Chapter 1: Paralysis
Notes:
So first, some angsty Mine.
Chapter Text
Shane is hidden in the kitchen. He’s terrified as he listens to the scene that is happening in the living room. The screaming. The crying.
Micah, Blaine...
His dad is the one who’s screaming.
Shane is pretty certain that Micah is the one who’s crying.
And then there’s Blaine, who tries to sound so brave and confident in the situation, who is lying his ass off to save Shane. Shane is cowering in fear. He can’t stop shaking and he has to stop himself from sobbing, because his parents can’t know he’s here, and crying means they’ll hear him.
The distress is causing paralysis of his entire body. He closes his eyes and he waits for it to be over.
Please. Let it be over.
The moment Micah lands on the curb, his brain needs to catch up with what the hell just happened. Bart Anderson slams the front door with a loud thud and the sound makes his entire body vibrate.
He slowly picks himself up and he tries to get home, but every step feels heavy. It feels like he’s still in shock. He is wobbling and he walks towards his house and his mind is reeling.
Stupid.
Stupid.
Stupid.
Blaine warned them. Blaine kept reminding them to be careful and to not be affectionate in the house, but Shane and Micah thought they knew better. Micah almost throws up when he thinks about what happened and he’s terrified on Blaine and Shane’s behalf.
He is in a state of mental paralysis and he doesn’t fully realise he’s home until the front door opens and he snaps out of it. His parents stare him down and Micah takes in the look on their faces and he knows.
They know too.
“Come in,” his mother says without any trace of affection.
Micah has no choice. He follows them inside.
Chapter 2: Death
Summary:
Since Jude’s death, Blaine has been going through the contents of the camera to cope. It doesn’t work.
Chapter Text
Everyone dies one day. That’s a fact. But you’re supposed to die after a long and fulfilling life, surrounded by loved ones.
Jude died alone.
That is all that Blaine can think about. Jude is gone. He’s dead. All that is left of him is a camera, especially now that his parents have started clearing out his room.
Blaine goes through the photos again. It’s become a daily occurence.
The remaining four all got a memento, but it isn’t enough. Blaine would trade this camera for Jude’s life in a heartbeat. But he can’t, so he has to hold on to it. The four of them have already gone through all the contents, hoping to find a clue on what happened and who killed him, but nothing.
In fact, the camera is filled with happy memories. There are many photos with the five of them smiling, dancing and hanging out. There’s an epic photo of Erin finishing first in a track competition. There’s a gorgeous photo of Shane dancing with full concentration, not knowing he’s being watched. There’s a photo of Micah smiling excitedly in an antique book shop.
And there are so many photos of Blaine.
Those hurt a lot. It’s clear to Blaine now: Jude loved him. They never managed to say it.
But the photos that hurt the most are the rare ones with Jude on it. Jude was almost always the photographer, so they are scarce. It hurts to see Jude so full of life. Blaine zooms in on his smile and he starts to cry.
Chapter Text
Kurt isn’t the first person who went to Dalton for solace.
It’s Kurt, who got bullied for who he was. His friends at McKinley tried to help him. His family is incredibly supportive. But in the end he lost. He had to go. He couldn’t deal with it anymore. He prides himself for his confidence and bravery, but even that got broken.
It's Logan, who will never be enough, especially for his father. Everything about him is deemed wrong, from his personality to his sexuality. His existence pisses everyone off and no matter what Logan does, he always fucks up again.
It's Merril, who lived on the streets for a week after her parents kicked her out. She will never fully wrap her head around it. How could her parents, who are supposed to love her unconditionally, do that to her? All because they keep seeing her as their disgraceful son. It hurts to be denied like that.
It's Blaine, who puts so much pressure on himself to be perfect. His life got shattered when Jude died. Then Erin and Becca left. Then Micah disappeared. That death was the beginning of the end. It’s almost as if a part of him died that day as well.
It's Julian, who one some days doesn’t even know who he is. He gets so lost in the façade that he’s created for himself, it’s hard to distinguish his actual personality from his Hollywood persona. Who is he? He’s exactly who you want him to be. It doesn’t matter if he likes it.
It’s Reed, who doesn’t understand what he is feeling, and his mother isn’t making things easier by trying to mold him into someone he’s not. He does what he’s told. He doesn’t have the luxury to think. Sometimes, he prefers not being able to think, because it means he doesn’t have to face who he might be.
It’s Shane, who searches endlessly for Micah. He’s been left behind, even by Blaine. He gets why, but it still hurts to lose his friends and his lover in a short period of time. Micah is nowhere to be found, but Shane will not give up.
It’s every queer kid who’s ever set foot on Dalton Academy. It’s every queer kid who will. It's Dalton Academy, where they have to grapple with the harm that they’ve been through. But things will get better.
Notes:
Honestly, you gotta read Healing now. It does get better.
daintylemonsquare on Chapter 1 Sat 16 Jul 2022 02:00AM UTC
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daintylemonsquare on Chapter 2 Sat 16 Jul 2022 02:01AM UTC
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