Archive of Our Own ^beta

Wally was starting to regret agreeing to come up to the Watchtower. Don’t get him wrong, he loved the view and the giant space station wasn’t exactly unimpressive, but it got boring fast when there was no one his age around.

Especially considering nothing was going on. Of course, no news was always good news, since the news were usually bad. But still, something small could at least happen to satiate his painful boredom.

Then his prayers were answered, for better or for worse.

The Justice League members who were present in the Watchtower that day filed into the room, taking their seats around the table. Namely Superman, Wonder Woman, Green Lantern, Aquaman and The Flash. Really, the only original members missing were Batman and Martian Manhunter.

Wally quickly moved to perch on the edge of his Uncle’s chair, allowing Barry to sit down. The older Flash nodded at him gratefully.

“Wow,” he whispered to his Uncle, “what soured y’all’s moods? You look like someone cancelled Christmas.”

Barry snorted and he saw Clark hold back a smile despite the mood.

“It’s nothing serious,” Clark assured him, “don’t worry about it, kid.”

“That just makes me worry more, Supes,” Wally joked, making the older man laugh. “But what happened, then?”

“What happened,” Hal hissed from his seat, “is someone locked all of our gear away in one of the panic rooms.” He shot a pointed glare at Barry, who wilted slightly.

“It was an accident!” He exclaimed, raising his hands in surrender. Wally snorted.

“How do you manage that on accident?” He asked, amused. Hal shouted his agreement as the other members present groaned.

“Wally!” Barry gasped. “Who’s side are you on, here?”

“I dunno,” Wally replied with a shrug. “The less stupid one?”

Hal laughed out loud. “I cannot believe he’s related to you, Barry. Kid’s hilarious.”

Barry gasped again, more dramatic. “And I’m not?” It overshadowed Wally’s mumbled, “not a kid.”

Diana waved a hand. “You have your moments.”

“I’m not sure if I should be offended by that or not.”

“Friends,” Arthur interrupted, the chatter quietening. “Can we get back to the task at hand? Our weapons are currently compromised.”

“Compromised,” Wally echoed, eyebrows pinching in disbelief. “Why can’t you get to them, though? You can’t open your own panic rooms?”

He glanced over to Diana and Clark, the two founders present. Clark winced while Diana rubbed the back of her neck sheepishly.

“Batman designed the panic rooms,” Diana explained, “he can open them through voice activation. We have attempted to open them in other ways but to no avail.”

Wally held back a snicker. “And Batman is paranoid,” he finished.

Clark nodded in response. “Yes, quite,” he agreed. “One of his best and yet most infuriating qualities.”

“Okay,” Wally hummed, “so you need Batman. Have you called him? Left him a message? Summoned him?”

Barry chuckled from next to him. “You deem us that incapable, Wally?”

Wally shrugged. “Isn’t this your fault in the first place?”

He heard Hal desperately hold back another fit of laughter as his Uncle gaped at him, scandalised. Even Arthur let out a huff of laughter.

“We’ve tried,” Clark interrupted, “but he is unreachable at the moment. He is away on personal business and told us he did not want to be disturbed unless it was quote; ‘a world-ending emergency’.”

“Which this is not,” Diana finished, grimacing slightly. “It is rather inconvenient, however.”

Wally racked his brain for a solution. They needed Batman. Specifically Batman’s voice. And from the looks of it, it couldn’t be recorded and played through something or forged by a computer.

The solution washed over him like cold water. He was kind of shocked that Barry hadn’t thought of this first.

“Have you tried contacting Robin?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. Barry glanced at him curiously while the rest of the League had their own looks of confusion pasted on their faces.

“Robin?” Diana echoed. “Batman’s sidekick, yes?”

“Yeah,” Wally confirmed happily.

“Hasn’t there been multiple of them little guys?” Hal asked, tilting his head. “Which one do you mean?”

“And why would we call Robin? Wouldn’t he be with Batman?” Clark added after a moment.

Barry was still staring at him silently with a puzzled expression.

“Uh, the current one,” Wally said, answering Hal. “And Robin has been trained to perfectly mimic voices. Batman’s included.”

There was a collective gasp from the members present, some more impressed than others. Even Barry seemed surprised. Clearly he had not known that Damian could do that.

“He sounds truly impressive. And he is not with Batman at the moment?” Diana asked with a slight frown. Wally shook his head.

“No,” he denied, “he’s off-duty, right now, last I checked.”

Damian should be off duty right now, anyway. That’s what Dick had told him when he called him earlier. Something about taking a break from patrol for the day since Tim and Jason had it covered. Apparently, Damian had been running on fumes non-stop since Bruce left on his business trip and his brothers had collectively gathered to force him into taking a break. It was kind of sweet.

“And you have contact with Robin?” Arthur asked, confident but curious. Wally swayed his head from side to side as if to say ‘kind of.’

“In a way,” Wally said, “I have his number, but the chances of that little shit picking up when I’m the one calling are very low.”

“So how do you plan on contacting him?” Clark asked kindly. Wally shrugged nonchalantly, taking his phone out and waving it around.

“I have his brother’s number,” he said, “and they’re definitely together right now.”

“His brother?” Hal asked with a tilt of his head.

“Yeah, his eldest brother,” Wally confirmed, “Nightwing, or the very first Robin.”

The League was once again thrown into surprise and Wally froze. Shit. Could he say that? Did he just dig himself a personal Wally West-shaped grave to be shoved into by the Bat?

“That little man?” Arthur said, a smile coming to his face. “He was a formidable warrior for his age.”

Wally snorted, some of the tension leaving him. “Well, he’s not so little anymore. Unfortunately. I miss when he was tiny, too,” he lamented, a pout settling on his lips. He did miss when Dick was a short and scrawny teen. Although, he did love Dick now, as well.

“You’ve known him a while,” Clark pointed out. An observation.

“Yeah. I was part of multiple teams with him,” Wally said with a nod. “Amazing guy.”

“Call him,” Diana said, clearly interested. “I have missed him and his impressive acrobatic abilities.”

Wally laughed. “Say that again when he can hear you.”

Diana nodded and Wally unlocked his phone, selecting Dick’s name from his contact list. He placed the phone on speaker, setting it down on the table. The line rang three times before Dick picked up.

“Walls, hi!” Dick’s voice came through the tiny speaker. “What’s up?”

“Nightwing,” Wally said, alerting Dick that their conversation was being listened to. “You’re on speaker.”

“I see,” Dick said with a hum, “who are you with?”

“The Justice League,” Wally answered, his smile definitely audible. “Some of them, at least.”

“Oh,” Dick said and Wally had to snicker. He probably was not expecting that. “Hi, Justice League! Is there a reason I’m on speaker?”

“Robin…” Diana said, tone full of wonder. It was clear she recognised either Dick’s voice or speech patterns.

Dick was silent for a moment and Wally sweatdropped. Hopefully he would not be getting a long lecture on secret identities, later. But this wasn’t that surprising, was it? He had honestly thought that everyone knew this already. Then, Dick laughed. “Haven’t been Robin in a long while, Aunt Di!” He chirped and Diana visibly brightened, Wally sighing in quiet relief. “But I’m glad you remember me.”

“You’re quite hard to forget,” Clark said, smiling as well. “Meeting you was quite the shock.”

“I’m sure,” Dick said through laughter. “Mr. Broody Bat who supposedly works alone coming in with a bright and colourful child? Unheard of, Uncle Clark.”

Clark chuckled. “It’s good to hear your voice again, kiddo.”

“Aww, have you missed me?” Dick teased, far too smug. “I’m honoured!”

“Anyways,” Wally interrupted, staring at the Justice League. “‘Wing, is Robin with you?”

“Robin?” Dick echoed, his voice slightly more distant, as if he looked around him. “Not presently. Downstairs, I think. Why?”

“Can you and him come to the Watchtower? There’s a slight… issue,” Wally explained, shooting an amused look at Barry, who rolled his eyes.

“Robin and I?” Dick asked, “what do you need both of us for?”

“Well, technically we only need Robin,” Wally drawled, “however you coming along would be appreciated.”

“Don’t you have Robin’s number, Walls?” Dick asked and Wally knew he was being made fun of. “You could’ve just called him.”

Wally groaned. “Don’t be like that. You and I both know that he would not pick up a call from me.”

Dick snickered. “Yeah, he wouldn’t. Sure, we’ll come by. Give us five minutes?”

“Be my guest,” Wally grumbled, “as long as you come by too. I’m not dealing with him myself.”

“He’s not that bad, don’t be dramatic,” Dick said and Wally could feel the eye roll through the call. “On our way. See you soon!”

There was some shuffling and a vague yell in the background before the line went dead.

“Charming, isn’t he?” He asked the Justice League, who were all sporting varying levels of amusement.

No one else said anything for the next few minutes, likely processing the information they’d just been given. Wally was content to just sit there and await Dick’s arrival. He’d missed him, anyway.

As promised, it was only five minutes before the Zeta-Tubes were activated and a mechanised voice echoed throughout the hall.

Recognised. B01, Nightwing.

Recognised. B32, Robin.

Wally brightened at Dick’s designation, hopping off his place at the side of Barry’s chair.

Moments later, chatter could be heard as Dick and Damian came into view, both decked out in their full gear. Damian paused as he looked around, searching for something.

“Where’s the threat?” He asked, question directed at the Justice League. Dick shook his head in what looked like fond exasperation.

“I told you, Baby Bat, there is no threat,” he said dryly, as if he’d repeated it multiple times already. “If there was a threat Wally would have been way more panicked.”

“Hey,” Wally said, walking up to greet Dick. “I can handle threats fine, thank you very much.”

Dick chuckled. “I’m sure you can.” He smiled, fistbumping Wally as he walked up. “Hi, Walls.”

Wally obliged the fistbump, grinning. “Hiya, Rob.”

Damian clicked his tongue from next to them. “Why was I requested to come here, West? Explain yourself.”

Wally turned his gaze on Damian. “Good to see you too, little guy.”

“Uh-huh,” Damian replied, disinterested, “so?”

Wally gestured to the Justice League seated behind him. “I’ll let them explain that.”

He saw Barry wince when Hal glared at him again. Damian nodded.

“Very well,” he said, walking up to the Justice League and casually perching on Batman’s designated chair. As if that was a casual thing to do. “What do you need my assistance for?”

Dick snorted from next to Wally. “Only him, Walls. Only him.”

Wally nodded in agreement. “He’s definitely something.”

“Hello, little Robin,” Diana greeted and Damian immediately shot her a glare.

“I am not little,” he denied with a firm shake of his head. “But I shall forgive you due to Father’s praise. He tells me you are a formidable warrior and opponent.”

Diana’s surprised expression melts into something akin fond amusement. “Batman does?”

“Yes,” Damian confirmed, growing slightly impatient, “will you enlighten me on your current issue, now?”

“Intense kid,” Hal said, smirking. “I like you. We just need your voice.”

Damian looked at him, eyebrows pinching in minute confusion. “My voice?”

“Well,” Clark interrupted, “not your voice. We require Batman’s voice. We have been told you can imitate it near-perfectly.”

Damian made a small noise of understanding, clearly putting the rest of the puzzle pieces together in his head. Wally resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Damn family of detectives. He glanced at Dick, who looked like the ever-proud parent he was.

“I see,” Damian said, “what requires voice authorisation, then?”

“One of the panic rooms,” Hal explained, shooting yet another glare at Barry. Damian, obviously, caught this movement and snorted.

“Interesting,” he said, hopping off the chair. “Seems like incompetence runs in the family, Allen.”

Barry made an indigent and offended squawk which Wally mirrored. He heard Dick snicker next to him and shot him a betrayed look. Dick just shrugged at him.

“Wait,” Arthur said, voice towering over everyone else’s. “Robin, you can indeed mirror Batman’s voice?”

Damian looked at him for a long moment before nodding.

“Yes,” he said with a perfect imitation of Batman’s growl. If Wally hadn’t literally seen the kid’s mouth say the words, he would’ve thought the Bat himself was hiding somewhere in the room. By the way the Justice League startled, they had thought the same.

“I have been trained to be a perfect vocal mimic,” Damian continued, still sounding exactly like Batman. It was unnerving.

“Oh, oh!” Barry exclaimed, shooting his hand up. “Do me, do me!”

Damian rolled his eyes but obliged.

“Do me, do me!” He parroted, Barry Allen’s voice suddenly taking over his own. Barry brightened to unimaginable levels.

Diana smiled, looking severely impressed. “A perfect vocal mimic?” She asked, raising a curious eyebrow. “For every kind of voice?”

Wally was pretty sure she was referring to Damian’s ability to mimic female and higher-pitched voices, but it really could have been anything. In any case, Damian nodded, clearing his throat.

“Any kind of voice,” he confirmed, a perfect imitation of Diana. “I would be putting my teachers to shame if I could not.”

“Very impressive,” Diana complimented, Dick beaming like an absolute idiot next to Wally. The pride was practically rolling off of him in waves.

“Robin’s voice impressions are good enough to fool the Batcomputer,” Dick added, Damian preening under the praise. “So any of Batman’s tech, basically.”

“Thank you,” Damian said to Diana, quieter and in his own voice, again. He cleared his throat once more. “Well then. Where is this panic room you need assistance with?”

“I’ll take you,” Hal offered, a mischievous glint in his eyes, “but first, can you say ‘I’m an idiot and this is my fault’ in Barry’s voice?”

“Hey! What?” Barry yelled, offended. Wally snickered. “What’d I do to you?”

“Got us in this mess,” Hal replied easily with a wave of his hand. He looked at Damian expectantly.

Damian raised an eyebrow at the odd request but nodded.

“I’m an idiot and this is my fault,” he said, tilting his head and grinning as Barry’s voice spilt from his lips. “There. Shall we go, now?”

Hal cackled as he got up from his chair to lead the young vigilante to the sealed panic room.

“Hal will have way too much fun with this, now,” Wally whispered to Dick, watching as Barry gaped at the duo leaving the room.

“Oh, for sure,” Dick agreed, still beaming. “This is a dangerous skill he’s just been handed.”

Wally snorted. “If he can bribe Damian enough, that is.”

Dick shrugged. “Ice-cream and zoo trips all around the world will do it.”

Wally laughed, Dick soon joining him. This was what Wally was missing. Laughing with Dick so carelessly, conversation flowing without a care in the world. He loved it.

A few minutes later, Hal and Damian returned, the former absolutely beaming.

“Mission success,” Hal said, his ring securely back on his finger. “The room’s open.” He looked down at Damian, ruffling his hair. “Thanks, Robin.”

“It was nothing,” Damian replied, waving him off. He turned to glare at Barry. “Do not be such a fool, next time.”

Hal laughed. “I’ve definitely got a favourite.”

Jay (5:47pm): Hey fuckwad

Jay (5:47pm): What’cha want for dinner?

Jay (5:48pm): And don’t say spaghetti again. Something else.

Roy smiled as he read the messages, opening the chat box to type back spaghetti (but with extra meatballs).

“What’re you smiling at, Speedy?” Hal asked, throwing himself on a seat across from him, a knowing and smug expression plastered on his face. Roy rolled his eyes at him, turning his phone off.

“Nonya, Lime Lantern,” Roy replied with a wave of his hand, “somethin’ you want?”

“Me specifically? No.” Hal nodded towards the other end of the room, where the other members of the Justice League minus Flash and Batman were discussing something. “I just left that conversation ‘cause it’s getting nowhere.”

Roy hummed in mock sympathy. “As usual,” he jested, “what’re they talking about?”

Hal groaned. “A threat came in earlier today, addressed to the League,” he explained and Roy raised an eyebrow. A threat? “And they’re still discussing how to handle it.”

Roy frowned. “What kinda threat has the Justice League running around with their tails between their legs?”

Hal rolled his eyes at the light jab but continued: “A Gotham-based most-wanted villain left the threat,” he said, placing his head in his hands. “And since Bats is unavailable…”

“You’re deciding whether or not to pursue them,” Roy finished, “‘cause it’s a serious threat, but Batman doesn’t want you in Gotham.”

Hal nodded and Roy couldn’t help but snort. “That’s fuckin’ gold.”

Wait. Gotham-based? Most-wanted list?

Roy grinned, holding his phone tighter. Holy shit.

“Hey, who was it that sent the threat?” He asked, doing his best to subdue his grin. Hal raised an eyebrow but didn’t comment on it, so he must be doing decently.

“The Red Hood,” Hal confirmed with a sigh and Roy was two breaths away from rolling on the floor. No way. “He’s been running us in circles and we cannot get any hold of Bats.”

Roy choked on a laugh, disguising it with a cough. “That’s tough,” he said, with as much sympathy as he could muster. “Hope ya catch him, soon.”

“Me too, kid,” Hal said, getting up and ruffling Roy’s hair as he left to seemingly rejoin the conversation. “Me too.”

Roy watched him leave and let himself snicker as soon as he was sure Hal was out of earshot. He turned his head down, pulling out his phone and typing as quickly as possible.

Roy (5:59pm): JAY

Roy (5:59pm): DID YOU SEND A THREAT TO THE WATCHTOWER

Roy (6:00pm): ?????

The reply came just a minute later, Roy sparing one glance to the chatting Justice League before looking back down.

Jay (6:01pm): Nah

Jay (6:01pm): Was I supposed to?

Jay (6:02pm): Also, that’s not a dinner dish. Try again, Ed Sheeran

Roy (6:04pm): so u didn’t send a threat to the watchtower as RH??

Roy (6:04pm): and spaghetti with extra meatballs please

Jay (6:05pm): Fuck you and your spaghetti.

Jay (6:06pm): And no. What the fuck are you on about?

Roy (6:06pm): i’m not hearing a no on the spaghetti ;)

Roy (6:07pm): but fr uhhh some Red Hood copycat has apparently sent a threat to the JL up here at the WT

Roy (6:08pm): should i tell them it wasn’t actually u??

Jay (6:10pm): YOU’RE KIDDING

Jay (6:10pm): That’s the best thing I’ve heard all week, oh my god. And they think I’m still on most wanted too, right?? So they’re probably losing their absolute shit like headless chickens

Roy snorted and spared another glance at the League. Yeah, that seemed about right.

Roy (6:12pm): got it in one! so, guess i’m on damage control? cause i hear bats is unavailable

Jay (6:12pm): The old man is on his second Brucie trip this month, it’s hilarious lmao

Jay (6:13pm): So I guess u are. Good luck with that. Should I come by to make it easier for ya?

Roy (6:14pm): you just wanna be dramatic ??

Jay (6:14pm): Guilty as charged.

Roy (6:15pm): go for it. can’t rly stop you, can i?

Jay (6:17pm): Nope, in gear already. Omw, ETA 10 min.

Roy huffed, pocketing his phone. Either he could wait until Jay gets here and do damage control then, or he could get started now. He supposed he might as well do the latter, so the entire League didn’t immediately draw their weapons on Jay when he arrived.

He took a deep breath and rose from his chair, walking over to the conversing Justice League.

Unsurprisingly, it was Oliver who noticed his approach first. He smiled at him. “Roy! What’s up?”

As soon as his presence was announced, the rest of the members turned to look and smile at him as well. It was kind of creepy, honestly. They all shot out short greetings of their own and Roy smiled back at them. He cleared his throat.

“I know this might sound a bit, uh, insane,” he started, because how else do you start something like that? “Whoever you received that threat from was not The Red Hood.”

The reaction was instantaneous, the temperature of the room dropping several degrees. The atmosphere was suddenly more tense than Roy was used to.

“What do you mean by that?” Oliver asked him, ever the mediator. He had a strange look on his face, caught between disbelief and trust for him.

“It’s not the Red Hood,” Roy repeated with a shrug like that explained everything. Which, in Roy’s defence, kind of did. “It’s some sort of fake, impersonator, or whatever. Someone trying to be funny maybe? I dunno. But it ain’t Hood.”

He heard Clark inhale next to him, his eyes narrowed in the nicest, most Superman way possible. Disturbing.

“Any grounds for this claim, Arsenal?” He asked and ouch, okay, back to superhero names, were they? Someone was stressed.

Roy thought about the question for a moment. Usually, he’d deny any relationship with Red Hood, as per Jay’s (and his family’s) request. But if Jay was showing up in less than ten minutes, anyway, then that meant it was fine, right?

So, he just shrugged again.

“I know Hood,” he answered and heard a few sharp intakes of breath. He didn’t know whether to be proud of Jay for racking up this much of a reputation despite not being a crime lord anymore for years now; or to be concerned that the League still thought of him as such a huge threat. “And that’s not him.”

“Ignoring that you supposedly know a most-wanted crime lord,” Hal said, with a surprising amount of patience, “how do you know that he’s not lying to you? He’s on the most wanted list.” He stressed those last words as if Roy didn’t realise what they meant.

Except… Jay wasn’t on the most wanted list. He was removed from it by Batman years ago. It showed just how often the League looked at the list.

The rest of the League was also looking at him with varying levels of concern as if he was the stupid one here.

Roy rolled his eyes, opting to end this charade as quickly as possible. Preferably at least fix it up before Jay got here.

“He’s not, actually,” he corrected, looking at each member separately with the same level of amused disappointment. “Hood was taken off the most wanted list years ago. Which you’d know if you actually checked the damn thing.”

Oliver opened his mouth to say something but was conveniently cut off by the sound of the Zeta-Tube.

Recognised. B13, Red Hood, it rang out, the mechanized voice echoing around the hall.

Roy saw Diana’s eyes light up with recognition as she mouthed ‘B thirteen’.

He’s early, was Roy’s original thought at the sound of familiar footsteps, which was then followed by of course he is. He can’t help being dramatic.

The League, for their lack of credit, seemed to have frozen in place. They were all staring in the general direction of the Zeta-Tubes, waiting for what they thought was a dangerous crime lord to show up.

Sure enough, Jay came into view a few beats later, fully decked out in his Red Hood gear like he said he was. His helmet was missing from his head, though, tucked under his arm instead. Not for the absence of a domino mask, of course. Jay was no fool.

He nonchalantly scanned over the League before his eyes landed on Roy and he smirked.

“‘Sup, inferior red Outlaw,” he greeted, Roy rolling his eyes in return. “Ya called?”

“I texted, actually,” Roy replied and Jason groaned. “But yeah, I did. Wanna help me out, here?”

Jason hummed, looking over the dumbstruck League again. This time, his gaze seemed to have paused on Diana.

“Wonder Woman,” he said happily with a small salute, “always a pleasure.”

Roy turned to face Diana, who was scanning Jay’s face for something. Her eyebrows were pinched in concentration as she searched.

Jason just smiled and after a few moments, she seemed to have found what she was looking for, because she beamed back at him.

“B-thirteen,” she said, copying the Zeta designation code. “I thought that was familiar. Welcome home, my little warrior. I had not heard you had returned.”

Someone behind her made a strangled noise but Jason just laughed good naturely.

“Yeah, well, you know who ‘ta blame for that, Aunt Di,” he chirped, “I shoulda told ya myself anyway, though. My bad.”

“Nonsense,” Diana denied, waving her hand dismissively. She took a step forward, reaching her hand out and cupping Jason’s cheek. Jason leaned into it minutely. “You’ve gotten so big. And strong, if this is any indication.”

She huffed a laugh, shooting the red helmet a glance. “I should’ve known. No one ever did it quite like you, you firecracker.”

“Nah, not even the old man knew it was me originally. I don’t blame ya.”

Roy watched the scene unfold with an amused and fond interest. He knew Jason was close with Wonder Woman back when he was still Robin, but he didn’t think it was this close.

Diana turned to him and nodded. “Very well. I believe you.” She glanced at Jay. “You wouldn’t threaten the Watchtower, would you?”

It was clear she was amused and Jason only matched the emotion.

“Nah,” he confirmed, shrugging. “Maybe as like, a prank. But this ain’t me, Di.”

Diana nodded again, turning back to the League. “The threat was not Red Hood. We should look into who the actual culprit is.”

The League just stared at her with varying degrees of shock. Roy couldn’t help but snicker. Jay snorted from where he was now next to him.

Clark cleared his throat. “Can you… explain this?” He gestured vaguely to where Roy and Jason were standing, but his question was directed at Diana. Some other members of the League nodded behind him.

Diana tilted her head. “Explain what? This is quite self-explanatory.”

“It is not,” Arthur intoned, speaking for the first time since this whole thing began. “But I am willing to listen to the explanation.”

Roy snorted at how Diana’s face fell upon realising that, indeed, the rest of the League was entirely lost. The disappointment in her expression was unmatched.

“I need a picture of that,” Jay whispered to him, clearly holding back laughter. “It would work wonders on the old man.”

Roy made a noncommittal noise of agreement as he continued to watch the scene in front of him.

Diana glared at each member separately before sighing.

“None of you recognise the designation B-thirteen?” She asked, raising an unimpressed eyebrow. Some of the League members’ expressions pinched in thought but no one spoke up. J’onn, to his credit, nodded but otherwise stayed silent from his position in the back of the group.

Roy huffed a half-laugh and elbowed Jay, nodding at Martian Manhunter. The snort he received in return told him that Jay had noticed too.

J’onn definitely knew.

Diana sighed again, long and defeated. She turned to Jason, her eyes asking permission. Roy turned to him too, curious. Bats was usually really cagey about the identities of his kids.

Jason smiled and nodded, permission given. Roy’s eyes widened marginally but he didn’t comment. He’d ask Jay about it over dinner later.

Diana smiled back minutely before her expression fell again when she turned back to the League. It felt like a cartoon.

“What do you remember of Batman’s second Robin, then?” She asked them and half of them bristled. They remembered him, alright. Roy himself had only met Jason as Robin briefly, courtesy of Dick, but even he could admit that the younger man had been unforgettable.

Clark’s eyes widened, seemingly coming to the correct realisation. “No,” he breathed, stare burning into Jay. Any harder and it would’ve become literal and Jason would have two laser eye-shaped holes through his face.

Roy snorted. “First stage, denial,” he stage whispered.

Jason shot Clark a crooked grin. “Yeah. Good ‘ta see ya too, Uncle Clark.”

Hal had also gotten a case of wide eyes. “No way in hell,” he said, Jason snorting in return. “You’re that little ball of energy?”

“Ay,” Jason said, his eyes narrowing behind his domino. “I was not that little. Shut up.”

Hal, to his credit, laughed. “Oh, you were an absolute riot! Never understood why you left so quickly. Bats wouldn’t share.”

Roy winced but Jason’s mood didn’t seem to sour much. Nor did he satiate Hal’s curiosity, however.

“I certainly see the resemblance,” Arthur said calmly, looking Jason over. “You’ve still got the same curls, aside from the whitened element. Similar face shape, as well.”

Jason chuckled. “Thanks, Fish King. Appreciate the compliments.”

Oliver brightened as if he figured something out. “Ah, that explains it. Bats took you off the list, then.”

Jay raised an amused eyebrow. “Yeah,” he confirmed, “years ago. Sorry ‘bout allat trouble, by the way, wasn’t really feelin’ myself.”

Roy openly laughed at that. “That’s one way to say you were under the influence.”

Jason shrugged. “That makes me sound like I was on drugs.”

Roy shrugged back. “Does the Lazarus Pit count as a drug?”

Jason frowned, feigning genuine thought. “Uh. Maybe?”

“Then you were on drugs.”

“Sure. Tell that to the old man.”

“I’m not telling Batman his son might’ve been on drugs.”

“Why not? Ya just said it to me.”

“Are you Batman?”

Jay shrugged again.

“Boys,” Diana interrupted, a fond note in her tone. She shot Jason a fierce look and something in those eyes told Roy that she and Jason would be revisiting this conversation later. “I’m glad to see that you two get along so well, but we have a task at hand.”

“Right, the fake me,” Jason said, nodding. “D’you reckon if I just call him back and threaten him to fuck off, he will?”

“I’m not sure since he had the guts to threaten the League in the first place,” Roy mused, “but you should do it anyway because it’ll be funny.”

Jay grinned at him, extending a fist that Roy obliged with a bump. “This is why we’re friends.”

Roy gasped, pulling his hand away like he’d been burned. He placed it over his heart dramatically. “I’ve been demoted. I can’t believe you.”

Jason made a show of rolling his eyes under the white lenses, using his fist to cuff him over the head. “Shut your trap, Speedy. C’mon, show me the source of the call threat.”

With that, he walked further into the Watchtower. No one tried to stop him. Roy shrugged and grinned at the League before running to catch up to him.

The last thing Roy heard before they were out of earshot was Oliver’s surprised squawk: “Did he just say demoted to a friend?”

Kon looked up from his phone as Tim walked into the room, groaning and throwing himself face-first onto his bed. Kon tilted his head and raised an eyebrow, wondering what had him in such distress. Especially in so much of it that he came all the way up to his room in full gear, sans domino.

“No capes upstairs,” he chastised, amused. “What’s up with you?”

He received no answer except another groan, so he poked Tim with his heel.

“Tim?” He asked, Tim making a muffled noise to indicate he was listening, this time. “What’s happened? Not many things have you moping like this.”

“‘M not moping,” came Tim’s whined reply, “the Justice League is pissing me off.”

Kon straightened up against the headboard and sighed. “What’d they do this time? Were they too slow in apprehending someone again? Did they not figure out your fifty-eight-character security passcode fast enough?”

Tim moved his head to pin him with a glare. Kon sent an amused look in return. Tim groaned again.

“Their Zeta-Tube broke, apparently,” he said, exasperated, “I don’t even know how they managed that. How do you break a Zeta-Tube?”

Kon snickered and Tim continued.

“They’ve been sending communications to the Batcave for hours asking B to come fix it because they’re convinced he’s the only one who can.” He slammed his fist on the bed. “B hasn’t fixed a Zeta-Tube in his life! He might’ve activated one of my codes, once, but nothing other than that!”

Then he deflated. “Not only that, but B is unavailable right now, gone on Bruce Wayne business. And this isn’t really an emergency, so he won’t exactly be rushing back. So I’ve just got to deal with useless alerts coming in every ten minutes.”

Kon raised an eyebrow. There was an obvious solution to the problem that Tim had clearly overlooked.

“Why don’t you just go, then?” He suggested, waving his phone around. “I mean, you can fix the Zeta, right? That’ll shut them up.”

Tim just glared at him again like he was stupid.

“They hardly know who I am,” he told him, frowning. “Plus, how am I supposed to get to the Watchtower without the Zeta-Tube?”

Kon matched his frown. “You’ve been to the Watchtower before, though,” he said, confused. “Plenty of times. We’ve been there together! What d’you mean they don’t know you?”

“As Robin,” Tim replied, lifting himself into a proper sitting position. “They’re entirely unfamiliar with Red Robin. The most they might know about me is that I’m some Gotham vigilante.”

“Some Gotham vigilante,” Kon parroted, a laugh on the tip of his tongue. “Looks like they’ve got you down to a T, Red.”

“Ha-ha,” Tim said, rolling his eyes.

“I don’t think it’ll be much of a problem, though,” Kon continued, shrugging. “If you come in with me and I vouch for you, then they’ll just have to deal with it.”

He examined Tim thoughtfully. “Unless you just want to tell them that you were one of the Robins? That’ll make everythin’ easier.”

Tim pursed his lips. “I mean, Jay and Dick have already,” he said, a hand coming up to his chin. “So B is obviously okay with it. Sure, why not?”

After a moment, he snorted. “One of the Robins. Sounds like a boyband.”

“You kinda are like a boyband,” Kon stated helpfully, grinning.

“A boyband plus Steph,” Tim corrected, “although, she would love to be part of a boyband despite not being a boy, so.”

They laughed together for a moment at the thought of all of Batman’s children forming one big boyband. B would somehow get even more grey hairs, Tim had said, struggling to catch his breath.

“As for your other concern,” Kon said eventually, jumping up from the bed and extending his arms. “Air Kon?”

Tim’s eyes widened minutely before he laughed and jumped towards him. Kon caught him easily, arms looped under the shorter boy. “One of these days I’m just going to move out of the way and let you fall.”

Tim scoffed. “You wouldn’t dare.”

“Right. Ready?”

“Always.”

Kon rolled his eyes and rose off the ground, holding Tim close to him as they sped out of Wayne Manor and towards the Watchtower.

The flight wasn’t too long, all things considered, and soon enough they were touching down in the giant space station. He set Tim down slowly, the boy in question running a hand through his hair immediately.

“Four out of five stars,” Tim breathed, holding up four fingers with his free hand. “Would’ve been five if it didn’t ruin my hair every time.”

Kon rolled his eyes. “Sorry I don’t come equipped with a roof.”

Tim huffed, shooting him a smirk. “Maybe we should give you some upgrades, then.”

“I don’t think my biology would accept that. Just get yourself a helmet.”

“I’m not putting on a helmet every time you fly me somewhere.”

“Then suffer, I guess.”

“Who coded you with this much sass?”

Kon snorted, snapping his sunglasses open and putting them on. “No-one. This is all me, baby.”

Tim shook his head with a stupid grin on his face. He waved for Kon to follow him as he headed towards where the Zeta-Tubes were located. “I don’t even want to know where you pulled those out from. C’mon.”

“Rule number one of being cool is always having shades on your person!” Kon called as he caught up to him. He heard voices growing louder and louder as they rapidly approached their destination and he could easily identify them as his Dad, Barry, Diana and Hal.

“And you are sure Batman is unavailable?” Diana was saying and he heard Dad sigh.

“He seems to be. We’ve been sending periodic messages to him and he seems to not have received any of them. Whatever he’s doing, it’s more important than this,” he answered her.

Tim scoffed, whispering, “if you count faking being drunk and air-headed at rich events as important, then sure.”

Kon laughed slightly too loud, realising a bit too late as his Dad called out again.

“Kon?” He said, a bit confused. “Come out here, son.”

Tim shot him a shit-eating grin, fishing a spare domino mask out of his utility belts and starting to put it on. He tilted his head innocently as if to say ‘well? Go on.’

Kon cursed before doing as he was told, stepping into the large room and coming face-to-face with the Justice League members present.

“Ah, it is you,” Dad said, a smile blooming on his face. “What brings you to the Watchtower, sonny?”

Kon vaguely registered Diana also shooting him a smile and Barry giving him a wave. He couldn’t see Hal very clearly from where he was standing, but he was pretty sure the man had nodded in greeting.

“Heard there was a problem with the Tubes,” he said with a nod towards them. They definitely looked broken, if the lack of usually blinding lights was any indication. “Looks like that’s true.”

His Dad sighed, running a hand down his face. “Yes, indeed. We’re still not sure exactly how it happened but we are no closer to fixing it.”

Diana nodded solemnly. “Batman could, perhaps. Alas, he is unavailable, as you can guess by his lack of presence.”

Kon nodded in return and spared a glance at Barry, who was looking at the Zeta-Tubes like they were a puzzle he couldn’t quite solve. That was the most direct focus Kon thought he’d ever seen Barry give anything.

“Nightwing, Red Hood and Robin also seem to be unavailable,” Diana continued, “considering none of them are answering any communications, either. Our running theory is that they are all in the middle of a mission with Batman.”

Huh. Really? All of them? Kon snook a glance over his shoulder at Tim, who was making a so-so gesture with his hand. Whatever that meant.

“Why do you need the Bats specifically?” He asked, despite already knowing the answer. They were under the impression that any of the Bats could fix a Zeta-Tube. Which was true, but he kind of wanted to hear them say it.

Hal shrugged from the corner of his eye. “Bats is the only one we’ve ever seen go near the structure of the Zetas. If anyone would know how to fix them, it’d be him. And he teaches his associates all his tricks, so.”

Kon heard Tim snort quietly behind him and held back one himself. Associates.

“Right,” Kon said, nodding along. He flashed one last look over his shoulder to see Tim giving him a thumbs up. All clear. “Good thing I brought one of my own, then.”

His Dad frowned at him in confusion, Hal following suit. Diana tilted her head, intrigued, and Barry… was focus-locked on those Zeta Tubes. Which was alright, Kon supposed. Barry already knew Tim and his family, courtesy of Wally.

There was a slight hint of quiet shuffling from behind him and Kon immediately knew Tim had moved. He was now likely somewhere in the shadows, waiting for the moment Kon introduced him. Bats, he thought, all so dramatic.

“One of your own?” Hal asked, “your own what? Bat?”

Kon grinned at him. “Bingo, Uncle Hal!” He took one step to his left, gesturing to the spot he was just in with his arm. A moment later, Tim dropped down and took the spot, not even a peep as he landed.

Kon watched as his Dad’s eyebrows shot up, Hal groaning with something along the lines of ‘of course’ being muttered under his breath. Diana just smiled, confused but still intrigued.

“Hi,” Tim said, giving them all a small wave. “Red Robin. Pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

“Huh. Is it really making their acquaintance if you’ve already met?” Kon asked, raising an eyebrow at Tim, who just shrugged.

“Dunno,” Tim said, “but it’s their first time meeting this identity of mine, so. I guess?”

“We’ve met?” Dad asked, looking Tim up and down with a searching expression. Tim nodded.

“Sure have, Uncle Clark,” he said, smiling. Kon took the chance to lean on Tim’s shoulder.

“C’mon, Dad,” Kon taunted, a matching smile spreading across his face. “Knows me, works with Batman, about this height.” He placed a hand atop Tim’s head to punctuate his last point.

His Dad snapped his fingers, expression lighting up with recognition. “You’re Robin! The third one!” He exclaimed.

“The third one,” Tim echoed, faking offence, “but yes, correct. Hiya!”

He waved again and Diana visibly brightened. “We should have guessed,” she said, amused. “We have met all of your brothers and they were the first, second and fourth respectively. You were the only one left.”

To most of their surprise, Tim laughed out loud.

“I love the confidence, Aunt Diana, but you have not met all of my brothers,” he corrected, Kon starting to laugh along with him. “Nor have you met all of the Robins. The current Robin is actually the fifth one, not the fourth.”

Hal sighed in defeat from over at the side and Tim just laughed harder.

His Dad blinked in confusion. “I don’t remember there being a Robin between you and the present one,” he said, Tim quietening his laughter as best as possible.

“There was one, she was just Robin for a very short time,” Tim explained, taking a few deep breaths. “So you wouldn’t have ever met her. She was still the fourth Robin, though.”

“She?” Diana asked, a sort of glee in her tone. “There was a female Robin?”

“Yep,” Tim answered, popping the P. “She’s pretty cool. Goes by Spoiler, now.”

“She’s pretty cool,” Kon mocked, Tim turning to stare at him. “You say this as if she’s not literally your other half, dating or not. I have never seen more unfiltered bestie energy.”

“Did she teach you that?” Tim asked, raising an amused eyebrow.

“Maybe,” Kon responded with a one-shouldered shrug. “I like hanging out with her.”

“I’m sure you do,” Tim mused, turning back to the League. “But yes, Spoils was Robin four. Now, the Zeta-Tubes?”

Something told Kon that Diana was not done with this conversation, but he filed that for later.

“So you can fix them,” Hal noted, a hint of wonder in his voice. “Did Bats teach you?”

Tim snorted. “He wishes,” he said, walking towards the broken Tubes. “I coded half of the security of these things. All B did was insert my codes into them.”

“All the Bats are exceptional hackers,” Kon said, following him and patting Barry on the back as they passed him. The man in question startled but otherwise didn’t move. “But Red’s the best of the best. You got lucky!”

“Feeding my ego over here, Kon,” Tim said, grinning as he examined the Zetas.

Kon shrugged. “You deserve it. Sometimes.”

“Sometimes,” Tim echoed with a huff. “Of course.”

“Can’t have you getting too cocky.”

“You’re one to talk.”

“Sure am.”

“You’re insufferable, you know that?”

“You remind me regularly!”

Tim snorted. “Seems like I need to do it more. Hey, can you get my tablet? I left it in the Cave.”

Kon nodded, hovering slightly. “Near the Computer?”

“Yep,” Tim confirmed, “should be right next to the keyboard unless someone moved it.”

Kon gave another nod, readying himself to fly off but was stopped by his Dad calling out.

“Wait,” his Dad said, all eyes falling on him. “The Cave? As in, the Batcave?”

Kon raised an eyebrow. “Yeah? What other cave is there?”

Tim laughed, reaching a hand over his shoulder for Kon to hit. Kon obliged the high-five with a smile.

“I was under the assumption that there were no metas allowed in Gotham,” Hal said, doing his best impression of the Batman growl. Which was not very good, but A for effort.

Tim hummed in response. “True. Mostly.”

“Mostly?” Dad and Hal echoed, scarily similar.

“I’d like to see B try to ban Kon from Gotham,” Tim said, a dangerous glint in his eyes. “Or Wally, for what it’s worth. Or Kori. Or Jon.”

“There’s also Signal,” Kon added, Tim nodding along.

“Jon?” Dad echoed. “Jon too?”

“Jon’s besties with Robin,” Kon confirmed, “the current one, that is.”

“Letting you hang out with Steph was a mistake,” Tim mumbled under his breath and Kon laughed.

“Whatever, Boy Blunder,” Kon said and flew off. He barely registered Tim’s responding yell.

“That’s not my thing, it’s Nightwing’s!”

Bruce needed a hot shower. And an aspirin. And maybe about seventeen days worth of sleep. He had gone to three full business trips in the last month, all abroad and exhausting.

It wasn’t that he couldn’t keep up– far from it. He was Batman. He’d dealt with worse.

But as Batman he didn’t have to talk so much. As Brucie Wayne, everyone wanted to talk to him in one way or another. And while he pretended to be air-headed…

Well, most socialates were.

So, he needed a break.

He should’ve been wiser than that. When did stepping through the doors of his own manor ever mean peace?

The first to greet him was Tim, who was sitting on the stairs in the strangest position Bruce had ever seen. He couldn’t even begin to describe it, but Tim looked comfortable, so he didn’t comment. His son was scanning something on his tablet as he waved in Bruce’s direction.

“Hi, B,” Tim said, “welcome home. How was the trip?”

Usually, the correct reaction here would be to give an answer. But this was Tim, and Bruce knew better than that. He was instantly proven right when Tim snorted, meeting his gaze.

“Just kidding. I know how it went.” He waved his tablet around as to emphasise his point. “I’ve already transcribed all your meetings and replied to most of your emails. Anything else I should do while I’m at it?”

Bruce huffed a breathy laugh, walking up to Tim and ruffling his hair. “Thank you, Tim. And no, that’s good. I’ll do the rest myself, later.”

Tim hummed, leaning into the touch. “Alright then.”

“Incoming!” Was heard above them and Bruce moved aside just in time to dodge a launched Dick Grayson. Tim ducked his head down slightly as well, despite being nowhere near his flying older brother. Bruce’s eldest landed somewhere behind him, presumably perfectly on his feet if the lack of screaming was anything to go by.

“Dick,” Bruce greeted, turning to face him. “How are you?”

“All good, B,” Dick replied cheerfully, indeed standing perfectly upright. “Welcome home. Trip go alright?”

Bruce nodded. “Exhausting but not entirely terrible,” he answered, Dick snickering.

“He means that his social battery’s run out,” Tim chimed from his place on the stairs. Bruce shook his head fondly while Dick laughed.

“Sounds about right. Been Brucie for too long, huh?”

“Hn.”

“Aw, don’t be like that. We all get a bit grouchy because of too much social interaction, sometimes!”

“Says the biggest extrovert on the fuckin’ planet,” Jason drawled, having come down the stairs at some point during Bruce and Dick’s conversation. Bruce turned to face his second eldest, who was currently purposefully standing on Tim’s foot.

“Jason,” Bruce said with a small smile.

“Yo, old man,” Jason greeted in return. “Y’alright?”

“Get off me, you idiot,” Tim complained, attempting to kick Jason off his foot. Jason did, side-stepping Tim’s following kick at his shin. Dick snorted from somewhere in the back.

“I’m alright,” Bruce replied as Tim grumbled something under his breath. “Tired, but alright. And you?”

Jason waved a dismissive hand. “Fine,” he said, “was just gonna go help Alfie in the kitchen.”

“Suck up,” Dick stage whispered, receiving a glare from Jason.

“Ya don’t get to say shit, Goldie,” Jason hissed, pointing an accusing finger at his older brother. “At least one of us knows how to fuckin’ cook.”

“Hey, I know how to cook,” Tim interjected, not looking up from his tablet.

Jason groaned. “I’m not talkin’ to you, Replacement. Plus, the most you can cook is like an omelette.”

“But it’s a damn good omelette,” Tim replied with a shrug. Jason rolled his eyes.

“I know how to cook,” Dick defended and Bruce had to fight a wince. His eldest was talented in many things but cooking was unfortunately not one of them.

“Is that Dickie spouting bullshit I hear?” Came Stephanie’s voice as she entered the entrance hall from the left, the direction of the living room. Jason and Tim snorted in unison at her words.

She smiled as she caught Bruce’s gaze. “B-man, hiya! You holdin’ up?”

“I’m holding up,” Bruce confirmed with a nod. “I see you’re doing fine?”

“Sure am!” Stephanie said, giving him a dramatic thumbs up. Then her gaze lingered past Bruce and landed on what he assumed to be Dick behind him.

“You, though,” she chirped, “you’re lyin’ again. The only meals you’re capable of making are pot noodles and cereal.”

Dick made an offended noise as Jason and Tim laughed. He must’ve opened his mouth to try and speak because Stephanie shook her finger.

“No, no, I’m not done,” she said, shaking her head as well. “You’re literally banned from the kitchen. There’s a big, bubbly sign attached on the whiteboard that just says ‘NO DICK GRAYSONS ALLOWED NEAR THE KITCHEN APPLIANCES’. Do you know how embarrassing that is?”

“I know you put that there,” Dick deadpanned.

Stephanie shrugged. “I didn’t deny that. I just said that it’s there. And Alfie hasn’t taken it down, so he must agree with me.”

“She got ya there, Dickiebird,” Jason said, now having taken a seat on the stairs next to Tim. Tim, who had finally taken his eyes off his tablet and was watching the entire exchange in clear amusement.

“This is betrayal of the highest caliber,” Dick mumbled and Bruce could practically feel the man crossing his arms and pouting.

“Is it?” Damian said from Dick’s direction, startling Bruce just a bit. When had his youngest entered the room?

Even so, Bruce wasn’t Batman for nothing. He took the slight startle in stride, spinning around to where Dick and Damian were. Damian was standing on Dick’s right, an eyebrow raised in the direction of his brother. Bruce was also correct about Dick’s current position. Arms crossed and pouting.

“You have many admirable qualities, Richard,” Damian said, patting Dick’s back as if in sympathy. “But culinary skills are not among them.”

Dick looked like someone shot his dog.

“Dami?! You too?” He exclaimed, turning to face Damian, who only shrugged.

“I see no point in lying about it,” he said, Dick’s jaw dropping. “Everyone has weaknesses.”

Dick huffed but didn’t push it, a smirk settling on Damian’s face. Bruce heard laughter from behind him, likely from his three other present children. After a moment, Damian’s gaze landed on him.

“Father,” he greeted with a nod. “You’ve returned. Welcome back.”

Bruce huffed at the familiar antics as Dick pouted. He nodded back at Damian.

“Hi, Damian. Have you been well?” He asked, reaching out to ruffle the boy’s hair.

Damian shrugged but didn’t shy away from the touch. “I have,” he confirmed, “although you should reconsider leaving all these imbeciles in one house together for this long in the future. Not even a second of quiet in this building, ever.”

Bruce could only chuckle as he pulled his hand away. “It’s part of your charm, chum.”

“Wow, I didn’t know we were having a party in the entrance hall,” Duke chided, appearing from the right, or the direction of the kitchen. Cassandra was right behind him, slithering up to his side as soon as he stopped.

“Yeah, and you weren’t invited,” Stephanie called across the hall. “Shoo, shoo.”

“Aw, that’s a shame,” Duke replied, tilting his head. “Guess I’ll tell Cass we’re not welcome.”

Stephanie inhaled sharply, clearly having not noticed Cassandra prior to her previous sentences. “Cass?”

Cassandra took that as her cue to step a bit further forward, seemingly into Stephanie’s field of view. Stephanie paled almost comically.

“Ah, no, you’re always welcome,” she corrected with a wave. Cassandra giggled and waved back. Duke grinned at Stephanie, smug over his victory. She stuck her tongue out at him but said nothing more.

Bruce heard Tim mutter something along the lines of ‘favouritism’. Stephanie glared at him and he grinned back innocently.

“Hey, B,” Duke greeted, turning to him with small salute. “You’re back. Welcome to your humble abode.”

“Hi, Duke. You’ve been well?” Bruce returned with small nod.

“Yeah, all good,” Duke confirmed, “a bit hectic, but that’s normal, ain’t it?”

Bruce chuckled. “That it is. You’re not so innocent yourself, son.”

Duke grinned and held his hands up in mock surrender. “Never claimed to be.”

Bruce felt a light tap on his shoulder as Cassandra appeared next to him. She gave him a smile and a small wave when he turned to her.

“Cass,” he said with a matching smile. “I trust you have been alright, as well?”

She nodded. “Everything is okay,” she said, glancing over her shoulder at her bickering siblings. “Happy.”

Bruce raised his hands to his chest and rotated his hands gently and Cass beamed.

“Happy,” she repeated, signing it back to him. “Glad.”

“It’s all I can ask for, really,” he said, looking to where all of his remaining kids have started bantering with each other. He hoped Tim’s tablet wouldn’t get smashed. He looked at Cass again. “You should go join your siblings.”

She giggled. “Too easy,” she said, “they will all lose.”

He huffed a laugh at that, patting her shoulder. “Go show them up, then.”

She nodded, grinning. “Will do.”

And she was off.

Despite what he claimed, he found himself back at the Watchtower the following day. He got warm greetings upon his arrival, which he expected. What he did not expect was his kids being brought up not even ten minutes into his first meeting back.

“What did you say?” He asked, turning towards Diana. She tilted her head in question but repeated her statement nonetheless.

“I still wish to meet your female Robin,” she said with a smile. “I am most excited to know that you have a woman in your ranks.”

That wasn’t right. Female Robin. The Justice League shouldn’t be familiar with Stephanie, let alone of her time as Robin.

Bruce frowned beneath his cowl. “You know of her?”

“Indeed,” Diana confirmed, something smug taking over her expression. “Red Robin has informed me of her existence. How come we never met her?”

Tim. They knew about Tim, too.

Bruce grunted. “She wasn’t Robin for very long due to certain circumstances,” he explained, “she was barely active in Gotham, I never had time to introduce you.”

Diana nodded. “Very well. However, my original point stands. I wish to meet her.”

Bruce nodded but narrowed his eyes, not that it had much effect. He let his gaze wander to every member of the League separately, suddenly hit with a startling realisation. He’d been away practically the entire month. There was no telling what his kids have been up to. Did they…?

“You’ve all met Red Robin?” He asked, a bit incredulous. He’d been planning to introduce the League to his kids anyway but this is quite the turn of events.

“Well, not all of us,” Arthur said with a shake of his head. “I believe Hal, Diana, Clark and Barry met him.”

“Barry had met him before,” Bruce dismissed quickly, some of the member’s eyes widening at that. Barry folded a bit under the attention but no one commented on it. “But the rest of you… when?”

“About a week ago,” Clark said with a shrug. “The Zeta-Tubes got a bit messed up and Kon brought him up here to help fix them.”

Ah. That made sense. Of course, no one in the League could get through Tim’s security systems or even try to fix the Zeta-Tubes.

“Also,” Hal added, “we’ve all met him before. He was your third Robin, wasn’t he?”

Bruce nodded. “He was. I am merely surprised he revealed himself to you as Red Robin. Although I suppose it makes sense. No one else could get past the Zeta security codes he himself installed. He made a logical choice.”

Hal whistled. “You almost sound proud, Batsy.”

“I am,” Bruce affirmed, to their slight surprise. “He performed admirably.”

“Proud father alert,” Barry said, snickering from his seat. “It suits you, B.”

Bruce huffed, turning back to Diana. “I can call her up here right now, if you want?”

Diana nodded, excitement visible. “That would be lovely, thank you.”

As Bruce was taking out his phone, Clark spoke up. “Ask your other kids to come by, too. I’ve missed them.”

Bruce paused as he placed the phone on the table. “All of them?”

Clark shrugged. “Why not? We’ve met them all, already.”

There were sounds of agreement all around the table. Bruce highly doubted they had actually met all of his kids this past month, but he couldn’t exactly refute it. After all, he hadn’t know they’d met Tim as Red Robin. The possibility that they’d met the rest of them was on the table.

“Alright,” he agreed after a moment. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you, though.”

He scrolled through his phone, selecting the contact labelled ‘Stephanie’ and letting it ring. It only rang once before it was picked up.

“B-man!” She chirped, as excited as ever. There was a faint mish-mash of voices in the background. Bruce guessed she had left whatever room her siblings were currently scuffling in. “What’re ya callin’ me for? Need some glitter in your life?”

Bruce watched as Diana visibly perked up at Stephanie’s voice, as if she didn’t quite believe that there had actually been a female Robin.

“Spoiler,” he said, knowing Stephanie would understand the implications of the usage of the moniker. “Are all of your siblings home?”

“Oh, are we using our emo monikers?” She said and Bruce resisted rolling his eyes. “Alright then, Batman. Uhh, yeah, they are. None of ‘em have actually left since yesterday.”

She put an unnecessary amount of emphasis on ‘Batman’ but Bruce didn’t have enough energy to reprimand her. He heard Hal and Barry snicker from where they were sitting and shot them a glare that shut them up.

“Can you all come to the Watchtower,” he said, not as a question. “As soon as possible.”

“Oooh,” she sang, “is one of us in trouble? Why’re you callin’ all of us?”

“The Justice League wishes to meet you,” he explained, quick and to the point. “All of you, apparently.”

“The Justice League?” She asked, “ah, I see. I’m on speaker, ain’t I? Hi, Batsy’s only friends!”

Bruce groaned as Hal and Barry devolved into new fits of laughter, even Clark chuckling into his hand. Arthur and Diana just beamed at him.

“Just gather your siblings and get up here,” Bruce said, exasperated. “Suited up, please.”

Stephanie’s laugh crackled over the speaker. “Well I can’t say no if you’ve said please, B. Alright, I’ll grab ‘em. But you owe me!”

“Owe you what? I already pay for your, well, everything,” he asked, confused.

“Don’t worry ‘bout it,” Stephanie said, then hung up.

Bruce just sighed into his hands.

“She seems wonderful,” Diana said cheerfully and Bruce sighed louder.

“She’s certainly unique,” he grumbled and he heard Clark laugh.

About fifteen minutes of painful small talk later, the Zeta-Tubes activated, a mechanised voice ringing throughout the hall.

Recognised. B01, Nightwing.
Recognised. B32, Robin.
Recognised. B36, Orphan.
Recognised. B38, Signal.

Bruce saw the League’s faces morph from excitement to vague confusion at the last two designations, confirming his previous theory. They had not met all of his kids.

The four that had arrived came into view fairly quickly, all chatting to each other. Well, more like Dick was having a conversation with Damian, who looked like he didn’t want to be there, and Duke was happily chatting with Cassandra who was nodding along.

“Kids,” Bruce said, gathering all of their attention immediately. “Where are the other three?”

“Hood and Spoiler hung back ‘cause of an alert,” Duke explained and Bruce straightened. An alert?

“Nothing serious, of course,” Dick was quick to add and Bruce untensed a bit. “They should have it over and done with pretty quickly. But a call’s a call, so.” He shrugged.

“And Red Robin?” Bruce prompted, noticing the lack of his third son.

Cassandra tapped her ear twice as Damian said; “He stayed back too, to be their comms.”

Bruce nodded, accepting the explanation. He gestured to the remaining empty seats around the table, urging them to sit down. To the League, he said; “We will wait for those three to arrive before we do anything. You may chat to these four as you see fit.”

However, instead of taking the seats as he expected, his kids walked directly up to him. Damian climbed the back of his chair, perching himself atop the backrest. Duke leaned on the side of it easily, elbow just next to Damian. Dick grinned as he took a seat at Bruce’s feet, content to sit there cross-legged. Cassandra quietly moved to sit on one of the armrests.

Bruce just sighed. He should’ve expected that.

The rest of the League was watching the entire scene with curious eyes. Bruce grunted but said nothing, waiting for his other kids to arrive before he even begun introducing them. Diana was staring at Cass with nothing short of wonder, pun intended, but held her tongue. Bruce had a feeling it wouldn’t last.

They sat in careful silence for who knows how long before the mechanised voice returned.

Recognised. B13, Red Hood.

Recognised. B20, Red Robin.

Recognised. B28, Spoiler.

Tension he didn’t even realise was there leaked out of Bruce’s shoulders at the designations. His kids were fine. They were okay. The problem had been handled.

Cassandra clearly noticed because she pat the top of his cowl gently in a comforting gesture. He shot her the tiniest of smiles in thanks.

“Get back here, you little shit!” Came Stephanie’s yell as rapid footsteps approached. Bruce heard Tim’s slightly frightened laughter before he came into view, practically sprinting.

“Oh, shit,” he said upon seeing the scene in front of him. Then he leaped, hiding behind Bruce’s chair. “Hide me, please.”

Bruce was about to chastise him for his language before Stephanie came running in as well, eyes narrowed and scanning the room. Her suit was covered in patches of soot, Bruce realised, and the tip of her hood looked like it’d been on fire moments beforehand.

Her gaze landed on him and he sighed. “What happened?”

She took a deep breath before replying. “Red Robin,” she hissed, “decided it was a fantastic idea to give me the wrong directions over comms, and led me directly into enemy fire! Literal fire!”

She gestured to herself as to emphasise her point.

“It was an accident!” Tim squeaked from behind the chair and Stephanie’s gaze honed in on the location.

“How do you give me the entirely wrong directions on accident?! And directly into enemy fire?!” She screamed, sprinting directly for him. He sprang up, hiding behind Cassandra.

“Oh don’t you hide behind Cass, ya coward,” Stephanie said, rolling her eyes. “Take your punishment like a man!”

Tim glared at her. “I won’t take punishment for something that wasn’t my fault,” he replied.

“Kinda was your fault, Red,” Jason drawled, choosing that moment to saunter into the room, hands behind his head. Unlike Stephanie, he was practically untouched aside from a few patches of dust and dirt. Bruce noted he had forgone his helmet, donning just his domino, instead.

“My directions were correct!” Tim claimed, frowning. “I didn’t know there’d be a random gang throwing molotovs and shit?!”

Jason laughed. “Swear jar, baby bird.”

“Shut up, you hypocrite.”

“You’re not off the hook, Red,” Stephanie said, though her shoulders did drop. “I will get my revenge.”

“Kids,” Bruce voiced, all his kids turning to face him. “We will discuss your qualms later. Settle down.”

Jason snorted but obliged, sitting down next to Dick at Bruce’s feet. Tim, after making sure that Stephanie wouldn’t immediately jump him, placed himself on the seat’s other armrest, mirroring Cassandra. Stephanie moved to lean on the other side of the backrest, nudging Damian in the process and receiving an eyeroll.

Bruce shook his head fondly before turning to the League, who were still currently some form of dumbstruck. He resisted the urge to snort.

“I’m not sure how necessary these introductions are, however,” he said and gestured to the kids that currently surrounded him. “These are my children.”

All of his kids made varying quiet noises of agreement at the same time, going silent again after a few seconds.

“They are Nightwing, Red Hood, Red Robin, Spoiler, Orphan, Robin, and Signal,” he introduced, pointing to the respective kid each time. Each either waved, saluted or nodded at their turn.

He turned to Diana and nodded. “Yes, Diana, Orphan and Spoiler are both my daughters. Yes, you may train with them if they are willing.”

Diana beamed and he saw Stephanie and Cassandra both perk up at the attention.

“I see,” Clark said, smiling in their direction. “You are one big family, then.”

Bruce grunted in approval and his kids laughed around him. From there, it was mostly idle chatter, the members of the League happily asking his kids questions here and there. A while passed before Dick tapped his shoulder.

“Hey, B,” he said, “you reckon it’s time? You said you’ve been thinking about it.”

Bruce sighed. He had been thinking about revealing his identity to the rest of the League. He trusted them and had for a while but couldn’t find the right moment to do it. Dick seemed to have thought this was it, and Bruce was inclined to agree. He nodded at his eldest.

“Woo!” Dick cheered, loud, gathering the attention of everyone present. He turned to look at all his siblings, grinning. “Guess what B just agreed to!”

“No way,” Duke said, a smirk on his face. “Really?”

“‘Bout time,” Jason stated, a crooked grin on his. “Took ya long enough.”

Stephanie did a little cheer from next to him. “Hell yeah! Rock on, B-man!”

Tim grinned at him from Jason’s other side. “Finally. I was beginning to think I’d never see the day.”

Cassandra gave him a solid thumbs up before tapping her chin quickly followed by an array of quick hand movements. Good luck.

Damian nodded, coming up next to her. “Indeed. The time seems right, Father. I support this.” Cassandra ruffled his hair.

Bruce took a deep breath, turning to where the League had gathered themselves. “I suppose my children have voiced everything appropriately,” he said, amused. “But I trust you. As both my team and my friends. So…”

He heard a few intakes of breath as he reached up, pushing the cowl back and uncovering his face.

“My name is Bruce Wayne,” he announced, seeing Hal’s jaw drop. Clark’s eyes had widened significantly. Diana was grinning at him, something proud in her eyes. Barry was just smiling, having practically known already. Arthur gave him a firm nod of appreciation, thanking the gesture of trust. “And I am Batman.”

All his children cheered in unison from behind him before bursting into laughter. He allowed himself to smile as he glanced at them over his shoulder. “Your turn, now, you absolute menaces.”

Their laughter died down, despite Bruce still hearing some snickering. He straightened, going to stand next to his teammates in the League.

Dick stepped forward, doing a handspring as he did so. His siblings groaned but the smiles on their faces never wavered. Dick grinned too, giving the League a little bow before peeling his mask off.

“Dick Grayson,” he introduced, “at your service. B’s very first Robin and this family’s very own Nightwing.”

“My first annoyance, you mean,” Bruce grunted and laughter rang out. Dick laughed possibly the hardest, shooting Bruce a wink. “I took that job very seriously, I’ll have you know.”

Bruce waved him off and Dick stepped back. There was a pause before he shoved Jason forward.

“Wow, okay,” Jason said, shooting Dick a glare. “Rude.”

“Just introduce yourself, you nerd,” Tim called, the glare turning on him. Stephanie snickered on his left.

Jason huffed, turning to the League and pointing a thumb in their direction as if saying ‘get a load of this guy.’

Diana giggled and Jason seemed to have taken that as a win because he immediately brightened. He gave them a small salute before peeling his mask off.

“Jason Todd,” he said, holding up two fingers. “Robin number two. Currently Red Hood and not on the most wanted list, thank you very much.”

Bruce frowned in slight confusion but the rest of the League seemed to find it amusing. He filed that conversation for later. Jay had been off the list for years. Why was he bringing it up?

He heard Clark inhale sharply next to him. “But didn’t you…?”

Jason just grinned at him. “Die? Yeah. Don’t fry your brain ‘bout it, Supes. I’ll tell you some other time, maybe.”

Bruce didn’t think that satisfied Clark at all, but the man said nothing else.

With that, Jason stepped back and Cassandra swiftly stepped forward.

She removed her face covering and pointed to herself, giving a small smile. “Cassandra. Cass,” she said, following it with a wave. “I was Batgirl for a little bit, now I am Orphan.”

“She’s also the best of us,” Duke said, a chorus of agreement from his siblings following. Cass blushed slightly under the praise before stepping back.

Tim went to step forward but was blocked by Stephanie hold her arm out. “Nuh-uh,” she said, “me first. I’m older.”

Tim rolled his eyes but conceded, gesturing her forward. “Yes, your purple highness,” he said, voice dripping with sarcasm. Jason snickered, Dick following suit.

Stephanie nodded and flipped her hood back as she stepped forward.

“Stephanie Brown,” she said, pulling her mask down. “But don’t actually call me Stephanie, that’s a weird B thing. Steph will do.” She grinned at them, counting on her fingers as she listed; “I was the fourth Robin for a bit, then I was Batgirl for another bit, now I’m Spoiler.”

With a final wave she stepped back, immediately pushing Tim forward.

“The audacity is through the roof,” he complained, shaking his head. “Anyways.”

He reached up and pulled his mask off, clean and easy. “Tim Drake,” he said, “Robin number three and currently Red Robin. I’m also the current CEO of Wayne Enterprises, if that counts as any sort of reveal.”

Bruce smiled at him proudly, which Tim softly returned.

“Can I ask,” Clark began, Tim’s attention falling on him. “What exactly is your relationship with Kon?”

Bruce heard the kids let out a collective ‘oooooh’ from behind Tim. Tim only shrugged, shooting Clark a seemingly innocent smile. “Don’t worry about it, Uncle Clark.”

With that, he stepped back, Duke stepping forward before Clark even had time to process that.

He swiftly took his helmet off, giving the League a small wave with his free hand. “Duke Thomas,” he stated, “I’m the newest addition to this chaos. I go by the Signal.”

“He’s also a meta,” Jason added unhelpfully.

“And B dares to say that he doesn’t play favourites,” Tim continued, shaking his head.

“I don’t,” Bruce denied immediately, all of his kids shooting him a deadpan look. He just grunted, not bothering to have this argument again.

“Duke’s our meta, though,” Dick chirped, stepping forward to envelop Duke in a hug, effectively pulling him back as well. “So lets be glad B holds some favouritism.”

Duke had clearly shut down under all of the affection, eliciting a laugh from his cheeky siblings.

Damian took the opportunity to step forward next as the laughter quietened.

He tilted his head slightly before peeling his mask off. “Damian Wayne,” he said, “I am–”

“–The blood son,” his siblings chorused, finishing the saying. Bruce couldn’t help but snort.

Damian shot them all a glare, but it was half-hearted at best. That, along with the fact that he was still smiling. He turned back to the League.

“I am the current and fifth Robin and am the only biological child of Father,” he finished.

“He’s our little baby,” Stephanie said with a chuckle. Damian rolled his eyes.

“I am fifteen years old, Brown,” he replied, exasperated.

Stephanie grinned at him. “Ouch. Back to the last names, are we?”

Damian just grinned back, raising a hand. “Cease your senseless babbling, Stephanie.”

“What the hell,” Jason said, looking between the two. “What’re ya bribin’ the brat with?”

“Maybe I’m just in a good mood, Jason,” Damian suggested, raising an eyebrow. Tim and Stephanie folded with laughter.

“Nah, that sounds weird as hell,” Jason said, but grinned as he walked forward and scooped Damian up. He placed the small teenager on his hip. “But s’alright. We’ll get used to it.”

Damian glared. “Don’t get used to it, Todd.”

Jason laughed. “There he is.”

Bruce turned to the League, who were all watching the scene with a fond look in their eyes.

Yeah, he made the right choice.