Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"Now you be sure to be polite, dear. Think before you speak."

"Yes, Mother."

"You remember how to put on your uniform like I showed you, right? You can't be sloppy with your clothing."

"Yes, Mother."

"And make some friends, Karina, please. I know there's going to be a lot of people there but that just means you'll be more likely to find someone you can get along with. Don't stop trying, okay? Just watch out for all the boys that will only want to put a baby in you."

"Yes, Mother," I say a third time, standing as still as I can as the woman fusses and fiddles with my clothes, straightening and brushing off the skirt I'm wearing because I like the way it swishes and flows around my legs and how easy it makes hiding a dagger on my thigh. Her purple hair falls in curly locks all the way down her head, bobbing around and brushing against my hands as she leans over to tighten my collar. She's not a tall woman, but I'm very short for my age—something I find reason to regret almost daily. 

"I know, I know, I'm just repeating myself. You're a smart, strong girl. You can take care of yourself. But a Crest like yours is valuable, dear. A mother worries." 

I nod carefully, feeling my own hair tickle my ears as my head moves. Though I've inherited my mother's beautiful hair, I've always preferred to keep mine short. It felt constantly distracting when I was a child, my hands always finding their way up to play absently with the curls until the habit was scolded out of me. Even now, I feel a slight temptation to reach out and pull on one of the coiled springs growing from my mother's head, but that wouldn't be proper so I stay still. I am very good at staying still. 

"Thank you for worrying about me," I tell her, and my mother smiles. 

"Oh, you're such a good girl," she beams, her eyes glistening. "You make your father and I so proud. I suppose I should stop stalling and let you get to your carriage, shouldn't I?"

"Probably, but you are paying them so I do not think they will be inclined to leave without me," I point out, and my mother laughs. 

"I suppose so. I guess I'll stall a little longer, then." 

She embraces me in a hug, and while I stiffen up at first I slowly reach my arms around her and give her a careful squeeze back, feeling her breath on my shoulder and her heartbeat in my ear and her warmth on my chest. I've always known it, but it is especially obvious in this moment before I leave the barony without my family for the first time how much she'll miss me. It's… nice, in a strange way, to know that I'll be missed. I've certainly worked hard to be worthy of her love. 

And thanks to that hard work, I've been accepted into the Church of Seiros Officer's Academy. 

"Alright," my mother says, finally breaking from the hug. "Let's get you on your way. Be sure to say hi to your cousin if you see her, but don't get in the way of her work. And please send a letter every month if you have the time. Your father and I are going to want to hear all about what you're getting up to!" 

"Yes, Mother," I agree dutifully, and both of us finally exit the dressing room, head downstairs, and make our way to the waiting travel carriage that has long since been loaded up with my suitcases. With another, even more final set of goodbyes, I eventually manage to get inside the vehicle and begin the long, long trip to the Garreg Mach Monastery. But much like how I'm good at staying still, I'm very good at waiting, too. 

---

The Garreg Mach Monastery is very large and very old. I do not understand how something of its size could be built on foundations crafted over a millennium ago. It looks more like a giant castle than a religious edifice, but considering that it is also a primary base for one of the largest and most dangerous military forces on the continent, I suppose that is quite sensible. 

My father graduated from the Officer's Academy himself, and though he has many complaints about this place he seemed quite pleased when I asked to apply. The Empire has been… chafing a little, I think the term is, at the many restrictions the Church of Seiros imposes—my father tends to speak very loudly about the quotas of various metals he's required to sell the church at barely-profitable rates when drunk—but so far as I know he is just grumbling. The Church has the support of Faerghus, Leicester, and, despite the figurative chafing, most of the Empire as well. It more or less runs off of the support of all three nations to maintain a neutral ground and prevent further war; there isn't anywhere in Fódlan that doesn't pay tithes to it in one way or another. 

People seem to get really intense about religion. My family doesn't worship the goddess outside of a few words on holidays, though, so I've never particularly understood it. 

"Ah- ha! Is that another first year uniform I see?" a loud, crisp voice rings out as I step off the carriage and accept my suitcases from the driver. "Hello and well met!"

I look towards the voice and spot a patch of carrot-colored hair and bright, matching eyes power-walking towards my location at an impressive speed. It's a boy wearing the same uniform that I am, though he has pants instead of a skirt and has styled his outfit with a cravat, which is an explicitly allowed addition to the uniform per the rules outlined in the Officer's Academy campus living policy. This man will be one of my classmates. I nod to him in greeting. 

"I am Ferdinand von Aegir!" he declares proudly. "May I ask your name, miss?"

"Karina von Gillingr," I answer, staring intently at him. Aegir, he said. Where have I heard… oh that's the Prime Minister he is the Prime Minister's son. I should try to make a good impression somehow. 

"Ah! Doubly well met, then!" he announces even more brightly. "I was almost worried you wouldn't make it on time! I have heard tales of how difficult it is to travel through Gillingr territory." 

"Not difficult," I correct. "Merely time-consuming. The mountains are jagged and the paths are few. Getting from one place to another is very inefficient, unless you wish to make the trek on foot or wyvern." 

"Hmm! You know, I never thought about traveling long-distance via wyvern. Do you have many wyverns in Gillingr territory?"

"Yes, but they are mostly wild," I answer. "Not good for travel. They like to eat our goats. I think we should eat them back but my father said wyverns are not good for eating. I tried some anyway, once. It tasted okay."

He blinks at me. I maintain eye contact like a good conversationalist.

"Ah… I see," Ferdinand eventually says. Hmm. Is that a bad 'I see?' I stare at him more closely. "Well please, allow me to assist with your luggage!" 

Oh, he wants to help me. Maybe my first impression was good after all. He steps next to me and grabs the suitcase in which I brought my clothing without waiting for me to answer. That's weird and I don't like it but it's probably not a bad sign. 

"As a fellow noble and member of my class, I would be honored to help you locate your room and get settled in! Most of the rest of us arrived yesterday with the Knights of Seiros, so I have been spending the day helping Edelgard set up the classroom and ensure everything is in order since for some reason our instructor doesn't seem to have done so. The Golden Deer and the Blue Lions have had their instructors decided already, but our house hasn't been told who will be teaching us. Isn't that strange? Oh, hello again, Byleth." 

"Hello," a woman in weird leggings answers emotionlessly as she walks by.

"Anyway, I hope there isn't some sort of problem with our instructor. The first yearly event is the rivalry of the houses, and the Black Eagles must prove our superiority and prevail, don't you agree? Yet we'll be at a major disadvantage without an experienced instructor to support us. It is most vexing!" 

I nod along quietly, Ferdinand seeming to be more than capable of handling my half of the conversation in addition to his own. He almost talks as much as my mother. I can't decide if that's good or bad, but I do my best to listen and hope that makes him like me. 

Ferdinand apparently considers it his 'noble duty' to help me move into my new room, which concerns me for a moment because I'm a noble and I came too late to help anyone else move in. He gets distressed when I point that out, though, and insists I have done nothing wrong. I guess it's his noble duty and not mine? I've never heard of any etiquette about this and it worries me a little. He seems to have a lot of very high standards for nobles, which I think would make sense to me if I could understand what those standards were. His reasoning was very unclear, but I accept that he doesn't want my apology and let the conversation move on. 

Still, he seems happy enough talking to me, and while I struggle to follow along the whole time I think it's a good sign. He's particularly excited to talk about how my father's barony—and therefore my father—have been dramatically increasing in value for the past two decades or so, though he seems to want to attribute this to what he insists must be my father's excellent leadership rather than the rich mineral veins that were uncovered in our territory via means utterly unrelated to my father at all. It baffles me a little, but I've observed this sort of behavior before and know better than to comment.

Regardless of the reason why, it's good that my father's barony is bringing such value to the empire. I suppose that it will likely one day be my barony. Perhaps that and more, if House Barnabas remains barren for reasons I have a strong suspicion about but will never voice. Baron Barnabas is a close family friend, after all. I stayed the night with them on the journey here and all but had those suspicions confirmed, though of course I didn't try to make contact with the likely perpetrator. 

Though that reminds me. My mother warned me about boys who might be interested in my blood and my womb more than anything they actually claim to be talking to me for. Politically speaking, the Prime Minister's son is… unlikely to be taking that route. My father's barony might be rich, but his father is well above the need to care about something as small as a barony. Though I'm never supposed to say so out loud, my father says the Prime Minister has more power than even the Emperor! Our social standings are leagues apart. There shouldn't be any reason he would wish to court me. 

…Except for my Crest. Anyone with a Major Crest can expect to be marrying up the social ladder. The value I bring to someone like an Aegir is the very fact that it would be expected for me to leave behind my family, my territory, and my name to bring only my blood to the engagement. So that my power can become part of House Aegir, and no one else's.

I have always known this. And I have always known better than to feel too much unnecessary loyalty to the name Gillingr. So while Ferdinand could easily do quite better for himself than the daughter of a baron, I keep an eye on him anyway as he busies about my room, unpacking my suitcases and rearranging my new furniture in ways that he insists will be more 'homely' after I tell him that I genuinely do not care how things are organized.

He doesn't glance my way any more than average. His pupils don't dilate when looking at me, or flash over my body to judge it. Most other signs of attraction I tend to look for overlap with signs of exertion, so I'll have to check them later, but overall he seems quite intent on helping me unpack my room and little else. Almost like a servant. For arguably the most powerful member of the empire in this entire monastery, it's rather uncanny. 

A knock on the door frame announces the arrival of the two sets of footsteps I've heard approaching for some time. The door is already wide open (it wouldn't be proper for Ferdinand to be in my room otherwise) so I turn and spot the other arguably most powerful member of the empire in this monastery, if you like to be either pedantic or wrong. 

Princess Edelgard von Hresvelg, first and only in line to the Emperor and almost certainly Ferdinand's superior in personal, physical power stands firmly in the doorway, eyebrow raised as the son of the prime minister continues busying himself with my luggage. She, not Ferdinand, wears the flowing crimson addition to her uniform that marks her as the head of the Black Eagle class, our leader and representative. It wouldn't do, after all, to make people actually think the position of Emperor is purely a figurehead… even if that happens to be true. 

One might also be forgiven for assuming her stark white hair and small, frail-looking stature would mean that she couldn't possibly be a dangerous physical combatant, but such logic only applies to non-nobles. Real strength doesn't lie in the muscles, it lies in the blood, and a future Emperor's blood is a foolish thing to underestimate. 

Behind her is a pale figure with deep bags under his eyes and a mop of messy, black hair. I don't know him, but he openly scrutinizes me in much the same way I scrutinize him. Likely an assistant or bodyguard of some sort, with how close he clings to the future Emperor and how she seems to treat his invasion of personal space as completely banal. I give him a very slight, respectful nod, trying to be polite. His lips twist a bit upwards in response. A smile! So he's friendly. That's good. 

"I heard you were spotted escorting our final classmate, Ferdinand, but I didn't expect to find you in her room," Princess Edelgard comments, and I can't tell if her tone and body language are annoyed or amused. 

"Ah! Edelgard, hello!" the Prime Minister's son greets her brightly. "Well, since Karina here missed the official tour of the grounds, I thought that I ought to give her one so that she's not lost come tomorrow. But of course we have to deposit her luggage first, and it's important to ensure she's unpacked and comfortable in her room so that she can sleep well, and the sooner we unpack the sooner we can get to the tour, which is important so that we can finish at the dining hall at dinner time!" 

"Well that's… very thoughtful of you, Ferdinand, but it's still putting you in the same room as a girl as she puts away her underthings," Edelgard points out. 

Ferdinand turns to me, confused at first but quickly startled as he realizes I am, indeed, in the middle of transferring my underwear to the clothing cabinet, as if the act of unpacking clothes wasn't guaranteed to inevitably lead to this exact situation before the task was complete and he had no way to predict this. I'm not really sure how I'm supposed to react to that, so I don't and just continue putting things away. Is it my faux pas for pulling them out with men in the room…? I don't really care who sees my underwear, especially when I'm not even wearing it. 

"Ahem. Well. You must be Karina von Gillingr, then," Princess Edelgard says, opting to ignore whatever it is Ferdinand is now doing. And… wait. Oh, shoot. I'm probably supposed to have introduced myself to the Princess or at least acknowledged her in some way beyond sizing her up. 

"Yes, that's correct," I say, putting down what I'm holding and giving her what I think is an appropriate bow. "It's good to meet you, Princess Edelgard." 

"Now, there's no need for that," she says with a smile. "We're all classmates here. Just Edelgard is fine." 

"Edelgard, then," I confirm, rising from the bow. And then, to reciprocate: "Please call me Karina." 

"Welcome to the Black Eagles, Karina," Edelgard says. "Though the rest of us have already met and socialized a bit, I'm sure you'll be able to find a place to fit right in. It looks like we're going to be… quite the eclectic bunch, this year."

"That's… good?" I hedge, trying to figure out what a vague statement like that actually means. 

"I think it will be good," she confirms. "Though I did want to warn you that, since much of the class is already well-acquainted with each other, you may be subject to an abnormal amount of attention or questions. Just as a heads-up." 

I nod. It makes sense. 

"It isn't often that a baron's daughter gets to rub elbows with the future ministers of the Empire," I say, and then quickly realize I probably shouldn't have said that out loud. …Or at the very least, I should have included 'and the future Emperor.' But Edelgard doesn't seem outwardly offended, only giving me a considering look. 

"Perhaps," she agrees. "But I think that is only because a baron's daughter rarely has the income—and far more importantly, the skill —to pay for and be accepted to the Officer's Academy. I believe success in one's studies is the only thing that matters in a school, not rank or status. One of our classmates is even a commoner this year. I'm a little worried that she may be mistreated for it, so I hope I can rely on you to keep an eye out and help ensure no one is denying her the respect she is owed as a fellow student?"

Um. Hmm. Etiquette lessons did not prepare me for this. Why is she relying on me for this? She literally just met me. She has no reason to believe I'd be any good at the task I am being assigned. …Though likewise, she has no reason to believe I'd be bad at it. She may as well be committing to a stab against an opponent of unknown strength, which… well. No. She's not a fool. She knows this. Against an opponent of unknown strength, you explicitly don't commit. You jab, feint, and make a safe move or two to size them up and identify their weaknesses before going for the kill. 

My success or failure at this task isn't important in itself. It's important for what it tells her about me. And of course, I don't know what answer she wants me to give, so I may as well give her the truth. 

"I like that," I tell her. 

"Hmm?" she blinks. 

"'Success in one's studies is the only thing that matters in a school,'" I quote her. "We are students. Our purpose is to learn. I like that."

Things are better when they have a purpose. They make more sense to me. Purposes can be complicated and multifaceted, but as long as I understand what they are then I can figure out where I belong within them. 

"Well, I'm glad," Edelgard says. "I'm not sure that answers my question, though."

"Oh, sorry," I say. Um… how to put this. "It will be much easier for me to treat everyone like students anyway. Much less complicated. And a good student shouldn't let anything bad happen to their classmates, right?" 

Again, Edelgard's expression is a bit too complicated for me to read, but she nods and that seems like approval. 

"Yes," she agrees. "A good student shouldn't do that. Well, let me know if you're having any trouble getting situated, Karina. It's technically my job to make sure you're settling in well, not Ferdinand's." 

"It is only right for me to take some of that burden from you, Lady Edelgard," Ferdinand insists. "And I already have the entire monastery layout memorized! You can count on me to give a tour worthy of the nobility!"

"...Just don't let him drag you into anything you don't actually want to do," Edelgard sighs. "Hubert, did you need anything from Karina?"

"Not at this time," the black-haired man says, his eyes still studying me carefully. 

"Oh, goodness, I completely forgot," Edelgard says. "Karina, this is Hubert. He's also one of our classmates. I hope the two of you get along." 

"Yes," Hubert agrees, "I will be sure to have my eye on her during the coming days. I am certain we will find much to talk about. Goodbye. For now." 

"Bye," I nod back at him, pleased that he wants to talk to me. I like him. He seems nice. He and the princess depart as Ferdinand and I finish unpacking my things, the redhead babbling ceaselessly the whole time. I don't really mind it, but I also find myself unable to pay attention to it less than halfway through. It's just so many words.

"—Bernadetta's room, and while she is a bit… excitable, I think I would say, I have high hopes that the two of you could become fast friends," Ferdinand says as we exit, catching my attention with a name I recognize. "Actually, you… well, if you don't mind me saying so, you look rather similar to her! Are you perhaps related?"

"Yes. Bernadetta von Varley and I share a great-grandfather on my mother's side," I answer succinctly.

"Oh! You're quite familiar with your peerage," Ferdinand says, sounding impressed. 

"Count Varley has mentioned it to me in passing," I answer. "He seems to like saying it. And inviting my family to visit so he can remind us about it. And mentioning it in letters." 

"O-oh?" Ferdinand says hesitantly. "Well… ah. That's right, isn't it? You possess a Crest of Indech. A major one, if I recall correctly. Very rare, and normally associated with her house more than yours, yes? I believe your father has a minor crest of Cichol."

"Yes," I confirm. "Bernadetta's father once called me the 'pride of House Varley's blood.' During her tenth birthday party." 

"...Oh," Ferdinand says, the corners of his lips finally falling for the first time during the whole conversation. "So you and Bernadetta are…"

"We are already acquainted," I answer flatly. Bernadetta has never been particularly fond of me, and frankly I find her rather vexing in return. No matter how hard I try to not be frightening, the girl still runs from me. 

"I see. Well, hopefully the two of you can consider the academy a fresh start!" he says, managing to reassert his optimism almost immediately. "The Black Eagles must stand united. We represent the future of The Adrestian Empire!" 

I nod. 

"I will do my best to get along with everyone," I promise. I am supposed to make friends, after all, no matter how traditionally futile this endeavor has been. Besides, I haven't seen Bernadetta in years. Perhaps she will have a bit more spine, or at least the ability to articulate whatever it is I'm apparently doing wrong before screaming something confusing and running away. 

…Probably not, though. 

The tour of the monastery continues, and I make sure to memorize the layout as we travel. I am also introduced to other students of all three houses, but while I do my best to remember their names I know I'll have a hard time with matching that name to the person, especially if some of them share hair colors—or worse, change how they look. I'm not too worried about it, since I will be seeing them all every day and therefore have plenty of time to figure it all out, but it's definitely going to be a struggle. 

"And this is the library!" Ferdinand announces, revealing a relatively small but densely packed room full of books on every wall. "Ah, hello, Tomas! This is Karina von Gillingr. Tomas is the librarian here, Karina."

"Oh, hello there," the old man nods, a pleasant smile on his face. "Another first-year? I see you're getting a private tour after missing the official one. Very good of you, Ferdinand. I can already tell you'll do wonderfully here at the academy." 

"But of course!" Ferdinand agrees, puffing up quite happily under the praise. "Such is my noble duty!" 

"Hmm… I suppose I should go over the library rules for you," Tomas says. "But you've already heard them, Ferdinand. Would you be so kind as to send Karina back to me when you're done with your tour?"

"Why, I'd be more than happy to wait while you inform her, Tomas!" Ferdinand says. "It is no trouble." 

"No, no, I have a few things I need to take care of, first," Tomas says. "You two run along and finish things up. Just show her where my office is during the tour, hmm? Her first test can be remembering how to get back by herself!" 

Ferdinand laughs and agrees, the tour continuing until I eventually have the above-ground layout understood in my head. I've noted multiple places that look like they could lead deeper, but I probably won't need to care too much about that as a student. When Ferdinand and I make it back to my room, I thank him for the tour and wait for him to depart before heading back to Tomas' office. I knock, and make my way inside at his instruction. He smiles at me. I make sure to smile back. 

"We can speak freely here," he tells me.

I bow. 

"It is good to see you again, my creator." 

The man's body language shifts all at once, from the bone-aching slump of age to the posture of an experienced mage, ready to flick his fingers into something deadly at any moment. Personally, though, I find the casual shift of personality rather reassuring. It has been a very, very long time since I have seen Solon, and I can only think of one reason for one of the sages to be this deep into enemy territory: the time for the Agarthans to rule has come. So of course, it is time to play my part. 

How could I not be at least a little excited for that? It's what I was made for, after all.

Chapter Text

"So you could still recognize me after all this time," Solon notes. "Wonderful. Not even I noticed a reaction in your expression. You have done well, Afina."

Well, my expression doesn't move all that much in general unless I make an effort; I've been scolded about that plenty of times. Case in point, I'm immediately quite confused and I doubt that shows on my face either. The feeling passes quickly, though. Afina . Right. It has been so long since I heard that name I had honestly forgotten it was mine.

"I have entrenched my human identity, as you ordered," I answer. "Not even Karina's parents suspect a thing."

How could they? I killed her and stole her face when she was barely five years old, and I've kept to the identity ever since. I have been their daughter far longer than the 'real' Karina ever had the chance to.

"And now you have been accepted to the academy, just in time for our long-awaited plans to begin," he says, something almost like pride in his voice. "You are a true Agarthan, Afina. Let none claim otherwise."

"Thank you, sir," I answer, though I feel little joy at the praise. Which is not to say it's unwelcome, it just… is. Any pride my creator feels because of me is entirely self-directed. He created me, after all. My accomplishments are his. 

Besides, what does the praise itself matter? Many Agarthans do not consider me to be one of them because of the blood of our great enemy in my veins, and because I was born of a tank rather than a womb. My creator clearly does not share the sentiment, but I cannot say it has greatly affected me one way or another. I don't often speak to other Agarthans anyway.

"Mmm," Solon hums, something about his expression shifting. Is he… more serious? Less happy? We're transitioning out of the pleasantries, I think. "Now then, your role will be somewhat straightforward, but I would not call it easy. The princess. You are to befriend her, get her to trust you, and ideally enter her inner circle."

Oh. Well, that's a convenient order, actually. My mother already wanted me to do that anyway, and I'm glad to not need to contradict it. I nod in acknowledgment. 

"May I be briefed on the target?” I ask. 

"You may," my creator answers. "Princess Edelgard is one of our most successful post-utero Crest imbuement experiments. She possesses both a Crest of Seiros and a Crest of Flames. Unlike most of our living experiments, however, she is aware of our existence." 

I tilt my head to indicate surprise.

"On purpose?" I ask.

"Yes," Solon smiles, "on purpose. The princess is quite ambitious for her age. She does not know much, but she knows we gave her the power she wields, and she knows we oppose the Nabateans. She, too, has many reasons to despise them, and given her power among humans, we are using her in our plans. Of course, we have reason to believe that she intends to use us, and likely even try to squirm out of our grasp and enact some dull-witted betrayal. You shall place yourself in a position to prevent such foolishness while we prepare for the larger conflict."

I nod.

"I am performing noncombat asset protection and espionage," I summarize.

"Precisely," Solon confirms. "Though of course, your position as a student here will also place you in an ideal position to utilize your power when the time comes. To that end, you should endeavor to become trusted by the faculty where possible, but as your primary duty will necessitate performing well as a student regardless, that should largely be a matter of course." 

Hmm. So Edelgard is more likely to be my friend if I am a good student? That is useful information.

"Is there any other information about the target that could assist with befriending her?" I ask. 

My creator blinks, as if needing to take a moment to think of an answer. 

"She's a human," he dismisses. "I know her biology, not her personality. She's about the same age as your mask is supposed to be. The rest is your job, not mine."

I nod. So she's about two years older than my actual age. That is also useful information. 

"Thank you, my creator," I say. "I will not fail."

"I am sure you won't," he agrees. "Now as for the rest: obviously, you are not to reveal your true nature without explicit permission or a dire emergency. But conversely, it has been a very long time since I've done a proper analysis on your body. This Wednesday night, travel unseen to Remire Village. I will meet you there."

"It will be done," I nod.

He smiles again.

"Ah, it is so refreshing to have a subordinate like you after being stuck with Kronya for so long," he says. "Off with you, then. And remember: I am Tomas, a librarian you have just met, and I have simply instructed you on the rules of the library."

Oh. Hmm. I suppose I should probably ask.

"...What are the rules of the library?"

My creator seems slightly taken aback for a moment, but he lets what was once the face of a man named Tomas return to its natural kind smile, answering my question in character. It's a bit odd to see how vast the difference is. I suppose it's necessary for him; he's impersonating a man with a very different personality to himself, after all. Perhaps it's a way to help keep the identities separate. 

I'm glad I don't really have to do that. I'd be terrible at it. 

I make my way back to the dorms, lock myself in my room, and carefully spend the next two hours checking for and insulating against security weaknesses, possible assassination vectors, and other dangers. Sure enough, an extremely well-hidden eavesdropping spell turns out to be anchored to some black magic glyphs inside the wood joints. After some consideration, I decide to leave it as-is. I'm not sure who put it there, and destroying it would be far more suspicious than anything someone could overhear in my room. Once done, I head swiftly to sleep, looking forward to starting class tomorrow. 

I dream, as I often do, of scales and fire. 

As expected from what I had heard, our classroom seems to be mostly in ready condition when I arrive the next day, possessing everything one could need to start a class with the notable exception of a professor. Ferdinand told me what time to show up and to find a seat when I arrive, however, so I do so, ignoring most of the other people in the room because they aren't sitting down. The only current exception is a boy (or maybe a girl? I can't tell) with chin-length green hair. As he (or she) is clearly the most studious of the group, being the only one to follow instructions, I make sure to sit down next to them. 

They ignore me outright, likely because they are very focused, so I leave them be. 

"Sabotage?" someone mutters quietly, catching my attention. "Hubert, why would it be sabotage?"

I glance up towards the voice, spotting someone with white hair and a head-of-class uniform. That's… Edelgard, right? It must be, but I don't remember her face yet. I do remember her having an attendant with messy black hair, though, and sure enough that's who the girl is talking to. Definitely Edelgard. 

"There are too many possibilities to speculate the why, " the nice attendant—Hubert, I should remember the name Hubert —whispers back. "What matters here is the what: all three official instructors are Adrestian in origin or affiliation, but it's Jeritza, specifically, that has been denied a homeroom position."

"It's Jeritza, to be fair," Edelgard murmurs. "There could be any number of reasons that he would be replaced."

"And perhaps that's all it is, your majesty, but until we know it is prudent to at least plan for the event that…" he glances my way, trailing off as he notices me looking at him. Not wanting to be rude, I give him a polite wave. 

"...That we might have self-study today," he finishes, smiling at me. Edelgard quickly follows his gaze when he does, acting almost as if his smile is something to be concerned about. I wave at her too. Before she can respond, though, another woman in weird leggings (that might be the same leggings woman as yesterday, assuming she didn't change her clothes) enters the classroom, walking up to the lectern at the front of the class and clearing her throat.

"Byleth?" Edelgard asks. Ah, I remember that name. So she didn't change her clothes! Or she just has a bunch of pairs of those same weird leggings. "Are you in our class?"

"Yes, technically," Byleth says emotionlessly, spreading out a few papers in front of her.

"Wait, are you teaching our class?" Edelgard asks incredulously.

"I was not aware you were qualified to be an instructor," Hubert frowns.

"Me neither," Byleth answers. "But Rhea insisted I become an instructor yesterday, and apparently she's the boss around here."

I see another member of my class turn to their neighbor and mouth 'apparently?' with an utterly baffled expression. I have to admit, it's a bit strange for someone to talk like they didn't know that. Judging by many of the other reactions around me, it's probably also weird for the instructor to be decided the day before class.

"I'm afraid I must object," Hubert says. "This is highly irregular. We don't have much time to prepare for the mock battle, and an instructor with no experience will put us at a substantial disadvantage."

"I never said I had no experience," Byleth says, every last word she speaks as completely devoid of emotion as the last. "I've been part of a mercenary company for my entire life, and I've been involved in the training of fresh recruits. I'll work with what I know and pick up everything I don't know from there. To that end, welcome to our first day of class. Follow me to the training yard."

She finishes positioning all of her papers and then simply leaves them on the lectern, walking directly back out where she came in. Most of the class doesn't move, sharing baffled looks with each other until Edelgard speaks up.

"Well, you heard our instructor, I suppose," she says helplessly. "Let's go to the training yard."

A few students object to what is apparently a breach in expected classroom procedure, but a couple seem quite excited to have an instructor that 'skips right to the good stuff.' I refrain from sharing my opinion and simply follow Byleth as I am supposed to. Weird instructor or not, she is my instructor, and I must be a good student.

When everyone makes it to the practice yard and the class starts up, I find that our instructor's methods seem perfectly sensible. She starts by asking each student their current skills and the skills they would like to work on, and does a brief spar with them to determine their current level. Afterwards, she groups the students up by their chosen area of focus. Edelgard, I note, chooses to specialize in axes, so I lie and claim axes are my area of focus and the weapon I'd like to work on most. I'm substantially better with smaller, lighter thrusting weapons, like daggers and shortswords, though I occasionally venture into using longer blades if the kill calls for it. Of course, I could also claim to be a dark mage, but that's the sort of skill that would make people ask questions that I don't want to answer.

Byleth, unfortunately, seems to immediately figure out that I'm more used to swords than axes, but she doesn't seem to have any problem putting me into the axe group anyway. As long as she doesn't figure out that I'm also holding back, there likely won't be a problem. A couple other classmates join Edelgard and me, but we have a fairly decent spread of skills that people want to focus on. If Byleth seems intimidated by this, she doesn't show it; the rest of our class time centers around weapon drills and the occasional spar, with Byleth keeping a watchful eye on everyone and frequently giving out deadpan advice.

I keep a careful watch on Edelgard whenever she participates in a spar, watching how much she tenses her core and how hard she breathes. She's holding back, and while her opponents are also holding back, they seem more in line with only doing so in order to avoid injury. When it's finally time for my turn to spar with her, I ask her about it.

"Well, if I just immediately win, my classmates won't learn anything," Edelgard says, seeming somewhat surprised and flustered for being called out on it.

I lazily flourish my axe, adjusting the exact spot of my grip for the tenth time today. I'm still getting used to the unbalanced weight of the weapon, designed with more power in mind than speed. Arguably, because I usually already have a speed advantage in any engagement, the axe is a better weapon for me due to that boost in force, but I still find it awkward to wield.

"I never thought of that," I admit. I've only sparred a couple times so far, but I've ended them all very quickly. "I will do my best to help you, then."

Her face scrunches in an expression I find hard to read, but she settles into a more serious combat stance, so I take it as a good sign. I adjust my grip again, ignite the power within my blood, and rush her without further comment.

She parries, which is already more than my other sparring partners today. I can tell I've caught her off guard, but not enough to actually breach her defenses, which implies an impressive reaction speed and readiness. I'm very curious to test a fellow experiment, even if she isn't an Agarthan. Seeing her keep up with me makes me smile.

I'm still holding back, of course, but I can tell she is too. That's fine; we both have our roles to play and this fight exists within them. The crack of our wooden weapons against each other rings out through the yard over and over, our dulled blades smashing waves through the air. It's fun. I'm in my element now, dancing to a tune I know far better than any from a ballroom. Edelgard's face remains stern, though, and I'm surprised to see it progress into a frown.

"You're using your Crest in a spar?" she asks.

I blink with surprise. 

"You aren't?"

Her next swing smashes through my practice weapon in a shatter of splinters, knocking the hilt from my hand even as it separates the head from the base. The shattered weapon flies off to the side and out of the ring, forcing a few of the spectators to dodge out of its way. Edelgard levels her blade at my neck. 

"I was not," she says flatly. 

I can't help but let a huge grin crawl up my face. 

"You win," I say. "Thank you for the match."

I walk away giddy, a slight wiggle in my step as I go to collect another practice weapon and return to drills. I did it! I pushed her enough! I helped! And I had to try pretty hard, too. Edelgard is really good! I'm so glad I get to be friends with her. 

After our match, our professor's sharp blue eyes flick back and forth between Edelgard and I, though unlike with most spars, she doesn't offer any comments to either of us. 

I don't have the fortune to get paired with any of them, but there are a handful of other classmates whose skills pique my interest. I don't know their names yet, but I do my best to remember them by their weird hair and other notable features. One girl has purple hair and a purple tattoo under one eye, so she should be easy to remember. The Prime Minister's son was surprisingly skilled, though not great, and there was a boy with short, light blue hair that I'm worried I won't be able to recognize because he looks so boring. To my surprise, Bernadetta is actually quite skilled with a bow, though I don't pay too much attention to her because whenever I look her way she starts shaking like a leaf. 

The mages are all terrible, though I admit I probably have skewed standards on that front. Humans just can't cast like Agarthans can. I'm surprised to see Hubert throwing around dark magic at all, which at least makes him noteworthy, but the others are all just flailing around with fire and lightning like amateurs. 

After class, most of my peers head off to the bathhouses, but I'm not very sweaty so I head right to the dining hall. Unfortunately, the food doesn't seem to be ready yet, and I'm interested to find that one of the students from another house is helping to make the meal. I'm not much of a cook, personally, but I find it interesting to hang back and watch. Soon enough, the other students trickle in from their bath shortly before the food is ready. I guess they understand the schedule a lot better than I do. I'll follow the others tomorrow.

Today, however, I'm going to try to further my budding friendship with Edelgard. She and Hubert walk in slightly after the food is ready, neither of them looking like they bathed. I'm sure Edelgard has a lot to do as the head of house, and I've never seen Hubert leave her side outside of practice, so it's not that weird. Still, I already know she's one of our agents, and given her closeness with Hubert he's probably in on it as well. It's possible they were off colluding. I really need to become their friend as fast as possible, so when they sit down to eat together I grab my food and plop down right next to Edelgard.

"Hello," I say, and then start eating my food.

"...Hello," Edelgard says, giving me another unidentifiable look. The tables around us all start filling up, though no one sits anywhere near the three of us until Ferdinand rushes up, greets us all jovially, sits next to Hubert, and inhales his food like a wyvern before getting up and leaving not even five minutes later.

"Wow," I say, watching him go. "He eats faster than my dad."

"Yes, Ferdinand has always been… vivacious," Edelgard agrees. "Karina, yes? You seem like the sort of person with a lot of energy yourself."

"And possibly an even greater degree of impudence, if such a thing can be imagined," Hubert says. "Only the two of you would sit so boldly with the future emperor as if she were a common woman from the streets."

I blink at him. That wasn't very nice.

"Edelgard said that we're all students," I remind him.

"...She's right, Hubert, I did," Edelgard confirms. Oh! I was actually right! I was expecting to have messed that up somehow. "And I have to admit, I'm curious about you, Karina. People here don't seem to know much about you."

"Although Bernadetta did call you a 'malicious omen of doom,'" Hubert hums. "So we at least have that in common."

"I have a cousin who works here!" I say. "My dad's brother's daughter is a member of the Knights of Seiros. Though I haven't seen her in a while, she never visits anymore. I kinda want to go find her but my mom said I shouldn't bother her while she's working."

I don't comment on Bernadetta because I really don't have any idea what to say. It's nice to have something in common with Hubert, though, even if I have no idea why Bernadetta feels that way. I hope it's not because she's sensitive to dark magic or something, but as far as I know that's not a thing humans can be.

"Do you have a close relationship with your family, then?" Edelgard asks.

"I don't really have much experience interacting with people outside my family, actually," I admit. "It's mostly just us and the servants, and they don't talk with me much. I don't even get to talk to the soldiers when I join them to hunt for monsters and bandits. So I'm really looking forward to making friends here!"

"And you decided to start with the princess?" Hubert hums, a small smile on his face. "Ambitious. I hope you understand that I will be keeping a very careful eye on both your past and your present. I can't allow anyone to associate with her if they harbor… less than noble intentions."

"Well, I am a noble," I point out. I'm not worried about any of the other parts. He won't find anything, even if he knows exactly what to look for. Background discrepancies? There are none, because I have subverted an entirely real identity. Sudden shifts in personality? There will be no testimonies to that nature, because my target was far too young for them to be considered odd, and they are now long forgotten. My lack of a childhood is the advantage I hold over natural-born Agarthans: while they are forced to supplant already-established identities, a simple decade and a half of investment allowed me to create a truly perfect cover to infiltrate this monastery. Even if every other Agarthan gets rooted out, there is no way to do so to me.

It is impossible to prove that I am not Karina von Gillingr, because the true reality is that I am.

"I don't think that's what he meant," Edelgard says, glancing sidelong at Hubert. "And I am perfectly capable of deciding my friends for myself, thank you."

"Of course," Hubert allows easily, like it's an exchange they've had a thousand times.

"You should decide to be my friend!" I tell her, not one to waste an opportunity. I make sure to put my best smile on my face as I say it, too.

"Well, I have to admit, she certainly has a much more direct strategy for social climbing than the average fare," Hubert says. "There is a certain advantage to being utterly and completely tactless."

"Hubert, please," Edelgard grumbles. "This is exactly why no one sits with us."

"That is the idea, yes."

"Don't worry, he can't scare me away," I declare. "My dad is way meaner. He insults people and hits them and stuff all the time."

Edelgard and Hubert share a look.

"I… see," Edelgard says. "Well, I would be happy to be friends with you, Karina."

"Provisionally, unless some sort of unfortunate accident occurs," Hubert smiles.

Yes! Oh wow, that was way easier than I was afraid of. Now I just have to become trusted enough to enter her inner circle. Easy peasy.

Man, I am so good at espionage.

Chapter Text

It feels strange doing magic again after so long. I haven't associated my identity with dark magic for fairly obvious reasons, so it's a little like stretching a muscle I haven't used for so long that it's grown sore. I'm not even using grand or impressive magic, at least not yet. I'm just activating a simple haunting hex, one that I started setting up yesterday. It should replay all the sounds I made while sleeping last night over the course of the next six hours or so. My room is being monitored, after all, and only a terribly ineffective spy wouldn't notice silence.

It's Wednesday, and I have been ordered to visit my creator without being seen.

This, too, is like stretching an old muscle. This late at night, it's unlikely that I will encounter anyone other than standard monastery guards, and they should be fairly easy to avoid. But the enemy of stealth is always the unexpected, so I stay slow and careful as I slink my way through the grounds. I can't risk warping out while inside enemy territory. That kind of thing is a lot more noticeable than a simple hex.

It feels nice, though. Doing this again. It's what I was made for, and so I'm very good at it. I carry no lantern with me, relying on hearing and smell to detect everyone nearby before they have a chance to see me. Even wearing the body of my disguise, my senses are far above what any human could match. Soon enough, I'm outside the monastery gates and heading down the side of the mountain. Once I'm a few miles away I should be safe to warp, but until then I just enjoy the clear night air. When it's finally time to teleport, I cast the spell slowly and carefully, making sure I remember how as I complete each step. The mental calculations click into place like a well-made crossbow, and before I know it I am somewhere very far away.

Remire Village looks nothing like the sort of place I would expect Solon to ask me to meet up with him, but I suppose that heading all the way back to Shambhala would be impractical and slightly unwise. I'm not entirely certain exactly where he is, though, so I just start stalking the streets until I feel the familiar pull of his magic. I knock on the door to an unassuming shed near the edge of town, and a hunched old man wearing the same outfit as the monastery librarians answers the door.

"Ah, come in, come in!" he says, and I recognize the voice. My creator orders me in the guise of Tomas, and I obey. A trapdoor at the bottom of the shed is quickly opened up to lead us into a large underground laboratory, where Agarthan technology hums against the walls as open vats of alchemical concoctions and great tomes of magical knowledge fill the rest of the room.

"This is unexpectedly robust," I can't help but comment. Even Solon would be grossly punished for allowing anything in this laboratory to fall into human hands. 

"It is necessary for my work," my creator answers, his true form revealing itself in a flash. Solon did not decide on a terrible disguise for himself. In addition to the obvious trust that the identity of Tomas grants him, they are surprisingly similar in appearance. Of course, Solon is not human; though he is an old man, the modifications done to his body have dramatically enlarged the size of his cranium, and multiple non-biological augmentations are present around his head and face.

"Now, show yourself to me, Afina. It has been a long time since you have had a proper checkup."

I nod, taking a short moment to remember how to do as he asks. I realize, thinking about it now, that I don't actually know what my true form will look like anymore. I have not been in it since I was much, much smaller. Did it grow alongside my body? Does it remain a stunted child? I am not entirely sure, because while my real body would normally age along with my disguise, my real body is so draconic in nature that it may not age at the same rate.

Still, I soon remember how to reveal myself, and it is like letting out a breath I did not realize I was holding, an unexpected relief from a long-forgotten pain in my lungs. My vision is blinded in a flash of green, and I stagger and nearly fall down, an unexpected imbalance in my weight causing me to almost topple over. I stub my fingers as I catch myself, meeting with the ground sooner than expected. Dang, am I really still small? I thought… wait, no.

I didn't get smaller. My arm just got bigger.

"Hmm. A minor bit of demonic corruption, but overall you are acclimating better than expected," Solon comments. I stagger back to my feet, pulling a dozen year's worth of hair growth out from in front of my face. Solon starts walking in a circle around me as I look down at myself, flexing two very different sets of fingers.

I no longer look like the human I pretend to be, not even able to pass as a slightly sickly looking one, like most Agarthans. My left arm is dramatically larger than it used to be, half again as long and almost twice as thick, covered in dark gray, fiber-like growth that reminds me of exposed muscle. The arm's fingers curl into long, sharp claws, each a dagger unto themselves, and while my right arm is the same size as before it is no more humanoid. The entirety of its length is armored with gray scutes, rough and charred in a way that Karina's skin never could be. That hand also has claws, though they are more modest, designed less for gouging deep into prey and more for traction. Those lighter gray scutes cover the majority of the front of my body, while the darker gray of my left arm curls into large keratin scales down my back.

I feel a foreign weight as I twist my neck around to look, reaching carefully up around my head and pulling my green hair out of the way again to find a variety of horns growing out of my skull. Two large horns emerge from each of my temples, curving threateningly forward, while a third joins them from my forehead. Three much smaller spiky growths are starting to protrude out of the bottom of my chin. As I continue looking behind myself, however, the other source of my lack of balance becomes apparent: a long tail, split between lighter and darker gray, brushes against the floor.

It's all a bit uncomfortable to look at, far more corrupted by the draconic blood in my veins than I ever imagined possible. Even my hair has changed to match the color of the human guise of the Nabateans. I attempt to channel the power of my Agarthan heritage, just to make sure I can, and the series of thin, pointed spines along my back and tail start to glow a bright orange in response, the strength flowing through me with a relieving ease.

"Ah, good, I was just about to ask you to do that," Solon hums. "I see you have been very diligent about remaining in your disguise. Cut your hair for me, samples of it may be useful."

I'm thankful for the order, not wanting to walk around with six feet of hair any longer than I have to. I grasp it all in my draconic hand and then cleanly slice it off at around chin-length using one of the fingers on my beastly hand. The imbalance is a little odd, but not that different to using a sword or axe one-handed. I can get used to it, and fight if needed. I give Solon the hair bundle, which he wraps up and stores in a jar.

The next few hours are a long sequence of tests, from magical scans to physical measurements. It's a little painful when my creator starts extracting tissue samples, but the Nabatean parts of me heal quickly and the corrupted parts heal even faster. I am strong in this body, dramatically stronger than I ever imagined myself being, but it feels stiff and awkward. I have no idea what to do about having a tail; I keep forgetting about it and nearly tripping over it, if not outright stepping on it myself. My proprioception hasn't been able to adjust to a body so substantially different from the one I'm used to.

I have been instructed not to reveal myself outside of an order or emergency, though, so I will simply have to adapt when the time comes. I do my best to get used to myself during the tests, but Solon is done with me before I feel confident about myself.

"As suspected, the blood has naturalized to you," Solon says. "Though your body clearly hasn't adapted evenly, you have passed the point where we would expect it to drive you mad. There may still be the danger of sympathetic corruption, but The Immovable still lives up to his name in our prison. If he starts to show signs of insanity, we should be able to kill him before it infects you."

I nod, not having a particularly strong opinion about any of that. It's good to know I'm sane, I suppose. I occasionally worry that I don't see the world right, the way people react to me sometimes.

"That will be all, then," Solon says. "It's best you get back before anyone notices you are missing."

I nod again and close my eyes, trying to remember how to put my face back on. The thought of not being able to terrifies me, but I know the body I use far better than my real one. Every crease, every freckle, every detail from head to toe. It must always be perfect, and it has been for a dozen years. It will be again.

The strange, uneven weight vanishes. The urge to twist and flick my tail vanishes along with the tail itself. I am no longer a beast of scale and muscle, built for war. I am Karina, and I must make sure that I get some sleep before class tomorrow.

"Goodbye, my creator," I tell Solon.

"Bring me pride, my creation," Solon answers.

Sneaking into the monastery is only slightly more difficult than sneaking out of it was. The church relies much on its mountains and walls to remain impregnable, but I enjoy scaling both. It is a significant workout, one that leaves me sweating by the time I make it back to the officer academy grounds, but the ache is the pleasant sort that will quickly lull me to sleep in my bed. I make my way to return to my room and do just that, but an unexpected voice forces me to hide behind a nearby corner instead.

"We've located the Holy Tomb, but I estimate it will take a few months to map out enough of the underground to actually prepare an assault. It's not the sort of place we can simply warp inside without preparation."

Oh, I know this voice. He's speaking very, very quietly, but I can still tell that it's Hubert.

"There's no need to rush it," another voice whispers back. Oh! It's Edelgard! I see, she is conspiring. Neat. "It's not as though the corpse is going anywhere. I'm just worried what Those Who Slither In The Dark are going to do with it."

Those who what now? Who are they?

"With the supposed corpse of a god?" Hubert sneers. "I do not know. Perhaps they merely wish to desecrate her, but considering that they already possess the power to bestow the Crest of Flames, I doubt it will be a small thing. Still, it has been over a thousand years since the goddess has supposedly died. I can't imagine the genuine article is actually just sitting inside a hollow rock beneath our feet. I suspect their true goal is something else in the mausoleum entirely."

Hmm. This doesn't seem like the sort of conversation they should be having out in the open. They're far too quiet for any human to be able to hear them without being close enough to be seen, but surely they know this monastery is not home exclusively to humans? As my allies and friends, perhaps I should assist with improving their paranoia.

I stretch my back and let out a loud yawn as I turn the corner, glancing towards Edelgard and Hubert and being happy to note their excellently neutral faces. Neither of them looks as though they have been plotting treason seconds earlier, with no hint of the wide-eyed stare humans usually do when caught doing something they shouldn't. Edelgard cut off her response the moment I yawned, and she and Hubert both just look like a pair of friends going on a nighttime walk. I guess they aren't as bad at this as I feared.

"...Karina?" Edelgard asks, squinting at me in the dark.

"Oh, hello," I say, letting out a slightly smaller yawn.

"My my, what are you doing out alone on a night like this?" Hubert asks, giving me one of his usual smiles.

"It's pretty out," I say matter-of-factly. Oh, wait, I'm sweaty. That should be part of my cover. "I like training on nights like this. It's easier to push yourself when it's cooler outside."

"That's very dedicated of you," Edelgard praises. I smile at her.

"Thank you," I tell her honestly. "I am not sure I agree, though. I like to train. I like to fight. Is it dedication if I am just doing it because I like it? I think dedication is for things that are hard to do."

"Oh?" Hubert asks. "Well then, by your definition, are you a dedicated person, Karina?"

"Yep," I say. "What about you?"

Hubert's smile gets wider. I hardly ever see humans smile that wide, especially while keeping their lips closed.

"I consider dedication to be one of my greatest attributes," he says. "It is always useful to have someone who can do what needs to be done, and I strive to be ever useful."

"Good job," I tell him. "So what are you two doing out here?"

"I often struggle to sleep, actually," Edelgard says, sounding impressively honest. "Hubert is simply kind enough to accompany me sometimes, so I do not get too caught up in my own thoughts."

I nod approvingly. That's a pretty good cover. It's always good for your reason to be infinitely reusable, if it's something you intend to continue doing.

"I am awake a lot too," I say. "If Hubert is not available, you are welcome to find me or knock on my door. I will walk with you, too."

It seems like the only sensible offer as her friend, after all.

"Um… thank you, Karina, that is a very generous offer," Edelgard says slowly. "It is quite late, though. If you've been training all night, you should probably get at least a few hours of rest before class tomorrow."

"Mmm. Okay. Goodnight, Edelgard. Goodnight, Hubert."

I wave goodbye at them and resume my journey to the dorms. Another successful interaction! I am very happy about how well everything is going. Before I'm entirely out of earshot, though, I hear the whispers start up again.

"...She's a threat," Hubert compliments me.

"Hubert," Edelgard sighs. "Please don't do anything impulsive. What is your problem with her?"

"I've had a feeling about her since I first saw her, and now I'm confident," Hubert says. "It's the way she walks. She knows how to step across loose terrain without leaving footprints. Every step she takes is silent. She has killed before, Lady Edelgard. She could do it again without hesitation."

"Are we not the same?" Edelgard asks.

"My lady, we are a threat."

Edelgard sighs.

"She's not going to murder us on school grounds, Hubert. And she already told us that she has hunted and killed bandits. It is not strange for a young noble of the Empire to know the art of war. Everyone here, when we leave these walls, will be a killer. Will you threaten our entire class with poison and spells simply because they know how to work a blade? You have been overprotective since the moment we got here, and while I understand the need, it is part of my purpose here to present myself as a desirable leader to my people. If she is truly as dangerous as you say, is that not all the more reason to be friendly with her?"

"I see. Forgive me, Lady Edelgard, it is as you say. I will do all I can to avoid reducing the people's opinion of you. I should have known better than to allow my suspicions to be publicly associated with you."

"...That does not at all sound like you are intending to drop this behavior," Edelgard says.

"Your safety, Lady Edelgard, is always my utmost concern. Perhaps I will feel better when the investigations on her have concluded, and I know better which category of killer to place her in. Currently, she reminds me altogether too much of Jeritza."

"Need I remind you that Jeritza is our ally?"

"Lady Edelgard, protecting you from our 'allies' is nearly three-quarters of my workload."

Edelgard doesn't seem to have anything to say to that, because her only response is silence. I continue walking and return to my room, destroying any trace of the haunting hex as I fall into bed. Wow. Hubert is a better actor than I thought. I had no idea that he didn't like me!

I'll have to come up with a foolproof plan to become his friend. I probably can't convince him that I'm harmless, since I'm not, but if he's good at reading people he should be able to tell that I really want to be his friend! Hmm. Is that not enough? Well, if he's worried about me being a killer, I could just prove I'm a killer on his side.

I bet assassins come after the future emperor all the time. If I gut enough of them, maybe Hubert will like me.

Chapter Text

I flip the wooden practice axe in my arm, recatching it by the hilt trying to get my body used to the weight. I have been training with axes for the better part of a month now, so I'm confident I can perform adequately, but old habits are hard to break. I still sometimes find myself trying to move as if I had a sword or dagger.

"Claude will absolutely have some sort of trick up his sleeve," Edelgard tells our instructor, "so it will likely be best to rush him before he can do too much setup. The problem is that Dimitri will know this as well, and he has the patience to simply wait and allow us to defeat Claude for him, cleaning up afterwards. Fighting him while exhausted would not be a good idea."

It's a reasonable assessment. Claude von Riegan, the head of the Golden Deer house, is infamously tricky and clever, enough so that even I've heard all about it. Meanwhile, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd, crown prince of the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus and head of the Blue Lion house, is just… well. Really, really strong. 

"Then we have to hit both," Instructor Byleth says. "We disrupt Claude with one group and harass Dimiti with the second so that he won't be fresh when our forces combine."

"That's quite a reckless strategy, isn't it?" Edelgard asks. "Sending only half our forces at either of them is a bit arrogant."

"No," Byleth says. "You can do it. I will be supporting you in the field."

"But we will also be up against the other instructors," Edelgard points out.

"I'm better than them," Byleth says. "And you are too. We can do it."

Edelgard blinks, her face turning the slightest bit red.

"Well, if you truly have so much faith in us, I suppose I can't object," she concedes. "We will hit both. May I request to be part of the squad that attacks Claude? I've really been wanting to punch him."

"Sure," Byleth nods. "I will lead the group to attack Dimitri. Ferdinand, Karina, Linhardt, and Hubert, you're with me. Everyone else, you're under Edelgard's command."

"Instructor Byleth, I must protest," Hubert speaks up. "I would be more effective alongside Edelgard."

"No," Byleth says. "Linhardt and Dorothea cannot be on the same team because they're our healers. You shouldn't be on the same team as Dorothea because you're our magical artillery. Therefore, you and Linhardt have to be together. Linhardt shouldn't be on the same team as Caspar because they always bicker, but Caspar should be on the same team as Edelgard because she's the only one he won't argue with. I can't put Bernadetta on a team with either you or Karina, and I can't put Karina on the same team as Edelgard because they're our best axe users now that Caspar is switching to cestus."

"Wait, but that—"

"Also, you and Edelgard spend too much time with each other and you need to get to know your other classmates better."

"Hey, we don't bicker!" Caspar says.

" You certainly bicker," Linhardt yawns.

"Okay, let's move," Byleth orders, and there's no more time for protests. We form into squads and rush off into the forest.

"Karina, do you think you could take Dimitri?" Byleth asks.

I think about that for a moment. I could probably assassinate Dimitri, but in a fair fight? He would definitely have the advantage if I'm stuck in human form. The Royal Crest of the Kingdom of Faerghus is one of the most powerful there is, and I'm not even using a weapon I'm particularly familiar with.

"Not alone," I conclude. And then, seeing my opportunity, "But I could if Hubert backs me up."

Hubert looks my way, his lips turned down in what is probably an unhappy expression. Byleth glances between the two of us, her face as unmoving as always, but after a brief silence, she nods.

"That makes sense," she nods. "I think you're right. We will support the two of you and attempt to give you a clear line to Dimitri."

I suppose while I have the chance, I should try to endear myself to the professor a little more.

"What if we sneak around and ambush him through the trees instead?" I suggest. "Hubert can send a message to Linhardt when we are in position, so that we can engage from both sides."

Byleth is silent as she weighs the idea.

"…It's a good idea, but we have no way of knowing how difficult the terrain will make that plan," she points out. "We know Dimitri's starting position, but nothing prevents him from assembling his forces somewhere else."

"I find that unlikely," Hubert says. "As Edelgard said, he is a patient man, but more than that he is stubborn. He will fortify his position, not attempt to move."

"Okay, we'll try it then," Byleth nods. "Break off from us and head around to the right."

Then, a second later, she tenses up and speaks again.

"Never mind, go left."

"Is there something to the right?" Ferdinand asks.

"Claude's army is to the right," Byleth says. "We wouldn't want to accidentally run into his troops."

Well, it doesn't matter much to me either way. I veer off the road into the forest to the left, trusting Hubert to follow me. The mage is nowhere near as quick as I am, but he's almost as quiet, making him the ideal partner for an attack like this. Petra would have been good too, but she's with Edelgard.

"Your attempts to get me somewhere secluded are not particularly subtle," Hubert admonishes.

"Sorry," I say. "I'm not sure how I should have made it more subtle, but I'll try to do better next time."

"Well, it's refreshing to know you intend for there to be a next time," Hubert says flatly. "So, did you have something you wanted to speak to me about, Miss von Gillinger?"

"Yeah, um…" Let's see, making friends, making friends. "How have you been lately?"

"Fine, thank you," he says. "Please do not waste my time."

Okay. No small talk. That's okay. That makes things easier.

"Has anybody tried to assassinate Edelgard?" I ask. "I've been looking, but I haven't caught anyone."

"Have you now," Hubert says, the corners of his mouth turning down again.

"Is that… bad?" I ask. "I just wanted to help."

"And whyever would you wish to help with something like that?" Hubert asks.

"…Shouldn't preventing the assassination of the future Emperor be the duty of any noble?" I ask hesitantly. "I don't understand why this is confusing."

"Well, setting aside the countless nobles who most assuredly do not agree with your idea of duty, perhaps I should rephrase the question. Where did you obtain the skills to help with something like that? If Gillingr territory has been ripe with assassination attempts, I have yet to be informed."

Well yeah, how could I assassinate anyone there? Killing people in my own territory is just legal.

"My father raised me to serve the Empire in any way necessary," I answer. "He was very strict with me. He wanted to make sure I got to go to Garreg Mach."

"Well, here you are," Hubert says. "Mission accomplished."

Oh. Huh. I guess he's right. I did accomplish a mission. I mean, it's more like one of the steps to a mission, but… well, no. It's one of the steps to the mission my creator gave me, but it is the mission my family gave me. So that's actually pretty great.

"…Thank you," I tell him, doing my best to smile. "Anyway, a while back I heard you talking to Edelgard about me, and I'm a little worried you don't like me, but I want you to like me. What should I do to get you to like me?"

He lets out a somewhat forceful sigh.

"It is not a matter of whether or not I 'like' you, Karina von Gillingr," he says. "I will admit, all of the research I have done on your house supports your claims of loyalty to the imperial family. Your father is a bit of a drunkard, as I suppose you likely know. He's not a terribly difficult man to get information out of."

"I do know," I nod solemnly. "He's usually good enough not to speak out around people he doesn't trust, but that's hardly infallible. He gets drunk at home often enough for some servants to have overheard something."

"Then you know he thinks highly of you," Hubert hums. "I believe the praise he espouses most often when you are brought up is 'obedient.'"

"I am that," I nod, pleased that he noticed.

"Would you be willing to obey me, Karina von Gillingr?" he asks. "I may be willing to put aside the question of where you gained your skills if you resolve to use them in the service of your Emperor's needs."

Oh. He said 'Emperor.' Not 'future Emperor.' I'm in a conspiracy! Yes!

"That's a lie, isn't it?" I ask. "You definitely won't put that aside. That would just be weird."

His lips curl upwards. Double yes! I'm doing it! I'm friend-making!

"Well then," he asks, "will you do it for no personal benefit whatsoever?"

"I'll do it to be your friend!" I tell him. "And Edelgard's friend! What do you need me to do?"

"That, I will tell you after the mock battle," he says. "Don't seek me out. I'll find you."

"Okay," I nod.

"Also, stop insisting on sitting next to us when we eat."

"No deal!" I tell him. "My mom says that if you're trying to improve your relationship with someone, you should share a meal together! Besides, Edelgard says it's okay if I eat with her."

" Lady Edelgard is merely too polite to tell you off," Hubert says.

"You think so?" I say. "I'll ask her. Anyway, let me know the first thing you want me to do whenever!"

He sighs, shaking his head.

"For now, let us just focus on the mock battle. We musn't embarrass our class with failure."

I nod, returning to silence. We should be getting close enough to the target that any more speaking would be an unnecessary risk, anyway. We slink through the underbrush together, careful to avoid disturbing as many plants as possible as we approach the back line of the clearing. Hubert signals me to engage when ready, as the rest of the class is in position.

Carefully, slowly, we approach our target. Prince Dimitri hasn't been a complete fool, and the forest behind his position has a few traps designed to try and catch people sneaking up on him, but it's nothing Hubert and I can't disarm or avoid. Once Dimitri is in our sight (or at the very least, some blonde guy wearing Dimitri's armor), Hubert sends Linhardt the signal, and I charge.

For distance like this, I would prefer to just throw a dagger at the back of his head and be done with it, but I haven't completed my training with throwing axes and the one I'm wielding isn't weighted for it besides. All I can do is rush him as quickly as possible without making any noise, but Dimitri proves himself no ameteur fighter, detecting my presence before I can get in the first swing and turning to face me.

"Ambush!" he calls out for the rest of his team, thrusting his lance towards me to hold me at bay. I shift my head to the side to dodge the blow, but the thunder of air pressure that crackles by me nearly disrupts my footing all on its own. He's even stronger than I thought!

Fortunately, before Dimitri can capitalize on catching me off-guard, a sphere of dark magic sent by Hubert flies over my shoulder and forces him to jump away. I keep up my assault, trying to force myself inside the range of his spear without getting too exhausted from trying to parry Dimitri's devastating blows. Finally, thanks to Hubert harrying him, I see my opportunity, activating my Crest and rapidly closing the distance to carve him up with my axe. Faster than I expected, though, Dimitri intercepts me with the butt of his spear, seemingly unsurprised by my sudden burst in speed. The blunt end of his weapon causes substantial damage to my organs, but I brace myself through the pain and complete my swing into Dimitri's chest. He staggers back from the blow, and then Hubert finishes him off with a burst of dark magic from beneath his feet.

…Well, he doesn't actually finish Dimtri off. This is just a mock battle, after all. It would be bad if someone actually died. Ahead of us, Professor Byleth and the rest of our squad are carving through what remains of Dimitri's forces. Byleth has just won a duel with the Blue Lions professor, and Dimitri calling out an ambush caused half of his forward forces to try and rush back to defend him, letting us break their formation and catch the defenders as they retreat. All in all, the plan went incredibly smoothly. It's almost a little disappointing.

From there, my participation in the mock battle has effectively completed. We move to reinforce Edelgard's squad against Claude, but the battle is nearly over by the time we get there and I don't get the chance to do anything. The exercise ends, and the Black Eagles are deemed the winner.

Everyone seems very excited by that, and it's difficult to not have a similar elation run up through my body along with them. Byleth hosts a celebratory dinner in the mess hall, cooking an enormous variety of dishes to cater to everyone's favorites and somehow managing to eat a full-sized portion of all of them herself. I'm not really sure I have a favorite dish, and even if I did it would be more important to eat with Edelgard anyway, which is what I do!

"So, the two of you took down Dimitri together, did you?" Edelgard smiles. "Excellent work."

"Thank you Edelgard!" I beam. "I couldn't have done it without Hubert!"

"It's true, she couldn't have," Hubert agrees blandly.

"Oh, that's right!" I remember. "Hubert said you don't want to eat with me but you're too polite to say so. Is that true?"

I am actually a little worried about that. If it really is true, there's no way I would have noticed. I've been getting better at noticing how people feel if they're being honest about it, or at least I think I am, but catching someone lying? No way. It's all just subtle facial expressions and tones and stuff and I don't get it at all.

"Hubert!" Edelgard admonishes him. "No, Karina, I don't mind at all. I do wish more people would come and sit with us, rather than just you, the professor, and Ferdinand, but I suppose everyone already has their other friends."

"Dorothea doesn't," I answer. "I don't think Bernadetta does either, though I think she sometimes sneaks around to talk with people from other houses. Hey, Bernadetta!"

"Waaagh!" Bernadetta yelps as I shout across the room for her. "What is it!? What did I do!? Please don't hurt me!"

"Okay!" I shout back. "Wanna come sit with us?"

Bernadetta screams and runs out of the dining hall. I decide to take that as a no.

"Darn," I say. "Well hopefully Dorothea will—"

I stop talking as Edelgard stands up and puts a hand on my shoulder.

"How about I go invite her?" she offers, and then walks off to do so before I can answer. A minute or so later, the two of them return, chatting about some kind of opera house.

"Hmm. You actually convinced her to make the first move," Hubert hums. "Perhaps not intentionally, but…"

"Is that good?" I ask. "Did I do good?"

"I suppose we shall see," he responds noncommittally.

"Hey, everyone," Dorothea waves as she and Edelgard reach the table. "Is it alright if I sit here?"

"I was the one who—"

"By all means," Hubert cuts me off.

I scrunch my eyebrows at him. How rude!

"—wanted to invite you in the first place," I finish. "Because you don't seem to have any friends."

Edelgard cringes and Hubert glowers at me. What? What did I say? For her own part, Dorothea just chuckles a little.

"I suppose I've just been a little intimidated by all the fancy nobles around," she answers.

"What do you mean?" I ask. "I see you talking with nobles all the time. Usually boys. But you don't seem to like any of them."

"Oh my goodness—Karina!" Edelgard admonishes me. "Sorry about her. She's… like this."

"No, it's fine," Dorothea insists, sitting down at our table. "It's not like she's wrong. What's a commoner girl to do at a fancy noble school like this if not secure herself a future? So when the future Emperor herself walks over to make friends, well… how could I say no?"

Dorothea winks at Edelgard. Edelgard blushes a little.

"Well, you're certainly up-front about your motives," Hubert comments.

"I'm just expressing interest," Dorothea insists. "It's up to Edie whether or not she reciprocates."

Hubert puffs up, his body tensing with disapproval as Dorothea says 'Edie.' Edelgard just blushes a little harder.

"A-anyway," she stammers, clearing her throat. "Your performance during the mock battle today was exemplary. I'm curious to know where you learned how to cast magic between all your time performing at the opera house."

"Professor Manuela taught me, actually," Dorothea says. "She was my mentor at the opera house for a lot of things. I was sort of hoping she would be our homeroom teacher, but I guess Byleth is pretty interesting too."

"She is, isn't she?" Edelgard muses. "A mercenary comes out of seemingly nowhere, saves my life, becomes a professor at the most prestigious academy on the continent with absolutely no prior credentials or experience, and then seemingly excels at it. Not to mention cooking, fishing, gardening, and of course using nearly every weapon under the sun. Quite the polymath, that one."

"I hear she's been getting Professor Hanneman to teach her magic as well," Dorothea says. "She seemed very upset when I had a question she couldn't answer, and I've seen her going to his office nearly every day since."

"One certainly cannot fault her dedication," Hubert nods. "Even I'm a little baffled about how she manages it all. She always seems to be in the right place at the right time."

"It's kind of creepy, honestly," Dorothea frowns. "Like don't get me wrong, she's a great professor, but something just sets off my weirdo alarm when an adult with a dead fish stare invites me out to tea and they've already set out my favorite blend before I even arrive. I've literally never talked to her about tea before, but she didn't seem surprised when I told her."

"To be fair, that could just be the dead fish stare," Edelgard posits. "If she ever gets surprised, she doesn't show it. I never have any idea what that woman is thinking."

"Indeed," Hubert agrees. "It is most vexing."

"Want me to spy on her?" I ask.

Everyone turns to stare at me. Did they not hear me, or something?

"I said do you want me to—mmgh!"

"Quiet!" Hubert snaps, covering my mouth. "Don't say something like that out loud."

Note to self: write it down next time.

"I don't think there's any need for anything that… extreme, Karina," Edelgard says.

"I'd be interested in what you can find out," Dorothea answers. The other two turn to look at her. "What? She seemed so excited when she offered. And you can't tell me you don't want to know Byleth's secrets."

"I'm just not quite so sure we should be encouraging this sort of behavior," Edelgard hedges.

"Oh come on, Edie, you're going to be the Emperor ," Dorothea prods her. "You can't tell me you aren't going to have any need for spymasters. Let the girl have fun."

Edelgard tenses up a little at that, pursing her lips and declining to respond. 

"I'll do a really good job!" I promise. "I am great at espionage!"

"See Edie?" Dorothea grins. "She's great at it. Nothing to worry about."

"I… suppose I won't stop you, if that's what you want to do," Edelgard eventually answers. "But do try to not get into any trouble."

"Okay, Edie!" I beam.

"No!" Hubert says. "I cannot allow you to address the future Emperor so casually! It's not—where are you going?"

"We just talked about where I'm going," I answer. "Heyyyy! Professor Byleth!"

I wander off, leaving them all gaping at me with various unreadable expressions. I'm going to do so great at this, and everyone is going to be super impressed! Then they'll have to be my friends!

Chapter Text

After several weeks of observation, I am finally confident in delivering a final analysis of my current target, Professor Byleth Eisner. In summary: she's really, really weird. 

People call me weird. I know that. But Byleth is that unique kind of strange that's identifiable no matter how detached one happens to be from the standards of humanity. I make a constant effort to fit in, and while that effort has… mixed results, Byleth doesn't put that effort in at all . 

"Is it too straining?" Byleth asks the wall of her own room. The wall, predictably, does not respond. 

"I don't see what makes this more trivial than battle," Byleth continues after a pause, as if someone had said something in the silence. I watch from the hole I've carefully placed in one of the corners, trying to think of ways my professor could potentially not be insane. I've already disassembled her room three times confirming she has no long-distance communication runes or speaking artifacts inside. The content of what she says rules out the idea that she's merely dictating things out loud to assist with her own thought processes. She is, almost certainly, speaking with someone who does not exist.

"Improper preparation for battle is just as likely to result in death as mistakes within battle," Byleth argues. There's another pause, and she frowns. "I'm just being efficient. Why not gain the added information?" 

She doesn't always do this. Most days, she quickly dresses herself in her weird tights and revealing top and gets to work immediately, acting with a level of precision that reminds me more of the automatons of Shambhala than a living, breathing being. And maybe she is an automaton, because even when I put my ear all the way up to her chest while she slept, I've still never once heard her heartbeat. 

I have no idea what she is, and it's equal parts worrying and exciting. 

"Fine. This will be the last for today." 

A pause.

"Yes. Thank you."

She finishes putting on her jacket despite the fact that its sleeves just hang around and don't even work and exits her room, walking by Petra's dorm the moment the girl exits. The two of them exchange a few words which I stay too far back to listen to—Petra is one of the few people who might actually see me—and then Byleth gives Petra an entire bag of smoked meat before walking away. I can't really read Petra's expression but my best guess is 'thankful' because that was a really awesome gift.

That's one of the things about Byleth: she always gives really nice gifts. I got a very high-quality whetstone from her last month, and everyone else in the class got their own personalized gifts, too. I can't wait for this month's. 

She heads to the greenhouse, rapidly tending to every plant in a practiced, efficient order. Then she goes to the pier, buys some bait, catches eight fish in under ten minutes (Not even with her hands! Just a pole and string! How!?) and drops them off with the cooks at the mess hall before wandering down to the market and haggling for better equipment to hand out to the class, much of which she clearly uses her own money for. Only then does she head to the mess hall for breakfast, arriving almost immediately after the fish she supplied have finished cooking. 

It's insane, but I can't say I don't respect it. Professor Byleth is… well, honestly, she's really cool. And a lot of the students from other houses are starting to take note. 

"You're certain about transferring to our house?" Edelgard asks… Lysithea? Or Lysithea asks Edelgard? They look so similar I'm always getting them confused. Wait, Edelgard wears red, though! So the one who just spoke is definitely Edelgard. I sit down across from them, chewing on our breakfast of freshly cooked fish with delighted satisfaction. The bones are so crunchy!

"I'm certain," the girl who is probably Lysithea confirms. Yes, her voice is higher pitched and she's about ten centimeters shorter. Definitely Lysithea. "I've officially submitted the transfer, in fact. I'm just waiting for Professor Byleth to approve it." 

"Approved," Byleth says in her usual monotone, slapping a stamped sheet of paper down in front of Lysithea as she walks past. "I'll see you in class tomorrow. I want you and Hubert to meet with each other sometime today so he can get you up to speed on the magic curriculum." 

"Understood, Professor," Hubert nods.

"Yes ma'am?" Lysithea says like it's a question, probably a little surprised with Byleth's timing. I no longer get surprised by Byleth's timing. I know better. 

I also know better than to ask why Lysithea and Edelgard look almost exactly the same (at least to me; I suppose no one else seems to confuse them) even though it's really really obvious that both of them want to ask each other. After all, I know they're both Crest experiment survivors, and I'm supposed to not know that so it would be good if I never involve myself in a conversation about it. The best way to not get caught lying is to avoid situations where you'd need to lie.

Byleth is already walking away by the time everyone else finishes being shocked by her arrival, and I have moved on to my second fish. Crunch crunch crunch!

"Rina, you're not supposed to eat the bones," Dorothea says, sitting down next to me and completing our usual breakfast quartet (plus Lysithea). I keep chewing my tasty meal, happy to have managed to snag one of the fish Byleth caught.

"Rina?"

Oh! Right, that's me! Rina is my nickname! I'm not used to having one of those. 

"But I like eating bones," I point out reasonably. 

"They're basically little needles," Dorothea protests. "You're going to poke a hole in your own throat." 

"That's what chewing them is for…?" I inform her, not sure where she's going with this. "Bones are nutritious. Why throw them away?" 

"...Okay, you little hyena," Dorothea sighs. "Forget I said anything." 

"I'll try, but I can't do that on purpose," I warn her. My cover isn't supposed to know memory-altering magic. Hubert starts staring at me, so I wave at him. 

"What have you been up to lately, Karina?" he asks me. "Outside of meals and the classroom, I've found my days refreshingly devoid of your presence." 

"I've been watching Professor Byleth," I answer. "I told you I would nearly a month ago."

The table goes silent as everyone stares at me.

"What?" I ask, suddenly a little nervous.

"...You've been stalking your professor?" Lysithea asks.

"Yeah, I just said that," I frown. "She's really weird."

"Well, I could have told you that much," Dorothea grins. "Surely you have some more scandalous secrets for us? Like… what's her favorite kind of tea?" 

"I… have no way of determining that," I admit, a bit uncomfortable with not having an answer. "She maintains a stockpile of exactly one kind of every available flavor of tea sold at the market at all times, which she replaces based on use. I have never seen her drink tea alone, only on her weekly student invites." 

Again, silence is my only answer. Oh no. 

"... Apologies, I will go obtain more information immediately," I swallow, getting up from my seat.

"No!" Edelgard blurts. "Karina, wait. We're just… surprised. Please, tell us more."

"Is she into women?"

"Dorothea!" Edelgard admonishes her. 

"What?" she grins. "I like to know my options. …And my competitors." 

"I… do not know," I admit miserably. "She certainly hasn't propositioned anyone. Sylvain has attempted to flirt with her on several occasions, but she has never reciprocated."

"Well, that doesn't mean much of anything," Dorothea sighs. "Beyond proving she has a brain."

I stiffen up. Ohhh, this is all going so wrong! What did I miss? 

"...How?" I ask. 

"Hmm?"

"How does that prove she has a brain?" I ask helplessly. "I've yet to entirely rule out the possibility that she is a magical construct!"

"What!?" Lysithea gapes. "You think your professor is a magical construct?"  

"No!" I protest. "That is very unlikely. But I have yet to entirely rule it out. It would explain certain behaviors and physical attributes I have no other explanation for, but it generally raises more questions than answers." 

Such as 'how could someone make a magical construct so advanced at replicating human life that it fools even my creator, the uncontested expert in the field,' for example, but I know better than to voice that concern. It's just that the only other possibility I can think of for why she doesn't have a heartbeat is that she's a Nabatean, and I don't even want to think about the possibility that those things have been secretly breeding. They're all related! I need to ask my creator about it the next time he summons me. 

Besides, for all I can't figure her out, I like Professor Byleth. There's no way she's one of them. It just wouldn't make sense. 

"She acquires new skills at an inhuman rate," I explain. "When she goes to Professor Hanneman for magic lessons, it's as though she had already been practicing whatever new skill he introduces to her, but she never actually does any practice away from his tutelage. It's the same when she teaches, too. I've never even seen her use an axe, but she's corrected me about mistakes before I even do them."

Karina, don't use your crest during that kind of swing, it will overbalance you. Karina, hold the hilt differently before you attempt to crush armor. Karina, make sure to step in when you parry Ferdinand's thrusts. It's uncanny.

"I'm not sure there's anything terribly suspicious about being good at her job," Edelgard protests. "If anything, it would be more suspicious if she wasn't a savant given how abruptly Lady Rhea hired her." 

Did Lady Rhea hire her like that because she's… no. There's no sign of that! Byleth doesn't even seem to know who Rhea is, let alone treat her like one of her last living relatives. And Seteth seems to have no idea why she's here!

"It's not suspicious," I agree. "Byleth spends all her time either doing her job, preparing her job, or fishing. And she even finds ways to tie that to her job. It's… nice. I've found no evidence of ill intent or ulterior motives barring the secret communications she performs with an unknown party for unknown reasons via an unknown method." 

Again, the table goes silent. This time, I understand. I am ashamed of my poor investigative performance in this matter, even if I am mostly confident Byleth bears no ill intent to my friends. 

"Karina," Hubert says slowly. "Could you please explain this communication in more detail?" 

"Affirmative. When she is alone, the target appears to talk to herself, as though someone was listening and responding. However, I have never managed to perceive this other party. I have found no evidence of any magical or nonmagical method of sending and receiving audio over a distance. Not on her person, not among her possessions, not within her room or her walls, and not anywhere else. The most natural assumption in these circumstances is insanity, but she displays no other signs of an inability to correctly perceive reality, which makes this conclusion suspect. Therefore, I am forced to leave the reason as inconclusive." 

I'm bad at reading expressions even when I'm not deathly embarrassed about my horrible performance, so I certainly can't tell how anybody reacts to that. Probably scorn. What other opinion could they have about such a pathetic statement as 'I am forced to leave the reason as inconclusive.' I failed. I tried my best, but I failed.

"…What methods did you use to attempt to discern the communication method?" Hubert asks.

"Well I searched her room, of course," I say, starting with the obvious. "I checked the clothes she was wearing after she took them off to sleep. Her walls didn't have any recording or transference runes that I didn't put there, and there was nothing suspicious in the direction she tends to face when speaking, even in the next few rooms over."

"Oh dear," Edelgard mutters. "Who lives next to the professor, again?"

"Dedue, Ashe, and then Ignatz," Dorothea answers. "This is totally our fault, isn't it? Should we tell them?"

"Wait, how is this all of your faults?" Lysithea asks. "What has your house been doing!?"

"It's your house now too, remember?" Dorothea grins, motioning at Lysithea's recently acquired paperwork. "And it's our fault for not realizing Karina's understanding of humor is about on par with her understanding of boundaries."

"No no, I think this is all very fascinating information," Hubert insists. "I especially wasn't aware you knew how to place recording runes, Karina."

Oh shoot. Um. 

"I… don't," I lie. 

"But you just said her walls didn't have any recording or transference runes that 'you didn't put there,'" Hubert says.

"Well. Yes. And there aren't any I did put there either. Because that isn't a thing I know how to do." 

Perfectly consistent logic. And they can't ever find out I was lying, because I scrubbed the runes a week ago. The professor was getting way too good at magic for me to be comfortable leaving them so close to her.

"Karina," Dorothea says solemnly, leaning in close to me. "You are so good at espionage."

"Really!?" I brighten up. "Oh, I thought I did such a bad job! There were so many things I couldn't confirm. But at the very least, she's not receiving any outside payments, she doesn't appear to have any prior associations with any organizations other than her father's mercenary group, and while her father was previously a Knight of Seiros, all evidence points to him leaving the position on bad terms and only remaining in the area out of concern for his daughter. I overheard him warning the captains of his mercenary band to be careful around the archbishop and keep an eye on the Knights. I am not sure his daughter shares his animosity, but she certainly has no prior relations with the church."

I couldn't hear much more than that, unfortunately, because even though the man was five beers deep he still almost detected my presence. That caught me quite off guard, but I suppose it has been many years since I have actually had to use these skills so frequently.

"You're talking about that like it's a good thing," Lysithea squints at me. "Isn't it super suspicious for a mercenary captain to tell his men to keep an eye on the Knights?"

Now Edelgard and Hubert are giving me funny looks. Uh oh!

"I'm just reporting the facts," I insist.

"So you're saying you investigated her entire room, at least once while she was sleeping in it, and you also investigated all of her financial records, and you spied on her father… Karina, I have to say I'm impressed, but also very concerned," Edelgard says.

"Don't worry!" I assure my friend. "I wasn't in any danger!"

"What were the unidentified communications about?" Hubert asks, remaining on task as always. "Even if you only heard one side of the conversation, you must have some idea?"

"It mostly just sounded like she was talking to a friend," I admit. "The communications occurred approximately once or twice every week, most commonly on Sunday, and were generally a mix between brainstorming lesson plans, discussing our live combat assignment at the end of the month, friendly chats that involved some laughter, and relatively calm arguments, like this morning. Those sound almost as if the person our professor is speaking to is trying to get her to stop indulging in a vice, but I have never seen her do anything but work."

"Maybe working too much is her vice," Dorothea points out.

I blink at her.

"That… doesn't make any sense?" I say.

"There's nothing wrong with hard work," Edelgard agrees.

"Personally, I think you could use a little more rest, my lady," Hubert argues. "Please, allow me to take on some of your duties."

"My house—or I suppose my old house—could do with a lot more work, if you ask me," Lysithea pouts. "I work twice as hard as he does and Claude still has the gall to patronize me like I'm some child."

"Wow, forget I said anything," Dorothea retracts. "Clearly, you are all experts at managing your mental health."

"It's really just about discipline," I nod in agreement. "A focused mind requires no distractions."

"Were y'all abused as kids?" Dorothea asks, furrowing her eyebrows.

There's a long pause.

"I wasn't," I insist. Then I think about it a little harder. "…Well, I guess my dad hit me a lot, but it was mostly for training. And now I'm really strong!"

I mean, I was already really strong due to being one of my creator's greatest works masquerading as my father's daughter, but it helped me get even stronger! So I don't think it counts.

"Okay. Wow. I'm not qualified to deal with this. You all should probably talk to one of the bishops or something. Don't think I didn't notice that the rest of you wouldn't even answer."

"Your concern is very touching, Dorothea, but I assure you that I am fine," Edelgard insists.

"Don't treat me like I'm weak," Lysithea scowls. I nod in agreement. Of course Edelgard and Lysithea are okay! They survived all those Crest experiments, and now they're super strong! Besides, Edelgard would never talk to a bishop because she's trying to kill all of them and doesn't want them to know that. But of course, because she doesn't want them to know that, I'm also not supposed to know that, so I have to act like I don't know that. Which I'm great at!

"Sure, okay," Dorothea thankfully agrees, standing up. "Well, I don't wanna argue about this, so I'm just gonna go. Sorry for bringing it up and stuff, I guess that was too personal of me."

She picks up her dishes and walks away.

"Well, that was awkward," Lysithea says.

"She's just concerned," Edelgard defends her. "Dorothea has a big heart."

"I never asked for her concern," Lysithea pouts. "I don't even know her."

"Well, you will be getting plenty of opportunities in the near future, as you will be joining us for most of the magic classes," Hubert says. "And since I think saying so got somewhat lost in the chaos, welcome to the Black Eagles."

"Thanks," Lysithea says, her tone even. "I suppose if nothing else, it won't be boring."

"Indeed. Our professor, apparently, is a partially omniscient schizophrenic who talks to walls. I have to admit, not the result I was expecting from this particular bit of espionage."

"One cannot doubt her skill, though," Edelgard says. "I think the truth might be a little more complicated than that."

"Well, whatever the truth is, she's someone to watch out for," Hubert warns, though for some reason when he says it he is staring at me. Oh! Am I being signaled?

"I can continue keeping an eye on her if you want!" I make sure to offer. "I'm not sure what else my investigation could uncover, but I'm ready to resume at any time!"

"There's really no need for that, Karina," Edelgard says hurriedly. "You should be focusing on classwork anyway, right? There's no need to be so… excessive just because someone asks you to."

"But you're my friends," I insist. "I'd die for you if I had to."

Edelgard stares at me with wide eyes, and even Hubert seems to be at a loss for words. I wonder why that is. Isn't this normal? I've heard stories about people dying for friends and comrades all the time, and it's always framed as an act of virtue.

"Karina," Edelgard says firmly. "I don't want you to do that."

Hubert purses his lips, but doesn't voice any disapproval. I place a frown on my face, though, because I'm not sure what to do with that information. …No, that's not true. I know what I have to do. My mission is asset protection and espionage on Edelgard von Hresvelg. That comes first. Before even what my friend wants.

"I'm sorry, Edelgard," I tell her. "I'm not able to obey that request."

She furrows her brows at me—I'm getting a lot of that today—and stares at me for a long moment before casting her gaze down at her half-finished food. In her fist, the metal of her fork warps under the force of her grip.

"…Karina, did your father…"

"Did my father what?" I ask, tilting my head.

"No, never mind," Edelgard says. "This meal has been abnormally filling. I think I shall take my leave."

She stands up and walks away, taking her plate towards the disposal despite half the food still being on it. Wordlessly, Hubert follows her. I consider doing the same, but I'm a little upset about having to say no to her, worried I might have made a mistake. Is she not going to want to be my friend anymore? I could have just lied, I suppose, but that didn't seem like what a good friend would do.

Lysithea quickly stuffs the rest of her food into her mouth and departs as well, leaving me alone. I take my time with the rest of my meal, and then I head towards the training grounds. Our first real mission of the month is coming up very soon, and I'll have to be ready. It's the first time a lot of my classmates will be facing real combat, with enemies that are actively trying to kill them. I doubt Edelgard is a stranger to such situations, but she'll still be in danger.

I'll show her how serious I am there. She may not want me to die for her, but I know that she'll need plenty of people to kill for her. I bet I can make it up to her that way.

Chapter Text

"So this is the Red Canyon," Edelgard hums. "A ruin of sorts by the look of it. Let's end this quickly. The thieves must have been driven back."

A ruin indeed. I've heard a lot about this place, though I've never actually been until now. The site of one of the Agarthans' greatest victories has a prominent position in our history, after all. Nowadays, of course, it doesn't look like much. Crumbling stone is all that remains of the Nabateans who once lived here. Now it is the home of nothing but bandits, and I'm looking forward to spilling their blood in honor of this place's name.

It's been such a long time since I've actually killed someone! It will be good practice. I've probably gotten very rusty constantly working with blunted weapons and mock battles.

"Professor… I hear there's a back road to the west. Why don't we split up and attack from both the west and the front?" Edelgard continues, always eager to dive into the more tactical element of combat. I look up to her a lot for that. She's not just strong, but she's super smart too! She'll be a good Emperor.

"Encircling them to prevent their retreat would be ideal," Professor Byleth agrees in her usual deadpan. "Lady Rhea has ordered us to rout them; this can probably be accomplished by killing their leader, but I believe these men are rapists as well as murderers so I would prefer to kill them to the last."

A lot of the students seem taken aback at that, as if this sort of thing wasn't common for roving marauders. Edelgard in particular looks quite pale, but I guess even if they should have expected it most people tend to get a little ill at the thought of crimes like this.

"Are you serious, Professor?" Caspar asks.

"Yes? I am not very good at jokes, but even I can tell this would be a poor one."

"I suppose it's good motivation not to lose," Dorothea mutters.

"You won't lose," Professor Byleth states like it's a fact. "Bandits are poorly coordinated, poorly trained, and these ones in particular are likely poorly fed after being chased all the way out into deadlands like these. With your skills, I doubt any of you will end up in genuine danger, but if you do I will step in."

"Will you not be fighting alongside us, Professor?" Petra asks.

"It wouldn't be as effective of a lesson if I did," she answers. "We are technically outnumbered here, but we will eliminate that disadvantage by using the environment. First, we take the bridge. Edelgard, Caspar, you will be up front closing the distance with those archers. The rest of us will back you up as necessary. Once we hold the bridge, we will split up. Edelgard, Petra, Ferdinand, and Hubert, you will take the west. I trust you have no problem leading the group that will deploy your tactic, Edelgard?"

"None at all, Professor!"

"Good. The rest of you will stay with me, and engage with targets at my discretion. We will be engaging in a mass ranged offensive and working our way slowly forward. Karina, your role is to deal with anyone that manages to close the distance. You are to remain near the others at all times. Linhardt, Bernadetta, Dorothea, Lysithea. You will kill the enemy as we advance."

I resist the urge to frown, not happy with this plan at all. It seems inefficient, if not downright foolish. Why hold me back? The professor knows that I have experience in exactly these sorts of fights. I killed bandits regularly back in Gillingr territory; the mountains are full of appealing caves to hide out in, so we tended to get a lot fleeing in from other parts of the country. Fortunately, I'm not the only person with objections, and someone else speaks up with them before me.

"Forgive me, Professor, but this formation feels wildly lopsided," Linhardt protests. "At the very least, shouldn't Dorothea or I join Edelgard's group in case they need healing? I'd be happy to volunteer to—"

"No," Byleth answers, cutting him off. "Both of you would let Edelgard and the others take care of the bandits for you. You haven't killed before, have you?"

"I… no, Professor," he confirms. "And I am in no hurry to change that state of affairs."

"Not wanting to is fine," Byleth says. "But you will. Today. For today's lesson, all of you will kill someone with your own hands. Some of you already have, and so you have already passed. But for the rest of you, that innocence ends today."

"P-Professor!" Dorothea gapes. "Is that really necessary? Is forcing us to experience real battle part of the church's teachings!?"

Byleth responds with a placid blink.

"You are at an officer's academy," she says. "How could I let you graduate without preparing you for war?"

Despite her entirely reasonable argument, shocked silence is her only answer. Our professor opts to elaborate. 

"I will be with you," she assures us. "You will be safe, and the death of these men will be just. It is fine if you hate it. Perhaps it is preferable. Your first kill will be hard. But that is why you will do it today, in a real battle, under sufficient enough guard that you will survive if the experience makes you falter. Now form up. The enemy has seen us, so we must hurry."

We do as ordered and start to advance. I still wish I could be at the vanguard with Edelgard and Hubert, but I understand my mission now. I forgot that humans could get easily shaken by the deaths of people they don't even know if they aren't acclimated to it first. I felt nothing after my first kill, nor any of my others really. The deaths of people around me never affected me much, though I've never actually lost anyone I'm close to. My mother has always been fairly healthy, and while my father has suffered a few close calls he has always been fine in the end. I doubt anyone could kill my creator (he certainly won't die of natural causes), and my friends here at the academy…

I suppose there's a chance they could die today. I would not like that. I would not like that at all. Now I want to be with Edelgard even more.

"Well, there they go," Dorothea sighs, and I break out of my internal musings in time to watch Edelgard knock an arrow out of the air with her axe before burying it in the neck of the man who fired it. Caspar takes an arrow to the shoulder but still manages to land a punch on his assailant, his gauntlets caving in the bandit's skull. Despite the injury, he throws both arms up into the air and whoops with victory over the corpse he just created.

"Well, he looks excited," Lysithea comments.

"Caspar's always been a little… off," Linhardt says, looking vaguely ill. "I'm not sure he's ever killed anyone before, but his father is the Minister of Military Affairs, and one of the most skilled combatants in the Empire. I imagine he is somewhat acclimated to this."

"I think that is his first kill," I hum, watching the boy jump around. "It's a bit of an overreaction otherwise."

"You've killed before, Karina?" Linhardt asks, seeming surprised.

"We're both nobles, right?" I answer, tilting my head. "I'm surprised you haven't."

I get a variety of stares from everyone at that, but there's no way I can interpret any of them. They just blend together into a single awkward silence until I ultimately feel the need to turn away.

"...Well, it explains why you've been assigned to protect us," Lysithea frowns. "I'm a little irritated that the assumption is that I need to be protected, but I suppose I'll prove otherwise through my actions."

"I suppose we'll all have to do that," Dorothea agrees grimly.

We cross the bridge and the battle begins, though there's unfortunately not much for me to do. The bandits try to kill us, and we kill them first. Professor Byleth stays with us and calls out targets, and I remain close enough to protect the others without getting in their line of fire. Having nothing better to do, I keep a careful eye on the reactions of my classmates to the death, trying to commit it to memory so I don't forget again. Lysithea barely seems to care about her kills beyond a spike of adrenaline, an involuntary tension in her body that she seems to do her best to ignore. Perhaps she is just good at hiding her responses, which I can respect.

Dorothea stays uncharacteristically silent. I think that might mean she is sad. Linhardt vomits after his first kill, violent and uncontrolled, but I successfully dodge. I also get to finally do something as he hesitates on his next attempt, giving me cause to step forward and open a man who tried to get too close. Bernadetta, though… 

"I don't care if they're stealing! Can I go home!?" the archer whines. I used to be really worried that Bernadetta didn't like me because of all that stuff with her father, but it turns out that she just seems to act that way around everybody, so that's reassuring. She's scared of everything basically all the time and I don't know why she's in a school to learn how to fight. I suppose she's not a bad shot when she actually uses her bow, but this is not one of those times.

"You may not," Byleth asserts. "Your target is there, in front of you. If you do not take them down one of your allies will. But that is another fight they will have to risk, and another chance they will die. Are you prepared for that, Bernadetta?"

"I-I don't like this lesson!" Bernadetta squeaks, tears dripping out of her eyes.

"This is the job we were given. We will complete it. You don't have to like it; you merely have to do it."

I nod. That's a good philosophy to live by.

Sobbing incoherently, Bernadetta draws her bow and fires an arrow into a bandit's neck, dropping him in seconds. She certainly has the aptitude, if not the attitude.

My gaze wanders west, settling on where Edelgard and the others are completing their half of the pincer. While our team has been slowed down by various personal issues, Edelgard's team has to go a little more out of their way to reach their target location, so our timing has actually turned out to be quite fortuitous. The bandit leader and his various bodyguards are all that is left, and though they will likely be more formidable there is no way they will be able to withstand being crushed between us. Edelgard's team makes it into position. Now they only need to wait for us, and…

Hold on. Why isn't Caspar waiting? The fool is charging in to continue the fight! I suppose it's entirely possible he could defeat the remaining enemies without our support, but that isn't the plan! He's disobeying orders! Worse, he's not even being smart about it. If he just rushes right towards them, he's going to be the one who ends up surrounded! Caspar is not my friend, but Edelgard would probably be sad if he died, so this is really bad!

Doubly bad is that instead of leaving him to his fate, Edelgard immediately orders the rest of her team to back him up. They rush after him, which is the correct move if one is attempting to save his life, but now they're all about to be surrounded by the strongest remaining enemies!

"Professor!" I say to get her attention.

"I see it," Professor Byleth answers in the same monotone as always. "Let's pick up the pace, everyone."

"I'm faster than everyone else," I say, my heart starting to pound as the battle in front of us commences. Two trained swordsmen are backing up the leader of the bandits (perhaps they're former knights?) and their style looks heavily favorable against Edelgard's axe technique. This could actually be bad.

"No, stay with us," Byleth orders, and I twitch. "Their odds aren't too bad. Let's see how this plays out."

But… but I want to go help them. Should I rush ahead anyway…? That would be disobeying an order. I can't disobey orders. Byleth is not my creator, and she is not my friend, but she is my superior and I cannot disobey orders. I can't. I can't! I just have to watch, and—

Ferdinand tries to take down one of the swordsmen with his lance, forcing him back. Caspar rushes ahead to seize the opening, but he takes his eyes off the other enemy. A swing is aimed at his back. A desperate parry from Edelgard interrupts the strike, but knocks her axe from her grip. She stands undefended, and the swordsman moves to swing again.

She… she's going to die. I can see it. I can see where the blow will land. She's going to die!

I'm calculating the coordinates for the warp before I even think about it. Dark magic pours into the ground around me, preparing to light it with a sigil. My true from is a split second from erupting to the surface.

In a single motion, Byleth rips the bow from Bernadetta's hands, pulls a single arrow from her quiver, and looses it into the back of the swordsman's head. He dies instantly.

My shock helps me clamp down on my panic, forcing the magic to dissipate, my mask to remain, and my daggers not to manifest. I can't hold back the heavy breaths of terror from what I just almost witnessed. Was I really just about to… no. No, no, no. I wouldn't. Of course I wouldn't. Would I? I mean, it would be disobeying orders, but my mission would already be a failure if Edelgard died, right? It would already be over. I would lose everything anyway, I would be a failure anyway, so maybe almost doing that doesn't mean I've gone insane.

I flinch again, suddenly recognizing my surroundings once more. Professor Byleth is staring at me, and though her face is still mostly blank her eyes have noticeably widened in an expression I can't quite identify. Shock, right? But it shouldn't be shock. I haven't actually done anything I'm not supposed to. I stopped myself. Right? I do a mental checklist of myself and my status, and yes. I was on the brink of revealing myself, but I didn't. None of the students are looking at me strangely. Did she sense the dark magic…? No, there's no way she could have. Professor Byleth can't even cast dark magic. Yet she continues to stare at me. I blink slowly at her to indicate my lack of aggression, but she doesn't respond.

"Holy shit," Dorothea swears. Her crude lack of tact causes me to turn to her in shock instead. My mother told me to never say bad words like that! I suppose we are on a battlefield, though. A lot of people seem to say bad words on battlefields, so it might be okay? I guess it's because they are bad places, according to human culture.

"Th-that was an incredible shot, Professor!" Bernadetta stammers, looking genuinely awed. And yes, I have to admit it was, especially from how far away we still are. Byleth doesn't verbally respond, but she does finally take her eyes off of me and hand Bernadetta back her bow.

"Let's rush ahead," Byleth orders. "Karina…"

I tense up, ready for anything.

"…you may engage at your discretion."

Oh. Oh!

"Yes Professor!" I confirm, rushing ahead as fast as my mask can physically take me. Which is… still very fast. I'm not going to let Edelgard be in danger again today.

Her group has already taken care of the last of the guard, leaving only the bandit leader. Rather than engaging them, Edelgard has opted to withdraw in order to berate Caspar, which I agree with on both tactical and personal levels. When she sees me rushing towards the enemy leader, though, she quickly moves to follow me.

"Karina!" she calls out. "Wait!"

"Sorry, Edie," I tell her. "Not a second time."

I rush towards the bandit leader, and while he seems to have the talking-to-himself madness like Professor Byleth, that clearly doesn't mean I should underestimate him.

"That damn Flame Emperor!" the leader swears. "That fucker set me up to take the fall!"

"You shouldn't say bad words," I tell him, and bury my weapon into his arm.

He roars in pain, but to my surprise he doesn't fall, swinging his blade at me with one arm. I parry, but the force still pushes me back, his axe heavy and my body light. Sidestepping another wild blow, I swing at him again, but he blocks it, still ranting and raving.

"I was set up!" he insists. "I was hired to kill those noble brats! Killing me won't solve anything! But I can tell you all I know about the leader! I'm more useful to you alive than dead!"

It is at this point that Edelgard catches up with me, so I want to make this quick. The man is freakishly strong, but with only one working arm there's no way he has a very good grip. Ducking under one more blow, I jam the hilt of my weapon into his thumb, breaking it and causing the axe to clatter out of his hand. He stumbles back, landing on his butt.

"Y-you!" the bandit breathes, pointing at Edelgard. His shattered thumb dangles limp. "You were one of them! I was hired to kill you! I can tell you who did it! Just spare me!"

I frown. That… is actually not a bad reason to spare him. I don't want anyone hiring hits on Edelgard to go unknown. But that's not really our mission, and I'm already pretty anxious about all of the disobedience I've almost done today. Fortunately, I have an excellent way to resolve this problem.

"What should we do, Edie?" I ask her. It should be okay if she wants me to.

She doesn't look at me, staring only at the man. Another complicated, hard-to-read expression that I don't understand rests on her face. But her words, at least, are clear.

"Our orders are to kill him," she answers evenly. "I see no reason to gainsay them."

"Okie dokie!" I smile at her, cutting off the bandit's last protests along with his head.

Edelgard blankly watches his head roll to the ground. I wipe the blood off my axe's blade, sheathe it, and fail to resist the urge to hug her.

"Wh-wha?" she squeaks.

"I'm so glad you're okay!" I wail, fervently rubbing my cheek over the top of her head. "I thought you were going to die, Edie!"

Water starts falling down my face, and I regret mentally berating Bernadetta for crying on the battlefield. At least I'm doing it after the battle is over, but I usually don't do it at all!

"I…" Edelgard answers, seeming a little shocked by the contact. I suppose she has been a bit more distant lately, ever since I told her I wouldn't hesitate to die for her. But hey, wait a second!

"I can't believe you got mad at me for saying I would die for you and then you go and do something like that for Caspar of all people!" I accuse. "That's not fair!"

"For once, Lady Edelgard, I must agree with Karina," Hubert says, scowling as he approaches. "That was excessively foolhardy."

"What, you just want me to leave him to die?"

"Yes!" Hubert and I say at the same time.

"I'm right here, you know," Caspar says, as if I didn't know that.

"I can't do that," Edelgard insists. "The Professor sent us off together because she was trusting us to keep each other safe. What Caspar did was foolhardy, yes, but I don't think our response was in light of the fact that I thought we could win. In that light, the only choice was to try. It was my analysis of the situation that was at fault, and my inadequacy at properly explaining the situation to the team."

"…Uh, hey, wait," Caspar chimes in. "I'm not so thick that I can't admit that that was definitely, entirely my fault. I'm the one that messed up. You don't have to try and take any of the credit for it."

Edelgard shakes her head.

"Failure is always the responsibility of the leader," Edelgard insists. "And since I was assigned by the professor to lead, I am at fault."

"Well by that logic, I'm at fault," Byleth says, the rest of the class finally joining us. "However, I don't think there's any reason to be passing around blame. It's true that mistakes were made in this operation, but ultimately, we cleared all objectives with no casualties. That's a good battle. Let's head back to the monastery and do after-action when we're fed and rested."

Reluctantly, I release Edelgard and start following the professor, though I make sure to never let the future Emperor stray too far away from me. It's a long journey back to the monastery, the sun having already set by the time we return, most of the class exhausted and ready to collapse into bed. I don't go to my room, though. I follow Edelgard back to hers. She's been silent the whole walk, but she finally sighs and turns to face me as we stand in her doorway.

"Go to bed, Karina," she tells me. "I'll be fine."

"I will be too," I assure her. "I can stay awake for a very long time."

"But there is no need for you to do so," Edelgard says. "Please."

I hesitate, not wanting to leave. Not wanting our friendship to return to the awkward distance from before.

"I…" I start hesitantly. "If… if you don't want me to protect you, Lady Edelgard, then please at least use me. Let me be your weapon."

She stares at me, her eyes hard and her lips pursed.

"I thought you wanted to be my friend," she says evenly.

"I do!" I answer immediately. "I do. You are my friend. Aren't you?"

"A weapon is not a friend, Karina," she tells me. "It is a tool."

"I…" I hesitate, fear building inside me. "Can I not be both?"

Edelgard frowns, but I can't tell what that means in regards to the rest of her expression other than the fact that it's bad.

"Why do you want to be my weapon, Karina?" she asks.

I relax a little. That question is easy, at least.

"It's what I am," I tell her simply.

"And who forged you into a weapon, Karina?" she presses. "Weapons do not appear on their own. They require a blacksmith."

And of course, the fear returns.

"I… m-my father," I manage. It's almost not a lie. My creator is not my father, but he's kind of like one, if you think about it.

"I don't think that's true," Edelgard says simply. "We looked into your father, Karina. He's certainly not a man with a fully clean record, but he's loyal. Loyal enough that there's absolutely no chance he set up a school for child assassins behind my back . So again, I ask you: who made you a weapon?"

I feel my body shaking. I try to stop it, but I fail. Inexcusable.

"I… I can't tell you," I admit. "But I'm not your enemy! I'm not going to hurt you! I'll never hurt you!"

"Maybe that's true," Edelgard says. "But you still aren't being honest with me. And the thing about weapons is that people generally have them made because they intend to use them. I can't trust a weapon if I don't know its wielder, and I can't befriend someone I can't trust."

"But…!" I blurt. "But I have to! I have to be your friend! You have to trust me!"

"I wonder why that might be," Edelgard answers flatly, entering her room and shutting the door.

I still stand outside her door all night. In the morning, I once again can't read her expression, but she departs without a word.

Chapter Text

"And that," Byleth says flatly, "is the end of our lesson for today. However, before you depart, I would like to announce our end-of-month field study. The Church has recently received news that Lord Lonato and his people have entered open rebellion against the Church of Seiros. Our class has been assigned as the rearguard to the detachment of the Knights sent to quell this rebellion."

Everyone reacts with varying degrees of surprise and shock, but Edelgard is the one to form a coherent question first.

"Our class?" she asks. "Why our class? Lonato is a lord of Faerghus, is he not? Aren't the political implications of sending several citizens of the Empire to quell a rebellion in Faerghus somewhat… questionable?"

I have to agree. It seems like such an odd pick that I have to worry if this is targeted. Is Rhea onto me? Is she onto Edelgard?

The Adrestian Empire and the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus have a tense but nominally peaceful relationship. On the surface, it's not entirely unjustified for the Church to send whoever they want to quell a rebellion against them. But one of the other houses of the monastery—the Blue Lions—is made up almost exclusively of residents of Faerghus, including the Crown Prince Dimitri. Why not send him to deal with the rebellion of one of his own nobles? It's the obvious choice, and mom always told me that when someone doesn't pick the obvious choice, they're up to something. Maybe something good, but maybe something bad.

I've never been the best at working out other people's motivations, but I am the heir of a barony and a trained undercover agent. I know my initial fear that Rhea knows doesn't make any sense. If she was actually aware of who I am and what I was planning to do here, I would no longer be alive. She would have no need to try and surreptitiously dissuade rebellion through a play like this. Because that's what this has to be, isn't it? Outside of Lord Lonato, the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus has infamously good relations with the Church. It's right there in the name. Rhea has no need to send students from Faerghus on a trip to demonstrate the overwhelming might of the Knights of Seiros. Because, frankly, a minor lord rebelling against the Church alone is doing little more than committing an elaborate suicide. There is no need for us to be there. 

We will not be expected to fight. We will be expected to watch Lord Lonato kill himself. And out of all the nations, that is a lesson Rhea would most like to teach the Empire.

I glance over at Edelgard, wondering for a moment if she figured all of that out. Then I realize I'm being stupid, because of course she has. I should really be wondering why she bothered to ask. She doesn't need the real answer to this question, so… maybe she just wants to hear the answer Byleth was given?

"Rhea said 'This mission should prove useful in demonstrating to the students how foolish it would be to ever turn their blades on the Church.'" Byleth responds.

Edelgard and I, along with the rest of the class, gape openly at her. Seriously? Rhea just came out and said it? Darn it! I did all that thinking for nothing! I was really proud of that!

"Rather… heavy-handed, wouldn't you say?" Hubert drawls.

"Well personally, I am happy to be a part of an operation such as this," Ferdinand huffs. "The foremost duty of a noble is to protect their citizenry; to incite his people into a doomed rebellion, all for a personal vendetta, is one of the greatest failures of that duty imaginable!"

"A personal vendetta?" Dorothea asks.

"Well, I assume so," Ferdinand answers. "Firstly because I cannot imagine anything else driving this folly, but secondly because the motive is clear: Lord Lonato's son is one of the nobles who was executed by the Church for participation in the Tragedy of Duscur. The man intends to take revenge over an act of justice! Despicable."

Was Lord Lonato's son one of the nobles my people tricked into the whole Duscur thing? I don't really remember. I was very young when that happened. I suppose it doesn't much matter. I was never involved in that mission, so any non-public knowledge of it is irrelevant to my station.

"Speculation aside, make sure you are ready to depart by the end of the week," Byleth says, regaining control of the discussion. "Do keep in mind that the Kingdom of Faerghus is cold. Exceedingly cold. Dangerously cold. I know that not all of you have experience living in cold climates, so I would recommend you check with your fellow classmates or even people from other houses to get advice on what clothing would be appropriate for the journey. I don't want anyone to freeze to death, so this will be part of your grade."

"Yes, instructor!" Petra says, looking particularly worried.

"That will be all, then. Dismissed."

I nervously get up and head towards the back of the room, moving on a casual intercept course with Edelgard. I know she's still mad at me, but I really want to ask if she's doing okay! As part of her plot to overthrow the Church, I bet this must be really anxiety-inducing for her! I mean, not that she knows I'm a part of her plot to overthrow the Church, but I am! I should be a good co-conspirator!

"Hey, um, Edelgard?" I ask her hesitantly as she tries to step past me and leave the room. "Can I ask you something?"

"Is it relevant to our classes, or something I may assist you with as head of house?" Edelgard asks.

"Well, um, not exactly…" I hedge.

"Come on, Edie! Cut her some slack!" Dorothea says, walking up to us. "I know the two of you have had something going on since the last field study, but just look at poor Rina! She obviously regrets whatever it is she did."

I nod very largely. Thank you Dorothea! That is an extremely correct statement!

"There's a difference between regretting something and making up for it," Edelgard responds easily. "And since she has not done the latter, I do not truly believe she has done the former. Good day Karina, Dorothea."

She nods and turns to depart, Hubert lingering a ways behind her as he is wont to do.

"Seriously, Rina, what did you do?" Dorothea asks.

"I don't know!" I complain. "She just doesn't trust me anymore and I don't know why!"

"Perhaps it is because you are excessively suspicious more or less all of the time," Hubert chimes in as he passes.

"No!" I correct him indignantly. "I'm great at not being suspicious!"

"Oh, well, in that case do accept my apologies," Hubert answers without stopping.

"I forgive you!" I call after him.

"Okaaay," Dorothea says slowly, "I think I'm starting to feel out the edges of this problem."

"Maybe there are some nearby aggressive wyverns I could kill?" I wonder desperately. "A lot of people back in the barony liked me because I saved them from wyverns."

"I… don't think that would help very much, Karina. I don't believe Edelgard thinks poorly of your combat skills, and I also don't believe she would need much help against wyverns in the first place."

Oh no, she's right.

"But then what do I do?" I ask helplessly. "You're good with people, right Dorothea? You can remember their faces and stuff?"

Dorothea blinks.

"Karina, can you not remember people's faces?" she asks.

"No! I can remember! Ferdinand has orange hair. You have big long wavy brown hair. Edelgard and Lysithea both have long straight white hair, but Edelgard wears red. Plus they talk different!"

"I… see," Dorothea says, her eyebrows furrowing together. "And how would you recognize Edelgard if she and Lysithea were in the same room and she wasn't wearing red?"

"I would check which one is closer to Hubert!"

Dorothea starts to respond, then re-thinks whatever she was about to say.

"…Well, I suppose I can't say that wouldn't work," Dorothea admits.

"Exactly," I nod proudly. I have put a lot of effort into getting a working system and it works great.

"But it also seems like the answer to my question is 'yes, Dorothea, I cannot remember faces.'"

"But you're Dorothea," I remind her.

She sighs.

"…Yes, Rina dear, I am. I suppose I'll just file this away as a helpful tidbit to know. We're getting a little off-topic. It sounds to me like you've done something to lose Edelgard's trust. She wants you to do something in particular to make up for it. Do you know what that is?"

I shake my head. I have a suspicion, but I hope it's not true.

"Well, do you know what you did to lose her trust?"

"…I'm keeping secrets from her," I admit.

"So she probably wants you to tell her those secrets," Dorothea deduces.

"She does," I confirm despondently. "But I can't tell her any of them, Dorothea! That's what makes them secrets!"

"Well, that's a good point, Karina," Dorothea nods. "And I think not agreeing to tell someone secrets simply because they ask you is a positive quality of your character. It speaks well of you that you will not share privileged information simply because someone you want to like you asks to know."

"Then why is she so mad about it!?" I lament. "It's not like she isn't keeping secrets from me."

I mean, I know them all already, but she doesn't know that I know so she's still trying to keep them!

"It does seem a little hypocritical," Dorothea commiserates. "Edie puts on a brave face, but I can tell she's hurting underneath it. Kind of like you, sometimes. But it sounds like you're not willing to give her what she wants and she's not willing to accept you until you do. That's a hard situation, but it's probably still possible to gain trust the old-fashioned way. Just keep doing your best, Karina. I know you mean well, and I think deep down, she does too. As long as you continue to do right by her, I think she'll come around. Trust is built through time, not shared secrets. Plus, she seems to have a thing for… deeply weird people."

Dorothea glances at Professor Byleth as she says that for some reason. Byleth seems to notice, and approaches us after gathering her things from the podium. 

"Everything alright?" Professor Byleth asks.

"We're fine, Professor," Dorothea answers. "Thank you for asking."

"Hmm. Karina," the professor addresses me, turning my way, "would you like to join me for tea?"

Oh! It is my turn to have a fabled Professor Byleth Teatime. Everyone who has had one so far has reported having a delightful time with her, and indeed, they always seemed to be having fun when I was spying on them.

"Yes, Professor!" I confirm. Mom always said that tea is good for calming the nerves after stressful events. Plus, Byleth is good at everything I have ever seen her attempt, which means she will probably have great advice for interpersonal problems such as not being able to tell the people important to you that you're a lab-engineered Agarthan spy sent to retake the surface world from evil fire-breathing lizards who also happen to be head of the Church. Er. Well, I guess I can't ask her about precisely that, but I can probably get the general idea across.

"Ooh, lucky you, Karina," Dorothea smiles. "I'll take my leave, then. And I look forward to my next invitation, Professor!" 

Byleth gives her an acknowledging nod, stepping past us and out of the room. I follow her out to the terrace, sitting down to wait as she prepares the tea and snacks with quick, efficient motions, like she's done it a thousand times before. She pours me my cup, adds two cubes of sugar, and finishes with a dash of cream. I accept the cup, and take a sip.

My blood runs cold as I force myself to keep my composure.

It is not my favorite tea. It isn't even close to my favorite tea. In fact, it's kind of unpleasant. I don't like cream all that much, and I prefer sharper flavors to sweet ones, which I find somewhat overwhelming. What this is, however, is the tea I determined in advance that I would tell Byleth is my favorite if she ever asked, prepared in exactly the way I would claim to prefer it. Yet by my memory, she has never once asked, and I've never spoken a word of it to anyone.

It rules out several possibilities. Most notably, it rules out the possibility that either Byleth herself or a network of spies working for her have been gathering information about tea habits from people close to her students. That would be by far the most reasonable way for Byleth to have this unlikely information. Her method of knowing these things has been weighing on me ever since I started spying on her, so I set up several tests like this. My mother, and all the servants in my home, would be well-versed in my real tea preferences. This particular kind of tea, and its exact preparation method, exists only in my mind. I was planning to tell her I liked this blend if she asked about it, but she never did.

Which means, somehow, we have arrived at the most unlikely, worst-case scenario. Byleth has the ability to gain access to information that exists only in my mind. This makes her a mission-critical threat. I need to determine the nature of her ability and/or eliminate her. Today.

That really sucks. I like Professor Byleth.

I watch carefully as Byleth takes a sip from her own teacup, seemingly casual in her posture but never truly letting her hands stray far from the sword leaning against her chair. Did she even bring a sword to tea with her other students? I suppose that, unlike usual, we started our teatime immediately after class, so she would naturally be carrying her sword with her as it is often relevant to her instruction. A calculated play, perhaps? Did she expect this confrontation? How? Can she read minds? If she can read minds, why would she intentionally set out a tea configuration I created specifically to forewarn me of this exact possibility? Does she want me to try to kill her? Is she simply limited in the information she can obtain? If so, how?

I barely stop myself from flinching as Byleth sets her teacup down with a loud clink . She shifts her weight a little, surreptitiously moving one hand towards the hilt of her sword, and I tense to strike. She frowns.

"So it's the tea, then," she says, relaxing again as she carefully moves her hand away from her weapon. "The tea sets you off. Why?" 

I… what? I stare at her uncomprehendingly. Shouldn't she know? Is she not… no, there's two possibilities here. She's either truly limited in her ability to pull information from my mind, or she's not and she's simply trying to convince me she doesn't know enough to be worth executing. But if the latter is true… why? I'm not truly confident I could defeat her in a fair fight, and here in the public terrace, in the middle of the day, when she's already clearly on-guard? We might be alone right now but someone would definitely hear the commotion and witness my attempt, successful or otherwise. And that would jeopardize not just my mission, but my master's as well. I can't fight her here, not unless it turns out I need to eliminate her immediately before she can get in contact with anyone else. Unless that becomes apparent, I instead need to convince her that I don't intend to attack at all.

And then I need to kill her, fast and silent enough to get away with it.

"Hmm," Byleth considers. "Karina."

"Y-yes?" I stammer. Why Professor Byleth? Why did it have to be her? Edelgard likes her too…

"I don't know how to be a good professor," my unreasonably excellent professor admits.

That stuns me enough to cause my first thought to fall out of my mouth.

"No," I say. "That's wrong."

"I am glad you think so," Byleth says. "But it is very new to me. I have read a lot of books about it, and talked with the other professors, and determined the core strategies and philosophies that I believe work best."

Well. Um.

"I believe those are the actions a good professor would take," I tell her.

"I do my best," Byleth says firmly. "And I have determined that the foremost duty of any professor is ensuring the current and future well-being of their students."

I nod slowly. That does indeed seem like the best priority for an educator.

"I think I have been very lucky, getting to teach your class," my professor admits. "You are eager to learn. But sometimes, oftentimes, there are problems I do not know how to solve. It is not so simple as giving the right gifts or finding lost undergarments. It requires time, patience, and careful conversation. I… am not good at these things."

That, too, seems absurd.

"Everyone seems to like you, Professor," I point out. "Even the other houses."

"That is good," Byleth says. "It is very difficult for me, but I am trying very hard. Do you know what isn't difficult for me, Karina?"

A test? Well, I'm sure I can figure out the answer. It's a difficult one, though. It almost seems like Professor Byleth is good at everything. If that's the case, maybe the correct answer is whatever she's best at? And to that, I can only think back to the Red Canyon, and the impossible shot she made after declaring her supreme confidence in our victory. She knew we wouldn't lose. She knew it for the same reason I knew it: either of us could have taken out the bandits alone if we had to.

"…Fighting," I answer.

"Very good, Karina," Byleth says in her usual deadpan. "I'm actually a little famous for it. Maybe not as much as Count Bergliez, but I'm good. Some people call me the Ashen Demon. I don't like the name. People seem to get the idea that they can get a name if they kill someone who has one. It never goes well for them."

Well, she seems awfully talkative. Maybe I can just ask her.

"Why are you so strong, Professor?"

"I don't know," Byleth admits. "Professor Hanneman says it's because I have something called the Crest of Flames."

What!? I jolt to my feet, my chair clattering to the ground behind me. A Crest of the dragon god!? The Professor really is a Nabatean! Unless… no, no, calm down. My creator gave the Crest of Flames to Edelgard as well, didn't he? She could just be another Nemesis Project. Is she one of my creator's pawns? She certainly doesn't feel Agarthan… and if she was at all involved in my creator's plans I doubt she would just blurt out the name of her Crest in a public area like this. It's very much the sort of thing that would immediately set off the living Nabateans in the area. Unless she really is one of them, which means I have to—

"Karina," Professor Byleth's voice sounds out from behind me, her hand landing firmly on my shoulder. I freeze, staring at the empty seat she used to be in. What… what just happened? I didn't see her move. I wasn't even blinking, I know better than to blink right before I'm planning to kill someone.

"Sit back down," Byleth orders. "You and I still need to talk."

"I… I don't…" I stammer, desperately trying to figure out what just happened. I was about to kill her, and then… no. I'm wrong, aren't I? I was never about to kill her, and by stopping my attempt Byleth just saved my life. I carefully pick up my chair and sit back down into it, my heartbeat pounding in my chest, making it all the more obvious how Byleth's isn't. She's as cold as stone. She lets go of my shoulder and returns to her own seat, staring me down all the while. I don't even have an instant where I can try to act.

"Tell me what's going on," Byleth orders bluntly.

"I… what?" I try, pretending like I don't know what she's talking about. Which is surprisingly easy, because there are so many things she could be talking about that I have absolutely no idea which she's referring to.

"I am used to nobles having schemes," Byleth says. "I do my best not to get involved with them. It is a hassle. In part because, whenever I end up accidentally uncovering a scheme, people usually try to send assassins after me. It's annoying."

I say nothing. I do nothing. I've already failed, haven't I? This is it. The only thing I can do now is figure out how to direct the fallout away from my creator.

"I don't have the faintest idea what noble thinks I've discovered their secrets, but whatever it is, I have no interest in it. Not unless it's going to hurt the Black Eagles. Your class is my only responsibility, and my only concern. That includes you, Karina, unless whatever scheme you're a part of is working against us. Is it?"

"No!" I insist firmly. "No, I would never! Edelgard is my friend! Even if she's mad at me! I won't ever betray her! I won't!"

Byleth stares me down, and I match her gaze, projecting as much sincerity as I can muster. The Black Eagles are Edelgard's house. They're my house. And she's going to use us to bring my creator's plans to fruition. Being here and supporting my friends is what I was made for. There's no reason I would ever do anything else. My mom would be proud of me, my creator is proud of me, and I know that someday, Edelgard will be proud of me too! I just have to prove it to her!

"Okay," Byleth says. "Then I'm on your side. Please stop trying to kill me."

"W-what? I never…" I start, trailing off as Byleth slowly raises an eyebrow at me. I didn't, though! Technically. Because she probably sensed my killing intent and stopped me beforehand. I can't believe she did that! I trained so hard to mask it properly.

"…Yes Professor," I agree, hanging my head.

"See that you don't," Byleth insists. "I'm warning you. If you try again, you will literally never have the chance to regret it."

"I understand, Professor," I tell her. And I do. After that… what even was that? Sigil-free teleportation? Impossible. But whatever it was, there's no way I can actually beat her, so it's somewhat of a moot point. And yet, she sensed my intent and was willing to make peace with me anyway! Maybe she's actually being honest when she says she doesn't intend to interfere. But still…

"Can I ask you a question, Professor?" I try hesitantly.

"I am the professor of the Black Eagles," Byleth answers. "My contract is to guide your growth into upstanding and skilled adults. You may always ask me questions, and I will always give you the answer I think is best."

"What are you?" I blurt.

Byleth considers the question for only a moment.

"What are you?" she responds.

"I… I can't answer that, Professor," I tell her, my fists clenched underneath the table.

"Then let's leave it at that for now, and agree to keep whatever we know about the other a secret from here on out. No more spying. I will not tell your classmates anything about you that you don't wish for them to know, and you will return the same courtesy. Is that fair?"

"You can't tell Lady Rhea either," I whisper swiftly. "Or anyone else, for that matter. Not just my classmates. No one."

Byleth's eyebrows raise slightly, but she barely hesitates before giving me a nod.

"Agreed," she says. "Mercenary's honor. Your secrets are part of the contract. That goes for now, and anything in the future you might want to share. As long as you are a Black Eagle, I will help you in whatever way I can. No matter what enemy that turns out to be."

She thinks for a moment.

"…However, I would prefer at least a twenty-four-hour notice detailing the expected nature of allied and enemy forces before you request for me to participate in an engagement, if possible," she amends. "I may request hazard pay."

"U-Understood, Professor!" I acknowledge. Wow! Maybe I haven't ruined everything after all! Maybe I've actually recruited an incredibly powerful ally to our cause! Maybe that social manipulation training paid off somehow or another. I don't really remember most of it, but maybe I internalized it somehow.

"Good," Byleth nods. "Now is there anything you would like to talk about?"

I stare at the table for a bit, trying to think of something.

"…Would you like to know my actual favorite tea, Professor?" I ask.

"Hnngh," Byleth frowns. "Yes, but not today, please. It would be too tempting. This was good enough."

"Okay?" I answer, not really understanding what she means by that, but the order is simple and actionable and that's the most important part of any sentence.

I do not drink any more of the awful tea, but I enjoy the snacks Byleth has set out in relative silence from that point on. Neither of us say much for the rest of the hour, but by the end of it I do have to agree that Byleth hosts pretty great teatimes.