Archive of Our Own ^beta

It’d taken about seven months, three under a pact, to finally get them to this point. Alone, studying with him in the attic, in a room he’d hated for so long but… had become accustomed to. Almost… attached to. It was as if there was some aura or energy that clung to the air, weightlessly pressing in and soothing his temper before it could even stir.

How curious… something that had once been so suffocating had now become so blissfully tepid and mild…

Another two months passed before he’d been able to first relax his guise, exposing his more true form. Altering one’s appearance wasn’t difficult by any means, but it did use some effort that didn’t have to be spent.

That’s what he’d told them anyway.

They didn’t stay as long that day.

But a few weeks after that, they did.

He’d stay on the bed, making nothing but the subtlest of movements, just enough to communicate he was awake. Often, he’d hardly look at them or even open his eyes. Just lay and listen to the soft scratch of quill tip to parchment.

Sometimes they’d talk to him, their voice cheerful but… doubtful. As if they still weren’t as comfortable around him as they’d been leading him to believe…

Maybe that was why he found himself caught between the pulls of building their trust, and pushing their limits.

His intentions could never truly be pure, he knew that well, but he still wanted them to understand.

And if they couldn’t?

Let him find out. 

Let him fall into the end.

There was only so long he could stand at the edge wondering, waiting.

Watching them smile so genuinely for a moment, only to falter the next and shatter what little hope had formed.

He deserved to be feared.

He deserved to be hated.

But still, they insisted on coming.

Insisted on staying.

Insisted on more.

Sitting beside him in class.

Volunteering to be his partner.

Saving a seat for him at dinner.

Was this what it had felt like?

The moment… before their hope had died?

Knowing they hated him would be so much easier to bear. 

That’s what he’d accepted as truth, anyway.

So when they showed signs of forgiveness, it only tortured him more. Sometimes he could make them laugh. Sometimes they would tap his foot back.

Sometimes… sometimes they would accept his invitation to dance.

“Hey, Belphie?”

It’d be so much easier if they hated him.

“I thought demons only made pacts. What’s this about contracts?”

Or at least, didn’t treat him so normally.

“That may be how sorcerers teach it,” he said, laying on his back with his arms crossed behind his head, staring up at the canopy they’d hung over his bed with Beel some months back. They’d picked out some nice heavy curtains that blocked out both sound and light…

He closed his eyes with a quiet sigh, breathing out the thought.

“Demons are a little different, though.”

“Is it something that’s filled out already?” they asked, a smile in their voice. “Lemme guess, there’s a whole circle of Hell dedicated to the paperwork now.”

He chuckled and tilted his head back, peering at them as they sat on the floor, scribbling away.

“Is that something you think belongs in Hell?”

“Definitely,” they answered without hesitation, keeping their back to him and flipping to another page. “Never get a desk job, Belphie. It’s the worst.”

“Mm… I don’t think I’ll have that problem,” he said, rolling onto his stomach, eyes never leaving their back.

“Fair,” They hummed, flipping through a few more pages. “You’d fall asleep before lunch, guaranteed.”

“I’d fall asleep on the way there.”

They laughed, and he took the opportunity to crawl to the edge of the bed, reaching his fingertips to the floor.

Then he waited.

With nothing more to add, the room soon quieted to nothing but the rustle of paper and gentle scratch of quill tip on parchment. Even the lazy sway of his tail had quieted, as it often did when he fell asleep.

But he was wide awake.

Tonight.

He slowly lowered down to his palms, silently crawling forward until he’d fully made it off the bed, pausing only now and then whenever they moved more than usual.

Little by little he stalked closer, feeling a sickening in his gut at just how easy it was to get this close to them without detection.

Would they ever truly be able to trust him again?

It had to be tonight.

He knelt behind them, leaning forward while his tail curved around them slowly, alerting them to his presence before his chin hovered over their shoulder.

A shiver ran through their body, stealing their breath.

But they didn’t move away.

“Would you like me to teach you?” he asked softly, relaxing his tail onto the floor.

They breathed out slowly, shoulders stiff and quill fallen slack.

“Sure,” they said calmly, “learning from you would be way easier than this old book.”

Still afraid.

“It’s simple when you think about it,” he said, reaching around and snatching up their paper and quill. He flipped it over and laid down on his side, propping his chin up in his hand while he began to write.

“I, Belphegor, Avatar of Sloth, do swear to fulfill one request within my power to grant by the human who signs this contract by the eve this was penned. In return, I request that same human lay beside me for one evening while I sleep,”

He smiled to himself, hoping they’d find it amusing too while quietly adding an additional line.

“Simple as that.” He tapped the quill, scratching one long line across the bottom before sliding it toward them again. “A demon writes the contract, and the human decides if it’s fair.”

“Huh…” They slid the paper closer to them, skimming over his writing. “And pacts are…”

“More in the sorcerer’s favor,” he mused with a lazy flick of his tail.

“Right…” They seemed lost in thought for a moment, then frowned. “Hey, wait… Belphie, this was my homework!”

It was time.

He chuckled, closing his eyes to keep himself from looking at their face. “Contracts between human and demon are naturally cursed, all physical trace of them vanishes when you sign.”

“Oh, well that’s—“

They’d started to speak so casually, as they always had before, but went silent in the space of half a breath.

So they had read it.

And understood its meaning.

He kept his eyes closed, letting the end of his tail sway side to side while he waited, lazy, soft strokes upon the rug.

No sounds of movement or the tearing of paper.

No sound of the scratching of a signature either.

He knew writing it on their assignment was forcing the choice, but he’d still written it in a way they wouldn’t have to sign. At worst, the professor would find it strange.

And he’d probably be more embarrassed by that fact than they would…

He’d just sleep the next few days away until he no longer cared.

Either way, he’d finally have his answer. Then he could move on and keep his promise to protect them for Lilith’s sake if not their own.

Still there was no movement or sound…

Waiting was so tiring.

Did he really need to know right in the moment? 

The wording had been so open… 

He could just find out tomorrow morning if they signed it…

He lowered his head, tucking his chin into his arm and relaxing his breathing.

Even if it could never truly be what it was before…

Maybe… it… could be…

The gentle scritch-scratch of quill on paper snapped his attention, and he lifted his head, catching the final stroke of their signature.

The moment the tip left the page, letters began to glow a soft lavender hue and peel off the page, rising into the air like petals falling in reverse, only to vanish in soft pops of light.

“You signed it…” he whispered, just loud enough for them to hear.

“Oo, nice effect~” They mused, watching the last few sparkles rain down in their outstretched palm. “You didn’t tell me it’d be so pretty.”

“… You really signed it.”

He hadn’t even realized he’d said it aloud again until they looked down at him with a brief smile before kneeling up to gather their things. 

“It seemed fair to me, so why not?” 

He watched in silence as they tucked their books under their arm and stood up, making their way to the door.

“Is it cool if we do it tonight?” They asked, looking back. “I just need to get ready for bed real quick, then I’ll be back.”

“Sure,” he said, still a little dazed and speaking to himself more than their back as they walked out, “take your time…”

True to their word, they returned a short while later, freshened up and ready for bed, dressed in a silken pajama set from Asmo. 

He sat on the edge of the bed, watching as they walked in.

Confidence at first, but the last few steps carried hesitation.

“Well,” they said, gesturing to themselves. “If I understand right, I just have to lay with you all night while you sleep, right?”

“Right,” he said, standing up slowly and gesturing for them to climb into the bed. “You should feel lucky,” he said with a dry smile, “I don’t usually offer to do requests let alone for something so small.”

They smirked and crawled across the bed, laying on their back at the furthest side. 

“Yeah, but,” they said with a small laugh, “Who could resist such a deal?”

Who, indeed.

He pinched the silver cord that tied the curtains back.

“Do you mind if I draw these closed?”

“Well…” their voice faltered for a moment, then became lighthearted once more.

“Beel and I did get them for you, it’d be a shame if you didn’t use them.”

Of course.

He smiled sadly to himself, feeling a small twinge of regret as he loosened the cord and let the curtains fall closed.

Always thinking of his comfort.

While he did nothing but push them.

Their breathing stuttered, and he made an effort to drag his knees across the corner of the bed as he knelt, giving them sound within the dark abyss that now surrounded them.

Every breath, every small tremor of their body was seen and felt, almost rippling in the space between them, causing the bristles of his tail to rise in response.

He watched.

And waited.

They remained on their back with an arm draped across their stomach. Something to appear casual, but quick to defend if needed. Or perhaps it was a soothing gesture, to feel one’s weight across the body.

He let his tail swish, drawing lazy curves behind his back. 

“These curtains block a lot of senses from the outside,” he said, drawing closer. “Would it help if you could see me?”

“Y-Yeah,” they laughed nervously, their face turning toward the sound of his voice. “Guess I didn’t grow out of being afraid of the dark after all.”

Liar.

He exhaled slowly, tuning into their subconscious mind with every breath they took.

Then he drew himself up higher on his knees, lifting one single finger to bring the first star to life in his own personal night sky.

“I don’t mind,” he said, illuminating the space between them little by little, one star at a time.

“You are in bed with a demon, after all.”

They chuckled a little less nervously this time, finding their humor again when they could see his face.

“Why Belphie~ you almost make it sound indecent.”

He looked down at them with a coy smile of his own, lowering himself down again. “Well, I can’t help if you interpret it that way.”

They stiffened briefly again when he moved to make himself comfortable, laying down on his side an arm’s length away. Their eyes were on the stars, while he instead admired the reflections while tucking his arm under his head.

He’d had to settle himself up a little, resting more on his cheek with his horns keeping his head somewhat upright, but enough pillows made it comfortable enough.

What mattered more was exposing them to his demon form, and finding the boundary of their limit as soon as possible.

“You can leave at any time, you know,” he said.

“I know,” they said, staring up at the stars.

“Our pact overrides any contract too.”

“I know.”

They’d never been this close to him for such a long period.

“There’s no hidden clause… if the contract is broken, it just becomes nothing between us.”

The curtains gave the illusion that the outside world was nothing more than a distant memory… no longer a place within reach to escape from his grasp.

Nothing but the space between them, both stretching and collapsing inward with every breath.

In time, they tilted their head to him again and reached their hand out further.

“I know.”

He flinched, staring at it. Relaxed and waiting.

Waiting for him to take it.

“If our hands separate when we’re sleeping, I’ll still accept it,” he said quietly, closing his eyes with his false smile, even adding a playful flick of his tail to deepen the effect. This was meaningless, just as anything else. “It just has to be until I fall asleep.”

“Okay,” they said, stretching out their hand a little more. “Let’s try it, Belphie.”

Let’s try it.

Could they really see through him?

He reached out and rested his hand in theirs, waiting for them to hold first before gripping maybe a bit too tight. They gasped and he relaxed in an instant, feeling his heart start to race.

“So, just like this… for the rest of the night?” They asked, voice hardly unsteady at all. “That fulfills what you wanted?”

“…yes.”

“Okay.” They squeezed his hand a little tighter, caressing him with their thumb. “I can do that, Belphie.”

He wanted to reciprocate. To let these feelings grow, but he willed his hand stay soft, limp and unmoving. One wrong move could break the spell, so it was better to remain heavy and inert, weighted to the bed to do little more than nothing.

“But.”

He flinched imperceptibly at the word, but held himself still while they rolled over onto their side, facing him.

“You didn’t have to make a contract for something like this.”

He smiled wryly, letting his tail sweep low across the bed, “I should’ve known. You know my true motive, don’t you?”

“Mm… I have a feeling, but I can’t say for sure.” They tilted her head to gaze at him, “But I don’t think it matters.”

His face must’ve been amusing, because they laughed and rolled their head away, giving his hand a reflexive squeeze.

“I mean like, you’ll just tell me if you feel like it so why worry about it?”

He’d squeezed their hand without meaning to, and they looked into his eyes with a gentler smile this time.

“Get some rest, Belphie,” they said.

“I’ll still be here in the morning.”

No other words could have put him so at ease… As if they’d cast a spell, wiping away every last tension he’d held, soothing every ache and pain in each and every muscle until he felt he could truly become one with the mattress.

This was… still something fragile. 

Something broken and jagged. 

He might never repair it, but for now… 

For now he could have this moment.

Their breathing began to slow, falling into the steady rhythm of sleep as their hand fell slack, still tucked under his. 

Nothing but peaceful rest upon their face.

He drew himself in closer, holding their hand close to his chest, his tail brushing up and searching, curling around their ankle in a loose tether to anchor him to this moment.

This small moment of a human’s trust.