Archive of Our Own ^beta

It was a peaceful night like any other in Dreamland. After a long day of playing with his friends and eating his weight (or maybe more) in food, Kirby was ready for bed. He put on his favorite nightcap, crawled into bed, and was asleep before his head even hit the pillow.

Before long, he was enjoying a dream about hanging out at the beach with his friends. King Dedede was reclining in a beach chair with a mirror under his chin, sunbathing. He was sporting a pair of sunglasses and his robe was lying in the sand next to him. Meta Knight was sitting on a beach blanket, reading a book. Bandanna Waddle Dee was cooking some hamburgers on a grill. Kirby's aquatic friends, Chuchu and Kine, were swimming around in the shallows. Gooey was on a nearby pier, fishing. He kept catching pieces of cake, sandwiches, and other things one would not expect in an ocean, but because this was a dream, no one questioned it. As for Kirby himself, he was playing volleyball with Rick, Nago, and Coo.

Everything was going just great until Rick served the ball just a little too hard. It went sailing over everyone's heads and landed halfway down the beach.

"Oops. Sorry," the hamster said, rubbing the back of his head.

Kirby shrugged. "It's okay. I'll go get it!"

The pink puffball ran after the ball, grabbing it before it could roll into the water. But as he turned around to head back to the game, he found the beach empty.

He muttered a confused "Poyo?" under his breath as he looked around. All of the possessions were there - the volleyball net, the king's chair, and Gooey's fishing rod - but their owners were gone without a trace. The sun was also much lower in the sky, as if the day had magically skipped several hours.

"Guys? Guuuuyyyyys!" Kirby called out. "Where are you? Where'd you go?"

He suddenly heard a splash nearby. He turned to find...a Scarfy rising out of the water. A very big Scarfy - easily the size of a Phan Phan. It already had its single eye out and snarling at him.

Kirby jumped back, still holding onto the ball, and glared back at the mutant monster. Despite its size, there was still only one of them; this shouldn't be too hard. Just keep out of its way until it self-destructs...

He heard growling behind him. He turned to find...more giant Scarfies. A lot more giant Scarfies. They were coming up out of the sand, which had turned a garish mix of neon orange and pink. They flew down from the sky, which had now turned dark blue and cloudy. Many of them just seem to pop right out of thin air. Their fangs were out and had him completely surrounded.

Kirby braced himself. He had been in tougher scrapes than this right? The huge Scarfies pounced on him all at once, but he managed to dodge them by jumping straight up. As he flipped around in midair, he suddenly noticed his volleyball had changed color, too. It had gone from grey to a bluish-purple with a white star pattern.

He let out an annoyed sigh. A massive Scarfy about twice the size of King Dedede suddenly teleported in front of him, its jaws agape and ready to swallow him whole. Kirby just hurled the "volleyball" in its face, causing it to explode (he swore he heard someone yell "OUCH!" as it happened). The resulting blast caused any nearby Scarfies to also self-destruct, which in turn caused a chain reaction that destroyed the rest of the swarm.

Kirby carefully floated down to the ground amidst the smoke. "Nightmare, quit messing with my dreams!" he shouted.

A cackle cut through the smog. "Oh Kirby, you were always such a spoilsport!" a familiar raspy voice hissed from all directions. "I had a whole routine planned, and you had to just go and ruin it!"

The dust finally settled, revealing an equally-familiar tall figure draped in a dark blueish-purple star-patterned cape. The figure sported a horned helmet, a wide, fanged grin, and and even wider chin.

"Long time no see, Kirby," the fiend said, smugly.

Kirby rolled his eyes. "Nightmare, what are you doing here?" he said. "Didn't I beat you, like, a long time ago?"

"Oh, you know...I am but a dream in your heart and all that jazz," Nightmare explained. "As long as there is enough fear, I can always regenerate. And events in Dreamland over the past few years have apparently been quite...traumatizing. Maybe it hasn't been fun for you, but it's certainly put a spring back in my proverbial step!" A skeletal hand emerged from the cloak, and a star-shaped energy projectile formed between the bony fingers. "Now how about we settle the score?"

"No, Nightmare, I don't want to fight you!" Kirby said, shaking his head. "I've been doing a lot of fighting lately, and it's getting boring! Why don't we just go back to playing volleyball? You don't hafta be the ball this time..."

Without warning, Nightmare flung the star at Kirby. The puffball jumped backwards, and it exploded harmlessly in the sand. "Sorry, but you don't have a choice in the matter!" the wizard said.

"Want to bet?!" Kirby snapped just before pinching one of his cheeks.

Nothing happened.

Nightmare cackled. "Nice try, but I made sure to put you into a coma," he said. "You can't wake up until one of us is defeated!"

Kirby let out a long groan. "Fine! Let's get this over with..."

He held out an arm and concentrated. In a flash of light, a red-and-white striped wand with a golden star tip appeared in his paw.

Nightmare melodramatically clutched his amulet and placed the back of his hand against his forehead. "Oh nooooo, the Star Rod!" he whined in the most sarcastically distressed voice he could muster. "I'm helpless against its power! Whatever shall I do?!" He put his arm down as his grin widened. "Oh, maybe this?!"

He made a crushing motion with a hand, and Kirby's Star Rod turned to dust.

"What the-?!" the puffball cried, staring at his empty paw.

"You're in my world now, Kirby!" the wizard laughed at him. "You've got to do a lot better than that!"

The young puffball looked around nervously. What was he going to do now? The Star Rod was the only thing he knew of that worked against Nightmare. Or was it? Well, there was another rod that worked pretty good against those other forces of darkness...

He held out his arm again, and a different wand appeared in his paw. This one was red and yellow and topped with a golden heart. He swung the rod at Nightmare, bombarding him with a barrage of heart-shaped projectiles.

Every shot landed, but nothing happened. Nightmare just kept on laughing, putting his hands on his non-existent hips. "Oh please, do I look like one of those overgrown gazers? Try again!" Once again, he clenched his fist, and the Love-Love Stick shattered.

Kirby gritted his teeth. Time to pull out the stops and really let this guy have it. The next weapon he had in mind was the one he used to defeat Void Termina; if this didn't get him, nothing would! He held out his arms, and a pair of golden star-shaped wings with rainbow feathers materialized around him. A pink heart-shaped visor formed over his face.

Nightmare clapped his bone hands together. "Ooh, would you look at that?! Your newest toy looks like it could actually pose a challenge!" he shouted. "Give me your best shot, Kirby! You might just beat me this time!"

The puffball let out a loud cry as he fired a huge, rainbow-colored beam at the demon. Nightmare held up his hands and countered with his own beam of dark stars. However, Kirby's beam quickly overpowered and negated Nightmare's spell. It collided with the fiend and rammed him into a palm tree, causing an explosion. When the dust settled, there was a big crater in the sand and large chunks of burnt wood, but no sign of Nightmare.

Kirby breathed a sigh of relief. Was it over now? But wait, why wasn't he waking up? Did the wizard lie about that, or-?

Something cold tapped him on the shoulder.

Kirby tried to whip around, but the Sparkler's wings were in his way. A second later, they suddenly dissolved revealing Nightmare floating behind him.

"I can teleport, you know," he said, that awful grin creeping across his face.

Kirby's eyes went wide. What was it going to take to get rid this guy?!

"I'll admit, you almost had me with that last one!" the wizard snickered as he loomed over the confused puffball. "But I think your lucid dreaming needs some work, my friend."

"Friend"? That's it! But would it work on someone like Nightmare? It was a stretch, but it worked on a lot of other people. It also worked on Void Termina...sort of. Maybe.

Kirby raised both arms over his head and concentrated. There was another flash of light and a giant pink heart that was surrounded by smaller heart-shaped bubbles appeared in his paws.

He expected Nightmare to come up with another snarky remark, but was surprised to hear a gasp that didn't sound the least bit sarcastic. He teleported back a few feet, the wicked grin gone from his face. His red eyes were goggling at the heart over the rim of his sunglasses. He made that crushing motion with both his hands, but the heart resisted his shattering spell.

Kirby rushed forward to use the Friend Heart on Nightmare, but he immediately teleported away. The puffball looked around to find the demon behind him again, but several yards away.

"P-put that thing away!" Nightmare barked. "Do you have any idea how dangerous it is?!"

Kirby looked at him, confused. "What? It's just a Friend Heart," he replied.

"'Just a Friend Heart'? Just a Friend Heart?!" Nightmare buried his face in his bony palms. A moment later, an eye peeked out from between his long fingers and over his shades. "You really don't know, do you?"

"Of course I do!" Kirby said. "I give this to people, and they become my friend!" He paused. "Uh, most of the time, anyway."

"No, not that!" the fiend sneered. He let out an long, irritated groan and held out a hand. "Here!" A folding chair suddenly materialized behind Kirby. "Have a seat and let Uncle Nightmare explain why you shouldn't bandy those things around like toys!"

Kirby had to hang on tight to the Friend Heart as he was magically lifted and forced to sit in the chair. Nightmare teleported closer, but made sure to stay just out of arm's reach.

"Alright, first things first!" he said, holding up a finger. "I guarantee you that your heart is not going to have the effect on me that you want it to have. They may be inanimate objects, but they still have a bias. They're best suited to work on those who are cute and cuddly-" He waved his hand, and images of various creatures appeared in midair. There was a Waddle Dee, a Poppy Bros Jr., Marx, Pon, and Kon to name a few. There was also a Dark Matter with the caption, "Cute enough, so maybe" under it.

"-Or conventionally pretty." Nightmare waved his hand again, and images of Susie Haltmann and the Three Mage Sisters appeared. Weirdly enough, an image of Drawcia and Queen Sectonia also appeared.

"Someone like me would probably just explode or melt, or something," the wizard continued, conjuring up an image of himself. Next to it were the captions, "crooked teeth," "mismatched eyes (right is more orange than the left)," "no organs disease," and "at least my chin is manly?"

He snapped his fingers, and the images disappeared. "Uh, for the record, I'm not saying that I'm hideous, or anything," he said, rubbing the back of his neck while his eyes shifted behind his glasses. "It's just that...well, it would be really unlikely that a Friend Heart would find me handsome in any way."

"Uh-huh," Kirby said, raising an eyebrow.

"Okay, second point!" Nightmare held up two fingers. "Let's say, for the sake of argument, your heart did work on me. Well, if I become a good guy, your friends will instantly turn into bad guys. And other villains will suddenly become even worse!"

Kirby's eyes went wide. "What? Why?!"

Nightmare shrugged. "I wish I had an answer for that, but I don't," he replied. "But I've seen it a million times. Every time some insufferable jerk decides they don't want to be insufferable or a jerk anymore, the heroes start kicking puppies. And the jerk's partners in crime either turn into bootlickers or cannibals!" He sighed and lowered his head. "It even affected me once. I did things I wasn't proud of..."

Kirby winced, his imagination already running wild. "You mean you-?"

"Yes," Nightmare nodded slowly. "I gave a reformed tyrant a good dream once. The kind filled with kittens and bunnies! It was so degrading! I still don't know what possessed me..."

"Ohh," Kirby breathed a sigh of relief. Then he quickly added, "Oh yeah! That's...that's really bad! Just horrible."

"Experts have said the strange behaviors are caused by the universe trying to rebalance the forces of good and evil," the demon added, stroking his chin. "Confidentially, I just think the universe is lazy and makes any old person the new antagonist." He turned back to Kirby. "Anyway, the bottom line is that if you don't want King Dedede to start stealing food again, your knight friend to decide that taking over Dreamland was a good idea actually, or the Dark Matter clan to return and start eating babies, then you'll put that Friend Heart away and not try to use it on me!"

"Well, since you put it that way, alright," Kirby replied. But as he looked around, he didn't see any good place to stash this thing. Should he put it under his chair?

"Very good." Nightmare crossed his arms and nodded in approval. "Because point three is that all attempts to reform me have always failed. It's because I know who I am - a primordial entity of fear! It's not just my name, it's my nature. You've got to eat, your knight friend has to fight, and I have to give people bad dreams! What would the world come to without my talent for terr-"

He suddenly noticed that the puffball was leaning against the Friend Heart and picking his ear.

"Hey! Are you even listening?!" the fiend snapped.

Kirby looked up at him. "What? It's boring when you talk about yourself," he replied.

"Fine then! Conversation over!" Nightmare growled. "Let's resume our battle, shall we?"

Without warning, he threw a magic star right at Kirby. Caught unaware, the puffball took the hit - and the Friend Heart, which was still in his paws, went flying. Nightmare managed to jump aside, allowing the heart to sail past him. What he didn't count on was the heart flying straight into the volleyball net and catapulting right back at him. It stuck him square in the back and disappeared.

Several awkward moments passed. Nightmare seemed to be frozen in place, with his arms out in front of him, his fingers curled, his mouth open, and his shades askew on his nose.

"...Are you okay?" Kirby asked, breaking the tension.

"I-I feel...hot," Nightmare said slowly, "like I'm...I'm burning up!"

Suddenly, the flesh on Nightmare's face began to sag. Then his chin began to melt off followed quickly by his nose. His arms dripped with a mysterious blue fluid before they also began to liquify. Even his cape was pooling into a purple puddle beneath him.

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME?!" Nightmare screamed before his teeth fell out, followed by his jaw.

Kirby was too horrified to argue with him about whose fault this was. Sure Nightmare was a pain, but even he didn't deserve this. He tried to run to the melting wizard to...do something, anything. However, even though he was moving his feet, his body stayed in one spot.

The rest of the bad dream was decaying along with its creator. The sky had turned to static. The landscape had become a confusing mass of colors - hardly recognizable as anything let alone a beach. Seconds later, a blinding light poured from Nightmare's body just as he collapsed into a blueish-purple heap, and Kirby finally woke up.

He sat in bed for a few minutes, taking deep breaths and trying to calm himself down. His left paw and foot felt tingly for some reason. As he tried to massage some feeling back into them, he tried to process what had just happened. Did he really just defeat Nightmare with a Friend Heart? Or did the wily wizard stage that whole scene just to scare him? Maybe none of it actually happened, and it was all just his own subconscious coming up with disturbing imagery. He had been through a lot lately...

Kirby decided that there was no point in further agonizing over it, and that he should make some breakfast. The bad dreams certainly hadn't curbed his appetite. He hopped out of bed and headed over to his kitchen. After making himself a big stack of pancakes, he settled in front of the TV. His current favorite cartoon, The Plumber Bros. Ultra Show, was coming on in a few minutes.

However, as Kirby turned on the TV, he saw the news instead. That's weird, the news doesn't come on until later. Did he have the wrong channel?

That's when he noticed the headline: "BREAKING NEWS, FOUNTAIN OF DREAMS DESTROYED."

He sat there for a moment, his mouth agape. A Cappy reporter was saying a bunch of stuff, but he didn't hear any of it. He quickly changed the channel. Unfortunately, it was on every station. One report had an aerial view of a giant crater where the fountain should have been. The blast had also taken out the pond and all of the trees around it. Even part of King Dedede's Rainbow Resort castle had been partially demolished.

Kirby turned the TV off and gulped down his pancakes in silence. So much for the rematch with Nightmare just being a figment of his imagination. Who knew Friend Hearts could be so destructive - even ones that he created from memory? But what the heck was he going to do now? His mind started racing. What was going to happen to Dreamland without the fountain? Was Nightmare gone for good now? What if somebody found out? How would they find out?

He took another deep breath. Well, what he was definitely going to do now was make himself some more pancakes. There was no sense in trying to solve any of that other stuff on an empty stomach. As for the Friend Hearts, he doubted there were any more left in the waking world. But if he ever found another one, he would be careful about using them on someone who was overly...volatile.

As he got up to head back to the kitchen, he suddenly remembered another one of Nightmare's warnings: were his friends going to turn into jerks, now? No. Kirby highly doubted that making the demon melt counted as "working" on him.

But just to be on the safe side, he would watch the news closely for any stories about stolen food...