Work Text:
RULE ONE: A SHINOBI MUST ALWAYS SHOW ALLEGIANCE TO THEIR HOKAGE ABOVE ALL ELSE
--
"You know," the Rokudaime sighed, resoutly not slumping in his seat, "I am your Hokage. Me. When I tell you to do something, you do it. That's how this works."
"With all due respect, Rokudaime-sama," Choji started, as he was the only one on his team that was at least pretending to consider what he said, "Naruto said he wants us to be here for his and Sasuke's Chunin exams. Surely, you understand the importance of supporting your comrades?" He posited, and Kakashi almost sighed. That was one of the kinder ways he'd been told to fuck off by his subordinates recently.
His Cute Little Gennin were his biggest obstacle as Hokage, these days. 12 of the best shinobi at his disposal, and not a single one of them respected him above the sunshine-haired teen that was slotted to take his place. And, despairingly, the number grew by the day. Anko's allegiance was bought with Orochimaru's head on a plate (gathered during an unauthorized detour on a mission) and copious amounts of Dango. Kurenai had been persuaded by her team. Even Gai and Tenzo were more a neutral party then anything else.
Really, it hadn't been so bad at first. In the beginning, they all seemed content to wait him out; everyone knew Naruto was next in line for the hat. Kakashi was a glorified seat warmer, really, so, they were content to listen to him. Sure, sometimes it was blatantly obvious that they were humoring him. Sure, sometimes they took unauthorized detours to do a favour for Naruto. Sure, they would sometimes 'forget' to address him as hokage. But they listened to him, and always finished their missions, and the detours were simply never recorded anywhere and unceremoniously forgotten. Besides, he didn't really care for a formal address.
But he'd been here for almost five years now, and Naruto's age-mates were getting antsy. The only reason they respected him as long as they did was because Naruto adored him, and apparently even that can only justify so much. He was a pretty decent Hokage, really, but everyone knew that Naruto would be better. The blonde had plans written out that were looked over and refined by his co-conspirators, and everyone expected Kakashi to turn the hat over as soon as Naruto turned 21.
Of course, he didn't. Being hokage was a lot of work- more then he thought Naruto could happily handle. Kakashi had no doubt that he'd manage, almost definitely better then Kakashi even, but he didn't want to shove so much responsibility onto his cute little Gennin's shoulders. Most powerful Ninja since the founding or not, he deserved some time to be (relatively) normal.
Apparently, there was only one ninja in the village that agreed with him full heartedly; Naruto's old teacher, Iruka. Everyone else either listened to him out of duty to the village or fear of him because, regardless of appearances, he's been kage-level for at least a decade.
With the exception of Naruto's peers. The 11 of them had grown tired of his leadership, and were blatantly taking orders from a Naruto who's been pissed off that he didn't get the hat as a birthday present for almost an entire year. Thankfully, they still kept up the illusion of obedience; they only ever spoke out against him in private. And, by private, he didn't just mean private audiences in the Hokage tower; he meant his traitorous students (Almost definitely Sakura) revealed where he lived, and the young adults took it as their personal (or assigned by Naruto, he couldn't tell) mission to break into his apartment and complain to/prank him constantly.
Apparently, Naruto couldn't settle for just being hokage. Of course not. He had to be the youngest Hokage to date, which means he had to be Hokage before he turned 24. All he had to do whine about that loudly a few times, and his peers turned on the Rokudaime like feral little racoons.
He still clearly recalled when it really sunk in that he was fighting a losing battle. He was berating Assassination Squad 8 for using excessive and revealing force when sent to discreetly dispose of the few remaining Danzo Loyalists that had been attempting to re-trigger the ROOT brainwashing of recovering ROOT members. It was a gory demise, which Kakashi was fine with because the fuckers deserved it, but which did not fit the set parameters of 'discreetly'. Most of the targets still had a lot of pull on both he civilian and shinobi council, and it would be a headache dealing with the fallout of 'public executions' instead of 'accidents'.
Hinata, sweet, conniving, Hinata, promised to be as discreet as they could be.
Kakashi, ignorant, dumb, Kakashi, did not feel the need to clarify how discreet that was. Hinata's demeanor was so obedient, it wasn't his fault her entire upbringing slipped his mind. It wasn't his fault that he forgot she spent a significant chunk of her life life lying to please people above her while immediately turning and disobeying them for the good of others.
So now there they were, Kiba trying his damndest to convince Kakashi that they, in fact, showed an abundance of restraint. Beheadings were standard, after all, so Kiba apparently didn't see the fuss in, say, beheading people by having Shino's insects burl into their neck and slowly work the head off of the body. Kakashi sighed that it was against regulation, and beheadings were out of question for Discreet operations anyway, and they knew this because they were his top assassination squad.
Kiba shrugged, smirk only a twitch away from being a blatant challenge. Hinata was smiling serenely, staring directly into Kakashi's eyes with complete innocence and confusion. Shino was standing so still and quiet that Kakashi half believed he had replaced himself with a statue or a plant or something. None of them seemed even a little apologetic.
"Back in my day," Kakashi drawled, and he sounded like an old man, "Shinobi were real sticklers for the rules. I, myself, was a poster child for exemplary rule abiding." He bemoaned. He waited for one of the young adults in front of him to speak, only to be surprised when a voice chimed in from the shadows instead.
"In all fairness, Rokudaime-san, back in your day Konoha was fighting it's second world war that decade. Perhaps it's ideals were fundamentally flawed, and it is a good thing that they are now being changed." The shadow, the ANBU guard that was legally not allowed to speak unless spoken to on duty, deadpanned. He didn't even bother to mask his voice. Kakashi couldn't bite back a groan as Kiba broke into laughter.
Sure, he was young, but Sai had been ANBU for most of his life, in ROOT, directly under Danzo. He knew how to hold his damn tongue better than anyone else in Naruto's accumulated 'Friend Group'. (though really, at this point, it was more of a Cult.)
But, Sai was Team Seven. Which meant that this specific interruption? The blatant disrespect and disregard for his Hokage?
This was a declaration of war, straight from Naruto himself.
Kakashi swore, on his father's grave, he heard Hinata whisper 'let the games begin'. Her smile was saccharine sweet, and it gave Kakashi chills.
Squad 8 was dismissed. Kakashi feared this would get worse before it got better.
He hated being right, sometimes.
There was the small things, like the little bastards called Naruto 'Hokage-sama' more often then they called Kakashi 'Hokage' at all. It ticked the council of elders off, so he really didn't care.
No, where he took issue was in situations like here, in the present day, where his best catch-and-retrieve team refuses to go after a Suna missing-nin that had escaped capture. According to the Nara heir, there was no point in pursuing; they were about to hand her over to Suna anyway, there's no point going after her when the Kazekage could get the woman himself. The Yamanaka heir chimed in that she was sure that whatever Kunoichi they sent after the woman would have fun catching her.
Honestly, Kakashi agreed, but he couldn't say that. because the only reason he agreed was because he knew a few things. He knew that there was a Naruto-made seal planted on the woman for a worst case scenario of her escape. He knew that Naruto had direct and frequent conversations with the Kazekage with absolutely no supervision from either village, which meant he knew that this particular missing nin was on very poor terms with the Kazekage and absolutely not a Suna-spy, because he trusted Naruto's judgement. He could assume that the Kazekage's sister was the one sent in pursuit due to some grudge he didn't care about. He even had his suspicions that the Yamanaka heir herself had released the girl, to give her suna-princess girlfriend something to do. Kakashi was well aware that this was a contained issue that had no chance of failing, if for no other reason then the Uzumaki seal of a contingency. If, somehow, the woman wasn't dead within the week or said anything that could endanger Konoha, her brain would melt through her nose.
Kakashi knew that but, officially, The Rokudaime didn't. Officially, if his jonnin were slapping unregulated seals onto prisoners, he'd have to address it. Officially, if he knew that Naruto talked to the Kazekage, he'd have to have regulate everything that was said. Officially, he shouldn't trust any ninja from any other village to do a job right. Officially, he'd have to execute team 10 for releasing a prisoner.
So, officially, he knew none of that. He just knew that a Missing-nin from Suna infiltrated and then been captured by Konoha, and had now escaped and was long gone. He needed to put his best catch and retrieval team on it, or the Elder Council would complain about showing weakness to Suna.
But team 10 had to attend the Chunin exams for Naruto and Sasuke, because their hokage-to-be asked nicely, which apparently mattered more then direct orders from their current hokage. Kakashi was so tired. Were he any less of a Shinobi, he would have given up by now and let Naruto take the hat. At this point, it was less a matter of him caring for Naruto's proper development and more a matter of Pride.
"As your Hokage, I can make you do whatever mission I demand." He insisted, trying his best to sound serious. In all honesty, while it's true, he isn't sure it's worth the wrath of his own team if he did something against the Holy Naruto Agenda. From the lightly amused expressions of team 10, they were thinking along the same lines.
Really, kids these days. They were the reason that his only ANBU guards were Tenzo (who refuses to be anywhere else), Genma (Who finds the entire thing hilarious), and Sai and Tenten (who were in on it and just as bad if not worse then their peers). If there was literally anyone else to bear witness to this insubordination, he'd have some real problems. Not problems he couldn't take care of (read; bully the young adults responsible into taking care of), but problems he'd rather avoid.
"Of course, Rokudaime-sama." Choji once again spoke up, and he sounded like he was placating a child. He was getting too old for this.
"Good. Then, as your Hokage, I order you to pick up three D-ranks each on your way out and be ready to depart on this A-rank mission in no more then ten days." He glowered, well aware that it would be a nullified mission within the week. They had enough grace not to comment on it as they saluted and Shun-shinned down to mission pick up. When they were finally gone, Kakashi gave into his instinct to slouch.
He was getting too old for this.
--