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toon patrol’s real world

Summary:

real world and toon town were on the same block, you could walk your dog down normal streets and then walk into a place wanting make a joke out of you if the stop didn’t stop everyone, and yet toons stayed so far away from the real world and all its problems, when psycho meets someone who works for the real world trying to hide people hurt by the world war, the whole toon patrol’s might have new jobs, (i shouldn’t have put this in a series but i did, sorry)

Notes:

i am surprised that there isn’t any more fanfictions about psycho and the other weasels of the toon portal. they were short lived yeah but they were some of my favorite villains in all of disney and i’ll like to see more. i have been working on this for a few months and i really hope you guys love it!! comments and kudos are always appreciated

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: off to work

Chapter Text

smarty pulled psycho in his office before he ran off outside, psycho didn’t stop him since smarty's office was something psycho never saw in toon town, it wasn’t all the colors the rest of the town made it a rule it had to be, instead it was the same color as the both of them just like how the humans like the judge

smarty said if he had it any other way he’ll start going around acting like psycho did the gears in his head falling out after getting busted but psycho liked that idea, smarty was always a really worried bossy boss

“psycho” he told him being the only toon use to looking him in his funhouse nut house eyes, “don’t go ‘round jumping every where, dat judge's ‘bout ta lose it cause of ya” he told pointing at his chest so he’ll keep in his head

psycho giggled smile big just like that morning hours before they even woke up, smarty still got the shakes when he saw him sleeping with it on his face, “ok smarty!” psycho told him like it was a secret

he started shaking in place waiting for smarty’s ok like he was a dog like wheezy liked joking that ended with crack over his head, smarty sighed “go ahead” he said

wheezy choked on and dropped his smoke from psycho appearing next to him with a loud giggle, “damn! a wasted smoke” he said if it was stupid instead of psycho he had his knuckles broken by now

they both stayed outside wheezy eyeing the buildings built like a coloring’s books, their's stood like a sore since they had some humans come by and fix it for em, wheezy wished his smoke could burn them all down, save them all a lot of trouble

but maybe psycho's poison could do a better job, psycho’s kinds pressure of the world wasn’t drinking and he’s still been waiting to him give a smoke a try and lady's weren’t even a thing to him, but fireworks

psycho threw the fire pop to the ground watching the fuzz reach its end before it blew up! “hahaha!” he giggled at the sound just then smarty came up like the sound surrounded him like s spite and threw a slap to the back of his head stopping him with a snarl at him ready to grab a chair to stop him

“what i say every day psycho!” he yelled at him
while psycho shook his head “one a these ya gonna die laughin’” he told him

“smarty doesn’t have to psycho! psycho done laughing!” psycho told smarty who’s never gonna try to get to talk normal since normal wasn’t why he was made

“sure and i’m turning my suit purple” smarty murdered walking to what greasy called smarty’s gal, the station wagon seemed like it was brand new and had the day’s light or moon's light shining off it every time he took it out

it roared like a beast when smarty started the engine psycho shaking at the sound, smarty’s car rides were the very best car rides. red lights weren’t a thing when he was behind the road and everything was always a race so they went zooming through the streets whenever they left to work

wheezy lit another couple smokes up, and psycho took obvious when he blew out a skull to liven things up a bit while they waited for greasy to get stupid out the door

“ohh how wheezy do that?” psycho asked his curiosity through the roof, “wheezy do again” he asked him

“heh” wheezy said simply before puffing out an arrow that flew over into a tree and a toon bird came flying out landing in front of them

he growled at them like he wasn’t just 5 inches away from the ground, wheezy showed the tough guy his teeth with his eye burning eyes he could use as a lighter, and there went all his color

he ran off after screaming “good riddance” wheezy said toughly throwing a empty smoke out of his mouth where it stood and leaning back

“psycho wanna try!” psycho said rushing and picking his old cigarette but off the floor

as funny as dying would be right now wheezy still stopped “psycho” he wheezed out grabbing his shoulder, and for the first time in his life took a cigarette out for someone else “here have this”

psycho smiled taking wheezy's cigarette out of his pack, ohh psycho couldn’t wait to smoke just all of them did. he Pat the cigarette in his mouth like wheezy did and used a match to light it up

psycho chewed it around a little put before he blew out the word *pop!* “hehehehe” psycho giggled at seeing the best sound in the whole world before he used the smoke to light a fire pop

throwing it before it popped and when it did wheezy ears starts twitching at his laughing, smoking was tasty and if psycho did tricks they were fun but fire pops were the best things on the world!

psycho took the cigarette out of his mouth, wheezy loved these more then the rest of the friends liked air, “here wheezy! psycho doesn’t want smoke anymore” psycho told him holding it up to wheezy's lips

wheezy for once didn’t take a smoke when he could, he pushed it back which even had smarty surprised. “i still have (cough) lots of them psychs (cough)” he covered his eyes with his cap “throw it to the ground” he said

psycho nodded flicking the smoke stick away and crawling under the car to the other side and got into his seat next to smarty, “smarty driving?” psycho said

smarty always said this when he asked “if they were in dat car i woulda be halfway there psycho” he told psycho again while psycho worked on what smarty kept telling him to work on, personal space

stupid came put before greasy bumbling around till wheezy left the wall he leaned on and pushed him in the car, “gotta learn (cough) something some time stupid” he wheezed psycho smiled at the funny water sound his voice made since it made him really special like all of them

greasy stepped out locking the door but the toons smarty hates would stay out! smarty was smart at scaring toons around, then greasy strolled to the car sitting next to psycho who hugged himself

“try not to jump outta your seat psycho” greasy told psycho, psycho liked his smart voice he called it an accent from somewhere called Spanish, “thought maybe he should eh boss?” he asked smarty

psycho turned to smarty and smarty looked at him with that bossy look “that’s not happin’ psycho i’m not driving with a windshield again” he told psycho

“psycho won’t jump out of car smarty!” psycho told smarty who started driving psycho gigging as they all started the trip to the human world, the second best world there was

“alright boys ya all better have remembered everythin’ we talked about” smarty said driving fast through the streets not caring about the toons he flattened since even if they die it would kinda be a mercy kill, “cause if i gotta repeat all overa again”

greasy took out the water guns they got from a toy store they had to keep psycho before the kids started running out the store, “got the stuff right here boss” he told him simply

psycho tried hold one but greasy kept from him, “sorry nut job, but let’s just remember what you did last time with a gun” greasy told psycho

“psycho try best to shoot right and fly to” psycho told him greasy chuckling at the memory of psycho getting wheezy's pistol from em and shooting it at that martian, it send psycho flying to moon for a second before he came back down

“yeah ya did both just fine and that martian didn’t know a thing that hit em” greasy said stashing it in his coat, “but since he still got away let’s keep these to me and wheezy, oh and the boss over there” he said “the rabbit won’t know what hit em from us”

smarty made a turn into the highway, they through through the bridge everything going dark but psycho eyes that glowed, psycho started giggling

“quit doin’ dat psycho” smarty told psycho making him stop his hands weren’t long enough to pull his soul down from there

“psycho done! psycho can’t wait to see!” just then they drove into the human world! their boring not singing sun above all the buildings and sidewalks with humans and even cops walking by! psycho pushed pass greasy who moved before he got on his lap

“hehe” psycho said waving at the cops even opening the window before pulled him back in the car and in his spot

“dam it psycho i told ya ta top dat!” smarty told psycho who smiled toothy glad he still did it “better keep ya's head in da car else ya missin’ out on this” smarty told him

as they drove to the theater bugs benny was in

Chapter 2: magic in meeting a friend

Summary:

psycho gets to be in his first magic! smarty might be a bit mad at him when the shows though

Notes:

hey guys I just wanted to let you know two things if you see any spelling mistakes in smarties dialogue that’s actually on purpose. smarty has a habit of committing malapropisms and i wanted that to be in his dialogue. also I already wrote the other chapters I just need to edit them hope you guy enjoy this! remember comments and kudos are always appreciated 😁

Chapter Text

smarty parked the car like a human would in front of some large building with a lot of lights. there were some really big signs in front saying ‘come see the funniest of all’ with the silhouette of a bunny. smarty got out of the car and the rest soon followed him

greasy and stupid grabbed a drum of dip from the back of the car with some back gloves on so the dip wouldn’t touch them. they carried it inside carefully

“boss don’t ya think their gonna try ta stop us?” greasy asked

“nah, they’ll just think we’re part if the show,” smarty said

and just as smarty had said, most of the humans payed them no mind, the one’s that did only looked at them for a second before they assumed they were helping with the shows, and went back to whatever it was they were doing

“alright guys, here’s what i need yous to do” smarty said. psycho nodded along as smarty talked about his plan. but unfortunately his eyes started wandering and then they landed on a poster with on the wall just behind smarty, it was a human with colorful make up on, and he was juggling dynamite on a ball! “psycho ya have ta-. hey are ya paying attention!” smarty said noticing psycho's eyes were focused on something behind him, instead of on him like they always were when he was actually listening to him. smarty turned his head for a second to see the Poster that caught psycho's eyes. he turned back to psycho who just nodded like he thought smarty was still talking, his eyes still off him and on the poster. with a groan smarty raised his hand up to psycho's eyes and started snapping his fingers

psycho jumped a little and snapped back to reality, his eyes back on smarty who was giving that look again, greasy told him it meant he was a little annoyed, but psycho thought it looked more sleepy then annoyed. “psycho paying attention to smarty now!” psycho said standing up straight with a big smile

smarty rolled his eyes with a bit of a scowl, “whateva, just go backstage with wheezy then maybe ya can see that clown, alright” he said to psycho, who exactly nodded his head, faster then all the other weasels eyes to see. smarty put his hand on psycho’s head stopping him before stupid followed head and passed out again. “stop noddin’ ya head so fast and listen, ok” smarty said <\p>

“psycho do that!” psycho said pushing his head up so smarty would get his hand off, his spiky hair a bit messed up <\p>

“ok, i need ya ta head backstage with wheezy and wait till that Bonnie comes out or ya find him before he goes on stage got it” smarty explained trying to it as simple as he could so he wouldn’t have to repeat himself <\p>

“psycho get it!” psycho said. even if he didn’t, he knew smarty would have told him what he meant again, but he didn’t know why he didn’t do it for wheezy and stupid to. psycho grabbed wheezy by his arm and quickly ran off, dragging the taller weasel along to the backstage <\p>

“huh! thanks for not spending me with em boss” greasy said after they couldn’t see psycho or wheezy anymore<\p>

“ya just lucky your a bit stronga then wheezy, and i don’t trust stupid working with psycho” smarty said to greasy as he grabbed one side of the drum of dip as greasy grabbed the other

“heyyy where psycho and wheezy go, doesn’t smarty need to tell them his plan?” stupid asked them<\p>

wheezy pulled his arm out of psycho hand and fixed the small weasel with a bloodshot glare. “don’t grab my arm (cough) again psycho!” he said taking in a wheezy breath and a wave of smoke to psycho’s face <\p>

the weasel didn’t even blink as the smoke went into his eyes and nose. “psycho sorry, psycho got excited! and really wanna dip toon and see clown” psycho said <\p>

wheezy grumbled something under his wheezy breath. “whateva (cough) come on” he said <\p>

leading psycho to the backstage area of the theater, where bugs bunny would be performing. psycho was glad he liked to have the nails on his feet away, otherwise they would have clicked a lot on the hard uncarpeted ground of the backstage area, psycho couldn’t stop himself from looking at all the things around them back here, there all kinds of boxes around them and there was a metal catwalk above them, psycho wandered what smarty greasy and stupid were doing up there. he was looking up at it, wanting to see if he could spot smarty up there so he could wave hi, but wheezy grabbed him by his smaller shoulder and pulled him down and behind one of the boxes

“gonna have ta knock that guy out” wheezy said surprisingly not coughing. psycho hummed curiously peeking his head over the boxes and spotting the human wheezy was talking about, when he lowered his head psycho noticed something red sticking out of a little metal box, maybe that could help wheezy, psycho reached over pulled the wrench out by it’s handle. it felt really heavy, with a prove smile psycho tapped the taller weasel on his side with it <\p> wheezy turned his head from the wall he was staring at, trying to think of something when psycho tapped him with the wrench, “where ya get this from?” wheezy asked as he grabbed the metal tool by its head and then he flipped it in the air and caught it by its handle of the wrench

psycho pointed at toolbox he found it in “psycho just find it in there” he said

“um, nice job” wheezy said. he grabbed an empty park of smokes out of his hat and threw it pass the man making him turn his head away for a second. a second the tall grey weasel used to sneak up behind him and jump up a little, to whack him over the head with a quite bonk! the man fell to the side and psycho ran up to wheezy. “grab his legs” wheezy said as he threw the wrench over his shoulder where it landed on the ground that made wheezy wince a little <\p>

psycho laughed at the knocked out man since he looked funny with his tongue sucking out a little, but he was still worried about him. “psycho hope man ok” psycho said as wheezy, since psycho didn’t really help him, pushed his body into a nearby box and closed the top of it

wheezy shrugged, feeling psycho eyes on him. “he’ll live psycho on come on” he said. there was no way with how hard he hit him he’ll be dead, he’ll heal like it never happened eventually. like the others he’s knocked out in the pass, “come on” he said leading psycho away. psycho opened the top of the black box just a bit so the man could breath before he followed wheezy

now that they were in backstage where the shows would be happening, all they had to now was wait for the bunny to come out. until he did, psycho and wheezy hid behind some large boxes that made it almost impossible to see them. wheezy took the moment of peace to light up a few more cigarettes for himself while psycho stood by him trying to find something to occupy himself with

“lady’s and gentlemen!” he heard from behind him. “watch as i make something come out of!. . .my hat!” a man’s voice called out to a mostly quite room

psycho turned his head and to walked over to where the sound was coming from, which was on the big wooden stage everybody was going on. there were people performing on it, psycho had a great point of view of show and he pulled on wheezy's sleeve, wheezy deciding to get a look for himself turned his head to the show

the people who were currently performing were both humans, one was a man in a Black tux with a red bowtie with a cape on his back and a top hat with a red ring on his head

and the other was a pretty lady in a short black dress and had those weird red nets around her legs. psycho didn’t know why she was dressed like, but he really liked the little red band feather she had around her brown hair,

“huh Magic show” wheezy said casually and uninterested. he turned away from the show wanting to just enjoy his cigarettes and thing everything else in the world didn’t exist. psycho let out a excited wow that made wheezy's ears twitch a little, psycho never seemed a magic show before!

the man took off his hat and handed it to the woman who had a very fake confused look on her face. the man then snapped his fingers and pulled out a rabbit! a rabbit right out of his hat!. the woman then used a fake amazed expression on her face, psycho’s however. . .was very real

“did wheezy see that!?” psycho said his voice high, he pulled on the nicotine stained sleeve of wheezy's shirt. wheezy turned to look at the magician show just to humor psycho for a bit. just as he turned his head the magician had already made the rabbit disappear. the worst part was psycho didn’t get to see it! “aww!” psycho said

“calm down”, (cough) he’ll do more in a second” wheezy said turning his head away from the show. one of them had to keep watch for the bunny. he knew smarty wanted both of them to keep their eyes peeled for him. but psycho was just going to do it anyway, he only really listened to smarty

psycho watched as the man stepped forward and raised his hands to the audience. “lady’s and gentlemen. for my last trick! i’ll need a volunteer from the audience!” the woman took the moment of everyone having their eyes on him to relax her face and frown, psycho wondered why she looked so tired, she was got to do magic, how isn’t she having fun?

then she turned her head to the left for a second, and saw psycho. she jumped a little when she saw at first, but after a second she noticed he had a sorta nice and cheerful look to him, though his straight jacket had her a bit worried, he was a toon, and toons always wore the strangest of things

he saw her staring at him and he immediately started jumping and waving his arms, he clearly wanted to be a part of the show. and by the dead silent audience he was clearly the only one watching it who wanted to

she put on a smile and walked besides the magician and whispered into his ear while pointing her finger over at psycho, which made him start jumping and waving even more franticly like if he didn’t he wouldn’t be picked, the magician gassed and nodded with a big smirk on the greedy scum bag's face he began to wave psycho over and it was soon followed by the lady who also started waving at him. “it appears that we have our volunteer!” the man said as psycho appeared on stage. running out of the stage left and over to the lady and the magician with his arms up high in the air before he moved to stand next to the lady, some of the crowd cheered when most just remained silent. psycho knew a lot of people didn’t liked weasels. but he was sure they were just jealous they weren’t picked like he was

“now what’s your name?” the man asked him

after a few excited giggles psycho told him his name, “psycho”. he saw wheezy out of the corner of his eye, (psycho could also see smarty up in the catwalks) wheezy was grabbing his hat and pulling it downwards why did he look panicked, did he see a ghost? he began signaling for him to come back but psycho didn’t want to. it’ll only be for a second anyways

“what’s psycho doin' down where!” smarty said from the catwalk above to greasy

“uhh, he’s joining the show?” he said back to smarty with a shrug as the act continued

the man looked a bit confused, “umm” he gave the lady a look,

the lady kneeled down to psycho’s level. “alright psycho!” she said with a smile psycho knew was fake “here’s what we’re going to do” she said handing him a large thing of white fabric that resembled a blanket. she then stepped back and gestured for psycho to do the same. he walked over to her and stood beside her giving a exacted smile

if wheezy's eyes weren’t so bloodshot you could mistake them for being on fire. smarty, and greasy, and stupid were up in the catwalks with a drum of dip waiting for the bunny. he could practically feel smarty's eyes on him though wheezy couldn’t see him

“now follow my lead” she whispered to psycho, she was leaning down a bit so she was whispering in his ear, then she quickly stood up and raised the fabric above her head. psycho followed her lead and did the same. he couldn’t see the audience, or the man but he could hear them. or just the man

“now lady’s and gentlemen” he said addressing the audience “watch as i make the both of them. dis-appear!” he said

psycho giggled exactly as he heard him say that. but he wondered where he was going to spend them before he brought them back on stage. maybe it would be Hawaii! he heard that detective man when they dipped that toon shoe say that it’s supposed to be nice there this time of year

he giggled again. but to his surprise the lady tugged at his shoulder as they heard a loud boom that rang around them as smoke started to surround them. psycho turned his head to the lady, he wanted to wait and see what exploded, but he still decided to follow the woman. maybe they would walk off stage, and then they would be somewhere else in the world

the lady reached down quickly and lifted up a trapdoor! she pulled psycho down into the trapdoor and before the smoke cleared she reached up and shut the door, leaving her and psycho in almost complete darkness. psycho moved a bit trying his best to get comfy in the very cramped trapdoor. psycho moved to the side, he had to sit besides the woman’s knees, which she had to bring up to her chest just so they both could be just a little comfortable. psycho hummed a little his ear flinched a little, he heard only some of the people in the audience gasping and then it was followed by silence

“ugh! this trick of ours always was a snoozer” the magiclady said. psycho saw her put her on her forehead and dragged it down, starting her eyelids as she sighed. her mouth opened halfway as she looked forward and saw she could still see psycho’s white eyes with his blue and yellow lines moving slowly, even through the darkness she could make out some disappointment in his eyes

“psycho thought we go somewhere else” psycho said. he didn’t like it in here. greasy would call being somewhere cramped with a pretty lady a divine gift. psycho didn’t see what made it so fun, it was cramped, it was dark, and most of all! it was boring! but maybe it wasn’t all bad, at least he was with the nice lady who brought him on stage

psycho saw the lady put her hand on her cheek. he could barely hear her small chuckle. “sorry psycho, but we’re not going anywhere but here for a bit” she said. psycho gassed, with a deep frown, then he down casted his eyes. this was boring. he wondered what wheezy and others were doing. he hoped they weren’t dipping the bunny without him

“huh wish i’d brought something down here with us. it’s always so boring” the woman complaint at attempt to make conversation. psycho slowly turned his head to her, his eyes filled with excitement. a excitement she hadn’t seemed from any other toon before

“you bored too?” psycho asked

“um. yes” she said. she swore his eyes grew brighter when he heard her say that. she heard him shuffle around and dug in the neck of his straight jacket before psycho pulled out something she couldn’t see. he dragged the match he pulled out of his pocket across the ground. “oh you brought matches” she said

she heard psycho let out another chuckle as the dim light match lit up a bit of the trapdoor they were in. just a second after the match was lit psycho moved the dim match to something in his other sleeved covered hand. the lady couldn’t make out what it was and her question to what he was doing died just as it’s fuss start hissing! psycho lit the fuss with a yellow toothed crazed smile on his face that showed more psychotic excitement then any other smile he’s even showed

“and now they shall appear-“ the magician was interrupted by the sound of his assistant screaming below the stage. the audience gasped thinking this was all part of the trick not seeing the worry on his face. wheezy looked to the ground where the screaming was coming from and then to the audience, no way this wasn’t causing attention!

the trapdoor was suddenly kicked open and the lady shot out of it like she was being chasing by a monster trying to kill her. she didn’t get far before she fell on her face thanks to the stupid high heels he made her wear, her hands taking most of the impact thankfully but that was the last of her concerns right now

psycho stuck his head out before he climbed out of the trapdoor with a couple of lit firecrackers in his hands. the small weasel blinked ‘why the lady ran out like that, the firepops were about to pop!’ psycho thought as he looked to the fuses of the firecracker in his sleeved hand

“psycho! throw the firecrackers before they explode” wheezy yelled

psycho looked away from the fuses to wheezy and with a small grin he threw them just as their fuses were about to reach their end, they landed on the ground in front of the magician's feet and. to psycho's delight popped one after the other. but he frowned as something unexpected happened. the stupidly long Cape of the magician caught on fire!

“huh! ahhhhhh!” he scared. running around the stage. and the audience just started to die laughing thinking this was all part of his act, they laughed as those they were watching a toon perform. his assistant quickly ran off stage left to get the fire extinguisher the building knelt for emergencies, almost falling on her again as she ran pass a tall grey weasel

she quickly found the fire extraneous on the wall nearby. she took off one of her heels and used it to break the glass of it’s container and ran back to the stage. the scene she came back to made her feel like she were on some sitcom, the magician was on the ground his hat off his head as it had fallen off from his rolling on the ground, screaming all the while and the audience laughing hysterically, before she could aim the extraneous at him, wheezy walked up from behind and easily snatched it out of her distracted hands

“son of a” smarty said stopping himself from completing that sentence. “stupid get down there and put that idiot out before that fire spreads!” he ordered stupid who nodded with his tongue sticking out of the side of his lips. he was about to jump but greasy stopped him

“don’t jump! just run!” he yelled almost letting go of the drum of dip

“ohhhhhhh” stupid said taking out his bat and running down the catwalk to the stairs

wheezy aimed the hose at the man who was still rolling on the floor, he was about to put the idiot out when some other idiot bumped into him knocking the fire extinguisher out of his hands to the ground

“oh sory wheezy” stupid said he had tripped on his untied shoelaces again!

“darn it stupid!” wheezy said getting up from the floor and scrambling to get the fire extinguisher. before he could psycho had picked it up, wanting to out the fire since he knew smarty would want him to. psycho quickly aimed the hose at the man like wheezy did and pulled the trigger causing the carbon dioxide inside to spray out of the extinguisher. instead of it just putting out the man the Force of the fire extinguisher made psycho to begin flying around the stage Area like he was a ricocheting bullet

The audience were laughing hysterically to the point that if they were toons they would be dead by now. wheezy, stupid, smarty and greasy watch psycho as he went all around quickly laughing like he was on a roller coaster. at one point he was on top of it like he was riding a bull!

soon the air shooting out began to turn to coughs as the fire extinguisher let out the last of it’s air. he was right above smarty and greasy when it stopped. he saw smarty had a very perplexed look on his face and waved hi to him and greasy. . .then he felt the air whipping around him as he started falling to the ground!

miraculously The magician managed to put himself out. realizing he wasn’t somehow burned or hurt he stood up and straighten out his now burned tux, pretending all of that was part of his act. like he always did whenever he ended his show he walked forward and raised his arms in the air and bowed like he was the only one working for the show. he wondered why they weren’t applauding, they usually be applauding him for his show whenever he bowed

just as he was about to lift his head up, hopping that’ll get his audience abiding him, something fell right on top of him

psycho shook his head smiling, noticing he wasn’t hurt at all, and his fell didn’t feel like it pain too, something must’ve broken his fall. psycho looked down to see what it was. oh! it was the magician. psycho had landed right on his back, he wasn’t sure if he was hurt or not but he did think he heard a small snap when he landed on him. but at least he broke his fall! psycho should give him a firepops laster as a thank you for being nice to catch him!. . .and maybe some more as sorry to

some people in the audience gashed and psycho turned his head to them

he only blinked when somebody suddenly dropped the magicians hat on top of his head, the hat fell forehead on his head covering his eyes. then he heard the same somebody called out to the audience. psycho’s ear picking up on their voice sounded like a lady’s “lady’s and gentlemen! psycho. . .the. . .” psycho pushed the hat back a bit, and he gasped seeing it was the lady who brought him on stage! she looked at the small weasel for a second before she quickly turned back to the audience in front of them. “psycho! the outrageous!” she called out

she on psycho’s left both of her hands gesturing to him like he was the star of the show! after a second of silents one parson in the audience started clapping! and then the rest of started clapping and whistling! the entire room was soon filled with the of their applause! psycho smiled and waved goodbye as a large red curtain fell in front of him. ending what mush have been one of the funniest times of his life!

once the curtain fell down psycho got up as the lady approached him, “ya know sad thing is, that. . .was our best show yet” she said. psycho getting off of the man for her. “oh and your friend is waiting for you over there. you’ve better run, he sounded pretty mad, through i couldn’t over all his coughing” she said to psycho

“psycho have to go back to friend, but psycho had lots of fun with lady and magic man!” psycho said waving goodbye to her and the man

“yeah. i guess i did to, anyway i gotta go, hope to see you weasel!” she said waving goodbye to psycho as she started pulling the man off stage right. psycho turned around and started walking back to wheezy. seeing stupid sitting on a box next to him just out of sight of everyone unless you were looking for them

wheezy's eyes were like daggers trying to cut him down as psycho walked back to wheezy and stupid. but wheezy's eyes did nothing to psycho as he didn’t regret a thing! but he did hope smarty wasn’t mad. he had a lot of fun and he would do it again if he could. maybe next time he could bring smarty on stage! as he was walking to them, while psycho was off stage and out of sight of everybody in the audience, a tall and thin bunny toon with white gloves on and grey fur came up to him with a impressed smile

“hey nice job kid, ya might’ve just made me have to work for this” the bunny said as he started stride to the stage and waited for the announcer

a man in a suit came up on stage. “lady’s and gentlemen! last but not lest give it up for! bugs bunny!” the started clapping as the tall bunny was about to make his entrance

but realizing the tall bunny was the bunny they were after psycho quickly jumped forward and tackled his back pinning him to the ground. “uh. hey kid if you wanted an autograph ya could’ve asked” bugs said beneath the weasel who was exactly waving over to wheezy and stupid

“ya know i can’t give ya one if you don’t-hey!hands off the tail!!” bugs bunny yelled as his face burned an apple red from psycho squeezing his tail painfully and dragged him by it somewhere he couldn’t see. “security kid! i don’t even let the girls touch it what makes you think i’m ok with you touching it” bugs said trying to stand but the weasel was moving fast enough to make it hard for him

stupid laughed seeing psycho drag the bunny over while wheezy raised an eyebrow at him. psycho stopped right in front with the bunny behind like some kind of trophy with a prove smile

wheezy took a drag off his cigarette and walked around psycho and bugs to get a look at the bunny and make sure psycho got the right guy

“ahh hey! you!” bugs called out to wheezy looking pretty embarrassed by how he must have looked like with his face all red and on the floor with a hand squeezing his tail “tall and grey weasel over there, yeah you, mind telling your friend to get his hands off of my tail” bugs pleaded

wheezy smirked and leaned to blow a cloud of smoke in the bunny’s face making him Winkle his nose and cough. while he was coughing out some of the smoke wheezy leaned back up not wanting his back to get its revenge in the morning

“ya heard him psycho let em up” wheezy said. psycho turned his head to him but he gave him a wink. psycho let go of his tail which earned him a reviled sigh from bugs who was about to get off the ground when stupid jumped on his back knocking the wind out of him

“hey! real funny! now get your other friends off me” bugs said out of breath

wheezy ignored him and had psycho go get smarty and greasy up in the catwalks while he and stupid did the other work. “psycho go get smarty and greasy” psycho said

“hey greasy ya seem that guy down there?” smarty asked as he carefully looked below them to the stage below. the crowd below were getting a bit restless and impatient for the bunny bastard while the announcer was panicking and trying to stalled the audience before they left

“nah boss, bunny's nowhere i can see” greasy said noticing something in white waving it’s hand while jumping in air seemingly trying to get their attention. “hey is that psycho down there? and who’s that poor guy stupid's sitting on?”

smarty took a look to where greasy was looking and spotted what he saw. “hay, that’s psycho down there, and that guy is that bunny we gonna digged”

“dip boss” greasy collected. smarty glared at him like he was gonna throw him off the catwalk if he did that again. “umm, sorry boss” he said

“whatever lets just dumb this hem already” smarty said. greasy had to stop himself from collecting him again. they both put the top of the barrel of dip on and picked it up with the black glove in case some of it was leaking through and got on them

“come on guys get off me, in case you didn’t notice i got a show to do” bugs bunny complained trying to throw stupid off of him to no avail. the fat weasel was pulling and playing with his ears, better then his tail like that crazy one over by the boxes. this couldn’t get any worst!

smarty and greasy finally came down from the catwalk and smiled at the bunny trapped underneath stupid. “well now, who do we have here?” greasy asked as he walked up to get a better look at the bunny

“what! ain’t you guys heard of me? i’m bugs bunny! the world greatest here! that crazy one over there couldn’t get his hands off my tail!” bugs said. smarty looked at psycho with his noes wrinkled

“psycho go waste ya hands” he said to which psycho nodded and ran off to go wash his hands. “now onto you” he said which made bugs shiver a bit

“greasy get the dip out and some rope” smarty said taking out his gun and pointing it in bugs's noes so he would get the Message not to move. most toon forgot they were indestructible and bugs bunny was no exception

his eyes were stuck on the barrel of the gun Shoved in his noes as his face seemed to lose some color. “wait a second…i know you guys! your the toon portal!” bugs yelled in realization

“that’s us (cough) bunny boy” wheezy said with another cough at end. he helped greasy tie his arms around his chest and his legs together while he was trapped underneath stupid

smarty told stupid to stand up and and grab bugs off the ground and don’t let him go for a second. which he did, bugs bunny took in a breath when he got off him only for it to be squeezed out of him by stupid wrapping him in a bear hug from he behind all while the ropes they had on him burned his fur

he remembered the last time he was tied up like this with that witch. how did he get out of that again? bugs made his eyes bigger and wet and even made some tears roll down his cheeks. “cou-could you guys find it in your heart to let little old me go?” he pleaded his ace on the hole never failed him

smarty smirked at him. “save ya self the waterworks, ain’t working on none of us” he said as he and the other weasels used a back door to an alleyway. “keep an eye outta psycho, he’ll want ta see this” he said to wheezy who gave him a yellow tooth smile and waited by the door keeping it open by leaning back on it

“com-come on gu-guys…i didn’t do anything…and if i did shouldn’t i be taken to court” bugs begged his mind racing to try to think of a way out of being dipped

“sorry but nah ˈbənē. and those are more kangaroo courts anyway so ya situation wouldn’t be any different” greasy said looking around to find something that he could use as a makeshift item that would make this part of the job a bit easier. he found it

greasy walked over to it and picked it up out of a dirty puddle of water

greasy walked over to bugs with the wet bandanna in hand and smiled at his face turning a sickly green. “come on doc if ya gonna gag at least do it with some-“ bugs was cut off by the gag being tied around his mouth from behind

greasy waffled his head between his ears and walked away from him. “hey psycho through here” wheezy called out to psycho who quickly jumped through the door into the alley

“alright, now that everyone is here. we need to get this done now” smarty said opening the dip up. the green sludge was fizzy when it was opened and even had some smoke coming off of it

bugs started talking behind the gag trying to say something as stupid dropped him to the ground, whatever he was saying was mostly drowned out by the sound of a lot of a liquid being pour onto something

and then, just like that…the great bugs bunny was a grey puddle on the floor

everyone laughed. but then looked around, something was missing, why weren’t they hearing psycho giggling? he’d usually be giggling enough for smarty to remind him to stop before he ended up like smarty’s cousins

after the grey ink like sludge that used to be bugs bunny went down a nearby drain all eyes were on psycho. psycho seemed to be deep in thought, the rings in his eyes moving slower in concentration like he was staring off into space

after a second of everyone waiting for one of them to shake him out of whatever thoughts his mind was thinking, smarty stepped towards him while most of the others watched him

“psycho ya in there?” smarty said shaking his shoulders stopping for a second to wave his hand in psycho’s face. psycho’s eyes started following smarty’s hand. so smarty let go of his shoulders and stepped back

psycho shook his head and smiled. “dip the bunny!” he cheered exactly

smarty looked at the bit of grey ink that was leftover of the bunny. “sorry ta me the one to tell ya this psycho but you missed it” smarty said pointing at the puddle

“awwww” psycho whipped dropping his arms

“sorry but it’s kinda ya own fault” smarty said with a shrug

“why was your mind in the clouds anyway” greasy asked psycho while all of them started leaving the alley bringing the now empty barrel of dip with them so no one would get any ideas

“psycho think about something” was all the answer greasy got. psycho was wondering when he’ll see that nice lady again, maybe he’ll again soon. aww but he was still sad he didn’t get to the bunny get dipped

Chapter 3: a quick drink before home

Notes:

hope you guys are still enjoying :)

Chapter Text

need less to say smarty wasn’t too happy about psycho going on stage and causing a big scene like that. but wheezy and greasy had reminded him that they still got bugs so he let it go, not after reminding psycho to stay put when he tells him to. psycho wasn’t really listening, his mind was a bit too preoccupied

he wondered where was the lady. was she in the hospital with the magician, she seemed nice and that’s what nice people did, or maybe she was in her home right now, maybe reading a book or maybe watching tv. psycho liked watching the news. especially with smarty

before they had to go back to toon town. they needed to see judge doom and tell him about it. he’ll make sure the word gets out in toon town and he would pay them. smarty parked the car by his office, a building looking a bit like their own but smaller and with less windows. smarty went in his office and came out a few minutes later and hopped back in the car with some envelopes with their names on it

“here ya go guys, job will done” smarty said handing out the envelopes around the car while handing psycho’s to him since he was sitting shotgun

“how about we reward ourselves with a few drinks eh boss” greasy suggested everyone else agreeing with him, except for psycho

smarty thought about it, he suppose they all earned a reward for the work they did. Plus anything was better then heading back to toon town. “alright boys let get a drink” smarty said the rest of weasels cheering just a bit except for stupid who was overly cheerful

—-

they pulled up to a bar, it was a decent sized building. a bit dingy looking but clean enough and had a good crowd of people in it, more fun then violent kinda drunks here. they all got out of the car and walked into the bar

the bar crowd was something psycho appreciated. they were funny, and did things that were impossible not to laugh at. greasy said he only really appreciated the cute ones. but psycho didn’t see why he didn’t like all of them. and what made someone cute anyway? they’re not puppies

“eh psycho wanna play eye spy” greasy asked after psycho took another swag of his Planters punch, a drink that sounded more fun then it was

“ohhhhh! yeah yeah! psycho wanna play eye spy!” psycho said nodding excitedly looking around things he could spy

“ok, i spy my little eye something beautiful~” greasy said pointing at a lady sitting at a table all alone, she had black hair and was in a dress. she looked like what greasy would call pretty and had a cigarette holder sloppily placed in her fingers like she was about to drop it. wheezy didn’t like cigarette holders, he said holders just get rid of most of the taste of the cigarettes. “here psycho, let me give you a hint” greasy said with a wink and Guin that everyone from the toon patrol knew all to well

greasy made his way to the girl with confident strides leaning back as he did. “looks like greasy is too preoccupied to (cough) join me for a smoke” wheezy said with another cough filled with the smell of nicotine and a click of his lighter

“hey buddy mine if you take that outside” the bartender said. it clearly wasn’t a question, more like a demand. wheezy would normally say no and then a fight would likely break out. but he was a little buzzed right now and he knew better then to fight when he was drunk

he wanted to get some fair air anyway. he first had to tell smarty so he wouldn’t leave without him. “hey boss” he said with a wheezy few couches. smarty looked up from the pool table and sighed, he was about to make a good shot too. “i’m gonna (conch) head out for a quick smoke” he said

smarty turned to him with the pool cue on his shoulder as stupid took advantage of him not looking and tried testing one of the pool ball “go ahead, but ya better not stay there foreva” smarty said turning back to see stupid licking the 8ball “get that outta ya mouth!” smarty yelled as wheezy made his way to the backdoor

psycho followed him outside wanting to get some firepops from a shop he knew was nearby. maybe he should buy some for smarty, he still needed to say sorry though he was sorry, he still felt like he should say it, and firepops would make it even better of a sorry

wheezy pushed the door open with his shoulder and walked out, psycho moved quickly out the door before it closed like it was a game

“oh (conch) didn’t know you were followin'” wheezy said leaning back on a wall and lighting two more cigarettes for himself

“psycho going to buy more fire pops” psycho said with a joyful smile on his face showing his Sharp teeth

“alright don’t be (cough) gone too long” wheezy said exhaling some smoke as psycho walked off. he had a feeling psycho was going to get into some mischief and considered following him. but decided not to, he could take care of himself, he didn’t need a babysitter out there

and he rather finesse smocking first anyway

Chapter 4: meeting a friend again

Chapter Text

psycho walked forward with a smile. after a few minutes he was in front of one of the many stores that sold psycho beloved firecrackers.

it was a small building and looked like a ma and pa shop with a red awning and two big windows in front with some stuff on display, the toys looked fun but psycho had a lot of toys just like them and he just wanted to buy firepops

psycho walked to the door and stopped to read the sign on the door, “closed”

he entered the store anyway ignoring the closed sig, there was someone inside restocking shelves. he was in a suit and tie with what psycho was sure wheezy would call a baby face. but he didn’t look like a baby to psycho so he didn’t get it

“hey bud sign said we’re closed” the man said to the weasel. psycho ignored him and looked around for them, he knew they were here. the man got off the ladder he was using to stock the higher shelves. “hey you can’t be in here come back tomorrow!” he called out

psycho only looked over his shoulder at him for a second before turning back to the shelves. where were they? maybe they were in the back. psycho though as he went behind the counter into the backroom. the man stopped him by irritatedly grabbing psycho by his shoulder and yawned him back

“hey! your not supposed to be back there! employees only! now get out of here before i call the pol-“

he was cut off by psycho pulling out his switchblade and pointing it at his chest. the man immediately threw his hands in the air. “he-hey take it easy there” he said shakily as he backed up into some shelves. he swept and fell to the ground, bringing the shelves he backed into with him some of the items on one of the shelves falling on top of him

psycho gassed and his eyes filled with excitement as he saw the world’s greatest toy on the man's lap. he Quickly snatched them and held them to his chest like someone would a loved one. “psycho want these!” he said and the man shakily raised an eyebrow

“um..you want…to buy. those” he asked

“yes! yes! psycho want them all” he said pulling out his money and handing it to the man. the man took it hesitantly and handed him some of the firecrackers that were behind him and the rest that were around him and handed them to psycho who looked overjoyed with the amount he was given

“um…come again” the man said as psycho left his Store waving goodbye to him as he left. he counted the money he gave him. it was only one dollar, the amount he gave the weasel was worth 5 dollars but he wasn’t going to Chase after him. he was a toon with a switchblade and looked ready to use it just for the fun of it. he’d be crazier then him if he did that

psycho walked through the streets back to the bar, his pockets failed with firecrackers. he noticed the sun was setting, giving the sky a slight orange color to its already blue coloring. psycho liked the sky when it was colorful,

psycho turned a corner. he knew there a park near here he liked a lot, he should walk through it for fun and it was a shortcut to get back to the bar faster,

he walked through the iron gate that everyone walked through when they were leaving or going in for a fun day with their family and friends. psycho took one of the newly brought firecrackers and wasted no time lighting and throwing it at the ground and laughing when it popped

but when psycho was about to light the fuse of another one he saw someone on a bench beneath a light post that wasn’t on yet

psycho stopped in his tracks and squinted at the parson, he had really good eyes. he could tell it was a lady, she was laying back on the bench with her eyes down. psycho stuffed the air and caught a look at her face when she looked hearing a bird fly by and land in a tree

it was the lady! she wasn’t wearing the dress and pantyhose though. so it was harder for him to recognize her from where he was standing

after a second psycho approached her with a friendly smile. she wasn’t noticing him though, she was looking down at the road beneath their feet, psycho knew what that meant, she needed to be cheered up!

“helloo” psycho said still a few feet away waving hi to her

she looked up to see psycho. he looked happy to see her. a look she hasn’t gotten in awhile. “oh! hi, psycho right?” she asked and he nodded once he was next to her. “well it’s nice to see you again, case you were wondering he’s gonna be fine” psycho raised an eyebrow like he knew she was exaggerating. “in a couple of months” she said with a shrug, she took out a cigarette from the pocket of the light brown coat she was wearing and lighting it with a lighter she pulled from her other pocket

“psycho happy to see you again” he said sitting down on the bench while she chuckled

“oh, well i’m call me flattered” she said putting her hand on her chest for a second, before going back to smoking the cigarette she had in her hand. “you wanna know, i never thought i came out here just to be a assistant to a failing stealing magician” she said with a sigh

“why you come to here?” psycho asked turning to her his eyes weren’t blinking

she sighed “wanna hear about someone pathetic ok, believed it or not i wanted to an actress. i know really original, but i thought once i came out here i would be in shows and movies and become a big start,” she turned her head to the side “it’s too bad my brain only got bug after i left my home” she said putting her soon to be dead cigarette and taking one long drag of it then throwing it away like someone did to her

“psycho know you can do it!” psycho said then hopping off of the bench and moving so he was standing in front of where she was looking. greasy taught him that if he looked in lady’s eyes they’ll know you mean what you say to them

she was taken a back his face suddenly jumping in front of her and she sat a bit away from the pep talking weasel “psycho what do you mean” she asked

“psycho think you be actress!” he said hopping ip the arm rest and standing on it

she couldn’t help but envy all that optimism of his. “psycho, i’m a drop on her luck actress i’m lucky enough to have my scraped and slapped together home, every interviewer i went to said no cause i wasn’t good or they found their star before i got there. most of my luck went away after that took as his assistant” she said she hated it but she’ll catch her death if she didn’t keep the job and the magic man just loved reminding of that

psycho thought for a minute before coming up with something. “keep trying” he said with a smile showing her his Sharp teeth. that looked sharper than his switchblade sometimes, smarty always said failing isn’t real being lazy was!

the lady was taken aback by his teeth so she sat a bit backer from him “psycho i tried, everything whatever acting job I could find either didn’t picked me or them already found their star! all i can do now is find some other job toll he’s out of the hospital” she said, she remembered a talk she had with joe and she reached down into her pocket

psycho saw her take a part of paper out of her pocket and crumbled the sides of it in her fist. psycho tried to see what the paper was but she yanked it away from him and stuffed it back in her pocket

“psycho think you can do it!” psycho said standing on the bench to face her. “and psycho know you can be best actor ever!” he said. she only smiled at him and blinked

“what do you want to say psycho! i mean we’re in Hollywood! there’s 100s of starry eyed and idiot girls thinking they’ll make it big like me, i’m sorry, psycho i can’t keep trying like this“ she said shaking her head in defeat breaking eye contact with the weasel who wasn’t going to give even if there was a fight

“yes you can” psycho said taking a step forward off the arm rest and onto the wood of the bench

“psycho i told you i-“

“yes you can!” psycho said irritating her. “psycho think you can be actress, you keep trying, psycho not ever give up you try and keep trying” psycho said to her. it felt like he was giving her a Pep talk…like someone else used to give her when she wanted to give up at the train station that took from their home, a boring but, peaceful home, she almost wished she never met him after they stepped off the train, but the weasel like any thing but that side if him

“psycho. . .” she said pausing. psycho tilted his head taking a step back from her waiting for what she was going to say. “your right. . .i shouldn’t give on my dream just yet” she said. “ok you win psycho, i’ll keep trying to become an actress” she said, she couldn’t believe it but he did beat her, she guessed a silver tongue was something he had to, psycho gratefully gassed and cheered when she said that. he whipped forward and hugged her shoulder

she starred at the weasel holding her shoulder, she put a hand on his head patting it. after a short minute she felt like it lasting too long and broke before she stayed the night here. psycho took it well to her surprise and sat back down kicking his legs back and forth “thank you, feeling naïve again feels, better then i remember”

“psycho happy to make you happy” psycho answered

after a few minutes of them watching the orange sky turn a dark blue. the lady reached back in her pocket and took out a Pack of cigarettes. she opened it hoping to see at least one cigarette in the small box, but to her dismay there was nothing but air “should have bought another one” she complain leaning back in the bench

she heard something that sounded like a match being lit and looked over to psycho who had lit a match and pulled out a firecracker. she felt like an idiot realizing back in the trap he was just holding firecrackers, and her idiot brain thought it was dynamites

she was surprised when instead of lighting the fuse for himself, he instead offered it to her. “psycho promise lady like it too” he said

she would have said no, but it wasn’t like she had a reason not to, so she gave in. she took the match and firecracker from psycho and lit the fuss. she chalked it at the ground a bit too soon for psycho’s liking, though he still laughed when it popped. she didn’t see what was so enjoyable about it

psycho pulled another one out and lit the fuse. he’ll show her how it’s really done. he let it cock for a bit before he threw it. when he did it popped before it could hit the ground. he again laughed, there was nothing more satisfying to him, every pop was like music to his ears

“don’t see why you like these so much, but i have smocking sometimes and that’s not really fun” she said with a shrug. accepting the firecrackers psycho had offered her again. she lit the fuse and this time let it cock just as long as psycho did before she threw it at a tree where it landing on top of it. once it popped a toon bird came flying out of the tree and hit the ground at their feet

the bird coughed and shook his head, he gave psycho a glare that said ‘you again!’ like he was his nemesis or something

psycho only smiled sinisterly at the bird and threw another firecracker at him. the bird barely avoiding the firecrackers but didn’t avoid the small explosion. which spelt it flying back, some of it’s light blue and yellow feathers flying off from the explosion. it coughed out some black smoke and flew away as psycho threw another firecracker at him

psycho ran after him throwing a few more firecrackers at him. the lady watched him run across the perk bewildered but figured since she should saw that coming. he was a toon after all. he come back with his head down in defeat. “psycho didn’t get him” he pouted

the lady crossed her legs with a smile leaning a bit to him. “aww i’m sure you’ll get him one day” she said beginning to laugh. a real smile on her face. it felt funny, she hadn’t smiled like she used too in a long time

psycho heard her laughing and looked up seeing a smile on her face. he smiled as well and she just rolled her eyes “what? i can smile too you know” she said jokingly

psycho laughed at her joke and seat back down on the bench. “psycho happy you smiled” psycho said she looked at him for a second, before opening her mouth and saying

“hey psycho, it just occurred to me I haven’t told you my name. it’s Jennifer, Jennifer foray” she said holding out her hand

“psycho think name sounds pretty” psycho said taking her hand and shaking it, once it was done and he had his hand back he he lit up yet another firecracker and threw it at the ground

Jennifer chuckled at his complement, “thank you” she said taking the firecracker he handed to her. she lit it up and threw at the ground. once it popped she turned her gaze to the stars above them as psycho laughed. she closed her eyes and breathed deeply.

a curious high pierced hmmm brought her back to Reality. psycho was offering her another firecracker. “as much as i would love to spent all night here with you, I have to go home, actors do need their sleep” jennifer gingerly said getting up from the bench

psycho frowned, his eyes down casted to the ground. Jennifer frowned. she bended her knees down a bit to his eye level. “hey it’s not like we’re never gonna see each other again, here” she said handing him her phone number. “call me tomorrow got it, i’ll need your help getting an acting job” she said

psycho took the piece of paper in his both of his hands. he looked at it like it was the most amazing thing he’s ever seen and nodded “psycho promises” he said putting a hand to his heart like he was swearing an oath

Jennifer laughed at that “have a good night psycho” she said standing and waving goodbye as she walked off “can’t wait to hear from you tomorrow” she said. psycho nodded waving back.

“psycho can’t wait too!” he called out. once she was out of sight he turned around and made his way to the bar

Chapter 5: back to the bar

Chapter Text

wheezy was chain smoking a bit more then he would normally. not like he had anything better to do, and he didn’t have much smokes today anyway, plus he felt like he should wait for psycho in case the others were about to leave them here

he heard psycho’s familiar giggling and sighed at the bit of a annoying sound. he noticed psycho’s giggling sounded more happy then usual. he didn’t think that was possible. psycho had his arms around himself tightly

“psycho where have (cough) ya been?” wheezy asked taking a drag off of his cigarettes with another cough

“psycho made new friend!” psycho announced as he excitedly giggled to himself. he walked over and stood besides wheezy still hugging himself warmly

“oh? and…where, are they” wheezy said leaning a bit forward and looking around, psycho wouldn’t make a imaginary friend right, he wasn’t that crazy

“psycho's friend in her home” psycho answered turning his head to wheezy, the lines in his eyes moving just a bit faster then normal

wheezy sighed and leaned back into the wall…he would have had a much harder time workibv with em if he did make an imaginary friend for himself

‘wait…did psycho said her?’ wheezy thought turning his eyes to psycho who was now sitting on the ground, a match in one hand and a firecracker in the other

“psycho, did you meet…a girl?” wheezy asked

“yes! psycho meet jennifer!” psycho said as he lit the fuse of the firecracker and threw it at the wall of the other building in front of them

‘huh, psycho got himself a doll’. wheezy laughed at the thought as he flicked the butt of the last cigarette he had in his mouth. he wondered what greasy would say, he couldn’t get a girl tonight but psycho did. he just might eat his hat out of envy. well, only one way for him to find out, wheezy went back in the building and psycho followed him after the firecracker he threw popped

they walked and took their seats next to smarty. he had his hat off on the counter in front of them and was resting his cheek on his pam

psycho looked around and saw greasy was still chatting up the girl he had pointed out to him earlier. the lady was moving her back and forth, psycho hoped she would stop that, it wasn’t fun to do that

psycho took his switchblade out and started carving things into the wooden counter. he saw wheezy and smarty get up from their seats after talking and walked to the pool tables. psycho saw them and he quickly followed them wanting to play too.

bringing the drink smarty had left behind with him. smarty was lining up his shot when psycho came over, greasy joined in too and handled psycho the same stick everyone else was holding

right when he was about to shoot his shot and hit the 8 ball wheezy let out a very loud cough, causing smarty’s shot to instead bounce off the corner of the table and hit stupid right in his mouth spending him into the wall

he hit the wall so hard one of the many pictures on it fell right onto his head and stayed around his neck like some sort of Square necklace. stupid shook his head and lifted his head unknowingly showing the 8 ball in his mouth

psycho, wheezy, greasy, and smarty began laughing. psycho laughed so hard the glass he was going to hand to smarty broke in his hand, thankfully the sleeve of his straight jacket stopped the glass pieces from cutting his hand. wheezy and greasy were laughing just as hard. so hard they had to lean on each other so they wouldn’t fell over

“stopped that laughing ya mugs!” smarty yelled, having stopped his laughing. they didn’t listen so he rushed over to wheezy and greasy. he grabbed them by their heads and knocked them against each other. some stars starting flying around their heads as smarty walked over to psycho who was laughing on the ground. smarty picked up a glass bottle and broke over his head

the glass barely did anything. but it did stop psycho’s laughing before he laughed himself to death. “already, get up psycho and let’s get outta here and back ta home, i’ve had enough of you pains in the neck for one day” smarty said. he helped psycho off the ground by his forearm while everyone else helped themselves up and followed him outside knowing that the bartender was going to kick them out anyway, Plus smarty was the one with the keys

smarty took shotgun this time letting wheezy take the wheel. psycho sat in the back with greasy, letting stupid sit up front with wheezy and smarty since he was in such a great mood. “this was a nice night don’t ya think psycho” greasy said “that girl was really a treat, to bad she was to drunk for my taste though”

psycho nodded agreeing with greasy, it really was a nice night, he got to be in his first magic show, dipped a toon (though he missed it) and best of all made a new friend. he took out the part of paper she had wrote her number on, making sure he memorized every number on it in case it went missing

greasy noticed the piece of paper and gave psycho a smile like he was prove of him. “ya met a doll of your own too eh?” he said. psycho smiled and scooted over to show him the paper. “huh! good ta hear i’m not the only lady killer ‘ere” he said

“hey i like to think of myself as a (cough) lady killer” wheezy said between his coughs smart enough to keep his eyes on the road during them

“ya kiddin' wheezy, with your coughin’ you’re going ta get a girl sick before ya get her number” greasy said

“shut up!” wheezy said pulling out his pack of cigarettes and taking two of them out of the box. he made a turn and entered toon town.

right off the bet the moon locked it’s eyes on them as they drove through toon town. not everyone knew this but on rare occasions it was quiet here. almost peaceful. the only time any of them could tolerate toon town. too bad it didn’t stay like this

soon the sun would come up and the toons would wake up, and then they would be reminded why they hated toons so much

eventually wheezy pulled up to their office and parked the car just like it was parked before they had left to go deal with that bunny. one by one everyone got out of the car and closed the door leaving the car like it hadn’t been touched in years

“hey psycho how about you call that of yours tomorrow” greasy said to him before he left with smarty to their home

psycho smiled and nodded “psycho do that!” he said and greasy laugh. as much as he wanted to meet this girl he didn’t want to mess this up for psycho, wouldn’t be fun

“psycho hope jennifer can psycho can do something tomorrow” psycho said to greasy

“ha! you and me both buddy” greasy said

“hey! psycho, came on it’s too late for you and greasy ta be talkin' for so long” smarty called out on the other side of the alley

“good night greasy” psycho said as he whipped around and ran over to smarty

“night nut job” he said walking out of the alley to his home which was close enough for him to walk there

“what you him talk bout” smarty asked

“psycho and greasy talk about tomorrow” he said with a yawn

smarty didn’t want to ask what he meant by that, and just crossed the road to their home

Chapter 6: The call and the audition

Summary:

it’s always nice to call up a friend and even better to help a friend with something

Chapter Text

psycho walked over to his desk which was next to smarty’s office. psycho liked the desk smarty gave him, he said it was made out of oak so it was a lighter color then wheezy's and greasy's, there were a lot of intricate carvings into the wood that psycho did with his switchblade. things like shapes and animals. he also had some souvenirs from some places he’s been to. some of them were toys and some of them were from some of the other toons they dipped. smarty said he didn’t care when he asked if he could have some of their stuff, so he took whatever looked the funnest

he hopped in his chair and scooted closer to the desk, he reached forward and grabbed the black phone with one hand and grabbed a jack in a box toy he got from a shop off his desk with the other. he slowly began cranking The lever as he quickly dialed in the number he’s been dying to call

psycho looked at a nearby window. the sun came up 3 hours ago so she had to be up now ring! ring! ring!

“hello” jennifer said sounding like she had just woken up

“helloo” psycho said into the phone. he heard jennifer yawn deeply and take a sip of something. greasy gave psycho a smirk like he caught him doing something awful

“well. it’s good to know you hadn't forgot about me psycho” jennifer said with a tired smile. she never was an earlier raiser. she had only woken up an hour ago so she still had some waking up to do

psycho gassed. jennifer couldn’t tell if it was a real gas or if he was just exaggerating like toons often did without knowing. “psycho never forget you!” psycho said and she couldn’t help but be a bit flattered. she hear someone else laugh in the background of wherever psycho was.

“hehe, real lady kill eh psycho. and here i thought ya only love ya switchblade” greasy said still watching psycho on the phone. psycho turned to greasy looking up from the jack in a box in his lap

there was a click of something and she couldn’t really hear what psycho's friend was saying. “easy there romeo, no need ta get ya switchblade in this. i’ll leave the two of you alone” greasy said looking away from psycho. he could still hear psycho but he knew psycho didn’t know that. why was greasy looking away? psycho thought he wanted to see his switchblade

“was that your friend?” jennifer said reaching for her beat up coffee mug and took a sip of the poor coffee she had in it. the coffee making she had worked just find but her stove was starting to break down. one of the only things it was good for now was making coffee since the oven didn’t work, and embarrassingly she couldn’t afford groceries leaving her having to eat at a lot of diners. and then running out of said diners

“psycho’s friend is greasy” psycho said. letting out a high pitched giggling fit once the jack in a box popped out

“um. your friend is greasy? what? does mean his name is greasy cause if so, that has to be a toon name, either way that name’s a funny one” jennifer commented setting her coffee mug on her kitchen counter which could use some-a lot of cleaning

“psycho think his name funny. . .dose jennifer want to meet him?” psycho said playing with the crank of the jack in a box, the toy itself was placed on his lap and was leaning down on his stomach for support

“maybe. later, i heard a little while back there’s a theater having auditions for a roll in their play, it’s next to that bar. . .what was it called? i had it written down somewhere here” she said. there was some scuffling till jennifer came back on the phone. “it’s the ink and paint club, i was hoping you could come with me, actually” jennifer said. “if you want”

“yes psycho coming!” psycho said into the phone with his voice so high jennifer had to reel back from it in surprise, her ear ringing, she could still hear psycho saying something so she moved the phone to her other ear, keeping a distance just in case. “psycho be right there, bringing fire pops to” he said

“um, we can pop those after i guess” jennifer said quickly finishing her coffee and standing up. “remember it’s called the ink and paint club. it’s just-”

“psycho know where it is” psycho said irritating her. “psycho see jennifer there, bye bye jennifer” he said hanging up the phone as jennifer said goodbye

he quickly picked up somethings while moving around like he was on fire and was turning to put himself out. greasy watched him run around the office grabbing whatever he thought was essential. which was mainly his switchblade, a bit of money since smarty kept telling him to bring it if he went anywhere, and of course a lot of his firecrackers.

greasy swore he would burn down toon town with those one day, which wouldn’t exactly be a bad thing. “going ta see your doll psycho?” he said with a smile

“yes! psycho help her get a roll” he said running out the door of office. leaving greasy confused, he sat in his chair thinking on what psycho just said

“helping her get a roll? what on earth does that mean” he said standing up from his seat. he didn’t hear psycho close the door on his way out so he went to go close it. sure enough the door was wide open. he walked towards it and pushed it closed. “i’ll ask em when he gets back” he said walking back to his desk

——

the theater was a good few Miles away from jennifer's Studio apartment which wasn’t in a bad neighborhood but it was definitely mostly used by people who were low on money, if she jogged she would be there in about 7 minutes maybe.

she might also be a bit sweaty. but psycho was probably waiting for her over there. she knew how fast toons could run, she once saw one out run past her dad’s car. and from what she seemed from psycho he could out run a train

sure enough once she got there, a bit out of breath and a bit sweaty, she saw the little brown weasel sitting down by the entrance cranking the lever of a jack in a box giggling psychotically as the jack popped out of his box. she walked over seeing some people took a look at him for second before they just chalked it off on him being a toon and left him alone

“psycho! who you waiting for?” Jennifer called out. psycho immediately looked up from the jack in a box. he got up and ran over to jennifer a short trial of cartoony smoke behind him

he much have noticed her nervousness as he offered her a firecracker to pop the second he was in front of her. “no thanks psycho, i need to Focus on this, not go pop one of those after the other” jennifer said forcing herself to walk forward though her legs were convincing themselves they were made of jelly as she walked into the theater with psycho following her in

the theater was clean but wasn’t in pristine condition. the floors and walls had their fair share of Dust on them that the owner tried to hide with some over decorated red and yellow wallpaper. she guessed the janitor wasn’t working today, or they didn’t have one, which by the amount they were paying their actresses and the amount of people that came here, that mush have been the case

they walked in The auditorium and sat down in some warned out seats. Jennifer stole a glance at the other woman who were also trying out and immediately regretted it. they all looked so much better then her, The butterflies that were in her stomach turned into bees, and began swarming in her stomach like they were about to burst out

one by one all of the other women went on the State giving their own performances. to which the Producer only gave them all a unimpressed frown. he looked like he’s been in this Business, like he knew exactly what to look for in a people to pick the best for the part and that he was mad his own career wasn’t getting off the ground. something she could understand

psycho laughed as one of the women fell on her back, attempting to do a flip. her cheeks turned red and she glared at psycho who only gave her a smile, showing her his shark teeth. the women’s glare immediately fell off her face and went pale and ran off the stage

“hahaha” psycho laughed loudly. everyone, including the producer looked at them. Jennifer shook psycho’s shoulder nervously

“um psycho please don’t laugh so loud” she said a bit embarrassed. psycho's laughing slowly died down into quiet giggles. most of them had looked away before it did though and the ones that were still looking eventually looked back to the stage

“Jennifer foray! your next!” the producer shouted sounding frustrated and unimpressed

Jennifer nervously forced herself out of her seat and walked over to the stage, trying her best to not let her nervousness show on her face

once she was on the stage she moved to the middle of it right in front of the producer. “hello i’m jennifer foray. i’m auditioning for the roll of Daisy” she said. psycho began clapping like she just gave the best performance ever done

“um thank you psycho” she said taking a deep breath and preying to god that she wouldn’t sound like an idiot. she opened her mouth “wait! i know you” the lady next the Director said pointing her pan towards her. she had a cavity inducing smile that would only be given to a childhood friend. “you gave me money for the bus a few weeks ago” she said and it was then Jennifer recognized the blond lady. she had given her the last of her cast for the week, she went without paying for food for that week. but at least she helped somebody. “how did you get home anyway?” “oh i uh walked” jennifer said embarrassed that she had to be admitting this the lady’s smile went away for a second. “in the rain?” she asked “yes. uh i’m just gonna get on with my audition” jennifer said the lady nodded and looking back to her clipboard while the Director sighed like he was thinking finally, she cleared her throat “you know joe people talk about how great joy can be, and what great things people with it can do, but they don’t talk about is the people without it. and what they and i, would do just to get it just fir the smallest of seconds, and to having that joy running through us for just a second, would make everything we did for it worth it!” she said in a calm voice since she felt that would be better for the scene, then her screaming it like the script told her to

Jennifer finished her scene and waited. she closed the script the director’s assistant gave her before she was on stage. psycho started clapping again occasionally stopping to gave a whistle the assistant joining in. she gave them a thankful smile glad it wasn’t just quiet, and waited for the director to say something. though she knew she wasn’t getting the part, there much have been 20 or so girls here. and because she helped that lady doesn’t she’ll get it

“thank you mrs foray, we’ll keep you in deep consideration” he said simply

“um thank you sir” Jennifer said not knowing what else to say. she made her way off the stage noticing the lady whispering something in his ear and his eyes growing into the size of baseballs, she nearly fell over on one of the steps so she turned her head away from them before she made herself look more like an idiot and went back to her and psycho’s seats. her eyes were down casted as she walked. ‘we’ll keep in considering’ so far every audition she had ended with them saying that. and every time they ended up picking someone else. and she had no doubt this one would be the same

a red flower was suddenly shoved into her face basically forcing her to smell it, it smell nice. “psycho thought you were amazing!” psycho said as he gave her the flower

Jennifer's frowned, curled into a small smile as she looked down at psycho's flower and them at him. “thanks psycho. but i think you were the only one who liked it” she said looking at the other woman on stage for a second. “i…think i’m gonna go get some lunch, wanna come?” she asked. psycho nodded hopping out of his seat and followed her out of the theater

Chapter 7: friends nice diner

Summary:

psycho and jennifer get something to eat and talk a bit before they have to go back to the theater, while the radio plays the news jennifer can’t get her head out of the clouds of her, other kind of work behind the scenes

Chapter Text

the dinner was a small place psycho went to before, it was when he didn’t know smarty so psycho waited behind for food from humans, humans were nice and fun, always playing a joke on psycho by screaming and running away from him, but he never went to the theater next to it until now

“psycho like here a lot” psycho told jennifer who said their food was the best, greasy liked to tell psycho a lot that a weasel should always hold a door open for a lady friend of his, so psycho rushed over to the door beating jennifer's already reaching hand to it

jennifer was stunned in place for a second taking a look to psycho who kept his glad to her, he really was fast, maybe if he understood what was happening around, he could help them

“sorry for making you hold the door for so long” she said walking through the door and she nearly jumped put of her shoes when she saw psycho already beat her to a table, ‘if toons could kill, we could get rid of that shoulda been killed monster’ she thought as she sat down

psycho patted the booth seat next to him like greasy taught him to do with friends but jennifer instead took the one in front of him giving him an awkward kinda sorry look

the dinner's colors were calm but also showed a of the messes they didn’t put elbow grease into, the light blue everywhere was fading and the white was a mistake began with, you could tell what food they severed just by looking at the stains on the tiles

the waitress got off her paper with a sighed they heard and came over to their table, she threw the menus down and took her notepad out like it was as heavy as a brick “what can we start you with” she asked

“just a coffee black for me, bring sugar with it to” jennifer said she didn’t look at the menu, she wasn’t hungry enough to eat and a pick me up was all she really wanted right now, was bringing her job up with psycho, a toon who seemed to be made without any screws in him really a good idea

psycho looked through the menu, ohh, all the food they have were on pictures on the menu, psycho already knows how tasty their food was but psycho couldn’t find the pictures for the drinks,

the lady asked what was wrong with him or if he just wanted her to stand there, “where are drink pictures?” he asked the waitress his rings moving normal

the waitress looked at Jennifer telling her to do the waitress's job for her! “psycho they have” she listed out the drinks for psycho, she told the sodas as psycho stood still in his seat

coke and dr pepper sounded boring and one of them had a scary word in it, wheat beer, stupid really liked to get that smarty told psycho not to tell stupid wheat beer wasn’t the special drinks they all but psycho liked

jennifer stopped telling psycho the drinks, since they weren’t anymore on the list for her to say, “so! what is the weasel having” their waitress said psycho turned his head to her and she sighed deeply “look maybe i’m going to start this lady’s coffee think about it whole i’m gone” she said walking away and slapping the coffee maker to life

jennifer saw do that “do you think her high horse makes walking hard” she said before turning back to psycho

“yes! lady thinks of her too much” psycho said he heard smarty say that a lot to mean acting humans, and told psycho what it meant

the waitress turned the radio on, the news started playing catching jennifer's eyes while the bells on the doors of the dinner got psycho's

a man and his two kids came into piling them in while they said the place smelled weird, “daddy! we don’t wanna eat” his daughter told him, jennifer would’ve taken home food too if she had food there

she didn’t toons really liked kids just that they liked their fans with all the shows of them running away or getting the stars beat out of them from the kids, psycho was a lot different though the second he noticed there were looked he stood on his seat

his hands on the table he looked at them like a kid asking to play with a puppy before he jumped down jennifer could stop him he crawled fast over to them and stood up when he was in front of them

“psycho” he said to them even the dad seemed to get scared from him

“ahh” the girl said going behind her dad’s leg, making psycho frown for a second, psycho loved kids they were the funniest humans there were and psycho was too much like smarty said, but they never really liked psycho

nobody was around besides the nice little family but jennfier still didn’t like the scene happening with the dinner's booths watching it, “psycho” she said moving behind the toon who turned his head to her

“wow he’s really cool” the little boy said stopping jennifer she thought he’ll be more like his sister, he took one step closer to pscyo who was jumping a kid wasn’t scared of him! before his dad shut it down by pushing him back and behind him and rushing out

he told psycho to keep away or he’ll get into trouble with him, and jennifer pulled psycho back by his shoulder as the family ran for the hills

“dad i wanted to get a really big milkshake” the boy said on his dad’s way out

psycho waved bye to them before running to the waitress who coming over to them already, “psycho made up psycho's mind now!” he told her and after she got her breath back she said his mind was probably the messiest thing here, “psycho want milkshake” he said thinking what she said was funny but smarty said not to laugh

jennifer went back to the booth her hands on the table and eyes on the still playing radio, the host kept using every word the book to hid his real message, “bring your kids far away to stop a mad man, who knows if they’ll come home but at least your president and general aren’t getting hurt” she’ll spit in his eye if she caught that host somewhere

psycho came back to the booth hopping with a smile to jennife, “psycho getting milkshake with all flavors” psycho appeared jennife took her head away from the radio to psycho, he liked kids

he didn’t react much to the news on the radio besides a quick look, did psycho even know about the war, how about how it started, she looked for the waitress seeing she was working on a crossword

“psycho um” she whispered turning to psycho who seemed to give his full attention leaning his head a bit forward, “do, did you hear what’s been happening around the world right now” she asked

“big elephants in grassy place” psycho asked he went there after greasy said psycho would get a fire pop if he did it in that second, psycho got two fire pops thanks to smarty

wow he was faster then she thought, “no, psycho,” she said “i mean the war”

psycho head turned with a confused hmm, smarty use that word sometimes when he talked about toon town when they first met mr judgey, but smarty never said what it means, “smarty said war but psycho don’t know that word”

“war is when people just start killing each other” jennifer sighed rushing this badly, she checked the waitress was still away, “psycho it’s when people from around the world just start killing each other, until there's nobody left” she told him psycbo leaned his head closer

humans liked hurting each other? were there different humans, psycho seen a lot of humans here but psycho never humans could hate each other like smarty hated toons

psycho frowned eyes turning bluer, “humans kill humans a lot?” psycho asked

Jennifer frowned putting her hand on her cheek “yeah, it’s been happening a lot more often, some crazy guy gets an idea and gets everyone around to blame everyone he blames” she said, psycho didn’t even understand war, was she bringing a baby into it

“psycho hate things but not humans! humans are good” psycho said standing on his seat, just then a milkshake was thrown onto the table along with a muddy looking coffee

“there you both go, now” the waitress took her notepad and pen out “what else are you getting and are you two together?”

jennifer moved her hand off her cheek over hearing the radio playing a list of names that were part of the dead now, “no, i’ll, just have my coffee” she told the waitress, her stomach was filled already after that list

“psycho getting waffles” psycho said holding the picture of the food he wanted up to the lady who pushed it back

“i’ll get that out” she said walking away with an annoyed snare, that weasel cheering and getting her a headache

psycho drank his milkshake, and his feet kicked back and forth, the dinner's waffles were psycho's favorite and he always got so much of it when humans dropped it for him!

jennifer kept an ear the radio, going against her hammered in table manners when she forgot psycho was sitting in front of her, she actually almost brought a toon with a 4 year old brain into her work, he couldn’t keep a secret or even last a second in jail, maybe recruiting should stay open for people only

she jumped when a shark teeth sharp nail touched her leg, her face went a bit red “psycho, we’re here as friends, nothing else” she told him pulling her legs back while psycho turned his head and blinked, “you never play footsie with your friends that’s not for friends” she told him off when psycho stopped her

“what footsie game? is psycho winning?” psycho said looking down and kicking his legs again faster, this time jennifer nearly threw her hands up to hid her face when she felt another nail hit her leg, after that scene she’ll just keep her mouth shut

the waitress came by patting the plate with a few stacks of warm waffles on the table, “there, enjoy it while we’re open fella,” she said walking away

“ohh” psycho said smelling up the stream coming off of the food, it lifted him off his seat for a second before he fell back down, psycho never had food here that was warm, psycho took his switchblade out and slashed them into pieces before putting it back in his straight jacket

he saw jennifer was done with her funny water listening to the man talking on the radio, psycho used the weird thing smarty said was a fork and offered a piece of the food to her, “jennifer want some?” he asked her

jennifer turned away from the radio smiling embarrassed, “no psycho i already ate my fill today” she lied through her teeth, they didn’t pay besides a saved stranger being out there after a day

psycho nodded eating away at his food, smarty would like food here if smarty came, psycho should bring some to everyone back at office, he stopped moving all together at his next thought

“jennifer should meet psycho's friends” he told her out of nowhere

it spooked her for a second but a second later she talked “ah, sure meeting your pals would be great” she said “but maybe we should wait a little bit longer psycho, i don’t think a few toon fellas like you all would want a human girl ruining your nights” she said

“psycho’s friends will like jennifer their nice, greasy really will” psycho said greasy liked saying lady’s was what they really needed every night

“oh no maybe it’s better if they met me after the show” jennifer said she meant longer then that, but psycho jumped in place at that and she couldn’t take it in time

“psycho know! psycho's friends come to show with psycho” psycho told wrapping his arms around himself and sitting back down “psycho friends really like shows to”

“i uh, ok that’s a great idea” jennifer said if she didn’t act like she liked the idea he’ll see right through everything she was putting up, “but uh maybe tell me about them i hate to have nothing to say to them”

psycho nodded fast before he went to telling jennifer everything, everything about them all, she could barely keep up besides leaning their names she couldn’t understand anything else he said

it was starting to give her headaches until the witnesses spoke up “would you keep that down! and finish your food weasel or i’ll throw you out” she yelled at psycho

psycho stopped talking humming interested at the waitress, he was so still for a second the waitress thought she should take her gun out at him for it “you better quit staring at me you!” she yelled at him

before it out of hand jennifer spoke up grabbing his hand, which got the toon to turn away from the waitress and stared straight at her hand on top of his, what does this mean,

“psycho, she’s right we don’t have all day for the audition” she told him with a smile

psycho hummed at her taking his hand back simply confused, psycho had a question for greasy now, he sat back down eating up his food and drink quick so jennifer could go get to play the show

the waitress took the check over to them waiting by them for her money, jennifer through her wallet, only a penny was in there, she went pale, she had to ask psycho to pay for her coffee, she should have just watch him eat

“hehe” psycho said as he put some paper smarty gave psycho on the table and the lady waitress dropped her jaw, psycho hoped 20 was enough for food “psycho 20 papers” psycho said getting out the booth “psycho and jennifer had to go now”

jennifer tried telling him he overpaid but psycho already went to the door was holding it open for her, the waitress already grabbed the crash saying his money means he can do what he wants with it

“psycho you need to get your chains” jennifer told him standing out of the door he was holding,

“smarty liked chains but psycho not allowed to have one, smarty said psycho would eat it” psycho told her, psycho thought smarty’s chain was really pretty though

“no psycho chains because you overpaid her” jennifer told him behind her the waitress told them sorry but it’s late for that and she wasn’t opening the cashier again,

jennifer frowned looking behind her for a second “jennifer coming psycho and jennifer has to leave” psycho said and she walked through the door

“thank you psycho who taught you to he a gentleman” she said

“greasy show psycho how” psycho said following her being a gentleman was really nice

Chapter 8: rehearsals on Monday

Chapter Text

jennifer was standing in the middle of a long line of woman. all the men who were trying out had already been picked and now it was the lady’s turn. the Director was pacing in front of the line of women a clipboard in hand

“hmm” he said looking at his options and trying to remember all of their performances

jennifer sighed. unlike the others she wasn’t that nervous anymore. she could feel the butterflies in her stomach sure, but besides that she wasn’t nervous. she had been through this enough times to know not to get your hopes up and to just expect you didn’t get it

psycho was sitting in a seat in front of the row at the edge of his seat. whenever she looked he gave her a supportive yellow tooth smile and two thumbs up that were covered by the sleeves of his straight jacket

“now for the roll of sally. will go to mrs Sarah” he said. a woman with hair as yellow as a sunflower in a light green Modest dress with long green sleeves and a lighter green belt around her waist stepped up. she exactly approached the Director and accepted the script from the Director who gave her the script and to come back on Monday

“and as for the lead roll of Daisy” the director said. all of the other activities tensed up a bit. everyone except jennife who was just waiting for someone else to get the roll. she didn’t want the waitress job but she needed to eat. the director slowly walked down the line eyes on his clipboard. “hmm…you!” he pointed at someone “say this line for me please”

“hmm. oh are you talking to me?” jennife said feeling a bit stupid for asking that when it was obvious he was. but this was the first time the director spoke to her directly, they usually just spoke to the gang she was in

the director rolled like he said obviously and handed her the script. jennife looked at the script and cleared her throat. putting on a flirtatious voice since the scene seemed to call for it. “well hello pretty eyes~ what can a girl do to have your eyes all to herself for tonight” she said

“hmm. ok. now say this” the director said sounding like he was considering her but jennifer just chalked it up as her mind's wishful thinking. he turned the Page of the script and pointed at the line he wanted her to say next

Jennifer looked at the line and put on her best evil smirk which was probably awful. “what? don’t tell me your surprised pretty eyes~” she said putting on a cruel but flirty voice. like she was laughing at a man who thought she loved him. “a man that has work like you do just has to have made some enemies~ hey i got a game for us to play. it’s a guessing game, how long do you think you would have you been under my little spell if i hadn’t told you” she said at the end of her little speech she giggled

she felt some of the envious looks the other lady’s were giving her but ignored them. “hmm” the director brought his hand to his chin as he pondered…”rehearsals are on monday at 1:00 pm. please practice all of your lines” he said as he walked off to assign other rolls in his movie

jennifer watched him as he walked off. once he started talking to someone else jennifer turned to psycho her mouth hanging open stupidly in amazement. psycho gave what she supposed was a kind of ‘i told you so’ smile that showed his yellow Sharp teeth and started clapping loudly like she had just given the best performance known to man

jennifer felt as if she was walking on air as she made her way off the stage, she even jumped down the last step. she remembered a time when she always walked like this all the time while she was here before all the failed auditions.

she walked to psycho who was standing on his seat with a Bouquet of flowers in his hands which she had no idea where he got them from but accepted them anyway. psycho also gave her ‘i knew you could do it’ smile with a bit more of the ‘i told you so’ look added to it

jennifer took the flowers in one hand and gave psycho a thankful smile. “thanks psycho” she said

“psycho knew you could be actress” psycho said hopping off of the chair to the carpeted ground. “what we do now?” he asked

“well i don’t want to mess this up before i start so. think you can help me with my lines. i don’t want to go on stage and forget everything i’m supposed to say” jennifer said feeling like she was going to mess this up somehow

“psycho can do that” psycho said. he wasn’t the best reader. that’s why smarty said psycho was more the ‘scare em and shut em up’ type of weasel. but he agreed to help him lean how to read anyway. and smarty said he was making a lot of progress

“oh that’s great! thank you” jennifer said as they walked out of the theater. psycho ran forward and opened the front doors of the theater for her. “thanks psycho” she said as she walked through the doors.

psycho walked along side her humming an odd toon no one but him could understand since he made it up years ago. “oh short!” jennifer said stopping in her tracks and snapping psycho out of his daze

“hummed” he hummed questioningly turning to jennifer who was patting herself down with one hand the flowers she was holding in the other. she was doing it quickly like she was on fire without the frantic screaming. “what’s wrong with jennifer?” psycho asked his high pitched voice a bit higher from the worry

jennifer was about to ask what he meant by that before she figured out he meant what was wrong. “i forgot something in the theater” she sighed “i’ll be back in a second psycho” jennifer said. psycho nodded and watched her run off to theater. once she was out of sight he turned to the street behind him

nothing much was happening. a few colorful and shiny cars drove by but other then that nothing else happened. psycho turned his head to the doors of theater hoping to see jennifer walk out of them, but she didn’t. he turned his head back to the road and sat down on the ground beginning to Count what cars drove past

“one, two, three, four, five,” psycho counted. psycho still had to lean somethings about reading but he was good at counting. especially if the things he was counting were shiny. “six, seven! hmm” psycho hummed as the seventh car he counted looked kinda familiar. he let his eyes follow the car, the car parked in front of some bar and psycho gassed as he spotted the detective man in a large coat. just as psycho was about to go back to courting cars, a part of a rabbit's white ears popped out of the detective man coat

“the rabbit!” psycho yelped. he shot up to his feet and ran, a trail of smoke chasing behind as he ran to toon town. he had to tell smarty and the rest that he found the rabbit. “kill the rabbit kill the rabbit” psycho said as he ran forgetting something

“oh there it is” jennifer said trying to keep her voice down to spare herself of the embarrassment. picking her script up from the ground, she felt like an idiot for forgetting the most important thing she needed to do this job right. she didn’t even have it for an hour and she already forgot it. she sighed and walked through the doors. “sorry i took so long psycho!” she called out reading her script a bit

“so do you wanna-“ jennifer had looked up from her script noticing that psycho was nowhere in sight. she huffed her arms falling to her sides. “guess he had to leave” jennifer said beginning the walk back to her home. “would’ve been nice if he told me first though” she murmured to herself “wish i had a vase for these” she said to the flowers in her hand

maybe she could make one with some of the junk she had in her home

Chapter 9: found the rabbit!

Chapter Text

“wanna head to the human world? i hear there’s a lot to do there” a cartoon rooster with a green tail and mostly brown feathers said to his friend who was a cartoon dog with white fur and black spots along his body

“maybe tomorrow i got to-“

psycho ran past the two toons sending both of them spinning around like Little twisters. psycho must’ve done that to at least a dozen toons that he ran past. a lot of toons were fast, but psycho was always faster then the average toon.

——

“ahh greasy, where’d you say psycho was?” stupid asked greasy for what must have been the millionth time

greasy hands were trembling uncontrollably around the papers he was working on, a silent growl escaping out of the corner of his lips. as he glared at the wall in front of him like it was asking him stupid questions like stupid already was. “stupid! for the billionth time! he went out with his doll!” he said.

“ohhhhh. is his girl pretty greasy?” stupid asked putting his finger on his tongue like someone would put their finger on their chin

greasy's claws were leaving small holes in his papers and a veil had appeared on his forehead. his his normal pristine slick back hair now having on hair out of place. “we never met! her! stupid! she’s probably not even real!” he said a second away from cutting stupid's tongue out

“ohh ok greasy by bye” stupid said walking off to his desk and sat down in his chair his tongue hanging out his mouth as he stared at nothing ahead of him

“finally” greasy sighed feeling the veil in his forehead go back in his head. just as he was about to get back to work he spotted stupid get out of his seat and start walking over to him. “son of a!” greasy growled. one of his hands reaching for his switchblade

“ahh um greasy, where’d you say psycho was again?” stupid asked

greasy stood up from his desk and pulled out his switchblade. he grabbed stupid by his too small shirt collar, shoving his switchblade on his nose. he glared at stupid. “for the billion time stupid! he’s-“ greasy was irritated by a loud boom coming from where their front door was

psycho ran into the room. the door behind him probably in shambles. (again). all of the eyes in the office were on him. even greasy's and stupid though he didn’t let go of his collar. not unless this was importance. psycho calmly walked to the middle of the room. he saw wheezy leaning against a wall next to a open window behind his desk so the smoke from his many cigarettes wouldn’t stink up the place

psycho had a calm smile on his face. but he got to the middle of the room, the calm smile he had became crazily excited like it often was. “psycho found the rabbit! rabbit at ink and paint club!” he cheered giggling and hugging himself like it was a surprise

“psycho what we talk bout you breakin’ ours doors, why ya talkin’ bout that ink and paint club” smarty said walking out of his office to psycho who jumping with joy while hugging himself

“he says he knows where that rabbit is boss” greasy said

“that true psycho” smarty asked psycho putting a hand on his shoulder to stop him from jumping so he wouldn’t worn out the floor boards

psycho nodded some of his saliva hitting smarty's suit and a bit on his face. smarty garnered taking out a handkerchief and using it to wipe off psycho’s spit from his face and suit. “psycho! what we take about sayin' it not sprayin' it” he said with a bit of discussed from the drops of spit on his suit

“psycho sorry for spraying” psycho said. “psycho found the rabbit! rabbit with detective man at the ink and paint club”

“yeah i figured that psycho, come on boys! we got nother rabbit ta dip!” smarty said waving for psycho and the others to follow him. greasy let go of stupid's shirt and put his switchblade back in his pocket and followed smarty outside stupid following as well. wheezy enjoyed one last drag from his cigarettes and threw them out the window

“psycho wants shotgun!” psycho said as he ran past everyone and jumped in the middle of the front seats besides smarty’s seat. speaking of smarty, he climbed in the driver seat and started the car psycho giggling as everyone else climbed and they finally drove off to get the rabbit!

“alrighty boy’s, first we gotta tall the judge bout this” smarty said as he drove out of toon town. a dark smile forming on his face “then we got a rabbit to dip”

“heheheh!” psycho erupted in excited, with almost frantic giggles. he couldn’t wait to dip that rabbit

———

“i’m gonna lamp em’!” smarty said as they drove towards benny who had the detective man and the rabbit driving him. psycho was jumping in his seat as the car got closer to the toon car

“hehehe get the rabbit!” he cheered. just as their car was about to hit them benny's wheels suddenly lifted up and over the toon portal's car. psycho’s eyes followed cab as it went above them, psycho quickly turned his head around to the back windows of the car while smarty leaned out his window just in time for both of them to watch the cab turned the corner out of sight

“awww!” they heard stupid scared and turned around to see the men on their police motorcycles driving towards them. “awwwwww!” psycho and smarty scared along with everyone else in the car, psycho’s, smarty’s and stupid’s eyes involuntarily grew huge covering the windshield

smarty's foot slammed on the brakes the police men did too but it was too late for them to stop each other from hitting one another

the bikes crushed into the toon portal's car's causing psycho and stupid to spring forward hitting the Dashboard. the grill of the car making the police fly off of their bikes to the hard ground

psycho turned his head around to see the police men knowing that humans weren’t invincible like they were. thankfully they looked fine! but maybe one of them should go and see if they were ok

“hope those guy (cough) aren’t dead” wheezy said coughing a bit as he lit up a couple of cigarettes

psycho looked at wheezy and nodded agreeing with him

smarty growled griping the wheel of the car tighter, his nails digging into its leather leaving claw marks. “come on greasy we need ta get those idiot cops outta the way” he said opening the door of the car and stepping out along with greasy. psycho leaned out of smarty’s windows to watch them walk up to the officers

“hey! ya mooks! move! we gotta leave so we can get that rabbit and we can’t do that with ya blockin’ us” smarty yelled at the officers who were still on the ground. the officers staggered up and walked back to their bikes all while grumbling and rubbing their aching limbs

psycho watched them walk past the car and waved hi to them out the window. they didn’t notice him though. “come on greasy! we have ta get to the office, judge said if we didn’t get the rabbit to head back to toon town” he said walking back to the car

he was greeted with psycho’s high pitched laughing as he saw one of the officers slipping on some junk causing him to fell to the ground like an idiot, smarty climbed in the car and gave psycho a slapped on his spiky haired head. “stop that laughin’ psycho! it’s like ya want ta die” he barked at psycho though he was sure it was going through one ear and out the other. psycho just rubbed his head with his hand with his usually crazy smile

“psycho sorry, psycho won’t laugh, ” he said. but smarty had heard that from him before

“geez boss, why don’t ya hit the nut job harder” greasy said as he got in his seat

smarty just rolled his eyes and started driving down the road. “alright boys keeps your eyes peeled for that rabbit and that Wise guy eddie” he said as he drove down the street

Chapter 10: what did psycho forget

Chapter Text

smarty parked the car in the alleyway besides their office and climbed out soon followed by the rest of the toon patrol

stupid got out of the car, and immediately falling on his face once he was out the door, he wished he had his mouth closed, maybe then he wouldn’t have the awful taste of the ground on his tongue. he rolled over on his back hearing some laughter from greasy and smarty

he got up and grabbed the door ready to slam the door shut. but then he spotted psycho was still in his seat staring at his feet. he looked like he was thinking about something

“ummm psycho” stupid said. psycho hummed and turned his head to stupid, the yellow and blue lines in his eyes slowly down a bit as he waited for stupid to say something. “don’t you want to come out the car” he asked

“psycho think psycho forgot something” he said turning his head back to his feet trying to think of what he forgot. he knew it was important but he just couldn’t remember what was it

“hey stupid! why are ya still out here?” greasy asked walking out of the office wanting to know why psycho and stupid were still outside. he hoped for their own sake stupid didn’t steal wheezy's smokes again. that guy really had a temper, especially when it came to his cigarettes. “ya better not be smoking wheezy's cigarettes again, i won’t keep it a secret a second time” he said walking up to stupid before seeing psycho still in the car

“eh what are ya doin’ in there psycho. you forget somethin’ in there?” greasy asked to which psycho nodded

“psycho forget something. but not remember what” psycho said hopping greasy would help him remember what it was

“oh ya did” greasy said. “what was it? some kinda toy or somethi’ like that? don’t tell me it was your switchblade” he said earning a sort of insulted look from psycho. in a quick Motion psycho took out his switchblade the Silver blade reflecting some of the light in the car

“um i don’t think psycho forgot it” stupid said greasy having to give him a eye roll for that

“ok that’s not what ya forgot” greasy said. psycho growled like he wanted him to say something else. “ahh sorry” he added

psycho smiled and put away his switchblade. “psycho know psycho forget something. wasn’t any of psycho’s toys” he said trying his best to remember

greasy tapped his foot. “eh, maybe it’ll come
to ya later. in the meanwhile, the judge might have another job for us. might just be another toon ta dip! eh?” greasy said in a tempting way with a raised eyebrow

“ohhh!” psycho exclaimed the lines in his eyes quickened as he hopped out of the car faster then greasy or stupid could see

“ahh greasy where psycho go” stupid asked looking around

greasy took a quick deep breath and sighed almost slamming the door. “don’t know stupid! hope he’s inside” greasy said turning around intending to walk back to the office but almost immediately stopping dead in his tracks.

right in front of both of them just a few feet away from the door hugging himself while Tapping his foot quickly was psycho

“ohh found him” stupid exclaimed pointing a figure at psycho

“yeah so did i” greasy said strolling over to psycho and lightly pushing his shoulder so that he’ll move. “so psycho how was your girl?” greasy asked psycho. but he didn’t get a response. “eh psycho, what ya don’t want to kiss and tell or somethin'” he asked turning his head around to psycho who wasn’t moving

psycho had stopped in his tracks and the pupils in his eyes turning small little dots the size of butterflies. the lines in his eyes stopping all together

“ahh somethin’ wrong psycho” greasy asked. nobody really understood psycho, but he was sure no one in the gang saw him like this. “psycho! ya in there!” he said reaching out to shake him out of whatever he was in

before his hand could teach him psycho rocketed past him and stupid through the door of the office

stupid and greasy blinked. “um greasy. where’d psycho go?

“just shut up and get inside stupid” greasy said walking in the toon portal's office. dragging stupid along with him as the fater weasel asked questions that he had to Force himself not to listen to

psycho jumped in his chair and quickly dialed in jennifer's number

ring! ring! ring!

“psycho are ya calling that girl of yours?” greasy asked heading over to his own desk and leaning back in his seat

ring ring!

psycho nodded “psycho calling jenn-“

“hello” he heard jennifer's voice from the phone. she sounded like she was focused on something

“hello jennifer!” psycho said into the phone

“hello psycho” jennifer said flipping the page of the script. “you know it would’ve been nice if you said goodbye before you disappeared like magician, which by the way ends in more fire then you think” she said like it was a joke

“psycho sorry. psycho didn’t want to disappear without Jennifer” psycho said spinning his seat a bit

jennifer smiled “it’s find psycho” she said not really caring about it. she looked at the flowers he gave her. she didn’t have a vase so she did the next best thing, well in her opinion. she cut the stems of the flowers so they were short enough to fit inside an old and kinda broken coffee pot with, then all she did was put some water in it and place it on her counter top

wheezy, stupid, and greasy watched psycho on the phone as he talked to his mystery girl. unlike wheezy and stupid, who were watching so they could see what happened, greasy was watching with admiration. “gotta give it to psycho. i thought he would be the last one of us to get himself a girl” he said excluding himself from that of course

wheezy shrugged in a kinda agreeing way. he never thought psycho would get a girl. not with all the (mostly) false rumors going around about weasels…and with him being crazy. “guess he met (cough) a crazy one” wheezy said

“or she’s not real” greasy pointed out

their little Conversation ended abruptly after they heard psycho practically slamming the handset back in its dialer. they expected to see him unset or mad since he slammed the handset down. but to their surprises he kinda bounced in his chair with one of his toys. his eyes glowing a bit

“looks like he and his doll gettin’ along” greasy said impressed

“ahh who’s getting along with who greasy?” stupid asked making wheezy sigh out a wave of smoke

“psycho and his (cough) mystery doll” wheezy said putting out one of the three cigarettes he had in his mouth in an ashtray and immediately lighting up a new one

“ahhh…wait psycho plays with dolls” stupid said begging to laugh like an idiot. wheezy just glared at stupid as he laughed. he wasn’t going to be the one to collect him on that, he already knew it’ll just make him ask more questions

psycho ear twisted as it easily picked up on stupid loud laughter. “hummed” he said hopping off of his chair and onto the wooden floor. he walked over to the other weasels taking a paddle ball toy he had with him

“stupid psycho doesn’t play with dolls” greasy said clearly sounding frustrated with the stupid weasel. “at least i hope no—“

“psycho doesn’t like dolls” psycho said. walking up to the weasels hitting the small red ball attached the paddle again and again. they seemed a bit embarrassed for some reason. “psycho likes toy, but not dolls” he added. he noticed stupid's pupils were following the ball as it bounced off of the paddle and started hitting the ball faster and faster watching as stupid's pupils followed it like they were tennis balls getting hit back and forth

“ah psycho that’s not the kind of doll we were talkin’ bout” greasy said shaking his head after his own eyes started following the paddle ball psycho was playing with

psycho stopped playing with the paddle ball. causing stupid to fall backwards to the floor with his feet up. psycho turned to greasy. “we were talkin' 'bout that mystery girl ya went ta see today. how it go by the way?” greasy said putting his elbow on the mahogany wood of his desk

psycho blinked and started playing with the paddle ball again, this time bouncing it in the air. “psycho and jennifer have lots of fun!” psycho said

greasy chuckled at psycho's answer. no matter how much years he spent talking to the little nut job he never cease to surprise him with whatever came out of his mouth. “well color me impressed” he said to wheezy who turned to him and blew out a small cloud of smoke in his face making greasy winkle his noes and turn away from him with a cough. he then wordlessly walked away, probably heading outside since had only three cigarettes at a time inside rule

“psycho and jennifer going out again tomorrow” psycho said to greasy beginning to bounce the ball forward the ball barely missing greasy's chest

“heh, happy to hear your getting a girl nut job” greasy said smiling at psycho's confused face. “eh, just a little nickname for you psycho” he said standing up and walking off. he needed to help smarty with something with the judge

greasy walked off with his belly forwards, psycho smiled thinking greasy was silly when he walked like that

psycho heard a groan that sounded painful, it came from stupid who sat up from the floor and shacked his head. “ahh what happened, why’d i passed out again” he asked looking over at greasy who shake his head he rather jump the window

psycho noticed him getting up and started hitting the ball fast and faster again. watching stupid's pupil start following the ball again and immediately fall over again with a thump. psycho laughed at it and turned with a joyful bounce in his step to his desk leaving the overweight weasel on the ground still playing with his paddle ball as he left

he jumped back in his chair and placed the paddle ball on the hard wooden desk replacing it with a little Metal slinky. psycho tossed it to his other hand and giggled. he heard a door open and close

“stupid get off the floor! we got a job” smarty said his arms on his sides looking down at the fatty weasel, the second he saw all the spinning lines on his eyes he grabbed at his head “am i paying ya ta give me a headache“ he said stupid said a braindead kinda yes and he threw a hand for greasy to handle this

he went to do the job only he had and went to get psycho ready, he was playing with a Slinky “psycho” smarty said psycho head shot up to smarty like it always did when he was the one talking “we heading to work” he said

psycho gassed and quickly got out of his seat and ran past greasy who was trying to slamming stupid relentlessly before he had to drag to the car. he ran over to smarty who was about to open the door

“i don’t knew why you ride in the car, when ya could out run to that Japan place in a second” smarty said opening the door and stepping out. psycho stood next to the car pulling on the door handle, “‘top that psycho! ya gonna break the handle!” smarty barked. he noticed wheezy by some boxes near the door and waved him over

psycho stepped back from the car letting smarty unlock it first, when he heard the doors open up psycho jumped and gave smarty a surprise when he opened the door next, psycho made him jump, psycho patted the drivers seat “psycho like car rides better! and with smarty its best” he told smarty who shrugged and sat down at the wheel

”yeah i can’t blame, dringin’ round town a car like this is heaven” smarty said back patting his car door from the window

wheezy opened the window from his seat and threw his dead smokes he had been smoking out of it, getting a evil plan to start somethin’ for a sec, “if (hic) it’s so fun to (cough) why don’t you let (wheez) psycho give it a whirl” he said

psycho gasped smiling at the thought of driving like smarty always did, “ohh” he said and smarty felt goosebumps on his shoulder from psycho's waiting stare

smarty looked to psycho keeping one hand on the wheel “dat ain’t gonna happen psycho,” smarty told him and psycho whined in his ear “what? ya ran through door and walls every time you see them psycho” he looked behind the seats to wheezy “and ya walk back if ya gonna ask questions like dat!” he yelled

wheezy put his hands and leaned back “sorry boss” he coughed at the end, smarty didn’t look away from but he lit up another few cigarettes

“ya lucky i can’t reach back wheezy else those smokes will go up ya snout” smarty told him looking at the office door and honk the horn psycho giggled at the sound stopping when smarty looked at him, and psycho stopped hands up

smarty saw psycho's ears move and got to hear the sound he was hearing, somebody swearing in Spanish. “why’d smarty had to give a job to some fool so fat!” greasy said followed by another wave of curses aimed at stupid came tumbling out the door greasy rushed out afterwards,

he kicked the door to shut, ribbing his coat off and hitting stupid with it, “ha” smarty said and immediately psycho screamed and hit his head into the wheel!

psycho patted his back as smarty yanked his head back and rubbed it “smarty better now?” psycho asked

he cut into the wheel wanting to give psycho a slap for that but it’s not like he was the one laughing, “thanks psycho” he growled and psycho just seem to perk up at that moving back to his side, he heard greasy curse again and shot a look to wheezy “feeling comfy, why don’t you give greasy a hand” he told wheezy who knew better then to do anything but what he said to right now

he went and grabbed stupid's hand and dragged him to the car, they all got in greasy swiping his coat back on saying to punch it now so he could see a doctor after work “my arms are killin' me 'cause of this dummy. “thanks for helping so soon wheezy” he said sarcastically

wheezy shrugged and lit up a couple of smokes. “be mad at psycho too why don’t you” he said opening the car window and blowing out some smoke into the outside air

“psycho ain’t as strong us! so why would i” greasy pointed out fast like a punch to him

“yeah but he’s faster, woulda had in here in a hour” wheezy said enjoying a drag off his smoke

“can psycho have one” psycho said looking into the backseat to wheezy who got confused

“one of what?”

psycho pointed at the smokes in his mouth. “psycho want to try again” he said

wheezy thought about giving psycho another cigarette. he did throw away the last one he gave him like it was trash. plus he was starting to run low on them. “sorry psycho (cough) but i don’t really like Sharin' theses” he said earning a disappointed look from the crazy weasel. that did make him feel just a bit bad about saying no but he wasn’t changing his mind

“don’t be surprised psycho” greasy said from the back seat. beginning to dig into his pockets and pulling out a pack of lucky strikes cigarettes. he took out one for himself and another for psycho. “here. have one of mine” greasy said reaching over to offer the smoke to psycho who took it without a second thought

“thanks greasy!” he said putting the cigarette in his mouth and lighting it up with one of his matches

“anytime nutty” greasy said opening a window and blowing some of the smoke out. “say psycho. since do ya smoke?” he asked remembering psycho wasn’t much of a smoker

“psycho need luck” psycho answered blowing out a smoke ring and smiling at it

“luck? psycho, ya know smocking doesn’t make ya lucky right?” greasy asked a bit confused

“yes it does! psycho meet new friend jennifer after smoking!” psycho said with a small cough with waves of smoke coming out of his mouth as he talked

greasy blinked. he would’ve laughed after hearing that, but smarty was in the car and he didn’t want to get his head chewed off. “psycho the cigarettes didn’t make you meet ya doll”

psycho took the cigarette out of his mouth and exhaled two lines of smoke out of his noes. “psycho got lucky, if psycho smoking not give psycho luck what did?”

wheezy shrugged and blew out a smoke ring out the window. “maybe that luck (cough) came from somethin' else”

psycho seemed to think that over, so wheezy just went back to enjoying his smoke, he closed his eyes for a second of peace

“psycho!” smarty yelled. interrupting wheezy's smoke

the car made a sudden sharp turn almost going onto the sidewalk making the unconscious stupid fell off of the backseats to the floor of the car. they almost hit a young light brown furred bunny who screamed with her mouth open wipe enough that she could swallow the car. but thankfully smarty managed to make another sharp turn back to where they were on the road just in time

wheezy turned to psycho spotting the firecracker in his hand the cigarette greasy had given him in the other, which he had used to light the fuss of the firecracker. psycho had his mouth open with a smile on his face that must have been his version of a mad genius smile

“psycho what are ya doin'!” smarty yelled. he knew the firecrackers weren’t anything too dangerous but with someone like psycho only god knows what he can do with something like those.

“psycho know what give psycho luck” he said watching the fuse exactly as it slowly led to it’s end. “fire pops best thing ever!” psycho announced as the fuse was about to reach its end which would lead to the funniest noise ever to exist.

“psycho threw that before it pops” smarty yelled at psycho. psycho hummed and threw the firecracker in the back of the car where it landed in stupid's wipe open mouth

stupid swallowed the firecracker in a second and went back to his quite snoring. greasy turned his head down while psycho peeked over the seats to watch stupid as he snored away wanting to know what would happen

a loud but severely muffled pop came from inside the weasel's stomach. his stomach almost reached the roof of the car for a second and went back to it’s normal size, black smoke started coming out of his mouth. nevertheless he just continued snoring

“what was that psycho! ya trying to kill ups or somethin'!” smarty yelled as he drove down the road

“psycho need luck from fire pops!” psycho answered innocently like he hadn’t done a thing

smarty sighed. “no such thing as lock psycho” he said turning the car and taking a breath of the human's air. air that wasn’t in its own way loony

then a painful groan came from the backseat at greasy’s feet. greasy leaned back and watched stupid groggily sat and rub his head. “why does my hurt head” he said

“long story stupid” greasy said wanting to forget about it himself, his suit probably had sweat stains now because of him

“hey are ya mooks done messin' around let’s get to Business!” smarty announce getting the attention of everyone in the car

stupid climbed up and sat down. “shot boss man” greasy said once stupid was seated

smarty made a turn. psycho leaned towards him a bit from the turn but thankfully didn’t bump into him. “we got ourselves another job moving some turpentine for the judge, said we got a lot of dip to make” he said a smile finding his lips. he opened the window for a second and adjusting the front mirror of the car. toon town appearing in the mirrors reflection. “toon town days our numbat” he said closing the window and continuing to drive

psycho giggled as the others laughed. ‘go away and stay away toon town’ psycho thought as he giggled

Chapter 11: what’s underneath the tarp

Chapter Text

after a left turn and another minute of driving smarty stopped the car at a paint shop. the owner of which was on the judge's payroll so they didn’t have to worry about calling the cops. “alright greasy your with me rest of you wait outsized” smarty said opening his door and stepping out of the car with greasy following him

“does he say things like that on purpose” wheezy said opening the door and stepping out psycho and stupid following him out. wheezy leaned on the backside of the car beginning to finish off his cigarettes

psycho and stupid went to the large window of the paint shop and peered through the clean glass. they saw smarty and greasy walk up to a old man who was smiling as he handed a beg to a nice lady in a yellow dress who greasy sinked at

psycho waved hi to the lady as she pushed open the door to the shop. instead of waving the lady went a bit pale and quickly walked back to her car. once there she drove off, psycho watched her leave and then went back to looking on the inside of the small shop

smarty walked up the man who gave him a nervous but nice smile. smarty once told psycho that everyone hides their faces behind fake smiles and even bought him to a store so psycho could have some demonstrations of a fake smile. smarty liked teaching psycho smart things like that, it helped him see jennifer was fake smiling when he saw her on that stage

psycho hoped she would stop it and smile! smiling was fun!

“how can i help you fellas” he said. psycho picked up on the little shakiness in his voice

smarty looked around the small shop. psycho guessed smarty was making sure no one else was in there with them. “we’re here to get some toon remover” smarty said and the man immediately understood why he was here

“o-oh i was told the judge would be picking it up” the man said taking his hands off the counter top.

“judge couldn’t make it chief, so we’re gonna pick em up for him” smarty said putting his hands on his sides. he had a feeling this guy isn’t going to make this job too easy

the old man seemed to be a bit afraid of what he was about to say. “sorry fellas but um. i can’t give an owner like that unless the guy who wanted the owner came here and-“ the man stopped talking seemingly freezing in place as he spotted psycho and stupid at the window

“hey! what’s the holdcups!” smarty asked wanting to hear what he was going to say. he kinda found it funny when people got scared by psycho, especially while they were about to say something

“umm. are those fellas friends of your?” he asked pointing at psycho and stupid

smarty hummed thoughtfully. psycho remembered smarty once told him everyone had gears in their heads and that his liked working overtime more then most. and by the thoughtful look he had. the gears much have been working overtime again “yeah they are” he said waving to greasy to step by the door

greasy strolled over to the door. the old taking his eyes off smarty for a second to watch greasy. psycho and stupid rushed over to the door like two dogs trying to claw through the door to get to their owner

“sorry buds but smarty didn’t give the ok yet” greasy said. psycho just stared through the glass while stupid gave a whin

greasy made it look like he was about to let them in. he put one of his hands on the door handle keeping the other in his pocket while giving the old a daring smirk

“and unless ya want them to came in and say hi! ya better got what we’ve come here for” smarty said. nodding towards greasy who opened the door slightly. stupid rushed to the door opened gap but psycho knew better then to put his head through the small opening but stupid didn’t making greasy close the door on his neck

the old man raised his hands that were trembling a bit. beads of swear staring to appearing on his forehead. “o-ok! i’ll get the remover” he said backing up into the back room door. he reached for the door handle to open it. not taking his eyes off of smarty or any of the other weasels

he stepped in the backroom of his paint shop and quickly grabbed the crate he had filled up with turpentine for that old man who wanted it. the old man reminded him of some kind of vulture. if vultures would kill anime’s instead of eating the corpses left by other animals

he picked the decently sized wooden crate with some trouble, his arms weren’t what they used to be. he carried it into the front where smarty and greasy were waiting. he put the crate on his counter. smarty walked up to the counter but stopped just a few feet shy of it. he gave him a glare and raised his nose like he thought he was insulting him

“something wrong sir” the paint shop owner said nervous

“are ya some kinda idiot or are ya just laughin' at me wise guy? ” smarty said. he clenched his sharp teeth furrowing his eyebrows at the panicking man

the man racked his brain as fast as he could. why was the weasel looking at him like he wanted to claw his head off?! oh! the man picked up the crate and ran around the counter and placed (more like dropped). the turpentine at smarty's feet and opened it up with a screwdriver he had in his back pocket

“well that’s more like it” smarty said taking a look at the containers inside. smarty gave a approved whistle at the items. “hey greasy, come take a look at these” he called

greasy kicked stupid’s head out of the door and straighten up his suit a bit. hearing a aww from the weasel as he strolled over to smarty and took a look smiling at the crate. “those oughta leave a mark” he said

psycho passed his eyes against the window wanting to see what was in the box more then anything at that moment. what could it be? greasy seemed to like what was in it. so it much have been boring, but smarty liked it too so maybe it wasn’t

psycho jumped in excitement when he saw greasy pick up the crate and carry it over to the door while smarty was saying something to the man in the shop letting greasy go out first. psycho told stupid to hold the door open for them. which he did with his tongue sticking out of his mouth dumbly

no sooner then greasy was outside psycho jumped on top of his back knocking him to the ground and quickly took a look at whatever was inside the crate

the sudden tackle knocked the wind out of greasy, felling like a football playing just tackled him out of the blue. “psycho get offa me!” he yelled trying to lift his chest off the ground enough so he could suck in some air

psycho didn’t respond seemingly ignoring greasy to instead Focusing on sniffing the containers of turpentine. after a few quick sniffs psycho took one of the containers out and hopped off of greasy. greasy glared at psycho and groaned in pain as his back popped into place

“hahahahahaha!” stupid laughed at greasy letting go of the door and felling to ground. greasy growled at him getting off of the ground and coughing out a bit of dust while dusting himself off

“ya ruined my tie! ya nut job!” greasy yelled at psycho taking his tie and trying to show psycho who was a few feet away by the car the obvious black stain on his pink tie. “ain’t a thing gonna get this out” greasy said after realizing psycho was a bit too infatuated with the container and clearly wasn’t listening to him. he letout a swear in Spanish under his breath as he put his tie back where it went

“hahahaha” stupid continued his laughter to an almost painful sounding laugh. like he was about to laugh himself to death! before he could though. the bell to the paint shop opened violently into his face stoping his laughing fit abruptly

stupid froze for a second before falling backwards into the pavement. his eyes spinning like a wheel before landing on the letters KO!

“for the love of! i told ya ta stop that laughin'!” smarty yelled at unconscious stupid with a huff. he put his hand on his forehead like he was exasperated by stupid. kinda something that happened every week. “hey! stupid get off the ground! i’m not carrying ya to the car!” smarty yelled nudging the side of his fat belly with his heel

stupid sat up slowly and shook his head. “owie my head” stupid groaned pretty dizzy from the blow to his face

stupid blinked noticing a brown figure wearing pink. he looked mad. “um nice to meet you” stupid raised his hand trying to shake the pink figures hand. his head rocking back and forth the deep spyros that were in his eyes before returning

the pink and brown fighter looked at his hand and slapped it away. “knock it of stupid! and get of the ground before we leave ya here” smarty barked down at stupid

he heard a giggle and already knew who it came from. “what’s ya want psycho?” smarty said turning to the smaller weasel

“psycho help greasy with box” psycho said pointing at greasy who was closing the back doors of the car. “psycho play with fire pop now” he added

“sure psycho go ahead. just don’t run off like ya did earlier for that girl ya meet” smarty said

psycho nodded “psycho promise” he said putting a hand to his chest and crossing his heart. smarty waved his hand giving him the ok to leave

psycho walked over to the car noticing greasy leaning on the back of the car and joined him

psycho joyfully leaned on the car next to greasy who looked a bit tired from having to carry the box to the car. his usual slick back hair had a lock of hair on his forehead. “hey nut job, ya better not be here to knock me down again” greasy said threateningly. he wasn’t going to get any other part of his suit dirty

psycho once again crossed his heart. “psycho promise psycho won’t jump on greasy again. psycho got excited, psycho wanted to know what in box” he explain

“alright nut job, it’s find, but ya gonna pay for this” greasy took his tie and showed it to psycho pointing out the dirty spots on it. psycho nodded agreeing to pay for the tie. “good so what ya want?” greasy asked letting bygones be bygones

“psycho wanna play with fire pops, greasy wanna play?” psycho asked holding out a firecracker and a unlit match in his other hand

“no thanks nut job, but ya can do that without me” greasy said. psycho frowned for a second and then smiled lighting the fuse of the firecracker and threw it at the pavement, laughing as it popped

“psycho top that laughin'” smarty barked walking over to them wheezy and a dazed stupid behind him. “come on guys let’s hit the road” smarty said walking over to the drivers seat. psycho quickly hopped in the shotgun seat next to smarty

once everyone was in the car smarty drove off to where the judge wanted them to drop off the crate of turpentine

it was a very big building made out of a lot bricks with a big sign out in front. psycho pushed past stupid and took his seat at the window so he could see what the sign said. he squinted at the sign as smarty drove past it so they could Park somewhere

“ac-me. fact-ory?” psycho said slowly making sure he was reading it right

“it’s the acme factory psycho, ya been here before rememba” smarty said parking the car. the judge told them not to make a habit out of breaking down the door after the last time they broke them down

“alright boys come on, judges waitin' inside” smarty said. they didn’t have to worry about any cops being around here. the judge made sure marvin's little ‘accident’ had been cleaned up. with some pay offs here and the lack of evidence most of the police men didn’t come near it. probably wanting to avoid the toons in toon town. “greasy grab the crate and bring it in” he said once everyone was outside the car

“my arms are killin’ me boss! can’t stupid do that” greasy complain rubbing his forearm where some soreness still was

“find” smarty said looking at wheezy and greasy. “but ya two better trail behind em before he wanders off” smarty said noticing stupid wasn’t by the car. with a growled of annoyance he looked around for the overweight weasel the other weasels starting to look for as well

they spotted him chasing a butterfly a few feet away from them. “stupid get ya butt over ere now!” smarty yelled startling stupid enough to fall on his ass as the butterfly flew off. he gave smarty a dump smile and tried to salute, only to slap himself in the forehead and knock himself to the ground

smarty groaned and shook his head. “ya two got em up and have em get that crate inside. and make sure he don’t wander off with it neither” he said walking over to psycho who had been playing with his switchblade. “come on psycho,” he said. psycho hummed and threw his blade in the air and caught it in his other hand before putting it away lovely

smarty gave him a little impressed smile and headed over to the doors of the factory leaving greasy and wheezy to deal with stupid

when they were near the doors psycho shot forward like a bullet and held it open for smarty. smarty stopped just a few feet shy of the doorway, he gave psycho a weird look. but he walked through the door anyway. “ahh. thanks psycho” smarty said once he was inside the building. he heard the sound of the door closing and psycho's small and quiet footsteps following soon after

“ohhhhhhh!” psycho said. looking at all the boxes in the factory, all filled up with toon after toon gadget. whether it be a singing sword or a mallet that fires a punching glove

“get your head out the clouds psycho” smarty said. walking past psycho and ignoring all of the boxes around them. “we gotta find the judge, he said he’ll be here” he said looking around the factory

psycho ran up past smarty and sniffed the air. judge doom smelled like one of those smelly waters in those funny, or sometimes pretty looking bottles humans like to spray on themselves. psycho arched his back downwards to the floor to see if he could smell it better

“psycho. what are ya doubtin’?” smarty asked. as he looked down at psycho who continued sniffing in hopes to find the judge

“psycho smelling for judge” psycho answered with another sniff now picking up a bit of the funny smelling water and began to move towards it. smarty followed him wordlessly wanting to see where he was going

psycho turned a corner and crawled under some police tape. smarty followed him but didn’t bother to craw under the tape and instead ripped the tape down and crumpled it up into a ball which he tossed it aside not caring where it landed

psycho kept following the pungent and nice smell, until his head hit something made of metal which made him fall backwards to the ground

he look at what he had just walked into. it was big! very big! but it was covered head to toe by a giant tarp, it seemed whatever it was, it was still being built as evidenced by the scatter tools everywhere around it. “ohhh!” psycho explain getting up and walking to it to see what was underneath the tarp that feeding psycho’s insatiable curiosity. just as he grabbed the end of it someone yelled

“step away from that!” someone furious screamed like he was about to commit a murder it boomed at psycho loud enough for it to be heard through the factory. smarty turned his head to the judge, who rushed out of nowhere rushing his cane around like he was to give a hit

“ hey judge” smarty said stopping him before he got to psycho, he turned to him and smarty walked over, “we got that packet ya wanted us do get, it’s outside, stupid’s got it” smarty said. just as stupid turned the corner and walked in view behind him wheezy and greasy stopping him going somewhere else

the judge stepped forward. “step away from that please” he told psycho putting his cane down on the part he was trying to pick up, he head at the judgey

“psycho get over here” smarty told psycho and he rushed over to smarty's side

”psycho still wanna see under blue tarp” psycho told smarty whining but knowing better then to let the judge get a hit on him told him to suck it up and wait till it’s done

judge boom stood in front of the object. stupid asked greasy again who the judge was which made greasy give him a shove to the judge's feet. his chin landing hard on the wooden crate he had carried in

doom shook his head huffing through his nose, with the help of his cane he lowered himself down enough to push stupid off and opened the crate, he smiled at what was inside like smarty said he had gotten what he had payed for truly the only toon he could count on, “good everything here” he said simply. “you can put those over there” he said pointing over to the side of whatever it was under the tarp, which to psycho was just making fun of him because the tarp knows what was under it and he didn’t!

a growl escaped psycho’s lips as he narrowed his eyes at it! then psycho flipped his switchblade open and walked over to the tarp that kept laughing at psycho

“eh judge, what’s ya got under there?” greasy asked as stupid moved the crate for him after all his questions

the judge turned to his greatest invention yet, trial and error made this dreamed up machine and he didn’t want to ruin this surprise for the ones who would use it for its purpose, he gave it a sick smile “this! is whats going to make toon town cease to exist! this machine is a new corner stone for a new world to be built! and one that’ll make a mark a new road for humanity!” he spoke like he was some kind of teacher trying to inspire his class

the weasels all cheered in excitement to toon town’s destruction, but while they were all cheering he noticed the most annoying voice wasn’t part of it all. psycho moved quickly and quietly over tarp about to slash it with his switchblade, but before he could the judge slammed the bottom of his cane on the tarp before psycho could get too close

the judge gave him a deadly look crushing his handle enough his hand was shaking “i understand you are all excited!” he yelled at psycho “and that you want to see what will bring toon town's deception” he began smarty called him back putting him a bit behind everyone so he get the picture to stay there

the weasels eyes all followed him as he began to pace keeping his eyes on them the sound his cane made as it hit the ground echoing around empty factory, if it was to scare him a bit even stupid didn’t care about a thing he was doing

“but. . .unfortunately i have not finished it yet” he turned to the object and waved his cane wildly at it as he walked towards with another sick smile “and i would not want to ruin the surprise! before the surprise was finessed!” he stopped moving looking at the object for a second

“judge, were ya gonna say somethin' else?” smarty asked after that second lasted too long. he noticed psycho was trying to sneak over to whatever it was under that tarp so he grabbed him by his shoulder before he could get too close to it and pulled him back to his side before the judge noticed again

“ahh yes my apologies! i’m afraid i got lost in my thought for a moment” he said turning back to the weasels “the Machine will be ready soon! and once it is all of you shall play a part of toon town's destruction!” he finished waiting for whatever questions the clearly expected and pleased weasels had

the fat one was jumping with his hands waving, smarty gave him the warning so he ignored him and turned to smarty that crazy he wished smarty would just work without stayed behind him chtting the ground with his switchblade, he’ll have to wait, just like he did to see his machine be put together

“can’t wait ta see it ready and running judge” smarty said psycho nodded, “but what do ya want us ta do in the meantime?” he asked. “we aren’t the type ol toon dat do nothin’ so which one of the jobs ya done first?”

“the same thing you’ve been doing so far” he said. “i want you to continue looking for that rabbit and that detective. and once you have them i want you to bring them to me here” he told them, his men around the cities hadn’t see any of them yet, and she was too smart to go back to that town if theirs, so his informant had to break their backs to find her

“ya got it judge! we’ll bring em to ya before they make a run for it” smarty said to him

psycho giggled too much and smarty eyed him to stop which he did, psycho was so excited to see the judgey's machines! and a lot more to find the rabbit!

“good now get out there and find that rabbit and Eddie valiant and especially if you find that rabbit's brid” he said as a goodbye and walked over to the objects starting to pick toons

they made their way out of the factory leaving judge doom to work on his ‘surprise’. smarty had to pull psycho out of the building by his arm so he wouldn’t try to get a look at it again. once they were outside though psycho was gone in the blink of an eye. he just disappeared out of nowhere

“huh! where psycho go” stupid asked making wheezy and greasy notice he was missing too

“he must’ve went in” wheezy said with a count about to head back inside to get him. but smarty stopped

“hold it wheezy” he said walking to the car casually. he opened the door to the driver's seat and sure enough there he was in the car in his usual seat

they drove out of there quick, greasy besides psycho while he sat next to smarty, “didn’t know you could disappear like that nut job, heh maybe that magician job for you wouldn’t be such a joke if you got a job there” greasy said

“psycho really like magic” he said turning to smarty leaning his head to him “psycho like smarty work more” he said

“heh didn’t know smarty was holding you back like that” greasy told psycho

“psycho’s the one that gave me the idea of this gang,” smarty told greasy “so he’s working his dream job already”

“didn’t that boss” greasy said then he put a hand on psycho's back and pulled him a bit closer “still hoping to see another show of your with that doll” he added letting psycho go with a funny smile to him

greasy reminded psycho about his question so he turned to smarty, “smarty, psycho had lots of lots fun today, but psycho really sure psycho had lots of fun with jennifer tomorrow to” greasy he was hopping he would, “can. . .psycho see jennifer tomorrow please”” he asked hopefully putting his hands together

smarty was mostly focused on the road but saw psycho giving him a pleading look he didn’t know he could give. psycho never asked for everything anyway really. most of which was just him asking him for permission for things and he didn’t do that often either unless it involved work. “hmm” he hummed leaving psycho in suspense…something he knew he couldn’t stand

“come on boss” greasy said leaning towards smarty and a bit past psycho. with a toothy half smile. “give em a day with his girl, he’s already workibg for ya everyday more then we do already, so what’s one day huh?” he said

smarty rolled his eyes “yeah fine psycho go ahead, by the way thanks fo tellin’ bout dat greasy” he told him and greasy leaned down at that telling them sorry fellas, “get back to the office by lunchtime and it’s fine alright psych” he told psycho who threw his around nodding

“psycho promises!” psycho said jumping forward and hugging smarty’s shoulder. which pushed him into the car’s door

“psycho let go!” smarty screamed as the car made a sharp turn. thank God! for the car’s breaks, without them they would have crashed into a building

after a second to calm smarty pushed psycho (who was still hugging his shoulder seemingly not noticing the car almost getting into a wreck) off of his shoulder and gave him a warming look. “don’t give me a hug while i’m drivin' the car again or ya can kiss that day with ya dolly goodbye” he scolded and psycho turned his head down as a apology

“ya looky i still letting ya see her tomorra” smarty said backing up the car off of the sidewalk. psycho gassed as he had thought smarty wasn’t letting go anymore. he turned his head up to smarty with a smile somehow more joyful then the last one. he was about to hug smarty again but greasy stopped him by grabbing his shoulder and holding him back

“ya don’t wanna do that psycho” greasy whispered in his ear

psycho wondered why he didn’t want to do it. he felt like he wanted too and smarty deserved it. oh yeah! psycho shook greasy's hand off of his shoulder. “thanks greasy” he said everyone else in the car hearing him since he didn’t whisper

smarty just signed and continue driving back to the annoying town they have to live in. on the bright side soon they won’t have to live there anymore, maybe they’ll find a hotel or something, couldn’t do it before though those pig weren’t idiots, huh that lady psycho’s wants to see tomorrow might let them stay at her's

psycho laughed at that thought ‘like she’ll do that!’

“so psycho what’s ya and that doll gonna do tomorrow anyway eh?” greasy asked knowing well the others wanted to know too

psycho thought for a second trying to remember what him and jennifer were going to do. she said she couldn’t do much for too long but she asked if he would like to go to the park and he said yes. “psycho and jennifer go to park” psycho said

“the park huh? no bad way to spend your time there. especially with a lady around your arm” greasy commented sounding just a bit amuse

psycho nods enthusiastically. “yes psycho likes parks!” he said

“could ya two stop talking for a second i wanna enjoy the quite while it lasts” smarty said as he made a rather sharp turn ending their talk short

“say hi to that girl of yours for me” greasy whispered. before psycho could respond with an answer that was loud enough for everyone in the car to hear greasy covered his mouth and put his finger to his lips. “smarty wanted us to zip it, remember”

“ohhh” psycho said remembering what smarty had just said. he could really forget sometimes in the heat of the moment. he nodded promising greasy he’ll tell jennifer he said hi. he thought they’ll become friends too one day, and maybe she’ll want to be friends with everyone else too one day. the thought of it made the rings in psycho’s eyes move a bit quicker. something that happened whenever he was excited

after a minute of silence psycho decided to break it by saying something very nice.
“psycho can’t wait for friends to meet jennifer. maybe friends can meet tomorrow?” psycho said cheerfully

smarty was a bit taken a back from that. “psycho ya ain’t supposed to introduce us till later” smarty said taking his eyes off the road that was mostly empty anyway to look at psycho who was leaning back and moving his feet side. clearly bored right now but still excited for his (what smarty was assuming) date. “it’s…how it goes”

psycho frowned a little but nodded understanding. “psycho wait for later then” he said to the surprise of most of the other weasels in the car except for smarty

“good idea” smarty said simply

“ahh, what’s good smarty?” stupid asked from the back peking his head over the seats

greasy put his hand over his face and shook his head while smarty just suppressed a groan

“psycho wait till later for friends to meet jennifer!” psycho said sounding prove and excited

“oh!” stupid said muffled by greasy's hand before lowing his head back down in the back of the car. but then lifted his head back up to the front of the car. “umm, who’s jennifer?”

smarty hit the breaks suddenly and hard causing stupid to launch into the windshield his face and tongue getting stuck to the windshield. smarty groaned and rolled his eyes with a small scowl on his face

psycho saw smarty had that look on his face a lot when stupid asked things like that. he remembered the first time he saw smarty with it on his face. he liked it! it made smarty look funny sometimes, and it was really nice to know someone else hated…them as much as he did

wanting to see where he was driving and not wanting to laid a hand on stupid’s butt which was disgustingly almost in front psycho’s face. smarty just grabbed him by his ankle and threw him to the back of the car. he landed right next to wheezy who, didn’t give much of a reaction besides a quick glance to stupid who was seeing stars from the sudden hit he just blew out some smock out the window he had opened and went back to his cigarettes

“we’re gonna put em on a one question a day rule” greasy commented looking at stupid in the backseats upside down. wheezy nodded agreeing with him as he threw out his used up cigarette and lit up another one for himself. greasy turned his head back to the windshield just in time to see toon town coming up

smarty groaned getting ready for probable headache he was gonna get from the town of idiots. he seemed to slow down a bit, but speeded back up probably realizing it was better to get whatever the toons were going to do over with

unsurprisingly the dumb bastards were playing on the road like they were trying to get run over. smarty counted it as a blessing lawsuits weren’t really a thing in toon town

mostly because they weren’t smart enough or just didn’t have the patients to understand the papers. otherwise they might have tried to suit him for doing what they were asking for and ran them over

after about Half a dozen now flatten toon smarty parked their car in the alley of the office. as soon as smarty was out of the car psycho jumped out before he closed the door since greasy just went through his door. as wheezy and a dizzy stupid stepped out greasy approached him and put a hand around his shoulders

“hope you and ya girl have fun tomorrow lover boy” he said patting psycho’s shoulder like he was wishing him good luck. psycho smiled and greasy took that as his cue to leave for the night. “well i’m gonna head home, see ya tomorrow nut job” he said letting go of psycho’s shoulders and tilted his hat as good to psycho and waved goodbye to the others as he walked off to his home

psycho was the only one who waved back much quicker then greasy was waving bye. he knew tomorrow was going to be fun, how couldn’t it be, especially since he was bringing the best thing in the world with him! psycho pulled out a firecracker and lit it up with a match

“hey psycho toss that and come on!” smarty celled out down the alley. psycho knew it wasn’t nice to keep smarty waiting for him before they went home to the hotel next to the office they stayed. smarty said staying near the office made it so he didn’t have to find a parking spot

he also said people in other towns that say they had a hard time to find somewhere to park hadn’t been to toon town, once a toon that seemed to be some kinda a cat toon with blue fur thought it’ll be a good idea to park in not one, not two, not three, BUT FIVE! parking spots with his fancy limousine

psycho remembered how one of smarty’s scowl turned into a happy smile once psycho did what he told him and cut it up with his switchblade till the pretty blue paint was gone showing the car's metal underneath

psycho threw the firecrackers behind him. a bit sad he wouldn’t get to see it pop since smarty was tired and he didn’t to want make him stay up waiting for him

psycho ran over to smarty ready to head to the large apartment that they called home. unbeknownst to psycho the firecracker landed in a cartoony colored shrub so green it looked like it made it’s own light not needing the sun to be seen in the dark and popped inside of it sending an already mad bird out of it landing on its tail feathers

the bird groaned angrily, officially giving up on finding a place to build a nest ‘stupid insane weasel! just you wait!’

as the bird thought that he heard someone walking up from behind him and turned his head to see who it was. his body froze in place as he recognized the feet of the person standing above him. he made his eyes slowly move up hoping he was wrong. but he wasn’t!

“well if it isn’t the little bird” wheezy said taking the cigarette out of his mouth and Tapping it so some of the ash fell on the bird's head. the bird shook his head putting out the ash on it’s head and started screaming it’s head off before flying as fast as it could away. vowing to leave Hollywood as soon as he could and never return!

“huh” wheezy chuckled at the bird watching it fly into the night sky and started the walk towards his home which wasn’t far either

psycho turned his head around just a few feet shy of the door to the building where him and smarty lived and scratched his ear. he could have sworn he heard that bird again. “psycho come on” smarty called from the other side of the glass door and psycho quickly forgot about it. maybe he was just hearing things

he hopped up to smarty’s side and followed him up the stairs to their room. hopping side to side on each step carful not to bump into smarty who would tell him to stop it if he did. even after they went up the flight of stairs psycho kept bouncing step to step

“guess ya excited for tomorrow” smarty said after psycho took a long jump towards the door to their home like a dog. he started Tapping his foot, like standing still was impossible for him right then

smarty stepped forward and took the keys out from the pocket where he kept his gold chain and unlocked the door. once it he had opened it, psycho immediately jumped through the doorway

“wish ya got like this on a normal day” smarty said walking in and closing the behind him and locking it with a yawn that stretched his jaw a bit wider then should go. “i’m gonna hit the hey psycho. night”

“good night smarty” psycho said as smarty walked to his bedroom.

psycho grabbed a nightcap he kept by the door and put on his head before he headed off to his bedroom, which smarty told to sleep in and not on the floor, psycho could barely sleep, tomorrow was so exciting psycho thought he was meeting another smarty!

——

 

*Ring ringgg*

jennifer climbed out of her couch the rots of blankets falling off her hand and grabbed her phone still felling exhausted as she sat up

“hello” she said into the dead air before she added in a whisper “are you sneaking around?”

a calm confidence filled all the quiet “birdie's has a package waiting for you” he said on the other line, she could possibly smell the cigar on his lips, “it’s belong a town near where you’ll confess about a mess” he said

she took in a breath through her nose eyeing her trench coat hanging on her coat rack by the door like a monster “i’ll be walking by there soon”

“you should see the sunset while your out, but go a hour or two before to be careful, wouldn’t wanna miss else it might not exist” he said it all sounded normal or even weird, but she remembered what they all really meant

on bad side of the city by a old church where the sun was facing, that were she’ll pick up what he took got out

“i wouldn’t miss for a world” she said

“good, be careful mrs sneaker something tells the bogeyman waiting” he told her

and jennifer woke up and grabbed her coat that second, her work bell was ringing and her break was over, time she went back to her real job

Chapter 12: at the park

Summary:

jennifer job came first before a lot of things, maybe even a day at the park with a new friend of hers

Chapter Text

jennifer breathed heavily her back to the wall of the long abandoned and dragged to hell building behind her, her throat bone dry as she checked her watch again like the sun coming up wasn’t enough to tell her they were late, and they were dead

that’s what the rule told her o, when somebody anybody was a second too late to meet you they were as good as dead, now if she wanted to follow it she had to leave now before they learned about the business she joined

the woman inhaled again one more look to her watch, it might as well had read “leave!” loud and clear to her, she pulled her hair cover over a bit to hide her face more, 5more minutes and then maybe she could sleep at night

“ma'am” someone said behind her, their voice small and seemingly coming from below her, to see the young teen in rags holding onto a boy's hand her job had keep above ground if it meant she went under

the teen girl shook the boy lightly, he started his half of the song in a whistle, ‘mr bubbles, mr bubbles’ they looked at her eyes wide until she started the other, she whistled the tone, ‘are you there, are you there’

she at waved Jennifer moving into a alley Jennifer followed her in, her trench coat up to hide everything she had to give them

the teen girl kept some feet away from her their backs to the other building, so she did the same, “so, ho-how do we, how are you going to help us” she asked jennifer she seemed to be readying to run if she moved a step

jennifer never knew what to say to them when they asked that, she wished sometimes she could just drop them off somewhere safe, but that was just her being selfish, “i, we, been helping a lot of people just like the two of you” she said kneeling slowly her voice went down to a whisper

“have either heard of, mr and mrs ehrlich” she asked them and too her joy they both shook their heads, with all the news buzzing around as the world went against itself by the work of a madman, she still found it a god sent miracle their hasn’t been noticed, she smiled at them smiling “that’s how good we are, and it’s what we’re going to do for the both of you” she promised

the baby boy spoke up then, but his words were something she couldn’t understand so the girl spoke for him “he’s right, you mean both of us, we stay, together” she told her

jennife looked then both in the eye, her gave out to them, “i promise, the both of you won’t get away if your not together” she said the boy moved his hands around his chest looking at her

“cross your heart?” the girl asked

“cross my heart may i die if it’s broken” jennifer said to them, the two looked at each other the boy smiled up at her leaning more into her and the girl nodded, “ok” jennifer looked at her watch “we have another hour at best” she said standing up and waving them to follow her

they left that alley going the way they didn’t come from, they were 5 mails away from where they could stay for awhile, till the madman had his brain blown out, they’ll just have to call home for a while

 

xxx

toon town own sun came up with a deep yawn, then it started the song it sang the second somebody made it, he must’ve hated the town just as much as them since smarty rather drink every drop of dip he found right now then to hear this song for a another second

he was up an hour before it did but that didn’t stop the sun's song from driving him into being like psycho!

psycho was holding onto the edge of the dark wood nightstand smarty gave him after he saw psycho empty besides bed in his room, psycho's eyes were stuck on the other psycho looking back at him

they both kept themselves from jumping, any second on, the clocks big hand moved to the 6, he waited the big hand moved to the 11 and there!

*RINGGGGGGGGGGGG*

psycho jumped up and slammed his hand down on the clock making it smash into small bits around his room he landed laughing at the clock carnage around his room

“psycho! what i say! dat ain’t for breakin’ fun!” smarty yelled outside his room, psycho turned to his door he cut a rocket into, he frowned eyes a bit blue, psycho wasn’t going to play the clock game for awhile, not until smarty was really very happy one day!

psycho threw his night cup on his toy chest up against the wall next to his small bed, smarty made psycho get a lot of things for his room after he came in and said a ‘bed isn’t enough psycho, come on, we’re getting some others thin’s’ he told psycho dragging psycho out of the happiness place he’s slept in

psycho came out his room, smarty was leaning out the window yelling up at the singing sun to shut it or he’ll start shooting at it, smarty slammed the windowsill shut shooting down his coffee like it were a shot and rubbed his burning eyes trying to out the fire

“co, come on psycho!” smarty yelled his eyes felt like they toughed sand paper, smarty left the room one hand over his eye psycho following behind, psycho jumped over and down the stairs they went to waiting for smarty to walk down them before another jump down the next

they went down the last steps and smarty spoke his eye felt normal again, “ya makin’ up fo dat the work ya missed when ya back” smarty told psycho as they to the door leaving the hotel, smarty went to the office and psycho followed behind up to the doors

there he spilled through smarty's hands and crushed him in a hug, “bye bye smarty” paycho said before running straight off, if a building came in his way he ran up and over

smarty watched run off, first time he’s open the door and wasn’t beaten to be the first one through the door, heh felt nicer then he remembered

xxx

jennifer lead the kids to one of their drop offs in holly wood though she’s never helped outside of the state, this one was one of the most used, nobody would think to look in a bar that made its rent off money that seemed to be made from blood, when really what people that came were part and in on it as some show and muscles

she went into the building, the kids stopped at the door, the buildings top looked decayed a fire escape crushed down and on the ground by the door, jennifer came back out waving them in and this time they followed

right now, the only sound made in the dark badly put together chairs and tables that were scattered like a played a chess board, was their feet stepping the wooden floorboards

“hello” jennifer whispered the kids didn’t need her to know to stay behind, “birdy, i have another two packages” she whispered again looking around the room, the little blue sun from the raising sun that leaked through the broken window, a chair had to help with that

*click* she jumped around, a small gold light came from a lightbulb above the center where he stood, his veil straight matching his khakis and dress shirts, what else for a man who worked distribution

jennifer sighed at him “it’s not a job to give us all heart attacks” she hissed at him

birdie took a rag and warped the center a strong lay of dust he couldn’t let last flying off, thought he could buy the place he just did to het rid of it, “i was just enjoying the early sunlight sneaker” he said to her

he stopped and walked around the corner hands in his pockets, “now, let’s get them to where their staying the night?” he said

jennifer put her hand on their backs leading them around the center to the middle of it, she went down and rolled the carpet up with the help of birdie, revealing the trap door underneath

birdie looked through the near window behind the center till jennifer called for the key he walked over with the small key from his sleeve, he undid the lock on the door and pulled it up

the kids moved away from thinking they’ll be pushed down into the darkness and kept there like the horror stories of the camps they heard everywhere

jennifer saw what they did, if she were them she would’ve already jumped through the wall like the toons did, “it’s ok” she rushed and whispered out to them “it’s just a hiding place until tonight” she said they looked at her like a witch telling them to hop into her oven

birdie laughed putting the key up his sleeve, “here, i’ll have the lights on for you's” he said walking down the leather like it was a hallway in his building, the only light there in the cellar was his clothes which were getting surrounded till he flipped the lights on

jennifer went down next for them, smiling up to them waving them down, so they did followed, “i love the new coat sneaker, go for something black next” birdie said to her as the children came down taking in the basement

“how, how are we supposed to stay here” the girl asked, she looked over all the beds and the bucket in the corner with a curtain above it, “we’re not staying here! we just want-“

“your just staying here until friday night at the most” birdie explained jennifer ignored him being her boss to glare at him

“could’ve said that slower burdie” she told him moving closer to him “the kids are already scared and overwhelmed by all of this!” she told him and he gave a small shrugged

“sneaker, a bandage that’s hanging by its hair should just be pulled off” he told her turning to the kids kneeing down

“now, we’re sorry that you’ll have to stay here for awhile, but it’s for your own good you know” he told them the kids nodded understanding “don’t make much noise or else you’ll be found and that is the last thing anyone of us wants to happen to you two”

jennifer put the beg and opened it, the gun he gave her on top of everything she’ll leave here she took it out then unpacked everything they’ll need “this’ll be enough, you should two to stay comfy down here” she said facing them “you two will be out of here and somewhere a lot better soon, remember i crossed my heart” she said and the young boy crossed his heart

“sneaker” birdie said by the way they had up, “the buyers will be here soon and our muscle won’t stand in the way of them hearing under their feet” he told her leaving himself

jennifer saw their fear and pulled them a little closer, “as long as your here, i’m your friend, if something happens you can come and get me” she said “i’ll keep you two together” she said pushing them together and the both of them smiled at each other before they turned to her nodding

“i’ll be back to get yous out of inn no time” she said went to leave when the trap door slammed shut and birdie spoke!

“good morning gent!” he said his foot taps told her to stay quiet and hole they didn’t hear the children behind her gash

jennifer started straight at the door birdie's talking being ignored as she listen for whatever sound she was about to make

she made one step backwards onto the other step the wood creaking lightly, it was enough to get the air out of her lungs when the talking didn’t stop, she moved again, one step, and then another her chest was swollen and tightened

another step and she finally reached the ground, and backed away to the child who had their eyes on her asking what to do, she turned and put a finger on her lips to them and went to her bag

she dug into it while the girl watched the door and the boy watched her, she took out the chessboard she brought, she smiled and placed it on the ground on her knees

the children walked over as she put the pieces on the board, thanks to birdie’s kinda of fun she knew at least where they went, they sat down in front of her, it took a second for her to notice, they didn’t know the how to play

she looked up worried, the loud radio and men talking over didn’t stop for a second, so she could jump for a risk, “ok, i’ll show you how to play, this” she put a hand on the king, “is the king, if you lose him i win” she whispered as the new day went on, that meeting she had with psycho might as well had been canceled now, she hoped she could think of a good excuse for it

xxx

humans are really slow, psycho knew that a lot when he ran around and they moved slower to him

he kicked his legs up and down into the park gate making it waddle under him, parks were boring like waiting was but waiting can be fun when psycho did in a fun way

smarty said psycho made him a lot of problems when psycho got too bored stand still even with a toy he throw his way, smarty liked waiting but didn’t make smarty boring, he alway joined psycho when he moved around

he met jennifer by not waiting, so psycho jumped down from the gate, he landed and started looking around the park, it was all quiet with the humans boring sun high and a lot of green trees around

peycho frowned so boring of a place him and his friend was meeting then his ears jumped at the sound of a duck quacking, he turned his head and saw ducks playing in the water

psycho put a hand to his mouth his smile behind it before he ran and jumped into the water! water was always fun to play in!

xxx

the boy moved the horse he couldn’t let go of to jennifer’s king, having his crown and winning the game! the boy said something fast and quiet, “does that mean we win?” the girl asked after the hour they spent doing this

Jennifer took her king off the board “yes you both win, against one person” she said they both gave her a look like they worked hard to win this “just let go to your head, you both win” she said told them after a eye roll

the girl whispered a yes and the boy tried covering her mouth so she pushed him off

“he’s right” jennifer told them, the girl said he wasn’t, but he was, another big rule working, talking is pulling the trigger “ he is,” she looked up to the ceiling most of the sound died out by now, “you can not, talk you can not speak you can’t make a sound when your being looked for if they find you they’ll make you go, do you two want that?” she asked, the boy shook his head fast holding onto the girl

“it’s ok” the girl whispered “she just wants us to act careful” she said

they all stopped at once, jennifer stood slowly her breathe stopped at the sound of four steps above their heads, step step, step step,

she bent down to them “ok, the upstairs is cleared” she told her pulling the boy up by his arms lightly and waving the girl over to the door which opened

birdie stood there holding one with one hand and his stocks on the rocks in the other, “i see you never miss your drink birdie” jennifer said as they all left the basement and he closed the door for them

“of course, this is the kind of thirsty work a man needs” he said setting the drink down his buzzing light business voice like he wanted a cigar, “now, sneaker it’s time you leave for your own good, my car will be here tonight for them” he told her

jennifer frowned glancing at the kids who left the basement with her, they looked worried they only trusted to a point but it was the most trust they gave anybody here, the world took most of it away already with the sound of gunfire they couldn’t see

the boy said something and the girl said something back, she couldn’t understand a lick of it, then she turned to her “we want to stay together sir” she told birdie nervous but firm on her words

birdie patted his veil where his heart was “i won’t let the world pull you two apart i promise you both” he told them, they eyed jennifer

“you can trust you two, he’s the one who started what brought you here” she told them it didn’t do a thing to help them start to trust him but the girl reminded her of her promise and crossed her heart to them, and to remember it

“i’ll remember it to my grave i swear to you” she told them “now just do what birdie over there saids and you’ll be safe” she told them and they nodded birdie came up behind

“it’s best if you leave now sneaker we can’t lose our best smuggler and hider when we’re up to our necks of 10s going around with their noses out” he said to her, his last few men he spend offer them came back on the newspaper, sickos found a way to use a coat hanger for their clean up on them

“stay careful stay quiet and stay away from anyone who isn’t a part of us” she told them they modded like her words disturb them but they understood them and that was important, the boy wave goodbye to her while the girl watched her leave out the back

she heard behind the door open and foot steps behind she threw her head around her shoulder to see bruiser had brought her a drink

“i fingered you need a shot after this news Darwin” he told her kindly handing it to her which she gladly took and shot down bad news in this business is how your heart would be hurting for a while

“what is it bruiser” she asked handing back the glass and he threw it to the ground simply

“those 10s been around sticking their noses here and there, been having some boys tell him off with some cop friends of my, but their using their head” he drank his drink easy “their circling us sneaker, so you’ll need this”

he dug into his pocket and pulled out a revolver, jennifer jumped at the gun since this has only been the third time she’s seen one in her life, he offered it to her saying if he could follow her around he would but his mother was get worried sick if he did

“how is she?” jennifer asked taking the gun with a sigh at his insistence

“she’s lookin’ right as rain the doctor's say, but she saying she can’t eat a thing in the mornin’” he told her, jennifer put the gun's safety on and stuffed it in her coat, “some preyin’ is what we need most for her dear, wouldn’t hurt if it wasn’t the three of us asking him for a hand” he told her

she huffed through her nose with a smile “birdie isn’t going to start preying till the world's on fire” she sighed at the end

he said yeah and checked his watch saying it’s time he went back to it “i’ll have some of the cookies for you to give her next time we see each other bruiser ” she said walking away

he watched her go till he couldn’t and went back inside, that friendly date might still be on the table and being alone with the 10s around was how she’ll end up on the paper

she started shaking with every step at that thought and stopped before it made look like a toon walking through the bad part of here like a nervous cop on portal

she waved down a car and got in telling him to get her to the park they were meeting at, maybe this date could happen after all

xxx

psycho jumped out of the water soaking from head to toe the ducks who were hiding in the bushes ran back into the water after that monster had left their pond, some of them were yelling at him for their missing feathers hoping they chocked him

psycho jumped around seeing the ducks wanted to play water tag again! he jumped back in but jumped out the same second when he heard the gate open up and saw a man opening the gate just as a car drove up and a lady stepped out

psycho's nose jumped at her smell, “jenmifer” psycho said he was in front of the gate with his hands around himself jumping up and down,

the man screamed from a heart attack psycho gave him, he told she had to wait since he’s gotta call animal control for psycho, she asked him not checking behind herself for whoever could’ve been there

he opened the gate and she stepped through on of her hands not leaving where she had the gun on her side, psycho got excited smarty said to never say gun around people so and psycho wasn’t allowed to play with them after smarty had to get a new hat

“i’m sorry for having you wait psycho, i just had a long start today” jennifer told psycho

“psycho had fun with ducks while psycho waited for jennifer” psycho told her he smiled crazed pulling his fire pops from his jacket, “psycho bring lots and lots of fire pops with him to!”

they were damped, psycho's swing was definitely why, jennifer told him that and psycho shook the water put of them and lit one of them

the man told them to stop that before something burnt down when it already popped and psycho started laughing which made the man look like he’s hearing a horror movie's killer

jennifer gave him a nervous smile, “we better leave now if we’re going to play with those psycho” she said psycho liked that idea, “great there's a great place by here” she said walking out of the park with psycho following

psycho jumped a full circle after he saw jennifer do that a lot, she stopped after psycho did it saying she heard something but psycho didn’t, jennifer was hearing thing like psycho did!

at the restaurant jennifer's menu was paused by the Giant sized Sunday psycho pulled out of the air, smarty asked him how does psycho do that but that was something for him to know when he got excited

psycho gave her a spoon and started digging in fast! with the sun out on their table on the outside he had to eat it one full scoop a mouthful, till he just froze completely the spoonful he was about to eat stuck in the air facing his open mouth

“psycho?” jennifer asked looking around the ice cream to see psycho frozen some icicles in his hair from his brain freeze! “psycho!” she moved out of her seat to psycho she tried shaking him but that was like shaking a rock

she looked around for some water thinking that’ll wake him, but her heart and eyes stopped dead at an overweight man dressed in a suit staring at her from across the cross walk hands in his pockets for his gun

he saw her seeing him and waved her over like he wanted her to run over for her own good like a cop getting her away from a escaped murder

she didn’t trust him she wasn’t ready to get tomorrow's paper's close up from a 10s new trick, she started racing to get her gun then psycho groaned awake

she got the gun out halfway out of her coat to show him she stood up to see he had made a run for the hills when she wasn’t looking, and when psycho started waking up

psycho groaned from the agony in his head remembering why smarty said no more ice cream for him, “ice cream evil to psycho” psycho told jennifer so she wouldn’t eat either

jennifer only heard his sppon drop and hit the floor which got her to put her gun back in her pocket and went give psycho her unknowing hero some comfort

“sorry to see you like psycho maybe a walk will make you feel better” jennifer rushing to get her purse off her seat “a walk will be nice right now am i right” she said rushing to throw the money onto the table

psycho beat her to it, ice cream was evil but ice cream had really petty voice singing to psycho to eat it again, “psycho pay like greasy say to” psycho told her jumping out of his seat, he landed on his old spoon and psycho barely pulled his eyes off it

jennifer checked behind them no one there, she grabbed psycho's hand and pulled him away from the restaurant when she stopped rushing off psycho had to land like a Katie

psycho wasn’t confused anymore from holding hands when psycho asked greasy, greasy got really really happy at that said psycho was another heart breaker! that was a good thing smarty told him

“psycho like racing” psycho said the little man came to the light and psycho went to crossing the road but jennifer wasn’t moving with him, he moved back to her “time psycho and jennifer moves”

jenmifer started walking lying to him thought her head felt like it was already everywhere anyway,

far off from them the detective sighed his knuckles telling him to give the stop sign a punch but settled for throwing his finger at the car who hooked at him for doing the crime of walking by

“poor girls doesn’t know what that weasels doin’” he said walking passed a doorway

a slender hand too bright and colorful to be a real humans grabbed his shoulders and pulled into the doorway

eddie held his hat down before it flew off his head, the lady that was taller then any man he’s seen shoved him to the wall, “detective valiant!” she hissed like a whisper looking behind where he went

he looked closer seeing through her hat and sunglasses, “geez Jessica i almost hit ya,” he said she looked back to him “why are you out of hiding i thought you and roger woulda gone missing by now”

“that was the plan, then doom saw it coming, he has men everywhere in hollywood, not to mention those weasels around driving out of town into a sunset would just end in us getting away in heaven” she told him “and as for roger, he woke up in the car and took off”

“why would he do that he was draw with some brains wasn’t he” eddie asked

“why else? to be the hero of the story,” she said she wished they all saw it, doom wanted their town gone if he could snap his fingers and make it happen that way he could and he nearly come with that damn machine!

some toons saw if the town was what he was after he can chock on it, a lot of them already packed up and ready to leave hollywood for their own good, but roger didn’t like the low numbers and ran to save everything

“i’ll find him later” she told eddie after he asked if she had an idea where he was and she already had a list ready to look through “right now you have to tell me about that lady you were looking at” she asked him

“nothing that could be called anything about her” eddie told her he was trying to get a lead on the judge when he spotted that nut hopping in the seat next to her, “all i know about her is she’s gonna end cut into pieces some time soon”

she asked what made him think that, “sorry to tell you but one of judge doom's weasels are hanging around her, my guess says she doesn’t know what he’s doing for a living” he told her

and she huffed her teeth girded, “damn” she said eddie asked what made her impatient “she’s part of a group, they sneak jews out of those camps and into here like nothing on the daily, if anyone can get all of us out of here before doom finds us it’s them” she told eddie

“how did you dig that up on her?” eddie asked she told him he wasn’t the only one who could be following her, “we better try finding roger right now, with that nut walking around her we’ll be in hot water when the rest find us and so will she”

“so hit him in the head with a pan always worked on roger” Jessic rabbit said suddenly

“yeah if it wasn’t that one can out run the road runner” eddie told her, he didn’t tell jessic that story but that pride of his couldn’t hide the bite leg, “and i don’t think you get the drop on either”

“so! what else do we do mr valiant, wait until we’re covered in dip” she asked him

“no,” he huffed in a whisper looking passed the door way seeing she wasn’t there but he had a good idea where to find her, “i’ll go and find her, get to pull some strings for us once that nut isn’t around her” he said

“good enough of a plan but how are you not going to spook her when she just saw you staring at her?” she asked “she’ll have a gun by now with me following her”

eddie tried thinking about that but he gave up when nothing came to his head and threw his shoulders around “i’ll-i’ll think of something, right now go grab roger by the ears and pull out of trouble, when you get him” he took out a notepad writing on it “go to here when you got him i’ll tell you what i’ll get got it”

“yes i do” Jessica said taking the note from him “see you here when i grab roger, good luck eddie” she said and they both ran in different ways

jennifer hugged psycho, psycho wrapped his arms around like he did himself the first one or the hug the better, but smarty taught him not to break backs anymore

“psycho, let go” jennifer said and psycho did what she said and she pulled herself back up, “next time let’s start with a handshake” she said breathing slowly

psycho giggled at that “but hugs are funnier” he said

‘remember nutty heartbreaker, here’s my best rule for you, when a lady’s saying goodbye to you give her a little pleasant’ greasy told psycho then he tried making him laugh by pointing at his cheek and making his lips funny

jennifer said she’ll call him later but when she turned around to make a run home, psycho jumping on one of feet in front of her saying “jennifer wait! psycho have pleasant! really great pleasant!” he told her

he reached in his neck and pulled out the greatest thing humans ever make! psycho pulled it out his hand stretching to hand it to jennifer! “psycho brought jennifer fire pop!” he told her

his eyes were moving so fast from this jennifer felt her head sinning, she shook her head looking at the firecracker, psycho was acting like this was the deed to America

she smiled holding her hands together for psycho to drop it in them, “thank you for the pleasant i’m sure this’ll come in handy” she told him putting it in her pocket

“it’s for fun to stop boring time!” psycho told her smiling when he took a few out, psycho lit them up and threw them down! when they psycjo started laughing enough to get jennifer's nerves down

as nice as this was, jennifer had to leave and waved her goodbye before he turned and raced passed her, smarty really needed to know about the fun psycho had!

jennifer nearly got knocked down by him, she stopped watching race off to toon town where the rest of the toons had to stay, but from a friend birdie told her about when he was chin deep in a small drink, the toons over there was running off any else for some reason

a Gargaro calling himself a judge was the reason and she looked forward to never meeting him

she walked forward her appointment was where her phone was, far enough not to see him eddie followed her

Chapter 13: smarty see show with psycho!!

Chapter Text

“huh, think he’s gonna be late boss?” greasy asked smarty after he took a look at the clock in smarty’s office. smarty took a look at the clock himself and shook his head

“remember greasy, psycho’s faster then that road runnier, almost got thanks to him” smarty answered

greasy smiles at that old memory. they would have got him if not for that stupid coyote, that idiot dropped a rock on his foot and made psycho trip over his body. him and the others tried to get that coyote but he fell off a cliff before they could dip him. “sure he’s fast but what if he don’t know what time it is eh?” he said

”wear are stupid? quit asking all these dumb questions!” smarty said fed up with that with him

“well. unless he’s having himself some fun with his little doll” greasy said with a wink like it was an obvious option

“greasy don’t ya have a-“

smarty was irritated by his door suddenly opening like something crash through it. startling him and greasy. greasy was looking at the doorway while smarty just turned his head to the side to the other chair he had in his office and immediately spotted the culprit spinning around in one of the other chairs in the room

“psycho ya better stop breain' down my doors or ya gonna be payin' for em” smarty said smiling when greasy shot his head around to see psycho. his falling mouth open on sight. getting out of his chair and walking around his desk smarty said. “come on, i’m starvin' and i didn’t feel like cookin' us somethin' taday” and psycho hopped off his seat after one last spin to follow smarty. he left it still spinning a bit

psycho followed him out his office and greasy soon followed them. “psycho coming but psycho not hungry” he said as he waved at stupid who was sitting on the floor and leaning his back on the wall trying to eat a little white ball with red laces on it

“stupid get that baseball outa ya mouth!” smarty yelled at him. stupid complied and spit the ball out, it bounced off one of the walls and hit smarty in the forehead knocking him to the wall

not knowing any better stupid stared laughing hysterically. psycho joined him, they were both so focused on their laughing they didn’t see smarty stand up and stomped over to stupid. he stood in front of the idiot and kicked him right in his belly spending back into the wall

while for psycho who was giggling joyfully and kinda calmly for toon, but if he was a human he wouldn’t be breathing properly. though somehow he was standing up perfectly find, smarty slapped him over his head with a annoyed scowl on his face “stop laughin ya clowns!” he yelled

psycho rubbed his head thanking smarty for stopping him and smarty told he wasn’t gonna keep stoppin him if he kept laughing that much he better lean to stop it

psycho rubbed his head again saying sorry to which smarty brushed psycho's hand off his head “yeah yeah, quit rubbin' ya head and come on” smarty said as he walked out and psycho followed him, psycho thought it was funny smarty said he’ll stop saving him, smarty was really good at jokes

“psycho had fun with jennifer today” psycho told smarty “jennifer psycho's new friend now smarty”

smarty thought he better hear about her now in case, she had something to hide from them, “yeah? what’s ya two do anyway? go running around town” he asked

psycho turned to smarty smiling big “psycho and jennifer get first then ran all around for a little after ice cream, jennifer had to go fast or else jennifer would forget lines for work” psycho told smarty

smarty unlocked his side of the car since psycho never needed him to open his before, smarty climbed in while psycho standing besides his seat “liens, psycho don’t tell me she’s a some dumb actress livin’ ‘ere” smarty said, every time he turned a corner by the studios he ran into one of them, and a chump or two working for the lady ones, “your not stupid ya know so don’t start actin like em” he told psycho eyeing when they hit the road

psycho frowned leaning back to the window, “jennifer not like stupid smarty, smarty really like psycho's new friend if smarty met jennifer” psycho said to him smarty huffed rolling his eyes only saying that was rough of him. psycho lit up then from his head’s gears working “psycho's gears working, smarty really has to go to jennifer’s show! psycho really want smarty there to meet jennifer there!” psycho said

”hey easy on dat voice psycho” smarty said rubbing his ears “psycho, do ya really think we shoulda leave work with dat rabbit ‘round ta see some girl's show” smarty said

psycho then gassed as if smarty just said the smartest thing he’s every heard. “lother friends to, they should come and meet jennifer” he cheered the rings in his eyes moving faster and faster but kept his voice down for smarty's bad ears “it’ll be really fun!” he said

“psycho! psycho! calm down!” smarty said. he couldn’t believe he didn’t even leave toon town yet, speaking of which he finally got out of there, “i thought greasy told you there’s some kinda rule bout introducing friends to people” smarty said “look right now i just want ta grab lunch already” smarty said going down the road

psycho nodded. still saying “psycho still think smarty will like jennifer, jennifer smart like smarty, nice too” he said

”psycho i just told ya later bout that girl” smarty said pulling into a dinner “i think i’m getting pancakes what’s it ya want” he asked

“smarty coming to jennifer's show?” psycho asked ignoring smarty’s question. his little way of demanding an answer to his question, and if smarty didn’t give him an answer he’ll ignore everything he’ll say until he got it

smarty huffed “find psycho! i’ll go ta see your doll's show, ya happy” he said and psycho nodded, probably for the best he meet her soon, he heard cops been having girls get cozy with whoever to get their handcuffs on people

“yes psycho very happy! but is other friends coming?” psycho asked smarty, smarty said he was fed up about this and told psycho that’s all his job and to come and left the car, and psycho followed him in “smarty like psycho has other friend” he asked

smarty shrugged grabbing a menu and helping themselves to a table “geez” he murdered “who’s gonna know psycho, i don’t know dat girl yet psycho, oh and till i do quit tellin’ everythin’ bout us got it” he told him and psycho nodded fast promising smarty as the waitress came by

——-

jennifer felt like she was turning a loon like psycho already was, she felt eyes on her but everywhere she went and looked she was alone sometimes the only one walking down the road, she kept walking should we run into one their bars or maybe shops no she couldn’t do that! panting a bit she rushed around a corner and ducked behind a trashcan just enough forward so she could see corner

she didn’t breath, and her heart jumped but she couldn’t tell if it was from horror or relief that she was losing her mind, her fat ass follower came around corner walking casually like he’s done this before, jennifer moved backer wanting not to what he does if it meant this would be the last she see him, the thought of using the gun was making her so sick she’llfall over

she didn’t breath all she did was stay still and wait, she heard a door open up and out came a lady holding a bag, “hey! what are you doing to my trashcan!” she yelled “shoot up your drugs somewhere else or i’ll blow your legs off!” she added throwing the bag

jennifer fell down got up and ran out of there before she found out she meant getting her gun, she crossed the street looking behind her only to see the concrete of the sidewalk and road no fat follower in sight! now her's chance to let birdie know to get rid of him for good, she didn’t like thinking about his details

Notes:

i did a lot of editing of this and i can’t tell how much fun i’m having doing it i really hope you enjoy and if you do even one Kudo always makes my day thanks for reading this

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