Chapter Text
After a couple of weeks of engaging in the family business I was now a part of, I realized that I needed a break. I didn't tell my beloved Sammy Winchester that I was getting tired of saving people, hunting things, taking part in the family business, though.
I knew that if I did, he would be upset, and I can't have him be upset, because then that would make me upset, and I can't be upset when drinking my usual grande non-fat sugar free skim milk caramel iced latte without any whipped cream, because it would upset my poor angelic tummy.
So I told dear young Sammy, my non assbutt, that I could sense through the angel radio that something was amiss. And I was being totally honest. There was trouble brewing up in the skies above the clouds and sun and outer space and all of the Starbucks that sell my usual grande non-fat sugar free skim milk caramel iced latte without any whipped cream.
The issue, my little peoples of the Earth, was that Heavenbucks was out of grande cups! Now, when I would visit Heaven, and stop by at the Heavenbucks, I would have to order two tall versions of my usual grande non-fat sugar free skim milk caramel iced latte without any whipped cream. Such a hassle!
That wouldn't do, so I decided to take matters into my own hands. You see, we don't have such a thing like recycling in Heaven. We just send all of our waste downstairs! No, not to Earth. That's the lobby of this universe. We send it to the basement. To Crowley's bedroom.
"Mwahaha!" That was my evil laugh just now.
Heh.
It's more evil in person.
It's one of those....what does Dean call it? One of those 'you had to be there' moments. Like all of his jokes that aren't funny about a certain situation.
Anyway, now, onto how I shall save Heaven and its issue with the missing grande sized cups. What I will do is walk into Starbucks, demand to get some cups, and then walk out of there. Hopefully, this time, my plan will work better than it did when I asked the strange man to hang up the phone from the payphone after I got my grace taken away. Those were strange times.
First off, I plan to take a trip to Heaven to see if they do indeed need help with the issue at hand. I must say, it would be quite embarrassing to show up with cups and see that they don't need any.
And so I go.
And I arrive.
And I walk over to the local Heavenbucks on my path.
And I walk inside. I make sure to see the sticker on the door to know whether to 'pull' or 'push' the door open.
I mess up anyway.
It was awkward.
But angels have no shame, so I raised up my chin and walked in proudly.
"Excuse me, dear brothers and sisters." I say and stride up to the counter. "How many grande cups do you currently have?" I ask, nonchalantly leaning on the counter. I imitate the move I've seen Sammy do when he speaks to me. I give whoever's back is to me at the counter 'the look'.
The red shirted man turns around. "S-samdriel," I stutter. I am very surprised to see is out of place! "What are you doing here? What happened to working at the Wiener Hut? That place was life!"
He shrugs. "That wasn't my thing. I found out I prefer a nice grande cup of non-fat sugar free skim milk caramel iced latte without any whipped cream."
I stare at him in awe. "Marry me." I order.
So we got married.
I now had a husband and a boyfriend.
Life is good.
And to this day, I sit by the fire place, sipping my usual grande non-fat sugar free skim milk caramel iced latte without any whipped cream with Samandriel while Sammy Winchester drinks wine out of the wine glass I got him so he wouldn't cry at the wedding.