Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Jungkook wants to cry the moment his alarm goes off. It feels like just moments ago he finally collapsed on his bed only to now be dragged into the start of another day. The sun isn’t even up yet and it only feeds into his desire to disappear into his blankets.

He rubs a tired hand over his face, trying to remember what time he came stumbling in last night. Or this morning? He didn’t want to waste time changing or even getting in his bed properly which he now deeply regrets at the smell of faint alcohol that clings to his clothes and hangs in his room.

His shift at the bar last night went far longer than he had wanted it too but he has to pay for rent somehow…and school, and food, and bus fees. Basically he has to kill himself to survive. The logic and life of a college student.

The room lights up with a text from Jackson like clockwork.

Jackson-Hyung: Morning Kookie. You up?

He sighs and knows his friend will most likely call him if he doesn’t reply within a few minutes and if he ignores the call the guy will soon be at his door letting himself in to make sure the maknae is still alive. Something that’s definitely happened more than once only for Jackson to find the other simply dead to the world in bed.

Wanting to avoid that at all costs today Jungkook sends the other a quick response.

Jungkook: Yeah

Jackson-Hyung: Travel safe and promise me you’ll take some of the snacks I left for you last time alright?

Jungkook: Okay

He tosses his phone onto his mess of a bed and staggers his way to the bathroom. The lights are always too harsh for him in the morning so he opts to keeping them off. He’d rather avoid looking at the dark bags under his eyes anyways.

After splashing some cold water over his face and brushing his teeth Jungkook throws on a hoodie feeling comfort in the familiar weight of the fabric against his skin. Somehow 20 minutes have passed already and he mentally kicks himself for talking so long, knowing he’s minutes away from missing his bus.

~~~

He missed the bus.

Jungkook curses at the sky noticing the grey clouds seeming to gather directly above him. Perfect.

He knows the whole Im pack has told him countless times to call immediately if he needs anything whatsoever but he really does hate worrying them and being such an inconvenience. Somewhere in the back of his mind he knows life would be a lot easier on him if he just accepted their persisting invites to come live with them but he can’t find it in himself to take them up on it.

His grip tightens on his bag as he starts the now longer commute to campus, hating this morning that has already seemed to have drained him of what little energy he had left.

Of course when the first drop of rain lands on his cheek it’s not a surprise at all.

‘You should have brought an umbrella.’

Jungkook doesn’t bother looking, knowing Yugyeom is right by his side. The tone is teasing but only aggravates Jungkooks headache.

“Yah, you should have reminded me.”

Jungkook rubs a knuckle at his temple now sending a look to the other. Yugyeom chuckles but continues along. Jungkook checks his phone again, wincing at the time.

‘Your psych teacher’s gonna chew you out again.’ Yugyeom pokes as if reading his friends mind. He’s got his hands deep into his pockets and even though he’s just in jeans and a t-shirt he doesn’t shiver against the cold droplets that now pepper the world around him. Jungkook envy’s the other as the warmth from his own hoodie does almost nothing to keep the chill out.

The rain starts coming down pretty heavily, soaking right through his clothes and starting a deep to the bone chill throughout his body. When he thinks his morning can’t get much better it’s when he’s crossing the street that the world decides to prove him wrong.

There’s a screech of tires against the wet cement and the sound of his name getting yelled out by Yugyeom that freezes him in place.

The second his already aching head hits the cement hard he knows it’s done some damage.

“Shit! Are you alright?” A husky voice booms out. Jungkook blinks up and through the haze and rain sees a blurry figure taking off a motorcycle helmet. “I’m so sorry, my wheels slipped and-“ the mans words stop the moment his hand lands on the wounded kid, his eyes locking with Jungkooks, widening slightly.

Even though Jungkooks vision refuses to focus he doesn’t need it to know the guy in front of him is obviously handsome. His dark hair frames his face perfectly and the slight mullet looks like curling wings behind his ears. His eyes come into focus and Jungkook almost looses his breath, staring into those deep brown iris’.

“I’m…I’m fine, really.” Jungkook chokes out the words even though he’s anything but.

“You literally just got hit by a motorcycle, you’re not fine. I’m really sorry…” The guy says again seeming to be at a loss for words too. He eyes break away from Jungkooks and land on his hands. “Shit, you’re bleeding.” The strangers eyes flash a faint red, telling Jungkook immediately he’s an alpha, which explains the strong aura about him.

Jungkook hazily looks down and see red on his hands, scraped from where he most likely tried to stop his fall.

“Let me take you to the hospital or at least the school nurse, your hands are pretty scraped up and you could have a concussion.” The guy says quickly and the amount of panic in his eyes would otherwise be comical if Jungkooks head didn’t feel like it was about to explode. “Come on let’s start by getting you out of the rain.”

“Really I’m ok.” He let’s the other help him stand, stumbling slightly. The guys hands are warm even through Jungkooks hoodie and he leans down picking up Jungkooks backpack from the ground surprisingly swinging it over his own shoulder and carefully guiding Jungkook away from the street. Now that he’s standing he realizes the side of his hip he fell on absolutely throbs which he tries his best not to limp to worry the stranger any further.

Looking behind them he notices they caused quite a bit of a traffic jam, and also noticeably leaving the motorcycle behind. Thankfully the road is large enough for people to go around without much trouble.

“Wait, what about your bike?”

“Don’t worry about it.” He says so easily.

Once they reach the side of the road safely the guy starts directing the two of them to the bus stop bench. Jungkook stops in his steps pulling himself out of the grip the other has on him even though he’d love more than anything to sit down right now. His balance wavers without the support but he holds himself still enough.

“I’m ok, really. Thank you for your concern but I have to get to class, I’m already late enough as is and my teacher’s gonna kill me if I miss any more.” Jungkook says with what he hopes is a smile and reaches for his bag which the guy reluctantly allows him to take back. He frowns at the words giving a soft look of concern.

“I really don’t think you should be walking around right now…”

“I promise I’ll take a breather after my class.” Jungkook says, already knowing his schedule won’t allow it. “Really it doesn’t hurt as bad as it looks.”

“You probably have a concussion.” The guy points out again, literally pointing to the others head.

“I’m holding a full on conversation so I should be ok.” Jungkook offers, sending the other a small smile.

He looks far too troubled at that but Jungkook is grateful he’s not pushing him further, otherwise he would cave in a second. It seems it’d be impossible to say no to those soft eyes. 

As if just remembering he had it, the guy reaches into his back pocket pulling out a bandana, wrapping it around the worse of the two hands and tying it just tight enough to stay. “You can go ahead and keep this, I’ve got plenty. I just wish I had another one for you.” 

“Thanks.” The fabric is soft and the red color matches along with Jungkooks blood…something that he never thought he would be thinking or seeing.

“At least let me give you my number, that way you can call me in case of…well, anything.” Jungkook looks at the other, kind of shocked but with the persistent hand reaching out he fumbles his phone over.

The guy slightly pouts as he concentrates on putting his number in and then the phone is back in Jungkooks hands.

“I texted myself so I’ve got yours too.”

He looks down at the name saved there, wiping the rain off with his sleeve and smiling slightly at the two bear emojis besides a letter. “Your name’s V?”

“My real names Taehyung but I think V is more fun. You?”

“Yeah I think V is a pretty fun name.” Jungkook says, pocketing the device.

V brings a hand up to his mouth in a small laugh, revealing a boxy smile. It’s sounds like a literal E-he-he but it’s like music to Jungkooks ears that he knows he wants to hear more of. “I meant what’s your name?”

Jungkook feels heat rise to his cheeks and hopes with the cold they’re already red and it’s not noticeable. “Oh uh, I’m Jungkook.”

“Alright Jungkook-ah, promise me you’ll let me know if you need anything alright? I’ll be checking in with you. And please have a doctor look you over.” The concern masking V’s face warms Jungkook up a bit and he feels something tug at the sound of the comfortable nick name. He nods.

“I’m really glad I met you, sorry it had to happen with me literally crashing into you.” He says somewhat shyly, a look on the other that is incredibly endearing.

As if slapped across the face Jungkook suddenly remembers he literally is missing class. He bows his head to the other hating the heat that rises to his cheeks once again. “Me too.” Then turns to start jogging, leaving V behind him in the rain missing the smile left on the others face.

The world tilts far too much as he runs but he pushes at his feet to keep going.

‘I think someone has a crush.’ Yugyeom says slyly, easily running next to him.

“Shut up and no I don’t, he’s just cool.” Jungkook pants and wipes off the smile growing on his face along with the rain.

‘But really, are you ok?’

“When am I ever?”

Chapter Text

“I think I ran over my soul mate.”

“I’m sorry, say that again? It may be me literally just waking up or the hangover that’s currently plaguing me but I thought I heard you say soul mate?” Jimin’s voice is scratchy and it’s very obvious that he isn’t lying about the hangover.

Taehyung takes a breath. “I was on my bike and it was raining and next thing I know someone’s out in the road and I hit him and when I looked him in the eyes, which he’s extremely attractive by the way,”

“Tae .”

“Right, I look into those eyes and touched his arm and it’s like something I never knew was missing was suddenly found. A void in me was filled and didn’t ever want to lose it again or let him out of my sight.”

“I’m really happy for you Tae and will be even more ecstatic when I’m not on the verge of puking my guts out.” Jimin says dramatically and Taehyung can imagine his friend curled up under the covers away from the light.

“No Jiminie! You don’t get it! I hit him! With my freaking bike! He probably hates me. Oh my gosh he totally hates me.” Tae drops his head into his hands, grateful for the bus stop cover saving him from the continuous rain.

“Well did he tell you he hates you?”

“Uh…no. But wouldn’t you hate someone if they hit you with their bike?”

“I’d hate someone if they kept talking my ear off when I’m trying to work off bad decisions of last night. You’re fine Tae Tae, just talk to him and make sure he’s alright and then kiss and make up or whatever.”

“You are literally useless.” Tae smiles fondly, looking the way Jungkook left.

“You love me. Now goodbye or else I’ll bite you the next time I see you.” Jimin says with a cute imitation of a growl.

“Go find Jin hyung, he’ll make you feel better and less grumpy too.”

“He’s at work.” Tae can hear the pout in his friends voice.

“I’ll be home soon to cuddle you baby.” Taehyungs voice may sound a bit more degrading than usual. He would be more sympathetic if his friend didn’t keep doing this to himself.

The line goes dead with a huff and Taehyung smiles. He runs the last ten minutes through his head again. The Instant warmth he felt from Jungkook was overpowering. His eyes were doe like and his scent was like fabric softener and blooming gardenia, but also something somewhat sour below the surface as if the kid was hurting, more so than the damage Taehyung did to him.

Jungkook is literally adorable and perfect. Everything in Taehyung pulls to be next to him again, urging to be with him.

Gosh he feels like such an idiot, he finally met his soul mate, something he’s dreamed of since a kid and he screwed it up to high heavens. Of course he loves his pack with all his being but even just seeing Jungkook, feeling that connection changed everything.

He can’t believe he just let him go.

With a sense of urgency overcoming him Taehyungs feet move on their own. He catches onto the scent, now faint and washing away in the rain but still there. He puts on his helmet and prays his bike will get him to campus just fine.

~~~

To say it was useless going to class is an understatement. The moment Jungkook sat down in the back sleep tugged at him roughly and his head and hands hurt too bad for him to even focus. Finally sitting with his hip aching was too much of a relief to not allow himself to fall asleep.

It seemed like mere seconds had passed when he’s suddenly woken abruptly by a textbook landing at his seat, the sound echoing around his head.

“Jungkook ssi, I’d rather you not come at all than show up late and sleep through my whole lecture.” The stern voice startles him into being fully alert and he notices the class has started filtering out. He’s at least grateful she waited until the end of the lesson to yell at him rather than in front of everyone like she’s gladly done in the past.

“Pull yourself together. You’ll never get anywhere noteworthy half assing life like you’ve done all semester.” Her look is only a slight step above a glare and Jungkook stands quickly to bow and apologize, ignoring the stinging at his chest at the words.

You’re worthless

Theres no use in trying

Jungkook shakes his head as if it could dislodge the thoughts from his mind.

She huffs and leaves him to prepare for her next class, muttering “Disrespectful brat.” Under her breath.

‘Ignore her, she doesn’t know what she’s talking about. You work harder than anyone.’ Yugyeom says, sending a face the professors way.

Still being bent over in his bow, Jungkook grips the seat in front of him against the sudden bout of dizziness. He can’t bring himself to care about the words the teacher spat his way and instead closes his eyes against the nausea building and the way simply standing seems to tilt his world.

He does his best to pack his bag, or more like shove his things into the pack and pull on his hood to shield his eyes from the all too bright lights above him.

‘You really don’t look good, Kook. Maybe you should call Jackson? Or even V?’ Yugyeom’s tone is slightly teasing but heavily laced with worry. ‘Really, I think your head’s bleeding too and I for one don’t want to see you throw up.’

Jungkook stands up straight, brushing the other off to focus on staying up and not meeting the ground with his face. He chokes out a “I’m fine” making his way out the doors just as the next wave of students shuffle in. Yugyeom sighs loudly but follows his friend.

The hallway lights aren’t as piercing as the ones from the classroom which Jungkook is extremely grateful for. Even so, his eyes water slightly at the daggers to his skull. He leans against the brick wall focusing on his breathing.

“Jungkook!” A familiar voice booms through the hallway and Jungkook dimly realizes it’s BamBam. He loves the Beta with all his heart but he’s not sure if his head can take the volume of his friend right now. Once the other gets closer Jungkook takes a breath, hoping his hair covers any of the blood Yugyeom said he saw.

“Damn, you look like hell warmed over, like more than usual. Your scent is completely off pup. Are you ok?” BamBam lands a heavy hand on the others shoulder, never one to hold his tongue.

“-m alright, really.”

‘Obviously’ He dimly hears Yugyeom say beside him.

Jungkook pushes himself off the wall to prove it but ends up falling into BamBam’s arms instead.

“Shit, alright. I got you. Jeez, what the hell did you do to your hands? Come on, lets get you to the nurse okay?” The panic is so loud right next to Jungkook’s ear it takes everything in him not to tell the other to shut up. BamBam brings Jungkooks arm up over his shoulders to carry most his weight.

Things seem to be moving in waves and each step he takes ricochets against his brain making him wish he never woke up this morning at all. Closing his eyes seems to help stop his vision from swimming…at least a little…until it really doesn’t.

“M’ gonna be sick.” Jungkooks words do little in warning before he’s heaving. BamBam releases a few “shit”’s and Jungkook clamps a hand over his mouth, willing his insides to stay inside.

“Let it out Kook, it’s okay.”

Squinting his eyes open is a terrible idea but he’s able to see the trash can inches from his face. His body takes it as a sign to lose control and bile comes up. There isn’t much in his stomach to begin with, mostly water so it hurts all the more.

“You okay bud?”

Jungkook nods, grateful for his friend keeping him upright instead of face planting into the trash. Once the older deems him stable enough, albeit swaying dangerously, they continue their walk to the nurse.

“Hey, stay with me. We’re almost there buddy.” The grip on his upper body tightens.

“Frick is he ok?” A new voice rings out over the sound of the hallway.

“No, I’m taking him to the nurse so either clear the way for us or get lost.”

“This is my fault…” the words are said with so much sadness and Jungkook faintly recognizes the soulful voice.

”What?”

“I’ll help you take him.” There are hands on his other arm and his weight is now fully supported between the two warm bodies. They tread forward in spite of Jungkooks lack of participation.  

“What did you mean this is your fault?”

“I hit him with my bike and he insisted he was fine, I was getting worried so I came to find him.”

“You what ?” Bambam’s anger comes off in a wave.

Jungkook decides now is a good of time as any to check out and his body slumps in the others’ grips, the last thing he catches is a string of curses released by the both of them.

~~~

Jungkook comes around to the sound of Yugyeom humming something peaceful. He badly wants to fall back asleep to the sound, loving hearing the omegas angel voice.

“I think he’s waking up.” The voice he recognizes is BamBam and the whole day comes back into focus.

Jungkook jack hammers up and instantly regrets the movement as his head strongly disagrees.

“Woah, careful there. We don’t want you braining yourself again.” The other says, trying to help the younger lay back down but Jungkook fights against it, looking around.

BamBam is sitting next to him and his eyes roam over to the concerned faces of V and Mark along with Yugyeom sitting on the end of the makeshift bed giving him a look of sympathy.

Jungkook suddenly realizes he never told V where he was going. How the heck did he find him when there was literally all of campus to search.

“What-“ Jungkook starts but gets immediately interrupted by Jackson barreling into the room. It’s a comical moment, him and Jungkook making eye contact without a word and Jacksons heavy breathing echoing off the walls.

‘He’s gonna be pissed’ Yugyeom says, getting comfy on the bed to watch the show.

“I’ll go get the nurse.” BamBam says, speaking up and getting out of there quick.

“What…happened?” Jungkook can tell the man is controlling not only his breathing but his anger from bubbling up. He takes the now empty seat next to the bed looking over the younger.

“I uh…I fell.” Jungkook says before V can take the blame.

“Fell? BamBam told me you got hit, who the hell do I have to beat up?” Jackson says but his concern overpowers his anger. V shyly steps forward.

“I was the one who hit him. I swear it was an accident, I’m so sorry.” The poor guy bows Jungkooks way and Jackson’s tense shoulders ease up a little. “The rain made the streets slippery and I should have been more careful.” He gives Jungkook an apologetic look.

“You and I will talk later.” Jackson says pointedly at V still bowed down and turns his attention back to Jungkook speaking noticeably sweeter. “You alright? Nothing broken?” He rubs a hand up and down Jungkooks arm and his eyes land on the now bandaged hands of his dongsaeng.

Before Jungkook can answer, Mark speaks up for him.

“He’s got a concussion but the nurse said it’s a really mild one. She did meantion some other things that you should know though.” Mark says folding his arms like an upset parent and as if on cue the nurse walks into the small room followed by BamBam.

“Ah I see you’re awake, how’s the head?” She says sweetly. She seems to be about the same age as his mom but a few inches shorter.

Jungkook allows himself to take note of how he is actually feeling. The headache is still there although not nearly as bad as it was earlier and the nausea is blessedly gone for the moment. Seems he most likely has passed the worst of it.

His hands sting and his stomach hurts, but most of how he feels was already there before he even collided with the motorcycle. Which brings him to his hip. Yeah he wants to dislocate it from the rest of his body. It’s probably gonna turn into some nasty type of bruise but if the nurse won’t mention it neither will he.

“I feel a lot better and…” Suddenly panic strikes. “Crap, what time is it? I can’t miss my shift….” Not to mention the classes he’s already missing. He throws the thin blanket off of himself and ignores the exasperated look Yugyeom sends him. Jacksons comforting hand on his arm grips tighter keeping him in place.

“Jungkook I swear if you try to go to class or work right now I’m going to drag you back to bed myself.” Jackson’s look he shoots the younger means he’s dead serious.

“I already called your boss and explained. You’ve got the day off so don’t even worry about it.” Mark says softly, helping the youngers heart to settle down. Jungkook knows he’s either going to have to sneak away from the others or call in sick as well for the night hours at the bar tonight or run for it and see how far he can make it to actually show up for his shift. He hasn’t exactly told them about his second job and now does not seem like the right time to do so.

“Jungkook-ssi, when I looked you over, yes the concussion was concerning but not quite as much as the state of the rest of your body. Your blood pressure is far too low to be healthy. May I ask when’s the last time you ate?” She sits down in an extra chair in the small room and Jungkook feels the room become smaller with all the eyes on him.

“I uh…” He thinks but no answer comes, honestly not remembering. He tries his best to avoid Jacksons eyes but it’s as if his own are magnets to them and his heart sinks when he sees that look. That look that he hates seeing directed at him, a look he hates seeing on his friend. It’s a look that screams disappointment and concern and about a million emotions all at once, a look he knows is settled on the others faces too. “I don’t…”

He takes a chance and looks at V, startled at the down turned lips and crinkled brow. He looks absolutely torn and distressed at Jungkook’s lack of answer.

With the continued silence that seems to ring out the nurse sighs and looks to Jackson. “Are you able to get in contact with his legal guardians? Or a mate perhaps.” It’s not often that humans will mate with wolves but it is becoming something more common these days so Jungkook isn’t too surprised by the question.

“That’s us, we’re his pack.” Jackson says without hesitation, nodding to the others in the room. Family is a sensitive topic for Jungkook and he’s grateful to the other for his answer.

“Well, please make sure he eats something and doesn’t miss any more meals. Keep a eye on that concussion tonight and then you should be doing a lot better by tomorrow.” Jungkook hates that he’s suddenly a child unable to feed or care for himself. He’s 21 for crying out loud. She continues. “I’m also suspecting you haven’t been sleeping either Jungkook. I’ll provide a note for your classes excusing you for the next two days and then you’ll have the weekend so make sure you get plenty of rest. Avoid caffeine and stay away from screens and loud music before bed as well. I’d prefer not to see you here again Jungkook-ssi, and hope to not hear of any actual hospital visits from you in the future alright? And I mean that in the best way possible.”

Jungkook huffs at that, knowing full well he’s going to be right back in class tomorrow morning. He can’t afford to simply skip out or tell his boss he’s too tired to come in for his job. Aish Jungkook hates this all being brought out in the open, especially in front of V. If he thought there was any chance that the guy would want to be friends with him it’s all out the window now.

The others thank the nurse for helping and Mark leaves to go get the car. Jungkook accepts the Advil from her and Jackson gives Jungkook one last comforting rub on his back before asking V to talk to him in the hallway.  Jungkook fears for the guy but he’s for the moment grateful all the attention isn’t solely on him.

“Well, that could have gone better but also could have been ten times worse.” BamBam says bringing Jungkooks worn sneakers over to the bed. Jungkook refrains from allowing his eyes to roll.

‘Boy I’ve missed his optimism.’ Yugyeom says with a chuckle, moving as Jungkook starts to get off the bed, pulling his shoes on.

“Today turned into such a mess.” Jungkook says, letting out a breath.

“You know you really scared me kid,” Bam Bam starts, suddenly serious. “you passing out. I hate seeing you like that and don’t ever want to see you like that again so promise you’ll let us help you out alright? You don’t have to carry everything on your shoulders alone all the time, you literally have a whole pack behind you to help carry the load, or hell, take it for you.” The sincerity in the others voice is nice to hear and Jungkook nods, not trusting his voice or the right words to come out.

By the time the two of them leave the room Jackson is alone and V is long gone. Jungkook feels something tug at his heart but pushes it down instead. It’s what he expected so he shouldn’t be surprised.

Mark brought the car around to the entrance by the infirmary and before Jungkook can get in the back seat Jackson pulls him to the side, away from the others.

“I thought we talked about this pup. You said you needed your space and I respected that. You told me you were trying and that things were getting better. That’s the only reason I was okay with you living alone again. But this…this is too much Kookie.” He rubs a hand over his face. “I really don’t want you staying at that apartment right now. I’ve never liked the thought of you being alone anyways, and your scent has been off for a while now. We’ll take you to the pack house and I’ll go pack a bag for you while you rest. You can have as much space as you’d like but I’ll only be ok if it’s under our roof and I can actually see you.” Jackson decides, only angering the younger.

“I’m trying Hyung, and I was getting better. Yeah the past few days were just a slip up, but that’s all. I promise okay? I’ll stay at the house tonight, but I’m going back home tomorrow.” Jackson visibly winces at Jungkook calling the dingy cold apartment ‘home’. He knows his friend means well and he wants to just fall into the love and embrace coming from them all but he just…can’t. The thought alone terrifies him.

Jackson huffs, having already had similar conversations with the kid but never getting a clear answer to his stubbornness on the topic.

“We’ll get some dinner in you and get some cuddles too and then see how you’re feeling in the morning, how’s that?”

Jungkook wants to tell him that any food that goes down his throat threatens to come right back up. That when he lays down to sleep all the dark thoughts rush at him at once, robbing him of any real rest. He feels he doesn’t deserve to get better, doesn’t deserve their care, and no matter how many times the others tell him he deserves to live he refuses to believe it.

He wants to say so many things, allowing himself to pour his heart out and beg for help, but only one word makes it out.

“Fine.”

He’s fine.

Chapter Text

It’s in the car ride to the dorm that Jungkooks phone vibrates with a text. Opening it his heart skips a beat at seeing the little bear emojis and the letter V. They’ve got another 20 minutes in the car and they’ve opted to listening to music after realizing Jungkook wasn’t much in the mood to talk. He turns his full attention to his phone instead.

🐻 V 🐻 : Sorry I left without saying a proper goodbye.

🐻 V 🐻 : How are you doing after all of that?

Jungkook smiles slightly, hoping BamBam next to him doesn’t pry.

Jungkook : Tired, annoyed, embarrassed, nothing new really. Quite the first impression isn’t?

V’s response is immediate.

🐻 V 🐻 : Are you kidding? You’re talking to the guy who literally ran you over in the middle of the street.

🐻 V 🐻 : Speaking of have I said sorry yet?

Jungkook : Multiple times. Really no sweat, it was bound to happen sometime. I’m not exactly the most situationally aware.

Jungkook mentally smacks himself after sending it. He really isn’t painting the best picture of himself, not that there is much great about him in the first place but he could be doing better for his image.

Jungkook: Also I hope Jackson wasn’t too hard on you.

He feels someone looking over his shoulder and instinctively shuts off his phone, waiting for V to text again. Yugyeom frowns at him.

‘Ahh I was reading that.’ Yug says pouting at the other. Jungkook playfully elbows at him and smiles back at the content look on his friends face. His phone vibrates again and he reluctantly allows Yugyeom to read in on it too.

🐻 V 🐻 : He cares a lot about you.

🐻 V 🐻 : I still need to make it up to you.

🐻 V 🐻 : How do you feel about dinner tomorrow? I assume your pack want you all to themselves tonight.

🐻 V 🐻 : I can bring it to you. Since you’re supposed to be resting and all that.

Jungkook smiles at the way V doesn’t send the whole text at once but in parts, almost like he sends what he thinks right in the moment.

Jungkook knows the Im pack is extremely overprotective of him, not just because he’s their ‘maknae’, especially as of late and he’s not surprised that V picked up on that. He doesn’t bother correcting V on them not being his pack though, at least they aren’t “officially”.

‘I think he’s asking you out on a date.’ Yug says slyly. Jungkook shoots him a look that screams ‘stop it’.

He types a response, erases, types again and settles on,

Jungkook : That sounds great.

Ah that was a dumb response.

🐻 V 🐻 : Send me the address tomorrow and I’ll see you then:)

Jungkook pockets his phone and fumbles at the thin bandages on his hands sighing a little too loudly. BamBam gives him a look then practically throws himself onto the other, laying his head on Jungkooks shoulder and lightly scenting his neck. He can tell the other is releasing calming pheromones by the faint smell of citrus the becomes apparent.

Even though Jungkook is human his nose has always been hyper sensitive to smells, which comes in handy when dealing with a pack of moody wolves.

“Can we all agree on taking a nap when we get home, worrying my socks off about Kookie has been exhausting.” Jungkook rolls his eyes at the dramatic flare but welcomes the warmth from his friend. He lays his head on the blonde dyed hair tickling his neck. Mark and Jackson chuckle from the front both agreeing to the idea.

Jungkook closes his eyes, allowing a moment to embrace the warmth. 

~~~

The rest of the day went somewhat smoothly. The moment they got to the pack home Jungkook was tackled by and fretted over by Jinyoung Young-Jae and Jay B as well.

Youngjae, BamBam and Mark all live at the dorms and Jackson might as well too by how often he stays. The place itself is really nice and Jungkook’s honesty got no idea how the guys landed it for the price rent’s at. Sure it’s a little run down here and there but a stark difference to the crummy place Jungkook’s been staying at. There’s an extra room for guests but he’s got a feeling they keep it empty for him just in case.

They all but force fed him some dinner and sent him upstairs for a shower while Jackson got his things from his apartment. Jungkook protested strongly, knowing he’s going to get an earful of how empty his fridge is and how the only food left in his cupboards is Ramen, but Jackson had his heart set making it impossible to stop him as he literally ran out the door.

Jungkook was grateful for the moment alone in the spare bathroom, not only to call in to the bar for missing the night shift, (his boss was not happy and might have cussed him out) but to also be alone especially when he couldn’t keep his dinner in at all. The need to bend down in front of the toilet and expel everything in his stomach was too strong. He feels awful wasting their food but the familiar empty feeling left over overrides his thoughts.

‘Well, you kept it in a little longer than usual.’ Yugyeom says but the optimism falls flat and Jungkook can easily catch onto the sadness underneath his words.

His friend is sitting against the wall by the shower, there for comfort and support which Jungkook is extremely grateful for.

“It was too much. I just ate too much.” Jungkook tries to cover, both of them knowing that’s not the case.

‘Buddy, you’ve really got to stop doing this. You are literally running yourself to the ground.’ Yugyeoms words are soft again and Jungkook avoids looking at him, wiping away the slight moisture from his eyes. He flushes the toilet wincing as the movement aggravates his bruised side.

Getting undressed revealed his hip to be a whole painters pallet of colors cascading down his hip. It’s light right now but Jungkook knows in a few days the colors of the bruise will be deep and dark.

He picks lightly at the bandage against his temple, taking note of some of the dried blood still left there. The stark color of red stands out terribly against his pale skin. He can’t remember the last time his body had a healthy sunny glow to it…

After letting the scalding water turn his skin a bright pink and getting dressed in Jay B’s offered sweats and hoodie he allows the others to finally coddle him. They help change the bandages on his hands and rub out the tension in his tight shoulders. Somewhere in the back of his mind it yells at him he’s a waste of their space but he’s really missed this.

The exhaustion from the day is overwhelming and being completely honest with himself he’s so grateful to be cuddled up with his friends watching a movie rather than bussing tables at the bar only to get home in the early hours of the morning to a cold empty apartment. Being surrounded in the warmth makes it all too easy to slip into sleep.

~~~

“I’ve never fully believed in soul mates before, not to any crazy extent, but I swear the moment I looked into those doe eyes it’s like something in me sparked alive.”

Hoseok laughs lightly while the others send looks to each other. “I think our Tae is smitten.”

“I forgot how cute you get when you’ve got a crush, bear.” Jimin quips from where he’s laying over Namjoons lap.

“No you don’t understand! I truly believe he’s my soul mate.” Taehyung says with as much convincing in his voice as he can. The tone and spike in his smell makes his pack mates sit up straighter and lean in closer to him.

“We’re not making fun of you Tae, it’s just this is all kinda sudden. First of all we’re quite the mix of a pack without any omegas or betas, that’s already unusual in of itself and talk of actual soul mates is…not common.” Jin rubs a hand at the nape of the younger neck.

“I know. And none of this means I love any of you less whatsoever or that I’m unhappy in our pack because I’m truthfully more happy with you all than I ever have been before. It’s this feeling that I can’t chase away. Jungkook is something that’s been missing in me and everything in me wants to be right by his side.”

The others hum and he can feel their wolves reach out to comfort him.

“Alright, when do we get to meet this Jungkook then?” Namjoon says after a beat. “I’m assuming we all agree that courting Jungkook is a step we’d all be willing to take, after meeting and approving of him first of course?” The others turn to Tae.

“Soon, hopefully. He’s hurting, I can tell that much, and I don’t want to overwhelm him whatsoever so…”

“Well you did run him over with your bike.” Jimin says under his breath and Tae grabs his slipper to toss at this Hyung but Jins steady hand lowers the footwear before it can leave the younger wolf’s hand. He settles for sending a look the others way.

“As of now maybe it’s best I get to know him first before we rush him. I mean not to be rude but the rest of you all are quite intimidating to say the least.” Suga shrugs at that, the first indication of having been paying attention this whole time, while the rest of them argue against it. Jin looks appalled while Jimin insists he’s more cute than anything. Hobi leans forward, brushing his wrist against Taes.

“Whatever happens we’re with you Taehyung. And if this all means we get to bring another pup into our family, I’m in.”

Chapter Text

Jungkook’s alone when he wakes up. Having a movie on and surround by his friends made it impossible not to fall asleep, but the moment he went to an actual bed in the room they have set up just for him? Wide awake. Jackson offered to sleep with him and left no room to argue even if Jungkook wanted to.

He used the excuse of staying with Jungkook for the need to wake him up every hour or so because of the concussion. The every hour wake up call got very annoying very quickly but he’d gladly take that over any brain damage he’d somehow cause himself. Either way it would have been a fitful nights sleep because of the nightmares that come to plague him so often. Having a warm body next to him helped keep those at bay at least.

Back at his apartment he’d usually spend hours just trying to force his body down. Sometimes he can exhaust himself out enough he all but falls unconscious the moment his head hits the pillow but that’s only a lucky now and then occurrence.  Yugyeom tries to help every night when the restlessness and nightmares get too bad and Jungkook feels impossibly guilty. His friend sings soft songs or tells him stories, sometimes they just talk about memories and it does help but only for so long.

Jungkook brings his arm out of the warm covers to check his phone. If he hurries he can make it to his first class and if he’s sneaky enough he can make it past the guys. Missing even just yesterdays classes he knows it’s going to kick him in the ass. Midterms are coming up and he is no where near ready, struggling to stay afloat as is. Damit he just wants to sleep all day. 

Grateful for the clothes Jackson brought over Jungkook quickly changes, wincing at the pain cascading through his body. He downs a couple Advil before heading downstairs with his backpack slung over his shoulder.

He’s an idiot for thinking he could make it past any of them without them hearing his loud disoriented ass come down the stairs in his stompers. Jay B’s the one that greets him, much like a parent catching their kid sneaking out, stopping him in the act of opening the front door.

“Jungkook-ah, going somewhere?” He eyes the younger knowingly.

“Yeah, if I leave now I’ll make it to class somewhat on time. I’ll come back later to get the rest of my stuff.” He bows to the other. “Thank you for having me over.”

“Take your shoes off Kook-ah, we’ve got breakfast for you.” He says casually reaching forward with a patient hand helping slip off the backpack strap from the youngers shoulder. “I’ve got your bag alright? Come on.”

“Hyung…” Jungkook stays in place. He loves the others with all his heart but being here sometimes…brings back too many memories. He feels like he’s taking something that isn’t his, that he doesn’t deserve.

“You’ve got the day off, don’t you remember? The rest of us have been looking forward to some JK time today too, you wouldn’t want to disappoint the others by making them see me come back alone right?” He smiles kindly at him.

‘He really is a sneaky one.’ Yugyeom says slyly. ‘You know he’s right though, they’d be devastated if you just left.’

Jungkook knows he can take his bag from the other and run out the door but the hopeful look on not only Jay B’s face but Yugyeoms is a look he doesn’t want to see fall.

“Alright.”

Walking into the spacious kitchen Jungkook guesses by their absence that Young-Jae and Jackson are both at work but BamBam comes to greet him in a bear hug and Mark waves from a cross the room.

“Finally you’re up! I was about to sneak to your room and wake you myself.” Bam Bam smells like powdered sugar, syrup and shampoo, and his hair is slightly damp against Jungkooks. He easily hugs the other back.

“Where are the others?” He turns to look around the kitchen but gets jerked back at arms length to be stared down by Bam Bam.

“I’m offended! Did I suddenly not become enough for you? I practically saved your life yesterday Kook! I thought we bonded!” Bam Bam pulls him roughly in for another hug before Jay B can pry him off.

“You know we want him to stay here right? Squeezing the life out of him isn’t gonna help.” Once released Bam Bam gives a cheeky smile before ruffling Jungkooks bed head.

“How’s pancakes sound?” Mark says, stirring a mix into a bowl. Now looking around the smell of sugar on his friend makes more sense. The kitchen is slightly in shambles, and plates of pancakes wait for them on the table. The room might be a mess but the pancakes do look delicious.

Jungkooks stomach however growls in protest in seeing the food.

“Ah I’m not that hungry hyung.” Jungkook says across the room but it doesn’t stop Bam Bam from stacking a few pancakes onto a plate for him.

“Please, I definitely just heard your stomach beg for a few of these bad boys.”

“How are you feeling Kook-ah? Your head doing alright?” Jay B says from his seat before taking a bite of his own breakfast.

Surprisingly his head’s gone back to his usual dull throb with only the occasional spike of pain which he guesses is from the concussion. His bandaged hands feel loads better and overall he’d rate his pain at a ‘not bad but could be better’ status. His hip on the other hand feels like it’s on fire and badly wants to disconnect itself from the rest of his body.

“A lot better, hyung.” He says, not exactly wanting to go further into detail.

Just then Young-Jae comes rushing into the room pulling at his tie and collapsing at the kitchen table. The wolves around him all perk up at the scent of distress even Jungkook can catch on to.

“Baby what’s wrong? Aren’t you supposed to be at work?” Jay B runs a hand over Young-Jaes scent gland and the wolf calms slightly at the contact.

“They sent everyone home, apparently some bug got into the system and they’re afraid it was an employee that hacked in.” He takes his tie off completely and checks his phone. “They’re doing a full company search hoping not to lose anything but by the end they’ll probably be having us all working overtime to recover it all and make up for lost time. The producers at the company are all pissed.”

“That’s not good.” Mark says, bringing a cup of coffee for his mate. “So does this mean you’re home until they call you back in?”

“Yeah, which could be any minute really. Shit, this is all gonna turn into such a headache.” He takes a sip of the welcomed coffee and stands, jostling the wolves hands from his neck and arm. “I think I’ll go lay down while I can, I probably won’t get much time to sleep much later.”

Young-Jae adverts his eyes from Jungkooks as he passes and heads straight for the stairs followed close behind by Jay B.

“I swear that company works him to the bone.” Mark says, grabbing Jungkooks wrist to guide him to the table. He notices the look lingering on Jungkooks face and ruffles his hair. “He’ll be okay Kook, no need to worry about him alright?”

Something has been off with Young-Jae for a while now. They all have had a really shitty year but for some reason Jungkook feels like he never really reconnected with the wolf, and honestly? He doesn’t know how to.

“And if they treat him like shit he’s got a whole pack that will give em hell alright? Now eat up before the food gets cold or I’ll be forced to make more!” BamBam says cheerfully, trying hard to bring back the light tones the morning began with.

“Where does he work again?” Jungkook accepts the fork BamBam hands over.

“Some music production company. Is he still under that August D guy?” BamBam asks around a mouth full of pancakes.

“Yeah, apparently the guy’s some hot shot music producer but cold as ice. There’s only been rumors of him smiling. No ones actually seen it before. But he’s good at what he does.” Mark says, dropping more fruit onto Jungkooks already overly flowing plate.

“Anyways, we’ve got the whole day ahead of us to do whatever we want!” BamBam says, almost vibrating from his seat with excitement. Jungkooks almost forgotten how much like an actual puppy Bam Bam is.

He feels a sting of guilt for avoiding the pack for so long. Making excuses of school and work pass far too easily from his lips but he knows it hurts his friends every time he declines their invites. His chest swells at how happy they seem to have him here, ignoring the way the feeling tries to immediately turn sour.

“Remember he got rammed yesterday so let’s keep it chill and quiet alright pup?” Mark says, sending the other an endearing look.

“I know mom .” Bam Bam drawls out, rolling his eyes with a cheeky smile on his face. He shovels the last of his food into his mouth and leaps from the table when Mark tries to whack him, just barely missing, bringing out a genuine smile from Jungkook. 

Chapter Text

Waves of nervousness roll over Jungkook. He wants to laugh at how ridiculous he’s acting and Yugeoms persistent nagging isn’t helping.

“How have I never noticed my entire wardrobe is black?” Jungkook says tossing another shirt over his shoulder.

‘You’re a goth, just face it Kook.’ Yugyeom says from the bed as if he himself isn’t in all black.

Jungkook settles on a pair of black ripped jeans and a tucked in shirt, black of course.

‘You know, I can’t remember the last time you took this long caring about how you look, let alone brushed your hair.’ Yugyeom lifts a knowing eyebrow at his friend and Jungkook can’t help but roll his eyes as he quickly changes into the fresh clothes.

He doesn’t know where the energy came from to actually try and pull himself together today but he’s grateful for it. It’s almost like hitting a a low point yesterday willed him to try and act like a regular person today. His headache has even lifted surprisingly enough for him to even say he feels good today.

“The Im pack already knows what a mess I am but this is my chance to save somewhat of my dignity and start new with V.” He shoves the rest of his clothes into the bag Jackson brought him, not bothering to fold them.

Jungkook checks the time again willing the clock to move both slower and faster for his nerves. The day ended up being nice and relaxing but the invitation of dinner with V hung around in his thoughts making him a nervous wreck. BamBam and Mark stayed with him all day, watching movies and taking it easy and even though all Jungkook wanted to do was crawl into bed his mind wouldn’t stop long enough for him to even slip into anything closely resembling sleep. He can’t place where his nervousness is coming from but he groups it together with the rest of his anxieties.

Maybe it’s the thought of having some come into his life that doesn’t know anything about his past, doesn’t know just how deep he’s fallen into his own darkness.

Now his nerves are making him antsy and he contemplates for the hundredth time canceling with V altogether. He said he’d bring dinner over and now Jungkook wonders why he ever agreed in the first place. He’s gonna waste V’s time and he’s just being an inconvenience-

‘Hey, knock that off. You’ll be fine and you’re gonna have a good time.’ Yug says, making it all sound too easy.

“Yeah you’re right,” Jungkook fingers the bandages at his palms. “I’m being stupid.”

His phone vibrates and Jungkook swears he feels his heart jump at the notification.

🐻 V 🐻 : I’m here, or at least I think I am!

Jungkook : Stay there I’ll come get you

Jungkook runs to the bathroom to take a quick look at himself and…not as bad as usual.

His dark eye circles don’t seem to stand out too badly and his hair covers the scrape on his head just fine. The outfit isn’t too fancy but he feels comfortable enough with his arms covered up and the bagginess of the shirt as well. Jungkook runs a hand through his hair, and pops a painkiller swallowing it dry. He shuts the light off before he can pick apart his appearance any more.

He tries to be quiet as he goes down the stairs, making sure to put on his stompers once he’s reached the bottom this time and makes his way to the front door. Before he can turn around and run to bed he wills his hand to open the door to reveal V with a picnic basket.

“Hey Jungkook, you’re looking good. How are you feeling?” V says and smiles that easy smile of his. Jungkook looks down at the words, his own mouth not working to fill the silence or respond. V’s wearing shades of brown and somehow looks dressed up but also comfortable. He reminds Jungkook of a french artist and definitely gives off that vibe of being comfortable in his own skin.

“I’m feeling alright V-ssi.”

“Hyung. You can call me hyung if you’d like.” V says to which Jungkook nods quickly.

He’s got no idea what comes over him but the words suddenly tumble out of him mouth no warning. “Why don’t we get out of here? To be honest I’m getting a little stir crazy here and…” his voice tampers off and he catches Yugyeom giving him an encouraging thumbs up.

“Of course, as long as you’re feeling up to it. Do you have a place in mind?” V looks so happy to even just be standing on the front porch like this and Jungkook can’t help but wonder why.

“Umm….” Mind drawing a blank Jungkook feels his ears burn red at the attention on him.

“Hey, there’s this place not too far from here and it’s hardly ever busy. I can drive us.” V says after a moment.

Jungkook wonders if it’s that easy to tell his discomfort with large groups in general and he silently thanks the other. He’ll send a text to Jackson letting him know he’s stepping out knowing he’s gonna get an earful from the wolf about his health later. “Yeah, let’s go.”

~~~

“A butterfly cafe?” Jungkook’s never been to one like this but the theme is pretty obvious going by the millions of butterflies painted on the outside.

“Yeah my friend owns the place.” V takes off his seatbelt and reaches in the back for the picnic basket.

“Won’t they be offended that we brought our own food?”

“It’s fine as long as we buy a dessert.” He says with a wink.

The inside is just as decorated and pretty as the outside is. Soft colors line the walls and tables and little butterflies hang from the ceiling. It’s calming.

Other than a couple in the far corner Jungkook and V seem to be the only other ones here which he’s grateful for.

V makes himself at home and starts to unpack the food he brought onto a booth table and motions for Jungkook to sit. With each new item V pulls out Jungkook can feel his eyes widen a bit more. There’s so much food. There’s sandwiches and kimbap, Mandoo and rolled egg omelets and containers of soup. And somehow it’s all still warm.

“This is…” so much . Mixed emotions rush though Jungkook. Guilt and surprise, most of all his stomach twists at the thought of needing to eat it all when in reality he can probably choke down only a fraction.

“You don’t have to eat it all, but my pack mate is one of the best cooks I’ve ever met and that’s not just because I’m biased towards him.” V says with a shy smile. “Ah spoons! I knew I forgot something! Just one moment!” V stands and that’s when Jungkook notices the wolf’s shoes. He can’t help but chuckle at the way he’s wearing them, not fully on but his heels are on top of the back almost like he ran out of time to put them on properly. Jungkook’s mom would scold him for ever putting his shoes on in such a way, ruining the back of the shoe, but seeing V wear it like that is incredibly endearing.

The owner of the cafe is suddenly at the front and he and V chat excitedly for a moment. Both of them look his way and blood rushes quickly to Jungkooks cheeks to which he snaps his attention to the butterflies above him as if oblivious to the fact they are obviously talking about him.

“Please start eating!” V says once he returns. “I ordered some cheesecake for later if that’s alright with you. If you don’t like cheesecake I can get you something else here too. Anything you want.”

“Thank you Hyung.”

‘Never knew you were such a shy flirt Kook.’ Yugyeom pipes up from a table away and Jungkook almost jumps at his words, sending the other a quick look.

Jungkook wants to explain to Yug that V is not flirting with him. He has a pack for crying out loud, he wouldn’t waste his time with a human like this…he’s simply saying an elaborate sorry for the whole bike thing…right?

“So you’re pretty comfortable with wolves. Or at least I take it you are by being in a pack of them.” V states more so as a fact rather than a question, then promptly takes a huge bite of kimbap.

“Yeah I guess I’ve been with wolves more of my life than humans actually.” Jungkook feels the need to clarify further. “But they aren’t my pack.”

V chokes a bit on the large amount of food in his mouth but covers it up by setting a container of steaming soup in front of Jungkook. He finally swallows. “You’re not mated?”

“It’s not that they haven’t asked but…” Jungkook takes the outstretched spoon unable to find the right words.

“So your family…?” Jungkook looks down at the soup, taking a spoonful into his mouth before answering. The moment the hot liquid touches his tongue it’s as if an explosion of flavor envelops his mouth. It’s honestly delicious. V offers a dumpling Jungkooks way, setting it on his plate and waiting for an answer.

Jungkook bows to the older at the action. “My family isn’t really in the picture.” Jungkooks tone is cold and he knows it. The topic of his family doesn’t fit in this sweet place and especially with V’s warmth. It’s a topic that would only turn a precious moment sour.

“Then they’re missing out.” Vs response surprises Jungkook. Most people say ‘I’m sorry’ or ‘maybe you should try harder with them’ or even ‘what did you do wrong?’

Jungkook feels himself staring and wondering how getting hit by a motorcycle was the best thing that could’ve happened to him this week.

V is incredibly enthusiastic with his food and Jungkook wonders when the last time he ate even closely resembling enjoyment like that.

The continue with their meal and Jungkook is suprised with how much he actually eats, even Yugyeom looks jealous. He doesn’t take as much food as it seems V was hoping but it’s more than Jungkooks allowed himself in a while now. The food being absolutely delicious helped too. Seeming satisfied that Jungkook at least finished the soup he stands to get their desert.

“My pack wants to meet you by the way.” V says sitting back down with the cheesecake as if the words aren’t somewhat like pulling the rug out from under Jungkooks feet.

“They…what? Why?”

“Because I like you Jungkook. Now eat up before I finish this slice all on my own.”

~~~

“Aren’t we going to the car?” Jungkooks confusion increases as V sets the leftovers and basket behind the counter. The owner, Seo-joon he finds out, smiles brightly at the two of them before wishing them a good time. The whole exchange only leaves Jungkook more confused.

“You think I brought you to a butterfly cafe just for the cake? You underestimate me Kookie.” The nickname starts up its own butterflies in Jungkooks stomach. “Come on, you haven’t seen the best part.”

He takes Jungkook by the hand, mindful of the bandages there, and leads the two of them to double doors on the other side of the cafe. It leads to a small room with another set of doors they continue through. The room they walk into is warm and bright and…Jungkooks breath is literally taken away. The room is filled with butterflies. Alive and fluttering and colorful.

V laughs at the look on Jungkooks face and it sounds just as soft as the butterflies flying around them. “Come on, don’t be shy they don’t bite I promise.” Jungkooks forgotten entirely that the other is literally holding his hand until he pulls him further into the room.

“How? I mean…this is amazing.” Jungkook can’t take his eyes off the rainbows of bright colors surrounding them. The room is filled with trees and flowers and it’s as if they stepped into a entirely different world.

“Come on, do you want to hold one?” V brings them deeper into the room, rubbing a thumb over Jungkooks knuckles as they’re now surrounded by them.

“Is that allowed?” Jungkook knows his eyes are as what the Im pack has described Bambi like right now, something that was pointed out plenty of times when he was a kid too, but he doesn’t care. Awe completely fills him and if he’s honest with himself it’s the lightest his chest has felt in a long time.

“Of course.” V gives him a boxy smile as if Jungkook is crazy to think he can’t touch one.

There’s a young mom with her child knelt down looking at a bright blue butterfly and an old man sitting on one of the benches just enjoying the view. Everything about this place speaks peace and solitude and Jungkook is loving every second of it.

V guides them to some yellow flowers and Jungkook would have missed the butterfly right on top with how well it blends in.

“Alright so what you’ll do is bring two fingers slowly to the butterflies legs and inch it till your fingers are underneath it. The butterfly will catch on once it understands you wanna hold it.” V releases Jungkooks hand to allow him to give it a try.

Jungkook feels his heart continue to beat faster than usual but it could be V’s proximity to him that’s making it race.

“Give it a try Kook.”

Jungkook takes a steadying breath and does what he’s told, bringing his fingers up slowly. The butterfly flies away almost immediately.

“That’s alright, here’s another one, let’s give it a try again. Honestly if you got it your first try I’d be insanely jealous.” V leads the two of them to a blue butterfly this time, one like the butterfly the mom and little girl were admiring.

Jungkook wills his hands to still and brings his fingers up even more slowly this time, doing everything he can to not scare the creature away.

The butterfly stays and when Jungkooks fingers are beneath it it crawls on, tickling his skin and speeding up Jungkooks heartbeat even more.

“I did it.” He says quietly, almost to himself. It’s almost like holding a little heart beat, a light of life. “It’s so beautiful.” Jungkook whispers, as if any louder will frighten it and ruin the moment.

“Yeah, really beautiful.” Looking up he sees that V is staring at him and not the butterfly. Suddenly shy Jungkook ducks his head back down at his hands.

“I’m thoroughly impressed you got it just your second try Jungkook.” V says just as quietly as Jungkook.

Yugyeom comes in close to look at the butterfly, something shining in his eyes that Jungkook wishes he could see there more often.

“I always hoped that when I die I’d come back as one of these.” The words come out of Jungkooks mouth before his brain even registers them. Yug looks at him, a smile of sympathy gracing his lips. The butterfly suddenly flys off, leaving a featherweight touch ghosted on his fingers. “Kinda silly I know.”

“No.” Jungkook drags his eyes to gaze up at Taehyung again but can’t place the look on his face. “Not silly at all.”

Chapter Text

A mansion. V lives in a freaking mansion.

Since the butterfly cafe Jungkook got dropped off at home relatively late only to get chewed out by Jackson about not telling the pack he was leaving at all and how he pointedly ignored all calls and texts. Jungkook probably should have set that as a priority to update them and in Jinyoungs words he was ‘being too reckless with his health’. So overall it was definitely a fun conversation where Jungkook felt like a kid being caught sneaking out.

V had invited Jungkook over to his place the following night for quote ‘the highest quality of hot chocolate’. The Im pack had agreed to let him out at the promise of being careful, cautious of the time, and swearing he would eat something for dinner. Jackson grilling V about those same things the moment he came to pick the human up was a little over the top but Jungkook was grateful to get out regardless of what it took. The pack had refused to let Jungkook sneak out for class or work so he was willing to promise anything to get out of the house to say the least.

Hence now being in V’s car…in front of a mansion.

“You live….here?” Jungkook feels his stomach drop as they pull up the long driveway. It looks like the house sits on the largest property in Korea not to mention in the middle of a freaking forest. Jungkook didn’t even think a place like this could exist so close to the city.

“Yeah, home sweet home.” V says with a smile, then as if noticing Jungkooks discomfort lands his hand on the others, rubbing his thumb over Jungkooks knuckles. “Some of my pack mates come from really wealthy families.” He says as if that eases all of Jungkooks nervousness.

“It’s….really nice.” Jungkook says lamely, trying not to freak out at the warm palm sending sparks of electricity through his own.

‘Quite the understatement Kook.’ Yugyeom pipes up from the back.

For some reason it seemed easier being with V before he knew the wolf was basically royalty, but now he feels too out of his depth. Almost like he’s something dirty in such a perfect pristine world.

They park and V squeezes his hand. “Come on Kookie, let’s go put an insane amount of chocolate in our bodies.”

They walk through the front doors and Jungkook is hit by an encompassing warmth. His whole apartment can fit in the entryway and even just this room is nicer and more expensive looking than anything Jungkook has ever owned.

He feels out of place but V’s sweet smile in front of him and the comforting grip on his hand helps him be more at ease.

There’s a thud that comes suddenly from above them and Jungkooks eyes widen at the confusion on V’s face.

“No one’s supposed to be home right now….” V seems to contemplate something before tugging Jungkook along with him to the front room. There’s couches and a piano which two sets of stairs lead into. “Hang out here for a minute okay Kookie? I’ll be right back.” V gives his hand one more squeeze before heading up the stairs on the right.

Jungkook takes the moment alone to really look around. The room is filled with warm light that compliments the wood floors, green walls and dark red curtains. Timeless paintings, almost like a museum, fill in the empty spaces and even though the sun’s gone down it’s almost like a piece of it lives and stays within this pack.

In the sudden silence he can pick out soft sounds of a harp being played, a beautiful melody that seems to travel right to him. All his attention narrows in solely on the instrument and the need to find it, to hear it more clearly, becoming the most important thing in this moment.

Something in him speaks up that he should wait for V and not just go strolling through the wolfs house, maybe it’s Yugyeom in his ear, but the only thoughts making it through the sudden fog is that he has to find the source of this music. His feet seem to have minds of their own as they take him through the house, feeling a wave of tiredness roll over him.

~~~

“Do you want to tell me why he’s here?” Jimin says a bit wildly. Tae pulls him further into their room, closes the door and motions for Jimin to keep quiet. Taehyung is grateful out of everyone in the pack it was Jimin that’s home and not…some of the others who could possibly be more upset.

“I’ve told all of you about him, what’s the problem?” Taehyung says, knowing exactly what the problem is.

“Well I think you left out stating the obvious and pretty important fact that he’s human Tae!” Jimin says and quiets his voice to a harsh whisper, looking behind them as simply mentioning a human would summon the rest of their pack.

“So? Why does that matter?” Taehyung says but his own words aren’t very confident. He avoided the fact for a reason…he just hoped that when the truth came out they just wouldn’t care? Yeah now that he thinks it over again it probably wasn’t the best way to go about it.

“Tae…” His name gets dragged out in a sigh.

“So he’s human, that changes nothing….” It shouldn’t.

“I know to wolves it isn’t the biggest deal but Yoongi’s gonna take one whiff after walking in and completely lose it.”

“Jungkook is nothing like those humans Yoongi’s dealt with. Just like we’re nothing like some savage packs. Like how you’re nothing like some of those bloodthirsty vamps out there….” Jimin shoulders drop as he tries to understand what’s going on in his mates brain. “Come on, you just have to meet him and your heart will absolutely melt.” Tae grabs Jimin’s small hands in his own, letting their fingers intertwine.

Jimin smiles at the action before rolling his eyes. “They’re gonna kill you Tae.” He says but the smile stays and their hands remain interlocked as they walk back to where Tae left Jungkook. They make it to the front room….only to find it empty.

“Jungkook?” Tae lets go of Jimin’s hand looking around as if Jungkook is simply hiding about to pop out from behind a couch. “Shit, I leave him for one minute and he’s already missing.”

“Well he couldn’t have left could he? So he’s got to be…” Jimin catches on to the soft sounds of a harp playing the same second Taehyung does and their eyes meet each other immediately. “Oh no.”

They rush to the harp room and Tae’s eyes land on Jungkooks sleeping form. He’s laying sideways on the couch dead asleep as if having fallen there and just stayed, oblivious to the world around him.

Tae kneels down next to the human as Jimin cuts off the enchantment on the harp leaving the room in silence.

“Who left that playing?” Taehyung asks, keeping his attention on the sleeping boy beneath him.

“Hobi hyung was having a rough night last night so Yoongi put the sleeping enchantment on it.” Jimin says almost sheepishly.

Tae sighs, looking at Jungkooks soft expression. The constant controlled features are smoothed out and he looks more at peace than Taehyung has seen him yet. He hates the thought of waking the kid up, knowing how much he needs the extra sleep…but he wants it to be Jungkooks choice to take a nap and not some spell that brings him down without his consent.

“Let’s take him downstairs, he can sleep off the rest of it in the living room.” Tae decides.

“I almost hate to wake him at all.” Jimin says, speaking his mates thoughts and fondly looking down at Jungkook.

“Is that so?” Tae smirks at the obvious affection in Jimins eyes.

Jimin starts, getting caught staring down at the human. “I can see why you’re so smitten.” He says almost grudgingly but the fond look returns to his face. “I admit he’s adorable.”

“Just wait until you see his eyes and hear his voice.”

Tae gently slides his arms underneath the human, cradling Jungkooks head against his chest and linking his arm underneath his legs to which the human doesn’t even twitch. He stands and feels his stomach drop, Jungkook is light, too light to be healthy.

“Tae?”

“He weighs almost nothing Jimin.” Whispering he tightens his grip. The two of them exchange looks.

“Then we’ll just have to help the little human out.” Jimin says and his smile says he accepts the human. Only Jungkook could get a vampires approval without even being awake.

“When will the others be home?”

“Probably not for hours. They went out for the night remember?” Jimin says as they make their way to their main room.

“And you didn’t go?”

“Had a headache.” Jimin shrugs, headaches being a regular occurrence for him. “The others offered to stay in with me but I could tell they were itching to go out and it wasn’t that bad anyways.” It eases Tae’s nerves a bit to hear.

They make it to their living room and Tae sets Jungkook down lightly on the large couch. The floor in front of it is deeper in the ground and cushion like, covered in pillows and blankets and perfect for pack nesting and cuddles. He decides the couch is a safer bet for the human right now. The lights are soft and warm and Tae feels his inner wolf beam at seeing Jungkook here.

“You think we should wake him now?” Jimin asks running his gaze over the humans features.

“He must be starving. He hasn’t eaten all day.”

“I’ll go heat up some food for him, don’t want to startle the little one with my presence quite yet.” Jimin ruffles Tae’s hair slightly. “Don’t be too smug about me liking him already Tae Tae, you still have to get through our sweet Yoongi.”

~~~

It takes entirely too much effort trying to wake Jungkook up, being a mix of Jungkook being a heavy sleeper and the sleeping lullaby still effecting him. The vampires are going to have to be really careful with their charms around the human.

“Jungkook-ah, wake up sweetheart.” Tae says for the fifth time, lightly shaking the younger. Jungkook’s eyes finally sleepily crack open and confusion lays over him like a blanket.

Tae runs a hand up and down Jungkooks arm and lets him take a minute to be more aware.

“Fell asleep?” Jungkook voice is rough as he rubs at his eyes before looking around at his unfamiliar surroundings.

“Yeah you must’ve been really tired bun.” Tae coos fondly helping Jungkook sit up, baffled at how precious he looks right now.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to.” Jungkook mumbles out blinking hard against the lights.

“Hey it’s not your fault, I’m glad you got a nap in and I’d love to let you sleep longer but you’re probably hungry.” Taehyung rubs Jungkooks back which does the opposite of what he wanted as the youngers eyes close again and his head begins to drop forward.

“Hey none of that bun. Come on, let’s get some food in that belly.” Tae rubs a bit more aggressively, almost as if trying to rub warmth all the way into Jungkooks bones. Jungkook stills slightly at the words and if Taehyung wasn’t touching him he would have missed it.

Puzzled at the change in the youngers demeanor, Tae shelves it away to think more about what it could mean later.

~~~

As promised a steaming cup of hot chocolate is set right in front of Jungkook. He smiles gratefully up at V and hopes the sugar will help wake him up a bit more.

He feels incredibly stupid at falling asleep like that. He knows his sleep schedule has been screwed up for almost a year now but to pass out the second he sat down? He felt like a child.

He cautiously takes a sip of the steaming liquid wincing slightly at the scorching heat to his tongue.

“Careful bun,” V’s Hand quickly guides the mug back to the table. “You don’t want to burn your tongue off before you can even taste it.” He blows a bit on the steam with a fond shake to his head at Jungkook’s eagerness.

The two of them sit in comfortable silence until their drinks are safe enough to take a sip. The tip of Jungkook’s tongue is definitely singed but the taste of chocolate explodes in his mouth. It’s rich and creamy and he swears it turns on the lights in his brain waking him fully.

“Now you’ve got nothing to worry about but one of my pack mates are here. And he would really love to meet you Kook.” V says slowly, leaning forward to gage the humans reaction.

Jungkook freezes, cup in the air halfway to his lips. “He’s here here? Like right now?”

V restrains a laugh at how big Jungkook’s doe eyes are, truly looking like an adorable deer in headlights. “Yeah and Jimin’s really excited to meet you. He’s making us some ramen right now and if you’re alright with moving to the kitchen we can go eat with him.”

V had mentioned that his pack was wanting to meet him but he didn’t realize so soon. Jungkook sets his mug down gently taking a breath. “Can I…go to the bathroom first?”

“Of course bun.” A comforting smile comes to V’s lips and he helps Jungkook up by his elbow. “I’ll show you where it is.” It makes sense that the human is going to be nervous at meeting another pack mate so out of the blue but his nerves should ease quickly after meeting sweet Jimin.

Jungkook looks at himself in the mirror once he’s alone in the bathroom. The decent sized bags under his eyes and rumpled hair doesn’t surprise him. How on earth V can handle even looking at him is a mystery.

Cold water to his face steadies his heart from an overactive metronome to somewhat more of a steady beat.

Jimin. Pack mate. Huh.

‘You don’t have to be nervous Kook. Your worth doesn’t depend on what others think, but even so how could they not like you? And if they don’t I’ll jump their asses.’ Yugyeom says, perched on the toilet lid.

Jungkook offers more of a grimace than a smile back at his friend. It all shouldn’t make him nervous…it really shouldn’t but he’s terrified. Meeting new people always makes his hands shake with nervousness and stomach swirl with uncertainty.

“Thanks Yug.” He chokes out and deciding it’s now or never he quickly opens the door to join a waiting V.

The first word that pops into his head the moment he sees Jimin is ethereal. From his almost white blonde hair, flawless skin and way that he simply holds himself…he looks like a glowing Angel.

“ Good morning little one. Do you like spice?” The man says with a sweet alluring voice.

Thrown off by how easily Jimin falls into teasing, seeing as it’s well past 7 pm, and being so casual Jungkook blushes at his own words stuttering out of his mouth.

“Uh y-yeah. I like spice.”

“Ah thank goodness, our Tae bear here can’t stand it.” Jimin smiles as if there isn’t a care in the world. “Glad you’re a person of good taste.”

V rolls his eyes but smiles at his mate, leading Jungkook to sit at the table. There’s something about Jimin that’s different. He doesn’t exactly emanate an ‘Alpha’ vibe…but there’s a different kind of power there. Jungkook can’t put his finger on it.

A steaming bowl of colorful ramen gets placed in front of him and even though his stomach flips at the thought of eating, he has to admit it looks delicious. And the smell? Heavenly.

Even with Jungkook’s first bite he immediately knows that it’s probably the best ramen he’s ever tasted. He feels his brows furrow as he chews, quickly realizing just how absolutely starving he is.

“You like it Kookie?” Tae gets out after a surprised laugh.

Jungkook can only hum back at him before taking another bite.

“Slow down there, it’s not going anywhere and we have plenty for you.”

Jimin nods vigorously while adding a bit more to Jungkook’s plate and the human politely bows in thanks.

Taehyung would gladly sit and simply watch the human eat but only grants himself glances now and then. It’s almost like a new life has filled the human. He must be really hungry…Tae wonders when the last time Jungkook had a home cooked meal like this was.

Jungkook only finishes about half his bowl before he slows down, almost as if too full but Taehyung knows that can’t possibly be the case.

Suddenly embarrassed the human lifts a hand to his ear and shyly looks up at the two in front of him.

“So uh…I wanted to ask. How many mates are in your pack?” Tae leans back from his own food refusing to eat while Jungkook isn’t.

“We’ll theres Jiminie here,” Tae rubs at Jimin’s shoulder, “and our pack leader is Jinnie. Then we’ve got Joon, Yoongi and Hobi. You’ll meet them all soon.”

“If any of them hear you purposefully avoiding honorifics to the new pup…” Jimin says playfully shaking off Tae’s grip.

“They would never punish me Kook, they love their Maknae too much.” He sends a wink over to the human who immediately feels a blush creep up his cheeks.

“How old are you sweetheart?” Jimin directs to the still blushing kid, who’s blush deepens at the pet name. Jimin coo’s at the adorable human, unable to hold himself back.

“I’m 21 Jimin-sii.” Jungkook fiddles with his hands in his lap.

“Well Tae Tae, looks like you’re not going to be the maknae for much longer. And please Kook, call me Hyung.”

~~~

“Thank you for dinner Jimin-sii…” at the raise of the man’s brow he quickly adds a “Jimin hyung.”

“Of course sweetheart. Please come back really soon okay? The other pack members will absolutely love you.” Jimin gives a hug to the younger and Jungkooks eyes widen comically before he melts into the contact.

“Come on Kookie, let’s take you home.” Tae can feel his inner wolf whine at the thought. Jungkook is safe and warm in their home. His belly is more full than it has most likely been in a while, he actually got some sleep and by his reaction to something as simple as a hug, the human seemed like he hadn’t had one in a while. Tae doesn’t want him to leave let alone let him out of his sight.

But he also doesn’t want to push the human too soon. Patience…right?

Once in the car and safely buckled in, Tae chuckles at Jungkook’s hands hidden and turned into sweater paws at the cold air around them. Not wanting to cross any boundaries but wanting to settle his reaching wolf inside, Tae lands a hesitant hand over Jungkook’s, rubbing his thumb over the fabric covering his knuckles.

“Jimin definitely loves you, just like I knew he would. Just like the others will.” Jungkook let’s his hair fall in front of his eyes at the notion.

“V-hyung why…I mean how come…” Jungkook’s obviously having trouble bringing his thoughts into words. His hands squirm under Tae’s grip.

“Take your time Kook.” Tae hopes he sounds encouraging enough.

Jungkook sighs and looks out the window before speaking again. “Why does your pack want to meet me so bad? Why…do you want to spend time with me? You don’t have to make up for the motorcycle incident or anything if that’s what you’ve been thinking. And I’m just a human not…anything special.”

Genuinely shocked at the words and sudden downcast aura surrounding Jungkook, Tae pulls out one of the youngers hands from a sweater paw and interlocks their fingers. Through their skin to skin contact Taehyung can feel the humans fluttering heartbeat. Poor thing is practically vibrating in his seat.

“How could I not?”

Jungkook finally let’s his eyes out of his curtained hair, looking to the wolf in surprise. “What?”

“How could I not want to spend time with you? How could I not want my mates to meet you Jungkook? I told you before, I really like you.”

“B-but I’m just a human and you’re…you’re already mated with a pack…I don’t understand.”

Tae wants to let it all out. Let it out that he believes they really are soulmates, tell Jungkook he wants to court him. Tell the sweet human everything he feels when he’s with him. He wants to so bad but he knows there’s a timing in it all and now? Regardless of how much he wishes it was, now is not the time. But Taehyung will wait patiently until it is.

How can Jungkook not see how truly precious he is?

“I’ll do everything to help you understand how special you are Jungkook. You’re someone who deserves to be loved and wanted. You are special, and you matter.”

Chapter Text

The stench of human was obvious to the whole pack the moment they stepped foot into their home. Instantly on edge Jin motioned his mates to stay behind him as he wandered in to where it was most powerful. Expecting some or any form of confrontation they were met with only Jimin perched on the kitchen counter with a steaming mug in his hand.

Feeling their somewhat buzzed auras going immediately on high alert them all through their bond Jimin expects them and most of all expects the confusion mix with a slight coloration in their eyes. Especially the bright purple to Yoongi’s. 

“Jimin ah, are you okay? Is there a human here?” Jin says softly, his eyes flitting over the room as if one could pop out any second.

”Taehyung-ah really picked the perfect time to leave…he’ll probably prefer to tell you himself but he did leave me here and he owes me too-“ 

“Jimin.” Yoongi interrupts him, eyes still ablaze. 

With a sigh Jimin hops off of the counter and sets his mug down. “It’s Jungkook, he’s human.” 

Silence meets him as his mates try to understand what it means for their pack. Namjoon looks between Jin and Yoongi, obviously knowing the topic is sensitive for the two vampires. 

“That’s not awful right? If our Tae likes him then-“ Hoseok begins cheerfully, but is stopped by a harsh laugh from Yoongi who without a word turns around straight for the door. 

“Yoongi wait!” Jimin passes through the others to reach out to the vampire. 

“If Taehyung wants to talk to me and explain what the hell he’s thinking, he knows where I’ll be.” Yoongi breaks from Jimins hold. “Of anyone I’d expect you to be smart about this Jimin.” The words sting as the rapper leaves their home more than likely heading to his studio. 

A comforting hand lands on Jimins nape. Jin places a hand on the younger cheek to bring his gaze from the door to look up at him. “He’s not mad at you Jimin-ah, we all know he has a hard time with it is all. Now can you please elaborate for us sweetheart?” The endearing name is said with such a tone that tells Jimin for sure that Taehyung is going to get an earful. 

~~~

Jungkook can feel a shift in the air as the front bell sounds and two guys walk in to the cafe. He’s back at his Wednesday morning shift and feeling surprisingly good. He’s gotten more sleep than he’s been able to get in a while and after his dinner with V, Jungkook’s been hearing from the wolf non stop. He honestly thought dinner would be the end of things but apparently V has other ideas, trying his best to see the human at least once every day. Jungkook’s mind still can’t wrap itself around what the wolf said to him, it’s somewhat impossible to believe.

The Im pack has somehow convinced him to stay a few more days at theirs even though almost all signs from the motorcycle accident gone and healed. Catching up with school between work shifts has been hell but he hasn’t spiraled yet.

The thing is the last weekend was too good…and he knows a drop is inevitable. Things never stay good for him and it’s only a matter of time before he slips back into the darkness of his own mind. Until then he’s trying to enjoy the unfamiliar feeling of having a lighter chest.

“Welcome!” He says cheerfully, and if his eyes linger on the two walking into the cafe he tries not to make it super obvious. They both emanate power, are tall, taller than Jungkook and obviously both very attractive. The one on the left has perfectly styled cocoa hair and deep brown eyes. His face looks sculpted and his outfit screams important. The blazer and glittering choker should be too much for a mid day coffee break but he somehow makes it work.

The one on the right has blonde dyed hair that’s styled up but pieces still fall perfectly onto his face. He’s dressed a little more casually but still looks put together in a dark turtle neck, coat and black jeans and holy frick thighs. Jungkook knows he’s blushing hardcore and directs his attention to the latte he’s making hoping with all his heart no one saw that just now. He’s not searching for anything but he knows an attractive guy when he sees one. But honestly what is wrong with him? Blushing like a school girl at every pretty face?

“What can I get for you today?” Jungkook brings himself to make eye contact with them as they reach the counter, stunned at the piercing gazes directed back at him. They have a domineering air about them that screams Alpha that even Jungkook as a human can sense.

“We’ll take a cold brew and an Americano please. Both larges.” The brunette says smiling easily at the human.

“Alright, anything else?” They both shake their heads at that and the Blonde smiles, showing off deep dimples. “Perfect, I’ll have that right out for you, what are the names on that?”

“Jin for the first one and Namjoon for the second.” The brunette, Jin he’s guessing, hands him his card to pay.

Jungkook notices the other eyeing his name tag and feels suddenly small under his gaze. The two of them find a nearby table and take a seat chatting quietly amongst themselves.

Jungkook makes the drinks, ignoring the persistent shaking to his hands, willing himself not to spill and make a fool of himself. Since there are no other customers coming in yet, he decides to take the drinks to them instead of having them come to the counter.

“Here you are, thanks for coming in today and I hope you enjoy.” He bows at the two of them and feels something warm inside at the praise he receives of it tasting good when they both take a sip. He’s about to go back behind the counter when Jin speaks up.

“So you’re Jungkook huh?” His name fits nicely in the others mouth and Jungkook freezes on the spot.

“I’m sorry have we met before?” He hopes the answer is no, not wanting to offend the other and also how could he ever forget meeting either one of them?

“Our Tae has been raving about you the past few days and I completely understand why. You’re all he talks about anymore.” Namjoon says, leaning back in his seat comfortably. Jungkook feels the heat raise to his cheeks again. They are V’s pack? Or Tae? Should he be calling him Tae? The thought leads to the conclusion of the two men in front of him indeed being werewolves.

Jungkook is no stranger to being surrounded by wolves especially with all his friends being wolves themselves, but the two in front of him ooze some kinda power that makes Jungkook nervous, especially the fact of them being V’s pack.

“We’ve been wanting to meet you but Taehyung’s been selfish keeping you to himself. I’m Jin and this is Namjoon, I’m guessing you’ve gathered as much.” Jins smile dazzles like his necklace.

“I’m uh…” not sure what to say to any of that…  Jungkook thankfully doesn’t have to say anything at being interrupted by someone roughly tapping his shoulder from behind.

“Is it much to ask to actually get served in this dump?” The man is much taller than Jungkook and someone he’s seen in the cafe a few times before, all memorable experiences but none of them good.

Jungkook bows immediately to the older, willing the blush to leave his cheeks. “I’m sorry Seonsaengnim, I’ll take your order right away.” He bows to Jin and Namjoon, choosing to file away what they said to think about much much later and makes his way behind the counter again.

“If you spent more time actually doing your job instead of flirting then maybe you’d get more customers.” Jungkook’s ears heat up and he apologizes again to the man. Out of the corner of his eye he sees Namjoon stand abruptly but stopped by Jins hand on his forearm.

He takes the mans order, ignoring a few of the rude remarks he makes under his breath and takes a moment to collect himself when the guy sits down across the cafe. He ordered five drinks, not exactly the speediest process and by the time Jungkook has finished and is bringing the drinks to the guy he’s practically emanating impatience.

“Took you long enough. Honestly is it that hard to get good help these days? It’s a wonder you still have your job.” He takes the drinks from Jungkook and stands to leave but walks right into a broad chest.

“Excuse you, but you can’t talk to him like that.” Namjoon says calmly, standing his ground. Jungkook badly wants to get between the two and stop whatever it is that’s happening.

‘Dang, two minutes in and he’s already your prince in shining tight jeans.’ Yugyeom says from his own table, enjoying the show.

Shut up. Jungkook practically screams in his mind at his friend, hoping their ‘telepathy’ will deliver the message.

“It’s fine, really. Please sir, just go.” Jungkook says but both parties pointedly ignore him. Looking around he sees they’ve caught the attention of the other few people in the cafe.

“I can talk to him however the hell I want, he’s just the help, I’m the customer.” The man jabs a stubby finger at Namjoon but the wolf doesn’t budge.

“You’re an asshole and he’s a human being. Now apologize.” Jungkook sees Jin shake his head from where he’s sitting, taking a sip of his coffee.

“What the hell did you call me?” The man drops his drinks at the table and brings a hand up to shove at the younger man. Namjoon’s arm comes up with incredible speed to grip the mans wrist, holding him in place. It’s obvious he’s pretty strong if the man blanching under the grip is anything to go by.

“I said apologize, before I make you.” Jungkook almost misses the flash of deep red glow in Namjoon’s eyes, shocking Jungkook in his place. He’s never seen a wolf with eyes with that deep of a red like that…

“Namjoon.” Jin says, warning and not moving from his seat, noticing Jungkooks discomfort. Namjoon visibly holds himself back, his grip releasing from the man as he regains his composure. The customer looks uncomfortable at this point and shoves past Jungkook and Namjoon both, bumping shoulders and cursing under his breath, calling him freak.

The bump to the shoulder, while it looks like it doesn’t effect Namjoon whatsoever, almost knocks Jungkook off his feet.

Namjoon takes a breath and looks noticeably calmer as his fisted hands relax.

“I’m sorry about that Jungkook.” Namjoon says sweetly, a stark contrast to how he was just moments ago. “Are you alright little one?” Jungkook nods blushing fiercely at the sudden pet name.

“Has he bothered you before?” Jin asks, standing to join them leaving his drink on the table.

“He comes into the cafe every now and then. It’s really no big deal though.”

“Is there anyone else working to help you?” Jungkook wants to say he prefers to work alone but even he knows that’s not really the truth.

“Uh not usually, we’re really understaffed but I can usually handle it. We don’t get too busy and taking the double shifts helps out with school fees…” Jungkook finishes weakly.

“Aigoo, you work double shifts?” Jin says, eyebrows furrowed.

Jungkook mentally smacks himself. Him and his big mouth. “Yeah but I offer so it’s no big deal.”

The two of them look troubled at that.

“What time do you get off Jungkook-ah?” Namjoon asks.

“I’m here till closing tonight.”

“Are you working tomorrow too?” He tilts his head. Jungkook nods at that, not sure where the other is going with this.

“Good to know.” Jin says with a charming smile, landing a soft hand on Jungkooks shoulder and warmth creeps up to the humans cheeks again. “We must get going, though I’d rather not. I have to say you live up to all the expectations Jungkook-ah.” The words shock Jungkook. Unless Jin means he lived up to the expectations of being a shy pushover and mess of a person then he has no clue what the man could mean.

“We’ll see you again soon, take good care of yourself.” Namjoon smiles, showing off those dimples and they both leave just as a few college students walk in.

Jungkooks heart beats a little faster than it should and feels like it’s about to jump out of his chest completely when he sees the 100,000 won left behind at their table.

~~~

Jin and Namjoon walk out of the cafe, mixed emotions running through them both.

“I think we can agree he is the most adorable pup ever. If I see him blush like that again it will literally be the death of me.” Jin says and Joon nods immediately. “I’m assuming we’re on the same page when I say it’s safe to feel worried for him. With what happened today and with what Tae’s told us, I badly want to wrap him up in a blanket and hide him away from the world.”

Namjoon chuckles although agreeing completely. “He definitely has some walls up. Doesn’t seem to be the type to ask for help, even though it’s obvious theres a lot holding him down. I don’t like that he works alone so much either.”

“When Jimin told us he was human I was skeptical and honestly upset but after meeting him…” they wait for the street light to go green. Jin hesitates, unable to find his words.

“I know.” Namjoon smiles feeling something close to a final puzzle piece inside him being filled when he’s next to the kid, just as Taehyung described his first meeting with the human had felt. “He certainly is going to be changing things for us all, that’s for sure.”

Jin smiles as if picturing what the future holds. “But it’s…it’s more than that. Like how Tae was talking about soul mates…there’s this pull i feel towards him.”

“I was thinking the same thing.” It’s possible to for a person to have more than one right?

They walk in their thoughts for a moment.

“You still have the scent of that guy from the cafe?” Namjoon asks finally to which Jin blanches, offended at him even hinting that Jin would lose it so quickly.

“Yah! Of course I do.”

“Let’s pay the man a visit then.”

Chapter Text

Yoongi’s reaction was no surprise to the pack. They would be stupid to think he wouldn’t want to get as far away from everything the moment he could.

Hoseok hesitates at the door to the rappers studio. They let him have his time alone after the whole “Jungkook is human” thing. But honestly? Hoseok is nervous not only for Yoongi but for the rest of them too. Humans have always been a sensitive topic for their pack and for the vampires especially.

Jin and Yoongi have been around a long time, longer than the rest of them and have dealt with being targeted countless times in the past by society and it’s fears of them. They’ve found, along with most other vampires, it’s easier just to hide and thankfully Yoongis contract with his company means only the director and select few managers know about him being a vampire.

It’s been a while since they’ve had really bad interactions but that doesn’t mean they aren’t still on alert.

Especially after what hell Yoongi’s been through.

Without gracing himself any more time to hesitate, Hobi types in the studios code that the whole pack had to wrestle from Yoongi to know. The rapper is prone to losing time and locking himself in there for days and not even realizing it. One of them has to go in to take care of him now and then, giving him a bag of blood and forcing him down sometimes away from his computer before he either drives himself to his ‘metaphorical’ grave or gives out from utter exhaustion.

“What are you doing here Hobi?” Hoseok expected a bit of a hostile attitude but the bite to the vampires words still make him sigh in sympathy.

“I know you don’t exactly sleep but even you need your rest.” Hoseok closes the door with a click behind him and cautiously approaches his turned away mate.

The room is dark and the light from the computer emanates a shadow casted behind Yoongi seeming to isolate him on the spot.

“I’ve been dealing with the shit going on with the company all week and you guys dragged me out to a bar when I needed to be here doing damage control. I’ve had enough ‘ rest ’.” The words are said with just as much attitude but the exhaustion is clear behind them.

Hoseok slowly crouches down next to Yoongis chair, turning the seat away from the monitor. The rapper drags his glaring eyes from the screen to look at his mate.

“I know that rattled you, getting home knowing a human had been there. Tae really should have told you, he messed up there but remember he’s just a pup. He’s a pup that’s falling in love and he doesn’t know everything you’ve had to deal with when it comes to humans.” Yoongis gaze softens as he looks away. “He wasn’t even part of our pack when all that stuff happened to you, but he loves you Yoongs, and he and the rest of us would never let anything happen to you.” Hobi softly brings Yoongis eyes to look back at him with a hand to his cheek. “You need to talk to him.”

All anger seems to drain out of Yoongi, leaving just a tired boy. “I know.” He sighs and buries his face in his hands. “I know things aren’t like they used to be.”

Hobi runs a hand through the rappers long hair, he’s suggested to the other getting a haircut soon but the vampire seems to like his longer locks these days. Hoseok chooses his next words carefully.

“But that doesn’t void what’s happened in the past. You have every right to be apprehensive and skeptical, hell, even mad. But love, you can’t let that stop you from moving forward or giving Jungkook a chance.” The words are said so softly and the look in Hoseoks eyes is so vulnerable and loving Yoongi can’t help but feel his resolve melt. “Promise me you’ll at least give him a chance, if not for Tae then yourself. Hmm?” His fingers dance across Yoongis nape and by the way the rapper leans into the touch Hobi knows he’s accepted the request.

Yoongi hesitates before nodding without a word, tiredness from the past few days seeming to bleed out of his face.

“Good. Now how about some cuddles hyung? I don’t know about you but I could really use a nap.” Hoseok reaches up to peck a light kiss onto Yoongis forehead and a scoff comes from the other.

“You know I don’t-“

Hobi cuts him off with an exaggerated yawn and Yoongi rolls his eyes, allowing the younger to drag him to the studios couch.

When the rapper was decorating the room all members of his pack helped him choose a cuddle worthy place for them to come and force their mate to take a well needed rest sometimes.

The two of them fit perfectly together in the space and Yoongi allows Hoseok to bring him to laying on his chest. The vampire is smaller than the rest of them outside of Jimin and it’s something Yoongi will only sometimes grudgingly accept, they all know he loves it for moments like this though. To be held and comforted. To be vulnerable, soft, taken care of and be loved though the rapper will deny with his very last breath.

~~~

Yoongi promised Hoseok he’d give the human a chance but that doesn’t mean he has to be happy about it. He knows he’s stubborn by nature but there’s something about his mate that can get him to agree to almost anything. Part of him wishes he told Hoseok off and refused any sort of contact with anyone outside his pack, but here he is scouting out the human himself.

His plan was to simply find the human, get a vibe, then get back to his studio as soon as possible. But here he is, sitting in the corner of a bar watching the human work. Yoongi had thought Jin said the human worked at a cafe but he must’ve gotten something mixed up seeing as Yoongi followed the scent here.

The bar is one of the more decent ones in town but still crappy. Most drunks don’t care as long as there’s plenty of alcohol to be served and enough lonely people seeking out another person to keep them company for the night.

Jungkook doesn’t seem comfortable but somewhat familiar with the space around him. He’s shy, that much is clear, and coming from someone who doesn’t ever sleep Yoongi can right off the bat tell that the human doesn’t either. The way the human carries himself is somewhat timid. He seems gentle and even Yoongi can’t deny he’s handsome. Its not often but when the human smiles Yoongi can feel something inside himself melt a bit. The smile doesn't reach the others eyes and Yoongi wonders what it would look like if it did.

Jungkook’s got an aura about him that drags the vampire in and Yoongi would rather die than admit it to the others. Something about the human intrigues the him, making Yoongi want to know more about him. Makes him want to forget about all other shitty humans.

It pisses him off.

~~~

“So when do you think he’ll ask for your number?” Jungkook’s coworker at the bar, Hwan, says under his breath. It’s been a pretty busy night and they haven’t had much breathing time between making drinks, cleaning tables and taking food orders. One of their coworkers called in with food poisoning too so, hello to another night of double shifts and closing up.

“What? Who?” Jungkook’s eyes dart around the room, across drunks and college students taking a night out.

“The freaking model in the corner. He’s been eyeing you ever since he came in and I can’t tell if he wants to take you on a date or eat you. Hard to tell by the look of him.” Hwan sends the younger a wink nodding his head to said corner.

Jungkook tries to subtlety drag his eyes over to the man and they make instant eye contact. Shivers race down Jungkook’s back at those piercing cat eyes seeming to burn right into his own. The man is dressed nicely in a blazer and his long hair is styled back. He sits with a sort of terrifying confidence that screams ‘don’t talk to me’.

‘Umm….he definitely looks like he wants to kill you.’ Yugeoum sends him an SOS look.

“I agree.” Jungkook feels his heart pick up at the words, suddenly way too self conscious of his own movements being watched.

“Byun! Need you in the back.” Their boss calls out and Hwan sends him a look.

“You best keep me posted when he asks for your number Kook-ah.” Hwan says with a last wink before going to the back for dish duty.

‘You sure you okay being left alone Kookie? That guy looks pretty dangerous.’ Yug’s tone is laced with obvious teasing.

“I’m not alone, I’ve got you.” Jungkook teases back under his breath.

Jungkook can feel that slightly unnerving gaze on him throughout his shift and he does his best to ignore it. It’s only when he hears a louder voice come from that corner that he pays full attention.

“Come on, a slut like you wouldn’t pass up an offer like this.” The words stop Jungkook in his movements, shocked at how repulsive and disrespectful people can be.

A large man, obviously mid life crisis age, stands looming above the stranger that’s been watching Jungkook. With the strangers body language it’s painfully obvious he wants that man to be anywhere but there.

“Back the hell off before I make you.” The stranger says back. There’s no emotion in his tone but it’s deadly enough that it’s clear he’s not one to be messed with.

The drunk is obviously too out of his mind to catch onto that though.

Jungkook sets his tray down quickly, wiping his hands and walking towards the two before he can second guess himself.

‘Woah JK what are you doing?’ Yugyeom says in a sing song voice, following his friend nervously.

“He’s a jerk.” Jungkook says, convincing himself not to turn back. 

‘Well yeah but he’s literally twice your size….’ His friend trails off, getting quieter as if he could catch the attention of the creep.

Walking closer reveals the older man still not giving up.

“A face like that, I know you’d be a fun-“

“Sir I have to ask you to leave.” Jungkook interrupts, not wanting to hear where the man was going with that.

The two of them look up at Jungkook, the drunk glares and the stranger raises an eyebrow.

“Why? He your plaything? Don’t worry I’ll take good care of him.” The man says with a smile that twists Jungkooks stomach. He refrains from taking a step back at the distinct smell of alcohol heavy on the man’s breath.

“I’m only asking once more.” Jungkook hates the slight waver that comes out with his voice.

“Get out of here kid.” The stranger says in a warning but with a hint of annoyance.

“You heard the whore, get out of here.” The drunk returns his attention to the stranger.

Jungkook looks over to the front, making eye contact to the bars bouncer and the man begins making his way over to them.

The backup gives Jungkook the last needed courage.

“You’re being a creep and staying where you’re obviously not wanted. If you don’t leave him alone now, our security will take you by force. It’s your choice if-“

A fist collides with Jungkooks face, throwing his balance off into the table behind him. Jungkook not only hears glass shattering but feels it bite into the skin on his hand.

The menacing form above him suddenly gets thrown into the nearby tables but the bouncer is still rushing towards them. Did the stranger just….throw a man twice his size like it was nothing? Looking up at him Jungkook swears the strangers eyes flicker purple.

The commotion sets off a domino effect in the bar, spilled drinks, yelling, and finally the bouncer takes the cursing, limping drunk out of there.

The stranger looks down with an expression that screams pity before offering a hand down to help Jungkook up. Gripping the outstretched hand Jungkook winces at the sting that flares up in his palm.  Dark blood drips heavily down his arm and his breath catches in his throat, drowning out the world for a moment.

A hand lands on his shoulder shocking him out of his stupor. “I said give me your other hand idiot.”

‘Wow gracious one isn’t he. Aren’t you glad you helped him? Also do you just attract all types of assholes? First the cafe dude and now this?’ Yug says, sarcasm dripping, crouched down next to the two of them.

Jungkook takes the strangers hand with his own that currently isn’t impaled with glass and the guy helps him up with another hand under his elbow.

“Jeon! Head on back to my office, there’s a first aid kit back there, then get back to your shift when you’re done kid.” Jungkook’s boss yells out before leaving to talk to the bouncer. He’s not exactly rude but pretty intense and Jungkook is still hesitant on if the man appreciates him as an employee or not. At the end of the day he gets paid so it doesn’t matter.

“Come on, I’ll help you out.” The stranger pulls at Jungkook’s elbow, which the human didn’t realize he was still holding tightly.

Passing through the back and waving off a concerned Hwan the two of them make it to the office and the stranger motions for Jungkook to sit down.

“You really don’t have to-“ Jungkook starts.

“Shut up.” The stranger cuts him off but without any bite.

Jungkook sits as the other takes off his blazer, just in a buttoned down shirt and rolls up his sleeves. After searching around for the first aid kit is finally found and the stranger begins taking out it’s contents, bringing out items to clean up the wound.

He sits across from Jungkook somewhat hesitantly and brings his hands up to the injured hand. As if the sight of blood is too much, the stranger closes his eyes and takes a breath before continuing, using tweezers to pick out the pieces of glass. 

Jungkook’s hand looks pretty gnarly, covered in blood and the cut must run deeply along his palm.

The strangers slender fingers cover over Jungkook’s skin and a warmth envelops the cut making some of the pain subside. He wipes over the blood again to reveal the cut half the size than it had felt.

“From the amount of blood there was I thought it’d be much bigger.” Jungkook says somewhat surprised and relieved.

“How does it feel?” The guy sprays some antiseptic on it, evoking a tiny wince from the human.

“Better, doesn’t sting as much. Maybe you’ve got the magic touch.” Jungkook says half heartedly but with a smirk.

‘Are you just a natural flirt these days Kook-ah?’ Yugyeom looks far too proud, perched up on the boss’s desk. 

The look the other gives him has the same energy of an eye roll without actually doing the motion. His eyes burn into Jungkooks, assessing and reading the human.

“Do you know who I am?” The stranger says suddenly, finishing cleaning Jungkook’s hand up and pulls out a bandage from the kit.

“Should I?” Jungkook’s words come out after a beat.

The man scoffs and looks down, a piece of his long styled hair falling onto his forehead.

“So you’re telling me you have no idea who I am but you were willing to get your ass kicked for me? I can’t tell if you’ve got guts or if you’re just stupid.” Jungkook can feel his cheeks heat up at the words.

“More like I don’t appreciate creeps who won’t stop when the answer is clearly no.” Jungkook says, letting his annoyance for the whole situation be clear in his voice. The guy finishes wrapping Jungkooks hand and looks up to the other with a hooded gaze as if trying to figure out the puzzle of a person in front of him.

“You might want to get that looked at. May need stitches.” He says after a moment and tosses the bloodied bandages. He stands and grabs his blazer from the chair. “And try not get get yourself killed by your stupidity yah?” The absence of the man’s fingers on his skin tingles and Jungkook can’t deny the strange pull he feels towards the other.

“A thank you would be nice.” Jungkook says, unable to stop his immature nature rearing it’s ugly head.

“A thank you? I had things covered.”

“Clearly. If ‘having things covered’ means letting that guy continuously harass you then ok you had it covered.” Jungkook says and Yugyeom laughs.

‘Wow I haven’t seen you have this much sass with anyone but me. Do you think he’s cute Koo?’ Yugyeom says and would be annoyingly poking his friend in the side if he could.

Jungkook resists the urge to flip him off.

“You’ve got quite the mouth on you.” The stranger says with a hardened glare before his expression softens with a scoff. “Only my mates dare to talk to me like that.”

Jungkook shrugs, not knowing what to say and if he should say sorry. Something about the guy makes him forget about holding back.

“Well…I’ve stayed here far longer than I wanted.” The stranger says at last.

After realizing Jungkook’s just sitting there like an idiot the human stands quickly before the other can leave. “At least tell me your name.”

The other hesitates a moment. “Suga.” He says with a smirk, as if his name itself is an inside joke.

“Thanks for…you know.” Jungkook lifts his bandaged hand. Maybe Yugyeom is right, Jungkook seems to be attracting all sorts of trouble these days. Motorcycle accidents, concussions, assholes…But he’s also attracting different kinds of people. Like Tae. “I’m Jungkook.” He says before the other can leave. 

“I know.”

And then he’s gone.

Chapter Text

The second time Jungkook sees Suga it’s at his job at the cafe. He’s locking up, it’s almost midnight and soft snowflakes pepper the world around them.

“You work two jobs?” The words almost startle the keys out of Jungkooks grip and he turns quickly to see the guy from the bar. Suga is dressed in all black from the ball cap over his head to the leather jacket over a turtle neck to the ripped jeans and sneakers. He looks a lot less intimidating and more casual than he did when they first met, making him seem…more human?

“Suga right?”

The man nods, and cocks an eyebrow as if asking his question again.

“Uh yeah, trying to make a little extra money.” Jungkook finishes locking the door, allowing his heart a moment to beat regularly again. He turns back to the other but Suga refuses to make eye contact, choosing to look down the block instead.

The street is empty except the occasional car. There’s some apartments nearby so It’d make sense if Suga was just walking home from his day.

“Do you live around here?” Jungkook asks, feeling somewhat uncomfortable with the silence.

“No.” The guy really isn’t offering much.

‘Well ain’t he the dark and mysterious type.’ Yugyeom leans against the cafe and makes a face.

“Well I uh…gotta head to my bus.” Jungkook knows with his track record he’s definitely going to be missing it if he waits any longer. The silence drags out uncomfortably between the two of them but Jungkook doesn’t feel quite right about leaving the man. “Would you like a muffin? My boss lets me take one when I close.” His grip on the brown paper bag loosens as he holds it out. Suga looks to the outstretched item with a frown that hasn’t left his face since he approached the younger.

‘Yes Jungkook, go ahead and give the man the only food you have access to. You do know your cupboards are empty right?’ Yugyeom says, sarcasm masking his deep worry.

“Aren’t you hungry?” Sugas eyes are piercing as they dart up.

“Not really, had a big lunch.” Jungkook says and by the look on Sugas face the man can somehow tell it’s a lie.

He takes the muffin anyways, opening up the bag to look inside scrunching his nose slightly. Jungkook shifts his weight from one foot to the other.

“Where’s your bus stop?” Suga says but seems somewhat uninterested in the answer.

“Down this street, not too far from here.”

“You know you really shouldn’t walk these streets alone, especially at night. You don’t know what kind of people will be out here kid.” He goes back to looking up and down the street as if waiting for a thug to pop out and prove his point.

“You’re one to talk.” The words come out more quipped than Jungkook meant and is rivaled against a look of disbelief from Suga, as if he’d dare imply the other would get himself into any trouble.

“I know how to take care of myself.” Suga says, folding his arms, crinkling the brown muffin bag.

“And who’s the one that stood up to the thug at the bar?”

“ Yah and who’s the one that got their ass beat for it?” There’s a spark of defiance in Sugas eyes and Jungkook has a feeling to drop it.

The man sighs. “Did you at least get your hand looked at?”

Honestly Jungkook was never planning on getting it checked on. “It’s fine, doesn’t need a check up.” He fingers at the bandages covering the cut.

‘Real convincing Kookie. You know you really should get it checked up.’ Yug quips.

Suga grunts disappointedly. “I’ll walk you to your stop.” He says as if it’s something he’s forced to do. Without another word he grips the bag in his hand and bushes past Jungkook, heading down the street leaving the younger no choice but to follow.

“How did you find me anyways? It can’t be a coincidence we see each other twice in just two days.” Even though the man is slightly shorter than Jungkook his strides are much faster, leaving the other behind and trying to quicken his pace.

“Happened to see you is all. You’re going to miss your bus if you don’t keep up.”

The rest of the walk in is silence and Yugyeom takes walking in front of the two but backwards, looking closely at Suga. ‘I wouldn’t let your guard down quite yet Kookie, but honestly? The guy seems pretty harmless. At least when it comes to you. Tough guy persona is all that is.’

Jungkook looks at Suga trying to see the other as Yug describes but only comes up with a stoic mask.

They miraculously make it to the stop just as Jungkook’s bus arrives and he quickly hops on. “Are you getting on too?” He asks. Suga stays on the sidewalk, one hand in his pocket while the other grips the muffin bag tightly.

“No.” Suga sighs. “Try to get some sleep kid. You look dead on your feet.”

The doors close and Jungkook watches Suga get smaller and smaller till they turn a corner.

~~~

Jungkook’s so deep in his thoughts he doesn’t realize the bus has been stopped in the middle of the street for a while now. Confusion leads him to looking forward to see the line of cars and flashing lights keeping them in place.

The only other passenger, an old woman, seems just as confused as she calls out to the driver.

“Why have we stopped? What’s going on?”

The next four words send ice through Jungkook’s veins.

“There’s been an accident.”

There’s been an accident.

There’s been an accident.

The first shallow breath leads to a second and sixth and next thing Jungkook’s knows he’s going head first into a panic attack.

It should’ve been you

He deserved life more

Dimly he can hear Yugyeom try to calm him down, tell him to take a breath but it’s all just static.

The old woman looks over.

He has to get out of here now. He presses the stop button with shaking hands.

“Please let me off.” His words are quiet but he repeats it enough for the doors to finally open.

Jungkook relishes in the cold air hitting his face as he stumbles out of the bus.

The driver calls out to him, asking if he’s alright.

The cold shocks his breathing and he stumbles through the streets, looking away from the cars and trying to shove everything back down.

You don’t deserve to feel anything but this

There’s no hesitation in going inside the moment he recognizes a bar, desperately needing some sort of release, something to dull all this pain.

There’s been an accident

~~~

Jungkook tries his best to sneak into the pack home without waking anyone but the world around him swirls a bit too much and the floor moves below leaving him too unstable as it threatens to swallow him whole. The whole trip back here is honestly a blur. He doesn’t care how he made it, he’s just happy he did.

Much like a parent Jackson’s there waiting for him.

“Where’ve you been Jungkook?” The words almost make the human jump straight out of his skin.

“Shit. Jackson you scared the crap out of me.” Jungkook grips a hand to his beating chest, stumbling into the wall beside him.

“Do you know what time it is?” Jackson sounds mad. 

“Do you know hyung?” Jungkook can’t help but say back with a giggle.

Jackson stands from the couch making his way over and giving the younger a confused once-over as if checking for injuries. Realization dawns once he notices the humans slight waver in his stance and glaze to his eyes. “Are you… drunk ?”

“No!” Jungkook says too quick and too defensive at the same time as Yugyeom says a very loud ‘yes’

Jungkook gives Yug a look of disbelief at being outed like that.

“Okay maybe just a little, I thought you’d be asleep.” Jungkook hopes his voice isn’t slurring as much as he thinks it is. He didn’t drink that much…right? Maybe he did, his tolerance to alcohol over the past year has gone up and he thinks that should concern him at least a little.

“Damit Jungkook.” Jackson looks even more like a parent as he rubs a tired hand down his face. “I’ve been worried sick and you haven’t been answering your phone. It’s freaking two am, I was about to call the cops to look for you, do you realize that? I even went by your apartment and called Taehyung.”

Jungkook faintly remembers getting a call before his phone died. It was about his second drink in.

He also faintly remembers not caring.

“Hyung I’m okay! So you don’t have’ta worry even a littlest bit okay?” Hopefully his words along with his smile is convincing enough.

“Getting drunk alone on a school night past midnight is not okay!” Jacksons voice is too loud and the words are too much for the youngers brain to follow.

A wave of dizziness hits the human making the wall slide out from his hand and next he’s falling face first into his hyungs broad chest.

“Damit Kook.” Jacksons arms quickly encompass the human, holding him up and stopping the youngers world from spinning so much.

It feels nice. Jackson is so warm. He loves hugs from his hyung, from all his hyungs.

“I was really worried about you.” Jacksons voice is a lot quieter now. “You should’ve called me.”

“Mmm…sorry.” Jungkook mumbles into the wolfs shirt. Being inside out of the cold, the warmth easily makes him sleepy. That combined with everything else especially drinking always makes him sleepy. Sometimes he becomes a giggly talkative drunk, but he’s grateful tonight is just sleepy numb drunk. It’s just what he wanted.

Jackson sighs and if Jungkook were in his right mind his anxiety would easily rise at the sound. He’s grateful for the alcohol in his veins right now.

“Come on let’s get you to bed.” Jackson steadies Jungkook with one arm before reaching down under his knees. “Ready? One, two, and…” the world spins and Jungkook’s legs kick in the air, searching for the ground. “three.”

Ach, dizzy . Jungkook scrunches his eyes, leaning his head into the others shoulder. Man, Jackson’s so strong. Strong and warm. Like a big teddy bear…

A small scoff comes from the wolf and it makes the younger realize he’s been talking out loud.

“Just going up the stairs okay?”

Jackson helps the human brush his teeth and take off his shoes and jeans before allowing the half asleep kid to collapse into bed.

At some point Jay B and Bam Bam come in giving Jungkook sleepy ruffles to his hair and Jackson promises to explain later.

Jackson sits on the side of the bed once the other leaves, brushing Jungkook’s messy bangs back for a moment.

“Jungkook,” Jackson begins somewhat hesitantly. “do you still see…is he still…” he stops in his words and the human knows what he’s going to ask. He’s extremely grateful when the wolf doesn’t continue. Jungkook isn’t ready to talk about that. To ever talk about that. Jackson cups the side of the youngers face. “We’re gonna talk in the morning alright? I’m not dropping it so easily pup.”

Through the haze of almost falling asleep Jungkook hopes his words come out somewhat coherently. “Sorry hyung. Couldn’t stop it.”

He couldn’t stop it.

Jacksons face contorts weirdly but through the daze Jungkook can’t quite catch what emotion it is. All he knows is he doesn’t like that look.

“You’re okay, get some rest Kook-ah. We’ll be here when you wake up.” Jackson pets back the youngers hair trying to lull the other to sleep.

“I miss him.” The words slip suddenly from Jungkook’s lips, almost as if without permission.

Jacksons hand falters.

“I know. I miss him too.”

Jungkook let’s sleep drag him down into nothingness.

~~~

A hangover is what Jungkook wakes up to and his phone ringing so loud it’s as if the device itself is in his brain.

Someone must’ve plugged it in last night and he frantically shuts it off to stop the alarm.

‘Rise and shine sweetheart’ Yugyeom says way too chipper. Jungkook opens his eyes to glare at the other but instead the soft morning light shoots pain up his head. Yugyeom chuckles at the others suffering.

‘Jackson’s really upset.’

Jungkook grunts.

’You should probably text Taehyung too.’

Crap, what does Tae think? He probably should text the wolf. 

He’s grateful for the silence that drags out until;

‘Jackson was gonna ask about me last night, you know.’ The sudden somber tone evokes a heavy sigh from the human.

Jungkook chances opening his eyes a slit to look at the other laying down next to him. “I know.”

Honestly most of the night is a messy blur but that he remembers.

‘I think you should talk to him Kook. He thinks that you don’t-‘ Jungkook cuts him off before he can continue.

“I know what he thinks Yug. Please I don’t want to talk about this right now.” The human buries his face into the blankets, hiding himself from taking this any further.

‘My prediction,’ Yugs voice goes back to his regular upbeat cheer, thankfully moving on. ‘Is that Jackson will chew you out for all of two seconds before comforting you like his baby. JB will probably cook you a massive breakfast and after teasing you Bam Bam and Mark will be all over you for cuddles. Sound about right?’ Jungkook raises his head again to see a genuine smile from Yugyeom. ‘They all care so much about you Jungkook. We , all care about you.’

Tears slip out of Jungkook’s eyes without warning and he dives his face back into the covers when a knock sounds at the door.

“Jungkook? You awake baby?”

If Jungkook stays still maybe he can let the rest of the morning pass pretending to be asleep. He doesn’t even know what time it is, if he’s missed class or not already.

The bed dips where Yugyeuom just was as someone sits.

“You alive in there Kookie?” It’s JB.

A warm hand comes to rub at his nape and if he were a wolf, the fingers would most likely rub at a scent gland to keep him calm. JB’s scent alone clams the human.

The humans grateful at times for his over sensitive ability to smell. Not only does it feel like he can connect better with the wolves but tell when they’re distressed as well. They use it to their advantage in helping calm him down from his anxiety sometimes too.

JB has this sweet earl grey scent to him that the younger has always loved.

The wolfs hand pulls down the covers slightly and brushes away the curtain of hair covering the humans face. Jungkook hopes the recent tears aren’t obvious.

“Aish baby, why are you crying.”

Ok they’re very obvious.

“I’m not.” Jungkook whispers as soft fingers wipe away the tear streaks.

“Jackson said you had a bit of a rough night.” JB’s words start up something in Jungkook again and a new wave of emotion hits. “Oh baby.” JB crawls further onto the bed to hug the human and thumb away his tears. He relishes in the closeness until Jungkook can calm down.

Jungkook’s head is killing him and it’s as if JB can read his mind when he reaches over to the nightstand, grabbing a water glass.

The wolf gives him a few more minutes to compose himself and take some sips of the drink.

“Do you want to talk about it?” JB’s hand is gentle as he tucks some hair behind the humans ear.

Jungkook shakes head quickly.

“That’s okay. How about we go on downstairs for a quiet morning huh?” JB says so softly as if any louder could crack something in Jungkook. Maybe it could.

It takes him a moment to nod his head before the other helps him out of bed, drink another sip of water and wash his face before heading downstairs.

Mark and Jackson are in the kitchen and heavy steps thunder down the stairs as Bam Bam joins behind them.

The brightness of the room and sound of the morning all stab roughly at the humans head. Sensing the others discomfort JB leads him to the table where he can lay his head down.

He can feel heavy looks from the others and how something has shifted in the air since he entered the room. He should’ve stayed in bed. He’s not ready for any of the conversations he knows the others will want to have. 

“Here Kook, this should help settle your stomach.”

A steaming bowl is placed gently next to him and though the broth is probably incredibly bland, the smell makes the humans stomach roll.

“Thanks hyung.” The light morning chatter of the morning resumes in the kitchen. 

“I emailed your teachers and let them know you’re not gonna be in class today.” Jackson says, sitting next to you younger with a cup of tea. 

“You didn’t…have to do that.” 

“Well I don’t know what you want me to do when you show up at two am so drunk you can’t take your own shoes off.” Jackson pointedly looks at the human who freezes in place. 

The rest of the room stills at the blatant calling out.

”Jackson I…” Jungkooks heart constricts. 

“Hyung…” JB says hesitantly.

”Do you realize just how scared I was for you? How much you worry me? Us? All the time?” Jackson continues.

“I don’t mean to I just…” Jungkooks head pounds in search of a way to make this right.

“If you were our mate we wouldn’t have to worry about this. If you were part of our bond we could find you in an instant Jungkook.” Jackson’s tone has more worry than anger in it, but the emotions are too overwhelming.

The human digs his nails into his palms. 

“Please, hyung, I don’t want to talk about this.” His stomach rolls with every word. 

The older sighs. “Then when will we talk about it? Because any time it’s brought up you run away or deflect.”

Jungkook swallows down the rising nausea.

’Deep breaths Kook. You know he hates seeing you struggle. It’s his instinct for him to want you a park of the pack because of how much he cares about you. He’s just angry because he can’t fully protect you.’ Yug says, trying to defuse the situation. 

”I can’t.” 

“You can’t what? Can’t talk about this or be a part of our pack?” Jackson says, voice slightly rising.

“Jackson maybe we should-“ Bam Bam begins but JB holds him back, trusting the Alpha to not go too far. 

“I can’t…” Jungkook repeats, unable to find any other words to make this right. 

Jackson sighs. “What happened last night?”

Jungkook thinks through the muddled thoughts racing around his mind. “Nothing hyung. It doesn’t even matter anymore.”

”I don’t mean to be hard on you pup I just…“ Jackson really sees Jungkook then, noticing the rising anxiety and panic in the humans eyes. “Kook-ah I’m sorry I just-“

”I can’t be here anymore.” Jungkook cuts the wolf off and the words escape his lips before he even realizes it. “I think I need some time on my own for a while hyung.” He hates every syllable that comes out of his mouth. 

I need you. I don’t want to be alone.

“What?”

The human bows to the other, feeling his own emotions shut down before they can spill over and stands from the table. 

“Thank you for your help hyungs. I’m sorry about last night but I think I need to think things through alone.”

Please don’t let me go.

“Jungkook wait! This doesn’t…you’re not making any sense. Please just wait-“ Jackson stands with him and the others go on full alert, panic enveloping their features. They just got their pup back safe and now he wants to leave again?

“I can’t stay here any longer, I’m going to go insane if I do and you can’t force me anymore.” Jungkook turns but doesn’t miss the pain smacked look on his hyungs face. Jackson follows the other as Jungkook starts taking the stairs to get his things.

“Jungkook please, just take a moment…” The pain laced in Jackson voice tears at the younger. 

“Jungkook wait!” Mark calls out among the others. 

“What brought this on Jungkook? Did we do something wrong?” JB says right on Jackson’s heels. 

That’s the problem, they’ve done absolutely nothing wrong. It’s Jungkook that’s the problem. 

He’s caused enough problems for all of them. He’s stayed here far too long. 

He can’t take Yugyeoms place. He has no right to be here.

Chapter Text

“Why didn’t you tell me you visited Jungkook?” Tae scrambles from his spot on the couch, running up to the older wolf walking into the kitchen.

“We were…going to tell you.” Namjoon fumbles, moving forward to the pantry.

“I had to find out through Jungkook days after that you and Jin hyung visited him. Kookie was flustered to say the least, it was actually pretty cute.” Tae smiles down at his phone as a responding text comes in from said human.

🐰 Kookie 💜 : Gotta get to work. Can we talk later?

Taehyung: Of course Kookie, make sure to keep warm and get some lunch in you!

Last night when he got a worried call from Jackson about Jungkook being missing, Tae thought he would lose his mind. The hour and a half of waiting and frantically waking Jimin up, deep in his anxiety, was hell. The only thing keeping the wolf from searching the streets for his friend was Jimin keeping him in place with reassurances and that Jackson would call again if he were really scared.

Finally sometime after 2 Jackson texted him, letting him know that Jungkook was back with them safe. No details given, nothing. Of course Taehyung couldn’t sleep even a moment when they got back home going crazy with worry for him.

Jungkook texted in the morning as if nothing had happened…that concerns the wolf the most. How easy it is for Jungkook to pretend everything is fine. How many times has he already done that?

“I understand why you’ve been acting like a giddy school girl since you met him.” Namjoon pulls Tae’s attention up with a finger to his chin, motioning to the texts. The older can’t help his own smile as he opens up a bag of chips.

“Of course, you now know how endearing he is. How did Jin like him?” Tae leans onto the counter.

“As expected, he already wants Jungkook to move in.” Namjoon says around a full mouth and shakes his head fondly.

“Yah! Are you trying to ruin your appetite?” Jin, silent as ever, comes up from behind Namjoon snatching the snack. “And of course I want Jungkook to move in, poor thing seems like he hasn’t eaten properly in weeks!”

Tae smiles at his mates, something warm filling him inside at their immediate acceptance of the human.

“Hey I wanna talk about Jungkookie too!” Jimin comes into the kitchen with Hoseok right on his heels. “He’s such a cutie I think I could die.”

“Wait, you’ve all met Jungkook except for me?” Hobi says, distress clearly written on his face.

Jin gets closer to the younger petting his head softly. “Don’t worry love, you’ll get your chance.”

“What about dinner?” Jimin says brightly. “We could invite him and have him properly meet everyone.”

While Tae, Jin and Namjoon jump at the idea Hoseok holds himself back taking a breath.

“What’s wrong Hyung?” Jimin catches on quickly.

“It’s Yoongi. He’s not taking it well and, Tae honey, you really need to talk to him about this all.” The wolf says.

Tae feels the happy bubble inside immediately deflate. He knows he’s screwed up. It kills him that he’s done this to his hyung but the fear of the vampire disapproving of the human won out over the possibility of him accepting Jungkook.

Before Taehyung can even answer, said vampire comes into the room obviously having heard them just talking about him. It’s been days since Yoongi has left for his studio so seeing him actually in their pack home sets all the wolves at ease once again.

“Taehyung, can we talk in my room?” Yoongi says without hesitation to which the younger nods, anxiety for the conversation filling him. The others send him encouraging smiles as he follows his hyung upstairs into his room.

What if Yoongi says no? Gets mad? What if Yoongi refuses to ever give Jungkook any chance at all. What if-

“I met him.” Those three words stops all of Taehyungs thoughts completely.

“You…what?”

Yoongi sighs and folds his arms. “I met Jungkook. Twice actually and while I’m pissed you didn’t tell me in the first place…I understand. It doesn’t mean I’m willing to completely let this kid into our pack or agree to any kind of courting yet but…I understand Tae.” He says, not making eye contact.

The breath the wolf was holding releases in relief but his chest constricts in worry. “I’m so sorry hyung, I never should’ve tried to keep it from you or lie. I should’ve told you right away and I should’ve thought about how you’d feel especially with everything you’ve been through in your past and I promise to never-“ Yoongi quickly brings his hands up to Taehyungs face, halting the younger in his rambling words.

“Tae I just told you I understand didn’t I? It’s okay. I appreciate the apology pup.” Yoongi says, features softening and his thumbs lightly rubbing Taes cheekbones. “I know you get anxious over these things but you don’t have to about this anymore okay? I’m going to give Jungkook a chance but it will take me time.”

“Of course hyung, whatever you need.” Taehyung brings his hands up to grip Yoongis, relishing in the moment of physical contact with the vampire before the elder pulls away clearing his throat.

“So don’t worry about me anymore okay? Invite the kid over for dinner or whatever and I’ll sort through my shit on my own.” Yoongi says with a soft smile.

“You never have to sort through it alone hyung.” Taehyung reaches out, needing that contact again and grabbing the vampires hand, smiling when Yoongi squeezes his hand back.

“I know Tae. Also just warning you, Jungkook thinks my name is Suga and he may have gotten into a bar fight because of me.”

“Wait, what?!?”

~~~

Jungkook feels like crap.

The looks that were on the others faces as Jungkook grabbed his things and left are burned into his vision. He thought maybe he’d feel some sort of relief, some sense of accomplishment of finally giving them an out, finally giving in to what his guilt has been feeding him for months now…but Jungkook feels like crap.

Going through classes feels nothing more than just going through the motions and thinking about going back to his cold dark apartment alone makes tears threaten to rise to the surface. Part of him feels so torn, wanting to run to the Im pack begging for them to take him back. The warm bed and comfort of the others is something he shouldn’t have gotten used to again. Seeing a glimmer of what could be only makes his reality that much harder to return to.

The thing holding him back the most is that guilt. Every time he looks at their faces, watches movies with them or has dinner at their table, every time he gets a damn hug he just remembers who’s not there anymore. He remembers the empty place at the dinner table and the spot on the couch that will never be taken again. He can see it in the others, how much they miss Yugyeom, and Jungkook is just a reminder of their pain.

No matter how many times Yug tries to convince him otherwise, the human will forever allow his guilt to overrule his friends words. Because how could it not be the truth if he feels this way?

Jungkooks class got let out early so he has over an hour until his shift starts. Not wanting to stay on campus any longer today with his thoughts the better option seems to just start his shift at the cafe early.

“Jungkook!”

Tae’s suddenly there, running up from the school parking lot as if bringing the sunshine with him right on his back. His hair flows with each step and his eyes crinkle with a smile that seems reserved just for the human standing dumbly in front of him.

Jungkook feels too dark for this bright person in front of him, too dirty in front of the other. He pulls at the sleeves of his hoodie and readjusts the straps of his backpack.

“Hyung, what are you doing here?”

“Hey Kookie.” Tae catches his breath. “I wanted to personally invite you to dinner with my pack tomorrow night if you can? And also because I wanted to chance the possibility of you being free now for a cup of coffee.” Tae gives that smile again that even on Jungkook’s worst day he couldn’t say no to. It brings back butterflies to his stomach. “I wanted to see you.”

“Um, yeah. Yeah hyung I just have work and um…”

“You don’t have to give me an answer now, at least for the dinner part. But coffee? Looks like you got out of class early too.”

Jungkook feels the tightness in his chest ease up at only needing to make one decision now. “Sure hyung. Coffee sounds good.”

“Perfect!” Tae links his arm through the humans. “My car is just in the lot.”

The walk is short and Taehyung chats brightly about his morning as their shoes crunch the snow beneath them. When they reach the car Taehyung opens the door for him but Jungkook stands there dumbly, anxiety creeping up and thoughts threatening to arise.

‘It’s ok Kook. You can get in the car. You’ve driven with Tae before remember?’ Yugyeoms voice is small.

“You alright there Kookie?”

Jungkook hates how this feeling comes and goes as it pleases. One day he’ll hop in a vehicle without a blink of an eye but another day it feels as if the world could end if he gets inside. The worst days are the ones where it triggers a panic attack just at the thought of driving. He’s grateful those days have been far fewer than the others.

“Sweetheart?”

Jungkook blinks through his thoughts and shakes his head to be rid of them.

“Fine hyung.” He says before clenching his teeth and getting inside. He’ll probably need to take the bus to work after, or walk even.

When Tae gets in, Jungkook tries not to make eye contact as the other starts the car and turns up the heat.

“Is it alright if I hold your hand?” The words startle the younger. How can Tae just say that so casually?

Not wanting to say something dumb, Jungkook just nods his head finally looking at Tae. The wolf gingerly grips Jungkook’s hands in both of his, rubbing his warm thumb over the chilled skin on the back of his knuckles.

“Are you okay Jungkook?” The question steals Jungkook’s breath. “I can tell somethings bothering you.”

Dang those deep eyes and sensitive caring nature. Jungkook almost wishes Taehyung wouldn’t care so much or notice him at all.

“Yeah I uh…I got in a disagreement with my hyungs.” Jungkook decides on saying.

“Oh bun…do you want to talk about it?”

Jungkook doesn’t have to think about his answer for this. What’s he gonna say? ‘I had a panic attack on the bus last night, got drunk, then stormed out of the Im’s house like a toddler having a dramatic tantrum.’ Yeah he’s gonna keep his mouth shut. “No I don’t want to talk about it.” He says quickly.

“Okay we don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. At least tell me if you’re in danger or not.”  Jungkook almost laughs, thinking Tae must obviously be joking, but the serious look on the wolfs face speaks only true concern. It makes sense the other would ask, having only met the Im pack once and seeing Jacksons angry protective wolf making an appearance.

“Of course not hyung.”

“Ok I just wanted to make sure baby.” And there Tae goes again with the sweet names and making Jungkook heat up at the cheeks.

Taehyung puts the car into reverse and they make their way to a coffee shop, the others hand intertwined with Jungkook’s the whole way there.

~~~

Jungkook imagines the way his coffee twirls in the mug is what the inside of his stomach would look like if he could see it.

“Are you not thirsty?” Taehyung says after taking a sip of his own mug.

“Not really hyung.” Jungkook whispers, too tired and nauseous to to fake anything.

Taehyung sits back, staring at the other for a moment. His eyes dance across Jungkooks features and the human fears he’s going to see the cracks, see everything he tries so desperately to hide.

“Do you know one of the things I love about you Kookie?”

Jungkook would’ve choked on his drink if he were actually drinking it. His eyes widen and words, any words at all in question of the wolf freeze in his mouth.

“You have the sweetest eyes.” Tae says, a smile softening his features even further. “I know you’ve been to hell and back, I can see at least a fragment of it in you and I hope one day you feel comfortable enough to share some of that with me. You’ve been to hell but yet your eyes are still so soft and caring.”

Jungkooks breath catches and his heart beats viciously, begging to shoot straight out of his chest.

“You’ve got this beautiful heart of gold Jungkook. You’re beautiful.” The last words stutter out, as if Tae tried to hold himself from saying it but the words came out on their own, needing to be heard. Taehyung laughs, suddenly shy or embarrassed. It’s a look Jungkook has never seen on the other. “You really are and it makes me incredibly happy and nervous and giddy just thinking about you.” He looks the shocked human in the eyes. “You never have to tell me anything you don’t want to, but I will always listen when you do.”

Every dirty part of Jungkook screams to be heard. Every hateful thought about himself, every scar that begs to be picked. It’s almost constant that those voices are there…but something about the way Taehyung looks at him when he says the words “you’re beautiful” quiet them down somehow. For just a moment he doesn’t feel like this human trash in front of the other. He’s not those words and thoughts in his head but he’s someone else entirely. Just for a moment he can be what Tae sees.

Jungkook holds on tightly to it because he knows this moment will pass. He wants to remember this feeling because in an hour, hell even a minute his mind will refuse to believe every single word but by some sort of miracle or blessing in this moment, he believes it.

“How do you do that?” Jungkook finds himself saying.

“Do what bun?”

“Say all that? How do you just say it?” Jungkook grips the warm mug in his hands. “You say these things and it does something to me. I could never actually believe it but when you say it but somehow I want to. Somehow it feels real and…hyung, you’re too good for me. If you haven’t noticed I’m a mess and I’m only going to screw things over for you.” Taehyung sits silently though the younger stuttering and rambling and each second longer that he looks at the human like that is another second that Jungkook falls utterly more in love with the man. “You’re too good to waste your time on me.”

Taehyung sits and stares longer. Jungkook could practically see the cogs turning in the wolfs head. Part of Jungkook wishes Tae would just walk out and make everything easier…but the other part of him, the earning part wants him to stay so desperately.

“I don’t know your secrets, but I’ll pick up the pieces…if you’ll let me.” Tae pulls Jungkooks hands away from his mug into his. “And if love is a waste of time, I want to waste it all on you.”

A smile of disbelief faces itself on Jungkook and he scoffs, eyes watering at the flood of emotions surrounding him. “That was so cheesy hyung.” Laughing feels so foreign but so right that Tae is the reason.

Tae laughs with him, wiping away a stray tear that escapes down Jungkooks cheek.

“I can’t help it, you do this to me bun.”

The human allows himself to relish in the contact, in the words, in Tae. His mind is definitely going to be screwed up with thoughts and emotions later but now? He feels okay.

“So dinner…”

Chapter Text

It took a lot of convincing but Jungkook finally got Taehyung to agree to let the human come to their mansion all on his own. He feels terrible about lying that one of his hyungs would drop him off but Jungkook didn’t want to have to try and get into a vehicle in front of the wolf again. Based on how he’s been feeling on the topic the last few days he knows a full on panic attack would emerge, ruining the whole night.

So Jungkook is walking instead. Bundled up in his coat as the wind bites at his cheeks. He didn’t realize just how long it would take him to reach Tae’s home and he hopes by the time he gets there he won’t be a total icicle.

‘Come on Kook, just call Tae to come get you.’ Yug says, the wind not even slightly effecting him.

“First off no. I’m not going to call him after I said I was getting a ride. And second, it can’t be much longer, I don’t want to make him drive just for me.”

Yugyeom sighs. ‘I’m tired of walking Kook. Come on.’

Jungkook sends him a questioning look that his friend reciprocates.

‘Fine. What do you think they’ll make? The feast he brought you for your picnic at that butterfly cafe looked pretty good.’

Jungkook hums at that. That food was delicious but Tae did bring so much. Jungkook worries that there will be twice the amount tonight. Hopefully he won’t get too much attention from the others on the matter.

A text from Jackson comes in, chiming from the humans pocket.

Jackson Hyung: Hey Kookie. I hope you’re able to get plenty of rest through all your studies and work. Get some good food in you tonight.

A twist of guilt hits Jungkook right in the stomach. How would Jackson feel to know Jungkook ditched them all but is with Tae and his pack tonight? The thought and guilt and feelings all stop the human in his steps.

The Im pack has been respecting his space and giving him time. They’ve checked in on him the past few days through text and have left dinner on his doorstop. No matter what Jungkook says or does he thinks the wolves will still do that. Still be there even though Jungkook was so rude.

‘Kook you gotta stop overthinking man.’ Yug starts. ‘If you need space then you have every right to take it. They aren’t mad at you for that. And you’re alright to spend time with Tae and his pack, you’re not betraying anyone and you’re especially not betraying me by being with the Im’s either. I want you to be happy living your life. With a heavy emphasis on living .’

Jungkook looks at his friend. Really looks at him and feels something inside lift a bit. The pressure on his chest raises and he can finally get a real breath in.

“When did you become a personal guru? You were never this smart before.” Jungkook teases with a smirk.

‘I’ll pretend to not be offended by your stupid question. For your information I’ve always been this smart, you just couldn’t handle it before. Now come on! They’re waiting for you and it’ll do them no good if you freeze yourself to death before you even get a chance to see what they have for dessert.’

“Right. Because thats what’s really important here.”

‘Exactly! You’re finally getting what the point of all this is. Dessert!’

Jungkook chuckles along with Yugyeom. His friend smiles, happy to see a brighter look on the humans face.

It’s about ten more minutes walking when Jungkook sees a parked car on the side of the road with someone lounging on top of it.

‘Hey look Jungkook, you found your match! Someone who’s crazy enough to also be out in this cold like you.’

Jungkook waves the other off, hastening his steps to reach the stranger. He catches his breath and slows down, trying not to startle the guy and that’s when he gets a good look at him.

The man is propped up against the windshield of his black Benz with his arms crossed behind his head. He almost looks peaceful with the snow falling gently around him. There’s a hint of a smile on his handsome features and his side profile is no joke.

Jungkook clears his throat. “Are you alright?”

The man jumps into a seated position, startled by the sudden words. “Ah, you just stopped my heart kid.” He clutches a hand to his chest dramatically and takes a few breaths.

Jungkook’s cheeks heat up and he bows to the other in apology. “I’m sorry.”

The man drops his act and smiles at the other. With the way the stranger looks at him and smiles like that, the cold winds around them seem to warm just slightly. “It’s alright cutie. What are you doing all the way out here?”

Jungkook’s face remains most likely beet red at the name. “I’m heading to a friends house. Do you need help? I can call a mechanic for you.”

“Ah you’re such a sweetheart!” The guy says, leaping off the car and boy does he have more energy and life in his pinky than Jungkook has in his whole body. “My mate is already on his way to come get me. We would be so happy to give you a ride too!”

“It’s okay, I don’t want to be a bother.” Jungkook quickly raises his hands and shakes them to oppose.

“Nonsense! You were nice enough to come check on me, the least I can do is get you out of the cold.”

“It’s alright Ajusshi.” Jungkook bows his head again, wanting to stay away from the very thing he’s walking to avoid.

“Oh please call me hyung! Hobi hyung!” He says with a smile to which Jungkook gives a nod. “So who’s this friend of yours you’re visiting? Maybe I know them?”

“It’s actually a pack and-“

“Oh my mate is here!” The sound of tires on the snow gets louder until a white sleek car a bit bigger than the one broken down next to them pulls up.

And because it’s just Jungkook’s luck, of course Namjoon is the driver.

‘Goodness Koo, how the heck do you keep putting yourself into these kinds of situations.’ Yugyeom says with a shake of his head but the smile on his face says he’s loving every minute of the drama.

Namjoon steps out and heavy confusion lays on him at seeing the human stand before him.

“Jungkook? What are you doing here?”

The stranger next to him stills. “Wait, you’re Jungkook? You’re even more precious than I imagined! Can we keep him?” Hobi says gripping onto Jungkook’s arm and bounces up and down a few times.

Namjoon chuckles at the excitement then his expression changes quickly to one of concern.

“I thought you told Tae that you were getting a ride Kook-ah.” Namjoon says, more of a statement than a question, eyebrows furrowed in concern.

The humans heart stutters, being caught in his obvious lie.

‘Someone’s in trouble.’ Yug just has to butt in and say.

“Uh last minute they couldn’t Namjoon-shii.” Jungkook says with a bow to the other.

The wolf raises an eyebrow and his expression remains at a state of concern with a bit of chastising.

The range of emotions the human is able to evoke from the wolf in just a minute is almost humorous.

“It’s far too cold for you to be walking out here. You should have called us.” He says obviously wanting to get further into it. Instead he looks to Hobi. “And you should’ve been waiting inside your car, not on top of it. Aigo.” He rubs two fingers at the bridge of his nose completing the perfect picture of a dad scolding his children.

Hobi sends Jungkook a wink and the human can tell the two of them are going to get along.

Jungkook shifts from foot to foot, looking to Namjoon again. “Please don’t tell Taehyung about this.” He says softly.

Namjoon sighs. “You know being out in the cold like this could make you sick Jungkook. You have to take better care of your health.”

The human almost scoffs at that. If the other knew just how little he cared about his health.

“Ah give the cutie a break! He came to my rescue and I’m so glad to finally meet you Kookie. It’s not fair I had to wait this long!” Hobi easily uses the nickname, and dang it is that smile contagious. Jungkook finds his own lips forming a smile to join him.

“Alright, let’s get you both home warmed up and out of this mess.” Namjoon opens the car door and explains that a mechanic is on their way for the car. Namjoon dusts the two of them of the snow that’s accumulated on top of their shoulders and hair before Hobi hops in the back of the vehicle no problem. Jungkook is left there with an open door for the front seat held before him. Namjoon smiles and nods his head in expectancy waiting.

Then it all comes crashing down within seconds. His feet remain stuck in their place. He’s frozen.

Don’t freak out. Don’t be weak. It’s just a car. Just a few miles. It’s safe. It’s fine.

“ Jungkook?” Namjoon questions and a confused look from Hobi comes from inside.

‘I’m right here Kookie.’ Yug says from behind him.

The humans hands are already shaking and even though a cold chill is running through his body from being outside for so long a sweat breaks out. He takes a hesitant step forward before freezing again.

Just get in the damn car.

“Are you alright Jungkook?”

Jungkook’s breathing picks up on it’s own and he digs his nails into his palms, hidden under his coat sleeves, to try and ground himself back to the present.

Should’ve been you.

“Joon…” Jungkook distantly hears Hoseok say.

He’s fine.

“Jungkook, is it alright if I touch you?” Namjoon says and he feels miles away. The human hesitantly nods his head and a warm hand comes to rest on his shoulder, almost cradling his nape. Calming waves roll off the wolf and the contact pulls Jungkook back to himself.

He shakes his head to clear his vision to see two very concerned worried wolves looking right back at him.

“Are you back with us Jungkook?” Namjoons thumb rubs slightly at the humans exposed skin of his neck.

He still feels incredibly shaky and dizzy and like his whole world is about to collapse but he’s grounded now. One simple touch did so much more in a few seconds than inflicting pain on himself for an hour ever could.

Jungkook takes a breath thanking the heavens that he was able to be pulled back from a bad panic attack.

“Yeah-“ his voice comes out rough and he clears his throat before trying again. “Yeah I’m okay hyung. I just don’t…” he looks back inside and sees Hobi’s expression try to lighten. “I don’t like cars.” He admits and feels so small in front of the two of them. He shrinks under their attention.

“Oh…” Namjoon says, understanding flooding into the one word. The wolf looks back and forth between the human and the car and his pack mate.

Jungkook closes his eyes. He waits for them to laugh or scoff or tell him to suck it up. Tell him he’s being childish and ridiculous. Those would all be appropriate responses to him being unreasonable and difficult and-

A gentle hand caresses his cheek.

“What do you want to do? The house is probably a five minute drive from here but if you don’t want to get in we won’t force you to. We also won’t look down on you if you can’t. If you want to walk, hyung will walk with you okay?” Namjoons voice is so soft, his words are slow and his touch so sweet. It seems almost out of character by how big the man is. Jungkook has seen how the wolf can get mad like before at the jerk at the cafe but that wolf is not even recognizable in the kind eyes in front of him.

Jungkook revels in the touch and moment to think without pressure.

“I’m…I’m okay.” He finally says and moves forward, placing a hand on the outside of the vehicle.

“Only if you’re sure baby. There’s no pressure.” Namjoon says and Hobi nods in support. Baby . Goodness how has this pack just worked their way into his life like this. How are they breaking down some of his walls.

“I’m sure.” He says, then quickly adds. “I can’t sit in the front hyung.” He eyes the open passenger seat as if it could swallow him whole.

“Of course, come on. It’s nice and warm for you inside.” Namjoon gingerly helps the human into the back next to Hobi and Jungkook quickly closes his eyes once his skin hits the leather. His seatbelt gets buckled for him.

Doors close and Namjoon is seated in the drivers seat but Jungkook tries not to think about it. He grips at the seat tightly and takes a stuttering breath in.

“Hey Jungkookie, do you want to know something silly about Namjoon ah?” Hobi says suddenly and it replaces the nonsense rushing through Jungkook’s mind. He opens his eyes and sees a waiting Namjoon. The human nods, letting the other know he can start driving before looking at the wolf sitting beside him.

Hobi smiles and Jungkook realizes just how much that smile looks like a heart.

“So actually I’m his hyung, and yeah I know he’s bigger and stronger but he will forever be my baby.”

Namjoon chuckles and slowly pulls out from the side of the road. He has both hands on the wheel and attention solely on what is in front of him, trusting his hyung to take care of the human in the back.

“Namjoon loves plants. Like he’s got this crazy obsession for them and I swear he treats them as if they’re his children.” Hobi whispers at the end like it’s a secret.

“I do not.” Namjoon says but there’s a smile in his tone.

Jungkook keeps his eyes locked onto Hobi, ignoring the world moving around him.

“You so do hyung! We once went on a pack vacation and he brought, get this, a bonsai tree with him!” Hoseok continues. He reaches forward, not missing a beat, and brushes aside the humans fringe before letting his hand drop down on top of Jungkook’s. “And don’t get me started on the others…”

Everything in Jungkook wants to panic, scream, jump out of the car, spiral into darkness…but…as the other goes on and on, exposing his pack mates quirks and habits Jungkook’s heart settles and he finds himself smiling. In almost no time at all they are pulling into the mansions front driveway.

~~~

“Jungkookie! You’re finally here!” Jimin jumps forward pulling the human into a comforting hug the moment they’re through the front doors.

“Lucky for us we arrived right at the same time. Wouldn’t want the little one to wait outside longer than he had to.” Namjoon says, sending the human a wink. Jungkook feels gratitude flood through him and he smiles a thank you back at him.

Namjoon ruffles Jungkook’s hair, ridding him of that last few snowflakes still in his brown locks.“I bet you’re hungry sweetheart, let’s not let the food get cold now.” Namjoon motions for the rest of them to follow him into the kitchen.

Hoseok sends him a happy look before bounding after the wolf, obviously hungry.

Jimin helps the human with his coat then takes to warming him up by rubbing up and down his arms. Jungkook knows his face must be flushed going by how adamant Jimin seems at wanting to warm him up.

“Thanks hyung.” He says, knowing the redness to his cheeks once again is there not just from the weather.

Footsteps thud through the entrance and a familiar excited voice calls out. “Is that my Jungkookie I hear?” Tae rounds the corner and a smile beams onto his face at the sight of the other. He plows into the human with a warm embrace. “I thought I’d go crazy if I had to wait any longer to see you.”

Jimin shakes his head fondly. “Tae has been like an excited pup waiting at the door for his owner to come home.” Jungkooks eyes widen at the imagery.

“Jimin’s exaggerating.” Taehyung waves off and links his arm with the humans, walking them both further into the welcoming home. Jimin links onto Jungkooks other side.

“If our Tae had an actual tail right now I guarantee it would be wagging so fast-“

“Anyways…” Tae interrupts and it brings out a chuckle from the other two. “I hope you’re hungry Kook-ah because Jin hyung made enough food for all of Korea.”

Walking into the kitchen proves him to be right. The room smells incredible and the table is already lined up with plates of steaming dishes.

“Wow.” Is all Jungkook can say.

‘Well said’ Yugyeom adds.

“Jungkookie!” Jin says from the stove and sends a massive smile his way. He somehow looks more stunning than Jungkook remembers, even while wearing an apron that says “no bitchin’ in my kitchen”.

“Hi Jin Hyung.” Jungkook bows back to the eldest.

“Ah such a polite pup. I’m so glad you could come tonight, we’ve been a little anxious to see you. Why don’t you all get settled, the jjigae needs just another minute.” He motions to the table where Hobi is already sitting and Namjoon takes a seat at the head of the table.

Taehyung pulls a chair out for Jungkook with a smile and they both sit down, the human in between Jimin and Tae.

The food in front of him smells insanely good and Jungkook can actually feel his appetite rising.

It’s only a few more minutes until Jin comes with the last dish and after setting it onto the table he drops a kiss to the top of Jungkook’s head before taking a seat between Namjoon and Hobi.

Taehyung must notice Jungkook’s burning ears because he rubs the back of his finger at one and murmurs “cutie.”

“Dig in everyone! If you wait any longer I’ll be offended.” Jin says with mock exasperation. “And make sure to save some for Yoongi, silly thing spent way too much time at the studio again.”

”I still think we should try changing the code on his studio door. Or lock him in his room to get some proper rest for once.” Jimin says and Jungkook can’t tell if the other is joking or not. The hums of agreement seem to give him his answer.

They all fill their plates and Jungkook is left, not much to his choice, with literally a pile of food in front of him.

“Jin and Namjoon hyung told us you work at the cutest little cafe huh Kookie?” Hobi asks around a mouth full of ramen.

Jungkook swallows his own food. “Yeah I’ve been working there for a few months.” Jungkook still is in shock from the massive tip the others left him. He’s also incredibly grateful for it having helped pay for rent.

“We’ll have to come see our Kookie in action!” Jimin says giving him a stary smile.

They continue to chat about random things and Jungkook finds a longing feeling in his chest at how at home they all are with each other.

Jimin says something silly and Namjoon gives him a sweet pat on the head, Tae talks about his day and the others give him all the attention in the world, Jin rants about something at work and the rest sympathize after teasing. They complement each other, they belong together, that much is so clear within seconds of seeing them together.

Jungkook also notices the extra pieces of meat Jin puts on his own plate, or the way that Jimin keeps his glass filled. How Tae puts his arm around the back of the humans chair, how Hobi does everything he can to get a smile out of the him and how Namjoon pays such close attention when Jungkook speaks. How they all care so much.

It’s nice.

Jungkook tunes into Hobi talking about “the kids” and instantly feels bad about having zoned out for a moment. The wolf must notice his look of confusion.

“I’m a dance instructor and have my own studio in town.” Hobi says obviously excited about the fact. “There’s this class of twelve year olds that are keeping me on my toes for sure.”

“That’s amazing hyung.” Jungkook says and feels something akin to admiration fill him for the other.

“I know that look in your eye!” Hobi says, excited enough he almost flys off his seat only to be held down by Jin next to him. “You’re a dancer too aren’t you?”

Jungkook starts, caught like a child with their hand in the cookie jar.

“I’m not really a dancer.” He turns his attention to the still full plate beneath him. “I used to dance,” he continues “and it used to be my major but I moved onto art instead.” Another way of saying Jungkook lost his passion for it. Lost the energy for it. “I miss it.” He’s surprised enough to find himself saying.

“I knew it! You have that dancer vibe to you and you look like you’ve got a great body for it too.” Hobi says and Jungkook blushes, fiddling with his sleeves.

“Hoseoks studio is open for anyone and I guarantee your hyung would be more than happy to let you use it after hours even.” Jin suggests and Hobi actually jumps from his seat this time.

“Of course! I can even give you an extra key or lessons whenever you want!”

The whole tables attention is on him, eyes looking to see his reaction. Looking at him, his body, everything. They can see him and they’re waiting. He wants to completely hide in his oversized clothes.

“Th-thanks hyung.”

“Ahh our little Jungkookie is a dancer. You and I will have to go to hyungs studio together!” Jimin says and while there’s fondness in his tone Jungkook only feels something ugly inside. Dread? Disappointment in himself? He can’t pin it down but he knows he needs to get out and get a moment to collect himself.

He stands suddenly, chair scraping a bit on the floor and blushing hard at the confused looks he receives from every member at the table. He bows immediately before mumbling something about needing the bathroom.

Tae stands up with him to walk him the way and before letting Jungkook race to the open door of the empty wash room there’s a gentle grip onto his sleeve.

“Are you okay Jungkook?” Tae’s brown eyes fill up with warmth and concern. It brings the human as much comfort as the cup of hot chocolate did his first time here.

“Fine hyung. I’ll be right out.” Jungkook says with a smile he hopes is encouraging and moves away from the others grasp. Once the bathroom door is shut and his view of the other is covered he can hear footsteps retreat back into the dining room.

Looking in the mirror reveals his ears to be as red as they feel.

‘Careful there Kook, blush any more and you’ll start a fire.’ Yugyeom says, leaning against the opposite wall.

“I know!” Jungkook can’t help but say back, coving said ears with his hands. He has blushed more just today than he has his whole life it seems.

‘It’s been a while since you’ve danced.’

Jungkook looks Yugyeom in the eye and sighs. “I know.” He says more calmly this time.

Jungkook used to love dancing. He would fill almost every day with it and it was his escape. It was also something he would do with Yugyeom. Something he would do before the accident.

He allows his body a moment of weakness and slides down to the floor. Why did just the thought and mention of dance bring him panic like that? Why can’t he be normal and make it through one freaking dinner? Why does he have to be so screwed up in the head?

Jungkook knows he’s been taking too much time in here and Tae will probably be coming by to check on him if he’s any longer. He’s too much in his head.

Shoving all the rising feelings down he stands somewhat shakily, takes one last look at himself and one last breath before opening the door to head back.

What he expected to be an empty hallway is not so empty as a startled person stands right before him. Jungkook recognizes him immediately and intense confusion floods through him at the sight. 

“Suga? What are you…doing here?” Jungkook says almost in a whisper, as if the guy broke into the home unannounced.

“I live here.” He says with a shrug then continues on his way down the hall.

“Wait! What? You live here? Are you…”

“Part of Tae’s pack? Yeah.” The other finishes for him turning quickly but Jungkook still catches his smirk.

“I don’t…” Of course Suga knew who Jungkook was when they met. It’s just the kind of thing the other would do, pretend and string the human along in confusion. Of course with everything that’s already happened with this whole pack this should come as no surprise.

“Come on Kook ah, you gonna stay here in this hallway all night or are you coming?”

Chapter Text

Hey everyone!

This isn’t an official chapter but I wanted to ask you a question. Coming up there will be a couple of chapters sort of like flashbacks of when Jungkook first started seeing Yugyeom and the time right after the accident. Would you all prefer those chapters to be included in this story or as a separate story all together? Like a prequel of some sort. It would give me more comfortable space to make that as long as I wanted and still continue on with the current story as well. Or I can just include it in the current story as flashbacks.

What are your thoughts?

Also I have a lot of the future chapters already written, it’s just getting the in between parts done so hopefully I’ll be able to post more regularly. Along with the other stories on my page, specifically the other two BTS fan fiction I’ve written. I’m not abandoning any of them! Haha I just need to finish a few parts here and there. Forgive me 🙏

Anyways let me know! Love you all!

Chapter Text

“Looks like you picked up a straggler on the way back!” Jin says with a laugh when Suga walks in with Jungkook right behind him. “Come sit down Yoongi, we’ve got your food ready for you.” 

Suga, or should he say Yoongi, takes a seat next to Jin as Jungkook takes his next to Taehyung. 

“You’re Yoongi?” Jungkook can’t help the bite in his own words. 

The guy accepts his bowl of food with a slight smirk. “Yep.” 

‘I don’t know if I wanna smack him or kiss him.’ Yugyeom says a bit too loudly, giving said man a look. 

“What?” Jungkook says, mostly out of shock looking at Yug and gets six set of eyes looking back at him in concern. “Uh sorry, just thought your name was something else…” He looks to Yoongi for help.

“I guess I have one of those faces.” Yoongi says and Jungkook can feel Taes eyes dart between the two. 

The rest of dinner is somewhat awkward mostly on Jungkooks end. What’s strange, but in hindsight shouldn’t be strange, is that Yoongi is so at ease here with the others. This man that seemed like such a lone wolf in the bar and closed off the times Jungkook had spoken to him seems so…at home? He’s still more on the quiet side but at ease. He fits so well in this pack just like each of the others and while before Jungkook felt like it was something he could belong to, now it’s like they truly are complete without him. 

The human thinks that’s it when they clear the table and finish cleaning up. He fully expects Taehyung to offer to walk him to the door now but instead the wolf rubs a hand at the base of the humans back. 

“Do you prefer popcorn or candy?” Tae asks with shining eyes. 

Shocked and unconsciously leaning into the wolfs touch, Jungkook stumbles over his words. “Uh what?” 

“There’s ice cream too!” Tae adds on, then notices the others continuous confusion. “Well of course you get to choose the movie and snack Jungkookie.” He says with a smile. 

~~~

They end up sprawled out on the couch that surprisingly fits them all with room to spare. Jungkook was fine with just popcorn but ended up with all assortments of candy held out to him as well. They even said they could grab ice cream for him in seconds if he wanted. 

When picking a movie, Jungkook had hesitantly asked if the rest of them liked marvel and couldn’t help the excitement at them wanting to watch his favorite. Namjoon and Jimin have both seen it before but the others were oblivious to the wonders of Iron Man. Tae seems excited about it all, well mostly that Jungkook agreed to stay, and Hoseok and Jin took to bickering about story plots and characters of the movie. The two of them fit right in with Tony Starks excellent snarkiness. 

The one that remains quiet is Yoongi, who seems both content and intrigued. It leaves Jungkook wanting to know what’s going on in that head of his. Why did he lie about who he is? Did Yoongi already know who Jungkook was when they met? He itches to ask a million questions. 

Being in this environment makes him think of the Ims. The comfort, the bickering, the way it feels like home. The fact that its not the Ims but a whole other pack settles a heavy guilt within the human. It steals his appetite and leaves him with a feeling that he deserved to spend the night home alone in his cold apartment. 

“I’m really glad you’re here.” Tae interrupts the humans thoughts. On the screen Tony tries out his blasters for the first time, destroying the windows in his studio. Hoseok’s asleep next to Jungkook and almost falling to lay completely on the human, Jin is bickering with Jimin now joining him, Namjoon is still picking up all the popcorn he spilled a few minutes ago and Tae is looking at Jungkook as if he is holding the world. That look, his words…Jungkook allows it to melt his guilt, just for tonight. 

He wonders how many times being with Taehyung will give him another night away from everything he’s been dealing with. How many more times Taehyung will help him get away from his own mind. 

Jungkook imagines what his night would be like if he didn’t come and shivers involuntarily. 

“Are you cold?” Tae jumps, reaching for another blanket that Jimin quickly passes to him, knocking over Namjoons popcorn again in the process. Tae wraps the younger up and holds stars in his eyes. “Is that better?” 

Jungkook feels a smile come to his face. “I’m really glad I came too hyung.” 

~~~

Jungkooks stomach twists as soon as the movie is over. Namjoon joined Hoseok in falling asleep and Jungkook doesn’t know what he’s going to do. Walking home in the dark seemed a lot less scary a few hours ago and the only two people who know about…his issue with cars are asleep. 

“Ok I have to admit…that movie was even better the second time seeing it.” Jimin says from the floor and places his chin on Jungkooks knee. About halfway through the film Jimin had mumbled about how it wasn’t fair ‘Hobi gets to sit next to Kookie and he isn’t even awake!’ so he settled with sitting at the humans feet. He now smiles up at Jungkook with such a sweet look.  

“I agree, I can even see myself watching it again.” Tae gives Jungkook a smirk and pointed look. 

Jin turns the tv off and shakes his head at the sleeping members mumbling. “Ah they work so hard.” He then checks his watch. “Alright sweetheart, it’s pretty late. Is Taehyung ah going to be driving you home?” 

It takes a moment for the human to realize he’s speaking to him. Sweetheart. “Uh I um…” He looks to Tae for help. Shit, he really doesn’t think that he can handle a car right now but he doesn’t want to over-welcome his stay. “I can find my way home no problem.” He finishes sounding just as sure as he feels. 

“Why don’t you stay the night Kookie? And then I can drive you back to your apartment in the morning.” Tae proves once again how easy it is for him to say stuff like this. 

“Yes! Kookie we can have a total sleepover.” Jimin says, rising up to his knees in excitement. From the corner of his eye Jungkook can see Yoongi get up from the couch and leave the room without a word. 

“Hold on you two, we have to make sure Jungkook is comfortable with it.” Jin says and eyes his silent partner leaving. 

“I uh…don’t want to intrude.” Jungkook says weakly. 

“Of course not! I’d have you stay forever if you could.” Taehyung says innocently, reminding Jungkook of a kid never wanting their friend to leave. 

“Lets start with one night Tae Tae.” Jin ruffles Taehyungs hair with a shake of his head. “Only if you want to.” Jin squats down next to a smiling Jimin to be more at Jungkooks eye level, brown eyes warm. “It is completely your choice, especially if you’re sleepy you shouldn’t be going out this late. We have a spare room that can be all yours and you’re not intruding whatsoever. We would love it if you stayed.” His smile is so welcoming and comforting and Jungkook can’t blame himself for nodding okay. 

~~~

Jungkook had slept alone in the guest room as they all thought they would give him his privacy…at least for his first night here. They had to practically drag Taehyung from being too clingy too soon, especially since he is an aggressive cuddler when he sleeps. 

Jungkook had early classes to get to and Namjoon had to get to work around the same time so he ended up taking the sweet human, after of course Jin forced the Jungkook to take a breakfast and packed lunch to go. 

Taehyung smiles, thinking about how adorable Jungkook looked this morning. His hair was a bit messed from sleeping, baggy pajamas they lent him rumpled and an ease to his demeanor that isn’t there when he’s fully awake. His eyes were hazy and smile easy…Taehyung realizes he loves that Jungkook.

There’s a sweetness in the air as the rest of them get their breakfast, all clearly thinking about said human. 

“You know when Kookie smiles, like really smiles he kinda looks like…a…” Hoseok starts, pulling his partners’ sleepy attention. 

“A bunny?” Jin says with a knowing smirk, cuddled up to his steaming cup of coffee. 

“That’s what I’m as going to say! The cutest little bunny!” Jimin adds on, getting giddy at the thought of it. 

“I can’t handle how cute he is.” Taehyung murmurs, laying his head down onto Jimins lap and practically purrs at the small hands going through his nest of hair. 

Yoongi grunts. 

“What’s up your pants this morning sweetie?” Jin says far too cheery and awake. Yoongi just glares back at him, eyes open at slits. “You also seemed a bit too snarky to the pup yesterday. Care to explain?” Only Jin can challenge the other like that this early. 

Taehyung decides to help his partner out and sits up. “Yoongi met Jungkook before last night and told him a fake name and everything.” He smiles at the glare he gets in return.

“Wait what? Hyung?” Hobi jumps, almost flipping his plate. 

“It’s whatever.” Yoongi growls.

“No, not whatever, were you planning on telling us this?” Jin asks and the other simply shrugs his shoulders. 

“Is it awful that I wanted to check him out before letting him into our house again?” Yoongi says, looking down at his coffee. 

Though Taehyung had already talked to Yoongi about it, he feels a pang of guilt at having let Jungkook in their home without full approval. The sting of possibility of Yoongi being upset with him still…hurts. Jimin rubs a subtle hand on the others back. 

Yoongi stands abruptly. “I have to get to work, we’re still trying to figure out the shit that’s been going on and I’ve taken far too much time off.”

“One night isn’t even enough time off hyung, you’re overworking yourself.” Hobi says, receiving a soft look from the vampire. 

“Until it’s all fixed I’m gonna keep working Hoba.” Some of the bite is lost in his voice now. “I gotta go.” He goes without another word, leaving the rest of them wondering how to get past that hard shell of his when he gets like this. 

“Care to explain further Tae?” Jin says, pulling out his parent card. 

The younger sighs. “Yoongi told me that he met Jungkook a couple of times. I guess he just wanted to check him out before he met the rest of you. You know how hyung is. And about humans especially…” Tae tampers off once he feels Jin gets it. The elder rubs a hand at his forehead. 

“Hopefully he didn’t scare Jungkook too much…I hope that Yoongi ah will warm up a bit more. I do think that the company is putting extra stress onto him that really isn’t helping.” Jin takes his dish to the sink.

“He seems so dragged down hyung.” Jimin pouts, playing with the hair at Taehyungs nape. 

“I think this calls for some true pampering tonight.” Hobi says and by the look on his face they know his plan that most likely includes face masks and yoga could either go impossibly wrong or wonderfully right. 

Chapter Text

Standing with his neck craned up, willing his feet to move forward, Jungkook gapes at the size of the building before him.

When Hobi had invited him to come check out his dance studio he had said modestly that it wasn’t anything too fancy. What a liar. 

“Come on Kook! If you think this is nice, just wait until you see the inside.” Tae pulls at the youngers elbow, surging him forward to the entrance and up the stairs. 

Since having dinner with Taes pack Jungkook has found himself more comfortable with them all. Excluding Yoongi of course who has yet to shown his face to the human again. Jungkook isn’t quite sure how he feels about the whole thing.

Walking inside Jungkook catches his breath looking at the painted walls and bright lights, it definitely has Hobi written all over the decorations and this is just the front room. It looks like hip hop threw up in here but somehow it works really well. 

“Alright Kookie, I’m gonna go make sure Hobi is decent before letting you come in. Hang tight alright?” Tae brings him to one of the front room sofas and rushes inside the main dance room. 

Jungkooks eyes roam the place. There’s a wall of competition trophies which Jungkook remembers that Hobi said he teaches young kids and teenagers, so they must do competitions too. There’s a dressing room along with three different dancing studios it looks like,. It’s any dancers dream and absolutely massive. 

‘How you just happen to fall into the laps of the richest pack out there is beyond my understanding.’ Yugyeom says, getting comfy on the sofa next to the human. 

Jungkook agrees, still astonished with how they are weaving themselves into his life. 

In just the past two weeks Jimin has taken him out for tea after class, Jin’s dropped by his work at the cafe a couple of times, Namjoon has joined him in studying at the library (even though Jungkook knows for a fact Namjoon has no real reason or need to be there) and by this point Jungkook and Tae have had 4 FaceTime calls outside of their coffee dates and walks outside and now here they are checking out Hobis dance studio that the other has been begging Jungkook to come to ever since they had dinner all those nights ago. 

The amount of contact he’s had with them all compared to the ignored texts and dropped off food from the IMs…it makes him sick to his stomach. 

Jungkook is at least grateful his issues with cars has been tampered down enough lately and while he’s with the others he’s able to choke down the food they give him even though it doesn’t stay in long after he’s home again. It feels like a bandaid has been placed over his cracks lately but he’s worried about when the dam will break through again. 

Homework has been keeping him occupied as well, especially with midterms right around the corner that he is no where near close to ready for, not to mention the shifts at work keeping him on his toes.

‘Stop brooding Kookie, these are all good things you’ve got going for you. Just you being here is a miracle in itself! You haven’t danced in ages!’ 

“I’m not brooding, I’m thinking. There’s a difference. And I’m not even here to dance today, just to check things out.” Jungkook replies, slumping back in his seat with a pout.

‘No one is gonna stop you if you want to dance though Kook…’ Yup says with a sly smile. 

“Why don’t you get up there and dance then huh?” 

‘Don’t mind if I do!’ Yup jumps up from the couch and makes a beeline for the door Tae disappeared behind. 

“Wait Yug!” Jungkook lunges after him only to almost run into Tae as he comes back into the room. 

“Woah sorry I didn’t mean to take so long!” Tae says with a slight chuckle stabilizing the human after toppling into the wolfs chest. “A little eager to see inside?” Tae grabs the humans hand after he’s standing on his own alright and pulls him into the room. 

Inside takes Jungkooks breath away. The wooden dance floor is clean and spotless and the wall directly in front of them isn’t really a wall but massive windows that looks out at the city ahead of them. 

This room has a similar vibe to the entrance. The painted brick walls have some toned down colors to what was outside and what stands out the most is the graffiti that says HOPE. There’s massive speakers lining the side walls along with colored lights lining the whole room and behind him is a wall of mirrors. Once again, a dancers dream studio. 

Hobi stands by the speakers in a t-shirt and sweats already looking like he’s been practicing all day. 

“My Kookie!” He bounds forward excitedly before colliding with the human in a hug. 

“Ah hyung! You’re all gross and sweaty!” Tae pulls him off the younger and Hobi gives him a sheepish smile. 

“Sorry I had two classes today! Welcome to my domain!” Hobi holds his arms out with a smile just as wide. He seems so comfortable here, it’s definitely his space and his world they’ve come into. “What do you think Kookie?” 

“It’s amazing hyung!” Jungkook says without a beat, looking around again to admire the safe space. 

“It’s gonna be even more spectacular once we get you dancing in here.” Hobi smiles at him with that smile that looks like a heart. 

Jungkook smiles back, it’s hard not to around the guy. 

“Would you want to Kookie?” Tae asks tentatively, grabbing the humans hand and tilting his head to look into the youngers eyes. 

Jungkook hesitates, the spark in him wants to say yes more than anything and his limbs itch to move.

“How about we just put on some music and enjoy the space in here?” Hobi says gently, moving towards the speakers where his phone is still plugged into. “I can put on something chill and we just enjoy it!” He allows his excitement fill his words. 

“Okay.” Jungkook finds himself saying and sees from the corner of his eye Yugyeom fist pumping into the air.

Hobi puts some music on, Tae takes Jungkooks backpack and the human is left staring right at his refection. 

His baggy clothes look massive on his frame and looking at himself in the mirror only reminds him of how much weight he’s lost, how different he looks. 

His thoughts can’t wander much past that because Tae is grabbing his hands and pulling him to dance with him. Hobi starts popping his limbs around, allowing a smile to take over his face and the movements to take over his body. Jungkook can’t help the laugh that escapes as how his two Hyung look so fun and happy. 

Tae is a great dancer too, Jungkook can tell, but the other takes to flinging his limbs around and contorting his whole body to the music in a humorous way. It does what Tae was most likely trying to accomplish and leaves the human with a big smile of his own on his face. 

Jungkooks body relishes in moving again, in feeling the music and in being in this environment. It’s nothing serious and nothing too strenuous and he’s able to just…feel it all. 

Time all together slows down and the room feels like a world away from Jungkooks own. He forgot how much he truly loves dancing, and having Yugyuem join in his own dace moves too makes it all feel so right. 

Hobi ends up showing the two of them a few dances he’s been working on and one that he’ll be teaching another class the following week and absolutely takes Jungkooks breath away at his abilities and flexibility. 

Sitting there on the floor, shoulder to shoulder with Tae on one side and Yugyeom on the other, watching Hobi dance his heart out and become the beat itself, Jungkook feels peace. 

He never wants this feeling to leave him again. 

~~~

Jungkooks shift is almost over and it couldn’t come any sooner. Last night was a sleepless one and his homework is piling up leaving him too overwhelmed to do any of it. While he wants to ask for a couple of days off, his rent won’t allow it. He feels stuck and on his last bit of sanity. 

It leaves him wishing for that feeling from Hobis studio to envelop him again. 

He just has to finish cleaning up the rest of the dishes then he can finally go home. While the thought of falling into bed the second he gets there sounds amazing, he knows that if he doesn’t focus on finishing missing assignments on top of the ones due tomorrow he will most likely fail a class or two. Stupid midterms. 

He wants to tell Tae about it all, tell him about just how hard he’s struggling but…that thing inside of him that pulls him away from people and fears any resemblance of vulnerability takes control. He holds it all in. 

He deserves to handle it on his own anyways. 

Deep in his own thoughts he doesn’t hear someone join him in the back room and certainly doesn’t expect anyone to speak to him.  

“The others don’t know about you working here, do they?” A familiar voice says from behind him. 

The words startle Jungkook into dropping the glass he was cleaning, leaving shattered remains of it all around his feet. The sound of the glass echos in the humans ears. Glass breaking, shattering….

“Shit kid, don’t move.” It’s mumbled behind him, or the words just can’t reach his ears properly. There’s shuffling behind him. “Do they not have a damn broom back here?” The words are softer until they fade away completely. 

Jungkook eyes refuse to break contact from the mess on the ground. Almost as if in a trance, he starts to bend down. He should pick this up right? Clean up his own mess. 

Glass breaks, metal creeks, screams- 

“Jungkook!” The sound of his name pulls him out of the darkness, out of the memories, and he’s face to face with Yoongi. “Jungkook, let go of the glass okay? I’ve got you.” Slender fingers work at the humans grip until the glass shard clutched in his hand drops to the floor and is replaced by a napkin, covering the blood left behind. 

“Shit! Jungkook are you alright?” It's his coworker Hwan. Jungkook can’t find the words to comfort the others. Is he alright? Why doesn’t this hurt? Shouldn’t it hurt? 

“I got him, I’m gonna take care of him, can you clean this up…” 

The two of them continue talking but Jungkook drowns it all out, allowing himself to just float for a bit. 

Yoongis face is right before his again and he’s saying something, that is until his expression falls when Jungkook doesn’t respond. He thinks Yoongi asks him a question so he slightly nods his head in what he hopes Yoongi is wanting as an answer. 

Hands tenderly grab him by his elbows and help him move on his shaking legs and before he knows it he’s sitting in a chair. The movement helps bring him back to himself a bit. 

Jungkooks not sure how long he sits there but when he finally looks up at Yoongi it’s to see him on the phone, concerned and talking frantically through the line. 

“Hyung?” Jungkook says quietly but somehow Yoongi still catches on. He says goodbye through the phone before putting it in his pocket. 

“Hey kiddo, you with me?” He kneels at the humans feet. 

“‘M sorry about that, I’m okay though. Think I’m gonna go take the bus now.” The words feel strange around his tongue. Jungkook doesn’t understand the look on the elders face at what’s said but what he does know is that he wants more than anything to be in bed right now.

“Look kid, you just had a pretty bad dissociation and I don’t think you're out of it yet. I’m also not about to let you just hop on a bus going anywhere. Are you able to tell me where you are?” Yoongi says, looking at Jungkook, really looking at him. 

The human’s eyes drag around, more feeling coming into his body and recognizing the back room of the bar. Right, the bar. After a moment he nods. 

“I need you to use your words.” Yoongi emphasizes. 

“We’re at work.” 

Relief floods the others face. “Good, now can I take a look at your hand there?” 

Realization dawns and Jungkook registers the phone call Yoongi made. “Who did you call?” He  asks, shoving down the slight anxiety that threatens to rise. 

“I called Tae, he’s on his way.” Yoongi slowly holds onto Jungkooks wrist and waits for the okay to remove the napkin. 

“Why would you do that?” Jungkook snaps, instantly feeling regret at his tone. 

“Because you weren’t answering me Jungkook. If you didn’t notice you grabbed a massive shard of glass with your bare hand and squeezed it.” Yoongi says, seemingly already tired of this shit. So is Jungkook. “I called him because I knew he would be able to bring you back if I couldn’t.” He says a little more softly. 

“You can’t, he doesn’t…”

“I know, he doesn’t know you work here and you want to keep that hidden. You can do whatever you want kid but not if it’s going to threaten your health.” He sighs “We’re getting off topic.” He grabs at Jungkooks wrist again with a little less grace. “The real question here is do you have a death wish for this hand or is it just in my presence you want to cause yourself damage?” 

Jungkook stays quiet, deciding that’s the smartest move here. Now that the napkin is removed and Jungkook can see just how much blood there is, the pain starts to make itself known. He begins to feel the cut burn and hates how much he feels he deserves it. It stands out brightly against the last cut that Yoongi helped him with that has since faded into only just a scar. 

Yoongi finds the first aid kid just like their first meeting and it all leaves Jungkook with a bad taste in his mouth, vertigo and deja vu. 

Yoongi declares stitches are needed and after a frantic shake of his head from Jungkook and threat of running at the suggestion of going to the hospital, Yoongi decides he’s the next best option to help the human. 

It takes about ten minutes all together and by the end of it Jungkooks hand is absolutely throbbing. The stitches are neat and clean and it seems that Yoongi has done this more than once. The pain meds Yoongi was able to get from one of the humans coworkers are starting to kick in but not enough to mask the sting. Jungkook allows the reminisce of his episode to take over again, zoning out and loosing himself in what the other is doing in front of him. 

About when Yoongi is finished a frantic and chaotic looking Taehyung comes barreling into the back room followed by a flustered Hwan. 

“Kookie! Are you okay?” He kneels next to Yoongi, wide eyes widening impossibly further at the stitches in his hand. “What happened? What are you doing here baby?” His words melt the human in front of him and Jungkook smiles back at him, blinking back his fuzzy thoughts. 

“I’m okay Tae, Yoongi hyung stitched me right up so everything is alright. There was just a glass that fell and I got caught in the middle of it.” He says quickly and easily, putting on his regular persona. 

Yoongi looks astonished at the youngers ability to cover up everything so quickly and nicely with a bow on top. Looking at him now you’d never guess he just had an episode so bad he hurt himself. 

Yoongi is going to have to talk to Tae about it later, this isn’t safe for Jungkook, especially how quickly the human is able to mask it. 

“Does it hurt?” Tae cradles the hand in question. Jungkook shakes his head. There’s something about Yoongi hyung and his ability with injuries like this, it seems he really does have the magic touch, easing the pain and leaving it comfortably warm. 

“I got some medicine so I’m okay now.” Jungkook smiles back but Yoongi can tell it’s not all quite there. 

“Are you sure you don’t need a hospital? I can take you right now!” Tae says, his protective alpha making an appearance. 

Jungkook only smiles sweetly. “No hyung, I’m okay, I just want to go home.” 

Tae nods hesitantly. 

“Thank you so much for helping him, hyung.” He says to Yoongi, but keeps his eyes on the human. “Then let’s get you home baby alright? It’s so late you’re probably exhausted.” Tae brushes Jungkooks bangs before grabbing the human by the other elbow and helping him stand. 

Yoongi stands with them, still eying the human. 

“Are you going to be okay Jungkook? Really okay?” He asks pointedly. 

There’s slight hesitation in the human but it’s gone in an instant. 

“I will be, thank you hyung!” Jungkook bows slightly and allows Taehyung to walk him out of the back room and through the bar with Yoongi right on their heels. 

“Did you drive hyung?” Tae asks.

Yoongi nods back to him, suddenly wishing he hadn’t so he could go with the two. 

“I’m going to take him home then alright? I’ll see you later.” Taehyung says, distracted with getting his keys and opening the door for the human before helping him in. 

“Ah hyung, I’m sorry my backpack is still inside.” Jungkook says, and starts to get up as if about to go grab it himself. 

“I got it Kookie! Stay right there!” Tae is back inside in two seconds flat leaving Jungkook and Yoongi to their own devices. Smart kid.

Jungkooks smile falls and he looks to the other. 

“Thank you for helping me and I’m…sorry for everything. For the mess and-“

Yoongi stops him with a held up hand. “I don’t care about that shit.” He sighs and rubs his neck. “I can see you Jungkook and you’re not okay. Why all the secrets? Why the mask?” 

Jungkook looks shocked at the words before a more stoic look replaces it. 

“All the secrets? Were you planning on me finding out your real identity at dinner or were you just going to keep on the lie of who you really are? Why didn’t you tell me who you were when we first met? Or the second time?” Jungkook asks, some of his initial flare from when they met showing up again. 

Yoongi should’ve seen it coming, the kid turning the question on him. He finds comfort in that fire in Jungkook still there at least. “No that’s, I just…listen kid, that was on me. I didn’t know what you’d be like and with Tae practically wanting to court you I didn’t-“

“Tae what? He wants what?” Jungkook interrupts with wide eyes. 

Shit shit shit. 

“That’s not, ahh shit…” Yoongi rubs his arms not because it’s cold but because he doesn’t know what else to do with them. “Look you’re in our lives now and Tae…all of them…all of us, care about you.” 

The words startle the human to silence and Yoongi looks about ready to go back on every single one. They both are saved by Tae returning with the humans backpack and an apology on his lips of taking so long. 

He says bye to Yoongi before hopping in the car himself and pulling out from the curb, all the while Jungkooks eyes don’t leave Yoongi’s until they’re forced to.

Yoongi thinks about his intentions in coming tonight. He had wanted to apologize to Jungkook and set the two of them on the right path because it seems the human isn’t going anywhere. He had wanted to set a better foundation for them because Yoongi actually does care for the doe eyed human that somehow wormed his way into the vampires world. 

Yoongi came, wanting to set things right but now he worries everything revealed in the past hour is horribly horribly wrong. 

Chapter Text

Jungkook’s not sure how many minutes have passed or how many hours have gone by since he fell into bed. Taehyung brought him home from the bar the other night and since then he’s fallen into his own personal black hole. It’s left him just a shell of himself, wishing he were dead to the world. 

Having that glass cup break shattered something in the human, unlocked too many memories and left that door open in his mind. It’s not Yoongi’s fault at all for startling him, there’s no way of him knowing that would have happened. Jungkook is the one that’s the problem. 

And what Yoongi said…about…courting? Jungkook can’t even begin to wrap his head around it. It makes him nervous and scared but also…regrettably almost happy. The guilt that hits at even acknowledging that is heavy as hell. Yoongi has got to be wrong though. It can’t be real because how on earth could this pack really truly ever want him? The human shoves the thought aside to be ignored. 

Texts chime in from the Im’s, checking in and the human only has enough conscious to send quick reassuring messages back that he was fine before returning into the darkness of his own mind.

He’s had to do the same with most of the Kims to keep any of them from coming over. It should be humorous how easy it is to pretend he’s “completely fine, just busy” through the phone when the truth is the complete opposite. 

The biggest surprise is a text from a random number turning out to be Yoongi asking if he was okay. Jungkook feels guilt at lying to them all. 

The human looks at the bandage around his hand and pokes at where he knows the stitches are still healing. It sends a sort of numb-like pressure through his palm, but not enough. 

‘Buddy, you really should drink water and eat something. It’s been a long time since you last did.’ Yugyeom’s concern has been not so subtlety rising as the hours pass on. 

Jungkook looks at the time. He’d forgotten he’s supposed to meet Tae for dinner, the last text he got from the wolf reminds him of it and he feels a pit in his stomach for not responding to him for a while now. 

When they made the plans before the whole glass incident Jungkook was excited and happy at the thought of seeing Tae since he’s been so busy with school and work. Honestly the whole week he knows he’s been spiraling but he had hoped that a night hanging out could fix it. 

He didn’t expect to fall into this hole before he even got the chance. 

Taehyung was thinking they could go out for some noodles and Jungkook was hopeful he’d get his apartment all cleaned up and nice to come back to after and they’d maybe watch a movie on his laptop…but now it’ll take entirely too much energy that he really just does not have. It’s the first weekend that Jungkook miraculously has off on both his jobs and he’s just had to go and ruin it with being like this.

He should’ve known. He always ruins anything good that comes his way. 

His phone pings again and he decides it’s time to finally respond. 

🐻V🐻 : Still up for dinner tonight Kookie? 

Jungkook : I have a lot of homework and I’m not really hungry. Maybe next time.

And I can’t even get out of bed. Jungkook wants to add. He turns over in his tangled up blankets ignoring the vibrating text that comes in. 

‘I thought you were excited to see him again.’ Yugyeom says. 

“I was…I am…” But I’m missing you too much. The familiar heaviness lays over him like a blanket, making his thoughts fuzzy and body feel like led. 

‘You know, having him over could help you not feel so alone.’ 

“I’m not alone.” 

‘At least respond to him ok? He would understand if you tell him the truth.’ Yug says with a sigh and way too much worry. 

Jungkook groans into his pillow looking at Yugyeom. His friend seems so sad and Jungkook would do anything to make that go away. It’s his own damn fault though. 

He sneaks his hand behind him to grab his phone again, looking at the screen under the blankets. 

🐻V🐻 : I don’t mind if you need to work, I just want to see you. I can keep you company. 

🐻V🐻 : It’s been entirely too long. 

Jungkook : We saw each other yesterday and my apartments a mess

🐻V🐻 : You mean three days ago? Once again, entirely too long. And I don’t mind the mess.

Has it really been three days like this? Three days since the bar? Jungkook tries not to let the thought absolutely freak him out. 

🐻V🐻 : How’s this sound, I’ll bring some food over so you have something other than Ramen to eat and then you can decide if you’re up for me staying longer. 

🐻V🐻 : Okay? 

Jungkook stares at the words for a minute. His apartment isn’t exactly the thing that’s a mess, sure there’s a few clothes on the floor and his school work’s scattered around the living room but he overall doesn’t want Taehyung to see him like this. But if time has been slipping enough for it to have been three days already, he must be deeper than he realized. 

🐻V🐻 : Jungkook? 

Jungkook : Okay 

~~~

The knock on the front door is gentle but still startles Jungkook awake. He didn’t mean to fall asleep but his body seemed to have made the decision for him. He wants to scream at himself. You couldn’t have fallen asleep at 3 am like a normal person but decide to drop off at 6 pm without a problem? He grips onto the blankets regretting telling Tae he could come over. What on earth made him say yes? 

He’ll just take the food, say thank you and goodbye, then go back to bed no problem. 

Jungkook shifts to the edge of the mattress, still tangled in blankets and lays for a minute, trying to get his body to move. 

Time must’ve slipped from him again because there’s a concerned voice, well two, both much more urgent now. One coming from the side of him and the other from his front door along with more persistent knocking. 

‘Come on Kookie, Tae’s here. You gotta get up and let him in.’ Yugyeom says firmly. 

“Jungkook-ah? Please answer the door.” Tae’s voice is loud but muffled. 

His phone is ringing and Jungkook fumbles to click ‘accept’. 

“Hey I’m here, you gotta open the door alright?” The soulful voice slips through the speaker sounding composed but a hint of panic is underneath the words. 

“Hey.” Holy crap is that his voice? It’s rough from disuse and he clears it hoping to sound less dead. 

“Oh Kookie.” The words seem to deflate as they’re said. Jungkook can imagine his friends eyebrows furrowed, probably in frustration at how difficult Jungkook’s making everything. “Do you have an extra key or a way I can come in without me having to break this door down? I really need to see you now.” 

Jungkook considers telling Tae to just leave the food on the porch and hanging up but by the way that Yugyeom is looking at him and by the feeling inside his chest he knows he has to let Tae help him out. 

“Jungkook?” 

“Fake rock.” Jungkook says and licks his chapped lips, when was the last time he drank water? 

“Fake…” there’s some shuffling sound through the speaker. “Ah found it! Pretty concerned your key is in a fake rock when you’re on the second floor but we can talk about that another time.” Tae says laughing nervously as he messes with the key in the lock. “Coming in.” 

The front door opens and Jungkook hides his head in the blankets, not wanting to see the disappointment on his friends face. 

There’s the sound of the door closing and something being set on his table. The side of the bed dips and a light hand lays on his side. 

“Hey Kook-ah.” The words are soft and understanding and Tae is always so understanding Jungkook just wants to scream. He isn’t worth Tae’s time but when he talks to him like that and is so comforting like home…it’s harder to remember why he tries to pull himself away in the first place. 

“Is it alright if I…” the covers start to gently slide from his head and he allows it. Jungkook knows his hair is an absolute mess and his face must look pale and closely resembling death but he cracks his eyes to look up at Tae. 

“Ah there’s my beautiful boy…” Tae says with so much fondness and when he brushes aside Jungkooks hair it’s with so much care. Fingers against his skin. The back of Taes cold hand presses on Jungkooks forehead and a small frown tugs at his lips when he doesn’t feel a fever. He continues the petting to the messy hair instead. The younger can’t help but close his aching eyes to the touch. 

The olders nose and cheeks are red and going by the melting snow dusting his hair…Jungkook feels like crap for making the other go out in the cold. The guilt of being such a burden threatens to eat him alive. 

“I’m sorry.” Jungkook whispers because what can you say in a situation like this? 

“Sweetheart, don’t apologize alright? You have nothing to be sorry about. My heart aches seeing you like this and I just want to help you feel better.” The stroking at his hair doesn’t stop. “Do you know when the last time you ate or drank something was?” Tae looks around the apartment and the lack of dishes nags at him. 

Jungkook shrugs honestly, not wanting to shake his head to dislodge the wonderful feeling of Tae’s hand in his hair. 

The Alpha sighs and Jungkook curls into himself at the sound. Tae’s probably disgusted right now, finally seeing a fraction of what he signed up for by letting this mess of a person into his life. Jackson and the others have stayed around but they’re the only ones, and it’s probably out of pity and obligation more so than anything else. 

They never really cared about you

You’re an inconvenience 

Tae suddenly stands, jerking Jungkook from his thoughts and taking his now warm hand away from the still form beneath him. Jungkook can’t stop the whimper that escapes his lips. The hand quickly returns to his hair. 

“Hey, it’s alright, I told you I was just getting some water okay? I’m not going to leave you Jungkook. I won’t leave you.” There’s a light kiss on his forehead that makes Jungkook squeeze his eyes tighter. How could Tae ever want to be around him like this? How could he ever care for him? 

Jungkook opens his eyes, watching Tae take his coat off and get a glass of water. 

“Jeeze it’s cold in here.” Tae says quietly as if to himself, searching for the apartments thermostat. Jungkook didn’t realize but now that it’s been pointed out he feels a shiver run throughout his body. 

‘I’m really glad you let him come Kook-ah. He cares a lot about you and you have no idea how happy that makes me. You just gotta let him love you alright?’ Yug says, smiling softly down at his friend. His eyes tell a different story though, sadness still lacing them. 

Jungkook lifts a hand from the blankets as if he could push away the furrow to his friends brows. 

Tae returns before Jungkook can respond and he looks confused at the youngers extended arm. He grabs the cold digits gently in his own hand, blowing on Jungkooks fingers to warm them before pressing a light kiss on the pads of his fingers. 

“Alright Jungkookie let’s get you sitting up.” Tae sneaks his hands underneath Jungkooks shoulders and slides in behind him so Jungkook can be propped up against his chest. The warmth is nice especially since Tae’s pointed out how frigid his apartment is and Jungkook is now nuzzling into Taes neck without even realizing it. 

He gets some water down and Jungkooks head doesn’t feel so heavy anymore, Taes warm body grounding him to this moment helps as well. 

‘See? Things aren’t so bad now. And you aren’t freezing your balls off as much either’ 

Jungkook sends a half hearted glare Yugeoms way. 

“You’re really cold Kook-ah. How does a warm bath sound then we can get some food in you?” Tae rubs a soothing hand up and down Jungkooks arms to get some circulation flowing and honestly a hot bath sounds incredible. 

“Yeah, ok.” Jungkook says, and doesn’t sound so much like a smoker now.

Tae is so patient as Jungkook makes his way slowly off the bed and into the bathroom at a snails pace. He helps ease him onto the closed toilet seat and smiles sweetly at him before filling up the tub with warm water. 

“You want bubbles?” Tae says with a sly grin and Jungkook can’t bring himself to smile back at him but simply shakes his head no. 

Once the tub is filled and Tae finds a clean towel to set on the hook he finally turns to his friend. He kneels in front of Jungkook and runs a hand through the humans greasy bangs, a habit he seems to have developed any time he’s around Jungkook. 

“Would you like me to help?” He asks, hand moving to caress Jungkook’s cheek which the latter can’t help but lean into. Jungkook shakes his head, already feeling bad for ruining Tae’s night. 

Do you honestly think he wants to stay when you’re so needy? A burden? 

“You can go.” He whispers, even though his voice and hand gripping Taes shirt scream stay. 

You’re a waste of space

“I’m not going anywhere Kookie. Why don’t you get in and we wash you up then I’ll heat up the food and make you some tea too. Is that okay?” Tae says before testing the water and turning it off. Jungkook nods, letting the other know that yes, he’s comfortable enough for Tae to help him. 

Taehyung stands and turns around to give Jungkook some privacy as he strips down to get into the tub.

Something in Jungkook tries to warn himself to hide, that there’s a part of him he never wants Taehyung to see but through his muddled thoughts it’s not important. 

Jungkook gives the wolf the okay to turn around. The small gasp that comes from Tae and the way that he freezes in place shouldn’t surprise Jungkook and as he follows the wolfs gaze to his wrists he remembers why. 

The cuts are lined up neatly, some faded, some a bit more recent…but all so ugly. Jungkook hides his hands under the water, snapping Tae out of his stupor. 

“I’m sorry baby I didn’t mean to startle you. It’s okay.” Tae smiles at him but it’s wavering and broken. He seems to shake himself out of his thoughts, rubbing a thumb over Jungkook’s cheek. “Just relax alright, let hyung take care of you.” 

The wolfs fingers are incredibly gentle as they work through Jungkooks hair, wetting it and lathering the locks as well. He gives the cloth to let Jungkook clean the rest of his body before Tae takes over again. He skips over Jungkook’s wrists and the human knows it’s something Taehyung is going to bring up later but right now the smell of citrus and lavender fills the room and Jungkook feels as if surrounded by a kind of warmth that’s been absent for days. 

Tae makes low comments that Jungkook can’t quite catch onto as he closes his eyes and leans into the loving touches of the other. It’s soothing and comforting, both feelings he will always associate with the wolf.  

Once completely cleaned up Tae places a hand on Jungkooks shoulder and rubs a thumb at his collarbone. “Don’t fall asleep quite yet. I’ll get that food heated up for you, just relax in here for a few more minutes and I’ll be right back.” Tae places a featherlight kiss on the crown of Jungkooks wet head and gives him a smile. 

Jungkook doesn’t question the door being left open a crack as Taehyung leaves the room. The water feels incredible on his aching body and makes him feel more fuzzy. 

With Tae’s absence now the rooms comfort and serenity that was just there moments ago has turned into something much more empty and lonely, almost as if he only dreamed Tae was there all along. It’s too empty.

He hates the thoughts that plague him in moments like these, wishing he asked Tae to not leave the room at all. Maybe his friend could stop Jungkooks mind from replaying the old memories. 

It’s things that were said at the start of the beginning of his hell that seem to speak loudly in his mind. 

He’s pretty banged up…

…taking off life support 

Say goodbye

“Shut up.” Jungkook chokes out. 

Say goodbye

His fingers skim over the water and he has the urge to go under, maybe it’d drown out the voices. He starts by dipping his head back to his hairline feeling the water soak into his hair. He takes a deep breath. 

He left you 

‘Kook-ah, don’t. I mean it.’ Yugyeom says sternly, knowing the thoughts running through the kids mind. 

Say goodbye

Jungkook closes his eyes. 

‘Stop! Don’t be stupid, just call Taehyung back in alright?’ 

Jungkook looks to the other.

‘Jungkook!’ 

He goes under and the hot water encompasses his face. His head feels like it’s full on floating at this point and he enjoys the weightlessness around his thoughts. 

‘Jungkook!’ 

The seconds go by and his lungs begin to protest, almost screaming for air as he lets the last of his out. He squeezes his eyes tight and welcomes the feeling of his head about to explode, refusing to give in and pull himself out. 

The pressure is too much. 

His head will explode. 

Maybe there will finally be peace after. 

“Jungkook?”

The words and memories are finally drowning out. 

“Jungkook!” 

Maybe the pain will finally go away.

Hands roughly grab and yank him out of his bubble. The shock of being pulled out makes him involuntarily gasp, breathing in some of the water and coughing till he feels like a lung is gonna come up. 

His chest burns and lungs ache as he gasps precious air in gulps. His body hates him for the abuse and when he comes back to his senses it’s to be in Taehyungs arms. Taehyung who pulls him out at arms length to look at him. Taehyung who’s real and here and tangible. Taehyung who’s words are real. Taehyung who’s eyes are frantic as they run over Jungkooks features. 

Once Jungkook doesn’t see black spots in his vision and he can take in a normal breath Taehyung speaks. 

“What…” His voice sounds strange and Jungkook sees a flash of color in his eyes. His hands grip Jungkooks shoulders tightly enough to almost hurt. “What were you doing?” 

Jungkook looks past Tae to see Yugyeom crouched down holding himself, a haunted look encompassing his face. 

Shit. Jungkook refuses to look into either of their eyes. He coughs again.

“Jungkook.” Tae says and his tone screams ‘look at me’. 

Jungkook takes another deep breath, feeling water still tickle at his throat. “I didn’t…I wasn’t…” Wasn’t trying to kill myself. Jungkook wants to say, wants to ease Taes mind and worries, wants to tell him he’s fine and make him smile. But he can’t. He wants the world to be alright and not completely broken and screwed and he wants the shitty pain to be over. But it’s not. 

“You scared the shit out of me. What were you thinking?” Tae voice is too big for the small space around them. 

Jungkook leans his head so it’s resting on Taes chest, feeling incredibly tired and sorry. Always sorry. 

“They were too loud.” He whispers. 

“What?” 

“I can’t do this anymore hyung.” 

Tae holds Jungkook so tight again it almost hurts. “Jungkook don’t you ever do that again. No matter how hard it gets don’t you dare do that because I could never bare to lose you. It would destroy me Jungkook, I would be absolutely destroyed.” Tae says into Jungkooks hair, voice hallow as his held back tears begin to fall. “I’m here and I’m not leaving so you can’t leave me.” 

The water is still warm but Jungkook shivers. Tae allows the humans scent to calm him down as he holds the younger close, heart beating too fast to let go of him anytime soon. 

“You’re alright, you’re gonna be alright.” 

Chapter Text

They both are silent as Jungkook chokes down the soup Tae brought for him. It tastes good, it really does but the feeling of the hot liquid going down his throat twists his stomach into all kinds of knots and makes the voices in his head pipe up. 

Disgusting 

You think you deserve to feel better?

You deserve to feel like crap, especially after causing so much trouble 

He knows the soup will most likely come back up as soon as Tae leaves and what’s keeping him from rushing to the bathroom now is knowing he’s already caused enough grief for the wolf. If Jungkook can help the other feel a little better by seeing him spoon a few more bites then he’ll do it. 

You think he wants to take care of a burden like you? 

He’s embarrassed for the whole day really. Especially the whole bath fiasco…or at least he feels like he should be embarrassed, or feel anything about it at all about it. 

You’re like a stupid child. 

After Tae found him and said what he said they sat there for a while, the other just holding Jungkook tight in his arms for who knows how long. 

The water got cold and Tae eventually grabbed Jungkook his towel and drained the tub, not letting his eyes leave his friend for even a second. It was a long and sluggish process getting dressed in sweats and Tae hesitantly offered to bandage the humans wrists to which the other declined. 

Once he was in the warm clothing, sleep pulled at him roughly begging him to give into oblivion. But of course Taehyungs next source of action was to watch him like a hawk and shove a bowl of soup in front of him. 

He knows Tae is trying to help, is helping, with the food and being here but Jungkook’s just so tired and the spinning in his head hasn’t stopped. 

He feels pity for you, that’s why he’s still here

He can tell Tae wants to say something, anything, and his words hang in the air around them. Jungkook almost wants to yell at him to just grab them, tell Jungkook how disappointed he is, tell him how disgusted with him he is. 

You’re disgusting

He wants to yell at Tae because the man is far too good for the sorry excuse of a person sitting across from him. 

He’s never cared

He’s going to leave you

You’re an inconvenience

A small tap on Jungkooks nose startles him out of his stirring thoughts. 

“I know it’s Jins cooking but, what did that soup ever do to you?” Tae says with a smile that doesn’t reach his eyes.

“Eh?” 

“You’re glaring at your bowl like it just spilled on your Iron Man socks.” 

“Oh I…sorry.” Jungkook takes the change in the air as an excuse to sit back, setting his spoon down signaling he’s finished eating. There’s still about half the bowl left but there’s really no way he can stomach any more. 

He catches Yugyeoms glance from across the room and almost laughs at the situation. He almost drowned in the damn bathtub not even an hour ago, the voices are as loud as ever and here he is having a hard time with something as simple as soup. 

“What’s going on in that head of yours bun?” Tae says softly, letting his hand rest on Jungkooks knee, running his thumb back and forth over the fabric there. 

You don’t deserve him 

You don’t deserve any of them 

You think Yugyeom likes being stuck with you? 

That’s why he left in the fir- 

“Stop.” Jungkook startles himself as the word passes his lips. It’s not loud or harsh but enough for Tae to hear. 

“Jungkook?” Tae’s comforting movements on his knee freeze and he looks at the younger with what should be hurt on his face but there’s only concern visible. 

It’s your fault

‘Jungkook please, you can talk to him. You can’t keep doing this alone.’ Yugyeom says from the side. 

“I told you I’m not alone.” Jungkook’s head is spinning. 

“I’m right here Kookie. You need to breathe ok?” Tae’s voice sounds far away and so does the sound of uneven breathing. The soup bowl in front of him gets moved and Tae is sitting closer now. Movements seem muddled and slow…as if he’s still under the water. 

Is he still in the water? Is he still drowning? 

“I got you out of the tub Kook, you’re not drowning, I’m right here.” 

The hands on his face are foreign. 

Worthless

Jungkook’s chest constricts and 

He 

can’t 

breathe 

~~~

Earlier that day

Taehyung’s been worried all week. Jungkook has bad days, Tae knows this to some extent, but the past week his friend has seemed distant and falling fast. Not to mention how that night he picked Jungkook up from the bar had set off hundreds of warnings through the wolfs mind. Jungkook wasn’t just off but completely detached, almost like the human was just letting his body move and speak by muscle memory and not that he was actually in control. It was scary. 

Namjoon had to remind Tae multiple times that being stressed around midterms was completely normal, but it did nothing to ease the wolf’s nerves. The rest of the group tried everything to keep him busy and not worrying every second about the state of Jungkook. 

How on earth could he not though? Even Yoongi’s energy about the human has shifted and Taehyung can feel an itching worry emanating from the other now which only makes things worse. 

The human’s shown he isn’t exactly ready to be smothered by the attention and love the whole pack wants to give and they are trying their best to respect his space. Taehyung, is trying his best to respect that. 

Taehyung can see the other is slowly drowning and he feels at loss being unable to pull him out of it. 

The main thing that kept Tae going through the week was knowing that he would see Jungkook for dinner but when the human stoped responding to texts he couldn’t help but panic. Especially when Jackson called to let him know Jungkook hasn’t responded to him for a while either. 

It’s easy to tell the Alpha was overridden with worry for the human just as Taehyung was. None of them know the boundary between respecting Jungkook’s space and taking that step past his walls he’s got up. To add to his worry, apparently Jungkook had asked the Im’s to give him space. At what point will the human as the same of the Kim pack?

“It’s only been two days Taehyung-ah.” Namjoon says, his own hidden worry evident in his demeanor and scent. “We all know he’s been busy and stressed, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s simply sleeping the week off.”

“It’s been three days and yeah I just saw him but like I said he was so worn and…distant. I’m worried.” Tae can’t help the waver in his voice.

“When are any of us not worried when it comes to Jungkookie?” Hoesek says, ruffling Taes curls and taking a seat on their couch. 

Yoongi sits back against his seat, wringing his hands and has a scowl on his face that seems to have been there for days. Taehyung thinks the topic of Jungkook must still make him uncomfortable. 

“Maybe we should go drop by? Especially if he isn’t answering, something could be wrong.” Jimin says, sitting next to Taehyung, stilling the youngers fidgeting hands with his own small one. The movement reminds Tae to take a breath and he smiles gratefully. 

“We have dinner plans tonight but I haven’t heard back from him since yesterday. And usually he at least responds with something.” Tae doesn’t mean to sound whiny but that’s exactly how he comes off as. 

“Why don’t you try texting him again and if he doesn’t respond in an hour we can do something more. I would hate to wake Kookie if he’s actually getting sleep.” Jin says, leaning against the kitchen island onto folded arms. 

“Alright. But one hour and if I get nothing back I’m going over.” Tae pulls out his phone and looks at the last couple of texts the human has yet to reply to but he still types up the next one. 

Taehyung : Still up for dinner tonight? 

The others sit around, pretending to be immersed in a book or their phones or chatting about useless things but they all know they are waiting for Jungkook’s text back. Who knew such a soft soul could get the six of them so wrapped around his little finger. 

Taes heart jumps when he finally sees the three little dots. “He’s typing!” 

“See, nothing to worry about!” Jin says as if he hasn’t held back on letting his ‘parental instincts’ kick in countless times. Yoongi rolls his eyes then sits forward to hear the reply. 

🐰Kookie💜: I have a lot of homework and I’m not really hungry. Maybe next time.

Tae’s stomach does a weird flip. 

“What did he say?” Jimin scoots closer to read the text on Tae’s phone. 

“That he has a lot of homework and he’s not hungry.” Tae feels his brow furrow. “Am I reading too much into everything? Because what if he really is just tired and not wanting to see me but on the other hand what if he’s definitely not ok? Or am I completely overreacting? Have I been too much for him?” It’s hard to tell when it comes to Jungkook. Taehyungs mind seems to go wild at just the thought of him and he doesn’t want to waste time away from him.

Taehyung : I don’t mind if you need to work, I just want to see you. I can keep you company :)

Taehyung : It’s been entirely too long. 

🐰Kookie💜 : We saw each other yesterday and my apartments a mess

Taehyung frowns at the text. 

“What? What did he say?” Jimin says, leaning in to see it himself. 

Tae just shakes his head, waving the other off and typing quickly. 

Taehyung : You mean three days ago? Once again, entirely too long.

Taehyung : And I don’t mind the mess 

“Jin, would you be able to make some good comfort food?” Taehyung says, not even looking up to his elder. 

“Yah! You should be glad I’m your hyung. Other makenes speak to their hyung like ‘hyung let me make you food’ or ‘hyung what can I do for you?’” Jin continues to complain even as he moves to shelves and begins to pull things out. “Aren’t you happy I’m your hyung?” He says louder as he turns the stove on for the meat. 

“So happy, hyung.” Tae says and the others hide their smirks. 

Taehyung : How’s this sound, I’ll at least bring some food over so you have something other than Ramen to eat and then you can decide if you’re up for me staying longer. 

He waits. 

Taehyung : Okay? 

Damn is he impatient. 

Taehyung : Jungkook? 

🐰Kookie💜 : Okay 

~~~

After Jungkooks response they packed up a nice meal and plenty of leftovers. Tae put on his shoes and jacket to head out, feeling antsy and in need of seeing Jungkook as soon as possible. This feeling in his chest won’t be able to release until he does. 

Just as Taehyung is ready to leave Young pulls him aside with the same furrowed brow that’s been plaguing his expressions lately. 

“Tae, I know you’re already worried about Jungkook and I think that…I think he’s really far from okay.” Yoongi says lowly and hesitantly. 

“What do you mean hyung?” Tae feels it in his gut that Yoongi’s right, he hates that the older is but knowing Tae’s had his own feeling for it for some time now…how awful is he to have ignored that…continuously.  

“Jungkook wasn’t…when that glass broke at the bar he dissociated.” Yoongi continues. “He covered it up way too easily and I have a feeling that it’s happened before. That he’s covered it up before.”  

Taehyung swallows against the sudden lump in his throat, nodding to the other. 

“Just, make sure he’s alright.” Yoongi ends, looking away just as Jin rounds the corner with the packaged food.

“If this isn’t enough for the bunny you let me know and I’ll head right over with more.” Jin says, and Taehyung can tell the elder wishes he were coming too. 

Taehyung had decided it would be best he go alone as to not crowd Jungkook and while the others had agreed, it doesn’t mean they are happy with it. 

Tae lays a hand on Yoongi’s shoulder rubbing his thumb lightly. “I’ll talk to you all after I get there.” He says with what he hopes is a reassuring smile. 

“Give Kookie the biggest hug from me!” Jimin calls out after him once he leaves the apartment. 

Just as the door shuts behind Tae, he can see Yoongi step forward as if unable to stop himself from the pull to see Jungkook. That look on his hyungs face stays with the younger the whole car ride there.

~~~

Tae looses himself in his thoughts and motions of stirring the heating soup, swirling into worry for the human in the other room. He’s been here less than an hour and still has no idea how to truly help Jungkook or what’s even going on with the younger. His worry that he’s trying so hard to keep at bay eats at him, spurring on way too many what if’s. 

The silence is deafening until his phone ringing harshly pulls him out of it. 

“Hey, how’s Jungkookie holding up?” Jimin’s tone is light and hopeful. Tae looks back to see the door to the bathroom still cracked open how he left it.

“Not good. When I got here he was in pretty bad shape.” Taehyung rubs a hand over his neck, hearing a controlled breath through the line. “He’s not sick thank goodness but he seemed disconnected from everything around him.” 

Dissociation, his mind replaces. Yoongis words also circle around him, only making his worry increase more. “Jungkook was laying in bed and seemed really out of it and most likely hasn’t eaten in days and the apartment was freezing and shit…Jimin I’m so worried about him. He’s so skinny I can see his ribs. His ribs Jimin.” Taehyung chokes out, the words catching in his throat and a panic rising in his chest. He stirs the soup again waiting for it to bubble and wants to do so much more for the human. 

“Hey just breathe Taehyung-yah. Do you need me to come over?” Just hearings Jimins soothing voice over the line calms something in Taehyung but still leaves an uneasiness of wanting his mate here with him now. 

“No. I…” he takes a breath hoping his words will come out more steady. “I don’t want to overwhelm him. He seemed hesitant to even have me here.”

Jimin makes a small sound and Tae can tell it’s tearing him up to not be with Jungkook right now. 

“Where is he right now?” 

“Taking a bath, the apartment was like -30 degrees in here, it’s a miracle that he wasn’t completely frozen by the time I got here. I think he’s aware of how he’s feeling but…he apologized the moment I got here like it’s his fault he’s feeling this way.” 

“You’re doing great Tae, just keep giving him warmth and love and know I’m right by my phone the second either of you need me and I can be there too if he wants. I’ll talk to the others and we’re gonna figure out a way to help out Kook ok? I think Jin hyung is about to pace himself into a hole and Yoongi won’t stop fidgeting. We all care so much about him.” Jimin says with a huff of a laugh. "Don’t worry we’re gonna see our bunny smiling in no time alright?” 

“Yeah.” Tae’s grateful for Jimin and the others, knowing Kookies got them all right there for him. “There’s one more thing, well probably a million more things but…his wrists Jimin.” Taehyung chokes on the words. His chest constricts and that familiar life needing panic grips at his chest, digging in demanding to be felt. He holds tight onto the phone. “His wrists hyung, they were…” His whisper breaks off into a hiccuped breath. 

“Tae Breathe darling. You’ve got to breathe.” Understanding lines Jimin’s words and Taehyung is grateful he doesn’t have to explain any further. “Have you taken your medication today? Please be honest.” Jimin is more serious in his words. 

Taehyung nods quickly before answering verbally. “I did but it doesn’t feel like it’s helping.”

“Do you need me to bring you anything?” Jimin asks in the same tone of voice.

Taehyung hesitates. He needs to be here for Jungkook but how can he if he’s falling apart himself? “I don’t know. I think I’ll be okay. I just want Jungkook to be okay.” 

“He will be. We’re here for him and he’s so lucky to have you Tae. He’s going to be okay.”

An uneasy feeling sinks in Taehyungs stomach and he looks to the bathroom door. It’s really quiet in there, which yeah he doesn’t expect Jungkook to be splashing around in the water but still….

“Tae?” 

“Hold on, I’ll call you back.” He sets his phone down against Jimin’s protests and makes his way to the cracked door. His knocking on the worn wood seems to echo throughout the small apartment. 

“Jungkook?” 

Jungkooks scent is completely muddled which makes sense because of the water but the silence shouldn’t scare him as much as it does. 

“Jungkook-ah I’m coming in alright?” 

Nothing. His hand grips tight on the edge of the door and he steps forward to peek through the crack. The kid’s scaring him right now. 

His quick look inside confuses him more than anything. The bath seems to be empty? But the waters rippling and….shit. 

Jungkook’s under the water. 

Taes world stops. The scene in front of him is too familiar, too painful, too real. All he can think is his nightmare is happening again. 

Chapter Text

It takes 20 minutes. 20 agonizing minutes of trying to help Jungkook calm down and breathe properly again. 20 minutes of Taehyungs own panic threatening to rise right along side the suffering humans. 

Not long into Jungkooks panic attack had he fallen clumsily to the floor with his hands splayed out to feel the kitchen tile beneath his touch. Taehyung had done his best to catch the other in his decent but there was only so much he could do with the sudden and startling movement. 

He walked Jungkook through different grounding exercises, asked for consent before touching him to help the human know he was real and exaggerated his own breathing for the younger to follow. 

By the end of it Jungkook was shaking so bad it was like finding him again at the start of all this, frozen and so alone. 

“Please Tae, I just want to sleep. Please.” Jungkooks sudden plea breaks the wolfs heart. The humans big doe eyes are brimming with tears and he looks so utterly exhausted. Taehyung brings a hand up to cradle the youngers cheek. 

“Okay baby, you can sleep.” He says softly, gently thumbing away a tear that starts to trail down the others face. “Do you want the couch or the bed sweetheart?” Tae says in a whisper. 

Jungkook looks at his room as if the short journey there will simply be too much for his body to handle. “Couch.” He says at last. 

Taehyung crouches down with his back facing Jungkook, shocking the younger. “Get on baby, I’ll get you there okay?” He looks back at the human to catch a faint blush creeping up his neck and after a moment of pause the human leans forward onto the others back anyways. 

Once seated on the couch Jungkooks eyes close on their own and his head lists forward. Within seconds Tae has him guided down onto a pillow and covered with a blanket. “I’ll be here when you wake up.” A soft kiss on his forehead is the last thing Jungkook registers before welcoming the release of sleep. 

As soon as Jungkooks breathing evens out Taehyung allows his held in sob to escape. How could Jungkook be hurting this bad and Tae be so clueless? His tears flow silently as he brushes back the youngers hair. To imagine what the human must have gone through…

After taking way too much time just staring at the other and watching his breathing Taehyung takes a look around the humans space. He cleans up the kitchen and the dishes that were left out and puts away the leftovers. He really wishes Jungkook ate more of the soup than he did but a little is better than nothing. They’ll have to try again when he wakes up. 

He strips the bed and puts the sheets along with Jungkooks dirty laundry in the hamper only to realize there’s no washer here. He takes a mental note to find out where Jungkook gets his wash done and just how far and how much he has to pay for it. Man he wishes the human could just live with him away from this all and safe. 

Taehyung replaces the bed with a new clean set of sheets from the closet before mopping up the water from the floor in the bathroom, pulling his mind away from what could’ve happened to Jungkook if the wolf didn’t walk in when he did. 

What would’ve happened to Jungkook if Tae didn’t come at all? 

It leaves a pit in his stomach too heavy to even think about. 

He spends well over two hours just cleaning, keeping himself occupied and distracted in the small, too small apartment and checking on Jungkook every ten minutes. He’s grateful that Jungkook can at least get some sleep, the dark bags under his eyes attest to not having had enough at all.

When there’s nothing else left to clean Taehyung finally checks his phone revealing missed calls from Jimin and Jin and one even from Jackson. He can imagine the rest of his pack stirring in their own worries about what’s going on over here. What is he supposed to tell them? Does he even understand what’s happened in such little time? 

Does Jackson know any of this about Jungkook?

The cupboards before him are so bare and opening the fridge reveals only a couple Soju bottles. Even with all the food Tae brought there isn’t nearly enough here for the human. 

Ready to send a text to the group chat asking if they could do some grocery shopping, Taes fingers hesitate to text. If Jungkook agreed, maybe they could just have him stay with them. He would be surrounded by love and comfort and one of them could always be with him if…anything were to happen again. They could prevent anything from happening. 

Movement from the couch makes the wolfs head snap up and he rushes over to be there as he promised. 

Jungkooks deep brown eyes open up after a few moments and connect with the wolf’s. Tae smiles down at him sweetly, hoping that the rest did the human good. 

“Hey baby, how are you feeling? You weren’t asleep all that long, would you like to rest some more?” Tae brushes aside Jungkooks hair again, keeping his voice low and words slow. 

It takes Jungkook a moment to comprehend his surroundings and Taehyung can practically see the last 24 hours soak in. Jungkook looks down at the blanket, as if ashamed. 

“I’m okay hyung.” He says, voice a little rough from having just woken up. 

“I’ll get you some water alright?” Tae gets up quickly and heads to the kitchen to do so. When he comes back it's to Jungkook not having moved and staring off at a spot in the room seeming to be zoning out, its something the wolf has noticed the other does a lot. 

“Here baby, let’s get you sitting up okay?” Tae sets the glass on the coffee table before helping Jungkook sit up, much like how he helped him in bed just hours ago. 

After Jungkook takes a couple of sips his demeanor changes and something in the air shifts but Tae can’t put his finger on what that change is. 

“Thank you Tae, I’m sorry about everything. With midterms and work I think the stress finally caught up to me.” He lets out a dry chuckle. “I can’t believe I acted like such a baby and I think you were right, the food and sleep really did help and I feel a lot better.” He finally looks up to link his gaze with Tae's and the wolf almost flinches at the obvious change in the humans eyes.

This look that Jungkook is giving him is one that Tae has seen countless times but only now understands. His eyes are so guarded, Tae can see that now, and there’s almost a numbness to his words. If Tae hadn’t been here to witness the human being anything but okay, he might have believed him. Hell, he probably has believed the millions of lies Jungkook has told him about ‘being okay’. His stomach churns at the thought. 

“Jungkook…” Tae starts, still thrown off by this revelation. 

“Really Tae, I can’t thank you enough for helping me. I am still pretty tired though so I think I’m going to head back to bed.” Jungkook says with a sheepish smile and in any other case Tae would coo. Instead he sits there, almost too stunned to process the rollercoaster of emotions he’s seen the human go through just today. “I’m sorry that you’ve spent so much time here hyung but you should probably get some rest too, it must be late.” Jungkook continues, babbling, he then looks around through the blankets. “What time is it anyways? Crap where’s my phone.” He murmurs to himself. 

Tae quickly grabs Jungkooks hands, stopping the others movements. 

“Jungkook please.” He whispers, more like begging. 

Those brown eyes look up. Those brown eyes that Tae has seen so much wonder and light and joy in before, he wonders if those were all times that Jungkook was just masking what was really going on underneath. Tae knows what those eyes look like without their shields up and he prays that he will never be fooled by them again. 

“You’re not okay baby.” He whispers, continuing. He can feel Jungkooks hand in his own twitch as if wanting to pull away. “Please, you don’t have to lie to me, you never have to lie to me.” He squeezes the cold hands in his. 

Jungkook swallows and looks much like a deer in the headlights. 

“I will never force you to tell me anything you don’t want to or aren’t ready to…but please, don’t lie to me.” Tae says, holding back from letting his emotions take over completely and settles on running his thumb over the humans knuckles. 

“I…Tae I…” Jungkook looks away and his eyes dart to that spot in the room he was staring at earlier. 

“Kook.” Tae lightly squeezes the hand in his to grab the others attention again.”You really scared me today.” 

Jungkook looks down at their intertwined fingers. “I’m-I’m sorry hyung. I’m really sorry.”

A vibrating sound comes from the bedroom and while it’s quiet enough to not have noticed while talking, it fills in the silence between the two. 

“Shoot that-that’s my phone I gotta…” Jungkoook lets go of Taes hand and stands from the couch, slightly swaying from what seems to be dizziness. Tae holds out his hands to catch the other if he falls but Jungkook is already making his way to the bedroom. 

Taehyung sighs, not knowing what to do. Why does Jungkook have to be so stubborn?  

He follows him regardless to the bedroom to find Jungkook seated on the side of the bed. “It’s Jimin hyung.” He reads from the screen but waits until the vibration stops and the notification shows it’s a missed call now. “Did you uh…did you tell him anything?” Jungkook bites his lip, still looking at the phone in his hands that has now gone black. 

Tae moves forward slowly and once he reaches the other he kneels at the humans feet. He knows he needs to choose his words carefully. 

“I was worried about you Kook. The others were too. They just want to make sure you’re doing alright.” He can tell the anxiety is rising in the other. “I didn’t tell him everything okay?” Not everything. He can visibly see Jungkooks shoulders loose some of their tension. 

“I’m fine.” Jungkook says with a slight pout. 

This time it’s a knock on the door that interrupts the two of them and Taehyung wants to swear, having gotten no where with the human. Jungkook looks up, startled. 

“Don’t worry, I’ll get it.” Tae reassures quickly before standing up to answer the door, trying to stomp down his annoyance at the interruption. 

Opening the door reveals Jimin in all his 5’9 glory, and he does not look happy. 

“Where’s Jungkook?” Jimin crosses the threshold straight past his mate, yeah he’s pissed.

“Jimin what are you doing here?” Tae says in a hushed voice.

“It’s been hours Tae, hours! You drop my call because something happened then you refused to answer any of the times I tried calling you back! Of course I came.” Jimin says in the same tone of voice but its fueled by much more than just annoyance but clear panic as well. 

“Jimin hyung?” Jungkook emerges from the bedroom and Jimin deflates in relief immediately. 

“Ah my sweet bunny it’s so good to see you.” Jimin wastes no time in enveloping the other in a hug. Jungkook hugs back immediately quickly breaking eye contact with Tae from over the others shoulder. 

“What are you doing here?” Jungkook asks with a smile and if Tae weren’t here to witness it himself he’d never guess the human had a panic attack just hours before. 

“I wanted to check on you of course. How are you Kookie? Was Tae able to get some food into you?” Jimin runs a hand up and down Jungkooks arm. 

Jungkook nods. “Yeah I’m doing much better.” His eyes briefly look to Tae before focusing on Jimin again. “I’m mostly just sleepy now…” 

“You know I’m pretty hungry and I think we all could do well eating some dinner together.” Jimin leans forward to the younger with a hand to his mouth as if sharing a secret. “I could even order take out which Jin hyung isn’t here to scold us for.” 

Tae almost scoffs at the vampires blatant lying, it takes everything in the pack to just get Jimin to drink enough blood on the regular and for him to be bringing up eating an actual meal? It just attests to how worried for the human he really is. 

“I don’t know if I can eat right now hyung.” Jungkook says hesitantly after a moment. 

Earlier it was clear that Jungkook was struggling to finish the soup that was made for him, Tae wonders how many other meals the younger has been missing. 

“Why don’t we go sit down baby?” Tae interjects. “If you’re alright with Jimin being here why don’t we watch a movie or something huh? We can order some food and you can eat if you’re feeling up to it.” He rubs at the humans lower back and can feel some tension leave the youngers body. 

“Okay hyung.” Jungkook says at last and heads to the couch without another word. 

Jimin sends the wolf a look to which Tae mouths the word ‘later’. 

They order food and Jungkook ends up eating a few bites of rice before calling it enough. The air is a bit more comfortable, probably because not all the attention is on Jungkook and the calming sounds of Studio Ghibli fill the space from his laptop. As the night moves on the human gets visibly sleepier and sleepier to a point he can hardly keep his eyes open. He also makes no protests when Jimin starts scratching at the hair at his nape. His head droops until it lands onto Taes shoulder to which he helps guide the human to be laying on his lap. 

Jimin takes the humans legs to be rested on his own lap and allows the movie to fill the room until he’s sure that Jungkook is truly asleep. 

“What happened Tae?” Jimin whispers, looking his mate in the eye. There’s no more anger there but deep concern.

Tae brushes back Jungkooks hair, a motion that he’s felt he’s done at least twenty times already. 

“When you dropped your call with me…” Jimin says, prodding further. 

“He…” Tae thinks about the relief on Jungkooks face when Tae said he didn’t tell the others everything. “He was…having a hard time breathing.” Tae says at last, not entirely lying but not spelling out the whole truth. He doesn’t even know how he would tell the other that he thinks Jungkook might be on the edge of being actively suicidal. “I-I think it was a panic attack. I got him to calm down and eat after and he exhausted himself into sleep. I kept myself busy cleaning the apartment and didn’t mean to go so long without calling you back.” Tae finishes with a sigh and a tight chest. 

Jimin rubs at Jungkooks legs overtop the sweats. “Goodness, I hate even thinking about him going through that.” He looks up to Tae then, a look a remorse on his face. “I’m sorry for just barging over here, especially if it made Jungkook panic more. I was just so worried Tae, the way your voice sounded when you dropped the call…my instincts were going haywire and I just needed to see for myself he was alright.” 

Tae can understand the feeling and will in no way hold it against the vampire. Jungkooks brows furrow in his sleep and he grips at the fabric at Taes pants before releasing it and relaxing back into his dream. Tae brushes at the youngers brow, hoping the human can remain at peace at least while he sleeps. 

They watch the characters on the screen for a moment before Jimin starts up again. 

“Jin hyung was thinking it might be smart to get Jungkook out of here.”

“What? What do you mean?” 

“Just to the house by the lake. Nothing too crazy. Jin looked it up and Jungkook doesn’t have classes next Monday or Tuesday, that’ll be after midterms too and I think it could be good for him to have a real break. We all could go up for a few days over the weekend and make sure Kookie gets some good rest and all his meals…” Jimin smiles sweetly, looking to Tae for his reaction. 

He thinks about it for a moment. It could be really good, and they all would be able to keep an eye on Jungkook during that time as well. “If Jungkook agrees I say we do it.” Tae decides, feeling something akin to hope for a plan of helping the human. 

~~~

Tae ended up staying the night with Jungkook. And the night after that. Both times on the couch to give Jungkook his privacy and he stuck around while the human worked on homework too. Having the wolf there, constantly, made it impossible for Jungkook to fall back into the black pit that was calling his name so loudly.

He is grateful for the company though, goodness is he grateful for Tae. He’s grateful for the tight grip the wolf has on him, keeping the younger from slipping. It’s like one elongated sleepover and though it was nice to have Jimin here the first day, Jungkooks asked it only be Tae for the time being. He feels terrible for the decision but pretending to be okay for more than one person right now seems far too exhausting. 

Tae has mentioned a few times that the others would like to go on a trip after midterms and Jungkook hasn’t found it in himself to say no. He just hopes that by the weekend he can feel close enough to a functioning human being to be around them all.

Jungkooks reluctantly returned to work (which he surprisingly hasn’t been fired from either job yet) and school and the second night in a row that he came home late from his shift from the bar smelling like alcohol but obviously not having had a single drink it was easy for Taehyung to put two and two together. Tae is painfully obvious about not liking the fact that Jungkook works two jobs and while it was something Jungkook was trying so hard to hide from the other…there’s some sort of relief at Tae knowing. Just as long as he keeps his promise to not tell the others. 

The wolf has taken to picking the human up from his shifts and from the library and having food ready for the two of them when they get home. They have a movie night every night and when Jungkook can finally fall asleep Tae helps him into bed. It all feels too sweet and like a dream…Jungkook is just waiting for it to end. He has to remind himself that Tae has to go back to his own life at some point. This isn’t permanent. 

Tae’s tried to talk to him about what’s happened but any time the bath situation or the panic attacks are brought up, Jungkook can’t help but feel his defenses rise. The panic attacks have lessoned with Tae here but with every minute that passes the human can feel himself slipping into something maybe even more dangerous….numbness. 

He felt the numbness one night when he burned his hand on a heated pot and didn’t react. Tae witnessed the whole thing unfortunately and made a big deal out of wrapping up the humans hand, frowning at the scars from previous injuries already there. He vaguely remembers Tae seeing his wrists in the bath but once again, the human does whatever he can to avoid the topic and doesn't ever plan to approach it again. 

Jungkook doesn’t know what to do with himself truthfully. It scares him what he’s capable when he’s alone and not thinking straight. He can’t even tell if his thoughts are all his own these days, hard to tell if he really is improving with the supervision or if it’s only delaying the inevitable. 

He feels guilt most of all, when the numbness subsides of course, and it’s all encompassing. Yugyeom is as always supportive and present but its different with Tae and Jungkook can’t tell if that just makes the guilt worse. It doesn’t change the fact that Jungkook thinks he’s waste of space and breath for both Yug and Tae. Doesn’t change the fact that it’s taking everything in him to just make it through the day, even if it’s in a daze. 

“Jungkook!” His name gets called out, startling the human out of his thoughts and harshly bringing his mind back to the present. “Jungkook!” 

He shakes his head to get rid of lingering thoughts before moving to the counter to grab his and Taes coffee’s from the barista calling out to him. He felt bad for the wolf cooking all meals for him and thought this was the least he could do when he got let out of class early. 

He bows to the worker before turning for the exit with both cups in his hands. As he gets to the door he realizes it's a pull and he stands confused at how he’s going to get it open with both hands occupied. 

Someone coming in from outside gets it for him and his ‘thank you’ dies on his lips when he recognizes who it is holding it open.

“Jungkook?” 

The human almost drops his coffee at seeing who stands before him. It feels like it’s been ages, or even longer. JB’s eyes are wide until a warm and familiar smile replaces his shock. 

“Man, is it good to see you Pup.” 

Jungkook can’t help but smile, especially with the others being so contagious. 

“Hi hyung…” He nods his head slightly to the elder. “It’s good to see you too.” 

JB’s smile widens at the words then it falters slightly at seeing two cups in the youngers hands. “Are you in a rush right now?” 

“Ah uh no hyung I was…” How could he even begin to explain this? ‘I was taking this to the one guy that hit me with his motorcycle because a few days ago I had a mental breakdown and he doesn’t trust me to be alone anymore so I thought coffee was a good way to pay him back for the hours he’s wasted being with me.’ Yeah that wouldn’t go over so well. “I’m not in a rush.” He decides on. 

“Do you mind if we sit? Just for a moment?” JB asks, already eying the room for a good table. 

“Sure, we can sit.” Jungkook follows the wolf to sit down and he fiddles with his now empty hands. 

“How are you doing pup? How have you been?” Jungkook can tell the other is biting his tongue from going overboard. He knows that he looks a bit worse for wear these days. When it comes to food, his appetite has been terrible and only when he’s supposed to be in the shower is he allowed a moment to lose his stomach in the toilet without alerting Tae. Feigning sleep is a little easier but still Taehyung can tell just by the dark circles under the humans eyes that it isn’t deep or really real. 

“I’m doing alright JB, I’m almost finished with midterms.” He says with a smile. Barely passing more like it, he’s just grateful there’s only one more project to deal with.

“That’s good Kookie, I’m proud of you for sticking through.” JB says, smile slightly wavering, he seems almost reluctant to ask his next question but decides to anyways. “Your scent is off pup, have you…are you in a low place right now?”

His honesty and bluntness almost startles the younger, then he remembers that JB has had his own battles with such things. 

“I’m hanging in there the best I can.” Jungkooks surprised at his own honesty. “I’m not alone hyung so you don’t have to worry.” He adds, knowing that JB would appreciate knowing. 

“That’s good, that’s really good Kook.” JB nods his head along with his words. “Is it alright that I tell the others that? We’ve all been thinking about you.” 

Jungkook smiles but looks down, away from the others gaze. “Of course hyung.”

JB smiles back at him but a quick glance up shows the human that the expression doesn’t reach the others eyes. 

“You probably have somewhere you’ve got to be pup so I’ll let you go. Is there…a chance we can see you soon?” JB says with clear hope pushing each word. 

Jungkook lightly traces the design on the outside of the coffee cup. “Yeah, soon.” He finally makes eye contact with the other, feeling himself nod along to the words. They’ve been so gracious, more than gracious about giving him his space. 

“Great, I’ve really missed you.” This smile does reach JB’s eyes and he stands to give the younger a hug to which Jungkook melts into. He’s missed his hyungs comforting scent, his warm hugs and caring nature. 

“I’ve missed you too. I’m sorry.” Jungkook mumbles into the others coat and JB pulls back quickly at his words. 

“Hey, no apologies got it?” JB slightly shakes the younger by his shoulders evoking a tiny giggle. 

“Okay.” Jungkooks own smile feels wider too. 

“Now get out of here pup before I refuse to let you out of my sight again.” JB takes a step back after ruffling up the humans hair. 

They say their goodbyes and Jungkook leaves the coffee shop with a little more life in his step. 

Chapter Text

Walking out of his last art critique lifts a massive weight from off Jungkooks shoulders. He’s officially finally in his break and it feels amazing, as if some form of freedom no matter how temporary it is has been granted to him. 

The Kims want to celebrate him getting through half the semester and like Tae has talked about they’ve decided to head out to a cabin they own in the forest. Jungkook tried telling them it wasn’t a big deal but by the look of Jins offended face he folded quickly, agreeing to let them treat him with the trip and dinner. 

Tae is in the parking lot, as promised, waiting for the human. The sun setting on his wavy locks looks ethereal and Jungkooks breath catches not just from the cold weather. An intense feeling of endeaarance hits, filling him with a sense of love for the other. 

No matter how hard he tries he’ll never be able to repay the wolf for the amount of love and care he’s given the human in just the past week. Jungkook still wonders why Tae has stuck around so much but no matter how much he questions it, having another presence in the small apartment has felt so…domestic, like a daydream turned reality. 

Tae sees him from across the way and a boxy smile appears on his face. He waves excitedly, scarf almost whipping his face with the movement. 

“Hey bun! How did it go?” Tae jogs the last of the distance between them and pulls Jungkook into a warm chamomile smelling embrace. 

“I’ll get the official feedback for it over the weekend.” Jungkook pulls back and blows into his hands to get some warmth in them. “I think my professor will give me a good grade for it though.” 

Tae grabs the others hands, frowning at the red digits and Jungkook remembers the gloves Tae left for him at the door to take that he earlier blatantly forgot. 

“Well he should, you put your heart and soul into that project. If he gives you any grief just say the word and I’ll deal with him.” Tae smiles and kisses the pads of the humans fingers making butterflies come alive in the humans stomach. 

“Now let’s get going before your precious artist hands freeze off. Your bags are already in the back.” He says, pulling Jungkook along to the car. 

The drive to the Kim’s is peaceful and Tae tells him stories of the cabin and days he and the others have had there. Stories of Namjoon breaking doors, Jin and Yoongi going fishing, drunken escapades with Jimin and fireworks. He speaks of the others so fondly and Jungkook feels honored to be invited to something that seems so personal and precious. 

When they get to the Kims house the sun is threatening to lower below the skyline. They probably have about half an hour left of light for their drive to the cabin. If only his art critique hadn’t taken so long…they would’ve been able to drive more safely in the light. 

And that’s the thing. They’re taking a roadtrip. Jungkook has refused to let his mind wander to what that means. With all his projects and exams and work shifts he didn’t have time to think more deeply about that but now he’s facing hours in the car to reach their destination and he knows he’s one wondering thought away from a full on freak out. 

The others are already outside and are packing two cars up with their suitcases, equally as bundled up as Tae. Jungkook thumbs at the white pill in his pocket. He’s long ran out of anxiety medication, and it’s been even longer since he’s been out of his antidepressants, but he’s held onto two last pills for emergencies. This might just be the time to use one. 

What holds him in his hesitation, outside of only having two left, is knowing how the medicine effects him. When he was taking it regularly he was constantly drowsy, out of it, and lost a lot of weight that he couldn’t afford to lose especially with the stronger pills his therapist at the time prescribed him with. Jungkook has to admit it helped though, the panic attacks, the debilitating anxiety…it kept it all at bay. Now without the medicine to help he’s been coping even though Yugyeom would argue it’s not a "healthy” coping. He’s getting through and that’s all that matters. 

Now stuck in a position of most definitely needing the extra help from the stupid tiny pill, he really doesn’t want to be obviously on something and out of it around the others. 

Jungkook doesn’t realize he’s staring till a gentle hand rubs over his knee. His eyes meet Taes worried ones. 

“You alright baby?” Taes gaze is locked on his and the world around them disappears, leaving the two of them in their own solitude. Jungkook takes in a shaky breath and wonders what’s making his heart beat more frantically, the prospect of being in a car for hours or the man sitting right in front of him. 

Jungkook doesn’t trust his voice and hums with a nod in agreement instead. 

“You sure sweetheart?” Tae tilts his head in a deciding manner before bringing a warm hand to rest against the youngers chest. “Your heart seems to be giving you away there bun.” 

Embarrassed, Jungkook quickly moves to unclasp his seatbelt. “I’m fine hyung.” His hair does nothing to cover his red cheeks. “Who says it doesn’t always beat that fast?”

“If that’s so I think we may need to schedule an appointment with a doctor.” Tae jokes but his voice doesn’t sell it. He sounds too worried. 

Taehyungs hands cover Jungkooks shaking ones and undoes his seatbelt for him when the human suddenly is physically incapable of doing it himself. Goodness is this pathetic. 

‘This isn’t like the last time Kook’ Yugyeom says from the back. Jungkook can’t see the other, but can imagine the softness in his features. He looks at the Kims outside again, feeling the panic inside double.  

Jungkook pulls at the worn fabric of his sleeves. “I know.” The words are whispered from the humans mouth and Tae cocks his head in confusion. 

Jungkook shakes out of his thoughts and smiles at Tae. “I’ll be fine hyung.” 

Tae brushes aside his hair from Jungkooks face and doesn’t bother to hide the frown on his lips. “Baby what’s going on in that head of yours?” 

“Its nothing, really. I guess I’m still in midterms mode and my brain hasn’t caught up that I’m finished.” Jungkook sneaks a look to the back seat just in time to catch Yug rolling his eyes. 

‘Jungkook I swear, just talk to him!’ Yugyeom makes show of shaking his fists and Jungkook holds back from swatting at the other. 

“Are you sure that’s it?” Taehyung leans to the side to be more in the youngers eye sight. 

“Honest.” 

~~~

“We’re going to take two cars.” Namjoon sets another bag into the trunk before grabbing Jungkook’s duffle. “Do you know who you’d like to go with Kook ah? Yoongi hyung will be driving the first car and Jimin ah will drive the second one.” Namjoon says softly. Since Tae brought Jungkook to meet up with the others they all have been talking so gently, almost like the youngest is on the verge of breaking. 

He is. Taes brain so helpfully supplies. He quickly shakes that thought away. 

While the option to make a choice is of course sweet from their hyung, Taehyung can immediately see how overwhelming the question is for their baby. Jungkook pulls at his sleeves again and his eyes dart from car to car. He’s been skittish ever since they got here and it makes the wolf worried that he did something wrong. The human went from being at ease and relieved about his last midterm being finished to being completely on edge and on the verge of panic. 

“I-I don’t,” Jungkook takes a shallow breath. “What does hyung want?” He finally looks Namjoon in the eye almost in fear. The elders eyebrows furrow in concern and he looks about ready to lunge forward to embrace the kid. 

Taehyung quickly grabs onto Jungkooks hands just as the fingers begin to move up past his sleeves to his wrists. Tae has noticed the habit over the past week in moments of intense emotion hitting the younger. They have to be more careful around him, especially now. 

“Come with me baby okay? We’re going to go in Jimins car.” Tae begins to direct Jungkook away from his panic. “We have the best snacks in there.” He whispers in the humans ear before sending a comforting look back towards Namjoon who still stands in shock. 

Jungkook is almost like a doll as Taehyung helps him into the back seat and buckles the seatbelt for him. His breathing is still a little too fast to be comfortable but Taehyung hopes he soon can relax once they get moving. 

“Taehyung yah.” Namjoon calls out from where he still stands by the second car. 

Not wanting to leave Jungkook alone Jimin comes at the perfect time. “My Kookie!” The blonde says excitedly, but still reads the vibe and keeps his voice down low. Jimin sends Tae a look and nods towards the others in a subtle ‘I got him’. 

His hyungs have joined Namjoon by the trunk of the other car and look eager to speak with him. Taehyung sighs through his steps, already feeling an ache at not being right next to his human. 

“How is he?” Jin wastes no time in asking. 

Taehyung rubs a hand over his face. “He’s been doing better and seems more like himself today. On the way here something shifted though. I think he’s really sensitive right now. Choices seem to be hard when he’s feeling like this.” 

Being with the human on and off throughout the past week has opened Taes eyes so much more to what it is Jungkooks been hiding. He of course doesn’t have all the pieces yet but it’s enough to know that he can’t brush all the warning signs aside. 

Jungkook is good at pretending, a little too good and though his persona of ‘okay’ slips Taehyung knows he still needs to be attentive and careful. Jungkook has these nights where he can’t sleep, scratch that almost every night, and moments where he dissociates completely and when he comes out of it its almost like he didn’t even realize it happened.

Tae hasn’t had a chance to talk to Jungkook about his wrists or anything else for that matter regarding the youngers health outside of eating and sleeping. He worries about pushing Jungkook away by prying too much, but worries even more that Jungkook doesn’t know his own limits. 

He however has made it painfully clear to the human that he does not approve of him having a second job at the bar. Tae is trying, oh is he trying, to be supportive of Jungkooks choices but this one seems a bit too far. Tae would quit for the younger in an instant if it wouldn’t be crossing the humans boundaries. 

Tae looks back to see Jimin chatting away about something, keeping Jungkook distracted for the moment. 

“I’m sorry about earlier Tae, I didn’t mean to make him panic like that.” Namjoon says sullenly and by the look in his eyes Taehyung knows he’ll probably beat himself up for it throughout the whole drive. 

“Earlier? What happened earlier?” Jin says, quick to bring out the worrisome hen mother in him. 

“Namjoon just asked which car Jungkook would like to go into and he started to panic. He seemed…scared to make the wrong choice.” Remembering the fear in the boys eyes as he looked to Namjoon in that moment only solidifies Taes theory. 

“Well this trip is so that he doesn’t have to think about tough things right? So let’s just make it as easy as possible for him.” Hobi adds with a smile, but the way he pinches the back of his neck betrays his true feelings on the matter. “Do you think a roadtrip was a bad idea?” He says a little softer, attention solely directed to Namjoon.

They way the two of them look at each other it’s like being on the outside of a very personal moment no one else is clued in on. 

“Is there something wrong with Jungkook and roadtrips?” Tae butts in, protectiveness for the human overriding his manners. 

“If Jungkook says he’s fine with it then we have to trust him and his ability to make his own decisions.” Namjoon says decidedly, the pack leader in him making an appearance and that’s that. 

Taes irritation at being so far in the dark eats at him. Hobi even keeps his gaze away from the three of them. 

“Okay!” Jin clasps his hands together, interrupting the sudden sullen air around them. “Lets finish packing up the cars and get on the road. I feel like the sooner we get there the sooner Jungkook will be able to feel at ease.” 

Tae nods quickly, grateful to be able to get back to Jungkook after sending Namjoon a look. 

Jimin is still by Jungkooks side and handing him a bottle of water. Walking up to the two of them Tae sees Jungkook slip a white pill into his mouth and washes it down. Tae hastens his steps, multiple questions on his lips that stay sealed as he sees Jungkooks pale face and Jimins intense worry that he isn’t even trying to hide at this point.

Jimin moves to the side once Tae is close and allows the wolf to kneel in his place. 

“Hey baby.” Tae says softly, cautiously. 

Jungkooks brown eyes lock with his and Tae can tell the panic is still there, along with somewhat of a faraway gaze. 

“Why don’t we stay here for the weekend bun.” Tae rubs at the humans knee, trying his best to keep his expression comforting. Jungkooks already feeling so much, he doesn’t need to feel Taes emotions on top of that. 

Once the words register the humans brows dart up. “What? Hyung I’m okay. You all have been looking forward to going so bad.” The sincerity is something Tae loves so much in Jungkook, but he’s able to see now just how much that tends to rule out over the humans own well being. 

“We all just want to spend time with you, it doesn’t matter where baby.” Tae smiles and holds Jungkooks hand in his, gauging for a reaction if touch is too much right now. 

“But I…I don’t want to ruin the trip. They’ll all be so disappointed.” The last part is whispered under his breath. 

“The others? Baby, the only reason we’ve been so excited is because it meant we would get to be with you, that’s all we wanted.” Out of the corner of his eye he can see the others finish with packing up and Yoongi emerges from the house being the last mate they were waiting on. 

“I-I want to go though.” Jungkook says but his pout makes the words come out more like a whine. 

“Maybe we’ll just have to push it off for another time, that’s perfectly fine.” Tae tries again. 

“No, I want to go. I want to hyung, it’s okay.” Jungkook says, blinking through the panicked fog and allowing more clarity to shine through his eyes. 

Tae sighs, part of him wanting to unbuckle Jungkook and take him inside and cuddle him for the rest of the night, but then Namjoons words come back to him. They have to trust Jungkook and his ability to make his own decisions. Tae can’t make them for him. 

“Only if you promise bun.” He says after a beat, resigned. “If at any moment you want us to turn back we will do it.” Jungkook nods and smiles for probably the first time since getting here. 

Hobi comes over and beams brightly at Jungkook. “Hey JungKookie.” Tae takes the moment to stand and allows Hobi to take his place.

“I’ll be right back baby, and then I’ll come sit next to you alright?” He smiles at Jungkook and gets a nod in return. Hobi takes the signal to start excitedly talking to the younger. 

Tae grabs Jimins arm and pulls him out of earshot from the human. “What medicine did Jungkook take?” He winces at how demanding his voice sounds to his own ears. 

Jimin sighs and a tiredness sinks his shoulders. “Tae he was so scared. He made me promise to watch the road while I drive, I think it really makes him nervous, terrified more like it.” Jimin runs a hand through his hair with a sigh. “It was probably some type of anxiety medication, at least that’s what it looked like. It might be to help calm him down? I don’t know. Have you seen him take anything like that while you’ve been staying with him?”

“No, nothing. But he could’ve been taking it when I wasn’t with him. Goodness Jimin, I don’t know what to do to help him. I really don’t and it’s tearing me apart.” Tae clenches his hands to stop them from doing something stupid like pulling his hair out. 

“Alright, the longer we sit here and talk the longer we’ll be pushing things off. If Jungkook says he wants to go then we’ll go. I’ll update the others and then we should get going.” Jimin puts a hand on Taes shoulder to pull his attention back from looking at Jungkook. “Sit with your human okay? I’ll be there in just a few minutes and then we can head out. I think Hobi will be coming in our car too,” They both look at said wolf. “I don’t think he’s going to be wanting to leave Jungkook out of his sight anytime soon.”

Jimin runs off to the others and Tae takes a breath of relief at not having to be the one to talk to them about everything. He quickly slides into the car and takes the seat next to Jungkook, slightly startling the human with his presence. Hobi smiles and squeezes Jungkooks hand before letting it go. 

Already Tae can tell Jungkook is a bit calmer and his brown eyes have a ring of sleepiness to them that wasn’t there before. Being on the verge of panic like he was probably took it out of him too. Tae buckles himself in before brushing aside Jungkooks bangs. “Do you want to rest your head on me baby?” 

Jungkook blinks a few times before nodding his head and placing it down on the wolfs shoulder. 

“Just close your eyes okay? I’m right here.” 

~~~

Jungkooks not sure where the determination to agree to coming here came from. Maybe it was the fear of disappointment, maybe it was just simply wanting to choose something for himself…maybe it was…who knows. But he’s here now and facing the fact of driving back home will possibly prove to be too much and he already took the one pill he brought. Damn is he stupid. 

He slept for almost all of the drive and the times he did wake up Tae was there to play with his hair and send him back into his dreams. Jungkook’s grateful none of the dreams turned into nightmares even though they all were centered on the past. He gladly is going to take that over being awake and aware for the whole drive, even if embarrassment will hit hard when he thinks back on it. 

He caught low murmurs from the others but other than that he couldn’t catch much of their conversations. He did however hear his own name once or twice. It makes him nervous. 

Waking up to Tae gently shaking his shoulder, Jungkook is surprised to see they’re already at the house. The sun is long gone and the place is only illuminated by the moon and stars. 

Jungkook rubs at his eyes and stretches out his neck, trying to will away the drowsiness that clings tight onto him. 

The door next to him opens, startling him, only for Namjoon to be on the other side. 

“You guys all doing okay?” He asks but his gaze remains solely on the human.

Jungkook yawns in place of an answer. Man does he feel exhausted. 

“Come on Kook, let’s get you inside and get some food in you then you can sleep.” Tae runs his hand through Jungkooks hair once again, almost sending him straight back into sleep at the touch. 

“Tae could I actually show Jungkook something?” Namjoon speaks up, jolting Jungkook from the almost doze he was falling into. “We’ll only be a minute then I’ll bring him in to eat.” 

Tae stops playing with the youngers hair which makes Jungkook pout. “You alright with that baby?” He nods and smiles gratefully as Tae unbuckles his seatbelt.

The relief is instant the moment Jungkook is out of the car and he takes what feels like his first full breath in hours. The air outside is fresh and has a slight chill to it that nips at his exposed skin. 

“Why don’t you come check out the water with me Kook?” Namjoon offers out a hand and Jungkook takes it gratefully, not realizing his mind starting to float without Taes contact. 

“Ill see you inside baby.” Tae runs his hand through Jungkooks hair once more before giving Namjoon a look, even in the darkness of the night, communicating through their eyes. 

“What about my bags?” Jungkook remembers, the others are out and unpacking the cars already and Jin is at the front door getting it unlocked. 

“What do you think hyungs are for?” Namjoon leans forward with a cheeky smile but quickly starts to pull the younger along at Jins “I heard that Joon!” 

“Come on Kook.” 

Underneath Jungkooks combat boots he can tell is soft grass though he can’t truly see it. He moves with the elder and can hear the slight sounds of water at a shore moving the closer they get. 

The shore is rocky and the water gives them their own personal ocean, protected and surrounded by a tree line far off in the distance. Jungkook can’t wait to see how beautiful it will look like in the daylight. 

“Do you know why I love it so much here?” Namjoon starts, grip squeezing a bit at the humans hand.

Jungkook shakes his head.

“Time is slowed down.” Namjoon looks out to the water, up at the stars and watches the sleeping world around them. His face is illuminated by the soft moonlight, sculpting his features and painting a masterpiece. “When you take a breath you can taste the spray of the water, feel the wind against your face and feel the earth breathe with you underneath your feet. Its natures personal reminder you’re a part of this world too, not just living on it.” 

Namjoon turns to look at the human and Jungkook wonders if the moonlight is as soft and sweet to his own face as well or if it only harshens the shadows that lurk there. 

“Im really proud of you coming Kook. We don’t know everything you’ve been through, or even your triggers, but we will do our absolute best with what you’re willing to share.” 

Jungkook squeezes Namjoons hand in response and looks at their feet. 

The darkness below him is abruptly bathed in light. Not a demanding or jarring light, but the kind of light that feels like taking a sip of warm tea. Turning reveals the house lights are now on and the humans breath catches at the view. There’s strung up lights that surround the framing of the cabin, which is actually more like a house, and reaches out illuminating a porch. Jungkook can see now there are large tents set up with seats and fire pits and another house on the water on the other side of them. 

Its the kind of place that would be impossible to feel anything but peace here. The kind of place that feels almost like heaven. The kind of place a person can breathe. 

Namjoon chuckles at Jungkooks awe. “Tae was right, you really hold galaxies in those eyes of yours.” He mumbles but Jungkook catches every word. Jungkook widens said eyes and begs that even with some light now the obvious blush blooming on his cheeks and ears goes unnoticed. 

Tae really said that? 

Jungkook turns back to the water, holding his free hand up to one of his ears and a smile touches his lips. Some of the lights are reflected in the ripples like fireflies living beneath the surface, dancing along to the beat of the humans heart. 

“Its really beautiful here.” He all but chokes out, not sure how to respond in any other way. 

Namjoon squeezes Jungkooks hand again. “It really is.” Jungkook can hear the smile in his voice. “Jin hyung is probably already getting dinner ready, let’s let this place feed our bellies and souls, ok Kook-ah?” 

"Okay hyung." Okay.  

Chapter Text

‘Say what you will, coming here has to be the best decision you’ve ever made.’ Yugyeom says drooling over every word and Jungkook doesn’t blame him. 

The insane amount of food laid out in front of them that the pack was able to cook in such a little amount of time is quite honestly astonishing. They’ve relocated to a table outside on the porch and the lights around them shine like twinkling stars. The weather is still a bit chilly but not as bad with the others around to keep the human warm. 

‘They even made samgyeopsal!’ Yugyeom reaches for the dish and Jungkooks hand shoots out to smack his away. 

“Hey!” Jungkook says without thinking and gets confused eyes targeted back at him from around the table. 

“Is something wrong?” Hobi asks from the side of him. 

Jungkook chides himself and glares at Yug who only has the decency to look sheepish. “I thought a bug was gonna get in the food.” He mumbles, still looking to his friend.

“A bug?” Hobi clings tightly into Jungkooks arm and his eyes dart everywhere.  

“Hobi I’m sure if a bug were really to attack, you would survive just fine.” Namjoon brings another dish to the table from inside before sitting down at the head of the table. With how Namjoon acts it’s easy to forget he’s the head alpha of the pack. He doesn’t use his title at all from what Jungkooks seen but he can tell the others all look up to him. 

Hobi turns to look into Jungkooks eyes with a simple plea of “Save me” that the human can’t ignore. 

“I’ll save you hyung.” He responds and the bone crushing hug surrounded by the others giggles make the four words more than worth it. 

“Ahh you’re so cute Jungkookie.” Hobi squeezes him tighter and Jungkook finds himself smiling along with the others’ heart shaped one. 

“Alright everyone settle down and let’s eat!” Jin says bringing the last bowl of rice and takes his seat at the table next to Namjoon. Tae is right on his heel and plops down next to Jungkook. 

Throughout dinner Tae often nudges the human to keep eating when Jungkooks mind clearly wanders as he looks at the views around him. It’s hard not to let his thoughts take him places far away from here.

Without him noticing the others have filled his bowl with rice and noodles and different pieces of meat. Even Jimin reaches across the whole table to slide him something every now and then to which the others simply smile and encourage it. 

The conversations float around the human and he is so grateful they don’t try to get him to focus long enough to become part of it. Being somewhat in a limbo and just present in body seems to be all he’s capable of now.

Before long he’s being asked if he’s had enough to eat and by the forced smile on Taes face it obviously wasn’t enough in his opinion but he’s just going to accept it for tonight. 

As the others begin to pack up the table Jin claps his hands loudly to get everyones attention. 

“Lets get a good nights sleep and tomorrow we’ve got plenty to keep us entertained here until our reservation at the restaurant. Jungkookie please don’t hesitate to ask any of us for anything at all alright sweetheart? Tae could you show him his room?” 

There’s a chorus of goodnights from the others and Jimin just about leaps over the table to give Jungkook a hug and a pat on the head before he goes. 

“Come on Jungkookie! Let me show you where you’ll be sleeping.” Tae says excitedly, jumping up from his seat and kicking off his sandals. 

“Ah Tae I told you to stop leaving those everywhere!” Jin calls out after him but Tae already has Jungkooks hand in his and is pulling him inside. Jungkook takes his own shoes off at the door and just as the sliding door closes behind him he hears Jin mumble about Jungkook being so much more civil than their ‘Tae bear’. It makes him smile. 

Somehow the inside of this place is even more beautiful than the outside of it. It’s not quite as decorated or lived in as the Kims actual home but it still has a bit of their essence in it. It still has their welcoming nature. 

His room is on the ground floor right next to the kitchen with a sliding door leading inside and Jungkook almost trips over the threshold in shock. The room alone is bigger than his apartment and his bags are already nicely placed next to the enormous bed. 

After a repetitive conversation between the human and wolf about that all being just for Jungkook and Tae reassuring that yes it is, he finally settled in, crashing onto the bed with little care of messing up the blankets with how tired he is. 

Taes laugh fills the once empty room with warmth and the human can feel the other sit onto the bed next to him where he’s sprawled. A hand starts combing through his messy locks and if Tae won’t mention the happy hum that comes from Jungkook then he won’t either. 

“It’s been a long day for you, hasn’t it bun?” Tae smiles through the words which Jungkook peaks up from the blankets to see. “Why don’t you get washed up and then you can sleep hmm?” 

The combing through his hair isn’t helping at all and though Jungkook nods he closes his eyes, snuggling deeper into the bed. That brings out a full laugh from the other. 

“Come on baby, we'll make this so quick.” Tae starts to pull at the younger and before long Jungkook finds himself in the bathroom brushing his teeth and washing his face. He doesn’t quite know how much of that he actually does on his own but all he does care about is being in his sweats and curled up back in bed by the end of it. 

“Get some sleep okay? And sleep as long as you need.” Taes voice falls over the younger like honey and the hand is back in Jungkooks hair. 

The light is turned off, leaving only a warm purple glow from a night light in the corner that Jungkook can’t bring himself to feel embarrassed about and Taes weight leaves the bed. 

A feather light kiss on the top of Jungkooks head is all he’s to be left with and Jungkook finally opens his eyes to see Tae leaving. 

Either it’s the hour, the fact that he’s already half asleep, or purely the need to not be alone right now that takes over but Jungkook speaks up before he has time to even process what he’s about to ask. 

“Tae?” Jungkook forces himself to sit up partially and Tae stops at the door. 

“Yeah sweetheart?” 

He has to ask before he loses his nerve. 

“Could you…stay with me tonight?” A beat, and then another passes and Jungkooks heart races with the moments to wait. The light isn’t enough to illuminate Taes face so the human has no tell for his response. “I mean if you-“

“I’d love to Jungkook.” Tae says quickly, stopping the other in his words. “I would love to stay with you tonight and thank you so much for asking.” He sounds thankfully happy about the request. 

“Let me go get my pjs on and I’ll be right back okay?” Tae bolts out the door. “Don’t fall asleep yet!” He yells loud enough the whole house can probably hear it. 

It’s not long before Tae returns, face fresh and soft clothes on. He flings himself onto the bed jostling it and dives under the covers next to the human. 

That night Jungkook sleeps with a smile on his face, a comforting warm presence next to him and nightmares nowhere to be seen. 

~~~

“Tae! Kook! Breakfast!” 

Jungkook groans into the plush pillows below him and the warmth of the bed threatens to drag him back into sleep for at least a few more hours. He smirks as the sound of someone getting scolded for trying to wake them up comes from the other side of their door.

A grip around his torso tightens and Jungkook looks down to see Tae wrapped tightly around him like a koala holding on for dear life. He can’t quite feel the wolfs touch yet, it’s an issue the human deals with some mornings. The presence is there but the touch is numb, even where he should feel Tae’s forearm pressed against the sliver of skin at his stomach that’s revealed from where shirt has ridden up. 

He takes a breath, then another, willing the numbness to go away and panic to stay buried. He knows it isn’t normal not being able to feel your own body at times but Jungkook doesn’t even know how he’d begin to bring this up to anyone. Jackson and Tae would severely worry, and talk of seeing a therapist would start up again which Jungkook is not ready for.

Jungkook wiggles his toes and is met with the same numbness, it’s enough for his ever so present panic to flicker to life even just for a moment. This feeling doesn’t last long but it is always so unnerving. Before Jungkook can lead himself head first into a panic attack he stares down at the sleeping features of the wolf wrapped around him. 

Tae looks so young like this. He looks like a safe place that Jungkook can’t find himself ever wanting to leave. He gently brushes aside the bangs that fell over Taes eyes and traces down his features, memorizing every freckle and line around his face. 

Deep brown eyes flutter open and Tae looks straight up into Jungkooks. 

“Hey baby.” He smiles and goodness is his voice even deeper and more gravely than usual, it makes Jungkooks stomach swoop at the sheer rumble of it. 

“Morning Tae.” Jungkook whispers back. 

“You sleep okay?” Tae asks, cuddling more into Jungkooks side. 

“Yeah I slept really well hyung.” Probably one of the best nights sleep he’s had in a while. 

“Good, I did too. You’re so comfy bun.” Tae smiles into Jungkooks shirt. 

The two of them lay there, enjoying each others presence in the comfortable silence until Jungkooks stomach decides to loudly make its hunger known, startling them both into laughter and they decide it’s time to go out for food. 

Breakfast is uneventful as everyone is still waking up…that is except for Jin and Namjoon who seem to embrace the rising sun with everything in them. Yoongi’s absence doesn’t seem to bother the others and the human notices a plate of food set aside most likely for him. It’s sweet how well they all know each other enough to do those things automatically. 

As Tae and Jungkook fill their own plates he overhears Jin telling the others about how he almost choked and died on a mango slice at the crack of dawn but with the way Jin tells the story Jungkook isn’t sure if he should laugh with the others or seriously question if they truly almost lost him. To a slice of fruit of all things. 

Even with that mild concern present, the comfort in the air is much like the night before; familiar and safe. Jungkooks glad he made the drive here. Glad he pushed himself to come. 

When Jungkook attempts to take his own finished plate to the sink and wash it Jin seems to take it personally. “Oh let hyungs do that, why don’t you go unpack your things?” Jin grabs the plates from Jungkooks hands and shoos him away quickly before pulling Tae to help with cleanup. 

Jungkook chuckles at the wolfs pout before disappearing behind his closed door back into the purple light of his room. 

‘I’ve decided we should live here.’ Yugyeom says seriously, hopping onto the king bed with no regard for the made sheets. How they got made and who made them will be forever unknown to the human. ‘No more school, no more stress. Let’s run away from everything okay?’ 

“Okay, let’s do it.” Jungkook smiles, half serious, eyeing the bed himself. He would love to just dive under the insanely soft covers and sleep away the day but he still needs to change and wash up…things he wouldn’t think twice about actually doing if he were back in his grungy cold apartment. 

‘You should tell the others about me.’ Yugyeom says it so suddenly, so instantly taking Jungkooks breath with a simple sentence. 

“About you? What do you mean?” Jungkook turns his back on the other, opting to directing his attention to unpacking and needing his hands to immediately be occupied. 

‘I’m serious Kook, you should tell them.’ 

“There’s nothing to tell.” Jungkook wrings his hands in one of his folded sweatshirts, immediate guilt hitting at the sharpness of his tone. It’s not his fault, Yugyeom should know not to bring this up. 

‘Nothing to…riiight.” Yug nods in disagreement before releasing a very pent up sigh. ‘They would want to know. They don’t know how to help you.’ Yug keeps his voice steady. 

“Help me with what Yug? I’m fine, I have you don’t I?” Jungkooks own voice rises and panic starts to creep in on him. 

‘You always have me but I’m not….Kook I’m not-‘

“I don’t need help okay?” Jungkook stares the other down, interrupting him, not wanting Yugyeom to finish that sentence, never wanting Yugyeom to finish that sentence. “Can we just drop it? I don’t want to talk about this and I’m really tired.” Yugyeom is getting tired of this, of him, he can tell. 

‘Tae and even Namjoon have said countless times how they want you to open up.’ The others voice stays steady but his volume increases just slightly. 

“They’re just being nice because that’s who they are!” They say those things but if Jungkook truly laid everything out for them…who’s to say they wouldn’t toss him aside for being too broken? 

‘I love you Jungkook but you’re an idiot.’ 

“And you’re being annoying.” Jungkook stands, furrowed brow, arms folded and probably is sporting flushed cheeks…the epitome of a toddler getting mad. 

‘Kook, please, you’re drowning and they’re right above you with a hand reached out to pull you up! The first step is taking it.’

“I don’t need to become a burden for them like I am for the Ims okay?” The sweatshirt is thrown to the ground. 

‘Goodness you’re not a-‘ 

“I have my own shit that I need to deal with on my own! If you don’t like that then you can…” Jungkooks voice catches and his heart almost stops at the words coming out of his own voice.

Yugyeoms eyes soften. ‘I can what Jungkook? Because if you were about to say that I can leave…I would never do that to you.’

Silence takes over the room enveloping the two of them. Regret fills Jungkooks body and his fingers move to his sleeves. 

‘I care about you. When are you going to get that through your thick head huh?’ Yug says and folds his arms, the tension leaves his body. ‘You’re my best friend, I never wanted to leave you in the first place.’ That last bit is said so quietly it’s like one of Yugyeoms own secrets clawing at him to not be heard. 

Shit.

“I didn’t mean that." Jungkook says a lot more quietly. "You know you’re my person Yugyeom, you always will be. Im not…I don’t know what I’m doing Yug, but if there’s anything I can do, it’s dealing with it myself. I can’t live knowing I’m making things worse for others.” Worse for Yugyeom. Jungkook rubs his hands over his face, burying into them. 

‘Jungkookie, my sweet Jungkookie, sometimes to let others truly love you, you have to show them those parts of you that you don’t know what to do with. There is no weakness in opening up.’

Jungkook pouts in silence. Feeling exhausted from the day already and its not even past noon. Exhausted from the months and years of handling it on his own and getting absolutely nowhere. Exhausted from this conversation swirling around the two of them like a whirlpool that will eventually swallow them up whole. He's just...exhausted.  

Exhausted that Yugyeom might be right. 

‘You know I’m right.’ Yug has that infuriating self satisfied smile on as he hops off the bed and stretches as if they didn’t almost just start hashing it out with each other. 

He starts to walk out the door and Jungkooks heart skips a beat. 

“Where are you going?” There’s a slight tremor layering his voice he doesn't care or attempt to hide. 

‘On a walk. Come on, some air will do us both good.’ 

Jungkook releases a breath and follows the other, just as he always will without a moment of hesitation. 

And then he follows Yugyeom straight into Taehyungs chest. 

“Woah bun where are you headed?” Taes warm hands hold onto the sides of Jungkooks arms keeping him steady.

Yugyeom has the audacity to smile at him from behind the wolf and even add a wink as a cherry on top. 

“I just wanted to get some air.” Jungkook finally looks up to Taehyung dazzling eyes and the gaze directed back at him feels like warm coffee rolling down his back, slightly startling but so welcome. 

“We heard a bit of yelling from your room, is everything okay?” He lowers his voice but Jungkook knows that the few left in the kitchen still, while seemingly ignoring their current conversation, heard every word. 

Shit. Jungkooks hands go back to his sleeves and he wishes his sweatshirt would swallow him whole. His ears heat up quickly.  

Yug sucks in his teeth with an ‘oops’ and yeah Jungkook is gonna let him have it later. 

“Was just on the phone. Everything’s alright hyung, it’s nothing to worry about.” Jungkook mumbles and and as far as cover ups go, this one sucks.

“Alright baby.” Tae smiles, but his eyes express otherwise. "Do you want me to join you with getting some air?” 

There’s an itching feeling spreading across Jungkooks skin now, pushing at him with a need to be out of this suddenly confining space. He looks into Tae’s eyes and sees an openness that’s rimmed with concern. There's something there with the other that is so inviting for the human to just fall into, to listen to Yugyeom and grab hold of Taes hand.

“Please hyung.” 

Tae grabs his hand immediately as if knowing just how trapped the younger feels and pulls him along without hesitation. “Let’s soak up some sunshine then.” 

Chapter Text

Jungkook can’t get his conversation with Yugyeom to stop running on repeat through his head. 

He rides ATV’s with Tae and Jimin and it’s all that he can focus on. They play basketball, which Taes and Yoongi’s jaws may or may not have dropped a few times at the shots that Jungkook was able to make, and still Jungkook just hears Yugyeom’s voice. 

Sitting on the porch with the pack eating fruit and feeling the sun on his cheeks, wind in his hair, Taes hand in his and watermelon on his tongue…Jungkook imagines this is what heaven would be like and then the inevitable ‘tell them” comes back at him, demanding to be heard though Yugs mouth stays closed. 

It leaves an itch that crawls through his skin, but no moment seems right. No part of him wants to cloud their sunset vacation of sweet fruit and smiles with something as heavy as what he holds inside. 

The night comes on too quickly and before long Jin announces that they need to get ready for their dinner reservation and Jungkook is once again faced with the dilemma of realizing all of his wardrobe is black which is becoming a whole other issue. Why now of all times to become self aware enough to feel slightly weirded out by it is beyond him. 

Jungkook shoves the last ‘tell them’ into the furthest corner of his mind once they pull up to dinner. At least until tomorrow he can put it off. All he has the energy for this night is to focus on getting food down and not throwing up with a whole pack to be able to catch him in the act. 

Before walking in, Tae brushes his fingers against Jungkooks. 

“You doing okay?” He whispers, allowing the others to pass them and walk in first. 

“Yeah, I’m doing great.” Jungkook smiles and quickly follows the others before Tae can read too much into him, hoping the action itself isn’t rude. 

‘By all means after you.’ Yug stands by the door, arms motioned inside for Jungkook to pass. The human gives him a well practiced look before gasping at how bougie this restaurant is. 

When Jin said they would be going somewhere nice Jungkook expected a sit down place but nothing like this. The ceilings are high rise and no joke chandeliers hang above their heads. Each table is an expensive looking wood with candles on it and the waiters are in classy white button downs and slacks. The place is warm but not in a suffocating way, more like atmospherically comforting. 

It smells like the most heavenly hug in the form of good food. 

Jungkook is actually for once grateful for his clothes matching the vibe of this place.

A hand intertwines with his. “Come on Kook, let’s join the others.” Tae smiles, knowing Jungkook most likely is freaking out inside. 

Tae drags him along and Jungkook tries to simply soak it all in. 

Once they sit at their table a waiter fills up their water glasses and sets out a basket of freshly baked steaming bread. Jungkook looks down at his menu and immediately feels his soul leave his body. He quickly leans over to Tae, avoiding the gazes of the others. 

“Hyung I can’t…afford this place…” Jungkook whispers and swears he sees Jimin smile into his glass across the table. 

Tae laughs, a classic rich ha ha sounding laugh. 

“Silly bunny, you’re not paying for a single thing.” He ruffles the humans hair before smoothing it back into place. “Let your hyungs take care of you hmm?” 

Feeling his face practically burst into flames with how much he's blushing all the human can do is nod, not trusting his voice with how the wolf is looking at him like that. 

~~~

While they wait for their food Jungkook leaves the table to go to the bathroom. Declining Taes offer to come with him in the moment felt right but now he wishes the wolf were beside him. 

“Well aren’t you a sweet thing.” A honey like voice grabs Jungkooks attention as he exits the bathroom and leads it to a man leaning against the hallway wall. He’s tall and handsome and has a kind of look to him that oozes confidence. He's dressed in a way that shows he feels at ease in a place like this. Jungkook immediately allows his guard to go up. 

“Excuse me?” There’s no way the human heard him correctly. 

“I’m sorry, my mouth tends to move before my brain can tell it to stop.” The mans smile is blinding. His eyes are bright to match and equally intense. “I noticed you a little earlier and just had to come talk to you and see if you were as adorable up close.” He takes a step towards the other, almost walking him straight into the opposite wall. “You are.” He chuckles and looks away, the first sign of shyness hitting him. 

“Um…my friends are waiting for me.” Jungkook bows slightly, just wanting to get back to his hyungs. The way the man is looking at him sends an uncomfortable chill down his spine.

“So you are taken huh. What a shame.” The man is closer now and he places a hand on the humans arm. Its a touch so opposite of Taes and burns where contact is made. “If you ever find yourself lonely I would be happy to be a friend to you…” He tilts his head, waiting for Jungkooks name most likely but it’s the last thing the human wants to give. 

“I really got to get back.” All it takes is a step away and the grip on his arm is gone.

"Well then, until we meet again." The mans words almost freeze the human in place but Jungkook retreats quickly heading to his table. He can feel the mans eyes on him with every step. 

Tae makes eye contact with him across the restaurant and the human can feel warmth flooding through him. An instant relief hits and he has to restrain from running across the restaurant to get to his wolf. 

“You okay baby?” Tae asks as soon as Jungkook is back by his side. He plays with the hair at Jungkooks nape and the action sends a different sort of chill through the human, this one much more welcome. “You look a little off.”

“Just missed you hyung.” Jungkook says, leaning into the others touch. 

“Ahhh you’re so cute bunny.” Tae leans forward and before Jungkook has even a second to process there’s a kiss being placed on his forehead. Jungkooks eyes open as wide as saucers and Tae only chuckles before returning his attention to the table leaving Jungkook absolutely at a loss for words.

Taehyung just kissed his forehead, in front of the others and not while the human is in emotional distress. This has to mean something, or absolutely nothing and Jungkook is simply a simp and delusional. The way his stomach flips when Taehyungs hand moves to rest on his knee instead doesn’t help whatsoever. He is really screwed over for this man. 

~~~

Dinner goes on, which is worth every guilty penny with how it tastes, and Jungkook beams in the slight buzz from the glass of Suja that is finally taking effect. Being with this pack is like sitting in a warm beam of sun for an afternoon nap. It feels like home and it’s a place he never wants to leave. 

Hobi’s in the middle of some elaborate story of how he once got caught by the police during his graffiti days, which Jungkook did not know that those days even existed so that was a shock in itself, when Tae’s hand on Jungkook’s knee grips tighter as his whole body stiffens. 

“Hyung.” Tae looks over the human to get Namjoons attention. Once the older wolf sees what the younger sees the happy look on his face falls. His sweet and kind eyes turn into something more menacing and his arm comes around the humans shoulders protectively. 

“They shouldn’t be here.” Namjoon says lowly and all Jungkook knows is that he would hate to be on the receiving end of that growl and glare. 

Jungkook looks over to see the reason for the change of demeanor and sees that guy who tried to talk to him earlier. He’s at a table across the room laughing easily with his friends. As if sensing the heavy looks on him, turns to send the human a wink. 

Taehyung growls and would probably leap from his seat if Yoongi wasn’t holding him down. 

The man’s earlier friendliness seems sour now just at the motion. 

“Should we leave Joon?” The eldest asks, waiting for the all clear from their alpha. The whole table is now at attention and waits for the word to bolt. 

“As long as they stay away from us we should be fine.” Namjoon continues without tearing his gaze from the people in question. “Any sign of trouble and you get Jungkook out of here alright Taehyung?” Taehyung. Jungkook has never heard Namjoon use the youngers full name like that. 

“Are we in danger hyung?” Jungkook says quietly and the man smirks back at them, as if he could hear their conversation. Taehyung is quick to reassure and comfort the human, holding his hand and looking into his eyes. 

“No baby, your hyung’s got you alright. You’re never in danger as long as we’re around.” 

“He’s right, you’re safe with us and have nothing to worry about.” Namjoon smiles sweetly and brushes a hand over Jungkooks knuckles before looking back to the group across the restaurant. 

Jungkook turns into Tae. “He didn’t seem too dangerous when I met him.” He says lowly, trying not to attract the attention of the whole table but does exactly that. 

“He what?” Taes expression tells Jungkook immediately he should’ve kept his mouth shut. 

“When you…Jungkook did he talk to you?” Jin is using full names too. The human feels his heart speed up, like a kid being caught by his parents for sneaking out. 

“Just for a moment, it was before you all saw him.” Jungkook stammers over his words. “I was just coming back from the bathroom when he stopped me.” 

“What did he want?” Yoongi interrogates, harshness enunciated in each word. 

“He didn’t want anything…” Jungkook closes in on himself. 

“Did he say anything baby?” Jimin places a hand on Yoongi and asks in a calmer sweeter voice. 

“I think he just wanted to know my name. I thought he was…flirting with me.” The human says and a blush dusts his cheeks. “I turned him away telling him I was here with you all.” 

“You did nothing wrong love.” Tae rubs a comforting hand up and down the youngers back. 

“What do you think this means?” Hobi asks the others. 

“I don’t know, but I don’t like that he talked to Jungkook.” Namjoon scowls. "I really don't like it." 

Chapter Text

The drive back from dinner is a blur and Jungkook doesn’t know if he should blame that on the alcohol or the fact of being in a car again. At least the drink in his veins dulled some of his senses. It reminds Jungkook why he drinks too much sometimes. 

He was hoping Tae would chalk his odd behavior to the Suju but that hope is diminished when he asks Jungkook to walk with him as soon as they get back to the house. 

When Tae leads him to a hammock under the twinkling lights asking if they can talk he knows it’s more serious than just a nighttime stroll.

Yug giving him a look only confirms it.

The minutes trickle away as Jungkook gets lost in his own mind. His thoughts jump from one scenario to another of what Tae could possibly want to talk about. Could it be about that man at the restaurant? Could it be about Jungkooks behavior? Could Tae be done with him? Could all the others? 

When he comes back to himself it’s to be in the hammock with Tae. While the hammock itself is large it doesn’t take much effort to shift and allow the others arm to wrap around him. Beneath his head lays Taes chest and his heartbeat becomes all Jungkook can hear.

It’s grounding. It’s stabilizing. It’s quickly becoming his new home. 

Goodness how on earth can he even begin to tell Tae everything going on inside his wreck of a brain? Inside his damaged body and broken heart?

The wolfs warmth envelopes him even more as he holds Jungkook tighter, if that’s possible. 

“Are you with me Jungkook?” Tae whispers into his hair. Jungkook nods, wondering just how long Taes been questioning that. 

He kisses the side of Jungkooks head where he lays. “You’re thinking too loud baby.” The kiss lets him know it’s not a scolding. “What’s going through that head of yours?” The words are soft, just above a whisper now. 

“I’m sorry.” Jungkook starts. Anxiety eats at him, burns a hole through his chest but he somehow still chokes the words out. Through his blurry thoughts that aren’t so pleasantly buzzed anymore he knows he has to try, if not for himself then for Tae. For Yugyeom. 

“What on earth do you have to say sorry for Kook?” Tae responds sincerely and shocked. 

“I’m sorry that I’m a lot, that I haven’t opened up with you.” 

Taehyung stops his rubbing into Jungkooks arm and the human braces for him to leave, to agree, anything but what he ends up saying. 

Tae sits up a bit and looks the human in the eyes. “You never have to apologize to me Jungkook. Never, and you have nothing to apologize for.” Even in the dim light Jungkook can see the earnestness in the others eyes. “And I will never force you to open up about anything okay? That is completely your choice and I’ll stay by your side whether you do or don’t. I will stay by your side no matter what.” The wolfs words ease something within the human, dissipating his fear knowing it’s of his own accord that he moves forward with the conversation. “I…want you to open up with me. I know that there’s things that you haven’t told me, things that are weighing you down…but if you decide to keep that inside that’s okay.” 

Jungkook takes a breath, feeling he owes it, owes something, to the other for his patience…for everything. “I have…hard days sometimes.” He starts, looking down at where the wolf is still holding tight to him. “I think I’m broken in a lot of ways and I feel like I’m just a burden most of the time.” He says, sounding silly to his own ears. 

Tae doesn’t speak but by the stillness of his breath and way he grips a little tighter to the human expresses enough. 

“There’s some…” He can’t look Tae in the eye. “trauma in my past that I’m scared I’ll never be able to overcome. I’m scared that it’s part of me now.” The words begin to not feel real coming from Jungkooks lips. The way they don’t any time he approaches this topic. “I haven’t been able to handle it well at all. I…I lost someone…” he chokes on the words even though they feel like someone else speaking. They feel like something someone else went through. The pain so intense he can’t even feel it. Can’t feel anything past the numbness that fills his chest. 

He pinches at the skin on his arm. “And I’m-I…” stuttering, he wills his words to continue, each one detaching him further from himself. Pinching turns to nails digging in. “I’m sacred I’ll never be okay with that…never be more than that.” He doesn’t know when he started whispering but every hushed word pulls at his throat, clawing on its way out never wanting to be heard. “I don’t know how to be okay with any of it.” He keeps his eyes down, refusing to see the distain in the others face. 

Tae takes a shuddering breath and rubs at the humans arm where he’s held, then his hand moves down and pulls Jungkooks fingers away from abusing his skin and holds them so gently. “Thank you for opening up to me Jungkook.” He starts, and there’s something funny in his voice. “You are so brave and strong and I am so proud of you.” 

Jungkook can’t help the way his gaze darts up in surprise at the words, doe eyes in full view for the other. 

“I am so sorry for the pain you’ve been through and the person you lost, I don’t have any words to make that better.” A tear falls from Taes eye. He pulls Jungkook in tighter, hands gripping on like it’s the only thing that can keep himself together. “That must be so painful and hard to be going through and I am so proud of you. I’m proud of you for waking up each morning and being here. You are so much more than the pain you’ve been through. It’s a part of your story but it will never define you. You are so incredibly strong and that’s what I see when I look at you.” 

Tae leans back, pulling Jungkooks gaze up to his. His sweet loving eyes have never held so much pain and sadness in them before and Jungkook decides he wants to make sure that look is never seen in the wolfs face again. “I want you to understand that I accept every part of you. You’re not too much for me to handle, you will never be a burden for me and most importantly you are not broken. You don’t have to be okay to be loved Jungkook. You are so incredibly beautiful.” His hands gently pull Jungkooks bangs behind his ear. “It’s very important that you understand this Jungkook,” He smiles at the younger. “because I love you so much.”

Tae…loves him? 

Jungkook can’t hold back a gasp and he buries his face into Tae’s shirt, feeling ridiculous and stupid and completely and utterly…loved. 

Guilt tries to sneak it’s way in but Tae holds him close, rubs a comforting hand up and down the humans back and presses a kiss into Jungkooks crown. “I am so proud of you for being here.” 

The choice of words from the wolf means more to Jungkook than he will ever know. 

After a moment of Tae letting Jungkook lay there, soaking in the love, he speaks up again. His words are soft and kind, just like Tae.

“Do you trust me?” He murmurs into Jungkooks hair.

The human shudders and nods into the wolfs neck. “Yes.” Jungkook says softly. He realizes he trusts the other more than anyone. 

“Good, thank you baby. Are there any triggers you would like to talk with me about? I want to be able to help you when those strong emotions come on.” Tae continues, rubbing his hand into Jungkooks back as he speaks, his voice is like a blanket that surrounds the both of them in protection. 

He has to give Tae something to work with, has to. “Um…I uh, I have a hard time with cars hyung.” He says lowly. Then after a beat knowing it won’t be soon that he’ll feel this open about it again. “Food sometimes, and sleep.” 

“Ok.” Tae nods, understanding filling his features. “Ok.” He says again. “That’s why coming here was so hard wasn’t it?” Tae doesn’t wait for a response. “I’ve also noticed you don’t…eat a lot. It worries me and I want to help however I can.” He runs his fingers through Jungkooks hair. “At any point you feel trigged by those or anything at all you can let me know. Please let me know. I’ll be there for you.” 

Jungkook nods, feeling a sad sense of relief and fear mix in his chest. Now that it’s out, the fear of Tae seeing more of him than Jungkook wants to be seen is so much more possible. 

“When you do feel triggered, what do you do?” Taes hand has moved to Jungkooks fists and he rubs a thumb over the humans knuckles. 

The silence is loud and long as Jungkook thinks. 

To what extent is he supposed to share his struggles? He’s opened up now but at what point does it get to be too much? At what point could he be seen as crazy? Or mental? At what point would Tae see him as a basket case needed to be locked away? 

Does he even share to the extent of telling the other about…no, no he can’t. 

“Kookie?” Tae prods when Jungkook doesn’t answer. 

The human sighs, he’s deep enough in this already isn’t he? “I-I either zone out or have a panic attack. Or I try to keep myself present. Most of the time….” I hurt myself. “I try to ground myself.” Jungkook mumbles, hiding his face again, not wanting to look Tae in his eyes and see everything. 

“Ok…” Tae starts, thinking. “What helps you stay grounded?” 

Pain, alcohol and total isolation has been his savior for the most part, at least from having others have to see him in a worse state. Talking to Yug helps. 

“Feeling safe I guess…I don’t really know.” He doesn’t know any healthy ways of coping, at least any he wants Tae to know about. 

“We can work on it together if you’d like. Make a plan for when you feel that way. I can be there for you.” 

“Okay.” Jungkook agrees. 

Jackson and the Im pack have always wanted to help too. He tries not letting his mind wander down that alley of thought. 

“Lets start with just one of those for tonight,” Tae continues. “What helps with sleeping?”

“Well usually it’s hard to fall asleep and then…I get nightmares that wake me up and keep me up.” Those quite honestly are very shitty. 

“Does it help when I’m there?” 

Jungkooks cheeks burn at the implication. He nods instead of speaking. 

“Well there’s a good start.” Tae says and out of the corner of his eye Jungkook can see his smile, something of a proud look. 

“So not being alone okay, that’s something we can work with. What about when you’re by yourself?”

“I um…” He usually talks with Yug. “Take a hot shower or lay there awake. Music sometimes helps and other times I just have to wait until morning comes.”

Tae hmms at that. “That’s…would you feel comfortable calling me on nights like that?” 

“I wouldn’t want to bother you Tae-“ 

“It wouldn’t be a bother. If that helps then I want to be able to offer that for you. But also we should find something that can help especially when you are alone too bun.” 

Jungkook nods, somewhat hesitantly. 

“Please call me during nights like that if I’m not there.”

Jungkooks blush only intensifies at the thought of having more nights with Tae.

“Okay hyung.” 

“Would you like me to send you music you can listen to?”

Jungkook nods tiredly and can feel his heart speed up just slightly at approaching these topics. 

Tae reads him so easily and after a final check in that the human is alright at least for tonight he runs a hand through the youngers hair and tells him he’s proud of him. "Would you feel comfortable to talk more about this tomorrow? We can take it one step at a time together."

Jungkook hesitates, then nods slowly. He already knows that by tomorrow, in the light of a new day he will want nothing more than to close off again. But he can try. 

For the next hour they talk about silly things to lighten the mood, like what they would do if they had the chance to fly to the moon, if they could breath under water where they would swim to first. They talk about what they would be in another life and Taes response of being a farmer makes him grin. Jungkook answers that he would've liked to be a singer. 

But those dreams seem too far away. 

Its when Jungkooks responses become less frequent and less coherent that Tae declares its time they wash up for bed. 

Just as Jungkook is about to slip into sleep he catches one last glimpse of Yug stirring up the itch of not telling Tae everything. His lie to himself that he did what he could almost keeps him up even with Taes warmth next to him. Almost. 

Chapter Text

“You boys ready to go?” Jin calls into the house. 

Jungkook pulls his hoodie on before zipping his bag shut. Popping his knuckles releases a bit of the anxious energy living in his hands, bouncing between the bones. 

“One moment hyung!” Tae answers for the both of them. He comes up behind Jungkook and slowly pulls him into a back hug.

“Are you going to be okay with the drive? Say the word and we can stay here longer until you’re ready.” Tae murmurs and his voice rumbles next to Jungkooks ear soothingly. 

Jungkook sighs and closes his eyes. To be honest he’s not ready. Never is when it comes to driving but he doesn’t feel as close to panic as he was on the way here. Tae being aware of even just a part of his issue with vehicles settles something in his chest that would otherwise be buzzing. 

He nods in lieu of speaking. 

“I gotta have a verbal confirmation of this otherwise I’ll have to keep you here forever.” Tae says and his slender fingers tickle against Jungkooks ribs. 

Jungkook jolts in the others grasp which only encourages Taehyung more. He can’t stop the giggles that escape as he tries to catch his breath and the both of them fall onto the bed in a tangle of limbs. 

Tae finally relents and Jungkook can catch his breath, feeling a slight heat to his cheeks from their short tussle. 

Tae holds himself up above the other and smiles down at Jungkook, gently brushing the humans messy hair from his face. 

“So…what do you say bun? Stay with me forever?” Tae smiles down. His eyes have this glisten to them, shining bright like the stars they saw the other night. Goodness has this weekend gone by far too quickly, but it's brought a peace Jungkook didn’t think possible. 

“Boys! We should really leave now if we want to be back before it gets dark!” That’s Jin again. Their hyung’s voice pops their little bubble and Tae sighs. The wolf drags himself off the bed and pulls Jungkook with him to help him sit up too. 

“So…?” Tae starts. 

“I feel okay for the drive hyung.” Jungkook covers one of his ears to hide the blush, his other hand is still griped in Taes. 

“Only if you’re certain. There’s nothing wrong if you’re not.” Tae brushes at Jungkooks hair again, exposing the humans red ear. 

“I promise…but could you…sit next to me again hyung?” 

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.” 

~~~

The drive itself isn’t bad. It starts off a bit rough, with Jungkook practically holding his breath, but then Tae holds his hand and he can breathe again. The others play calming music and the wolf encourages the human to lay his head on his shoulder. 

Jungkook thankfully is able to sleep though a part of it and for the time that he’s awake the others tell stories to occupy his mind and Jimin keeps his eyes on the road every second of the journey. Jungkooks heart swells with gratitude. 

When they drop him off at his apartment the sun is just starting to kiss the horizon. They send him off with hugs, a lunchbox with dinner and a promise to see each other again soon, or more like as soon as humanly possible, as Hobi puts it. 

Tae walks him to the door and his hug gives the human enough warmth to last the week. 

“I'll call you later okay bun? Get some good sleep before going back to school tomorrow and don’t forget to eat your dinner too.” 

“I will Tae. Thank you…for everything.” Jungkook takes in the calming chamomile smell of the other. 

Tae pulls back to look the human in the eye. “Always Jungkook.” He leans forward slowly and places the softest of kisses on Jungkooks forehead. “And please…call me, if you find yourself struggling. I’m here and will put you first without hesitation.”

Jungkook nods, overwhelmed by the easy declaration, and allows Tae to pull him into one more hug. He remembers the words of the other night, the words ‘because I love you’. 

The humans eyes close and he soaks it all in, even though the concept itself is difficult to understand. 

Saying goodbye to them all is sad, but he’s left with their smiles, warmth and can still feel their arms around him. Even in his empty dull apartment. 

~~~

The moment Jungkooks phone pings and he sees who’s on the caller ID all ease from the previous weekend leaves his body. 

He had just been getting to bed, stomach actually full from the meal he was left, with a remnant of a smile remaining on his face…and then the text came in. 

It’s his mom.

Eomma: Your brothers birthday dinner is this Saturday and I expect you to show up and support him. He’s been doing so well since becoming a doctor and with the wedding coming up we want to show how proud we are of him. Show up no later than 7.

She hasn’t texted him in over two months so to see her name show up out of no where…

He knows without doubt that if he doesn’t respond, she’ll call. If he ignores, she won’t stop. When she wants something its like blinders get put over her eyes and her ear to brain function gets disconnected. 

A twinge of confusion hits at being contacted at all. On one hand he feels as if he should be grateful his mom is even speaking to him, but on the other…he doesn’t want to forget what created that pang in his chest that even just seeing her name on a screen brings. He feels nauseous. 

‘Shit’ Yugyeom says from over his shoulder. 

Shit. 

~~~

“I can tell you’re anxious pup, it’s coming off you in waves.” Tae says over the table. 

Jungkook had to wait until Friday to see Tae again. Work at the cafe kept him busy after school and his job at the bar kept him up late into the night. He almost forgot what it was like having to deal with his schedule and the overwhelmingness of trying to keep up. With school projects on top of it all, extra time he had was spent in the studios painting. What a glorious life.

Through it all he has to admit, knowing that he was going to see Tae was what kept him going. 

Their little vacation feels so far away and is now replaced with excessive energy drinks, coffee, cold nights and an increasing pit in his stomach.

And now the thought of using his free Saturday to go see his family…putting it as mildly and as kindly as he can, he would much rather almost drown in the tub again. 

“My mom texted me.” Jungkook starts. “My brothers birthday is this weekend and everyone is getting together to celebrate him.” He says before taking a sip of his coffee. He glances at the time making a mental reminder of needing to be at the bar in an hour for his shift. 

“You haven’t talked about your family before. Do you…not get along?” Taes sincerity is tangible. 

“Well…” He can’t even force the words out of his mouth to pretend they do. “My parents kicked me out the week of graduation and we were never on the best of terms before that either.” Even thinking back to those days threatens a dark cloud to form above him. “They tend to forget about that though and sometimes try to salvage some sort of relationship…I guess.” More like salvage a support group for his brother, the man who can do no wrong. 

“I’m so sorry to hear that, I can’t imagine what that must feel like.” Tae reaches across their table to grab the humans hand. The wolfs palm in warm in Jungkooks. “Do you want me to come with you?” Taes instant offer throws Jungkook off. 

“What?”

“If you need me there, I’ll be there.” He insists. 

“Hyung I can’t ask you to do that. My family isn’t exactly perfect, they can be a bit…rough to be around. I can’t imagine you’d love to spend your Saturday having dinner with strangers.” Especially not these strangers.

“If you’re there of course I’d want to be there too! And you’re not a stranger bun.” Tae smiles, having no clue what he could be signing himself up for. 

“They just aren’t always the nicest Tae. They really don’t like wolves either.” Jungkook says, ashamed. 

The moment his parents found out Jungkook was getting close to the Im pack they did nothing to hide their distain. They’ve always been prejudiced against wolves and he still can’t figure out why. 

“That doesn’t matter. If you need me there, I’ll be there. There’s no reason that you should have to do something hard alone.” 

Taes so earnest with every word. So confident. How on earth can Jungkook say no? 

~~~

The closer they get to Jungkooks childhood home the more his heart speeds up. His hand in Taes grip starts to shake and the wolf squeezes it back in comfort. There are a few cars parked outside the home and Jungkook immediately recognizes his brothers car. Pristine and freshly washed. 

Jungkook closes his eyes and swallows thickly against the bout of nausea that hits. It’s his family, he should be fine. It’s just dinner, he’s going to be fine. Tae parks the car on the side of the street. 

“Jungkook? You okay?” The concerned warm brown eyes look into the humans and he can’t help but melt into Taehyungs touch.

“Yeah, sorry, I just…need a minute.” Jungkook looks to the front door, dreading the moment it opens. 

‘Give me a minute with your brother and I can beat the everliving sh-‘ Yug starts from the back with dripping malice only to be interrupted by Taes sweet like honey care. 

“You know you don’t have to do this. It is completely your choice. I know they’re your family but your mental health matters more.” Tae brushes aside the youngers bangs. 

“Thank you, I’ll be okay.” He gives the other a smile. “Thank you for coming with me Tae. I just,” he takes a deep breath. “I need to warn you again about my family.” He drops his attention to their fingers intertwined. “They can be really offensive and vocal with their opinions. My family just thinks a bit more…close minded and-and…”

“Hey,” Tae brings Jungkooks gaze up to meet his, stopping the younger in his rambling. “take a breath, there’s no rush.”

“They don’t approve of a lot of what I do, or who I am…” 

Taehyungs heart breaks at the look on the humans face. To have your own family reject you but still expect things from you. He can’t imagine. 

“I’m so sorry Jungkook.” 

“It’s okay, well it’s not but….I’m okay. I do have to go in, it’ll be worse if I don’t.” He’d most definitely get a million calls and texts from his mom, and even from his dad too which truly means he’s in trouble. The disappointment would reach him across the city.

“We can leave the moment you’re ready okay baby?” Tae says softly and the human smiles at the nickname. 

“Well, let’s get this over with.” Jungkook says, turning shy.

Taehyung smiles at the cuteness and kisses the other on the forehead. “Lets do this.” 

The two hold hands until they reach the door and Jungkook releases the hold to ring the doorbell. It takes just a few minutes until his older brother answers and a smile breaks out on his face. 

It’s been since Christmas that the two brothers have seen each other, since Jungkook has seen any of his family, and Dae looks just the same. He’s taller than Jungkook and in comparison has a bit more muscle to his bones, especially considering the amount of weight Jungkook has lost within the past two years. Dae’s hair is shorter and styled more business like…basically the man is a polar opposite of his tattoo and pierced, long haired and baggy clothes wearing brother. Jungkook is simply a small shadow next to him. 

His parents will never cease praising their first born and the doctor he’s becoming. The fact that he’s engaged to a wealthy young woman is the icing on the cake. No wonder his parents are so disappointed in their art major introvert son. 

“Ah Jungkook! Didn’t think you’d actually show up!” Dae says and Jungkook knows it’s supposed to be a lighthearted welcome but it’s hard not to take it more like a stab. 

Like Jungkook had a choice, either come and suffer though a few hours of family torture or deal with months of backlash from his parents. 

“Come on and smile Kook! Damn you’re always so gloomy, this is a celebration!” His tone is light but the words weigh heavy. The arm smacking down on his shoulder is very unwelcome as well. 

Taehyung stiffens next to him and Jungkook chooses to ignore the comment and forces a smile instead. 

‘Holy shit did I forget how much I hate him.’ Yug says and looks about two seconds away from punching Dae’s head right off his neck. 

“Happy birthday D-“ Jungkook starts. 

“Who’s this?” Dae interrupts, looking at Taehyung with obvious discomfort. 

“Taehyung, I’m Jungkooks friend.” Taehyung holds out his hand and even Jungkook can tell the smile is slightly forced.

“You’re not one of those wolves are you? That one pack Jungkook likes to run around with?” Dae says, ignoring the outstretched hand and Jungkook wants to smack the other for the blatant disrespect. His parents opinions have rubbed off on Dae far too much. 

“Uh…I’m…” Taehyung looks to Jungkook as if unsure how to respond, cautious of how the birthday boy will take it. 

His mom and dad have always said that Jungkook will become an animal himself by being around wolves. They never liked the Im pack and even when everything went wrong, they showed little care for Yugyeom. Jungkook tries to understand that his family is simply uneducated but the sting of them being so vocal on the matter and stubborn makes it in simplest terms, difficult for the human.

Those wolves have been more of a family than his own sadly ever will be. 

“He is a wolf.” Jungkook answers for him proudly, grabbing Taes hand and walking past his brother further into the house. Not even two minutes in and he’s already wanting to get as far away from this place as possible. 

Once out of the entry way and in the living room Jungkook truly wants to run. His dad sits on the couch and seems to be in the middle of a heated discussion with his uncle. Aggression lines his fathers shoulders and Jungkook almost forgot how intense his dad can be, even on the lightest of topics. Two unfamiliar guys are at the table and must be some of Daes friends and the woman in the kitchen chatting with his mom and aunt must be the new fiancé. 

“Ah there you are Jungkook! You’re late, come help in the kitchen.” His mom calls out as a greeting. 

“Hey Kooks friend, why don’t you sit down and tell me about yourself?” Dae pats an arm harshly on Taes back before the two of them can escape to the kitchen. Dae sits, joining the others at the table and pulls out a fourth chair, beckoning Tae to follow. While the invite in any other setting would be kind, now only seems slightly menacing. 

Tae quickly rubs at Jungkooks back with a smile before taking a seat somehow looking completely at ease. 

“Grab the plates from the cupboard why don’t you? We’re already running behind and the table isn’t even set.” Jungkooks mom says once he’s in the kitchen. “Wish your father would help but of course work talk takes over everything…” She mumbles under her breath and his aunt goes off into a rant of her latest divorce and how it was the best thing she’s ever done. 

The familiar uncomfortable weight settles around Jungkooks lungs and he’s 13 again wondering how much longer his parents will tolerate staying together. 

He sets the table without complaint. 

“So Jungkook, what are you up to these days? You completely missed your brothers engagement.” His aunt perches against the counter next to the bubbling stew. 

He holds back his tongue from saying he wasn’t invited. The real question is why is he now?

“I’m in school right now.” Jungkook says, setting down the last bowl. “And I’m working at a cafe too.” The bar job would not go over well here so he most definitely will keep his lips sealed on that. 

“What’s your major?”

“Art.” And he already expects what she says next. 

“You know artists really don’t make that much money, almost nothing at all actually. Do you honestly plan to do anything with that?” She plops a bite of kimchi in her mouth. 

“I’ve told him that countless times but does he want to be smart and listen to his mom? No he doesn’t.” Jungkooks mom brings a steaming dish of noodles to the table and gives him a look, making eye contact for the first time since he’s walked in. “You really should be serious about your future Jungkook. I mean look at Dae,” Jungkooks surprised it’s taken her this long to bring his brother up. "he’s successful, found a wife, making money…” Jungkooks heartbeat picks up with each word, even more so at the look on her faces as her eyes rake over his appearance. “you should ask him about some advice about what to do. I mean with your schooling and grades obviously you won’t be able to be a doctor like him but you need to make some changes because if you keep going forward the way you are you’ll be alone, unhappy and unsuccessful for the rest of your-“

“It’s nice to see the place that Jungkook grew up, I’m his friend Tae.” Taes voice interjects and a warm hand settles on Jungkooks lower back. The human can physically feel his heart settle just at the others presence. 

He can tell his mom is upset at the interruption but she covers it up quickly. 

“I didn’t know that Jungkook was bringing anyone.” She forces her sweet smile even more. 

“Thank you for your hospitality. Can I help bring anything to the table?” Tae being so at ease reminds Jungkook to take a breath.

“How kind, Jungkook is already helping with that.” She waves him down. “Please, you’re the guest, take a seat.” She motions back to the table when Jungkook notices Daes fiancé escaped to. She sits next to his brother and Jungkook can see the sparkle of her engagement ring even from the next room. 

Tae leans forward, taking one of the readied dishes. “Its alright, I insist.” He says with a charming smile and Jungkook can’t help his own smirk. 

Before long the table is set and everyone is gathered together to sit. 

“Before we start I just want to say how proud I am of my sweet boy.” Jungkooks mom stands, beaming at the opportunity to praise her golden child. “He has worked so hard to get where he is today and with how incredible his life is turning out just proves how much he deserves it.” She grabs onto Daes hand, squeezing it tight. “And we are so happy he found the perfect partner to be the newest addition to our family. Happy birthday Dae.” She raises a glass and even Jungkooks dad gives Dae a proud nod, which coming from him is saying a lot. 

“Ah, I wouldn’t be where I am without you guys.” Dae smiles, then looks directly at Jungkook with a smirk. 

Dinner starts without any hitches and Jungkook is able to stomach a few bites as the family chatter covers the room like a blanket. His dad goes back to whatever conversation he was deep into and then of course his aunt starts shamelessly flirting with Daes friends. His mom starts chatting wedding details with the fiancé. Jungkook really should learn her name, the name of his soon to be sister in law. 

Jungkook’s beginning to think that he was being dramatic about how bad tonight could be…until Dae singles Tae out. 

“So Tae was it?” Just with his tone Jungkook knows the other is up to something. He says it quietly enough it gets lost with how involved everyone else is in their own conversations. “You gonna help Jungkook here finally find a girlfriend?” 

Jungkook immediately feels like bolting. He knew he never should have opened up to Dae all those years ago. He used to be able to trust him but then…they just became so different. Different enough that Dae feels like he has to target his younger brother at least. 

Jungkook can tell the question takes Tae by surprise. He swallows then sets his chopsticks down. “Jungkook is more than capable of finding whatever it is he wants to look for.” Tae responds calmly and in such a way that he’s never spoken towards Jungkook. 

If Jungkook didn’t feel a type of way towards Tae before he definitely would now. 

“Ah…don’t tell me,” Dae looks back and forth between the two of them. “The two of you are doing it aren’t you? I thought you grew out of that gay shit years ago.” Dae scrunches up his face in disgust.

All the food in Jungkooks stomach turns to cement and he’s filled with the unbearable urge to purge and get rid of it. He quickly looks to his parents and feels just a fraction of relief at neither of them having heard. They don't know. 

“Dae, don’t do this here.” Jungkook tries quietly. 

“No really though, I told you then how disgusting you were, no wonder you’ve had to resort to wolves to get any action, no one else wants you.” Dae runs a hand through his hair and his engagement ring reflects the dining room light.

Tae stiffens and takes a deep breath before speaking. “I understand it’s your special day, but that’s no excuse to be an absolute dick.” Tae says with a growl and Jungkook can see just a glimmer of red in his eyes. 

“Or what wolf boy? You gonna chew up my shoes?” Dae scoffs and leans back in his seat, resting his arm behind his fiancé. “You’re probably a sicko and would love a good dicking dow-“

Jungkook stands abruptly, and his chair scrapes against the floor, not caring about the table full of eyes lasered in on him. 

“Shut up Dae. Just, shut up.” The nausea rises in Jungkooks stomach and its all he can do to make a beeline for the bathroom. 

His mom calls out after him but he couldn’t care less. 

It takes too many breaths to calm himself down and force the bile back down from creeping up his throat. And his mom wonders why Dae and him never see each other. 

‘What an absolute shitty person.’ Yug says from where he’s leaned against the door. ‘Prick is so insensitive, it’s all such bullshit.’ 

Jungkook closes his eyes and takes another breath. Yug never liked Dae. Even from the first time they met Yug could read him like a book and if he could he would give him a -1 star. 

‘And watch you’ll go back out there and your parents will chew you out for ‘disturbing the peace’ or whatever and he won’t get a sideways glance for instigating the whole thing.’ 

Jungkook looks at his friend and can’t help but chuckle at the absolute rage rolling off him in waves. When Yug gets mad his face scrunches up, it's honestly endearing. 

Yug looks up only to pause from his seething to lift a brow at Jungkooks sudden change of emotion. 

“I just, it makes me laugh how much you hate his guts.” Jungkook shakes his head, both in gratitude of the other always staying by his side and in how ridiculous the whole day has been. "That you've actually seen what a jerk he can be."

Yug chuckles but its clear the sound is still fueled by his annoyance. ‘Well it seems I’m not the only one, I thought Taehyung was about to lunge across the whole table to get Dae to shut up. But then you had that covered.’ His smile shows just how proud he is. 

“Yeah…” Jungkook just keeps getting reminded how lucky he is for Yug, for Tae, for all the friends he’s made. He then drops his head into his hands, pulling at his hair. “Gosh I can’t believe I did that. My moms gonna kill me I know it. Shit, I should’ve just stayed silent.”

‘Hell no, Dae deserved to be told to shut up, deserves a lot more than that if you ask me…’ Yug shakes his head, probably imagining how he could give Dae just what he deserves. 

“Yeah but, it’s only ever going to make things worse for me.” Jungooks own words sound so…defeated. 

There’s a knock at the bathroom door and its only when the soft “Jungkook?” comes from the other side that his second long anxiety calms. 

Jungkook quickly opens the door to Tae on the other side. 

"He was so out of line, and I was too, I shouldn't have-" Tae starts, anxiety obviously rippling beneath his skin too. 

"Thank you. Thank you for standing up for me. I'm so sorry for what he said." Jungkook says, and truly means it. 

"There's no need, and of course. I'll always stand with you." Tae smiles, it's the sweetest thing in this whole house. "Man, you sure it would've been worse if we didn't come at all?" He continues with a chuckle to which jungkook can't help but join in with his own.

"We should get back. But I don't know how much longer I can stay." Jungkook looks over to the direction of the dining room, grateful its not quite in sight.

"Are you sure you wouldn't want to leave now? I'll support you no matter what you choose."  

"I'm sure." He is so far from sure. 

When they return to the table Jungkook only hopes his cheeks aren't blazing red. Before he even has a chance to sit back down his mom calls out to him. 

“Jungkook come help me with the dishes and the cake.” The way his mom says it leaves absolutely no space to argue. He can’t say he’s upset his dinner is over as a whole. He motions to Tae that he can sit back down and keep eating, and only after a little extra persistence does Tae actually do so. The others eat on, sparing Jungkook and Tae both glances that are painfully readable. 

Jungkook gathers a few finished plates and dishes from the others and prepares himself for whatever is about to happen. He has a feeling his mom has more on her mind than just cleaning the kitchen. 

Part of him is grateful the kitchen is out of view and earshot from the dining table, but the other part is nervous to be so isolated with the woman.

‘Jungkook, whatever she says, know it’s not truth.’ Yugyeom says, already prepared. ‘You are not whatever she may say you are.’ 

It’s when he brings the last finished dish to the sink that she speaks up. 

“How you acted at the table was entire uncalled for and disrespectful not only to your brother but your father and I too.” She says, not even sparing him a glance. She doesn't even know what happened and yet Jungkook is the one getting a scolding. “You know your attitude for a while has been unacceptable. I’d appreciate it if you actually tried Jungkook."

Yugyeom rolls his eyes from the corner and makes a strangling motion with his hands. 

“Mom I didn’t…Dae was-” Jungkook hates how he can’t help but stutter over his words. 

“I get it, you lost a friend but the rest of us are going through things too. And it’s not like it happened last week but over a year ago. You should be moved on by now.” 

Jungkook recoils from the words, physically taking a step back from the attack. It stings. He’s just grateful the others cant hear her. Grateful Tae cant hear her. 

“Mom I-“

“Your brother has a lot going on and he really could use more of your support, not your disrespect. Especially with his work and the wedding coming up. But you always start things with him and you lock yourself away ignoring your family, we never hear from you.” She finally looks at him, an expression of apprehension coating her features. “It's so hard to even get you to try to be a part of this family. Was I such a bad mom to you growing up that you turned out this way?”

You kicked me out. He wants to say. 

“Mom, I’m working two jobs and going to school. I’m trying.” Jungkook hates how small his voice sounds. 

“Not hard enough, obviously. Don’t you think you’ve given yourself enough time to be depressed Jungkook?” He hates the way his name sounds in her mouth. “Seriously, can’t you suck it up for once and stop sucking the life out of the room all the time?” 

Jungkooks breath comes too quickly and his eyes sting at the tears beginning to form there. 

“I’m trying, it’s been really hard mom…I…” I want to die. 

The first tear falls from Jungkooks eyes. 

“And what about me huh?” She turns completely, dishes now forgotten. “What I have to go through because of you? How disappointing it is to have my own son shame his family? What about your brother?” She steps forward and is so much larger than him. “It’s not always about you Jungkook. Stop being so selfish.”

The floor beneath him threatens to crumble. There’s no stability here, no air. She thinks he wants to be like this? Selfish. His own mom…how can she…

“That’s enough.” A powerful voice says behind him and the darkness and disappearing ground become something more stable at the hand that lands on Jungkooks shoulder. Tae. Saving him again. “What makes you think you can speak to him like that.” Unlike Jungkooks, there is no waiver to Taehyungs words, his words which aren’t a question but an accusation. 

“And who do you think you are to talk to me like that?” His mom says, folding her arms and staring daggers into Taehyung. “This is my home and he’s my son.”

“He is his own person and you’re disrespecting him.” Taes grip on Jungkook tightening betrays his calm demeanor. 

“And to think, I allowed an animal like you into my home.” She scoffs. “You’re no longer welcome here and Jungkook, I refuse to allow you to see him anymore. You stick around his kind and you’ll only become an animal yourself, cant you see they've all corrupted you?” 

He can’t believe the words coming out of her mouth and the ones that come out of his. “Stop.” The power behind the one word shocks the three of them. “Taehyung is more of a human than you. He cares about me mom. You don’t see me. You’ve never seen me!” The shock on her face would almost, in any other setting, be comical. “I can’t be here any more and I can’t be a part of this family, not like this.” His words go a bit more quiet at the end but he holds onto his courage nonetheless.

“And to think all that we’ve done for you. Your brother would never be so disrespectful.” She spits and throws the dish towel down. Here he is, standing in front of her, crying, and she still is talking about his brother. “Fine then Jungkook, leave and don’t come back. I don’t want you in my home anyways.” 

These last words are the final hit in the peg. She’s kicking him out. Again.

Taehyung looks close to bearing his teeth and he pulls Jungkook back, protecting him from the woman. 

Jungkook takes a breath and looks at her, really looks at her. “I wish things could be different.” He wishes he were different, that she was. He wishes that they could have a relationship that went outside of her being disappointed.

She stands her ground in her anger. Jungkook allows Taehyung to pull him back further.

“Go get your shoes on Jungkook, we’re leaving.” Tae motions Jungkook to the door but stays back. The human is grateful for the chance to escape and is shocked at the last words Taehyung says to his mom. 

“You have no idea how special he is don’t you?” 

They’re almost out the door when a deeper voice stops them. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” His dad stands behind them, towering and threatening them to challenge him. Its the first words the man has said to him all evening. 

“We’re leaving.” Tae answers for the human who’s shaking hands fumble with his shoes. 

His dad looks between the two boys, folds his arms and then the next words surprise Jungkook most of all. 

“I'd like to talk to you Jungkook, just you, another time. When I call, answer alright?” Then his dad steps aside, surprising them both. 

“O-okay.” Jungkook mummers, then takes the opportunity of escape. 

It isn’t until they’re in the car that Jungkook is able to breathe properly again. 

“Jungkook? Are you okay?” Tae asks but the way he says it is like he already knows the answer. 

The fear and sadness that hit from hearing his moms words get twisted into something so much harder to keep a hold of. It’s raw anger, raw hurt. None of it is fair. 

“I should’ve known this would’ve happened. No matter what she will never see me, never care about, never love me. It’s always been my brother before me, I’m broken and a waste of space and they will never see me more than just a shadow of Dae.” He lets out a sob. “I didn’t realize just how much I want her to love me, to see me.” 

He gasps for a breath. 

“She’s probably going to do it all again. Kick me out, not talk to me for months and then call me back for the wedding as if nothing happened. I’ll never truly be free of her, of any of them. I can’t keep doing this again and again, the first time hurt so bad and this?” He finally looks at the wolf feeling his eyes widen in fear. "I can’t do it Tae.”

Tae pulls him into a hug, holding him tight. 

“Hey, shh shh, I got you. You don’t have to worry about all that. You don’t have to be anything for them. You don’t have to be anything but yourself.” Taes hand holds the back of Jungkooks head protectively. “I got you.” 

Jungkook soaks in the words, words he wish he could hear from his own mom but knows he never will. 

Chapter Text

When Jungkook comes to awareness it’s to blood dripping down his arm. 

Fresh stinging cuts line the inside of his forearm and by the way his leg feels, on the side of his thigh too. Looking down only proves it with the blood now dripping on the floor. 

Cotton fills his head and coats his mouth which tells him a nightmare is what most likely brought him to this point. This isn’t the first time this has happened. Trapped in a dream his body will move on it's own to release the ache hiding underneath his skin, just below the surface. The cuts won’t stop until his brain can finally catch on that he’s mixing dreams with reality, or a screwed reality. 

It’s an itch that only the pain can subside. 

He wonders if the action itself or the fact that he feels better after is more messed up. 

'You did it again.' Yug says. 

The bathroom floor is cold where Jungkook sits and briefly he wonders if Yug can feel the chill too. 

He pulls his sleeves down, ignoring the sting from the fresh wounds he unintentionally caused himself. He’ll clean them later, tiredness is pulling at him too harshly to care right now. 

“It’s fine.” 

‘You know it’s not.’ Yug watches him with eyes that see too much as the human struggles to stand. 

Jungkook ignores the other and the dizziness that hits like a sledgehammer and focuses every working limb and braincell to simply make it to the hopeful warmth of his beat up couch, not the bed. The cushions are more comfortable than the floor and the blanket he pulls around himself seems promising enough…but the warmth never comes. 

He finally falls into an uneasy rest by the time the sun is rising but the tiredness he feels is the kind that can’t be fixed with sleep. 

~~~

Jungkook was able to nap maybe three hours. It’s a lot longer than he expected so he’s surprisingly content. He’s just grateful he didn’t sleep through his alarm to leave even though he still is running late to meet his hyungs. 

It however gave him enough time to clumsily clean himself up and bandage his arms and leg. He’s grateful some conscious part of his mind had the decency to make the cuts closer to his elbow than his wrist. Those are easier to hide. 

The Kim pack had set up a coffee date at the bakery close to Jungkooks campus and he’s honestly looking forward to some hot chocolate and the company of the pack. The place being quaint, warm and not too busy is a plus. 

Jungkook quickens his pace, wishing the bus stop was closer to where the cafe is. He’s pulling out his phone to send Tae a text letting him know he’s almost there when- 

“I was hoping to see you again.” The voice is familiar and runs an uncomfortable chill down Jungkooks spine. Turning unfortunately reveals the voice to belong to exactly who he thought it was. The man from the bar stands before him with a creepy smirk on his face as he looks the human up and down. 

Everything the others said and how they reacted to the man only fuels Jungkooks anxiety at seeing him again in person. Not to mention the man doesn’t seem to understand the concept of personal space. 

“My hyungs are waiting for me.” Jungkook says with as much courage and conviction possible, and continues on his way. 

'Jungkook you gotta get away from him.' Yug says with as much urgency as Jungkook feels. 

“Ah yes, your hyungs.” The man walks alongside Jungkook. “When I heard the Kim’s had a new plaything I was intrigued, and after we met…I just had to come see you again.” The nearness is worrying. 

Jungkooks less than a block away from the others and they can-

“Hold on there doll.” A hand grabs at Jungkooks arm in an aggressive hold. The guy has a lot of strength and Jungkook wishes Tae were here. The human tries ripping his arm from the stranger but his hold is strong enough it starts to hurt. 

“Let me go.” He tries putting as much power into his words, allowing his anger to override his anxiety. If this man is someone that even the others are nervous about, Jungkook wants to be as far as possible from him. 

“Why would I do that? I haven’t got to play with you yet and your blood smells…quite sweet.” The mans smile is far too creepy. “And fresh.”

“I said let me the hell go.” Jungkook puts as much venom as he can into his shaking voice and tries to yank his arm back, too freaked out by what the man means by that. 

“Oh but…” the stranger pulls the human closer to him so they’re face to face. “I thought you said you wanted to go home with me?” The mans eye glow, it’s a red alluring color that makes the tension though Jungkooks body ease out. The hold on his arm becomes more tender and the distance between the two of them is much more comfortable. Jungkooks not sure why he wanted to get away in the first place. 

Part of Jungkook says that he should still try to get back to his hyungs but the other part leans in closer to hear the man’s next words. 

“You’re safe with me doll. Remember? You came here to meet with me and it’s time to go home.” A gentle hand travels from cupping his cheek to petting at his neck. 

Jungkook nods because of course it makes sense. 

‘Jungkook what are you doing?’ Yugyeoms voice floats by but Jungkook easily ignores it. 

He allows the man to guide him down the walkway, even as his feet clumsily follow, and sees an open car waiting for them with another person siting inside. Jungkook thinks he should be feeling something, anything besides the ease and comfort but he just doesn’t. Every worry washes away and-

“GET THE HELL AWAY FROM HIM!” A voice booms out, growling, shattering the bubble of warmth and Jungkook realizes he’s a step away from getting into the car. 

That voice…it’s Namjoon. But he sounds different…scary. 

The man next to him swears and the color of his eyes shifts into something much more terrifying, warping the humans world into terror instead of whatever comfort it just was. 

Jungkook gets thrown down against the vehicle onto the curb and every anxiety hits him at once. Every fear and terror runs through his veins and leaves him a shaking mess. 

There’s chaos going on above him, around him, everywhere. It’s overwhelming and his lungs refuse to cooperate. There’s no air. 

A mess of blonde hair obscures his vision but the words the person says are muddled and don’t reach him though this nightmare. 

He tries shoving off the hands on his shoulders and at his face. He kicks out wanting to get away from it all. The hands stubbornly grab at his face again and Jungkook screams at the contact, clenching his eyes shut and clawing at the attacker. His skin burns where he’s touched. 

“Look at me!” The words feel like an unbreakable command and Jungkooks met with another set of glowing eyes. These aren’t red like the ones before but gold, and loving. “Jungkook baby you’re okay, just breathe.” The humans lungs miraculously work again. “Let’s get you out of here huh?” The commotion around them is still going on but a little further away. It doesn’t matter with the calm wave that overtakes his mind and body. 

A hand pulls his attention away from it all to look back at those golden eyes. “Don’t worry about anything but looking at me baby. Don’t you want to follow me?” It’s a question but Jungkook knows the answer is obvious. He does want to follow him. 

The human is led away and with every step he takes it’s like walking on clouds. His head lulls as if filled up like a ballon. His body is so far away he’s sure he would fly away if the hand holding his let go. 

The rest is fuzzy but Jungkook is in a different car, it’s warm and others are there. They ask him questions and he nods because he thinks the one with golden eyes would want him to and when he tells the human that he should rest his tired eyes Jungkook has nothing in himself to disagree. 

~~~

It’s disorienting waking up. Jungkook doest know how he got here and knowing he should be at the cafe meeting his hyungs only spurs on a million questions. 

“You awake baby?” Tae is next to him, brows furrowed and voice just above a whisper. 

“Tae?” Jungkook mumbles. Did he drink too much last night? He wouldn’t do that with his hyungs around and he also doesn’t have any overwhelming nausea or headache…

The bed is warm and the humans head is fuzzy, almost cocooned…while it was at first comforting is only now…unsettling. 

“Is he awake?” Someone whispers, coming into the room. Jungkook squints up to see Jimin and Jin joining them. Joining all of them apparently as the rest of the pack is seated around the room. They look anxious. 

Jungkooks heart picks up, spurred on by the tension in the air and whatever ease he was in dissipates immediately. 

He sits up, allowing Tae to help him lean against the headboard. 

Yugyeom sits at the far end of the bed, eyes worried and scared and his body rigid with it.

“How are you feeling Jungkook?” Jin asks, setting a glass of water beside the bed for the human. “Any nausea at all? Dizziness?”

“What…what happened to me?” Jungkook whispers, ignoring the questions, holding his arms tight against his torso. 

Tae stiffens next to him and both Namjoon and Jin look to Jimin. Jungkook allows his own gaze to land on his hyung and his eyes widen at the redness and puffiness around Jimins eyes. 

“I’m so sorry baby, I had to. You weren’t…breathing. You were dropping hard from what he did to you.” Jimin whispers back, wringing his hands together. 

It comes back to Jungkook all at once. 

That man was talking to him and…

“Did he drug me?” Jungkook looks up at the others, knowing his eyes are red and give away how scared he feels by the way they all look back at him in sympathy. 

Tae rubs a comforting hand against Jungkooks, preparing him for the rest of this conversation. Jin leans forward this time and smiles gently. 

“His name is Jiseong. He’s clung onto your scent.”

“So he’s an alpha? Then why did-“ 

“Let hyung explain baby.” Jin continues, sitting on the side of the bed and gently and rubs a hand onto the youngers knee. “He’s not an alpha but a vampire.” 

Jungkook looks at all the others to see their grim expressions. They’re serious. He’s heard of vampires existing but that was only in stories and folktales. Unlike wolves they were never accepted until they just kind of disappeared. Or apparently they go to freaking bars and try to kidnap college students off the streets. 

“I know it’s hard to wrap your head around but vampires have unique abilities and one of his is being a charm speaker. With just a few words he can have any man or beast doing his will without a seconds hesitation. He's really dangerous.” 

Jungkook thinks back to how quickly he went to trusting the man. Nausea rises at the thought. He looks at the eldest to continue. 

“When we found the two of you he almost had you in his car. You really seem to be susceptible to these types of powers. He was still charming you when we attacked so we think his adrenaline reached through the link, that or he released you without bringing you back slowly. Either one of those would bring you into a charm drop which ripped away all sense of comfort and calmness. That combined with your anxiety rippling, threw you deep into a panic attack.” Jin says, sadness flooding his eyes. 

A car. He was about to get into a freaking car with the man. 

Jungkook remembers the feeling of never ending doom that enveloped him. He loosens his grip on himself and leans more into Taes arms. 

“While most of us were fighting off Jiseong…” Jin then looks to Jimin as if asking him to continue for him. 

The other sighs and leans forward, getting closer to Jungkook but far enough to allow the human his space. 

“Jungkook baby I’m so sorry, I had to charm you to get you out of the drop. It was far too dangerous for your health to try anything else. And you weren’t…responding.” Jimin sounds heartbroken in his words, the last few cracking with his calm facade. 

Jungkook stills. The gold eyes. He now can connect them with Jimins tuff of hair and touch and… 

“You’re a…”

“I’m a vampire, baby.” Jimin says carefully. The room is silent aside from their breathing and Jungkooks heavy confusion. 

“But that’s…” 

“He’s not the only one Kook.” Yoongi speaks up for the first time tonight. He looks to the eldest before continuing. “So am I and Jin hyung. The three of us.” 

Jungkook stares at them for probably too long.

“You don’t have to believe it right now sweetheart.” Jimin reaches forward carefully to hold onto the humans hand. 

Jungkook takes his hand away and runs it through his hair trying to come to grips with everything. “I don’t understand.” His chest constricts.

“That’s perfectly okay baby.” 

“I don’t…don’t…”

“Sweetheart, take a breath.” 

“Please, please don’t do that again…” he stutters out. His head feels far too fuzzy to be processing any of this right now but he knows he never wants to feel that again. Whatever it was. 

“Baby-“ 

“Please. I don’t want to feel like that. Please never again.” Jungkook begs. He keeps his eyes down, not wanting to see the hurt look on the others face. 

“I promise Jungkook.” 

Jungkook nods, keeping his breathing under control. 

After a beat Jin speaks up. 

“You can ask us all the questions you want sweetheart but first we need to get some food in you. Your blood sugar levels are far too low for my liking right now.” Jin says, placing a gentle hand onto Jungkook’s shoulder to which the human flinches. He doesn’t mean to and the look on his hyungs face is heartbreaking. He takes a breath and it’s a signal for the rest of them to take a step back and give him a little more space. 

“I think I need air or…or something. I can’t…” He takes another breath but the air isn’t reaching his lungs properly. 

“Hyungs can I have the room with Kookie please?” Tae says softly, eyes not leaving the human. 

They all hesitantly agree and Jungkook can feel multiple concerned gazes on him before they leave the room. 

Alone with just Tae, Jungkook slumps into himself. “Hyung.” He all but sobs out and reaches for the wolf. Taehyung pulls him into a warm embrace and while Jungkook almost flinches again he reminds himself that he’s safe with Tae. Will always be safe with Tae. 

“A lot has happened huh?” Tae whispers into the humans hair. 

“I’m sorry.” Jungkook says back into the wolfs collarbone. 

“Why are you sorry bun?” 

“I feel like it was my fault it all happened…” Jungkook whispers. 

Tae pulls out just enough to look him in the eye but still be in each other arms. “I want you to listen to me Kook. It’s not your fault. It was not your fault.” 

Jungkook blinks against the sudden tears springing to his eyes and buries his face into the others chest. 

“I hated that feeling.” The human admits and the first tears fall. 

“I know baby. I’m going to do everything I can to make sure you never feel that again.” 

“I hated it so much.” Jungkook knows there’s so much to talk about, so much he has to face. Almost being taken like that. If his hyungs hadn’t...he doesn’t want to think what would’ve happened. And damn vampires for crying out loud. Not to mention Jiseong is still out there. He wants to accept the embrace around him, only care about being in the bubble of comfort right now...but Jiseong is still out there. That vampire is still out there. if he was able to find Jungkook once, who's to stop him from finding the human again?