird.”

Tokoyami frowns at him.

“S-Sorry, but it’s true!”

“He’s right, Midori-chan, it isn’t all that strange,” Tsuyu says, tapping a finger to her chin. “Todoroki has two Quirks, too.”

Izuku lets out a sigh of relief. Okay, okay, this is a good thing, no one’s suspicious.

Wait. Todoroki?

Izuku raises his head, and Tsuyu points. At the back of the class sits a boy Izuku’s only ever seen in passing, a boy with dual colored hair and mismatched eyes. He stares at Izuku with a flat, cold expression, and Izuku, for the life of him, can’t figure out why.

“So, wait, this other Quirk,” Uraraka says, and Izuku turns towards her. “The one you were born with, what is it exactly…?”

“Oh, my mom and I started calling it ‘Dissociate,’ or ‘Dissociation,’” Izuku answers readily. Anything to get off the subject of One For All. “Basically, I can leave my physical body as a ghost and float around like that. I can usually control it, but sometimes when I’m overwhelmed I just…”

“‘Tootaloos,’” Ashido offers, wiggling her fingers in a small, cheerful wave.

Izuku blinks. “...Basically, yeah.”

“So, when you’re a ‘ghost’…” Kirishima puts quotation marks around the word with his fingers, “can you, um, do you actually go through stuff, or…?”

Izuku blinks again. Honestly, he’d expected fear and shock from his classmates, not this... curiosity.

“As a rule, yes,” Izuku explains, fumbling only slightly, “but I can hold onto physical things if I concentrate. Like, watch.”

He slips out of his body again and Iida surges forward to catch him before he hits the floor. Izuku, as a ghost, pulls a notebook out of his backpack and raises it for his classmates to see.

“I can hold onto stuff, like this,” Izuku says, waving the notebook around; his classmates’ eyes follow it, like he’s hypnotizing them. “But I can’t do it for very long or it makes me sick when I actually get back into my body.”

He drops the notebook and enters his body again; Iida lets him go, and Izuku straightens up. His stomach churns, but only for a second.

“Nice,” Jirou says. “That’s pretty dang cool, Midoriya.”

“Seriously, though!” Satou says, grinning. “Think of all the stuff you could do with that! Stealth missions, sneaking around places, not to mention a great ‘element of surprise’ for people who don’t know it’s coming!”

“Oh, I get it now!” Kaminari says, snapping his fingers. “So that’s how you came first in the entrance exam! What’d you do? Did you, like, go inside the robots and tear them up from the inside, or…?”

“U-Um, yeah, that’s exactly what I did--”

“COOL!”

“That reminds me, Midori-chan,” Tsuyu says, turning to him. “At the USJ, when you went at Shigaraki...there were people with you.”

Izuku blanches. Oh...I forgot she’d seen that…

“Wait, really?” Kirishima asks, turning to him. “I didn’t know that. What happened?”

Izuku lets out a shaky laugh and rubs the back of his head. “I, erm, I may have accidentally...summoned some dead people…?”

There’s a beat.

“YOU WHO WHAT!?” comes the explosion, and Izuku takes a step backwards, waving his hands back and forth.

“I-It’s just another part of my Quirk!” he says frantically. “I-I didn’t realize I could do it until that moment, but...yeah.”

“Dude, that’s…!” Kaminari’s eyes are wide as saucers. “That’s really cool! I mean, freaking horrifying, but also super cool!”

Izuku takes another step back, overwhelmed. “W-Well, I can’t do it all the time. I-I mean, you all saw what it did to me, at least…”

“Yeah, that’s right,” Tsuyu says, nodding. “So don’t do it again.”

Izuku nods, but he isn’t sure he means it. All of this still feels unreal to him, to be completely honest. He’d been expecting fear and shock and horror from his classmates, but instead, all he’s gotten so far…

...Is curiosity. And maybe even admiration.

“You guys…” Izuku bites his lip, and all eyes are on him in an instant. “You aren’t...freaked out at all…?”

“What?” Uraraka frowns at him, looking confused. “Oh, yeah, I mean, we’re all freaked out, but it’s just another Quirk, isn’t it? And what you did with it at the USJ was super cool, too! Beating up Kurogiri like that...he didn’t know what hit him!”

“Literally!” chimes in Kirishima.

“Like they said,” says Yaoyorozu. “The Quirk itself may be unsettling, but that doesn’t change how we see you. You don’t have to worry about that.”

“If you were using your power to hurt people, that’d be one thing,” Iida says, straightening his glasses, “but, Midoriya...I’ve only ever seen you use this power to protect others. No matter what kind of Quirk you have, that fact alone is admirable.”

“We’re not gonna shun you just because your Quirk is creepy,” Jirou says casually. “We’re all aiming to be heroes here. And anyway, it’s not like you have a say in what kind of Quirk you’re born with.”

“Hey, y’all, let’s have a round of applause for my buddy here!” Kirishima says unexpectedly. “Fighting off the warp gate jerk and scarin’ off Hand-Faced McStupid Looking!”

“Hand-Faced Mc--”

Sero’s choked laughter is swallowed up by a round of applause, and Izuku stands there, staring, overwhelmed but oddly... okay.

“See? What’d I tell ya, kiddo,” Nana’s voice hums in his mind, and he can feel her smile, her joy. “You’ve got yourself some true friends, here.”

“HERE, HERE! Cheers to Class 1-A!”

“TO CLASS 1-A!”

Izuku eyes are burning, and it takes every part of him to not let the tears fall.

“...Thank you,” he says, rubbing at his eyes as his classmates clap and whoop. His voice cracks and breaks in a million different places, and a few tears run down his face. “T-Thank you.”  

Aizawa’s face is mostly hidden by bandages, and his arms are in slings around his shoulders. Izuku is shocked at first, and so are his classmates; Iida in particular stands up and asks Aizawa why he’s here teaching and not resting, to which Aizawa responds that he’s fine and then continues with homeroom anyway. He says there’s nothing to discuss and sends them off to their next class.

“Not you, Midoriya,” Aizawa says, as Izuku gathers his things from his desk and prepares to leave the classroom. “Stay here. There’s something I need to discuss with you.”

“O-Okay,” Izuku says, nodding. The others go on ahead without him, and he stays behind with his homeroom teacher. Alone with Aizawa, he feels suddenly intimidated.

“A-Are you sure you should be here?” Izuku asks hesitantly, the moment the door shuts behind the last of his classmates leaving the room. “I-I mean, your injuries…shouldn’t you be resting?”

Aizawa gives him a look--or, as best a look he can give considering his face is covered in bandages. “You of all people have no right to ask that question, Midoriya.”

Izuku bites his lip. Seeing his teacher now, covered in bandages even after receiving heavy treatment from a hospital...it leaves him with an empty, hollow feeling in his chest and sick feeling in his stomach.

Aizawa takes in a breath to say something, but Izuku barrels onwards.

“I’m sorry,” he blurts, before he can stop himself. “I-I’m sorry. At the USJ, before...b-before the Nomu, before he did that--”

“Midoriya.”

“--I knew something bad was going to happen, I-I could feel it, I-I just, I couldn’t, I tried--”

“Midoriya.”

“I couldn’t get there in time, I-I wasn’t fast enough, I couldn’t--I’m sorry, it’s my fault this happened to you, I’m sorry, I’m--”

“Midoriya, shut up.”

Izuku’s teeth snap together.

“It’s not your fault,” Aizawa says sharply. “The only thing you did wrong was charging into battle like some kind of madman. You’re a child, you don’t have to carry the world on your shoulders. Leave that to your teachers for now.”

Izuku takes in a breath, but doesn’t argue. He’ll always feel guilty about this, he knows that; even though the logical, reasonable part of him knows that there was nothing he could have done, the closer, more sentimental part of him screams the exact opposite.

“I want to talk to you about the Sports Festival,” Aizawa says, and Izuku raises his head and listens. “We’re planning on holding it in two weeks, granted you’re alright with that.”

Izuku tilts his head a little, confusion momentarily replacing the hollow feeling of guilt. “Why ask me...?”

“You were most affected by the USJ incident,” Aizawa answers, like it’s obvious. “Usually, if there were no student casualties, we’d hold the festival regardless of the situation. However, in light of what happened to you, if you don’t feel safe we’ll postpone it for now. So? What do you think?”

Izuku barely has to think about it. “I-I think we should still do it!” he says, nodding. “I-I mean, everyone looks forward to it every year, don’t they? Plus, backing down from such a big event now...the villains could see it as a weakness on U.A.’s part, right?”

Aizawa nods. “Alright, then,” he says; he doesn’t ask Izuku if he’s sure, doesn’t ask him for more clarification. “In that case, Midoriya, you might want to start planning your opening speech.”

Izuku stiffens.

“...Aizawa-sensei?”

“Yeah?”

“How hard would it be for you to launch me into the sun?”

“Not hard, but it requires more effort than I feel like using.”

“Darn.”

“Oh, also…” Aizawa reaches around and grabs a slip of paper off his desk. He presents it to Izuku, who takes it immediately. “A hall pass. Recovery Girl asked me to give it to you after homeroom.”

“O-Oh, thank you!” Izuku says, beaming. “I hope you get better soon, Sensei!”

Aizawa nods curtly. “Well, hurry up. You have other classes.”

Izuku nods, bows briefly, and turns and flees the classroom.

“Ah, there you are. Did you bring the notebook?”

Izuku nods, already slinging his backpack off his shoulder and digging through it to find said notebook. He pulls it out and hands it to Recovery Girl, who takes it and studies its cover--it’s a blue composition notebook with the word “Dissociate” written on it in black permanent marker.

“Thank you, Midoriya,” Recovery Girl says, smiling. “This is very helpful. Also, how do you feel? As far as your injuries go?”

“Oh, I feel fine,” Izuku answers. “And I’ve got you to thank for that.”

“Just doing my job, boy.” Recovery Girl sets the notebook on the side table, then turns to him again. “So, I’d like you to leave your body with me for now.”

Izuku blinks. “What.”

“We talked about this yesterday,” Recovery Girl elaborates. “Leave your body here with me for a few hours so I can monitor your vitals.”

“Oh, r-right,” Izuku says, “so...I should just…”

“Lay down, dissociate, and continue the school day. Come back just before lunch, alright?”

“Alright…?”

It seems strange, honestly--he’s never been asked to dissociate before, not that it matters. He hops onto the nearest infirmary bed and lays down, shutting his eyes. A second later, there’s a tug at his chest, and he opens his eyes in the air, out of his body. He’d been sore and exhausted when he was in his own body, but now, he feels oddly refreshed and rejuvenated.

It’s nice being a ghost sometimes.

“Thank you, Midoriya,” Recovery Girl says, pulling up her stool and sitting down at the table where she’d put Izuku’s notebook. “Go finish your classes. If I find out you’re goofing off and not in class where you’re supposed to be, I’ll hit you.”

“O-Okay,” Izuku says, nodding, even though she can’t see him. “See you in a few hours.”

Recovery Girl nods, and Izuku heads off through the wall--literally. He doesn’t like phasing through things, he never has, but it’s better than physically opening the door and getting nauseous.

“I wonder what Aizawa wanted Deku for,” Uraraka is saying when Izuku finally catches up to Iida, Kirishima and Uraraka; they’re killing time before their next class, taking the long way to the classroom. “I mean, you don’t think it was something bad, right…?”

“It’s fine, don’t worry,” Izuku says.

They shriek and spin around immediately, their eyes falling on blank, empty space.

Whoops.

Even though he’s hovering and not actually touching the ground at all, it is so dang easy to forget he’s a ghost sometimes.

“SORRY!” Izuku says, waving his hands back and forth, not because they can see him, but because it’s a habit of his. “Recovery Girl wants to monitor my vitals for a while so I left my body with her…”

“Oh, dear goodness…” Iida pinches the bridge of his nose, his glasses tilting slightly to one side. “Midoriya, is there...is there a ghost bell we can get for you?”

“Weren’t you originally against the bell?” Uraraka asks, turning to him.

“Yes, however I am also very against heart attacks.”

“I’ll--I-I’ll try not to scare you again,” Izuku says. “I’m really sorry…”

“Don’t worry ‘bout it, dude, it’s fine,” Kirishima tells him quickly.

“He’s right!” Uraraka adds, smiling. “It’s not like you can help it, I mean, you are a ghost after all!”

She said it so casually it’s almost comical, and Izuku smiles; it’s nice to be accepted so...so quickly like this. Nothing’s changed between him and his friends, nothing at all; they treat him exactly how they’ve always treated him, and…

...And he’s glad.

“Uhhh…” Kirishima looks around. “...You still there, buddy, or didja skidaddle?”

“Oh, no, I’m still here,” Izuku answers. “Sorry, just got lost in thought for a second...”

The school bell sounds, snapping all their attention to the fact that they’re going to be late for their next class, and they sprint--three running and one gliding--towards the classroom.

He tries, really, he does, but he ultimately fails: he scares his classmates several more times leading up to lunch.

Chiyo doesn’t quite know what to think of Midoriya Izuku.

The boy is self-sacrificing to a fault, and he won’t hesitate to throw himself into any kind of danger when it comes to saving others. It’s endearing, really; this boy has the truest heart of any hero-to-be she’s ever met, but at the same time…

She flips open the boy’s notebook. There are dates at the top of each page; the handwriting is messy, and a lot of it is scribbled out and replaced with new information.

Outdated, then, she thinks. He writes something, and if he finds out it’s incorrect, he scribbles it out.

The first entries are hard to read; Chiyo remembers the boy telling her that he’d started the notebook when he was little, which means he probably wrote this when he was around six or seven. She flips a couple more pages, skimming; most, if not everything, is scribbled out.

And then she comes to more recent pages. The handwriting is steadier, easier to read, a bit more organized. Things are still scribbled out here and there, but it makes more sense than earlier entries. She decides to start here.

SUMMARY:

[I’m surmising this now because all the rest of my previous notes are either outdated or just...impossible to read. So here we go. My weird “doesn’t make any sense” Quirk.]

For lack of a better term, my mom and I started calling this “Dissociate.” I’ve done research online loads of times but apparently there’s nothing else quite like it, so I guess I’m the first.

Yay.

Chiyo rolls her eyes, but keeps reading.

INFORMATION:

As a default, I can phase through everything. I hover anywhere between three five and nine fifteen ten inches off the ground.

Gonna test and see if I can fly. I cannot fly.  

I can interact with the physical world but it makes me nauseous/ill if I do it for too long. Anti-nausea pills help a little but not by much. I think I immunized myself to anti-nausea pills. Oops.

BACKLASH:

Highest temperature: 38.4 39.5 39.9 40.2

Longest amount of days bedridden: 1 3 4 6 9

Concussions: None ½ [reeeeeeally mild concussion]

Bruises: 2 4 9 12 17 19 23 27 Hella

Sprains/fractures: [See “hella”]

OTHER STUFF:

1) My body doesn’t heal from injuries/illness unless I’m in it.

2) Time limit: 12 hours. [Side-note: I don’t actually know if this is a legit time limit. Whenever I try staying out of my body for 12 hours, I end up feeling really suffocated and weird, so I always go back. I don’t know what happens when I stay out for more than 12 hours and I’m not going to fool around with it, either.]

Chiyo frowns at that for a moment. A time limit. The boy has a time limit. She makes a mental note of this before continuing.

3) I don’t feel pain as a ghost, but I feel pain when I’m back in my physical body.  

4) I have scars everywhere. Most of them are faint but they keep showing up for some reason.

Chiyo’s frown deepens. Scars?

5) I can leave my body at any time. I can’t leave my body if I’m in immense pain. Not sure of all the mechanics exactly but pain “grounds” me in reality too much to Dissociate. I dunno nothing makes sense anymore. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

He actually drew that, Chiyo thinks, shaking her head. This boy, I swear...

SCARS:

1) Two five twelve fifteen seventeen twenty twenty seven nevermind I stopped counting, just, “hella” again.

2) The scars only show up on my “spirit” and I don’t know what they are. But then again I don’t really know anything about my Quirk anyway so whatever, just one more thing I don’t know and probably won’t ever find out.

Scars on his spirit, huh. Chiyo has never heard of such a thing before. She wonders, briefly, if it has anything to do with Bakugou Katsuki.

For now, though, she puts it out of her mind and keeps reading.

EXTRA NOTES:

1) Injuries I receive while interacting with the physical world show up on my physical body. (Theory--haven’t been able to find out which way yet, but I’m 99% sure this is true)

2) My Quirk doesn’t make any freaking sense.

That’s all there is right now, plus a jumble of other notes Chiyo still has to sort through. For now, though, this information is enough.

She gets to her feet and turns towards the infirmary bed. The boy’s physical body is still here, and she has him hooked up with several monitors--specifically ones for his heart rate and oxygen levels.

She checks the monitors.

Her eyes widen.

Izuku returns to the infirmary just before lunch to retrieve his body and notebook (and his backpack, too--he’d left it there earlier, whoops). Recovery Girl is waiting for him by the desk, scribbling something down on a sheet of paper.

He doesn’t announce his arrival, just slips back into his body and sits up.

“Mornin’,” he says. “I’m back from the dead.”

Recovery Girl jumps, but doesn’t freak out like his friends had. “Here,” she says, handing back his notebook. He takes it from her at once. “You’re cleared to leave. Make sure you eat a good lunch, alright?”

Izuku nods, hopping off the infirmary bed and scooping up his backpack off the floor. “Did you find anything weird?” he asks.

Recovery Girl hesitates. “...That time limit you mentioned in the notebook?” she mentions. “Your twelve hour limit?”

Izuku blinks. “Yeah?”

“You might want to take it seriously,” Recovery Girl says. “From this moment henceforth, I forbid you to stay out of your body for more than eleven hours.”

Izuku frowns. “Okay…? I mean, I was planning on doing that anyway, i-it feels weird when I try staying out any longer than that--”

“Boy, I’m serious.”

Izuku has half a mind to say Hello Serious, I’m Dead, but he doesn’t. Now doesn’t seem like the time, and despite his love for making fun of his own grave situations, he knows when to stop.

“...Okay,” he says, “I won’t stay out of my body for more than eleven hours.”

“Good,” says Recovery Girl. “Now, go on. Like I said, remember to eat a good lunch, alright?”

Izuku nods, bows, then turns and leaves the infirmary.

Aizawa makes the announcement about the Sports Festival the next day during morning homeroom. Izuku’s classmates are, of course, excited about it, just like he is. The Sports Festival is a huge deal, especially for aspiring heroes; it’s a great way to throw yourself out there and show the world what you’re made of.

Along with being excited, Izuku is absolutely terrified. He’s tried and failed to write several speeches; they all come out sounding hollow once he’s done with them, though, so eventually, he gives up and just decides to make it up as he goes along.

A week passes. He trains with All Mi--Toshinori, that is, on Dagobah, and he knows his classmates are training, too. One week down and one week to go.

The Sports Festival is almost upon them.

And then, on his way to his next class with his friends, only six days before the Sports Festival--

“Midoriya Izuku, please report to the teacher’s lounge immediately,” Recovery Girl’s voice booms over the intercom, and Izuku and those with him jump collectively.

“Dude, what up?” Kirishima asks, frowning. “Something happen…?”

“I have no idea,” Izuku says, already turning around to make a break for the teacher’s lounge. “I’ll catch up with you guys later, gotta blast!”

“Okie dokie!” Uraraka says, waving, and Izuku turns and takes off. Iida’s call of “DON’T RUN IN THE HALLS!” echoes through his ears, but he barely slows down. It’s extremely rare for  a student to be called over the school’s intercom. Something’s wrong, that’s the only explanation.

He runs the whole way there, and as soon as he arrives, he barely remembers to knock before throwing the door open.

There are two people there--Toshinori and someone else Izuku has never seen before. They both notice his arrival (the door smashing into the wall is hard to miss), but Toshinori is the first person who actually says anything.

“Midoriya, my boy,” he says, rising to his feet, “this is Naomasa, a dear friend of mine and a detective on the police force.”

“Hello, Midoriya-kun,” the man, Naomasa, says, and he reaches out to shake Izuku’s hand. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”

Izuku blinks, then shakes his hand. “It’s nice to meet you, too,” he says numbly.

“He knows about One For All,” Toshinori says, answering Izuku’s unasked question. “Feel free to speak freely.”

Izuku nods, but his confusion isn’t gone. “What’s...what’s going on…?”

“I came to applaud you for your bravery at the USJ,” Naomasa says, smiling. “I would have liked to do it sooner, but you weren’t exactly in the best condition at the time.”

“O-Oh, it’s okay,” Izuku says, “I’m not...I mean, I didn’t do anything special--”

“You bought time and saved the lives of your classmates,” Naomasa argues. “I’d say that’s praise-worthy.”

“I-It’s not, believe me,” Izuku says, shaking his head. “I was scared out of my mind, there wasn’t anything brave about what I did--”

“It’s because you were scared out of your mind that what you did was so brave,” Naomasa interrupts, and he smiles. “Thank you, Midoriya-kun.”

Izuku’s head is spinning, and his cheeks feel too hot. “You’re...you’re welcome.”

“Also,” Naomasa goes on, “I’m here to assure you that we will have officers as well as pro heroes stationed throughout the grounds of the Sports Festival. Toshinori here was pretty adamant when he said you’d most likely worry about your friends’ safety the entire time, so I wanted to assure you personally that what happened at the USJ will not be repeated at the Sports Festival.”

Izuku lets loose a sigh. “That’s good. Is...is that all, or…?”

“Not quite,” Toshinori says. “Recovery Girl wants to speak with you about something as well. She should be back any minute now…”

On cue, the door opens, and Izuku turns around towards the sound. Standing in the doorway is Recovery Girl, and…

And a dog. Recovery Girl has it on a simple leash. The dog is black and white--a border collie, Izuku thinks, he’s seen them before. It’s wearing a blue harness; words read “Not a Pet - Service Dog. Ask Before You Pet Me.”

Izuku frowns, confused. “You have a service dog?” he asks.

“Not me,” Recovery Girl answers, shaking her head. “You.”

Izuku blinks. “I what.”

“I spoke with a friend of mine regarding your situation,” Recovery Girl says; the dog sits by her, waiting. “She works with service animals, and, well…they were going to drop him out of the service dog program, but I thought I’d give him a chance with you.”

Izuku blinks. “A...service dog...for me...?”

Recovery Girl nods. “Lots of people with fainting disorders get service dogs,” she says, “and your Quirk isn’t unlike that. With recent happenings and new developments of your Quirk that are hazardous to your health, well, it seemed like a good idea. He’ll be accompanying you at the Sports Festival and throughout your normal routine here at U.A.”

Izuku looks at the dog.

The dog stares back at him curiously.

Izuku tilts his head.

The dog mirrors the movement.

“He’s yours,” Recovery Girl says softly, and she smiles. “I spoke with your mother regarding this, and she was all for the idea. He’s already had quite a bit of training already, although there’s more we have to do, but, for now…”

Izuku isn’t quite sure how to respond or really what to think. After a moment, he kneels on the ground and stretches out his hand; the dog sniffs him, then licks his fingers.

Something clicks then, in that moment, and Izuku’s face splits into a huge smile.  The dog’s tail swishes back and forth on the ground.

“Also, feel free to name him whatever you’d like,” Recovery Girl says. “He is your dog, after all.”

Izuku runs a hand over the dog’s head; his fur is soft and thick.  

“...Howler,” Izuku says immediately, and he looks up at Recovery Girl, beaming. “I’m naming him Howler.”

A beat.

And then there’s a chuckle behind him from Toshinori, and Izuku turns his head.

“Of course,” his mentor says, smiling and shaking his head. “Of course you’d do that.”

Izuku beams. “I’ll take that as a compliment!”

Chapter Text

“It’s been a while since I’ve heard from you, Toshinori--”

“My successor is a madman, Gran, you have to help me.”

A chuckle answers this, low and gravelly. “Sounds like another One For All holder I know.”

“I’m serious,” Toshinori says; he’s sitting on the couch in the teacher’s lounge, alone, his phone pressed against his ear. “I love this kid, I swear, but he’s got no sense of self-preservation--”

“Again, like someone else I know.”

“--He can summon the past holders of One For All.”

Silence. It’s so quiet now that the sound of a pin dropping would probably hurt his ears.

“...The kid can what?”

“He was born with a Quirk,” Toshinori explains. “He calls it ‘Dissociate,’ and it  allows him to leave his body as a ghost. And, of course, One For All merges with the Quirks of its holders, and it merged with Izuku’s. When he uses One For All as a ghost...he can summon the past wielders.”

Silence again, for a long, long time.

“And I know it isn’t your job to teach him,” Toshinori goes on. “I know it isn’t your responsibility, and that as his mentor, it befalls on me to guide him, but I’m inexperienced, and this boy’s Quirk…”

“Yeah, I heard it on the news. Midoriya Izuku, right? That’s the kid we’re talkin’ about? The one who was nearly killed in the USJ incident?”

Toshinori’s breath stops for a moment. He thinks of Izuku, pale and still on the infirmary bed, an oxygen mask over his face and a needle in his wrist.

He shakes the image out of his head quickly, although he’s sure it’ll be back to haunt him later. It always is.

“His Quirk is dangerous,” Toshinori says instead, if just to distract himself. “Add One For All to that, and it’s even more so. It’s powerful, it’s far more powerful than I ever thought it’d be, but…”

“But?”

“...Recovery Girl ran some...tests,” Toshinori says thickly. “His Quirk has a lot of physical backlash as it is, even without this, but...she found out that the longer he’s out of his body...the slower his heart rate is, and the lower his oxygen levels are.”

A beat.

“His time limit is twelve hours,” Toshinori goes on, a lump in his throat. “Anything longer than that and...his internal organs will gradually shut down until they stop functioning altogether. It will…” Toshinori pauses, takes a breath.

“It will literally kill him.”

There’s a long moment of silence.

“...What the hell kind of Quirk is this...”

“That’s why I need your help,” Toshinori says, eager for a subject change. “His power is dangerous without the time limit, and I know he can learn more about One For All from you than he ever could from me. If you can help him control it, or learn to use it properly--”

“Yeah, yeah, I hear ya, Toshinori, I hear ya.”

There’s another long pause, followed by an equally long exhale.

“Well, sounds to me like you’ve got yourself one hell of a successor there. I can’t make any promises, but I’ll do what I can to help the kid. The Sports Festival’s tomorrow, right? And Midoriya’s gonna be in it?”

“Yeah.”

“Then I’ll watch him and see how he does, just so I can get a handle on what we’ll need to work on. This whole situation sounds pretty damn serious.”

“Yeah. Thank you, Gran.”

“Tch, don’t thank me. With someone as boar-headed and stubborn as you for a mentor, God help this kid.”

Toshinori has no idea how to respond to that, and he doesn’t have to--the line cuts abruptly, and he pulls the phone away from his ear. Gran Torino hung up on him.

At first Izuku isn’t sure what to think of Howler.

His mother is ecstatic, and of course she is. Apparently, she’d already bought a leash, collar and dog bed ahead of time, without Izuku’s knowledge; it made sense she’d be prepared, considering Recovery Girl had spoken with her ahead of time, but still, it surprises him.

For a little while, though, Izuku has no idea what to think about it. It’s not that he doesn’t appreciate it, he just...doesn’t really know how he should feel.

And then, one day, it just...clicks. Izuku doesn’t know what it is and he doesn’t think he ever will, but something clicks.  

He’s at the park with Howler at the time, throwing a ball for him, and while he waits for Howler to bring back the ball, he thinks about what happened at the USJ, what happened to him. He feels, vaguely, like he’s being pitied by his friends and family. Like he’s being treated like glass just because of some villain attack.

Except, he reminds himself, picking the ball up off the ground and hurling it for Howler again when he brings it back, it wasn’t just some villain attack. I nearly died.

“Try not to be upset about it, kiddo, you’re alright now.”

He sighs. He knows Nana and the rest of the ex-holders can’t see or hear his thoughts, but they can feel his emotions, and today’s been...kind of rough. He doesn’t know why, but things have finally started to click; what actually happened at the USJ, the fact that he’d come so close to losing his friends, the fact that he’d come so close to dying himself--

It’s now that he realizes Howler hasn’t gone after the ball.

His eyes turn towards the ground. Howler is sitting there, watching him, head tilted to one side. He isn’t wearing his vest right now; there isn’t a reason, considering Izuku took him to the park so he could let out some energy.

Izuku pauses, staring right back for a long moment.

Then, Howler steps forward and presses his nose into Izuku’s hand.

Izuku’s breath catches in his throat, and, without really thinking, he kneels in front of Howler. He’s sure he’ll have grass stains on his jeans, but he doesn’t care right now.

Howler watches him.

Izuku watches Howler.

There’s a beat.

And then, before Izuku registers moving, his arms are around the dog, and he’s hugging him tightly.  Howler doesn’t squirm or pull away, which Izuku is thankful for; he buries his fingers in the dog’s thick fur and hugs him as tight as he dares. His eyes burn with tears, and he closes them to hold back the floodgates, and he doesn’t know why but this is really, really nice.  

“...The dog was definitely a good idea.”

“Kudos to Recovery Girl.”

“It’s gonna be okay, kiddo. It’s gonna be okay.”

Izuku exhales shudderingly and nods, hugging Howler tighter.

When he gets home with Howler that evening, Mom is waiting with dinner.

“Welcome back!” Mom says, beaming at him as he pulls off his shoes by the door. Howler stands by him, shaking out his fur. “Did you have fun?”

Izuku nods, smiling. “It was nice to get out of the house for a while,” he says, raising his head to her. “Thanks, Mom.”

She smiles, nods, then turns and heads down the hall into the kitchen. Izuku and Howler follow her.

“So, the, ahh...the voices in your head,” his mother says absentmindedly. “How are they…?”  

Izuku is fairly certain that by this point, his mother is so used to the blatant bizarreness of his Quirk that she’s stopped being fazed by it. He spoke with her regarding the past One For All users already, and although she was surprised at first, she’s accepted it--just like she’s expected every other aspect of his more-than-a-little-confusing Quirk.

“Ayyy, Mamadoriya!”

“Tell her we’re doing alright, sweetie.”

“Say hi from me, man!”

“They’re doing good,” Izuku says, smiling; he crosses the room, opens the bottom cupboard, and grabs a can of Howler’s dog food out of it while Howler prances around him eagerly. “They say hello and that they’re doing well.”

Mom nods stiffly, like she’s still taking this in. “Izuku, sweetie…”

“I know,” Izuku says with a small, embarrassed smile, as he opens the can and dumps the food into Howler’s bowl. Under his breath, he murmurs, “You can eat, boy,” and then louder, to his mother, “My Quirk doesn’t make any sense.”

Mom smiles, her nervousness obvious on her face. “I wasn’t going to phrase it like that,” she says, “but, yes.”

“It’s alright,” Izuku says, beaming. He straightens up, tossing the empty can into a trash bin while Howler eats. “So, you need any help with dinner?”

“Nope, I’m done, I think,” Mom says, smiling. “I made katsudon again. Tomorrow’s the big day, right?”

The moment the words are out of her mouth, Izuku is overwhelmed by a lot of things--the Sports Festival, the moment he’s been waiting for, the day he can get up in front of the world and proclaim for all the world to see, “I am here!” (Or, that was how Toshinori phrased it, at least.) He isn’t ready. He doesn’t have a speech planned out, he hasn’t trained nearly as much as he wanted to, he has no idea what to expect from tomorrow...

But dammit, he’s gonna do his best no matter what.

He smiles. “Tomorrow’s the big day,” he affirms.

On his way home that night, Toshinori texts Izuku. Knowing the kid, he’s probably panicking about the Sports Festival; Toshinori wants to be able to say a couple encouraging words, if he can.

Toshinori
What’s up, kiddo?

Izuku’s response comes almost immediately.

Izuku Midoriya
Not much. Howler keeps stealing my socks.
He thinks he’s helping but he’s not.
Oh great, I think Nana’s laughing at me.
Aaaand they’re all laughing at me.
This is lovely, it’s like having my own little peanut gallery in my head.
Haha they stopped laughing.
That’s right you guys are the peanut gallery.
CRAP THEY’RE LAUGHING EVEN HARDER NOW EJKLJFKLSDf

Toshinori waits a bit to respond. Izuku texts much like he talks; get him started on something and he’ll go on all day.

Izuku Midoriya
Oh hang on I found my socks.
They’re in a pile by my shoes.
Howler I love you but can you not.
What were you trying to do.

Toshinori can’t help but smile. This kid, honestly...

Toshinori
That reminds me, how are things with you and Howler?

Izuku Midoriya
Oh he’s great, everything’s great.
My mom and I are teaching him to stay with my body when I dissociate.
He’s been doing really good so far.
Recovery Girl mentioned a friend already training him some and it shows.
I think my ghost freaks him out though.
I don’t think he can see it but I’m pretty sure he can sense it.
He’s getting used to it but still.

Toshinori
Animals sense your presence as a ghost?

Izuku Midoriya
Yeah I think so.
I should probably write that down actually.
Oh wait why did you text again?
Sorry I rabbit-trailed. :/

Toshinori
Just wanted to wish you luck at the Sports Festival tomorrow.

Izuku Midoriya
OH RIGHT.
THANK YOU :D :D :D

Toshinori
Do you have a speech in mind yet?

Izuku Midoriya
jrdkjgdgf
eorsidjfkf
jwieoajskl
jeiorsjdklf
skldfjklf

Toshinori
Oh boy.

Izuku Midoriya
brb gonna go die in a ditch real quick

Toshinori
? ? ? ? ?
Wait.
Kid if you leave your body in a ditch I swear.

Izuku Midoriya
I won’t i’m just.
I’m really nervous
I have no idea what to say???

Toshinori
You’re gonna do fine, kiddo.
Just get up there and be yourself.

Izuku Midoriya
“myself” is internally screaming right now
I don’t think that’s what the people want

Toshinori
Don’t worry about it. There’s no pressure.
Even just saying “Let’s do our best” goes a long way.
Plus you have all those puns of yours.

Izuku Midoriya
I guess…

Toshinori
Don’t worry about it too much.
I know you’ll do great.
Get some sleep, alright? Long day tomorrow.

Izuku Midoriya
Alright.
Night

Toshinori
Night kid.

[IZUKU MIDORIYA IS OFFLINE]

Izuku darkens his screen and flops backwards on his bed, draping an arm over his eyes. Dinner was wonderful--his mother’s katsudon is always top notch, and, stressed and worried, it was more comforting now than ever before. Izuku decided to go bed early tonight; Howler is curled up on his little dog bed beside Izuku’s own bed, already closing his eyes.

Izuku sets his phone down on the side table and reaches over, turning out the light. He lays there for a moment in the darkness, thinking--then, he grabs his Dissociate notebook off the side table and opens it. The green glow of his eyes light up the pages.  

“Huh,” he says, setting the notebook back down on the side table. “They do glow brighter now.”

“It’s like Toshi said, kiddo. One For All enhances your own Quirk, so it only makes sense that they’d be brighter now than they were before.”

“Right,” Izuku says, nodding. “Well...goodnight, everyone.”

“Goodnight, dear. Sweet dreams.”

“Tomorrow’s a long day, get all the sleep ya can, boyo.”

“You’re gonna do great, kid! I believe in you!”

“Don’t fret about tomorrow, ‘kay, man? You’re gonna do fine.”

“See you in the morning. Tell Toshi ‘hey’ from me when you see him, alright?”

“Goodnight.”

“Night night, Midoriya!”

Izuku smiles, then reaches over the side of his bed. His hand runs over Howler’s thick, soft fur; the dog licks his hand for a moment.

“Night, Howler,” Izuku says. “Big day tomorrow, buddy.”

Howler licks his hand again, and then, Izuku yanks his blankets over himself, rolls over on his side, and shuts his eyes.

Today started out rough, but ultimately ended well. He’s content.

He doesn’t recognize his surroundings.

It’s a city, dark and demolished and abandoned. The air is full of smoke and fog, and although his vision is blurry, he can make out buildings with blown-out windows and cracked, crumbling sides. The asphalt of the streets is torn to bits, cracked and definitely not usable. Or repairable.

There’s a man standing across from him in the wreckage, grinning, but Izuku can’t make out any other features. He’s too far away, everything’s too blurred, and there’s too much smoke and dust.

And then something smashes into him.

It isn’t a physical thing. It’s a feeling. An immense, intense feeling, unlike anything he’s felt before.

It’s fear. Fear and regret and desperation. The man is approaching; Izuku watches, first person. A fist that isn’t his swings out at the man; golden tendrils surge through the fist, orange and red and golden and twisting, winding, and a train of thought that isn’t Izuku’s screams please, please, please, be enough, be enough--

It isn’t enough. There’s a crash, there’s a bang, and Izuku feels pain. He feels pain, and he feels fear, and when he looks down at himself there’s blood, there’s so much blood.

I’m sorry, are the words in his head, thoughts that don’t belong to him but scream through his ears as though they do, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I’m sorry, I tried, please don’t do this, please don’t, I don’t want this, I don’t want to die, I don’t want to die, I don’t want to die--

The man is approaching. Pain explodes again and Izuku sees the man’s face, a beam, a smile, villainous and twisted and grotesque, the most horrible thing Izuku has ever seen.

“Your legacy is gone,” the man says. “You keep trying, all of you, no matter how many times you’re cut down. It’s going to be like this forever, you understand? It would be better if you gave up now...ended the cycle of pain and loss…wouldn’t that be easier than fighting? Wouldn’t that be easier than dying?”

I don’t want to die.

I don’t want to die.

I don’t want to die.

I don’t want to die I don’t want to die I don’t want to die I don’t want to die--

Idon’twanttodieIdon’twanttodieI’msorryI’msorryI’msosorryToshinori--

There’s fear and it’s drowning him. There’s fear and he hears screaming. He feels the scream in his throat but he’s not consciously making the sound. He feels it, he feels the fear and it’s too much, it’s too much, there’s so much fear, he’s afraid, he’s afraid, he’s so afraid and the figure is approaching and the figure is smiling and all Izuku can hear, ringing through his ears like a resounding war canon is

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry.

I’m sorry Toshinori I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry--

No, no, there's so much I want to say, there’s so much I want to teach him, please don’t do this, please don’t, don’t take me away from him, don’t, please, give me one more chance--

His vision goes red--

I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry please live on, live on, live on, live on, live on Toshinori live on, move on, please move on, please, don’t forget me but don’t let it haunt you, don’t let this haunt you, please, Toshinori, please, kiddo--

--then blurry--

I don’t want to die I don’t want to die I don’t want to die Toshinori I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I didn’t want this to happen I don’t want this to happen stop this stop this stop this, let me try one more time.

One more time, please.

Let me try one more time.

One more time.

Please.

One more time.

One more chance.

Please...

--then black. He hears a laugh, a chuckle, a villain, a murderer, a murderer, he’s a murderer--

...Please…

...Give me…

...one more chance…

...to say…

...goodbye.

For a moment, there’s dead silence. It’s like the world goes still, black overwhelming him.

And then he’s overwhelmed by excruciating pain in his chest, and he feels something snap and cut and sever and burn--

Izuku wakes up screaming.

He falls off his bed and hits the floor, the sharp pain jarring him back to reality. In his chest he feels burning, he feels like something’s been cut out of him, and it’s not real he knows it’s not real but it feels so real it feels so real it feels so real--

He barely makes it to the trashcan by his desk before he throws up. His throat burns and his stomach twists and his chest burns and aches and why does it hurt why does it hurt it was a dream it shouldn’t hurt why does it hurt why does it hurt why does it hurt so much--

He hears barking. Something nudges him. He jumps, chest heaving, bile in his throat, and Howler’s wet nose presses against his cheek. It doesn’t ground him to the world, though, he’s too out of it, everything feels shaky and blurry and there’s acid in his throat and then he’s throwing up again and Howler is barking and all Izuku can feel is fearfearfearfearfearpainpainpainpain and regret and fear and pain, regret, fear, pain, regret, fear, fear, fear, pain, pain, stabbing, cutting, blood, fear, tears, screaming, crying, pain, hurt--

--Death--

“Kid, KID, you need to calm down, you’re hyperventilating--!”

“Oh crap, crap, crap, crap, crap--!”

“Midoriya--Midoriya, you have to listen, I know it’s hard but you need to breathe, you’ve gotta breathe, buddy--!”

“Kiddo, kiddo, calm down, listen--!”

Fear, pain, fear, pain, regret, my fault, my fault, my fault, this is all my fault--

“Oh crap, those feelings, kid, no, don’t--oh no--”

“DROWN IT OUT! DROWN IT OUT, DO ANYTHING!”

“Hey Midoriya, you wanna hear a joke!? It’s really funny--”

“What songs do you like? We’ll sing something, I don’t know, anything--!”

Fear, fear, pain, regret, pain, fear, he’s scared, he doesn’t want to die, he didn’t want to die he didn’t, there were millions of things he wanted to do, millions, what is this, what is this, what’s happening--

“Oh, oh Mom’s here, oh thank God--”

“It’s okay, kiddo, it’s okay--”

Arms wrap around Izuku’s shoulders and he’s abruptly pulled back into reality where he belongs. He hadn’t dissociated, he’s still grounded in his body by pain and fear, feelings that keep him anchored here against his will, feelings he can’t fight and--

Mom is there, kneeling on the floor with him, hugging him. He feels Howler’s wet nose press against his hand and he lets out a sob and buries his face in his mom’s shoulder, an arm reaching out to wrap around Howler’s neck. He pulls Howler closer and his mom hugs him, strokes his hair, talks to him even though he can’t hear anything over the violent ringing in his ears.

He can’t tell if he passed out or actually slept naturally that night, but it doesn’t matter. He’ll take either one.

Izuku feels disgusting.

He showers, he gets dressed, he splashes ice water on his face to try and wake himself up, but he can’t. He has dark circles beneath his eyes when he looks in the mirror, and Howler won’t leave him alone, following him around and occasionally nuzzling Izuku’s hand for no apparent reason.

Today’s possibly the biggest day of Izuku’s life thus far, and instead of feeling nervous or excited, all he feels is sick, shaky, and overall horrible.

The ex-holders don’t know what he saw in his nightmare (flashback, a memory, he thinks--it was too vivid to be anything less). They’re worried about him, all seven of them, and they talk to him gently in his head, reassuring, soothing, never jarring (one of them spoke too suddenly once and scared him accidentally, and since then they’ve been very careful to speak softly).

Mom doesn’t want him to go to the Sports Festival (and he can’t blame her), but he talks her into it, even though his excuses and promises don’t sound reassuring, even to him.

“I have Howler,” Izuku says. “I’ll be alright, okay? I’m sure once I wake up some more, things will be better…”

Mom nods, but he can tell she’s still worried. He hasn’t told her about exactly what he saw in his dream, and he knows he never will. He doesn’t see a point. Details don’t really matter right now, anyway. His mother knowing exactly what it was he saw won’t change anything.

She kisses his head, tells him she’ll be watching on TV and cheering him on, and after she makes him promise he’ll be careful and nap when (if) he can, he leaves with Howler and starts towards the Sports Festival.

“Hey, Midoriya! Buddy! You made it holy crap you look like literal death what happened.”

Izuku knows how he looks--pale and sickly with dark rings beneath his eyes. Howler is still nudging him worriedly; he’s wearing his vest now, and Izuku has the dog’s leash wrapped around his wrist.

“Thanks,” Izuku says flatly. “I kinda feel like literal death. Actually, hang on--”

“No, don’t go ghost on me, dude, it’s fine,” Kirishima says, holding up his hands. They’re standing outside the stadium, surrounded by vendors, civilians, and heroes. “You look wrecked, though, what happened?”

“I had a really, really rough night,” Izuku says, shaking his head to clear lingering feelings of fear and pain and regret. “Don’t ask, just...give me some space today, okay?”

“...Okay,” Kirishima says. “Gonna be kind of hard to do, y’know, considering it’s the Sports Festival and all…”

“Just...try,” Izuku says. “I’m sorry, I just...I can’t deal with anything. Not right now, at least.”

Kirishima gives him an unconvinced look. “Well...okay, I’ll give you space. You need anything? Water? Maybe a snack or something?”

“No, I’m fine,” Izuku says--it’s now that he realizes Kirishima is completely ignoring Howler. Kirishima, as well as the rest of Class 1-A, know Izuku has a service dog, and Izuku has no doubt Iida and Yaoyorozu gave them all the proper run down of how to behave around a service animal. He’s glad. One less thing he has to deal with today.

“I’m gonna go drop Howler off with Recovery Girl,” Izuku says, while he’s thinking about it. “I can’t exactly compete with him, now, can I?”

“Right,” Kirishima says, nodding. “Well, good luck today, buddy. I’ll see you in the waiting room.”

“See you,” Izuku says, and they part ways.

Nana feels fear.

She feels pain, she feels fear, she feels regret, she feels loneliness, she feels longing. She feels what the boy feels, what Toshi’s boy feels, and although they aren’t actually her emotions, Nana feels broken.

This boy is hurting and he’s hiding it. He’s in pain and he’s trying to fight through it. He leaves his dog with Recovery Girl and Nana can feel his loneliness, she can feel his longing, she can feel his unspoken, desperate plea of don’t leave me alone, I don’t want to be alone, stay with me, but of course he doesn’t say this outloud. Instead he thanks Recovery Girl and bows and when he leaves his steps are heavy and his heart is full of pain.

He saw something.

Last night, in his dream, he saw something. He saw something horrible. Something full of fear and pain and horror, something Nana feels like she should know but doesn’t.

But even though she’s not positive, she has a suspicion. She has a suspicion and she only hopes and prays that she isn’t actually right.

Once Howler is gone, Izuku feels incredibly alone.

The past holders are mysteriously quiet in his head, and a part of him is glad but another part of him misses them. He doesn’t dwell on it for very long, though. He can’t. He doesn’t have time.

He finds Class 1-A’s waiting room in the stadium. The others are already there; Iida, Uraraka, and Kirishima are talking, as are the rest of the students. Kirishima hears his bell and looks up, and Uraraka and Iida follow his gaze towards Izuku. They smile at him, but say nothing. They don’t approach, they don’t ask questions; they smile and then they’re right back to talking with each other.

Izuku wants space, and he appreciates his friends giving it to him, but at the same time, a part of him wants them to talk to him. He wants to talk, he wants to forget what he’d seen last night, he wants to forget these feelings of pain and fear and sadness and regret and he wants to bury them far away where they’ll never touch him again--

“Midoriya.”

Todoroki.

Todoroki is approaching him, staring at him with an expression as cold and plain as always, and all Izuku can think is, no, not today, please not today, I can’t do it today, not now, not now, not now, stay away, I can’t, I can’t, I can’t--

“You’re the strongest in the class,” Todoroki says, and Izuku listens but doesn’t want to. He wants to run but he forces himself to stay grounded where he is, in his body, in this room. The rest of the students are watching, curious, and Todoroki goes on. “You came first in the entrance exam and took on the villains leading the charge at the USJ.”

Izuku swallows the bile in his throat, and suddenly within him, the sorrow and pain and sadness turn into anger, and he doesn’t mean for it to but it does, it happens and suddenly he’s mad, and his fists are shaking, and his vision blurs with tears and he doesn’t want this, he doesn’t want this, he doesn’t want this--

“In which case,” Todoroki says flatly, “I’m going to beat you. I have something to prove today, and I’m not afraid to leave you in the dust behind me.”

Izuku is shaking. He doesn’t know what he’s feeling anymore but something has snapped, something is wrong, he feels so wrong and disgusting and he hates the fact that all he can feel in this moment is anger--

“D-Dude.” Kirishima steps forward, puts a hand on Todoroki’s shoulder. “Now isn’t the time, seriously--”

“We’re starting the festival soon,” Todoroki says, shrugging off Kirishima’s hand. “Consider this my declaration of war, Midoriya. Today, no matter how hard you try...I promise, I’m going to beat you.”

Izuku doesn’t want to say anything. He doesn’t mean to say anything, but words flow out of his mouth, dark and spiteful and sharp and not what he wants, it’s not what he wants, it’s not what he wants but he’s hurt and he’s scared and he’s so very angry--

“Are you kidding me?” Izuku snaps, and Todoroki--as well as Kirishima and the others--actually step backwards. He sounds threatening, he knows he does, he knows he’s scaring them but he can’t stop, he can’t stop, he wants to stop but he can’t. “Are you kidding me? This is the first time I actually have a real conversation with you and the only thing you want to do is fight me?”

“It’s alright, Midoriya,” Kirishima soothes, or, he tries to. He ultimately fails.

“You wanna declare war, Thermostat?” Izuku snaps. “You think that I’m gonna back down just because you got in on recommendations? You think I’m gonna just stand down and let you beat me, is that what this is? You think I’m scared of you?”

He barks a laugh and it doesn’t feel like him, but he can’t help it. Talking and laughing have always been his coping method, always, and right now, he’s more alone than he’s ever been, more hurt than he’s ever felt.

“You wanna do this?” Izuku growls. “You wanna fight me, huh? Well, go for it. I’ll take you on, don’t think I won’t. You think I’m intimidated by this cold shoulder thing you’re giving me? Well, I’m not. You don’t scare me.”

He steps forward until his face is inches from Todoroki’s. Todoroki doesn’t move. The others do, though, backing off immediately and watching the scene from a slightly greater distance.

“You wanna fight, Thermostat?” Izuku questions, eyes narrowed, teeth barred. “Then let’s fight.”

Izuku feels like the worst human being alive.

He sits on the floor in a stall in the nearest bathroom, back pressed against the wall, knees pulled against his chest and arms wrapped around them. He rests his forehead on his knees, chest tight, head and heart heavy.

The anger is gone, and he feels utterly empty.

“...Kiddo.”

Nana.

“I didn’t mean to say that,” Izuku says shakily, squeezing his legs tighter. “I didn’t mean to say that, I didn’t mean to...to get so angry like that…”

“It’s not your fault. You’ve had a rough day, right?”

She says it lightheartedly enough, but he knows it’s fake. He wants to scream.

“I can’t do it,” he says, voice a broken whisper. “I can’t do it today, I can’t.”

“Yes, you can.”

“I c-can’t, I really, really can’t. I can’t go give the speech, I can’t give it my all, I can’t, I can’t, I-I don’t know what to do--”

“Kiddo.”

Izuku doesn’t answer.

“Kiddo, listen to me.”

He doesn’t want to, but it’s not like he has a choice.

“Take a deep breath.”

Izuku is barely listening at this point but he obeys, sucking in a breath through gritted teeth. He holds it for a moment, then lets it out in a long, heaving sigh.

“Raise your head.”

Izuku does. He doesn’t know what else to do.

“So, what do you see?”

“...I’m...still in the bathroom.”

“Yep. And you ain’t giving your speech in the bathroom.”

Izuku shakes his head feverishly, several lumps in his throat. “I c-can’t do it,” he says, then sucks in a breath between his teeth before continuing. “I can’t do it, I can’t get up there and give my speech, Nana, I can’t, I can’t do anything, I can’t do it, I can’t, I can’t, I can’t--”

“Kiddo. Breathe.”

Izuku does. It’s hard.

“Listen to me. You’re hurting right now. You’re hurting and no one understands what it’s like. But...it isn’t going to be like this forever. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you, Izuku.”

“B-But...N-Nana, I...I-I can’t--”

“Your future isn’t here, kiddo,” Nana says, softly but with authority. “It’s out there, waiting for you. But you have to seize it. You have to hold onto it with both hands and never let go.”

“I...I-I don’t think...I-I c-can’t, I just--”

“Breathe,” Nana tells him. “Breathe. Step back. Cry, if you need to. It’s not like we’re gonna judge you. But never, ever tell yourself that you can’t. You’re going to go out there, kiddo, and you’re gonna knock ‘em dead. You’re gonna go out there, and you’re gonna shine like the shooting star you are. You’re gonna go out there, and it’s going to hurt, but it’s going to get better. You’re strong. You can push through this. We believe in you, and when you blow the crowds away, we’re gonna be there, cheering you on.”

Izuku sucks in a breath. The pain is still there, the pain and fear and regret that isn’t quite his own, but it’s lesser than before. He’s still scared and shaky and he doesn’t know how well he’ll actually perform in today’s festival but...

“...I’ll...I’ll try.”

He can feel Nana’s smile. “Go for it. You’ve got this, kiddo.”

Izuku has a tiny stack of notecards he’d scribbled up last night. He never planned a speech, of course, but there were a few things he thought he could mention that might come in handy.

He feels numb when he returns to the waiting room with his classmates. The moment he walks through the door, an announcement summons them out into the stadium. The Sports Festival is officially underway.

Kirishima purposefully knocks their shoulders together as they walk down the corridor, and when Izuku turns to look at him, Kirishima smiles and gives him a thumbs-up. A second later, Izuku smiles back shakily.

The sunlight is blinding when they clear the corridor. Crowds roar through Izuku’s ears like waves crashing in a stormy ocean, and Izuku has half a mind to clamp his hands over his ears and leave them there.

He doesn’t. Instead, he follows his classmates and joins up with the rest of the U.A. students from different courses; General Studies, Class 1-B, the Support Course, all of them. People with aspirations and dreams, just like Izuku.

The pro hero Midnight steps onto the stage and holds up a hand. The crowds finally stop clapping and cheering, and Midnight beams at the group of students before her, baton in one hand and mic stand in the other.

“Welcome, everyone, to the first year round of the Sports Festival!” Midnight says, and the crowds clap and cheer again for a moment before falling silent to let her continue. “As most of you already know, the student who places first in the Entrance Exam gives the opening speech for this event, aaaaand...representing the first years this year...is Midoriya Izuku!”

The crowds explode, and for a second, Izuku stands, stiff as a board, his little stack of notecards clutched between his clammy fingers. He’s so stiff and on-edge that he doesn’t get the hint that that’s his cue to move until Iida gives him a small, prompting shove towards the stage.

He walks on legs that don’t feel like his own. Midnight steps to the side, away from the mic and the stand, and Izuku’s never felt so nervous and scared before in his life. He feels thousands of eyes on him, the eyes of his classmates included in that, and his hands are shaking, and his thoughts are jumbled worse than a thousand piece jigsaw puzzle.

He trips.

He catches himself before he falls completely, but the notecards go everywhere, scattering all over the stage and getting blown into the crowd by gusts of wind. He only hopes his handwriting is bad enough for no one else to be able to read them.

For a while, he stands there, and he knows everyone is staring at him, he can feel their eyes bearing into him, and he wants to scream and laugh and cry all at the same time.

But he doesn’t.

What he actually does is smile embarrassedly, rub the back of his neck, and say into the mic in front of thousands of people,

“Wellp, guess I didn’t play my cards right.”

There’s a beat.

And then, there’s a collective groan and sigh, and Izuku thinks he catches a couple cackles. Kirishima is on the freaking ground, literally rolling around laughing his head off, and everyone’s staring at him, some ashamed (like Iida) and some amused (like the rest of his friends).

Izuku suddenly feels less embarrassed, though.

He steps up to the mic. The crowds quiet and still, waiting for him to continue, and he sucks in a long, deep breath, then begins.

“S-So--”

A shriek of feedback cuts him off, and he jerks his head away from the mic. He hears sharp cries of shock and alarm, and he cringes immediately, wishing he could back off and go home and bury his face in his pillow and scream--

“Kiddo. Breathe. You’re doing great, we’re all cheering for you.”

Izuku’s breath catches in his throat, and his head snaps up. The crowds are watching him, staring at him, waiting for him.

And he remembers he isn’t alone.

Nana. The previous holders of One For All. Iida, Uraraka, Tsuyu, Kirishima, his mom at home, Toshinori, everyone--

They’re with him.

In spirit.

Pfft.

“...You know,” Izuku says into the mic, suddenly more confident than before, “...I’m just like you all. Everyone here, in this moment, in this day...we’re all fighting for something.”

Tenya watches, wide-eyed. He’d been worried before, when he watched Midoriya drop his notecards all over the place, but now... now...

...He seems like a totally different person…

“...Whether we’re fighting for a dream,” Izuku goes on, and he thinks about himself, young, dreaming of heroes, dreaming of hope and peace and justice and saving people. “...Whether we’re fighting for the people we love…”

Names come to mind at once. Uraraka, Tsuyu, Iida, Kirishima, Toshinori, Mom, his friends, the people he cares about…

“...Or, even if we’re fighting for ourselves,” Izuku goes on, and as his eyes scan the crowd, he sees Todoroki. He doesn’t know what Todoroki fights for, what drives him, but…

“...We’re all fighting for something,” Izuku continues. “We’re all here, in this moment, because we’re fighting for something. We’re fighting for something that matters to us.”

He doesn’t know where this burst of confidence came from, but he takes it and runs with it. Gladly.

“So, today,” Izuku says, raising his head towards the crowds. “Today, tomorrow, and for the rest of our lives...everyone, fighting for what means something to them…”

He throws his fist into the air, fist-bumping the sky.

“Let’s all do our best!” he shrieks, his voice an octave higher than he’d meant for it to be. “Everyone, together! Fighting for what we care about, fighting for what matters to us! Go beyond…!”

“PLUS ULTRA!!”

The shout resounds and echoes throughout the stadium; Kirishima leaps into the air and pumps both fists over his head; everyone claps and cheers and whoops, jumping and shouting, and in the stands the audience is on their feet, clapping, cheering, whooping and yaying.

Izuku beams, and he laughs giddily, relief flooding over him. He power-walks off the stage and lets Midnight take over, and Kirishima ruffles his hair while Uraraka cheers, telling him what a great job he did and that it was the best speech she’d ever heard.

And in his head cheer seven unheard, unseen beings, screaming that “THAT’S MY BOY!” and “WE’RE SO PROUD OF YOU, IZUKU!” and then, Nana’s voice, quiet, but somehow more distinct than all the others:

“See? What’d I tell ya, kiddo.”

And Izuku laughs again, giddy with relief and overwhelmed with something that, for once today, isn’t pain or fear or sadness.

He’s fairly certain it’s joy.

Chapter Text

Izuku isn’t quite sure what to think about Todoroki Shouto.

When he has time to think about it, as he and the other students gather for the first event of the Sports Festival (an obstacle race--there are always two preliminary rounds, different each year, to eliminate the majority of the students so they have less people to work with for the one-on-one matches), he feels horribly guilty. He hadn’t had the best first-impression of Todoroki, and now, thanks to his explosion, Todoroki hadn’t had a good first impression of him, either.

“Gah, it ain’t your fault, boyo. The kid should’ve read the situation better, you aren’t to blame for snappin’ at him like that.”

“I know,” Izuku says under his breath so the students around him can’t hear, “I just...I feel…”

He feels horrible, that’s what. It’s the Sports Festival, of course they’re going to be declaring war on each other left and right. There was no reason for him to be aggressive toward Todoroki like that, no reason at all--

“Kiddo. Cut it out.”

“Yeah, dude, it isn’t your fault. You had a rough night, and today hasn’t really been the best so far. It’s fine that you’re upset, we get it.”

“I know,” Izuku says again, “but...still…”

He thinks about it, considers that look in Todoroki’s eyes. He doesn’t know anything about Todoroki other than he got in on recommendations and that his father is Endeavor, the number two hero, but...

I have something to prove today, Todoroki had said, and Izuku wonders what that could be. Todoroki seems...cold. Stoic. He doesn’t look angry nor happy, neither thrilled nor displeased, just...flat. And Izuku finds himself wondering why, because Todoroki hadn’t been born like that.

Something must’ve happened.

“Hey. Deku.”

Izuku flinches instinctively, then turns. Bakugou is staring at him, standing just a little ways off.

“Ooooh. It’s him.”

“Yo, kiddo, punch him in the face.”

“No, don’t do that, he could get in trouble--”

“Okay, fine. Make it look like an accident.”

“Oh dear--”

“What the hell was that speech, anyway?” Bakugou snaps, and Izuku’s head jerks up, his mind brought back to the present. “You could barely stand on your own two feet up there. It was pathetic.”

Izuku takes in a long, deep breath through his nose. The world is just out to get him today, isn’t it? He’s mostly forgiven Todoroki; after all, Todoroki wasn’t intentionally trying to be aggressive. It was a declaration of war, sure, but it wasn’t meant to be a violent one.

Bakugou is violent, though. He’s intentionally trying to be aggressive here.

Izuku turns to him. His day thus far has been so stress-filled and overall awful that it’s kind of turned around into an odd sense of tranquility, like it’s come in full circle. He’s had enough, he’s passed his limit, and he cannot deal with this anymore.

He’s done.

“I’m sorry, Bakugou,” Izuku says, putting a hand on his hip and cocking his head one way. “Which of us came first in the entrance exam, again?”

“Ooooooooooh--”

“Take that, Bakubrat.”

“Guys, we should probably be quiet, remember?”

“Oh, right, right--”

Bakugou snarls at him. “You can think whatever you wanna think,” he growls. “You placing in that entrance exam like you did was a total fluke, anyway. There’s no way you actually did it.”

“Or,” Izuku says, “maybe there’s just no way you can look past your ego long enough to accept that I did.”

“OOOOOOOOOOOOOOH--”

“Shhhh!”

“Whatever,” Bakugou snaps. “At least my Quirk doesn’t scare people.”

The ex-holders riot immediately, everyone shouting and yelling profanities and threats at once, but it’s all too jumbled for Izuku to make out. Instead of trying to make sense of it, he sucks in a sharp breath and looks Bakugou in the eyes.

“...You’re right. You can do that without a Quirk.”

The voices in his head have nothing to say to that, and Izuku turns and keeps walking. He doesn’t look back at Bakugou once, and a part of him is afraid of what would happen if he does.

“...Kid? Are you okay?”

“...Yeah,” Izuku says, swallowing thickly. “I’m okay.”

He’s lying.

Everything sucks.

Izuku stumbles more than runs as he charges alongside the other students across the obstacle course. His thoughts are jumbled and his limbs feel heavy; his speech had gone better than expected, but he still feels insanely shaky, not to mention Bakugou approaching him like that--

“You’ve got this, kiddo! Remember, shine like the shooting star you are! Show everyone what you can do!”

“You go, kid!”

“Go, go, go!”

“We need a cheerleading squad!”

“No, we really, really don’t--”

“GIVE ME AN ‘M’!”

“Please don’t--”

The monologue continues, but somehow it helps. Izuku’s own desperate, panicked thoughts are drowned out by the encouraging voices of the past holders, and he gladly takes the distraction.

He runs faster than before.

“Why’d you grab that hunk of metal again?”

“Couldn’t you just YEET out of your body and get to the finish line that way?”

“I could,” Izuku gasps, struggling along and hauling a sheet of metal from one of the robots with him, “but I’d get trampled pretty quick if I did that, y’know? It’d be pretty stupid in an event like this…”

“Sorry to burst your bubble, boyo, but you ain’t beyond doin’ stupid things.”

“...Fair.”

The ex-holders fall silent once again, only shouting an encouraging word here and there, and Izuku struggles onwards. Todoroki and Bakugou are up ahead, far up ahead, and while Izuku still feels guilty over how he treated Todoroki, well, he isn’t going to back down.

He runs faster. There are people counting on him, cheering him on, people like Mom and Toshinori and the past holders of One For All.

He’s going to do it. He’s going to do his best.

The land mines are greeeeeeat.

Izuku has a plan, though. It isn’t a good plan and it isn’t fool-proof in the slightest; in fact, it’s probably one of the dumbest things he’s ever done (second to going up against Shigaraki at the USJ, of course).

With the sheet of metal, he begins to--carefully--dig up the landmines.

“Whatcha doin’, boyo?”

“Oh, oh those are landmines, oh dear, oh dear--”

“HELL YEAH BLOW ‘EM UP, KID!”

“Are you sure we should be encouraging this--?”

Izuku takes a couple steps backwards, holding the sheet of metal in front of him, and then he takes a running start towards the pile of landmines he’d gathered, and his feet leave the ground as he leaps--

“WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING, I SAID BLOW THEM UP, NOT--!”

The sheet of metal slams into the landmines, setting them all off at once, and Izuku blasts into the sky.

It works...better than expected. There’s wind in his face and hair as he shoots over the mines, over his classmates, over other students, over the entire field, over the two students in the lead.

He’s in first place.  

He looks back over his shoulder as the momentum carries him away. He sees Todoroki’s stunned face and Bakugou’s furious expression, and he wants to laugh.

He doesn’t, though.

Instead, he grins, salutes, and shouts, “SEE YA AT THE FINISH LINE, BLOWHARD! THERMOSTAT!”

It’s stupid. It’s petty. And he’ll probably feel bad about it in like an hour.

But he’s had a really, really long day, and he can’t bring himself to care right now.  

Somehow, he manages to come in first place in the obstacle course.

The crowds roar and clap and cheer for him, and of course they do--Izuku’s in the spotlight again, but for once he doesn’t try to shy out of it. He’s earned this.

He smiles.

There’s no breathing room; as soon as the rest of the competitors have returned from the course, Midnight steps up again and spins the randomizer wheel to decide their next match.  

He isn’t quite sure his dissociation will help him all that much, considering the one-on-one fights and whatnot; technically, if his opponent yanks his physical body out of bounds, ghost or no, he’s still out of bounds.

So. That’s something to think about.

But of course, he’ll deal with that when the time comes--for now, he has to think about the second event. A cavalry battle. A cavalry battle, okay, he can probably do something with this. He has to be able to do something with this--

And then he’s screwed over by the whole “ten million points” thing. Which only makes sense, because of course victory doesn’t come without some kind of sacrifice. He wonders, briefly, how hard it would be to just have a normal day for once.

He gets together a team for the cavalry battle, somehow--it’s made up of Uraraka (and thank goodness for her), Tokoyami, and an over-eager, flamboyant girl named Hatsume Mei from the Support Course.

The rules of the cavalry battle are simple: keep your own headband around your head, put the ones you steal around your neck, and don’t let the “rider” of the cavalry team (in this case, the rider is Izuku) touch the ground.

They have their team. Izuku straps the 10,000,000 point headband around his forehead, securing it with velcro. Afterwards, he runs his thumb over the smooth metal of his bell; he doesn’t remember when he started doing this as a way of calming himself, but it works.

“TIME’S UP!” Midnight says, thrusting her baton into the air above her head. “Hope you kiddies have your teams ready, because the fight won’t wait for you!”  

The buzzer sounds, and the cavalry battle begins.

And of course everyone immediately goes for Izuku and the 10,000,000 points. Because of course, why wouldn’t they go for him and the 10,000,000 points?

Just once, Izuku thinks, as Uraraka blasts them into the air with Hatsume’s rocket boots and Izuku flicks on his borrowed jetpack to propel them upwards. Just once, can I have a victory without immediately getting stabbed in the back?

Team Todoroki stole the 10,000,000 points.

It was Iida’s special move that got them it; one moment, Izuku and his teammates were staring their team down, and the next moment the team was gone, and so were the 10,000,000 points.

And now Todoroki and his team are on the other side of the arena, and Izuku and his own team are left with no points at all.

We’re running out of time, Izuku thinks frantically; behind him and around him, the other teams are duking it out, fighting for the headbands. After all, even if they can’t come in first, they only need to make the top four in order to move on. We’re running out of time and--

And right now we have zero points.

He grits his teeth. They don’t have time. They don’t have time. They don’t--

“Take a breather, you’ve got this. Think it through.”

Izuku sucks in a sharp breath; he hadn’t realized he’d been holding it. He raises his head and sets his eyes on Todoroki and his team, specifically on the headbands, flipped backwards to hide their numbers, around his neck.

One shot, Izuku thinks, gritting his teeth. We have one more shot and then it’s over.

One more shot, one more chance.

And…

“Uraraka, Tokoyami, you guys,” Izuku says, narrowing his eyes “get in close. Don’t let my body touch the ground.”

“Don’t let your what?” Hatsume asks, but there’s no time to answer. The clock is ticking and they’re running out of time.

They charge. Izuku grits his teeth tighter; Todoroki puts out his right arm, ready to attack. One chance. One moment. One shot.

And Izuku isn’t going to throw it away.

Izuku fires up One For All. He doesn’t throw the punch, doesn’t do any of that; it’s a distraction, something to keep Todoroki focused on that and not what he’s about to do--

“Wait, kid, you ain’t gonna--”

“HOLD IT--!”

Izuku thrusts out his arm. Todoroki throws out his left hand, the side Izuku attacked on, and for a moment, Izuku feels heat in his face; it isn’t intense, but it’s there. Flames, fire, he realizes. Todoroki’s left side.

Control, Izuku thinks desperately. Control it, control it, control it, my power can kill, my power can kill, control it--

Izuku summons his will, waits for the right moment, and swings his arm again--but this time, he swings it back towards himself.

The wind pressure is enough to blow back Todoroki’s own attack, and although Izuku’s arm burns and pulses with pain, it isn’t broken.

Great, he thinks, if just for a moment, so I can only control it if I’m actively trying not to kill someone. Perfect.

Todoroki is distracted. His entire team is. Izuku looks down at Uraraka, nods, and as soon as she nods back, he dissociates.

It’s a very quick, true moment; he drops out of his body and surges forward, concentrating all his energy on his hands. He phases right through Todoroki--another distraction, since he knows how odd it is to he phased through by a ghost--and reaches out for the headbands.

Which one? he thinks, mind moving frantically while the world around him slows to a near standstill. Which one is it? Which one? Which one?

“GRAB THEM ALL!”

“Crap, I wasn’t looking!”

“HE COULD’VE SWITCHED THEM UP, WHO KNOWS WHICH ONE IS THE RIGHT ONE--”

Izuku grabs two headbands--the one on the top and the one on the bottom. He yanks them, the velcro tearing and the headbands secure in his hand, and Todoroki lurches forward suddenly, eyes wide. Izuku feels a little bad for phasing through him like that, but the feeling is gone when he remembers Todoroki literally declared war on him not even half an hour ago.

He zooms back into his body. The headbands fall into his lap as his head snaps up, and he grabs them with his real, physical hands and settles them around his neck.

He doesn’t know which ones he grabbed until Midnight’s voice booms around them seconds later.

“TIME’S UP!” she shouts, and all the students and their cavalry teams stop dead in their tracks. “In first place comes Midoriya, Hatsume, Uraraka, and Tokoyami! Excellent job, kiddos!”

“WHOO!”

“You did it, man! Everyone, gimme an ‘M’!”

“‘M!’”

“Oh, not this again--”

Izuku lets out a huge rush of breath in relief. Well, if that hadn’t been lucky he doesn’t know what is. Midnight goes on, announcing the rest of the winners (Todoroki and Bakugou are amongst them), but Izuku puts it out of his mind for now, so giddy with relief he could cry.

“Deku!” Uraraka shrieks, dropping formation; Izuku almost hits the ground, but is caught by Tokoyami in time. “DekuDekuDekuDekuDeku, we did it, we did it, we really did it!”

“Hey, Ten Million, that was awesome!” Hatsume says, grinning, getting right up in his face. “What was that, huh? How’d you do that? I wanna know!”

Izuku  laughs shakily, rubbing the back of his neck. He does this a lot, he thinks. “W-Well, it’s a long story--” he starts; and then, out of the corner of his eye, he sees Todoroki already leaving the field, heading down one of the winding corridors of the arena.

Izuku watches him go; in his mind, he hears his own words, “You wanna fight, Thermostat? Then let’s fight,” and he feels guilty all over again.

I should probably apologize, he thinks, biting his lip.

“Ten Miiilllionnn~!” Hatsume’s hand waves in his face, and Izuku snaps his attention back to her. He hasn’t even had the chance to take a single step. “Tell me how you did that!”

“E-Erm, like I said, it’s a long story,” Izuku says. “There’s a better time for it, I’m sure, but right now isn’t--”

“There will be a bit of an intermission now while we set the stage for the one-on-one matches!” Midnight’s voice booms again, and Izuku and the others turn towards her. “Enjoy your break while you can, kiddies! After this, it’s gonna be non-stop!”

“Deku, maybe you should try and get some rest somewhere,” Uraraka says, and Izuku turns to her. She frowns at him; now that her giddiness and joy at their victory has faded somewhat, she seems worried. “You look really tired.”

“Really tired” feels like an understatement, but Izuku doesn’t say so. Rather, he nods. “You’re right,” he says. “I’ll find somewhere to take a power-nap. I do feel kind of dead on my feet right now.”

Tokoyami blinks. “Is that a ghost joke--”

“Later!” Izuku says, waving, and he turns and runs off, his bell jingling cheerfully as his feet slam the ground.

The first thing Izuku does is get Howler from Recovery Girl. Howler is ecstatic, perking up the moment Izuku enters the infirmary, and Izuku leaves with him, the dog’s leash wrapped around his wrist. He’s happy to have Howler back at his side again. He missed him.

He bumps into Toshinori on his way back to the waiting room.

“There you are!” Toshinori says, raising a hand in greeting. “You did good, Midoriya, I’m--” He stops suddenly, like he’s slammed into an invisible wall, and his eyes go wide. “...Kiddo.”

“Hmm?”

“What happened to you?”

Izuku smiles. He has no idea how it looks on his face, but Toshinori winces, so it can’t be good. “I wasn’t able to sleep last night,” he says. “I’m gonna go crash on the floor somewhere, don’t mind me.”

It’s hard to read the look on Toshinori’s face, but he looks mostly worried. “That isn’t good,” he says. “Are you sure you’re okay? The one-on-one matches are up next, it isn’t safe to fight when you’re exhausted--”

“That’s why I’m gonna go sleep until the matches,” Izuku answers simply. “I’ll be fine, alright? Maybe I can steal some of Aizawa-sensei’s coffee.”

Horror overcomes Toshinori’s face. “Do you want to die?”

“Yes. But don’t worry, I’ll let you take the fall for it.”

“Kid, no--”

“Okay, fine, I won’t steal his coffee,” Izuku says. “It was a joke, anyway. Not gonna lie, if Aizawa-sensei killed you over coffee...that would make me very…”

“...Don’t.”

“...Depresso.”

Toshinori puts his head in his hands. “That’s it, kid. You’re officially grounded.”

Izuku blinks. “...Is...Is that a coffee bean joke?”

“Maybe.”

“I have corrupted the number one hero. My life is complete.”

“In all seriousness, though,” Toshinori says, “go get some sleep. A fifteen minute rest goes a long way.”

Izuku nods. “Alright. Thanks!”

He leaves with Howler and a smile on his face.

Izuku wakes up to a tug in his chest.

He sits up off the floor, feeling less rested than before. Howler is still sitting there, waiting for him, which Izuku thinks is good; the dog stayed with his body (even though he was still in it) the entire time he was asleep. He’s learning, then.

“Ayy, welcome back to the land of the living, buddy.”

“I don’t feel like I’m back in the land of the living,” Izuku says, shaking his head. “How long was I asleep?”

“Ehh, maybe ten, fifteen minutes?”

“I counted twelve.”

“Wow, how bored can you get?”

“Shut up, Gerald.”

“YOU KNOW WHAT--!”

Something tugs at Izuku’s chest again, reminding him of what had awoken him in the first place, and he frowns, looking around for a moment.

“Yo, boyo, what up?”

“Something’s wrong,” Izuku says, confused. “There’ve been a few times where I’ve gotten this weird feeling in my chest, and usually it’s right before something bad happens.”

“Oh, you mean like premonition?” Nana guesses. “I’m pretty sure that’s a thing a lot of people suspect ghosts to have. It wouldn’t surprise me if you had a few more ghostly traits than you realized.”

Izuku nods, then blinks in confusion when there’s another blatant tug within him. Something is definitely wrong. He doesn’t feel dread like he did when they were attacked by the League at the USJ, but he definitely feels something.

And it isn’t good.

He’s about to get to his feet, but his physical body is still exhausted, and he’d really rather save it for the matches if he can. He looks at Howler; the dog looks back at him, obedient and patiently waiting.

Izuku trusts him and dissociates, leaving his body behind as he heads off to investigate.

He moves down corridors and hallways, unseen, searching, listening. He still feels off, even as a ghost, and something is definitely wrong, he just doesn’t know what it is yet. He doesn’t think U.A. is under attack again; the tug would be much stronger if that were the case.

But something is--

Yank.

There’s a jerk and a pull and a tug at his chest unlike before, and it actually has Izuku lurching forward. It isn’t dread, it isn’t fear, it isn’t a death omen; it’s something entirely new, an unfamiliar feeling, like something within him is being suffocated.

“Holy crap--”

“I can feel that, what the hell--”

“Kiddo--”

Something is definitely, definitely wrong, and it’s worse than Izuku originally thought it was.

He flies, moving as quickly as he can. He feels led by the tug in his chest, like it’s pulling him in the right direction; he knows where he has to go even though he doesn’t know where he’s going.

“--the  hell is wrong with you, I expected better of you, Shouto.”

Izuku turns the corner.

Endeavor and Todoroki are standing there across from each other in the corridor. The flames on Endeavor’s face send what would be, on any other occasion, a warm glow through the shadowy hall--but of course, right now, the glow is nothing short of terrifying.

For the first time since Izuku’s met him, Todoroki looks angry. No, he’s furious, fists balled and shaking at his sides, and Endeavor has nearly the same stance, though he’s better at hiding his anger.

“I have nothing to say to you,” Todoroki spits. “I didn’t need my fire in the matches--”

“But you wouldn’t have lost if you’d used it.”

“I’m not using your damn Quirk.”

There’s another lurch in Izuku’s chest that sends him forward. This is different. This is weird. This is bad. Todoroki’s actual life isn’t in danger but something else is, something else is in danger that isn’t Todoroki’s physical being.

It’s his spirit.

Endeavor narrows his eyes. His fists hadn’t been shaking before but they’re shaking now, and Izuku doesn’t know what to do. The feeling in his chest is suffocating now; he feels like he’s being choked.

“Okay, boyo, here’s what you do--sucker-punch Endeavor through a building.”

“As much as I hate to agree with such violence, I concur, sweetheart.”

“Endeavor, you get away from that kid, you piece of--”

Todoroki doesn’t back down. He stares his fath--no, Endeavor, he stares Endeavor down, and there’s so much malice and hatred (and pain) in his eyes that Izuku is taken back.

“I’m going to prove it to you,” Todoroki snarls. “I’ll prove to you today that I can win without using my left side.”

The tension spikes. Izuku’s chest is full of knots, and he feels like there are chains wrapped around his throat. He watches Endeavor, watches his irritated scowl turn into bone-deep fury, and his fists are still balled, and Todoroki is standing there in front of him, he’s close, he’s close enough, Endeavor could hurt him--

Izuku is this close to firing up One For All and bringing down his and the ex-holders’ shared fury, but he doesn’t get the chance to.

“Time’s just about up, kiddies! Please return to the arena, we will be starting the one-on-one matches in thirty minutes!” comes Midnight’s voice over the intercon, and Izuku, Endevor, and Todoroki all raise their heads.

“I have to go,” Todoroki says, and he spins on his heel and storms off down the hall, away from Izuku and Endeavor.

“Shouto.”

Todoroki stops. “What do you want.”

“I’m disappointed in you.”

There’s a beat. Todoroki doesn’t flinch.

“...Good. If you were proud of me, I’d know I’m doing something wrong.”

He keeps walking. Izuku watches him go, and eventually, Endeavor scowls and turns, storming off in the opposite direction.

He’s unknowingly walking straight towards Izuku.

Izuku hates being passed through. It doesn’t hurt, it just feels...weird. Plus, just the mentality of it is kinda weird to think about, too, the fact that someone is going straight through him--

But he also knows how uncomfortable it is to the person who passes through him, and he knows it affects them more than it affects him.

So, when Endeavor walks, Izuku walks to meet him.

He passes straight through Endeavor and Endeavor passes straight through him.

Endeavor stops like he’d been slammed into by a wall, and he looks around stupidly for a moment or two. The anger is mostly gone, replaced with confusion--and maybe a little bit of fear.

Then, he shakes it off, turns, and keeps walking.

There isn’t a lot Izuku can do right now; he has thirty minutes before the matches start up again, but time flies fast, and he still has to go retrieve his body.

But later. He’s never haunted anyone before, but he’d be damned if he didn’t let Endeavor be the first.

Izuku retrieves his body and drops Howler off with Recovery Girl in record time, and then he’s running back down the hall and towards the arena.

He turns a corner abruptly and promptly smashes into Todoroki.

Fitting, he thinks.

They both stumble backwards, but neither of them lose their balance. Izuku rubs his head for a moment, but he’s used to bruises, so it doesn’t faze him much.

“S-Sorry, that was my fault!” Izuku says immediately, waving his hands back and forth. “I-I wasn’t looking where I was going…”

Todoroki doesn’t really answer. He’s stoic again, the anger and malice gone, but now that Izuku looks closer, he sees pain in Todoroki’s eyes.

“I was looking for you,” Todoroki says simply, straightening up and lowering his hand back to his side. “Do you have a few minutes?”

“E-Erm, sure,” Izuku says, nodding. They’re alone here; no one else is around to hear the conversation. “What do you want to talk about…?”

“I’m sorry for my timing earlier,” Todoroki says without missing a beat. “I don’t withdraw my declaration, but my timing was poor. I’m sorry I didn’t read the situation better.”

“N-No, that’s okay,” Izuku says, shaking his head. He shifts his weight and rubs his forearm idly. “I’m sorry I got so angry earlier…”

He isn’t sure what Todoroki feels, but to Izuku, the awkwardness is intense.

“Also, there’s something else,” Todoroki says, and Izuku listens. “I’ve been wondering this for quite some time now, and I have to know…your Quirk. The mutation one.”

Izuku’s train of thought derails. Oh, no…

“It reminds me of All Might’s,” Todoroki states, and it’s a fact. “So, Midoriya...I have to ask…”

Izuku swallows hard. “Fire away.”

Todoroki blinks, and it’s only now that Izuku realized what it is he just said. Todoroki doesn’t comment, even though Izuku is mentally kicking himself in the butt.

“I was wondering,” Todoroki goes on, and Izuku waits and listens and holds his breath, “are you...All Might’s secret love child or something?”

Izuku blinks. “What.”

“You,” Todoroki says, like he hadn’t even asked such a question at all. “Are you All Might’s illegitimate kid.”

“PFFFFF--”

“HOLY CRAP I’M DYING, OH MY GOSH--”

“I’M ALREADY DEAD AND I’M STILL DYING--!”

“Wellp. Looks like this is your legacy now, Toshi. Nice.”

For a moment, Izuku stares.

And then it clicks.

“WAITWAITWAITWAITWAIT,” Izuku shrieks, waving his hands back and forth. “How can...how can you ask someone that with a straight face!?”

Todoroki does ask it with a straight face, though. And of course he does, because he’s, well...Todoroki.

“You’re dodging the question,” Todoroki says, more suspiciously this time. “Are you, or are you not?”

Zip.

And Izuku’s body hits the floor.

Todoroki doesn’t bat an eye. “I’ll take that as a yes, then.”

“ Crap no!” Izuku screeches, darting back into his body and leaping off the ground, ignoring new bruises. “I-It’s not like that, you just c-caught me off-guard! I-I mean, no, I’m not All Might’s--nononono, it’s not like that, I-I mean it’s not like I’d tell you if it was like that either so I don’t expect you to believe me but I swear it’s not like that at all!”

“Smooth. Freaking smoooooooth.”

“Way to go, kiddo.”

Todoroki frowns at him. “The way you worded that,” he says, and Izuku stops, calming down now that the subject has changed. “‘It’s not like that,’ you said. So you have a connection with All Might that you can’t talk about.”

Izuku chews on his lip for just a moment. “I-I--”

“I’m not here to pry answers out of you,” Todoroki cuts in, and Izuku snaps his teeth together to shut himself up. “If you can’t talk about it, or don’t want to talk about it, that’s your business, not mine.”

Izuku breathes a sigh of relief.

“However.”

The sigh of relief is cut short.

“You do have a connection with All Might,” Todoroki goes on. “And as such...I need to beat you. I have my convictions, have my reasons. If you have something from the man himself, then…”

Izuku bites his lip, not really knowing what to say. “I…”

And Todoroki tells him his story. His whole story, from start to finish, and Izuku listens, taking in every word and holding it, grasping it, feeling sick because of it. Todoroki tells him about his family, about his father, about the mother who’d poured boiling water over him, about the siblings he wasn’t allowed to interact with, about his family of abuse and fear and pain.

And Izuku listens, shell-shocked, not saying a word. He thinks back to what he’d seen in that hallway, thinks back to Endeavor’s balled fists and Todoroki’s anger and hatred and malice.

“So now you see why I need to beat you,” Todoroki concludes. “I’ll beat you, and I’ll prove to him that I can do it without using his fire.”

He leaves after that, and Izuku doesn’t stop him. He says nothing, turning over this new information in his head, half his stomach in his throat. For a moment--and he’s not quite sure why--he thinks of the scars on his spirit, scars he’d never been able to explain but were always there, showing up at random times for no apparent reason.

He wonders what Todoroki’s spirit looks like.

And Izuku makes a conscious decision in that hallway. As Todoroki walks away and Izuku watches him leave, he makes a conscious decision. A promise.

He’s going to save Todoroki Shouto.

Chapter Text

Toshinori is worried about Izuku.

The kid has seemed... off, for literally the whole day thus far. He did outstandingly in the preliminary rounds--he came first in both of them--but even so, Toshinori has an odd sinking feeling that something is wrong, that there’s something the boy isn’t telling him.

Toshinori bumps into him for the second time that day, as Izuku heads one way towards the waiting room and Toshinori heads the other, towards the teacher’s seats to watch.

“Midoriya,” Toshinori says, smiling softly. “Did you manage to get any sleep, or--”

He stops short, feet going still and eyes going wide.

Izuku is fuming.

The boy’s eyes are narrowed, balled fists swinging back and forth at his sides as he power-walks, and he has this look in his eyes that screams dangerdangerdanger in rapid session, like he’s on his way to gouge someone's eyes out. Toshinori can feel it, actually; he can physically feel the anger and malice rolling off his successor in waves.

The boy. Is seething.

“Midoriya,” Toshinori says, taken aback, “what’s wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong,” Izuku answers in a low, dark voice that belies his actual words. The bruise-like circles beneath his eyes do nothing to ease Toshinori’s rising concern. “I have to go get ready for my match, but--Endeavor. You know Endeavor, don’t you?” It’s more a statement than a question.

Toshinori frowns, confused, but he nods anyway. “Yeah, I know him,” he says, “he’s the number two hero. He doesn’t particularly like me, but I harbor no hard feelings--”

“Don’t trust him.” The words are hissed, sharp, dangerous, unlike anything Toshinori’s heard from the boy before.

Toshinori blinks. “What?”

“Don’t trust him,” Izuku repeats, looking him in the eye. “I don’t care what you think about him, you can’t trust him.”

Toshinori studies the boy’s face for a moment or two. He has seen Izuku frustrated, has seen Izuku upset, has seen Izuku scared and happy and sad and hurt...

But this...this is new. It’s the first time Toshinori has seen the kid so blatantly furious.

“I can’t explain it right now,” Izuku says, and Toshinori is brought back to the present by the malice in his voice, “but don’t trust Endeavor. No matter what happens, do not trust him.”

The boy’s behavior right now is sending off millions of red flags in his head, and Toshinori has no reason not to believe him, because this is odd behavior for Izuku. Toshinori knows this boy, knows that he can look past people’s flaws and see them for who they truly are inside, knows that he likes to see the best in people.

And he isn’t doing that now.

“Alright, my boy,” Toshinori says, “alright. I’ll keep an eye out for him, okay?”

Izuku nods stiffly. His stance doesn’t change. “Thank you,” he says, and he keeps walking, storming down the hall at a brisk, “don’t-you-dare-stop-me” kind of pace. Toshinori watches him go, not quite knowing what just happened.

But he takes it seriously either way. It’s hard not to, what with the murderous look in Izuku’s eyes and the red-hot fury of his voice.

Izuku heads back to the stands; his classmates are there, seated to watch the one-on-one matches until it’s their turn.

“Hey, Midoriya, you're back!” Kirishima grins and rushes up to meet him, waving a hand to get his attention. “Just in time, too, your match is first—” Kirishima screeches to a halt, and his eyes go wide. “Dude, what happened.”

“I’m fine,” Izuku says, smiling. “Also, I’m lowkey gonna strangle someone.”

Kirishima eeps and leaps backwards, nearly tripping over one of the seats in the stand. “DUDE, WHAT HAPPENED.”

“There isn't much time to explain,” Izuku says, brushing it off for now. “My match is first, isn’t it? The one-on-one matches?”

“Well, yeah,” says Kirishima—and then, he stops. “Oh, hold on a minute...Ojirou was looking for you a second ago. Said there was something important he needed to tell you.”

Izuku frowns. He pushes aside his anger at Endeavor for the time being; unless he approaches these fights with a clear mind, he's going to end up losing. Horribly.

“Midoriya! There you are!”

Izuku and Kirishima turn; Ojirou sprints towards them, looking frantic.

“Hey!” says Kirishima, waving a hand again. “I was just telling Midoriya here you were looking for him…”

“What's up?” Izuku asks, curious.

“I've gotta talk to you about the guy you’re fighting,” Ojirou pants. “I hate to say it, but you're gonna have to drop your quips and jabs for this match.”

Izuku hears the information, but his brain refuses to compute. “I have to do what, you say?”

Some kind of brainwashing Quirk, apparently. Izuku’s opponent has some kind of brainwashing Quirk that he can only activate on people who verbally respond to him.

The answer is simple: Izuku just has to keep his mouth shut throughout the match. It sounds simple in his head, of course, but he knows carrying it out is going to be a totally different thing altogether.

“Hey, we could always remind you not to talk, y’know, if you think that would help.”

“No, that wouldn’t be fair,” Izuku says, shaking his head. “I appreciate the offer, but, I mean...I want to win this on my own. If I get outside help, I mean, I just...I wouldn't be able to accept the victory.”

“Meh, suit yourself. And technically, we're more 'inside' help than 'outside' help, but whatever.”

“You don't need us, man, you'll be great either way. Just remember not to respond to Shinsou and you'll be good to go!”

Izuku nods, but he already knows it's easier said than done. Quips and puns and just talking in general are a huge help when he's fighting or nervous; he isn't sure how he'll be able to handle it if that's taken away from him.

“You'll be great, just do your best. You don't need us anyway, you'll be fine on your own.”

“Thanks, Nana,” Izuku says—and then, he leaves the waiting room and heads for the arena.

The time has come.

“And now, the moment you've all been waiting for!” Present Mic's voice booms; he's taken over for Midnight during the one-on-one matches, considering he had a better commentator's voice. “The first bracket of the Sports Festival kicks off with two polar opposite competitors! Someone who stands in the background, and no one quite knows how he got here, it's Shinsou Hitoshi from General Studies!”

The crowds clap and whoop and cheer as Shinsou steps onto the arena.

“Versus—! He came first in the entrance exam and has led all the way since! Give it up for Midoriya Izuku, from the Hero Course!”

Izuku steps up onto the arena, standing at the far end across from Shinsou. Shinsou stares him down, looking every bit as furious as Izuku currently feels.

Present Mic starts the countdown, and Shinsou opens his mouth to speak--or, rather, to lay down his first attack.

“Hold on just a sec,” Izuku says, putting up a finger, and Shinsou stops, looking confused. When Shinsou glares at him, Izuku grins. “Let me have the first word here, why don’tcha?”

He figures, if he can’t answer Shinsou without getting brainwashed…

...He’ll get all the jitters out now with this opening speech. After that’s done, well, he’ll be able to fight without nearly as many knots in his chest.

Shinsou opens his mouth again; Izuku plunges forward.

“Y’know, we’re kinda in the same boat here, if you think about it,” Izuku says, stepping forward. “I can’t use my power without breaking myself--” Or, he corrects, at least the power the rest of the world knows me by, “--and you can’t use your power unless I talk back to you.”

Shinsou’s eyes narrow. “So he told you,” he growls. “That stupid monkey must have told you. There’s no other way you’d know.”

Oh.

Oh.

Izuku snaps his teeth together, but he wants so badly to say something. It almost physically pains him to hold back and keep his lips sealed.

Now it’s Shinsou’s turn to smile. “You know, I’m kind of jealous of you,” he says, stepping forward. There’s still a lot of space between them, but it’s smaller now than it was at the start of the fight. “You’ve got that really flashy Quirk, don’t you? Consider me envious.”

Envious of my Quirk, huh? Izuku thinks, glaring. Boy, you have no idea…

“It must be nice,” Shinsou barks, “to be born with the ideal Quirk. With a Quirk the rest of the world can’t hold against you!”

Oh.

Oh.

Oh, no--

Izuku charges.

“Hey, Kacchan, look! I got my Quirk!”

Kacchan frowns at him. “Are you serious?” he asks. “C’mon, there’s no way you got a Quirk. You’re Deku, remember?”

“Nonono, I did!” Izuku insists, bouncing up and down. “Mom took me to the doctor yesterday and when we came home I had it! Watch, Kacchan! Watchwatchwatchwatch--!”

“Okay, okay, fine, I’ll watch!” Kacchan snaps immediately. “I’ll watch, just--ACK!”

Izuku’s body hits the ground and his ghost hovers over it. Kacchan shrieks and springs backwards, eyes wide and full of horror.

“What the heck is that!?” Kacchan yells, pointing. “Deku, what did you do!?”

“It’s my Quirk!” Izuku says, beaming even though Kacchan can’t see him. “Did you see it, Kacchan? Isn’t it cool?”

“Cool!?” Kacchan repeats, eyes still wide. “No, it’s not! It’s not cool at all!”

Izuku blinks. “...What?”

Izuku throws a punch at Shinsou’s face.

Shinsou jumps to the side, barely avoiding Izuku’s fist, but he’s grinning now. He’d meant to bring out Izuku’s anger and he succeeded, and Izuku knows this, he knows this, but he’s so angry and so much has happened today, and now he’s remembering things, things he’d rather forget--

Izuku pulls back his middle finger with his thumb and flicks off a blast with One For All without thinking.

The wind pressure blasts Shinsou off his feet, but it blasts Izuku backwards, too, nearly throwing him out of bounds. His shoes scrape the cement as he’s blown back, and he just, just manages to stay in the arena.

Izuku grits his teeth, pain spiking through his broken fingers. That was stupid, he thinks, reeling. That was really, really stupid--

Shinsou is better off than he is, farther away from the white line, and he grins and straightens up.

“That’s right,” Shinsou says, approaching steadily, “someone like you wouldn’t know, would you? You have the perfect Quirk, of course you’d have no idea what it’s like to grow up and spend your whole life being called ‘scary’ or ‘freaky.’”

Stop it, Izuku thinks, ducking his head. Stop it, stop it, stop it…

“You have no idea what it’s like, do you!?”

Stopitstopitstopit--!

“You have no idea what it’s like to be called a monster!”

Izuku freezes.

“You can drop dead! That’s not normal, that’s scary!”

“I-It’s n-not technically dropping dead,” Izuku tries explaining, but it doesn’t work, he knows it doesn’t. “I-I just, I mean, I just leave my body for a little while, but I can go back--!”

“It’s scary!” the little girl shrieks, pointing at him. Around her stand the rest of Izuku’s kindergarten classmates, all with the same look in their eyes. “It’s like you’re dead! That can’t be real!”

“I-I mean, i-it’s just--”

“Monster!” one of them shouts suddenly, pointing accusingly. “You have to be a monster! That’s the only reason for it, you’re a monster!”

Izuku feels like he’s been stabbed. “T-T-That’s...I-I’m not--”