Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

(8:05)-we r doing punnett squares dude. im dying.

(8:06)-they r /struggling/ with punnett squares. fml

(8:06)-oh my fuckign go d this is the worst

(8:07)-save me

(8:08)-im so ang r y

(8:12)-I do not know who you are, and you must have the wrong number, but I assume you're in school. 

(8:14)-I also assume that you are at least marginally inteligent, given your scorn at others not being able to correctly utilize a Punnett square.

(8:15) -Which, I agree, sounds dreadful.

(8:16)-However, it is school hours, and I would ask you to refrain from texting me at all, but especially in the hours from 8 to 3.

(8:17)-man, idc who the hell u r, i need moral support here, man!  this is awful. they r fucking up everything. the article the teacher gave us was frm wikipedia. sos. urgent help needed. 

(8:18)-public school is gonna kill me omg

(8:19)-sudden segway to 

(8:19)-oh my god

(8:19)-theyre doing it

(8:19)-ooooooooooooohmygoooooooooooooooood they r gonna do it im gonna rip his throat o u t

(8:19)-theyre doign the thing holy fuck

(8:19)-MY BIOLOGY TEACHER IS TALKING ABOUT CREATIONISM HERE WE ARE

(8:19)-FUCK EVERYTHIG IN MY LIFE 

(8:20)-IM GOING TO CRY OH YM GO D WHY WOULD YOU DO TH I S NOOOOOOOO

(8:30)(- im in in-school suspension. i started yelling.

(8:30)- i may have also flipped a desk.

(8:30)- first day of school, bruh. how's yours going?

(8:40)- I turned my phone on after class and I find 13 messages from you. 

(8:41)- I don't even know who you are, and I'm already positive that you will never stop texting me.

(8:41)- And you are already suspended. Wonderful. 

(8:41)- yeah well w/e man he deserved it

(8:43)-I suppose. Although I can't say I approve of the desk-throwing (or your terrible text-speak, honestly, just because we're teenagers doesn't mean we have to act like ridiculously stereotypical ones). Why would creationism be allowed at your school?

(8:44)- i dont fuckin know man its terrifying. 

(8:44) also terrifying: ur old-man texting. also i think me. i was terrifying. i was a ball of scientific rage and i almost hit this cool-looking girl in the head with my desk. she had wicked hair man and she had combat boots but i might have ruined what could have been a totally baller, rock&roll friendship via desk-hauling. way to make a great first impression at high school, self. a+.

(8:45)-how r things at ur school?

(8:46)- I cannot believe that anyone would actually throw a desk. 

(8:46)-i did.

(8:46)-My school is lacking in Creationism, but also, shamefully, in Higher Mathematics. It is decent, as schools go, I suppose. I'm a Freshman as well.

(8:47)- I must turn my phone off now. Class will start any second.

(8:47) duuuude dont leave me no one else is here cmon man

(8:48)-im so fuckin bored rn 

(8:49)-heck ur rly not answering mme r u

(8:50)-im bored anyways so im just gonna spam ur phone with bad jokes and stuff until i wither away and die in this prison cell of a school.

(8:51)- how many ears does jim kirk have?????? three. the left ear, the right ear, and the final front ear!!!1!!!!!!!!

(8:51)-dude u dont understand thats my favorite joke ever 

(8:52)- im all alone in this empty classroom.

(8:53)- all i wanna do is barricade the door, les mis style, w desks and chairs. sing abt social change. i can so do that omfg

(8:53)-im doing it and u cant stop me

(8:54)-shit these desks r heavy wtf il just use like 2 desks.  lots of chairs. this is gonna b so good 

(8:54)-gotta make an impression, right?

(8:54)- i dont know ur name.

(8:54)-how do i not kno ur name. i need to know ur name. what is your name. what is it.

(8:55) is it george? im barring the door rn

(8:56)- im singing now. im such a rockstar. (red the blood of angry men, dude.)

(8:57)- my blood is on fire todya which prob isnt a good sign but wow wow wowo wowowowowowowowowowowwoowowowowowowowow wow wow wow im like dawn from buffy im a mystic ball of energyand also like, caffeine but i havent had any. the teacher is coming back i c her from the chickenwired window in the door.

(8:58)- fred? phillip? brendan? corin? josè? aaliyah? what gender identifying word is closest to the way ur brain percieves ur gender????? these r things i must know if we r gonna be Best Buds 4 Lyfe!!!!!!!! my name's newt btw. newton, yknow? like the scientist. 

(8:59)- the teacher is so fucking pissed at me. oh my god.

(9:00)-i let her in. shes yelling. god bless.

(9:00)-Marie is having her phone taken away until the end of her detention sentence. Please refrain from texting her until then.

(10:15)-That was interesting, to say the least. You tell awful jokes.

(10:15) I didn't expect you to be a musicals 'junkie'.

(10:17)-You threw a desk and barricaded a door on your first day, may I remind you that you will most likely have to endure 4 entire years at that school? You certainly know how to make an entrance. 

(10:18)-Also, I see no reason to give you my name, seeing as someone lied about what her name was. 

(10:20)-well, dude, i like musicals ok. also, i /really/ know how to make an entrance. 

(10:22)-and, fucking hell, i just saw what ms. brown wrote god fucki ng FUCK   fuck fuck fuc k fUCK 

(10:23)-I am actually confused as to how many different times you can put one expletive in a single text. What was wrong with what Ms. Brown wrote? It seemed better written than anything you've managed to punch out in the last few hours.

(10:24)-she used my fucking biirthnam e she used my birthname fuck fucK u werent supposed to know, idk man i just thought i could make a friend who calls me by my name okay? im sorry im gonna punch ms brown in her fucking face im so pissed rn

(10:25)-Hermann.

(10:26)-what?

(10:26) My name is Hermann.

(10:27)-dude your name is so great, it fits the grumpy old man texting perfectly.

(10:28)-Thank you, Newton.

(10:30)- I chose it myself.

(10:30)-dude we both chose our names oh mannn thats so cool r u serious 

(10:31)-Of course I'm serious. 

(10:31)-Now, in your words, "what gender identifying word is closest to the way ur brain percieves ur gender?????". It was surprisingly poetic.

(10:32)- um......not girl. not boy. weird ball of energy and possibly radical sirens and other faerie-esque creatures on skateboards. they/them. u?

(10:34)-Again, how poetic. Boy, I suppose. He/him, pronoun-wise.

(10:34)-u suppose? r u trans???????!?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!????!?!??!!!!! dude do u comprehend how cool it would b if we were both trans kids who magically became best buds thru texting???? 

(10:34)-I am, and I agree, it is a strange coincidence, given the statistics.

(10:35)-dude im flippin g shit over here

(10:36)- in algebra 2 and im grinning. no one grins in alg2. everyone knows somethings up. this is the best

(10:36)-wait

(10:37)-r u texting in class

(10:38)-No, of course not. It's Gym class. I am allowed to stay out of the class. 

(10:39)-it's still textin gin class, buddy. im so proud

(10:40)-Shut up.

(10:40)-shit i laughed. cue intense 'coughing fit'

(10:40)-shi t she's coming over. coughing intensifiessshi

(10:40)-Incredible.

(3:01)-heyyyyyy hermann. got my phone back. she read like five of our texts. they were the boring ones tho, not our supersecret trans soul rebel shit we got going on.

(3:03)-first day over! damage check-new friend, in-school suspension for two weeks, as well as an in-school psychoanalyst (like i need another one, though, really) and weekly meetings w the school therapist. slight fame for barricading the door. also for throwing school property. cool girl is part of theater club! she heard about it and i am now a member of said club. also i think all the teachers hate me. no one will let me test out of bio. what bout u?

(3:07)-My classes are relatively simple, I was accidentally texted about Punnett Squares by a complete lunatic, said lunatic and I had a moderately surprised reaction to the other being transgender. I sat out of Gym, and was pushed into a locker by three upperclassmen.

(3:08)-dude wtf why were u shoved into a locker what the hell man thats awful ??????!!

(3:08)-It's nothing.

(3:09)-ok wanna play a game?

(3:09)-I'm vaguely suspicious. I'm not sure if I want anything to do with you and 'a game', Newton.

(3:10)-i ask u a question. u answer, ask me a question. getting to know u

(3:10)-getting to know all about u

(3:10)-getting to like u

(3:10)-getting to know what to say

(3:10)-Theater club is a good match for you.

(3:11)-I'll only play if we don't talk about physical features or any other contact information.

(3:12)-I know. mako (cool girl) was so proud of me.

(3:12)- sweet ok. what is ur favorite color?

(3:13)- Green. What is your favorite movie?

(3:14)-any of the old godzilla movies. sharknado was baller too though.

(3:14)-Of course.

(3:15)-favorite subject in school?

(3:15)-Math. What music do you listen to?

(3:15)-hold on 

(3:20)- so i listen to everything, right? like, my phone is a mess of rammstein and kesha? but also like, everything in between and over and around and stuff. indie stuff no one's ever heard of. u know. right now im listening to against me! though because um amazing?? queen of my existence. i have a whole 'trans' playlist its wonderful. but yeah. i listen to everything.lots of musical music and stuff. n2n, les mis, rent, newsies. lots of that stuff. pop music and beethoven. sousa. i really love music??? ok what is ur favorite food?

(3:22)-You certainly are eclectic. Food? Most likely, Bratkartoffeln. What is the best weather to have?

(3:22)-bless u. (i just looked it up it looks really good??? v german) i like thunderstorms. what type of ancient architecture is the best?

(3:23)-Greco-Roman, obviously. Least favorite word?

(3:24)-good choice, man. probably moist. like, what the hell??!? why were you pushed into a locker?

(3:25)-Physical attribute. Game over.

(3:26)-shit

(3:27)-fuck, man, i'll tell u one personal thing about me if u tell me one abt u

(3:27)-How personal?

(3:28)-i mean we already know about the trans thing, how much more personal can u get?

(3:28)-rhetorical question. don't answer.

(3:29)-umm idk how deep:&personal r we willing to get here?

(3:29)-I'm not willing at all.

(3:30)-im kinda glad.

(3:31)-Good. Now, I've arrived at home. Goodbye for now, I suppose.

(3:31)-bye herms!

(3:31)- Please do /not/ call me Herms ever again.

(3:32)-whatever u say herms

(11:10)-hermann wake up r u ready

(11:10)-hermann hermann hermann

(11:11)-hermann make a wish

(11:12)- u didn't wake up.

(11:12)-i wished for a komodo dragon and an against me concert.

(11:13)-nightynight

(11:14)-i mean. 4 u probably.

(11:15)-sleep is for the weak.

(11:15)-ur exempt from that tho

(11:16)-goodnight, herms

Chapter Text

(7:04)-dude u didnt make a wish last night. ur gonna have to stay up with me tonight so i can make sure u wish.

(7:06)-Right. Do you have your Komodo Dragon yet? Or tickets to that concert you wanted?

(7:06)-that's not the point!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the point is that u make a wish. u gotta believe in something. even if that belief is just u believeing in me to make a wish, and me believing in u making a wish. u gotta do it. it's law. i send a mass-text at 11:11 every night and most mornings. it is VITAL, dude. its necessary.

(7:09)-Alright.

(7:09)-it took you three entire minutes to type 'alright'???????? what the hell, herms? u had me on the edge man

(7:10)-I was not sure how to respond.

(7:10)-what do u mean???? im just asking u to believeeeeeeeeeee /do you believe in magic is playing in the background of this conversation just saying/

(7:10)-u must b really regretting me as ur trans buddy 4 lyfe dude omg

(7:11)-u. the stoic, mathematical, prob german trans man /sorta/. u probably listen to bach and beethoven and stuff, right?

(7:12)-and then theres me, suspended for two weeks and currently waiting for my schools psychoanalyst. also i danced to queen and singing russian metal music while making a red velvet browniecake last night.

(7:12)-i don't sleep much.

(7:13)-Delightful. 

(7:13)-I listen to many things, Bach is amongst them.

(7:14)-I never agreed to be "trans buddies 4 lyfe", Newton. Did you rope me into being your friend with our minority status as the hypothetical rope?

(7:16)-i might have kinda done exactly that. u cant escape now, tb4l (trans buddy 4 lyfe. abbreviated. this is so great)

(7:17)-I have a sinking feeling that this will never end.

(7:17)-true

(7:17)-shittt the psychoanalyst is here. awful mustache. send help. fml

(7:18)-Have fun, Newton.

(10:03)-im out. i have to see him twice a week. kill me. 

(10:03)-i kniw ur probably in class dude but daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn i told him my preferred name and why i want to be called nawton.

(10:06)-he put it down as 'confused girl'. im serious. im outside. im calling tendo right now they're a sophomore (they're who i was trying to text. they're trans 2, which is like, whoa. i know 2 trans people. we should start a club. first agenda: burn mr johanssen's house down) im calling thme i dont give a fuck. i would call u but i dont think u would like that. im so angry dude. 'confused girl' and that was in the first 5 minutes.

(10:09)-he said i had no riht to change the name my mother oh-so-lovingly gave me. also he mocked my name. aaaaaaaand!!!!!! he said i have a bunch of disorders i know i dont have and i corrected him bc 'no, dude, i dont have that i have this this and this. u said none of those' and he said i was self-diagnosing (which isnt even bad wtf) ans i shouldnt talk back to him. i will stab him. right in the fuckin g chest im gonna kill him fucK

(10:10)-one of my problems is anger issues. if u didnt already guess. oops.

(10:18)-i didn't kill him. i did report him o the principal and presentedmy medical history. told her to hire someone who would force me to tears. im a good fake crier. also i was really pissed so that helped. she called him into her office. swag.

(10:22)-Remarkable. Your school sounds horrific. Tendo sounds kind, however. Let me know how everything works out. Bonus points if you include a musical number.

(10:25)-he had it comin

(10:25)-he had it comin

(10:26)-he only had himself to blame

(10:26)-if you'd have been there

(10:26)-if you'd have seen it

(10:26)-i betcha you would have done the saaaaame

(10:27)-Why did I ever doubt you?

(10:27)-im being called in too. at least i got those bonus points. if i die, u get my secret pet toad.

(10:28)-How valiant of you. 

(10:30)-Good luck.

(11:30)-dudeeee nothing happened.

(11:30)-literally nothing. he fucking strawman'd me. and slippery slope'd me. i didnt even know people did that outside of the internet and tea party politics.

(11:33)-it happened though. 'if xbirthnamex is allowed to declare 'herself' as neither a woman nor a man, then soon enough we'll have people insisting that genders don't even exist.' and 'xbirthnamex wants to change 'her' name. i cant see why 'she' would rebel so against 'her' parents. we don't want 'her' to have this sort of influence on other students. tendo was enough.' and then i started yelling. how r u?

(11:35)-Your school sounds terrifying. I'm actually not sure if you're exaggerating. I hope you are. 

(11:35)-I made a wish at 11:11. I debated whether to send you a text.

(11:36)-what did u wish for, dude??? 

(11:37)-I have to tell?

(11:37)-yesssssss!!!!!!!

(11:38)-it is a necessity.

(11:38)-It isn't a good wish.

(11:38)-Am I allowed to lie?

(11:39)-i just wished a violent death to mr johanssen and also his family. he has 2 kids i think? it cant be too bad. if it is, i will deal.

(11:40)-Death to my father.

(11:40)-okay. do u want me to wish for that, too? this seems dangerously personal.

(11:41)-I would not ask you to waste a wish for my sake. And, yes, it is rather personal.

(11:41)-okeydokie

(11:41)-im still really pissed and my mind is going vroom right now. could you tell me a story??

(11:42)-What a wonderful idea. Yes, ask the Mathematician to tell you a story. I don't know Tendo, but you would almost assuredly be better off with them, unless, of course, you want a wonderful story about fractals.

(11:43)-i dare u to tell me a story with a fractal as the main character oh my god

(11:45)-No.

(11:46)-it took u two minutes. u thought about it.

(11:46)-No I did not.

(11:47)-oh my god u did im laughing now this is wonderful

(11:47)-im

(11:47)-this is too much)

(11:47)-ms brown just said 'no tears in in-school suspension, geiszler.' this is your fucking fault im

(11:48)-I never thought, even once, about making a story about the Mandelbrot Set Equation and the Mass Energy  Equivalence Equation. I am in class, Newton. 

(11:49)-I am in class and texting you.

(11:50)- im sobbign how would that stor y evengo oh my god im laughing so hard im pretending i am rpenting for my sins bu t no. no. it is this. im crying bc of u. fuc k im so proud of u tb4l

(11:50)-I can only imagine you trying to explain this to your teacher. 

(11:52)-Yes, Ms. Brown, I am crying not because I am praying to God to repent for my sins against the poor, cisgender community, but because I accidentally texted someone who is pointedly not telling me a story about zn+1=zn 2+c and E=mc2. 

(11:53)-im fucki  ng 

(11:53)-im losing it im laughing so hard

(11:54)-my stomach kills rn oh my fucking go d

(11:55)-:)

(11:55)-i donT KNOW WHY I FIND ALL OF THIS SO FUNN Y BUUUT UR SmilEYFACE IS KILLIGN M E

(11:56)-I HAV  E TO GO BUT UR THHHE BES T

(12:02)-dude im in love

(12:02)-this fucking guy, ok, he made me laugh so hard i fucking cried. 

(12:03)-there are tears on my face. this is terrible. its so great. this i s so great im crying still

(12:04)-he made a not-story about fractals and e+mc2 and made a lil joke abou t cis people

(12:04)-oh no im still crying it was too funny oh my go d

(12:06)-who is he? Does he go here? I need 2 kno

(12:07)-dude its the funniest story i texted him by accident while trying to text u about the punnett squares.

(12:07)-so u hav no clu who he is

(12:07)-his name is hermann. he is the best. we can start a trans club w him. he made me laugh so much. but i also hate him bc he types like a teen in tweed. isnt tweed extinct? we just dont know. but oh my godddddd hes kind of the best. 

(12:08)-U r literally a walkin cautionry tale dude. Wtf.

(12:09)-who needs soap operas when u have me?

(12:10)-Dont give him ur address. Or nything else. 

(12:11)-do nudes count??????????

(12:12)- 

(12:12)-Pls stop

(12:12)-pffffffffft omg

(1:00)- I will be in the library, under strict supervision from teachers. Please refrain, if you can, from texting until 3.

(3:00)-yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

(3:01)-i was bored so i made u a playlist.

(3:02)-no russian metal i swear. it's all soft/slow stuff. idk what u like so i assumed. also some of these songs are romancey but like. theyre jsut wht i want u to listen to. platonic, yknow

(3:03)-I'm still skeptical.

(3:03)-Try it anyways.

(3:10)-cover me-bjork.

bravado-lorde.

science vs romance-rilo kiley.

t wo coffins-against me!.

midnight city-m83.

i've got a dark alley and a bad idea that says you should shut your mouth-fall out boy.

overjoyed-bastille.

heart heavy-mother mother.

communist daughter-neutral milk hotel.

9 crimes-damien rice.

halycon-ellie goulding.

i'm alive-next to normal soundtrack.

(3:11)-You put a lot of thought into this.

(3:12)-I make playlists when im bored. i made one for tendo too. mostly hard metal and then rick astley. 

(3:13)-They must be very pleased.

(11:10)-Hermann wake up.

(11:10)-I'm awwake, Newton.

(11:11)-I'm wishing for a slow painful rotisserie death of mr johannsen and hermann's dad. also a story about fractals.

(11:11)-I wish for a good life.

(11:11)- :) good

(11:12)-you all good, man?

(11:12)-I suppose.

(11:12)-do u need anything? u wanna talk? is 2 days too soon to get personal?

(11:13)-I am alright, Newton. I will last until tomorrow.

(11:13)-I'm listening to your playlist now.

(11:19)-It's not bad.

(11:20)-good. :)

(12:21)-I like your playlist.

(12:22)-A lot.

(12:22)-Goodnight.

Chapter Text

(5:13)-u up????

(5:14)- I am now, Newton. What is it?

(5:14)- nothin dude

(5:14)- i was just curious

(5:15)- Go back to sleep.

(7:16)-fuck

(7:16)-oh my gos

(7:16)-duuuuuuuude 

(7:17)-it's picture day and i totally for  go t 

(7:17)-fuckmylife666

(7:19)-What are you wearing?

(7:19)-im too freaked to even make a sext joke,  o man

(7:20)-just know that i would

(7:21) a rainbow tank top. short-shorts. tank top says 'my name is newton' in sharpie. old man teacher just gave me a disappointed look. 

(7:22)-theyre not gonna send me to change, though. if they do i will tear down every one of those fucking umbrella things. they k n o w this.

(7:23)-mr johannsen is shaking his head at me adn i started laughing oh my ggod

(7:24)-I would be surprised by your ridiculously inappropriate outfit, but I'm not. Also, I greatly appreciate your lack of 'sext' jokes. I am surprised, however, at Mr. Johannsen's still being alive.

(7:26)-i mean its only been 1 sesh so I'm gonna try to break him first duhh i see him tomorrow so ill prob text u during that

(7:26)- re: the clothing dilemma. i snuck out of the house wearing this. my parents have no idea that im not wearing a denim fucking skirt and a blouse. oh my god this isnt how i wanted to come out 

(7:27)-goodbye, freedom. im so grounded after this. it was bad enough when i bleached my hair, & that was pretty innocent

(7:27)-alg teacher trying to convince me to change brb

(7:28)-Have fun with that.

(8:35)-well, pictures are done. i went thru with my coming out picture. kinda proud kinda terrified. whatever. ive started planning my coming out speech

(8:46)-dear mom and dad, surprise!!!!!!!!! im gay as fuck and also nonbinary! i have rejected the name you have given me but fuck that shit, dude, newton is a completely awesome name and youre gonna have to learn how to deal with it. also im dying my hair green tonight at tendos house lmao also my shorts are not too short my legs are sexy as fuck and i have a duty to the world to show them off as much as possible. my legs make the world happy, why should i deprive it???? ps im not a boy or a girl, as you can probably tell by now, and if you call me 'it' or 'a thing' i will fucking end you xoxo newton

(8:38)-I'm not sure if you're actually planning on giving that to them. If you do, I demand a recording of the reactions.

(8:39)-i dont know if im gonna do it tbh i might just hide the pics and let them wonder about where they went

(8:40)-fuck it, im gonna do it im gonna fucgkin d o it

(8:41)- If you do and don't record it, I will find you and your parents and make them dramatically reenact the entire thing.

(8:42)-i knew you werent a complete hard-ass!!!! im so proud of you, herms! ill have tendo secretly record it, ok? no need to stalk my family for a coming-out party. 

(8:43)-in return, though, you have to help me plan the presentation.

(8:43)-Hermann. Not 'Herms'.

(8:44)-awwwwwwww :( hard-ass is back

(8:47)-But your coming out has to involve something extremely stereotypical. Glitter? Rainbows? Musicals?

(8:48)-oh my go d i love you im gonna fucking do it im gonna do all of it im gonna blast 'im alive' and throw glittery goddamn rainbows at my parrnts and this is going to be wonderful i love you so much right now 

(8:50)-Thank you. I look forward to seeing it. You have, what, a month before pictures come back? 

(8:51)-yeah basically, dude, we can so do this! wwe can so do this im yelling

(8:52)-also im so glad u stopped the whole 'not texting in class thing'

(8:57)-i guess i spoke too soon

(11:01)-The food here is terrible. 

(11:02)-What is this? They say it's meat, but it is definitely not. 

(11:03)-I'll never forget to make my lunch again. This is excruciating.

(11:04)-hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha 

(11:04)-im so sorry omg

(11:06)-My faith in this school is dwindling.

(11:06)-omf

(11:07)-making a prayer circle for you with my glitter pens

(11:08)-I should have known you'd have glitter pens.

(11:09)-glitter pens are the best, man!!!

(11:10)-I'm sure they are. 

(11:11)-Make a wish, Newton.

(11:11)-dudE YOU BEAT ME TO IT UGHHHHHHH

(11:12)-We both made our wishes, correct?

(11:13)-yup. my wish was to have enough coffee in my house to keep me up long enough to finish 2 more seasons of community and also to have a good coming out. you?

(11:13)-To have the courage to come out to my father and have it be as interesting as yours is turning out to be. Sans the glittery rainbows and musicals.

(11:14)-Also, Community? The show?

(11:16)-i hope you can come out to your dad! also, hells yeah, community the show!!! its so good oh my god 

(11:17)-abed is the best ever dude 

(11:18)-Thank you. And I'm sure they are. (Who are they?)

(11:23)- oh my godd abed. hes so great. hes the best ever hes the best and his special interests are television/movies and its the best i love abed so much fuc k im so emotionally attached to him oh my god he's brilliant and funny and basically perfect oh g o d i love love llovw abed nadir god bless this world 

(11:24)-Sounds enjoyable.

(11:27)-fuckkkkk abed is the best ok please watch community for abed pleas e i couldnt get tendo to watch it and he's basically my only friend bc i dont know mako (combat boots girl) well enough to ask her to watch it with em. theres this girl that watches it but i dont know her so itd be really awkward to randomly start babbling about abed. so basically, you have to watch it so you can talk with me about abed.

(11:28)-Well.

(11:29)-I don't think that Community is "my kind of show".

(11:30)-pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee pleasssssseeeeeeeeeeeee

(11:31)-I will make an effort.

(11:32)-yeaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAH YE A AAAAAA A A A A  A A A  A AAAA       AAAAA YYEA HHHHHHHHHHHH YEAHHHH YYYEAH YYEHAAAYEAAAAH HHH      HHHH

(11:33)-Newton, breathe. I said I will attempt. 

(11:34)-i really like this show, dude, ok?

(11:35)-I hadn't guessed.

(11:36)-it's really good

 (3:02)-How was the rest of your day?

(3:03)-????? suspicion

(3:04)-What do you mean, "????? suspicion"? I asked how your day was.

(3:05)-you have never ever asked me that before. I'm suspicious.

(3:06)-I'm sure I asked you. You probably skimmed over it. It's normal to ask someone how their day was.

(3:07)-hmmmmmmmmm

(3:07)-^-_-^

(3:09)-What on Earth is that and what does it have to do with how your day went?

(3:10)-its batman!!!!!!!!! ^-_-^ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(3:10)-and it has nothing to do with my day its just cool

(3:12)-my day was p good actually

(3:12)-you?

(3:13)-Hungry, but bearable

(3:14)-did my prayer circle not work? ill have to have a talk with my glitter pens. they gotta learn how to channel energy, yknow?

(3:15)-Ah yes, I'm positive that's why my lunch was still inedible. Your pens do need to channel your energy to the Heavens better.

(3:16)-right??? pens, you need to step up your game. give hermann a good lunch!!!!!!!!! pens!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(3:17)-Thank you for trying, though.

(3:20)-nah no biggie, I'm going with tendo to buy rainbow glitter. we r gonna buy one bottle of glitter every other day so we have s o much of it to drown my parents in. their movement will be impaired by all this fucking glitter. drown them in glitter. d r o w n t h e m.

(3:21)-Incredible. It would take quite a lot of glitter to literally drown someone, but I'm positive that if anyone would do it, you would. 

(3:22)-Tell Tendo hello from me.

(3:23)-sure thing, dude! and hell yeah I'm going to be the first  person ever to literally drown someone in rainbow glitter while blasting n2n helllllllo guinness book of world records

(3:29)-tendo said hi to you too by the way :)

(11:09)-u ready hermann?

(11:10)-Yes. 

(11:11)- make a wish

(11:11)-Make a wish. 

Chapter Text

(7:00)-Good morning, Newton.

(7:07)-I assumed you were awake, are you? Your sleep schedules continue to evade me.

(7:12)-Circadian Cycles are important, Newton.

(7:28)-Newton?

(7:34)-Newton? 

(7:46)-Its another 1 of those days, isn't it

(7:47)-I thot it was all workn out tho

(7:51)-Definitly 1 of thos days. U haven't answrd.

(7:52)-Ill get ur homework&notes

(7:54)-U should tell ur textbff. Hell get worrid

(8:03) +group chat opened+

(8:04)-imnotfeelignme tendd o cn xplan gn

(8:05)-Newton?

(8:06)-Is everything alright? Newton?

(8:07)-They hav Bad Weeks n Rly Good Weeks Todays th start of a Bad Week.

(8:08)-Not in skool. Prob listning to a sad playlist in th dark. Its not pretty

(8:08)- +group chat closed+

(8:10)-I hope you're doing alright. I'll text you throughout the day because that's what you do when I don't answer my phone, and because I hope that you feel better soon.

(8:11)-Tendo said you have Bad Weeks, and I'm assuming that this is the beginning of one.

(8:30)-I tried to make a playlist for you. It didn't work out too well. I tried, though.

(8:31)-I do hope you're okay.

(8:32)-My Biology teacher was talking about genetics and Punnett Squares just now. 

(8:32)-Most people understand it. That's good. That is not like how your interaction with them ended.

(8:36)-I still can't believe you threw a desk and then barricaded a door with tables in a spur-of-the-moment Les Mis reenactment. 

(8:37)-It was amusing to me, although if you ever attempt to recruit Tendo into a remake of the Heathers musical, I have to say I wouldn't approve. 

(8:38)-Excepting certain targets, obviously. 

(8:39)-Speaking of targets for potential murder, you were supposed to see Mr. Johannsen today, weren't you? At least you're spared that much.

(8:40)-I don't know what's wrong so I have a very small chance of making any difference, but...

(8:40)-It's okay.

(8:43)-It's not going to be bad forever. Tendo said it was for a few weeks, at most, that you'd be like this, and I can only imagine what that will be like for you, but it will come to an end.

(8:50)-It's going to be okay, and I hope you can come to that conclusion, as well. You're certainly smart enough.

(9:00)- It's slightly unnerving to text while not knowing if you're even there.

(10:03)-Are you okay?

(10:10)-It's impossible for today to last any longer than 24 hours. You can do it.

(10:23)-If you can text back, even just a blank message, to let me know you're alright, that would be appreciated. Not necessary, though.

(10:31)-   .

(10:32)-Good. Good. I'm glad you're okay. This week will end soon. It's okay.

(11:11)-I wish that you'll feel better soon, and so you aren't upset that I've spent a wish on you, I'm also wishing for a metric ton of glitter to literally drown my father and Mr. Johannsen in.

(11:11)- .

(11:12)-We didn't tell each other what our wishes were yesterday. 

(11:13)-Mine was for a decent meal, and your coming-out recording.

(11:14)-When you feel better, you have to tell me your wishes.

(11:15)-I have to go for a few hours. I trust you.

(2:03)-Have you eaten today?

(2:04)-As someone who knows biology, you should know how vital food is.

(2:07)-Please eat something.

(3:01)-Newton

(3:02)-?

(3:08)-Please tell me there's any way I can get in contact with Newton.

(3:10)-Sry, no cn do. Thy kinda dissapr off th face of th earth

(4:12)-Could I have another blank message if you're alright? Or "Y" for "Yes, I'm okay" and "N" for "No, I'm not"?

(4:13)-Anything, Newton.

(4:14)- ,

(4:14)-I am taking that to mean you're alive.

(4:15)-mayb e

(4:15)-Take care of yourself, Newton. Please? Eat something, drink some water.

(4:16)-If you're willing to talk...

(4:19)- ,,,

(4:21)-Okay. Be careful, Newton.

(11:11)-Feel better soon.