Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"-I'm tellin' ya, Sthu-ball. Cannoli's are just dessert strombolis."

Steven wiped some whipped cream off his nose, licking it from his thumb with an eager grin. "Agree to disagree, dad."

"Want the last one?"

He gladly took the pastry, breaking it in two. "Halfsies?" Steven offered, and Greg didn't argue. The Beach City sun was warm on the hybrid's face as he swung his legs off the edge of the porch, relishing in the organic comforts he'd deprived himself of for Homeworld's sake.

Greg looked at his cannoli, then sighed and set it aside. "Steven, I've been meaning to talk to you about something."

A rush of panic hit Steven's veins. It felt a bit like plunging into ice water. It's stupid- of the adults in his life, his dad has never hurt him- but talk usually meant secrets and secrets meant more to worry about. More to fight. More to fix. He set his own down, no longer hungry.

"Okay," he said, and gave him a winning smile to show just how okay it was(n't). "What's up?"

"It's just..." Greg suddenly reconsidered his cannoli, shoving it into his maw so he didn't have to speak. Steven's heart constricted. It was bad enough when adults asked to talk- when they did something else to think over the words first, that meant it was gonna hurt. A lot. Ideas formed and fell apart in his mind as he tried to brace himself for it.

Finally, after much chewing, he went on. "You know I'll always love Rose, right?"

Steven stared at him, thoroughly thrown for a loop. "Yes?"

"And you. I love you, buddy."

"I know, dad. You're my dad."

"Sure am," he agreed, running his hand over his bald head. "It's just... well, I have this lady friend, and-"

"You got a date?" Steven clutched his chest. "Stars, dad, you made me think it was the end of the world! Again!"

"Sorry, sorry! I just... wanted to make sure it was okay with you."

He bit his lip. There were a lot of responses banging about in his skull- chief of which being I'm not a Diamond, no one should take orders from me, ever, about anything- but it took a second to shuffle the appropriate one to the front. "Dad, I'm not a little kid. Heck, even if I was- if you've met someone you wanna be with, you should go for it." Steven tapped his fingernails on the railing. "Do I... know this lady friend?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah, sure. You know Barb."

Steven's brain did the equivalent of dial-up noises. "Ms. Miller?"

"Mm," said Greg, setting his chin on his hand. "She knows a thing or two about- well, about losing someone special. And raising someone special after that." He huffed out an awkward laugh. "And, I mean, she's really pretty."

"Does Sadie know about this?"

"I dunno. I assume so."

Steven breathed out his nose and leaned on Greg's side complacently. "I'm happy for you, dad."

Greg's arm encircled his shoulders and squeezed. "Thanks, Steven."

Group Chat: Teen Alert

Starboy: sadiekiller are u going to tell everyone or am I

Pizzasux: oh god
Pizzasux: steven what does that even mean

Starboy: it means i'm too akmdolsokdcls for proper grammar

glowstix: big mood

sadiekiller: I mean you can if you want
sadiekiller: i'm still processing it

Starboy: ye that's fair
Starboy: so it turns out my dad and Sadie's mom are
Starboy: like
Starboy: a thing now?

Connie: steven is midnight go to bed
Connie: wait nevermind I just caught up
Connie: steven what the fuck

glowstix: Big MoodTM
glowstix: ok but srsly are u ok
glowstix: adjusting to step-shennegians can be tough

sadiekiller: I have no idea tbh
sadiekiller: steven?

Starboy: if he's happy I'm happy

sadiekiller: that's literally not an answer

Starboy: ur mom is nice
Starboy: and I want my dad to be happy
Starboy: and I'm not gonna make it more complicated than that

Connie: want me to call
Connie: I'm staying up late to study

Starboy: yes pls
Starboy: g'night everyone else I love you

Chapter Text

HereComesAThot: so
HereComesAThot: does this make lars our bro-in-law

Cap'n: oh god
Cap'n: you're back
Cap'n: whos attacking

HereComesAThot: I don't need a fight to exist
HereComesAThot: I can just do that
HereComesAThot: I even like doing the thing

TheBitsTheBits: can't relate

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: hey Stevonnie wassup

HereComesAThot: m'lady kiki -tips hat-
HereComesAThot: anyway lars answer the question

TheBitsTheBits: would that makes lars the only straight person in your family

HereComesAThot: OMS YOU'RE RIGHT
HereComesAThot: my cister from another mister
HereComesAThot: my cishetti from another family

Cap'n: I'M NOT MARRIED TO SADIE OKAY
Cap'n: and assume a lot of me, you do

Pizzasux: *yet

sadiekiller: guys I logged on hoping for some epic memeage and instead I'm getting called out
sadiekiller: like legitimately pls don't do this

HereComesAThot: srry Sadie i'll stop

sadiekiller: thx

"Where is this gonna be, again?"

"Empire City," Sadie marveled, clutching the microphone to her chest out of habit.

Jenny snorted. "S'just some little hipster joint."

"Been a while since I've been out there," Greg said, hefting a speaker into the back of his van. "Ya'll sure you want me going? I'm gonna stink up your edgy vibe with dad jokes and outdated anecdotes."

"Honestly?" Kiki replied. "Of the adults we know, you're probably the most relaxed, Mr. Universe. So you're, like, the best option for vibe stinking."

"Says the girl who ain't even playin'."

"Hey, you begged me to be your fangirl for the evening."

"Temp roadie, coming through!" wheezed Stevonnie, who rounded the van with enough luggage to crush the entire band under its weight and still have extra. "Jeez, Sadie. Your mom is almost as bad as Mrs. Momheswaran."

"Stevonnie!" cheered Kiki, who immediately clung to their arm with a smile. "How you doing, my queerest of the platonic relations?"

Stevonnie giggled, pressing their forehead to hers. "Absolutely lovely, m'lady."

"You dweebs always act like it's been months since you've seen each other," Jenny groaned.

Kiki stuck her tongue out. "It has been months, thank you very much."

"Have you been... you all day?" Sadie asked, eyes wide. "I mean, you were you last night in the chat, so I figured-"

"Sleepover," they said with a shrug. "I've never been to one of your shows before. I'm so excited!"

"Is it... okay? For you to do that?"

Stevonnie's jaw ticked. They set the luggage down. "Sadie, if you don't want me around, I get it. I went a little overboard last night. But you gotta tell it to me straight."

"No, not at all! I just... I dunno." Her fingers ran through her hair. "I've never questioned this sort of stuff before. Maybe I should? It's basically part of everyday life here anyway, and now with Mr. Universe and my mom-"

"Sadie," said Stevonnie, gently intertwining fingers with the girl. "Trust me. If every part of me has their way, you'll never have to see a thing."

Jenny clapped her hands together. "Unhealthy coping mechanisms for the win!"

"Kiddo," Greg sighed, rubbing his bald head. "Wait. No. Kiddos. You're both kiddos now. I've adopted both of you. I know this is a bit weird, but I'm not asking you to be anything you're not, okay? You don't gotta be protectors or snoopers or whatever. You can just be Stevonnie and Sadie."

Sadie managed an awkward laugh. "Thanks, uh, Mr. Universe. You're pretty alright."

Buck came from the interior or the storage unit with an old guitar strapped across his shoulders. "Guys. Guys. I think I missed something here."

"I mean, you wouldn't if you weren't too mainstream for the chat," Jenny replied. "Mr. Universe and Ms. Miller are a thing now."

"Oh," said Buck, who slowly nodded. "Yeah, that sounds about right. Congrats, Mr. Universe."

Chapter Text

FollowMyBlog: steven you back

Starboy: for now
Starboy: connie has school stuff

FollowMyBlog: I've been meaning to ask this for a while now
FollowMyBlog: can I get a QnA for my blog

Starboy: i mean?????
Starboy: you can ask me whatever you wanna ask ronaldo
Starboy: you know that

FollowMyBlog: ye but every time I try to do an interview you do that Steven ThingTM and are way to personable and friendly

Starboy: Ronaldo... that's just my face.

TheBitsTheBits: akmsodldocksodlcoskdocsl
TheBitsTheBits: steven ur so valid

FollowMyBlog: Sneople- yes or no?

Starboy: yes or no to what exactly
Starboy: yes to the designs you drew bc they were cool
Starboy: no to ever seeing one myself

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: only steven would answer that seriously

FollowMyBlog: other aliens?

Starboy: yup

FollowMyBlog: they exist??? do they have wants????? wishes??????? galactic strategies for conquest???????????

Starboy: yup

FollowMyBlog: WHEN WILL THEY INVADE
FollowMyBlog: THE PEOPLE WANT ANSWERS STEVEN

Starboy: bold of you to assume they havent already

FollowMyBlog: I MEAN OTHER ALIENS AND YOU KNOW IT

Pizzasux: Ronnie you're missing out on a golden chance here
Pizzasux: steven y or n did you ever kill a man

Starboy: absolutely not

Connie: that's my job
Connie: I can't emoji rn bc i'm texting under my desk but insert lots of sharp stabby things here

glowstix: dood ur easily the most chill person I know
glowstix: but ur also the most metal person I know
glowstix: how do you find that middle ground

Connie: trauma and therapy
Connie: well more meditation than therapy
Connie: actually no therapy
Connie: I am fresh out of the therapy

Starboy: can confirm trauma is a great way to make a polite kid
Starboy: you ever write/say smth and immediately regret it
Starboy: can we please not discuss that

Cap'n: that's a very concerning thing you just said
Cap'n: but this is also a very public server so like
Cap'n: ignore mode engaged

Starboy: thx

sadiekiller: this might just be another bombzone but can we ask about fusion stuff

Starboy: only if you tell me why you're so hung up on it
Starboy: I promise it's only twice as cool as it looks

sadiekiller: well
sadiekiller: the way I see it
sadiekiller: everyone in your family fuses
sadiekiller: and you've fused with Mr. Universe
sadiekiller: so I just wanna know to expect
sadiekiller: if, yknow
sadiekiller: my mom and ur dad did the glowy thing

Starboy: ooooh gotcha
Starboy: well they CAN'T so jot that down
Starboy: fusion is how gems show intimacy. humans have their own ways.

Cap'n: -coughsexcough-

Connie: ew

Starboy: yes but no
Starboy: it can be more than that
Starboy: or less
Starboy: Stevonnie isn't smth as bland as sex
Starboy: because, ew
Starboy: but a fusion CAN encompass a sexual relationship
Starboy: any kind of relationship, good or bad

sadiekiller: but Stevonnie is like their own person, right???? how does that work?

Connie: they are their own person
Connie: a fusion is made out of a relationhip
Connie: but it's not made UP of that relationship

Pizzasux: akmdlcldockdocs Ya'll're so matter of fact
Pizzasux: I feel like i'm getting the alien The TalkTM

Connie: basically

Starboy: what's The TalkTM
Starboy: is it when they sit you down and tell you dark family secrets
Starboy: bc whooo boy I wish i'd had one of those

Pizzasux: the sex talk steven

Starboy: that literally could mean anything tho
Starboy: what about it?

glowstix: it's when ur parents man up and tell you abt sex
glowstix: usually around high school

Connie: that late?
Connie: my mom told me about it when I was like eight

Starboy: wait
Starboy: wait
Starboy: wait a second
Starboy: they don't tell you how babies happen??????????

TheBitsTheBits: no?

Pizzasux: WHY IS THIS SHOCKING
Pizzasux: STEVEN UR PARENTS ARE ALIENS

Starboy: but I still knew about it?????
Starboy: pearl gave me the basics when I was little
Starboy: didn't want me 'splashing organic fluids' around the house

Connie: that is the most Pearl thing I've ever read

sadiekiller: POINT BEING there's no bad side effects or anything?

Starboy: other than creating a whole new person no
Starboy: tho, again, my dad cannot fuse on his own
Starboy: and as much as I love my dad and ur mom I am NOT gonna be a middle ground for that

Connie: does permifusion count as a side effect?
Connie: bc as much as I love being Connie
Connie: I love being part of Stevonnie too
Connie: and if Stevonnie wants to chill for days at a time
Connie: I mean i'm hype

Starboy: OH RIGHT THAT TOO
Starboy: my brain took 'bad' and ran with it
Starboy: fusion is like this endless conversation
Starboy: and sometimes you never wanna finish that talk yknow?
Starboy: garnets been garnet longer than most of the planet's been around
Starboy: and Stevonnie just pops up whenever they want, and they stick around a while
Starboy: but sometimes its like the opposite?
Starboy: pearl and amethyst love each other but they nope out of opal pretty quick

FollowMyBlog: since we're already airing our dirty laundry
FollowMyBlog: do any of the gems have That Kind of relationship
FollowMyBlog: sexual
FollowMyBlog: I meant sexual

Pizzasux: RONALDO GROSS

FollowMyBlog: THE PPL WANNA KNOW

glowstix: dood you couldn't pay me enough to ask my mom about her hitting tier 15 or whatever with yellowdad

Starboy: that was rlly gross
Starboy: and I won't get into it
Starboy: but the answer is yes

Cap'n: wait rlly

Starboy: guys they're aliens who've been stuck on a planet together with just themselves
Starboy: for THOUSANDS of years
Starboy: you rlly think they haven't boinked at some point
Starboy: but fusion is about more than physical taste and I feel like ur not getting that
Starboy: I fuse with my moms bc I love them and theyre my moms
Starboy: I fuse with connie bc I love her and shes connie

Connie: steven are you ok
Connie: when you drop a lot of the punctuation it's not A Good Time

Starboy: ye I'm fine
Starboy: just frustrated I guess

FollowMyBlog: sorry steven
FollowMyBlog: I honestly didn't wanna make you uncomfortable
FollowMyBlog: I went overboard

Starboy: thanks
Starboy: this is gonna sound dumb but
Starboy: the gems always made fusion seem so MagicalTM when I was a kid
Starboy: they'd go on and on about the potential and how they 'only did it for emergencies'
Starboy: and now I'm older and we do it so naturally
Starboy: I guess i'm just defensive of it reverting back to how it was

TheBitsTheBits: steven that's totally valid
TheBitsTheBits: I haven't been through half of what u have and I would hate to see the shop go downhill

Starboy: my issues are just
Starboy: OUT AND PROMINENET TODAY
Starboy: and I don't know why
Starboy: sorry

Connie: when was the last time you ate smth steven

Starboy:...
Starboy: SHIT

Pizzasux: WE DID IT LADS
Pizzasux: WE GOT HIM TO SWEAR

Chapter Text

Donuts! At the Big Donut!
They make the world go 'round!

Sadie shifted a little, awake but already slipping back to sleep, and buried her head in a scrawny pink chest.

"Dude," Lars moaned. "Kill it with fire."

She let out an agreeing grunt and flapped a hand on the table beside them, finding her phone. She jabbed her fingers around until it stopped. Sadie set it by the pillow and tucked her hand back under the covers.

Donuts! At the Big-

"Sadie, I'm literally going to throw that thing out the window."

"You throw my phone and I throw you."

"Aww, but who would you cuddle then?"

"Lars, you're a twig. You are far from the comfiest thing I could snuggle."

Push below the diaphragm!
Get them happy and breathing, as fast as you can!

"Uuuuugggghhh." Sadie rolled onto her back and hit answer. "It's like one in the morning."

"Four, actually," Steven replied, his voice muffled. "Sorry to bother you this early, Sadie."

"Is someone dying? Because that's the only reason this call is okay."

"Not quite. See, I just got back into town from a mission, and Connie took Lion, and my feet are tired, so I was wondering if maybe I could crash at your place?"

"Oh. Um." She wiped her hand across her face, snagging some eye crusties along the way. "How to put this delicately..."

Lars put his head in the crook of Sadie's shoulder. "We're having a sleepover, dude."

"Oh," said Steven, sounding a mite bit embarrassed. "I can take the couch?"

"Can't you call your dad, Steven?"

"He's, uh, he's a little preoccupied." He paused. "You know?"

Sadie knew. And, judging by the way pink eyes flickered towards her, Lars knew too. "Ugh, fine," he grumbled. "Just don't wake my parents up, alright?"

"Can do. See you guys soon."

With that, he hung up the phone. Sadie stared at the time almost uncomprehendingly. "We should probably get dressed now, huh?"

sadiekiller: question how often does one water a hybrid
sadiekiller: how much food does he need
sadiekiller: double or half
sadiekiller: did everyone here die or

Connie: it's four in the morning

Cap'n: I mean ur awake

Connie: I just got home from a mission
Connie: and I was thiiiis close to falling asleep
Connie: when my phone chimed
Connie: curse my need to keep up to date.

Cap'n: oof
Cap'n: anyway ur boyfriend is currently sleeping on my floor

Connie: wow
Connie: just
Connie: wow
Connie: you didn't even give him the couch?

Cap'n: I TRIED
Cap'n: he just CRAWLED IN MY WINDOW
Cap'n: (which, like, not creepy at all btw)
Cap'n: and I tried to show him the couch and he just took his jacket off and yeeted himself onto the floor

Connie: uh-oh
Connie: was he using it like a pillow or covering his head with it

sadiekiller: a little of both?

Connie: whoo boy
Connie: that is a sad nest
Connie: a travel-sized one, anyway

sadiekiller: a what

Connie: it's a thing he did for amethyst a long time ago that stuck
Connie: it's like hanging out only with depression
Connie: it was like a 11 mile hike to town from where we parted earlier
Connie: and he worked himself to the bone
Connie: so just let him crash for the night okay?
Connie: i'll pick him up in the morning when he can function

sadiekiller: I know we joke a lot but
sadiekiller: srsly you guys worry me sometimes
sadiekiller: have u considered... I dunno? meds? therapy? whatever you might be comfortable with?

Connie: I appreciation the concern but like
Connie: what could I even say to a therapist
Connie: hey I spent a good chunk of my adolescne waiting for a war that DIDN'T HAPPEN
Connie: I used to spend late nights calling my bf to swap nightmares of how we'd die on the battlefield?
Connie: a bunch of promises we never had to keep?

Cap'n: yes exactly that

Connie: bitch u died
Connie: u got a scar
Connie: you got to have a story
Connie: you were the lucky one

Connie: look I'm tired and I'm mean when i'm tried
Connie: I'mma sleep and get steven in the morning

sadiekiller: ok

Connie seemed generally disheveled standing on the Barriga's doorstep; her hair was sticking up wildly, as if she'd decided against brushing it, and deep bags had made themselves at home under her eyes. Her white shirt and shorts were wrinkled and bunched from doubling as her pajamas.

She tried to force a smile. "I hear that sleeping thing is pretty sweet."

"Oughta try it some time," Lars agreed, though he didn't look at her as he said it. He stood aside with a carefully neutral look affixed to his face as the teenager quietly examined him. They gave no apologies.

"Connie!" half-slurred Steven, who eagerly wrapped an arm around her shoulder. His pink jacket was tied around his waist. "You're the best, Connie. I love you so much."

"Steven," Connie said, soft but firm. "You should've just gone to my house with me."

"I guess, but your mom gets all... weird."

"If my mom wants to hold onto toxic stereotypes of how couples are supposed to act, then let her. You need sleep too."

That provoked a chuckle from the teen. Steven glanced at the couple watching them and the humor fell from his features. "Um. Thanks, guys. For doing this."

"It's not a biggie, Steven," Sadie promised.

He winced and stared at his sandals. "It is, though."

Chapter Text

"Gonna be real? I totally googled flowers for this." Steven awkwardly held a white carnation between his thumb and forefinger, offering it to her. "Is this even slightly right?"

"Most people bring bundles, not singles, but otherwise it'll be fine."

A grimace passed his features. "Sorry, Sadie." He paused at the very edge of the graveyard. Steven's face paled. "Uh, where's the path?"

Sadie glanced behind her. "It's an old graveyard, Steven. It doesn't have one."

"But- but..." He swallowed. "What if I... step on someone?"

"You can wait in the car if you want."

Steven swallowed again and held onto her arm. Sadie noticed his feet rarely touched the ground as they quietly went past row after row of graves. The was the slightest hint of a chill in the air, thanks in no small part to the rain that had come down late last night. The grass was wet and slick. There were a few other people there, but no one spoke or looked at each other. It was a quiet little bubble. A tiny ball of grief per person.

"Here," Sadie said, stopping at a tiny headstone. It was flat and rectangular, pressed into the ground with precision. A little dragonfly was carved into the stone next to a name. "You've... really never been to a graveyard, have you?"

"No. Gems... don't do this sort of thing."

"Bury their dead?"

"Die, really," he said with a shrug. "We fall apart, we glitch, we become horrible mockeries of who we once were, but... we don't fully die, per se."

"Steven, that is... really specific."

"Yeah."

"And fucking horrifying."

"Yup."

"What about Mr. Universe's side of the family?"

Steven shrugged. "I don't know much about them. I don't think he's talked to any of them in a long time. Well, except for Uncle Andy." He paused, seeming to realize that he'd been talking about himself for far too long whilst standing in front of a grave and tried to think on what anime had taught him to say in this scenario. "What was he like?"

"Heck if I know," she admitted, looking just a smidge ashamed. "I wasn't... around. When it happened."

"Ah. Sorry. I just... dunno what to say? Or ask? Or not ask?"

Sadie seemed to break out of her trance. "I guess... whatever you'd want someone to say to you right now, in this situation."

Steven considered it. "...It wasn't your fault?"

"Maybe silence is the better option."

"Yes'm." The teen crouched down and stuck the stem in his mouth. That done, he put it into the soggy dirt, watching as the carnation straightened and bloomed brighter than ever. "Here we go."

"Aww, thanks." Sadie set her own bouquet of roses down, ignoring the way Steven's eyes skittered to the side. "Wait. How do we know that flower won't grow up like your watermelon guys did?"

"A coupla reasons, but mostly just a hope."

"Steven."

"Relax, Sadie. I need a seed to do that. And I've gotten a lot better at controlling my healing powers. I can even make sparkles out of blood now!" Steven smiled, but (thankfully) didn't offer to show her how. "And, hey. Whatever this is or isn't to you, it's not your fault."

"I know," she replied. "It's just... I dunno. It's stupid. I don't remember him, but I remember how hurt my mom was when she talked about him. I'd always come by before I knew she was visiting and tidy it up for her. It was like a weird pet project of mine; keep the grave pretty so mom will cry less. Or something."

"Oh, wow," Steven muttered.

"What?"

"I've never felt so... relatable. Related-to? Both?" Steven audibly shrugged. "It's not a grave, but... there's a statue. Of her."

Something small and sharp stabbed her in the stomach. She thought it might be sympathy. "Do you... go often?"

"No. I try not to go at all." He swallowed. "But if you ever... wanted to? We could."

"Why would I want to?"

"Everyone else does," he said in lieu of answering. "Sorry. I've never been in this situation before. Not exactly. My inner therapist is doing mental cartwheels to try and figure out where to take this conversation."

Sadie huffed out something relatively like a laugh. "Well, at least there's one thing we've got in common."

"It's a start," agreed Steven, sheepishly.

Starboy: so Ya'll're sensible people right

Cap'n: define sensible

Starboy: it's normal to bond over trauma right
Starboy: bc I've been doing it most of my life and I did it again today

sadiekiller: I felt very bonded with

Starboy: and I just dunno if Normal People do that sort of thing

glowstix: steven
glowstix: ur a magical boy with a murder girlfriend who Voltrons into a Cool Person and fight aliens
glowstix: just ride that wave man

Connie: I mean jeff and I have been good friends
Connie: since, yknow
Connie: I broke his arm

Pizzasux: honey that's called masochism

Connie: you joke but I've seen his internet history

Pizzasux: holy shit connie
Pizzasux: you just won
Pizzasux: this isn't even a competition and you Won

Connie: I was kidding I promise
Connie: I had my fair share of privacy invasion from my 'rents
Connie: I mean I've steen steven's history but that's wildly different since we were stevonnie
Connie: and also it's steven

Cap'n: STEEN STEVEN

Pizzasux: STEEN STEVEN

sadiekiller: STEEN STEVEN

Connie: oh god dammnit
Connie: I regret everything

Chapter Text

-Starboy added 2Cool4Skool to the chat!-

Starboy: Guys I've done it
Starboy: I've lamponed my whale
Starboy: I got buck on the chat

2Cool4Skool: I lost a bet

Connie: harpoon steven

Starboy: I STAND BY WHAT I TYPE
Starboy: unlike some of us

steensteven: hey

SteenSteven: wassup

STEENSTEVEN: hi buck

2Cool4Skool: what the fuck

Connie: it's a coordinated attack on my patience

Starboy: it was funny at the time

Connie: steven you've lost all smooching privileges

Starboy: GUYS WE GOTTA STOP THIS NOW
Starboy: PLEASE I'M BEGGING YA'LL

steensteven: oooh good idea steven

-steensteven changed their name to Yalldve-

Yalldve: ye that's right
Yalldve: no apostrophes
Yalldve: fite me

SteenSteven: lets be real this was getting old fast

-SteenSteven changed their name to PinkMufasa-

PinkMufasa: Ronnie ur turn

STEENSTEVEN: ...
STEENSTEVEN: can I keep mine?

Starboy: RONALDO MY SMOOCHING PRIVLAGES ARE ON THE LINE

STEENSTEVEN: MY OLD TITLE WASN'T EXACTLY BRINGING IN SUBSCRIBERS STEVEN

Starboy: two out of three is good, right?

Connie: did I stutter universe

2Cool4Skool: okay so this is clearly going over my head
2Cool4Skool: can I get a rollcall or smth

Starboy: Oh! Right! Duh.
Starboy: This is Steven

Connie: this is self-explanatory

Yalldve: Jenny

2Cool4Skool: I figured
2Cool4Skool: the reek of sarcasm was strong

PinkMufasa: Lars
PinkMufasa: I'm pink and I got Mufasa'd

Connie: wouldn't lion be mufasa
Connie: ergo making you simba
Connie: actually now that I think about it you're 100% nuka

PinkMufasa: I'm sorry whomst

Connie: sequel character
Connie: died dead trying to prove himself
Connie: he was Peak Lars Barriga

PinkMufasa: ANYWAY
PinkMufasa: sadiekiller is Sadie obvs, she's just busy with an interview rn and can't text

TheBitsTheBits: Peedee
TheBitsTheBits: you probably don't know me by name tbh
TheBitsTheBits: I'm the main worker at the Beach Citywalk Fries
TheBitsTheBits: I mostly just read and make the odd sarcastic remark about how nothing in life matters

2Cool4Skool: oh shit its you
2Cool4Skool: nice to meet u man

STEENSTEVEN: Ronaldo!
STEENSTEVEN: I run the hit blog Keep Beach City Weird!
STEENSTEVEN: which, fyi, just hit ten reblogs on my documentary series!

2Cool4Skool: you got anything about mothman
2Cool4Skool: i'd love to kiss a moth sometime

glowstix: that's an outdated meme dude
glowstix: also this is sc

2Cool4Skool: yet somehow still a huge mood

Starboy: Jenny is Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis, Onion is ︎Onion, and there's a couple others, but most of the time they're pretty quiet
Starboy: the chat was originally supposed to be an alert system, and I think they just wanna follow the guidelines Mayor Nanafua set

Yalldve: Neeeerrrrddddssssss
Yalldve: besides this is a great way to QnA about our buddies across the pond

2Cool4Skool: yeah?

Starboy: oh yeah sure
Starboy: whatever I can't get to Connie usually does

2Cool4Skool: true or false
2Cool4Skool: eggs

Starboy: is it bad I know exactly what you're referring too
Starboy: and as far as I know the answer is hell no
Starboy: but gems can shapeshift, so if they WANTED to, they probably could

Connie: hasn't Amethyst?
Connie: I know for a fact that she spent like a decade as a chicken back in the 1800s

Starboy: there's very few things Amethyst hasn't done
Starboy: and like
Starboy: I love her
Starboy: and ya'll
Starboy: but I also love my sanity enough to not ask

PinkMufasa: why is literally every question you get vaguely sexual?
PinkMufasa: u've brought watermelons to life
PinkMufasa: u brought ME back from Not Life
PinkMufasa: u travel the stars
PinkMufasa: what the heck

Connie: everyone's got their extraterrestrial vices I guess

Starboy: I'm always happy to see people being open and honest about their curiosities
Starboy: but also these are my moms
Starboy: so please not THAT open and honest

2Cool4Skool: so what is in the range of okay
2Cool4Skool: I just wanna make sure not to like
2Cool4Skool: mess up ur flow

Starboy: um... basically anything else?
Starboy: the chances you'll hit on something I haven't considered/had nightmares about/broke down over is
Starboy: marginally small

STEENSTEVEN: ooooh I have one!
STEENSTEVEN: I've always been curious about ur lifespan

Starboy: Honestly?
Starboy: I don't have an answer for that one
Starboy: gems live forever
Starboy: and my gem is part of me thru and thru
Starboy: but I'm still made up of fleshy bits
Starboy: so idk if I'll like
Starboy: lose the bod but be reimbursed with a gem bod
Starboy: or when I get older that'll just be that and a shadow will be left behind

glowstix: fuck man
glowstix: like which is worse

Starboy: option B
Starboy: option B is what my mom did to my family

sadiekiller: guys I stepped out for like an hour
sadiekiller: what are ya'll doing to steven

Starboy: nothing my brain hasn't done to me already

PinkMufasa: equally depressing follow-up but
PinkMufasa: what about ur sword gf?

Connie: Oh!
Connie: Steven and I have talked about that a lot
Connie: And we agree that... we're in this together
Connie: Regardless of whether we date forever or break up, we'll always be jam buds
Connie: And I wanna be by his side
Connie: So, when there should come a time where I feel Ready
Connie: We're gonna You this bitch

Starboy: and hopefully live together for a long time yet!
Starboy: and maybe with... smooches?

Connie: Pushing your luck Universe
Connie: but two out of three IS pretty good so
Connie: I'll consider it

glowstix: said it before and will say it again
glowstix: ya'll are heavy metal as FUCK

Starboy: the guitar is only for show, I promise
Starboy: I'm a ukulele guy at heart

Chapter Text

It's easy to forget, sometimes. It's easy to set up a show to congratulate Beach City on rising from the ashes again. It's easy to spot Steven near the front of the crowd. It's easy to ignore Greg and Barb next to him, grinning wildly while holding hands, and pull him on stage. Buck tosses him a guitar and the concert goes on. It's easy to twirl and dance around each other like they're in a musical.

It's easy to turn into light.

What's not as easy is Steven stumbling away mid-glow, eyes wide and haunted and hurt. The crowd breaks into cheers at what- to them- must be a showy bit of technique. Sadie reaches a hand out for him, and Steven...

Steven runs away.

And the show goes on, a bit more tense than usual.

sadiekiller: fuck shit
sadiekiller: guys did you see where he went

Connie: what you mean when you almost fused
Connie: and he ran off?
Connie: and you kept on fucking playing music?

sadiekiller: I couldn't just stop mid-show

Connie: granted, but still a dick move.

sadiekiller: are you mad at me?
sadiekiller: for wanting to talk to him?

Connie: I'm feeling exactly what I have to feel in this situation
Connie: Look
Connie: Fusion happens
Connie: It's fine
Connie: But you can't just fucking leave someone after a mess like that

sadiekiller: I literally had no choice here okay

PinkMufasa: can we focus for a second here?
PinkMufasa: bitching each other out won't find steven

Connie: if he doesn't want to be found he won't be
Connie: he can do this sort of thing
Connie: idk if you've heard of it
Connie: it's called floating

sadiekiller: Connie, please

Connie: The rest of the universe gets to use Steven as a punching bag
Connie: like hell am I gonna help his own fucking friends do it too

PinkMufasa: Look, you're angry
PinkMufasa: You're allowed to be
PinkMufasa: But how is deciding who he gets to see or not see any less controlling

Connie: don't
Connie: don't you fucking dare
Connie: fuck all of this
Connie: I'm done

STEENINGSTEVEN: so I came onto here to ramble on about the new season of Her-ra and how much I ship Nerd Princess and Angry Overlord and instead of lighthearted fun times I found explosions
STEENINGSTEVEN: wtf just happened

sadiekiller: tell you later
sadiekiller: do you know where steven is?

STEENINGSTEVEN: well I'm no steven expert or anything
STEENINGSTEVEN: but I'm preeety sure the roughly steven-shaped blob on top of the Big Donut is a good guess

"Hey, buddy. Mind if I join you?"

Steven made a vague grunt from under his jacket, which he had pulled over his head and face. Sadie awkwardly crept over beside him, the shadow of the Big Donut's big donut looming impressive and sadly not tasty above them.

"So," she went on. "Sad-nest?"

Steven nodded.

"Room for one more?"

"Sorry, this sad-nest is economy-size. It's only built for one sulky boy at a time."

Sadie laughed. "You don't have to feel bad, you know."

"Yes, I do," he replied. "I could've ruined your show! And I didn't even ask for permission first."

"I mean... did you hop up expecting to turn me into a living glow stick?"

"Of course not!" Steven's shoulders jerked. "But that's even worse. I'm supposed to be in control of my powers. That was a rookie Steven mistake."

"So what? I play wrong notes all the time."

"There's a different between playing a wrong note and drawing someone into your essence of light and magic to make a whole new being." Steven reluctantly pulled his head free and ruffled his curly hair. "Cripes, I hope this doesn't get back to the Diamonds. They'll throw such a fit. A failed fusion! In public! And after all the speeches Stevonnie gave them about the importance of fusion! We just got it legalized and everything." He tapped his fingers restlessly against his knee. "This is a huge mess."

"Hey, hey, c'mon." Sadie grabbed his cheek and moved his face. Steven's eyes stayed shut. "Look at me."

Steven hesitated. "I don't... I don't work like normal humans, Sadie. My body shapeshifts just like a Gem's. And especially with my mood, and-"

"Steven. I don't care."

He slowly opened his eyes. They were pink and sharp and very specifically-shaped. Sadie let out a low whistle. "They look pretty."

"I hate them." Steven gently brushed her hand away. "I only get them... when I remind myself of someone."

"Do the Gems know?"

He snorted.

She took the hint and changed the subject. "Connie's pretty pissed at me right now. I think she might shank me the next time we see each other."

"Yeah, she can be like that." A puff of laughter. "She's pretty protective."

"I noticed." Sadie gave his shoulder a solid pat. She didn't quite know how to swing affection with Steven now that he was, well, a teen. When he was short and pudgy it was easy to hug and ruffle hair and move on; that didn't fly anymore. "I've got a lot to learn about Gem culture- and you've got a lot to learn about human culture. We could teach each other. Make it an exchange student thing. How's that sound?"

Steven managed something vaguely resembling a smile. His pink eyes were faded to a dull red. "Sounds perfect."

Chapter Text

Starboy: I just realized I haven't asked ya'll what's going on recently and I need to rectify that
Starboy: what's going on ya'll?

PinkMufasa: ooooh a opening to talk about my very specific problems
PinkMufasa: hell yeah
PinkMufasa: the damn government is trying to decide if I'm allowed to change my name
PinkMufasa: fuck the Long L I'm Lars

glowstix: ur an adult????

PinkMufasa: CHRONOLGOICALLY yes
PinkMufasa: wait is that the right word
PinkMufasa: I MIGHT be spinning bullshit words here
PinkMufasa: anyway I died as a teen so my bod is still a teen
PinkMufasa: so the SuitsTM need to decide if we're going by my birth certificate or my bod.
PinkMufasa: which like
PinkMufasa: isn't a big deal or anything
PinkMufasa: my mom or dad can just sign for me
PinkMufasa: but it's the principle of the matter.

glowstix: dood that suuuucks
glowstix: fight the man

PinkMufasa: hell yeah
PinkMufasa: not to be hella overdramatic or whatever
PinkMufasa: but jesus didn't get brought back to life to be misnomered and I'll be damned if I'll take anything less

Yalldve: GUESS WHO GOT ARRESTED

2Cool4Skool: damn jenny
2Cool4Skool: without us??

Yalldve: no no not me
Yalldve: even better
Yalldve: someone with my face but none of my fabulous one-liners

Starboy: Jenny??????????

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: I resent the one-liner quip
Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: but yes I technically went to the police last week

Starboy: WHY!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: overdue ticket
Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: I went down there and they took my prints and stuff
Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: idk if that makes me a criminal or whatever

glowstix: are they even allowed to take prints for stuff like that

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: idk

Starboy: Ngl even after 16 yrs of DeathTM cops scare me more than anything else

Yalldve: why tho
Yalldve: you're white
Yalldve: white-passing?

Starboy: half-white
Starboy: but the idea of cops is inherently terrifying
Starboy: like Homeworld is full of castes
Starboy: but if you step outta line there's no gems specifically there to stop you
Starboy: Agates keep Gems in line but if they get their butts kicked no one can rlly stop you or anything
Starboy: they have tech but the tech isn't People. It's tech.
Starboy: if the Diamonds had had smth like cops than there's no way the Earth wouldn't've been rubble thousands of years ago

2Cool4Skool: fo shizzle man
2Cool4Skool: we need better checks and balances for the ppl
2Cool4Skool: the SuitsTM got all the power and it ain't right

PinkMufasa: so since we're going full Fuck The Man
PinkMufasa: where tf is your sword gf

Starboy: Connie? Idk for sure
Starboy: She said smth about getting control of her anger
Starboy: Then she and Pearl took off on the warp pad with a bunch of supplies and That Look

PinkMufasa: When was this?

Starboy: Three days ago, I think? Time doesn't move the same on Homeworld
Starboy: Wait I checked it's been like a week

2Cool4Skool: steven you know I respect your laidback nature
2Cool4Skool: but one of these days youre gonna go on a trip and fall down a hole or smth
2Cool4Skool: then what?

Starboy: I'd float out?

2Cool4Skool: your powers are broke. there's no cell service. now what.

Starboy: Buck if I can't float then there's bigger problems going on than my location

2Cool4Skool: being purposefully obtuse I see
2Cool4Skool: I get that

Starboy: Relax, guys
Starboy: Mr. and Mrs. Maheswaran know she's with us
Starboy: It's a rule.

"Pearl, I think I forgot to tell my mom we were going out."

"You what?" Pearl lowered her spear with a noise of displeasure. She pinched her nose. "Connie, you know how badly your mother takes to this sort of thing. You can't just-"

Connie surged forward, knocking the blade aside with a smirk. "Gotcha."

Pearl blinked at her. She huffed out a laugh, still in shock, and booped her nose. "That was a dirty trick, Connie. It won't work on strangers you'll meet in battle."

"I'll just throw sand in their eyes."

"Simple, brutual, and more than viable on a planet covered in muck. I like it!" The Gem vanished her spear and silently gestured for Connie to put her sword in her scabbard. She did so. "Now, let's break for a bit, shall we? I'm dying to get into those hot springs."

Connie shuffled her feet, considering. "I'll... go get us firewood."

"We have firewood, Connie."

"More firewood?"

"You don't have to soak with me if you don't want to, but you absolutely need to do a relaxing activity."

She reluctantly shucked her scabbard from her shoulder, setting it on the ground with precision. She gave less thought to her clothes, which went in a heap on top of it. Connie flexed her fingers, keeping a quiet tally of the new nicks and callouses she'd created.

Pearl glanced up as she approached. The Gem had vanished her own clothes; though that was mostly just out of convenience than it was any real concern for the light that felt almost like fabric and held liquids like fabric too. There was something inherently fragile in Pearl's build, Connie reflected. There was no mass to her. Just seamless light, made into something small and delicate to the eye. Now that she thought about it, Connie still wasn't sure how Pearls were made. Special water planets?

"Not coming?" Pearl asked, rhetorically, as Connie dipped her toes into the water. "It's not too hot for you, is it?"

"No, it's fine. I'm just... not in the mood, I guess."

"For soaking?"

"For relaxing."

Pearl's lips tilted into a mockery of a smile, small and sad. "Are you ever?"

Connie laughed. "No, ma'am." She kicked up a wave. "I know it's... silly. You all have gone through so much more than I have. And your situation with Homeworld now is shaky and tense as is without me carrying a sword around. But I just want to feel in control. I want to feel like I can help."

"Trauma is a flighty thing, Connie. It doesn't help anyone to compare it."

"Yes, ma'am, I know. But you went through a war. I just saw the end results."

Pearl shrugged her lithe shoulders. "The war was hard, but I've had time." Not enough time, Connie filled in. A couple thousand years meant nothing to Gems. "Steven's worried about you, Connie. He says the outbursts have gotten worse."

"Yes, ma'am," she admitted begrudgingly. "The internet makes it really easy to be mean."

"Maybe some time apart from it will help."

"Maybe. But then the anger just builds up."

"It's not anger, Connie." Pearl breathed hard through her nose. "It's helplessness. That's far worse than anger." A white hand grabbed hers, leading her into the waves. It felt like sinking into a warm bed. "It's hard to change how you feel about things, and it's even harder to believe other people when they say nice things, but you mean so much to us, Connie. We're so glad you're here."

Connie tilted her head. "But you'd say that about any human who helps care for Steven. Don't pretend you wouldn't."

"It's more than that."

"If you say so, ma'am." She carefully edged away, ignoring the hurt that flickered across Pearl's face. "If you say so." 

Starboy: it's just NOT okay

STEENSTEVEN: how is the star not a uniform?????
STEENSTEVEN: it's a symbol of your allegiance to the extraterrestrials!

Starboy: it's a cute shirt my DAD made me that I liked the aesthetic of
Starboy: and yeah stars are the crystal gems thing
Starboy: but it's not like every time I look at a star I'm like 'oh worm it's my people'

Connie: steven it's 100% a symbol

Starboy: CONNIE I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME

Connie: to the end of every ding-dang star
Connie: which is a symbol of the Crystal Gems
Connie: which I'm a member of
Connie: and I've got the tattoo to prove it

PinkMufasa: I'm sorry you have the WHAT

Connie: chill it's super small
Connie: the gems and I agreed it'd be a good way to show my pride since clothes get destroyed easy

Starboy: Lucky :(
Starboy: idk what'd happen if I introduced my magic guts to ink but it prlly wouldn't be pretty

PinkMufasa: the more I learn of your day-to-day life the more scared I am of you

Connie: good
Connie: you should be

Yalldve: internet connie just REEKS of Big Dick Energy

Chapter Text

sadiekiller: I know we do these a lot but
sadiekiller: question

STEENSTEVEN: QNA QNA QNA

Starboy: I don't mind at all!
Starboy: Actually it's, like, the opposite
Starboy: It's been nice to see humans so interested in Gem stuff

sadiekiller: good good
sadiekiller: soooo castes amiright
sadiekiller: I know homeworld has/had them
sadiekiller: but I don't know the first thing about them?

Starboy: WHOOOOOO BOY
Starboy: Ngl that's a big ol' can of worms I don't have all the answers on
Starboy: But I sure as heck can try!

STEENSTEVEN: ooooh can I take notes

Starboy: Ronaldo if I'm willing to share it on a very public site
Starboy: I'm willing to share it on Tumble

STEENSTEVEN: sweeeet

Starboy: -claps hands together- Alright so first things first
Starboy: There's been three Eras of Gems
Starboy: Those Eras mean a lot towards builds/styles/etc

Connie: Personally I'm fond of the weird dichotomy as to whether shoes are fashionable are not

Starboy: Sandals are like the fruit cake of shoes
Starboy: It's great

Starboy: Anyway as I was saying; three Eras of Gems
Starboy: Era 1 is the original shebang. It lasted almost as long as space itself, all things considered
Starboy: Era 1 is all about Big Ladies being higher than Smaller Ladies
Starboy: Diamonds, Quartzes, Agates, Bismuths- the smallest is bigger than an adult male human
Starboy: There's a couple of Little Ladies who are higher up, but that's bc they're Rare and the Diamonds didn't want them getting 'ideas'
Starboy: Sapphires, for example, can see the future, but due to their size can't rlly do much of anything to fight against fate
Starboy: At least not when fate is a Bigger Lady

PinkMufasa: I say this a lot
PinkMufasa: and I realize it's prlly getting old by now
PinkMufasa: but, like, seriously, Steven
PinkMufasa: what the fuck

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: History is shitty all across the galaxy
Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: I wish I was surprised.

Starboy: The start of Era 2 is kind of hard to place
Starboy: The best I can say is that it was around the end of the rebellion for Earth

Yalldve: that recent?

Starboy: Yuuuup
Starboy: My mom pulled an Anime Character and faked her own death, which led to the plummeting spirits of the Diamonds
Starboy: White and Blue did very little work, leaving Yellow to "I'm The Manager" for everyone for forever
Starboy: Meanwhile Blue basically just lived in my mom's room and White t-posed in a giant robot head

PinkMufasa: STEVEN WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK

Starboy: This is also when resources started plummeting, leading to a huge recession in new Gems
Starboy: Basically all Gems from this Era are tiny af, and the fancy ones get to, like, be confident in that?
Starboy: Like my buddy Peridot from Little Homeworld had to wear stilts, but that Aquamarine got to be super short
Starboy: And any new Big Gems were much more blocky and rudimentary looking, like a Topaz.

sadiekiller: what kind of recession does that?

Starboy: hrrrnnngggg
Starboy: Listen
Starboy: I will never say this out loud or in person
Starboy: Because it's mean
Starboy: But Gems
Starboy: We're parasites
Starboy: We suck nutrients out of the dirt to form, leaving husks behind us
Starboy: I mean ya'll know about the giant dirt hole out in the countryside? Gems did that.

sadiekiller: Every time a new Gem comes out?

Starboy: Yup.
Starboy: It's pretty fudged.

glowstix: so if ya'll need, like, a Certain Amount of Dirt to exist
glowstix: what happens if there's like
glowstix: not enough dirt

Starboy: Defects happen
Starboy: Ya'll gotta understand that Homeworld is one big cookie cutter ass place
Starboy: Everyone is built the exact same, has the same voice, etc
Starboy: For a long time defects were just killed
Starboy: Amethyst is a defect. She's supposed to be, like, as tall as Garnet and buffer than her too.
Starboy: And it literally doesn't matter, but on Homeworld, It Matters.

PinkMufasa: I mean Amethyst can be rlly obnoxious
PinkMufasa: no offense
PinkMufasa: but she doesn't deserve that shit

Starboy: Nobody does
Starboy: And here we are! In Era 3!
Starboy: Righting the wrongs of my idiot Aunts and building places for corruptions and other hurt/lost Gems to go!
Starboy: On Earth!
Starboy: Bc they don't feel comfy on Homeworld
Starboy: Bc it's not that changed yet
Starboy: But I'm working on it!

sadiekiller: VERY CONCERNING ISSUES ASIDE
sadiekiller: what are ya'll gonna do about the recession?

Starboy: That
Starboy: Is a very good question
Starboy: We're working on it.

2Cool4Skool: so this is gonna hit all the soft spots

Starboy: Shoot

2Cool4Skool: wouldnt having so many Gems on Earth be a hazard to your already iffy numbers

Starboy: ? I don't follow

2Cool4Skool: since they could
2Cool4Skool: yknow
2Cool4Skool: fall for a human
2Cool4Skool: and... pull a you-know-who

Starboy: oh
Starboy: Oh.
Starboy: Not... necessarily.

Connie: Want me to take this part?

Starboy: Yes pls
Starboy: I'm gonna swing by ur place with Chinese if that's cool

Connie: Hell yes

2Cool4Skool: Fuck
2Cool4Skool: Fudge
2Cool4Skool: Im rlly sorry Steven

Starboy: nonononon don't be
Starboy: its a legit question
Starboy: and yall deserve to know
Starboy: and honestly I just don't have the spoons to start with the things my mom has done

Connie: S'okay I got this
Connie: Easy answer is no

PinkMufasa: No?

Connie: No.
Connie: A Gem can shapeshift the parts and have kids.
Connie: Remember when I said Amethyst's laid eggs? It's basically the same principle
Connie: Rose made the decision to have the first full hybrid, complete with the gem
Connie: And if another Gem makes that decision, that's up to them and we should respect that

Starboy: Unless theyre doing it to be like her
Starboy: Bc some gems are Like That and
Starboy: I get it respecting diamonds or whatever
Starboy: butIcantberesponsibleforanotherme

2Cool4Skool: Fuck Steven I rlly didn't mean to do this

Starboy: sokay sokay
Starboy: just lemme get my Chinese and cuddle in a blankie and ill be fine
Starboy: ish
Starboy: love yall pls don't stop asking questions just bc im a biohazard mentally

Chapter Text

Starboy: guys I have an announcement
Starboy: I think I might have mommy issues

PinkMufasa: YOU JSUT REALIZED THIS NOW?!!?!?!

Starboy: IT WAS A LONG PROCESS LARS

PinkMufasa: remember that time I was a douchecanoue and u yelled at me

Starboy: specificy

PinkMufasa: the weird moss
PinkMufasa: you chewed me out- which fair ye- but then you had to go on a rant about how u never knew ur mom but she was cooler than me and shit
PinkMufasa: bc that made you madder than me bein a douchecanoue

Starboy: That was one time

Yalldve: not to mention that time you told us you were pretty sure you were ur mom
Yalldve: and ur other moms might lowkey blame u for being ur mom
Yalldve: not to like spill tea or whatever but that was pretty mommy issues

Starboy: Wait no that's not
Starboy: Aw fudge it literally is
Starboy: Am I the last person to know???

PinkMufasa: yes

Starboy: Connie?

Connie: I'm not legally obligated to respond to this.
Connie: But in that vein I assume the visit with the Roses went well

Starboy: THEY'RE RLLY SUPER NICE I SWEAR
Starboy: I'M THE ONE WITH SUPER GLARING ISSUES NOT THEM

STEENSTEVEN: you mean I could've interviewed an entire group of big buff ladies
STEENSTEVEN: and you didn't tell me?

Starboy: I'm sorry okay I panicked
Starboy: One tried to feed me

2Cool4Skool: aksmodldockdocsl
2Cool4Skool: did you let her

Starboy: I have a weak will
Starboy: Idk I just
Starboy: Can I say smth stupid?

PinkMufasa: Steven u started this conversation with "I think I have mommy issues"
PinkMufasa: You can't go much lower than that

Starboy: Yeah but I realize this is stupid
Starboy: Hindsight, I guess?
Starboy: Anyway, I just kind of hoped I was done

glowstix: with?

Starboy: Feeling this way
Starboy: About her, I mean
Starboy: I thought that, since I put all that 'am I me or am I just a rose in a trenchcoat' stuff to rest, things would be...
Starboy: Easier.
Starboy: I mean I don't feel this way when I look at her picture or anything

Connie: Steven do u want me to psychoanalyze this or do you want sweet-nothings
Connie: I know you'll want both eventually but like
Connie: Right now

Starboy: Psychoanalyze the HECK outta me strawberry
Starboy: I don't feel bad about feeling bad or anything
Starboy: Mostly I'm just confused?
Starboy: Like why now?

PinkMufasa: I mean
PinkMufasa: Why did I only start crying abt missing home when we could see the Earth
PinkMufasa: It's just timing dude

Connie: Lars actually has a point there

PinkMufasa: I do????

Connie: Ye
Connie: Steven you've always been in danger
Connie: Everything has always been one big ass stresser
Connie: Either you were putting ur family back together or trying not to die
Connie: Or both
Connie: Now that things have settled a bit and u feel more comfortable in ur powers and stuff
Connie: Ur brain's basically going "oh hey it's safe let's lose our damn minds" and tossing every bit of trauma at you at once.

Yalldve: not to like 'u too' this shit or whatever
Yalldve: but connie weren't you there for most of that

Connie: Yes and I think we all can agree I am far from the Most Healthy Person
Connie: I started reading up on this stuff for self-diagnosis, not out of any real interest

Starboy: Srry

Connie: Don't be
Connie: I'd do it again
Connie: But like I was saying, I've only started having nightmares about Aqua and Topaz the past few months
Connie: And that was like two yrs ago
Connie: Homeworld hasn't been breathing down our necks so my brain has decided we're up and raring to confront the trauma of being held hostage
Connie: And honestly let's be real that's not nearly the worst trauma we've faced just as a duo

2Cool4Skool: QnA what's the worst thing you've ever seen

Starboy: I will answer every question except that one
Starboy: We don't talk about The Thing

2Cool4Skool: Understandable have a good day

Chapter Text

sadiekiller: happy turkey day ya'll
sadiekiller: hey steven my mom wants you to come to this potluck next weekend

Yalldve: not this weekend?

sadiekiller: best deals the week after
sadiekiller: which is her way of saying she forgot to cook her dish

Yalldve: lol

HereComesAThot: Lemme just say ya'll have excellent timing
HereComesAThot: we JUST came into cell range
HereComesAThot: big ol' mission

PinkMufasa: kind of figured lol
PinkMufasa: it's only been like a week
PinkMufasa: space hijinks?

HereComesAThot: nah a corruption
HereComesAThot: there's a lot more of them on Earth than you'd think
HereComesAThot: most of them hide away unless they sense gem activity, so it's hard to get to them sometimes
HereComesAThot: but now that we got LH we're just. Getting corruptions out of the dang woodwork

PinkMufasa: ah
PinkMufasa: sorry to hear that

HereComesAThot: no no it's a good thing
HereComesAThot: I mean it sucks it happened
HereComesAThot: but now it's fixable
HereComesAThot: anyway to answer Sadie steven will 100% be there unless he can't be

sadiekiller: you eat, right?

HereComesAThot: ye, why?

sadiekiller: figured i'd bring ya'll some food
sadiekiller: I mean ur fridge is prlly gross by now, right?

HereComesAThot: oh prlly, I haven't checked
HereComesAThot: it won't be an issue will it?

sadiekiller: nah i'm craving burgers
sadiekiler: cool with the gems?

HereComesAThot: oh ye definitely
HereComesAThot: they've been meaning to see you anyway
HereComesAThot: theyre like... rlly nosy abt Mr. Dad's life
HereComesAThot: and lowkey I think it wigs them out more than it did us that he's dating
HereComesAThot: just a warning they WILL ask awkward questions
HereComesAThot: bc they have like no social skills
HereComesAThot: but if you tell them to chill they will
HereComesAThot: I think

Sadie went to Pepe's Burgers. She knew about the jingle, and knew it was a bit of a inside joke in the Universe household; and, hey, who didn't love a good old-fashioned cheeseburger? She went and she got it (plain, since she didn't know Stevonnie's likes/dislikes) and she tromped up the steps to the door, intending to knock. She didn't have to.

"Oh," said Sadie, blinking at the mountain of woman in front of her. "Hey... Garnet."

"Sadie."

"How long have you been... holding this door open?"

"Yes."

"Okay." She stepped inside the house and was instantly bathed in the warmth of the fireplace. Sitting on the barstools was Amethyst and Stevonnie, gleefully sharing tips and tricks from the battle. They were caked in mud. Across the way was Pearl, leaning her elbows on the counter while trying to get one or both of them to take a shower.

Stevonnie's head turned slightly, and a single black eye caught Sadie's. The fusion smiled so wide it looked painful. "Sadie! Food! Food from Sadie!"

Amethyst sat up. "Num-nums!"

"I only brought one burger?" Sadie awkwardly passed them the bag and soda. "I didn't think you guys ate?"

"I require sustenance!" Amethyst said, slamming her hands on the table. "Give me burgers or sacrifice a lamb in my honor!"

"Oh, please," Pearl said. She fixed Sadie a smile. "We're fine, Sadie. Thank you."

"Don't speak for me, mortal!"

"Amethyst, I'm literally eons older than you."

"Pics or it didn't happen."

Stevonnie barked out a laugh. Sadie helped herself to the last remaining bar stool, watching the activities around her with varied levels of interest. She'd been inside Steven's house before, of course. Most people had. But it was rare all the Gems were together in it, or so accommodating towards humans. "Is Garnet gonna hold that door open all night?"

"No idea." Stevonnie leaned back slightly. "You coming in, Garnet?"

Garnet reluctantly did so. "Was just lookin' at the stars."

Somehow that snowballs into some kind of sleepover. The Gems come in and out from the back, a place Stevonnie doesn't bat an eye at nor explain why it constantly seems to be changing colors. Steven's sleeping clothes are a bit big on her, but Connie's aren't built for someone thicker than a stick, so it's nicer of two evils.

(Stevonnie doesn't explain why there's an entire drawer of various outfits for Connie in Steven's dresser, either- and Sadie knows damn well they aren't Steven's, because Steven's just as fat as she is.)

(Also because Steven keeps his dresses hung in his closet.)

"That is a very big picture," Sadie said as she climbed the stairs. Rose's portrait is something she's always known about, but- well, before it'd been high up. Now it's right in front of her face. "Did you put this here?"

"Nope! Bismuth did."

"Have I met Bismuth?"

"Probably not. She likes to hang out around lava." Stevonnie impatiently gestured for her to follow. "You'd like her, though. She'd make you armor! Or a weapon! Probably something sharp and pointy."

"Your friends scare me," Sadie replied, mostly as a joke. Stevonnie snorted and shrugged in a what can you do sort of way. They plopped down on their bed. "The Gems seem pretty cool about me. You hyped it up so much, I figured-"

"Oh they were one hundred percent putting on their cool mom faces. They did the same thing when Connie started coming over, but then she found Pearl sobbing over a stack of period romance novels and they kind of dropped it?"

"Actually sad sobbing or nerd sobbing?"

"Nerd sobbing. She'd just finished a huge whole long series."

"Big oof."

Stevonnie propped their leg on their knee. "Okay, but seriously, you can come over whenever you want. We've only got one bed but we've got triple the pure mom energy."

"I dunno, man. I kind of feeling like I'm busting in?"

"You think I didn't?" Stevonnie asked. "I know it's weird. It's really, really weird. And the Gems are especially weird around humans. But they got used to Connie, and then me, and they already like you. There's a whole 'nother family waiting for you, if you want it."

Sadie pursed her lips. "Why do I feel like I'll be having this same conversation with Steven?"

"I mean, you'll have to tell him what a potluck is to start with, then go from there, but he loves having new human contact so much he'll probably body-check your fam."

"That is... I mean, it's not inspiring, but. It's a start? I think?" Sadie paused. "How does Steven not know what a potluck is?"

"I'm pretty sure all of the Gems refuse to discuss the concept because if Amethyst found out she'd eat the entire buffet and then the people when they complained."

"You know that's fair."

Chapter Text

"Heya, big boy!" Barb eagerly wrapped her arms around Steven's neck, pulling him down to her level. "A bit bigger than usual, I see."

"I'm a bit overdressed," Steven said awkwardly, pulling back. He had a knee-length watermelon dress and garishly bright white heels. "I just wanted to make a good first impression, you know?"

"Kiddo, it's a potluck, not a job interview." She gestured to her own clothes- a stained up blue shirt and gray sweatpants. "Just dress to your comfort level."

"Perfect," said Steven, who felt absolutely uncomfortable surrounded by so many strange people. "I think I nailed it."

"Just grab whatever you want, alright? Plates are over there."

"But... I didn't bring anything."

"Aww, that's fine, sweetie. There's always next year." Barb gently knocked their shoulders together, smiling so wide Steven thought it must hurt. "And don't be shy about introducing yourself, you hear? We're all pretty agreeable folks."

"Steven," he answered. "Just Steven, please. I... have a thing about my name, I guess. I like knowing other people know it." His ears flared red. "Oh, gosh, that sounds horrible."

Barb gave him a solid squeeze. "Sounds pretty reasonable to me, Steven."

Steven doesn't know what to do with that, exactly, so he awkwardly shuffled off to the food. Children eagerly pushed and shoved towards the deserts. Adults chattered on and on about places and people he didn't really know. There was a lot of staring going on, he noticed, chin sinking into his shoulders. He hated how hard it was to start a conversation with people who didn't immediately try to kill him. Maybe if he grabbed a kitchen knife and let them have a go?

"Heya, stchuball!" said a familiar voice, and Steven relaxed slightly as a warm hand touched his back. Greg smiled up at him. "I swear, I look away for a second and you grow ten inches."

"It's just the heels."

Greg tilted his head to look at them. "I don't remember those. You buy those?"

"Found 'em in Amethyst's room." Steven clacked them together, almost eating the ground in his efforts. "Also I have never worn heels this high and kind of hate them."

His father steadied him. "You bring any backup shoes?"

"No, I just wanted to look fancy."

"That's silly, son. They don't even match the dress."

Steven pouted. "People are staring at me."

"You're a pretty tall boy, Steven. The heels make you gargantuan."

"What if... they don't like me?"

Greg paused. "Well, if they don't, then they're jerks who aren't worth your time. If it's because of the dress, they're not worth your time but they are worth a good slug to the face."

"Oh," said Steven, multiple things clicking at once. "Is that what happened with Uncle Andy last year?"

"Hey, I love Andy, but he's a bit of a dingus."

"I thought he liked the dress?"

"He did, once we cooled off and had a long talk about toxic masculinity and embracing things you love regardless of gender norms. He's a dingus, but he loves you enough to learn all the stuff he was too stubborn to learn before."

Steven sighed. It was a mix of stress and relief. "That means a lot to me, dad."

"Want some help meeting people?"

"Yes, please. Sorry."

"Don't apologize, kiddo. Everybody gets anxious as these sorts of things."

By the end of the night, Steven had had more hugs from people with heartbeats and pulses than he'd had in perhaps his entire life. He walked with his heels held between his fingers, and when he saw Barb sneak a quick peck on Greg's check... well.

He felt okay about it.

Chapter Text

STEENSTEVEN: wassup ya'll i'm currently hiding in my old treehouse looking for yetis to photograph

PinkMufasa: What
PinkMufasa: Wait
PinkMufasa: No
PinkMufasa: Dude why would a yeti show up in beach city

STEENSTEVEN: It's wintertime

Yalldve: it snows like once a year
Yalldve: and that was last week
Yalldve: it's like a solid thirty outside rn

STEENSTEVEN: exactly! a perfectly chilly warm place to meet up with his cousin bigfoot

glowstix: this is the worst combo for my high ass brain to consider
glowstix: but we're here and the rave lights are jammin

STEENSTEVEN: ok but seriously I'm bored and my toes are freezin
STEENSTEVEN: tell me wassup so I can keep busy until the blur Emerges

Connie: oh I'm not doing much today thanks
Connie: just
Connie: yknow
Connie: getting the 8 hrs of sleep humans require
Connie: unlike some of us

Starboy: Connie I stg

Connie: bitch

Starboy: I'm a teacher which means i'm legally obligated to say don't cuss

Connie: steven quartz universe I am sixteen fucking years old
Connie: if I wanna say fuck-fuck-fuckety-shit I sure as fuck will

PinkMufasa: oh shit
PinkMufasa: the girls are fffffiiiiigggghhhhttteeeennnnn

Starboy: Connie can we please not do this on a messenger app
Starboy: I mean can we at least switch it to a private chat

Connie: normally I would respect ur boundaries universe
Connie: but this is a self-care thing
Connie: and I literally cannot get u into self-care without an army's worth of peer pressure
Connie: so you can be mad and hurt at me and I will take it but I will take it knowing you're doing right by yourself

Yalldve: yaaaasssssss girl
Yalldve: spill that TEA

Connie: Gladly

Starboy: Oh here we go

Connie: so we were talking last night right
Connie: and he tells me he's got this thing going where once a week he treats himself
Connie: and I'm, like, pumped? Yasss queen? Treat yoself you work hard?
Connie: I ask him what his treat was this week and he says
Connie: and I quote,
Connie: "Well, last week I played Steven Tag with the Gems, so I think this week I'll let myself get a full eight hours for once."
Connie: BITCH

PinkMufasa: BITCH

Yalldve: Oh biiiittttcccchhh

STEENSTEVEN: wait you guys are getting sleep

Starboy: I sleep just fine alright
Starboy: I just enjoy getting up early to work on tasks

Connie: Steven u might be a morning person
Connie: but like
Connie: you ain't a Morning Person

Starboy: Somebody has to do all the things that keep this project running alright

Connie: that somebody doesn't have to be just you

Starboy: Connie I'm not doing this again
Starboy: I said no.

Connie: I don't mind helping!
Connie: we both know I'm good at paperwork
Connie: and Stevonnie would rock the parent-teacher conferences

Starboy: You have school stuff to focus on too
Starboy: Maybe once school lets out for the summer

Connie: Steven.

Starboy: Absolutely not Maheswaran.

glowstix: I feel like I'm missing like three or four sentences of dialogue here

PinkMufasa: oh big mood
PinkMufasa: but I love how even ur fights are polite

Yalldve: I'm getting invested personally
Yalldve: Shoo his ass to bed girl
Yalldve: You got this girl

Connie: I've offered to cut high school a bit early, that's all. I've got more than enough credits.

Starboy: Yeah, now.
Starboy: You didn't when you "offered"

Connie: I'm a Crystal Gem
Connie: everybody's made sacrifices to get to where we are now
Connie: I'm not above taking a few myself

Starboy: Bitch

Connie: Bitch
Connie: Go to sleep

Starboy: I've got a lot of work to do before I can rest, okay?
Starboy: That's just how adults be

Connie: I mean same but you gotta rest

PinkMufasa: UR BOTH KIDS
PinkMufasa: Fuck off with this 'we gotta throw our lives away' shit
PinkMufasa: How bout this- sign me up to volunteer with organizing

Starboy: We don't have a volunteer option yet
Starboy: Gotta work out the kinks first

PinkMufasa: Alright I was being polite before but fuck that
PinkMufasa: I'm coming over tommorrow morning and we're getting shit settled and YOU'RE getting some goddamn sleep.
PinkMufasa: And before u start about the bakery I'mma bake a shitload of pastries and bring them and my crew over to share them

Yalldve: I'll have what Lars is having tbh
Yalldve: Better than working at the restaurant

glowstix: groovy beats with groovy friends
glowstix: also I kind of wanna hotbox ur van again steven
glowstix: like maybe during our break or whatever

Starboy: Yeah that tracks
Starboy: But ya'll don't have to do this. Seriously.

Yalldve: I mean if ur girl is too busy to kick ur ass we'll happily take over

Connie: I'll leave you to it, then
Connie: Make sure to kick his heating blanket on- konks him out every time

Starboy: WOWIE CAN'T BELIEVE ALL THESE CONFIDENTIAL SECRETS ARE GETTING OUT TODAY
Starboy: I SURE DO LOVE MY GIRLFRIEND

STEENSTEVEN: I mean if my toes don't fall off I'll come
STEENSTEVEN: To volunteer and to nap

glowstix: hows monster hunting

STEENSTEVEN: Insert Moby Dick quote here

glowstix: I'll take that as shitty

Chapter Text

Starboy: so my dad lost his hair recently

PinkMufasa: steven im srry to tell u this but he's been losing his hair for a long time now
PinkMufasa: it's called going bald

Starboy: I'm not talking about going bald
Starboy: I'd add cuss words but I'm tryna be a decent role model

TheBitsTheBits: I'm not!
TheBitsTheBits: Smartass motherfucking cotton candy lookin shitheap.

PinkMufasa: wow damn peedee

TheBitsTheBits: just giving our illustrious spaceman a proper earthling farewell

PinkMufasa: oh right that reminds me

-PinkMufasa changed their name to Cap'n-

Cap'n: it just feels right you know

Yalldve: boo you already used that one
Yalldve: chat names aren't plastic recycling them ain't sexy

Starboy: BACK TO WHY I CALLED U HERE
Starboy: In a recent spat my father bravely sacrificed his locks to escape a gruesome fate
Starboy: And it's kinda bumming him out
Starboy: So I figured, hey, I'm ordained, let's have a funeral and show him just how much his hair meant to the people in his life

Cap'n: I'm sorry you're WHAT

Connie: you think he's kidding but he's not
Connie: I've seen the paperwork

Starboy: A lot of Gems find marriage to be this super cute and super hip Earth thing, so I figured it wouldn't hurt to, yknow, be legally able to marry them
Starboy: Also my mini-moms asked and I love them so I did it
Starboy: Again besides the point
Starboy: Let's give my dad's styling looks one last farewell

STEENSTEVEN: I could use some shitposting today, why not

Starboy: Alrighty
Starboy: We're here today to remember the many years of LooksTM Greg Universe's hair gave us
Starboy: From bedhead to Meeting The Parents smooth to that time he got an entire cone of cotton candy in it
Starboy: It was a true unit and will be missed

sadiekiller: it awed children for many years
sadiekiller: and those it didn't awe shook with fear every time it whipped in the wind
sadiekiller: wait shit

-sadiekiller changed their name to LookingForward-

LookingForward: it's not the most original but it's a draft so it doesn't have to be

Starboy: ANYONE ELSE WANNA CHANGE THEIR NAME BEFORE WE CONTINUE

Yalldve: I'm good thnx

glowstix: this is my essence lol

2Cool4Skool: man I'm in college u think I got time to chnge this
2Cool4Skool: I barely have the time to breathe rn

LookingForward: can we add Shep?
LookingForward: they really liked meeting all of ya'll

Starboy: ye sure
Starboy: is it cool if I wait until after this tho?

LookingForward: oh yeah sorry, continue the sermon

Starboy: We will all miss his lucious locks
Starboy: But the memories of its bravery will live on!
Starboy: My dad's hair has singlehandedly saved entire breakfasts from touching van floor before
Starboy: I mean we couldn't eat it after but it was still a ten point save

Connie: Mr. Universe's hair has saved me from frostbite
Connie: by taking all the cold into its own
Connie: bc he showered right before walking me home in the middle of a snow storm
Connie: I owe it my life and will promptly name my first child Sasquatch after it

Starboy: Connie pls
Starboy: Sasquatch WISHES it had that kind of style

glowstix: mr gregs hair was definitely the defining feature of rock-n-roll
glowstix: every time he got on stage and that huge ass mop started blowing?
glowstix: miracles of music were born my doods

Cap'n: it only hit me in the face once while I waited behind him on a windy day

Starboy: A true gentleman
Starboy: Trendsetting
Starboy: RIP in peace 198smth to last week
Starboy: And may the new, Disney-esque hairdo he sports manage to live up to even a portion of it

Connie: think of it as a right of passage Mr. Universe
Connie: every girl dreams of losing their hair in a dramatic fashion to banish oppressive forces
Connie: to think I paid like thirty bucks to do it at some lame salon

Yalldve: I had to sneak outta my house the first time
Yalldve: You've lost so much but it's a victory for certain teen girls everywhere
Yalldve: respect the rebellion and grieve the rebellion duder
Yalldve: also can you throw another bbq soon I love ur hamburgers

Starboy: Stars bless, hallelujah, amen.

Chapter Text

Steven woke up to a hand smashing into his jaw. His head flew back, eyes wide, as Connie thrashed and rolled over, taking some of his pride with her. He sat up, then almost wished he hadn't, stomach turning.

The greenhouse was beautiful, if you didn't count the giant hole in it. Steven had been transfixed by it, by the aching sense of relatability. At some point, somehow, Connie had come to sit with him. And there was a sleeping bag. And here they were.

"What a mess," he muttered, mushing up his hair.

Connie was a restless sleeper, moreso than he ever was, so when she didn't react to his words he looked at her, half-expecting her to be awake. She wasn't. Her features were pinched and her fingers dug into the fabric of the sleeping bag. He watched as it tore under her strong grip.

"Connie," Steven said, giving her a firm shake.

She jolted, giving him a kick for good measure. "Steven?" she whispered, wiping a hand across her face. "Fuck, what time is it?"

"I have... no idea. Are you okay?"

"Bad dreams." Connie shifted her legs under the covers. "Aqua and Topaz."

They seemed to be bothering her a lot, recently. "Why them?"

She shrugged. "I think it's because I couldn't really move? I can do so many things now, but I couldn't do anything when it mattered."

Steven gave her shoulder a comforting squeeze. "Hey, don't beat yourself up over it."

Connie snorted. "Look around, Universe. You're the least allowed out of the people we know to give me that advice."

The boy flinched, shifting his gaze to the hole again. The edges were jagged and pointy, but the overall shape was around his size. He imagined pushing through it, bloody and raw. What world would he walk into?

"I'm sorry," Connie said, sensing she'd made an error.

"S'okay."

"It's not, though. What're you thinking about?"

"Intrusive thoughts. I mean, that's not what I'm thinking about, but that's what they are." Steven recognized them well enough by now, having suffering from multiple reoccurring ones. "Connie, is something wrong with me?"

"No."

"Connie."

"What? I'm being serious. Considering half of what you've been through, you're remarkably functional."

"Oh." He squeezed the fabric over his stomach. "So I'm just... blowing things out of proportion?"

"You literally aren't." She gave his shoulder a solid punch. "This isn't black and white, you doofus. You've been through hella trauma- it's perfectly natural that that would affect your day-to-day life. You know what you need?"

"Oh, stars, don't say it."

"A therapist."

"Connie, that's literally my job. I'd be doing the opposite of my job if I got one of those."

"That's... not how anything works? Ever? In the history of working?" Connie's glare softened at the truly puzzled expression on Steven's face. She reluctantly leaned her cheek on his shoulder. "I know you aren't ready for that. I'm not forcing you. I mean, I'm being pushy about it, but I never want you to do something just for me, alright? Especially something like therapy. That's something you have to be comfortable with."

"What do you suggest, then?" He let out a bittersweet laugh. "My idea clearly didn't work."

Connie hesitated, drumming her fingers on his knee. "You could talk to a doctor."

He stared at her. "I'm not sick?"

"I meant about medicating."

"I'm not sick," he repeated. "There's nothing wrong with me."

"Steven, that's not what I'm saying. Sometimes, people's brains misfire. Sometimes they don't give out the right chemicals you need. Meds can, in some cases, help with that."

"Like... for depression?" She nodded. Steven hesitated. "But... what if they don't work with my Gem stuff? Or what if there's nothing wrong with my brain at all? What if it's just a waste of everyone's time?"

"Thinking like that is kind of why therapy and meds exist, Steven. You're allowed to not be okay- you know that, right?"

Steven bit his tongue. It really, really didn't feel that way to him, but he didn't want to start a fight, either. People always left after fights. "Will you... come with me?"

Connie smiled. Her eyes were wet. "Of course, Steven. You're not the only one who could use a talking to from a doctor."

And for now, that's enough.

Chapter Text

-Starboy added Wooloo to the chat!-

Starboy: Sorry this took so long
Starboy: I had a long weekend lol

Wooloo: hey is no biggie man
Wooloo: wassup my peeps
Wooloo: ngl I kind of read over sadies shoulder a lot
Wooloo: so I know most of yall

Cap'n: heeeeey
Cap'n: sorry we didn't get much chance to chat before space stuff

Connie: not to be rude but whomst

Wooloo: oh right I should introduce me
Wooloo: im shep! they/them please

Connie: OH okay Sadie's SO
Connie: Nice to meet you

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: Hey!

TheBitsTheBits: this chat is a disaster
TheBitsTheBits: swing by my fry truck sometime shep ill make you some for free
TheBitsTheBits: yknow for the exposure

Wooloo: niiiiiice

STEENSTEVEN: nice to meet you
STEENSTEVEN: but what IS that username

Wooloo: ?

STEENSTEVEN: fucking casual
STEENSTEVEN: real men stan mareep

Wooloo: im not a man my man
Wooloo: also this one was more meme appriorate than mareep

STEENSTEVEN: SHIT I'M SORRY
STEENSTEVEN: I was trying to be a pokemon snob and I ended up being a straight-up douchenugget

Cap'n: don't take him personal shep
Cap'n: I mean DO correct his dumb ass
Cap'n: but he's shit with names/pronouns overall

STEENSTEVEN: I resent that

Cap'n: you called me the Long L for four years

STEENSTEVEN: I said I resented it, not that I had evidence to the contrary

Wooloo: we all make mistakes
Wooloo: just dont be like. doing it on purpose?

Starboy: This chat respects pronouns and that's final
Starboy: Ya'll want info abt the next apocalypse ya'll better respect our nb friends

Yalldve: I was awoken by the sounds of Ronaldo stepping on his peen
Yalldve: listen wooloo might be cuter but we all can agree amphros is a much sicker evolution than dubwool

Cap'n: RESPECTFULLY disagree
Cap'n: It's a FLUFFY GOAT
Cap'n: Ampharos just got a shit shave job and a Christmas bulb on its ass

Yalldve: call me when dubwool gets a mega

Cap'n: ALL MEGA AMPHAROS HAS IS 80S HAIR AND MORE CHRISTMAS BULBS
Cap'n: Mega dubwool better have a sick ass rack of horns and that's final

Wooloo: bold of you to assume itll have a mega
Wooloo: i mean id love for it to have one but theres a lot more sicker pokemon this gen
Wooloo: dreadnaw, corviknight, coalossal

Yalldve: HATTERENE
Yalldve: she slow as fuck but she kicking ass

STEENSTEVEN: frosmoth
STEENSTEVEN: how the FUCK did we forget about frosmoth

Connie: I say this with all of the respect
Connie: but what the hell are you guys going on about

Starboy: Pokémon, I think?
Starboy: I have like a hundred hours on soulsilver
Starboy: And a LOT of mystery dungeon
Starboy: But idk about the new stuff

Connie: Ah

Cap'n: how the fuck did you not know it was pokemon?

Connie: Some of us were banned from watching/playing Pokémon as kids bc "it gave a false picture of what evolution is"
Connie: But go off I guess

TheBitsTheBits: Connie what the fuck

Connie: Big Ass Mood

Starboy: CONNIE COME OVER
Starboy: WERE GONNA SAVE THE TIME GEARS TOGETHER
Starboy: WITH THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP

Connie: That is an anime ass sentence
Connie: Do I get an anime ass sword

Starboy: No but you get a partner who you lowkey gay-marry and raise a baby jellyfish with
Starboy: I mean I guess if you really care abt that sort of thing you can pick a partner based on opposite gender instead of type advantage
Starboy: But my Skitty just wants to look fashionable and marry rich

Wooloo: bro don't you end up like...
Wooloo: living in a cliff

Starboy: I said he WANTED to marry rich
Starboy: I didn't say he was bright enough to do it effectively.

Connie: Alright sold
Connie: Lemme just pack a lunch real quick

Starboy: Ooooh bring apples!
Starboy: It's thematically appropriate!

2Cool4Skool: skiddo
2Cool4Skool: how did we all collectively forget skiddo

Starboy: f U C K

Chapter Text

Shep's kisses, like every other kiss ever, tasted like whatever they'd eaten last. Tonight it's cotton candy, and Sadie felt so bubbly as they pulled apart she couldn't help but wonder if the sugar was in her all along.

"Sleep good, baby," they whispered, bumping their foreheads together. "I'll call you in the morning, alright?"

Sadie giggled. "Dork."

She was loathe to let go of their hands, then to close the door behind them with a quiet click. Sadie craned her neck to see over the edge of the door, making absolutely sure that Shep got down the path and to their car before flicking the outside light off.

The floorboards creaked, startling her out of her reverie. Barb smiled and lightly patted her shoulder. "They seem like a good match."

"Yeah?"

"Of course, honey. You smile so much more." The mailwoman cocked her head to the side thoughtfully. "I'm just glad this one's got some meat on their bones. I was always scared I was gonna break the Barriga boy in half."

Sadie snorted and shucked off her coat. "We grabbed some Chinese while we were out. Then we went to Funland and got cotton candy."

"This late?"

"I know, right? We're rebels." She paused, awkwardly fiddling with her hands. "Sorry if I left you with a lot of leftovers."

Barb laughed and shook her head. "Nah, s'alright. Me and Grego gobbled 'em all down, and lemme tell you, it was not a pretty sight."

"Mr. Universe was here?"

"Still is, in fact. He's having a snooze on the couch."

Sadie craned her neck around the doorway to see the muted glare of the TV highlighting Greg's sleeping form. His head was tilted backwards, leaving his mouth wide open as he snored. A line of drool went through his beard. "Oh." She shoved her hands into her pockets. "How come he never takes you to his place?"

"He lives in his van, honey."

"I mean, he did, but he's rich now, isn't he? Shouldn't he at least have an apartment or something?"

"Try tellin' him that." Barb leaned on the wall. Sadie saw her smile turn softer as she watched him sleep. "He's a bit of a dummy, but he's good people."

Something in her chest twisted. "Good people don't constantly hang around other people's houses. He's a grown man! He shouldn't be sticking you with the bills."

Barb stared at her, surprised by the ferocity in her tone. "Sadie, I know this hasn't been easy, but Greg isn't like that. He's payin' bills, and for food, and he gets up and goes to work every day." She slapped her hip. "And it's been... nice. Having someone else around to cook and clean. You know how my knees are."

"I could do that," Sadie said.

"Aw, you're a grown lady, you gotta do grown lady things." Barb squeezed her shoulder. "You just focus on taking the next steps with you and your band-buddy. Have you picked out a name yet?"

She squirmed under the question. "No."

"I believe in you, sweetheart." She bent down and kissed her cheek. "I know, wherever you and Shep go next, it'll be great. Go get some sleep."

"Night, mom." Sadie balled her fists. "I love you."

Steven's contact photo was out of date. Sadie hadn't paid it much mind before now, since it was rare that she communicated with him via text message, but the bright smile and sparkling eyes looked ancient. He hadn't been hip-height for over a year now.

She clicked on it, finding a just-as-old message. It was covered in emojis and promises of help. Sadie thought that if messages had a smell, it'd reek of glitter. Swallowing the sense of whiplash, she started to type.

You lived with your dad once right

There was a noticeable pause.

Yes?

Where

?

Where did you live

His van. Steven seemed to hesitate before going on. Why do you ask?

He keeps sleeping over at my house. isn't he, like, super rich? why doesn't he have his own apartment or smth?

I don't think he's ever had one tbh. Idk the whole situation, but dad either got kicked out or left pretty young, and has lived in his van ever since. It's a unit of a vehicle for surviving all the waffle-irons it's taken over the years.

Sadie wasn't sure where to take the conversation. She'd wanted confirmation, she supposed, to stave off that shriveled up voice that kept looking for the cracks in some made-up façade, but now all she knew was that she was being ridiculous. I think my mom wants him to move in.

OK.

You text like an old man I stg. how am I supposed to take "ok."

It's "I'm being very pointedly neutral on this subject bc it's my dad and I want him to be happy" in emotionally-constipated-teen.

I think i'm jealous? its stupid but its true

Oh big mood, I've always wanted my dad to get a place so he could have, like, proper air conditioning and heating and stuff, but I always thought he'd just cave and live with me and my many murdered TVs.

til that steven universe has killed TVs.

Oh, man, I am, like, DESTINED to kill all TVs I come near. I've killed at least five.

Sadie covered a snicker with the palm of her hand. You criminal!

Ngl I'm kind of an anxious mess rn and this is helping a lot, can we keep texting for, like, an hour?

whats up?

Nothing crazy, I'm just worried about side-effects. I just took my first dose of happy pills and I'm stressing over potential side-effects that prlly won't happen.

Oh shit. Her fingers hovered above the keys. Sadie got a sneaking suspicion he'd brought it up to keep her mind off of what was going on in her living room, but it was still a very real thing. Sure, man, I won't go anywhere. Wanna hear some first draft names Shep and I are working on?

Heck yeah

Chapter Text

Starboy: All I'm saying is that I'm happy Lion likes you and you like Lion but he's my gotdang cat and I'd really like to see him sometimes, that's all.
Starboy: Wait wrong chat.

Yalldve: RIP

STEENSTEVEN: press f to pay respects

Connie: I will not press any such button
Connie: Not while my boyfriend is trying to make me move an actual lion

Yalldve: things are heating up in the space warrior fandom I see

Starboy: Hey ya'll're sensible people, maybe you can help

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: "Sensible"
Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: Define sensible

Starboy: I mean only one of you is a space-faring pirate so ur doing better than my family
Starboy: Lars I see your active symbol, stop lurking

Cap'n: I HAVE BEEN SUMMONED
Cap'n: we hit a rlly boring asteroid belt so it's slow-going
Cap'n: hit me with that earth drama

Connie: It's not drama
Connie: It's a very basic, sensible fact that trying to force a lion to do anything is grounds to get eaten by a lion.

Starboy: I SAW YOU SQUIRT HIM WITH A SPRAY BOTTLE YESTERDAY

Connie: HE WAS CHEWING ON MY SOCKS

Starboy: I don't wanna pull the Owner Card but like
Starboy: Did Steven Universe trudge through a desert and almost die of heat sickness to see his cat once a month?
Starboy: No no he did not

Connie: You literally warped there

Starboy: IT FELT LIKE MILES

Yalldve: did
Yalldve: did steven just get ok boomered by his gf

Cap'n: #OkPTSDer

Yalldve: meh
Yalldve: I'd give it a two outta ten

Connie: If YOU get the giant ass ship with thick legs then I get the magical pink lion
Connie: Take it or leave it

Starboy: I WILL REPORT YOU
Starboy: FOR THEFT
Starboy: OF BASIC LION RIGHTS

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: so like
Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: why not do that thing where you put the pet in the middle
Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: and pspspspspspps that boi until he picks a side

Starboy: I'm not legally obligated to answer that

Connie: Bc he loses
Connie: Every time

Starboy: YOU SMELL LIKE ALL THE DELISH FOOD UR MOM MAKES
Starboy: AND THOSE DUMPLINGS YOU MAKE HIM
Starboy: AND IT'S NOT FAIR

Connie: Momos, Steven
Connie: Momos
Connie: Call me when you stop fooling with those cheap ass lion lickers

Starboy: I WANT A DIVORCE

Connie: I MEAN IF YOU WANNA PLAY YOU CAN PLAY
Connie: BUT LION IS OLD ENOUGH TO MAKE HIS OWN DECISIONS IN COURT
Connie: AND IS HE GONNA CHOOSE MOMOS OR SHITTY ICE CREAM SANDWICHES

Starboy: I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME

Connie: MY CAT NOW BITCH

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: This escalated quickly.

Chapter Text

"Oh, sure, you can bitch and moan about astronaut food being shit all day, but I mention one time that veggie bacon isn't nearly as tasty and suddenly you're a connoisseur of powders?"

Connie barely surprised a fit of laughter as she closed the newly-built garden room door behind her. "I'm going to assume I'm not busting into anything important." She tossed her math bucks on the table and sat down beside Steven's legs, which were poking out from under the transmitter near the warp pad.

Steven tilted the phone's microphone away from his mouth. "Lars being Lars," he reported, then went back to it. "I don't care how much artificial stuff is in it, there's absolutely no way space meat is any more vegetarian than regular meat, and you can quote me on that regardless of accuracy."

Connie grabbed one holographic screen from the table and started paging through it. Half the functions were down from fiddling. "Jesus, Steven, did you tear out the interface?"

"I have no idea," Steven admitted. "No, I'm not talking to you. Connie is here. Connie has told me that if I ever refer to making out as 'canoodling' then she will canoodle my ass into the ocean, so no. Yes, I'm whipped. It's great. Call me when you and Emerald finally get around to making safe words." Steven abruptly hit end call, tucking his phone into his jacket. "Connie. Solar flare. Lava to my volcano."

"You have no idea what you did, do you?"

"Absolutely no idea."

Connie snorted. "The human has to fix the alien tech once again, does she?"

"Peridot will make fun of how bad my tech is. You won't make fun of my tech, will you?"

"No, just you."

Steven awkwardly shuffled his butt out from under the system. "I can handle that."

"You cuss a lot more with Lars," Connie noted, taking his place with the little screen. "It's weird."

"Bad weird?"

"Just weird. Remember when you said fuck and tried to turn yourself in to the police?"

"Yeah," he said with a laugh. "I dunno. I guess I've just felt more... energetic lately? I still get tired easily, but I also wanna get up and do things."

"Like tearing up your intercom?"

"I was trying to secure a more stable line to Homeworld, actually. Lars was moving planetary satellites to make it clearer. Now it's just a matter of connecting things." Steven rubbed his chin. "I've been thinking, and I feel like the palace is being underutilized right now. I mean, we could broadcast all sorts of stuff from there!"

Connie twisted a glowing wire in a different direction. It pulsed like a living organ. "Like cartoons?"

"Well, yeah, but stuff like laws and ideas. Homeworld still has a lot to learn about being free, you know? We could broadcast classes with Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl, and PSAs, and even concepts for laws to vote on. The Diamonds aren't in charge anymore, but their words still hold a lot of weight in the galaxy, and I feel like we've left a lot of Gems listless."

She paused, inching out from under the com. Steven seemed surprised as she took his hands. "Steven, are you... helping? Because you want to?"

"Well, yeah, I guess? It's kind of my job, but..." Steven hummed to himself. "I want to do it, too. Like. A lot."

Connie squeezed his fingers and said nothing.

"I think... well, I've been doing a lot of thinking, and I hate not having stuff to do. I want to be busy. I want to learn, and grow. I want to feel like a whole person again." He sheepishly took one hand away to wipe his eyes, which had begun to get a smidge bit wet. "I haven't felt like this in... gosh, it's been years. The meds have been doing more than I thought they would, honestly. And maybe... maybe therapy? Eventually? I'm still not ready, but... I know I could be."

A thin hand took his wrist, and before Steven knew it Connie was pulling him forward, pressing a heavy kiss to his lips. Steven stiffened, then loosened, pulling her closer. When they drifted apart, they kept their foreheads against each other.

"This," said Connie, "Is the Steven Universe I fell in love with. Stars, I missed him."

Chapter Text

Starboy: so I've been pretty absent lately

LookingForward: We noticed
LookingForward: Also I have a random missed call from you?
LookingForward: But when I texted u abt it u never answered
LookingForward: You sounded rlly bad in the voicemail

Starboy: I'd really not talk about it
Starboy: I'm doing better now
Starboy: Comparably

Connie: oh u sent her a message but no me?

Starboy: Connie you know that's different
Starboy: I was panicking and I knew dad was at her house
Starboy: It wasn't that big of a deal

Connie: YOU WERE MISSING
Connie: FOR THREE FUCKING DAYS

Cap'n: I leave Earth for epic space adventures and Steven goes AWOL!?

Starboy: I went CAMPING thank you very much
Starboy: It was an intense journey of self-discovery.
Starboy: During which I realized I'm kind of meh
Starboy: Like I've walked the same walk for so long and all its gotten me is a dad bod and self-esteem issues

Connie: it's a cute dad bod

Starboy: Appreciated but not the point
Starboy: I wanna do better by myself
Starboy: I wanna feel better about doing better by myself
Starboy: Which is my long-winded way of asking if smashing your head into a control panel at light speed will crack it

TheBitsTheBits: I'm sorry whomst

Starboy: It's a very serious question with a straightforward answer

Yalldve: its both of those but its also batshit insane steven

Starboy: Ok look
Starboy: It's recently come to my attention that I should probably be dead
Starboy: So I'm trying to parcel out what kind of wounds did what to my bones

glowstix: what happened to ur bones bro

Starboy: That's literally what I'm trying to find out sour cream

Cap'n: I'm not boneologist or anything
Cap'n: Nor am I schooled in the ways of physics
Cap'n: But I feel like it's safe to assume that would make a head pop like a balloon, yes

Starboy: Ok sick
Starboy: What about a drop

Yalldve: how big we talkin
Yalldve: like off a table or off a plane

Starboy: I don't have exact measurements but plane is a good bet

Yalldve: u dead son

Starboy: Ok but what would that break

Cap'n: I mean what did you fall on

Starboy: Connie?

Connie: Yes.
Connie: You fell on your Yes.

Cap'n: I'm no doctor but I'm going to assume all the things

Yalldve: smh not a doctor not a physics person not a boneologist
Yalldve: get yo ass back to school lars

Cap'n: I have a very specific set of skills okay

Starboy: Holy shit
Starboy: I never noticed before today but humans are absolute weaksauce
Starboy: You couldn't pay someone to main a human

Cap'n: you could pay many people to maim a human

Starboy: main lars
Starboy: I was making a overwatch joke

Cap'n: jfc that's even worse

Connie: Steven how could you shame me like this
Connie: In front of all our peers

Starboy: IT'S A FUN GAME

Connie: IT'S AN OUTDATED MEME
Connie: THE GEMS PROBABLY SAW THIS MEME IN THE 1800S

Starboy: DON'T BE SO BROKEN UP ABOUT IT

Connie: STEVEN I WILL SMASH YOUR SKULL MYSELF

Starboy: GO AHEAD UR NOT EVEN THE FIRST CUTE GIRL TO DO IT

Chapter Text

TheBitsTheBits: so um
TheBitsTheBits: -Alaskanbullworm dot png-
TheBitsTheBits: what the FUCK

Cap'n: HOLY SHIT THAT THING'S HUGE
Cap'n: WHY ARE YOU STILL IN TOWN

TheBitsTheBits: no evacuation call yet

Yalldve: gunga says she hasn't received any calls from the gems
Yalldve: holy shit the shriek on that thing

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: It doesn't seem to be getting closer to town

Cap'n: do i need to turn this ship around
Cap'n: bc i can turn this ship around and be back in like six hours

TheBitsTheBits: nah don't worry this big face ship just dropped in
TheBitsTheBits: the big ladies got this

Yalldve: @starboy whats going on
Yalldve: gunga is worried abt yall u usually call

Yalldve: @Connie?

Yalldve: anybody?

Yalldve: sadie are you on

LookingForward: yeah
LookingForward: i'm not in town so I didn't feel comfortable breaking in

Yalldve: can you get ahold of Steven or Connie for me?

LookingForward: I can try
LookingForward: Gimme a few

"Hmm?" Shep murmured into the curve of her neck. Their hotel room was dimly lit but surprisingly comfortable, with a bed big enough for both of them to cuddle. They squinted against the phone light. "What's happening, daffodil?"

"There's a corruption in town and no one can get ahold of Steven." Sadie quickly went to her contacts, pulling up Steven's. She'd replaced the old photo with a newer one- jacket, hands in pockets, an awkward half-smile. It'd been taken right before the concert. "I'm gonna call him."

Shep settled their chin into her shoulder, holding their neck at an angle to avoid digging in too much. "I thought you said corruptions didn't go to town?"

Sadie hit answer call and put the phone to her ear. "I mean- not really? Sometimes they did. Usually they stayed on the beach. Steven said something about them being attracted to other Gems."

"Then how come it's by the town? Wouldn't it be heading for Little Homeworld?"

"I dunno. Probably." Sadie's fingers tapped nervously on her knee.

After a final ring the phone turned to voicemail. "Uh, hey, this is Steven Universe. Leave me a message and I'll call back as soon as the world isn't on fire. And if this is about the windows, just know I'm very sorry and will pay in full as soon as I can."

Sadie hit end call. She didn't doubt that Jenny had left a few messages as it was. She went into their text messages, scanning the last conversation they'd had.

I'm really sorry about the concert. That was pretty messed up of me. I made you spill your personal dilemas in front of everyone and then I almost squished you for it. It was really uncool of me. I'm really sorry.

She'd struggled to reply honestly to him, crafting up at least four draft messages before finally settling on; I know you didn't mean it, and I realize you're sorry. But this isn't like that time we almost fused. This felt personal. And I don't think I can let it go quite yet.

Ok.

Is it okay? She'd replied. Are you okay?

Steven never got back to her.

Sadie hesitated to click on Connie's number. She didn't even remember when she got it, honestly. Probably when Beach City finally started making contact systems between the Gems and humans to know when and how to get out of the way. It rang two times before ending. Sadie tried again, only to find herself unable to get through.

"I think she turned her phone off," she muttered, staring at the old Sadie Killer background she had as her wallpaper. Sadie couldn't quite explain the pit that had become her stomach. She couldn't say with great accuracy that Connie kept her phone on all the time, but it felt damn near close to it. The girl was always stacked up with potential callbacks- colleges and sports and band, alongside the work she did with the Gems. This felt strange. This felt... wrong.

LookingForward: i can't get ahold of anyone
LookingForward: any luck on your end?

TheBitsTheBits: i think things have settled down
TheBitsTheBits: the screaming is gone anyway

STEENSTEVEN: okay but you all felt that earthquake right?
STEENSTEVEN: thats never happened with corruptions before has it?

Yalldve: we've never seen a corruption that BIG before
Yalldve: at least that's what gunga said
Yalldve: she went off to the house to talk to the gems

glowstix: is that safe?

Yalldve: bold of you to assume gunga cares

Cap'n: so they got it?

TheBitsTheBits: idk
TheBitsTheBits: i didnt hear any big explosion noises
TheBitsTheBits: but it stopped screaming and slamming its head into things

Cap'n: wtf
Cap'n: since when do corruptions self-harm

TheBitsTheBits: man i dunno
TheBitsTheBits: im just the closest kid to the beach who dgaf if they get squished
TheBitsTheBits: i think it went into the ocean bc waves are rough af

STEENSTEVEN: guys im having a big brain moment
STEENSTEVEN: what if that worm was one of the big ladies

Cap'n: ronaldo not the time

STEENSTEVEN: no i'm serious bro
STEENSTEVEN: biggest one we've ever seen
STEENSTEVEN: doesn't act like other corruptions
STEENSTEVEN: other big ladies came by for it

LookingForward: I don't think that's possible
LookingForward: I mean the only pink diamond is dead

2Cool4Skool: i mean is she tho
2Cool4Skool: steven has her gem

TheBitsTheBits: bro we just had a talk about mommy issues like a month ago

2Cool4Skool: i'm not being poetic or some shit
2Cool4Skool: there's a giant pink monster on the beach
2Cool4Skool: and we never saw the big corruption coming

Cap'n: shit

"This is some stupid shit, Ronnie."

"Yeah, yeah." Ronaldo rolled his eyes, waving his brother onwards. "How else are we gonna see what happened? It's not like Beach City has a news station."

Peedee made a reluctant grunt of recognition, shoving his hands into his oversized cargo pant pockets. "We should really get one of those."

The whirling of engines was almost deafening as they edged closer to the cutoff between the beach and the Crystal Gems temple. A fine layer of dust was in the air, having been kicked up by falling rocks. Ronaldo paused to video the claw marks in the side of the hill a bit more closely, whistling under his breath. "I'm totally gonna get some subscribers off of this."

Peedee grabbed Ronaldo's shirt, yanking him towards the beach. "Dude, record this."

Ronaldo turned his camera around in time to see a blur of neon colors twisting through the sky. This was nothing overtly new- the Diamonds came by from time to time, and Beach City had become accustomed to the ship's strange way of flying. The temple was much more distressing- chunks of the stone lady were ripped and cracked, scattered around like shrapnel. The house itself had a gaping hole in the front, as if something truly monstrous had attempted to flee but had gotten stuck halfway out the door.

Worse yet was the ocean. Jagged stones peered out above the waves, cresting into craters and ridges. A rainbow Gem was collecting the scraps of wood below, throwing them to a Gem with wings, who kept them in a bowl of water. Ronaldo zoomed in on the temple in time to see a flicker of activity inside. Connie came outside while riding Lion, scowling fiercely. The creature roared and she was gone.

"We gotta get closer," Ronaldo decided.

"Um," said Peedee, seeing the rapidly descending shadow. "How about we not?"

In the time it took the eldest brother to blink, Garnet had leapt from wherever she was perched to stand stiffly in front of them, arms crossed. Ronaldo yelped and took a few steps back, almost falling ass over kettle in the sand.

"S'not safe here," Garnet said. "You need to stay back."

Peedee let out an awkward, high-strung laugh, attempting to yank the larger boy away by his shoulder. "Oh, h-hey there, square boss lady. We're really sorry to intrude-"

"THE PEOPLE WANT ANSWERS!" Ronaldo bellowed, sticking his finger out. "What happened here? Why did the Earth break? Where did the giant monster come from? Are we safe? Can we see-"

Garnet put her hand over the camera. It was more of a shock that she didn't crush the phone entirely. "This is Crystal Gem property. Humans shouldn't be here right now."

"But we just saw Conn-"

"Connie is the exception. You are not."

"Again, really sorry," Peedee stressed. He shoved his way in front of Ronaldo, making him back away with a grumble. "Uh, listen. The town's really worried. I know you prefer your privacy, but usually Steven-"

"Steven-" Garnet started, then paused, shoulders falling. Her hands had curled into fists. "Steven is fine. We are fine. The town is safe. Please, leave us to our own."

"Yup. Yup. Will do." Peedee grabbed Ronaldo's shoulder and began the process of dragging him away. "C'mon, Ronnie. Let's not piss off the magic rock ladies."

"But our answers," Ronaldo whined, though he turned and began to walk with him. "Fine. But I'm posting this."

"If you wanna embarrass yourself that badly, be my guest."

STEENSTEVEN: SO
STEENSTEVEN: Link

glowstix: wow

STEENSTEVEN: I KNOW RIGHT

glowstix: u had ur thumb over the camera for most of the video

STEENSTEVEN: I WANTED A SOLID GRIP
STEENSTEVEN: ESPECIALLY SINCE I'VE HEARD THE SQUARE ONE EATS PHONES

Yalldve: chillit with the caps man
Yalldve: but yeah
Yalldve: shes tole my dads phone out of his car one time

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: oh that was funny, she nyoomed into the car and just dabbed out
Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: she's kind of intense

Wooloo: I don't think I'll ever say this enough but
Wooloo: what is WITH this town and no personal boundaries

Cap'n: Gems don't really work like humans
Cap'n: Well like the stock image of a neurotypical white human anyway
Cap'n: From what I hear the gems were kind of sequestered for forever before finally getting more social
Cap'n: So they have no idea how tf to talk to or interact with anyone they haven't known since before toast was invented

Wooloo: I imagine the war thing didn't exactly help matters

Cap'n: oh yeah no
Cap'n: I talked to some gems when I was at the cosmic jubilee that one time and can confirm
Cap'n: the gems are weird even for gems

TheBitsTheBits: so we've dianogsed the local aliens with PTSD
TheBitsTheBits: great job everyone
TheBitsTheBits: now what

Yalldve: now we wait for gunga I guess

glowstix: I'm worried about them man

Yalldve: mood

Mayor Nanafua: We have received official notice from the Crystal Gems that the corruption that attacked the town is safely contained and corralled. Though their home and the hill has received some damage, it's mostly cosmetic. There was a breech of the Earth's crust in part due to the corruption landing in the ocean, as well as interference from an entity known as the cluster. There were no dangerous injuries. That is all.
Mayor Nanafua: You may now return to your usual mismanagement of this alert channel for memes

STEENSTEVEN: okay but WHAT DOES ANY OF THAT MEAN
STEENSTEVEN: Mayor Pizza?
STEENSTEVEN: hello?

Over the following days, Sadie slept very little. As much as she wanted to go back to Beach City, it didn't seem like it was her place. Shep had taken great care in talking it over with her, offering the options. But all returning would do was put undue stress on her mother, who already had Greg- and Sadie had heard enough about Greg to know her hands were full.

So, when her phone rings at three in the morning, Sadie is very much awake, very much outside her hotel room, and very much quick to hit answer. "Connie?"

Connie's end of the line is windy. If she had to guess, she was sitting on the porch. Or maybe the roof. Sadie didn't think there was much porch left. "Do you know how many calls I've gotten from you?" she asked. "The answer is thirty-four."

"What happened? Are you okay? What is the Cluster? Is Steven-"

"One at a time," she replied. "A big honking lizard attacked the beach. I'm fine. The Cluster is a ball of Gem experiments in the mantle. Steven is-" her breath hitched a little. Connie cleared her throat. "Steven is resting. He's had it pretty rough lately."

Sadie swallowed, fingers tightening around the phone. "It was him, wasn't it?"

"Bold of you to assume that. Especially since you didn't come back to town."

"Don't guilt trip me, Maheswaran. There's nothing I could have done." Sadie tried to make herself believe that, at least. "I mean, would you have let me in the door if I just strolled up after a giant monster attack?"

"Not much of a door left, actually."

"You're avoiding the topic."

"Technically, I'm derailing."

"Did you really call me just to be a pain in the neck?"

"What did you expect? Answers?" Connie snorted derisively. "There's nothing I can say, Sadie. The Gems failed him. I failed him. I thought I was helping him, being a good friend, and all I did was shove him under like everybody else. That's it. That's the story."

"You don't believe that."

She scoffed but didn't argue. "I thought I was keeping his secrets, you know? I never told anyone about- I never told anyone. I thought that nudging him towards meds might help him start healing- when all it did was make him feel like I didn't love him without them. He ran off for three days and all I could do was sit and wait. What was the point of learning to fight and starve and hate if I can't even hug him right?"

Sadie swallowed heavily. She didn't think she'd ever heard the desperate hysteria in Connie's voice before. "Connie, listen to me. You need to breathe."

Connie laughs, but it sounds more like a sob. She sunk to the roof like a doll that's lost its strings. "I think I might need therapy," she eked out. "Mr. Universe is looking for a good fit for Steven; and now me, I guess. I think he's finally realizing how fucked up it is to send kids into battle."

"So," said Sadie, trying to grasp some sort of lucidity out of what was clearly a personal meltdown. "It was Steven, then." Connie didn't reply. Sadie got the feeling she wasn't going to get a solid answer from anyone but him. "Why did you call me? I mean, I'm so far away."

"I dunno," she admitted. "Maybe because you are so far away? It makes it easier to yell at you. Which is- really messed up of me. I'm sorry."

And it's not okay, so Sadie doesn't say it is, but it's hard. It's so hard. "I'm not your enemy, Connie."

"No one is," Connie choked. "That's the problem."

-Starboy changed their name to Alaskanbullworm-

Alaskanbullworm: So.

STEENSTEVEN: I FUCKING CALLED IT

Chapter Text

Alaskanbullworm: wow actually thats a lot longer than id thought it be

-Alaskanbullworm changed their name to ABW-

ABW: anyway

Cap'n: bro what happened? Are you okay?

ABW: i am. Very tired.
ABW: i've been talking with a therapist and a doctor and they both agree that i don't get the proper amount of hours
ABW: also I probably have depression anxiety and CPTSD, so thats fun

Connie: twinsies

ABW: aint that just like us lol
ABW: sp yeah sorry in advance bc this is gonna be really low energy, but I hate leaving ppl in the dark
ABW: monster? Me. Issues? Have. Sorry? Very.

Yalldve: what the hell was all that, steven???

Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: yeah
Pizzadreamsaremadeofthis: normally I respect ur privacy but a giant Godzilla showed up and fought a hand and I am NOT okay without at least getting basic confirmation on your health

ABW: hoo boy alright
ABW: basic answer is no
ABW: complex answer is hell no

ABW: the jidst is that i've been downspiraling for a long time and I hit my limit
ABW: and, well, Diamond powers are OP af even when they're going against you
ABW: but after some hugs and kisses i've stabilized enough to retain my form again and confront my issues

Wooloo: and yoour alien moms never noticed? You're a kid, bro, not a method actor

ABW: i mean youre a bit wrong on the second part but
ABW: mental health isn't a thing with Gems
ABW: Wait no lemme rephrase
ABW: mental health isn't prioritized among Gems
ABW: the worth of gems is always applied tp their usefulness, not their mental stability, so everyone just kind of ignored problematic behavior in exchange for good work

Connie: which is. Very fucked

ABW: very ducked indeed
ABW: especially since we're quickly learning that mental health issues ARE a thing Gems face. They don't age or get sick but they can get traumatized and hurt
ABW: amethyst actually made waves on homeworld bc shes a defective quartz AND the first gem to ever be diagnosed with clinical depression
ABW: and while all my weird aunts have issues for days i'm the first to have a label slapped on it.
ABW: you'd think the attempted child murder would have helped them realize that sooner

STEENSTEVEN: the WHAT

Connie: Diamonds didn't realize that maybe shoving human chikdren into rooms with no food or water for earth days is actually Not A Good Punishment until like a year ago
Connie: and like, logically, it's not smth they'd know
Connie: but also fuck them for that

ABW: I meant the other time

Connie: oh.

STEENSTEVEN: the fucking WHAT

ABW: i've been shopping for a therapist, and the one thing all of them seem to agree on is that I need to be more open about things
ABW: so here I go i guess
ABW: i got my gem ripped out

Yalldve: YOU WHAT
Yalldve: YO WHO HURT YOU
Yalldve: ILL KICK THEIR ASS BOO

Cap'n: Isn't? That???? Your life source?????????

STEENSTEVEN: It's WHAT

ABW: yes and no
ABW: yes being I will absolutely die without it
ABW: no that it's as simple as a life source
ABW: think of it like, say, your organ system
ABW: sure, you'd die from blood loss without it, but there's a lot you also just. Won't be able to do even if you didn't. Eat. Breathe. Etc.

LookingForward: Jesus christ, Steven
LookingForward: I'm so sorry you went through that

ABW: it's fine.
ABW: i don't really remember a lot of it.
ABW: and neither do the Gems, actually

Connie: They were kind of possessed

STEENSTEVEN: They were WHAT

ABW: look, it's a long story
ABW: but there you go
ABW: my big bad secret

Cap'n: that's terrible man
Cap'n: I know the answer is obvious but are you.. okay??
Cap'n: like is there anything we can do to make this more comfortable for you?

ABW: nothing comes to mind, but i'll let you know if that changes
ABW: i think ive spent so long being a rock ive just kinda... eroded.

Connie: That's just how it was for us as kids, I think
Connie: You were the shield, I was the sword
Connie: It's what was expected of us

Yalldve: Steven, this comes from a place of love, but...
Yalldve: This feels less like you wanting to talk to us
Yalldve: And more you hurting yourself via talking to us

TheBitsTheBits: oh shit Jenny brought out the capitals
TheBitsTheBits: but yeah don't talk if you don't want to

ABW: but when has what I wanted ever mattered?
ABW: i tried not to talk, and i risked attacking the whole town
ABW: youre all grown-ups with grown-up lives and i legit can't even be bothered to tell my moms ive been diagnosed

Connie: Steven, we talked about this.

ABW: dont start, you havent even told your mom about the food thing

Connie: You have to talk to someone about this
Connie: Hey fuck you
Connie: Not all of us got to have weird sleep adventures in that stupid tower
Connie: Some of us had to sit for hours with their friend's body and wonder if they were gonna starve to death

ABW: Some of us had their internal systems ripped out in front of them

Connie: You think I can forget?
Connie: You think I'll ever forget the sound you made when you hit the floor?

Cap'n: Guys, don't do this
Cap'n: You've both been through a lot of shit. This isn't a contest.

ABW: Sure, but some of us can just go back to living a normal life after
ABW: School, friends, a future
ABW: The stuff I dreamed about

Connie: I'm not gonna apologize for living the life I swore to give up now that no one needs it

ABW: That's not the point
ABW: Are you even a little happy?

Connie: low blow and you know it, Universe
Connie: Are you?

ABW: Fuck off, Connie.

Connie: Why should I have to do it when you've been doing it our whole lives?

Yalldve: HEY HOW BOUT YA'LL STOP BEING DICKS AND TAKE A SECOND
Yalldve: Jesus Christ is it really so hard for you to talk about trauma without insulting each other

ABW: have you met the gems?
ABW: the fact this isn't a physical brawl IS an improvement.

Connie: I'm not doing all this stuff because I like to
Connie: I'm doing it because I have to
Connie: I'm fucked up inside.
Connie: I've accepted that
Connie: but I can only break so many little boy's arms bc they bumped me before I'm fucking up others too

ABW: exposure therapy with knives is kinda messed up, Connie

Connie: We had this exact same discussion about the Diamonds

ABW: Shut. Your fuck. Please.
ABW: and, for what it's worth, I'm sorry
ABW: I think I was born fucked up
ABW: and soemtiems I think it infects people
ABW: you, our parents, etc

Connie: I'm not "infected", Steven
Connie: And even if it was that simple, I infected myself
Connie: Maybe... we could do some counseling together?

ABW: ...that's a thing?

Connie: yeah
Connie: We can go in together and work on better communication
Connie: Bc as it is neither of us are that great at it
Connie: You tend tu push that shit down until like five years down the line
Connie: And I tend to get offensive and closed off.

ABW: Yeah, fair

LookingForward: I just wanna add that if you either of you wanna talk but not to a therapist, i'm here
LookingForward: I've been pretty quiet on here bc I couldn't do anything
LookingForward: But I'm here now

ABW: Sadie, you dont have to do that

LookingForward: Steven, we're family
LookingForward: Even if we're still learning how to act like it
LookingForward: I wanna be part of this stuff
LookingForward: If you're comfortable with that, I mean

ABW: Just. don't take sword lessons from pearl for me, please.

LookingForward: What?

Connie: Inside joke.

Two days later, Sadie opened her hotel room to find Steven Universe on her doorstep.

The boy looked absolutely terrible. Bags deeper than the Grand Canyon were at home at his face, edged with early crow's feet. His poofy hair was greasy from a lack of shower. The smell on his clothes told Sadie he'd likely not changed them recently, either. His hands, balled into fists, were hid inside his jacket pockets.

"Can I come in?" he asked, with an awkward half-smile that was surely not real.

"How did you find out where I was?" Sadie asked, surprised but not upset.

Steven shrugged. "Your mom told me. She thinks I need more human connections right now." He sighed through his nose and slumped. "That's... a lie. I think I need more human connections right now." Steven's eyes flickered up to hers. They were pink. "I... understand if this is too much, too soon."

"You needed to get away?"

"Yeah."

Sadie stepped back, holding the door open. "Come on in. We'll talk over breakfast, alright?"

The smile on his face morphed into something more genuine, but somehow equally as brittle. "You're the best, Sadie."

"Anything for family," she promised.