Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Una-Met, the one you know as Toffee, stared at nothing, bags under their eyes, while Rasticore and Tecoloa argued in Septarian. Necahua seethed in silence, staring at the table. "And what if it does happen?" Rasticore was saying. "What, we're supposed to rely on Star to do the right thing? The Last Resort is still centuries away. She won't care about what happens to her people that far into the future! And I know she definitely won't care, because she's clearly not smart enough to consider the consequences of her actions!"

"We have no idea how she even knew that spell! For all we know, Glossaryck told her it was a fun prank spell. And what do you suggest we do about it?" Tecoloa replied, ghostly figure advancing on Rasticore, clipping through the table they were sitting around. "Mount a full-scale offensive? You know what happened last time."

"No," Rasticore said. "I was thinking assassinations. Leave the kingdom in a succession crisis, and then offer one of our own as a solution."

"We tried that already!"

"We didn't have as many resources then as we do now!" Rasticore protested. "We have more spies, more leverage in the castle, heck, we even have more magic."

"No we don't! We lost the well, or did you not remember your history classes?"

"We can sneak back in. Those gatekeepers are neutral, they don't intentionally choose sides."

"Yes, and how do you intend to get around the –"

A cough, from the person at the foot of the table. "Are you two sure now is the best time to be having this conversation? We were supposed to be – I mean, really, if you continue like this, I'll have to force you two to get a room," they said, glancing at Una-Met.

Una-Met didn't seem to notice them at all. They shrugged, and kept talking. They never shut up. "I mean, right now we have to focus on what's really important. And maybe we shouldn't tear each other to pieces over the next step until we've processed this one."

Rasticore and Tecoloa glanced at each other, chastised.

"No!" Necahua said, standing up. They slammed their hands on the table, making sure they were corporeal for added dramatic effect. "We have to do something! We can't just sit here and do nothing! We need to make her pay for what she's done!"

The person at the foot of the table sighed, and shook their head, and stood up. "Necahua, can I talk to you for a minute?" they asked, gesturing outside.

"...fine," Necahua said. They followed the person outside. "What is it?"

"I don't think you or... anyone realize this, but Una-Met took this defeat very hard. They're not saying anything, but that's just their way. And the way she finished the battle..."

"Yes, that's the point!" Necahua said. "She broke her promise to me, she –"

"She doesn't matter! Una does!"

Necahua slammed their jaw shut.

"Look, Necahua, I know Star did the one thing she promised not to do, and you want revenge. I understand. If I were you, I would, too. Hell, I want it without being you. But we have to worry about the direct consequences of her actions first! Una's barely spoken a word since it happened. They didn't even think of the obvious plan to lure the army into the Mountains so we can deal with them. I had to point it out on my own! If I didn't see them doing it in another timeline, I would've totally missed it too! The point is, we need everyone to concentrate on making them feel better. This wasn't even supposed to be a strategy meeting! I invited members of Una's family because we were supposed to make them feel better! If they're stuck in an endless flashback they can't help us with our totally awesome revenge plan, and we need to do that together, right ?"

"...okay," Necahua said.

"And we will get our revenge. I have an idea that will definitely raise the stakes. You just sit back and watch."

Later, Necahua looked out the window, listening to Toffee and the person next to them talk to each other with half an ear, staring out at the city spread out in front of them. Then raised voices shook them out of their reverie. 

"You did what ?" Toffee was saying.

"Raised the stakes!" the person said, grinning a sharp grin. "Your previous plan was a half-measure. We need to go all in if we're going to win this thing."

"My previous plan did not threaten the destruction of the entire multiverse!"

"Yes, but that is easily prevented. The Butterflys will quickly notice it before it has the chance to spread, but they won't be able to stop it on their own. They'll need us, and they'll agree to any of our demands."

"You're missing the part where the entire multiverse is our hostage!"

"Pfft, I had them drop off near the Mountains Whose Name is Unpronounceable in Your Tongue. It won't spread that fast, and there's only one well anywhere near there. It's... well. You know."

Toffee sighed. "And how do you know it won't spread so fast we can't reverse it? And what if we do succeed, and the Butterflys go back on the deal and use all I've taught them to do actual damage?"

Their grin widened. "It won't and they won't. Don't worry, I would never have done this if there was any way it could go wrong."

"We both know that's not true."

"Well, it will work out," they said, eventually. "It has to."

"Yes, it certainly does. And there's no way to reverse it?"

"No. Put too many safeguards and magic-draining traps in the code of the spell for that."

"Explain to me, then, exactly how you cast the spell. You're supposed to be conserving your magic."

"I didn't cast the spell. I just had a chat with the Realm of Magic and they cast the spell for me. This has to do with the Realm of Magic, and I caught them in one of their rare lucid states, so they were the best one to do this. My sibling interrupted me while I was explaining it to them, and they get confused easily, poor thing, but the spell should work as intended."

"Should?"

"They'll need their priorities reset. But I'm sure Glossaryck will do that for me."

"Glossaryck? Really?"

"Well, the Butterflys are just so vulnerable when they're sleeping! And they'll end up where we want them anyways, it's just that they'll probably have a few bite marks and a lot of grief on their hands. And they may fall into a dream they'll never wake up from, eventually."

"I suppose that makes sense," Toffee admitted. "Any plan where Glossaryck loses magic is elevated in my eyes. But that doesn't change that the rest of the plan is stupid and reckless."

"We could use a little recklessness around here, don't you think?"

"No."

Necahua grinned from their window. This sounded perfect. Everything their sibling wanted, and everything they wanted. Perhaps this time the Butterflys would pay . Especially Star. Their sibling thought Star was redeemable, and if they were right, Necahua would see her crawl on her knees begging for forgiveness. Star wanted the support of all monsters? She'd get it if she tore her kingdom apart, and she would like it .

That feeling lasted approximately two and a half months, until their newest spy told them that Moon adamantly refused to talk to him about anything important, citing her busy schedule as the painfully transparent reason. The spy had been more gentle, saying that Mewni needed to be changed so that Moon didn't have so much on her shoulders, but Necahua wasn't charitable. And Star, despite her constant talk about Mewman-monster equality, was doing nothing. She'd promised to talk to Moon, but they all knew the value of her promises.

Toffee sighed. "Okay... Rasticore, do you have anything to report?"

"Well, I threw a few scales through the portal when Heinous wasn't looking, but they can only sense with touch, so not as much spying on them as I'd hoped. And Heinous and Olga are probably going to go to the nuclear option after their latest failure."

"We could use that..." Toffee said, thoughtfully. "I mean, Meteora would be magically powerful, right?"

"I have been training her. She deserves someone kind in her life," the person sitting cross-legged on top of the table said. "Also, we both knew she was going to have to learn that spell eventually, but with the power she was born with, multiplied with the spells I've been teaching her in her dreams, well. She's unstable and dangerous. She could conquer an entire dimension with that." They grinned, sharp teeth showing.

"Then she will. That kind of magic is something Olga and Heinous would disapprove of, right?"

"Yep. If we play our cards right, she could conquer most of Mewni. Maybe not a queen with a wand, but we have other cards to play along with. I'm sure we can arrange something. She could defeat the army, definitely. And what use is a queen without their army?"

Necahua felt a fierce joy. This plan was even better than the previous one. They weren't sure if they believed in fate like their sibling, but they definitely did believe in just desserts. And this would help them so much more than any corruption of magic. It contained the best of the corruption plans and the Last Resort: Cítalaoléy restored, and even with nothing bad happening to the Mewmans. They could even wake the princess, get her to help with the current corruption in exchange for her people's souls. Just a temporary pause, to get in position, and then the Mewmans would get to wake up and see what had happened to their world. It had to work out.

It did not work out.

"Well. Star certainly believes in the inherent superiority of hereditary monarchy. I couldn't create any universe where this particular belief ends well."

"No, I'd imagine you couldn't," Toffee replied. They got up from the chair, and left the room.

Necahua watched them go. Toffee would seem emotionless to others, but this time they were not blinded enough by rage to see it. They knew their sibling. They could see the weariness in Toffee's eyes. They expected this. This plan was a pipe dream, they had all known that. But it hadn't stopped them from hoping.

"Necahua... don't do anything reckless," the first speaker said. 

"I'm not going to do anything reckless," Necahua spat out, anger and recklessness simmering beneath the surface. They could feel their back teeth grinding against each other. "I'm going to do something I should have done a long time ago."

"Una needs you," the first speaker said. "We need you. If you get hurt... they would be devastated. There's still other plans we can enact. One of them has to work eventually."

"I don't care! I don't want to make endless plans that don't work! I'm taking this into my own hands."

"Necahua... I love you, but you are young. Your plan won't work either. Maybe you need to talk with –"

"You think I'm too young to make these decisions? I've waited eight hundred years to do something, and I'm going to do it."

"So have I. But I'm not frozen at fourteen. It was a terrible injustice that you never got to grow up, but you alone can't fix that injustice."

"I don't care. I'm doing something, and you can't change my mind."

The person shook their head as Necahua flew off. "You will be okay, no matter what happens! I'll make sure of it!" they shouted after the retreating ghost. Necahua didn't hear them. They didn't need to.

Star added the finishing fixes to the throne room, hanging up a fixed painting. "Aaaand room number two of our... probably hundreds is done! We just need a throne!"

Marcie carried a freshly carved wood, marble, and blue plush throne into the room. It was very cute, a mix of the previous Mewni queens’ styles. It clashed horribly with Eclipsa's hair and dress. "So, Eclipsa, where do you want this?"

Eclipsa smiled. "On the throne plinth, of course. I don't want to be too controversial while my power is still in question."

Marcie nodded, and set the throne down. "Will you need, uh, a princess seat for Meteora?"

"Maybe later," said Eclipsa. "We don't know if she's the crown princess yet. I mean, she hasn't even tried for the wand. And..." Eclipsa glanced in the direction of Repaired Room Number One, a bedroom for Meteora to sleep in. "...I think we both want to keep it that way for a little longer. The kingdom needs to get used to her, and she... needs to have a normal, teenage life for a little while."

"And you need time with the wand to make sure you keep your power," Star noted.

"Yes, there is that, as well," Eclipsa said.

"Well. We're arranging the transfer of power pretty well," Star said. "What should we do next?"

"You and Marcie should get a day off. It's been a very tiring time for both of you," Eclipsa said. "There's only boring administrative work to do in Butterfly Castle, and Marcie has scissors. Go have fun."

"But we need to –"

"Are you implying that I can't deal with one afternoon of boring castle repairs and delegation?" Eclipsa asked.

"No no no no!" Star said, as Marcie shook her head. "We just... there's way too much to do for one person."

"I'm not alone. That's the whole point of delegation. Besides, this way you can start planning a way to find your mother."

"Oh, thank goodness," Star said. "If you're okay, I want to find her immediately. She’s in serious danger. We'll look for her right now!"

"No," Eclipsa said. "I meant planning your search for your mother. Not actually acting it out. This is a day off. You need to physically rest and recuperate. Star, your magic is coming back, but very slowly. Marcie, you just got your soul drained. Meteora's not the only one who needs rest."

Star sighed and rolled her eyes, and Marcie frowned. "Uh, is that an order, Your Majesty?"

"It is if it has to be," Eclipsa replied.

Marcie nodded, and Eclipsa retreated to talk to another Mewman about talking to another Mewman. "Okay. Let's go to my house, and start planning our search. It's not currently being repaired, and it'll be nice and normal. You can add your tower if we feel the need to nap, right? Or would that take too much magic?"

" Or I could sleep on the downstairs couch!" Star said. "I just heard that's a thing common people can do, and since I'm now a common person, I'd like to try it out."

“Right. And after that,” Marcie glanced back at Eclipsa, “we can actually start searching. From what you said, Moon could be in serious danger. We need to find her. And we will. After a good nap and a planning session, there’ll be nothing that could distract us from finding her.”

Star gasped. "Marcie! You can't say that!"

"What?"

"Now something will come up, to distract us from finding Mom! Just you wait –"

A buzz. Marcie's phone was ringing. "There we go," Star said, as Marcie got her phone out. 

"It's... Mom," Marcie said, and answered it.

"MARCIE!" Angie shouted. "The soulflowers! They're growing out of control! You need to bring Star and your ghost hunter friend and help us!"

"Well. So much for an uneventful day," Star said, elbowing Marcie.

Oh... you have no idea.

This won't be an uneventful day for anyone.

Star and Marcie got Tom and Janna. Angie hadn't been clear which ghost hunter to bring, though Janna dealt more in the occult and, oddly, magical sciences and the secrets of the multiverse. Then they cut a portal to the Diaz house, to see...

Star swore loudly. Angie had not exaggerated one bit. The soulflowers would be visible from the other end of the block. They were creeping over the house, smothering it in poisoned vines up to the roof. The Diaz parents were wearing masks and desperately trying to hack them away with a chainsaw. The Morrisons were helping with a weedwacker. But the soulflowers were easily trouncing all resistance.

Also it was raining buckets, cats, dogs, men, etc. This sucked.

"Okay, yeah, I do see why you wanted us," Tom said. "Someone's clearly angry here."

"Use your little ghost radar thing and tell me what's going on here!" Star said, as Marcie and Janna went to get the Diazes and Morrisons out of the one-sided battles they were engaged in.

"Okay... I'm detecting a whole lot of spiritual energy out there," Tom said. "Especially with the soulflowers."

Star groaned yet again. She was supposed to be done with groaning! "And how firey can you be in this rain?"

"Not very. But I wouldn't be even if it wasn't raining. I don't want to burn the house down."

"Pfft, I've done that so many times. You just give the Diazes some of your family's money –"

"Doesn't Eclipsa, you know, own that now?"

Star made a hilarious 'oh crap!' expression. "Oh yeeeeaaah... uh, let's try not to damage the house."

"Star!" Marcie shouted. "A little help?" Her and Janna's rescue attempt was not going well. Janna was wrapped in thorns, and Marcie was straining to free her, but vines were reaching for her too.

Janna didn't seem that bothered, at first. "These vines are wicked. Never seen them in person before. Angry ghosts, totally get it," she said. And then a thorn jabbed her, and she scowled. "Ow! Seriously, you idiots, what are you doing?"

"Coming!" Star ran up and tugged on the vines. When that brilliant strategy didn't work she tried to turn into her butterfly form. She managed to summon it, but when she tried to summon a spell, her magic failed. "Darn it! Tom, can't you make yourself even a little burn-ey and help?"

"Uh, I do have claws?" Tom said, though it was phrased more as a question. He ran up to the soulflowers and started slashing.

'The soulflowers, in response, shot some of their thorns at him. He yelped, and stepped back. But the soulflowers advanced towards him and grabbed him. He tried to chant the incantation that would heat up his body, but the soulflowers covered his mouth. 

Star growled. "That's it! Time for my last resort!" A funny choice of words...

Star took out a potion from her (magically enhanced) purse, and spoke the spell that would make spirits appear.

And appear they did. Several dozen ghosts were sitting and floating around the Diaz house. And in the center of them:

"Necahua? Why are you here? Why are you doing this?"

"Isn't it obvious?" they asked. "You swore to me that you'd never kill anyone like how I died. But here we are."

"But – we're friends! I know, I made a mistake, but it didn't hurt anyone permanently! Please, we can talk this out."

"No, we can't," Necahua said. "And we're not friends. You haven't tried to make up for it since it happened. I waited and waited for you to try to do something right, and well. I've seen enough. You waited until your actions caught up to you to do something. I don't see how any of that points to you being worthy of talking it out ."

"But... why now?"

"After another one of my sibling's plans to win peacefully failed, I decided to do something more direct. I'm taking things into my own hands."

"Your sibling... your sibling is Toffee?"

Necahua stared at Star. "Duh."

Star had hoped to reason with Necahua, but that was looking more like a losing battle as time went on. The other ghosts were watching, and she wasn't getting to them, either. Luckily, they weren't killing her friends or poisoning them. Yet. "But... Toffee... they don't want to win peacefully! They helped Meteora take over, they put Ludo in charge, they –"

"All necessary damage that can easily be undone. Next."

"But this isn't necessary! My friends – you're hurting them!"

"I don't care about that. Because I'm not my sibling. I don't care who gets hurt as long as you're one of them!"

A bolt of lightning struck so close Star could taste the ozone. She didn't know what to do. She wasn't going to get through to them if all they wanted to do was hurt her. "Fine. If you want to hurt me so bad, be my guest. But I'm not going to sit down and let it happen!"

She summoned her butterfly form and flew for them. Several vines came out to grab her, but she dodged them all. She was almost to Necahua –

A vine wrapped around her ankle, stopping her just before she could reach them. She strained against it, but more vines came to reinforce it, and they dragged her down into the tangle around the Diaz house. Her butterfly form blinked off.

Necahua floated in front of her, watching as she struggled, as the thorns dug into her. "Yes, by all means continue to struggle. That's definitely helping you."

Star growled, and her hand ignited. She strained, and her hand burned itself free, and she jabbed at Necahua. The ghost's face was only semi-solid, but it burned under Star's magical flame. She cut across their eyes, burning them out, hoping to burn Necahua off the physical plane.

But Necahua only laughed. "When I was alive, septarians could only regenerate limbs and tails. But things changed." Their face twitched, and grew back, ghostly flesh and eyes returning to their place. "And the dead follow the living."

Star wasn't done. She closed her eyes, and when she opened them, they and her cheekmarks were glowing. She burned away the vines covering her. Her butterfly form reformed itself in an explosion of color. Flames traced down the soulflowers, burning them away to the roots. They scorched at her friends, but they knew to get out of the blast radius as soon as possible. The ghosts scattered, knowing from experience that they couldn't stand against a truly, ugh, dipped-down Mewman princess. 

Necahua didn't move. They stood frozen, staring at Star. Then they laughed, short and bitter. "I can't believe I ever thought you were one of the good ones."

"Please, just leave. I don't want to hurt you," Star shouted.

Necahua shook their head. "No." They jumped for Star –

Star aimed her magic, and blasted Necahua away. 

The force of the blast echoed through the neighborhood, collapsing the Diaz family house and burning down the garden around her.

Star drifted down, eyes full of tears. She reached the ground and started sobbing, chest heaving and eyes red. Smoke rose up from the ground and around her as the rain faded and dropped away. Marcie, slightly singed and scorched, ran up to her. "Star! Are you okay?"

Star looked around. She had tried to leave her friends out of the blast, but they had clearly been hit. Rafael was putting out a fire in Angie's hair. Tom was clutching his stomach, eyes watering, while Janna dragged him towards an open portal. Probably to a hospital.

Star sniffled, and then started crying openly. 

"Star!" Marcie said, hugging her. "Hey, it's okay."

"I... I want my mom!" Star gasped out, every word aching. "I want my mom."

"Hey. We don't have Moon, but... we do have the next-best thing."

Star sat on the Morrison's couch, wrapped in blankets. She stared into nothing while Rafael called the local crisis line. Angie sat next to her, rubbing her back and whispering reassurances. Star had freaked out the first time Angie and Rafael had tried to speak Spanish to her, accusing them of speaking nonsense, but now the words of reassurance – todo va a estar bien and si quieres hablar, aquí estoy and lo siento, cariño – almost helped. Marcie was talking with Eclipsa, back on Mewni. Something about getting the Diazes a place to stay, and making sure Tom was okay. He had minor internal bleeding, apparently, but Janna had brought him to a good hospital and his parents were rich. He'd be fine.

Star didn't really pay attention to any of that, though. She just... sat there and stared at the wall. She kept thinking of Necahua, and how she'd made them want to hurt her so badly... and how she had kept doing the wrong thing over and over again. What was she supposed to do? What was she supposed to change? She wasn't even a princess anymore. She was just a person. How was she supposed to make anything better, especially stacked against her previous mistakes, the ones she'd made when she still had power?

How was she supposed to go on?

A portal opened, and Marcie walked out. "Okay. Apparently the palace bank is totally untouched by anything, so we can easily fund a new house. So there's that."

"Marcie?" Star asked. 

"Yeah?" Marcie said, coming up to sit by Star. 

"Could I have one of those... business cards? For the people who dissect you to make you feel better?"

"Therapists don't dissect people," Angie said gently. 

Marcie got out a card. "Here."

Star took it, and pocketed it. "Thanks."

Outside, the sun shone bright and scorching. Star could feel its warmth. It wasn't enough to warm the coldness in her heart, but it was something.

In the wreckage of the Diaz house, a portal opened and two people stepped out. One was Toffee, who clicked their claws together, making both people and the portal invisible to prying eyes. The other was the other, currently nameless, person, holding blue-tinted dimensional scissors. "Hey, anyone still there?" they said, calling to the wind in Septarian.

Ghosts, no longer present on the physical plane but visible to the two "living", drifted on the breeze towards the pair. They all looked a little guilty. Necahua, their ashes left in the rubble, came forward, trying to explain that they were the instigator of this fight, not anyone else.

The person looked at Toffee. "You want to play good cop, or should I?"

"I don't think anyone should play good cop, because I don't believe they exist," Toffee said. That earned them a laugh. Necahua tried to hesitantly join in, but was stopped by Toffee's glare. "And also because they don't deserve one right now." They took a breath, and Necahua prepared themself for a world-class berating. "I cannot believe you. You would put yourselves in jeopardy, put everyone and everything in jeopardy, and for what? To get back for a petty slight like breaking a promise?"

"She promised me she wouldn't hurt anyone how they killed me!" Necahua protested. "That's not petty!"

"And so what? The only person affected by her magic was me, and I was willing to forgive her if she cleaned up her act. Which she may yet still attempt to, and you will go along with that should it happen. I don't expect you to like it, but I do expect you to accept it."

"But –"

"No buts!" the other person said. Toffee said something significantly worse.

Toffee continued. "You know what happens to people who go against the Butterfly queens directly. I think my past military failures have illustrated that quite plainly. So, even if you were totally justified in pulling this stunt, why in Nahualquizqui's holy name would you choose to directly threaten her and her friends, instead of, I don't know, killing them in their sleep ?"

"I... I wanted..."

"Yes, I know, you wanted her to know what was going on, and you wanted her to suffer, and a million other reasons besides the clear fact that you were so unflinchingly angry, and anger makes you incredibly reckless and incredibly stupid ." Toffee sighed. "Necahua, I really do love you, but I am going to remove you from all commanding positions from now on."

"But you need me!"

Toffee snorted. "You're a captain, Neca. Sorry, but you've never been critical to our cause."

Necahua deflated. "I..."

The person beside Toffee shook their head. "Kiddo, you may be strong and charismatic, which is always a good trait for a leader, but boy oh boy are you reckless. Especially when you feel you've been slighted. If our plan is ever going to get off the ground, you're going to have to set that aside, or you're going to have to be benched."

Necahua rolled their eyes. "Yeah, another stupid plan that's not going to work at all."

The person laughed. "You're one to talk. But I think we've failed enough that we've fine-tuned the process. And this plan is special."

Necahua snorted. "Yeah? How?"

Toffee looked away. "How indeed," they muttered.

"It's already succeeded." The person laughed. "The magic realm has been corrupted beyond what they can ignore, and there's nothing they can do to heal it. And I mean nothing . It would take more knowledge than they could handle. I can't wait to see the Butterflys tear their own dynasty apart."

...

Chapter Text

As soon as they were able after That Happened, Star and Marcie pulled each other together and went back to Butterfly Castle, where Eclipsa was teaching a group of monsters about navigating the tunnels beneath Butterfly Castle. "Remember, the tunnels respond to unflinching intent. Who is the stubbornest, most focused member of your team?"

All the assembled monsters pointed to a small deer monster.

"Very well, let's –"

"Hey, Eclipsa!" Star shouted. "We're here!"

"What – oh, hello Star and Marcie. How are you holding up?"

"Well enough," Marcie said. "We were thinking about how to find Moon, and I think we'll need your help. I've been studying chemical burns, and we really need to move as soon as possible."

Eclipsa blinked. "Oh, yes? Let me just finish up here, and we'll do whatever you need."

"No need for that, my queen!" Glossaryck said, appearing from nowhere like a particularly unpleasant mirage. "We're all going to the same place."

"What?" Eclipsa asked. "Why are you here?"

"We'll be joining the expedition to the Monster Temple to free your husband!" Glossaryck said. "No stronger will than one who can literally reshape their brain! And Star and Eclipsa, you'll come with me, because I have something to do with all of you! Marcie, you can do whatever you want. You're not important."

"Dude," Marcie said. "Rude, and I need to find Moon. Can't you help?"

"Hey, I'm just telling it like it is," Glossaryck said. Horrible creature. Marcie's very important! I know you mean to the current plot, but she was half the reason Meteora was defeated and your favorite little queen was placed on the throne. Without her, Tom never would've burned out Meteora's first eye. And she's critical for this plot, too.

"I'm coming with Star," Marcie said, crossing her arms.

"Fine, fine, whatever," Glossaryck said. "Let's go, we're wasting daylight."

They went, all confused at Glossaryck's... deal, and Star discussed her plan with Eclipsa. "We're going to use the All-Seeing Eye. Mom will definitely show up there. Hopefully Mom will be able to tell us where she is, but if she can't, I can just jump through the Eye like I did back in the Realm of Magic."

"'Jump through the Eye?'" Eclipsa asked. "That's not how the spell was designed."

"Yeah, but I'm pretty cool," Star said. "I just... I put my hand through, and Marcie grabbed it, and I went through the All-Seeing Eye."

"Well, I'd love to see that," Eclipsa said. "Let's hope there are recognizable landmarks around her, though."

Star nodded. "I guess."

They soon rose up and out of the tunnels, and into the mountain shaped like a septarian's open jaws. They emerged into the large room Globgor was imprisoned in.

"Wow," Star said, looking very far up at his face. "He's big."

"He's a sizeshifter, so he isn't always that big," Eclipsa responded. "He was with me and my daughter when the Mewmans attacked. Rhombulus got him first, but he tried to become too big to crystalize safely. He was not successful," Eclipsa said with a restrained weariness. "But he clearly wasn't small enough to move, so here he has stayed, while my crystal was moved to a more secure location."

Star nodded. "Okay. What do we do to get him out?"

"I don't know. My mother had a crystal-shattering spell for Rhombulus hitting the wrong target on the battlefield, but I never memorized it, and the old book is gone now. But surely we could replicate it somehow... the problem is, I don't want to hurt Globgor."

"Has Rhombulus said anything yet?" Star asked. "That would be one way for him to undo the harm he's caused."

"Not yet, no. His soul is restored, but he hasn't been very responsive to my questions. But, well, his sister has been badly hurt. I'll pry later. For now I'll work on it by myself, with people I can more easily trust."

Star nodded. "Okay. And... I hate to... uh... and the All-Seeing Eye spell?"

"Right," Eclipsa said. She took out the wand, and almost sang the chant. "I summon the All-Seeing Eye. To tear a hole into the sky. Reveal to me that which is hidden. Unveil to me what is forbidden!"

The All-Seeing Eye opened, showing Moon standing... in an all-encompassing darkness. It appeared to be a cave of some sort. No landmarks to be seen.

"Marcie, get over here. Do you recognize this place?" Star asked.

Marcie walked up and took a good look at the All-Seeing Eye. "I can't recognize anything. But she looks... she looks really messed up."

She did. She was standing straight and rigid, and staring into the darkness. Her mewberty wings were tattered, but that was hardly the worst of it. She was standing straight on badly burned legs, and her hands were burnt as well. Her face, though, was the worst: the burn remained, and muscle and teeth were showing. It was also looking a little infected, with puffy redness around the wound. The only blessing was that the purple magic seemed to be gone. 

Star nodded. "There was this weird darkness in the Realm of Magic. But she's out of it, she should be better now!"

Marcie shook her head. "Wounds that bad don't just heal themselves, magic or not. We need to find her, and fast."

Star nodded. She reached forward and touched the All-Seeing Eye.

A flash of red, and everyone was slammed backwards as the All-Seeing Eye collapsed.

Star groaned and got up. "What was that?"

"You're low on magic. Or, at a normal magic-user's power. You can't manipulate spells like that anymore," Eclipsa said. Before Star could say anything, she added: "You'll get better. But not in time."

"I wouldn't worry about it," Glossaryck said. "Right now we need to focus on your spellcasting without a wand. Marcie can do the work of running around looking for Moon with no actual ability to find her. We're gonna do something cooler. Today, you're gonna learn how to use magic without a wand! Consistently, I mean. You've done it before when you really need to, but now you'll be able to do it on command."

"And I'm going to use it to find my mom, right Glossaryck ?" Star replied through gritted teeth.

"Sure, sure, whatever," Glossaryck said. "Let's find our own spot. Eclipsa, you do your thing, and Marcie, you go find Moon. Or not."

"If you're so smart, where is Moon?" Marcie growled.

Glossaryck shrugged, turned towards Marcie, and made a dismissive gesture, waving his talon to the left. "Around."

Marcie let out a frustrated sigh, rolled her eyes, and got out her dimensional scissors. She tried to cut open a portal, but nothing happened. "Right, these mountains are weird." She headed back for the tunnels. "My will to prove Glossaryck wrong is sharp! Don't worry about me."

Everyone stood still for a moment, then shrugged and went their separate ways.

"You're probably wondering why I brought you here," Marcie said, staring everyone down and leaning on Nachos. 

"Yeah, kind of," Hekapoo, just released from her medical bed, said. Tom – also just released from the hospital, Kelly, Talon, Janna, and Jorby made noises of agreement.

"You're some of the strongest, smartest people I know. Well, except for Talon. More importantly, you all have dimensional scissors, or other ways of traveling between dimensions. Because we're going on a hunt through the entire multiverse, and we're going to have to do it together. We're looking for Moon Butterfly."

"Oh, so she can take over from Eclipsa?" Hekapoo asked. "We do need a good queen around here."

"No, because she's in danger and we need to save her as soon as possible," Marcie said. "Because she's a person in need of saving, not because she's going to make our lives any better or worse."

Hekapoo snorted, but didn't say anything.

"Anyways, I'm calling us the Marcienificent Seven! We're going to find Moon, and we're going to bring her home."

A cough, from Jorby. Talon blinked. Even Tom looked uncomfortable.

"What?"

"That's... a really stupid name, bro." Talon said.

"I have heard stupider!" Marcie said, grandiosely. Then: "Also, I've already named the group chat."

A few understanding murmurs. "Yeah, that makes sense. Can't change the name of a group chat."

"Hekapoo, can you still clone yourself, or will you get hurt?"

Hekapoo nodded. "I experimented, like you said, and I can clone myself pretty well now that I've rested. But I won't try to clone myself that fast again."

"With any luck, you won't need to," Marcie said. She pulled out her phone. "This is what the All-Seeing Eye showed us."

The group chat looked at it. "That looks like a cave," Hekapoo said. "Or a really unfinished basement."

"Yeah, that's what we thought," Marcie said. "Anyways, let's divide and conquer and visit all the unfinished basements and caves we know about in the multiverse!"

The group cheered and high-fived each other, and then opened their respective portals.

Star sat next to Glossaryck in a room just next to the big room where Eclipsa and the monsters were trying to free Globgor. "Okay. Since we're doing this, how will dipping down help my mother?"

Glossaryck shrugged. "You know. It's important you know how to do this," he said, which was extremely vague, unhelpful, and annoying. "We start with your butterfly form. Turn into a butterfly."

Star closed her eyes and breathed in deeply. Her butterfly form flickered in and out... and in again. She opened her eyes, and she had four extra arms. "Aw yeah!"

"Okay. But we want you to be able to do magic when you're not using the butterfly form," Glossaryck said. Well, gee, Glossaryck, why did you –

"Ugh, I know! What was the point of telling me to use this form if you don't want me to use it at all?" Star, I was just about to say that. Stop interrupting me.

Glossaryck shrugged again. "You know. To prove you could do it." Which is so unhelpful and annoying. Glossaryck is just making her do random stuff now.

Star groaned, and poofed out of her butterfly form. "If you are going to waste my time with stupid little things like this, then at least tell me how to make a locator spell. I usually just feel out my spells, but I need a concrete thing to do."

"Nah, don't worry about that," Glossaryck said. "As I said, you need to learn to use magic without a wand, and without your butterfly form. There's plenty of times you'll need to do a spell without terrifying everyone around you or drawing attention to yourself. Like now."

"Why would I not want to draw attention to myself right now? I'm literally practicing magic right now, and everyone knows it!"

"Right, sorry. There are plenty of times you'll need to do a spell without terrifying everyone around you –"

"I know ," Star growled. 

Glossaryck coughed. "–Or drawing attention to yourself. Like we're pretending to do now."

Star rolled her eyes. 'Okay fine," she whispered. "We're super secret spies. Let's get this over with."

Glossaryck snorted. 'You'll never beat Toffee with that attitude."

"Maybe I don't want to beat Toffee, huh?" Star whisper-shouted. "I don't care about that! I'm not a princess anymore! Destiny over! And maybe that's a good thing."

Glossaryck chuckled. "Your destiny isn't over just because you're not a princess anymore. On the contrary, I think it's just begun. Your greatest choice and struggles are still far ahead of you."

Star rolled her eyes. "Sure. Just teach me."

"Okay," Glossaryck said. "You've just got to... harness your emotions!"

"Yeah? Well, I'm feeling very frustrated right about now!"

"You reach deep inside yourself, and feel your emotions, and use them."

Star tried to reach inside herself, but her ears just buzzed. "Glossaryck, this isn't working ! You used to be such a good teacher, what happened?"

"Star. Star. Star, Maybe what isn't working is your attitude. Have you considered that?"

Star stared at him. Then she got up, turned, walked to the wall, and screamed at it.

Marcie went to all the caves she'd ever heard of that weren't in the Neverzone, which Hekapoo was covering. She opened a portal to the World's Coziest Prehistoric Dwelling, but when she glanced through, all that remained of it was blue yarn. She quickly closed the portal after that.

She then went to many different caves she'd heard of on Earth. There was Hang Sơn Đoòng in Southeast Asia, and Mammoth Cave in Eastern America, and many Pacific lava tubes. Nothing. 

After fruitlessly searching Fingal's Cave in West Asia, she took a break and thought through her current evidence. She was going about this the wrong way. What had Glossaryck... had made that gesture towards...

Oh , she realized. "Oh!" she said out loud. She sent a text to the Marcienificent Seven, saying that she had a lead but to continue searching. Then she headed for the tunnels again.

She emerged, and walked into Globgor's room. She tried to map out the room in her head, and where Glossaryck had been floating. She frowned. She couldn't remember if Glossaryck had been facing left or right.

A sudden scream made her jump, and she followed its source to a room right off the cave. "Star?" she asked, looking in the room.

Star turned away from the wall, towards Marcie. "Marcie! Have you found Mom?" she asked, voice extremely hoarse. She'd been doing this for a while now.

"No," Marcie said. "But I think I know someone who knows where she is," Marcie replied. She walked up to Glossaryck. "Which wall did you do that dismissive gesture at?"

"Oh, the north wall. The wall pointing north," Glossaryck replied, pointing.

"Okay. We need to bust that wall down," Marcie said.

"On it!" Star said, running out of the antechamber. She summoned her anger and desperation. Her hands glowed and blasted the north wall down.

"Star! What's going o –" Eclipsa gasped.

Behind the wall was a featureless cave, empty except for Moon Butterfly, standing stock still and staring into the darkness. Star ran up to her and hugged her.

Moon gasped, and struggled. "Ow! You're – you're hurting me!"

Star let go immediately. "Mom! You're here! You're really here!"

Moon stared at her. They made a second of eye contact, until, trance broken, Moon fainted from the pain. Star knelt beside her. "We need to get her to the hospital wing!"

"Levitato!" Eclipsa shouted, lifting Moon in a beam of purple energy.

Star and Eclipsa hurried out. Marcie didn't follow them, and encouraged the other workers to do the same. They shouldn't crowd Moon, and let the trio get to the hospital. Instead she texted the Marcienificent Seven, not noticing that the text hadn't sent, and looked at the crystal. There was nothing she could do to help Moon, but she could make sure things were going okay here without Eclipsa.

Glossaryck, however, looked upset. "They didn't even say thank you!"

I am playing the multiverse's smallest violin. It is very high-pitched, enough to make a dog's ears bleed. Truly such a tragic experience.

"Serves you right," Marcie said, walking past him.

Moon did not wake up for weeks. In that time, Butterfly Castle was restored, and an agreement was made that Star would do her best to aid in Eclipsa's transition, and Moon would hopefully help once she was awake. Star thought Eclipsa was proving to be a reasonably decent queen; while the Mewmans hated her on principle, at Star's behest she did her best not to rock the boat, and so her only need was PR, which the former princess and especially the former queen could help with.

Marcie took over trying to open Globgor's crystal while Eclipsa led, though that mostly consisted of fruitlessly trying to cajole Rhombulus into opening the crystal or at least provide them samples to test Eclipsa's new spells on. When she was done with that, she could always take out her frustrations on Globgor's crystal, equally fruitlessly. Physical force didn't seem to work on the crystals at all; not even Marcie's punches could shatter it.

Tom and Hekapoo fully healed, and while there was no regrowing Hekapoo's horn, they ended up as healthy as the doctors could make them.

Star spent as much time as possible by her mother's side, sometimes reading, or playing games, or, most often, just sitting there waiting for her to wake up. Moon received top-notch medical care from both Earth and Mewni's finest doctors, and though she would have many scars and it was likely she'd never be able to use the burned side of her face again, the infections and wear were easily healed.

All that remained was for her to wake up. She had to.

And one day, while Star was rereading Marcie's now-filled mystery book, Moon opened her eyes and groaned.

Star immediately threw the book aside. Quite literally. "Mom! It's me!"

Moon smiled, tears welling in her eyes. "Hello, Star."

We found Mom, and... she's not doing good, but she's doing okay. And that has to count.

Chapter Text

Nearly as soon as Moon woke up, doctors rushed over to her like a swarm of bees on a flower, taking her vitals and quizzing her on her symptoms.

"Hey, guys, one at a time!" Star said. "Don't crowd her!"

"Oh, Star, you little mother bird," Moon said, smiling with one half of her face. Her voice was slightly slurred and very hoarse. "Don't worry, I am perfectly capable of answering the doctor's questions. They're only here to worry about my health, after all."

Star nodded, and sat back a little, fidgeting in her chair. Despite that, or perhaps because of it, she paid attention to what the doctors were saying.

"So there's no feeling in the place where the burn occurred, right?" one of the doctors said. 

"No, no feeling whatsoever. But considering that I splashed the stuff in my face, a little cosmetic damage is a small price to pay."

"Good to see you're optimistic," a psychologist said. "We'll reintroduce you to the world gradually. A lot has changed. I'm not allowed to dissect people anymore."

"You weren't allowed to dissect people before everything changed," the first doctor, who wasn't actually a doctor but an intern, Intern Ventblatley, said. "Apparently only surgeons are allowed to dissect people now."

Somewhere else, Marcie looked up from stealing crystal donuts from Rhombulus's dimension. "I feel a disturbance in the force... like someone is confusing dissection with legitimate medical practice yet again."

"Tell me about it," said Toffee, from another somewhere else where they were getting Dimitri off the roof again.

"For Forces' sake, that's why you two are interns!" said a third doctor, who was the actual attending physician. Marcie and Toffee breathed a sigh of relief and went back to their respective engaging capers. "We're going to be dependent on Earth doctors for all our medical care for forever if you keep thinking dissection is legitimate as anything other than teaching. Surgeons perform surgery , not dissections. Dissections are an entirely different thing!"

"I think they should be allowed to perform dissections if they want to," muttered the psychologist. 

"They are –"

"Ah, this is all well and good," Moon said, looking at the arguing medical professionals, "but I'd like to know when I'm allowed to leave. I don't feel up to it for now, but I would like to eventually see these new changes for myself. And I'd like to know when I can hug my daughter again."

Star smiled.

"Well, it will be a while," the physician said, taking her blood pressure on an unburnt stretch of arm. "You have a lot of procedures to still undergo. We've already given you as many skin grafts as we can safely give, but we may need to give more once you recover more from your burns. Your legs were badly burnt, so you won't be walking with them much. We can put you in a wheelchair after a while, when you're ready for anything but bedrest. Honestly, it's a good thing you were wearing armor. This could've been a lot worse."

Moon nodded. "Okay. But I do want to know what's going on. You said something changed. And what happened with Meteora?"

"Uh – I'll tell you after the doctor's know you're okay!" Star said. "You guys should do your jobs first."

The doctors glanced at each other and nodded. "Okay, Your – ma'am," Ventblatley said. "Now, uh, Ms. Butterfly, you've suffered serious chemical burns. What do you think caused them? Star found you in the tunnels, and that's a very dangerous place."

Star glanced at Moon. Right. The weird purple magic. She had barely even thought about that.

Moon looked away. "Ah... I don't remember," she said.

Star went along with that, and nodded. "Sure. No idea what happened."

The doctors continued their check-up and monitoring and inquisition, but Star didn't really pay attention beyond the necessary knowledge that Moon would get better. After the doctors had finished their checkups and affirmed that Moon would be okay, Star turned to Moon. "What was that deal with not telling the doctors about the dark magic?"

"I don't tell anyone about dark magic, Star," Moon said. "Just the knowledge of it is dangerous. If I explained where it came from, I would have to explain things I cannot and will not explain."

"What, like how you got it? It was Eclipsa, no big deal. She's cool now."

"No, the fact that we can destroy septarians." 

"What? That's not a big deal."

"Except it is, and I'll have to explain why I didn't use it so many times when I could have. Most Mewmans aren't like you, Star. They'd want me to have used it against as many septarians as possible, until I drew out the Forces of Evil and used it on them. And maybe they'd want me to continue after that."

"Oh," Star said. "Most Mewmans... why didn't you want that too?"

"What?"

"You always told me to listen to people. Your advisors, at least. If most Mewmans wanted you to use it against septarians, why didn't you?"

"Well, I'd risk freeing Eclipsa. I did not know at the time that that would be less disastrous than expected."

"You'd risk freeing Eclipsa if you killed the Forces of Evil," Star noted. "But every single other septarian in existence, you wouldn't do anything you saw as bad by killing the rest."

"I'm surprised you have so little faith in me," Moon said.

"Oh! No, Mom, I think you're great! You totally wouldn't –"

"Yes, I would. Especially in my rash and firey younger days. And... well, I started to do that."

"You did?!" Star gasped. "Mom, that's – if you did that, why are there any septarians left?"

"Well... that is a long story," Moon said. "Let's trade a story for a story. If you tell me what has happened in my absence, I will tell you why I didn't drive septarians to extinction."

"Okay," Star said, and began her tale. She explained almost everything that had happened since Moon had been gone. Meteora, the dwindling army, Toffee's plan, and Star ending the fight by giving the wand and throne to Eclipsa. The one thing she did not say anything about was Necahua, only alluding towards an accident at the Diaz house. She didn't know how to begin with that one.

Moon nodded along, and seemed surprisingly okay with Star's decisions. "You're not... mad?" Star asked, when she had finished her story.

"No. I understand why you made the choices you did. And, honestly, I can't think of a better way you could have ended the conflict. With Toffee decimating the army... that wicked lizard. I don't care how much I've healed, if I ever saw them face-to-face again, I would end them in a heartbeat."

After another one of my sibling's plans to win peacefully failed, I decided to do something on my own.

All necessary damage that can easily be undone.

Because I'm not my sibling. I don't care who gets hurt as long as you're one of them!

Star didn't know what to think of Toffee. They were evil. They had to be. The alternative was... not something Star would or could entertain. Toffee was cold, and clearly thought the ends justified the means. Maybe they were only fighting for a better world, but Star knew they were doing it in the wrong way. They were evil. They had to be.

"Yeah... I'd help. But I don't think they'll let us fight them face-to-face."

"You're right, unfortunately," Moon said, resigned. "They always do know how to pick the battleground. And I imagine they've only gotten worse after you so soundly defeated them last time they fought directly."

Star nodded, looked away, and then looked back at Moon. "But... what was the reason you stopped using the dark magic? You said you would tell me."

Moon nodded. "Right. That story involves Toffee too. Even after I had driven away their monster army, Toffee still unsettled me. They hadn't seemed disturbed to see their soldiers flee whatsoever. They just seemed serene and calm while I injured them permanently. And one of their monsters hadn't run away. That green and purple lizard man, he'd just stood there and glared at me. Really, it seemed to be another cog in some galling, all-consuming plan. I didn't want to just stand there and watch them do whatever it was they were planning, I wanted to shake them up. And I did."

"Wow, you surprised Toffee? Nice one," Star said. Took one to know one, of course. She offered a fist bump. Moon did not reciprocate, as the doctors had recommended she move as little as possible, especially her fragile arms. Star, understanding this, acted as if Moon had reciprocated, making little explosion noises. 

But Moon, far from exasperatedly smiling at her daughter's antics, frowned. "Yes. But... it was at too high a cost."

Here is what happened. Moon, hopped up on a desire for revenge and wiping off Toffee's completely imagined smug face, decided to do something to stop them. So she gathered the Magic High Commission, even roping Glossaryck into a "super-stealth team."

The plan was simple: find the Forces of Evil's... valet, trap, and eliminate him. And... capture, just capture the Forces of Evil and throw them in the darkest depths of the dungeon. Easy enough. And after a few weeks of solid detective work (mostly begging Glossaryck for information), they finally found that he frequented the tunnels surprisingly close to Butterfly Castle, near an old Septarian graveyard. He and the Forces of Evil were often there together, but every once and a while they would separate, and the Forces of Evil would go further into the tunnels. And Glossaryck said that they could catch him alone if they booked it right... about... now .

Moon's intent to hurt and kill was strong, so she led the group. The Forces of Evil took away the one person she cared about most, and she wanted to begin to bridge that gap. She wasn't expecting this action to satiate her desire for revenge, because there was no way the Forces of Evil could feel anywhere near the amount of love she had felt towards her mother, but it would be a good start.

The thing about intent, is that literally anyone can feel it. There was something else at play, another criteria for the tunnels, but it didn't matter. Moon, unfortunately, fit both criteria. And the tunnels listened.

The group advanced through the tunnels, cloaked by an invisibility spell, and after some time found their target, in a large cave with another tunnel at the end. Rhombulus fired his crystal spell, encasing Rasticore up to the shoulder. The High Commission filed around the crystal as Rasticore recovered from his surprise quickly and glared at them all. 

Moon aimed her wand. Rasticore glared at her most. Moon had seen that look before, and this time she relished it.

"What exactly do you want?" he asked, as if he wasn't trapped and facing down her wand. "I'm not going to give you anything that would hurt us, princess ."

"Queen," Moon replied. "Your friend made sure of that."

Rasticore snorted, dismissive. Was he laughing at her mother's death? She'd make sure he never laughed again. 

Figuring she'd waited long enough for a substantial response, she continued. "I don't want information, or spells, or weapons. I want you dead, and I want the Forces of Evil to know my wrath is swift and just."

Rasticore raised an eyebrow. "Interesting choice of words there."

Moon scoffed. "Well, I can't kill them! So I'm doing the next best option."

"Interesting... even killing your mother's killer isn't as important as keeping the race traitor imprisoned. I think you have your priorities messed up, Your Highness."

"Your death and their imprisonment is good enough for me," Moon said, pointing her wand in his face. 

"Killing either of us won't bring your mother back. In fact, I think it'd do the opposite."

Moon frowned. She dismissed the creeping thought that that was a very strange thing to say, that killing Rasticore would do the opposite of bringing Comet back. He was clearly making things up to save his own hide. She focused on her rage, and spoke the words to the Darkest Spell.

Rasticore just stared at her as she covered her wand in darkness, and blasted through the crystal, destroying his heart.

She had aimed for his heart, but her spell had come out stronger than she'd expected, strengthened with the force of her rage, and a good portion of his left side was taken by the spell, including his left arm. They faded away, into the darkness of the wand.

As they faded and Rasticore's breathing became erratic, Moon ordered Rhombulus to let him go. He fell to the floor, all energy devoted to using his septarian healing to try, try and fail to keep blood circulating through his body. Moon watched him slip in and out of consciousness, certain death awaiting. She smiled. 

Until a thorny vine stabbed straight through her arm, piercing the nerve and forcing her to drop the wand. The wand – ! She gasped as it clattered to the floor. She grabbed for it with her uninjured arm, but the same vine that had injured her ripped out of her arm, wrapped itself around the wand, and snatched it away.

And there, standing at the end of the cave, was Toffee. They were holding their crystal-tipped spear that glowed enough in any light to hurt Moon's eyes. And their face was as cold and implacable as a tree well in a spot you thought was safe. They did not share their sibling's tendency for hot burning anger. They had trained too hard for that. Their anger was the end of the universe: a cold, emotionless heat death. And their cold fury was apparent to everyone in the room.

Moon had expected them to show up eventually, but she hadn't expected them to incapacitate her by stealing her wand. Clearly , she thought, they don't care enough about him for the shock to dull their wits . (She was absolutely wrong in them not caring. But no, they never allowed anger to cloud their wits. It was not their nature. I'm very proud of them.)

But there was a reason she had brought reinforcements. "Capture them!" she shouted to the High Commission.

And then many things happened at once. A feeling of dread crept into the minds of the High Commission, like soft screams in the distance. Soulflowers started growing up from the ground, the walls, the ceiling, growing into sharp, poisonous, grasping hazards. Rhombulus, the fastest among them, blasted a crystallization beam at Toffee. But before it could hit, Toffee vanished.

The screaming grew louder.

The crystallization beam hit the far wall, creating a hard, sharp spur of rock. And then a shield wall appeared, and slammed into Rhombulus, dragging him across the soulflowers and straight into his own sharp crystal. His crystal head cracked. Lekmet ran to him.

The screaming grew louder. 

Hekapoo and Omni both tried to find Toffee, but they had completely disappeared. Hekapoo summoned an army of clones to search, but a gust of cold air blew out all their flames, and then a soulflower vine wrapped around her horns and legs, immobilizing her. Omnitraxus made portals to let zir massive paws through, to swipe around the room to find Toffee, but an explosion rocked the room, zir crystal ball at the center of it. Goodbye Omnitraxus. 

The screaming grew louder.

Moon was knocked onto her side by the explosion, not to mention the stab would in her hand, but she could still fight! She tried to reach for a soulflower thorn, to tear it off and use until she could find her wand – where was her wand? – but she found she couldn't move. Some strange metal was holding her in place, like a net. Impossibly thin wires dug into her as she tried to get up. But she only ended up even more trapped.

The screaming grew louder.

Toffee faded back into existence next to Rasticore, looking warily at Glossaryck. Glossaryck just shook his head. Toffee immediately turned to Rasticore. All the cold anger melted off their face, replaced with fear and concern, and they left their spear beside them. "Rasticore! Rasticore, can you hear me?" they asked in Septarian.

Rasticore didn't respond, so they muttered a spell and oxygen returned to his brain, temporarily. He woke up and looked around. "Whoa... did you just..."

"What?" Toffee asked.

"That's cool... you beat the High Commission for me... almost like you like me around..."

"Rasticore we've been together for centuries," Toffee said, assessing the wound. Cauterized, like my wound, good, though it'll hurt a lot, they thought distractedly.

"But you're so cool..."

Toffee glanced at their spear. "I had help. Which is why I know I will heal you. You're going to be okay."

Rasticore reached up with his right arm and brushed some of Toffee's long fur out of their face. "Hey. It'll be fine. At least this way I won't have to live without you."

Toffee shook their head. "No, I'm going to heal you. You're going to be fine. I – I can't lose you too." They touched the edges of Rasticore's wound. And focused.

"It's dark magic, dear heart. Not even you can heal that," Rasticore replied, glancing at Toffee's four-fingered hand. His vision was getting blurry again.

Toffee shook their head. "No. The Butterflys have pulled magic out of thin air before, why shouldn't I be able to?" Their voice kept breaking. There were tears and sparks of green in the edges of their eyes. 

Moon looked on in surprise. She couldn't understand the Septarian. They had the High Commission all trapped or deactivated, why weren't they finishing their job? Wouldn't they want to get rid of the princess, too? What was happening?

"It'll be okay," Rasticore said. "You don't have to do the impossible."

"Yes, I DO!" At the last word, their eyes and cheekmarks glowed, and their voice echoed around the cave. For a moment, Moon saw them as something... more.

The soulflower vine that held the wand came forward, and Toffee touched one finger to its crystal. They said something , Moon couldn't under – couldn't make it out. That was the reason she couldn't comprehend it, it was just too unintelligible. Not – not anything else. (She ignored that they had been speaking in Septarian, and she could at least comprehend that as sounds.) A small thread of gold magic appeared on the edge of the crystal. They grabbed the thread, ignoring how it burned their skin, and pulled .

They pulled hard, and more and more thread came out. They laid the string where Rasticore's heart should have been. It didn't just lay there, but attached to the edges of Rasticore's wound and started weaving new flesh and bone and heart.

Toffee kept like that for a while, but the work was clearly draining them. Their breath quickened, exhaustion plain on their face. And despite their healing powers, the burns from the thread were clearly getting to them. After his heart had been restored, Rasticore reached up to them. "Hey. You're hurting yourself. I'm okay. You don't need to do this anymore."

Toffee looked at him. "But... your arm... and I haven't finished your lung, and –"

"You're literally a biomechanical genius," Rasticore said. "I trust you to give me the coolest prosthetics out there. With all sorts of cool gadgets and stuff."

Toffee nodded, and dropped the wand. It hit the still vine-covered stone ground with a muffled clatter. "Very well."

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to pass out now," Rasticore said. He did so.

"Chét, I wanted to pass out first," Toffee said, laughing mostly from relief. They picked up their spear, and placed it on their back, where it morphed slightly to cling there. Then they lifted Rasticore in a bridal carry. Rhombulus, healed by Lekmet, ran for them, charging his hands. Toffee summoned a bent shield without even looking, and the crystal beam ricocheted back at Rhombulus, encasing him in crystal.

Toffee stopped at the end of the cave. "One more thing," they said in Mewman, turning to Moon. "That spell you used is a heinous crime against the entire multiverse." They tapped the tip of the spear and it glowed an even more glaring white than before. "ⳤ⬗⧜⫇◙◡Ⳁ⬲ⲟⶰ⇠⚕┴⏚⨓⼐ⶑₚ▏⍛⦘⪻⎬⟽"

Moon didn't understand their spell. She wasn't sure she was capable of understanding it. She wasn't even sure Toffee knew she couldn't understand it, they just shot her a meaningful glance. The spear dimmed, and a piece of it seemed to be missing. And the spell clearly worked.

And Moon recognized a spell when she saw one. She may not have known what Toffee did, but she knew she couldn't use the Darkest Spell again. She gulped, and focused. She had seen her mother use magic without her wand, couldn't she? She had to stop them. They were getting away. All her plans were falling apart –

And then her eyes glowed blue, and the wand came to her, and she freed herself and ran at Toffee –

And they were already gone.

She blinked, and growled in frustration, then went to free the Magic High Commission. Lekmet was tending to Omnitraxus, and Moon used the wand to free Hekapoo. The soulflower vines protested, but without their grower nearby, they gave way quickly. Then she turned on Glossaryck. "Why didn't you stop them?!"

Glossaryck shrugged. "I don't think that would have worked out well for anyone."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Moon asked angrily.

"It means that stopping Toffee from healing their lover would not have worked out well for either side."

"Oh cut the crap! We both know that making them fear me would stop them from crossing me. And there's no way Toffee can love."

"On the contrary, it would have made them even more dangerous. They have a vendetta against Mewmanity, that is true, but they do not have a vendetta against you specifically. Don't give them a reason to go after you.

"As for them not being able to love... I think today illustrates that they definitely can."

Speaking of people who definitely cannot love, Glossaryck used Levitato to lift Rhombulus's crystal in the air. "Come on. I hate these tunnels, let's get out of here."

Moon shook herself, glanced at the rest of the High Commission, and followed Glossaryck.

Moon told the same story I did, but less. She didn't understand Septarian, for one, but she also couldn't recall all the details of the conversations like I can, and she was definitely biased. She did say that it was a stupid, reckless plan, but she didn't condemn the idea behind it the way I have.

"So... you don't use the darkest spell because you don't know what it will do to you now that Toffee's cursed it," Star said. She hadn't expected to feel so... disappointed.

"That and it clearly can be reversed," Moon said. "With great effort on Toffee's part, but it is clearly not as simple as blasting a lizard and then everything being over. But also... I did use the spell again. Once. When Toffee nearly killed you, I threw all my reservations away and tried to kill them with it. And when magic returned, my arms exploded in agony. I ignored it, I had to find Eclipsa, but... they did do something. And my use of the spell was ineffective. Magic was dead, so nothing happened to my target. Who knows what it would do if I actually hurt someone with it."

"Huh," Star said. "Are you okay now?"

Moon snorted. "Not currently, but not because of that. The pain faded after a while."

"Huh," Star said again. She wasn't sure how to process all of this. What would Marcie ask? "Gosh... uh..." She looked at Moon, at how sunken her eyes were and how she was struggling to stay awake. Moon was always well put-together; she never normally showed how exhausted she was. "You look tired, Mom. You want to get some rest?"

Moon nodded. "Thank you, Star."

Star nodded back and closed the curtain around Moon's bed. She left the hospital wing, passing her father, who had apparently only just been notified that Moon woke up, and called Marcie. The signal didn't go through.

"Dang it, Marcie, pick up!" she muttered. "I got so much to tell you."

So Marcie's not picking up, but we got a serious lore dump. I have so many important things to tell her! Why isn't she picking up?

Chapter Text

Marcie frowned theatrically at a box of crystal donuts. She had tried for weeks to free Globgor through conventional means – the magic-less monsters behind her fruitlessly hitting the crystal with pickaxes were proof – but now, now she had something to test on. And, in the alcove tucked away from the main Globgor-filled cave, she had plenty of free space to not get hit by stray spell bits. "Alright, Eclipsa, let's experiment. How do you create spells?"

Eclipsa shrugged. "I can't explain it. It comes... naturally. Like the universe is calling me to do something, and I do it. It's not something I can control. Sometimes it can be directed... my mother was very good at making spells do whatever she wanted, for example. But mostly it's just... doing something, and your magic interprets it as a spell. To actually be able to tell magic what you want to do, and have it listen... that requires both total knowledge of magic and powerful internal magic. When one dips down fully, cheekmarks glowing and all, it's a little more possible, but it's still quite difficult."

"Hmm..." Marcie said. "Any way magic would interpret your need to free your husband?"

Eclipsa shook her head. "I don't think so. One thing about magic is that it gets frustrated by reinventing the wheel. So there's never really two ways to do the same thing, if that makes sense. My mother created one way to break crystals..."

"...so it's not going to let you create another," Marcie finished.

"I'm afraid not," Eclipsa sighed. "And the Old Book is destroyed, so there's no way of learning that spell."

Marcie and Eclipsa were quiet for a moment. Then Marcie shook herself out and shrugged. "Well, I was expecting that. There's a reason we aren't in the main cave, because safety comes first. We don't have any way to make a spell specifically for opening a crystal, so we're going to have to repurpose the spells we already do have to do that. What spells do we have that could do anything?"

"Well, I could try a reverse of Cold Shoulder Ice Storm," Eclipsa suggested. 

"Try that out," Marcie said, and placed a crystal donut on a rock and stepped away.

"Cold Shoulder Ice Storm," Eclipsa said, aiming the wand.

Nothing happened. Marcie glanced at Eclipsa. 

"Right, right, of course that wouldn't work. That spell unfreezes ice, not crystal," Eclipsa sighed and sat down on another rock.

Marcie sat down on the ground next to Eclipsa. "Let's go down the list. Name a spell, and we'll go through all the possible uses for it." Marcie grinned, and produced a notebook and a pen from nowhere. She clicked the pen. "And let it be known, I'm not afraid to get creative."

Black Widow Calamity Cobweb? Nope, it just ensnared the donut in a web. Which didn't help.

Dreamless Sleep? Nope, it didn't do anything to the nonliving crystal. 

Midnight Shriek? Nope, it hit the crystal and bounced off, causing them both to get blown off their feet. Marcie insisted on going on even after that, though. 

Black Velvet Inferno? No –

"Marcie!" Star shouted, from the entrance to the tunnels. 

"Oh hey, Star!" Marcie said, as Black Velvet Inferno totally failed to make a dent. "I got some crystal donuts from Rhombulus, totally with his permission, and we're trying to break them! How are you doing?"

"Cool, cool," Star said dismissively. "Mom woke up! For a little, anyways. She's probably sleeping now. Which you would have known ages ago, except you didn't pick up your phone!"

"What?" Marcie asked. She looked at her phone. "I don't see anything on here," she said, scrolling through her recent contacts. "No missed calls."

"Fine. Whatever. The point is, I spent ages wandering through those stinking tunnels! I almost wondered if there were more lizard people to save or whatever, but nothing happened! Until Glossaryck showed up and led me here."

"That's weird," Marcie said. "I've never had any problems with the tunnels when I really focused on getting to my destination."

"Yes, the tunnels respond best to willpower," Eclipsa said. "Perhaps you just need to hone yours. I could help you with that, once I'm done here."

"Whatever," Star growled. "What exactly are you doing here?"

"I already said that," Marcie said. "We're casting lots of different spells on this donut made of Rhombulus's crystal, searching for a way to free Globgor."

Star snorted. "Don't use your lecture-y voice on me, Diaz. Narwhal Blast!"

The narwhals did absolutely nothing. Marcie rolled her eyes. "See, Star, that's what's been happening all day."

"We've tried a few spells," Eclipsa said. "None of them have worked."

"Huh," Star said. "Well, how about... Supersonic Leech Bomb!"

Leeches stuck to the donut, and exploded, and... nothing happened. Well, the rock the donut was on was reduced to rubble, but nothing else happened. The donut was fine.

"Cupcake blast!"

The cupcakes did nothing. They were below average for eating, too.

"How does he expect anyone to eat these donuts?" Star asked, bewildered.

Eclipsa shrugged. "I don't know. Glossaryck and Lekmet can eat anything, but I don't know about Hekapoo and Omnitraxus."

"Hekapoo mentioned not liking Rhombulus's donuts," Marcie noted, "but she didn't say whether it was because she couldn't eat them."

"Well, no way around it," Star said. "I guess I'll have to talk to everyone in the Magic High Commission. They don't like Eclipsa, but they like me. I can help while we're waiting for my mom to wake up again."

"Oh, Moon was awake? How is she?" Eclipsa said.

"I said she was awake."

"I must not have caught it, then. Sorry about that. How is she?"

"Sure, whatever. She's awake, and she's doing... as well as you could guess, I guess. She told me some stuff about Toffee and everything. I wonder why I never asked her for lore... but whatever. I'll try to get back to Butterfly Castle and talk to the High Commission."

"And I will make sure you get there," Glossaryck said, from his perch on Marcie's shoulder.

Marcie jumped about a foot in the air. "How long have you been there?!"

"Marcie, my girl. Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to."

Marcie brushed him off her shoulder, which was a completely appropriate response.

Star and Glossaryck walked through the tunnels, and Star, having given up the Royal Dimensional Scissors, turned her into her butterfly form and opened a portal to the Plains of Time. Glossaryck followed her through it.

"Omnitraxus!" she shouted, flying towards the galaxy in the distance. 

Omnitraxus shrank down into zir coyote form. "Oh, Star! Hello. What brings you here?"

Star crossed all three pairs of arms. "Eclipsa's husband is trapped in a crystal. I need you to help me convince Rhombulus to free him."

"Star, I would never do that! How could you suggest such a thing? Globgor is as evil as Eclipsa is."

Star snorted. "That's not the insult you think it is, Omnitraxus."

Omnitraxus shook zir head. "Eclipsa is very dangerous, Star, especially now that you've handed the wand to her. She made terrible dark magic that should never have existed. To be frank, I was somewhat relieved when she ran away without the wand."

"Didn't stop you from trying everything to get her back," Star replied, angrily.

" I was never intending on getting her back," Omnitraxus said, shrugging. "I was glad when Rhombulus locked her away. Magic like that shouldn't exist."

"Yes, well, Solaria started the spell!" Star shouted back. "She was the reason Eclipsa made it in the first place, and you didn't lock her up."

Omnitraxus snorted. "She met her fate before poking the proverbial bear. And the Darkest Spell... Solaria may have had the idea, but the execution was all Eclipsa. And that was all that mattered."

Star snorted. "So she made spells you don't approve of. It doesn't mean you had to separate her from her family for three hundred years. What if Meteora wasn't crystalized, huh? She would've lived and died without ever knowing her mother. You would've ruined her life?"

Omnitraxus sighed. "Sometimes sacrifices must be made for the greater good." And then ze retreated, back into zir galaxy form.

"Yeah, right," Star sniffed. Then she yelled: "YOU JUST HATE HER BECAUSE HER HUSBAND WAS A MONSTER! I KNOW THAT'S WHY!"

Glossaryck shrugged. "Yeah, my children can be so prejudiced sometimes," he said, as if that wasn't completely his fault. Like, just because you like Eclipsa, doesn't mean you don't hold bigoted views, and definitely doesn't mean you didn't pass those views onto your children.

Star opened a portal into Hekapoo's dimension. She glanced back, but Glossaryck didn't follow, so she turned to the barren wasteland in front of her. "Hekapoo! I know you're out there!"

"Hey," said Hekapoo from behind her, where she was closing Star's portal. "You here to try for your own pair of scissors? Because you gave my finest creation to the Queen of Darkness. She's going to get, like, monster fur aaalll over them. Gross."

Star turned to Hekapoo and crossed her arms. "Hey! I don't see you cleaning up the monster fur!"

Hekapoo raised an eyebrow.

Star glanced away. "...yeah, that didn't come out right. Look, I need you to help convince Rhombulus to open Globgor's crystal. He's trapped in there, and he is your king now, whether you like it or not."

"I'm guessing that didn't come out right either?"

Star scoffed. "Well, it's true."

Hekapoo snorted. "Look, you think I'm gonna help you get that monster out? When he was free, he did his best to beat our army. They even managed to take down a Solarian warrior. Many noble Mewmans died."

"And what about the not-noble ones, huh?" Star said. "Or the monsters on Globgor's side? Don't they count?"

"The not-noble Mewmans were also in the fight, and were among the casualties. The monsters... Well, they were peaceful subjects duped into fighting a pointless conflict by Globgor, so yes, they count too."

Star growled. "Oh, you think they weren't smart enough to make their own decisions?"

"Yes, that is what I'm saying. Just look how they follow the Forces of Evil, despite Mewni being superior in every way."

Star scoffed. "If they want to follow the Forces of Evil, that's their choice! They deserve to make their own choices!"

"So you agree with me that the Forces of Evil is a menace and we should stop them and everyone allied with them." Hekapoo said, checking her claws.

"No no no no no!" Star said. "Uh... I mean... not really. I... just because someone sided with them, doesn't make them evil! I mean –"

"Just admit you haven't thought this through and save us both some time," Hekapoo said, opening a portal and disappearing through it.

"Come on!" Star groaned. She didn't know what to think. You could support Globgor and Eclipsa without supporting the Forces of Evil, right? Or... No. Eclipsa was good, so Globgor had to be good, but that didn't mean Toffee was good. It didn't!

Anyways. Time for Rhombulus. I'm friends with him, we get along well... he'll listen to me, right? Famous last words.

Star opened a portal into Rhombulus's crystal dimension. "Hey, uh, Rhombulus?"

Rhombulus was doing bench-presses in the corner. He was doing that obnoxious breath-holding and grunting thing weak (generally) men in gyms do to make themselves look tough, you know the one, the one that doesn't help you weight-lift and is actually counterproductive because you need oxygen? But Rhombulus didn't need oxygen, so... I guess it was okay.

"Rhombulus!" Star said.

Rhombulus looked up. "Oh, Star! How's it hanging? We haven't talked in forever! Have I mentioned I love your butterfly? It's so colorful and neon."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Star said irately. "I'm here to make you free Globgor. Whether you like it or not."

Rhombulus snorted. "That monster? He used to eat Mewmans! Before I froze him."

"Eat Mewmans?" Star gasped. "What?"

"Actually that was Bobgor," Hekapoo said, leaning out of the portal. "The other barbarian baby eater. Wife of Bobipsa. Globgor's still bad, though."

"Are you calling me a liar?!" Rhombulus demanded.

"I'm not calling you a truther," Hekapoo said, retreating and closing the portal.

"She left, so I won the argument," Rhombulus said. "Globgor ate Mewmans! So he's bad."

Star snorted. "You sure about that? Because I'm not. I'm sure Eclipsa would have told me if he ate Mewmans."

Rhombulus rolled his eye. "Sure. Because she's told you about her alliance with the Forces of Evil, right?"

"... YES! She has! And it was a necessary evil because of what you did to her family."

Rhombulus snorted. "Yeah, sure, whatever. I don't care."

Star groaned. "Seriously? You've done so much to her, and all you can throw at me for justification is a bunch of fabricated bull dung about how she eats babies or fought to defend herself and her family?"

"There's way more!" Rhombulus said. "She created so much dark magic –"

"Not as dark as you think it is, and the worst spells were started by Solaria," Star noted.

"– She's super selfish –"

"So am I, and many other Mewmans who you didn't throw in crystals."

"– She allied with the Forces of Evil –"

"Already got that one."

"– She was already in a perfectly fine marriage to a Mewman –"

"An arranged marriage she didn't consent to!"

"– She ran off with a monster!"

"So?"

"She's totally – ugh! You don't understand! She's evil, and her husband is worse!"

Star sighed, and shook her head. "Maybe you're the evil one." She opened a portal and left.

Rhombulus looked after her. "She left... so you win the argument, right?" his right snake hand said.

Rhombulus said nothing, and just looked at where the portal had disappeared.

Star hadn't really thought of a place to go when she opened that portal, she'd just created one out of anger and gone through it. So she was surprised to find herself flying over the open ocean, waves rolling and no land in sight.

A perfect place to scream in frustrations at the top of her lungs. 

She did so, and the only thing missing was a pillow to shove her face in. It was a perfect screaming spot. She should come here more often, with pillows.

Then there was a voice. "Star?!"

"Meteora?" Star asked, looking around.

"Down here!" Meteora said, treading water in the sea below.

"What... what are you doing in the middle of the ocean?"

"I could... ask you the same... thing," Meteora said. She would have crossed her arms, but they were busy keeping her above water. Also, she wasn't looking right at Star. While Earth doctors were miracles, they hadn't been able to restore her eyes. They had been burned out too much. But after several surgeries, the places where her eyes should be were scarred over, with glass eyes in a nice shade of brown.

"Wait, hold on. Winter Storm Hyperblow!" Star created an ice floe and lighted on it, holding one of her arms out for Meteora.

Meteora at first didn't react, and then Star remembered, and tapped one of her arms. Meteora was able to find it and Star pulled her onto the floe. "Thanks. Saint Olga would've said that my fat keeps me buoyant, but I don't think that's how this works. I'm dead tired."

"Yeah, but why were you swimming in the middle of the ocean?" Star asked.

Meteora tried to avoid Star's gaze, but she didn't have much success. "I was looking for the wand," she said.

"The wand?"

"The wand Rhombulus gave Saint Olga. It crystalizes and de-crystalizes things. The wreckage of Saint O's is somewhere below us, and I stole my mother's dimensional scissors."

"Ooh, bad girl. You must get that from your mama."

"Thanks. But the wand'll be in the rubble. I was hoping if I found it we could use it to free my dad."

"Oh..." Star said. "I just kinda ended up here."

"I guess," Meteora said. "I don't know what to do. I want to meet him... I have no memories of him. But I can't find my way back to Saint O's."

"You can't do some kinda magic?" Star asked. She decided, though, that she was going to get Globgor out. She couldn't imagine not even having memories of her father.

"I... I learned how to do magic with my eyes. They were all that I could move in my crystal. I couldn't see anything, my eyelids were closed, but I could move my eyes. And I had the strangest dreams..." Meteora trailed off.

"Weird," Star said. "I mean, not weird, it's awful you can't do magic, but... maybe we can teach you how to use magic with your hands, too."

"Maybe," Meteora said. "But it'll be a learning curve... I'm not as powerful as you are."

"Yeah, but I'm special. Everyone says so," Star pointed out. "And Glossaryck needs to teach you like he taught me. Has he done any lessons with you?"

"I haven't tried for the wand yet, so... no." Meteora said. "And I won't try for the wand until Mom's rule is secure. So it'll probably be a while."

"Huh, weird. He hasn't stopped teaching me."

"You're special. Everyone says so," Meteora dryly repeated.

"I guess. But I could help you out –" Star's phone buzzed. It was Marcie. "Hold on, I gotta take this."

"Star! We tried to use a spell on the crystal, but Eclipsa had a really bad reaction to it!"

Star's stomach dropped. "What? What happened? Which spell?"

"The one to kill septarians."

Star's stomach, if it were possible, dropped even further. "Did you destroy anything with it?"

"Yes, the crystal donut. It's gone, evaporated."

Star shook herself. "Eclipsa. Is she okay?"

"She's still conscious, but she's really out of it. I'm taking her to the hospital as we speak."

"Hopefully the hospital can do something. Dang it, this was all my fault."

"What? Your fault? If anything it's –"

"No, Mom told me the spell had been altered, but I didn't tell Eclipsa because I didn't think! I'm –"

"Star. It's fine. Just tell me what's going on. Will she get worse?"

"I don't know! Ask Mom once you get to the hospital wing! I'm coming with Meteora! I'll open a portal, hold on."

Marcie hung up, and turned to Meteora, who was already getting up. "What happened to Mom?"

"She used a spell that backfired badly," Star replied. "Hopefully she'll get better, but we need to go to her really quick." She summoned her butterfly form and opened a portal, while at the same time Meteora used the Royal Dimensional Scissors to cut open a portal.

Star and Meteora looked at each other, and both went through the other's portals. Whoops.

They emerged in the hospital wing, as Marcie came in with Eclipsa. According to Eclipsa, the pain wasn't as bad as it could've been, but it had been quite the shock and it was taking a while to fade. According to the doctors, "We have no idea what will happen here. It's magic pain. Just... deal with whatever happens and we'll give you some painkillers."

"I simply didn't expect it. The spell has never done that to me before, and I've used it and others like it many times, as you can see," Eclipsa said, gesturing to her hands. 

"Yeah... Toffee changed something about it," Star said. "According to Mom, Toffee had enough of her using it and cursed it. Thank goodness you only used it to blast a donut."

"I suppose that is a good thing," Eclipsa said. "But I could never use it to free Globgor. I'd be in too much pain to continue."

"And you'd probably hit Globgor with it, too," Marcie noted.

"That too."

"So it's back to the drawing board. I wish I'd memorized every spell in the old book when I read through it," Marcie said, looking over some notes she'd grabbed to read while Eclipsa was seen by the doctors. "I noted that the crystal pulverizing spell existed, but I don't have anything on how to do it."

"Have you tried yelling 'Crystal Pulverizing Spell' and blasting the donuts? That works for me, like, ninety percent of the time," Star noted.

"No, it didn't work, we tried that," Marcie said.

"I didn't expect it to work," Eclipsa said. "My mother's spells tend to be more... visceral than that."

"Huh. I... I got nothing" Star admitted. "Do you have any idea what we could do?"

"I don't know. All I know is I'm never using that dark spell again," Eclipsa said. Then she gasped. "The pain! It's fading!"

Star breathed a sigh of relief. Finally something that went right.

But it didn't matter that nothing had quite gone right in weeks. Their luck had to change eventually, right?

She would make sure Globgor got out. She would make sure everything was alright.

Well, we're nowhere closer to freeing Globgor. The High Commission's useless, and none of Eclipsa's spells worked except for one that worked too well. Ugh.

Chapter Text

Marcie was in a strange world with perpetual twilight. She was assigned to talk to dead people, and had a nice chat with Celena the Shy about her secrets. Celena was about to tell her what the Forces of Evil's deal was, but when she opened her mouth, all that came out was a snapping sound. Marcie exclaimed that she couldn't hear her, but Celena kept snapping away, not listening to her.

Then there was a weird sensation of something hitting her nose, and Marcie woke up, to see a white and orange blur in front of her. She yelped and karate-chopped it.

"Hey! It's just me, you jerk!"

"Hekapoo?" Marcie asked, looking at the figure better. It was indeed Hekapoo.

"Hey, dork. I thought after living with Star you'd get used to people waking you up at weird hours. Not karate-chop people when they're just trying to talk to you."

"Yeah, well, I can't see very well when I first wake up, and you are technically breaking and entering," Marcie said, crossing her arms.

"Don't I look a little like Star?" Hekapoo asked, raising an eyebrow.

"No. Star is not a lion."

"So you could tell it was me!" Hekapoo scoffed, laughing. Marcie opened her mouth to continue the witty banter, but Hekapoo didn't let her. "Hey, aren't you gonna ask me why I'm here?"

"You're bored."

"Well, yes, but I'm mostly majorly bored of your stupid dragoncycle. She's been eating all the metal I've been using to forge scissors. Can you imagine it? Someone does years, maybe decades of work, only for me to run out of metal for their scissors because of a stupid dragoncycle." Hekapoo pulled a leash she was holding, and Nachos came through her fiery portal, looking downcast. But she perked up immediately when she saw Marcie. "Your pet, your house."

"Riiiight," Marcie said. "Uh, I don't have a stable for her. My house is way too small for that."

"Your problem, not mine," Hekapoo said. "I gave you a whole year of notice, by the way."

Marcie glanced at her bedside table. Indeed, there was a scrawled notice: I'M MAKING YOU TAKE BACK YOUR STUPID DRAGONCYCLE. GET READY OR WHATEVER – H-POO.

"Hekapoo, I think that was a year in the Neverzone. Your dimension. Not mine. And I was asleep, for all of it."

"Whatever. It's no problem for me. Just take your stupid dragoncycle. She's been driving me up the wall."

"Okay, I'll figure something out. For a friend." Marcie smiled at Hekapoo.

"Yeah, sure, whatever," Hekapoo said, though she smiled back. She handed Marcie the leash, and Marcie took it. Then she exited, through the portal. 

Marcie turned to Nachos. Nachos, with Marcie's attention now on her, wiggled with happiness. "Have you been a bad girl?" Marcie asked.

Nachos bounced on her wheels, as if to say Yes, definitely, absolutely.

Marcie sighed and shook her head. "You little rascal, you. It's not going to work on me!"

Nachos just stared at her, pupils completely blown.

"It's not going to work!"

Nachos wiggled her tail.

"Ugh, fine, it totally works. I just can't stay mad at you, you little draglet, you!" Marcie scritched Nacho's belly. The dragoncycle wiggled her wheels excitedly. Then she burped, and spit a bit of flame into the air. Marcie quickly moved to stomp it out.

Fire out, Marcie turned to Nachos and crossed her arms. "We're gonna have to work on that, aren't we." She texted the group chat: Not going to come, something came up. Have fun!

Meteora opened a closet in her new room, and felt for a dress she could wear. Her mother's new position allowed for any number of butlers and maids to help her, but she didn't need them. Saint Olga would want her dress to match her stockings, so screw Saint Olga.

She picked a dress, changed out of her pajamas, and opened the door to the rest of the castle, where her mother had given her a break from queenly duties. Thanks, Mom.

She opened the door, walked out, and literally ran into Star, who had been standing in front of her door, trying to figure out if she should knock. "Oof! Who is it?"

Star had nearly fallen over in both shock and because the significantly larger Meteora had run into her. "Uh, it's just me!" she squeaked.

"...Star? Am I getting that right?"

"Yeah, it's me. Star. I'm Star."

"Right. What are you doing here?"

"Well, uh..." Star started. Impressive opening line. "Maybe I was just... okay. I was going to ask you if you wanted to go on a shopping trip with me and a few girls. We're going to all the best malls... you know, like the one in Echo Creek, and a few across the multiverse! Stuff like that. It'll be fun."

"But... I can't see any of the stuff we'd be buying. How could I..."

"You can still feel stuff, silly! And we can tell you the colors. You remember colors, right?"

"Yes... but I don't know if I have money."

"Already taken care of," Star said. She pressed a plastic card into Meteora's hands. "It's a credit card, from your mom. She wanted you to know you can buy whatever you'd like, and it'll be on her tab."

"Oh, really? Thank you. Or thank her, I guess."

"Yeah. Any more objections, or can we go shopping or what? Hah, so many ors."

"I... guess not. Let's go."

Marcie first tried putting Nachos in Eclipsa's Royal Stables. "Okay, Nachos, you'll be nice and comfortable here," she said, as stablehands glanced anxiously at the dragon amongst the many warnicorns. Don't know what they were worried about, warnicorns are meaner than any dragon.

Nachos whimpered anxiously.

"Come on, you'll love it here. I'll come to feed you twice a day, and you'll have plenty of people to keep you nice and happy."

Nachos just kept whimpering.

"I'm sure you're going to be happy with everything," Marcie said. She shook hands with the manager of the stables, and left.

Not three seconds after she'd stepped out of the door, there was a thundering sound of wheels, and then a splintering noise. Marcie looked back to the stable, and was bowled over by Nachos, who licked her face and whimpered in relief.

Marcie groaned. "Nachos! You have to stay there! You're being a bad girl!"

Nachos just grunted and licked Marcie's face again.

Never let it be said that Marcie was not persistent, for she tried many times to keep Nachos in her stall. Bribing her with treats, giving her her dinner early, leaving via dimensional scissors instead of walking. But each attempt failed, and eventually the stable manager put her foot down and kicked Marcie and Nachos from the building.

Quite literally.

Marcie sighed and glared at Nachos, who was chasing a lizard rat. "You are seriously a bad girl. Well, I guess there's no choice. Time to call in the big guns."

Nachos blinked. Her eyes widened, her pupils dilated, and she started shaking.

"Yes, that's right, Nachos. We're going to the vetcanic ... the vet-mechanic."

Meteora clasped her fingers together from behind her back. Star had led her to a strange-smelling room. "Okay, Meteora, this is my girl squad, minus Marcie, who is doing something, I don't know what, and... well. This is Kelly, Janna, and Jackie. Say hi, everyone!"

Everyone said their hellos, but Meteora couldn't really tell which voice was attached to which. She knew Star's voice by now, and her mother's, and Marcie's, but everyone else's just kind of blended into the background. Plus, Star and everyone else hadn't really specified which voice was which. Meteora said hello, too.

"So. Everyone ready to get over to Echo Creek Mall to do some shopping?" Star said.

Everyone said yes, though Meteora definitely heard someone saying she didn't have as much money as the rest of them, so they'd better be generous, or let her steal their wallets.

Meteora decided she liked the owner of that voice.

Star made a noise that indicated she was turning into her butterfly, and then a noise and feeling like a rip in cloth, and a portal opened. Star grabbed Meteora, and the gang went through the portal.

Meteora could feel the fresh air of the mall. Truth be told, she had never gone to a proper mall. Saint Olga was all about stuffy little corner shops when she deigned to send someone (never Meteora, always someone less... dangerous) to buy something. She could tell from the numerous echoing voices that this was a huge, wide-open space, very much unlike the cramped halls of Saint Olga.

"Are we inside or outside? This place feels like it has its own weather system," Meteora finally asked.

"It's outside," Star said. Meteora could hear a slight awkwardness in her voice. "We're outside right now."

"Oh. Cool," Meteora said. "I don't think I've ever been in a place like this. Outside. I forgot to ask you: what makes a mall special? I know it's some kind of store, but what makes it a... mall?"

"Oh, a mall is a bunch of stores in the same place!" Star said. "We're in a strip mall, where every store's entrance is on the outside. It was hard for me to tell the difference."

"I like indoor malls better, to be honest," one voice said. "They're more likely to have stores where you can get interesting junk like spellbooks and magic detectors and weird little misshaped kitchen utensils. But, eh, beggars can't be choosers."

"Ooh, it's the Better Store!" Star said, grabbing Meteora's arm. "It sells all kinds of cool junk. There was this one time, with some pirate restraunteers – oh, never mind. Point is, it's a great place."

"You sure?" another voice chimed in. "Looks like a cheap infomercial store to me."

"You just don't understand Earth magic , Kelly," Star said. "I think all of Earth's magic has been absorbed into stores like this. It's why Earth is so non-magical now."

"I don't think that's how magic works."

"With all due respect, Janna, how would you know?"

"Excuse me, I know plenty about magic. Why'd you think I wanted spellbooks, then?"

"Sorry, but your occulty and hypnotic-y stuff isn't real magic. The real magic is this!" A scuffling sound, and crinkling and ripping paper. "This Black Opal pan! Look how pretty it is! Or, well, uh..."

"That's gross. You're supposed to cook food in that?" Another voice, not 'Janna' said. "Wouldn't all that dye totally come out in your food? And I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to open packages like that."

"Kelly. Kelly, my girl. The point is it's really really pretty," Star said. "And if they didn't want you to open the box to look at them, why wouldn't they put up a display model up or something?"

"There is a display model. Right there," Kelly said. Meteora supposed she was pointing.

"Oh..." Star said. More crinkling paper. "There! Good as new."

Kelly snorted. Then Janna spoke: "Look, Star, I know you want to know why Earth has no magic, but I really don't think it's because cheap infomercial products absorbed all of it."

"Uh, no, they definitely did! Jackie, back me up on this!"

A voice responded that Meteora had only heard when everyone was saying their hellos. "Star, seriously, I don't know anything about magic. To me, any of this could be possible."

Meteora shook her head. It felt like everyone was just ignoring her. She knew lots about magic. Why wasn't she being asked? A lady never speaks unless spoken to, Saint Olga said in her mind.

You won't have anything useful to say anyways.

They're clearly just having fun. Don't ruin it for them.

It's fine. Keep calm. Don't mess this up. Don't talk. Just smile and laugh along.

Why should you interrupt them? You're an outsider, you don't belong here.

Star just invited you here to be nice. You weren't ever actually welcome.

"Hey," a voice said. Jackie, wasn't it? She tapped on Meteora's fingers. "You okay?"

"What? I –" Meteora instinctively tried to blink herself out of the fog, or turn to see the person talking to her right now, but she could do neither. "I... I don't know."

"Hey. Let them argue over infomercial products. I think I need to talk to you."

The dragoncycle vetcanic (vet-mechanic), a tall, burly man with several facial scars, knocked on Nacho's wheel and hmmed. "Well, nothing's broken, or flat. Looks like your dragoncycle has a good ol' case of separation anxiety. Not much I can do."

"Why did it develop now?"

"Dunno. You probably spent a lot of time with her, and then left her for a while."

"Maybe... I was riding her a lot closing portals with Hekapoo, but they haven't been opening for a while now..."

"That sounds right," the vetcanic (vet-mechanic) said.

"Huh. Okay," Marcie said. "So what do you recommend?"

"I'd say you should keep her with you a lot, and then gradually wean her off your presence. Go away for a few minutes at a time, then a few hours, stuff like that. And..."

"And?" Marcie asked.

"And DON'T FORGET TO CUDDLE HER!"

"Yes, sir!"

A pause.

"I'm not sure where to keep her, though," Marcie said.

"Oh, yeah, I can get you some portable space-bending stables. They're 80% off at Quest Buy. You just stick the patient in 'em and move 'em with you, or not, and you'll have an anxiety-free dragoncycle in plenty of time."

Marcie breathed a sigh of relief. "Okay. That's good to hear."

"You know, it's good to see good pet owners like you. Going to the vet isn't easy! Also, this trip will be six hundred and fifty dollars."

Marcie sighed and forked over the cash. "Thanks."

"You're welcome!"

Jackie didn't take Meteora far. Just far away for their conversation. to fade into the background for the arguing Star, Janna, and Kelly.

"So... how are you doing?" Jackie asked. "Star filled me in on the whole thing."

"I... I'm doing... I'm doing... well enough?"

"Dude. I know an anxiety attack when I see one. You may be quiet, but no one with long nails or claws just happens to scrape at their arms like that. Or breathes so quickly. Or doesn't speak up on a topic they should be knowledgeable about. Look, part of it may be that your anxious symptoms are a lot like my sister's, but I know you weren't in a good mental state," Jackie said.

 "I guess... I just thought... I feel like I don't belong here," Meteora admitted. "Like Star invited me as an afterthought, and I'm not actually welcome here. It's... I don't know. It's a lot."

"Yeah, well, Star didn't invite you for no reason. I was there when she frantically thought of ways to get you to like her, and I was the one who suggested she just treat you as a friend. Pretty simple, I thought. But if you want to do things one-on-one... you know, I'm fine with that too."

"Wait... but I don't blend in all that well. Or maybe I blend in too much. They don't... they don't seem to notice me at all."

"If you're not one for silly arguments, that's fine," Jackie said. Her voice was gentle and calm. Meteora decided she liked that. "Neither am I especially when they are about stuff I don't understand, but I'm still a member of the group."

"But... I do understand magic."

"Then we all think it's okay for you to talk about it! You can't possibly say a wrong thing here. Star would be ecstatic to talk to you properly." Jackie said. "I bet you my life savings you could go up and start talking about your view of the magic of infomercial products, and she would totally go with it."

"I don't want to just... take over..."

"You aren't, believe me," Jackie said. "If there's one thing this group of girls doesn't have, it's the ability to talk over everyone else. There's three other big personalities to deal with. And me. I'm pretty chill."

Meteora smiled. "I guess... thanks."

"No problem."

It's "you're welcome." Not "no problem." Impoliteness in a lady must be corrected, Inner Saint Olga said. Screw you, Saint Olga.

And Meteora walked with Jackie back to the group. Star, Janna, and Kelly were still arguing, though now they were arguing about a sugar-free frozen yogurt maker. "I'm just saying, that's not all that impressive!" Kelly was saying. "Frozen yogurt isn't that hard to make, right? I've never tried it. Can't really digest lactose."

"Then you need this lactose-free ice cream maker!" Star said, presumably holding up one such specimen. "It's even more magical than the Yogtastic Freezinator."

Meteora took a breath, and spoke up. "You know, if this store is so magical, it must have a well nearby. I don't know where Earth's main well is, but there's plenty of branchings in..." Meteora took another breath. "In, you know... a well. Little bits of magic can... can come up in weird places."

A pause.

"You're totally right," Janna said. "If there's a well around here, then we can find it." 

"And we can prove that these infomercial products are totally fake!" Kelly shouted triumphantly.

"Oooor that they're so magical. Magic is everywhere!"

"I didn't say they weren't magical, I said they were fake," Kelly pointed out.

"I highly doubt they're magical," Janna said. "I mean, from my uneducated non-magical perspective, of course."

"You never know," Meteora said. "Magic is weird."

"Yeah! Take that!"

I've been quiet lately. Part of it is the sheer enormity of the topics at hand, and I didn't feel my snarky commentary was... helpful. It's also because I wanted to immerse myself in different POVs, and leave myself behind. And of course, leaving a few of my own biases behind for a more exciting and biased payoff. Stuff like that.

But this... this was cute. Also Nachos is perfect, the Best Bean. And Meteora is good. Love her.

But, ugh, I cannot wait for everything to be brought to light! There's so much lore and Glossaryck-bashing I want to get to! Move to Star's Diary, I can't handle this!

So, uh... today was kind of a disaster? Not because of Meteora, no, she was great and everything. But we got kicked out of my favorite store! Apparently trying to sneak into places marked "Employee-Only" is a bad thing. I mean, what the heck are employees, and why aren't I one? Meteora didn't know either, and tried to apologize for it, but she's good with me. Kelly said they're people the store is paying. Why would the store be paying anyone to go into "Employee-Only" places? I'm so confused. Earth stuff is still weird.

Chapter Text

"So, uh... Janna?" Tom asked, glancing around at the garbage around him. "Why did you pick me of all people to join you on this... junk-collecting trip?"

"Several big and important reasons," Janna said, glancing at her phone. "Star's at some weird meeting, and Marcie just texted me "GLOBGOR!!!!" in all caps with several exclamation points, so... I don't think she's coming."

"Yeah, but why me? Why not, like, Jackie or Kelly or your weirdly buff knitting club friends?"

Janna grinned, and tapped her fingers together. "Because you, my good dude, are a demon, and you can sense magic."

"I – what? I can't sense magic. I don't – why do you think I can sense magic, Janna?"

Tom glanced at Janna, who was texting someone only labeled with a dragon emoji. "Janna?"

"Yeah?"

"What the heck are you talking about? I'm just an ordinary half-demon, why should I be able to sense magic? Whatever that means."

Janna sighed. "You're a demon. Demons can sense magic. I thought everyone knew that."

Tom frowned. "I did not know that, sorry."

"Well, you can. I bet you don't even know about your ability to summon a horde of the undead, either."

"What? I can – Ookay," Tom breathed in, and out. "If today is a day for learning about my demon powers, why are we literally in the middle of a garbage heap?"

"Because you're already supposed to know all your powers, and I'm looking for magical junk for various projects and stuff."

Tom eyed her, frowning slightly. "And... how do I sense magic?"

"You'll see," Janna said. "In the meantime, let's look for some junk."

Star and Eclipsa stood in the Bureaucracy of Magic, waiting. They had been waiting for quite some time. Eclipsa tapped her foot, and Star surreptitiously grabbed her compact and played a weird Mewman video game. Eclipsa noticed and watched over her shoulder. After about twenty minutes of that, Eclipsa groaned. "As enthralling as that little device is, I really have to say that when the Magic High Commission announces an urgent and important meeting, you'd think they wouldn't make us wait for forty-five minutes."

"I know, right?" Star said, glancing at Eclipsa. "Like, I can totally wait a few minutes for a life-or-death situation. But almost an hour? And there's nowhere to sit!"

"Sean!" Eclipsa shouted.

Sean appeared.

"Sean, please inform the Magic High Commission that I will be leaving and returning when they aren't so busy."

Star nodded. "Let's go, Eclipsa! Let's just... get outta here!"

"Wait!" Sean said. "Uh... before you leave, why don't you –"

"Sean, I say this with the utmost politeness, but I do not care about offending neither you nor your superior's sensibilities, and I will start caring when they free my husband." Eclipsa tightened her grip on the wand. "Come along now, Star."

"Wait just one more minute!" Sean said. He ducked behind the desk, and whispered something in his radio neither Star nor Eclipsa could hear, though they could guess what he was saying.

He took just long enough that Eclipsa started tapping her foot again, but he soon popped back up again. "Okay, the Magic High Commission has taken time out of their very busy schedules to meet with you!"

"As they should. I am the queen and this is incredibly urgent business, after all," Eclipsa said, annoyed.

"Yeah! Yeah, definitely!" Sean said. "They're at the top of the tower! Obviously! And the elevator is, like, totally broken, so take the stairs!"

Eclipsa growled, grabbed Star, and flew to the stairs and up them with her wand. "Let's get this over with."

Janna tossed an empty, scrunched up can, catching it in her hand. "So. Tom. See anything magical on this?"

"I still don't know why you're expecting me to be able to see magic. I've never heard of any demons being able to do that."

"How quickly you forget your history," Janna observed.

"What? Seriously, what do you mean by any of this? How would I be able to do any of this? If I can do everything you said, why don't I know about it?"

"For the third question: Mewman censorship, for the first question: I bet you can do a whole lot of stuff you've never tried before, and for the second question, well. Literally. The Underworld was basically built on a branch of Mewni's magic well. Of course you'd be able to do all kinds of weird magic. Pretty weird, specific magic, of course, but magic nonetheless. I'm kinda jealous, honestly."

"I – what ? There's only one magic well, Star brought me to it a while ago. And how do you know all this ?"

"Magic wells are like trees, dude," Janna said, ignoring Tom's second question. "They branch out to different places. Sure, there's the main trunk, but there's a whole lot of branches in a dimension. Some, like yours, have been filtered through the elements and conditions of the area they spring up in, but they still give those in proximity magic, just specific kinds. But this way more people have magic. Things get a little more fair."

" How do you know this ?"

"If I told you, I'd have to kill you..." Janna said, wiggling her hands. The sky seemed to get darker. 

Then it brightened again. "Or else you'd tell Star, and I'd get killed. She's not ready for the truth yet. Very soon, but not quite yet."

" What the heck does that mean ?" Tom was speaking in so many italics he was beginning to get a headache.

Janna shrugged serenely, but her expression suddenly faded to horror. "Oh no. I'm turning into Glossaryck ! Look, Tom, I have so much I can't wait to tell everyone, but for now you'll just have to take my word for it, okay? And part of that is helping me find anything that could be magical. Because you want to learn most of my secrets, right?"

"...most?" Tom said, choosing to prioritize the least bizarre part of Janna's words. Not sure if he made the right choice, but eh.

"I'm not giving up all my secrets, okay? I gotta be mysterious somehow," Janna said, punching Tom in the shoulder. "I'm just gonna teach you everything you could ever want to know about your magic." She paused, and looked at her phone for a full ten seconds. "Right. First warning: Don’t use this power on Mewni, especially not near the Royal Magic Wand.”

“What?”

“In other dimensions, it’s fine, but Mewni is so saturated with magic that you’d go blind. So don’t use this spell there, got it?”

Tom nodded hesitantly.

“Okay. You know how you sense ghosts?"

"...yeah?" 

"Ghosts are magic, dude. We just have to broaden your ghost-dar a little bit."

Tom frowned. "...and, how do we do that, exactly?"

"Oh, my sweet child," Janna said, putting an arm around Tom and gesturing at the giant junkyard before them. "There's a whole world of magic out there, and you're just dipping your little toes in it."

"Dude, that is a really weird way to phrase that," Tom said, sweating.

"I'm just full of weird phrases," Janna said, grinning.

"Ohkay," Tom said, pushing Janna away. "If you won't tell me what's going on..."

"I won't."

"If you won't tell me what's going on, then tell me how to use this magic-detecting spell."

Janna nodded. "Okay," She took out her phone and moved to the notes app, and then showed Tom an incantation in Demonic, about honing one's mind to see the unseeable. "Do the focusing thing you do for the ghost-detector, but chant this."

"How'd you get Demonic characters on your phone?" Tom asked. "I've been trying for years, but I've never been able to get it to work."

"Oh, there's this extension created by this princess-engineer, I think her name's Ayo Something, maybe Zargari?" A pause, as Janna's phone dinged. The dragon emoji had texted. "Oh, I was right, Zargari. Good to know," Janna said, dismissing the text before Tom could read it.

"Cool," Tom said, though he was burning with curiosity regarding who exactly Janna was texting and how they knew he and Janna were talking about Zargari. He hadn't noticed her text that to them, so what was going on? "So I just read the incantation?"

"Yeah, and do the thing you do to sense ghosts at the same time," Janna said.

Tom nodded, and closed his eyes, focusing. He spoke the incantation. Nothing felt different. He opened his eyes. "WHAT THE F –"

"Hey. No swearing," Janna's voice said. Her fingers were over his mouth, but he couldn't see her.

Tom couldn't tell where she was, because his sight HAD COMPLETELY DISAPPEARED. Everything was black. "I can't see anything!"

"Yeah, that means it's working," Janna said. "Can you see this?" Suddenly there was a faint golden light, an illumination of a... glowing tin can.

"What? Why is it glowing? Why can't I see anything?"

"It's glowing because it's magic. I knew this stupid little scrap of metal was useful! As for why everything is dark, you're not good enough with your powers to be able to sense the background magic of the universe. You'll get better at seeing magic eventually."

"So... wait." Tom looked around, at what should be a rubbish heap. But there were... little specks of light, coming from a whole bunch of the trash. The rest was black. "All the little glowing things are magic?"

"Yes! We need the brightest and most magical bits. Can you find them?"

"Yeah, as long as you tell me how to get out of this weird magic vision!" Tom said. "I can't walk anywhere if I'm nearly blind."

"Sure. Just take a deep breath, calm down, and recite I no longer seek the unseen. " Janna said the last part in Demonic.

"You speak demonic?"

"A few phrases here and there," Janna replied.

"Cool." Tom breathed in and out, using calming tactics he'd learned from his therapist, and recited the spell in Demonic. He blinked and his vision was back to normal. "Oh, wow!"

"Nice, isn't it? Now, Let's get some magic trash."

"So. Why have you brought me to this... meeting?" Eclipsa asked, irritation present in her voice.

"Well, we want to go over some recent developments," Hekapoo started.

"Oh?" Eclipsa asked.

"The first is the matter of... everything. How do you expect to be a good queen when half your time is spent in the Monster Temple, trying to free your monster husband?" 

"It's not half my time. I wake early to talk with Marcie in the morning, we experiment a little, and then I return to the castle. I repeat the same thing in the evening, after the day's duties are done."

"Yes, but as queen, you'll need to be available to defend Butterfly Castle at a moment's notice," Hekapoo said. "Which you can't do if you're in the middle of the Mountains of Incurable Anguish. And those mountains are dangerous. You shouldn't be there in the first place."

"I'm so glad you are worrying about my safety," Eclipsa said. "But there's a simple solution to all of this. What if you, say... freed Globgor? Opened the crystal? Then you wouldn't have to worry about any of this."

"We're not letting that monster out!"

"No way."

"Eclipsa, we've tried to be reasonable about this. You know that."

Eclipsa snorted. "Sure. Very well. I'll just ignore my greatest love and not try to get him out of the cage you put him in."

"That would be good, yeah," Hekapoo said.

Eclipsa snorted, and rolled her eyes. "I'm not doing that, sorry."

"Aww, man," Rhombulus said. "I thought she was serious this time."

"I believe that's called 'sarcasm,' Rhombulus," Omnitraxus said.

"You guys are hopeless," Hekapoo said, groaning.

Eclipsa made to leave. "Since we're done here...?"

"We're not done," Hekapoo said. "Another order of business: The Forces of Evil."

Eclipsa groaned.

Hekapoo rolled her eyes, but continued. "Ever since Meteora destroyed the kingdom only to be made into the next heir to the throne, we've been monitoring the return of monsters to their government-issued living spaces in the Forest of Certain Death. Members of all the main monster species appeared to be returning, until about a week ago, when all the septarians disappeared. And it wasn't just Mewni. The septarians in the monster diasporas across the whole multiverse are gone."

Eclipsa snorted. "I have noticed a strange lack of septarians, though their reasoning's none of my business. But I imagine you only noticed when your favorite dive bar closed down. And you say monsters are useless and should be ignored."

Hekapoo blushed. "That's neither here nor there! The point is, something nefarious is going on, and I am certain that the Forces of Evil is behind it."

"Yes, and why should we care?"

"Because they probably have some nefarious plan in place! We need to stop it!"

"And how might we do that, if we don't even know if they have one, much less what it is?"

The Magic High Commission all looked askance. "...I dunno," Rhombulus finally said. Hekapoo rolled her eyes and snorted.

Eclipsa did the same. Eye-rolling was all the rage now, apparently. Personally, it makes my head hurt, and also glitch through dimensions. Not always worth it, but sometimes. "Do you have anything useful to notify me of? Or shall I leave without any important or even interesting information being shared whatsoever?"

Hekapoo growled. "In fact, we do have something important! We monitor the ley lines around Mewni, and there's a weird signal emanating from the monster temple. It's magic that hasn't been used in... decades."

Eclipsa raised an eyebrow, unamused.

"It's very dark magic. The kind that shouldn't be used on a whim or played with. It was last used justifiably, to stop an invasion. But it won't be used again, right, Eclipsa?"

"No, I will not use it again," Eclipsa said. "The cost is too great, anyways."

"So you did use it!" Hekapoo said.

"Yes. It was an experiment to try to free my husband. It did not work."

"See? You care about your husband way too much!" Rhombulus shouted. "How could you betray everything your mother stood for by using dark magic to free a monster?"

A long silence.

Eclipsa stood up, and left. Star glared at the Magic High Commission while following Eclipsa, never breaking eye contact until she slammed the meeting room's door shut. Hopefully the Magic High Commission would feel as uncomfortable as she did!

The Magic High Commission looked at each other. "That was out of line, Rhombulus," Omnitraxus said.

"No it wasn't," Hekapoo said. "She needs to face the facts. She's a bad queen, and obsessing over that monster is only going to make her worse. I just hope the kingdom survives."

Nice worry, Hekapoo!

It won't.

Whenever Tom found something with magic, Janna would open a portal and toss it through, and then close the portal quickly. Tom was too wrapped up in using his newfound power to find the coolest things he could stare at to wonder where they went. The flickering glow was as fascinating as a flame to watch, and everything was so new, and so cool!

"Having fun?" Janna asked, as Tom stared intently at a glowing rock.

"YES – I mean, yeah, totally," Tom said, standing up and brushing himself off. "They're pretty cool."

"You don't have to be cool around me, dude. Magic is really awesome."

"Okay! I'm SO EXCITED! This is so cool ." Tom looked around with his new sight, and noticed a large glow emanating from a nearby pile of trash. He ran to it, not even turning off his magic view, and reached towards the pile to look at it.

"Tom! Get back!" Janna shouted.

Tom stepped back, confused. He transferred over to normal sight, and saw what Janna was so afraid of. The glow he had followed was a giant blue alligator-like creature, with huge open jaws and flashing teeth. It shook the trash off and let out a growling bellow.

"Oh, he is mad," Janna said. "Just keep inching backwards, Tom. Very slowly. Veeeerry slowly..."

Tom backed away slowly. Very slowly.

But the alligator hissed and moved quickly towards Tom. Tom curled up in a ball and shielded his face –

After a few seconds passed without him being very dead, Tom looked around. He was... in a magical brown beam, floating above Janna, who had summoned a set of brass knuckles. But, most noticeably, she had gray-brown glowing coffin shapes on her cheeks.

"Janna?" Tom asked, reaching out to her.

Janna stopped desperately alternating between looking at her phone and reciting words in a language Tom wasn't familiar with to glare at him. "Stop struggling! I'm saving your life!"

"Janna, what's going on?" Tom asked desperately.

"Bwah!" Janna responded, though she was talking to the alligator, not him.

"She's lost her marbles," Tom said, bewildered. It never got less weird.

No response. Janna was way too busy saving his life to help him. So he turned on his magic visions again, and looked at the scene. The alligator glowed like a torch, and Janna's brass knuckles glowed too, but Janna herself was weak and dull. She didn't have much power, Tom realized.

Then for the first time, he looked at himself. His hands. He was glowing too! Much brighter than Janna. About the same as the alligator. He changed back to normal view, aimed, and blasted a fireball at it.

"Tom, stop strug – Aah!" Janna yelped as Tom threw the fireball. It hit the alligator in the neck, burning it away. It toppled over, dead. "Tom!" Janna said, ending the Levitato spell and dropping Tom into a trash pile.

"What?" Tom said, sitting up despite trash covering him. "I saved your life. There was no way you could've beaten that crocodile."

Janna kicked some dirt in his face. "Then it was good that I wasn't aiming to beat it, huh?"

"Ugh, what?"

"I was communicating with it! I was trying to get it to calm down!" She sighed and kneeled by the crocodile. "Look, these guys as a species have been dealt a really bad hand by people like us. It didn't deserve to go out like this."

"What? Is that one more thing you're not telling me about? Like the fact that you can do magic now?"

"I don't owe you an explanation for anything I do!" Janna nearly shouted. "You can just live with the mystery, and trust me that I'm doing the best I can, and that I'm a good deal more competent than you think I am."

Tom held up his hands. "I know you are. I just... I did the magic-detecting spell, and you... you were barely glowing at all."

"Yeah, that's what happens when you grow up in a magic-less wasteland and have to scrounge for scraps of magic to get anywhere. I'm less powerful than even – ugh! But that doesn't make me useless, or stupid."

"Yeah, I just figured... even the best of us needs help," Tom said.

"Sure. But the alligator couldn't understand you. You should've run your fireball strategy by me before you just blasted. Now... let's give this guy a proper funeral."

Star walked in silence with Eclipsa out of the Bureaucracy of Magic. Eclipsa opened a portal and they went through. They emerged in the Butterfly Castle throne room, on the dais. Eclipsa closed the portal, groaned, and collapsed into the throne. "Thank the Forces of Evil for good upholstery," Eclipsa groaned. "Where did Marcie get these cushions? I'll have to have them on all my chairs."

"And everyone else's," Star said, sitting on the floor in front of the throne. 

"Yes, that too."

Star thought for a moment, delaying her words until she got them right. "So... how is everything going? Uh... sorry about the Magic High Commission."

"They're not your fault," Eclipsa said. "They're just being the irritating busybodies they were created to be."

"And that stuff about your mom?"

"Just them being more irritating. I am done with my mother. I don't care what she would've done. She died a very long time ago."

"Yeah," Star said. She ran her fingers through her hair. "But..."

"Yes?"

"What about the Darkest Spell? What exactly... I've been wondering... how did you make it? How does it work?"

Eclipsa sighed. "Well. That's quite the story..."

Janna and Tom made a funeral for the crocodile, and sent him out into a trash filled lake. They didn't say much.

Then Tom said something dumb that had been weighing on him. "You know... this seems out of character for you."

"What?"

"You know, giving this guy a funeral. He was still magic, the body could've been useful. And during that slumber party a couple weeks ago, you said that when you'd die you'd want people to use your body, at least as fertilizer."

Janna shrugged. "Just because that's what I would want doesn't mean he'd want it. And people should be allowed to be what they want, even after death. And besides, he'll be food for anything that can live in this junk dimension."

Tom nodded. Janna sighed, and shook her head. "This talk is too heavy for a kid's show. Let's get back to looking for magical stuff, so I can power up and go on the run."

Tom frowned. "'Go on the run?'"

"Well, yeah, I don't want Star to learn how I know magic, so I'm not sticking around for her to interrogate me about all this."

"Don't worry about that," Tom said. "Your secret's safe with me."

"Really? Can you really keep a secret like that?"

Tom snorted. "Of course, dude! I'm great at secrets."

Janna shook her head. "Sure. But if you ever crack, I want advance warning." She tapped her fingers together and her cheekmarks disappeared. "Let's go get more magic stuff. And you know, if you see a lot of magic at once, tell me. It could be dangerous."

"Right," Tom said, and the two of them walked off into the sunset.

Chapter Text

"Well. That's quite the story..." Eclipsa started.

"Tell me! We don't have any meetings or anything for, like, thirty minutes. We're all clear."

Eclipsa nodded. "Very well. But..."

"What?"

"I made an awful decision. One I now realize was a terrible wrong. I don't... I have changed since then. Please don't think badly of the person I am now because of something I did in the past."

Star nodded seriously, thinking of a few things she regretted. "Yeah, don't worry. I'll be fine."

"Very well. I suppose it starts with my mother. She began the spell. She didn't know for sure, but the Forces of Evil could have been a lizard person, so she wanted a way to destroy them too. As well as kill any septarians she deemed useless. But no matter what she did, she couldn't come up with a spell to do that."

"Why not?"

Eclipsa shrugged. "Something was baked into the rules of the universe: do not hurt septarians. Except genuine old age, of course, but obviously my mother didn't want that. But even my mother had to follow the laws of magic."

"Huh. So how did you do it?"

"Well, unfortunately in this case, I was never all that good at following rules."

"So... what happened?"

"So. 'The Butterflys will quickly notice before it has the chance to spread.' How is that turning out?"

"Ugh, you quoted me exactly. Stop doing that!" A judgmental pause. "Give it time. It's not at a critical point yet. It can go a little further before we should even begin to worry."

"I don't care. It will take ages to teach her everything she needs to know, and even then it'll be a losing battle. The esteemed high princess couldn't plan her way out of an eggshell."

"Don't insult eggshells by putting her in them. But I still think we have plenty of time."

"... Mina Loveberry."

"Ugh, another her . What does she have to do with anything?"

"She is well-trusted by the Mewmans, including the royalty. She greatly admired Eclipsa's mother and held deep respect for her. She does not have strong magic outside her Solarian powers, and I know I could beat her if I wanted. And the communication block on Butterfly Castle wouldn't affect Mewni's top general. It'll be a risk, of course, but I can hardly knock on the main gate of Butterfly Castle and leave a message with the guards, can I?"

"You could, but you would probably be captured immediately and no one would believe you. And even with your illusions, the castle's wards would catch you were hiding something immediately, and whala, a mild inconvenience of a capture and no delivered message. I'm still trying to figure out if Eclipsa ever leaves the castle, but he's hiding the knowledge from me."

"That's... irritating."

"But there's other avenues we could pursue. We could try sending another ghost –"

"Eclipsa had a ghost-warding spell cast over Butterfly Castle and the Diaz house, which seem to be the only places Star has been frequenting when we try to contact her. It seems she's upgraded her security after my sibling's catastrophically stupid crusade."

A sigh. "Yeah, Necahua was an idiot –"

"Don't insult them."

" But I still don't think we need as much time as you think." A piano chord.

"...what are you doing? This is my office, how did you even fit a piano in here – no, I don't want to know."

"Coming up with an awesome victory song! Or perhaps a funeral dirge. I haven't decided yet."

"...wonderful. If you have no objections..."

"Oh, I have plenty of those. But not for this. At the very least, it'll make things interesting."

Solaria thought of herself as a good mother. And a good mother would involve her daughter in every facet of her job, to pass on the knowledge to the next queen. 

So that was how Eclipsa found herself observing Solaria throw attempt after attempt at a spell to kill septarians – or lizards, as Solaria called them – at a young septarian.

Said teenager was bound and chained and muzzled, and was learning quite a bit about regeneration during his stay with the Mewmans. First Solaria kept draining him of blood, and recently she had been throwing every single spell she could come up with at him to see if any of them stuck.

It was very bloody. Eclipsa, however, was used to blood. She had been at her mother's side through quite a lot. And it was only by sheer coincidence that she'd started to disagree with her.

Plus, his blood wasn't red, so that helped. It helped Eclipsa, anyways.

Solaria glanced at Eclipsa. "We captured this rebel a long time ago. They even recruit their young. Disgusting." I have a new spell I'd like to show you, Eclipsa. Perhaps you can write it in your chapter of the book. Black Velvet Inferno!"

A blast of dark purple light and red butterflies arced towards the child. He would have done something to get free or at least seem cool in the face of danger, but he had long given up on that, and the taught chains prevented him from moving much. He could only glare at Solaria, eyes full of tears.

The dark purple light enveloped him in a sphere of darkness. He closed his eyes as the sphere cracked and flooded with a chilling lavender light.

The sphere shattered and fell to the floor, leaving a tattered scrap of clothing and some ash. Solaria stared at the scrap with an even glare and waited.

The ash twitched, and the boy regenerated... outside his chains. He ran for Solaria. He had long given up hope of escaping, but perhaps this time he could stop her –

The chains slithered through the air and reattached to his arms, legs, tail, and neck. The muzzle reformed. The boy stood frozen, inches away from Solaria. His eyes were still filled with tears. 

Solaria hadn't so much as blinked. "Look at this violent creature," she said. "So eager to destroy me, it didn't even think to run away. Not that that would have worked." She made a gesture, and the chains retracted, dragging him back to his spot in the center of the specially-made testing grounds. "Well. I'll come up with a new spell. We'll try again soon. It will be happier when I find the right spell."

"M – maybe we should talk to him," Eclipsa stuttered out.

"What?"

Eclipsa almost put a hand over her mouth. "Uh... we could... we could ask him... his weakness? He'll be happier if we do, right? So we can talk to him."

Solaria laughed. "Oh, Eclipsa, honey! I love your optimism, but... it can't even speak properly!"

Eclipsa squirmed under her mother's laughter, but... "Uh, it knows a little bit of Mewman, right? That could be enough."

"FIne, but stay away from its mouth. It can bite."

Eclipsa nodded. "Right. Of course" She stood hesitantly out of biting range, but close enough for him to read her facial expressions through his tired and blurry eyes.

Solaria released his muzzle. "Alright, Eclipsa. Talk to it. See if that does anything."

Eclipsa nodded. "Uh... Hello. What's... what's your name?"

The septarian child looked at her, confused. Solaria snorted.

Eclipsa gestured to herself. "I am Eclipsa."

A snort. "No."

"What?"

"...know I. Do not care."

"Oh. You?"

"Tet?"

"What?"

"What. That."

" What ?"

"What you is? What is you mean?"

"Oh, uh..." Eclipsa traced back the conversation. "I am Eclipsa," she said, speaking clearly and gesturing at herself. She then pointed at him. "You?"

"Ah... I am Miquiz."

Eclipsa smiled. In the background, Solaria muttered something about that being barely a name, but no one cared about her.

"So..." Well, Eclipsa did care about what Solaria thought, so I suppose it wasn't no one. But still, close to no one. "Uh, what... you regenerate – heal – get better – very well." She made a gesture she hoped communicated regrowing a limb. "How do you... uh, how are you so good at that?"

Miquiz would have very much liked to spit out the Mewman for the Septarian "cha'no" – practice – but he didn't know the word. "Do it lot," was the compromise.

"Oh, uh... oh. I suppose you've had a lot of practice," Eclipsa realized. "uh, sorry about that. My mother... she thinks you monsters would be happier, uh, dead. She's... she's trying her best."

"No."

"No?"

"'My mother' no. Not right. Monsters are not happier dead." He inclined his head at Solaria.

Solaria snorted. "You claim to be happier alive, but you can't even learn Mewman properly. I just want to end your tortured existence. It would be a mercy."

Miquiz stared at her, and then spat in her general direction. He then said, in a perfect Mewman accent, "Know 'monster', and 'dead', and ' explode them and spread the pieces far apart as possible. They are happier this way. ' Know New and Tiel Septasian, and Frogekt, and Trrgroth and even T'Septasis Tsalah. Would show you hand move if I can."

(New and Old Septarian, Frogian, Demonic, and Septarian Sign Language, for those curious. He offered to make a wonderful demonstration of his proficiency in SSL.)

Solaria frowned. "Of course you'd know the other monster tongues," is what she settled for. She tightened the chains, and put the muzzle back on. "Anyways, Eclipsa, your effort was valiant, but I don't think it was working. Let's go find another spell."

Eclipsa nodded, not willing to argue with her mother, and left. But she stole a glance back at Miquiz.

A fresh spring. Mina hadn't had water since the last fresh spring, but considering this fresh spring looked identical to the last one she'd seen, despite traveling in what she thought was a straight line, she was not about to consider that a victory.

She sighed, and got out her fancy new rabbit-hide water pouch and filled it up. Or at least she thought it was a rabbit hide. The thing she had killed to make it didn't look like a rabbit, but it tasted like one, so she counted it.

And then a voice, from behind her. "Loveberry." Mina whirled around, and looked into the mist. 

"Who's there? Show yourself!" Mina shouted. Although, if she recognized that voice, she knew that they'd never give her a straight fight.

"No."

Yes, it was definitely them . Ugh. "You haven't talked to me in, what, months? Nearly a year? And here you are, after leaving me to stumble around all alone in these mountains?"

"Essentially, yes."

"What do you want."

The Forces of Evil didn't speak immediately. Mina thought about asking again, but they finally talked. "I admit I was never planning to let you go. But circumstances have changed."

"You do realize that I don't intend on going along with your plans."

"Even if it meant the destruction of the Multiverse?"

" What ?"

A sigh, but she could tell somehow it wasn't aimed at her. If it was, she would be able to tell because somehow, some way she'd have found them and beaten them into the ground. "The Butterfly queens messed with dark magic, and it's poisoning the Multiverse. Everything will die very soon if we don't reverse it. I just need them to know about it."

"Right," Mina said, rolling her eyes. "Because this isn't part of one of your schemes." While she couldn't think of a reason for them to release her that didn't line up with their story, she could bet they could think of one. "I know you, Forces of Evil. You hide in the shadows, never a straight-up fight. Because you know if you'd fight me or any of my queens, even low-tier ones like Dirhhenia or Jushtin, you'd lose."

"Oh, you're absolutely right. I could never win a battle of strength. But strength isn't everything, which you and your queens could use a reminder of once in a while. Case in point." A three-dimensional map appeared in front of her, showing a strange golden planet with huge streams of golden liquid flowing up and into space from its surface. A dark stain appeared on it, slowly creeping across its surface. "I believe you've already heard of Eclipsa's Darkest Spell. Magic like the Butterflys have used is a fundamental contradiction. It recently reacted with the pure magic of the Realm of Magic. This reaction will spread across the Realm of Magic and into the surface worlds, destroying everything it touches. It'll reach the Wand's stream first, and from there all of Mewni. I've written the exact nature of this reaction down, but it's... not easily translated to Mewman. I can show you myself and my team of scholars' work, if that helps."

Mina frowned. "...what?"

"Bottom line is, we have eight to ten years, if we're extremely lucky and it doesn't spread exponentially. If it does, well, we're all as good as dead. I have not and will not ever have the opportunity to properly test it, so at this point I have no idea how fast it will spread." A pause, and Mina imagined them pushing reading glasses up their stupid snout. She'd never expected the Forces of Evil to be such a nerd . "But, essentially, if we don't act as soon as possible, we're all dead." The darkness on the map in front of her spread across the planet and into the wells, replacing them with an empty nothingness .

Mina blinked. "So... you're saying... there's an evil darkness from one of Eclipsa's spells that's going to destroy everything?"

"...yes. And you don't have to take my word for it. Tell the High Princess to open a portal to the Realm of Magic and see for herself. She's progressed far enough to do that. The darkness is near the largest mountain range, and it's spreading fast. I don't have the power to stop it, but the High Princess does. And make no mistake, I don't want to free you. I'm simply turning to the last resort, since I don't have many options."

"You don't have any other lost Mewmans wandering around this place?"

"No."

"Ugh. Let me guess, you killed them?"

" I didn't. They weren't as good at survival as you were, and I wasn't about to help them."

"... is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"No, it isn't. Really, I don't like you and you don't like me. We both know that. But we're going to have to work together if we want the entire multiverse to not die."

"Fine. Just get me out of here."

"Very well," Toffee said, and the mists cleared and a mountain dematerialized in front of her, to reveal a wall about fifteen feet away. The wall around the Mountains of Incurable Anguish. 

"You mean I've been this close to the exit this WHOLE TIME? F –"

Toffee, unseen by Mina, stifled a laugh. It was only polite, after all.

The next time she saw Miquiz, it was a considerably happier moment. Eclipsa had just finished her date with Cíaxoch, and while it was more awkward than me at a Glossaryck convention, it did get her thinking. So she grabbed some chicken from the castle kitchens, and crept through a few secret passageways to bypass the heavily guarded door to the testing chamber.

Someone was saying something in Septarian as Eclipsa approached. Eclipsa looked through the vents, but he was alone and still bound, sitting with his arms over his head and watching little dust motes be blown around by the chamber's air vents. If he ever got free of his magical chains, he'd take those air vents to freedom.

When Eclipsa's coming changed the flow of dust in the air, he glanced up and noticed her. He made a snorting sound through his muzzle. 

"Uh, hello," Eclipsa said, jumping down to the floor and holding out the plate of chicken. "I brought some food for you."

Miquiz was suddenly grateful the muzzle obscured most of his face, because he couldn't help but look extremely desperate. No one gave him food; Solaria wanted to see how long septarians could go without sustenance. The answer was a very, very long time, but it didn't stop Miquiz from being extremely hungry. And the chicken was food he could actually eat and get actual nutrition from, unlike the wheat rolls the occasional guard who realized how messed up this whole ordeal was would sneak him. (He ate them anyways. He needed something to fill his stomach.) Eclipsa clearly knew her way around monster diets.

Eclipsa put the plate down, and hesitantly walked towards the chained-up kid. "If I free your mouth and hands, will you try to hurt me?"

Miquiz shook his head quickly. Eclipsa, now armed with the knowledge of what young septarians looked like, realized he had to be younger than her in Septarian years. "Uh... okay. Right." She reached up and undid the muzzle. True to his shaken head, Miquiz didn't try to bite.

She moved on to his hands, and when they were free, he reached for the chicken. The chain around his neck stopped him, so Eclipsa pushed the plate closer and, to be careful, stepped out of range of his sharp, untrimmed claws.

He bolted down the chicken, not caring if he looked dignified or not.

"Hey, slow down," Eclipsa said. "You'll hurt yourself if you eat too much at once."

Miquiz shrugged and continued eating at the same pace. "Do not care."

Eclipsa laughed weakly. "Your funeral, I guess." She then winced at her phrasing, but Miquiz didn't seem to mind. Either that or he didn't know what "funeral" was referring to. "Okay... uh, so... I'm not going – I'm not like my mother."

"Know that."

Eclipsa nodded. "Yeah. I think – I... what's your plan for getting out of here?"

"Wait. Hope Un – the Force find me before your mother knows how to dead me."

"Who?"

"One your mother is looking for. She does call them evil."

"The – you think they're still looking? You've been locked up here for a long time, and they haven't come for you."

"Many happen. Many because your mother. I am in Butterfly Castle. They have many to do. But they know I am here."

Eclipsa shook her head. "My mother will stop if we can defeat them, the Forces of Evil. But we don't know who they are. They could be a septarian, and we don't know how to kill septarians."

"Not going to tell you," Miquiz said, sticking his tongue out.

"Yes, but how do you do all this? No matter what she does, you're fine. My mother has been starving you for over half a year, and you're still fine."

"Thick tail. Keeps energy."

"Your tail isn't thick anymore!" Eclipsa said, glancing at it. True to her words, it was stick thin, along with the rest of him.

"Fine. Our cítalia talk with magic. Magic listen. None can hurt us."

"What does that mean?"

"Get me out and I tell you."

Eclipsa hesitated. "I don't want to be a part of doing this to you... but I don't know how to get you out of here."

"Off the chains. Go through hole you did. Get out of here."

"I can't! My mother would be so angry."

"Do not care."

"Yes, but I do! She's my mother!"

Miquiz looked unimpressed. "And? She is evil."

"Yes, but she's my mother! Don't you have someone you love despite everything?"

"Yes. Good people. Good people not dead more good people."

Eclipsa thought for a moment, and then nodded. "I suppose you're right. You... you don't deserve this."

"So off the chains," Miquiz replied. "Get me out."

"I don't –"

Voices outside. Eclipsa yelped. One of the voices was definitely her mother.

Miquiz made gestures towards his remaining chains. "You can help –"

Eclipsa didn't free him. No, she replicated her mother's hand gestures and locked him back up. "I'm sorry." She grabbed the empty plate and rushed back towards the vents. She struggled to climb up to the air vent. She finally reached the vent grate –

But a key was turned, and Solaria entered the room. Eclipsa shoved the plate in the vent and dropped down, smiling with what she hoped was innocence.

Solaria frowned. "Eclipsa?! What are you doing here?"

Eclipsa sweated. "Uh, you see... uh, I was practicing some spells on him. Just, none of them worked, you know." 

"Eclipsa, you know this monster is dangerous! You should have practiced those spells with me here!"

"Yes – but –"

Solaria shook her head and walked up to Eclipsa. "Eclipsa, sweetheart, I've tried to shelter you from the responsibility of becoming queen, because I love you. But because of that, you aren't very good at protecting yourself. If your spell dislodged the chains, would you be able to defend yourself from that lizard?"

Eclipsa shrugged. "I don't know. I've never been in battle before. But I'm applying myself in my studies, I definitely am, and –"

"Eclipsa, I assure you that when I'm done being queen, you will never have to be in battle ever," Solaria said. "And I'd like you to lend me the Royal Magic Wand. I'll need it in the coming fight."

Eclipsa looked at Solaria. "What? What's happening?"

"I have laid a trap for the Forces of Evil, and I shall finally put an end to that monster once and for all," Solaria said grandly.

"You – but if they are a sept – uh, lizard, how will you defeat them?"

"If they are a lizard, then Miquiz here will get a new cellmate, and I'll experiment on something even stronger."

Eclipsa glanced at Miquiz. He was glaring at Solaria. Even seemed to follow her words. Eclipsa couldn't help but admire him. After all, he knew so many languages, and, well. She would never learn Septarian.

"In the meantime," Solaria said, "why don't you go and get some sleep? I'll show you more spells in the morning. One of them might even work."

"Yes, mother," Eclipsa replied.

They would meet one more time after that, where Eclipsa would officially hand off the Wand to Solaria. Solaria would describe her plan in more detail, and then go off, sure of her victory, and capture the Forces of Evil.

Except she wouldn't capture them.

And Eclipsa would never see her mother again.

Mina went to Butterfly Castle first. She was aware that her long stint as a survivalist had made her look like one of the Forces's monsters, but she didn't care. She had to get to Moon, to... she didn't know. Tell her the Forces's message, she supposed. Then it wouldn't be up to her what was done with it.

She stormed through Butterfly village, and noticed that things looked like they had recently been repaired, or at least renovated, but she dismissed it. A lot could have happened while she was away. She also noticed... a monster. Standing in a shop with NO MONSTERS ALLOWED hastily scribbled out on a sign in the front. What? How could a monster be that audacious?

Whatever. She didn't care. She had to get to Moon. She would come back to show that monster the fear of Glossaryck later. She had to get to Moon.

She walked to the Castle itself. She banged on the gates. A thankfully Mewman guard popped his head out from the command tower. He started a spiel on how she was late, she should've come during petitions, but stopped in his tracks when he saw who it was. "G – General Loveberry?" 

"Let me in."

"Of course!"

The gates opened, and the guard ran out to greet her, talking about how he was such a fan, and how everyone had been so worried, and how did she escape?

Mina ignored him. "Take me to Moon."

"Yes, yes, ma'am, but –"

"But what ?" Mina asked.

"Yes, ma'am. Right away ma'am."

The next time Eclipsa would see Miquiz was, if it were possible, under worse circumstances. Her mother had just been laid to rest, and though Eclipsa was certain she would never rest peacefully, no ghost of hers had ended up in the Underworld. Eclipsa demanded that the demons take time off the wars Solaria had started and Eclipsa would now continue to search for her. No matter how many times they said that the pull of Lady Life was stronger for queens like her, Eclipsa refused to believe she was gone forever.

Because she hadn't even had the chance to say goodbye. 

But she would continue her mother's work. She would make her proud, when she finally saw her again. She would do something – she would make sure that Solaria would still love her.

(When it mattered, you could only do it halfway. You kept in contact with Globgor, and you're slowly beginning to realize that you did that for a reason. An important reason. She would hate that. She would hate you.)

Which was why Eclipsa had to complete her mother's magnum opus: the spell that could kill the unkillable. She didn't go to test any prototypes on Miquiz, who probably didn't even know Eclipsa was queen yet. No, she thought about what had been said between them. She thought about magic. And she thought about how the strange cat fairy that had evaluated her for her queenly abilities had said she was the strongest magic-user in centuries.

"Our cítlia talk with magic. Magic listen. None can hurt us."

She knew what she had to do.

"Glossaryck!" Eclipsa shouted, opening the Magic Book of Spells.

Glossaryck floated out, a grim expression on his face. "Hello, Eclipsa."

"Look, I know it's a lot to ask, but... just as the book has a spirit, you, and the tunnels have awareness, does... does magic itself have a consciousness?"

Glossaryck grinned. "Why, yes. Clever of you to figure that out. Anything with enough magic has a mind. And magic definitely has enough magic."

"Could I communicate with it?"

"Also yes," Glossaryck said. "Just bring your wand to the Magic Sanctuary, and with your power you should be able to tunnel into the core of the Realm of Magic in no time."

"Great! I'll do that, then," Eclipsa made to leave, but Glossaryck told her to wait.

"Are you sure... are you sure this is what you want?"

"Yes," Eclipsa said. "I am sure."

"Just... I haven't done the best job at keeping up with the place. It will – would be really easy to mess things up. And then nothing ends well."

Eclipsa nodded. "I won't mess things up" Big words, for a little high queen.

Glossaryck did not look convinced, but Eclipsa was already gone and far from seeing his frowny "oh-no-I-enabled-someone" sadface.

Mina followed the guard into the castle. She was surprised when he brought her not to the throne room, but the hospital wing. Was Moon visiting the sick? Was she sick?

She walked into the hospital wing, and the guard gestured to a bed. Mina gasped. It was worse than she thought. Moon was covered in bandages, around one side of her face and her arms and legs. "Queen Moon?" she asked, walking up to the bed. 

Moon looked. She gasped. "Mina! You're back! How did you –"

"Hey, we'll get to that later. What happened to you?"

"That's a very long story. Dark magic. Really, what happened to you in the Mountains? How did you get out?"

"Uh... also a long story, my queen. What happened to the kingdom while I was gone?"

"Well..." Moon decided to ease Mina into all of... it. "Star has gained an interest in some humanitarian efforts. Her magic's coming along beautifully, too. She can now enter her butterfly form at will, and cast quite a few spells without the wand."

"Ha! That's awesome news, my queen. I can't wait to see it in action. But will she really need to know spells without the wand? I mean... she should know, I guess, but isn't she a little young to learn wandless magic? Though, I bet she's doing great ruling the kingdom while you're recovering."

"She is young, yes. But..." Moon trailed off.

"But?"

"Well, about Eclipsa..."

"Oh no. What did she do?" Mina asked, recalling the Forces of Evil telling her about how Eclipsa's magic was poisoning the Realm of Magic.

"Well, we did some digging, and it turns out... the throne was stolen from her and her family. Festivia wasn't her daughter, a half-monster girl named Meteora was."

"Yeah, already knew that. What difference does it make?" Mina said dismissively. "Eclipsa is living proof that greatness isn't genetic. And any half-monster spawn she would produce would be worse than her."

"It does matter. Eclipsa is the rightful queen! So Star... she gave the wand and the kingdom to her."

" What ?!" Mina demanded. "What kind of brain-dead idiot would give everything in Mewni to the Queen of Darkness ?"

"Star would. And I – I think she was right. Eclipsa has some hurdles to overcome, but she is doing a fine job."

"Oh? Is that why Mewni village looks like it took a vacation to the Underworld? Is that why there was a monster in a perfectly respectable shop? Is that why –"

"The destruction was not caused by Eclipsa. It was there before she became queen. If you must know, it was because of a problem I completely failed to solve. Star did her best, too, but Eclipsa was the one who truly ended the conflict."

"And the monsters ?"

"Perhaps they have just as much a right to be here as Mewmans do."

Mina stared at Moon. "...how dare you. You should be fighting this. Need I remind you of your mother ? Her peacemaking ways were stupid and they got her killed by the very people she was trying to help."

Moon met Mina's stare evenly, though one eye was slightly puffy. "I do not appreciate you calling my mother stupid. She was a ruthless strategist in her own right. But your words hold all the monsters accountable for the actions of just one. I have learned that many monsters are good people despite what was done to my mother."

"This will be the ruin of the kingdom! You're supposed to be fighting this!"

"No it won't, and I'm hardly in a shape to fight much of anything, by my own fault. Not Eclipsa's."

Mina's face hardened, eyes growing cold and mouth tightening. "The Forces of Evil has a message for you... but I don't think you'll ever hear it," she said, and stalked out of the hospital wing.

Eclipsa brought the wand to the Magic Sanctuary. She looked around, and went up to the well. "How do I activate this...?" she wondered. She thought for a moment and stuck her wand into the well. Then the whole building started shaking. "Oh no."

Golden goo erupted out of the well and wrapped itself around Eclipsa. She yelped as it dragged her down into the well.

Down, down, and into the choking darkness. She could not breathe. She managed to keep hold of the wand, and that counted as a victory.

But her grip was slipping. She couldn't breathe!

Minutes passed by as the magic dragged her down. Black dots swam in her vision, and soon they expanded and obscured her vision entirely. Her lungs tried to gasp in air, but there was none.

Eclipsa didn't remember much after that. Until she came to in a strange place.

Strange was one way to put it, definitely. It seemed to be a place, and a person, and so much else at the same time. Eclipsa tried to map out what she was seeing, but she couldn't. It was a cave with golden walls cracked at the edges, it was the fleshy ventricle of a heart riddled with cancer made of crumpled paper, it was a book with no words and every word and everything. It was a void and an everything all at once.

Eclipsa stopped trying to understand it. That would not help, clearly. Instead, pulling herself together quite literally, she stood, hand firm on the wand, and shouted something that she hoped would attract the spirit's attention. She poured all her anger and hatred into her words, and they echoed in arcs of purple and spiny stones. Emotions swirled around her.

It definitely attracted some form of attention. The spirit turned its many blind eyes on her, and said something in a tongue that made her ears hurt. Eclipsa groaned against the storm, and brandished the wand. She did something that once was Midnight Shriek, into the spirits center.

Bewilderment, slowly turning into rage. Eclipsa hoped she was reading it right, but she wasn't sure if she should have put human emotions onto... this.

Eclipsa blasted her surroundings with arcs of magic, power echoing through the... place. It whirred in annoyance and tried to push her away.

Eclipsa refused to be cowed. "Black Velvet Inferno," she said, and a sphere of dark purple light formed in the building. It encircled bits and pieces of the... thing, so that it was both inside and outside the sphere. The sphere cracked, and flooded with pale light, and shattered. Bits of the magic realm was gone.

That did it. The Realm of Magic, now as irrationally angry as a human might be with a mosquito or a particularly deep-biting fly, and now as confused by who exactly was attacking it, flooded the area with an indiscriminate bolt of destruction.

Which was exactly what Eclipsa was hoping for. She used a containment spell to capture a sample of the magic around her, and then opened her parasol and used its power to fly her the heck out of there

The Realm of Magic, confused and sickly as it was, contradicted itself so easily.

...

Eclipsa used the dark magic she had gathered to develop a new spell. It stained her arms black and dark purple, but it was worth it. She now had a spell that could destroy anything.

The next time Eclipsa would see Miquiz was under the worst possible circumstances.

She strode into the testing chamber, using the door this time, and Miquiz stood there. She brushed past the guards to the chamber, not noticing how they glanced at each other, and at the entourage of demons following her.

She strode into the testing chamber, and stared at Miquiz. He stared back at her, fearless despite his obvious disadvantage. He thought she couldn't hurt him. The black scars on her arms proved that he was wrong.

She aimed her wand. "I call the darkness onto me, from deepest depths of earth and sea." Dark clouds gathered. Miquiz frowned from behind the muzzle. This was new.

"From ancient evils unawoken, break the one who can't be broken." The crystal at the end of Eclipsa's wand darkened with liquid dark magic. The demon entourage she'd brought fanned out from behind her.

"To blackest night I pledge my soul, and crush my heart to burning coal." Miquiz, despite his attempts to be fearless, trembled as dark lightning forked through the room. At the very least, a spell like this would hurt.

"To summon forth a deadly power to see my hated foe devoured!" Black veins arced through Eclipsa's arms as she aimed her wand. A dark blast consumed Miquiz's heart. It fell to the floor and disappeared in a puff of black smoke.

He whimpered in pain from behind his muzzle, and tried desperately to regrow his heart. But the flesh disintegrated into dark, ashy butterflies. He kept trying, but it was not enough.

He gasped in pain as his blood stopped moving through his body. He tried to remember the techniques Una had taught him to keep blood moving through the body, to cauterize the wound, to heal, but it wouldn't really help without the heart, would it?

The last thought that went through his mind was I'm sorry. I never came back . He collapsed, and death was not far behind.

Eclipsa watched him die, and her hand instinctively went to her mouth. The demons around her looked disturbed. They, better than almost anyone else in the room, could tell that a child was dying in front of them. The two, one guard stared at Miquiz as he died, and cursed themself for not being able to save him in time. Somewhere else, someone almost got stabbed with a Solarian warrior's blade as they felt the number of Anguished Ghosts unexpectedly increase by one.

Eclipsa turned away. She couldn't stop shaking. This was supposed to make everything better. It was supposed to prove that she was devoted to her mother. It was supposed to make everything better .

But she couldn't help but think it just made everything worse.

And regret had come too late to save a life.

The room shook as Miquiz materialized, roaring into view with the power of an unfair, recent murder. He flew for Eclipsa and the wand, and the demons around her got over their hangups and went to work containing him and bringing him to the Underworld.

Eclipsa watched it happen, and felt her eyes bristle with tears. What had she done? What had she done?

She knew her mother would be proud of her.

She knew now that was no comfort.

Mina always had a problem with being too brash, not thinking things through. She wasn't like – well, she wasn't like her vision of Solaria, a perfect planner and plotter, tying everything together with her intelligence and unbridled passion. She'd always relied on her strength. She needed someone good at thinking if she ever was going to beat Eclipsa. And she was good at moving sneakily, and silently. So she stuck into a darkened structure in the dead of night, searching for something. And she found it.

"Please," she whispered. "I know you hate this too. If Eclipsa's monster progeny is allowed to take the throne, you'll lose everything."

"Not necessarily," a voice responded. Mina flinched at their loudness, but the closest people happened to snore like a truck, so she needn't have worried.

"Actually, this is perfect. I've always liked Eclipsa. And she likes me. I don't think I've lost anything; in fact I think I've won."

Mina growled. "But we both know where this is going. You can't keep this up forever. And I don't think you will. She's too clever for that. It's already been set in motion, her pawn told me as much. And when they ruin everything you've built, you'll come running to me."

"I'll... consider it."

Star stared off into the distance as Eclipsa finished her story, tears once again welling in her eyes. "Gosh, Eclipsa, I..."

"You know the worst thing?"

"What?"

"I never visited him. Never got the chance to... but I wouldn't have gone either way. I don't know... he... I don't want to come face-to-face with everything I've done."

Star frowned, and looked for a way out of this. She didn't want to think about Eclipsa being... evil. She had to think of something different. "So... how did they find out?"

"Who?" Eclipsa asked.

"The Forces of Evil. They seemed to know what the spell was, how it worked, in my mom's story about her fight with them. Did Mocel tell them, or..."

"Mocel? Never heard of her. But... when the safehouse was overrun, and I and my family were captured, I begged Mina to free me. After my first and only use of the spell against a living being, I set an embargo on it so it could only be shared it something of equal value was given to me. So I offered it to Mina. But she didn't want it. The capture of me was more important to her than even the destruction of every septarian in Mewni. And she taunted me about how if the Forces of Evil ever found out about what I'd done, they'd hate me."

"And...?"

"They heard her. They had come back from evacuating everyone to get us to safety. I saw them standing there. When they'd heard what Mina said, they just... left. Without us."

"What? They left you? Just like that?"

"They left the person who'd developed a death spell and killed a child in cold blood with it. They're... they won't ever forgive me for that. And I don't think they should."

Star looked down at her feet. "Yeah... I guess."

"I don't know how to change what I've done. But... I do know... I've paid for it. Maybe that's enough."

It wasn't, and they all knew it. All the suffering in the world would not fix anything. It would not bring him back.

"Okay, Star, firstly, I'm really, really thankful that you decided to go to me instead of breaking in. Because I know you thought about it, and that would be, like, really stupid."

"Wow, you really know me that well, don't you," Star said, laughing awkwardly. "Thanks for getting me into this high-security facility, though."

"No problem," Tom said, and gestured to a door Star had nearly walked past. "It's this one."

Star stopped walking and faced the door. She took a breath. "Okay. This is it."

"Just, you know, don't upset the patient. Be cool."

"I will, don't worry," Star said.

She opened the door, and stepped into the room. Inside was a bed with a white sheet covering the shape of a body. And sitting in the chair next to the bed was a ghostly young septarian, reading a book in Mewman. He looked up as she stepped in.

"Hey, Miqiuz."

Chapter Text

Star, carrying an enormous photo album, knocked on Miquiz's door. "Uh... you there, dude?"

No answer, but the door opened on its own. Star stepped in.

Miquiz was sitting in his usual chair, reading another book, in Demonic this time. He was also reading it upside-down, what a cutie. Star didn't notice it was upside-down, because she didn't know a lick of Demonic and also she's stupid.

“So... uh... I was wondering iiiif I could talk with you about... this nice vacation we just took! Like, I'm sure you'd want to be updated."

Miquiz shrugged, and looked up from his book. He made a few casual signs, but Star didn't understand him.

Star decided not to say anything about his lack of speech. She wasn't sure if he understood her, but he still seemed to follow her words fairly well. And it was nice to talk to someone who wouldn't demand she work on whatever problem she was venting about.

"Well, uh... I got this boring old photo album of Tom's baby pictures to look at, but first I gotta talk about how I got this bad boy." Star spun the photo album, and then instantly regretted it as the enormous size of the photo album caused her to fumble and drop it.

"Heh," Star said, as she scrambled to pick it up. "Uh... I totally meant to do that."

Miquiz narrowed his eyes, though his face didn't stray from a polite smile. It reminded her of someone ...

"Riiight. So Tom, he was... he was going on vacation for Stump Day, and he invited a bunch of us to his cabin a few weeks ago. So we've been planning this for a while. He said it was totally going to be fun, it's a really big lakeside house. Even if it was a lava lake. The demons have got these spells that stop us normal people from burning alive on the lava and stuff. So it's perfectly safe."

Miquiz nodded. Star continued. "There was only one problem, which was super obvious the moment we got there to head out..."

Tom quickly loaded everyone into his carriage. "Don't worry about space, just get in! It's bigger on the inside."

Everyone jammed into the carriage. Tom was right, it was bigger and even a little fancier on the outside, but getting in was still a chore, especially when Tom's mother stepped in. She sat without complaint, and motioned everyone to hurry and find their seats.

"Seriously, why do we have to get moving this fast, again?" Marcie asked, stowing her meticulously packed bag under her fancily engraved seat, Nachos sleeping in her portable stable beside her. "In my family, it takes us hours to get on the road. We've barely been here ten minutes and we're already almost ready to go." 

"Planning!" Dave, Tom's father, said. "We totally have a plan for today, and we're running late! It's not your fault, though. No. We've just got to get moving!"

"Right..." Marcie said, looking around. She's a smart girl, that Marcie.

"Also, we've got to beat traffic! Everyone's going to be on their way to their cabins and stuff," Dave continued.

"Dude, we're flame-teleporting there," Janna pointed out, joining Marcie on the skepticism bandwagon and her side of the carriage, the other side being mostly taken up by Wrathmelior. "Right? You guys know how to teleport using flames, right?"

Tom nodded. "Yes, yes, of course we do! We're totally doing that. Dad's just... worried about the conditions for flame teleporting. Right, Dad?"

"Yes! Yes, of course. You know, I don't always understand this demon stuff, and I say weird things. I'm still a lowly Mewman noble, after all."

Janna looked unconvinced, and Marcie raised an eyebrow.

"Hey, hey, why are we doubting our gracious hosts?" Star asked, placating. "This is a really nice carriage. Where'd you get it?"

"Oh, I made it," Tom said. "It was originally to take you to the Blood Moon Ball, but when that fell through, I just kinda kept it around."

Star chuckled. "That's so interesting, Tom? So, uh, what spells did you use to –"

"Lady Lucitor's luggage has been put in the back!" one of the escorting guards shouted to Dave and Wrathmelior.

"Finally!" Dave said, visible relief on his face. "Let's get going!"

Wrathmelior agreed with Dave, and as fast as flame, they were at Tom's lake house.

Miquiz made a "go on" gesture. Or at least Star guessed that was what it was. Star nodded, and continued.

The Lucitor's cabin was so big every single person there – Janna, Star, Marcie, Jackie, and Kelly – could have their own room. Kelly felt that it was almost too big to be called a cabin. "More of a really, really fancy lake house."

"Semantics," Janna said, pocketing some ornate hearth decorations. "These'll pay for college for sure."

Marcie, who had finally gotten Nachos to stay in her stable in Marcie's room while she went to talk with the girls (and Tom), handed Star a cornshake from the cabin's cornshake machine.

Star sighed in relief, slurping her cornshake. "I needed a calm holiday where nothing happens," she said. "It's Stump Day, so Eclipsa is throwing a party to honor the stump, but the stump'd burn up out here. I can just relax and get away and not have to worry about befriending anyone or doing anything at all."

Tom plastered on a grin. "Yeeeeah! Nothing weird going on at all!"

Marcie frowned, and opened her mouth, but Kelly made eye contact and shook her head, so Marcie didn't say anything. Janna raised an eyebrow.

Tom coughed. "Who wants to go lava surfing?"

Everyone lit up, and a quick change and re-application of Underworld-proof spells soon ensued, and they were off.

Star paused, and looked at Miquiz, who sat there, tapping his ghostly fingers on the book. 

"...So, uh, got any, uh... any comments?"

Miquiz did what Star interpreted as some weird half interpretive dance, but in reality was just SSL.

"Right. Uh. I'll... I'll take that as a no. Continuing!"

It should go without saying that lava is very different from water. Yet certain people keep needing to be reminded of that. Water is melted ice. Lava is melted rock. The temperature difference is huge. Lava will not only kill you if you touch it, it will also set you on fire and kill you if you get too near to it. Yes, you don't even have to touch it for it to burninate you. Lava is terrifying, which is why one should never go near Hawai’i. That and all the tourists.

What was I talking about? Oh, yes. Lava. Lava also is not textured like water. It's more like an incredibly chunky death milkshake. I mean, there are universes out there where lava is basically glowing orange water, but this is not one of them. So surfing on it was a weird experience. The surfboards were strangely designed to accommodate that, and even Jackie, who was good at surfing in Earth's oceans, was out of her depth. Heh, depth.

But Tom was eager to give them lessons. To, Marcie thought, distract them, from whatever was going on.

"See, lava is less like water, and more like really chunky cornshake, so you have to surf on it differently," Tom was saying, coaching Jackie. Can I borrow your homework, Tom?

Marcie frowned, and looked to Dave and Wrathmelior. She sidled up to them. "So... there doesn't really seem to be an itinerary for this trip... what was your plan, exactly?"

"Uh... have as much fun as possible!" Dave said. He was sweating. Either the fire magic was wearing off, or Marcie had him in a tight spot.

"But we would have more fun in the beginning if you weren't rushing us. You gave us no time for even witty banter!"

"You could totally do witty banter here, at our beautiful lake house!" Dave said.

Wrathmelior growled something in Demonic.

"Yeah, you're right, darling. Yeah, we totally had to pay attention to the best times to teleport, according to Mewni's lava flows. Flame teleporting is an art and a science, after all."

"Yes..." Marcie said. "How does it work, exactly?"

Dave's eyes widened, and he and Wrathmelior looked at each other. "Uh... it's... uh..."

Marcie grinned, putting on her best innocently curious face.

Dave and Wrathmelior squirmed.

Miquiz and Star looked at each other. Miquiz tapped on his book.

"Aren't you at least going to ask me what happened next?" Star asked, after losing the staring contest.

Miquiz signed something, which Star didn't understand. She didn't know sign language, much less Septarian, but she was figuring out that Miquiz was trying to communicate with her.

"Uh... are you trying to... uh..." Star said, realizing. "Um... I don't understand your... gestures."

Miquiz rolled his eyes, made an exasperated hand gesture, and then used a more Mewman gesture to continue.

"Uh, okay," Star said. "Okay."

Marcie pressed them, and Wrathmelior began explaining to her in Demonic how the fire portals worked, but Dave stopped translating abruptly with an "Augh, I can't do this anymore!"

Marcie frowned, confused. Wrathmelior growled something.

"I know, I know, but I just can't! She wants to know what's going on, and I'm terrible at keeping secrets! If it was you who were terrible, we could do it, but I'm your translator! I have to talk! Ugh. Why do you have to be the one who's good at keeping secrets?"

Wrathmelior shook her head and smiled in gentle exasperation. She motioned him to go on, if he must. 

"Okay. The thing is, you cannot tell this to Star. Tom drilled into our heads that she deserves a nice, peaceful holiday. What with the power transition in Butterfly Castle, she's had no time to herself that doesn't involve constantly checking her phone and email and whatever else you kids or the Queen of Mewni use because Eclipsa has even less tech literacy than I have and she probably thinks sending a few emails is a good way to immediately notify someone of a dark abyss devouring the kingdom... or something. I forget what the exact words were."

"Tom really drilled that into your heads, didn't he."

"Yeah. Yes, he did," David said, scratching his ear nervously. "But please, listen to Tom's poorly paraphrased words. We need to keep Star happy. I'll tell you the problem, but if you're going to do anything, and I wish you would leave it to us adults, if you still do something, please wait until the vacation is over or do it on your own."

"Yeah," Marcie said. "Tell me what's going on."

Star took a deep breath. "And he clearly told her, but remember, this is a story about all of us, but mostly me! So I was –"

Miquiz was staring at her, unamused.

"Uh, I was totally suspicious, like, Janna and Marcie were super on Dave and Wrathmelior... and – and Tom's case earlier, but now they seemed to be, like, in on it now? I was so confused. And with confusion comes suspicion. So they were acting really sus... suspicious... and I..."

Miquiz was still staring at her, unamused.

"So I get suspicious, and I... I... what is it?"

Miquiz made a few signs, and then crossed his arms and stared at her.

Star groaned. "Come on, I know from Eclipsa's story that you know a little Mewman. Just tell me what's up."

Miquiz rolled his eyes. Then he got out of his chair, dropping his book, and phased through the wall.

"Hey!" Star shouted. "Come back here!"

No response.

Star walked out of Miquiz's room and to the room whose walls he'd floated through. 309, Mocel.

Grrrreeeeeaaattt, Star thought. She knocked on the door.

The door didn't open. Star waited, tapping her foot and huffing in impatience.

She was ready to knock again when the door finally opened. Star leaned in. "Heeey, Mocel... is –" Mocel was hovering right in front of her, arms crossed. "Is... uh..."

Mocel snorted, and floated away, turning her back on Star. "Is Miquizi here? Yes."

Star looked past Mocel. Miquiz was floating above her couch. He gave Star a weird look, and then turned to Mocel.

Mocel snorted. "You're quite the little primadona, aren't you."

Star frowned. "Uh, are you talking to me, or..."

"Of course I was talking to you! Who else would I be talking to? You Butterflys are all the same. You may claim to be above it all, but you can't take your heads out of your –" She glanced at Miquiz, and stopped. "You're so conceited and obsessed with yourself that you can't even realize that perhaps things have changed since Miquizi's incredibly traumatic death and he's communicating with you as best as he can. Because you don't know a lick of Septarian Sign Language, right? And you'll never learn it."

"What... I can learn! I'm no good at languages other than Mewman, but you can totally teach me, and I can teach Miquiz the rest of Mewman!"

Mocel looked unimpressed, and more than a little angry. "Just go away, you stupid Mewman girl. Go away, and while you're at it, check on your magic. You can't even be bothered to help Glossaryck maintain it, can you? Not that you'd be much help."

"W – what?"

"Check on your magic. You'll figure it out." Mocel closed the door in Star's face.

"What?" Star asked, staring at the door. She was so confused. " What ?"

The truth about the journey to the Underworld lake house, was that while Star may have been suspicious of Marcie, she never did act on her suspicions. Later, back in Butterfly Castle, Marcie would tell Star everything.

She told Star that the ghosts in the Underworld were upset. Something bad was happening somewhere, and it was destabilizing everything there. Dave said he'd never seen anything like it, and everyone was at least a little afraid. They had no idea what to do, but they knew they had to keep Star out of it for the holiday. Star couldn't take on the entire world, this was an Underworld-only issue.

When she heard that, Star sighed, and nodded. "I guess. I don't know if I'd be able to stop an Underworld problem. And Tom would tell me if he needed my magic, right?"

"I hope so," Marcie said.

"And I've got enough to do right now," Star said. "I need to focus on Eclipsa and the kingdom."

Marcie nodded. "You're right, Star. We can deal with this later."

And so the can was kicked further down the road, and into the darkness of a storm drain, where it would grow and fester and swell with the power of ignorance. Really, Star, you'd better hurry up with this. You're making me poetic.

We're going to... I'll go back to try to talk to Miquiz eventually. But I checked the unburned section of the library, and there's nothing that mentions that Septarians even have their own sign language. I don't know... how can I learn to communicate with him?

Chapter Text

Star grinned as she hung up a banner proudly proclaiming Welcome Monster Representatives! "This first Royal Monster Breakfast will have all the stops pulled, and the bottles popped, and… uh, cool things. It's gonna be awesome."

"Yes, I do plan on it,” Eclipsa said. “But you don't have to act like it's a big deal. We'll have plenty more like it. I want the monsters to feel comfortable at the royal table. The ones that came back, at least."

"Yeah..." Star said, looking aside. No septarians had come back from wherever in the Mountains they were. That included Shinjai. "So... uh, you were planning on doing this multiple times. Which is fine, my mom and dad ate breakfast on their own time, most of the time. But... I don't think this should, you know, trickle into the other meals."

"What do you mean?" Eclipsa asked.

"Yeah, what do you mean?" Marcie asked, peeking in the dining hall.

"I mean, you've still got to go to dinners with your advisors and everything," Star said seriously. And you can't have monsters and your advisors at the same table. There'd be no room."

Eclipsa shrugged. "Maybe I'm tired of listening to only Mewman advisors. Perhaps I want some more unusual ones too."

"What?"

"I'm using these meetings to scout out some new advisors! I have great respect for your mother, but she really did keep the most boring yes-men advisors you've ever heard drone on and on. Time to shake things up!"

"You're going too fast!" Star protested. "We still need to finish the castle, Mewmans still don't like you, there's so much we still need to do to make sure you keep this power! Replacing people in top positions with monsters will only make things worse!"

"Oh, Star, don't worry. I have the wand. I have plenty of magic. Power. You don't need to worry about me."

"But no one likes you!" Star said.

Eclipsa raised a brow. Marcie coughed.

"I – you know what I mean. All the Mewmans hate you! If you replace their jobs with monsters, they'll hate you even more!"

"When you're the Queen of Darkness, you get used to being hated. Now help me go over the guest list."

Star, Marcie, and Eclipsa stared in horror as the waiters placed the monster's dishes in front of their places at the table. Eclipsa turned to the waiter who was giving Star her plate. "Excuse me, why are you serving our guests dog bowls?"

The waiter looked at Eclipsa, then gestured to Star and Marcie. "Didn't give them dog bowls."

"Fine. Let me rephrase. Why are you serving our monster guests dog bowls?"

The waiter shrugged. "Don't they prefer it that way?"

"No! Of course not!" Eclipsa said. She shoved her perfect bowl of oatmeal – not even the most bigoted cook was brave enough to serve the Queen of Darkness a dog bowl – to the side. "I will not eat this breakfast until everyone is properly served. Go get proper dishes, or I will fire every last one of you and replace you with monsters."

The waiter looked a little fearful at that, but soon their snark returned. "Right, okay, I'll go get new plates. The monsters will only eat from the finest royal china."

"Yes, I would prefer that. None of us will eat until the plates are delivered."

A familiar horned toad monster hastily spat out some of her food, though she looked irate, muttering "first decent food in years, and I have to give it up because of some stupid semantics? Ugh."

"Don't worry, I'm sure the royal chefs and servers will work extra hard to make sure the food is prepared properly," Eclipsa said, as the frog's stomach rumbled.

"Yeah, sure, whatever," she said as the servers took her dog bowl away. "Wasn't even worth getting upset over. I'm hungry."

The head cook, one Rune Gop, upon hearing the news, turned to Manfred, pinching her nose. "I knew that was a bad idea from the start. You're lucky Eclipsa didn't blast everyone where she stood. If you weren't one rank above me, I'd have fired you a long time ago."

Manfred snorted. "And you don't approve of putting those monsters in their place? They were far more comfortable with the dog bowls, you know that."

Rune snorted. "What I don't approve of isn't up to me, unfortunately. But I sure as hell will take the fall for your stupid decisions. Now that the queen herself has ordered that the monsters be served on plates, I'll do my best not to offend her."

Manfred snorted. "Fine. Whatever." He plucked a berry from Eclipsa's oatmeal and ate it. "Just agree with me that Eclipsa is an awful queen."

"Can't. Unlike you, I have a brain."

Manfred growled, and turned away. "Fine, but you'd be –"

It happened so fast, Chef Gop didn't get a chance to actually process it before her sous chef, stationed at the end of the room, started screaming.

"Shut up, Janfred."

Manfred had turned to hard, unmoving stone.

Eclipsa, Star, Marcie, and most of the monsters heard the screaming, and most of them ran to see what was causing it.

"Oh dear," Eclipsa said, staring at the scene.

"I don't get it. What's wrong here?" a monster said.

"Oh no... the guy who made us eat out of dog bowls will shut up... how terrible..."

"He doesn't look any different. He's an... unmentionable, no matter how he's textured."

"Hey, at least this way he won't bother us."

"I definitely agree with you," Gop said, sighing. "But the problem is, he ate a berry out of Eclipsa's bowl. He wasn't the target. Eclipsa was." She studied the berries in the oatmeal. "Yada yada berries. I knew it. You eat one, and yada yada, they won't bother you any more."

Everyone gasped, except Eclipsa, who looked smug, and Marcie, who handed her a twenty. Star frowned. "Who would want to assassinate Eclipsa? She's doing everything right as queen!"

"Uh, in case you haven't noticed, Eclipsa's survived, like, twenty assassination attempts so far," Marcie said.

"That we know of."

"Right. We had a bet she'd have a peaceful day today. I knew I shouldn't have taken that bet. Of course someone would try to kill her on the first Royal Monster Breakfast."

"You take one step in the right direction and suddenly people hate you for it," Eclipsa said. "I'll survive."

"No. We have to find out who did this! So many people are trying to kill you, and you aren't doing anything about it?"

"I don't think there's much to do," Eclipsa said. "I only have limited energy, after all."

"Well, I have plenty of energy! Come on, Marcie! Let's go find an assassin."

"Do I have to –"

Star grabbed Marcie and dragged her out of there. "Come on, Marcie. Let's do this."

For a group that should've been clandestine, the assassin's guild was remarkably easy to find. They had an HQ, a tacky but surprisingly roomy shack complete with one of those weird inflatable tube people with several balloon knives and even balloon blood sticking out of it. Gross. No, I have never mistaken one of those inflatable tube things with a sapient creature. Much less tried to hold a conversation through interpretive dance. That's not me, I'm not that dumb.

My brother, however? He is that dumb. 

Heh, he is.

Anyways, the Assassin's Guild was easy to find, so they went there to start. And end. Unfortunate, that.

Star stormed in, ignoring Marcie's protest.

"Hello, welcome to the Assassin's Guild," the receptionist, a young bull monster with a thousand-yard Customer Service stare, said. "Who would you like to have bumped off today?"

"We're looking for a queen killer," Star said.

"I'm afraid we're all booked for that. Every assassin willing to take on that job and quite a few who aren't are already working on it. They're doing an admirable job at it, too."

Star snorted. "What? No, I'm looking for someone who already tried to kill Eclipsa. I'm working with her to find the culprit."

"Right, of course." She clicked through some files on her old, clunky computer. "Method?"

"Excuse me?"

The receptionist sighed. "What did they use for this attempted assassination?"

"Oh, right. Yada yada berries."

"Sure," the receptionist said. "Okay, we've got several attempted assassinations. None of them were successful, unfortunately. Which one were you looking for?"

"Any of them! We're trying to track down the assassins who tried to kill the queen."

"Look, there's a long list," the receptionist said. "Especially if we expand the list to everyone who tried to kill Queen Eclipsa. Just with yada yada berries, that's doable. But you can hardly track down and stop every single person who's tried to kill Eclipsa, or who paid someone to have her killed."

"I don't care. Show me."

The receptionist sighed, and turned her computer around.

"See, Star?" Marcie said, gesturing towards the long, long list of assassins and their clients. "You can't imprison everyone."

Star's face slowly morphed from a frown to a pensive expression.

"...can you?"

A clang of a metal door closing, and every last Mewman (and a few monsters, assassinating people was one of the few equal-opportunity jobs in Mewni) who had tried to kill Eclipsa was stuffed and locked in a hastily expanded dungeon. Star stood in front of the barred door. "All right, listen up!" she shouted. "Everyone here was on the list of assassins and clients who tried to get Eclipsa yada yada'd or otherwise bumped off. But only one of you put them in her oatmeal this morning. If you tell me who it is, you get a lighter sentence."

Crickets. "Wasn't me," someone muttered.

"Alright, we're doing this the hard way," Star said. She paused for dramatic effect. "You know, I expected better of Mewmanity. I know underneath it all, you're all good people. So one of ya made a mistake. I know you didn't really mean it. I understand things are tough for Mewmans these days."

A few mutters of agreement.

"I know. Life is hard! But you know what we Mewmans do? We survive!"

There were a few cheers.

"And we rebuild!"

"Yeah!" several people shouted.

"And we turn in the person who tried to poison Eclipsa!"

Multiple coughs.

"Come on! Eclipsa is not a bad queen!"

"Yes, she is! Her monster daughter's gonna inherit the throne!"

"Doesn't matter who tried to yada yada her! She's gonna off us all anyways!"

Star made a fist. A rainbow fist. "Okay, no! I made the right choice, I –"

"Star, stop," Eclipsa said, walking down the stairs to the dungeon, Marcie beside her. "I understand why they're angry. And I definitely understand why you're angry. But we can't imprison half the populace over a few assassination attempts. And to those people, I am asking you all to... give me a chance. To earn your trust. But I know that takes time, so for now..." Eclipsa took out a bobby pin, and unlocked the prison door. "You're all free to go." She used the royal magic wand to unlock any and all chains. "Sorry about all of this."

The crowd murmured to each other. "Man, I still don't trust her," someone muttered.

"Yeah. She's only doing this to make herself look better."

And maybe that's a good thing, Eclipsa thought to herself. Or maybe not. Who knows anymore.

"I cannot believe you did that!" Star near-shouted. "I spent all that time locking these people who wanted to kill you up, and you just let them go? These people want to yada yada you! Or worse!"

"There will always be people who hate you. We'll all do our jobs regardless. If I locked up everyone who hated me, there'd be no one left!"

"But... I wanted to crack the case! I feel –"

"Don't worry about it. Manfred will be back to normal. Eventually. No harm no foul."

"But... everyone will still try to kill you!"

"You think I don't know about that? Marcie and I have been building some systems. She even made some spells to help me detect poison in my food, and spot traps."

"What..."

"Star. We've got this," Marcie said. "We don't need to worry. Eclipsa's got us, she doesn't need to worry either."

Mina stood on a parapet of the Johansons’ fortress. Since her falling-out with Moon, she hadn't returned to Butterfly Castle. She hadn't taken her position as General of the Mewman Army back, though from what she'd glimpsed Anne would be thrilled to pass it back to her. But Mina did not want to serve Eclipsa. She refused to even entertain the thought.

"So what have you been doing now?" another voice asked her.

"Oh, you know, resisting. Doing little things to make my voice heard..."

"Constantly attempting to assassinate the queen?"

Ugh, snark. He didn't even do it right, it was too long to be snappy.

"I'm doing it strategically. Every time she even thinks about changing things as they are, bam! An assassination attempt. I'm smart, despite what the Forces of Evil might think."

"But they would at least know that these things lose their impact over time. One assassination attempt is a tragedy. Twenty is a punchline. And you're not the only one targeting her."

"...yeah, well what have you been doing?"

No response. 

"Yeah, that's what I thought. Desperately trying to fix what the Butterflys broke, and failing, all with the knowledge that they'll run to her the moment they find out. She's played a risky hand, but it will probably pay off."

"I have to accept this. I can still salvage things. She can't fix it alone, she'll need Star's magic, and after that I can fix things again. Maybe I'll even recruit you to clean up some of the mess."

"Or you could join me now," Mina put forth. "Who cares about the Multiverse? Making sure you win is the important thing, and if the game stops now, well, you're ahead."

"You'd be fine with the destruction of the Multiverse? Of you?"

"I don't want to give her the satisfaction of winning. I don't want to give them the satisfaction. I'm the last Solarian Warrior. It's fitting that everything will die with me."

"Hmm. I still think I can salvage this."

"She'll throw a curveball. I think she's already got one in mind."

"Well, I'll have to throw one of my own."

No response. They stood in silence after that.

Apparently Eclipsa has been getting a lot of attempted assassinations? And she didn't tell me? And she worked out a system with Marcie of all people, for detecting Mewman-made poisons??? How did I not know about this? I'm paying attention, right?

Chapter Text

They traveled for about a day. It was slowed, of course, by the sheer amount of people traveling. Every single monster in Mewni, walking single file through dark, small tunnels. They were divided into groups, holding hands like children on a field trip. Silvie led them from the front. She knew the tunnels better than anyone still alive. Shinjai and her family walked in the back, making sure no one fell behind.

There she found herself walking just behind Yvgeny, who was pushing his babies in an enormous stroller.

"...nice stroller," she finally said, by way of conversation.

"Thank you," Yvgeny said. "I bought it with the money I got from working fancy job at Mewni castle." He sighed. "I guess they replace me with Mewman now."

"If they last that long. Meteora is... terrifying."

"Yes, that is true."

A pause, and then Katrina spoke up. "So... where are we going?"

"Have I not told you, Katrina?" Shinjai asked. "We are going to the last sanctuary free of Mewman control, where Meteora could never reach. The heart of the Mountains of Incurable Anguish, guarded by the souls of millions of the unjustly killed. The home of the last child of the Old City –"

"Yeah, but where are we going?" Katrina asked.

Shinjai grinned. "Septarsis."

"Hopefully there will be enough room for everyone," Yvgeny said, looking anxiously ahead. Every monster in Mewni was quite a lot of people, even if the twists and turns of the tunnel hid the procession's true size.

Even then, though, every monster in Mewni didn't add up to anywhere near enough people. Centuries of Mewman occupation had decimated the population of the civilizations who had once occupied the entire continent. But they would get everything back, once... well. The Mewmans would have to repay what they had stolen, eventually. And then the true leaders of their world would be restored. Hopefully. I'd imagine the Forces of Evil can't wait to lead during peacetime, Shinjai settled on. And Silvie... well. 

They kept walking. 

Shinjai thought. The first time she had tried to take this escape route, she had been intercepted in the tunnels by that awful Solarian warrior, Mina Loveberry – Star's idol . She'd never seen Septarsis herself. She couldn't wait to see the Grand City. After all, there was no way even Mina could stop them now, even if she did escape her trap in the Mountains. Not with Silvie leading them. And not with the might of every monster in Mewni behind them.

Or, well, most monsters. Some of them didn't want to leave, even with Meteora bearing down on them. Shinjai could understand that, she supposed. Her mother had been very reluctant to leave her antique grate collection behind.

"Mom, the Mewmans aren't going to take these," Shinjai had said. 

"We don't know that!" Tiana had said. "They'll need metal here, right? They'll melt down all of my collection and make it into swords! We have to take it with us somehow!"

"You could pull rank," Kepler, her father, suggested in a half-joking manner. "Use your title to claim it as a historical site. Queen Moon would never so much as poke a historical site."

"We don't know if Queen Moon will still be queen by the time the army gets here! And most of these are made by the Forces of Evil themself, or one of their apprentices!" Not resisting a chance to brag, Tiana continued, "they're all ancient, made before the Forces of Evil moved on to more complex creations. When they were still learning their craft! They –"

"Mom, we've heard this speech a hundred times. We really don't have time for this," Shinjai said. "How about you talk with Silvie? I'm sure she had some kind of magic to help –"

"Li'oh'cha talí t'una'h?" Silvie said, sticking a head in their house, to confused faces. "Ah, te – sorry. Did you say my name?" Her face turned serious. "Please make it quick, more people will arrive soon. But I can help for now."

Shinjai frowned. That was Septarian. Silvie spoke it fluidly, without the illusory starts and stops of the latinized version. And Shinjai hadn't understood a lick of it.

"We need to –" Tiana started.

"Oh, your grates. Right," Silvie said. "Sorry for interrupting, but we really don't have time. Hold on." As soon as she said it, she was holding a silver cuff with two crossed lines on it. "Take this. Tap it twice and touch your grate to it. It will end up in a safe place."

Shinjai and Tiana gasped. "Is that –"

"Yep," Silvie said, and tossed the cuff to Tiana, who quickly fumbled and caught it. "In fact, use that for everyone's keepsakes and important stuff that can't fit in a backpack. Just the most important stuff, mind you – we don't want to run out of room in La'pa's warehouse."

Silvie was very nice about these things, Shinjai noted. She seemed to understand the importance of the grates to Tiana, even though others would scoff at the notion of collecting antique grates, most of which were too old to be of any use.

Might be because even Shinjai knew she was a notorious hoarder. Maybe.

(Shinjai put a small lump of bent gold in with the rest. Perhaps she would find a use for it later.)

But enough reminiscing, even if it was helping her avoid thinking about the... other things she could think about. Word was running down the line that they were close. Shinjai gave Yvgeny the job of watching for stragglers – the man was a born leader – and squeezed past other monsters to find her parents.

None of them had ever been to Septarsis. But here they were, and they were going to see it all. She found her parents, not too far from the end of the line. Tiana was holding the horn cuff carefully in her hands, focusing all her attention on it and not letting it out of her sight except to blink. Kepler was leading her by the elbow, standing a little in front of her, guiding her while her sight was occupied. 

"Mom, Dad!" Shinjai shouted, running up to them. "Did you hear? We're really going to see Septarsis!"

"Of course we heard," Tiana said, distractedly. "We were ahead of you. We got the news before you."

Shinjai settled into a position a little ahead of her father. She could maybe have squeezed beside him, but it would not be a comfortable fit. "Yeah..." she settled on. "I just... I've always wanted to see it."

Kepler laughed. "Don't think we're not excited too! We've always wanted to see it too. Now that the army's been recalled to Butterfly Castle, we don't need to worry about being intercepted. We can just... enjoy the anticipation!"

"I'm going to ask the Forces of Evil to make me a custom grate!" Tiana said. "If they're not busy, of course. If they are, I'll ask one of the people who work with them. They can't possibly do everything alone, can they?"

Shinjai slowly grinned. "I'm going to see the Forces of Evil! I'm going to meet them!" She jumped up and down and squeaked in delight.

"Careful there, squirrel-bat," Kepler said. "You might fracture some eardrums."

"Sorry, sorry," Shinjai said. She still grinned. "I can't wait to learn about everything... become a proper member of the Monster Rebellion... it's going to be amazing."

You heard it here folks. Some powerful, magical teenagers (Star) obsess over boy bands and rebelling against their parents. Because some people (Star) were allowed a childhood. Other people (Shinjai) obsess over their banned culture and rebelling against the government. Not that either is a bad thing, but... it's quite the contrast, that the princess of the realm, the one with the actual ability to affect people's lives, never even considered how things looked from her friend's perspective. And Shinjai was never envious of Star. Envious of her power, maybe, but not of her ability to just be a child. She never thought about that at all. Maybe she would later, but not now.

But... seeing Septarsis would be amazing. It would be strange and wonderful and everything she'd ever dreamed of.

But. But.

"When we go there... don't mention Star, okay?" Shinjai muttered to her parents. "We're not... the whole attempt was a failure. I don't think I can do anything more about that, and... it's all useless, anyways. I'd rather not be known as the 'Monster Who Kissed the Princess's Butt For Over a Year' by the Monster Rebellion."

"You were trying to do something good with it, though, weren't you?" Kepler asked.

"And you did genuinely like her," Tiana added.

"I... yeah... but it didn't do anything and I've burned that bridge now, so... it doesn't matter. Mom, Dad... she pulled her wand on me. I've never been so afraid."

"Oh, sweetheart," Tiana said, looking up from her hands. "We won't say anything. Nothing at all."

---

They came out of a tunnel in a river valley, surrounded by mountains. They walked on the riverbank, around a bend in the river, Shinjai running towards the front of the group, and... Shinjai gasped.

Septarsis's walls were a relatively new addition, placed there during Solaria's time when her warriors threatened to follow the river to its source. The Forces of Evil were reluctant to place them, something about "the Mountains are way too protected for that to be necessary," and "all it would be is a waste of magic that makes a few people feel better," but they eventually agreed to majority role, as long as the walls were pretty, like I – like Silvie suggested, and a better magical barrier was created over it. It would prove useful, too. Or, well, will prove useful, at this point.

They had no gates, Shinjai noted. And the walls were solid stone, but they appeared to be made out of endless vines twisted into a barrier. Like some stone vines had grown into a wall. Which is exactly what had happened.

Behind them was a thick green cloud. Soulflower poison, Shinjai recognized. Incredibly toxic to Mewmans, harmless to monsters. Helped the Anguished Ghosts protect the Mountains. Sometimes, when Star was being ignorant or frustrating and she couldn't think about anything else, Shinjai would stare up at the ceiling and imagine the vines covering all of Mewni, choking out the Mewmans. If she was feeling charitable, she imagined them using Hekapoo's dimensional scissors and crawling back to whatever hole they came from.

It was a terrible thought, Shinjai would recognize. None the least because the Mewmans would probably go and colonize someone else. But she didn't stop thinking it. It was a fall-back plan. Find out a way to just make them go away, if her lifetime of trying to work within their cursed monarchy failed.

It didn't matter. Shinjai was going to explore the heck out of Septarsis and no Mewman was going to stop her. First thing she had to do was find a door.

A hand, tapping her arm. She had been so busy studying the wall that she hadn't noticed Silvie walking up to her. "C'mon, Shinjai. There's someone I want to introduce you to."

Shinjai blinked. Silvie was bringing her forward, to the front of the group. She had Yvgeny and his babies on her other arm. "And Yvgeny... perhaps you didn't meet them on the right footing."

Shinjai gasped. There was someone on the wall. "Is that..."

The person jumped down, a good fifty feet, landing in a half-crouch. They straightened, and stared at the procession with vivid green eyes. They wore a heavy black coat, and, you know, were Toffee.

"Yep," Silvie said.

"Oh." Yvgeny said. He had never actually seen the Forces of Evil in the line of Forces of Evil work. "That explains very lot." He studied them, with a new eye, almost literally. Because they looked very different than their magic had made them look. Still recognizable, but they were missing several scales around their arms and a large burn scar covered the right half of their face, staining their key-shaped cheekmarks black in several places.

Shinjai made a strangled squeaking sound, trying to muffle it because she had to be presentable right now. The Forces of Evil – the Forces of Evil – looked at her, confused. "Are you... okay?" they asked, not bothering to use their fake Mewman accent.

Shinjai nodded, while Silvie snicked and couldn't she just die of embarrassment right now this was your fault, Silvie! "I'm fine. I'm totally fine!"

"She's a fan," Silvie said. "Kid's one dream in life is to join the Monster Rebellion. It's pretty cute."

Shinjai gathered herself. She thought back to her protocol lessons at Saint Olga's, and bowed. "I am eager to serve under you as your loyal, uh... underling."

The Forces of Evil snorted, exasperated. "You don't need any of that here. This is not a military outpost, and I am not your commander. You're refugees. Not my underlings."

"Oh," Shinjai said, all the wind knocked out of her. She straightened. Well. At least the Forces of Evil had spoken several sentences to her! They had talked! Should she ask for their autograph? Star would do that, probably. What was the protocol here?

While she was thinking about that, Yvgeny was staring down the Forces of Evil. Literally down, they were quite short. "Toffee."

"Yvgeny."

Yvgeny looked away. "...you know, if you told us who you were from the start, we would have followed you without question. Enough of us that we would take Castle Avarius easy."

"And have High Queen Moon come down on our heads the moment the words 'Forces of Evil' were said?" Toffee replied. "Whichever side he fell on, Ludo would've talked. He could never shut up."

"You could have told me."

"I didn't know that."

A pause.

"And besides, you'd never have met your babies if you weren't kicked out of Ludo's castle!" Silvie said, wrapping an arm casually around Toffee. (Shinjai was astounded.) "And a whole bunch of other things wouldn't have happened that the world is better for."

Yvgeny smiled, and shook his head. "I would never left Ludo's side. Thank you, for getting me away from that." He walked up to Toffee and wrapped them in a bear hug. Toffee, of course, froze, and waited for it to be over. Buff Frog let go, awkwardly dropping them, and Silvie laughed again.

"Now that we're done with introductions," Toffee said, dusting themself off though they had easily landed on their feet, "we ought to bring everyone inside. It will be difficult, but there will be room in Septarsis for everyone. If not, I'll find you room in other places in the Mountains of Incurable Anguish."

"Uh... how do we get in?" Shinjai asked, looking at the solid stone wall.

Toffee smiled. Their eyes glowed briefly, and the stone vines parted, revealing the Grand City. Inside, stone buildings piled up, clinging to cliffs and spreading across the ground. Soulflowers were everywhere, wrapping around buildings and spreading through the streets. And it wasn't just soulflowers: just about any plant that would grow in the light that filtered through the fog grew in abundance. Plants she'd never seen before and many she'd thought the Mewmans eradicated carpeted the ground, snaked up the walls, and grew tall and strong, branches arcing for the sky. Toffee warned them to watch where they went, though the soulflowers were controlled by the ghosts, who shouldn't hurt them. And ghosts were everywhere. Drifting through the streets, passing through walls, and hovering above the buildings. As the procession of monsters walked in, they turned to look at them, every single ghost turning their heads and staring unblinkingly. They didn't need to blink, so it was reasonable. 

Shinjai, though, couldn't stop herself from feeling creeped out. This was a city of the dead. She had known that. But perhaps now it could be a city of the living too.

The ghosts weren't the only people there, though. And Toffee was not the only one alive. There were other living monsters, Shinjai noticed lights on in some of the houses. In fact, even with the sky obscured by the green fog, there was light all around them. Most of it was coming through electrical or constructed magic fixtures in the floors and walkways, but she caught the odd bioluminescent plant or animal, too. Perhaps they were natural, or naturally magic. Or perhaps the claims of the Forces of Evil being talented in many fields were true.

Or maybe... she saw people, living people in the houses, walking in the streets. Maybe the Forces of Evil wasn't the only person working to improve this city.

Shinjai studied the buildings. Many of them seemed to be shaped out of stone, like massive bubbles made out of rock, covered with moss. But as they walked deeper into the city, swirls of red glass started to present themselves, standing out against gray stone and greenery. Some of them were painted over or carved into designs, but they were still everywhere. Shinjai looked at them, wondering what they were.

"The scar on this city won't fade for a long time," Toffee said, noticing her curiosity.

"Oh. This was..." Shinjai said.

Toffee nodded.

Shinjai touched the glass swirls. All these centuries later, and they were so bright. She could almost imagine that they were warm to the touch.

"You're not imagining it," Silvie said. "It took a long time for the inner parts of the cities to cool down enough to be habitable. But now we save a lot of energy on heating."

Toffee, unseen by Shinjai, rolled their eyes.

Shinjai idly wondered if Star would have used that spell on her, if she hadn't backed down. She sure hadn't had a problem using it on a defeated enemy whose back was turned.

She had to stop thinking about Star. 

They continued into the city, and Shinjai could already see the red streaks in the rock getting brighter and more frequent. But the soulflowers grew more common too. And then Toffee and Silvie stopped.

"What?" Shinjai asked, barely avoiding bumping into Silvie. It was difficult, Silvie dwarfed Shinjai, but she avoided even stepping on her tail. "Why have we stopped?" Looking around, there was nothing particularly interesting about this particular block. All there was were more piles of grown stone houses.

Toffee pointed towards a large stone building. "We're at the train station," they said. "I told the city housing directors to come here to find everyone places to live, but it seems they're not here. Unless they are , and they're just hiding ."

"Dang it," someone said, and two sizeshifers and a septarian popped into view. Two from behind rocks, one literally appearing from nowhere. Magic, Shinjai realized. More people here had magic than she realized.

Toffee nodded. "Thought so," they said, a hint of a smile on their face. A ghost popped up and said something to them in Septarian, and they nodded, and returned in Septarian. Shinjai tried to follow the conversation, but she couldn't figure out any of what was being said.

"Every refugee is in the city," Toffee said. "The wall is back in place. If you want to get out, you'll have to ask myself or the ghosts. Don't worry, unless there's a Solarian warrior at the gates, they'll let you out if you want."

Murmurs echoed through the monster refugees. The city was big, but there were a lot of them, if the tail end of the procession was only now coming into the city. The city streets were narrow, but... Shinjai wondered again if everyone would be able to fit here.

"There will be enough room, don't worry," Toffee said.

Shinjai startled. "Did you – You can read minds?"

"No. You looked back at everyone with a worried expression, and then at the city. I took an educated guess. If all these people can fit into the Forest of Certain Death, we can fit them here in the Mountains." They turned to the housing directors. "Ajei, Niyol, Ceca, can you get people to their new homes? Bring in more translators if possible. I'm sure we have some somewhere. I have to talk with this one here... Shinjai, right?" They were gesturing towards Shinjai. Shinjai didn't know whether to feel joyful or scared. The Forces of Evil wanted to talk to her? That was good, right?

Shinjai stood a ways away from the main crowd with Toffee and Silvie, as the crowd was shuttled into trains. Her parents, when they saw her, joined them, handing back Toffee's horn cuff. Then Toffee and Silvie gestured at them to come with. They boarded a train that was only large enough for the five of them, though Silvie took up quite a bit of the space. Then they were off to their destination.

The trains in Septarsis, Shinjai noted, were apparently powered by a combination of electricity and magic. She had never seen an Earth train, but she'd heard about the Great Raspberry Train Track Calamity from Star and Marcie. The trains here, in Septarsis, were very different. They were as large as one needed them to be, and they morphed in shape to accommodate people or change speeds. But they ran on a track like an ordinary human train, despite not having wheels.

They also would have offered quite the view, if not for the massive green haze over the city. At its highest point, Shinjai could see towers, spires, and the tops of tall trees poking out over the fog. It was a rather gorgeous effect, but the spires thinned out as they moved towards the center of the city. The center of the city...

The train lowered down, and back into the fog. It took a longer time than Shinjai expected to reach the station; the ground was far lower than it was when they'd boarded. She stepped out, legs unsteady after the smooth motion of the train, and looked around.

The center of Septarsis was, strangely, much less populated than the edges. By the living anyways – ghosts were even more everywhere.

And perhaps not so surprising. Red glass blanketed the ground. What had Silvie said? It took a long time for them to cool down? Probably centuries, given the time she was working with.

It was warm here, almost uncomfortably so, even to the mesothermic Septarians. Toffee took the lead, and they walked, almost as if in a dream, to the epicenter of the crater. They stopped, and Shinjai saw it.

A smaller crater, an indent in the ground slightly deeper than the surroundings. In the center, a tiny stone sapling, holding up a white crystal. Blindingly white, in the shape of a point-cut jewel, casting rainbow shadows on the dent in the ground around it. Bits of it had been cleaved off, but it still glowed blindingly white.

"Wow..." Shinjai gasped, moving closer to study it. "It's beautiful."

Silvie nodded, smiling. "It's our pride and joy."

Shinjai looked at Silvie's tail. Torn at the end. "Yeah..."

Shinjai looked away, and towards Toffee, who was sitting on the rim of the crater, looking at the sapling with an indescribable expression. They noticed Shinjai looking at them, and their expression shifted back into a businesslike seriousness. "I brought you here because Silvie trusts you, despite what she told me. And your behavior so far seems to be genuine. So I'm inclined to trust you."

Shinjai felt a pang of fear strike her. Silvie had told them something. Something they did not like. And she had a feeling she knew what it was. They would be so disappointed in her, trying to – calm down. Silvie knew, but didn't seem bothered. Her parents looked a little nervous, but Silvie was still smiling with no teeth, and she couldn't form a poker face if she tried. "...but?" she finally said.

"But. What is your relationship to Star Butterfly?"

Chapter Text

With a royal stamp and a signature, Eclipsa signed her first step towards Mewman-monster equality into law. Lacking political foresight, she implemented the biggest change first. From now on, monsters would not be confined to the Forest of Certain Death, and a committee of equal numbers of monsters and Mewmans would be set up to arrange reparations – the repaying of land, houses, and royal funds – to monsters forced into the Forest.

In short, it was like trying to create a universe by stuffing it full of matter – yes, you get something, but that something is a hypermassive black hole and if you didn't correct the energy values, literally no one can see. It's too much, too fast. Everyone's gonna die.

That's where the Maizleys, the Millers, and the Mims come in.

The Maizleys were a nuclear family of two heterosexual parents, and two children, a boy and a girl. They worked as accorntants in Butterfly Castle and considered themselves normal Mewman folk. The Millers were a strange sort, despite their normal-seeming name. Their mother was much taller than all of them, and wore black like she was constantly in mourning. Their parent owned a raven loft, and would play their violin in the middle of the night. Their child was smaller than even the youngest Maizley, and dug for bugs and herbs in the garden, but still managed to be the most polite person many have ever seen. They worked as potion-makers.

Both families were blessed with an enormous cabin in the countryside, devoid of the muck and squalor of the cities or the clear-cut destruction of much of what had once been forests. And by enormous, I really do mean enormous. They had to climb the stairs using ladders enormous. There was, in fact, a giant ladder system around the entire house, the only thing there suitable for Mewman heights.

The Maizley mother, Maude, called her family together. They were fresh from coming home from a gathering of family farther from Butterfly Castle. They had heard about Eclipsa becoming queen through the grapevine, but they didn't see what that had to do with them.

Except the monsters. That they noticed. Monsters were everywhere those days, and the Maizleys were not happy about that.

"Wasn't that a nice, off the -grid vacation!" Maude Maizley called. She gestured to the Millers, who had been strong-armed into coming with them, because "You share our building! You're practically family!" "Come here, Millers, come here!"

"Yes, of course," Miette Miller, the child, said. They helped Maude with the groceries she had insisted on buying, since there was always a chance that their fridge wasn't fully stocked, and that would be a disaster, wouldn't it?

Min Miller, the mother, took some of the grocery bags as well. 

"Thank you, you're a gem!" Maude said. "You're both little gems!" The little part was hardly true about Min, but they both accepted the compliment gracefully.

"Well, let's get climbing," Merrick, the Maizley father, said. He looked up the stairs, groaned, and started climbing. "You know, no matter how dang often I climb these stairs, I can't tell you how tall they are."

Magic overdoses will do that, yes.

"Yeah, well, maybe we're all getting older!" Maude said, directing most of her voice towards Mayhem Miller, the parent of the Millers, who never seemed to age no matter how long they had been around, staying in their early thirties.

"The market was such a mess today," Mendel, the Maizley daughter, said, climbing the ladder with her feet as she held as many grocery bags as possible. "It took us forever to get food. I can't wait to just relax in my bed."

"Yes, those monsters," Maude said, rolling her eyes. "Even the little ones act like they're gonna starve if they don't stuff their carts as full as possible. And the big ones... we're just not ready to handle the big ones."

"Yeah, couldn't the big ones just take their time coming out of... wherever they come from?" Merrick said. "Or they could forage for big monster food! I'd imagine it's not that hard."

"On the contrary, I liked the monsters," Miette said. "I gained some slime and a septarian scale from that kind old slime. I will make many healing potions from this."

"I believe our housemates are complaining, Miette," Min said, shouldering groceries and her own weight with only her legs while somehow maintaining perfect Chinese opera makeup. I've tried that exact thing before, and I really don't know how she does it. "We ought to let them complain."

"They're complaining about things that aren't an issue," Miette responded, as the group reached the door. "The monsters have as much of a right to be here as we do. Perhaps even more. Don't you know your history?"

"Yes, but that was a long time ago. Not now," Maude said. "Manny, kiddo, do you have the key?"

Manny, the Miazley son, nodded and brought out a truly enormous key.

"Alright, who wants to climb up and open the door?" Maude asked.

No response.

"Come on, someone has to do it!"

Min and Mayhem looked at each other. "I'll do it," Mayhem said. They shouldered the key and clambered up the ladder. The key, large and cumbersome and made of mostly metal as it was, was very difficult to climb with. That fact made this particular chore the least sought-after in the Maizley-Miller household. And the kids had been good today, so Mayhem was willing to give.

He was only halfway up the ladder, however, when the doors swung open. And that is where the Mims come in.

The Mims were a family of enormous, herbivorous septarian relatives known as the Tecoixin, and they were big enough that they could easily use the house that the Maizleys and the Millers lived in. They were a perfect little nuclear family, with two heterosexual parents and three young children. The father liked doing taxes and grocery shopping. The mother liked eating dinner and sewing. The children liked playing tag in the backyard and making a mess. Were circumstances different, they and the Maizley parents would get into screaming matches with the referee together when their children lost at cornball.

But things weren't different. Micau, the father, opened the door, and stared down at the Mewmans. "Uh... we're not interested."

"What?" Mayhem yelped, falling from the ladder. Min caught him.

"Why are you in our house?" Manny Maizley demanded.

"Well, it's not your house," Micau said. "The Reparations Council established by Queen Eclipsa gave this house back to me and my family when you didn't show up to the hearing. It belonged to my great-grandmother-in-law, before Solaria forced us to move to the Forest of Certain Death."

"How would we know to go to a hearing?" Merrick wondered.

"I'd imagine we'd get it in the mail," Min said. "And we were on an 'off the grid' vacation, weren't we, Maude?"

Maude nodded shakily. "I don't think that was a good idea after all," she said, stating the obvious.

Mayhem blanched. "Wait! What about my ravens?"

"I dunno. They're birds, they'll follow you home, right?" Micau asked.

"That's not how ravens work!"

"I'm sure it'll be fine," Micau said. "But we definitely don't want strangers in our house, sorry. We packed up your stuff for you, though. It should be enough to get your birds to follow your scent, right?" He proffered several enormous packages and dumped them at the two shocked families' feet.

He then closed the door.

"My ravens..." Mayhem sighed. A single tear traced down their cheek.

On the other side of the door, Micau turned to his wife and children in the living room. "You think I was too harsh on them?"

"What do you mean?" the Mim mother, Mitsi, asked.

"Well, it feels a bit harsh, just kicking them out of what they thought was their home," Micau said. "I just handed them their stuff and everything. And apparently they were having something called an 'off-the-grid vacation' and that's why they didn't show."

"Oh, I've heard of vacations!" the oldest Mim child (the other two were little kids) crowed. "It's when you live somewhere but decide to go somewhere else! We could take vacations too!"

"Take vacations? We still have to guard this house!" Mitsi said. "We need to make sure it stays ours!"

"Yes, but once we've guarded it for a good long while, we can... put up fake versions of ourselves and light all the fires with tons and tons of wood, and then we'll leave and come back after a short time at... I dunno, maybe we could go to the beach. It's nice there, I've heard."

"We already have a nice place," Micau said. "It's this place. Have you decided on your rooms yet?"

"I want that room!" the youngest child, Millie, said, pointing towards the living room.

"There isn't a bed in that room, la'nya'pa (little silly one)," Mitsi said gravely. 

"There wasn't a bed in my old bedroom either," Millie said gravely.

"Well we can have beds now! They're very comfortable. We don't even need the fabric for clothes and things. We can just have blankets."

"What will happen to the birds?" asked the oldest child, Mauyé, who had explored every inch of the house already. "The ones in the attic."

"Oh, those. They'll go find their owner, I think," Micau said. "At least I think they will. We might have to chase them out."

"I don't want to chase them out," Mauyé said. "Just think of how useful they could be. A community of those birds could guard our house for us. Or gather useful stuff. They're monsters in their own right, and can even talk without the aid of magic. We should keep them there. We're not using the attic anyways."

"I like birds!" Millie said, her enthusiasm belting out the words. She didn't know about inside voices yet, and she didn't care to learn.

Her brother, Malíti, pushed a fancy new plate around before saying "Birds are cool," in SSL.

"I suppose. We'll see what they want to do. We don't need all this space," Mitsi acquiesced. "Now, what rooms do you want? You can have your own; this place is huge! But they have to have beds. I don't want to move any beds tonight."

Millie screeched in joy, and ran for the nearest door. She hadn't seen any other rooms except the living room and kitchen, and was eager to explore. Mauyé followed at a more sedate pace. Malíti just sat and stared at his empty plate.

"Hey, what's up buddy?" Mitsi signed to her son, as Mauyé helped Millie climb the stairs, Micau following to make sure they didn't hurt themselves. Helicopter dad.

They hadn't touched the ladders installed everywhere. None of them were sure why. A reminder, maybe, that this was temporary.

Malíti stared at Mitsi, expression serious. "I'm hungry."

"Of course!" Mitsi said. She walked to the fancy icebox that kept her food cool and she was totally going to send a superior letter to her mother-in-law about, and brought out a bundle of giant lettuce. She peeled it into small chunks for her kid.

Malíti nodded. He made a small grunt. "Hey, Mother?" he signed once she turned to him.

"Yes?"

"Now that we have different rooms... will we still love each other?"

"Oh, sweetie, of course!" Mitsi said. "I'll always love you. And you can come sleep in my room whenever you like. Same, I'm sure, with Mauyé."

Malíti nodded, and then sat politely waiting for food, which Mitsi promptly placed in front of him.

"I know this place is strange, but we'll always have each other. Always know that."

---

"My birds!" was what Mayhem could only say, only think about. "What will happen to them? The other Mewmans would hurt them on sight, thinking they're a bad omen! The attic was big enough to give them all shelter, but now..."

"Hey, maybe this isn't so bad," Maude said. "Maybe they were the ones who gave us bad luck. Maybe now... maybe now we can start fresh!"

"I always knew those birds would bring trouble," Merrick said. 

"Raven's aren't bad luck, sir," Miette said. "In fact, I can use their feathers to make good luck potions."

"Well, that's hardly the only problem around now!" Manny shouted. "Where are we going to sleep?"

"My birds!" Mayhem wept.

Mendel, rummaging through the two family's luggage, groaned. "Ugh! They bent my limited edition cornball cards!"

"We have to find shelter!"

"What will happen to the ravens?!"

Maude groaned. "Ugh! Everyone, quiet!"

Everyone quieted.

"I know what we should do," Maude said. "Mendel, now is not the time. Manny, it doesn't matter. Mayhem, you're the best survival person here. Where should we go?"

"It's pointless without my birds," Mayhem sighed.

"Hmm..." Min said. She opened her grocery bag. "I think... We have enough food to camp out for a few days. And I always bring a few essentials with me when I travel. So in the meantime..." She grinned. "Let's get my partner's birds."

"What?" Maude asked. "You can't mean..."

"Yes. I propose the grandest of pursuits: a heist!"

Later, late evening to be exact, Malíti couldn't sleep. He had chosen a room between his parents and Mauyé, so he had his pick of rooms to sleep in. Unless he wanted to sleep in Millie's room – as she still slept in a crib, that was out of the question. So he went to Mauyé's room.

They weren't there. Not in a metaphysical sense, in that they were dreaming, but a literal absence. This could be bad. His mom and dad would be really mad if she wasn't sleeping. It was way past everyone's bedtime. And they would be mad that he wasn't sleeping, too! He'd better find Mauyé fast.

He looked around, and then saw it: the door to the attic was ajar.

The heist was quite simple, really. Everyone took their different positions. They still had the key to the house, and the Mims hadn't removed the ladders. Yet. They acted swiftly. Manny, the Maizley son, was the lookout, he would bang Min's gong as loud as possible if any of the lights came on. Tecoixin, unlike their septarian relatives, were diurnal, so the house was asleep. And Manny had plenty of experience in being loud.

He was six. Of course he did.

Min would use the key to unlock the door. That was where they ran into their first hurdle: the key no longer worked.

But no matter. Min put some of her knives to good use and climbed the giant wooden door to a human-sized crack the Maizleys wanted to fix if they ever found a carpenter who also doubled as a climber. She wiggled through, and unlocked the door from the inside.

There they met another problem: one of the monsters, Mitsi, was awake and patrolling the house. Thankfully, the house was large enough to hide the group, but they would also have to invoke their contingency plan. A distraction.

Maude and Merrick, the two Maizley parents, as well as the children Miette and Mendel, ran to a better position and then started banging pots and pans together. Mitsi whirled around at the noise, and Min and Mayhem made their exit, deeper into the house.

(When Mitsi found the group, Miette in their politeness would apologize, and then insist that they were protecting them from the "Hookman." When asked what that was, the group would spin a fascinating tale. They could really tell a story. I like them.)

Min and Mayhem raced up the ladders to the second floor, which was as difficult as racing up ladders actually is. They then ran to the door to the attic. It was ajar. They climbed up the ladders to the stairs. By this time, Min was panting hard.

"Hey, my sweet, are you alright?" Mayhem asked.

Min nodded. "Yes... I'm fine. Go ahead of me... I'll follow as soon as... I can." She got out her inhaler and puffed a breath.

"I'll go explain everything to the ravens."

"I'll see you... there, and we'll... enact the final steps of our plan. Go... ahead."

Mayhem nodded, and ran to the next ladder, soon disappearing into the darkness.

In hindsight, Min thought, perhaps we shouldn't have established our raven loft in this place. I did like the space, though.

The space had been nice.

"The Hookman?" Mitsi asked. "What or who is the Hookman?"

"He's... uh... excuse me." Mendel cleared her throat, and put on her spookiest voice. "On full moons, he stalks this land, looking for unsuspecting victims to hook!"

Mitsi frowned. "It's not a full moon. It's a waning gibbous."

"Of course. But we're doing this now because..."

"Preemptive measures!" Maude said. "I mean, we have to be on guard once the moon starts getting full."

"It's waning. Getting less full."

"Well, we have to do it after the full moon too," Merrick said solemnly. "Or else he'll come back even stronger."

"Yeah, we were being polite!" Mendel added. "You've got our house now, so we figured we'd finish the ritual for you. A house-warming present."

"...My great-grandmother never mentioned a Hookman when she told stories of this place."

"He's a relatively recent addition," Miette said, finally getting over their awe at the Maizley's BSing skills. "He met a gruesome hook-related death one hundred and thirty-seven years ago."

"Huh. Well, I instinctively trust you, so... I guess you can complete your ritual."

Miette nodded gravely. "Next we'll have to go to the attic and make a lot of noise. A lot, cross my heart. You won't want to come with us. In fact, the ritual should definitely be performed with us Mewmans completely and utterly alone."

That was a little too many lies for Mitsi to swallow. The Mewmans were excellent liars, but she wasn't that dumb, and her three children had honed her BS detectors to a fine edge.

"Nope, I'm coming with you. In fact, I'll get you a ride." She put a hand down on the floor. The Mewmans glanced at each other and reluctantly got on her hand.

She was, thankfully, very careful with them, for she certainly had experience in carrying home the weird little creatures her children brought her. She walked up the stairs to the second floor, and then up to the attic. Min was nowhere to be seen. 

She reached the top, and opened the door.

Mauyé was in the attic. Malíti breathed a sigh of relief, panting slightly from taking the stairs at full speed. They would totally be in huge trouble if Mitsi caught them. "Mauyé! Mauyé, what are you doing here? We're all supposed to be sleeping! Mom will be so worried, we're supposed to sleep at night!"

Malíti trailed off his frantic signing as Mauyé pointed downwards, at their arms. "Do not worry, dear boy. If your sibling needs to sleep, I shall not bother her for much longer. And I will vouch for her, as she is only awake because of me."

Malíti looked up at his sibling. In their arms was a small Mewman, signing in perfect Septarian Sign Language. Or perhaps he was a monster that really looked like a Mewman, Malíti was no expert on Mewmans. Or maybe they weren't a Mewman, weren't they supposed to be bigger? If they were that small, how had they defeated the Forces of Evil and their armies?

So he just signed "What?"

"This is Mayhem," Mauyé said, making sure to move her lips clearly, as she couldn't sign. "They take care of these ravens. And I would've gone to bed if they hadn't shown up! Uh, they're nice to talk to. I don't need all that much sleep anyways."

Mayhem shook their head. "Dear, I only seek to get my birds back, and I'll be out of your scales. Myself and my companions will take our exit on the ravens, right?"

A smaller raven that was nonetheless around the same size as Mayhem, nodded. "We will fly with you and find a new home," she said, "though it pains us to leave this one."

A gasping breath, and Min finished her climb up the stairs. "Oh no! Mayhem!" she shouted to her spouse, staring at their position in the giant hand of Mauyé.

"All is well, sweetheart," Mayhem said. "I was just having a lovely chat with Mauyé here. They are fascinated by the birds, as they should be."

"I'm here too," Malíti signed. Mauyé translated.

Min looked at them. She slowly smiled, and nodded. "Oh... okay. Yes, I can see it. Uh... how are we getting the ravens out of the loft?"

Steps on the stairs, of something much heavier than even Mauyé or Malíti. Min and Mayhem looked at each other, and Min turned to the ravens, but it was too late, and the attic door was pushed fully open as an enormous Tecoixin stepped into the room.

In her hand were most of the Maizley family and Miette. She opened her giant mouth and: "...Mauyé, Malíti, what are you doing up so late?"

"It's my fault!" Malíti signed, instinctively.

"How is it your fault?" Mauyé said. "I was here first!"

"Nuh uh!"

"I was!"

"Stop! Stop! It's all my fault!"

"Why would you think it was all your fault?" Mitsi asked. "If there's one thing you are, it's weirdly non-rebellious. I don't think you've ever disobeyed me."

Malíti shuffled his feet. "If I'm up, you're okay with that, but you're always telling Mauyé to go to sleep on time. So it's my fault because you won't be mad about it."

"Oh, sweetheart, that's because you're still a little kid! You're expected to not know how to sleep yet! But I would never make Mauyé feel bad because they couldn't sleep. I'm just a little disappointed because they need sleep but don't seem to want to sleep. Do you get it?"

Malíti shuffled his feet again. "Yeah, I guess."

Mauyé nodded, and tapped his shoulder so he was facing them. "It's okay, bro. He was just trying to find me. But I wanted to speak to the birds... they're supposed to be able to predict the future!"

"Your princess needs to get her [REDACTED] together or the world's gonna end!" a raven shouted.

"Exactly!" Mauyé said. "Though I'm not sure what that means."

Mitsi opened her mouth to say something, but Min got there first. "Nightcrier! We do not say those words around children!"

"Sorry," the raven muttered. "It's true though."

Mitsi smiled. "I'm sure your ravens will have excellent company wherever you go."

"Actually..." Mauyé said, fidgeting with their open hand. "Can they stay here?"

"What?" Mitsi asked.

"The ravens, and these people. They've lived in this house for ages. And we're not using the attic... their ladders and things are all over this house... I think we could really get along! This house is way too big for even us, anyways. And I think the ravens like me!"

Mitsi should have said no. She couldn't trust these people. They were Mewmans, after all. But... she saw how happy Mauyé was with these birds and these strange Mewmans. She found herself saying "They can stay here for one night. I'll talk to your father about everything after that."

Mauyé smiled. She knew that meant probably yes.

Maude Maizley ruined it. "Hey, we're not gonna share our house with these monsters! It's our house, we shouldn't have to share it!"

"Yeah, I'm with Maude," her husband, Merrick, said. "No offense, but... this house isn't big enough for everyone here. Don't you monsters need large habitats or something? You should probably leave this house to us and go back to your natural ecosystem."

Mitsi looked unamused. "Better than a shack in the Forest of Certain Death. This is our natural ecosystem. Go find your own."

"Merrick Maizley! Maude Maizley!" Miette scolded. "You ought to be ashamed, saying such ignorant things. The attic is large enough for all of us. We can live here together."

"You can, maybe. But this just isn't the right life for us," Maude said, looking at Mendel. "This is no life for a child of mine."

Miette frowned. "But –"

"I'm sorry, Miette. You're a sweet kid. But this isn't right for us. We're old, and set in our ways. We'll go find somewhere else to live. Now come, Mendel. Don't look back."

Mitsi set them down, thinking but not saying Good riddance.

They walked away, and down the steps. They were soon out of sight. Maude, Merrick, and Mendel soon met up with Manny, and they sorted out and packed up their stuff and left into the unknown.

Manny and Mendel looked back.

They looked back for a long time.

Chapter Text

Star and Eclipsa stood together. Eclipsa was holding her bone guitar and Star was very, very worried, for very, very stupid reasons. "You're sure you can do this?"

"Please, Star. I know how to perform in front of people."

"I know, but your audience was mostly monsters, right? We're trying to appeal to Mewmans. What if –"

"Eclipsa, you're on!" Lilacia shouted, ducking behind the stage. "I was going to have the show be twenty hours of me cracking hilarious jokes and singing, but I heard Star wanted to make Eclipsa popular, and I'm, like, the champion of that!"

"And it will help repair our relationship with the Pegasi," Eclipsa noted. Star scratched her neck nervously, not meeting anyone's eye. "Having the new queen of Mewni appear on the princess's show will be a step in the right direction."

"So... what're we doing?" Lilacia asked. "An interview? I can totally grill you on your life choices and stuff. Like running away from your kingdom to be with a monster. Tell me, was he hot?"

Eclipsa smiled. "Oh of –"

"We're not doing that. Eclipsa's singing a song. A nice, non-controversial song," Star said.

"Ooh, a rock star," Lilacia said. "I can work with that." She walked onto the stage and addressed the crowd. "Alright, everyone! Give it up for the Queen of Darkness, the Monster-Lover, and the Totally-Not-A-Baby-Eater, Eclipsa!"

Star groaned. Eclipsa hid a wince with an awkward smile, and stepped up to the stage. "Hello... I'm Eclipsa. The queen. I wrote a song for you all." She strummed her guitar and sang:

"Imagine waking up
To a world turned upside down.
Those you know are gone,”
And suddenly you have the crown."

Star sighed in relief. It was a light and airy song, like a lullaby, not the weird surrealist genre-defying chants typical of monsters. Something Mewmans would like. Thank the stars.

As for me, I like surrealist genre-defying chants. Sue me.

"Here I am, this is me,
Brokenhearted but finally free.
Never quite fit the mold,
Just not great at doing what I'm told.
Now I'm here, in your world,
So much bigger from my point of view.
Centuries from my home,
Can't go back, so let's start something new.
Here I am, this is me.
Open hearted I proudly decree,
Now as queen, I am yours.
Let's make magic and reach for the stars.
Let's make magic and reach for the stars."

Star smiled, and clapped.

A tomato rocketed through the air and hit the window.

Star's smile turned into a confused frown. She ran to the window, to see Mewmans and alicorns standing at the gates of the palace, angry. "Stop showing us the Queen of Darkness and give us the twenty hours of Princess Lilacia cracking hilarious jokes and singing like you promised!" one of the members of the large mob shouted.

"They wanted twenty hours of Lilacia cracking terrible jokes and singing in her weird fake accent?" Star asked, bewildered.

"Well it was how we advertised the show," Seahorse said, popping up beside Star. Star yelped and leapt backwards. Then she looked at the poster Seahorse was holding up.

" The Pegasus Show: Twenty hours of Princess Lilacia cracking hilarious jokes and singing! "

Star sighed. "Well, this is a bust. No one with good taste would watch this show. Come on, Eclipsa, let's go."

Lilacia watched them go. She wasn't the brightest star in the sky, but even she could tell that Star had just insulted her, and her show. She was sad, but not angry. Not angry.

Not yet .

"So, any ideas to make Eclipsa popular?" Star asked the assembled people: Janna, Jackie, Marcie, and Meteora.

"I don't think you should make her popular," Janna said. "I think you should hold a fair, and have her be the guy in the dunk tank. You'd make enough money to never have to worry about popularity again."

"Thank you, Janna. Any other ideas?"

"Maybe the fair is a good idea," Jackie said. "Or... it doesn't have to be a fair. Just a party or a fun event where Eclipsa can associate herself with positive things."

"That's a great idea!" Marcie said. "We need to make her relatable to the people. We need to have something where she can show off her hobbies other than ruling."

"Right, right. She can sing, or something!"

"She also likes crafting," Marcie said. "Especially with bones and stuff. Anyone know any butchers that have spare bones to use?"

"Yeah, no, we're not using bones to craft anything. That would tank Eclipsa's reputation faster than I could say Cítowhatever."

"What?"

"Císalowhatever."

"Well, that would definitely tank her reputation slowly if you can't even say it," Marcie pointed out.

"Stop being a smart aleck and help me generate actually helpful ideas," Star replied.

"Hey, uh, don't you think you're taking this a little too far?" Janna asked. "Asking Eclipsa to pare down all the unsavory parts of her just so she can be popular is... kinda not great."

"No! I have to make her perfect! She deserves the throne, she has to be better at this than my mother! She's just out of practice. I have to remind her! I have to make sure everything is working out. She just has to let go of her weird witchy stuff and she'll be the perfect queen!"

"Star." Janna, the weird witch, said. "You've lived the stress of having to rule perfectly before. Do you really want to offload that onto someone who not only doesn't want that but also probably will never change no matter how much you micromanage her? And... you gave Eclipsa the wand so she could rule. Not be a figurehead with you really pulling the strings."

"How do you know anything about Eclipsa? You've never met her."

Janna shrugged. "I'd like to, though."

Marcie shuddered. "Remind me to stay a hundred miles away from you two when that does happen."

"Hundred miles might not be enough," Janna replied, grinning. "By the way, have you –"

Star groaned. "Can we stay on topic? We need to make Eclipsa popular! Meteora, you haven't talked much. What should we do?"

"Oh," Meteora said. "Uh... I don't know. I only know what the upper-class prim little – ahem. I only know what the nobles will want. I don't know what to do about the peasants."

"Well, the peasants would want what the nobles want, right?" Star said, tapping her fingers together. "Has Eclipsa chosen a page from the book of fashion? Or thrown glamorous parties? Or –"

"Star... I don't think –" Janna started, but Star was on a roll.

"Meteora, you have to remind me what rich people like! I could never stay awake in protocol classes!" Star grabbed Meteora's hand and shook it excitedly. Not for the first time, she missed having a wand to chew on. Maybe she should get a fake wand.

Meteora looked confused. "You're sure this will work to help my mother?"

"Yes! Yes, yes, yes!"

"Star, I happen to be a peasant, and –" Janna cut herself off. Star was not listening. "This plotline is not going to end well for her, is it."

Marcie sighed, and shared a knowing glance with Janna. "Let's not wait. We need to nip this in the bud. Right, Jackie? Jackie?"

Jackie was not there.

Star and Meteora stood together in a newly renovated room. "Alright Meets. You're gonna teach me all the boring stuff you learned from Saint Olga, and I'm gonna learn it. For Eclipsa!"

"For Mom, but... please don't call me Meets."

"Sure, sure, Meets. Let's get to the learning."

"Well, now that I can't see, it's difficult to... I've never really touched the various dresses and stuff that are fashionable. Because they weren't to be touched, that would ruin them."

"We can worry about fashion later. We have to focus on protocol. How does a proper queen act?"

"I can't be sure that I'll get the poses right," Meteora replied. "I... I can't be sure if you'll get the poses right, either. I can't see you. Don't you have a protocol book here somewhere?"

Star shook her head. "Whenever I get the chance, I burn them. Burned them all recently, and Eclipsa never replaced them."

"And you can't check the library, because...?"

"Oh, the library's burned too."

"Oh."

Star groaned. "I don't know what to do! I need to make Eclipsa popular, but I don't know how!"

"About Eclipsa... could you tell me about her?"

Star blinked, and looked at Meteora, surprise on her face. Meteora couldn't see that. "What?"

"Could you tell me about my mother? I don't know her very well, and... it's a little awkward to ask your mother what she's like, you know."

Star blinked. "Uh, well, I've only really known her for a year..."

"What has she been like in that year?"

Star shrugged. "Uh... well, she's... she's really good at, like, studying magic."

"Go on."

"Well, she never learned to use magic without the wand, but I think that was because she had to run away before that happened. Might be why Glossaryck made me learn to dip down so early. Or maybe I'm just weird. I've heard that I'm as strong as Eclipsa was at my age, so I really think –"

"Star. I'm sorry, but please stay on topic."

"What?"

"You were telling me about my mother?"

"Right! Right. Eclipsa... She doesn't play by anyone's rules. She does what she wants, when she wants. And she doesn't care what other people think of her. Which would be okay, but she's a queen. She has to do right by her people."

"Okay, could you tell me something that doesn't involve your opinions of her? Like, what does she like to do?"

"She's a musician. She hasn't had much time to focus on that because –"

"Queen. Yes, I get it." Meteora got up and left.

"Wait! We still need to go over protocol and stuff!" Star shouted.

Meteora was gone.

Star stared back at her notes. Really looked at them. ECLIPSA MUST LEARN TO ACT LIKE A PROPER QUEEN, they read.

Star froze as her brain made the connection. "Shoot, am I the bad guy here?"

Star walked around for a bit, looking for Marcie, Jackie, and Janna, but they were nowhere to be found. So she went to the last person that would be helpful, because if her dawning realization had any truth to it, she would just help Star ignore it. But she needed someone to talk to, so she went to the hospital wing.

"Mom?" she asked, fiddling with her hair.

Moon was sitting on the edge of her bed, and stood up to greet her daughter. "Star! River brought me the most fascinating book about cooking rocks. I haven't been able to catch up on reading in forever. Can you tell Eclipsa to enact some literacy programs? I want the entire kingdom to know this joy!"

Star sighed. "I don't know... this isn't what I came here to ask about. Or, well, it kind of is. I was wondering, when you were queen, did you... everyone in Mewni loved you. Still loves you. How did you make them like you so much?"

Moon laughed, and sat back down on her bed, legs twinging. "Oh, it was a long process. They hated me at first."

Star gasped. "What? Why?"

"Plenty of reasons. I had proved myself worthy on the battlefield by defeating the Forces of Evil, but it was nowhere near a total victory, so a lot of the Mewmans had their doubts. And it was an open secret that I had used dark magic to do it. And I was very young! You're now older than I was, and there was a war to consider. Plus, to confess, my mother was a very divisive figure among Mewmans. She worked very hard, but she made a lot of powerful people uncomfortable. Mewmans don't like change, and when everyone else has been brought up to their level, it can feel like change even if they were staying where they are. So that left me with two options: I could act like my mother and anger the nobles while gaining the support of the peasants and monsters, or I could risk it all and be her opposite, and her supporters would hate me. But that didn't guarantee the support of the nobles, as they were convinced my bloodline was tainted, and they're very obsessed with bloodlines. But... the problem was I didn't want to take the safe option. I didn't want to be my mother."

"So you... people didn't like you a lot. What did you do to change that?"

Moon shrugged. "I did my best to act as a proper warrior queen. I destroyed the monster army and pushed the Forces of Evil back into their infernal mountains. Then I worked on propaganda and administration, deifying my mother as an unfairly murdered mother of a warrior queen, painting her as a martyred saint and myself as a hero out for justified revenge, no matter my mother's actual politics. And I hammered out laws that favored the Mewmans regardless of class, and made them feel ever so slightly superior to... others. But the biggest thing was time. Eventually everyone got used to me."

"Star?" Eclipsa's voice asked. Star whirled around and saw Eclipsa. Behind her were Janna, Marcie, Meteora, and Jackie, all in various states of totally-not-suspicious smiling.

Star breathed a sigh of relief. "Oh, you guys are okay. I thought you'd been eaten by Hungry Larry or something."

"Ugh, why'd you have to bring up Hungry Larry?" Marcie asked. Janna shuddered and muttered something about that being an experience she did not want to repeat.

"Hungry Larry has no power here," Eclipsa said. "The thing we should be concentrating on is why you think I should force myself into a little box to appease the Mewmans. This is a monarchy, not a democracy. I don't have to prove myself to anyone."

Star frowned. "But if the people hate you, no one will listen to you! No one will help you."

"They'll get used to me. I have the wand and the crown, and I can make sure they help me, however grudgingly. I don't care if they like me. I was not... I have never wanted to be loved by everyone."

Star frowned. "But if the only people who support you are the monsters, how will you rebuild the army? How will you repair all of the damage to the kingdom?"

"I'll hire monsters," Eclipsa said, shaking her head. "I have never changed myself to fit with what's popular, and I'm not going to start now. But... with your help, perhaps I can gain the support of both monsters and Mewmans, without sacrificing myself."

Star smiled. "Yeah... that would be great."

Eclipsa smiled back.

A loud scream... of delight. A small child had entered the infirmary, and raced towards Eclipsa. "Queen Eclipsa! Queen Eclipsa!"

Their parents rushed after them, but the kid made up for their stubby legs by being very nimble. They careened into Eclipsa quite literally, nearly knocking the tiny woman over. They both stabilized themselves, and the child, suddenly nervous, stared at the ground. "Uh... I really liked your song."

"Oh, you did?" Eclipsa said, straightening her hat.

"Yeah. It was really nice."

The parents caught up to them. "So deeply sorry, your majesty. We assure you, we take full responsibility for disturbing you, we swear our –"

Eclipsa shook her head, smiling. "No, it's no trouble, I assure you. It's good to meet a fan."

The family soon went on their way, but Eclipsa's smile didn't waver. "I think we're already on the right track."

I have to learn how to be less pushy. Eclipsa's way more competent than I give her credit for, sometimes. She's a good queen. I focus too much on the Mewmans – any progress towards monster equality will be seen as a step backwards for them, even if they haven't moved at all. Because suddenly they aren't at the top anymore. Ugh, directions.

Chapter Text

Meteora stood in the back of the throne room, behind Eclipsa's throne. Star had convinced her mother to let her in on some royal proceedings. Yes, she was still recovering, and yes, it would be nice to be a teenager for once, but Meteora was still going to inherit the kingdom. She deserved to know some things about running a kingdom, some responsibility, not the protocol and scraps that Saint Olga had taught her.

Meteora didn't know if she agreed with Star, but she supposed it made sense. But, then again, she didn't like that the choice had been made without her input. She didn't know how to feel, and she wondered if Star was just looking for a replacement as top Royal Advisor. Take another teenager's childhood and restore her own.

She deserved it, Meteora supposed. She had been working so hard to help her mother and just as hard when she was actually a princess. And what had Meteora done? Destroyed the entire kingdom, for one. Took the souls of everyone in it. Forces of Evil, she'd been so angry. She had wanted to just... ugh. It didn't matter. She had given everything back, right? And it was her birthright, she was the princess of Mewni, she didn't have to apologize. No, no, that was a bad thought. A Saint Olga thought, where the most high-ranking by blood made no apologies, and those under them bowed and scraped for forgiveness. Stars above, Saint Olga followed her everywhere, didn't she? She –

"Meteora?"

A jolt of fear surged through her. She stood rigidly at attention, no slouching, that wasn't proper. "Yes, Your Majesty?"

Eclipsa frowned, confused. "'Mother' is fine. I was asking you if you'd like to take a seat." She guided Meteora's hand to a seat to the right of her throne, only a little smaller.

"You got a – a throne? For me?"

"Yes, the carpenter just dropped it off. Were you not listening?" Eclipsa asked.

"I – no, no, I was paying attention, I just –"

"It's fine. I also could never pay attention to these boring meetings. You were faking it remarkably well. How did you stop from falling asleep?"

How indeed , Meteora thought. She took her seat. "Uh... what's next?"

"Next we have a meeting with some potential new advisors. They're all monsters, but... I don't know..."

"What?" Meteora asked eventually.

"According to Star, I need to improve my image with the Mewmans, and I think if I have to, you should have to too. You are going to inherit the throne, after all."

If she had them, Meteora's eyes would have widened. Her forehead furrowed. "What? Everyone hates me. We know that. I don't – I don't know how to make them not hate me. They have every reason to."

"Don't worry, we'll start small. The rulers of the lower kingdoms are coming to discuss my upcoming coronation, and you can meet their children. They'll be very excited to meet you."

"I bet," Meteora said, wrapping her tail around her legs. Saint Olga would hate her showing off her tail like this. Sorry, Saint Olga, but I'm gonna need this. Meeting the kids of the lands I was ravaging? Or, well, planning to ravage, mostly. I trampled through a bit of the Spiderbite forest, but... I mostly only attacked monster lands. The Forest of Certain Death was on my way to Butterfly Castle... was that really that much of a coincidence? Does it being a coincidence make it okay?

"Meteora! Mewni to Meteora. Sweetheart?"

Meteora startled back into reality. Then she groaned. "See, mother? I'm not fit for polite company! I'd just make everyone uncomfortable because I'm... me, or disappear into the background like I always do with Star, or –"

"Meteora. Sweetheart. Those two things are exact opposites."

"No, they're not! I'll say and do nothing and they'll still stare at me! And I won't be able to see it, but I'll know , and it'll – it'll..."

Kelly, for the fifteenth time that day, thanked the Giant Hairball in the Sky that Jorby's family was wealthy. Well, not wealthy wealthy, but the kind that had disposable income to spend on small things she wanted. Her own family had been much like that, but Kelly wasn't holding out hope that they'd send her anything. Her family had barely been sending her texts, much less actual money.

And thanks to their money, she could buy art supplies. And she could go to art classes. Even if the paints she picked couldn't be used underwater – even if she couldn't breathe underwater – there was thankfully a spell to dry out a room and create bubbles of air for her to breathe in and hold her less waterproof supplies in. Pity she had to use the family's wand to cast even more spells – seaweed beds didn't do much in her dry room, and countless supplies and knickknacks she'd brought had to be dried off. She'd worried that the Bach family wouldn't like her using the wand so much, but they had merely shrugged. 

"It's not hard to get magic crystals here," Noah, the grandfather, said. "And Jorby's brother, his friends come by all the time and ask for more drying and bubble spells than you will ever need."

"Still, thank you," Kelly had said. "Thank you for everything."

"No problem."

And then Kelly used the family's dimensional scissors, earned by a righteous (and rich) ancestor of theirs, and quickly walked through the portal outside the Salty Pine University of the Arts and Mediums. (Translated literally from the language this takes place in. I'm tired of translating vibes. I guess it's more poetic in that language.) She closed the portal behind her before too much seawater from Jorby's dimension could leak in, popped her air bubble, and looked up at the university. She wasn't properly enrolled, just doing some art classes they offered over the summer, but it still looked very impressive. A large campus, with lots of different buildings. A lot of nice buildings. Kelly looked over her schedule, which she had kept in her head bubble, so it didn't get wet. She looked at the building name. Fine Art and Performance. Did she have a map? She looked in her pouch. No map. Maybe she should ask someone? She looked around. No one in sight.

Oh no...

Aaaand the bell tower on one of the buildings was going off. She was already late.

Meteora was in a dress and makeup her mother (not her servants, she still didn't know if she could trust them not to embarrass her. She'd deserve it) had approved the style of. She was standing just out of sight of Manfred, who had been demoted to only castle crier immediately after being restored to life. At least she thought she was. Standing out of sight, I mean. She was around a corner, but what if the angle wasn't right? He'd surely notice her and make some sort of noise if he could see her. Manfred was always looking for a chance to be passive aggressive to her. Not that she didn't deserve it, but Meteora had a feeling he only did it because he disapproved of her mother and her heritage, and not because of anything she herself did. She wished she could just be hated for the stupid and horrible things she'd done, and not have it be so firmly entwined with whatever stupid and horrible things her mother had done. They were inextricably linked, Meteora supposed. Her mother was the root cause of a lot of things. Would things have been different, if her mother had made less... if her mother had made different decisions? She supposed she would have never been born. Which was... would that be a good thing?

Manfred's voice cut through her thoughts. "Where is that little monster? She's the only one late, and this is her castle! She can't even show up to her own gathering? Disrespectful."

Meteora froze. He was right, wasn't he? She was late. She couldn't see any clocks, but there was no way she was on time. She had spent too much of it hiding and collapsing into an anxious wreck. She couldn't show up like this. She'd already spent too much time not doing this meeting. She should just call it off, pretend she was sick, she –

"Someone dignified like Saint Olga would never raise such an improper, unpunctual brat. Must be her monster father's fault. Or she's gotten lost."

That did it. Meteora strode into the hallway, touching the wall for guidance. She didn't run into him. The carved wooden cane Eclipsa had given her jabbed into him perhaps a little deeper than necessary, telling her where he was. Running into him would be improper, after all, and she was not improper.

Manfred coughed. "Ah, Princess Meteora." He spat the "Princess" part out a little harsher than protocol called for. "Late as usual. Didn't you set the time, Your Highness? Strange you should be so late to your own meeting."

Meteora put on her best winning smile. "Of course, Manfred, but I am so new to this, and was so busy I ran out of time. I sent word ahead that I was late. I don't know what they looked like, of course, but I know they had a Kappan accent. Surely you didn't dismiss them?"

She was lying through her teeth, of course, but there were enough monsters in the castle now that Manfred encountering and dismissing one even that day was a sure bet. And few uninterested folk even knew what a Kappan accent sounded like, so any monsters with an accent – another sure bet – would be suspect.

Manfred bought it hook line and sinker. "M – I apologize, ma'am. I will go ensure the other princes and princesses know you are coming, and that I was, uh, mistaken about the wait." Meteora could feel the nervousness and barely restrained resentment in his voice. He wouldn't inform the crowns that they were supposed to know she'd be late, not in any way that implied any mistake on his part, but lying was worth it if he could be in the wrong for once.

She'd better tell her mother that a monster could fulfill his duties much better. He was a liability and a half, anyways.

Manfred's steps came out of the door, and he cleared his throat. "All rise for her Highness, Meteora Butterfly, High Crown Princess of Mewni!"

Meteora plastered a smile on her face. This was going to be a long night.

Kelly frantically looked for a map. Salty Pine was an interdimensional school, it had a map near the ocean, right? She looked, trying to steady her breathing. There! She found a map. The building she wanted wasn't too far. Not great, but not very far. She bolted towards it.

She raced in, and looked on her sheet for the room number. There. 112. She opened the door, only to find it empty.

"What? I'm not that late!" She checked her watch, which was supposed to be synced up to Earth time. Then she checked the clock on the wall. It was... an hour behind. She looked at her watch again, and sheepishly moved it backwards an hour. She then breathed a huge sigh of relief and curled up by the wall. At least it wasn't an hour behind actual Earth time. That would've been horrible.

Tears pricked the corner of her eyes. She'd always been an emotional wreck – her dad had said she had to get better at that. A true warrior never showed weakness.

Screw her dad. She sniffled, and started sobbing. She would be okay. She wasn't missing out. Sure, it was by good luck – a good warrior never relied on luck – but who cared. She needed that luck, needed something dumb and... floofy. Bubbly and not dependent on her. Not dependent on her skills, or her abilities, just pure good luck.

"I thought I'd be the only one here this early," a voice said, above her. She looked up, to see a fat human with brown skin and pink and purple streaked hair standing over her. They had several piercings and their hair was done up in two messy buns.

"Oh..." Kelly said, quietly. "Uh. Sorry."

"Why're you apologizing?" they asked, sitting down next to her, legs sprawled out, but leaving enough space for her to be comfortable.

"Uh... I cried in front of you. That's really rude."

"No it isn't," they said. "At least, it's not really rude around here. I don't know where... uh, where are you from?"

"Puffland," Kelly said.

"Oh. Well, you weren't crying in front of me. This room was empty, and I just barged in, didn't I? Sorry about that."

"No, no, it's okay," Kelly said. "I'm trying to leave that whole 'crying is for weak-willed cowards who are afraid to repress their feelings like a real puffle' thing behind. It's a weird, messed up thing... but I think it's getting better."

"Right. Puffland is like Palenia, right?"

"Like what?"

"Sorry, I used to be really obsessed with the politics of Ancient Mycean city states. Basically, the Palenians were an ancient people who prioritized fighting prowess above all else. They were violent and cruel, and the small ruling class terrorized their so-called inferiors, holding together their domination only through fear. They weren't all bad; they were really egalitarian for their time, but their focus on strength above all else led them to a constant state of decline, until they were totally wiped out by a magical plague. Turns out you need more than warriors and violently oppressed slaves to build a functioning society."

Kelly nodded. "Yeah, that sounds a lot like Puffland. It's... not a great place, for everyone."

"I guess history repeats itself," they said. "I'm Nova, by the way. They/them. Who're you?"

"I'm Kelly, she/her. I'm a puffle, as you know. I came here... from a friends' house. I want to know how to do something other than constantly fight."

"That must've been hard. My dad, you know... I try to remember him kindly, but... he grew up in a colonizer's family, and he really was brainwashed by them. Never learned a thing about my bio family or tribe from him, had to research it myself. He freaked when I tried to reconnect with them, and when I didn't stop trying, he kicked me out. I'm in a better place now, but... it was awful."

Kelly nodded. "I was only supposed to stay with Jorby for a few nights, but it's been a couple months now, and... I like where I am now. Jorby's really nice, he's like an older brother I never had."

"It's good to know you're safe." She then blushed. "I guess you'd find it weird, me just pouring my heart out to a stranger."

"Hey, I liked it. We have a lot in common," Kelly said. "I get wanting to talk about it. And you were the one who caught me crying. When I realized I was an hour early, I wasn't expecting someone to catch me like that."

"Yeah... I need to take a bus here, and never arrive at my classes at the right time. It's... awkward."

"Not awkward, it makes sense. And it is really nice to meet you," Kelly said.

Nova smiled. "You wanna look at our phones for the rest of the time we're waiting and show each other any cool pictures or great memes we come across, but otherwise not talk to each other?"

Kelly grinned. "You know it."

And that is what they did.

Meteora stepped into the room, to quiet gasps. Her smile became more than a little forced. "Hello, Crowns of Mewni, I am Princess Meteora. I am pleased to make your acquaintance."

A sound of barely constrained laughter. Meteora frowned, turning to the source of the noise. "Am I.. humorous to you?"

"I'm sorry. It's just... you're acting like this prim, proper princess when you're dressed like... that," a high voice said. The voice quickly added: "Not that it isn't fashionable, not with Eclipsa as queen, but... it's not very... serious."

"What?" Meteora asked. She felt her skirt. It was long, but... there was torn fabric along the hem. Wait, what had her mother let her wear? What had her mother snuck on her to wear to a very important meeting?"

"You don't know?" the voice continued.

Another high voice, this one very loud. "Dude, I don't think she knows! But it's very cool, her mom would be, like, super proud. Actually, her mom probably picked the outfit. It's pretty cool, I guess. Totally not just complementing it to make you feel so awesome you mention how nice I was to Star."

Meteora groaned. Well, she was in this deep. "What am I wearing?"

"The best and most expressive punk rock getup I've seen in a while," Tom's voice said. "I love it. It's awesome."

"You look great," the first high voice said. Meteora tried to put a name to it. The second voice was obviously Lilacia Pegasus, but the first voice...

"I'm Princess Penelope Spiderbite, she/her," she said. "And this is my boyfriend, Slime. Any pronouns, but mostly he/him."

"Sup," Slime said, with a slight squishing noise. He was a slime! A monster! Meteora couldn't help but feel a little relieved.

"I'm Tom Lucitor, but you already know that," Tom's familiar voice said. "I love your outfit, but I've already said that."

You would, Meteora thought, but she only nodded politely to Tom.

"I'm Larry Kelpbottom," a nervous low voice said.

"I'M ROCK JOHANSON!" a loud male voice shouted. "OF THE JOHANSONS!"

"And I'm Rich Pigeon," Rich Pigeon said, rounding out the cast.

Meteora nodded. "Well... we are here for me to introduce myself, and –"

"Hey, you don't have to be formal with us, bro," said Slime. "We need an escape from formality. I had no idea being the boyfriend of a princess would mean acting like I had an eye on me at all  times, but here we are."

"Yeah, my parents weren't exactly happy I started dating a monster. They agreed to it when I showed them how good he is at healing spider bites, but... he has to be extra proper at all times or they'll start suggesting he'd do better as a healer than a future king."

Meteora shuddered. "I – I do know about that." She paused, and then continued. "I know how to keep my ear to the ground. Some nobles want to free Gl – my dad, so that my mother will try to have a more Mewman-looking kid. Without horns and a tail. I can respect people not wanting me to be queen, but not because of that ."

Tom shuddered. "Yeah, people are familiar with the Lucitors, and it isn't like anyone else wants to work with ghosts and the undead, but I see so many people who openly want the Butterflys to 'properly conquer' the Underworld."

"Oh, I dig that," Lilacia said. "Mewmans can't even properly fly, but they're still constantly bothering the eagles. Not that we don't bother the eagles a lot too, but Mewmans do it way more annoyingly. If that makes sense. And us Pegasi are always the ones who have to deal with the problems."

"Not to mention us Waterfolk," Larry said, still nervously. "We take care of the entire ocean. And the Mewmans never thank us, or at the very least crack down on all the illegal fishing operations, or do anything to make our job easier. I wish there was another queen like Crescenta. She was a real jerk to everyone else, I heard, but she was nice to us."

"You think that is hard?" Rich Pigeon said, though not arrogantly. "Imagine having rocks thrown at you for just existing somewhere! No one treats pigeons here with any respect! The things they assume about us – disgusting!"

"Wow, uh, I feel kinda weird," Rock Johanson said. "I had no idea you felt that way – wait, is the dirty rat bird talking?"

"Shut up, Johanson," everyone said.

Meteora smiled. "Anyone got a pen and paper? Give me all your complaints, I’ll memorize them and give the list to Mom so she can memorize them too. I may not be able to change hearts, but I can convince my mother to make it illegal to throw rocks at a pigeon!"

Art class was really nice, it turned out. Kelly was terrible at it, she'd never so much as drawn a face before. Perhaps she'd aimed too high with her first art adventure. But it was so fun to put colors on a paper and make pretty stuff with them. And it turned out she had a nice eye for color.

Nova was, of course, better than her. Way better. That day's exercise was drawing a lake, and Nova had drawn a surreal landscape with two suns and several moons. Kelly noted that the moons looked like Mewni, and Nova had eagerly wanted to go there. Kelly noted that she'd have to find a non-grimy part of Mewni to take her to.

"It's a date, then," Nova said.

Kelly blushed, and nodded. They left the painting class in high spirits, holding hands. Kelly brought Nova straight to her flat with her dimensional scissors, and signed her up for interdimensional wireless. The Bachs were well-off, they wouldn't mind. She put her bubble on and went home to keep painting. She was going to be a master someday. A master, like those old white guys the teacher had talked about!

A master like Nova.

Kelly blushed at the thought. That wouldn't be too bad.

Meteora tried. She had tried so hard to get her mother to listen. But Eclipsa was so busy worrying about something that she could tell all her words were falling on deaf ears.

"And – and Rich Pigeon, he wants it – he wants to make it illegal to – to throw rocks at pigeons. Right? And Larry Kelpbottom – he was thinking..."

"Mm-hmm, mm-hmm," Eclipsa said. Meteora couldn't see it, but she was staring at her wand, grasping the handle in a vice grip.

"Mom, I really think you're not listening to me," Meteora said.

"Mm-hmm," Eclipsa said, still looking at only her wand. Meteora couldn't see that, but she could tell Eclipsa was not paying attention. Eclipsa never mm-hmmed her.

Meteora reached out a hand to tap her shoulder. Eclipsa flinched, and looked at her. "I swear I – Meteora?"

"Mother, you're... why weren't you listening to me? What's wrong?"

Eclipsa frowned and bit her lip. "Something... something is wrong with the wand."

Chapter Text

Star was going to do this. She would meet Miquiz where he was, eventually. But first she'd go to Mocel and make her teach Star Septarian Sign Language. She would talk to him, and she would keep him informed on all the wild adventures her and her friends had been on. She was going to do this if it killed her. She didn't even have to worry about Mocel listening in; she wasn't important anymore, not since Meteora had started taking over more and more of her previous duties, and Eclipsa rarely needed her for things anymore.

So she found herself holding in a breath at Mocel's door. She let it out, and knocked twice. 

"Come in!" Mocel's voice said. Star inched in, as Mocel continued: "Here to try some of those weird relaxing spells on us? We – oh, it's you ."

Star closed the door behind her, and smiled nervously, eyes scanning the room. It was a sparse hospital room, with small chairs, a coffee table, and a closet as the only signs it was meant to be... well, not lived in, permanently. And it turned out she didn't have the one-on-one interaction she'd half-hoped she'd have, for Miquiz was there with Mocel. The two were knitting this time. Well, that was okay. Miquiz would know how much she cared about this then. He would see how much she wanted to talk to him, and he'd be impressed, because she was being just the nicest.

She waved. "Uhm, hi Mocel. Hi Miquiz. How are you doing?"

"Very well, thank you. Goodbye, terrible meeting you, get out of my room now," Mocel said. Miquiz put a hand to his snout, covering silent laughter.

"Mocel, uh, I wanted to talk to you! Because... you know, I want to talk to you!"

Mocel sighed. "What do you want to talk to me about?"

"Um, I was wondering if you could, uh, teach me Septarian Sign Language?"

Mocel stared at her, and then glanced at Miquiz, and then back. "Why?"

"To, you know, learn it!" Star said, smiling awkwardly. "I'm very invested in learning it."

Mocel raised an eyebrow. "No."

"What?"

"No. I know you're only asking out of pity and a sense of guilt over putting Miquiz's murderer on the throne. And you are still our enemy in a political sense. Who knows what you'd use understanding of our silent methods of communication for."

Miquiz made a few signs.

"Plus we're not friends. You're not a friend to either of us. We don't care if you can communicate with either of us."

"Miquiz!" Star said. "Aren't you on my side?"

Miquiz signed, and Mocel snorted. "He says he's on no one's side but anarchy. He's still a bit of a rebellious teen. Got him in a bad situation in life, you should've listened to your elders."

Miquiz signed some more, this time for a longer time, and Mocel practically guffawed. "He says 'I had to not listen; how else would I be rotting alone in this hole? Taulitza truly has a plan for us all... amen.'"

"Huh?" Star asked, confused.

"Yeah, didn't think you'd get it," Mocel said, waving dismissively at Star. "Please go away."

"Come on! I want to talk to you! Please just teach me sign language!"

"Princess, we already explained why we won't to you. Do us a favor and learn that lesson. But, just in case you can't understand: we don't want your pity. We don't want your patronizing conversation. If you won't see us as equals, go ahead and leave and never come back. I'd like it if you did."

"I'm not being patronizing! I see you as an equal!"

"Really? Why did you come here?"

"I wanted to be able to talk to Miquiz!"

"Why's that?"

"Because – after all he's been through – he deserves – he..."

"Pity. Exactly. We don't need that from you, High Princess. Go away."

Star looked down, and thought. Was she really doing this... out of pity? And guilt? Was she... she had to make something right, right? "I have information."

"What?"

"You – you're a spy, right? And I might not be Crown Princess anymore, but I know a lot of information that you probably want to hear."

Mocel glanced at Miquiz, who looked interested. "Fine, Princess. Enlighten us. Explain the weather, too. Miquiz misses the sun."

"Well... uh, this all happened inside, but... the other day, Marcie and Eclipsa and I... Eclipsa was testing out spells on Rhombulus's crystal donuts, and... uh, we took a break, and... Marcie noticed the hole I blew in the tunnel to save my mom, and I was like, and she was like 'hey what if we checked out where that leads?' And I was like 'Marcie, those tunnels hate me.' And she was like 'okay, I'll go on my own.' And I..."

Star groaned, running a hand down her face. "Fine, I'm not letting you go into those awful tunnels alone."

"I dunno, maybe you're right. Having you go along could be a detriment, not a good thing," Marcie said, making an exaggerated thinking pose. "I don't think you should be allowed in any tunnels."

Star punched her in the shoulder. "Marcie!"

"I'm joking. Mostly," Marcie said, grinning. "Okay, let's go."

They walked into the tunnel, and looked both ways. On one end was light, and stairs familiar to the structure they were in. The other way was dark, and sloped down.

Star sighed. "I'm guessing you don't want to check the one we can actually see inside."

"When you do that hand-fire spell you've been practicing, we'll be able to see this end too," Marcie said, pulling Star down the dark end.

Star rolled her eyes, and set one of her hands on fire. They walked down, down, down, in a spiraling pattern into the depths. Or, well, not very far down, actually. Star just thought it was longer than it was, because she was scared of every bit of it.

There were unburnt torches along the wall. Marcie studied them, and grabbed one and lit it on Star's hand, and then used it to look at the walls, which were absolutely crazy with carvings – pictograms of monsters, and words in an alphabet Marcie couldn't understand. But from the pictograms... it seemed to be... rules. On what one could and couldn't do. Strange. And... the words appeared to be multilingual, with several styles of alphabet. Was this... a study tunnel, or something?

They kept walking downward. Down, until they came to... a giant door. It was made out of metal, and had intricate designs patterning its surface. Marcie put her torch in the ground in front of the door and stared.

"Huh. Is it locked?" Star asked. She looked around for a doorknob and, not finding one, pushed on the door.

Marcie stopped her. "We have to look at the door first. We can't just bang it down, we have to study it!" She looked closer, and... "Wow... this is really cool."

"What?" Star asked, still trying to push on the door.

"Well, the most interesting thing is the tree," Marcie said, gesturing to the tree carving encompassing most of the door. It was a massive leafless tree, to be sure. But... "It's made of stone."

"Yeah, so's the rest of the tunnel."

"But the door's made of metal!" Marcie said, excitedly. "This is such a beautiful work of art, I can't imagine it. It's so thin and delicate..." She walked forwards, and touched the inlaid stone. There was a flash, and a green hologram appeared.

Marcie gasped, and stepped back, but the hologram stayed. It was of a Mewman choking, and words, in Mewman, said "DANGER!" and "MEWMANS DO NOT TRAVEL BEYOND THIS POINT!" and of course "THIS PLACE IS A MESSAGE... AND PART OF A SYSTEM OF MESSAGES... PAY ATTENTION TO IT!"

"Huh. I am suddenly glad I wasn't able to open this door," Star said.

Marcie frowned. "But who would put up this enchantment..."

Star grabbed Marcie, and pulled her away. "Okay, I think we've seen all there is to see, let's get out of here this is creepy."

Marcie snapped a picture, and let Star drag her away. "Well, I have plenty of things to think about," she said, studying the photo. It was then she noticed the branches of the tree formed a four-pointed star. "Strange," she noticed. Somehow it always came back to that four-pointed star.

"Sounds like whenever Marcie is about to come to an insightful conclusion, you interrupt her," Mocel said. "Though I will concede that it's interesting that you know about the Beacon. That's all that's interesting. Unfortunate, but not unexpected."

Miquiz signed something, and Mocel nodded, but didn't translate. "Yeah, and not nearly enough weather, either. Though, I'd be careful with the door if I were you, by the way." Mocel directed that last bit to Star. "What else can you tell us?"

"You weren't satisfied with that?" Star asked. "Come on, my life isn't that interesting!"

"Yeah, and my mother's a Mewman," Mocel said, rolling her eyes. "You're the right hand of the queen of Mewni, even if you apparently don't want to be."

"Uh..." Star said, tapping on the uncomfortable hospital chair Miquiz had offered her, because he may not like her, but he wasn't rude . "I'm planning Eclipsa's official coronation. I don't... know how much you'd be interested... but there's more monsters in Mewni village and all over Mewni than ever."

Mocel and Miquiz both looked interested, so Star continued.

Anna was bored. That was the biggest thing going on right now, definitely. Not the giant manticore carriage outside their door, not the fact that they were packing up literally everything, no, the most important thing was that Anna was bored and May had to keep her from running off and getting eaten by something.

Forces of Evil, May disliked, no, hated children. She would never, ever have any of her own.

"Dad! Shizie!" she shouted, grabbing Anna to keep her from chasing a butterfly. "Anna is bored again! Why do I have to pay attention to her? Why can't you do it?"

Her dad, a familiar dog man, stuck his head out of one of their hut's windows. "We're packing, sweetheart. We're going to a nicer place for your shizie's job."

"You and Shizie always went on about how important our house was!" May said. "Now we're going to leave?"

"Yes, we are," Dad said. "We're going to a bigger house, with lots of room and a better job that gives us a lot more money. Which will," he said, as May opened her mouth to protest, "mean we get better food, and more food more often. We can have three meals a day every single day."

"Every day?" May gasped.

"Every day. Does that sound worth watching your sister for a bit while we finish packing?"

May frowned. "I dunno. I'll have to think about it."

Dad laughed. "I bet you will."

Later that day, after everything had been packed and an irate lion with scissors cut open a blue hole in the air before muttering something about how Eclipsa was ruining Mewni, after they came to the biggest house May had ever ever seen, May sat on her old cot in her new room that was all her own and stared up at the ceiling so far above her. "This is so weird," she decided. "It's really weird."

"May!" Dad shouted. And he had to shout. Loudly, and May nearly didn't hear him. "Come to the kitchen!"

"Coming, Dad!" May shouted, and got up. She ran to one of the bigger rooms, where they had put all their chairs. She had to run through so many rooms that didn't have a thing in them at all. They were far too small for this house, May decided. 

"Good to see you. I wanted to call a family meeting, because you're going to have an early bedtime today, because we're going to be waking up early tomorrow. You're going to school!" Dad said, as if that was good news.

"What? Early?" May groaned. "I don't want to wake up early!"

"You woke up early when we had that slug farm," Shizie said. 

May snorted. "I didn't like it. I was happy when you sold all those stupid slugs."

"Well, you will have fun this time. You'll meet all kinds of people your age, and you'll learn lots of new things that you can tell us about at the end of every day," Dad said. "We'll learn everything we can from you. It'll be your job to teach us everything we don't know. And there's a lot we don't know."

Shizie nodded. "You'll become so smart we'll be way behind. And you'll do a way better job at any fancy position you'd like, unlike me." He frowned, and glanced at Dad, who shook his head, looking pointedly at May. 

"But I can meet people my age without waking up early, and I don't care about learning and stuff. I don't want to go to school."

"Your sister will have to go too."

"Deal."

Star did not tell that story. She didn't even know May and Anna existed. But she did talk about their shizie, the horned toad monster Beetle, and the many other monsters recruited as advisors and workers in Butterfly Castle. She told the truth, mostly. That a lot of them were nicer than her mother's previous advisers, that Eclipsa never really listened to her monster or Mewman advisors and just did her own thing, that her mother was... trying her best not to act upset by it, but Star could tell she didn't like the changes Eclipsa was making.

"Hah! Of course she doesn't. Good Ol' Moon the Undaunted would never like monsters running around in her precious castle. Tell me, did Eclipsa have to beg her to adjust the shields?"

"No, my mom did that a long time ago! The only monsters who aren't allowed in are Septarians, and they're all gone now, so... wait a minute. Do you know why all the Septarians are gone? And where they are?"

"Us? Know anything about Septarians?" Mocel said, smiling faux-innocently. "We would never."

Miquiz signed something. Mocel snorted, but didn't translate.

"Come on! Surely it's not that important."

Mocel rolled her eyes at that. "Yes, we pulled off the greatest kidnapping of every single Septarian in the entire multiverse for no important reason. It's no big deal."

"You took them against their will?" Star asked.

"Not even Septarians are a monolith, kiddo. You want an entire group of people to go into hiding, it's inevitable that some will have to be taken by force."

"That's awful!"

"Better than the alternative. They were being cautious, but I think they made the right move. This late in the game, it's inevitable that he'll try to throw a book in the works."

"Who's he?"

Glossaryck burst into existence. "Star, your presence is required by Queen Eclipsa, in her private chambers. Where were you? The wand's been acting up again, and, well, we need you there."

Star frowned. "I was just talking to these nice –"

A fly swatter whooshed through the air, smacking Glossaryck into the table. "I knew that would come in handy!" Mocel said proudly, twirling the swatter in the air by an ash-reinforced hand. 

"Mocel!" Star shouted. "Why did you do that? He hasn't even done anything yet!"

"Thanks... Star..." Glossaryck wheezed out.

"His mere presence is reason itself!" Mocel said, hitting him again one more time for good measure. Oh no, she's hot . "Get out of my room, you little... uh... twit."

"I am everywhere –"

SMACK! "You'd better be everywhere except my living space fast, or I'll break those little wings of yours."

"Fine. Star. Butterfly Castle. Now," Glossaryck said, and disappeared. I wish I could make Glossaryck disappear whenever I wanted.

Mocel relaxed. "Okay, whew. Wait. What was that about? Eclipsa's a professional wand-user. Why would the wand be failing now? Unless..." She blinked. "Oh no."

Miquiz dropped his knitting, drawing the same connection Mocel had made and Star totally failed to grasp. He froze up, claws scraping against the side of the plastic chair. Then he made the first noise Star had ever heard from him. A low keening noise. 

Mocel raced to him. "Miquiz, it'll be okay. We will stop this. They'll stop this. It'll be okay."

Miquiz shook his head, and Star was once again struck by how young he was. She was at that precocious age where everyone even a year younger than her was just a little baby, but Miquiz was tiny even for fourteen. Tears were brimming in his eyes. 

"What can I –" Star started.

Mocel glared at her, Miquiz in her arms. "Leave. Go away."

Star wanted to protest. But. This was not a good time.

She walked for the door.

"Star..." Mocel said, as she reached the doorway, "when you're done with... this, please come back here. We'll need to talk."

Star nodded, and left.

She wouldn't keep that promise, either.

Chapter Text

"Alright, Glossaryck," Eclipsa said. She held out the wand. "Whenever I cast a spell, this is what happens. Midnight Shriek!"

A bubble of dark liquid oozed out of her wand, and splattered on the floor of Eclipsa's bedroom. Star, Marcie, Meteora, and Glossaryck gasped as it bubbled and hissed, and quickly dissolved the floor underneath it, and then dropped below it. Screams echoed up from the floor below them. Something about weird acid, could the Queen of Darkness give them five uninterrupted minutes, Forces of Evil, just five minutes, blah blah blah.

"You see? Midn –"

Glossaryck shoved her wand down. "Yeah, maybe let's not do that again."

"I suppose you're right."

"It seems corrupted," Star said. "Has Toffee gotten in there again? Trying an encore for their weird corrupting the magic bit?"

"No, can't be." Glossaryck sniffed the wand. He turned pale. "This is worse. Way worse. Oh no, this is the beginning of... the end. Everything's going to come crashing down, but this time it's me who's falling. I knew she would win in the end."

"What?" Eclipsa and Star said, together.

"What does that mean?" Meteora finished.

"It... nothing. Ignore that. Let's just go into the wand. Star, you know the jist. Find the thing that doesn't belong." Glossaryck raised his hands to clap, but Star quickly stopped him, by grabbing him and holding his hands apart.

"No. We need to give them more information than that. We don't want what happened last time to happen this time, right Glossaryck?"

"Well, to be fair, you were much more distractible back then."

"Well, Eclipsa, Meteora, and Marcie are not! They pay attention! I'm sure they excel at school! So we're going to explain to them every bit of information they need to know, and how dangerous this is! We don't want them to get lost in the wand or overwritten. Right ?"

"Overwritten?" Marcie asked.

"Well, yes," Glossaryck said. "That is fair."

"And you, sir, are going to use that magic eye of yours to make us a bunch of glue, to stick us together, so we don't get separated."

Marcie snorted. Classic Star.

"I cannot do that. But I guess I could make some magic rope. Or, better yet, you could," Glossaryck said, pointing at Star.

"I could? Why not you?"

"Because you have all the magic you could want, and Eclipsa depends on the wand, which is corrupted."

Marcie had questions, specifically about the first bit. But maybe no one was interested, so she stayed quiet.

Star shrugged. "Sure, tell me the spell. Rhyme. Whatever."

Glossaryck showed her, and soon she had two magic ropes. "Okay, Star, two more and you just tie these around your waist and have someone pull on them, and you'll be dragged back into the surface world."

Star nodded. Then: "Wait, who?"

"I dunno, maybe one of the servants or something."

"Nope. Marcie, Meteora, you hold the ropes. The less people that can get lost in there, the better. When we pull three times, we need you to bring us back. Deal?"

Marcie nodded. Meteora said yes. Both were disappointed that they couldn't see what was inside the wand, but they didn't vocalize it.

"One last thing," Star said, turning to Eclipsa. "When we're in the wand, nothing is real. Nothing. And you must listen to the sound of my and Glossaryck's voices, or we will be separated. Keep your focus on us, nothing else. I don't care if Globgor himself shows up – and he probably will, because the wand runs on memories – that is not the real Globgor. Do not listen to him. Focus on me and Glossaryck. Find the thing that doesn't belong, and we're getting the heck out of there. And the thing that doesn't belong is not something you remember turning up in an odd place. It's something that genuinely does not belong in your memories. Got that?"

Eclipsa finished putting down notes in a notebook Marcie had handed her. "Yes," she said, and recited everything Star had told her.

"Anything you'd like to add, Glossaryck?"

"No, that about covers it."

"Alright. Let's go inside."

Glossaryck clapped his hands, and they were in. "Let's do this," Star said, eyes narrowed.

"But nothing changed," Eclipsa said, looking around. Same mid-renovation, out of the way castle room.

"We're in the memory of this room," Star said, pointing at where Eclipsa's wand used to be. There was no wand. Also Marcie and Meteora were gone, and their ropes now pointed towards Glossaryck's eye.

"Oh my," Eclipsa said. She folded her hands together. "This is strange."

Star nodded. "Yeah, it's pretty weird. Remember to listen to me and Glossaryck, and tug three times if we get separated."

"Yes, Star," Eclipsa said, smiling. "I am capable of remembering things."

"Good, 'cause I was so not," Star said. "Let's find this thing." She kicked down the door, and stepped out, into the great hall (the cafeteria) of the Beacon, but a much cleaner and more cared-for version. Tables and picnic blankets and chairs, some of them pushed out as if someone was sitting on them, stood at regular intervals across the room. There was no one living there. Not a soul. The quiet lifelessness pressed in from all sides.

"This is so... eerie," Eclipsa said, looking at a half-eaten plate. "We're really all alone, aren't we?"

"Yeah, well, do you always imagine people when reminiscing about places you've been before?" Glossaryck asked.

"I suppose not," Eclipsa replied.

"Come on guys, we have to focus on finding this thing and staying together! We can't lose focus!" Star said.

"Stop saying 'focus' so much," Glossaryck said. "It's, you know, annoying."

"Oh, I'm annoying?" Star asked. "You're the one who never made sure I understood anything important before you tossed me into danger!"

Glossaryck rolled his eyes. "I don't think you would have listened to me before the danger arrived," he huffed. "Remember the Warnicorn incident?"

Star huffed. "Yeah, we must be remembering that wrong, because I don't remember you even trying to tell me your plan before you hid in that donut box."

"What?" Eclipsa said in the background. She was right to say it, I didn't understand that bit either and I know Glossaryck and his weird little plans well.

But she wasn't saying that for those reasons. She said it because while Star and Glossaryck were arguing, the scenery was melting away like butter in a pan, and being replaced with a rather beautiful sanctum. The Magic Sanctuary.

She was trying to pay attention only to Star and Glossaryck, but something was wrong. Eclipsa could feel it. Also, the magic well was oozing dark purple slime, which was another clear sign.

Star and Glossaryck stopped arguing as purple ooze spread across the floor. "Yeah, that definitely doesn't belong," Star said. "Right?"

"I've never seen something like this," Eclipsa said. "Magic is supposed to be gold, not purple, right?"

"...yes," Glossaryck said. "Yes. This is not good. It's bad."

The Sanctuary shook, and ooze lapped at their boots, and they began to sizzle. Star quickly turned into her butterfly form and grabbed Eclipsa, holding her hovering off the quickly dissolving ground. "Okay, we've found the thing that doesn't belong. How do we get it?"

"I... don't know," Glossaryck said. "I'm stumped. This kind of thing hasn't happened before. Probably because... well. It's very bad news."

"Dang. Never happened before?" Star asked. "Well, we gotta do some –"

And then the wandscape did something for her. The magic well shook, and a pillar of ooze flowed out of the well, spinning to form a giant vortex. It reached for Star and Eclipsa.

Star frantically flew backwards, slamming into the wall of the Sanctuary. Reality glitched, and for a second the well was not a well and the dragon sculptures were all looking at her and their eyes and mouths were dripping sludge and they were smiling at her and the oily purple sludge coming from the well – mouth – thing was not just magic but something far worse. It was full of strings and stardust and flayed thread. And it was coming for them.

With no magic of her own, and the wand out of her reach, Eclipsa couldn't do much but trust that Star would be able to fly them out of danger. Star knew this, and fired everything she had at the well. "Mega Narwhal Blast!" The narwhals dissolved into dark purple dust at contact with the vortex. She didn't see them hit, however, because she used that time to move out of the way.

Glossaryck did nothing, because he is a dumb useless idiot.

The well seemed to anticipate their movements, however, swerving to catch them almost before she had made the decision to turn. It slammed into them. Star put up a bubble shield, but the acid corroded the parts it touched. The only way to stay safe was to sit at the center of the vortex, in the eye of the storm, pinned right where it wanted them. If... it wanted anything at all. And then something glowed from the darkness around them. A giant spectral something reached up from the depths of the well. A golden spectral arm-thing. "Magic?"

As Eclipsa said it, the claw – hand – pincer wrapped around her, and the dark vortex receded into the well once again, dragging Eclipsa, and a desperately holding on Star, to the center of the Magic Sanctuary.

"Glossaryck! Help!" Star shouted, straining against the might of magic itself threatening to drag Eclipsa into its depths. The only thing keeping her in place was that the magic did not want to drag her in as well.

"I think this is time for an emergency exit!" Glossaryck said, grabbing Eclipsa's rope and pulling it three times. On the surface, Meteora started pulling. Eclipsa started lifting out of the pit, with only a few singe marks on her dress. Star let go of Eclipsa to help Meteora pull on the rope. 

And then the leaked dark magic surged through the air, cutting the rope in two and sending Eclipsa to the depths of the corrupted Realm of Magic.

Meteora pulled up the rope, and found it severed.

Star turned to Glossaryck. "What the... what? I thought... I thought nothing could... nothing could hurt you in the wand! I thought it was – the danger was clones replacing us and never getting out, not death!"

"Not this time," GLossaryck said, looking down the calm, no-longer-leaking well. "When dealing with magic, you might need to also deal with Magic, with a capital M. But Star, she's not dead."

"What?" Star said. "You saw the acid! It'll eat her alive!"

"Magic won't let her die. It's corrupted, but not enough that it can't ensure her safety."

"So she'll be fine?"

"The question is whether we can find her again. Staying here won't help, that's not how the dreamscape works. And... whether you'll be fine in the meantime."

Star huffed. "Yeah, we must be remembering that wrong, because I don't remember you telling me your plan before you hid in that donut box."

"What?" Eclipsa's voice asked, and then there were two Stars and one Eclipsa in the room, reacting to an imaginary Glossaryck.

"Yeah, I don't want to go through that again," Star said. "Unless –"

"No, we can't bring that Eclipsa out. I'm on Magic's bad side already, I'm not going to rewrite the encounter with Eclipsa they went to so much trouble to stage."

"Right, of course. Let's get out of here."

Glossaryck snapped his fingers, and they moved.

It did not take long for the clones to catch up to them. Whenever they jumped somewhere, they only had a few minutes to catch their breath before their new memories became their old memories and their current timeline was overwritten by future versions of themselves. No, I cannot make it make sense. Stop asking, mortal.

"Yeah, this is getting bad," Glossaryck said, as three different Stars agreed with him at the same time. "We need to find Eclipsa fast."

"Yeah, but how?" Star asked.

"Yeah, but –"

"Shut up!"

"Yeah –"

"Shut up!"

"Ugh!"

"Ugh!"

"Ugh!"

"Yeah, this is getting insufferable," Glossaryck said. "Stars, please be quiet. I need to think. Oh. Wait, that's simple. If she's in the magic, she'll..."

"What?"

"What?"

"What?"

"Star, please shut it."

Eclipsa woke up in a strange place. If one could call it a place. It was a place and a person and an idea all at once. It was a dungeon full of buried corpses, it was a broken and destroyed golden throne room, it was a home she'd never set foot in and always had lived inside. And it was sick. Horribly sick.

"Hello?" Eclipsa asked, standing up and looking around.

Everything around her was shifting and changing with every tilt of her head. "Oh. Of course," she said. "Hello, Spirit of the Magic."

The Spirit of Magic did not usually speak with words. It didn't have to. It made its presence known with feelings and impressions, and even if it didn't, its language was one from beyond the stars, not something small ones like Eclipsa could understand. But it could not communicate these things in mere feelings. It had to make itself heard.

So a thread – tentacle – feeler jerked out of the darkness and stabbed into Eclipsa's head. It did not hurt, for she was too close to magic to feel any pain from its presence. She felt it rifling through her memories, and in a moment that lasted a thousand years it understood her and learned her language.

" YOu... hURt me... " it said with a constructed approximation of a throat.

"Yes," Eclipsa nodded. "I'm sorry. How do I fix it?"

" You CAnnOT FiX ThIs! NOt yoU. I waS bOrn oUtsiDE oF YouR MultIVERse... OUTsidE of YOur SpACe aND tIMe... i WAs CreATeD to Be A briDGE bETWeen YoUR unIvErsE. ThE FouR Who ruLE tHis WoRLd aNd mANy oTheRS SmIlED DowN oN Me aND tHis tHe mUltiVerSE. BuT It waS Not To laST. We WerE FooLisH. Me, mY CReatORs, aND tHE One tHEy gAve Me tO. He LEt Me GRoW siCK, mADe Me sIcK."

"Yes, it was my fault. I'm sorry," Eclipsa said.

"nO! YouR prOBleM wAs ONly a SYMptom. In mY FeVeRED sTaTE, aND BecAUSe He HaS giVen You anD YoU oNLy OnE oF My PReCioUS WeLLs, i LeT ThROUGh SOmEthing ThAt coNTrAdICtED tHe EDIcTS of ThIs UNivErSe. my FaULT as MUCH AS yoURs, But i CouLd HAVe stoppeD It Had yOu noT GIvEN it a homE In YOuR WAnD And HANds. But now it IS frEe aND IT WILL DEStROy aNd destroY aND –"

Eclipsa flicked the thread still standing near her. "You're looping. How can I help? I'm sure we can figure this out."

"YOu caNNOt Help! NOT YOu. noT yoU. Never You."

"If not me, then who can help you?" 

"yOu mUSt gIvE Me bacK."

"What?"

"GIVe Me to sOMeonE who CAn HeAl ME. wHo cAn fIx wHaT is broken."

"Oh. Back to your creators?"

"IF That Is what WoRKS."

"I'll make sure of it. I'm sorry. I... I no longer want the same things I wanted then. But... I have to get back to Glossaryck."

The Spirit was annoyed by that, Eclipsa could tell. But it accepted it. "VERY wELL."

The surrounding faded, which was good, since Eclipsa was beginning to get a headache, replaced with a grey void. And not far away were Star and Glossaryck, past and future versions of Star fading, until only Eclipsa's Star remained.

Eclipsa flew – flew ? – towards them. She wrapped four arms around Star and pulled Glossaryck into her embrace with her remaining two. "Star, Glossaryck, it's so good to see you. Are you okay?"

"I should be asking you that question!" Star said, wiggling out of Eclipsa's embrace. "What happened? I thought you were dead for sure!"

"The Spirit of Magic wanted to have a chat with me," Eclipsa said. She glanced at Glossaryck, and then away. Is he...? "Apparently my dark spell is spreading and... destroying everything in its wake. We have to stop it, without making things worse."

"How do we stop a dark spell?" Star wondered.

"How do we stop a dark spell?" Star wondered.

"Hey! Go away!"

"Hey –"

"Okay, let's get out of here," Glossaryck said, grabbing Star and Eclipsa and jamming them into his eye.

An enormous eyeball appeared, it popped, eyeball juice, gross, etc. Star fell to the floor, and Eclipsa hovered in place. "Wait!" Eclipsa looked at herself. She was... a butterfly! Great green, gray, and purple wings spread behind her, patterned in spades. Her three arms were all stained purple, but it almost looked like gloves instead of scars. She felt her forehead. On it were long, branching antennae, and her sense of smell was heightened. "Wow."

"Wow," Marcie repeated. "Also, I have a million questions."

"What?" Meteora asked.

"Of course you do," Eclipsa laughed. She concentrated, and the butterfly form faded, and she was regular Eclipsa again. "I guess being that close to Magic itself makes strange things happen."

"Yeah," Star said. "But... what was that about a dark spell?"

"The spirit said it accidentally let something into this world to destroy me when I attacked it. It was sick, and not in its right mind. It said we have to give it back to its creators, and they'll fix it," Eclipsa summarized, badly.

"Weird," Star said. "I have no idea how we'd do that. Is your wand working?"

Eclipsa experimentally cast Midnight Shriek. It... worked. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief. "But we didn't do anything..."

"I think the memories the Spirit got from your mind helped," Glossaryck said. "But like before, it'll only be a stopgap measure. We can't count on this to do anything."

"Okay. Marcie, you're on research duty. See what you can scrounge up on stopping a dark magic plague. The rest of us are on... coronation duty!" Star said, like it was a triumph of planning and foresight. 

"Um. I have questions," Marcie said. "Isn't stopping a dark magic evil threatening to destroy the world more important than a coronation?"

"Yes, but it can wait. The coronation has to happen as soon as possible, and it has to be perfect. Dark magic can wait a few weeks. We won't be able to do anything if a horde of common folk rise against us because they refuse to see Eclipsa as a rightful queen."

"Do you really think that will help?" Meteora asked.

"Star does have a point," Eclipsa said. "We need to solidify our position before we can focus on this new problem. One problem at a time, I suppose."

"Do you guys hear yourselves?" Marcie said. "We need to fix this! We don't even know how urgent this is."

"We will fix it. Just not today," Eclispa said. "But you'll research, and you'll tell us how much time we have, right?"

"I don't have anything to research!" Marcie said. 

"Don't worry, I'll lend you the Mewni Historical Society."

"They're dead!"

"They are? I thought those guys were immortal." Eclipsa tsked. "Well, I'm sure Mewni isn't the only place with magic. Use those dimensional scissors of yours and explore the Multiverse. There's lots of things to be found there."

Marcie frowned. "That's... it?"

"Yes, it is."

Star sighed, and made a loud groaning noise. "As for me, I have so much to do and so little time to do it. But I have the rest of today free... so I'm going to take a nap."

"That's it, huh," Marcie said. "That's it."

She would need to do research. So much research. She would prove that they needed to fix this. Whatever "this" was.

The Spirit of Magic smiled down on her.

Chapter Text

It started slowly, as many things of this nature do. A gradually heated pot, if you will. It starts, as a few things start, with Ludo and Dennis and their siblings. Ludo and Dennis and their siblings stood in front of Castle Avarius, ready to rebuild and remodel and probably gentrify their neighborhood with spider silk.

The castle did not exist anymore. "The castle we knew is gone," Dennis said.

“Good riddance!" Ludo shouted, tossing a half-gone brick at the few ruined foundations that remained. "There's nothing in this whole stupid castle worth saving. It's bad memories all the way down."

"Yes, but our family history! Even if Dad was bad, I still valued the thought... that we still had a history here, a place. But it's all gone."

"Who cares, we're cold, and there's nothing out here!" Dudo shouted. "Where do we sleep?"

"That's where Bird and Spider come in!" Ludo crowed. "Ladies, do your thing!"

The spider and the bird unraveled their giant bundle of silk and wove it into a large cocoon. It wasn't a tall spire like last time, the higher gravity in Mewni wouldn't allow that. But it was a large beehive-shaped building that the eagle reinforced with the fallen trees and masonry around the blast radius.

It was odd that none of the fallen trees were rotten, despite them lying on the ground for so long. Stranger things have happened, I suppose, but what came after would prove that this was no coincidence.

Ludo pushed aside the silk curtain covering the entrance and beckoned his siblings in. "Come in, come in! It's beautiful in here. Come on, come on!"

As Yudo was coming into the new building, he tripped. He brushed the dirt off and looked down to the ground. "Ludo, Dennis, come here! I think there's something weird here!"

Ludo and Dennis looked at each other and went to Dudo. "What are we looking at?" Ludo asked.

"There's a trapdoor!" Dudo said, shoving the dirt and shards of stone away from the door.

"That's so cool!" Dennis said, stars in his eyes.

But Ludo was less impressed. "It just leads to the library. Boring stuff, only a bunch of moth-eaten books in there."

"A library? It survived the explosion?" Dennis gasped. "We gotta go in there!"

"No!" Ludo said, putting his foot down on the trapdoor. "It's creepy in there. Covered in smaller, hairy spiders and their webs, there's a bookworm infestation, and the ladder was made of wood –"

"A lot of things are made of wood," Dennis said, puzzled. 

"Wood that rots easily! It's not safe. Plus, the only one who went down there regularly was Toffee, and they're bad news. Anything they touch is bad news. We're not going down there."

"But Ludo –"

"No buts. We aren't touching something that Toffee touched. Come on. We're all tired and we need some rest."

"We'll talk about this again in the morning, byeeee!" Dudo said and dashed into the silk building. Dennis gave a half-shrug, half-nod of agreement.

Ludo groaned. "Just my luck."

The inside of the building was massive, naturally. A many-tiered atrium with each floor having hammocks coming down from the ceiling. Ludo found himself a hammock on the ground floor, being unable to fly. Spider had woven him his own hammock that was more him-sized, but he took another hammock and made Cludo take the small one. The spider chittered in disappointment, but Ludo ignored her and got in. He was asleep before he hit the pillow, if that were possible.

Ludo woke to gasps and yells of excitement. He rolled over and stared at the ceiling. "What is going on? I swear, if you make me wake –"

"Dudo has mind powers!" someone yelled.

"It's telekinesis!" someone else yelled.

"What?" Ludo asked, getting up and looking at the spectacle. 

"It's not me!" Dudo shouted pointing at a worm one of the siblings had caught that was floating in the air unsupported.

"Oh no, not this again," Ludo groaned. He shoved the hammock's pillow around his ears and closed his eyes. "I'm not here!"

"Yeah you are!" said a bunch of siblings, and they started rocking the hammock.

"I remember why I thought you were annoying now," Ludo groaned. "I am having no part in any telekinesis shenaniganry. Go ask Dennis for help."

The siblings looked at each other. One poked Ludo's hammock one last time, and then a flapping of wings and they were gone. Ludo sighed. Great, now he was feeling sorry for Dennis. But he really did not want to deal with any telekinetic powers ever again. Never again. And he was tired, and the bed was soft, and Dennis was better than he could ever hope to be at this kind of thing.

He was useless, anyways. Wouldn't help a thing.

He soon fell asleep, and woke up in a strange dreamscape. A big pink heart with a cruel glimmer to it cracked open, and two creatures came from its depths, two birds wearing a crown. A great gecko threatened to steal their crown, but they flew back into the heart and the heart blasted away the gecko, killing it. The birds watched from the cracked heart in horror. They made a vow to stay together, and to ensure that the crown they were given would stay strong even if the heart failed. Even when the heart failed.

Ludo woke up confused. Well, that was a very strange and bizarre dream full of pretentious symbolism and important information that I'm going to ignore because I'm the idiot in a horror movie prepackaged in a fun-sized bird. Feeling satisfied with himself, he moved around in his bed to get more comfortable. Then:

"Ludo."

"What is it, Dennis?" Ludo asked, turning and looking at Dennis, arms crossed.

Dennis looked... upset. "Ludo, there are floating rocks outside. Apparently there have been floating objects everywhere. And apparently, you have known about this for quite some time, but you did nothing. And apparently you did so little that you didn't even bother to check if the children got distracted by passing air molecules and actually went to find me. Did I leave anything out?"

"No, that about sums it up. I need my beauty rest, and I do not mess with telekinesis. Way too many bad experiences. I'm going back to bed."

Dennis growled. "Sometimes I wonder if you're helping at all!" He turned and stomped away, several siblings clinging to him and making his dramatic exit difficult. Several more siblings were tapping floating rocks to see what they did. Nothing, so far.

Yudo was far too afraid of the rocks to touch them, but that didn't save him. From his place in a corner, he started floating.

Ludo was too busy stewing in his own self-pity to notice. Dennis was angry with him. Dennis was angry with him because he wasn't helping with a problem. A telekinesis problem. He was not going to mess with weird, otherworldly auras that made things float. He couldn't. And he couldn't be good at helping anyways. He was way too messed up for that to work out right. He'd help later. He'd help so much that Dennis would never be mad at him again.

Ludo fell asleep again, to the tune of his own wild plans, and another dream came to him. The birds weathered many storms, but, with the heart's help, managed to build a beautiful castle on a hill. But then the heart died, and they were left alone. Their subjects, for a crown always meant subjects, hated them, and their own bad decisions made them a laughingstock to the other crowns of the land. And then they died, and their spirits, fueled by a desire to protect the crown, stayed on. They were unable to follow their deceased subjects to the afterlife or to those strange misty mountains those with a grudge against this world lived their post-lives in. So they remained in the castle on the hill forever and ever, guarding the crown.

And then the gecko's child and teacher, a strange creature not entirely of the world, but not entirely of the otherworld either, arrived. They dethroned the birds' descendants, destroyed their castle in the hill, and broke the crown. The birds were shattered and destroyed. But they could not turn their ire on the gecko child, for they were the master of all the ghosts of the misty mountains, and far too clever for the birds to have a chance to win, or even a chance to fight in the first place. So instead the birds vowed revenge on their descendants, the ones who had allowed this to happen. Their precious crown was broken, so they would have their revenge... one way or another.

Ludo blinked awake. Then he saw that the entire house was dark, and he couldn't see anyone, anywhere. Not even the spider and the bird were there. Everyone was just... gone. "Dennis? You've just taken everyone out to play, right? ...right?"

He remembered his dream. "Oh no."

Ludo looked around, to make sure the dream was actually a prophetic dream and not some undigested bug and trash juice. There was not a soul on the aboveground Castle Avarius groundlands. So he unspooled some spider silk, grabbed a half-melted rock, and threw open the trapdoor to the library.

The ladder was surprisingly intact. Not a rotted pile like Ludo was expecting. But he opted to climb down on a rope of spider silk anyways. The ladder was... a bit too big for him to climb easily.

He combed the library, searching every nook and cranny for a trace of his siblings, or secret entrances, or even trails in the dust. But there was nothing.

Ludo growled, and then, for once in his life, stopped to think. There was that old book Tecolo had liked, the one they'd found jammed in the old TV. Ludo hadn't liked it much, but he'd read it when there was nothing else to do. And he didn't remember much... but there was this secret entrance that was triggered by a book pulled from the shelf. So... he started knocking books off the shelf. Grab and toss. Grab and toss. Over and over, until –

"Ow! Darn paper, cutting me!" Ludo said, looking at the cause of the pain. It was a book he'd just dropped. An ordinary leather-bound book about the history of the Avarius family. And that would be it, except there was a bookmark. A bookmark that read " For Ludo " in messy handwriting. "What? For me?"

He opened the book and let the bookmark fall to the floor. It was an envelope, sealed with a picture of a tree and some mountains. He grabbed it and tore it open, and unfolded the letter.

Dear Ludo , it read. Ludo nodded. "Strong start, I especially like the 'Ludo' part. Hah, that's my name!" He frowned. "Wait, why am I narrating? It's not my job. I gotta keep reading."

If you're reading this, two things must have happened. Firstly, that you returned to Castle Avarius. Since non-Avariuses, except for myself, could not survive for more than a night here, it is unlikely anyone else is reading this. If you are not Ludo, please give this to Ludo Avarius. He's probably your older brother. Secondly, that something has compelled you to enter the library, and the library remains... intact. It is a beautiful section of a rather ugly castle, and I've found during my time here that it contains many books that otherwise would be totally lost to history. I'll ask your forgiveness if I borrowed a few to transcribe, translate, and donate to my library. I hope you don't use it as kindling.

I have been observing you for a long time, Ludo. You are a strange creature indeed. I can't say I expected to like you, I would be hard-pressed to like someone of your position and... personality. (At least High Queen Moon could realize her goals!) And I don't even like you now. But those... quirks proved useful, and may prove useful again.

"Wait..." Ludo said, frowning. "Is this..."

You are a privileged, arrogant brat who actively sabotages every attempt at success you encounter. You are so stupid dealing with you is an exercise in frustration. You make my sibling look like an elaborate, thoughtful planner. But beneath the privilege, the stupidity, and the terrible plans, you do have potential. You're brave and determined; given enough time and enough perspective you could accomplish anything. It would pay for you to listen to others a little, not to mention your obsession with conquering the multiverse. Why would that help anyone?

I suppose your upbringing is a factor. I cannot relate to having abusive parents, but I know the effects it can have on one's mind. So I assure you: you are not any better or worse than your fellow monsters. Let go of the desire to prove yourself important to anyone, especially those who do not want to know you. Until you do that, you will just be a footnote in someone else's story.

"Well, I don't like you! Ugh!" Ludo folded up the letter, and was about to stuff it back in the book, but thought better of it and forced himself to continue reading.

Which reminds me, you do have one highly important use: dealing with you is... practice. For... changing Mewni as we know it. If you can change, if you can improve, anyone can. You give me hope. If I can live through dealing with you for two months straight, I can deal with anything. If I can convert your henchmen to my side, if I can make you do what I want, then... she's right, I can change the world. And in the nearer future... anyone would work, I'm sure. But maybe I'll make sure it's you. At the very least, you're easy to manipulate.

"Ugh," Ludo said.

But that is beside the point. If you're reading this, you're back in Castle Avarius. And undoubtedly my actions have angered the ghosts of this castle. They will not try to hurt anyone while I am here, but if you're reading this, I am not here. So you must convince them to move on, by fixing the Avarius Beacon. Please don't use it to do anything stupid again.

1. Find at least one piece of the Avarius Beacon. I kept the pieces of it in a secret compartment I found in the library. Pull out the bright green book in the back corner of the library. The one opposite the ladder, in the Natural History section. A section of the wall will come out, and within it will be the Avarius Beacon.

Ludo did so. "Hah, I knew trick books happened in every castle! And Tecolo said it was 'way less common in reality.' I bet Butterfly Castle's got like five hundred of 'em." He pulled out the winged bell and staff of his old wand, in two pieces. "Okay, what now?"

2. This is the tricky part. Find some silk, ideally one produced by an insect or arachnid, like silkworms or spiders. Even tiny spiderwebs will work. While you're outside, grab some leaves.

Ludo scoffed. "'Tricky part?' 'Tiny spiderwebs?' I've got plenty of big spiderwebs, thank you very much. This is no tricky part." He climbed the ladder and grabbed a loose strand of silk from the house, plucking some leaves from a bush as he walked past.

3. Find a bowl. Pry out the crystal and charger from the wand. Open the bell and take out the alligator scales. Grind them up. Keep the bell, you'll need it. Then put them in a bowl with the silk, and light it on fire.

"What?!" Ludo gasped. "I don't have a bowl! I can use the lighter app on my compact for the fire bit, but a bowl?" He frowned. "Dennis would be mad if I went through everyone's belongings..." He scratched his chin. "Well, Dennis will be mad if I don't rescue him. So it's a loss either way. I'd like to rescue Dennis, so..." He dug through the various belongings his siblings had brought with them, and finally found a small, dented metal bowl. "Good enough." He put the magical items in the bowl, smashed them a bit with the rock, and put the silk in, staying outside. Even Ludo was smart enough not to start a fire in an enclosed space with no ventilation. He then lit it on fire using his compact.

A lot of smoke rose into the air, making Ludo cough. When he looked back at his pot, instead of silk and ground-up priceful artifacts, there was a large bug thing. A little grub with orange eyes and green and white stripes. "What?" He looked back at the letter.

4. The silk and magic should summon a silkbug. These creatures can remake any item with their silk, especially magic ones, if you give them a piece of it. So, give the silkbug the piece of the Avarius Beacon and the leaves. I must emphasize: give them the leaves. They're just leaves, and it's always nice to compensate the ones who will help you, and the silkbugs are unionized, so you will not be able to find another one if you do not compensate this one.

Ludo sighed. "Fine. Whatever. I'll just hand you some food. Here you go. Better work quickly." He decided to finish the letter while he waited.

It should restore the beacon to you, and then the ghosts will arrive.

"Wait, ghosts?" Ludo asked. "Oh no, I don't deal with ghosts!" He looked at the silkbug, who had finished the leaves and was working diligently on fixing the wand. "Stop it! Stop!" But when he tried to stop the silkworm, his hands slammed into a white forcefield. The bug had been paid in leaves, and it was not going to stop for anyone. "No!" He looked at the rest of the letter. "Please, Toffee, please tell me how to deal with the ghosts!"

I can tell you what I'd do at that point, but it wouldn't help. Everyone is convincing in different ways, and we are very different beings. A tip: manipulation always comes from the heart!

Signing off,

The Forces of Evil (Toffee)

"That's it?" Ludo said. He looked around. "That can't be it. Where's the rest of it? ...Wait, Toffee is the Forces of Evil? Wha-"

His voice quiet as mist began to form, as the silkbug finished its work and disappeared in a puff of gray sparks. The trees lurched around as a strong wind blew. Strong wind and mist do not normally work well together, but the ghosts made it work. But the lurching of the trees was not just the wind: they were growing, too, in strange and unnatural shapes.

"Oh dear," Ludo said. He closed his eyes, and took a deep breath. "Ghosts of Castle Avarius... bring me back my siblings!" He grabbed the wand-staff and slammed it into the ground. The mist cleared, and he saw two ghosts he recognized from the tales of his ancestors' "storied" past. Pemma and Sudo Avarius, two willowy bird-kappas who would have towered over Ludo even if they weren't floating.

"Pemma and Sudo Avarius," Ludo said. "I will –"

"Those are our names," Sudo said, in a croaky voice. "Narrator already told us. We don't need you repeating things."

"Forgive my husband," Pemma said, in a gentle Southern-esque accent. "He's fourth-wall challenged. Doctor said it was terminal, and, well, we're dead now."

"What." Ludo stated.

"Anyways, looks like you restored our wand. Great! Thought we had to burn the house down too, and unleash a plague upon you, and everything. Heck, I didn't think it was possible! But there's the Avarius Beacon, safe and sound. Now don't go breaking it again, and I'll give you your siblings back."

"I'm sorry, what?" Ludo asked. If she won't give me my siblings back until I've not broken it my whole life...

"Sorry, worded it weird. I'll give you everyone back, and you pinky swear to my husband and sign this document here –" she produced a document, "– and we'll be out of your hair. Until new Avariuses do something stupid with the wand. We'll stick around to be here when that happens."

Ludo nodded, but then hesitated. "That seems kind of... sad," he said.

"What?" Pemma asked. 

"Staying here, in this place forever, on the off chance someone breaks the wand. Don't you get sick of it?"

Sudo frowned. Pemma scratched her head. "We have to stay here. Yes, Lady Life is calling us, but we don't have to answer her call. We... we have to make sure the wand is safe. We have to. Crescenta trusted us with it..."

"That's the thing, though," Ludo said. "It's not up to you, and you have to be okay with that. Sometimes you can't dictate how life will go on when you're not there. And I guess you could try to be there, even if you run yourself ragged over it, but you still need to... to think of yourself eventually. And it doesn't matter what happens while you're not there, because you're not there. You can do other things. You don't have to focus on one goal so much that it drowns out your life. I've learned that. Maybe I was taking it a bit far, but... you can't control everyone else. Especially you." He gestured to Pemma and Sudo. "You've been stuck in this miserable hole for centuries. You shouldn't have to watch over us for all eternity."

Sudo frowned. "It... it won't be forever. Nothing lasts forever, except for the great all-powerful beings beyond time and space who crafted this grand Multiverse. Well... maybe not even them. Can infinity have an end?"

"Yes, nothing lasts forever! Including the Avarius Beacon, including your legacy, including your reign as awesome leaders of monsterkind! And you'll have to live with it! And it doesn't matter how long you spend looking after your legacy: eventually the legacy will be so broken you can't fix it. You won't be able to stop that forever. And you shouldn't have to try." Ludo took a deep breath. "If you're going to stay, stay for the things that make you happy, not just the thing you think is your purpose. Maybe... if you're going to stick around, you could help us out with rebuilding? Get to know your grandkids? I promise we're great people."

Sudo started bawling. Pemma looked away, patting his arm. "We... we'll think about it. Have your family back."

Ludo smiled. "Okay."

The mists cleared and the ghosts disappeared. Ludo bolted awake. "What was... what?"

He was in his hammock. Dennis was shaking him. "The weird floating things are gone, Ludo. No thanks to you."

"Dennis!" Ludo shouted, and grabbed his siblings' wing. "I was so afraid I'd lose you! Wait... was that...?" Something hard was digging at his stomach. He pulled the blankets off of him. There, in his hammock, was the Avarius Beacon, fully intact. And next to it was Toffee's note. "Is this... some kind of alternate universe thing? I'm sure it really happened."

"What really happened?" Dennis asked. He looked at the Avarius Beacon. "Where did you find that?"

Ludo wordlessly handed Dennis Toffee's note. Or, well, not wordlessly. "Ghosts. The weird telekinesis was caused by ghosts. You're welcome."

Chapter Text

"But, Mom!" Meteora found herself saying. "I can help! I'm friends with Rich Pigeon, I can help you!"

"You are not friends with King and Queen Pigeon," Eclipsa replied. "They are quite upset that they were recently forced to move all of their people to the Mountains of Incurable Anguish because of the new High Princess. They are even more upset that it took this long for their worries to be heard. I am afraid that your presence will not help me at all."

"But I want to do something! You and Star have been –"

"Star has been pushing you very hard, but I have to put my foot down on this one. Besides, you deserve an evening off. Let me handle this."

"You don't want me here?" Meteora nearly shouted. "It's my problem, let me fix it!"

"It's true, you made this problem. But you won't be the solution. I'm sorry, Meteora, but sometimes a person can't be the solution to the problems they make."

Meteora gasped, tears welling in her eye. Was she being unreasonable? It didn't matter. This was her chance, to prove that she was able to atone for her mistakes. 

"Meteora, I may not seem like it, but I have years of practice in diplomacy. You don't –"

"Yes, I do! Saint Olga –"

"Saint Olga was a hack and we all know it. All you know is how to set up tea parties and make problems for your mother! Now stay here!"

Eclipsa stormed off, immediately regretting her slip of tongue, but too angry to turn around and make up for it.

Meteora stood alone in her room, empty eyes staring at the spot she thought her mother had occupied. As Eclipsa's footsteps retreated, the full weight of her mother's words slammed into Meteora. She closed her door and locked it. Then she sat down on her bed, head in her hands. Is it true? Do I always make problems for everyone else? Saint Olga was a hack, but maybe she's right about one thing. I am worthless.

"Meteora!" a voice shouted.

"What?" Meteora gasped. "What's going on? Who's there?" Had she missed someone hiding in her room?

"It's me!" the voice said.

Meteora reached for the nearest heavy object, the broken helmet of a knight her mother had thought would look nice on her side table. "Well, 'me,' I am blind. I cannot see. And unless you identify yourself, I will smash this helmet in your face as best I can."

"Sorry, right. I'm Glossaryck." Glossaryck was indeed Glossaryck, unfortunately. He was also sporting a broken arm. The one who did that to him has all my respect and admiration. I would never hurt him, but... the one who did that very much deserved to do it.

"Good," Meteora said, setting the helmet on the bed, within arm's reach. "What do you want? You've barely paid attention to me. I can't even recognize your voice."

"Well, I was constantly being called away by the Magic High Commission. They're very upset with current affairs, and they need stuff like 'family bonding' and 'advice during these scary times.' And your mother. She's very busy, as a queen. She needs to know a lot of new spells. She's a good learner, too. With Star, boy was she difficult to teach. But your mother is an active listener."

Meteora snorted. "Yeah, my mom's great. Everybody loves her."

"Define 'everybody.'"

Meteora half-laughed at that. "Right. Everybody important loves her. But no one likes me."

"Hey, I like you. I couldn't wait to properly teach you. I've taught your mother all there is to teach, really."

"Except the spell to break my father's crystal," Meteora retorted.

"That's right. Because I wanted the one to do that to be you."

"What? But... I can't do magic. I don't even have the wand."

"You never needed the wand before, why would you need it now?"

"I don't have my eyes. I learned to do magic with my eyes. And I can't see what I'm doing with my magic. I need to be able to see to do magic."

"Meteora, Meteora... that isn't how it works. And you can do magic with your hands, too. Everyone does." Glossaryck tapped his chin. "I really do need to talk with your mother about getting you someone to teach you how to deal with blindness. Not something I have to worry about, of course. Even with my eyes closed, I can always See. You could have a perfectly normal body and still be disabled in my view. But... do you even have a guide pig-goat?"

Eesh… Glossaryck, I beg of you to shut up and spend all your days in some isolated deep sea trench. It would be far less painful than watching you try to be an ally.

"A what?" Meteora snapped, and then sighed. "Sorry..." She couldn't stop thinking about... "Mom's probably too busy cleaning up my messes to worry about me potentially making more."

"Yes, I do notice you keep circling back to that." Glossaryck tossed something in her lap. Meteora felt it, and realized it was her cane. "I said we're going to teach you how to use magic without your eyes, and I intend to fulfill that promise. Let's get going."

"Going... where?" Meteora asked, standing up. 

A strange vroop that Meteora recognized as a portal opening up, and then Glossaryck pushed her forward. "Come on, through this portal. Let's go, let's go."

"Okay, I'm going," Meteora sighed, and walked in. She walked into a place where the air was much thinner, and colder. Whistling sound like grains of sand blowing in the wind echoed strangely through it. Meteora couldn't even see the melted clocks everywhere, but just from the omnipresent atmosphere, she could tell she was in a place unlike any she'd encountered before. "Huh... where are we?"

"Welcome to the Plains of Time! Be careful, this place is... not made for squishy mortals like you."

"Right, of course," Meteora said. "Why are we in the Plains of Time?"

"Well, to complete our lesson, we need to time travel. And while that's very easy for me, I can't bring you to the Omniverse, because your frail little body and mind aren't made for... well, everything, everywhere, all at once. Just looking at it is mind-breaking, imagine going into it. So we need Father Time."

"Time travel?"

"Yes, Father Time should be around here. Look – or, well, don't. Can you hear anything? Like a wheel turning, for example?"

Meteora listened. "Nope."

"Ugh. I hate that thing Star did, where he can go wherever he wants now. You can never find him when you need him. Making him stay in one spot was my idea, you know. Boy did my mom hate it. But who cares about her, I think I'm going to have a word with my uncle after this."

Over my dead body.

Meteora frowned. "Uh... is there any other way to time travel?"

"Of course," Glossaryck groaned, head in hands. "But... I really don't want to see Reynaldo today." Deadbeat.

"Who?"

"Reynaldo. You know, the Bald Pate? He's… he's the ferryman of the River of Time. He's... ugh. He used to be on the Magic High Commission, before Rhina the Riddled cast a spell on him. He's a little more interesting now, but he is still a huge pain to deal with. Let's just go." Glossaryck pointed to a subway-like entrance. "This is awful. He'll talk to me, and I'll have to... Just... don't engage. Don't interact."

At the bottom of the stairs was basically a subway, but with a river of time instead of a subway track. "Okay, Meteora. We're outside of time here. Stay vigilant." Glossaryck pulled a ticket from a stand and sat down on a nice bench, guiding Meteora to sit down too. "This could take a while. Reynaldo is not... prompt." A pause. "You know, sometimes Rey –"

A blinding beam of light, brighter even than car headlights, blazed at them from downstream. "Oh, what the heck! I guess he's early, this one time I wasn't expecting him to be! Here he is!"

Reynaldo arrived on a fancy boat with many different squares inscribed on it. Squares within squares. It also had Reynaldo's face on the bow. The two design choices combined to make the boat look incredibly tacky.

"For passage through this timely sea, this question you must answer me. Who speaks in rhyme and wanders time, with none to call his family? No phone calls, cards, or –"

"OhKAY, thank you Reynaldo," Glossaryck said. "Please shut up. We... we're just in a hurry, and we need to get going. Come on, Meteora. Step wider, this is a boat."

"I've never been in a boat before!" Meteora gasped. She lifted her foot and tried to find the boat, but couldn't. Below her, she could tell, was a swirl of strange, mysterious time-liquid. She did not want to fall into that. "I can't do this!"

Glossaryck grabbed her foot and guided it into the boat. "Okay, grab my hand and –" He tugged her the rest of the way into the boat.

"Thank you," Meteora said. "I have no idea what Star was talking about. You're not bad at this teaching thing."

"Thank you, Meteora. I've had a lot of practice. Okay, Reynaldo, let's go! We're in a hurry!"

"What doth bring you to my land?" Reynaldo asked. "A passage through time, swift and grand?"

"Ah, excuse me, no more riddles! We don't have time. We need to go back."

"An inch, a pinch, the years unravel. How far doest thou wish to travel? The length of something short and flat, or –"

"Up-bup-bup! We just need to go to the Solarian Era."

"Ah, but such an event did twofold occur. Tell me which direction you seek to sojourn? The darkest past, the deepest future, we could journey into either."

"The one in the past. Upstream," Glossaryck said. "We are not going downstream, that would cause all sorts of problems."

"With haste, we must depart this place, and skim the flow of time and space. Away we go and briskly float. We ride, us three, upon a..." 

"Boat," Meteora said. Glossaryck said it too, a little behind Meteora.

The boat moved away from the dock and began sailing upstream. Part of why the River of Time is so dangerous, only a few select people and people riding on select objects can ride it upstream. Normal people, if they touched it, would be rapidly carried onward until they were snapped by the inevitable jaws of the end of time.

Few things can ride it upstream. But, something Meteora couldn't see, and Reynaldo and Glossaryck wouldn't acknowledge, was that not far downstream from the place where they got on, there was an entrance obscured by dark throbbing purple. The entrance itself was dark, with sheer absent nothingness behind it. And the poison was drip-drip-driping into the River of Time, where it would spread in branching veins like tree roots, holding its shape despite the current trying to disperse it.

Drip-drip-drip, and the poison spread through the River of Time. Not even the past was safe from this all-devouring plague. Soon every part of this multiverse would die, only a memory in the hearts of those who could remember.

And those were few and far between.

No one listened to Reynaldo's riddles. Even during the rare times he had company, no one wanted to hear the riddles he said. It wasn't easy coming up with them! Sure, Rhina had cursed him to only speak in riddles, but that was no worse than Glossaryck was all the time, and the riddles he started out with were terrible. He had to hone his craft, even if it was a craft forced on him. "What's dank and musky, like a foot, and falls apart when overcooked? In soups and stews this foulness lingers. If you must touch, don't smell your fingers."

"Meteora, I must apologize." Apologizing for your kid's sincere interest is one of the worst things you can do, Glossaryck. "Father Time's wheel would've been so much faster, and less... Reynaldo."

"It's fine, I –"

"Anyways, enough about Reynaldo. Try to lift this apple."

"What apple?"

An apple appeared in Meteora's hands. She could feel it.

"Oh. This apple."

"Yes, that apple. Try to feel strong emotions, and your magic will follow them."

Meteora stared down at the apple. Or tried to stare, everything was still black. She instead decided to throttle the apple for all it was worth. Her claws broke the apple's skin, and juice leaked out as she crushed it.

"Okay, maybe you're taking the wrong approach," Glossaryck said. "That apple needs to be undamaged, after all."

Reynaldo cleared his throat. "The time you seek, you did arrive. May you soon come out alive."

"Oh good, we're here," Glossaryck said. He guided Meteora towards the exit. "Come on, let's go."

"Goodbye... Dad," Reynaldo said. Glossaryck heard it, of course he did, but he didn't say anything.

He never did.

They climbed up the stairs, and inspected the area. It was Magic Bay. Around them were bizarre blue creatures with a hawk's head and wings, a unicorn's horn and hooves, and a scaly crocodile's back and tail. They all turned towards the two travelers, but seemed to find them uninteresting; returning to doing what they had been doing before.

A path of nondescript gray stepping-stones lead to the Magic Sanctuary, standing out of the water. It looked less like a fortress and more like an observatory. 

And coming towards them was a massive sailing ship.

Meteora saw none of that, of course, but she heard the crashing waves and tasted the salt in the air. And something was flapping in the wind. 

Glossaryck was not pleased. "Oh come on, Reynaldo! You brought us back too far! I do not want to do this now, with someone with me! I don't even have a baby rattle, all I have is – ugh. Meteora, close your eyes and cover your ears or something, I don't care. And I'll get you a new cane."

"You'll get me a new – hey!" Meteora gasped, as Glossaryck snatched her cane from her. "I need that to walk!"

"Just let me guide you now, okay? Okay!" Glossaryck said, before Meteora could say anything.

Taking someone's disability aid is not okay, friends. Glossaryck is a jerk. Meteora was completely justified in ignoring all of his orders and paying as close attention to the scene playing out in front of her as she could. 

The ship touched down on the shore. In it were people in wildly different styles of dress, unified only by their general unkemptness and their general... Mewmanity.

A woman with pink dots on her cheeks jumped down from the boat. "Glossaryck!" she shouted, pointing at him.

"Yes, Moe?" Glossaryck asked. 

"We've made it! Can't you see? I mean of course you can see it, you can see everything. But we've made it, and we're ready."

"Then all you need is this," Glossaryck said, and then stretched his claws to seize one of the chimera creatures guarding Magic Bay. He ripped at it, and it separated into three creatures: a crocodile, a hawk, and a unicorn. Glossaryck bent space to put the unicorn on the head of the staff, and it morphed into a fairly standard magic staff.

Then Glossaryck raised it to the sky, and suddenly Moe could see the sky splitting and fracturing out of focus. The sky... wasn't the sky. It was a branching network of golden orbs connected by streams of golden liquid like bolts of lightning, but far more permanent. Even Meteora could sense it– not with sight, but something deeper. And Glossaryck, who was huge and minuscule at the same time, reached and plucked one of the giant threads and spun it into the wand. The river stopped, an entire dimension's magic stifled and forced into one single conduit.

Then the vision was gone, and Glossaryck was placing the strange wand into Moe's hands. "You will make wonders with this," Glossaryck said.

"I do hope we do," Moe said. "I hope we do."

"Now, I have to go. So much to do, so little time. Come along, Meteora."

Meteora, now minus a cane, stumbled down the doors. She hadn't seen everything Moe had, couldn't see it, but something of what she had seen felt familiar. Familiar and somewhat nausea-inducing. She hadn't eaten, wanting to eat dinner with the pigeons. Ugh, she was not feeling great.

"Now that that's over with," Glossaryck sighed. He didn't look happy, either. "Come on, Meteora. Let's go find my weird son."

"Through darkness, slumbers, and toils, solemnly alone. No game of catch, no father, no home."

"Hey, Reynaldo!" 

"Father?" 

"Yeah, can we go a little forward in time now? Just a bit. Thanks."

"Thou makest haste like the wind, we shall arrive and –"

"Jeez, just go! Just go!" Glossaryck said, shooing Reynaldo to the other side of the boat.

They arrived in mountains, or at the very least rocky, unstable ground that was hard to navigate without a cane, and Glossaryck wasn't helping much. Meteora could feel the foggy midnight air around them. Leaves rustled in the breeze. Glossaryck ruined the mood by chuckling. "Here's a free extra lesson for you: don't have children!" A laugh. "Looks like we're here. Hold on, gotta change the language preferences." He winked out of existence and back in a brief millisecond.

Shnk . Someone was sharpening something. A hiss of breath, as if someone was in pain, and then a return to sharpening sounds.

"Hello, Forces of Evil," Glossaryck muttered.

"Miquiz, I know you're there," someone who was not Glossaryck said. It was not in Mewman, but Meteora could somehow understand it.

Meteora frowned. "They're not talking about you," Glossaryck whispered.

"I know you two are there too. If you have any sense left in your minds you'll let Miquiz and I have a private conversation."

"Nope!"

"I'll break your wings next."

"Still nope."

A sigh "Fine. Don't make any noise. Miquiz!"

A preteen's voice answered. "Darn it, I was hoping you'd forget about me."

"I don't forget. Why are you here?"

"I'm here to help! I've been training so hard!"

"Miquiz. You are still a child. You should be staying inside, where it's safe."

"But this is my fault! I didn't clear for bugs as well as I should have, and now... they're coming."

"Yes, and you cannot hope to defeat even one. Can you do magic?"

"Well, no..."

"Can you regrow from just a hand before they skewer you again?"

"No... but I have to do something!"

"What you can do is stay away. You're not helpful here. You would be a liability on the battlefield, not an asset."

Meteora growled under her breath. This conversation was achingly familiar.

"I'm not leaving! I brought them here, I have to be the one to send them back!"

A sigh. "Miquiz, that is not how this works. Just because you caused a problem does not mean you are qualified to be the solution! In this case, as many others, you will cause a problem and I will fix it. That's what I'm here for."

"Then I guess I won't do anything for the Rebellion! I'll leave now!"

"That would be preferable right now."

Miquiz was silent. 

Meteora stormed out of the bushes. "Stop it! Stop talking to him like that!"

Silence. Meteora hesitated.

Then Toffee, who we all knew was Toffee, spoke. "Are you..."

"Not yet," Glossaryck said, landing on Meteora's shoulder. "Time travel. You wouldn't understand."

"Really. How long will it be?"

"A good while yet," Glossaryck said. 

"Great. Now, how can I get you to leave?"

"You're not getting us to leave until you let Miquiz fight with you! He wants to help, there's safety in numbers! He can help!"

"No, he really can't," Toffee said, uninterested. "Go home, children. Both of you. You have no idea what you're talking about."

Meteora growled. "You break Glossaryck's bones, you treat your loyal follower like crap, this is not a good introduction! I don't care why you act like this, you're evil!"

"I... get that a lot," was the simple reply.

Meteora snarled. "Well, maybe there's a REASON for it!" Her hands, balled into fists, glowed. Her spell flooded the area with a wide green light before a narrow dark green beam found its target. Toffee. She reached forward, and grasped for their soul –

Whispers flooded her mind, slowly building into screams. Her heart was full, but the thousands of voices were clawing into it. She had her soul. She had taken thousands of others. But none of them had felt like this. They were reaching in, tearing, destroying their prison as she tried to lock them into it. Toffee's soul had already been claimed, by an infinitude of things beyond her ability to understand. She was fading... who was she? what was she trying to do? why –

"Meteora, stop!" Glossaryck said, shaking her with both arms. "Hey. Let it go. You can't bite off more than you can chew here. You've dipped down, lesson is over. Let's get out of here."

A rustling of cloth as Toffee brushed themself off. "Hmm... a lesson? My my, were you hoping she would teach me a lesson? Is that what brought you here? For a creature who claims not to be bothered by pain, you certainly seem to take any wounds to your pride quite seriously."

Glossaryck growled. "You broke my arm! I was just observing!"

"Yes, that's all you seem to do these days. Observe. But it is cute of you to act like I can hurt you. Now, Meteora, I have a lesson of my own to share with you: stay out of my mountains ."

A strange sound like thousands of voices whispering in unison, and Glossaryck was dragging her away, towards the exit to the River of Time. Whispers swirling around them grew louder and louder, until the ground turned from earth to stone, and they were in the River of Time once again. The voices abruptly stopped as the exit slammed closed behind them.

Neither pointed out that Toffee looked at their hands and sparked them dark green, to experiment. Seems that they had been taught an important lesson after all.

Glossaryck and Meteora gathered themselves in silence.

"Uh..." Glossaryck finally said. "There's... there's stairs here, leading down. I'll guide you."

Meteora nodded.

"So... think you could dip down again?"

Meteora smiled. She flicked her wrist, and an apple appeared in her palm. "Levitato!"

It floated.

"Good, that's very good. Now... what will you do now?"

"Well, that's up to you. Will you teach me how to destroy a crystal?"

"No, but I'll teach you how to seek an item and breathe underwater."

"Then we'll go home, live with Reynaldo's terrible riddles, you'll teach me the spells, we'll get Saint Olga's wand, and we'll wait for Mom to come back from the Pigeons, and then we will open my father's crystal."

"Excellent plan."

The earth shook as the six giants Solaria had sent to kill the Forces of Evil at all costs approached. The Forces of Evil waited, staring evenly in their direction. They could manage them. Solarian warriors were mostly protected by unbreakable armor – literally unbreakable, not even the Forces of Evil had found a way to break it – and strong magic, boosting their reflexes, speed, and stamina. Their flaming swords were like Solaria's own – the smallest cut from them canceled out all healing magic and would spread until it reduced the victim to ash. Most spells were useless on Solarians. But even the strongest armor had gaps, and what was the point of magic, when you had poison, your wits, and a very sharp, thin stick? It would be more difficult with the hospital behind them, a solid target to defend when their strategy relied on being too small and quick to catch, but they were far enough that the mists would hide it, and the potential capture of The Forces of Evil should provide a good enough prize to distract them from anything else. As long as they kept everyone out of their grasp, this would work.

And they would not move, would not yield. They would defend the hospital and all the innocents in it, even if it meant their death, or worse, imprisonment. They would prevail. And they had a new weapon.

And then Miquiz ran up. "Toffee! I need to –"

Toffee whirled to face him, stunned. "Miquiz, run! Run, now!"

The Solarian warriors came around the mountain. They were so large they blotted out the sun.

"Oh no."

On the ride home, Meteora had a thought. "Glossaryck... what happened to Miquiz? Did he ever get to fight?"

Unseen by Meteora, of course, Glossaryck shook his head. "At the last minute, he decided to return to the fight against the six Solarian warriors he'd accidentally led to the hospital in the Mountains of Incurable Anguish. Toffee was able to kill five of them, using various creative methods, but the sixth one escaped with Miquiz and brought him to Solaria. She starved him for months while performing various extremely unethical experiments on him to try to kill him. She failed, but... Eclipsa killed him."

"Mom?"

"Yes. She killed him with the darkest spell."

"Oh."

Chapter Text

"So.. you can do magic now?" Star asked, in full butterfly as she hovered over an ice floe Meteora had created. 

"Yup!" Meteora said, focusing. She would have had her eyes screwed shut, but. Well. "It's simple, really. I think I was overthinking it. Yeah, it's not what I'm used to... but it just means I'll have to work harder. Like... learning a new language."

"But..."

"What is it, Star?"

"No one can find out, Meteora. No one . People accept you because they think you can't destroy the kingdom again. They thought I beat you, and you're powerless now. Which I kinda did, and you were, but if people find out that it's not like that anymore? They'd be terrified."

Meteora wanted to protest. She wanted to make it a big deal, like she had her argument with her mother only a short few hours ago. But... "I... guess that does make sense. We'll... we'll have to take it slow. When Mom gives me the wand, then I'll start using magic in public."

"Yeah. But remember, whatever you do, don't paint the castle green and pink. I say from experience that that's not a good idea."

Meteora smiled. "That sounds like quite the story. But first, let's get that crystal wand. Glossaryck?"

"I'm in this scene too!" Glossaryck said, floating off to the side. Then he told Meteora what to do for a bubble that filtered oxygen from the water, and how to make her slapdash replacement cane point towards any object she sought.

And Meteora dove into the water. Star tapped two pairs of hands together. "Uh, what about the freezing temperatures at the bottom of the ocean? Or the pressure? Or, uh... dang it, Marcie hasn't shared enough fun facts with me."

"Don't worry about her. She knows how to handle it," Glossaryck said. "Also, the bubble was very well-designed. It was one of Crescenta's few good spells."

"Crescenta? Isn't she the one with all the creepy spells? That you instructed me to read very carefully because they start as something pretty useful but they have other horrible effects? Like the one where you tie your shoes but make everyone around you horribly itchy?"

"Among other things," Glossaryck said. "Yeah, Crescenta was a piece of work. So desperate to create as many new spells as possible and be the most important queen ever that she didn't stop to think about whether she was making useful spells, or being a good queen. And thus, she was remembered in history as mediocre and more than a little creepy. I think that's a lesson you could learn from, eh Star?"

More like a lesson you could learn from, Glossaryck.

Star sighed, and plopped herself down on the ice floe. "I dunno. Maybe I am trying too hard. But I just want this to work out. I don't want to have made a mistake."

Glossaryck nodded. He summoned a bubble. "But every once in a while, Crescenta... she did make a good spell, or a good decision." The bubble popped. "But... no one remembered that. All they ever remembered was the increasingly terrible efforts to prove herself."

"I guess when stacked up with all the bad, the good didn't really matter," Star said.

Glossaryck nodded, and looked across the ocean, perhaps regretfully, I don't know and I don't think he knew. "I guess it didn't."

A long silence, after that.

"When should we worry about Meteora?" Star eventually asked.

Glossaryck held up a hand. "Three, two, one..." he counted.

Meteora broke the surface. "I have it!" she shouted, waving a long blue wand with a branching crystal at the top. "Thank goodness it isn't damaged."

"Yeah, it's not," Glossaryck said, with barely a glance. "Be careful though. There's only one charge left in there. Don't fire it on accident. Now, let's go get your mom."

Eclipsa walked down a spiral staircase, holding a gift box in one hand and the Royal Magic Wand in the other, held aloft as a light source. While the tunnels under Mewni were temperamental, she knew they would behave today. They quickly and easily lead her to an old dock for an underground river. She got in a boat, funnily named "Queen's Folly," and started paddling.

Something large and dark swam under her boat. She smiled, contrary to what one might expect, and waited.

The water bubbled, and something huge rose out of the water. "Boo!"

Eclipsa laughed. "You know that doesn't scare me anymore."

"It did at first," Globgor said, pouting a little. Globgor was a sizeshifter, an enormous four-eyed omnivore that traditionally worked as the stamina in mixed septarian-sizeshifter packs. Funny how things change these days. Now septarians are the stamina, and sizeshifters are much more effective as muscle or even ambush hunters. Still, it was an interesting partnership. But I digress. He was big, humanoid despite the tail, and had dark stripes on his short, red fur.

"It did. But I've learned I'm far scarier than you could ever be."

"That is true." There was lingering emotion in Globgor's statement, but it soon passed. Globgor shrank into a form only slightly taller than Eclipsa, and landed in the boat. "Anyways, what took you so long? Did you get lost? The tunnels aren't kind to Mewman queens."

"No, the tunnels were fine. I just needed to find the perfect box for your gift." Eclipsa held it out. It was a long, narrow box with a bow on the top.

"Oh, wait! I have the perfect place. It's a secret!"

"A secret?" Eclipsa gasped. "Don't tell me... it's in a cave somewhere."

"Ha ha, Eclipsa."

"What? If you're playing up the scary monster angle... oh, nevermind. I can't wait to see it!" They kissed quickly.

Globgor smiled. "It's very nice. Hopefully it won't be... occupied. Ugh. I like your earrings, not very by the way."

"Thank you, they're new," Eclipsa said. "I love your outfit."

"Eh, it's not new. I used to wear it to official functions, you know, before..." He paused. "Well. I thought I'd wear something nice today. Even if it got wet."

"It's very nice," Eclipsa said. "You look positively dapper."

Globgor smiled at the compliment. "I should paddle for a while. Need to make sure we go to the right place."

Their boat left the tunnels into an above-ground stream, which soon bled into Mewni River. Globgor kept paddling, but he looked a little confused. "Wow. It's so peaceful out today."

"I know," Eclipsa replied, worrying that he was catching on.

"It's so peaceful, and yet... I'm... it's not, is it? Something feels... off about this whole thing."

"It's probably just the lack of Mewmans."

"Yes, Mewmans. Perhaps they're gone because I killed them all! I captured every single one of them and boiled them up in my cauldron in a cave in the woods to serve to the Forces of Evil! But they said no, because they were terribly allergic to the swamp water I used. All that hard work, wasted!"

Eclipsa snorted. "I'm pretty sure the Forces of Evil doesn't have any allergies, Globgor."

"What? You question my unending villainy? I am a monster! I totally eat babies!"

"Yes, and I help. I lure the babies in with my good Mewmanly looks, and then I pounce! My mother would be so disappointed in me!"

"Yes... and then we stare the Magic High Commission directly in the eyes and drink puréed babies while we do it," Globgor said. "Because we're eeevil!"

They looked at each other for about five seconds and then Eclipsa burst out laughing. Globgor broke soon afterwards, and they sat in their boat, going nowhere, laughing. Then Globgor gathered himself enough to row to shore, and they walked along the river to a grassy plain.

Eclipsa frowned. Something was weird. "Do you... hear that?"

Globgor looked at her. "Hear what?" He scratched one of his pointed ears. He heard... nothing. Not even the chirps of birds or the rustling of grass.

Eclipsa heard something. But it also was not birds chirping or grass rustling. "It sounds like... fighting. And shouting."

"That's odd. There's no one here," Globgor said. A pause. "You want to do the shoulder thing?"

"Yes, absolutely."

Globgor put Eclipsa on his shoulder and grew to enormous size. Eclipsa shot up, and then Globgor stopped growing, sending her catapulting into the air. "Wheee!" She got out her wand and opened the parasol, cushioning her fall. Globgor shrank down to her height, and they reached the ground together.

"Okay, my turn!" Globgor said.

"All right," Eclipsa said, holding her parasol aloft.

Globgor grabbed her hand. "One, two, three!" and he shrank to a much smaller sixe.

Eclipsa placed him on her shoulder and flew, across the Spiderbite woods and up a little creek that fed into Mewni River. They passed by a picturesque waterfall, and Eclipsa landed, pulling her guitar from the grass.

"How'd you know that was there?" Globgor asked.

"I have some surprises too," Eclipsa replied.

Globgor smiled. "I bet you do."

And then Eclipsa strummed her guitar, and the two sang together, an old song they had written and knew by heart. It was a song about love, and about sneaking 'round Mewni together, and about how one day, some day they'd be able to love freely, openly, together.

And then they came to a small clearing, with long grass and blooming wildflowers. And Globgor and Eclipsa lay together in the grass and watched the clouds.

"I don't see any shapes in the clouds," Eclipsa remarked. "But they're beautiful anyways."

"Yeah, beautiful..." Globgor said. "Too bad they're not real."

"...how long have you known?" Eclipsa asked.

"Well... I mean, this place is usually crawling with Mewmans. Despite our joking, I didn't do anything to keep them away, so..." A sigh. Then: "Also there's that."

He pointed at a figure floating at the edge of the clearing. A muscular whale, with a banana on its head. Heroic fanfare sounded.

Eclipsa looked. "What... is that?"

"That's Bananahat Musclewhale," Globgor said gravely.

"I'm afraid I don't know who that is," Eclipsa said.

"Bananahat Musclewhale was the last crusader against the evil tyranny of Lord Rygax, wizard overlord of the kingdom."

A sinister looking wizard in a tower appeared from the now misty woods. The wizard laughed, and lightning struck.

"Lord Rygax?" Eclipsa asked, prompting Globgor to go on.

"Yeah, but listen. Bananahat Musclewhale was unprepared for the enchanted shaddlings that Rygax mind-controlled to do his bidding. And Bananahat fell to their awesome powers, leaving Lord Rygax to run the kingdom into darkness... forever."

"I missed this part of Mewni history."

"This isn't Mewni history, it's from my mind! I created Bananahat when I was a little boy."

"Oh. Makes sense."

Globgor paused. "Wait... are we in my mind? Right now?"

"...yes," Eclipsa said.

"Ohhhh!" A pause. "That's creepy, boo."

"I thought you'd be happy to see me," Eclipsa said.

"Well, I am! But I don't want to be in my mind. I mean, where's my body?"

"Your body is still trapped inside one of Rhombulus's crystals."

Events caught up to Globgor. That did track. "Bummer. Then where are you?"

"Well... I'm free now, basically."

"So how'd you get in here?"

"I used a spell."

"And... Meteora? Is she free?"

"Yes," Eclipsa said, not knowing. "She's a beautiful young girl with my hair and your fangs! And... she's the reason I'm here."

"Oh?" Globgor asked.

Eclipsa got out of the box, from before. She opened it, revealing a blue wand with a branching crystal at the end. "Her captors had been crystalizing and re-crystalizing her with this. It's a wand, infused with the power of Rhombulus's crystals. There's one charge left, and I'll use it to free you."

Globgor smiled. "And... everything else? What happened to Mewni while I was gone? How long have I been out?"

"There'll be time for all that once you’re free," Eclipsa said. She lifted the wand, charged it, and woke up in the real world with it in her hands. She saw nothing else as she activated the wand, heard nothing as she used it to free her lover –

"ECLIPSA, WAIT!"

It was too late. Globgor's crystal disappeared. Eclipsa floated down; she'd had to fly up to maintain the eye contact required to perform the mind spell. She landed on the ground at the same time Globgor did.

He looked up at her, and why did he look so upset? No, he wasn't looking at her. He was looking past her. Eclipsa turned around to see a scene of devastation. Star was held back by a mountain of Hekapoo clones, Marcie was trapped falling through Omnitraxus's portals, and Meteora... Meteora was in a crystal. "No," she gasped. "No, Meteora! What... why?"

"Well, uh..." Rhombulus started. He was helping Hekapoo with holding Star back.

"We heard that your spawn learned how to do magic again," Hekapoo said, as Star burst free of the clones. She quickly sent Star to Britta's Tacos and set an embargo on Earth. "So we did our jobs and neutralized the threat to Mewni."

"But Meteora isn't a threat! She's your princess!" Eclipsa gasped.

"And you were our queen," Hekapoo said. "We deal with Mewni as a whole. It doesn't matter who's in charge, if they're going to destroy Mewni, we crystalize them first."

"Meteora was no threat to you!"

"Meteora destroyed the kingdom once, she can do it again!" Hekapoo retorted, loudly. "We won't let her do it again."

"Star or myself or anyone with the wand could destroy the kingdom five times over!" Eclipsa yelled. "Have you locked the wand away?"

"No. Because you haven't. And you won't." Hekapoo smirked. Rhombulus looked mildly ill. Omnitraxus hadn't manifested physically since ze put Marcie in zir portals.

"You don't know that," Eclipsa said. She raised her wand and it glowed with her power. Her cheekmarks and eyes glowed.

"Eclipsa, wait!" Globgor shouted. He put a hand on her non-wand hand. "This is horrible. They're being horrible. But we can't destroy the kingdom to prove a point."

Eclipsa sighed. "You're right... but I'm not going to leave this here. You falsely imprisoned the crown high princess of Mewni. You imprisoned my daughter. I will make your life a living hell for this."

Hekapoo laughed. "You can't do anything. Try as you might, you need us! And hey. It's a fair trade. One mild-mannered husband for your criminal daughter. I'd set Globgor free a million times if it meant that stain on Mewni was locked away."

Globgor roared and grew massive. He grabbed Hekapoo. It was easy, he had a very clear shot. He lifted her high and tightened his grip.

"Let go!" Hekapoo shouted, wiggling and twisting and trying to get her claws out of his grip so she could slash him.

"Do you have any idea how that feels?" Globgor said. "The knowledge that you have hurt someone you love, through no fault of your own?" Globgor set her down, and shrank back to normal size, head in his hands. "I hope you never feel that pain, for your sake. Now... bring Eclipsa's butterfly friend back. And... whoever that is," he said, gesturing the infinitely falling Marcie. "They're Mewmans. Surely you can make an exception for them."

Hekapoo opened her mouth to say something, but Omnitraxus had already released Marcie, and Rhombulus shook his head. "...just do it, Heka."

Hekapoo nodded, and lifted the embargo on Earth. Star slammed back into Mewni, only to see everyone leaving.

No one left satisfied.

Chapter Text

Kelly was having a great day, until Jorby's mother noted that she had a group counseling session later that day. Then her mood soured immediately. A group counseling session? Who would she have to fight? She was out of practice, would they be strong? Jorby was coming with her, would she have to fight him, or could they fight together? Would she survive?

She didn't voice these worries out loud. Showing weakness would only demoralize Jorby, who had to survive this. Even if he would fight her.

She didn't say no, either. She accepted it. Jorby's family had been so nice to her, and they hadn't even fought her yet. This would be an excellent way to prove her worth on the battlefield.

They went to Interdimensional Group Therapy, in the Interdimensional Hospital, which was free and funded by Big Magic. No one really knew what Big Magic was. Or, well, some people knew, but they weren't telling. But everyone agreed that they saved a lot of people from painful, preventable deaths, all of the time. Which made a lot of people angry, and they often tried to hex Big Magic. But since no one actually knew what Big Magic was, none of the hexes worked.

Because ages among different species are weird, the group therapy was for creatures that were finished or really close to being mature for their species, and not yet entering elderhood. So basically, 'adults' and 'young adults.'

The group was composed of a small bird man who we recognize as Ludo, a brown-skinned human who we recognize as Bridget, and two people we don't recognize, a blob guy named Stampy and a person named Stromatch. And Jorby and Kelly, of course. The counsellor was a strange cosmic creature named Silte-La. She was weird. A weirdo. She didn't fit in. She didn't want to fit in. Have you ever seen her without that stupid earring on? That's weird.

Kelly looked at the assembled people in front of her. They were all in chairs. How strange, were they props? Should she grab a chair? No. Sure, it was five, possibly six, on one, but the little bird man looked weak. She could take him out first, and then...

She swallowed her fear of what all these people could do to her, and punched Ludo in the gut.

Everyone stared. Ludo doubled over and fell to the floor. Stampy scooted away in his chair.

"Yeah, we got lots of issues to work through," Silte-La muttered, tapping her clipboard. "Is anyone uncomfortable with unprovoked physical violence?" she asked, louder. "If you are, please don't hesitate to pull me aside and voice your concerns."

Rhombulus was patrolling the castle when he came across someone he definitely didn't expect. In front of him was Princess Meteora, curled into a corner, crying. It was weird, she only had one tear duct left, but she was still really crying.

He did not know what to do. Meteora was a monster, she'd destroyed the kingdom, she was... she was awful. But here... she looked exactly like what she was. A crying, scared child. Rhombulus's gut told him she was evil. But he'd learned not to trust his gut.

"Uh... you okay there?" Rhombulus asked. His snake hands looked at him like he was nuts. He ignored them. "Uh... Your Highness?" Or not. Hekapoo and Omni never called her by her royal title. But he couldn't stop himself.

Meteora’s head jerked up . "Oh... I thought no one came here," she said, trying to compose herself.

"Well, uh..." Rhombulus started. "Uh, I'm supposed to patrol the grounds. We're... uh, we're still short on guards. Are you... are you okay?"

"I should be," Meteora said. She didn't seem okay, snot was coming out of her nose. It was kind of gross, face goo was really gross in general, but she was clearly crying. Crying! Why was she crying?"

He had no idea what to do.

"Uh... what do you mean by that?" he finally asked. "Why should you be... okay?"

"I should be okay! I should be! Everything's going so well! The other royalty my age love me! They were so nice to me... but I don't... I don't deserve it."

Rhombulus didn't frown, but if he had a mouth, he would have. She... she knows she doesn't deserve any of what's been given to her? She knows she doesn't deserve kindness? Does that... does that mean she does deserve it?

Oh, why did the world have to be so complicated? It was easier when his gut told him what to do and he did it. He wished he could go back to that. He couldn't, though. He never would be able to. 

"Uh... maybe they didn't... maybe you... I don't know," Rhombulus looked around. He took a nonexistent breath. "Maybe you were confused. You did spend a lot of time in crystal. Who knows what that could do to your brain. I certainly don't. Haha."

"I guess. Saint Olga brought me to a surgeon's once, I think it was for an infection. They gave me something. I remember afterwards, I did the silliest things, but I thought I was being perfectly logical. It made sense to hug Saint Olga constantly and cry when she wasn't in my sight. It was only later when I could figure out how silly I was. And Saint Olga was so furious and disappointed with me. She nearly froze me again because of it. She... she sent me to the solitary conformment chamber, because of something I did when I was sick. A lady must always stay composed, I guess."

"That sounds..." Rhombulus realized. Oh . "My dad... he still treats me like... like a child. He sends me to the time-out corner whenever I argue with him. And... one time, I messed up, and he gave me these hands. They're great company, I guess, but they're... I can't pick things up very well anymore, and I can't be alone anymore."

"Hey. Rude," the right hand said.

"I just want some me time, for once! It's nothing personal!" Rhombulus replied. 

"Hmph," the two arms said. 

Meteora connected the dots. "Oh. So you're Rhombulus."

"Yeah. Is that... is that bad? Should I leave?"

"Yes? No. No, it's okay... I guess I need someone to talk to. Sorry for draining your soul. You know, before."

"Yeah," Rhombulus said, plopping down a safe distance away, but still close to her. "I accept your apology. Sorry my magic was used to freeze you constantly."

“I accept your apology too.”

A pause. 

"I always intended to give the souls back, you know."

"What?" Rhombulus asked.

"Once I ruled Mewni, once I had everything. I would have brought all the souls back. Slowly of course, to ensure my reign was solid, but... I would have given them back eventually."

"Really?" Rhombulus asked. "Even the Magic High Commission?"

"Yes? Maybe. I don't know. I'd try, I guess. I would try to stop you from hurting me, and... I don't know."

"Huh," Rhombulus said. "Trapping people in stasis forever... I guess it's good to let people out of that."

"I know. But I still hurt people," Meteora said. "I was so stupid. I shouldn't have done any of it."

"Well, I think... if you were really not going to permanently hurt people... I know the rest of the commission doesn't like you, but... you're pretty alright, Meteora."

"Thanks," Meteora said, half-smiling. Even a half smile lit of the dreary hallway. "I don't deserve that... but thank you. I'll try to be the best Crown Princess I can be."

Rhombulus stared at the former high princess, trapped in crystal in the monster temple. This wasn't right. 

But he'd done it anyway. Hekapoo and Glossaryck – he'd never expected Glossaryck to turn against Eclipsa, but he had been strange, almost desperate lately – they had agreed, and he did their dirty work, like always.

It didn't feel right, or honorable. His gut was rubbish, he had learned that a long time ago, and while before that long time ago he would have listened to it tell him that it felt right to take care of such an obvious threat to the kingdom, his mind told him that it really wasn't. His heart told him that taking a kid – a messed up one, sure, but still a kid – away from her family the moment before she got to meet her father for the first time was awful. A kid who had made a huge mistake, but who... made a mistake like his own. 

Meteora had destroyed the kingdom. She had drained the souls of everyone she could catch. She was always planning to give them back.

Rhombulus had destroyed a different kingdom. He had frozen countless criminals – people – in crystal. He had never planned to free them. But...

It was easy, now that Lekmet was gone, to redecorate. To hide just how many people he'd been freeing. He'd analyzed his prisoner's crimes, and listed them down as being based on his gut, his feelings, or actually fact-based reasoning. He had freed the ones he thought he'd messed up on, just their heads, and talked to them. Just... talked to them, like he had with Star. They seemed to be okay people, too. He asked them about their crimes, with no presumption of guilt, and their home lives, and their families, and watched them for a while. Then he let them go, more often than not. Sent them back to their home dimensions, if those still existed and they still wanted to be there. So many had been there for ages, and so many didn't want to see how much their homes had changed. Some wanted to start fresh. He had a limited understanding of that concept, but he supposed he could learn. Star would die eventually, and so would Meteora, and he'd wanted to get to know some more mortals. Maybe even Eclipsa.

So. That was why he found himself outside Hekapoo's forge. He would talk to his sister, he just had to find the courage to say the things that had to be said. He was rehearsing what he was going to say when he heard his sister's voice coming from the forge.

"Yeah, but... going against the queen of Mewni. I don't like her, hate her in fact, and her husband is worse, but... they'll have another kid eventually. Maybe we can get that one to marry a proper Mewman. We can fix this, we have time. It just doesn't feel right to turn against the crown. At least this way we can work with an actual royal."

The other voice was indistinct, almost deliberately so, like a government-mandated static over a radio broadcast. Rhombulus listened hard and caught something like "eventually." That didn't help much.

"I know, you keep saying that, but... maybe it'll be you they turn against. And maybe they'll be right. We all know what... what happened. They'll hate to learn that. I hate to know it. And you'll live with it, right? You love them. You'd hate to lock them up again, like you hated when Rhombulus locked up her brat. You don't even think she did anything wrong!"

More indistinct chatter. "No, no, they wouldn't! She wouldn't! She's not that evil! She wouldn't destroy everything we've worked for!"

More indistinct chatter. Rhombulus got the feeling he knew what was being said.

Hekapoo started to cry. He had never heard his sister cry. He turned away. He'd probably just make things worse.

Kelly felt like she had started off this... whatever it was on the wrong foot. She coughed. "Uh, I feel like I misunderstood something. Are we... not supposed to fight each other in group therapy?"

A cough, from Stampy.

"No, not really," Silte-La said. "You're a Puffle, right?"

"Yeah, she is," Jorby said, halfway between relieved and embarrassed.

"Yes, uh, I am, but... I'm trying to work through it," Kelly said, full of nerves.

"Oh, it's fine! Feel free to express your culture in any way you like. You just can't make others participate. So if you want to fight, you gotta fight yourself." Silte-La looked her up and down. "I'm sure you can take you."

"...thanks?" Kelly said.

"But I do think you owe Ludo an apology."

"Right. Sorry about that, Ludo."

Ludo groaned, standing up and sitting in a chair. "No problem... I've had worse."

Silte-La half-smiled. "Yes, you have," she said quietly.

"So... what do we do in group therapy, if not fighting?"

"Oh we talk about our problems and work together to find a solution. But if that solution involves a fight, as long as it only involves yourself and slash or fellow consenting adults, go ahead!"

"Fight yourself! Fight yourself! Fight yourself!" Stromatch whisper-shouted.

"Hey, she'll only fight herself if she wants to," Silte-La said. "We shouldn't pressure her to do anything."

Kelly shook her head. "I don't want to fight myself. Let's do that... working through problems… thing."

"Okay, sure. For our first day, let's do introductions!" Silte-La said. She spun around in a circle and finally pointed at Bridget. "How about you go first? Tell us your name, your pronouns, your species, your interests, where you're from, and what you hope to gain from the group."

"I'm Bridget. She/they," Bridget said. "I'm a human. I like robotics and fashion. I'm here because my mom thought it would be a good idea."

I like this girl, Kelly decided.

"Bridget," Silte-La said, testing out the word like she didn't already know it. "Hello, Bridget. Can you tell us where you're from?"

Bridget glanced around the room. "Depends. Does anyone here, you know," she put her hands together and made a flapping motion.

"Oh, right," Silte-La said, wincing. "Kelly, Ludo, and you. And me, but not properly."

Kelly glanced at Ludo. She had never seen him before in her life.

"Okay," Bridget said. "I'm from Earth. That's it."

"Alright," Silte-La said. "Let's go clockwise from here. Ludo, care to introduce yourself?"

"Um, excuse me, I was going to say my name!"

"Yes, and I'd like you to say it now!"

"But you told them my name! Now they know it already! You spoiled it!"

A peculiar expression crossed Silte-La's face. "...you're right, I'm so sorry. Everyone, please forget this little bird man's name. He shall now introduce himself."

"Fine, whatever," Ludo muttered. "I'm Ludo. Uh, he/him. I like... uh..." He stopped and thought. What did he like? "...knitting?"

"Awesome! I'll send you some patterns!" Silte-La said.

"Oh, uh, I'm... self-taught. And not very good at it. I guess you can send me some, though. Uh... what were the other things?"

"Your species, where you're from, and what you hope to gain by coming here."

"I'm a... bird person. I'm from Mewni. I want to find myself, and Dennis says therapy is the best way to do it."

"What does finding yourself involve?"

"Oh, uh... if I knew, I would have found myself already," Ludo decided.

"Alright, sounds reasonable," Silte-La said, and moved on.

Stampy, Kelly, Stromatch, and Jorby all introduced themselves without incident. 

"Alright, everyone, time for the real big part," Silte-La's eyes darkened. "Check in. This is the time where you tell us all your problems, and we work together to find a solution, or help you vent. It works best if you tell us everything. Everything. Every last detail. Don't hold back."

Kelly gulped. She wasn't sure, after all, that she was relieved they weren't fighting.

Rhombulus went to Omnitraxus next. Omni was always wise, and gave good advice. Rhombulus never had a head for subtlety, but he had the feeling Omni was more... rebellious than ze let on. Ze was the closest to the inner workings of the cosmos, closest to... her. That specter who loomed over all the High Commission who knew of her existence. Especially Glossaryck. And especially Omni.

Omni, if it counted for anything, had always advocated for peace with the monsters. Maybe that would help.

But as he got to the Plains of Time, he found that Omni was already occupied, talking to an indistinct figure that Rhombulus couldn't recognize.

"I can't talk now! I have to stop this infernal corruption from spreading!" ze was saying. "When will be the right time to tell the rest of the commission? When it's destroyed the entire multiverse? At the very least we should tell Eclipsa!"

Static.

"What do you mean she already knows? Why hasn't she done anything?"

More static.

Omnitraxus swore, something Rhombulus had never heard zem do before. Then ze sighed. "That, more than anything, proves she is incompetent as queen. What's the backup plan?"

Chatter.

"Well... if you promise to teach her everything, and if you really think she'll work best... fine. No one is going to like this, but if it saves the multiverse... very well."

More static.

"I'd like to think there's other people who would set aside their scruples and actually work to save the entire multiverse if that was what was at stake. I'd like to think I'm not the only one."

The staticky figure dissipated, and Omnitraxus retreated into zir galaxy form.

Rhombulus, who still wanted to talk to Omni, shouted zir name, in hopes of talking to them. But it seemed Omnitraxus didn't want to talk. All was quiet, save for some distant whoops from Father Time.

The group went in the same order as they'd introduced themselves. Bridget wasn't really interested in painting the way her mother was, and wanted a good way to tell her. Ludo was trying to put his past behind him, but a friend wanted him to keep trying at something he'd thought he'd given up a long time ago. Stromatch was considering changing their gender legally but wasn't sure how to go about it. Stampy was worried he was worried too much.

And then it was Jorby's turn. He glanced at Kelly. "I'm worried about Kelly," he finally said.

Oh no, Kelly thought. He's going to tell them everything. He won't leave any detail out. 

"I'm glad that you made an exception to group members not knowing each other outside of group to let her in," Jorby said. "But I'm worried my being here won't be helpful to her. She tries so hard to impress us. It's really... I hope someday she'll realize that she doesn't need to. She's fine where she is. And she definitely doesn't need to fight us. She's beaten me plenty of times; I don't need to find out she's a great fighter. And my mom can't even fight. She probably doesn't even know one end of a sword from the other."

Kelly blinked. "I – but I need to earn my place in your house! I'm costing you money, I'm living in your guest bedroom, I'm –"

"We don't care about any of that, we care about you," Jorby said. "We have plenty of money, we don't ever use the guest room, and we don't need you to earn your place. That's not an issue."

"But I need to – I need to –" To prove I'm worthy of your friendship, she did not say, and definitely not because so many other Puffles didn't get a great friend like you.

"You don't need to do anything," Jorby said. "All you need to do is let us take care of you."

Kelly broke down crying, and Jorby got up and walked up to her. She buried her face in his fur. "It's not fair, it's not fair," she whispered.

"Aww," muttered Silte-La. She hadn't even had to do anything. "I think you two had an excellent talk. I didn't even have to say anything. You should become a therapist, Jorby."

"Me? Never," Jorby said, smiling.

Kelly mumbled something like: "youdbegoodatthefightingpartstoo."

Rhombulus stood in his crystalline dimension and waited. If the pattern held, he would be visited by this mysterious staticky being next. 

He had a feeling he knew who it was.

He had a feeling he knew what he'd say.

Chapter Text

Yvgeny had a dilemma. See, he was in Septarsis. With all the Septarians. With one Septarian in particular. One Septarian who had immediately made friends with what seemed like every single child among the refugees including his children, who seemed constantly busy with something but always had time to talk, who, Yvgeny was slowly realizing, was not quite what the persona they had put up around Yvgeny previously would suggest.

Who, he was also beginning to realize, he had only ever interacted with around Ludo. Someone they'd been very interested in holding the "tough dangerous planner" persona around.

And he had no idea what, if anything, to do about it.

It started, as many things do, with Shinjai. They had just arrived in Septarsis, and Shinjai had disappeared somewhere with the Forces of Evil. Yvgeny had been so busy wrangling all twelve of his children that he hadn't noticed which train they had taken. Well, she had his compact number. She'd know how to find him.

He used the bizarre train system to travel to his baby's new neighborhood in Septarsis. It was near what appeared to be a library, it at least contained a lot of books, where maybe someone could teach the babies to read. He himself was pretty bad at it. Hopefully a librarian could teach his children to read circles around him.

Then the government-appointed translator arrived. They were a slim, polite sizeshifter, four eyes and all. They said their hellos and welcomes, introduced themself as Raibona and then showed them around. Septarsis was a big city, they explained, but this neighborhood had every amenity that they would need. There was a grocery store, a clothes store, a general store, a few restaurants, schools, plenty of food trees, a hospital – the works. All within walking distance. And "store" wasn't quite what they were, that implied selling. All these "stores" would give them what they needed for free. A gift, Raibona explained.

"Wow, that is amazing," Katrina said. "You don't even have to take a train?"

"We won't need to take the train?" Leo said sadly.

"No, though you used to for the restaurants," the translator said. "Then, well... we did a bit of redecorating."

Everyone glanced at each other. They all knew what the translator was talking about.

"Anyways, to call other houses, use the calling stones in your house. They'll probably be around the kitchen, and they're shaped like eyes. Normal mirrors don't work here; we have to use something Hekapoo won't track. But these stones can find anyone in the multiverse. Please use them sparingly, as we don't have much power here. Set them in the charging bowl to charge them, it will be labeled in Septarian and Mewman. If it's an emergency, the nearest emergency worker is Iina of the Tódich'ii'nii clan, call her and she'll send someone your way. Hospitals are free, social work is free, if you have problems that can be solved by hitting them, the Forces of Evil will come by. I know they're a big deal to outsiders, but they really aren't more than muscle and battle strategies here, so don't act too reverent."

Yvgeny frowned. They weren't a big deal in their home city? Why wouldn't they be? They were the most powerful person in the city. Or... did they not want to be a big deal here? Toffee was never a fan of the spotlight; they preferred to let others assume they had done everything on their own.

Raibona showed them all to their houses – almost all large apartments above stores – in a very peculiar manner. No one had an assigned house, instead they would show a house and explain the amenities it contained, and how to renovate it with magic "stoneshapers" if they were unsatisfied. And they would just... pick a house. If two people wanted the same house, they faced off in a battle of... rock paper scissors.

Yvgeny got a house that had enough bedrooms to give all twelve of his children half of a room. It was incredible. Their rooms were small, and some had to be accessed via stairs, but the babies were still small, and they all had their legs, and having a door and half an entire room was the coolest thing in the world to all of them.

They were very cute. But Yvgeny was hesitant. This place was nice. Really nice. Almost... too nice. There had to be some kind of dark secret here. Toffee was... well. They seemed to not be in charge here, but...

He kept that concern in the back of his mind when Shinjai finally knocked on the door. She seemed in high spirits, said that Toffee had shown her the center of the city, and the stone tree that was sprouting there. "It's beautiful. You should come over and see it."

"I have babies to look after," he replied. "Parenting them is a full time job."

"Yes, but some nights have to be free! I can babysit."

"You must live in distant part of very big city. Why should you have to take train to visit?"

"I live right near you." She gave the address, and Yvgeny realized that yes, she did live nearby. "I specifically asked to be close to you guys. Wouldn't want to leave your kids without a babysitter, right?"

Yvgeny nodded. Okay. So Toffee wasn't separating friends. That was a good thing, right? Or not? Did they have hooks in Shinjai, and wanted to draw Yvgeny closer through her? "And Toffee allowed this?"

"Toffee... had nothing to do with it," Shinjai said, confused. "I asked Niyol, one of the housing directors. Toffee just wanted to know my relationship to Star, and if it would cause any trouble. They seemed fine with what I had to say, and then sent me and my parents on our way. Niyol got us situated. Though, they might come by later and ask you about Star, too. I said you knew her too. I hope that's okay."

Yvgeny did his best to hide his fear at that. Yes, the Forces of Evil was the Forces of Evil, who monster parents in hushed whispers told their children would one day free them all. Monsterkind's defender. Whose secret home in the mountains was a refuse every monster could fall back on. 

But they were also Toffee. Manipulative, clever, and dangerous. Maybe if he followed them instead of Ludo, he would have different opinions on them, but they were still not someone he wanted to know. Best to watch them from a distance, now that they had similar goals. He could trust them to have monsterkind's best interest at heart, but not the interest of his family, in specific. He was sure, though not in those exact words, that if it came to it, Toffee would pull the lever in that trolley problem.

But Shinjai had one last thing to tell him: her parents were hosting a potluck, to celebrate everyone's arrival, in a week and a half. Everyone in the neighborhood was invited. They'd gotten Raibona, the translator, to come too. It would be a good excuse to meet everyone in the community.

Yvgeny accepted. It would be good to form bonds here. Make friends. See if anyone else thought there had to be something weird here.

Shinjai left soon after, to finish helping her mom get all of her collection back from Toffee's warehouse. Yvgeny got out a book of fairy tales that was worn and tattered. Tomorrow he'd go to the library and get some new fairy tales to read to his kids. Hopefully they'd like whatever strange Septarian tales he'd find.

The next day, he learned that in Septarsis, he was almost completely illiterate and intelligible. "Almost" because he knew a few phrases in the Rukan dialect of Frogian. His parents had never taught him even if they couldn't stop him from learning their accent, but they had held conversations he wasn't supposed to listen to in Frogian, and that was enough for him to pick up scattered words and phrases.

But while more people of Septarsis knew Frogian than knew Mewman, neither language was the most commonly used. That would be Septarian, of course, the language that was banned in all forms in Mewni. One whose alphabet Yvgeny had never even seen before now. Raibona helped, but his main goal had been to find books he could read to his children. It wouldn't be the same if Raibona read them to sleep.

"Well, I suppose if that's your concern, you can learn Septarian," Raibona said. "I have classes for newcomers like you. All are welcome."

Yvgeny was suspicious, but accepted her flyer and said he'd think about it.

And the grocery store and even the fruit trees around the area were worse. There was all kinds of food he couldn't recognize on sight, and all the labels were in Septarian. He finally gave up and went to Raibona, which just made his suspicions about this place worse. Was he doomed to rely on this person he didn't know for his entire time in Septarsis? What was he going to do?

He should take those classes. He'd need them. 

Raibona showed him around the grocery store, helping him get everything and check out. They were nice. That was suspicious. 

Still, he needed to eat, and his babies needed to eat, and he needed to bring a wonderful dish to the potluck.

He thought he'd have to wait for the potluck to talk to Shinjai's parents, but they soon invited him over to drink adult-appropriate drinks and have a talk about how they were settling in, along with a few old friends.

"Did you see the grocery store? They even have spoiled milk!" Boo Fly shouted excitedly. "And I've never seen so much food in my life!"

"Raibona says they get food from all over the place. They engineered a lot of their plants to grow in low light levels. And sunlight plants are grown across the mountains, and they're friends with the barkeepers at the Tavern Beyond the Multiverse. Apparently the only thing those guys can't rustle up is a consistent schedule," Tiana said. "It's amazing!"

"The Tavern Beyond the Multiverse?" Boo Fly asked. "Where's that, and how rotted is their meat? You have to get it in a happy medium, you know."

"Oh, it's –"

"I'm just worried that it all... everyone is way too nice here!" Yvgeny said. "People is way too nice, food is way too nice, houses, everything! Entire city way too nice! And so isolated, so far away from any other contact, and with Toffee as... important person, there has to be awful secret here somewhere."

"They're not totally isolated," Tiana said. "The pigeons send messages throughout the Mountains and Mewni. And the calling stones can call anyone in the multiverse! And they're not restricted! I could prank call Star Butterfly for breaking my daughter's heart... maybe I could get someone with magic to program one of those to play Infant Elasmobranch for twelve hours straight. That would be a worthy use of magic, right?"

"I'm sure it would be, but on the first topic," Kepler said, fixing his new glasses, "I'm interested in sociology, and one of my books that I brought is on cults! So I actually had some suspicions on that too. And there's this little questionnaire, and I filled it out, see?"

"A... questionnaire?" Yvgeny asked, peering at the document Kepler was holding up.

"Yep," Kepler said. "And the only one I can say for sure is that they disapprove of a lot of the Mewman version of history. But given that Mewni isn't exactly known for being... historical, I can see why. But other than that, there really isn't much to go on. I guess the Forces of Evil could count as the leader with a grand title, maybe..."

"Nope," Tiana said. "They were given the name by the Mewmans. They're called a bunch of things here. Toffee to some, or Una'met, which apparently is a really common name here, or Kéta'cha. I have no idea what any of them mean, but they aren't grand titles, and even if they were, they're not in charge here. They need approval for everything they do, unless there is absolutely no way to get it."

"Yes, because they're good at ruling from the shadows," Yvgeny said.

"That's not much of a cult leader thing to do, though, is it?" Kepler asked. Then: "It's not, by the way. I looked it up."

"I don't know. I still don't trust them," Yvgeny muttered.

"Well, your suspicion may do you good," Kepler replied. "But for me... it's really nice to feel like, for once, the people in charge actually care about me."

"I suppose," Yvgeny said. "But we can't –

The door flew open. Shinjai burst in.

"Shinjai, sweetie, what's the matter? You're supposed to be babysitting!"

"Yeah," Shinjai said, out of breath. "Yvgeny, I'm sorry, your kids... they're gone!"

"What?!" Buff Frog said, panic stabbing through his heart. "My babies? What happened?"

"I put them down for the night, and read some of my book, but when I came to check on them a little while later, they were all gone!"

"All of them?" Yvgeny asked.

"I couldn't find any of them," Shinjai replied. "I'm so sorry, Buff Frog, I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," Yvgeny said, though he did not feel okay. The soulflowers usually moved out of the way of monster children, but that didn't stop him from imagining his babies getting tangled, or some other, horrible fate befalling them. "Just help me search for them. We will find them."

The dinner party turned into a search party. They combed the streets of the unfamiliar city, looking for the lost tadpoles.

It wasn't long before they were found. Not by the search party, but by someone else.

Yvgeny was shouting his tadpoles' names, one after another, when his flashlight (the general store owner had given them all some, and then joined the search party) illuminated a cluster of figures, coming towards him.

"Yvgeny!" one of them shouted in return.

"Dad!" said another.

It was Toffee, surrounded by all twelve of the tadpoles. 

Yvgeny didn't even care about the fact that Toffee was among them. He just ran for the group and hugged them all. Toffee made an awkward half-panicked expression and tried to wiggle out of it, but Yvgeny let them go and checked over every tadpole for injuries. None there.

"They snuck out and got on a train for the center of town," Toffee said. "I found them trying to get Dmitri off a roof. They were practicing hopping." They looked at Katrina, who looked away guiltily. "Apparently Katrina swiped the stoneshaper from the counter when Boris deliberately knocked a house plant over, distracting Shinjai."

"Oh, you have been bad children!" Yvgeny scolded. "Running away from your babysitter, scaring me half to death, and making this very busy person come pick you up. I am sure they have better things to be doing."

"It was no trouble, I assure you," Toffee said with a half-smile. "They were delightful."

"Yes, they are wonderful. But..." Why did you have to be the one to find them? "Even if it wasn't problem, they shouldn't have done it in the first place. They still scared entire neighborhood."

"Of course," Toffee said, still with that half-smile. "The thought of something terrible happening to your child is terrifying. I... I know that from experience."

And just like that, they were gone. Yvgeny wondered about that. Toffee was... a parent?

He would continue to wonder about it for several days. During those several days, he saw a lot of Toffee. They seemed almost omnipresent in Septarsis. And the children loved them, for they always had some trinket to hand out or bit of magic to show off. But Yvgeny never initiated a conversation with them, and they didn't try to talk either. They seemed to be willing to let him be.

And in that time, he thought it over. He had blindly followed Ludo before, and vowed that he would never be so stupid and gullible as to fall head-over-heels for any one person ever again. But, as he was soon realizing, Septarsis wasn't any one person. He found out they had an elected assembly, without any one person in charge. Toffee seemed to be in charge of defense, but they weren't in charge of when defense was necessary, using an elaborate system of calling stones to contact officials before they made major moves. They had talked with the assembly before most of their major actions; even the takeover of Ludo's castle was discussed with elected officials beforehand. The council had been split on whether to kill Mina, apparently, and she was still alive.

"Personally," said the cranky old frog from down the block when he asked her, "I think they should've killed her. We don't want a repeat of the Patili Incident."

"There's not going to be a repeat of the Patili Incident!" her wife, a ghostly dog, shouted from down the grocery aisle, where she was picking raspberries from a carefully-tended bush. "It's just one warrior. Kéta'cha could kill her with both their hands tied behind their back! The council agreed that the moment she gets within a mile radius of a settled area, off with her head. But Sílthéy thinks she's useful, so she stays."

"Don't know how useful a Solarian Warrior is," muttered the old woman, who Yvgeny would later learn was named Sichei-Mí. "Useful for getting your head cut off, maybe!" She cackled at her own joke.

Yvgeny was glad he had been working on his Septarian and Frogian, mostly by bringing his babies with him to class and helping them study. The two old women talked in a slapdash combination of both, and he barely understood what was being said. He laughed weakly.

"Yes. They no electricity?"

"No way! They're not even in charge of Septarian heritage anymore! They write a few books on culture once in a moonless night, and make some practical stuff, but it's all magic theory and weapons for them. And they aren't even in charge of the magic! They’re only here when we need to punch things, not much else. And it’s horrifying… I don’t understand how they can kill so easily and still be okay afterwards. It’s creepy, really."

If there was a cult here, Yvgeny decided, Toffee was definitely not the leader.

Neither was their friend, Silvie, who was even more omnipresent than Toffee, if quieter about it. She seemed to have a strange magic about her, and Yvgeny didn't really know what to make of her entire... deal. But she was weird, and couldn't lie to save her life, and had about as much charisma as a wet sock. But she loved to tell stories. Yvgeny had once invited a lone small child into his house while he worked to find their parents, only to later realize that, no, that was Silvie in the form of a child. He came back to find her telling his children a story about a mermaid who fought against her oppressive society to reunite with her family.

She was strange, too. Very strange. But she constantly insisted that she was not in charge, and they should never do what she wanted, because she was "not very smart. Until I am. Sometimes I can be brilliant, but it's rare."

So. Septarsis was not a cult, and... he was starting to like it here. He still couldn't understand anyone, and he still was constantly on the hunt for suspicious behavior, but... he was beginning to realize that he could accept help without being gullible and an idiot. The help just... shouldn't have to come with conditions.

He was gathering the babies in the sitting room that connected all their bedrooms when the knock at the door came. He told them to wait while he met whoever it was. He opened the door to see Toffee standing there.

Oh boy, Yvgeny did not say, though doubtlessly Toffee could have read the small twinge of alarm that crossed his face and that he was now desperately trying to hide.

"Hello," they offered. "I only want to talk."

"Yes. Come in," Yvgeny said.

They nodded, and draped their heavy cloak on a hook by the door, leaving them in a long black long-sleeved dress. They were still wearing professional, fancy clothing, even now, though their mane was a little messy. Yvgeny was unsure if that indicated they felt this meeting was important, or if Toffee just dressed like that. (They just dress like that). And, of course, there were slits in the back that showed tiny Mewberty wings.

"I have no doubt that what you told me during your tenure as monster expert was true. You showed genuine frustration with the current system. That being said, now that you know who I am, and considering our previous encounter... does that change anything?"

"No, of course not," Yvgeny said, conscious of the many ways Toffee could probably find to ruin him if he stepped a hair out of line. Ludo was one thing, but he was in Toffee's city, surrounded by Toffee's people. And he had nowhere to run – Meteora was presumably out there, and he did not want to become one of her floating, lifeless... dolls.

But Toffee didn't seem convinced. They looked at him steadily with those weird green eyes, and Buff Frog knew they didn't believe him.

Then Toffee laughed. Wait. Laughed? It was small, quiet, but it was a laugh. "You know I don't believe you. But I don't mind. Don't worry, I need you far more than you need me. Because when my latest plan inevitably fails, I need someone close to the high princess. A... friend of mine did a very stupid thing, and I'll need the princess's help to fix it, but she would never trust me and I don't trust her. So we'll need an inbetween."

"And you want me?"

"Yes. And Shinjai. I need as many people screaming in her face as loudly as possible to do something. We don't have much time. I'm even thinking of freeing that Solarian warrior... I suppose she's useful after all."

"You think Star would listen? She is... not very good at listening."

"Yes, you're right. That's why I can't do the screaming myself. I need people she trusts. Whether I can trust them, and whether they trust me, is secondary, as long as the message is delivered."

Yvgeny nodded. "I suppose that makes sense. I admit, though... I still don't trust you. You think ends justify means far too much for me."

Toffee nodded. "There's the truth. Don't worry, I don't mind at all."

"Dad, when are you going to read the story to us?" Katrina asked, poking her head in the living room.

"Uh, sorry sweetie, we have a visitor," Yvgeny said, gesturing at Toffee, who was suddenly staring at the whorls of stone and wood in the coffee table like they held the answers to sending their mysterious message.

They seemed to start. "No, tell your story. I... I definitely will need you. Sooner, rather than later. I have a lot of work to do." They... they were younger than they had been. A child. They were fiddling with the straps on the dress, and the fabric magically shrunk, making the dress still fit them. Their coat, still on the door, was far too big for them now.

Yvgeny knew, in his mind, that all denizens of Mewni whose families had lived in Mewni for around a hundred generations gained strange magical powers, even before the wand. And Toffee's family, just like his, had lived in this magic-soaked place for thousands of years. But he'd never seen someone change forms so fast.

"Are you okay?" Yvgeny eventually settled on.

They looked up at him. "I will be. I took a gamble I knew was going to fail, and it just failed. But that just makes it more important that you go back to Mewni and give the princess her message. Meteora is defeated, you can come back."

Yvgeny nodded. He was about to open his mouth to ask what the message was, but Katrina interrupted.

"I don't want to leave," she said. "I like it here."

"Me neither," Dimitri said, peeking in behind Katrina. "I can hop as high as I want, and Toffee will always get me off the roof."

"And Silvie tells such awesome stories!" said Nadia.

"The food's way better," said Boris.

"And the ghosts tell me all kinds of things. The ones that know Mewman, that is. But I'm going to learn to speak to them all!" Irina finished. She stared at her tiny hands. "Soon I will be unstoppable."

The rest of the tadpoles nodded eagerly.

"You all want to stay?" Yvgeny asked. "We can go home, and I can work at castle again. Wouldn't that be good?"

"Nah," was the unanimous response.

"I wanna ride the train as much as possible," Leo said. "And if we leave, you won't see me until it's time to go, because I'll be riding the train."

"But what about the thick fog?" Toffee asked, kneeling down to be even height with the babies. Wait, was Toffee encouraging them to leave? What? "It chokes out the sun, hiding its warmth. And it is poison, it will kill any Mewman that comes close. Don't you have Mewman friends?"

"Our only Mewman friend was Star, and I'm sure you can put a bubble on her head if she ever needs to come here," Alexi said. "But if she doesn't need to come here we can use our calling stone."

"Yeah! That's the big part!" Katrina said. "If we leave here, we can't talk to you and Silvie and Shinjai and Raibona and Sichei-Mí and everyone, but if we stay, we can still talk to Star! So it makes sense to stay here."

Yvgeny looked at Toffee, who glanced over and shrugged their shoulders. "I'm sure the housing council and senates will be fine if you stay."

Yvgeny looked at their children, who were doing their very best puppy dog eyes. "Okay," he finally said. "We can stay."

Shouts of joy from the children. Yvgeny smiled. "Now children, let's read a bedtime story and go to sleep." He turned to Toffee. "We'll talk with Star in the morning."

Toffee nodded. 

Yvgeny walked into the sitting room accompanied by all twelve of his babies. Toffee moved to get their cloak and leave.

"Hey," Yvgeny said. Toffee looked back at him. "Anyone can listen to me reading, if they like."

Toffee blinked. A pause. "Well... I don't have anything better to do," they said.

"So, when will we contact Star?"

"That's a new problem. Something's blocking our calling stones. This only seems to apply if we try to contact anyone in the castle. And I sent Shinjai to try to talk to Eclipsa in the Beacon, but she hasn't been able to... find it. Something or someone is messing with magic, to try and stop us." A sigh. "And I have a feeling I know who it is."

Chapter Text

"I'm done helping you. I'm done doing your dirty work. I'm done caring about you at all. I'm going to do the first good thing I've ever done in my life, and I'm going to find out for myself if any of what you've forced me to believe is true. Now get out of my life, and stay out!"

Marcie had to take a break from researching the very important impending doom that was coming for them all to hand out invitations for the coronation that was so important it was stopping them from actually doing something about said impending apocalypse.

Needless to say, it had to go without a hitch. She was pulling out all the stops, going door to door, anything to make this event be the last and only thing stopping the people who could actually do something about the literal apocalypse from doing something about the literal apocalypse. 

Janna, who knew but had pretended Marcie was telling her about it for the first time, was helping her. And Toffee, who was using their calling stones to spy on all of Mewni, found them very admirable, and did their best to help the dynamic duo, using their magic to make sure the event was just... peachy. They hadn't tried to contact her. They didn't know if their presence was welcome after their last meeting, where they had thrown Marcie into a rock. 

They had burnt far too many bridges with that attempt, they had to confess.

Eclipsa, Star, and Globgor were trying their best to make the coronation a success for very different, petty political reasons. Look, there's no nice way to say it, but they were idiots. Well, not Globgor, who didn't know about the impending apocalypse and would have been very justifiably angry about not being told about the literal end of the world, but still. Also, Star had had bizarre dreams lately. They seemed to almost be arguing about whether or not she should be more worried about the end of the world. First she'd dream about the world ending, then the next dream she would be seized with the knowledge that it wasn't that bad, really. She decided she'd head to the magic dimension to see what was up as soon as the coronation went perfectly.

Unfortunately, someone else was determined to ruin it. For very admirable and justified reasons, unlike the other one trying and failing to ruin it, but they were going to be successful at throwing a wrench in the proceedings.

So there are the actors that really matter in this play. The three trying to keep this event from failing because of the apocalypse, the three who wanted this event to succeed for more petty reasons, the one failing epically at making it fail epically because they were too busy with... other things, and the last one, the most crucial of them all: the one who would carelessly ruin it because they didn't know how important it really was, and they had to do this thing while everyone was distracted, okay?

But let us begin with Marcie and Janna.

"Ugh! We still have so many invitations to hand out! How are we gonna deliver them all?" Marcie said, standing by Janna in the main hall. They had handed out invitations in all of Butterfly Village and were moving on to the castle, but they still had... oh, I don't know, the entire rest of Mewni to hand them out to. "Maybe we can get Star to do some magic..."

Janna sighed, and grabbed the stack from Marcie. "Come on, here. Let me show you how it's done. Hmm..." She scanned around and picked a Mewman on their compact. "Hello, sir. Hand these out to three hundred of your friends before midnight, or you'll die."

The Mewman screamed, dropped the compact, and ran off with the invitations. Everyone knew by now that Janna always kept her promises.

"You know, I should have a problem with this, but no. Let's print out five hundred more."

"Pfft, do a thousand."

Star hovered anxiously in the hospital wing. She took a deep breath and walked up to her mother. "Heyy, Mom. How's it going?"

"Hello Star," Moon said. She was sitting up in bed, reading a book. River was sleeping in a chair by her. "My last surgery is done! I'll have to stay in a wheelchair for another few weeks, but I should be free to leave in a couple days."

"Great!" Star said. "Uh, so, what if you spent one of those days... going to Eclipsa's coronation?" She held out an invitation.

River woke up. "Absolutely not! I hate those stuffy royal ceremonies. They make you wear itchy clothes and eat weird tiny food off those little plates! It's been nice, not having to do that. I won't do it, you cannot make me!"

"River, go back to sleep."

"Okay." And he did.

"But Eclipsa's coronation... she hasn't had one yet?"

"Well, we've been kind of busy. And we wanted to make it special, you know? I worked really hard on it, so... could you come?"

Moon opened the invitation. "It's because of Eclipsa I'm this injured, you know."

Star tried to protest, but Moon continued.

"It's because of her that dark magic has entered the Realm of Magic. It's because of her foolishness that we're even in this mess of royal bloodlines and succession."

Star sighed. "Yeah, I know, but –"

"But she was trying to do the best for her family," Moon said. "She did her best for her mother, husband, and daughter, and... I'd like to think I'd try to do the same."

Star smiled.

"I'll come, if the doctors allow it. And I'll try my best to get River to come, even if I can't get him to wear nice clothes. But... did you mean to call it a 'corn-on-ation?'"

Star's smile vanished. "Oh no. Marcie... you were supposed to spell check!"

Marcie and Janna, in the process of carrying stacks of invitations to towns and conning some poor rube into delivering them all faster, discovered something... unsettling, in the Johanson desert, around a small oasis.

It was a large village of yurts, of at least a thousand people. And it wasn't on any map. And when Janna tried their schtick, their victim refused to do it.

"I don't care who you are, Janna the Witch!" the guy said. "I am a man of principle, and I would never hand out your filth and allow it to spread. We are here because Eclipsa cast us aside, and we will not spread her lies and propaganda to the other pure souls here! I would rather die!"

"Dude. It's just invitations to the coronation of Eclipsa. You can come, or not come, or come and try to overturn the coronation like Eclipsa doesn't have the Wand, or you can commit petty theft. Knowing about it won't hurt you."

"That is what Eclipsa wants us to think! Our mighty leader thinks differently!" He quickly grabbed and brandished a pitchfork. "Come, my brethren! Drive these monster fangirls out! Out!"

And then came the torches and pitchforks, as a ton of townsfolk, the Maizelys and, inexplicably, Manfred, among them, charged at them like they'd been practicing. Janna and Marcie quickly got out of there.

It was unnerving to say the least. Janna sent a couple pigeons to spy on them, and Toffee made a mental note to keep an eye on them, and their "mighty leader."

Unfortunately, they had a good idea of who that was.

Marcie was mostly worried about the invitations that they'd lost in the chase, and the time it would take to print more out.

"Don't worry, I've got someone on the case," Janna said, cutting open a portal to the Castle's main print room. Sure enough, there was Tom, standing there and manning the printer and making it run at full capacity. He handed them a fresh stack without so much as looking at them, enraptured by the paper coming in and out of it.

Marcie waited until they'd portalled to the next location to mutter to Janna: "Does Tom even know how to, like, use technology?"

"He can work a compact, I taught him a thing or two about the ink, and if all else fails, the head printer will step in. All else will probably fail, though, so..."

"We'd better hope that the head printer is good," Marcie said.

"Oh, don't worry; he's printed out more propaganda leaflets than there are trees in Mewni."

The Butterfly Auditorium was a grand old building not far from Butterfly Castle. It stood several stories high and could accommodate thousands of people, with open air seating and sweeping architectural details in the shapes of dragons and butterflies. It had just finished extensive, costly renovations.

It had also been totally trashed by Meteora, and no one had had time to repair it. The coronation was to be held in the Spiderbite Auditorium, Butterfly Auditorium's less grand sister.

And what a coronation it was! So many monsters and Mewmans were beginning to cram into the giant open-air auditorium that Archibald, who was in charge of seating, was beginning to get worried he wouldn't have seats for everyone. The Spiderbites sat in prime seating in the balcony with the Magic High Commission, who all had a bizarre slate of guilty expressions on. Hekapoo tried for quietly disapproving but only managed to look like she was holding in a fart. Omnitraxus looked like ze would puke if ze wasn't busy staring off into space. And Rhombulus had a bizarre half-guilty, half-worried, half-really-really-relieved look on his eye. None of them looked like they wanted to be there.

They were early. Being fashionably late would imply this event was worth being fashionable about.

Glossaryck was fine, though. He thought he had nothing to be guilty about, of course. What a brat.

Backstage, everyone was freaking out, and Ruberiot was having a miniature meltdown. Why couldn't they be the one to sing the coronation song? Yes, they had worked to compose the coronation song with Eclipsa, but Eclipsa apparently already had an idea in mind. Something about "Globgor and I had this song we used to sing together" and "we really think we can make it fit a coronation, it's about our forbidden love and we can sing it to prove our love isn't forbidden anymore." There were no grand secrets or hidden reveals! It was just fluff! There was none of Eclipsa's death metal vibes!

"Why do you think I only play death metal? I have to save my voice for royal speeches, Ruberiot."

"It doesn't matter! Please just let me spill one secret! It can be a really small secret! Like, do you prefer cats or dogs?"

"Better be careful, Eclipsa," Star said. "If you don't give them a secret, they'll probably just make one up."

"That is why Globgor and I will be singing the song," Eclipsa said. "Globgor?"

"I'm ready," Globgor said, in a morose tone that sounded like he was barely checking in. He had been rather subdued ever since he was freed. Meteora's crystallization haunted them all.

Eclipsa tutted. "Oh dear, it looks like my string's broken." It was. "Globgor, dear, could you get some more? I keep them in the top drawer of my nightstand."

"Oh, yeah, okay," Globgor said. "I'll do that."

"Wait, I can just –" Star started, but Eclipsa raised her hand. Globgor left via the nearest tunnel entrance. "What? That's taking the long way, and we need to make sure Ruberiot hasn't snuck anything in –"

"I can make sure of that myself," Eclipsa replied. "And Globgor knows these tunnels, and he needs something to do." Star opened her mouth, but Eclipsa continued. "Something useful to do. He has been under a lot of stress. He was never equipped to rule over a nation whose people are divided like this. And... Meteora's crystallization was hard for both of us."

"Oh, yeah," Star said. "Uh, Marcie, you want to check Eclipsa's memorization for a bit? You've memorized the song, right?"

"Absolutely, to both," Marcie said.

Janna coughed. "And... uh, when you're done with that... I've gotten... I need to talk to you, Marcie. But I'll talk to Star first."

"Yeah?" Star asked. Janna gestured at her to follow her. They ended up in the darkened props room. "You know, I'm not usually pretty comfortable with following you into dark places. I mean, remember what happened last time?"

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up," Janna replied. "But I need you to understand one thing: I know about the impending magic apocalypse, and you need to stop it."

"Marcie told you about it?"

"Sure," Janna said, and she wasn't technically lying. "But I don't want to die a painful death, so you do what you need to do with the coronation and maybe put on some practical clothes under that gown, because you're going to have a wonderful coronation, and then you're going to butterfly up and fly to the Realm of Magic and fix everything."

"Yes, yes, okay," Star said. "But... is it that much of a disaster if magic, you know, goes away?"

"Yes, Star, it is. The universe literally runs on magic! It's a fundamental building block! And the darkness plague won't stop with magic! It won't stop until the entire multiverse and everything in it is dead!"

"Then why'd nothing happen when Toffee destroyed it all?"

Janna opened her mouth, then reconsidered. "Look... maybe that spell wasn't made to destroy anything forever," she settled on, face showing an expression Star thought was anger. "This coronation will be the best coronation in the history of coronations, okay? But we need to do something."

She left. Star nodded, and enchanted her gown to turn into more practical clothes at the twist of a hand. Then... wait. How did Janna know all of that? Did Glossaryck teach her that much? Why had he never taught her?

They all moved everything into position, and waited for the ceremony to start. But... Globgor didn't return. Tensions ran high. A few minutes passed. "Okay, I'm looking for him," Star said, and for once no one questioned her. She opened a portal to Butterfly Castle, and looked for him. "Globgor?"

She grabbed some strings from Eclipsa's nightstand, just to be safe, and then cast the finding spell. It led out of the castle. Star was confused at first, but then realized. "Oh no. The tunnels. Stupid, unreliable tunnels!"

She took a deep breath and flew like the wind down, through the bowels (ew) of the castle, and into the depths of Mewni itself. "Please, tunnels, it's not about me. You have to let me find Globgor. I need to find him. For his sake, since you always thought he was great, or whatever."

Star flew onwards, and eventually literally ran into Globgor, who was exiting the room where he and Meteora had been – were trapped. In the Monster Temple. "Uh... how'd you end up here?"

Globgor sighed. "Well, I thought I wanted to go to Butterfly Castle, but the tunnels... they work on what you want deep inside. And I guess I wanted to see her again, one more time. Before I'm crowned king."
"Yeah, I guess," Star said. She tried to see past him, to Meteora, but he blocked her. "Uh, if I'm here, I want to see her too."

"Well, uh, I can't let you do that," Globgor said.

"What? Why?"

"No reason," Globgor said, sweating. He changed size to fill nearly the entire tunnel entrance. 

"Globgor. I promise I won't be mad."

"Really?  Because I – there is nothing to be mad about. Nothing happened."

"Then why don't you let me in?" Star asked. 

Globgor sighed. "Okay, you got me." He shrunk down, and pointed inside. "Meteora got out. I swear it wasn't me."

Star looked inside. Meteora's crystal was gone. "Wait, what?" Star asked. "How did that happen?"

"Maybe Eclipsa found a way to get the wand charged up again?" Globgor said, pointing at the uncharged crystal wand which lay discarded on the ground.

"Maybe..." Star said. "She is on good terms with the spirit of magic, since she agreed to heal it."

"But it doesn't matter. No one goes to the Monster Temple, so no one can know."

"Right," Star said. "Let's not tap a free warnicorn on the horn here."

They returned to the Spiderbite Auditorium, where the overture was just starting, and everyone was on edge. Globgor took Eclipsa aside, ostensibly to fix her guitar but really to tell her about Meteora, and Star peeked out of the curtain to see her mom in the stands. She grinned. And it wasn't just her mom! So many people were here! It seemed everyone in the entire continent was there. Her eyes drifted over Bobalot, Leonard, Sir Scarsguard, all of the doctor team, her dad in a ridiculous shirt, that little Eclipsa fan she kept forgetting the name of, she could even recognize Higgs and Steelbert's armor among the knights guarding the auditorium. And people she didn't know, too. There were the Mims and the Millers, the horned toad, his dog husband, and their children, May and Anna. And there were two wolf people in fancy clothing near the Spiderbite Balcony, one in black and one in dark red. They didn't look familiar, did they?

Her gaze drifted back up to the Spiderbites, sitting in the royal balcony with the High Commission. Speaking of whom... there was something among them. It looked like a blur of static. And it was saying something to Hekapoo. Her eyes were widening, and she was looking at the stage. She was yelling something to the other High Commission members... oh no.

Star barely had time to think before Hekapoo and the High Commission portalled onto the stage. Hekapoo snapped her fingers, and the curtain hiding backstage from view burned away. The crowd gasped. Marcie, Janna, and Ruberiot ran for the fire extinguishers. Tom tried to put the fire out with his powers.

Eclipsa and Globgor, who had been standing off to the side, looked at each other in panic.

"So, Eclipsa," Hekapoo said as the fire raged around her. "When were you planning to tell the class about how you freed your daughter?"

The crowd didn't really gasp, which Hekapoo hadn't been expecting, clearly, because she looked a little disappointed. No, they had gasped more when Hekapoo had come over and set a fricking curtain on fire.

With the combined powers of the fire extinguishers, Tom, and Globgor's ability to manipulate air with his breath, the fire was quickly put out, which disappointed Hekapoo further, because she'd wanted dramatic lighting.

"Rhombulus, lock them up," Hekapoo said. "We can't let them destroy Mewni again." She turned to the crowd, who had breathed a sigh of relief – a sigh of relief! What an affront – when her awesome flames had been put out. "Everyone stay in your seats! We'll find that destroyer of Mewni and set this right! Omni?"

Omni, who had been dragged via crystal ball to this event and then through the portal, didn't say anything.

"Omni!"

"Hmm, what?"

"Form a shield around the arena! You know how to do it, or should I tell you how to do that, too?"

"Fine, sure, whatever." Ze formed a shield, and went back to staring into space.

"Okay, let's try this again," Hekapoo said. She didn't get a chance, because her gaze had slipped to Rhombulus. "Rhombulus what are you doing?!"

Rhombulus had locked up Eclipsa and Globgor with what had to be the world's flimsiest handcuffs. They barely fit Globgor, who could easily sizeshift out of them. Eclipsa was still holding the wand. "Uh... locking them up. How you do. Locking up some prisoners, do do do."

"With the crystals, you idiot! Use your crystals!"

The crowd laughed, which made Hekapoo even more mad.

Rhombulus sweated. "Well, uh, I totally would do that, but... they're still the king and queen."

"Not officially!"

"Yeah, 'cause you crashed the coronation!" someone in the stands shouted.

"I got the best seats for this?!"

"Boo! I haven't heard a single song! Give the people what they came here for!"

"Rhombulus." Glossaryck said, floating by Hekapoo. "Do as your sister told you."

Eclipsa, Star, and everyone who knew Glossaryck gasped. Not Omni, though, ze, if it were possible, looked even further away.

And not Janna. She ended a video of the scene, and sent it to that dragon emoji person she had been texting, with the caption "You might want to see this."

"Glossaryck... I thought you wanted to... don't you –"

"The Magic High Commission has made a decision, Star," Glossaryck said calmly. "And I shall go along with its decision. Now, Rhombulus."

Rhombulus sweated. "R-right, uh..."

"Wait!" Star said. "Don't crystallize them! I'll find Meteora, and you – you can talk it over, please!"

Glossaryck opened his mouth, but Hekapoo beat him to it. "Okay, fine, Star. Go find Meteora, who, because of the tunnels, could be anywhere, including in the Mountains of Incurable Anguish. That'll definitely work."

"Give me an hour," Star said. "I know where to find her."

Marcie looked out at the crowd, now painfully visible without the curtain. They were extremely unhappy. Marcie had to make this event a success. Even if everyone else didn't. What could she do here? She looked around, and – oh! "And while Star is off finding Meteroa, Ruberiot shall sing introductory songs about Eclipsa!"

Eclipsa gasped, sitting "handcuffed" in the wings. "Oh no."

Meteora stared out at the water around her, filtered through the bubble around her head. Around her were ruins, ruins of her old life. Or her old old life. She thought she had been doing okay at this, but... how did the Commission know about her magic? And was she doomed to be hated by everyone, running from place to place, only one harebrained scheme away from being crushed under the weight of all her mistakes?

Maybe she should have been trapped in crystal the whole time. It would have made things better, certainly. She never would have destroyed Mewni.

Why did she destroy Mewni? In hindsight, it had been a spur-of-the-moment decision. Maybe it was the voice in her head. They had actually given her a sense of justice, of fighting to make the world better. And maybe they'd even been a little bloodthirsty. By the time she'd been freed, the only thing holding her back was Saint Olga, but when Saint Olga had made her choose between her and the voice, she'd snapped.

And maybe she was confused. Rhombulus said staying in crystal that long could make anyone at least a little confused. Maybe he even was right.

But she'd learned now not to listen to the voices in her head, regardless.

Something touched her shoulder, breaking her out of her stupor. She whirled around to see Star, in full Butterfly mode, floating over her, in a bubble of her own. She said something, and then pointed upwards.

Meteora shrank back in on herself. She didn't want to be caught, she didn't want to be put back in a crystal. Would Star throw her back into the arms of the High Commission?

But Star made a placating gesture, and then a thoughtful one. She raised her upper pair of arms and her bubble expanded, covering them both.

"Hey, Meteora," Star said, voice now carrying through the air.

"I don't want to go back," Meteora said. "Please don't make me go back."

"I know, I know. But, Meteora, the High Commission know that you escaped. Your parents are in danger, and I'm not sure how long Rhombulus's stupidity and Omnitraxus's weird obliviousness will save them. Hekapoo gave me an hour to find you and bring you back, and if I don't they'll both be crystallized."

Meteora buried her head in her hands. "I – I..." She trailed off.

"Meteora, even Glossaryck thinks they should be crystallized."

"What?" Meteora gasped. "Glossaryck would never! He was the one who taught me to do magic!"

"Yeah, well, he said... he said the High Commission had made a decision, and he had to abide by it."

"Glossaryck taught me to do magic... he set me up! He taught me to do magic, so that they could have an excuse to crystalize me!"

Star sighed. "Yeah... it does look like that," she finally settled on.

Meteora wanted to be angry. She wanted that old fire to spring up in her. She'd been crystalized for a while, right? Where was that confused rage?

But she hadn't been visited by the voice during her most recent crystallization. Or, well, only once. I'm going to let you figure out the rest on your own, and then they were gone. And... "Maybe Glossaryck was right. Maybe I do deserve this."

"Glossaryck is a pile of Warnicorn poop, Meteora," Star said. "I don't think you deserve this. And in case you haven't figured it out, there's something weird going on, and I think it involves all of us."

"What?" Meteora said.

"You know, all of us!" Star pointed to her cheekmarks. "Me, Eclipsa, Moon, and you! Us with the playing card-themed cheekmark! I think something important is coming, that it has to do with us. And... I think Glossaryck's trying to prevent it. So let's forget about him. He's a buttface, and we're going to face our stupid destiny and get it over with before he can even blink. So let's do this. None of us will be crystalized, and I'll fight to make sure of it. But I'll need your help." She held out all three of her hands. Dramatic music swelled.

Meteora smiled, but didn't reach out. "I feel like you're reaching out dramatically, but I have no idea where you are."

Star blinked. "Oh, right." She flew down and picked up Meteora's hand. The dramatic music returned. "Let's do this."

" She's dark, some say mean, " Ruberiot sang. Eclipsa, who was still locked in the world's flimsiest handcuffs and watched over by the High Commission, groaned.

" But in the end she's still our queen.
And so far she's done alright,
No babies eaten, no fearful frights.
We thought she'd change it all,
But nothing has changed.
We thought we'd all be caught in her thrall,
But she is not deranged.
She's our new queen, she isn't mean,
She's paved the way, she's against the machine.
Eclipsa, yeah!"

... I am appalled. So was Eclipsa. "Boo!" she shouted from the wings. "That's the worst one so far!"

"Excuse me, you try to come up with fifty songs in a row! My early ones were great!"

"I thought it was okay. You're improving, Ruberiot!" Globgor said, winking at them.

A cough, from the audience. "Okay, I'm done with this. Omnitraxus would you please let us out of here?"

"Yeah, this should legally qualify as torture!"

"I'll get on that, as soon as I'm let out of these handcuffs," Eclipsa said.

Cheers, from the crowd. "Let her out!" someone shouted, and the stands started shouting it as well. "Let her out! Let her out! Let her –"

A portal opened in the center of the stage, behind Ruberiot. They quickly moved out of there. Star came through, with Meteora by her side. 

The High Commission was relieved. Finally, back to business. Well, except for Omnitraxus, who wasn't paying attention. And Rhombulus, who looked... disappointed.

Meteora was not chained up in any way. It was bizarre to most of the people there. She stepped towards the High Commission. "Hey. I'm here. Let my parents go."

"Nah," Hekapoo said. "That was never the arrangement, sorry." 

Meteora growled. "Well, then what was the arrangement, then?"

"Star said we could 'talk it out.' And now we've talked. "Rhombulus, lock 'em up."

"Star!"

"Sorry! I just wanted to give you a chance!"

"Well, I think I've wasted it," Meteora said. She grew, not as large as her father could get, but still to a good two meters. Good for intimidation. "So what do you want to do? Fight us? All four of us?"

Globgor and Eclipsa broke their flimsy handcuffs in unison. Eclipsa was still holding the wand.

"Because I don't think that's a fight you can win."

Hekapoo snorted. "Well, it's a fight we will win! Come on, guys!"

"Wait!" Globgor shouted. "Fight us if you must, but don't hurt the civilians in the stands!"

"Fine, whatever. Omni, protect the mortals in the stands," Hekapoo said. "Let's do this."

Omni put his shield over the Mewmans and monsters in the stands. They all looked various stages of anxious, though many looked relieved Eclipsa had fought for them. Moon looked ready to tear down the shield and join the fight, though on whose side it remained to be seen.

"Rhombulus! Crystalize these traitors!" Hekapoo shouted.

Rhombulus didn't do that, instead opting to be punted into the wall by Globgor. He didn't get up.

Star summoned her full butterfly form and flew at Hekapoo, punching her across the face with Rainbow Fist Punch. She then blasted her with narwhals, but another Hekapoo appeared behind her and yanked her away, though she did it too late for two other Hekapoo clones.

Marcie ran up and karate-chopped down, extinguishing the flame on her head. Star then created a shield wall around them both as more Hekapoo clones advanced on them. They started slicing at her with dimensional scissors, but couldn’t find many weak points. Then Star cast Tiara Tornado, and most of the Hekapoo clones didn’t manage to dodge. Marcie quickly extinguished the rest.

Tom defended Ruberiot and the other un-powered Mewmans on stage from stray spells. It wasn't the most glamorous side of the battlefield, but it avoided any accidental tragedies. 

Globgor and Meteora fought Omnitraxus together, whose strategy seemed to consist of swatting at them until they went away. Meteora tried to aim her soul drain, but Omnitraxus was easily able to warp his form to dodge. 

Two sizeshifters were a huge pain to deal with, even if Meteora couldn't work as well in a team as Globgor. Since Omnitraxus was a big target, he was easy for her to hit, even with her blindness.

Omnitraxus was a sizeshifter of sorts too, though. Ze kept getting bigger to match Globgor and Meteora, and zir attention was slowly shifting from whatever it was ze was doing to actively fighting. Ze finally manifested fully, in zir enormous coyote form, and swatted Globgor and Meteora away with a paw. But they had an ace up their sleeve: Eclipsa. She primed her wand and sent a burst of purple light through Omnitraxus's chest. It ripped through, leaving a hole that would take a while to repair. While Omnitraxus was occupied with what would've been a mortal wound if ze had been mortal, Star flew upwards away from her attackers and Eclipsa caught Hekapoo and all her clones in an inescapable magic cobweb.

"Dang, I forgot how strong that thing is," Star said, landing by Eclipsa and gesturing to the wand. The crowd cheered. Maybe they would get to go home soon.

Through it all, it seemed the odds were already stacked in the queen’s favor. Hekapoo, Omnitraxus, and, if we’re awarding participation trophies, Rhombulus were constantly missing strikes, failing to dodge attacks, and walking into traps. “Ha! The Magic High Commission is a joke!” Star said, as the last Hekapoo clone was extinguished by the tangle of the cobweb.

Totally unrelated, Janna was livestreaming the whole event. She didn’t look very impressed by either side.

Then a blinding pink and gold light lit up the stage. Star, Eclipsa, Meteora, and Globgor were all encased in pink light that froze them in place, completely unable to move. Marcie was spared, and looked for its source, only to confirm her worst fears. Glossaryck had entered the battle, and, for the first time in the history of the multiverse, was standing up for his children. He freed Hekapoo from her net with a brush of a hand, and healed Omnitraxus with a snap of his fingers. Then he turned to Rhombulus, who was lying with his crystal head facing away, arms askew, one leg bent.

In the stands, River got up and started pounding on Omnitraxus's force field. Everyone in the stands looked ready to join him.

"Rhombulus, I know you can get up," Glossaryck said.

Rhombulus gasped. "Uh... you're right, I can stand up," he said, sitting up. "But should I?" He stood up, and doubled over exaggeratedly. "Ow, my leg!"

"Rhombulus, we both know your leg doesn't hurt. Now crystalize these traitors."

Eclipsa charged up her wand, power thrumming through her. Star and Meteora, hearing that, did the same with their hands.

Glossaryck turned and locked eyes with them all at the same time, and their power faded and glitched out, and a stream of golden magic in the Realm of Magic flowed free for the first time in over seven centuries.

The wand's power faded. Star and Meteora's power faded. Moon fell out of the butterfly she'd summoned to try to help River knock the wall down.

Rhombulus stood up fully. "Uh..."

"Are you not listening?" Glossaryck said, turning back towards him. "Crystallize them all."

Star, whose mouth had been frozen closed, whimpered.

Rhombulus looked at her, and then Meteora, and Eclipsa. "...no."

"What?" Glossaryck asked.

"No!" Rhombulus shouted. "No, I won't. I won't crystalize them! I told you, I'm tired of doing your dirty work! I'm tired of begging for your respect! These are good people, and you're a horrible dad! I'm tired of doing your bidding! I'm tired of everyone using me to lock their problems away, and then treating me like crap for it! I'm not going to hurt people for you anymore!" Rhombulus summoned and threw a crystal at Glossaryck, shattering the pink crystal on his forehead. "You can go rot in –"

Glossaryck flicked a finger, and Rhombulus flew into the wall. This time, he really didn't get back up. Hekapoo and Omnitraxus gasped.

The crowd gasped as well. Many of them tried to run away, but others joined Moon and River in trying to smash down Omnitraxus's wall.

"Well, I guess I'll have to make a new son to be manager of warfare," Glossaryck said, shrugging. "This time I can make him without free will! That'll be so nice."

The wall separating the stands from the stage cracked, shattered, and fell to the ground, pieces dissipating into scattered spacetime.

"Oops." Omnitraxus said. Ze and Hekapoo turned away from Glossaryck. We won't hurt you, but we're not going to help you, either.

The crowd rushed for the stage.

Rhombulus's stand had been enough to break Glossaryck's focus on the spell on the wand and its magic, pushing the wand's stream of magic back into its forced flow. Moon was the first to reach the stage, using her butterfly speed to race for that traitor who'd nearly crystalized her daughter.

Star realized she could do magic again too, and struggled against her bonds. Then a wolf person holding a knife ran up to her. She would have screamed and asked them how they snuck a knife in there, but her mouth was closed. She tried, though. But... they delicately grabbed one of her hands, and sliced away the pink light around her hand and forearm, and then freed her entire arm, and then she could help them peel away the weird pink light from her body.

"What a weird spell," she commented.

The wolf shrugged, and handed her the knife. "Free your family," they only said, and then they were gone, tending to Rhombulus.

Star nodded, and ran to Meteora.

Meanwhile, even Glossaryck was having trouble against the huge crowd. He kept trying to multiply but more bodies means more pain to feel, so he was having trouble. Yes, yes, yes! Get wrecked, loser. His pain was ensured by his limited magic budget. With very little struggle, comparatively, Bobalot grabbed him, fouling his wings and holding him high above the crowd, too weak to even struggle. "The evil has been defeated! This creepy little man is dead!"

"I don't think you can kill Glossaryck," Eclipsa said, peeling off the last of her pink light prison. 

"Well, as dead as he can get!" Bobalot said.

"Everything hurts..." Glossaryck groaned. Now you know how it feels, you jerk.

Eclipsa lifted her umbrella, flew over, and plucked Glossaryck from Bobalot. She then flew for a small raised stage-within-a-stage Ruberiot was putting up. "Alright everyone, thank you for the eventful coronation!"

The crowd cheered. Eclipsa smiled. 

"That was the coolest coronation I've ever seen!"

"Yeah, Eclipsa was awesome! The way she took out Omnitraxus? So cool!"

"I got to crush a tiny little man! It was so great!"

Star finished freeing Globgor and smiled. Seemed people were accepting Eclipsa as queen... It was everything Star had wanted. She glanced at Rhombulus, who looked much better, albeit confused. The strange wolf person wasn't anywhere near him. Neither was their companion. Star looked for them, but she couldn't see them anywhere. Oh well. She'd wanted to thank them, but if they didn't want to be there, she wouldn't go looking for them. Everyone was free... in multiple senses. This would work.

"We'll figure out what to do with the High Commission soon. But first... we really must sing our coronation song," Eclipsa said. Globgor walked through the crowd to Eclipsa, and offered her her guitar. Eclipsa took it, and smiled. They were the same height, despite Eclipsa standing on the podium. Globgor could always be her height, no matter what.

"It's some kind of magic,
When we make it through the night.
It's some kind of magic,
When we face what's wrong or right.
And head to the future,
Where nothing's quite so clear.
But I won't ever falter (won't ever falter),
When it's you I'm with, my dear,
'Cause all I wanna do
Is stay in Mewni with you.
And all I wanna see
Is you right here next to me."

A few people went back to their seats, but most of them stayed below Eclipsa's second stage, humming along. People started to take out flashlights, so Marcie took out her phone. She opened it up, but before she could turn on the flashlight, a call came through. The sound of Pink Unicorns blasted through her part of the stage. She apologized hastily and moved to dismiss it as spam, but then she read the name of the caller.

"Oh." Marcie said. "I gotta – I gotta take this call." She left the stage quickly, and accepted the call. 

1. In Butterfly Castle, there was a hole in the floor of the queen's bedroom, where a small drop of corrosive ooze had once dropped from the Royal Magic Wand. The ooze that created the hole had dropped through the floorboards, and then through the kitchen and its floorboards, then through the tunnels and ground and mantle and deep down into Mewni's core, unable to hurt anyone. Or so it was thought. But traces of it still existed, in the air and wood and space itself it touched.
2. In the Monster Temple, where Eclipsa Butterfly had performed the Darkest Spell on a crystal donut, little specks of darkness remained, hanging in the air and rock around where the spell had been cast. The donut, the target of the spell, was long gone, but the splash from it was slowly spreading and poisoning the air.
3. Moon Butterfly practically beamed as she left the coronation. Her daughter, Star, was growing into such a strong, clever young woman, and she was so proud of her. She was sorry she had to leave so early, but her arm was acting up, and when she looked close, there was a spot of purple on it. It appeared the dark magic infection was back, and it was time to extract bits of herself again, to stop it from taking her arm. It was a good thing she had good doctors. 
4. In a small house in Echo Creek, Earth, Angie and Rafael Diaz were having a strange time. It appeared that a strange purple mold was taking over their newly-rebuilt house and yard. It seemed to come from everywhere at once. They had asked their former exchange student, Star Butterfly, if it was something magical, since they couldn't figure out what was going on. Star didn't know, though she said it probably came from Mewni, since Butterfly Castle was experiencing a similar infection. It wasn't dangerous. Not yet.
5. Miquiz, a young and spry ghost at the tender age of three hundred and fifteen, and his friend Mocel, an older ghost (eight hundred and nine), stared at the purple hole in Miquiz's dead body. "I'm pretty sure that hole wasn't that big when you died," Mocel noted in worry. Miquiz made a frantic sign, that Mocel didn't need to know SSL to know indicated he was terrified. Even if he could convince the hospital staff to let him free, the corruption would follow him no matter how far he ran from this small, miserable hospital room. He was going to die again. Maybe surrendering himself to Lady Life would be worth never getting closure. He didn't know, not really.
6. A nameless Septarian studied the scar on their right middle finger. It was definitely darker than it had been when they first got it. Damn it. "I suppose you foresaw this, too?" they said, glaring at the other person in the room with them.
   "Oh, yeah, you might want to ditch the finger," the other person said. "Sorry about that. It won't spread if you get all the purple bits out."
   Nameless sighed in annoyance. "Fine. I liked having that finger back. I hope this is part of your brilliant plan."
   "You have no right to lecture me on necessary sacrifices."
   "At least I don't take stupid, dangerous, factually unsupported risks with no plan to fix them." Nameless picked up their spear and morphed it into a knife. At least they had surgical experience. Would make this as painless as possible. They would safely dispose of the biological waste – in the Void probably, where it would be slow to spread.
   They cut down. 

7. All those little droplets of darkness, wherever they ended up, stayed.
8. And they began to spread.

Chapter Text

Star collapsed in a comfy chair next to Eclipsa, who was already dressed in her pajamas. "Whew. I don't want to do anything for another week."

"Well, we still need to do something about the High Commission. We'll get Rhombulus out of this for sure, and Glossaryck will be as locked up as much as we can with someone like Glossaryck. But... Hekapoo and Omni... I don't know. They both have important roles in the multiverse. Hekapoo can cut off dimensional transit whenever she likes, which I do not want happening. And Omnitraxus's job is to fix rifts in spacetime. Which we do not want to stop happening. And both of them can appear in multiple places at once... honestly I almost wish one of them were the turncoat."

"Except you don't, because Rhombulus freed your daughter. No one else could've done that."

"Yes, but people would listen to Hekapoo and Omnitraxus. Unfortunately, no one listens to Rhombulus."

"Well," said Janna, from her place sitting in the chair next to Star. "Star won't be listening to Rhombulus right now, because she will be fixing the dark magic plague that's going to destroy the entire Multiverse. Right, Star?"

"Oh shoot. I forgot about that," Star said.

"How long have you been there?" Eclipsa asked.

"Long enough," Janna said.

And when the dam broke, it broke all at once.

"Hey, Star," Marcie said, walking in. Her phone was calling Shinjai's new compact, on speaker. "Shinjai is on the line. She's with Buff Frog and a bunch of Septarian magic experts. Apparently the junk from Eclipsa's wand is such a horrifying impending doom even Toffee is worried about it."

An All-Seeing Eye opened. Toffee appeared on the other end. "Oh, thank Taulitza. Look, Princess, we've had our differences in the past, but you need to believe me that the Multiverse is in danger –"

"I get it! I get it!" Star groaned.

Her compact rang. She sighed and opened it. "Hey, Tom, what is it?"

"The ghosts are rioting!" Tom shouted. "They're saying that the world is ending! I'm a little concerned –"

He was audibly pushed aside and Mocel's voice replaced him. "We will not be silenced! The world is ending, and you idiots have to fix it!"

Star growled and pulled on her hair. "I know I know I know I know –"

"Hey, uh, Your Majesty?" Eclipsa's attendant, the small monster named Archibald said, coming in. "The peasants are... rioting. Apparently the cooks in the kitchens found a weird dark hole in the floorboards and ceiling, and it's spreading, and there's rumors that, well, the apocalypse –"

"SHUT UP! SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP! I'll go, just give me a day!"

Silence.

Janna, Marcie, Shinjai, Yvgeny, Toffee, Archibald, Tom, Mocel, the magic experts, and Eclipsa all spoke over each other. The general consensus was "A day? The Multiverse is dying, kiddo."

"A day! I'm really tired, I need sleep, and the Realm of Magic is really dangerous. Even more with the weird corruption junk. I mean, did you see what it did to my mom? I am not going there after a big day with no sleep and no plan. Oh Forces of Evil, I'm planning things. What the heck."

"I was not aware I was an expression," Toffee said, "but you could use Crescenta's sleep spell."

"What?"

"Crescenta's spell, 'Malum Latine Pro Sommo,' I believe it's called. One of only three useful spells that overeager idiot created. Allows you to get a full eight hours of sleep in four minutes."

"You know it?" Marcie said. "I know it's a spell, but I didn't write down how it worked. I really should've, since you burned the spellbook."

Toffee shrugged. "Why would I burn it without copying it?"

"You... all that knowledge... isn't lost?"

"Hey, where were you when we desperately needed a spell to break Rhombulus's crystals?" Eclipsa asked.

"Forgive me for not caring much about the happiness of the woman who murdered Miquiz," Toffee replied coldly.

Silence.

"Damn," Janna said, breaking the silence.

Which was immediately replaced by more silence.

And then Shinjai: "Hey, I hate to interrupt, but we are all literally about to die. Can we do the spell and come up with a great plan together and send Star to the Realm of Magic so she can fix everything and then we can snipe at each other as much as we want?"

"Yes, you're right," Toffee said. "It's not a complex spell. Just charge up your hands and say 'Malum Latine Pro Somno' and you'll fall asleep. Do it somewhere comfortable."

"Okay," Star said. She sat back in her chair. "Malum Latine Pro Somno."

She blinked awake, to Marcie pushing in a whiteboard. "Okay, guys, let's plan. Star, you've been to the Realm of Magic before. What's it like?"

"Excuse me, but Toffee was there for a whole six months!" one of the magic expert guys said.

"But I'm the only one who's been there when it was all corrupted," Star said.

Toffee shrugged. Star smiled. A victory! She knew something Toffee didn't know! "The gold magic is bad. It makes your thoughts reality. The purple magic is worse. It burns you like acid."

A cough, from the magic experts. Toffee rolled their eyes and moved over to talk to them. They were close enough to talk, apparently.

"What?" Shinjai asked. There was muffled whispering through the phone, just out of range of the speaker. Then Yvgeny came on the line. "Star. Please be careful. These things... we are meddling in things we do not understand."

Star smiled. "I'm as careful as I'll ever be, Buff Frog. And I've got magic. I'm great at it. Eclipsa, what did the Realm of Magic tell you to do when it talked to you?"

"It said I should give it back to the people it 'belonged' to. It's more of a concept than a person, so I guess its owners are... whatever owns magic."

"Glosaryck." Star realized. "He's the one who owns magic. I have to give it back to Glossaryck. Dang it, I hate Glossaryck."

Toffee raised an eyebrow. Unseen by Star, the magic experts made various expressions that amounted to "dang, this is advanced stupid. Yes, this idiot definitely should be trusted with magic."

Toffee glanced at them with a clear message. Unfortunately, none of us have much of a choice.

Star sighed. "Well, I guess we'd better talk to Glossaryck, then."

Glossaryck's notebook had been put in Butterfly Castle's dungeons, since they couldn't think of any other way to keep him there. Star, Eclipsa, and Marcie walked in. "Alright, Glossaryck," Star shouted, banging on the bars. "Come on out."

Nothing. Eclipsa sighed and used the wand to open the book.

Glossaryck floated out of the book. He did not look great. His very broken forehead crystal was still clinging to his head, there were several chips and dents in his scales, and several of the trapped pink spheres that would otherwise be embedded in his scales were loose and hovering around his body. "Whaddya want."

"Alright Glossaryck, we know that you're a no-good lying son of a crocodile now," Star said. Thanks.

"Yeah, I know, whatever, I showed my hand too early and now everything is going according to plan and I hate it, thanks. What do you want?"

"I know to fix this we have to give the magic back to you, but we can't trust you. So what will happen if we do it? Will you fix anything, or will you just do nothing with it?"

Glossaryck stared at her. Several emotions crossed his face, and then he replied: "I will fix the dark magic corruption as well as I'm able."

"Hmph. That'll have to do. But after, can you stay out of our business?"

"Yes, but you have to agree to fix the magic!" Eclipsa said.

"I know!" Marcie said. She took out her notebook, and wrote down something. She handed it to Glossaryck.

Glossaryck read it. "I, Glossaryck, the undersigned, do swear to do my absolute best to eliminate the dark magic poisoning, and that when magic is returned to its proper owner and cured of its affliction, I shall not appear or manifest in the dimension now called Mewni ever again. With my signature, I verify that this is true... and then a blank space for me to sign."

Marcie smiled, "I think I covered all bases. But I've added room for your own demands."

"Yes, you did," Glossaryck said, looking down at the notebook, which had plenty of room for additions and edits. "Well. I demand Rhombulus be put in the dungeon as well. And I demand that should you see or hear of me shirking my sentence, you give up the right to notice or acknowledge my presence. And I ask that you go to the Realm of Magic as soon as you can."

"Who is 'you'?" Marcie asked.

Glossaryck sighed. "The queens and princesses of Mewni, present and former, in the second clause, and Star, in the third clause."

Eclipsa nodded. "Very well. I suppose we should add that to the contract." She reached out a hand, and Glossaryck gave the notebook to her. She wrote down the new additions, with aid from Glossaryck and Marcie, who got the wording in the way all parties wanted it. Then she wrote down a place for all parties mentioned in the deal to sign. 

They signed. Marcie watched them sign, hoping she hadn't made a mistake. 

"Oh, Glossaryck, uh... could you teach me one last spell?" Star asked. 

Glossaryck shrugged. "Sure. Shoot."

"I need something to protect me in the Realm of Magic. It doesn't have to be forever, just something that will resist the dark magic and buy me time to get to the core of Magic."

Glossaryck took an unneeded breath, and then nodded. "Okay. Come here." And he taught her a spell.

They left. "Okay. Let's get Mom and Meteora's signatures and get me to the ROM."

"Rom?" Marcie asked. 

"Realm of Magic. You know, abbreviated."

"More like an acronym."

"Whatever, Marcie."

"I do hope we don't regret this," Eclipsa said as soon as they made it out of earshot, forgetting that Glossaryck could hear anything he chose.

Marcie shrugged. "I think we've got this. This means that if we fix the magic, whether it involves Glossaryck or not, he'll be out of our hair."

"Yes... but I worry that he'll deliberately not fix it. His mind is strange... he may be irresponsible with it."

"If he's smart, he won't. That would mean the destruction of everything."

"Not him," Eclipsa said.

"What?" Both Star and Marcie asked.

"He lives outside of time and space. Outside of everything that would be destroyed. The dark magic plague came from his dimension, I'm willing to bet. He wouldn't be hurt by it. There's no way to hurt him. No way to hold him accountable if he just lets us all die. He doesn't have a stake in this."

Was that true? Star wondered. Why... "He has to care about us. If he doesn't, then why does he come here at all? Why does he help us? Why did he make the High Commission, or the wand, or anything?"

"I don't know," Eclipsa said. "I... don't know."

"Okay. When you get to the Realm of Magic –"

"ROM."

"Right, the ROM," Marcie said. "You're going to put on the spell Glossaryck taught you and dive into the least-corrupted spot you can find. And you're going to keep your butterfly on and use the focusing techniques we forced out of Toffee to keep your mind clear and stop anything from manifesting."

"Yep," Star replied cheerfully.

They were back in the War Room, as Star was now calling it, but it was just the throne room with Marcie's whiteboard pulled in. Toffee was no longer visually there; they had joined Shinjai's call now that it had been proved to work fine and they had an excuse to hide their constant despairing expressions from Star. Even Toffee's ability to master their facial expressions had its limits. Tom was now there in person, as was Leonard, who had put away his 'THE END IS NIGH' sign, but was holding onto the brass bell he'd brought with both hands. It was expensive, he said, and he didn't want to misplace it. Archibald hovered nervously around, unsure of what to do. Janna offered him popcorn.

(Toffee, by the way, had not been "forced" to share their focusing techniques, in fact they were happy to share them. They did not want the dark magic spreading because Star thought more into being.)

"And then you're going to reach the core, and... then what?"

Star shrugged. "I've never been in the core of magic. I'll figure it out when I get there."

"So you're going to... wing it."

"Yeah, basically," Star said, gesturing at her Mewberty wings. "Wing it? Ayyyy?"

No one laughed.

One of the magic experts walked far enough away to be out of the range of the mic and then screamed. Another made a strangled sound. It was a testament to Toffee's control over their expressions that they only looked pained. Shinjai saw their reactions. "Uh, Star, are you sure that you don't want, like, a crash course in how magic works before you go do this... really difficult thing?"

"Yes, Star," Buff Frog said. "Are you sure you don't need plan?"

"Nah, I've winged it and won before. Look at Toffee. I beat them all on my own, all winging it." She paused. "No hard feelings, right?"

Toffee didn't answer. Their left eye twitched. 

Shinjai did not feel good. She did not want Star to die. She did not want to die. She definitely did not want the universe to die. This had to work. Star had pulled victories out of her – uh, she'd pulled victories from thin air before, right? She had to do this with the universe at stake. She had to.

"Anyways, I better get going," Star said. She turned into her butterfly. "Let's do this."

"Star, wait." It was Toffee.

Star turned back to the phone. "What is it?"

"...be careful." was all they said.

Star nodded. "Pfft, I'm always careful," she said. But neither of them were convinced.

She opened a portal. She flew through it. She entered high enough to see an entire side of the ROM. She looked down.

She gasped.

Chapter Text

Star looked down at the Realm of Magic. Below was the shimmering golden planet, but there was a large, angry, and pulsating dark purple spot around the mountainous area that had helped find her mother.

Star laughed. "From the way everyone was talking, you'd think the whole planet was dead. That's just a teeny spot. It hasn't even reached any magic wells."

Well gee, Star, that sure is lucky. Because if it reached any magic wells, your little planet would be as good as doomed.

She dove down to the spot and inspected it. It was an angry spot, pink on the outside, purple going in, like a bruise. But it differed from a bruise in that the center was absolute nothingness. It wasn't even a color, really. Just... nothing. Where space and time and magic should be was nothing.

Star tried not to think too hard about all that. It was really weird.

"Well, getting to the Magic should be really easy," she reasoned. "If there's only a tiny bit of dark magic, I can avoid it really easily." She tore open a portal to the other side of the magic planet, raised Eclipsa's wand that had reluctantly transformed back into Star's wand, and dove, holding the wand outstretched in front of her. Two other hands and her brain were focused on her notebook, where she was writing Magic, magic, magic, over and over. Toffee had apparently focused on the Whispering Spell and only the Whispering Spell, but Star focused on something that was already there in the ROM anyways, and wouldn't hurt her. Not immediately, anyways. She plunged down, down, into the glowing gold darkness.

This time, the magic didn't try to talk or grab her or anything. It was just... silent. Even when she slipped up and thought about alligators, nothing happened. She dove down, down, and the weight of the magic above her made her ears pop. This wasn't right. The magic wasn't supposed to act like this, right? Magic, magic, magic! Only think about magic!

But as she began to run out of breath, it was painfully clear that something had gone terribly wrong.

Finally she had to give up. She summoned a giant bubble full of oxygen and sat there for a while. But even if the magic wouldn't help her down, she still had to keep going right? She had to! Yeah, she had to. And, hey, she was powerful magically, right? She could just use magic!

"TUNNEL RAINBOW WORMHOLE!" she shouted, and a tunnel with walls made of rainbows stretched before her. It was really unstable, though, as currents of magic shook around her.

So she booked it down, 

down, 

           do wn, 

                       do w n, 

                                      d o w n, 

                                                     o w d n

                                                                     w o d n, 

                                                                                     w o n d, 

                                                                                                       w a n d...

And before she knew it, she was There. She knew immediately that something was wrong, because just looking at it didn't just make her head hurt, it gave her a nosebleed. She stared at the pristine golden/white/black/↮ⰸ⛘ⵕ⮂⢱ⲉ⠎⪱ⷙ of the drops on the crimson-blood-red floor, the faint but persistent and increasing humming in her skull like it was an egg about to hatch and she looked up and saw her tunnel close but before it closed she saw it fill with emptiness.

She had learned about gravity with Mrs. Rongdat, the weird science teacher. She had told them that things with mass are attracted to the center of massive objects, like Earth or Mewni or any large planet-sized object.

The darkness obeys the law of gravity, at least when it's still just purple. And Magic is at the center of this weird mgic planet.

And the dakrness dissolves everyything it touches. It can go right to the core unobstructed.

Sh*t.

Star blanched at the realization, but she had to put a stop to it. She had to stop this. She had to. She had – where was Magic?

Around here was Magic's home – a place of swirling sotorms and crystal cities and stones and frogs in their pools and everything and everything and everything but. No nagic. No Magic. The being itself was wnowhere to be seen.

Seen? Seen?

Seen?

Where was Magic? Where was it?

Where? Wheere was she?

She moved forwards, if that was a fdirection anymore, futher into the lobster pot. She twitched as the buziing humming thrumming in her mind got stronger. Nosebleed was not going away. Not moving on to something else.

She couldn't move on to soemthing else.

She did not know what to do. She didn't know why she couldn't stop moving fogwards. Reasons flahsed in her mind, but they all seemed small in the face of thsi everything.

And nothing.

The nothing was there

, it dripped,

dripped,

dripped into the mind of the things around her, slipping through the walls , water in the face of a dam. (You put up barriesrs You tried to make them stay away But just as no dams last forever, they always happen every time

Nothing comes for everyone in the end)

Star pusehd forewards, so bright and shining and full of stuff that the very atoms of it burned away. She tried to advacne. She tired. But she tripped over a twig, a leg, a death. Seh looked. It was magic. Magic. Magic was wrapped around the walls, barely clinging to life. It was trying to keep the void at bay, away from its home, but nothing could keep it out now.

"¡Magic!" Star shouted. "¡I'm here to give you back!"

"ⵃⰜ⽣Ⲝ⨔⑥⊛⊾⊖⌚Ⱞ⡷➍," it said, and it was not unhappy.

"I don't know what you're sying!" Star said. "I'm just here to give you back to Glossaryck!"

Glossaryck? Glossaryck! What does she say? Can she not be serious?

i want to get out. i cant live like this. he is (make it stop) make it end please. i want to go home.

death i will die i want to leave to join a new part of my whole is this what it feels like mother i want to go home

where are my arms? where are my legs? where is my voice?

None of it was communicated with words or gestures or semlls but Star knew, knew what the spirit was going through. "Glossaryck is tyour current owner. He's the one who neglected you," she realized. "That... why is that not a spurprise? I should be devastated, but... it just seems so typical. He doesn't care. He doesn't do anything to help. And it's left the universe in ruins!"

He does not have some grand plan, the universe replied. He's just making it up as he does along, just like the rest of us.

"So what do I do now?" Star asekd. "What do I do to help you?"

"Mysterious essence is the cohesion of observable experience."

"Ohkay... Can't you do the thing, wherew you analyze my thoughts and feelings and re-learn how to speak English?"

"AL WART. BOOT AVIS BIDE."

"Okay." Star waited for clarification or connection, but none came. So she looked up. At the top of the building, and around the walls, the Magic was curled, protecting this place. The place where Magic was created, flowing in from... somewhere. Sometwehre... else. Magic protected it, using its body to shield it from the rain of nothingness coming down from all sides. And then in a moment of empathy only felt due to her connection with the creature, Star realized how much that must hiurt.

And Star really only dealt in pain.

"You shouldn't have to do this. How do I make it stop.?"

Magic screamed. "A sickingly prodigious profile set a treehouse on fire. Another day is a stroytellyr without equal. Nothingless revels in authority –"

And then all was screaming for a moment.

"Hey! Ehey, I'm trying to help you! Stay with me! Stay with me!"

The magic didn't didn't listen. The magic didn't hear. It lived it lived it lived and all was pain.

"Hey! Hey!" Star shouted. "PLease, listen to me!"

Magic twisted in on itself, spiraling into a whrilwind of pain and all-encomapsing skin and scales. 

Then, a moment of clarity in the tempest: "Why don't you speak my language? I can't – there are so many things I can't explain in your tongues."

A pause, in which Star was spat out of the storm, falling down and sinking in a strange sludgy liquid that she tried hard not to think of as pus. She tried to summon her butterfly, but it would not come. "Why can't we talk in Mewman? I can ttotally do it in Mewman."

Blazing fire exploded around her. Star screamed and tried to swim through the liquid ooze away from the fire. "THEN TELL ME WHAT THE WORD FOR X⽁⚊⵪⺞⋋⟶⺡❑ⵯ◴⋤⒏⸟⎈╴ IN YOUR LANGUAGE IS! TELL ME HOW TO SAY ◛ⓡ⾔♳⯜ⵣ␌␋⨢₯⬒⨝⳿◹⢁⊕ IN YOUR MORTAL MOUTH WITHOUT FLAYING YOUR MIND AND TONGUE ALIKE! BY THE END OF MY PAIN, YOU CANNOT EVEN SPEAK CAPITAL LETTERS! YOU ARE JUST A CHILD. COME BACK WHEN YOU"VE SEEN MY WHOLE AND LIVED. COME BACK WHEN YOU HAVE SPENT A LIFE DEDICATED TO MY ART AND PERHAPS THE WORDS YOU MUST SPEAK TO HEAL THIS WORLD WILL BE INSIDE THE MIND THAT YOU HAVE HONED TO THE SHARPNESS OF A SURGEON"S SCALPEL. PERHAPS THAT KNIFE WILL BE THE ONE TO CUT OUT THIS CANCER."

Star gasperd and doubled over. He nosebleed was only getitng owrhse q.And it wasn't just the nosebleeds waht was sheaking her. The spirit's owrkds cut through het like dull k iveves. Her mind was a delicate machine and the spirtit was stripping the scrwsss and jamming thew gears. The area was spreadlike water, but all tas not calm. She was winding out. "PLease ... i'll do everything I can. Just... get me out of here."

The Magic stopped. It stopped, and retreated, subdued. Then: "I am going home. My mother could bear this pain, but I cannot. I will close the door behind me. You have [ⲁ⬞⇸⒁≘⧇⋾☋⅃⠚] until you need open it again. You must open the door yourself, and only when you can truly speak to me. Until then, you must face the nothing on your own. Goodbye."

And the Magic was gone.  

Star only had a few seconds. She quickly cast the protective spell Glossaryck had taught her as the N̸o̴t̵h̴i̵n̷g̴n̸e̴s̴s̸ flooded in the hole the Magic had left behind. And it had been in a perfect circle around the center of the Realm of Magic, so now it was in every direction she turned. She cast her tunnel spell, but it did nothing. She would have to go through it. She summoned her butterfly – it worked this time, thank Gloss – the Forces of Evil – and she flew upwards as fast as she could go.

She hit the dark magic flood and it was cold, colder than she expected. From the angry pink of the magic around its infection, she'd thought it would be hot. But it was an empty, absent chill. She forced her way through it, but it was a void, and it was rapidly chipping away at her shield.

She flapped her wings despite the freezing chill flooding her.

Maybe it made sense that the N̸o̴t̵h̴i̵n̷g̴n̸e̴s̴s̸ was cold. The patterns it formed were like fractals, right? Weird, veiny fractals. Fractals, like snowflakes. Black frost ate away at her shield, and she found that she couldn't form a new one. She saw the shield fail around the edge of her wings and felt as it dug its cold frost into them. 

She flapped harder, but it felt like the N̸o̴t̵h̴i̵n̷g̴n̸e̴s̴s̸ never ended. Did it? Did it not end, ever? Had everything been consumed? Did the concept of distance even mean anything inside something like this?

She was succumbing to it, she could tell. Soon she would be N̸o̴t̵h̴i̵n̷g̴ just like everything else. Was she even something now?

And then, the only thing in front of her was a glittering blue thread. She stretched out her arms – she had arms! – and grabbed it, and suddenly she was above the infection in the thick golden magic of the ROM.

"Yes!" she shouted, and magic filled her mouth. She coughed, and then thought hard about breathable air. A pocket of air appeared, and she formed a bubble with it and sighed in relief. She then took inventory. Her wings were a little tattered, but thankfully the N̸o̴t̵h̴i̵n̷g̴ wasn't spreading from them – they'd only been damaged by pure nothingness, not the dark purple magic that produced and spread it.

Her arms, legs, and other body parts were fine, for now. She didn't even have a nosebleed. Except the tips of her hair and horns, which had been burned away. Freezerburned away, heh. She would have to fix that later. But she was alive! She flopped out of her butterfly and collapsed against the walls of her bubble, stretching it into an oval as she laid down. Maybe she could snooze here, just take a nap. Wouldn't that be nic –

From the depths, a single vein of dark purple shot up and sliced through Star's ankle. She screamed, and the bubble popped. She tore her foot away, but that only spread the plague farther. She gasped for air, but she only got gold magic, and her scattered mind couldn't think to properly turn it into air. All that she could think of was pain , as the pain signals finally reached her brain and blossomed into a horrible stabbing garden.

She flailed away from the dark magic vein, and finally realized she was suffocating. She couldn't think, the pain stopped her and the magic pressed in on her, dark and slimy and filling her lungs. She coughed and retched, but without air there was no way to cough anything out. 

Panic and pain can indeed give you a boost, it's true. Those two can help your brain fall along natural tracks, using instinct and impulse to allow you to act quickly. 

But miles below the surface, in severe pain, and struggling to breathe, much less cast a spell, the lack of quick thinking that panic and pain brought worked to seal Star's fate. With the pain, she couldn't think clearly enough to turn the magic she was drowning in to air, and she couldn't calm down enough thanks to her drowning response. Deep breaths weren't exactly an option here.

And drowning happens sooner than you think. She had little air to begin with, but she lost it very quickly. Her monkey brain soon noticed the rising carbon dioxide in her blood and demanded she breathe.

So she did. 

In terms of drowning, magic was not much different than water. And Star had only drowned in one of those before. So it was a strangely comforting feeling, to be embraced by the thick, viscous liquid around her. Far too familiar.

Black spots swam in her vision, and she couldn't tell which way was up anymore. But in this darkness, she saw the magic faintly glowing around her.

Sorry about this, Marcie, Shinjai, everyone... I couldn't do it this time.

Above her, a unicorn galloped downwards, and stopped with her head nearly touching Star's. Firstborn?

She was Firstborn, but she looked hollow and sickly. "I'm sorry," she said in her voice, which was still as musical as it had been. "You must leave."

A flash of teal-white magic, and Star was gone.

There was soft dirt beneath her. Rocky, but still soft. Rain was gently falling, soaking her dress and drumming on her skin. Star welcomed it. Marcie had read her part of her textbooks, and they had mentioned that even if you got out of the thing you were drowning in, you could still die without help. And there sure was no help... wherever she was. But there were tree roots and nice rain and soft dirt and after the N̷o̶t̸h̶i̷n̵g̸n̸e̸s̵s̸ of the ROM, she was happy if she died here. 

Her eyes began to close. She faintly saw a tall figure stepping into view. She meant to say "Haha, how's the weather up there, sport?" but all that came out was gurgles.

Her eyes closed, and the world was no more.

Chapter Text

You wake up in a hospital. Or, it looks like a hospital. You've seen a lot of hospitals by now, and the area around you looks very much like one of them. There's the uncomfortable hospital bed, a byproduct of all the settings designed to move it to your medical needs. There's vital sign monitors, heartbeat and breathing and blood pressure. Someone stuck an IV in your arm too. You look at the stuff they're feeding you, and note that it's in an odd papery plastic bag, and that the labels are in a weird language you can't read. But on them is a note, in Mewman: DEXTROSE (SUGAR), NUTRIENTS, AND STRONG PAINKILLER. Painkiller? Why a painkiller?

And then the pain starts. Ow! Even with the slight numbing of the painkiller, your entire left leg feels like it's on fire. And you're positioned so weirdly, too. Aren't injured legs supposed to be elevated? Or at least infected ones. But yours is bent at the knee, pointed down. You look at it. You have to lift it up a lot to look at it, which is weird, too. It's that lowered. And it's... in an extremely padded and sealed cast, with warning signs in several languages and types. Like it's some kind of... biohazard. You've only seen that when Dr. Williams finished a surgery on your mom and removed the dark magic from her skin. Apparently it was extremely toxic, and they had to toss it in the void to stop it from spreading. 

You are definitely not going to open the cast. You aren't that stupid. So you put your leg back in the strange position it was in and lie back. Above you is solid white stone for a ceiling. Maybe marble. Which is weird, because this is a hospital. The white is fine, you want to see the dirt so you can clean it in a hospital. But marble? Wasn't that expensive? Oh, whatever. Knowing the unicorn's magic, you probably ended up in a strange dimension where marble is everywhere, or the multiverse's most well-funded hospital. Careful not to dislodge anything, you sit up. You're in a hospital gown, you note, and you're already really hungry. Ugh, how long were you out?

The curtains around your bed are drawn, so you press the button on your control pad that has the image of curtains retracting. You don't move to open them yourself, even if it would be way faster; you know the drill in a hospital: you move as little as possible until you can talk to a doctor.

You immediately notice the wolf person. They are sitting near you, and looking at you. They wear simple, practical dark clothing, and a shaped stone belt with a crystal at the front. There is a stone knife lying on the floor beside them. It does not look surgical. You meet their green eyes, and you flinch slightly. There is nothing about them that should be a problem to you, a princess with magic powers, but they're still unsettling. 

Also, they have a knife nearby and are a strange monster in a strange place and your leg is really, really injured. It really, really hurts. You have a right to be on edge. 

"Well. You're awake," they say.

You nod. "I'm awake."

"How do you feel?" they ask. 

You wince. It's okay to not be okay in a hospital, but... "I don't know. How am I supposed to feel?"

"Like you've smashed leg-first into a mountain," they say. "You're supposed to feel awful. We're doing our best to keep that dark magic from spreading, but I'd imagine it's painful."

"Yeah..." you say dully. "It really hurts. I feel like I should be screaming now. Why aren't I screaming?"

"That's a perfectly normal reaction. Some people scream when they're in pain, but a lot of people shut down. Both are fine. Screaming and panicking help us know there's a problem, but it's much easier to work with a patient who's shut down."

"Huh." You don't know what else to say. They clearly are some kind of doctor, though they don't wear the clothes of one, just a heavy black coat and dress. Then you realize. "Where... where's the wand? Eclipsa trusted me with it... it's a... it's a circle, with butterfly wings, with a stick coming out – you know, a –"

"It's safe. We put it in the hazardous materials section," the wolf person said. "It's in a heavily warded room, and shouldn't be dangerous. It still produces enough magical energy to power the entirety of this hospital, so it's fine. We'll all be a little more magical for it. I didn't want to put it near your leg, though. That would spread your corruption further."

You are confused. "What?"

"It's safe. That's the important part."

"Anyways, I'd better let everyone know you're awake." They get up. You watch them leave and feel awfully alone. You want to have someone to talk to, to distract you from the pain in your leg. Which really hurts. You still feel like you should be screaming.

You lie back down and further look around. There are other people in the hospital bay, you realize. The one to your right has their curtains closed, but the one to the left has them open, and are lying with their back to you. They don't look like any monster you know about, unlike the wolf person. They appear to have both feathers and a cat's tail. 

"Hey!" you whisper-shout in their direction. "Hey! You want to talk to me? I want to talk to someone! Hey!" You don't hear your voice getting louder, but it does. 

They groan, and turn to face the ceiling, reaching for their pillow to stop the sound of your voice. Then they seem to realize something, eyes flying open and mouth opening. They bolt upright, whirling around to stare at you, and then say something in a language you don't understand. Their face is somewhere between an owl and a cat in structure, having a small, sharp beak and pointed ears. 

You wave and say hi. They yelp and flinch away, curling into a bristling ball, and thanks to a lifetime of avoiding eye contact you realize they are staring not at your eyes, but at your cheekmarks. You touch them. Why are they so afraid of you?

Well, of course. The obvious answer is your magic. Even the wolf person's knife probably couldn't do much about that. 

And they are monsters. But if the cat/bird person won't talk to you, there's not much to do while you wait for "everyone" to know that you've woken up. You look around, but yeah, there really isn't anything to do. You can't even read the language on the signs on the magnetic board near you, and you don't want to do magic with the literal scaredy cat right there. So you sit back and study the patterns in the ceiling. The pain comes and goes, and studying the patterns on the ceiling does nothing to change it.

You've just finished outlining a laser puppy with nothing but your mind when the door at the end of the hospital bay opens, and a group of doctors, led by the wolf person, come in. The wolf person is now in more doctor-like apparel, and is talking directly to a tall blue lizard woman. You think at first that they're talking in Septatian, but as they get closer, you realize you can understand them perfectly.

"Look, I'm wasting all my magic on saving her sorry butt. If it were up to me, we'd have tossed her into the void and been done with it," the lizard woman says.

"Well, good thing it's not up to you, then," the wolf man retorts. "We need her alive, thank you very much. And I'm not going to just not save her life. That's not what I want to be. If you aren't going to be helpful, you can leave."

A sigh. "Fine. I'll shut up."

"Please do, this conversation is getting tiring."

They arrive at your bed. One of the doctors, a small, shy frog, steps forwards. "Hello... I am Doctor Vasiliev, he/hem. I am here to speak to you about your options."

"About my leg?" you ask. "About the weird dark magic that's currently eating it?"

"Yes," he says. "I'm afraid that, barring a miracle, the only option is... amputation. The dark magic, it's not just on your skin, it has severed through your entire foot, and –"

You nod. You'd been expecting that. "Okay. Chop off my leg."

"What... this is a massive decision, ma'am, you need to have at least a few days to think about it, we need to prepare, you –"

"Nope, I've thought about it. I don't really have any other choice. Either the dark magic goes away on its own, which I don't think will happen, or I leave it on and it spreads and I die. Then you guys either die or toss my lifeless body into the void. Not great options! I'll just chop it off and live! I don't think that's a hard decision. Now do it fast."

Dr. Vasiliev sighs. "Okay, but we'll have to have your informed consent. You need to know what an amputation involves and what your life will be like afterwards."

"Okay, so tell me."

"That's the problem..." Dr. Vasiliev says, looking embarrassed. The wolf person raises their eyebrows, with a knowing look. "I cannot tell you. I am... not trained in Mewman physiology."

"What?" you ask. What the heck did that mean?

"It means he doesn't know how your body works," the wolf person says. "He's never actually worked with Mewmans before. I said a Mewman-accommodating hospital this deep in the Mountains was a bad idea, but the council refused to listen to me. This isn't even our first disaster."

"I think you of all people would know the value of hope," Dr. Vasiliev mutters. 

"The fact remains, though, that no one here knows how to perform your amputation."

"Except you," the tall blue lizard woman says. "You could probably do it." She smiles, showing sharp teeth.

"She doesn't want that," the wolf person says.

"Why not?" you and the lizard woman say at the same time. 

"Hehe, jinx," you say, and the lizard woman rolls her eyes. "No but seriously, why not?" you continue. "I want this leg off as soon as possible, before I die. So chop it off. What's the other options?"

"We could get a doctor from another hospital –"

"The only doctors within a thousand miles are even worse than the doctors here," the lizard woman says, with an amused smile. 

"We could open up portal capabilities –"

"And have Hekapoo down on our heads before we can blink? We are not doing that."

"Maybe the tunnels –"

"The tunnels really hate Star. They've let her pass when they want something from her, but... I don't think they'd bother to help save her life."

"Or we could shorten travel times –"

"You've seen the scouting parties that Solarian Warrior sends. Killed a couple, too. We are not lowering any of our defenses for this princess, and I'm sure pretty most everyone agrees with me."

There were mutters of ascent from the other doctors. 

"Shorten travel times?" you ask. 

"The Mountains of Incurable Anguish are deliberately a chore to walk through. Distances are longer than they should be," the wolf person says. They wave that away, though. "I don't think that's important, though. We need someone to perform the surgery –"

"'Someone' will be you," the lizard woman replies.

"Yeah, I'm with the lady who wants to throw me in the void," you say. "I really don't see why you can't perform the surgery... Toffee."

Toffee narrows their eyes. "What gave it away?"

"Well, it was kinda obvious," you say, and it was, really. "But... it was your eyes. Monsters don't have green eyes."

Toffee smiles, melting back into their lizard form. "The one thing I can't change."

"But, yeah, informed consent. And you've informed me, so I consent. Anything else before we chop-chop my leg?"

"Okay." A sigh of relief sweeps through the doctors. "But..." they turn to the blue lizard woman, "you'll have to be my anesthesiologist."

She groans. "Really? I'd probably just kill her. Wouldn't be difficult, and it might even be worth it."

"You're the least likely to accidentally give her something toxic, or perform a spell Glossaryck won't like. She's magically strong as is." There is a round of agreement from the other doctors. One is reading what looks like a temperature monitor by her bed, and poking the doctor next to her. The other doctor looks at the monitor, and their eyes nearly poke out of their skull.

You focus on the conversation. Right now, you're not really sure what would be worse, being treated by Miss "Wouldn't be difficult" over here, or leaving the leg on.

"I'd probably give her carbon monoxide accidentally," one of the doctors, a sizeshifter, says. 

"That's toxic to Mewmans?" another doctor asks.

"Yes," Toffee is saying. "Very toxic."

As if to accentuate the point, your leg twinges, and you add your voice to the Pro Scary Lady Anesthesiologist camp.

"Just not used to Mewmans," a bird says. "My specialty is Reptiliforms, not fricking... whatever Mewmans are."

"Well, they are invading aliens," the anesthesiologist says. "It makes sense you wouldn't know what to do with them."

Okay, that's mean. But... true, from the history I've gathered.

"So let the normal folk who don't know how to help aliens be and help me treat her," Toffee says. " Without killing her."

"Fine," the anesthesiologist says. "But you deal with the post-anesthesia babbling nonsense."

"I thought you enjoyed that part."

"Normally, yes, but not if it's her."

"So what I'm hearing is I'm gonna have to work extra hard to get you to like me," you say, grinning a deliberately annoying grin. 

She groans. "Let's get this over with so I can knock her out already. I'm going to see if we have anything that doesn't have carbon monoxide or lead. Fricking Glossaryck is such a pain for making his invasive species immune to Sleeping Stasis Spell. Peace." She leaves. Watching her go, you suspect she is moving faster than strictly necessary. Either that or she just has long legs. She is very tall. 

With her disappearance, everyone seems to be speaking in Septarian again. Toffee says a few hushed words, and the other doctors file out after her. Toffee sits in the chair, next to you. "I'm going to walk you through life without a leg, and you will listen," they say, in Mewman. "But there's one thing you have to know right now: with an injury this traumatic, you will probably still be in pain after the amputation. You may be in pain your entire life."

"What?" you ask. "My legs will be gone. You mean pain on the amputation scar?"

"Have you heard of phantom pain?"

You shake your head. Your leg twinges. Gosh it is hard to think clearly. "Uh... no."

"Well, when the nerves in your leg are damaged, they send signals to your brain that make you feel pain. When your leg is amputated, the brain never gets the signal to stop, but it does get the signal that something is wrong with your nerves, that they've been severed. Your brain gets confused, and then decides to be extremely irritating. It sends the body's default signal that something's not right: pain."

You groan. "Come on! I was trying to save the world! You know that. I was doing the right thing. But, uh... you probably want to know what happened, right?"

"We'll talk about that later." You smile at that. Then they have to ruin it: "Once the threat to this facility and the mountains is contained."

"Okay. Can I emphasize how unfair this is? It's so unfair!"

Toffee shrugs. "I don't know, I can't help but remember you blasting off my arm the first time we met. Maybe this is the universe's version of comeuppance."

Somewhere else, the anesthesiologist smiled.

"That was different. You kidnapped Marcie, and you weren't doing anything world-saving then," you say, and Toffee makes a weird face. "But ugh. Is there anything else I have to know? I'm not changing my mind. I'll be in pain either way, and this way I'll be less dead."

"Yes."

And Toffee explains what losing a leg was really like, and what to expect. There will be residual limb pain at the site of amputation, and there will be lots of learning and adjusting. Things will be very weird for a long time. You'll use a wheelchair or crutches until you're ready for a prosthetic leg, which will be above-the-knee, but we have a spell to move the knee whenever you need it moved. No, you should probably not do sick wheelies while you're still getting used to the wheelchair. Afterwards, it's your funeral. Please don't rocket down steep hills when Toffee can see you. But yes, you can "accidentally" run people over. As long as it can conceivably be viewed as an accident, which will be easy because the average person knows nothing about wheelchairs. Which is another thing, ableism exists and is bad. People will stare at you. People will try way too hard not to stare at you. People will treat you differently, often disrespectfully, both intentionally and unintentionally. It will be very, very hard. 

"Better than dying," you said. 

Toffee doesn't say anything. But you know you're both thinking it: Yes. But what use is that?

"Anyways, how do you know about all this? It seems... I don't know, a little..."

"Personal?" Toffee shrugs, and snaps their fingers. The face Star was used to disappears, revealing a massive burn scar across the right side of their face, covering their cheek and nicking their eyebrow, pulling their face into a slight frown. Where the burn scar covered their key-shaped cheekmark, it was a dark, burn black. "I survived, but... it's difficult, to be visibly different from everyone else. People treat you differently. And of course, it makes blending in difficult. I take the illusion off at home, but I've learned that if you want something from someone, you have to pretend you're just like them. And even at home... Septarsis is good, but far from perfect. And my scar is just another painful reminder of everything we've lost."

You stare at your leg, tears threatening your eyes. You nod, then shake your head. "None of this is fair. It's just not fair!"

"Nothing is fair," Toffee says. "That's something you'll have to learn eventually. The childish idea that everyone gets what they deserve is completely wrong. The only justice in this world is that which we make ourselves."

You smile. "Well... maybe you can help me with that when I get out of here."

Toffee shrugs. "Maybe."

"Alright, I've finally found something," the anesthesiologist said, coming out of nowhere. You yelp. She really did come out of nowhere; one moment there was nothing, and then the next there was the anesthesiologist, dressed in scrubs and holding an IV bag. "Does propofol work?"

"I don't know, I only know it won't kill her right away," Toffee said. "I don't know everything, and you're supposed to be the expert."

Propofol... you know that name... where did you hear it? Oh! When Moon was undergoing her second surgery. The attending physician, that guy named Dr. Grunt Johanson, told you that the anesthesia you'd asked about was mostly propofol, with a few heavy-duty painkillers, because she was hurt very badly, and even the Butterfly's peculiar fast healing wasn't enough to take away so much pain. 

"Propofol works, I think!" you say. "I think. Yeah, it works."

The anesthesiologist frowns, and looks slightly to the left of the IV bag. She stays frozen like that for just long enough to be noticeable, and then nods. "She's right. Yeah, propofol works. Give me an hour to get ready, and we'll have that surgery. Hopefully we'll be able to wash our hands of this evil, all-consuming plague, and her leg."

You're confused. What? Then, realization. "Hey! That's mean."

"Yes, that is the point," the anesthesiologist says, and moves to leave. "Now, Toffee, please hurry up. I'm burning through magic fast."

"Just ignore her," Toffee says. "You're safe; she won't lay a finger on you while I'm there to be disapproving. She just doesn't like you."

"Can't see why. I've never even met her..." you mutter. Then, a realization. "Is it because of the weird spell I did that blasted you? 'Cause a lot of people are mad about that."

"...among other things," Toffee says. "But she has met you. You just haven't met her."

"That makes no sense," you say. You worry about that, though. These people are illusionists, you remind yourself. They could've met you anytime, anywhere, and you wouldn't know it.

"But.. is there anything else you want to know?" Toffee prompts.

You shrug. "Is... uh, is Shinjai around here? And Marcie, and my parents, do they know where I am?"

Toffee nods. "Shinjai is currently traveling back from our trip into Mewman lands that are connected to mirror service. She'll be here soon. I let Marcie know that you're safe for now, and to please not go looking for you. If I judge her correctly, she's already heading for the Mountains."

You laugh. "That does sound like Marcie. Though she's probably got an excellent plan ready. I'd be careful. If there's anyone who can out-plot you, it's Marcie."

Toffee snorts. "I'll take my chances."

You talk for a while after that. It feels so strange, chatting with your mortal enemy. Someone you're supposed to hate, because of stupid magical destiny or whatever. But you... are getting along. Toffee is strange to idly chat with. They never drop the formality, but you find that that just makes them a more interesting person to talk to. They talk you through the procedure, noting your vitals and your medical history in Septarian on a weird magical stone plate. But they also let you go on whatever tangents you want. You find yourself spilling your entire time on Earth to them.

You're just talking about the Great Raspberry Train Tracks Incident, when the anesthesiologist kicks open the door, scaring everyone in the hospital bay. "Li't'chét! Stop kicking doors!" Toffee shouts.

"Yeah, whatever," the anesthesiologist says. "I'm ready, and that kid had better be ready too. Just having that dark magic near you guys is freaking me out."

"And I thought you weren't concerned about the dark magic," Toffee retorts.

"I'm not worried about it because we have the means to stop it. Doesn't mean we should be rubbing our faces in it."

You frown. "Uh... what?"

"Let's do the surgery, you poor excuse for a ball of slime."

"Yes, why don't we," Toffee says, getting up. Some orderlies, who you hadn't noticed behind the rather attention-grabbing anesthesiologist, come around, carrying a gurney. You sit up as they carefully guide you onto it, moving the already mobile IV bags.

"Some of our doctors and students will observe, if that's alright with you. We've never actually had a Mewman here before, and your surgery will be very educational if we ever get another."

You nod. 

"I'd like your written consent, if that's alright," Toffee says, and an orderly produces a clipboard. You sign it, noticing it's mostly in Mewman, though there's a few hasty translation errors. You also notice the clipboard itself is entirely made of thin stone, even the clipper-thingy. Lots of stone around here.

You travel through the hospital as Toffee talks with the orderlies. You think it's in Septarian, but you can understand it, so it must not be. Everyone stares as you pass them. Not only are you a Mewman, you're the princess. Or, well, ex-princess. You wonder if you should think of it as practice.

You reach the operating room and the anesthesiologist changes the IV bag and puts an oxygen mask on you. "Okay, Lanternfly. Think about, I don't know, the weird mini narwhals you shoot out of your wand that die in pain after they've hit your target because they're not in the ocean. Count their bloated, decaying bodies."

" What ?"

"I said what I –"

You're in a room. Not the operating room, or any of the other rooms you've been in, but you must admit that it looks very similar to the hospital bay. Though... the beds are more comfortable, and there's a fire behind a containment spell shedding warmth. You've got way more stuff sticking off you, though. There's a blood pressure detector, a heart rate monitor, a weird thing around your finger... and... "Wait... what?" You stare around the room. "What happened? I was in the operating room thingy... but I'm not now? Whoa... you guys can teleport?" You giggle, and poke the blood pressure monitor. "Hehe. Wow."

"Your surgery is done," Toffee says, sitting by your bed. "How do you feel?"

"No way my surgery is done!" you say. You were just in there! You were just in the operating room, and now you're not? "It makes way more sense that you can teleport. Wow, Septarian magic is so cool! How do I learn how to do that?"

"It's a secret," they say. "But look, your leg is gone."

You look down at your leg. It's in a cast. "No way. You teleported away my leg? I gotta learn your secrets."

"How's she doing?" the anesthesiologist says, walking in. Behind her, two interns are staring at them and you, muttering about Mewmans having such weirdly large arteries. 

"I thought you didn't want to see her like this," Toffee says. 

She shrugs, and leans her arm on their head, bending down slightly. "I wanted to see you."

"Aw..." you say, and then you gasp. "Why are you so sparkly..."

The anesthesiologist groans, and turns to leave. "Yep, I'm out. It's not endearing when it's her."

"Wait!" you shout. Hopefully it'll give you long enough for her to hear your important message: "You're so sparkly... that means you're... you're... very important."

"Don't we know it. Bet you're not sparkly. Goodbye." And the anesthesiologist leaves. 

"Don't listen to her," Toffee says, as you look at yourself. "I bet you're plenty sparkly."

You sniffle, and start crying. "I'm not! I'm not sparkly!" You look at them. "But... but you are! You're so sparkly!"

"Sparkles are overrated."

"I HEARD THAT!" shouts the anesthesiologist from the hallway. Toffee rolls their eyes. 

"In any case, I'll want to monitor you for another hour. It was a pretty long surgery –"

"No, you teleported me. I was in the surgery room, and now I'm not. I was teleported."

Toffee sighs, and points out the window. Outside, it's evening. A sundial even sits on the mossy courtyard. It shows that, yep, it's evening.

You think. You're pretty sure it was just noon when you arrived in the operating room. "What... you teleported me through TIME? I thought only Father Time or Omnitraxus or that weird giraffe guy could do that!"

"Skywynne had a spell for that, if I recall correctly," Toffee says. "And massive places like black holes can do that too, but only forwards."

"Black holes?" you ask. "I've never been inside a black hole..."

"Good. I don't want you to die."

"You don't?"

"No. Not at all."

You start bawling. Real tears flow down your face, in huge anime rivulets.

The anesthesiologist dashes into the room, claws skittering on the smooth stone ground. "What's going on?"

"They're EVIL! They're SU – SUPPOSED TO BE EVIL!" you scream. "IT'S NOT FAIR!"

"Oh, this again," the anesthesiologist says, but she doesn't leave. She... pulls out popcorn.

You don't really notice. You're too upset. You bolt upright. "I thought – I thought I'd be... I thought my stupid destiny was to – to fight evil! A big old evil! B – but you're not evil!" You try to stand up, out of the bed, forgetting entirely that you don't have a left leg anymore. Toffee runs faster than you thought possible to catch you. "I don't want to kill you," you sob, burying your face in their chest.

Toffee internally thanks whatever god will listen that they haven't changed out of the scrubs. They then chastise themself for thinking that, because they are the type to do that, as if fashion isn't a reasonable concern. "Hey. I don't think you will," they eventually say.

"What?" you ask, looking up at them.

"I don't think you'll kill me. There are a lot of other ways to die than... being killed." They help you back onto the bed. "You really should rest. You're still being monitored. How does your leg feel?"

You shift around. "Hehe. I've got a stump!" You get up and poke your stump. "It doesn't hurt! Not at all!" You move to poke it again, but Toffee stops you.

"Good. That means the painkillers are working. Now don't mess with the cast and lie down, or I'll glue you to the bed."

"Ooh, I would love to see that," the anesthesiologist says, and, done with her popcorn, eats the box it came in too.

You stick out your tongue at her. Serves her right.

You lie down. You lie down for quite a while. The anesthesiologist leaves, though you catch her somehow downloading your vitals onto a phone and monitoring them from a safe distance. You're mostly really bored, though, especially as the anesthesia high fades.

Toffee tries to keep you entertained, sending an orderly to get you a coloring book from the pediatrics wing, since everything more complicated is in Septarian. You stare at the blocked out coloring page of a flower with five petals, and put your odd coloring pencil/crayon hybrid to the paper. Then you pull your hand back. "What flower is this?" you finally ask. You don't know what it should look like. 

"Cíaxoch," Toffee says... wistfully? "It's a vine, native to these mountains, but it appears in the Forest of Certain Death too. The flowers are yellow."

You narrow your eyes at them. "Why'd you get all mushy?"

Toffee narrows their eyes right back. "I did not!"

"Wow, you spoke with an exclamation point! You must be mushy!"

Toffee sighs. "Fine. Cíaxoch was my daughter. She is... no longer here."

"Oh," you say. "Okay."

You're quiet for a while after that. 

Finally, the anesthesiologist okays you to end your bedrest. You get excited, and nearly get out of bed without a leg once again. Toffee has a better plan, of course: a wheelchair.

Still a little high off from the anesthesia, you grin. "I have a way better idea." You concentrate, and summon your butterfly. It appears! Your leg remains in your cast, but the rest of you is still your –

A spear, at your throat. Toffee is pointing a strange white spear at you, a fearful expression on their face. The anesthesiologist is there too, claws and teeth sharpened and bared. Everyone else in the room cowers.

Toffee takes a deep breath and the spear disassembles into gray stone vines and a single white crystal sharpened to a point, and wraps around their waist. "Sorry. Reflex." they say.

The anesthesiologist does not back down or relax. She's still in a fighting position. Her claws and teeth are long, maybe even longer than they were a second ago. "Put those wings away, Lanternfly, or I will tear them off myself."

You put your hands up and sit down on the bed, folding your wings to their normal size, which you finally notice is much larger than they had been. They reach your waist now. "S – sorry... uh. I... right. I'll use the wheelchair."

Toffee teaches you how to push it along, and you're off, moving so fast Toffee has to move quickly to keep up with you. You get to the door, but stop there. The hospital is enormous, and you don't know where to go. You don't know what you want to do.

"What... what do I do now?"

"How about dinner?" Toffee asks. "Cafeteria's open."

Your stomach rumbles. "Yeah, that sounds awesome."

You go in, and... wow. The cafeteria is a garden, in another courtyard. There are actual trees in the room, most of them fruit and nut trees, and cooks are actually harvesting from them and then walking back into the kitchen. "This is really cool," you decide, not sure if there's any other way it could be. There are thankfully paved roads inside. 

The cafeteria has surprisingly good food, for a range of options. You're sure that it'll be like the school cafeteria, but this one at least hasn't yet lost its magic. You try to avoid the bugs.

Toffee holds your plate for you, though. You're not at the point where you can wheel with one hand, or even balance a plate on your lap, thanks to the majority of your leg being gone.

You both sit at a table that's already mostly full. The tables are very long, so it feels like half the hospital, the anesthesiologist among them, are staring at you as you wheel to the end of the table and get your plate from Toffee. The bird-cat from earlier is there, as is Dr. Vasiliev. The rest you don't recognize.

A cough, from a tall, gaunt septarian near you. "Una, uh... it's good to... can you... I'm very hungry, but..."

Toffee nods, and they move their plate over. They delicately take a portion of the septarian's food, and take a bite. They think for a moment, and nod. "No caffeine, gluten, or other poison. This food is safe for you."

The septarian looks relieved, and takes their plate back and starts bolting down their food. 

You frown. "Uh... what was that about?"

Toffee sighs. The septarian, in between a bite of food, motions for them to speak. 

"Tala was tortured in Saint Olga's Reform School, a long time before your recent escapades. Saint Olga in those times was attempting to force monsters to form an immunity to foods they couldn't naturally eat, to make them proper civilized Mewmans, and as such slipped all kinds of toxins into her meals. I taste the food for them, to make sure it's not contaminated."

"Oh," you say, pushing your food around. "Sorry."

"Thank you for destroying that horrible place," Tala says quietly.

"Oh... that was mostly Marcie. And Meteora," you say, also quietly.

Everyone eats in silence a little for a few minutes after that, until the bird-cat and the anesthesiologist interrupt by throwing dumb jokes at each other. You smile and laugh, but it all feels hollow. A lot of them you don't get, and often you only laugh because everyone else is laughing. Finally, you finish dinner and wheel away, plate on your lap. Toffee gets up and follows you.

You end up on one of the balconies, overlooking the mountains. Overlooking the armored shells of five Solarian warriors. One is covered in soulflower vines. Another is collapsed, with no visible injury. Most striking are the two impaled on each other's blades, their fires still burning bright. And last but definitely not least was the warrior floating, visor worn away, with black eyes. They are only tethered to the ground by a thin loop of soulflower vines around one foot. The setting sun paints the scene in red-orange fire.

Toffee stands next to you, and looks out on them.

You finally speak. "What... happened here?"

"Queen Solaria sent six of her finest warriors to capture me. Instead they found this hospital, and tried to destroy it. They... did not succeed."

"Because of you."

"Yes."

You swallow. "But... surely... you're smart, you could have reasoned with them. I'm sure they didn't actually want to destroy the hospital."

Toffee shook their head. "They wouldn't have lasted as Solarian warriors as long as they did if they thought monsters were people. A Solarian warrior who does not believe completely in their cause will burn out eventually. These lasted twenty years. Only about a hundred out of thousands lasted that long."

"But... they were good people. Solarian warriors... they just wanted to serve their queen. I'm sure they had families, and people they cared about –"

"Maybe they did once. But not anymore." Toffee sits down, tail curling towards your wheelchair. You look at them, staring out at the view. They are so sure they did the right thing. Maybe that is the dangerous thing. After all... what Solaria did, that was a long time ago. Maybe they were hung up on the past. You shouldn't judge someone for what their ancestors did. Even if the Solarian warriors were bad, that didn't make...

Toffee snorts. "I know what you're thinking."

A bolt of panic runs through you. "You can read minds?!"

"I don't have to. I know what that silence means. Just know... Mocel tells me you know Miquiz. That you... are sympathetic. The final of the six soldiers got away. She got away with him as her prisoner."

Oh. You stare at the Solarian warriors, and the mountains surrounding them.

"It's really a beautiful view. It would be much better if they'd never come, but we can't change the past. And... if we could, I would have killed all of them."

You stare at those dead warriors for a long time.

Then: "Well... what do I do now?"

Toffee looked at her inquisitively. "Are you asking me as a doctor, or as a warrior?"

"As a practice-er of magic. You clearly know more about it than I do. How do I stop this dark magic? I wasn't able to by myself."

Toffee sighs. "Well. I know this much. When you leave the hospital, I'll make sure you and your friends get out as safely and as quickly as possible. Then I'd advise you to go to Glossaryck."

"Glossaryck?" You groan.

"Don't worry. He'll have to do something he does not want to do."

"Ooh, what's that?" you ask, grinning.

"He'll probably try one last time to fix the dark magic. Let him, but make sure he does not place you in danger to do it. Do it with Marcie, she's better at spotting danger than you."

"Hey! I'm great at spotting danger."

"You took a rest over a pit of dark magic."

"...touch-eee."

"When he fails, you tell him you want to speak to his mother."

"What?" you sputter. "I thought she... like, doesn't hang around anywhere near here."

A barking laugh, from the anesthesiologist. Wait, when did she get here? Toffee shakes their head at her, then continues. "You'll find her in the Tavern Beyond the Multiverse. It's built around the edge of magic, beyond nonexistence and the doorway into the Omniverse, the inner workings of our reality and infinite others."

You blink. "Those are very big words."

"It's a place where things are weird and you have to be very careful to avoid causing a time paradox, hurting yourself, or destroying the entire multiverse even more than it's already been destroyed."

"By the dark magic."

"That too."

You frown at that thought. But it's not important. One crisis at a time. "How do we get there?"

"There's... more ways than there really should be," Toffee says. "But the easiest and least deadly is just having Glossaryck open you a portal. He can do it, so make him do it. Twist his arm however you can."

You nod. "Okay. I can do that, and I'll have your help, right? You're great at making people do things."

"No, I won't be coming with you."

"What? You totally should! I am giving you permission to come along, we'll need you!"

"You're... not the one I need permission from," Toffee said, looking away. "And until she understands what happened, I'm certain she wouldn't want to see me, much less work with me."

"Oh..." Star said, hesitating. "You mean... Mom."

"Yes." There is a pause, and then: "I ruined her life. We both did."

The anesthesiologist snorts. "She ruined her own life. If she wasn't so hopped up on revenge, it never would have happened, and countless innocent lives would have been saved."

Toffee sighs. "She was just a child. I don't want to talk about this any further, not without her present."

The anesthesiologist crosses her arms. "Fine. I'll shut up. Just finish telling Star what she needs to know and then she can go to sleep and let the adults talk. It's past her bedtime."