Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Jun Kashihara moved to Iwatodai during the break before the new school term started. He'd waffled over this new job, teaching Composition at Gekkoukan High, for a while. He'd been teaching at Kasugayama for a few years now, and he knew he'd miss his students and coworkers there. This new job meant leaving Sumaru City, living away from his parents and his old friends and acquaintances.

But Kasugayama was different from how it had been when he was a student. It offered a better education. It had less of a reputation as the school for delinquents. So Jun didn't feel like he was abandoning the school when it needed him. And it was exciting, moving somewhere brand new, meeting new people. The job at Gekkoukan paid way more than his old job, too. Gekkoukan was prestigious. Even if he left, it'd look good on his resume for any other teaching job he wanted. He was lucky they even had a job opening in the first place, honestly. The previous 2nd year composition teacher had decided to move on to a different school, which left an opening that Jun had been hired to fill.

So, he decided to take the job. His parents both cried a bit and sent him off with well wishes and promises to call often. His coworkers and even some of his students wrote him cards saying goodbye. He packed up his apartment, found a new one near enough to the school to be convenient, and moved out.

Over the time before classes started up again, Jun kept himself busy. He met his coworkers and the school principal and chairman. He read up on all of the students that would be in his homeroom, and scanned through the files of the rest of the students he'd be teaching. He noted down who might be a problem student who might need more support, and who seemed to excel, although he knew that those impressions could very well be wrong. He went over his lesson plans. He walked through the school, making sure he knew where everything was.

Beyond preparing for his job, he tried to prepare for his new life. He tried to get to know the city and its public transport, although all he felt like he really accomplished was finding a few basic shops and a nice flower store. He mostly unpacked his apartment, although a few boxes still sat unopened.

There wasn't a lot of time, though, between the end of one year of classes and the start of the next. After only a couple weeks, Jun pinned a cheerful yellow poppy to the chest of his shirt and headed into his first day at Gekkoukan.

He got in before most of the students and set up in the faculty office. He knew from his preparations that he had a new transfer student in his homeroom, so the kid should come to see him before classes started. And he didn't like the idea of having to navigate through the crowds of students currently filling the school, so this was fine.

He went between listening to the chatter of some of his coworkers and going through his files and plans for the day. Every time the door opened, he glanced up to check if it was his new transfer student, but it took a bit for him to show up.

Finally, a student walked in who matched the photo of the transfer student.

Jun stepped up with a smile. “Hello. Are you Minato Arisato?” he asked politely.

The teen gave a quiet nod.

Jun kept his smile up. “Then you're new here, correct?”

Another nod.

Jun nodded in return. “Well, I'm Mr. Kashihara. I'll be teaching Composition. Welcome to our school.”

“Thanks…” the boy said, his voice quiet.

Jun let his smile grow a little lopsided. “I'm new to the school, too,” he admitted. “I don't know if you've checked the class assignments, but you'll be in my class, 2-F. But, before then, there's a Welcoming Ceremony in the auditorium that we should both get to. I'll show you the way.”

Arisato just nodded and followed him silently. Jun didn't hold the sullenness against him. Based on his file, after his parents died 10 years ago, he'd moved around a lot. That was plenty reason to be sullen, although Jun wouldn't say anything about something so personal, especially not to someone he had just met.

He led Arisato to the auditorium and took up position by the wall as the principal went into a prepared speech. He had to shush some students from time to time, trying his best to keep it on the gentler side.

And then it was time for classes. He introduced himself to his homeroom, let Arisato introduce himself, then got into his lesson plan. Despite the differences between Iwatodai and Sumaru, or Gekkoukan and Kasugayama, it felt good to get back into a familiar routine with each class he taught.

Chapter Text

Akira hates doctors. 

He's hated them for as long as he can remember. Because he moves around so much, every time he gets dragged to a doctor, it's someone new. Another adult reading through his record, paging through reports and files and analysis, sometimes looking up at Akira with the shocked expression that means they've found the brain damage, or the mutism, or whatever. Akira had stolen a copy of his records from a doctor a couple years ago, to find out for himself exactly what it says about him, but it had just depressed him and then made his head hurt. Morgana had shredded it the first time he caught Akira crying in sheer frustration over all the parts of himself he'll never understand.

So now he just deals with doctors by ignoring them while they read his stupid medical record, refusing to cooperate when they try to give him more tests that will just lead to more diagnoses to clutter up his file, and biting them.

The biting--

Okay that's not really dealing with the doctors, it's just a panic reaction to shots and needles. He doesn't even know where that part comes from, he's never even had a bad experience with needles that he can remember. But he just gets this cold-all-over panicky feeling, like something horrible is going to happen if they put those drugs in him, and anything could be in those needles.

He's bitten doctors, stomped on feet, broken medical supplies, and run away.

All because he really, really doesn't like needles.

The fact that more than once he's had to be held down to get a mandatory vaccination, or a blood draw for a test, does absolutely nothing to make him feel less afraid.

(He wishes cats were allowed in doctors' offices)

(But then again, he doesn't want Morgana to see how scared he is. He doesn't even understand it himself, so how could anyone else?)

Today's doctor hadn't given him any shots, at least so far. He'd done the eyebrow raising part, and asked Akira, "Can you really not talk?" which Akira had answered by crossing his arms and glaring at him. Then he'd looked in his ears, in his mouth, and up his nose. Noted down his height and his weight. Checked his heartbeat and told him to take deep breaths, and poked his knees with the hammer thing that made him accidentally kick the doctor anyway.

Then the doctor says, "Just one more thing."

And then comes the needle.

Akira is off the exam table and halfway to the door before he has time to even process how unusually huge the needle is. There is no way he's letting the doctor put that needle in him. Absolutely no way, and there's ice in his veins when the doctor as he shoves open the door and runs face first into a nurse.

"Oh no," she says. "Are you done with this one, doctor?"

"Not quite," the doctor says. "Bring him back in here?"

But Akira fights hard. He goes limp on the ground so the nurse can't drag him back in by herself, and when the doctor comes out to help, he goes back to the kicking and biting strategy. He has the wild, nonsense thought they've turned off the cameras, which means nothing to his brain but makes his heart race like he's in real danger. 

"What's going on in here?" a new voice asks, and Akira looks up in desperation, scanning for escape routes before he realizes it's just another stranger--another doctor, probably--standing in the doorway.

He dives for the floor anyway, and has almost made it through the gap between the man's legs and the door, under where he's holding the doorframe, when the man snags the back of his shirt with his other hand and stops him in place.

"He's giving us a hard time about the blood draw," the doctor says. "You know, for the new test. The one that's supposed to look for--"

"Yes, yes," the man says, cutting the doctor off quickly. "Well, I think just this once we can skip the blood draw."

Akira twists around so he can look up at the man, squinting at him suspiciously. 

"We'll just have a conversation," the man says. "We don't need-le to get into all that that particular test if it's going to be too hard on you."

Akira is so surprised by that pun (does it even count as a pun if it's that bad?) he stops fighting, and sort of accidentally lets the stranger prod him back into the exam room.

"If you're sure," the doctor says doubtfully.

"We'll be alright," the new guy says, waving the other two off. "Just let us talk for a few minutes."

"He can't actually--" the doctor starts to say, but the new guy closes the door in his face before he has the chance to finish pointing out that Akira can't talk. So... that'll be fun.

Akira hoists himself up onto the table, frowning, waiting to see if they're going to have to go back to the needle plan once this guy finds out he can't actually keep up his end of a conversation. He doesn't even have a notebook with him, and he doubts he's been lucky enough to stumble on someone that can sign.

"Let me introduce myself," the man says. "My name is Shuji Ikutsuki." He smiles, fake self deprecating. "A little bit of a tongue twister, but I'm sure you can say it if you give it a try."

Akira shakes his head no, and crosses his index fingers over his mouth. Batsu, no good, can't talk. 

"Something wrong with your mouth?" Ikutsuki asks. Akira doesn't answer, obviously, and Ikutsuki is just sitting there waiting and waiting for an explanation, so eventually Akira points at his file the doctor had abandoned. He hadn't gotten very far on his own stolen read through, but he'd gotten far enough to see the warnings about mutism right on page one.

Ikutsuki glances over, apparently sees that same warning, and says, "Ah." 

His eyebrows, of course, go up.

"Well," he says, his eyes still going down the first page of Akira's file with a speed that Akira's a little bit jealous of. "That's alright. I'll just ask you some questions, and you can tell me yes or no." He turns back to Akira, leaning forward slightly with his hands clasped together, and smiles a well practiced smile. "Do you ever have trouble sleeping..." A quick flick of his eyes back toward the page. "Akira?"

Akira shrugs, and wobbles a hand a little side to side. Sometimes.

"A little?" Ikutsuki asks. "Well, I suppose we all have at least a little trouble. Do you ever stay up all night because you can't sleep?"

This time Akira shakes his head no, letting his hand drop back down to his lap.

"Ever wake up in the middle of the night?"

He nods yes, then shrugs. Mimes sleeping and frowns exaggeratedly, then opens his eyes wide all at once in fake surprise.

"Nightmares?" Ikutsuki guesses, and Akira nods again.

"I'm sorry to hear that," Ikutsuki says. "Do you ever have nightmares that feel like you're awake?"

Akira thinks of his dreams of the whole world being green, and nods again, eyes dropping to the floor.

"What kind of dreams?" Ikutsuki asks, which at least distracts Akira enough to drag his gaze back up to him. He raises his eyebrows like how is he supposed to mime that, and Ikutsuki chuckles. "You're right," he says. "You're right, of course. Can you write, Akira?"

Akira is nine years old and about to start the fourth grade. Of course he can write. Not all the kanji adults can, but he knows more than a lot of his classmates, and anyway he's constantly writing to people that don't know how to sign. 

(It's just...)

(He hates it when people think his brain doesn't work just because his voice doesn't)

Ikutsuki turns over the top page on Akira's file, fishes a pen out of his pocket, and hands them both to Akira. "Tell me about your nightmares," he says.

So Akira writes. He doesn't explain them all, because it's kind of embarrassing how many different kinds he has, but there's only one that wakes him up a lot, and he writes about the weird green nightmares that make everyone else look like coffins, and at the end of it he scribbles what does this have to do with blood draws? and hands the whole thing back. 

"Good question," Ikutsuki murmurs. He eyes Akira, then asks, "You're probably smarter than a lot of kids your age, aren't you? I imagine you hear a lot."

Akira, who can tell when an adult is saying something nice so he'll like them, just shrugs.

"The truth is we think there's something in the water here that's inducing insomnia," Ikutsuki says. "I'm a teacher--well. I work at a school. And while of course I want to find out whatever's causing that insomnia, I'm also concerned for your mental health while you're suffering from it."

Oh great, Akira thinks. Here it is, the newest diagnosis.

"I'm so sorry," Ikutsuki says. "I know this is all probably very upsetting."

Akira sort of gestures at the file, to indicate that Ikutsuki's weird insomnia disease is going to have to get in line. He doesn't seem to get it, but that's probably fine. 

"Well I will note your name down either way," Ikutsuki says. "And I'll be in touch, Akira."

Akira shrugs, and watches him go. At least he hadn't had a blood draw, that's something, but this guy is weird.

Still, by the time he and everyone else from the foster home has been rounded up at the end of their government mandated yearly health exams, Akira has mostly managed to forget about weird Ikutsuki. He doesn't really think he'll see him again, and even if he comes looking, Akira will probably be on his way to a new foster home by then. He's already been at this one for three months, time's ticking. And it's not even like these are his only nightmares, so who cares? One more or one less, it's not going to make a difference.

It is kind of funny, though.

He's had these nightmares for ages. He's only been in Iwatodai for three months. So these can't be the nightmares Ikutsuki is talking about, or else Akira wouldn't be having them. Either that or Ikutsuki is lying about the water here or whatever’s causing it, but...

But he doesn't really care that much about what one specific nightmare means, and Morgana is skulking around the corner from the hospital waiting to meet up with him, and Akira feels much better when the cat is back in his arms. He doesn't bother thinking anymore about Ikutsuki, because he doesn't think Ikutsuki is going to bother thinking anymore about him.

He's wrong, though.

A week later, Ikutsuki is at the foster home, asking for him by name. 

Chapter Text

On the day Ikutsuki came to the foster home, Akira had gleefully hidden himself in a corner to read the latest letter from Goro Akechi.

Like most things between them, the letters had become a competition before long. Both boys were prone to getting shuffled to a new foster home sooner than later. But, rather than send a letter after moving so the other boy had their new address, it became a game to find out when and where the other had moved. The faster they could send a letter, the better they’d done.

So, this was the first letter Akira had sent or received since moving to Tatsumi Port Island. He couldn’t send a letter until Goro found him on his own. Otherwise it ruined the game. And no one else sent him mail, and Akira didn't have anyone else he wanted to write letters to either.

The letter started off bragging about what Goro had done to track Akira down this time, before moving on to other topics. Most of it had an implicit challenge. “These are my grades. (Can you do better?)” “I got this score at the arcade. (Can you beat it?)”

There were questions about his new foster home, too. How the foster parent was, how the other kids were. He asked after Morgana and talked about the latest thing someone had done to annoy him.

Akira drank in the words, already mentally penning replies. But when two other boys from the group home came into the room, both gossiping excitedly, he folded up the letter and paid attention, his body going tense. Rumors were important. Knowing what the people around him thought was important, even though it was usually incorrect. The letter would be there when the boys were gone.

“He went into the office with Fukuhara,” one boy was saying. Fukuhara was in charge of the group home.

“And you didn't recognize him?”

“No, and you know I'm good with faces. And guess what?”

“What?”

“I heard him mention Kurusu!”

This was clearly juicy gossip to both boys. Akira held himself very still. Morgana’s ears had perked forward from his place next to him, like he was listening too. Why was someone asking for him?

“What does this guy want with Kurusu?”

“Beats me.”

The boys moved on to another room, their voices fading as the conversation switched topics. Akira carefully unfolded from his corner, slipping the letter into a pocket, and set off for Fukuhara’s office. Maybe he could eavesdrop. Morgana slipped into his hoodie pocket as he got up.

Unfortunately, he made it there just in time for the door to open, revealing Fukuhara and… was that the weirdo from the check up? Iku-something.

Whatever his name was, his eyes lit up when saw Akira. “Ah, just the young man we were discussing! Kuru-super timing!”

Akira frowned at the strange pun, as Fukuhara gave the man a sidelong look. “Hello, Akira,” he said with a small smile. “This is Shuji Ikutsuki. He's the Chairman of the Board for Gekkoukan High School, although he tells me you've met already?”

(Fukuhara was far from the worst guardian Akira had ever had. He didn't actively try to hurt anyone as far as Akira could tell, but he didn't go above and beyond in any way. He was fine. The most annoying thing about him was his habit of treating Akira like he was fragile or stupid. Not as an insult, but it still annoyed Akira.)

Akira nodded cautiously. Why was he here?

Ikutsuki took over talking. “I just finished clearing it with your guardian, and I've been talking to your teachers about this too, but I have an opportunity for you. You're very advanced academically, right?”

Akira felt his spine stiffen. This seemed suspicious. But he nodded along.

Ikutsuki clasped his hands together in front of him. “I think you would benefit from access to more advanced subjects. And it would lighten your guardian's load if, sometimes, someone else could look after you after your classes finish.”

Akira hid his grimace as he mentally finished that statement. ‘Because you're a problem because you can't talk.’ Ikutsuki would probably use politer words, but Akira knew it was what he meant.

Ikutsuki kept talking, though. “So, a few days a week, I'd like to bring you over to the high school after classes. You can learn more advanced stuff, and I'll keep an eye out for you. What do you say, Akira? Does it sound s-cool?”

Akira gave him a deadpan look at the pun, even as Fukuhara gave an awkward chuckle. But it sounded like this was already decided. He doubted he had much of a choice in the matter. So he shrugged, then nodded.

“Great!” Ikutsuki said, clapping his hands together. “Then, tomorrow after school, I'll pick you up in front of the elementary school and walk you to the high school.”

Akira could have protested that he knew where the high school was. But he didn't. It wasn't worth the effort. He'd try this out. At least it would give him something to do after classes.

After Ikutsuki left, Fukuhara said, “Ikutsuki is a very influential man, at least as far as your education goes, Akira. This could be something that pushes you forward in life, makes you important connections. I want you to be good for him, okay?”

Akira scuffed his feet against the floor and nodded. Chairman of a school board was pretty important, he guessed. He'd see how things went with Ikutsuki. He seemed fine for now. If he wasn't, Akira didn't care how important he was. He'd get out of there.

—

It was about a week after school started when Jun got an email from the chairman of the school board. It looked like it had been sent to the entire faculty.

Dear Gekkoukan High School Faculty,

I had hoped to explain this to the majority of you in person, but pressing matters mean I can't. Starting today, the elementary student Akira Kurusu will be spending several days a week after school in the faculty lounge, exploring more advanced academic subjects.

A small note about Kurusu: He is mute and communicates via Japanese Sign Language or writing.

This should not be a disruption to your work, but I wanted to let you all know.

Regards,
Shuji Ikutsuki

Jun had been wrapping up after the end of the school day in one of the classrooms, but, upon seeing that message, he decided to head to the faculty office. The way the email had been written almost made it sound like the kid was there without Ikutsuki.

When he got to the office, he found two things of note. An elementary school student, sitting in a corner staring down at an open textbook, and a note on his own desk. He checked out the note first.

Jun Kashihara,
Would you be able to test Kurusu's reading comprehension today? He has aphasia but I don’t know how much it affects his reading. Sorry I can't ask in person, something urgent came up!
-Ikutsuki

(Elsewhere, Ikutsuki was indeed busy. Just after walking Kurusu to the high school he’d gotten word that the new transfer student had woken up in the hospital. Kurusu was a potential piece on the board, but his mutism and age would make it harder for him to fit with the team Ikutsuki was building. The child didn't even know the Dark Hour as more than a nightmare. Arisato, on the other hand, provided a fantastic new opportunity. Ikutsuki had to be ready for him. He had Kurusu available to him now, if he ever needed him, but Arisato came first, at least for now.)

Jun felt his lips twist in distaste. Ikutsuki really should have approached him about this before bringing the kid here. But it was what it was. And, looking at the kid's slumped shoulders, Jun knew he couldn't let the kid just sit here for however long.

He’d have to photocopy some passages for a reading comprehension test, but the first step was to meet the young student. So Jun took a deep breath, put on a small smile, then approached the kid, pulling up a chair.

“Hi! I'm Mr. Kashihara. You're Akira Kurusu, right?” he asked.

Akira glanced up at him. Jun felt his breath catch as he met intense, dark gray eyes.

Something about that gaze made his stomach clench and his heart speed up.

He'd known for a long time that there was a part of him that was fiercely possessive. It woke up for his family, for some of his closest friends. Jun did his best to not let that part control him, of course. But it never woke up for a stranger before.

Meeting Akira's eyes made that beast wake up, though. That part of him roared mine. Jun pushed it down, pushed down his own panic over the reaction. He could figure it out later.

This all happened in the moments before Akira nodded in response.

Keeping up the friendly smile, Jun spoke up again. “Do you have something to write with, and on? Ikutsuki sent the faculty an email saying you'd be here, and he said you communicate by writing and JSL, but I don't know JSL…”

The kid nodded and pulled a notepad and a pencil from his pocket. He wrote something down, then showed Jun.

Why are you talking to me?

Jun cringed a bit. “Sorry, I maybe should have led with that. Ikutsuki asked me to test your reading comprehension today. If you're up for it, I'd get you a couple short passages to read, and then you'd answer questions about the passages. How does that sound?”

Akira shrugged, writing again. Sounds fine, he wrote.

Jun mentally made a note to pick up some books on JSL or something. It would likely be easier on Akira. Even if Ikutsuki didn't ask him to help out again, it sounded like Akira would be around more.

“Okay, before we get started,” Jun continued. “When do you need to be home? And are your parents or someone walking you home, or are you walking yourself?”

Akira remained nearly expressionless as he wrote out a reply. The foster home wants me back by 6pm. I can walk myself.

Jun couldn't stop himself from cringing at his own words. “Oh, um… sorry, I didn't know.”

Akira just shrugged.

The thing was, the kid was so serious, so guarded. So Jun wanted to brighten up his day a little. Maybe it had something to do with that possessive beast in his gut, or maybe it was just altruistism.

Jun tried to ask Akira what he liked to read, hoping he could get him passages that he'd enjoy, but he just got shrugs and polite non-answers.

So he had to guess. He chose some passages around the appropriate reading level for a 10 year old, plus some both above and below that level, then wrote up some comprehension questions and gave them to Akira. He paid attention to Akira as he read, even as he pretended to focus on his own paperwork. He tried to pay attention to how Akira reacted to each passage.

(For most of the initial batch of passages, he hardly reacted. Sometimes he'd click his tongue against the roof of his mouth, but Jun didn't know if that meant anything. For a few of them, though, he seemed to get more intense. Once for a folktale about a trickster spirit. And once for a passage about a historical pirate. Moving forward after that, Jun tried to find more passages that hit that kind of note, with trickster protagonists. And he was rewarded with more of that intense focus. Even a small smile from time to time.)

Jun also took notes on how long it took Akira to get through each passage. He read through Akira's answers to the comprehension questions, taking notes. He kept an eye out for signs of boredom or exhaustion, too. When Akira got tired, Jun would stop him and send him for a break to get some water and stretch his legs.

It took Akira a while to come back, and Jun started to get worried. What if he got lost in the school? Or what if he ran off while on Jun's watch?

But he came back maybe 15 or 20 minutes later, and he didn't look upset. Jun thought he saw something fuzzy and black and white disappear over Akira’s shoulder, but it was gone before he could identify it. So Jun didn't say anything about it. This was all extra work, after all. Akira should be able to take as many breaks as he needed.

After the break, Jun led Akira through some more passages, but he was starting to get a handle on Akira's reading level.

After a few more passages, Jun turned to Akira. “I think we've done enough for the day,” he said, and smiled when Akira slumped in relief. “I hope I managed to pick things to read that aren't too boring at least.”

Akira gave an awkward shrug, not meeting Jun’s eyes. Jun was about to start discussing his reading level, when Akira started to write. Some of those were from books, right? What were the books? Where can I find them?

Jun kept himself from breaking out in a triumphant grin. “I can write up a list for you,” he said. “Most, if not all, should be at the high school library. I can look and see which ones are at the elementary school library, and let you know the next time you come here.”

Jun quickly scribbled out a list, just focusing on the later ones he seemed to enjoy. Then he tacked on the other ones at the end. Finally, he added a small description for each book, and handed it over.

“I left out the few you seemed to struggle with. They're pretty tough reads. But I can add them if you want.”

Akira shook his head.

Jun continued. “As for your reading level, you seem about high school level, although it looked like it took you longer to get through that kind of stuff.”

Akira hung his head.

“There's no shame in that!” he continued. “Most kids your age probably couldn't comprehend those kinds of passages at all.”

Akira kept looking embarrassed, and Jun bit his lip, trying to figure out the right thing to say. “What's important, especially at your age, is just to enjoy reading. It doesn't matter one way or the other how complicated the books are.”

Akira gave an awkward shrug, and Jun sighed, giving up for the moment. “Well, I'll write something up for Ikutsuki,” he said. “It's a little early, but you can head out if you'd like. And it was very nice to meet you, Akira.”

Akira glanced up at him, his expression searching. Jun tried to project how much he was telling the truth. He wasn't sure why, but he really did enjoy spending a few hours with Akira.

Akira looked him over for a moment, before nodding. Jun could only hope that his sincerity came through.

And then Akira scooped up his bag and headed out. Jun watched him go until the door closed behind him, before making himself focus on his actual work.

Checking his emails again, he got a bit of good news. Minato Arisato had been out of classes sick for a week, but it looked like he'd be coming back the next day.

But, despite his best efforts to focus on his work, his mind kept slipping back to Akira. On his way out for the day, he borrowed a book on JSL from the library. It wouldn't hurt to learn the basics.

Chapter Text

The school year started nearly a month ago. Jun had been heading for the faculty lounge when something caught his eye. One of the nearby club rooms had the door cracked open. A glance in the door’s window showed no one inside, though. Jun could have just closed the door and continued on, but some instinct made him go in. And, once he was in the room, his eyes were drawn to a small figure on the floor. Akira, with a paperback book open in front of him, and… a kitten in his lap. Akira and the kitten were both frozen, their eyes trained on him.

—

Akira had just wanted to get away. He hated being in the teacher’s lounge, with far too many eyes around him. The textbooks Ikutsuki had given him were often a struggle to get through, although it was more from boredom than it was from an inability to understand. He’d tried to read his own books, ones he’d borrowed from either the elementary or high school library, but someone had scolded him for it, saying he should focus on academics. Besides, he felt bad for Morgana. There was no desk for him to hide inside, so he was stuck in Akira’s school bag.

So, he made his escape. The teachers in the lounge had gotten into a loud conversation, providing the perfect opportunity. Akira carefully slipped out of the teacher’s lounge, acting like he had every right to do what he was doing. Then he found a nearby empty room to hole up in and let Morgana out.

Only now Mr. Kashihara had found him. Mr. Kashihara had been nice enough before, but he’d just found Akira breaking an unspoken rule, plus he found Morgana. Akira braced for yelling.

Instead, Mr. Kashihara scanned him over and smiled. “Let me guess, you got bored of those textbooks and wanted some alone time?” he asked.

Akira nodded cautiously.

Mr. Kashihara came in and took a seat on a chair. “Oh, I should tell you, I’ve started learning JSL like I said! I’ve got fingerspelling down pretty well at this point, although my vocabulary is pretty small.” He held up his hands and carefully signed out. Hello. I-t i-s n-i-c-e t-o s-e-e you a-g-a-i-n.

Akira blinked in shock. The movements were clumsy but clear enough. Fingerspelling everything took quite a bit longer, but it still opened up more avenues for Akira to communicate. He’d never expected anyone to learn JSL for him, especially not a man he’d only spent a few hours with, plus occasionally seeing him around over the past week or so. It left him off balance.

Mr. Kashihara waited for a reply, but Akira couldn’t think of how to respond, so the teacher dropped his hands and shifted awkwardly. “Who’s your little friend?” he asked.
Akira looked down at Morgana and felt his shoulders hunch. He finger-spelled out his words. A-r-e y-o-u g-o-i-n-g t-o t-e-l-l s-o-m-e-o-n-e?

Mr. Kashihara considered this for a moment, then shook his head. “He seems well-behaved. And I won’t tell anyone you left the staff room. You needed a break, and that’s perfectly valid.”

Akira relaxed a little, then glanced down at his cat. H-i-s n-a-m-e i-s M-o-r-g-a-n-a Akira signed, before performing Morgana’s name sign.

“Morgana,” Mr. Kashihara repeated. “And that’s his name sign, right?”

Akira nodded.

Mr. Kashihara repeated the motion with his own hands, and Akira felt himself smile just a little. He quickly squashed the feeling. Just because Mr. Kashihara had been nice so far didn’t mean Akira could just start trusting him all the time. He barely knew the man.

Mr. Kashihara crouched down and held out a hand towards Morgana. And, despite Akira’s own confusion and misgivings, the cat bounded out of Akira’s lap to rub against the hand, letting out a cheerful meow. Mr. Kashihara began to pet him, and Morgana immediately began purring while Akira stared. Morgana had never reacted like this to anyone before, except maybe to Akira himself. The closest comparison was to how he reacted to Goro, pushing him and Akira together when they first met. There was a deliberate nature to both Morgana’s actions then and now, although there were differences. With Goro, Morgana very clearly wanted the two of them to interact. Akira considered Morgana as he turned back to rub against Akira’s knee. It was like Morgana was saying he liked Mr. Kashihara. Trusted him. It was so strange to see, though, especially since Mr. Kashihara was an adult.

Silence stretched out between the small group as Akira considered this message, looking between the cat and the teacher. He couldn’t think of what to say. He had no idea what to do with the idea that Morgana trusted this adult.

After long moments of silence, Mr. Kashihara beamed at Akira. “Thanks for introducing us,” he said, his hands moving through the sign for thank you.

Akira had no idea what to do with that warm smile or the way it made something tug in his chest, just as he had no idea what to do with Morgana’s show of trust, so he ducked his head and signed back. Thank you f-o-r n-o-t t-e-l-l-i-n-g, M-r. K-a-s-h-i-h-a-r-a.

“It’s no problem. And…” An odd, pensive look passed across the teacher’s face. “Why don’t you call me Jun? That’s my given name. You’re not my student, so there’s no need to be too formal. Plus it should be easier to sign.”

Akira rocked back a little, his breath catching. He felt a burn behind his eyes and looked away before any tears could gather. Mr. Kashihara, or Jun, was reaching out so hard, and Akira had no idea why. He wanted to suspect a trick, a nasty adult trying to get his trust to use him or hurt him, but something in him balked at thinking Jun would do that. And Morgana had always been a good judge of character. So he would be cautious, but he wouldn’t run away from this, not yet.
J-u-n he signed, and Jun’s smile grew, before he looked around the empty club room.

“How about I show you somewhere a little nicer for you to hide out when you need a break?” he asked. “After all, sometimes this club room will be in use.”

Akira considered this, then scooped up his book and Morgana, slipping both into his bag, although Morgana poked his head out. O-k-a-y he signed, getting to his feet. Jun got to his own feet, brushing off his pants, then led the way.

Jun ended up taking him to a small courtyard with a persimmon tree in it. He was right. It was nicer than the empty club room. He liked being outside.

Soon after, Jun let him be with his book, heading back to whatever he’d been up to before he found Akira. Akira did his best to focus on the book, but his thoughts kept drifting back to the teacher. What did he want? Why was he so nice for no reason? He couldn’t figure it out.

Chapter Text

On a certain Sunday at the start of May, Minato Arisato looked around his dorm room dully, trying to think of how to spend his day. Then, he remembered the game Junpei had given him. With the internet back online, and on a day with no school, he could waste some time trying it out.

He slipped the disk into his computer and looked over the game box as the game booted up. Innocent Sin Online. The box proclaimed it was Based on a True Story! which was a weird thing for an MMO to try, but maybe that would make it more interesting.

When the game started, he was thrust into character creation, with an avatar standing in a field of purple flowers while random tooltips popped up at the bottom of the screen. He didn’t put much effort into the character creation. He kept the default avatar and chose his class and options mostly at random. The screen name gave him a brief pause, but then he noticed the current tooltip.

This is a field of shion flowers. In Hanakotoba, Shions mean Remembrance.

He didn’t care about the trivia much, but Shion seemed like as good a name as any. He typed it in, expecting to get told the name was taken and already planning to add some numbers in. But, apparently, the name was available. So, with a mental shrug, he sent his character into the world.

Before he could get started with any gameplay, a text box appeared on screen

Autumn, the year 199X. I have one new message. From: "PHIL." Reality is just a series of events and players acting out what they believe to be true. When we accept that fact, our world becomes as real as any other. Reality is but a reflection of our own thoughts and expectations. But... what if we were merely reflections in someone else's mirror? Are you prepared to look through that mirror to discover the truth?

Minato clicked out of the message, rolling his eyes at how philosophical the game was already getting. But then he could finally move around. So he dove into all the tutorial quests, letting the game take all his focus.

An hour or two later, he finally ran into another player. He thought it was weird that he hadn’t seen anyone around, but figured he might have been in a tutorial area where you can’t see other players.

The other avatar was a dark-haired woman in a red dress. She approached his avatar and typed out a message.

Joker: Hi! Are you a new player too? This place seems pretty dead.

Minato clicked into the chat box to reply.

Shion: Yeah, I just started today.
Joker: Neat! Technically, I made my account a couple weeks ago, but I’ve only been able to play for a day or two.
Joker: Oh, ignore my screen name. It somehow got auto-assigned and apparently you can’t change it.
Joker: I like your screen name, though! Flowers are neat. So… how about you call me Iris instead? It means good news, and loyalty.

Minato frowned. He was pretty sure some of the tutorial quests had mentioned someone called Joker, who definitely seemed like an antagonist. There was something about calling your own phone number?

Shion: Yeah, Joker would be confusing given the game character. Iris works.
Joker: You get it! Thanks, Shion!

Joker: Actually, you’re the first person I’ve run into in this game. I think it’s a couple years old, so the community must have just died out… So, since there’s not many people around, would you want to form a party?
Shion: It’s dangerous to go alone. Sure.
Joker: Lol, nice reference.
Joker: I should be around most Sundays. I just moved to a new city so I don’t have a lot of people to hang out with on days off.
Joker: There, I’ve sent you a friend request.

Minato got the pop-up notification and hit “Accept”.

Shion: You’re added.
Joker: Nice! So do you want to get going and fight some demons?

They ended up spending most of the day together online. Iris liked to discuss the plot points that came up, but Minato liked to just focus on the gameplay, which was well designed and satisfying. They made a good team, too. Minato focused more on offense, playing a physical class with a sword. Iris had chosen a class that made potions or something? She could do buffs, and healing, and also throw flowers at enemies, so she had ranged covered.The story seemed kind of creepy and kind of surreal, verging into bizarre. Finally, Iris had to log off, so Minato did as well. He stretched as he got up from his chair, then wandered out of his room to get some food. That had been fun. And Iris seemed nice. He’d definitely play with her again.

—
Yet another Sunday, and Minato found himself playing Innocent Sin Online with Iris when she started up a conversation.

Joker: You know how the game says it’s based on a true story?
Shion: Yeah. I figured it was just marketing.
Joker: Oh… No, I’m pretty sure I know what it’s basing this off of. It’s a really weird choice, honestly.
Joker: I don’t really want to go into it, but if you look up the Sumaru City Crisis, from 1999, you should find the info.
Joker: I guess they really wanted to make something creepy. Do you like scary stories?
Shion: They’re definitely fun.
Joker: Exactly! Letting yourself get spooked is so much fun.

Shion: Did you find something, Iris?

Her avatar turned to face him, but it took her a bit to actually reply.

Joker: I don’t think I like these quests.
Shion: Yeah, they seem like they’re all meant-to-lose. It’s a bummer.
Joker: I wonder what kind of person that Joker in the game is supposed to be.
Shion: Isn’t he based on a serial killer? They probably didn’t put much thought into it.
Joker: Oh. Yeah, you’re right.
Shion: Let’s go find some demons to fight.
Joker: Yeah, yeah, definitely.
Joker: Thanks, Shion. I think I got lost in my head a little.

—

When they weren’t questing or talking about the game itself, sometimes they talked about life. Always somewhat vaguely. Iris talked about flowers she’d seen. She mentioned Paulownia Mall once, so Minato knew she was in the same city as him.

Another time, the conversation drifted to moving.

Joker: So I mentioned I moved to my city recently, right? Have you ever moved before?
Shion: I’ve moved around a lot.
Joker: Wow, that sounds annoying to deal with. This is my first time moving away from the city I grew up in, and I’m scrambling to figure out how to meet people. How do you handle it?

Minato had to think over his answer for a moment. The truth was, before this year, he’d usually pulled away from anyone new. But this year, he was making bonds. How had he done that?

He thought over a couple ways he could answer it, before settling on a joking tone.

Shion: I joined a dead MMO and met someone there.
Joker: Point taken lol! And I do like hanging out with you.
Joker: I guess I’ve never had that many friends anyways. I can get by with my family and my coworkers. And you, of course!
Joker: Thanks for being there, Shion.
Shion: Happy to help.

Chapter Text

Akira didn’t know why he’d been moved to Iwatodai, but he never knew why he was moved to different foster homes. They were just the place he was sent next. For the most part, one city was about the same as any other. But at least Iwatodai had a shrine with a playground within walking distance of his foster home. Akira ended up spending a lot of time there, because it was someplace people expected kids to be, so nobody gave him suspicious looks for hanging around there. And anywhere was better than staying at the overcrowded foster home, or spending any time longer than he had to at the high school.

Sometimes other kids came to play at the shrine, too. Sometimes they were nice, sometimes they were not. One kid who came around a lot was a girl named Maiko. She was one of the nicer ones, a cheerful girl who liked to play with whoever was around. She’d even play with Akira if he was there, and she didn’t seem to mind talking to him even if he couldn’t talk back.

One day Akira was at the shrine, digging in the sandbox with Maiko, when a white dog ran up. Akira immediately scooped up Morgana and backed away from the dog. That made the dog stop and tilt his head, whining.

“Doggy!” Maiko said. She started to run up to the dog, then noticed that Akira was still backing away. Looking over at him, she asked, “Huh? Don’t you like dogs?”

It wasn’t that Akira didn’t like dogs, necessarily. He was just afraid that the dog would try to chase Morgana. Dogs liked to chase cats, right? And Morgana was a rather little cat. But he couldn’t really explain that, so he just pointed to Morgana and made a worried noise.

Maiko looked at Morgana, then she looked at the dog. Then she laughed and said, “He won’t hurt your kitty! He’s a good doggy, aren't you?” As if in answer, the dog walked slowly up to Akira and laid down in front of him, tail wagging.

Akira watched the dog suspiciously for a moment. But Maiko just sat down and started petting him, which made him pant happily. Maiko started chattering, “I heard one of the neighborhood aunties talking about him. I think his name’s, um…Koromaru?” The dog woofed softly, making Maiko giggle. As she scratched Koromaru’s ears, she continued, “The auntie said he used to live at the shrine, but the priest died, so he’s on his own now.”

That made Akira frown and hug Morgana a little tighter. He knew what it was like to be alone. At least Akira had Morgana now, but if the dog didn’t have anyone at all, he must be lonely. Maybe he was just looking for someone to spend some time with. So slowly, Akira crouched down and started to pet the dog’s back. Koro just wagged his tail and panted. Even when Morgana hopped down from Akira’s arms and sniffed at Koromaru, the dog just lay there quietly and let the cat investigate him.

Akira and Maiko sat there petting Koromaru for a few minutes. Then Maiko jumped up and shouted, “Hey doggy, wanna play?” Koromaru climbed to his feet too and barked.

“Yay!” Maiko cheered. She started to look around the playground, then noticed the street lights had come on. “Oh,” she said in a more subdued tone. “It’s getting late. I gotta get home.” So instead she waved at Koromaru and Akira and said, “Bye-bye! Let’s play again sometime, OK?”

Koromaru barked and Akira waved. But when Maiko ran off, Akira stayed where he was. He didn’t want to go back to the foster home until he had to. It wasn’t really dark yet, he could get away with it.

After a moment, Koromaru looked up at Akira, looked where Maiko had gone, looked back at Akira, and whined. It was almost like he was asking why Akira wasn’t leaving, too. Akira’s first thought was that dogs weren’t smart enough for that, but he immediately remembered that Morgana was definitely smart enough for that. Morgana was probably a special cat, but maybe Koromaru was a special dog.

Still, Akira didn’t want to explain why he didn’t want to go home yet. He doubted a dog could understand sign language anyway. So he decided to just play with Koromaru a bit to keep him company. He didn’t have any dog toys or anything, but he looked around under the tree until he found a stick, then held it up for Koromaru to see. The dog immediately seemed to get the point, and he started bouncing around, barking eagerly. So Akira threw the stick, and Koromaru chased after it.

Akira stayed at the shrine for a while longer, playing with Koromaru. Sometimes he’d throw the stick and Koromaru would fetch it. Sometimes Akira and Morgana and Koromaru would chase each other around. Sometimes they’d get tired and they’d sit so Akira could pet Koromaru for a while, before they all got their energy back and jumped up to play again.

It was nice. Koromaru didn’t seem to care that Akira couldn’t talk, and he didn’t look at Akira like he was weird. He didn’t feel safe, exactly, but that was good because safe was bad. Yet Koromaru didn’t feel dangerous either, and he didn’t expect anything from him besides pets and play. For a little while Akira didn’t have to think about anything more complicated than whether he wanted to throw the stick or pet the dog some more.

Eventually it got too dark and Morgana started meowing at Akira, and he knew he couldn’t put off going back to the foster home any longer. So he petted Koromaru one more time and started to head back. Koromaru walked him back to the entrance of the shrine, then stopped on the steps and barked as if saying goodbye. Akira gave him a wave as he left. If Koromaru was at the shrine next time he came, maybe they could play again sometime.

Chapter Text

When Minato first met the kid he’d one day know as Akira, it was in a convenience store, in May. And, saying that they ‘met’ was a bit of a stretch. Rather, Minato turned into one of the aisles near the back and saw him stuffing a handful of cereal bars into his jacket pocket. The kid snapped his head over to look at him, and for a moment everything was still. Minato considered the situation, decided it wasn’t any of his business, and shrugged. Then moved on to the next aisle.

He saw the kid at checkout buying a can of coffee (not a cereal bar in sight) about a minute later. He wouldn’t see him again until June. In a rather unexpected place at that.

—

The next time they met was in June, when Minato had been investigating a “ghost story.”

That was was supposed to be fun. You listen to some urban legends, you tell your friends about what you heard in a slow and spooky voice, someone (in this case probably Yukari) says they’re getting the heebie jeebies. But instead they stepped right into a case of bullying, and what was seeming more and more like some sort of Shadow incident.

Now, here they were. Getting called into the faculty office by Mitsuru to listen to the testimony of the only bully who hadn’t mysteriously fallen ill… yet. While she admitted to locking Fuuka in the gym overnight, only to find her missing the next morning, he caught sight of the kid.

He was sitting at an empty desk reading a textbook, but was sneaking glances over to the group. From the look on his face, he understood what was going on completely, and he wasn’t happy about it. His displeasure was directed more at the teacher than the bully though. Which was understandable. Because the teacher, Mr. Ekoda, had apparently hidden the fact that Fuuka had gone missing a week ago.

“I was thinking of the students, of course.” Mr. Ekoda said defensively. “You children may not understand, but we have to consider the future of everyone affected.”

The kid blew a loud raspberry in response to Mr. Ekoda’s defense.

“Yeah. I’m with the kid. You’re just covering your own hide!” Junpei said. Then, he leaned in close to Minato and whispered. “Hey. What’s a kid that young doing here anyway?”

Minato shrugged, looking at them with interest. He and the kid locked eyes, and a flash of recognition crossed his face. Then, he turned back to his textbooks. Minato was pulled back into the discussion, and the mystery of the kid in the faculty office was put on the back burner. He’d try and remember to ask Mitsuru about it later when she wasn’t busy making Mr. Ekoda regret his poor choices.

—

A week later, after Fuuka had been rescued and he'd gotten over the exhaustion that always came from staying up late to fight shadows, he found an excuse to go to the faculty office. And there was the kid, looking down bored at a textbook that seemed way too advanced for someone his age. He looked up when Minato approached, and stiffened when he recognized him. Then hastily smiled politely.

"Aren’t you a little young to be a school teacher?" He asked, in the hopes some humor would put him at ease. It didn’t seem to work exactly. The kid stared at him, unmoving smile plastered on his face.

"Alright. Shy kid." He thought to himself. Not wanting to keep making them uncomfortable, he decided to leave. But just as he was turning to go, Ikutsuki showed up.

"Ah! Minato. Good to see you. I see that you've met Akira,” the chairman said. “I hope he's not causing you too much trouble.”

"Not at all. I just thought I'd say hi since I recognize him from around town." He explained. The kid, Akira, stiffened up again.

"At the shrine perhaps? I understand he spends a lot of his free time there."

"Yup. You got it in one." Minato lied. And was happy to see Akira relax a little for once.

"Well, I'm glad to see him making a friend. Apparently he has trouble with that. Such is the curse of genius I suspect." Ikutsuki said, glancing over to the apparent genius in question. Akira immediately went back to smiling politely.

"Is that why he's here studying high school math?" Minato asked.

"Indeed! It was determined to be a better use of his time to study material more suited for his extraordinary academic intelligence at his own pace. I volunteered to watch out for him on occasion during school hours when I heard about his situation. On top of being isolated for his intelligence, he's also an orphan. I'd hate to see such potential go to waste simply on account of being abandoned like that."

Akira's smile seemed to grow a little bit bigger. Meanwhile Minato's opinion of Ikutsuki dropped noticeably. And he didn't have a high opinion of him to begin with. Nothing personal against the guy. He seemed nice enough. Minato just hated anyone who liked puns on principle. But the way he talked about Akira didn't sit right with him.

"Anyway, if you two are done, it's about time I escorted Akira back to the foster home. Gather up your things, we should be off."

Akira did just that, and Minato made a mental note to check around the shrine more often. It might be worth making Akira feel less lonely. After all, Minato knew what it was like to be the lonely kid in the orphanage.

---

One afternoon, maybe a week later, Minato made his way to the shrine playground. The girl he’d met last month, Maiko, wasn't there. But Akira was. He hung upside down, suspended by his knees in the jungle gym. The kid had a bit of a grin on his face as he gestured at a black and white kitten perched on a bar in front of him. But then Minato took a step closer and the cat and the boy turned in unison and stared at him. Akira turned on that polite smile he'd worn in the office with Ikutsuki, while the cat narrowed its eyes at him in what looked like suspicion.

So Minato stopped where he was, removing a hand from his pocket to wave. “Hey there. Cute cat,” he said.

Akira gave a polite wave, before quickly scrambling down to the ground and outside the bars of the jungle gym.

He pulled a little notebook and pencil from his pocket and scribbled something down, still wearing that polite smile.

When he passed the notebook over, Minato read Why did you lie to Ikutsuki about where you saw me?

Minato handed it back with a shrug. “It's none of my business what you do. I'm not a snitch,” he replied.

Akira seemed to consider this for a moment before his polite smile dropped, leaving a guarded and wary look.

He started writing again. As he did, the kitten hopped onto Akira's shoulder, still staring at Minato. He hopped to the ground and approached, circling around Minato without touching him, sniffing his shoes and legs.

Minato felt a bit of a smile tug at his face. It was a very cute cat.

Suddenly, the cat's ears pricked forward as it stared up at Minato with startlingly blue eyes and meowed at him. It trotted back to Akira, rubbing against his legs just as Akira finished writing and handed over the notepad.

Beneath the previous words, Akira had written, Did you come here to look for me? Why?

Also the cat's name is Morgana.

Minato scanned the words before handing back the notepad and shoving his hands in his pockets as he thought over his answer. He could lie and say he was here by coincidence. He could say he came to look for Akira because he seemed lonely, but that might come across as patronizing. The final option left his mouth dry with nerves. He already didn't talk much, but talking about his past, about growing up with no parents? He'd normally never do it. He didn't want the pity. He didn't want to touch the deeply buried emotions, or discuss the numbness overtop. Even with his team… Despite knowing about some of their pasts, Minato could never bring himself to speak about his own.

But the expression on Akira's face looked like he'd tolerate no bullshit. So he forced the words out, and forced them to sound casual. “I did come here to look for you. I've been through the foster system too, so I figured you might be lonely.”

An awkward pause as Akira kept staring at him.

Minato looked down at the kitten. “It's nice to meet you, Morgana.”

Morgana meowed back as if saying hi in return, and both taciturn boys smiled a little. Then, Morgana shifted behind Akira, headbutting his ankle. Akira glanced back at the cat, then sighed and wrote out a new line.

Fine, you can hang around if you want, Minato read.

When Minato handed back the notepad, Akira stuffed it in his pocket and motioned for Minato to follow as he headed to the sandbox.

The two played for a while in near silence, and Minato watched as Akira slowly relaxed. As the sun dipped low in the sky, though, Akira looked at his little watch and straightened up. Making eye contact with Minato, he pointed at the watch, then himself, then the exit of the Shrine.

“Time for you to go?” Minato guessed, and Akira nodded, but he didn’t go immediately.

After a long moment of staring at his scuffed shoes, he dug out his notepad and wrote out a final message.

Will you come spend time with me here again?

Minato nodded as he handed the notepad back. “Sure. I'll see you again.”

Minato was treated to a tiny smile on the boy's face before Akira waved and walked off, Morgana perched on his shoulder.

In his chest, Minato felt a new bond begin to hum. Hope. Huh, neat.

—

Minato came back to the playground a lot in the next few days. Sometimes Maiko was there. Sometimes Akira was. It was nice outside, and nice to spend time out at the playground and the shrine.

The next time he spent time with Akira, things were easier. Akira didn’t even get off the jungle gym when he saw him, just waved and beckoned him over. He smiled just a bit when Minato offered to hang out for a while.

They played around for a while, until both of them got tired, sitting on top of the jungle gym. Akira had Morgana in his lap, stroking his fur as he stared at the shrine tree. Minato had one headphone in, losing himself in the music. The current song was more upbeat that most of what he listened to, but it was catchy. And it felt right for hanging out with little kids and helping them enjoy the start of summer.

He didn’t even realized he’d started whistling until he heard Akira blow a raspberry. A glance over showed the kid scowling, before puffing up his cheeks and blowing, no sound coming out.

“Are you trying to whistle?” Minato asked.

Akira hunched his shoulders and nodded, starting to gesture before stopping himself and pulling out his notepad.

I can’t figure it out. he wrote.

Minato felt something tighten a little in his chest. His heart ached for some reason. His response fell from his lips before he could think it over.

“I could teach you.”

Akira looked up at him with wide, pleading eyes. He didn’t need to write anything to explain when his face said it all.

“Really,” Minato said. There was no way he’d be able to say no, not to that face. And the ache in his heart wouldn’t allow him any other response.

Akira smiled a bit, nodding, then shifted to pay full attention to Minato. Minato shut off his music and turned as well. He looked away, thinking over his words, before starting to explain. Akira drank in each word with rapt attention.

By the end of the afternoon, Akira managed to get a weak whistle about half the time. Minato told him it was a good start. Akira’s pleading expression had him promising to continue the lessons before he could consider saying something to brush him off.

As he walked away from the shrine that evening, a realization hit Minato like a stone falling into a pond. Why his heart ached that whole afternoon. The whole scene was remarkably similar to something he’d experienced years ago, when he was around Akira’s age himself.

At one of the many foster homes he’d lived in, there had been an older girl. He’d heard her whistling once and hadn’t been able to figure out how to do it on his own. But she had offered to teach him. Eventually, she left. He couldn’t even remember why. Had she aged out? Had she been moved somewhere new? He didn’t know. But the whistling had meant so much to him, because one of the few things he could still remember of his dad was him whistling as he walked.

Minato dashed away the tears that threatened to fall. He hadn’t thought about those kinds of things in years. But, this year was already so different. He felt so different already. Maybe he could bring some of that change to Akira.

Chapter Text

Akira didn't like Ikutsuki. He wasn’t bad, as far as he could tell. He didn't shout at Akira, or hurt him, or take away food, like the worst adults did. But he was creepy, and that was enough to meet Akira's very low standards for not trusting this new adult. He also didn't listen--he was one of those adults that thought they didn't actually have to listen to people that couldn't speak.

Someone that didn't want to listen to him shouldn't have wanted him around, either, but Ikutsuki kept acting like he did. He dragged Akira to the high school at least three times a week, and Akira had heard whispers he didn't like, between Ikutsuki and his current guardian, that he might be leaving the foster home soon. He was worried that when that happened, Ikutsuki was going to be his new guardian.

"It'd probably be okay," he signed to Morgana one day, when he managed to sneak out of his usual boring prison of the Gekkoukan staff room. Ikustuki had something else he was supposed to be doing, and there had only been a few of the less interested teachers left in the room with him. None of them had asked questions when Akira put down the biology textbook Ikutsuki had left him with, and eased away, out of the room. Maybe they'd assumed he was going to the bathroom, or to meet up with Ikutsuki, but instead Akira had gone to hide in the little courtyard with the Persimmon tree instead. He was still lying there now, flat on his stomach on the grass, tucked out of sight of any students still hanging around for after school activities. It was hot out so he'd abandoned his jacket on the ground next to him, and he focused for now on trying to talk through his anxiety about Ikutsuki with Morgana.

"I've had worse guardians," he signed. "There won't be other kids around, so he won't try to turn them against me. And he doesn't seem like he wouldn't feed me if I annoy him."

Morgana watched his hands intently, the way he always did when Akira started signing. On good days, Akira liked to pretend that Morgana was really following what Akira was saying. On bad days, he thought that Morgana was probably just interested in the movement.

Morgana butted his head against Akira's arm. Not his hands, he never did that. It's like he knew that his fingers were the only way Akira had to communicate, and that knocking into them would be the same as a person slapping a hand over someone's mouth while they're talking. The warmth of the kitten's body against his made Akira's anxious hands slow down and then stop. He sighed, and stroked Morgana with his free hand--Morgana was half sprawled over his other arm now that Akira has stopped signing on his own, lying on top of his wrist, a reassuring weight anchoring Akira to here and now.

Akira sighed and closed his eyes, letting out a deep, shuddering breath.

He was just... he was so tired. Sometimes he felt old, like a lot older than ten, like he'd been running and fighting and on edge for longer than he'd been alive. He didn't want to have to figure out how to live with Ikutsuki, and whether he'd let Morgana stay, and what kinds of rules he'd have, and whether he'd be any more interested in being able to communicate with Akira when it was just the two of them than he was right now.

"Akira?"

He slid his eyes open to see Jun standing over him, frowning. Akira smiled weakly, fully aware that he'd just been caught somewhere he wasn’t supposed to be.

"Everything okay?" Jun asked.

Akira nodded, and started to sit up, resigned. Jun was a teacher here, he wasn’t going to want Akira wandering around, no matter how understanding he had been before. "Sorry," he signed. “I’ll go back inside.” He reached for his jacket, and couldn't help half glancing up at Jun as he did, reluctantly curious to see if Jun would be paying attention. He'd learned a little bit of sign language, which made him the only person Akira knows of in Iwatodai who could sign at all, other than himself and aide at school and maybe Morgana.

He didn't know whether he was hoping to see Jun paying attention, or hoping they were going to skip right to the part where Jun gave up on trying. But the look on Jun's face wasn't either of those things. It was startled and pale, and he said, "Akira?" for a second time in a voice that barely sounded like his.

Akira cocked his head, exaggerated to show he was listening. He was starting to feel guilty about his mean thought earlier, assuming Jun was going to give up on him when Jun had been one of the good ones so far. And right now, he was looking at Akira like he'd seen a ghost. "Are you okay?" he asked, echoing Jun's question back at him, because he didn't look okay at all.

He was watching Akira's hands though, barely blinking, and he said, "I'm... fine." It answered Akira's question, which was nice. But he sounded like he was lying, which wasn't. "Akira, how long have you had that scar?"

Akira flinched, smiling and ducking his neck away for the half a second it took to process that Jun was looking at his hand, not his neck. It was just that one hurt so much more that Akira's first instinct was to protect it, always, and so it took an extra heartbeat to realize that Jun usually saw him inside with his jacket on, the sleeves a little too big, covering the long swoosh of a scar there.

He shook his head and put his arm behind his back.

"It's just... I think..."

Akira didn't want to talk about it. He hadn't ever talked about it, except once to Goro, and he didn't trust Jun the same way he'd trusted Goro. Instead of listening, he grabbed his jacket, and Morgana, and went running back inside.

—
Jun reached out with one hand after Akira's retreating back, not sure what the point of the movement even was. He wouldn't grab Akira even if he'd moved fast enough to try, but he desperately wanted to hold him here, to talk to him, to tell him that he'd seen that scar before. On the strangest day of his life. In a burning museum, on a sinking airship. A man had pushed a baby into his arms, had called him little Joker, had threatened them both. And that baby had the same scar on his right arm that Jun had just seen on Akira's.

Jun remembered most of it as a blur. He'd tried to forget because none of it made sense, but he'd never been able to forget the fragile look on that baby's face when he looked up at him, or his own desperate need in all that insanity to keep him safe.

The baby had been called Akira too, hadn't he? Jun had forgotten that...

That was nine years ago. When Jun thought back to that day, in his nightmares or when he was awake, he always thought of that baby as a baby. He never wondered what had happened to him, he was just--frozen in Jun's memories, trapped in his nightmares of that day, eternally looking up at him with a fading smile and wide, grey eyes that seemed to beg him for safety.

But time doesn't stand still, and it only ever moves in one direction. Baby Akira wasn't a baby anymore. He'd be nine, ten years old. Just like Akira. Looking up at Jun from under the persimmon tree with eyes that had long since given up on expecting safety from anyone else. It was the same person, the same Akira, and Jun wondered if he might still be able to look at the adults around him and ask for the safety he deserves, if Jun hadn't given him away on that airship nine years ago.

Unbidden, but roaring like fire inside him, like the roaring conflagration of an entire museum going up in flames, a thought occured to Jun.

What if I don't let him go, this time?

—

Akira shrugged on his jacket and ran back inside the school, but inside wasn’t any better. He needed to get away, needed to get somewhere safe. He kept thinking about the way Jun had looked, had sounded, as he asked about his scar, and it made his breath come short. He didn’t want to think about it.

The school was too full of teachers and random students. And Jun could come find him. Akira knew that he was supposed to stay here for several more hours. But Ikutsuki had checked in on him and then said he was heading out.

(His worries about living with Ikutsuki were still just as big and formless, despite his attempts to think it over. Now he just had those worries and the panic from the question about his scar, and he didn’t know how to deal with any of that.)

Since Ikutsuki was out, though, that meant Akira could just… leave. No one would care if he did, hopefully. (Maybe Jun, but he didn’t want to think about Jun right now.)

So he left. He walked out of the school, tugging his sleeves down and ducking his head, his eyes darting everywhere for danger. Once out of school grounds, Morgana popped out of his bag. The feeling of his paws braced on his shoulder helped Akira calm down a little.

It was fine. Jun had just seen the scar. Akira could just tell him he didn’t want to discuss it, and hopefully Jun would listen.

But the shock of it left him shaky still. He didn’t regret leaving. He needed to calm down.

Without thinking about it too hard, he let his feet carry him to the train station, then to the shrine and its playground.

—

Minato had run into Maiko at the shrine that afternoon and decided to spend time playing with her. He didn’t think they were going to have any big conversations that day. Or at least Maiko didn’t seem like she had something to say. Maybe something would come up. But it was nice playing with her.

She was so different from Akira, so much louder. She clearly had affection for him already, and she wasn’t afraid to show it, to tug him from one game to the next. When she was sad, she showed it clearly, willing to talk all about whatever upset her. Akira was happy to just play in tandem, although he had a few willful flashes so far. He was so buttoned in, so guarded. Usually, people were happy to tell Minato their problems with little to no prompting.

Maybe he should ask? Ask about Akira’s trips to the high school, ask how his foster home was. The idea felt uncomfortable, but Minato couldn’t tell why. Would Akira pull away from those questions? Or was it because Minato was still unsure of how to interact with people, how to care about them?

Movement caught his eye near the entrance to the shrine. As if summoned by his thoughts, Akira walked up the steps, his head drooped and his shoulders hunched. Morgana poked out of his bag with his paws propped on Akira’s shoulder.

Maiko noticed them too and gave a big wave. “Hi!!” she called. “Wanna come play with us?”

Akira paused, gripping the straps of his backpack, but Minato couldn’t get a good read on his expression from so far away. So he walked over. Maiko hopped off the end of the slide and trailed behind him.

“Hey, Akira, this is Maiko,” he said, introducing the two.

Maiko gave a smile and chirped out, “We’ve met before.”

Akira nodded in agreement, although he shrank in place.

Minato tried to figure out what to say next, but Maiko showed a moment of surprising emotional intelligence. She looked between the two, her smile falling, before returning a little gentler. “Actually, I should head home. But you two should play still! I’ll play with you later, Akira!”

She started to pass Akira, then turned to face him. “Minato’s a really good listener if you feel sad,” she whispered, loud enough for Minato to hear her clearly. Then she scampered off with another wave and a shouted goodbye.

Which left Minato and Akira, staring at each other in silence for long moments. Minato did his best to project good listener or whatever it was about him that made people willing to share their troubles with him. Akira just ducked his head and fidgeted, pulling down his sleeves. His cat peered at Minato over his shoulder.

Finally, Minato spoke up. “Do you want to talk? Or write, I guess. We could just practice whistling if not.”

Relief spread across Akira’s expression as he grabbed his notebook and scribbled Whistling.

And so that’s what they did. They sat down on the bench and practiced. And it went well. It helped Akira calm down from whatever had upset him.

But Minato itched to help him sort out his feelings. He was getting good at that. So, as the lesson came to a close, he tried to approach the matter from a different angle. “So you didn’t have to go to the high school today?” he asked.

Akira tensed, then shrugged. He seemed to think for a moment, before writing: I left early.

“Any problems with the teachers or anyone? I could try to help out.” He kept thinking about Mr. Ekoda and how he’d hidden Fuuka’s disappearance.

Another shrug. Akira wrote slower this time, crossing things out several times. The message he shared had several bits crossed out too well to read what they were originally, but the message that came through read Mr. Kashihara asked about something private. I didn’t want to talk, so I ran away.

Minato felt his heart thud in his chest with sudden fear. What did he mean, something private? His mind skittered to all the worst places, before he noticed the way Akira kept tugging at his jacket sleeve.

Come to think of it, he’d never seen Akira without long sleeves, despite the growing heat of summer. That raised further worries, of course, of what he might be hiding under there, but it pointed away from the place Minato’s mind had initially gone. So a different kind of worried, but still huge worries.

“Is it something under your sleeves?” he asked, unable to keep a small desperate edge out of his voice.

And Akira froze, his expression twitching into a tense smile. He snatched up his paper and pen and got to his feet, backing away.

“Wait, you don’t need to talk about it, I’m sorry-” Minato called out, getting to his feet, a hand outstretched. Something in his chest felt tight.

Akira just shook his head, that polite smile on his face, before giving a brief wave, turning around, and running away. The last thing he heard was a meow from Morgana.

In his chest, where his bonds lived, he felt Hope strengthen, then… sour. Crack. It knocked the wind out of him, the feeling like he had broken something.

He stared at the entrance to the shrine for long minutes, waiting and hoping Akira would come back. But he didn’t. So, eventually, Minato headed home, his mind caught up on how he could fix things with Akira.

After that, the feeling of whatever had happened to Minato’s bond with Akira sat in his chest, always tugging at him just to the point of discomfort. Until some moment towards the end of school the next day when, apropos of absolutely nothing, the bond seemed to right itself, or fix itself. It was confusing and a little distressing, and he didn’t know what that meant for how things would be the next time he saw Akira.

Minato saw Akira two days later, at the shrine, as if nothing had changed. Akira gave him a tired smile, so Minato walked up. “Sorry about pushing the other day,” he said immediately.

Akira shrugged, before writing Morgana convinced me to try again.

Surprised, Minato met the cat’s eyes. “Uh… thanks,” he told the cat. Morgana almost seemed smug in return.

Akira shifted in place for a moment. Minato was about to suggest they just practice whistling, when he started to write again. I figure you were worried last time. I’m okay. There’s an old mark on my arm that I don’t want to talk about.

Relief rushed through him. It seemed like Akira realized that Minato had been making some concerning guesses. It was relieving to know that he wasn’t hiding current bruises or wounds, from himself or others. He didn’t know what Akira meant by “mark,” but he didn’t have to know. He didn’t want to break things between them again.

“Thanks for telling me,” he said. “I’m glad you’re alright, and I won’t ask about it anymore.”

Akira relaxed a little at his response, then whistled a little tune.

Minato let the distraction work, smiling a bit. “Sounds like you’ve been practicing. Let’s see how you’re doing. Then, I can start showing you the trick to whistle really loud.”

Akira gave a little grin soaked in mischief, and they settled on the bench to practice and start new lessons.

It was going well. But Minato still felt uneasy. It was so different, to have to shy away from talking about problems like this. Usually, people were happy to have someone to listen. But Akira shied away from the idea of interest in his deeper problems. How was he supposed to help Akira if Akira wasn’t willing to share?

The pair said their goodbyes after Akira had started to make progress on whistling louder, and Akira seemed happy, but, even as their bond grew one step stronger, it still felt shivery and thin. Minato hadn’t noticed it until it had turned discordant earlier that week but, once the bond righted itself, Minato had realized how fragile it felt, more fragile than any of his other bonds.

—

After parting ways with Akira for the day, Minato couldn’t stop thinking about their bond, going over what he knew. The previous time they’d met, there had been that feeling like the bond was somehow going wrong. If he had to describe it, it was like a rope that had become frayed, or maybe a melody that had grown discordant. Minato had worried about that. Had he done something wrong? How was he supposed to fix it?

But then it turned out the bond seemed to fix itself. The next time he met Akira, their bond seemed the same as ever, becoming harmonious again as they got to know each other better.

It didn’t make any sense to Minato. And there was only one place he could go to ask about any of this. So before heading back to the dorm, he stopped by the Velvet Room.

Minato was greeted by Igor’s usual call of, “Welcome to the Velvet Room.”

Elizabeth added, “How can we assist you today?”

A little hesitantly, Minato said, “Well, it’s about social links…”

“Ah, yes,” Elizabeth interrupted, flipping through her book. “You are making excellent progress on deepening your bonds with others.”

But Minato shook his head and answered, “That’s the thing. One of the bonds isn’t doing so great. Last time, it…” Then he trailed off, not sure if the way it felt to him would make sense to anyone else.

But Igor just nodded knowingly and said, “Ah, yes. You are referring to the social link that reversed.”

Minato looked up at Igor sharply, and his obvious interest prompted Igor to continue. “Social links are the manifestation of your bonds with others. Bonds naturally form between people as they grow to understand each other.” With a snap of Igor’s fingers, a card appeared, floating in the air where Minato could see. The card depicted Hope, the Arcana of the bond Minato had with Akira.

“However,” Igor continued, “the nature of bonds can change over time. If a bond weakens, the social link can reverse.” Igor waved his hand, causing the card to spin until it was upside-down.

Just looking at it gave Minato that weird discordant feeling again. “So that’s what happened,” he murmured.

Igor nodded, then added, “Fortunately, a reversed social link can be mended. If you take care to nurture that bond, you may soon find your social link restored.” He waved his hand again, and the card turned back upright. The strange feeling disappeared as if it had never been.

So that gave Minato part of the answer to what happened. But the explanation didn’t line up with what he’d felt, so he pointed out, “But that’s not what happened. My bond with Akira seemed to reverse for no reason, then fixed itself. But even now it still feels different from all my other bonds. It’s like…” How to explain it? After considering a moment, he tried, “...Fragile, almost. Like one wrong touch and it could crack again.”

“Ah, yes,” Igor said. Although he continued to wear the same grin as ever, his expression seemed faintly weary as he continued, “That child is…an unusual case.” He folded his hands before him, causing the floating card to disappear. Then he sat pensively for a moment before finally explaining.

“As I said before, bonds naturally form between people. It is a part of human nature. Yet if a person’s bonds are repeatedly tested, strained, and broken, they may find it harder to form new bonds in the future.”

Then Igor fell silent and just watched Minato. It seemed that was all the explanation he was going to get. But he’d gotten used to Igor not giving direct answers to anything, so he sat back and considered the information for a moment.

Presumably, Igor was talking about Akira. So Akira’s bonds with people kept getting broken, and he had trouble forming more? Well, for most people, bonds with others didn’t have a supernatural element. They just meant things like friendship and family. Which could mean that Akira’s friends and family kept breaking his trust. Or maybe, since he was an orphaned foster kid, he never had much of a chance to form bonds in the first place.

Minato knew what that was like. Getting tossed around between uncaring foster homes and distant relatives meant he’d never stayed in one place long enough to really get to know anyone. Even when he did manage to make a friend or two, they’d never last. Sure, other kids would say they’d stay in touch after he moved, or repeat corny lines from children’s shows like “we’ll always be friends, no matter how far we’re apart,” but they didn’t follow through. As soon as he moved, he never heard from them again. He was left alone, as always.

Eventually he just stopped trying to get to know anyone because he knew that would happen. Why bother making friends when they would forget him as soon as he was out of sight? What was the point of family when they just saw him as a burden to house and feed just until they could pass him off to someone else?

That was how he used to feel. Until he got to Iwatodai. Somehow he’d met so many people who gradually became important to him. Not just for the sake of fighting Shadows together, or making his Personas stronger. Because he actually cared about them as people, and he could see they cared about him too.

Quietly, Minato said, “I get it. This year I’ve been learning how hard it is to live without trusting anyone. How much it hurts to push everyone away. How precious it is to form connections with people.” Looking up at the spot where the card had been floating, he declared, “I want to help Akira realize that, even just a little bit.”

Igor’s grin seemed warmer than usual as he cautioned, “This bond will require more patience than most.”

Minato just nodded. “That’s fine. It’s worth it. And I want him to know that he’s worth it.”

Igor seemed positively delighted as he replied, “How wonderful. I am sure that child will benefit greatly from your assistance.”

It wasn’t until Minato was on his way back to the dorm that he realized Igor seemed just a little too interested in Akira in particular. He’d never shown any interest in the specific people Minato had social links with, just the presence of the link in general. He wondered what was different about Akira. But after thinking about it for a while, he decided Igor wouldn’t tell him anything if he asked. It would have to stay a mystery.

Besides, whatever Igor thought of Akira didn’t change Minato’s mind. He was determined to help Akira start to connect with people. He just needed to figure out how.

Chapter Text

The weekend after Akira’s bond had reversed and fixed itself, Minato settled down for a day of gaming with Iris. After a little while slicing their way through demons, Iris started up a conversation in a more serious tone than usual. Instead of discussing where they should go next in the game, she asked for help with something.

Joker: Hey Shion?. There’s something I wanted to ask you about.
Shion: Hit me.
Joker: Well, it has to do with my real life. I’m in a weird situation right now, and I don’t know what I should do. There’s no one in my life I could talk to about this, so I figured you might be a good person to ask, since you aren’t involved. Are you okay with this?
Shion: Yeah, it’s fine. I’m a good listener.
Joker: Okay. Well, first of all, I should tell you something. I’m actually a man, not a woman. I just like playing female avatars online. I guess it’s because I used to crossdress, but I can’t anymore because of my job, so this is the next best thing.
Joker: I understand if that weirds you out…
Shion: Nah, it’s cool. I don’t care.
Joker: I’m glad to hear that, Shion.
Joker: So, the situation I’m in. There’s this boy my boss keeps bringing around. He’s got a disability, but he’s very smart. I’ve been talking to him a lot, since my boss tends to just leave him alone.
Joker: Recently, I noticed an old scar he had, and I realized that I met him once as a baby. It’s… complicated. I got pushed into taking care of him for an hour or two during a crisis. Then, I let someone else take care of him. Now, he’s in foster care and it seems like he’s lost a lot of hope that people might treat him well. And… I keep thinking, what if I fostered him, or even adopted him? What if I gave him someone who’d always be there for him?
Joker: Something about him makes me want to hold onto him and protect him. I don’t know what that is, or why I feel this way.
Joker: But I’m a single man, and I only have a teacher’s salary. I’m fairly young, and I feel like everyone will assume that I wouldn’t be able to take care of him. They might even be right to think so.
Joker: But I still want to take care of this kid. No one else is doing it. My boss just sits him down in a corner with a textbook then leaves. Is this crazy? Should I go for this?

Minato read and reread Iris’s words, his eyes narrowing. That kid… that had to be Akira, right? As for Iris… he was a teacher, who lived in Tatsumi Port Island. He liked flower language. He was new to the city as of this year. If his boss kept bringing Akira around, then he definitely worked at Gekkoukan.

There was only one person this could be, right? Mr. Kashihara, his homeroom and composition teacher, who was new to the school and always wore a flower pinned to his breast.

What should he do? Mr. Kashihara, or Iris, had opened up to him about this because he wasn’t involved, but he knew Akira. He spent time with the boy, and with his cat. And he knew just how fragile relationships with the boy could be.

He decided not to reveal who he was, not yet. But, knowing Akira, and knowing how he himself had grown up… He thought he knew what advice to give.

Shion: It sounds like that kid needs someone to look out for him. Even if you’re not the best choice you’re better than nobody.
Shion: But if he’s given up hope, it’ll be a struggle to get him to trust you. You’ve got to keep trying, even if he pulls away.

There was a long break before Iris/Mr. Kashihara responded.

Joker: Okay. Thanks, Shion. I’ll still have to keep thinking about this.
Joker: I don’t think I can play today. I won’t be able to focus. I’ll catch up with you more another day.
Joker: Bye!

Minato watched as his avatar disappeared, before moving to log out himself. He pushed aside the idea of talking to Mr. Kashihara in person. He could just keep talking to Iris in the game. It would be simpler.

But Minato’s plan to stick to talking to “Iris” online didn’t work. Or, more accurately, he couldn’t stick with it. Over the next couple weeks, every time Minato logged on to Innocent Sin Online, either Iris wasn’t there, or they were distracted and left quickly. They didn’t really talk much, and when they did it was banal. It felt like a step backwards. But he could feel the hum of their connection in his chest. It hadn’t reversed, not like with Akira. It was fine. It was just… stalling.

It only took Minato 2 weeks to finally give in. Mr. Kashihara was too distracted by real life to really engage with him online. If he wanted to keep helping him, he had to try something new.

He did consider just letting it lie. There were plenty of other people he could spend time with. In truth, he knew very little about Mr. Kashihara, despite how much they had played together. Plus, it was nearly time for final exams, and he should be focused on studying.

But he kept thinking about Akira. The boy reminded him far too much of himself. Resignation hung heavy around him. Usually, Minato was able to help his bonds move past that sort of thing, even if things got worse before they got better, but Akira was different. He’d had a few more whistling lessons with the boy since the bond had reversed, and, while things were progressing, Akira still barely opened up to him. Without opening up, Minato didn’t know how to help.

He deserved better than what he’d been handed. And Mr. Kashihara might be able to give it to him. (And maybe this was how Minato could finally help).

So, on a certain Monday, Minato sought out his homeroom teacher.

“Ah, Arisato, did you need something?” Mr. Kashihara asked with a kind, if distracted, smile. His arms were full of papers and books.

Minato steeled himself. How was this scarier than fighting Shadows?

“I’m Shion. On Innocent Sin Online,” he finally said.

Mr. Kashihara’s eyes narrowed, then widened in shock. His cheeks flushed. “Oh! Um… I suppose we should discuss this. Let’s find an empty classroom.”

Once they’d found somewhere quiet, Mr. Kashihara set down his papers and sat at one of the desks. “Feel free to sit down,” he said with a strained smile. Minato sat at the desk next to him. Mr. Kashihara continued “I think I owe you an apology. I didn’t know it was you who I was playing with, but as we’ve played, I’ve treated you in an overly familiar way, and burdened you with listening to my problems. That’s not an appropriate way to treat your students.” He gave a seated bow.

But Minato shook his head, even as he fumbled for the words he wanted to say. He couldn’t just sit back here and let things progress. If he wanted things to turn out alright, he had to act.

“That’s not why I approached you. I don’t care how you act online. It’s supposed to be anonymous. But… a couple weeks ago, you were talking about a kid in foster care, right?”

Mr. Kashihara nodded carefully.

“That’s Akira Kurusu, right? I know him. Are you still planning to try to adopt him?” Minato fiddled with his headphones, unable to meet his teacher’s eyes.

Mr. Kashihara sucked in a breath between his teeth. A glance showed he was looking away too. “I… I’d like to, but…”

Minato forced himself to raise his head and put his hands flat on the desk. “I want to help you. I’ve been spending time with him. He’s… He’s got a lot of issues. You’ll need help getting him to trust you. He’ll probably push you away for no reason sometimes.”

Mr. Kashihara looked back at him, but his eyes were distant, somewhere else. “You really care about him, don’t you?”

Minato bit the inside of his cheek, but nodded.

Mr. Kashihara was silent for a long moment, before he smiled. “Thank you, Arisato. I think I’ll take you up on that. And… only if you’re okay with it, I would like to keep playing that game with you.”

Minato felt a knot in his chest loosen. Suddenly he could breathe better. He smiled a little, ducking his head. “Alright, Iris,” he said.

Mr. Kashihara grinned. Then he sighed. “I should probably tell you a little more about me. I told you I met Akira as a baby.”

Minato nodded.

“Did you ever look into the Sumaru City Crisis in 1999?”

Minato nodded again, dread beginning to pool in his gut. “There was a serial killer, and then a cult, and some sort of mass hysteria.”

Mr. Kashihara nodded, then began his story in earnest. “I grew up in Sumaru City. I was 17 during the Crisis.

“The serial killer Joker died after setting fire to the aerospace museum. I was at the museum at the time. I had gotten a letter asking to come meet someone. It turns out it had been sent by Joker. He threatened me. And he had Akira with him. He made me hold Akira, and he said all sorts of crazy things about me, and about the baby.

“Some people came to save me. Joker ended up dying, and we escaped the burning building via a blimp that could fly in case of emergencies.”

Mr. Kashihara’s expression was distant as he fiddled with the flower at his breast. “I don’t think about it much, because it was mostly just extremely confusing. I handed off Akira to someone who said they knew him and would make sure he was safe. But I guess they couldn’t keep him safe, since he ended up in foster care.”

He shook his head as if to rid himself of the thought. “I don’t know why some part of me wants so badly to keep Akira safe. I felt it even before I realized we had met before. But you were right. He needs somebody, and I seem to be the only one willing to step up. It’s better than nothing.”

Mr. Kashihara nodded to himself, before offering Minato a smile. “I’m going to do my best to take care of Akira. Any help or advice you can give will be very welcome.”

MInato nodded. “I’ll give you what advice I can,” he said, even as he felt warmth grow in his chest. This was the right thing to do.

Chapter Text

Jun has not been able to squash down the fierce, protective feeling that he'd first felt for Akira on the day they'd met. It's ebbed and flowed since then, and at some points Jun has almost been able to convince himself that he doesn't feel it. 

He tells himself he feels bad for Akira--a quiet kid with no family who struggles to find reasons to want to communicate--and nothing more. He's tried hard to convince himself that it's none of his business what happens to Akira. That Akira is probably a lot better off than a lot of other children in his situation, because Ikutsuki has taken an interest in him, and that might lead to better opportunities for him in the future.

But these moments are rare and fleeting, because much more of Jun's time is consumed by a feeling of possessive need to keep Akira close to him. To be able to look over and know that he's okay. To keep some promise that he seems to have made to Akira without his brain having any say in it.

Jun picks up a JSL book and starts teaching himself fingerspelling and a few odd words, because it never hurts to learn new things. He rearranges his schedule to have more free time after classes, so that he won't have to spend as much time on grading and planning when Akira is there, because someone needs to be responsible for him while he's there. 

...He takes off from work one day to have a consultation with a family attorney about what to expect if he wanted to adopt a child. And there's really no good, logical explanation for that.

Ikutsuki has warned him against making any rash decisions regarding Akira. He's hinted vaguely that he has plans for Akira in the future, but the way he'd said it when Jun sat down to talk to him had been so horribly unclear that Jun really isn't sure what those plans are. Is it limited to Akira's schooling? Or is he planning to take a more personal interest at some point?

(He hasn't so far)

(Akira deserves better)

But the overall point is that Jun has learned it is in fact possible for him to adopt. Difficult, maybe, because the ideal adoptive family, to the officials involved, would include a married, heterosexual couple, able and willing to support the adopted child through to adulthood. Jun is neither married nor heterosexual, but he is so eager to be Akira's support system that it scares him a little. And he has to believe that counts for something.

The legal system is not exactly in favor of him adopting Akira, but it's also not totally against it. Ikutsuki has offered vague warnings, but Jun doesn't think he actually has the authority to say anything against it, especially since his own interest in Akira has stopped at leaving Akira in the Gekkoukan staff room after school. Which means the only remaining opinion Jun doesn't know is Akira's, and that's the one that really matters most.

So Jun makes a point of giving himself a free afternoon after class one day. Akira's there, of course, bored and squirming on the chair in the corner that he's always exiled to. Jun is still trying to figure out how to get his attention when Akira looks up at him with eyes that say please help me.

"Akira," he says. "Can you come help me move some boxes out of my classroom?"

The words are barely out of his mouth when Akira is off his chair and nodding, the textbook he'd been saddled with abandoned on the seat behind him. Jun casts a glance back at it and has to resist the urge to shake his head when he recognizes the first year civics textbook, open to a chapter on the national legal system. Jun's first few meetings with Akira, when he'd used various texts to assess his reading level, had been enough to tell him that this is exactly the kind of reading Akira would find unbearably boring. It's no wonder he'd wanted out.

(It is, however, a nice surprise to see that he's the one Akira had chosen to look toward for that help)

(That he'd been trusted, even with something that's probably inconsequential, in the grand scheme of things)

He takes Akira to his homeroom classroom on the first floor, where there are a few boxes of old textbooks that need to be moved to a storage closet, and then when they've finished that he offers to treat Akira to something from the school store.

"You don't have to," Akira says, signing very slowly. Jun has seen him move much faster in conversations before, so he thinks the speed is probably more out of reluctance than it is so he can follow.

"I know I don't have to," he says. "But it would have taken me longer to move everything by myself, and you didn't have to help me, either."

A quick flash of a grin, and Akira says, "I was bored."

"I could tell," Jun says, returning his smile. It's rare to see such an honest expression on Akira's face, but Jun is starting to learn which smiles he means and which ones he doesn't. This one, he thinks, is real.

The school store is just closing up at the end of the day, but they get there in time for Akira (with the serious consideration of a child that doesn't get to choose his own food very often) to pick out a snack for himself. Jun suggests they go out to sit by the persimmon tree instead of back into the staff room, and Akira doesn't complain. He wedges himself into a corner with his back to two walls, and shares a corner of his food with Morgana before digging into the rest himself.

"Are cats supposed to eat human food?" Jun asks. Akira nods, completely unconcerned, and Jun supposes he probably knows by now what Morgana is able to eat and what he isn't. Still, it's a little concerning to see the kitten nibbling away on his portion, and Jun has to force himself to focus on Akira instead. He's here for a specific reason, and Akira is looking more at ease now than Jun has seen him for a while. It feels like the right moment if there's ever going to be one, so Jun sits down on the grass in front of him and opens his mouth. "Akira--"

"Did you know they're going to cut the tree down?"

Jun blinks, thrown by Akira's stab at starting a conversation. He glances over his shoulder at the persimmon tree, then looks back at Akira and nods. "They're going to be doing some construction around it," he explains.

Akira studies the tree for several seconds while his hands are busy with his food, then he puts that down and says, "I'm happy I'm here this year. I like the tree better than--" a word that Jun assumes is probably construction.

"Well," Jun says carefully. "What if you were still here next year?"

Akira shakes his head no. "I always get moved," he explains. 

Jun's heart starts beating faster, and he feels suddenly nervous. Is this what people feel like when they propose, he wonders? In a way, it's kind of the same thing. He's asking someone to become a part of his family, and he doesn't know what Akira's reaction is going to be. "But what if you moved in with me?"

Akira stares at him blankly. He doesn't show any reaction at all, just a complete lack of comprehension that does nothing to help Jun's nerves.

"I've been doing some research," Jun says. "And if the paperwork goes alright, you can come and stay with me instead of going to another foster home."

Akira raises his hands, hesitates, lowers them again, then starts over and just signs, "Why?"

"Because I want you to have--" a home, a family, me. "Somewhere safe and permanent to live."

"For how long?"

"Well," Jun says, with a forced chuckle. "I guess most people move out as adults."

Akira's expression is still confused, his eyebrows very slowly inching together as his brow furrows with the effort of trying to understand. After a very long, agonizing wait, Morgana headbutts Akira's hand, and this seems to have the same effect on him as a reboot might on a computer. Akira blinks, and looks around for what Jun guesses must be his notebook. When it's nowhere nearby--back in the staff room, probably--he clicks his tongue impatiently and starts to sign slowly, with frequent breaks into fingerspelling.

"I'm not a baby," he signs first.

Then, "Nobody wants older kids."

And, "I'm too much trouble and my brain is hurt and I can't even talk."

"Akira," Jun says, before Akira's hands can twitch into another anxious, horrible reason why nobody should want him. "There's absolutely nothing you can tell me that would make me want you less."

Akira shrugs his shoulders, expression completely helpless, still lost, and signs, "Why?" again with a hopeless incomprehension that breaks Jun's heart a little.

"Because you're you," he says. "And that's all I need to know. Now, do you want to come live with me? That's the most important thing."

"I want to stay with Morgana," Akira says, after a pause, completely sidestepping the question.

Jun addresses this anyway. "He's more than welcome too, of course," he says. "I wouldn't dream of separating you."

This is the only thing he's said so far that seems to actually reassure Akira. A little tension leaves him, and he sighs.

"Think about it," Jun says. "Okay? I'm going to start the paperwork process, but if you decide you don't want to come live with me, just tell me and I'll stop it."

Akira hesitates. He's smiling slightly, but it isn't a real smile, and his eyes are distant and worried. He nods, but then says, "It won't work."

"It will," Jun says. "If you're okay with it. Because I'm going to fight for you, Akira."

And this shocks Akira's hands into stillness, his eyes going wide at the declaration. He doesn't say anything else for the rest of the time they spend next to the persimmon tree, but when Jun decides they probably need to go back into the staffroom, he's pretty sure he catches Akira hastily wiping his eyes with his shirt sleeve when he thinks Jun isn't looking. It's a quick, half hidden movement, and Jun pretends not to have seen. Instead, as they walk back inside, he puts his hand on Akira's shoulder, just for a second, and gives it a quick, reassuring little squeeze. 

If he can't convince Akira with words that he means this, then he'll just have to show him.

Chapter Text

Jun takes a long time to figure out how, or even if, he's going to tell Akira that he'd once met him as a baby. He doesn't know if it's a good idea to tell him that they'd met on a burning airship in Sumaru, and that Akira had very clearly been in danger at the time. Jun's sure that he will have heard the story a hundred times growing up, that it will have been noted and highlighted in whatever file follows him from foster care to foster care. Probably it's even the reason he's here in Iwatodai instead of back in Sumaru--someone had looked at that and decided it's better to keep him far away from the source of his trauma.

So maybe it won't be a good idea to bring that up to Akira. He might not want to be reminded of something that had almost killed him when he was too young to remember it. He might think Jun is just making it all up anyway. It might just be weird, and it's not like it's going to make a big difference to Akira.

But it would mean so much to Jun . He has questions. He's hungry, now that he understands who Akira is, for answers. He wants to know if... if he'd done the right thing back then. Handing Akira over to people he didn't even... well, he hadn't--they had been strangers, he reminds himself. 

It had just felt like those people had stuck so firmly in his memory. Jun can still close his eyes and remember the little girl, Justine, who had promised to take care of him. He can remember how wrong it had felt when Tatsuya walked away without taking the lighter Jun had offered him, and the feeling of incompleteness when Jun had been left with it.

I have nothing to give back in return.

In the decade since, Jun has imagined a hundred answers he wishes he'd given, but none that he ever could have, because all of his answers boil down to some variation of it's already yours, and that makes no sense . Jun can't shake the feeling, somehow, that he's only holding onto it for Tatsuya. It had been his father's lighter, and then it had in some incomprehensible way become Tatsuya's , not Jun's, and so it feels wrong now that he's the one carrying it. 

He's never talked to anyone about that day, because who would believe him? Who would want to listen? Jun has so many important, complicated feelings that he doesn't understand tied up in what happened back then and that's another reason he's not sure how he should talk to Akira about it. The last thing he wants is to burden a nine year old with things he doesn't know how to even think about himself.

In the end, it's selfish when he decides to talk to Akira about it. He waits until an afternoon when they're the only ones in the staff room--Ikustuki, once again, is nowhere to be found--and then says as casually as possible, "I realized recently that I met you back when you were a baby?"

Akira looks up from today's textbook, Japanese history, with an expression that says I would rather be thinking about anything else , and Jun hides a smile. He's seen that on so many students faces during exam time, after all. But then the smile fades, because Akira isn't one of his students. Akira really shouldn't be studying this material so young, even if he's technically capable of it.

"I realized when I saw that scar on your arm," Jun explains, keeping his voice as light as possible because he remembers how Akira had reacted last time he said anything about it.

Sure enough, Akira's expression slams closed, guarded and wary, and his body language changes too. He shifts backward, and for a second Jun thinks he's either going to run or just hide inside his textbook again. But Morgana , who had been snoozing on Akira's shoulder, is now staring at Jun with what looks like almost intelligent interest, and Akira turns his head to look at him before looking reluctantly back at Jun. And Jun isn't sure why the cat is so suddenly interested in him, but he'll take whatever he can get. Akira, from what he's seen, trusts his cat the way other kids his age trust their parents or their friends. So when Morgana seems to care about what Jun's about to say, Akira begrudgingly listens.

"It was only once," Jun says. "At the museum."

Akira signs a word Jun hasn't learned yet, and then when he starts to say, "I'm sorry--" he spells it out instead. "M-U-S-E-U-M?"

"Yes," Jun says. "At the museum."

Akira frowns, and at least Jun knows the sign this time when Akira asks, "What museum?"

"The airspace museum."

Akira continues to stare at him blankly, and Jun starts to feel a little uncomfortable. "I don't know how it was explained to you," he says. "But I mean the airship."

Akira starts, and starts to sign something before catching himself and spelling it. "A-I-R-S-H-I-P?"

This time, it's Jun that stares at Akira for several seconds. Then he asks, gently, "Akira, were you told about JOKER?"

Morgana mewls, high and loud and apparently distressed, but Akira shakes his head and cocks it ever so slightly to one side, curious but still wary. Then he pushes himself off his chair, brings his textbook over to Jun's desk, and borrows a pencil to write on one of the blank pages at the back. Jun winces but doesn't argue. Instead he waits while Akira scribbles something out.

I don't know who Joker is. What airship were you on? Airship museum? I know I got kidnapped or something but I don't know who did it or why? They got my parents too I think but I don't know.

He shoves the textbook at Jun and looks away, expression complicated. Jun takes his time reading it two or three times, his heartrate slowly going up as he realizes he's going to have to be the one to explain. That no one had , after all, taken the time to tell Akira his own story. "Well," he says at last. "About ten years ago, there was a serial killer active in Sumaru. His name was JOKER. Or--I suppose that wasn't his name, but that's what he was called." Jun has known this story since he was a teenager, but he's always felt... a little sad, talking about it. Him. JOKER. Not for his victims, although of course he feels sadness and sympathy for them as well.

JOKER makes him feel like he's lost something. Akira is the closest he's come to ever feel like he's claiming something back .

"One day," Jun continues. "He set a museum on fire. I was there." He doesn't go into how or why. Akira doesn't need to know what Jun had been through that day, or how it has haunted him since--

( I have nothing to give back in return )

--he only needs to know what had happened to him. So Jun brushes past his own part of the story, and says, "JOKER gave you to me to hold. I don't know why, he was rambling about... all kinds of insane things. That's when I saw your scar."

Akira's looking at him again now, frowning and rubbing absently at his scarred arm with his other hand.

Jun continues. "Everyone there managed to get up to the roof, which was a working airship. I don't think it was supposed to be functional, so I suppose we were lucky. That's how we got out." 

Morgana mews, and buts his head up against the side of Akira's. It seems to pull Akira out of whatever unhappy place his thoughts are taking him, but it also reminds Jun that there had been a kitten on the airship, too. Not Morgana, or not this Morgana, obviously, because that kitten would be a fully grown cat by now. But maybe a parent to the one Akira carries with him everywhere now? Either that, or some strange coincidence.

"I didn't know that," he signs, slow enough for Jun to catch it.

"I'm sorry I thought you did," he says. 

"You really knew me when I was a baby?"

"Only very briefly," Jun says. "But after all that, I'm happy to see that you're doing alright now."

Akira laughs, startling Jun. Sometimes he forgets that he can still make sounds, he just... can't speak. "I'm not okay," he signs. "They have a whole list of things that are wrong with me in foster care."

"You're alive," Jun says. "You're here. You're in one piece. You have the most loyal cat I've ever seen--"

A brief, genuine smile.

"You're smart," Jun continues. "And I don't mean all this." He taps the textbook Akira had scribbled in. "I mean the way you watch people, the way you adapt yourself to new situations." Mostly to find trouble or to avoid hurt, as far as Jun has seen, which are both very sad things for Akira to have needed to learn so young, but that doesn't mean he's not smart, and quick, for being able to learn them. "And it's okay if you're not okay, but..." He smiles slightly. "I'm still very happy to see you here, and know you made it out of a burning airship."

Akira thinks about that for a long few minutes. Then he signs one of the first signs Jun had learned, and says, " Thank you."

"I'm not saying anything that isn't true," Jun says.

"Thank you," Akira signs again, more insistent.

"You're welcome," Jun says. "And I don't know everything about what happened with JOKER. I don't even know how you got that scar, but if you ever have questions I am able to answer, I'd be happy to do that."

Akira nods. Hesitantly, he spells out “J-O-K-E-R?”

Jun nods, waiting to see where this is going to go.

“He hurt me?”

For a second, they both look at Akira's scar. Then Jun nods at him. “Yes,” he says. “I don't know how long he had you, but I know he hurt you.”

Akira’s shoulders sag. Very slowly, his hands held lower than usual, he starts to say, “It's just…. For a second when you said the name, I felt--”

And then the door opens, and quick as a flash, Akira snatches his textbook off Jun's desk and darts back to his seat, burying his nose in a random page as Ikutsuki comes to retrieve him, pretending he'd been working his way through the thick book the entire time.

Chapter Text

Akira has not been to a summer festival since the year he won Featherman masks for him and Goro to play with. By the time the next year rolled around, they’d already been separated, and Akira had decided he was probably too old for festivals. That was the best explanation he could come up with for why he didn’t feel excited at the time, and it’s only as he grows up that he starts to realize… no, he just misses Goro. It’s no fun going places like that by himself.

He’s not expecting to go this year, either, and when Jun asks about his plans the day before, that’s what he tells him.

“Are you sure?” Jun asks. “I hear it’s going to be good weather for fireworks.”

Akira nods his head yes, he’s sure, and assumes that Jun will let it go. For a few seconds, it seems like he will. Then Jun says, “That’s too bad. I’ve been trying to find someone to go with me.”

Akira doesn’t really want to ignore him, so he reluctantly looks up again, and asks, “Go with your friends?”

“I haven’t been in Iwatodai that long,” Jun explains. “And I don’t have any friends here that I would want to go to a festival with.”

Akira touches his chest, and makes a high noise somewhere in the back of his throat, cocking his head a little to one side. He doesn’t really expect Jun to understand the sound, because no one except Morgana has made the effort to learn, but Jun gets the message anyway.

“Why not you?” he asks. “Neither of us has anyone else, right? And I know I’d be sad to miss it, so you’d be doing me a favor.”

Akira chews on this. He hasn’t been to a summer festival since the one with Goro, and when was the last time he saw fireworks ? That might be cool. And he’d be helping Jun, which would maybe make up for all the effort Jun’s put into learning sign. At least a little. Hesitantly, Akira nods. Jun beams like Akira’s just made his whole day, and Akira leans back a little, startled by that reaction.

“Do you need me to come to your foster home to pick you up?” Jun asks, and Akira shakes his head no immediately. It’ll be much easier if he just sneaks out than if Jun tried to explain. 

“Meet you there,” he says.

And so, the next day he props open a window in the kitchen after dinner, loiters around until everyone else is busy, then darts back and sneaks out. There’s too many people around to risk the louder front or back doors, but the window is quiet, and no one hears or sees him go. The rush of a successful escape cheers Akira up as he runs, and he half-consciously purrs at Morgana until he starts to run out of breath, and has to stop purring and slow down in his run. But he’s still smiling, and he’s starting to think that maybe the festival won’t be that bad even before he gets to the entrance and finds Jun there waiting for him.

They start at the games, even though Akira is self conscious about his poor performance, he has to admit that he’s not doing as bad as he was the last time he came to a festival. When he won those masks for him and Goro, he’d been shocked and surprised that his hands could do something well enough to win, but he’s older now than he had been then. He still gets frustrated a lot by his hands when they won’t do things he wants, won’t move as well or quickly as other peoples’ do. 

But he’s spent years slowly writing messages for people that won’t listen to any other way he tries to talk to them. Years signing, and playing with Morgana, and snatching candy bars and snacks off shelves at convenience stores. This year alone, he’s signed so much , because Jun had given him someone to talk to, and he isn’t ever satisfied with the simple answers Akira pushes other people away with--Jun wants to actually talk to him, and have conversations.

And so Akira almost catches a goldfish. He doesn’t embarrass himself at the ring toss. And when he tries the shooting game--the one that’s always been his favorite--he wins a prize almost without any trouble at all.

For a second, when the man running the shooting game asks Akira what prize he wants, he hesitates. There’s snacks and treats, things he can squirrel away without even needing to explain where he’d gotten them if they’re found. After all, he’d won this fair and square in a game he’d paid for with money he brought with him. And yes, that money is borrowed from the spare change jar his current guardian leaves completely unattended in a locked cabinet in the back of an off limits room, but no one needs to know that! 

But he doesn’t point to any of the snacks. Instead, he points to a Featherman mask and holds it thoughtfully as he turns back to Jun. He wonders if Goro is going to a festival this summer. Maybe, the next time he writes to him, he should mention that he’s won another mask, like he did the summer they were together. He can challenge Goro to do better, and see if he can beat Akira’s score. Then again, if he does, Akira can’t exactly come back to the festival after it’s over to try and get back on top. And what if the summer festival by Goro has already happened? That wouldn’t be fair.

Except--no, it definitely hasn’t already happened. 

(Goro would have written to him, first)

“Everything okay?” Jun asks, and Akira blows out a short, sharp noise between his teeth that he knows will make a loud and not entirely happy or unhappy noise. When that doesn’t seem to satisfy Jun--he looks way more worried than Akira would have expected--he resigns himself to needing to give a better explanation.

Almost reluctantly, he tucks his prize under his arm so he can sign. “I was thinking about last festival. I went with…” He shrugs and trills and doesn’t finish. He’s never found the right sign for him and Goro, because he’s not sure what the word is in the first place.

Jun nods anyway. “Oh right,” he says. “You’ve mentioned him.” 

Akira makes a face, because he doesn’t think he talks about Goro often enough for Jun to recognize him just from that. But he continues, “I played a game like this and won masks. We played with them and it was fun.”

“Ah,” Jun says. “Is that why you didn’t want to come to the festival? You miss being there with your friend?”

Akira shakes his head no, fiercely. Morgana mews, his body language telling Akira you know that’s not true . Akira sticks out his tongue at him, which doesn’t discourage his cat at all. He just laughs at Akira, or--well, it’s not laughing , really, but Akira knows him well enough to know that the little up and down movement of his shoulders means the same thing. Akira decides to end the argument by just ignoring Morgana, and looks back up at Jun. 

Jun’s expression is oddly distant, and he’s looking at the mask under Akira’s arm like it makes him sad. He doesn’t say anything for a while, but then, like he hasn’t realized how long it’s been or how weird he looks, he sighs and says, “I miss going to festivals with my friends, too.”

A little awkwardly, not sure what he’s supposed to say to a sad adult, Akira signs, “Do you go to festivals with them a lot?”

Jun stares at his hands as he signs, then after a pause, he says, “No. I never have.”

“What.”

Jun’s mind seems to be very far away, though. He doesn’t snap back to normal until Morgana meows loudly at him, and then he takes a sharp breath and seems to remember himself all at once. “I’m sorry,” he says. “I don’t know where my mind was just then.”

Neither does Akira, and his hands stay still as he studies Jun and tries to figure out what to do.

“Why don’t you put your mask on before we go buy food?” Jun asks, and Akira is quick to agree, grateful for the distraction. He puts on the mask, and when his face is hidden behind it, he feels a little safer and more distanced from Jun’s strange reactions. He feels like he can be a little less Akira, and a little more… he doesn’t know what. He doesn’t have a name for how he feels with the mask on, even though he kind of feels like there should be one. He pushes past that and instead focuses on what he does know.

Jun is hurting, and Jun had asked him specially to come here, and Akira wants to help Jun feel better. Emboldened by the mask, Akira leans forward and tugs at Jun’s shirt for attention. When he definitely has it, he signs, “If we’re both missing our friends, we can be festival friends with each other.”

Jun looks at him in surprise. Akira looks back up at him with an assurance he never feels.

Then Jun, in a gesture of familiarity as unprecedented as Akira’s stab at opening up to him, Jun puts his hand on the top of Akira’s head. It’s a sort of awkward gesture, but Akira doesn’t hate it. Actually, it… kind of feels nice. If hands can be used to talk, like his are, like Jun’s are starting to be, can this be a way of telling him something too? That Jun cares, that he’s glad he’s here?

They have a good time at the festival for the rest of the evening. Akira doesn’t take his mask off until the fireworks start, when he wants to be sure that he’ll be able to see the whole show without anything in the way. He and Jun sit at the back of a crowd of mostly standing people, because Akira is tired and it doesn’t matter if they’re lower than everyone else, because the fireworks will be in the sky anyway. There’s a low wall where they can sit and watch, and Akira doesn’t notice he’s leaning on Jun a little until he feels Jun’s hand on his head again, just resting there, his fingers moving slightly in a movement that he doesn’t seem to realize he’s doing either, in and out of Akira’s unmanageable curls.

(No one’s ever done that to Akira before)

(Morgana has always been his only source of physical affection, and Morgana is a tiny cat. It’s different and… nice to have an adult showing him they care)

Akira watches the fireworks. His head stays leaning against Jun’s shoulder. In his lap, one hand cups protectively over Morgana’s tiny ears, and the other one holds his mask. And it’s nice.

When the fireworks are over, Akira, Jun, and Morgana wait for most of the crowd to filter away before trying to get out themselves. While they wait, Akira turns to Jun and holds out his mask. 

“This is yours,” Jun says, looking down at it.

Akira, his hands full, makes an impatient raspberry noise and pushes the mask in Jun’s direction again. He seems to at least recognize that Akira’s not going to be able to explain while he’s holding the mask, and takes it. “You seemed like you were having a good time playing in it earlier,” he says. “Are you sure you don’t want to hold onto it?”

Akira shakes his head no. “An older kid took it last time,” he says. “Maybe you can keep it safe for me.”

“Ah,” Jun says, a little noise of understanding. He nods, and says, “I’ll keep it safe for you, then.”

“Thank you,” Akira says. He thinks… he thinks he probably trusts Jun to keep it safe for him.

-//-

After Jun has escorted Akira back to his foster home, and pretended not to notice when he waves goodbye on the front step before darting around to the side of the house to climb through a window, he goes home himself.

He’d hoped that inviting Akira to the festival would encourage him to open up a little, but he hadn’t expected it to have so much of an effect. Although… maybe it’s unfair to say that it had been the festival, when it’s really the mask that seems to have made the difference. He’ll have to keep that in mind for the future--if Akira is ever really struggling with something, being able to hide his face while he does it might help.

He’d even trusted Jun enough to give him the mask that had helped him so much, for him to take care of. Jun weighs it in his hand as he walks through his apartment door, and smiles over the little plastic thing. Today, it turns out, had been a good day.

As he passes through his entryway, he pauses. There’s a mirror on the wall there, and on an impulse, with no one around to watch, he holds Akira’s mask up in front of his own face.

(Black Condor, he vaguely recognizes, the memory coming back from his own distant childhood days spent watching TV alone at home when his parents were out--funny how some things just linger and last, and yet others…)

(He looks at himself, and that mask, and something deep and vital in him aches )

Quickly, Jun lowers the mask again, and turns away from the mirror. The mask is Akira’s, he reminds himself. That’s probably why he feels uncomfortable with it himself. Of course, that’s the only reason.

He puts the mask on a shelf in the closet of the room he hopes will be Akira’s someday, if the fostering goes through. It’ll be there, waiting for him, until Akira comes to claim it. However long that takes, and however long Jun has to wait, he’ll keep the mask right there, ready for Akira so that he can see Jun really can be trusted with the things that are important to him.

Chapter Text

When Jun finally, finally got approved to foster Akira in mid October, he looked down at the paperwork and spent a bit crying in pure relief.

He didn’t know why it had been so hard to get approved. His research said it was generally pretty easy to get approved to foster. It was adoption that would pose the bigger challenge. Yes, he was an unmarried man, yes, Akira had special needs, but it still seemed to take far too long. So, to finally have the paperwork, to be told he could pick up Akira and move him into the apartment the next day, it felt like a miracle.

Then, he jumped into preparing for the next day. He’d bought the basics for Akira’s bedroom already, already set it up. The rest he wanted to get with Akira, so he could choose things he liked. He’d been ready for this for months.

So, when he prepared, he didn’t go to a furniture store or anything of the sort. He went shopping for groceries so he’d have enough on hand for two, and then he went to the flower shop.

—

Akira had been having a fairly normal Sunday. He’d holed up in a corner of a room with Morgana and a book from the library. He’d started to debate sneaking out to do something else, when he heard the foster parent call his name.

So he set aside his book and headed for the sound of the voice. He found Fukuhara holding the door open for Jun, who held a blue and purple bouquet in one hand and a file folder in the other as he carefully toed off his shoes.

Jun’s face broke into a grin, and Akira felt himself smile a little in return, despite his best efforts.

“Akira!” he cried. “Give me a second- there!” He wrestled his shoes off and nudged them into something approaching neat. Then walked over and got to his knees, bringing himself more on level with Akira. “This is for you,” he said, motioning with the bouquet. “Although, I’ll keep holding it so you can sign.”

Akira looked over the bouquet in more detail. It had… he thought he recognized some of the blue-purple flowers as irises, after Jun told him about flower language. That one meant good news, or loyalty. But he didn’t recognize the trailing purple flowers. Nestled among those big ones were some smaller blue flowers. Some looked like typical “flowers”, while others made little trails of hanging upside down trumpet shapes. The smallest flowers were a mix of white with five petals and long pink strands coming out the middle and simpler white flowers with six petals. The whole thing was set among evergreen branches sprinkled with blue berries. It was very pretty, but he didn’t know where he’d put it, and he knew it would take a day at most for one of the rowdier boys to ruin it.

Why? he asked. Is there some occasion?

Jun’s smile grew wider and warmer, and he adjusted himself to hold out the file folder instead. “Have a look. I’m officially approved to be your foster parent now. And you can move in as soon as you’re ready.”

Akira took the file folder with hands that shook, feeling oddly numb. He thumbed through the papers, scanning over them without seeing them. He’d never believed Jun would manage to actually foster him. But, somehow, he did. He quickly reminded himself that, even so, he’d end up moving away eventually, but the thought did little to squash the warm bubble growing in his chest. Jun had fought for him, to help him, and he succeeded.

He handed the folder back, even as Morgana mrrped happily in his ear. He clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth, acknowledging he heard and understood, but he couldn’t think of anything to say. This wasn’t supposed to happen. He didn’t get good things like this. So he had no preparation for the complex feelings starting to snarl inside him.

To distract from that, he asked a question. What are the flowers in the bouquet? I only recognize the irises.

Jun grinned. “You remembered those!”

They’re your favorite. Good news and loyalty, he signed back.

Jun nodded. “Let’s go sit down. You can gather your stuff after. And I can help you with that or not, whatever you want.”

Jun led him to the dining room, sitting on one of the chairs while Akira took another. Jun held the bouquet out between them so he could point to each flower as he discussed it.

“So, you know irises. I put them in the bouquet for both the good news and for loyalty, because I want to be a loyal guardian to you,” he began, before pointing to the long trailing purple flowers. “These are wisteria. They mean welcoming. That one’s pretty obvious, since I want to welcome you into my home and family.”

Next he pointed to the simpler blue flowers. “These are blue daisies. In hanakotoba daisies mean faith, but I’m going off of a more western and specific meaning, for long term loyalty and trust. I hope to be able to continue fostering you as long as you’re happy with it, and even-” his voice cracked with emotion. “Even adopt you some day if you’d like.”

Akira felt his eyes sting and tried to focus on the flowers harder. Next, Jun pointed to the blue trumpets. “These are bluebells. In hanakotoba they’re for gratitude, and I’m grateful you decided you’d like to live with me. In Victorian flower language, they’re for loyalty, like the daisies and the irises, and for constancy.”

Jun moved on to the white flowers with the long pink strands.. “These are volkameria. They mean ‘may you be happy.’” Then he pointed to the plainer white flowers. “These ones are very neat, I think. It’s diphylleia, but it’s also called the skeleton flower. When it rains, the petals turn see-through. So, it represents honesty, or clarity, or showing someone your true self. I want to be honest with you, and honest about who I am to you.

He glanced up at Akira, who gave a nod to show he was listening, then swiped at his eyes with the back of his hand.

Finally, Jun pointed to one of the branches with the berries. “The last part of the bouquet is juniper. It represents asylum, or protection.”

Akira nodded again. Morgana had crawled from his shoulder to his lap and leaned out to sniff the flowers, before he flinched back with a sneeze. Still, he kept purring happily. Akira carefully ran a hand across Morgana’s fur as he tried to get himself under control. This was far too good to be true. Yes, Jun had proved himself fairly decent as far as an adult went. But he didn’t know how that translated to a foster parent. He’d never met a foster parent before moving in with them. He’d gotten to know Jun, but now the dynamic had changed. And Jun could promise all these things. Loyalty, and constancy, and protection and honesty. But Akira didn’t know if he could trust those promises.

(Some part of him longed to. Longed to find a safe harbor and finally take refuge. But the idea of any human being “safe” made his neck itch and his heart race. “Safe” people never were. Either they left, or he had to leave, or they turned out not to be so safe after all. Still, Morgana seemed to like him. Probably this would end one of the first two ways, not the third. So maybe he could get a little safety until he eventually had to move on.)

Jun tilted his head as he looked Akira over, his smile gentling. “It’s okay if this is overwhelming. Let’s just take it one step at a time. Do you want me to help you pack, or no?”

Akira took a deep breath. One step at a time. He could do that. I can do it myself. I don’t have a lot. he signed.

Jun nodded. “Alright. I’ll wait right here, then. My car’s parked outside. After you’re packed, we can put it in the car. You can say goodbye to anyone you want to, and we can get going.”

Akira slipped off the chair with a nod, then headed off to gather his things. He needed to clear his head. He couldn’t let himself believe those promises, not fully. It would hurt too much when they were broken. He could spend the time packing to remind himself of that.

Chapter Text

Akira's first night in Jun's small apartment feels strange. He's the only kid there, and no matter how hard he tries, he can't remember the last time he wasn't sent to bed in a room full of other kids, usually in a house with other bedrooms just as full. Jun doesn't live with anyone else, so it's just him, Akira, and Morgana in this apartment.

It feels weird. Akira tiptoes around the apartment, grateful for once that he couldn't speak even if he wanted to, because he doesn't know what Jun expects him to do. Akira has gotten used to the rituals and routines of foster care, when to listen to the rules and when to stay out of sight and break them. But Jun is just... right there. All the time. Trying to reassure Akira that it's okay to make himself comfortable and settle in.

That doesn't feel likely, but Akira keeps his doubt off his face. Jun seems like a nice adult. Morgana likes him. But it's only the first night, and Akira has been passed around to enough foster homes that he isn't going to make himself comfortable anywhere after only one night. People leave. A lot. And Akira knows he's a lot of work for the adults that are supposed to take care of him. Sometimes people can't figure out what he means when he tries to communicate with him, or they just get tired of his silence, or of Morgana, and they move him along. 

He doesn't know yet if Jun will be a guardian like that. He might be on his way again by morning.

Akira sits on the bed in Jun's guest room, the one he says is Akira's now, squeezing his hands nervously together and watching Morgana's tiny chest rise and fall where he sleeps next to the pillow. Unlike him, Morgana doesn't seem nervous at all. It makes Akira feel a little calmer to watch him, and remember that whatever happens with Jun, he'll still have Morgana.

There's a knock on the door and Akira straightens up, wondering if Jun is maybe expecting him to be in bed already. Most foster homes have a curfew, and if Akira was still at his last one, he'd be expected to be in bed, under covers, lights off. Jun hadn't said anything, but...

The door doesn't open, and Akira realizes that Jun must be waiting for him to answer before he comes in. Akira is more used to people running in and out of bedrooms--other kids barging in without thinking, adults in a hurry doing head counts--so the idea of needing to give someone permission to come into the space is weird to him. Especially since this is Jun's apartment. Why would he knock?

(For a wild second, Akira wonders what would happen if he doesn't do anything)

(Will Jun just go away if Akira doesn't let him in?)

He's too tired to find out tonight. It's been a long, weird day already, and he doesn't want to risk a fight. Instead, he wraps his blanket around his shoulders (it's cold ) and gets up to open the bedroom door. He waves and Jun smiles back. 

"I just wanted to check in on you," he says. 

Akira shrugs uncertainly and retreats back to sit on the bed, Morgana wakes up when the mattress dips, and his eyes flick open. He looks at Jun and then at Akira, and then closes his eyes again. His complete lack of concern about Jun makes Akira feel a little bit better, and he relaxes a tiny fraction.

"I just wanted to come in and check on you," Jun says. "Need anything before bed?"

Akira shakes his head no.

"Alright," Jun says. "Well, do you need me to wake you up for school in the morning?"

Akira has no idea, actually. Usually the older kids at the foster home have to get up earlier, and it's hard to sleep through them crashing their way through their mornings. Akira doesn't really know what time he would wake up if he didn't have other people around to make it hard to keep sleeping. But he doesn't want Jun to think he needs him, or anything, so he shakes his head no again.

Jun nods, a little absently, and looks like he's trying to think of something else to say. Akira watches him, half curious about what he'll come up with, and half... wanting it to be something ? Jun, so far, has been different from most other adults. And Akira's here , isn't he? Because Jun had wanted him to come? That must mean he wants him to be here, and he wants to talk to him. Should Akira try to keep the conversation going?

He tries desperately to think of something, but thankfully Jun comes through in the end, and asks, "Did you bring that blanket with you?"

Akira looks down at it, and a defensive instinct makes him sign--slowly because Jun is still learning--- "It's not for girls."

"Blankets?" Jun asks.

Akira points to the pattern of flowers on the blanket, which he always gets made fun of.  "It's just warm,” he says. And honestly, he likes having something familiar to come back to every night, no matter where he is.

"I like flowers," Jun says mildly, which is true. Akira has seen him wearing a flower almost every time they've ever met, and there are flowers all around in the apartment. 

He squirms a little farther under his blanket, but then has to poke his hands out again anyway, to sign, "Sorry."

"It's okay," Jun says. "I know how people can be. Because flowers are beautiful, and a lot of people have a hard time understanding that people of any gender can like beautiful things."

Akira shrugs.

"You remember," Jun says. "I showed you what the flowers I bought for today mean."

Akira does remember that, but there's a difference between a real bouquet that Jun had put a lot of effort and probably some money into, and some patterned fabric.

"These flowers don't mean anything," he says.

"Flowers only mean anything because people decided they did," Jun says. "If we decide these mean something, they do."

Akira raises his eyebrows and points to a blue flower on the edge of his blanket. He doesn't think that it looks too much like any particular flower, just a blob of blue and green, but Jun nods and takes it seriously.

"Well," he says. "I think that one means welcome."

Akira points to a purple flower next to the blue one.

"Warmth," Jun says, as Akira pulls the blanket a little tighter around his shoulders. "And safety."

He leans over, careful, looking at Akira like he's waiting for permission. Akira nods tentatively, and only after he nods does Jun touch the blanket, pointing to a third floor, this one yellow. "I like this color," he says. "But I think you should decide what it means."

Akira recognizes that he's being asked to participate, and finds that he doesn't really mind. The meanings Jun is making up might not be real, but the feelings behind them probably are. He closes his eyes for a second, and thinks about what he actually wants this flower to mean. Something permanent? Something that won't be taken away?  Or something like the feeling when Jun looks at him. Like he matters. 

...but he can't trust that just because Jun is being kind today, that it means he'll still be here tomorrow. "Bedtime," he signs, and then, in case that isn't the answer Jun was looking for, "A good night's sleep."

"That sounds good to me," Jun says, and the approval in his voice means so much more than Akira feels like it should. Maybe he could have told Jun what he was really thinking after all. Maybe it would have been okay. He smiles at Jun, a little tentative, then lays down in bed with the blanket of their flowers pulled up to his shoulders. Morgana moves over, tucking himself into the usual hollow spot against Akira's ribs, close enough to feel him breathing, and Jun shuts off the light on the way out. Akira tries to close his eyes and sleep, but for a long time he just lies there, running his fingers over the pattern of flowers on his blanket. He can't see them, but he knows they're there--welcome. Warmth. Safety. 

(Home)

Chapter Text

Jun settled down in his bedroom with some tea and looked down at his phone, a faint smile on his face. It had only been a few days since Akira had moved into his apartment, but he was still basking in the joy of the change. He knew that his work wasn't done. There was still so much to do to settle Akira and help him get more comfortable. But, with the fostering finally going through, he knew they'd have time for it.

The fostering also meant it was finally time to tell his parents about Akira.

He loved them, truly, but something had kept him from telling them about Akira until now. Mostly, it was because the situation had felt so fragile while he had battled bureaucracy. He wanted to do it himself, without having to hear his parents’ opinions on the matter, even if they could have helped.

It was also because he hadn't been (and still wasn't) ready to introduce Akira to his parents. Akira was so skittish. His parents, especially his mother, could be a lot. And they wouldn't even be able to talk over the phone, and his parents struggled to work video chats.

So, he'd put it off, until it was more certain. But now, this evening, with Akira and Morgana only a few doors away, it was finally time.

He dialed the familiar number, and held his phone to his ear until the other end picked up.

“Hello Jun! Baby, it's been too long since you've called!” his mom called.

“Hi, Mama,” he replied easily. “Sorry, I've been busy with some recent changes. Is Papa there, too?”

His father spoke up, voice warm. “Hey there, Jun. What sort of changes are we talking? Good, I hope?”

His mom gasped. “Wait, has someone finally caught your eye?”

He could hear the teasing edge in her voice, but still rolled his eyes with a groan. “Mama, don't start…” he sighed, before shaking his head. “It's not that. But it's definitely good. Actually, it's been something I've been working towards for a while. I didn't want to say anything until it all went through but…”

His voice trailed off as he reached for the words.

“Jun? Don't leave us hanging, sweetie!” his mom prompted. He could hear the nerves she tried to hide behind more teasing.

He took a deep breath and bit the bullet. “I'm fostering a child, with hopes to adopt him someday.”

For a single moment, there was a deafening silence on the other end, before his parents started to talk over each other. He could only make out a few snippets.

“How long-”

“-you meet?”

“-too young to be a grandma!”

Jun laughed, but was very glad that he'd had this call without Akira here. He'd definitely take the shock as disapproval.

“Calm down and I’ll tell you!” he cut in.

“Oops,” his father chuckled. “Please, go ahead.”

“Is he with you right now?” his mom asked brightly. “Oh, I can't wait to meet him!”

Jun sighed. “Well, he's in his room right now. And… it might be a bit until I can actually introduce you-” He could sense his mom about to say something, and cut in. “Let me explain!”

When no one interrupted him, he started to explain. “His name is Akira. He's 9 years old. I met him at the start of the school year and started thinking about fostering him in… oh, July? But there was a lot of trouble with bureaucracy and paperwork, and I didn't want to say anything to you until the matter was resolved.”

His tone shifted to apologetic. “But it'll be a while until I can actually introduce you. He's mute, so he can't do phone calls. In order to take him out of the city, I need to coordinate with his social worker. And, well… He's been in the foster system since he was a baby. He has a lot of trust issues. I want to focus on making sure he feels secure about me before I introduce him to anyone else.”

His dad hummed in thought. “Well, I guess we'll have to take your word for it,” he said. “I figure you know what you were getting into when you decided to foster him in the first place. When we do get to meet him, let us know what sort of accomodations he needs.”

His mom made a noise of assent. “But can't you tell us more about him, baby? Or send us pictures!”

Jun felt himself smile, feeling his heart settle. He still knew it'd be a while before Akira was up for meeting them, but their easy acceptance of the situation was a blessing.

“He mostly communicates with writing or Japanese Sign Language,” he began. “He won't bring it up, but I know it means a lot when someone learns JSL for him.”

Hums crackling over the other end of the line. “Well, I can look into it,” his dad said.

“Akinari, you'll help me learn, right?” his mom asked in a sappy tone of voice that would've made Jun gag when when he was a child.

“Of course, honey.”

“Great! Now, Jun, please tell me more about this child!”

Jun nodded although he knew they couldn't see. “Alright. He's a Pisces. He has a cat named Morgana, who is the smartest cat I've ever met. The two are inseparable. He's so clever. Academically, yes, but also in so many other ways. He loves the jungle gym, and climbing trees, and stories about tricksters and adventures…”

Jun rambled on and on, gushing about the remarkable boy that was now part of his life. He told his parents about how far he'd come in earning Akira's trust, and how much further he had to go, and his plans to get there.

His parents commented as he went, their caution slowly melting away at Jun's honest joy. Eventually, the conversation shifted to general catching up. How Jun and Akinari’s classes were going, how things were going at the TV station for Junko. The conversation wound down until they shared farewells and talk-soons, and the call finally ended.

Jun fell back onto his bed with a sigh. It was good to talk to his parents. Good to tell them the good news.

He hadn't shared everything about Akira. Their shared past, back in Sumaru in the midst of a crisis. The strange way the chairman talked about Akira sometimes. Akira's traumas, even those he didn’t remember, were his own to share if and when he decided. Ikutsuki was too strange to put into words. And there were more things Jun had kept quiet still. Those things that weren't his to share, and those things that would paint the wrong picture. So many things. But they weren't as important as what he had shared.

He got to his feet after another long moment, putting his phone away. He let the conversation fall away from his mind. Checking the time, it was time to put Akira through his bedtime routine.

Chapter Text

For the first three weeks after Akira moves in, Jun reminds him that if there's anything that would make him more comfortable in the apartment, anything he needs, anything he even wants, they can go out and buy it. Akira only smiles, which Jun at first takes for a good sign until he starts to get a little more used to him, and realizes that what Akira's really doing is ignoring him.

Akira asks for nothing. He doesn't ask for favorite foods, or for things to make his room more like his own, or for toys or games or things to do. He accepts food at meal times, and has no complaints when Jun buys him a new toothbrush, but other than that, he's taken nothing Jun's offered him. 

(Taken things Jun hasn't offered, yes)

(It hasn't escaped his notice that there's food missing from the kitchen that he hadn't seen anybody eat)

Akira is quiet at home. Not just because he didn't talk, which of course Jun had already known, but because he keeps out of the way a lot. It takes some real coaxing from Jun to get him to open up, and he doesn't seem to know what to do with himself in a place where he's allowed to take up space. Jun can only imagine what life is like for a kid that's grown up in foster care, but he doubts that Akira has ever had his own room, his own space that belongs to him. He acts like he just doesn't believe that he can really live there, that he can make a mess in his space, own more than he can carry in a bag, and not be worried that any of it will be taken away.

So at the end of week three, on Sunday when they're both off, Jun stops asking and tells Akira that they're going to buy things today.

Akira looks at him with his eyebrows raised.

"There's a department store about fifteen minutes from here," Jun says. "We're going to look at getting you some furniture, some new clothes, and something you want. Then we'll pick dinner out together, and bring it home."

"Why?" Akira asks.

Because he just wants to see Akira happy. He wants to see some of that guarded look in his eyes go away.

"I think your room looks a little too empty," he says briskly, because Akira will not want to hear that answer. "And you're already getting too tall for half your clothes."

This at least seems to mollify Akira, who nods at the logic and goes to get his shoes and Morgana. Pleased with himself for this relatively painless start to the day, Jun is in a good mood and smiling when he finally ushers Akira out the door and to the nearest train station. On the way, things are okay. Akira is interested in where they're going, and keeps sneaking Morgana out of his hoodie to hold him up to the window so he can see too.

And then they get to the department store, and things start to go downhill. Akira has absolutely no opinions on clothes, which is probably fair enough for a nine year old, but they manage to buy jeans, socks, and a hoodie before Akira gets actually antsy with boredom. The hoodie is the only thing where Akira expresses any kind of preference whatsoever, and he squirms and explains that he needs a color that won't show as much cat fur. Jun lets this pass, because at least it's something .

Then they move into furniture and home goods. Jun's goal is to leave with at least a desk--which he thinks he can talk Akira into by pointing out he'll need it for homework--a chair, and bedsheets. The ones he's using now are the plain white ones Jun had bought to be temporary, and in his opinion, they're impersonal and boring. He's never exactly been one for interior decorating, but he does like  seeing color and a little bit of clutter in the places where he lives. He wants it to look like a home, not a hotel, somewhere that his flowers--a constant in any place he's ever lived--can thrive as vibrant things, instead of isolated, drowned out decor. 

Akira doesn't seem to agree. He's not having a bad time, as far as Jun can tell. He doesn't seem to have ever been in a furniture store before, and the little nooks and corners on this floor of the department store are obviously a delight to him. But when Jun reminds him that they're here to actually buy something, Akira just asks, " What do you want?"

"I want you to pick something."

Akira, though, seems to have only asked out of politeness. He's already not listening to the answer, and his attention has drifted away to something else. Jun sighs, and tries to herd Akira back on task.

The disappointed sigh seems to work to focus him, but not particularly in a way Jun likes seeing. He picks up on the obvious clue that he's supposed to be doing something differently, and tries. For the next half hour, he answers Jun's questions. With shrugs and nods, mostly, having apparently decided that the easiest way through this is to just agree with whatever Jun asks. 

This isn't going well. This isn't getting Jun what he wants, which is to help Akira fill his space with the things he likes. Jun isn't particularly interested in spending a lot of money on things Akira doesn't even want, and he's not sure how to get a more honest answer out of him. Eventually, he shakes his head and tells Akira that it's getting late, and they might need to try again another day.

(It's not that late)

Jun is convinced that Akira wants things. Behind his habit of smiling to hide his feelings and opinions, he's always shown snatches of strong opinions. He had hated the textbooks he was given to read, but liked the stories about pirates and thieves. He enjoys competing with his friend. And when it comes to Morgana--

Jun, who had been leading Akira back toward the exit, hesitates. "Before we go," he says. "Do you need to get anything for Morgana? I've never had a cat before, so I'm sure you know better than I do what he needs."

For the first time today, Akira shows interest. He starts to sign something too long for Jun to follow, then stops himself and pulls out the small notebook he carries with him. 

There's another brand of cat food he likes better. It's more expensive so I didn't want to ask, but if you want to get something for him, can we get that? 

It's a start. "Of course we can," he says. "I think the pet supplies are on the second floor, so let's go down there and see what we can find."

Akira nods and is away in a flash, so quick that Jun is taken aback and has to hurry to keep up with him. They go down two floors to the pet supply section, and Akira shows Jun the food Morgana apparently likes. It's not actually that much more expensive than what Jun had bought already, but he can understand why a child with presumably no money of his own would think it's expensive. Jun adds it to the pile of things they're buying, along with Akira's new clothes, and asks, "Anything else while we're here?"

Akira hesitates, but when Morgana pokes his head out of his hoodie pocket, he smiles. Then he points to an aisle of cat beds nearby, and makes a clicking noise that sounds a little bit like a question. That's what Jun assumes it is, anyway, so he says, "We can get him a cat bed if you want, but doesn't he usually sleep in your bed with you?"

Akira nods, but then signs--slowly enough for Jun to catch every word-- "But Morgana deserves nice things."

"I agree," Jun says. "He seems like a very good friend to you."

Akira nods furiously, and Jun waits until they've spent a few minutes in that aisle, with Akira carefully weighing his options, occasionally holding something up to Morgana and watching him very seriously for his reaction. Then, when Akira seems to have more or less decided on his choice, he says, "It's nice of you to think so much about what Morgana wants."

Akira shrugs, self conscious, and doesn't quite meet Jun's eyes as he adds the cat bed he'd picked to their pile of things.

"And I know we were talking about how he's been a good friend to you, too," Jun continues. "So I wonder if Morgana also thinks that you deserve nice things."

Akira does look at Jun now, and signs, "I know--" something Jun doesn't understand the sign for. Based on his less than happy expression, he guesses something like I know what you're doing . Which is fair enough, Akira is nine, not four, and he's smart and observant. Still, Jun isn't exactly trying to trick him.

"That doesn't mean it's not true," he says, and smiles when Morgana gives a strong meow! from Akira's hoodie. "It's okay for you to have things you like in your room."

Akira bites his lip, starts to sign something, and then gives up almost immediately and writes it instead. There's a lot of crossings out--furious and thick so that whatever he'd changed his mind on is completely unreadable--but eventually he hands it to Jun.

You never had a foster kid before me. You probably won't have another one after you see how much trouble I am. So when I have to go somewhere else, you're just going to be stuck with a lot of extra stuff. I don't want it to be stuff you don't like. Maybe then you can keep it and it'll be easier for you.

"Akira," Jun says. "You're not going anywhere."

Akira shrugs. "I like living with you," he says, and even though he doesn't say but , Jun can still hear it. 

"How about we pick one thing you like?" he asks. "It can be something small, as long as it's something for you, and not for Morgana. And then in a month, we can come back and get something else, and maybe you'll believe it a little more that I don't want you to leave."

Akira hesitates. Jun can almost see the gears turning in his head. Then he asks, "Can I have a calendar?"

"A calendar?" Jun repeats, not sure he'd understood the sign right.

Akira nods. "I want to hang something on the wall," he says. "It's too empty."

Jun nods with comprehension, and a little relief. He thinks the same thing, and even if a calendar isn't very much, even if Jun can tell Akira is probably thinking that it's something that can just be thrown away at the end of the year, it's still something. 

"I think that sounds like a good idea," he says. "Let's go figure out where they keep calendars."

"You should get something too," he says.

"I'm bringing you home," Jun reminds him. "That's good enough for me."

Akira makes a noise Jun can't parse, but doesn't argue.

In the end, they buy Akira's new clothes, slightly more expensive cat food, a bed for Morgana that Jun quietly doubts will ever be used, since Morgana only ever sleeps next to Akira, a new calendar on sale for 75% off because they're halfway through the year, and the ingredients for a dinner Akira had actually reminded Jun they were supposed to buy today. He even asks for something specific to eat, and Jun has to bite back a cheer.

Chapter Text

About a month after Akira moved in, Jun received a letter addressed to Akira.

Jun stared at the envelope for a long moment. He hadn’t expected anyone to send his foster child any mail. Who even knew Akira was here? Aside from the school and some social services, but this wasn’t any kind of legal-looking communication. It looked like a letter.

He spent a moment scrutinizing the handwriting on the envelope, trying to figure out where it had come from. He’d been a teacher long enough that he could recognize the slightly large, carefully printed handwriting as coming from a child who was trying to show their best penmanship. So it was written by another child, then? The return address listed the sender as Goro Akechi, and it came from a city that Jun didn’t immediately know the location of. It wasn’t nearby, anyway.

The most likely possibility that came to mind was that Akira must have a friend somewhere. Akira’s school had said he wasn’t really making friends in his class, so Jun was glad that Akira might have a friend somewhere. Maybe it would make Akira happy to hear from this other child.

So Jun took the mail inside and called, “Akira, you got a letter.” When Akira poked his head out of his room, Jun held out the letter and asked, “Is this a friend of yours?”

Akira came over to take a look at the envelope. Once he saw the return address, Akira pouted and signed No.

Puzzled by the response, Jun asked, “Is something wrong?”

Akira made a sort of grunting noise and signed, He found me.

That was kind of alarming. A bit worried now, Jun asked, “Is this someone you need to stay away from?”

Yet Akira shook his head empathetically and answered, He’s my… and then he fingerspelled something that was so unexpected Jun thought he read it wrong.

“He’s your…rival?” Jun asked incredulously. Akira just nodded. So Akira honestly had a rival, like a protagonist in a shonen anime?

Akira added, I just didn’t want to be found so fast.

Jun was getting rather confused now, so he asked, “Why not?”

Very seriously, Akira answered, If he takes too long to find me, he loses.

That didn’t really clear anything up. “Loses what?” Jun asked. But this time Akira just shrugged and took his letter off to the living room.

Jun stared after him, wondering what that was all about. But after a moment he decided that Akira didn’t seem to be in any danger, so he let it be. And as he passed by the living room to head to the kitchen, he saw that Akira was smiling as he read the letter.

Later that evening after dinner, Akira came up to Jun, his body language hunched and hesitant. Morgana was perched on his shoulder, purring in his ear.

Wondering what had gotten Akira looking so withdrawn, Jun smiled at him and asked gently, “Did you need something?”

Akira didn’t say anything for a moment, just twitched his hands in little aborted movements. Then Morgana started rubbing his cheek against Akira’s and purring louder. Finally Akira’s hands started to move and he signed slowly, Can I have a… Then he hesitated, made a sign that was unfamiliar to Jun, and fingerspelled, envelope. Then he made a different sign and spelled out stamp.

“You want an envelope and a stamp?” Jun asked. Akira looked down at the floor and gave a tiny nod.

It took Jun a real effort to keep from grinning. Even after a month of living together, Akira almost never asked for anything beyond the barest essentials. It wasn’t hard to guess that Akira wanted to send a letter back to his “rival.” Goro must be pretty important to Akira if Akira was willing to ask for something in order to stay in contact with him.

Jun was more than happy to grant the request, so he said, “Sure. Why don’t we head over to the post office so you can pick whatever pack of stamps you like?”

Akira quickly shook his head and insisted, One stamp is fine. It doesn’t matter what it looks like. Anything is fine.

Jun decided that Akira asking for anything at all was enough progress that he didn’t push. But he did go out and get a whole pack of stamps and a box of envelopes. He could always say he needed them for himself anyway, and this way they would always be on hand if Akira needed to send another letter.

A couple of weeks later, when Jun came in with the mail he called out, “Akira, you got another letter from your friend.”

Akira scampered right over, insistently signing Rival, even as he looked expectantly at the envelope Jun was holding out.

Akira had been slowly growing slightly more comfortable around Jun, and Jun thought by now he might be able to get Akira to open up to him just a little bit. So he asked, “How did you meet Goro?”

Akira had taken the letter in hand, but he tucked it under his arm so his hands were free to sign, We were in a foster home together a few years ago.

So Goro was another foster child. That gave Jun some idea of what his background might be like, and why Akira might be able to relate to him. Just to be sure, Jun asked, “And you two have been sending each other letters since then?” Akira nodded. “But last time you mentioned you didn’t want him to find you so fast. Why was that?”

Akira considered him for a moment. He started to sign something, then apparently changed his mind and instead signed Wait. He ran off to his room, then came back with his notebook that he busily scribbled out a message in. When it was done, he handed the notebook to Jun.

I’ve moved a few times since we lived together, and Goro’s moved twice. We have a competition of seeing who can find out where the other one went faster. So far Goro’s usually faster. Last time it took me more than 2 months to figure out where Goro went, so he beat me this time.

Jun thought that seemed an odd thing to compete over. If it made Akira so happy to get a letter from Goro, he would have thought they’d want to know where each other were right away so they could get back to sending letters. But since it might make Akira happy to “win” their game, Jun offered, “Then next time he moves, how about I help you figure out where he is?”

To his surprise, Akira vehemently shook his head, then wrote out in big letters and underlined the sentence, It doesn’t count if I get help!

Jun gave up trying to figure out what Akira was thinking and just let him go off to read his letter.

After that, about once a month Akira and Goro exchanged letters. Akira insisted every time that Goro was his “rival”. Whatever he called it, Jun was happy that Akira had at least one friend.

Chapter Text

Minato kept a quiet eye on Akira and Mr. Kashihara after learning of Mr. Kashihara’s plans to foster him. He spent time with Akira at the shrine. Sometimes he asked about Mr. Kashihara, always careful not to push too much. Some days, especially during summer break, Maiko and Akira both came to the shrine and the three of them would play. Minato watched the way Maiko lured the shy young boy into more exuberance, coming up with silly games to play. It was nice.

And then, one day, the three were sitting on top of the jungle gym, the two boys listening to Maiko chatter, when a meow came from down below.

Akira immediately focused on the sound, his eyes fixing on Morgana. Maiko was mid sentence when he slipped off the jungle gym and gathered the kitten in his arms. The cat began to meow, almost like talking, and Akira listened intently, starting to wander off towards the exit.

Maiko hurried after him, Minato following behind at a slower pace.

“Akira, where are you going?” she asked, a bit of offense in her tone. “Am I that boring?”

Akira shook his head and pulled out a notebook as Morgana shifted to his shoulder. Mona is hungry, he wrote.

Maiko stared at the cat, hands on her hips. “You know,” she said conversationally. “It's pretty weird your cat follows you everywhere. You even sneak it into school, right? It can wait for a bit, at least to say goodbye!”

As she spoke, Akira’s shoulders raised up, his expression shifting quickly between anger and hurt before settling into his polite smile. Minato tried to step forward, opening his mouth to try to fix the situation. He'd seen that smile before, and it didn't mean anything good.

But Akira just gave a mechanical wave of the hand, before turning on his heel and marching away.

Maiko watched him go, frowning. When the boy was gone, she looked up at Minato. “What just happened?” she asked.

Minato let out a sigh as he watched the boy go. He could feel his own bond with Akira staying as strong as it usually was, but he worried. He'd been becoming friends with Maiko. Would this ruin that for him?

“Minato?” Maiko called, and Minato shot her an apologetic look before trying to explain. “I think you upset him. You pretty much called him weird. And he's very fond of his cat.”

Maiko crossed her arms. “I just didn't want him to go away so quick… And he was smiling, so he'll be okay, right?”

Minato blew out a breath. “I think he smiles like that when he's upset and trying to hide it. He… doesn't trust easily. But I'll try to talk to him about it later. And you can apologize.”

Maiko considered this for a bit. “Okay, I can apologize. I didn't want to upset him.”

Minato gave her a nod of approval. Then, they played a little more, until she had to go home.

Luckily, the next time Minato saw Akira, Maiko wasn't there. The boy was practicing whistling. He was loud enough that Minato could hear him from the street.

“Sounds good,” he commented, and Akira gave a little grin in response.

“Let's chat,” he said, clambering up onto the jungle gym, since he figured the boy would be more comfortable there.

Akira followed him up with his pad of paper. What are we talking about? he wrote.

“Maiko,” Minato said.

Akira made a face. She's mean.

Minato sighed. “What she said was mean, definitely. And she owes you an apology. But I don't think she was trying to be as mean as she was. And just because she was mean once doesn't mean you should just cut her off. You have fun playing together, right?”

Akira scowled as he wrote. She insulted Morgana. We had fun, but I can play by myself. I shouldn't get used to having her around anyway.

Minato sighed, thinking back to his own friends. “Because foster care might make you move?”

Akira looked a little surprised, but nodded.

Minato didn't look at Akira as he started talking. Explaining more about himself than he ever really did. “I was the same way. Foster care moved me around a lot. I gave up on making friends pretty quickly, and stuck to myself. But I've been realizing… it's really hard to go through life alone. I… I don't know yet how to handle the idea I might lose the friends I've made this year. But it feels important that I make them even so.” And not just for the metaphysical benefits.

He looked back at Akira, who looked stubborn. “Besides, if Mr. Kashihara fosters you, you won't have to move,” he added.

Akira gave a shrug. The pair fell silent for a long time. Akira stared down at his pad of paper. Finally, Morgana popped out of his pocket and made a chirping meow.

Akira looked at the cat with a tilted head. The cat made a sound like mrrp!

Finally, Akira wrote What if she keeps being mean? What if she hurts me, or Morgana?

Minato considered this before replying. “If she keeps being mean, or doesn't apologize, then you've tried to give her a chance, and it's okay to pull away. But try giving her a chance first. I really think she didn't mean to hurt you.”

Another long pause as Akira considered this, carefully petting Morgana. They were interrupted by a familiar young voice.

“Akira!!” Maiko called from the entrance to the shrine. She ran over, holding her backpack, and stopped at the base of the jungle gym. “I'm sorry I was mean!” she called up. “I- I got worried because you wanted to leave, and you're my friend, and I don't want people to leave, but what I said was mean. Morgana's your pet and your friend, and it's nice that you can always have him! Please can we keep being friends?”

Akira stared down at Maiko with wide eyes. She was starting to sniffle as she waited for his reply.

Finally, Akira wrote something, then slipped down to the ground to show Maiko. She read the words, then nodded and said, “I'm sorry, Morgana.”

As Minato clambered down, he heard a meow from Morgana, and more writing. Maiko grinned hugely after she read the new message. “Can I hug you?” she asked. “I'll be careful of Morgana.”

Akira hesitated, before nodding. Maiko wrapped him in a hug, and he returned it after a moment.

Watching the pair reunite, Minato let out a relieved sigh. The kids would be alright.

After that, Maiko and Akira frequently played together, both when Minato was there and when he wasn't. But Maiko was dealing with her own problems with her family. She started talking about running away so her parents would find her, and Minato found himself unsure what to do. She was so determined, and he didn't know how else to help the situation.

Finally, one day, he came to her at the shrine. As they talked, he noticed Akira walking up.

“Oh hi…” Maiko said glumly. “I was waiting for you. Is it okay if we talk?”

Minato nodded, and Maiko gave a small smile. “Thanks… So, um…”

She straightened up. “Thank you for always helping me,” she said. “But I gotta say bye for now. Yup. I have to run away now.”

Minato heard a gasp from Akira, but Maiko was focused on him. “Remember not to tell Mom and Dad, okay?” she said. “Bye-bye!” And with that, she walked off.

And Akira immediately ran after her.

—

Akira couldn't believe what he was hearing. Maiko was running away from home, and she seemed to be going about it stupidly. He caught up to her outside the shrine, tapping her shoulder. She whirled around, eyes wide. “Oh, Akira! Um…” she started, before Akira shoved his notebook in her hands.

How prepared are you to run away? What's your plan? What did you pack?

Maiko set her mouth stubbornly. “I packed a lot of snacks and my insurance card,” she replied. And- and… you can't change my mind!”

Akira barely stopped himself from rolling his eyes. She didn't even know where she was going. But food was the first priority.

I'm not trying to change your mind. I want to help you. I'll show you how to get stuff from stores without paying, so you don't run out of food.

Where she'd go would come later.

Maiko eyed him. “Isn't that stealing?” she asked.

Akira shrugged. If you don't have any money, you still have to get food.

Maiko looked nervous, but let her shoulders slump. “Fine. Show me.”

And he did. Or at least tried to. He showed her how to look for cameras, although she had a harder time noticing them than he did. She didn't understand what he talked about when he mentioned focusing. She watched him swipe a snack and heard about how it's better to buy something small if you can. But she was completely unwilling to try for herself. She started getting teary eyed, too.

Somehow, it ended up with them at the takoyaki stand, Morgana in the girl's lap to try to comfort her. And that's where Minato and Maiko's parents found them. Morgana hopped out of Maiko's lap so she could stand and talk to her parents.

Meanwhile, Akira hovered in back, trying to avoid notice. Luckily, tearful reunions were pretty distracting. It was… very awkward. He hadn't realized Maiko was dealing with all this, with her parent's divorce. Family was hard and scary, and let you down. But her parents seemed really worried about her, and sad that she was upset about the divorce. They even apologized. It was odd to watch.

—

Minato watched Maiko reunite with her parents with overwhelming relief. Her plan to show they cared worked, it seemed. And hopefully things could get sorted out.

Once she went home with her parents, Minato focused on Akira. He sat on the bench, gesturing the boy over.

“Thanks for looking out for her,” he said, and Akira's expression went from overwhelmed to annoyed in an instant. He began to write, quickly and angrily.

When he handed his pad over, he almost reached to pull it back, but stopped himself.

She had no plan! Nowhere to go, just some snacks and some card. No money. I tried to teach her how to get stuff without money but she got upset and I didn't know what to do, so we came here.

Minato almost laughed from the righteous indignation on the boy's face and the frustrated scrawl. A bit of worry pricked at him. If he was reading this right, Akira tried to teach Maiko to steal. But it wasn't his business.

When he managed to get his amusement under control, he answered, trying to explain why Maiko acted the way she did. “She's been worried about her parents and if they care about her. She did this to see if they would try to find her. I was pretty sure they would, or someone else would help her out, so I didn't worry much.”

Akira gave him the stink eye, and Minato huffed a small laugh. “C’mon. Let’s go get something to eat,” he offered since they were already at the station strip mall. “Your choice, I'll pay. You deserve it for helping her out and having to watch family drama.”

Akira looked surprised, before looking over the restaurants. Sushi. Some for Morgana too, since he comforted her.

Minato glanced at Morgana, who gave him pleading eyes, almost as if he knew what was at stake. Then he sighed, and nodded. “You'll have to keep him hidden so we don't get kicked out,” he said, before heading towards Wakatsu Kitchen.

Morgana let out a happy meow before diving into Akira's bag to hide. And when they left the restaurant, he scarfed down some fatty tuna Akira had selected for him.

The drama with Maiko happened in August. After that… things got hard. Deaths and betrayals surrounded Minato. But he still tried to keep himself from isolating.

He talked with Mr. Kashihara and Akira and heard from both that the fostering process was moving along. Mr. Kashihara was relieved and happy. Akira was dubious, with hidden hope.

Then he heard that the fostering was going through. Akira started to live with Mr. Kashihara. Things were going well for them. He was glad things were going well for someone around here, at least.

Maiko was patching things up with her parents, although they were still divorcing. Soon, it came out that she was moving away with her mom. She came to the shrine to say goodbye to him, and to Akira.

Akira tried to pretend he didn't care, but Minato could tell from the way the boy held onto Morgana that he was upset. After Maiko left, he and Akira sat in silence for a long while. Minato tried to think of what to say, of what Akira needed to hear.

“It's okay to be sad she's gone,” he finally said.

Akira gave a jerky shrug, writing in reply. I'm okay.

Minato could practically see the walls closing around Akira, and he had no idea what to do about it. He just decided to mention this to Mr. Kashihara. And, for now, he sat with Akira, just being there. He didn't have the answers of how to handle people leaving your life. The wounds left by the past few full moons were raw and aching. But at least he could be here.

Chapter Text

While Minato found that Mr. Kashihara had less time for Innocent Sin Online since fostering Akira, the two still managed some days full of gaming. And, as “Iris” and “Shion” kept playing through the main plotline of the MMO, it kept getting weirder and weirder. Hitler showed up at some point? There was something about ancient aliens too. The city was on the back of a spaceship and they had to stop Joker from waking that spaceship up for some reason. It was really confusing, and Minato kept feeling like he was missing half the story, but the gameplay was still good, and he was curious to see how it turned out.

An NPC had joined their party, some guy named Tatsuya who had a sword and fire magic. They finally tracked down Joker, who said a lot of confusing things. He blamed Tatsuya for someone dying? It felt like there were parts of the conversation missing. Maybe it was glitched.

But the fight worked fine. They fought Joker and the demon he summoned, until his health bar was almost empty. The character fell to one knee. “No! I am Joker!” he screamed. Minato cringed back, quickly lowering the volume on his headphones.

And then the game shifted into an incredibly weird cutscene.

For one, all the background music cut out. It was just ambient noise. And for another the graphics had suddenly changed into something insanely hi-res. It was more realistic than anything he’d seen in a game before. He could see the fabric of Joker’s white outfit, the nicks in Tatsuya’s sword.

And the scene itself was…

Joker rose to his feet and stalked up to Tatsuya, a knife suddenly in his hand. “You…” he snarled. “I’ll never forgive you.”

Tatsuya had been a pretty quiet NPC up until this point. But now he straightened from his battle stance, lowering his sword. “It’s oka-” he began to say, before Joker cut him off with a slash of the knife. His blade scored across Tatsuya’s neck. Blood sprayed out, splattering the white of Joker’s outfit. Tatsuya crumbled in a heap and Minato, watching this scene on his computer, had to take a deep breath to push down nausea.

(Memories of gunshots and blood in the night pressed in. He pushed them away. It was just a game.)

Joker turned towards the camera, although his expression was as shrouded as ever by his mask. “I will always be Joker,” he said. “No matter what I tell myself.”

Then the screen flashed white. Suddenly, everything was back to normal. Sad music was playing. The graphics were normal. The model for the Tatsuya NPC had collapsed on the ground in a pool of red, and Joker was nowhere to be seen.

Minato turned his viewpoint towards Iris, feeling a little shaky. That had come out of nowhere, and it had been so realistic.

Shion: You just got that cutscene too, right?

There wasn’t a reply for a long moment. No sign they were typing.

Shion: Iris, you there?
Shion: @Joker
Joker: I saw it. It was wrong.

Minato frowned at that phrasing.

Shion: It was a bit much.
Joker: No, I mean, that’s not what’s supposed to happen. Joker’s supposed to realize who he really is and stop fighting. He’s not supposed to
Joker: To kill Tacchi
Joker: It’s wrong.
Shion: What are you talking about? C’mon, it’s just a game.

Minato felt goosebumps crawl up his back.

Joker: I need to go, Akira. I’m sorry, I’ll talk to you later.

Minato began typing, to ask if he was okay. The use of the wrong name pinged all his alarm bells. But the teacher logged out before he could press enter.

Okay, mark him officially worried. It was probably nothing. Probably just him being on edge after everything that had happened this year and after seeing that creepy cutscene. But he promised to check on Mr. Kashihara at school tomorrow. Until then… he logged out of the game and stretched. Maybe he could go for a walk to the shrine.

—

Jun Kashihara first found the game in his new desk, back in April. He figured it had been left over from the teacher he was replacing. Innocent Sin Online. Based on a true story.

He thought he knew what that meant after playing for a bit. Someone had decided to make an MMO loosely based on some wacky alternate universe version of the Sumaru City Crisis. But that didn’t explain the way that game made him feel.

He started having nightmares some nights about that Joker figure in the white mask. Never the man who had held him captive with a sword ten years ago. Just the one from the game. He never remembered much about those dreams, but they left him unsettled.

(After a few months, after staying up late grading, he experienced some sort of… hallucination? The world shattered into green and his computer shut off. He thought he saw puddles of blood out the window on the street.

It happened a few more times when he stayed up late, but he didn't dare speak about it. Whether it was real or a hallucination, he did his best to ignore it. Something about that strange green atmosphere struck fear into him.)

He wasn’t sure why he kept playing. The plot of the game always left him with such a strange mix of emotions. It was so snarled he couldn’t tease out the pieces, but he recognized guilt and fascination.

It was fun to virtually crossdress, and fun to play with someone else, but he could have always played some other game for that. Something about this one made him want to know what story it was telling, though, even when it felt like it hurt. That was just a sign of a good story, though, right? It made you feel emotions.

He put it out of his mind most of the time. He had work, and then he had Akira to focus on.

But he logged on for a bit most Sundays or holidays to play.

When he watched the cutscene where Joker killed Tatsuya, he felt like he couldn’t breathe. Tears rolled down his cheeks, blurring the scene before him, but not enough. That face was so familiar… And this was so wrong. It wasn’t- It wasn’t supposed to go this way.

A small whine left him, but the chat window pinged. Shion seemed worried. No, not Shion, his name had never been Shion, that had been a lie. It was Akira. Akira, his little brother, who had trusted him even after watching what he’d done.

He replied on autopilot, then shut the game down. And then the floodgates burst. He curled over in his chair and clutched his head as a new set of memories rushed him. Or, not new. Old memories, from a different time.

He stumbled up from his chair. Akira and Morgana. They were both here. Everyone else had forgotten, had agreed to forget, but he had found Akira and even without memories felt that bond between them.

Something must have happened to Akira. Something must have happened to his parents. Thinking back, to the things that had actually happened in this world, he had a guess who was behind it. But he had to make sure Akira was safe now.

He slid into the hall of his house on stockinged feet. “Akira?” he called. He could hear the panic in his own voice. He was still crying. “Akira, sweetie, where are you?”

He managed to stop himself before opening the door to Akira’s room. He had to respect his privacy. But he was shaking as he knocked.

The door opened. Akira looked up at him with a frown. Morgana was perched on his shoulder.

“Woah, what’s wrong?” Morgana asked. Jun covered his mouth with a hand, muffling a sob. He went down to one knee, looking Akira in the eyes.

Are you okay? the boy signed.

Jun swallowed, then shrugged. He wasn’t sure how he was, but Akira was here, and he was okay. Or at least somewhat okay.

“I remembered,” he said, glancing between the boy and his cat. “I remembered what happened on- on the Other Side. I’m sorry…”

He wasn’t sure what exactly he was apologizing for. For being Joker and hurting so many people? For not finding Akira sooner? For making these two have to face him when he didn’t remember their past?

Akira backed up a nervous step. I don’t understand what you’re talking about, he signed.

But Morgana’s eyes had widened. “Oh! Oh, crap!” He looked between Akira and Jun with clear worry, rubbing against the boy. “Jun, Akira doesn’t remember all that. You- you should go contact Maya, she remembers too. I can explain some stuff later, but you’re freaking Akira out.”

Jun swallowed, wiping away his tears. It didn’t help. The way Morgana was talking, it was like Akira couldn’t understand him. Something terrible must have happened. But a look at Akira’s face showed the boy was afraid. He had to fix this.

He shook his head, trying to calm down. He even succeeded a little. “I’m sorry, Akira. I suddenly remembered something very emotional, and I think I’ve overreacted. I- I’ll explain what happened later, but everything’s okay, and everything’s gonna be okay. Okay?”

He waited for Akira to respond, to sign back a shaky Okay, before he stood up.

“I need to- I need to contact someone,” he explained, before he walked back to his office.

It took a bit of work to find a way to contact Maya. He didn’t remember her cell number from back then, and it might have changed. But she was still a reporter. She had an email address.

Jun quickly typed up an email, then hesitated and rewrote it. Morgana said she remembered, but what if she didn’t?

Miss Maya Amano
I don’t know if you remember me? I’m reaching out with some questions about some events that happened 10 years ago (and maybe some that happened 20 years ago). You can get back to me at this email or this phone number XXX-XXX-XXXX
Jun Kurosu

After he sent it off, he stared at his computer. The tears were starting to slow, at least for now. But, now that he was out of the immediate panic, he felt dread growing. That game… He could only think of one way that game could have been made. And two of the five remembered. What happened if all of them did? But how could he get that game shut down? He couldn’t just explain that it was a ploy by a being made from the malevolence of humans to try to end the world. He’d be laughed at at best.

Before he could think much further, his phone rang, and he picked up.

“Hello, this is Jun Kashihara,” he said on automatic.

The person on the other end gasped. “Jun-kun? It’s Maya.”

Suddenly, the tears were back in full force. “Maya-nee…” he croaked out. He had so much to say, so much to ask.

But she cut him off. “Hang on for just a little bit, okay? I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

He heard the sound of a car starting up. “Wait, Maya-nee-” he started. But she hung up before he could say anything else.

He just had to hope she was a better driver now than she had been. Also, did she know where he was? If so, how?

He was interrupted in his thoughts by a knock on the office door. Briefly, he had the insane idea that it was Maya, here already. But when he opened it up, Akira was there, his flower blanket bundled in his arms. He looked up at Jun, before ducking his head and holding out the blanket.

Jun reached out automatically, taking the blanket. Once his hands were free, Akira started signing, a blush growing on his cheeks. That helps me when I’m upset, so maybe it will help you.

Jun felt himself smile, running his hands over the fuzzy material. “Thank you, Akira,” he said. “Let’s go sit in the living room. There’s some things I should tell you. And we might have a guest coming, although I don’t know when she’ll get here.”

Akira frowned. Who’s coming? he signed

As Jun walked to the living room, he made sure to keep an eye on Akira in case he started signing. Morgana trailed them both, silent for the moment.

He answered as he walked, taking deep breaths to try to push down his emotions. “An old friend of mine. Her name is Maya Amano. It’s… There’s a long story. Something you should know about me, and about yourself. I just remembered it myself but…”

He trailed off as he settled on the couch and patted the cushions. Akira sat down carefully, but he let Jun spread the blanket across both of their laps. Morgana hopped up next to Akira. Both of them watched him with wide eyes.

Jun leaned his head back, blinking back more tears that threatened to fall. He didn’t want to scare Akira if he didn’t remember. But he deserved to, and if he couldn’t understand Morgana…

“Okay,” he began, shifting to face Akira. “So. This is a long story. It’s an old story, too. It started when I was younger than you. And it’s… a strange story, and not a very happy one. But no matter how weird the things I’m about to tell you, they’re all true. Or… they were true. It’s… complicated.”

Akira frowned. How is it complicated? he signed.

“Wait, you're really gonna tell him everything?” Morgana blurted out.

Jun heaved a sigh, nodding at Morgana. “I promised to be transparent and trustworthy, so it wouldn't be right to hide this from you, not after I remembered. But there’s no good way to ease into this. This is a story about something that happened in another timeline.”

He paused to check if Akira believed him. Akira was still frowning, but it was mostly in confusion, not disbelief.

“A lot of things happened in that other timeline,” he continued. “Things I only just remembered now. And I’ll tell you about them in more detail but… Something really bad happened in that timeline. And some friends and I agreed to forget in order to make a new timeline, this timeline. Maya-nee, she said she’s coming- Morgana said she remembers too…”

He cut off as Akira started to sign, pouting a bit. Morgana said? Are you making fun of me?

Jun quickly shook his head. “No, no. Sorry, I meant to explain about that… Akira, you know Morgana isn’t a normal cat. He’s special, he’s smart. He’s been kitten-sized for years.”

Akira drew back, glancing at Morgana. Morgana had his chest puffed out with pride. Akira looked worried.

(He knew Morgana wasn’t normal. But he never wanted to ask, never wanted to figure it out. He was important, and Akira loved him, and Morgana loved him back, and that was all that mattered.)

So what, he can talk? But he never talked to me? he signed, motions sharp and angry.

Jun shook his head. “It’s not like that. There’s… certain conditions to be able to understand him. I met both of you in that other timeline, and I learned how to understand his speech. But I don’t know why you can’t. Back then, you were the first to be able to understand him.”

Akira hunched in on himself, looking at Morgana. Is this true? he signed to the cat.

Morgana nodded, then looked over at Jun. “He lost the ability to understand me after the brain injury,”

Jun blinked. “Oh. I guess that makes sense… That must suck for both of you, though.”

Akira glared at him. What did he say?

“He said you lost the ability to understand him after your brain injury.”

Akira’s scowl only deepened. Okay, so how do I learn to understand him now?

Jun sighed, looking at Morgana. “I don’t know if there’s a way right now…” he said.

Morgana lashed his tail. There’s nowhere where I take my Metaverse form, not that I know of. Maybe… I don’t know if Mount Iwato still shows memories in the pools there. But it’s probably dangerous…

Jun sighed. “The way it works is you have to hear him talk while in a certain form. But he can’t take that form right now. I only saw it through a place that showed memories. Morgana brought up an idea. There’s a mountain in Sumaru City, and it used to be that the pools there would show people’s memories. That might work. But it’d possibly be dangerous. And we don’t know if the pools still do that. Besides, I’d need permission from your social worker to take you out of the city.”

Akira kept glaring, so Jun kept talking. “We can still look into it. I’ll ask Maya-nee if she knows if Mt. Iwato still works that way. But it won’t be immediate, and it might not be possible.”

Akira kept looking at him for a long moment, before he sighed, his shoulders slumping. Fine, he signed. What about your story? With the weird stuff?

Jun took a deep breath, trying to organize his thoughts. The memories and the feelings attached threatened to overwhelm him, but he held it back. Maybe sorting through it, organizing it into a story, would help him process this.

So he started the story. About how he made four friends and played the Masked Circle at the local shrine. His voice shook as he talked about how Maya had been locked in the shrine, how the shrine had burnt down. He talked about how something evil and powerful replaced his father and began to manipulate his mind and memories. Making him believe Maya had died, that Tatsuya had killed her. Using his dad’s conspiracy theories to lead him towards the path he wanted. How rumors started to become reality.

“We spread the rumor that if you called your own phone number,” he explained. “Joker would appear and grant your wish. But if you didn’t have a wish ready, he’d take your ideals. And I became Joker-”

Akira scrambled to his feet, pulling Morgana with him, onto his shoulder. His eyes were wide, his breathing heavy. You were Joker? he signed. His eyes flicked around restlessly. You said you met me back then. Did you hurt me?

Jun choked on his inhale, feeling tears spring up. He shrank back, dashing away the tears, but he didn’t look away from Akira. If he looked away, Akira couldn’t communicate, and that wasn’t fair.

“I… I hurt a lot of people. I wasn’t- I never killed anyone. I wasn’t the serial killer in this timeline. And I never meant to hurt you. I never physically hurt you. But I brought you into a dangerous situation. I brought you to the attention of the thing that pretended to be my father. And…”

He explained about Ideal Energy, about the husks people became when he took it from them. And he explained that he’d done that to Akira’s parents.

“I was so twisted up inside, I let my father use me like a weapon…” he explained. “I’m so sorry, Akira…”

Akira hunched in on himself, scanning over Jun, like he was searching for something. Finally, he sat back down on the couch. Further away, out of range of touch.

Keep telling the story, he signed. His eyes were narrowed with distrust. Jun’s heart ached. He didn’t know what to do. So he just kept telling the story.

How one day a baby showed up when he was summoned, how that baby had been Akira. He assumed that meant the baby was Joker too, somehow, and brought him back to his father. How his old friends had forgotten their past, but still come together to try to stop him and the organization he formed. How, eventually, his friends helped him to see the truth, both for the fire at the shrine and what he’d been doing. And how, as soon as he realized that truth, and that his father was dangerous, he got Akira away from his dad as soon as he could.

Akira didn’t interrupt him for the rest of the story. When Jun said the name Nyarlathotep, he shuddered without seeming to realize it, but he didn’t interrupt. Jun reached the very end, where they agreed to make a timeline where they never met as children, in order to save Maya and the world.

“And that’s this timeline,” he finished. He looked at Akira with a weak smile.

Akira had his brow knit in confusion. The way you said I acted… he signed. That doesn’t sound like a baby. You… said I had a Persona? I don’t understand.

Jun blinked and rubbed his head. “Sorry, I should have explained that on the way. You really don’t remember?”

Akira shook his head, his expression starting to turn blank.

“You… weren’t a normal baby. Or, I guess, at some point you were, but that was before we met. For a while, we just knew you were smart, that you understood speech and had a Persona. But, in that spaceship under the city, we kept finding rooms that showed us memories. We found one from Morgana which was how the rest of us learned to understand him. And we found one from you. Morgana could understand your baby babbles, so he translated as you explained that-”

He hadn’t noticed until too late. The polite smile Akira started to wear, the way his body went tense. The boy leapt to his feet again, signing fast and clumsy. I don’t want to hear it. he signed.

Jun frowned. “But-”

Akira clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth. That wasn’t me. It was a different- He paused, then slowed down, fingerspelling the new word. T-i-m-e-l-i-n-e, right? And I don’t remember any of it. So it’s not me.

Morgana leaned against Akira, his worry plain to see. “Akira…” he sighed, his voice trailing off.

Jun could have tried to explain. How Akira had kept his memory of the previous timeline. It must have been the brain injury that took those memories. But, looking at Akira, he realized the boy really meant it.

“Okay. I’ll keep quiet. But if you ever want to know, I’ll tell you. Or I can translate for Morgana. He’s been with you the whole time.”

Akira gave a curt nod, then turned and left, heading back to his room. Jun started to let him go, then remembered the blanket. He got to his feet, starting to follow him. “Wait, Akira, do you want your blanket?” he called.

Akira froze in the hallway, shoulders tensing to his ears. Then, he turned back. He didn’t meet Jun’s eyes as he grabbed the blanket. Finally, he fled, his door closing behind him with a thud.

Jun watched him go, feeling something sink in the pit of his stomach. He felt like he’d ruined something. But it would be wrong to keep quiet about all this. He just hoped things could be recovered.

—

Akira dropped onto his bed like a rock, his breath hitching. He wrapped the blanket around himself, lying with his back to the mattress so the back of his neck was safe. This was… so much. Jun had been Joker, but it was different from the serial killer that had kidnapped him. That story had been full of wild things, with no proof, but he believed Jun. Jun wouldn’t lie to him, or at least wouldn’t tell such ridiculous lies.

But… why had he been involved in this? He had been a baby. But apparently he had had a Persona, whatever that was. And there was something else there. He could feel it, the size and weight of that missing puzzle piece. Something told him it would answer so many questions he never thought to ask, but it scared him. That wasn’t him. It felt like the way people had looked at him when he did too well in school. All those expectations. Would Jun treat him differently now, expecting whoever he’d been before the brain injury?

Was Morgana just waiting to see if he’d turn into that other version of himself?

Morgana crawled onto his chest and purred, looking down at him with concern. Akira realized his cheeks were wet and wiped them quickly.

(A prickling at the back of his neck warned him not to try to remember. That it would hurt, that it was wrong. He let that and his own fears push his worries deep inside, where he locked them away. It didn’t matter. He’d just make it clear he didn’t want to talk about that, and he’d go on like before.)

He focused on his friend, carefully sitting up to give him time to move to his lap. Morgana could talk. Jun could hear him talk, but Akira couldn’t.

(Once he’d been able to, but- No. Don’t think about it.)

That wasn’t fair. Life wasn’t fair, but this in particular stung at him. Would he have to rely on Jun to translate forever?

But… talking wasn’t the only way to communicate. He’d learned that a long time ago. He’d learned to read Morgana’s body language, but if Morgana understood Japanese… There were other options.

He slipped off his bed and went to his desk, shifting Morgana to his shoulder. He quickly ripped a piece of paper from a notebook and sketched out a letter chart, then spun around, looking. Where was his… There! He found his backpack and dug to the very bottom, pulling out his hated AAC device.

The device let you type out words and it would speak them for you. Akira hated using it, hated letting something else speak for him. He brought it to school for the rare situations where he absolutely had to use it and sign language or writing wouldn’t cut it. But maybe Morgana would be okay with it. He switched it on.

Finally, he set the paper and the device down on his bed and put Morgana next to him. He raised his hands and signed, his heart pattering in his chest. You could use one of these to talk to me, he suggested.

Morgana lit up, his ears perking forward. He bounded over to the AAC device, circling it and testing his weight against it, before trying to press a few keys. The synthetic voice that came out made Akira grimace a little, but he pushed that away. “This works,” the voice said. Morgana said. The voice didn’t match Morgana at all, and it spoke without emotion, but Akira could see the emotion through Morgana’s body language.

He grinned. It worked.

—

With Akira and Morgana gone, Jun collapsed back onto the couch and cradled his head in his hands. The tears were coming back. He didn’t fight them. There was so much filling up his mind. Telling the story had helped some, but not enough.

He could feel Chronos again, like a cool breeze. He felt… different, somehow, than Jun remembered, but that made sense. Jun was different. It had been a decade since rumors had come true in Sumaru City. He was an adult.

Chronos helped, too. Helped him order things in his own mind, helped him slowly start separating the two sets of childhood memories that tangled in his mind. He reminded himself that his parents were both alive, that their relationship was better than it had been on the Other Side.

He missed his friends dearly. But, maybe Maya would really come. It was about two hours from Sumaru to Tatsumi Port Island, although he didn’t know if Maya still lived back home. He raised his wrist to check his watch. He realized with a start that it had been nearly an hour and a half since Maya had called him. He didn’t know how long he’d spent telling Akira about his past and how long he’d spent having a mental breakdown on the couch. It didn’t matter, he supposed.

He rubbed his hand along the simple leather strap of his watch, his stomach lurching. There was no engraving on this one. The material itself was wrong, leather instead of metal. It wasn’t the watch Tatsuya had given him so long ago. Because that never happened in this timeline. He never got that watch, and he never gave Tatsuya his father’s lighter. At least now he knew why his heart had been so convinced the lighter belonged to Tatsuya.

And that made him realize something else. Tatsuya had to remember too, right? The way he’d acted back then, he had to have known what was happening. He tried to keep Jun from remembering. And… that was a worry. When they had agreed to forget, they’d all hoped they could one day remember. But if Tatsuya was trying so hard to keep Jun from remembering, then what if…

He was pulled from his thoughts by the buzz of the doorbell. He checked his watch again. He hadn’t lost track of time since he last checked, so barely any time had passed. He got up and peeked through the peephole, worrying that this could just be some door-to-door salesman. He did not have the energy to handle that.

But instead he saw a familiar face. Older, more mature, but familiar all the same. He fumbled with the door as tears sprang up once more, then flung it open and stared at Maya Amano. She looked worried. But she was here.

He choked on air, then rushed forward to wrap her in a hug. “Maya-nee…” he whispered. Her arms came around him and he let his tears drip down his cheeks. He wanted to bury his face in her shoulder and never come up. Her arms felt so safe.

“Oh, Jun…” she murmured, stroking his hair. “C’mon, let’s get out of the doorway. We have a lot to talk about.”

Jun squeezed his arms tighter around her for a moment, drawing strength, then pulled back and gave a watery smile. “Of course. Come on in,” he said.

Maya gave a sad smile of her own, letting him lead her to the couch. Then she sighed. “I guess the first thing we should cover is, how did you remember?”

Jun sat down next to her, his shoulders hunching. “I’ve been playing this MMO lately, called Innocent Sin Online. The plot… it’s basically exactly like how things happened with us. Except…”

He swallowed, fiddling with his watch. It didn’t feel right. “I had reached a point where… where I fought Joker, to try to convince him to come to the side of good. There was an NPC who was basically Tacchi. But at the end of the fight, I-Joker didn’t stop being Joker. He stabbed Tatsuya.”

Maya gasped, then wrapped him in a one-armed hug. “Oh, that must have been upsetting! But- that’s…”

She took a deep breath, facing him directly. “Jun… Currently, you and I are the only two of our group of childhood friends that remember. If all five of us do… It could lead to that other world overwriting this one, basically ending the world. If that game is out there, and Tatsuya, Eikichi, or Lisa play it…”

Jun fiddled with the fringe of his hair. “It would be bad,” he finished, his heart sinking. “Not many people are playing the game anyway, but I don’t know how to get it shut down…”

Maya thought for a moment, before nodding to herself. “Okay. We can handle this. Or, really, I can contact Kaoru and he can handle this. Based off of what you said, I’d bet the Crawling Chaos had something to do with that game, but it’s still just computer code.” She pulled out her phone, starting up a text.

“Who’s Kaoru?” Jun asked.

“Oh, right. Kaoru Saga. He used to go by Baofu and run a rumor site in Sumaru, but he’s been a people-finder for years now. He should still be good enough with computers to handle this.”

Jun politely didn’t look at her phone as she typed. Instead, he let his thoughts tick over. Everything felt easier to handle with Maya here.

“Wait a second,” he said as Maya set her phone aside. “You said just you and me remember. But I remember that day the museum burned down. The second time. Tacchi definitely seemed like he remembered back then.”

Maya’s grimace made his heart sink. “What happened to him?” he asked, dread dripping from his words.

Maya shook her head. “He’s alright. And you’re right, back then, he did remember. But he doesn’t remember anymore. He… The Tatsuya that remembered went back to the Other Side.”

Maya saw Jun’s expression and huffed a rueful sigh. “It’s a long story, tied to the Sumaru City Crisis.”

Jun nodded. “I figured as much. And I have a lot of questions about what really went down then.” He glanced back down the hallway. “Like, how did Akira get involved again? He got a brain injury, and ended up in foster care. How did that happen?”

Maya blinked and frowned in confusion. “How do you know about that?” she asked slowly.

Jun flushed in embarrassment. “Oh. I… should have mentioned this already. I’ve actually been fostering him for over a month.”

He stopped, feeling unsteady at the raw emotion on Maya’s face. She clasped her hands over her chest. “You… you found him? He- We tried to keep him, but Katsuya had to surrender him to Child Services, and then he got lost in the system… We couldn’t find him again.”

Jun nodded, fiddling with his hair. “He’s in his room with Morgana right now,” he explained. “I was letting him cool down after telling him about what happened on the Other Side. He… got a little upset. But I’ll check on them and see if they want to say hi.”

Maya smiled, her lips trembling. “Please do. I’m so glad Morgana found him too…”

Jun smiled back and got to his feet, ghosting down the hall to Akira’s room. He knocked on the door, and waited.

He heard footsteps. Then the door opened. Akira looked up at him, then glanced away. Morgana was still on the bed next to… was that Akira’s AAC device?

“Hey, my friend Maya is here if you want to meet her,” he said, trying to gauge Akira’s expression. It was flatly neutral. It didn’t tell him much.

Akira glanced back at Morgana, who had perked up. The kitten started doing something on the device. And it really was the AAC device, because, moments later, a synthetic voice said, “She’s nice.”

Jun couldn’t help the smile as he realized how quickly these two had figured out new methods of communication.

Akira shrugged. Okay he signed, before he went back to the bed, scooping up Morgana and the AAC device.

Jun nodded, leading him back to the living room, where Maya was still seated. However, when Akira and Morgana entered the room, she got to her feet, clutching her chest. “Akira! Morgana! You…”

Jun saw the way Akira inched back a step and his shoulders tensed, so he stepped in. “Akira doesn’t remember anything that happened when he was a baby,” he said. “Also, you should know that he can’t speak, although he can hear. He mostly communicates with JSL and writing.”

“Hi, Maya!” Morgana called out, even as he leaned into Akira.

Maya took a deep breath as she took in all this information, then nodded. “Okay. That… that makes sense.” Then she turned to Akira, giving a bow. “Hello, Akira. It’s very nice to meet you. My name is Maya Amano.”

Akira frowned, then glanced at Jun. Can you translate for me? he asked.

“Of course,” Jun replied.

Akira nodded, still looking nervous, but started signing. Jun did as he said and translated. “He says it’s nice to meet you too.”

Maya finally smiled again and sat down. “And it’s nice to see you again, Morgana. We all thought you went back to the Velvet Room.”

Morgana twitched his tail, glancing away. “I did for a bit. Then I left to find Akira myself.”

Jun decided to keep translating, repeating Morgana’s words for Akira’s benefit. Then he sat down next to Maya. Akira took a seat on an armchair, setting Morgana and the AAC device down on the side table.

Maya nodded. Then she glanced between Akira and Jun. “I suppose I should explain.” She fully faced Akira. “Akira, after what happened to your parents, some friends and myself ended up taking care of you for a time. When the Sumaru City Crisis ended, a friend of mine named Katsuya Suou wanted to adopt you and take care of you. But Child Services made him hand you over to foster care, and within a couple days we couldn’t find you anymore. So, I’m sorry we never found you. You shouldn’t have had to grow up alone.”

Akira tensed up as she spoke, lowering his head and hiding his expression. It’s alright, he signed politely. Jun immediately started translating. I don’t remember my parents before they died, or you, or this S-u-o-u. So I didn’t miss any of it. His hands twitched like he wanted to sign more, but he put his hands in his lap instead.

Jun watched him with worry. Morgana nudged Akira with his head.. “This would be way easier if you could hear me talk,” he said, then glanced over his shoulder. “Jun, what about-”

“Right!” Jun interrupted. “Maya-nee, the pools in Mt. Iwato. Do they still show memories?”

Maya blinked, briefly lighting up as she understood their meaning, before her expression shuttered itself. “No. No, that went away with the rumors. Sorry.”

Akira bit his lip, looking up. He looked devastated. Morgana, sitting nearby, cried out, “Dammit! That would’ve made things so easy!”

“But!” Maya continued. “I’m sure we can figure something else out. And until then, Jun can translate, or you can use that talking machine thing.”

Akira nodded along, but Maya and Jun could both tell he didn’t really believe her.

Maya fiddled with her ear in thought, then frowned. “Wait… Akira, you said your parents are dead?”

Akira gave her a look like she was stupid. Yeah. That’s why I was in foster care.

Maya shook her head. “Did no one tell you?” she asked. At Akira’s blank look, she muttered under her breath “I guess this explains why he never visited.”

Jun frowned. “Akira hadn’t been told a lot about when he was a baby before we met. I told him what I knew, before I remembered, but that isn’t much, and the information isn’t in his file.”

Maya rolled her eyes. “Of course it wasn’t.” she sighed, before focusing on the boy sitting across from her. “Akira, your father… he’s in a coma. He’s been in a coma for ten years, and there’s little chance he’ll wake up, but he’s alive.”

Akira’s brows snapped together. How? Why?

Maya touched her ear again. “We’re not sure exactly what happened. A… very wealthy friend of mine has been ensuring his medical bills are paid, so you don’t need to worry about that. But he’s been at Nanjo Memorial Hospital. You can go visit him, if you’d like.”

Jun saw the way Akira ducked in on himself, his expression going blank and polite, but he didn’t know how to stop it. Morgana placed a paw on Akira’s knee. “You don’t have to-” he started, but he was interrupted when Akira stood up abruptly.

I need to think about this, he signed. You three have a lot to talk about anyways, and I don’t want to hear about that stuff anymore. Not right now. So I’ll be in my room.

Jun, as with the rest of Akira’s signing, translated for him, then gave him a tired smile. “That’s completely understandable. This is a lot to deal with. Take your time, and if you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask.”

Akira gave a jerky nod, then turned and headed for his room, walking just a bit too fast.

Everyone watched him go. His door closed softly behind him, and still no one talked for long moments. Then, Morgana lifted his chin in determination. “Akira will be fine. He just needs time. He’s strong. He can handle this.

Maya gave a fond smile. “You were always so devoted to him. I’m so glad you found him. But how did you find him, anyways? The rest of us couldn’t track him down.”

“I used the Dark Hour,” Morgana said, puffing out his chest with pride. “During it, I can kind of feel anyone with a Persona, or the potential for one. It… It took a long time, but I just checked every person one by one. Eventually, I found him, then approached him. He… he doesn’t remember me, not from before. But something of our bond must have still been there, because he immediately started treating with, well, with love. So I stayed.”

Jun frowned. “What do you mean, the Dark Hour?”

Maya was frowning in thought, until she lit up, “Do you mean that weird extra hour at midnight?”

Jun stiffened. “Wait. You mean, when everything goes green and the electronics stopped? But that only started happening this year!”

(As he spoke, Jun felt relief pool through him. It wasn't a hallucination.)

Maya and Morgana shook their heads in unison. “It started up a little after everything ended in Sumaru,” Maya said. “But you wouldn’t have noticed without your Persona.”

“Those without the potential turn into coffins during it,” Morgana said. “Actually, I think it started up in this city, although I don’t know much more than that. I know it wasn’t a thing in 2016, so someone’s probably going to stop it. Master Igor was keeping an eye on it, so I’m sure it’s fine.”

Jun took all this in and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Well, that’s… something.”

Maya’s smile turned lopsided. “Have you ever seen what it’s like outside during it?” she asked Jun.

Jun shook his head. “Just what I could see out the window.”

Maya swung her arm in a familiar motion. Let’s Think Positive! “Then let’s stay up tonight. I’ll show you!”

Jun huffed a laugh. “I have to work tomorrow but… we do have a lot to talk about.” He checked his watch. “I should start on dinner soon, too. Though I may just order something.”

Maya nodded along. “After getting your memories back? Definitely a day to order out.”

Jun glanced back at Akira’s door. He’d check on him in a bit. The boy hadn’t shown any particular distaste for any food so far, though he did like curry. He could order something nice for him and give it as a peace offering.

He turned back to Maya and let some of his exhaustion show. “I’m worried about how Akira will handle this. It… it didn’t feel right to keep the truth of his past from him. Especially since he’s never been told much about it. He didn’t even know it was JOKER who kidnapped him, just that someone did. So I told him what happened on the Other Side. But, learning I was Joker too… His trust always seems so fragile.”

Morgana hunched in place. “You’re… not wrong. But I still think he’ll pull through this. I’ll do my best to make sure he doesn’t give up on you, Jun. He… he usually listens to me. Though, I think he’s upset he can’t hear me, so I don’t know how that’ll affect things.”

Maya nodded along. “Sorry this has all been so rough. But Let’s Think Positive, alright?” She started listing off things on her fingers. “It looks like you’ve figured out a workaround already with that talking device. Kaoru will be able to take down that game sooner than later. And I’ve got good news to give about Morgana and Akira to my other friends. I’m sure this’ll work out.”

Jun couldn’t help but smile at her old catchphrase. “You’re right,” he said. “And I’m glad this meant I could see you again, Maya-nee.”

Maya beamed at him, putting a comforting hand on his shoulder. After a moment, she let it drop. “As for the Sumaru City Crisis… Well…”

Maya and Morgana took turns explaining what had really happened during the Crisis. Jun listened attentively. Anger kept flaring in his chest, at the Sudous and at Nyarlathotep. But they were all gone, dead or sealed away. So he took deep breaths and let the anger pass.

He glanced back at Akira’s door. Akira had been through so much, too. He hated the idea of Nyarlathotep hurting Akira, posing as his father, manipulating him like he’d done to Jun. That selfish part of him wanted to wrap Akira up in a blanket and shield him from the world, but the dangers had all passed, now. That wouldn’t help. Time. Time and care. That’s what he could give Akira. Time to learn to trust him, to trust that he wouldn’t be torn away from him. Time to relax and unwind. Time to get used to a new life and a new home. Time to get used to the idea of having a home.

He checked his watch. It was getting close to dinner time. He gave Morgana and Maya both a smile, then said, “There’s a place that does curry nearby. I’m planning to order something and pick it up.” As he spoke he went to his little folder of takeout menus and pulled out the one for the curry place, passing it to Maya. “Let me know what you want, Maya-nee.”

Morgana nodded in approval. “Good idea! Lemme see the menu, I can tell you what Akira would like.”

—

They ordered and Jun left to go pick it up, while Maya and Morgana sat and chatted. Morgana was so happy to have people who could hear him speak again. Finally having more than just Akira who treated him well made him feel just a little bit like when the Phantom Thieves were active.

They caught up. Maya was still a reporter, of course. She talked about some of her recent articles. Morgana brought up Ohya, although he didn’t know if she was active yet, and Maya said she’d keep an eye out for the name.

Morgana talked about how things had been for him with Akira. He admitted that he’d left the Velvet Room to be with him, and Maya’s understanding smile made him feel warm inside.

Eventually, Jun came back with a bag of takeout. He dropped it off on the kitchen counter, smiling at Morgana and Maya. “Hey, Morgana, let’s let Akira know there’s food,” he said, holding out his hands in an offer to pick Morgana up. Morgana jumped into his hands, then clambered up to his shoulder as Jun headed to Akira’s room. The time to decompress had done Maya and Jun a lot of good, so hopefully Akira was feeling better too.

Jun knocked on the door. “Akira?” he called out. “I picked up curry. Do you want to eat in your room, or come join us?”

Morgana and Jun both listened for a knock or two letting them know if they could come in or not, or for the sound of footsteps approaching the door. But there was nothing.

After a long few moments, Jun tried again. “Akira? If you don’t respond, I’m gonna open the door to check on you.”

Morgana’s tail lashed as nerves filled him up. Still there was no response. So Jun eased the door open. Both Morgana and Jun craned to look inside.

The window was open. Akira was nowhere in sight, and the window was open.

Jun clearly came to the same conclusion as Morgana did, because he stepped into the room, his heart starting to pound. Morgana hopped off his shoulder onto the window sill, peering outside, but there was no Akira there either.

Jun looked around the room with growing panic. Under the bed, in the closet, anywhere Akira might be hiding. Morgana watched him, his own panic feeling like it was locked behind glass.

He couldn’t help but think of the other times he’d lost Akira. When Sudou took him, they tracked Akira down quickly, but not before Akira sustained a brain injury. When he was lost to the system, it took Morgana years to track him down.

This was different, he told himself. Looking around, there wasn’t any sign of a struggle. Akira must have left under his own power. But why? Why would he do that?

As Jun went back to the living room to tell Maya that Akira was missing, Morgana hunched in on himself. Why had he left? And why didn’t he take Morgana with him?

—

Hours earlier, when Akira closed the door to his room behind him, he let his expression crumple in the way it had been wanting to since he heard his father was alive.

It was too much. Too much to deal with. Jun had been Joker, had put him in danger. Morgana could talk, but not to him. The one idea they’d had so Akira could understand Morgana was a bust. And Maya had looked at him with such open sorrow as she apologized that he’d ended up in foster care.

(What would his life have been like if those adults had held onto him? He couldn’t even imagine it.)

And now, his father was alive? In a coma for ten years? What was he supposed to do with that? He didn’t know anything about his father or what he’d have been like. He was supposed to go visit a stranger who couldn’t even try to understand him?

Deep under those thoughts, in a place in his mind he didn’t want to look at, he was terrified. When he tried to imagine his father, his breath grew short. The back of his neck prickled. Deep down, some part of him was certain that his dad hurt him, and would do it again if he could. Even without being able to remember, that feeling was clear.

Akira paused at his window. As he’d fallen into his panicked thoughts, his body had moved on autopilot. He’d packed his backpack with some changes of clothes, some useful things, a bit of money he’d squirreled away, and his stash of stolen food. And now, his hands were on the window, about to open it.

What was he doing?

Running away. He couldn’t handle this. Jun could be dangerous. With new memories back, he might start acting like a completely different person.

And his dad… if he left, he wouldn’t have to deal with the idea of his dad in a hospital, asleep for ten years.

It was better to leave before things got worse. He could figure it out. He could take care of himself.

Morgana… Morgana didn’t need him. He had people he could talk to, people he knew. He was part of their world, part of that crazy story of a different 1999.

If he really wanted to stay with Akira, though, Akira was sure he could find him again. So it was fine.

Akira looked over his room one last time, checking for what else he might need. His heart panged at the flower blanket, the one Goro had given him. He thought of the way Jun helped him come up with meanings for each blob of a flower and his eyes burned.

But that wasn’t the same Jun as this new one. And Akira wouldn’t be able to fit the blanket in his backpack.

It felt wrong to leave without anything to remind him of Goro, though. As a compromise, he found the last letter Goro sent him and folded it up, before slipping it in his bag.

Now, what else…

The black featherman mask… that was just a reminder of the old Jun. And it would break too easily.

Nothing else stood out to him, even when he focused. So he slid open the window.

Jun’s apartment was on the second story, but there were enough handholds in the stone. That, plus a nearby storm drain, made working his way down to the ground a simple job.

And then, Akira was out. He glanced around, schooling his expression back to neutral. Then, he set off into the city.

Chapter Text

It's already dark when Akira slips away from Jun's apartment. Escapes from him. From Joker. Akira doesn't understand, still, how Jun could have told him that story about the air museum when Akira was a baby, protecting him from Joker, and all of the time he'd been Joker? And then--and--

And Jun can understand Morgana? Even though Jun had done... had done bad things that Akira doesn't want to know about. He wants to put his hands over his ears and curl up in a ball and pretend that all that is going to keep from knowing about what Jun did. And Morgana ? Why would he... why...

Akira sniffs and hugs himself, feeling unbearably lonely because there's supposed to be someone there to hold. He hates this. But it's the only thing he can do to make himself feel safe. Jun is a stranger again. Jun is not the patient adult that looks at him like he counts for something, even though Akira is Akira. He's not the same person that had learned sign for him, and brought him flowers, and told him all about what they mean. Akira can't scrub away the way Jun had looked earlier when he'd opened the bedroom door and seen him standing there, shaking, looking at him with an expression Akira has never seen on him before. Jun has remembered something that's changed him, and Akira doesn't know who he is, anymore.

( Joker )

Akira doesn't have any idea where he's going. It's like the part of him that has learned to plan ahead, to hoard food and rely on himself, has been scared off by the horror of what Jun has become. And also, even though he's trying really hard not to think about it, there's whoever he used to be. That's a question Akira can't even look at, because he doesn't want--he can't remember. That would hurt, it would be... it would be wrong , and he can't face the question of why head on. Just ducks his burning, itching neck and stays far away from those memories.

A soft whine pulls Akira out of his thoughts. He sniffs and rubs his face, which is wetter than he feels like it should be, and realizes he's slipped off the sidewalk and pressed himself up into the shadows of the buildings around him, trying to stay out of sight. But the whine belongs to a dog he's just about to pass, and now that he's paying attention Akira realizes he knows that dog. It's been a long time since he's seen Koromaru at the shrine, but Koromaru's worried whine as he looks back at Akira says he still remembers him. His tail wags a little when Akira stops walking and looks at him, and that's all the encouragement he needs to kneel down next to the dog and wrap his arms around his warm, fluffy body. 

The dog is real and alive and exactly the same as always, letting Akira pet him and cry right there in the middle of the sidewalk. Akira might have stayed there forever, except that it turns out Koromaru hadn't been walking by himself. He should have noticed it, he's usually way better at paying attention, but he's had a terrible day and that's why he'd missed Minato, right up until Minato actually kneels down next to Akira, his expression very worried.

Akira turns his face away, burying it in Koromaru's soft fur.

"Shouldn't you be home?" Minato asks. "It's... pretty late."

Akira doesn't look up, just shakes his head violently no . It's not safe at Jun's apartment. And Jun's apartment isn't--it can't be--home. Homes are supposed to be safe, and Akira isn't safe there now that Jun has remembered something that makes him someone else. Jun's home (not Akira's) is full of people he doesn't want to have to see. Jun's there, obviously, whoever Jun is now. And Jun's friend that had tried to keep him when he was a baby. And Morgana, who can talk to everyone but him. 

"You're not going home?" Minato asks.

Akira shakes his head again. He wishes Minato would stop calling it his home, because it makes him think about how he was supposed to go shopping with Jun this weekend. After two months, he'd been starting to feel like he could count on that happening. It's stupid, but he'd actually started making tentative plans for what he might ask for, because he--he'd kind of liked it when Jun talked about how he could make the extra bedroom feel like his.

(He wants--he'd let himself want somewhere that felt like home)

(And now that it's been snatched out of reach, Akira can't help feeling disappointed with himself for wanting it in the first place)

There's a short pause. Akira is vaguely aware of Minato leaning over to peek at his stuffed full backpack, and then he asks, "Are you running away?"

Akira hesitates, but he remembers that Minato had helped Maiko run away instead of telling adults. He nods a tiny bit.

"Did you and Mr. Kashihara have a fight?" Minato asks.

Akira shrugs. Everything that had happened tonight feels too big to just be called a fight, but he can't think of a better word, either. 

“Is he okay?” Minato asks, and he sounds really worried now. 

Akira blows out a puff of air, as frustrated as he can make it sound, because Minato doesn’t sign and it’s too dark to write anything, so his communication options are limited. And even if they weren’t, even if Minato was fluent in sign and Akira had enough light to write by, what would he say? He can’t explain what had happened to Jun. He doesn’t understand it himself, and doesn’t want to .

“I was talking to him earlier,” Minato says. “It seemed like… something happened?”

Akira hesitates, then nods emphatically. Yeah, something had definitely happened.

“Something happened to Mr. Kashihara,” Minato says. “And you possibly had a fight, and now you’re running away.”

Akira makes a helpless, hopeless gesture and Minato looks at him, then looks around, then finally says, “You should come back to the dorm with me. You can explain what happened. And stay the night.” 

He says it almost casually, but Akira really considers the offer. He doesn’t have anywhere else to go, and staying with Minato tonight has to be better than curling up somewhere on the street. He has a few ideas, he could maybe curl up somewhere in the shrine, or in a corner in the station where they’re doing a bunch of construction. But both of those are going to be cold, and anyone might find him, and the dorm sounds much nicer.

Akira nods, and ducks his head a little as he wipes his face and squares his shoulders, ready to follow Minato. Koromaru follows, tail wagging, and presses his soft face into Akira’s hand. Despite himself, despite everything, Akira smiles a tiny bit. Koromaru is no Morgana, but he’s such a good dog.

(He… kind of hopes Morgana will come to find him again)

(Even if he has other people he can understand now, Koromaru is unintentionally reminding Akira how much he misses his friend)

It doesn’t take them long to walk to Minato’s dorm, and Akira walks most of the way there with his shoulders hunched and his eyes fixed firmly on the ground in front of his feet. He tries to stay quiet, but Koromaru keeps whining softly and pressing his nose into Akira’s hand, looking up at him with big, worried eyes, and it’s like he’s giving Akira permission to cry. And he’s already cried, and Minato is standing right there, walking a polite step or two away, but his shoulders hurt with how hard he’s trying to keep them still, not shaking with the sobs he’s keeping back, and his face is scrunched up with the same effort, and this horrible, embarrassing noise keeps coming out of him anyway, high pitched and small, so at some point he decides he might as well just cry for real.

Minato looks mildly panicked, but he doesn’t tell Akira to stop, or get angry, so Akira just keeps going. The more he thinks about it, the more it hurts. He’s lost Jun. And maybe Morgana too, if he decides not to come looking for him. He’s all on his own, and he’d known this could happen, he’s always known it, but he’d needed Morgana so he’d let his guard down, and then… then Jun…

Jun, Joker, Joker who had hurt him when he was a baby, and Akira still isn’t sure whether to believe that or not, because the Jun he knows would never hurt him.

But that’s the problem, isn’t it?

The Jun he knows isn’t the Jun he’d run away from.

Minato guides Akira into a much nicer building than he’d been expecting, and sits him down in the lounge just off the front door while he goes to tell some people that Akira’s here. Nobody that’s going to kick him out, Minato promises, and Akira has absolutely no emotions left to worry about whether he’s telling the truth or not. He’s tired, his chest and his throat hurt from crying, and he ends up curled up on the lounge’s sofa, hugging his backpack to his chest with one arm while he buries his other hand in Koromaru’s fur. 

The only reason he doesn’t cry himself to sleep is that he’s too exhausted to manage a single sob before his body gives up on him and sends him to sleep.

-//-

It takes Minato more than the few minutes he'd expected before he's able to find Mitsuru, tell her that a nine year old is staying the night, answer her alarmed questions about who Akira is, explain that he's Mr. Kashihara's foster son, reassure her that everything's fine, then do the same thing three more times as more members of S.E.E.S. show up to join the conversation --

Anyway. It's closer to forty five minutes by the time Minato gets back downstairs, with the news that Mitsuru has grudgingly agreed Akira can stay the night. She hadn't been happy about it, and Minato can't exactly blame her, after everything that's happened recently. After all, it hasn't been that long since Ikutsuki betrayed them, since her father died, since Shinjiro died, since Chidori died...

She's trying to keep another kid from getting close enough to them to end up hurt, Minato's pretty sure. He doesn't blame her. And he's feeling a little heavy himself, as he makes his way back downstairs. It'll be nice to have something else to focus on, for once. But Akira really is young, and shouldn't be anywhere near them, and the dangerous things they do with the Dark Hour.

Akira is also, it turns out, asleep. By the time Minato gets back to him he's curled up on the couch, one arm around his backpack, the other stretched out to where Koromaru is lying on the floor next to him, close enough that Akira can tangle his fingers in the dog's fur as he sleeps.

Minato sits in a chair where he can study Akira. Something is very wrong here. Between Mr Kashihara's weird reaction to the video game, and then finding Akira panicking and ready to run away, something is obviously off.

Minato is very worried about Mr. Kashihari. And with everything that's happened lately, Minato is... he's scared to lose a bond. At the beginning of the school year, he wouldn't have cared. Would have said that it's only natural to drift away and lose track of people, because no one ever stays for long. But that's starting to change for him. The more he opens himself up to his bonds, the more determined he is to hold onto them.

Maybe it won't be forever, or even for long. But Minato is determined to hold onto his precious bonds for ho w ever long he can. Right now, he is very afraid that he's about to lose Mr Kashihara, to something he doesn't understand, and it's taking everything he has in him to not wake Akira up and start grilling him immediately.

Instead, he tries to find other ways to occupy himself while waiting to see if Akira will wake up on his own. He's finished his homework, and is poking through his mp3 player for something to listen to, when the dark hour hits. Minato hadn't been paying much attention and startles, but then a second later relaxes again. Still, there's no point playing with his music now, so he slips it away and starts thinking about just going to bed and dealing with Akira in the morning.

Koromaru whines softly, and when Minato looks over he does his second double take in less than a minute. Akira is still there, asleep, even though the Dark Hour is here. So he's another person with potential? But he's even smaller than Ken. Probably younger, too. Minato glances up at the ceiling, toward the upper floors, where his friends are, and above them the camera equipment. Supposedly it's been shut down, but Minato makes a mental note to go check them in the morning. It's not that he thinks anyone here would want another grade schooler on the team, not after everything, but...

Well, it'll be easier for Akira if no one else finds out. Minato doesn't think he'd appreciate being watched and worried about. He'll keep this quiet.

And he doesn't go to bed after all. Since he's worried that someone else might come down and find Akira here, he stays and keeps a somewhat stressful watch over the younger boy. For about forty five minutes nothing happens, apart from some small, unhappy noises Akira keeps making. But then Akira suddenly starts awake, all at once, and scrambles to get his legs under him, crouching on a corner with his back to the couch’s backrest, and both hands pressed over his neck.

"Akira?" he asks, but Akira doesn't even blink. Just stares straight ahead of him, trembling a little and pale with fear.

-//-

Akira bursts awake from confused nightmares. Morgana isn't there, and his first reaction is a sinking disappointment and scrabbling fear--he's always had nightmares, but they've been better since he found Morgana. But now Morgana isn't here--and it's Akira's fault -- but Morgana wouldn't want to be with him anyway, would he--Morgana has secrets, and adults that can understand him--anyway he could find Akira if he wanted to,and--and--

He's aware, in some tiny place in his mind that has somehow managed to stay calm, that he's focusing on Morgana, thoughts spinning in panicked, half complete circles, because thinking about the nightmares would be more than he can stand right now. That Morgana is still helping him with nightmares, even though he isn't even here. He doesn't want to think about the dreams. Remembering is... it's wrong. It hurts. Akira doesn't want to be hurt, the way he had been when...

(His hands clench tighter around the back of his neck)

( Dad ...)

"Akira, come on..."

He blinks, not sure how many times his name has already been said while he wasn't able to hear it. Minato is standing in front of him, half crouched, expression curved down into a frown. Akira wants to sign that he's sorry, but Minato doesn't know sign, and he's scared to move his hands down and expose the back of his neck.

"Akira," Minato says, again. "Tell me what's wrong." He starts to move, very slowly, toward Akira. When Akira realizes Minato is about to put his hand on Akira’s, on the back of his neck, he feels an icy flash of terror flood through him. On sheer instinct he jerks forward, teeth bared to bite . Minto ducks away so that he only catches empty air. It startles him out of the worst of his panic, and he forces himself to lower his arms. He scoots sideways across the couch, carefully keeping his back away from Minato, and pulls his notebook out of his backpack.

It's dark, the eerie green dark from some of his nightmares, but when Akira mimes using a flashlight, Minato shakes his head.

"Power's out." he says.

Flashlights use batteries, but Akira has already made enough of a scene tonight. so he lowers his gaze and doesn't argue. Instead he crouches over the notebook, squinting, and writes, Nothing's wrong. I always have nightmares . Minato doesn't have to know it had been worse than usual tonight.

Minato glances at the page, then shakes his head. "I don't just mean the nightmare," he says. "I'm worried about Mr Kashihara. I know you're supposed to be with him, not here or on the streets. And I know he would never have kicked you out. So what happened that was so bad you had to run away?"

Akira doesn't answer for a long time. He doesn't know what to say. But finally, very slowly, he writes, You don't have to worry about him .

Minato says, "Well now I'm more worried."

He's fine , Akira writes, a little rough now. He underlines it three times, because Jun is fine. He’s not hurt, he’s just different. And he doesn't want to explain more than that to Minato, and he's definitely not going to try and explain Joker. But he does add, almost more for himself than for Minato, He probably won't want me around anymore . And then, definitely for himself, What if he wants me to go back to my dad?

"Your dad?"

Even though Akira had been the one to mention him in the first place, he flinches back from Minato at the word, and clenches his hand as the old scar throbs. He shakes his head no.

"I thought you were an orphan," Minato says.

Akira hesitates, then nods, and writes a shaky, Me too .

"Then how could Mr Kashihara send you back to him?"

It's... complicated. Jun figured some stuff out.

"I talked to him this afternoon," Minato says. "He seemed like he'd just gotten a big shock."

Akira nods.

"And you think that because Mr Kashihara's figured something out," Minato says. "You're not safe with him now he knows whatever that is?"

Akira hesitates. Jun had been Joker. Joker had hurt him. Jun had told him he wouldn't, now, but what's Akira supposed to believe? He doesn't trust anyone, especially not adults. Not more than they've proved to him that he should trust them, because--because people leave. Because things that feel safe usually aren't.

But Jun had brought him home. To his home, that is. He'd promised Akira things, and kept those promises, and Akira is...

He's...

He'd let himself believe in Jun, and he's scared that Jun is about to let him down. If it had been anyone else, he would have been able to be let down. He would have been able to build his walls up a little and move on. But he doesn't want to move on from Jun! He wants Jun to be the person Akira has started to really believe he is.

I'm scared, he writes, and feels raw and exposed. He looks up at Minato through the darkness, begging with his expression for Minato to understand.

Minato doesn’t say anything, so Akira doesn’t know if he does. But he tells Akira he can stay the night, and that they’ll figure out what to do in the morning. That feels like about what Akira can manage right now--putting the hard decisions off until later. He goes back to sleep, back (and neck) pressed firmly into the back of the couch, and as he drifts off to sleep his last thought is that he wants to go home.

Chapter Text

Jun had spent all night searching for Akira with Maya and Morgana, with no luck. Morgana was certain he'd eventually be able to find Akira, but Jun was terrified of what could happen before they did, and he could tell Maya and Morgana had similar fears. They were pretty sure that he'd run away given his missing backpack, but that didn't mean something wouldn't happen to him alone in the streets. And that wasn't even considering the Dark Hour.

But he had work in the morning. He wanted to call in sick. He almost did. But then he realized he might be able to ask his students to keep an eye out for Akira. Besides, the routine would do him good, and Maya and Morgana would keep searching throughout the day.

So he put on some light makeup to hide the signs of exhaustion, pinned a zinnia to his chest (remembering absent friends, both for Akira and for his newly remembered childhood friends), and headed to the school.

And into his homeroom class. Only to be bombarded with the resonances of four to five different persona users. He felt Chronos react to Arisato, Iori, Takeba, and Aigis clearly. Mochizuki, the newest transfer student, gave off some sort of resonance too, but, before he could think much about it, Arisato got up to approach him. Leaning on his desk with one hand, Jun tried to prepare for the question he expected, the question about why he suddenly had a Persona. After all, he figured those students with Personas would be able to sense him too.

But that's not what Arisato said.

—

Minato had stuck Akira in his room when the kid woke up, with Koromaru to keep watch. He gave the kid permission to raid the fridge if he was hungry, and promised to be back after school. (Hopefully that would be enough to keep Akira from running during the school day.) He was exhausted from keeping vigil the night before, but hopefully today he could talk to Mr. Kashihara and sort this out. Plus he could always nap through some of his classes.

He let the chatter of his classmates pass over him as he waited, watching the door. So, when Mr. Kashihara entered the room, he saw the way the teacher stumbled, his eyes flicking around the room, before meeting Minato’s eyes.

Something in his expression almost looked scared, behind confusion and guarded exhaustion. But Minato didn't know what to do with that, so he just ignored it as he walked up.

“I found Akira by himself last night,” Minato started. Mr. Kashihara gasped, but Minato forced himself to say what he’d been planning to say without being interrupted. “I let him sleep at my dorm last night. He's pretty upset.”

Mr. Kashihara took a deep breath, his hand going to his chest and eyes closing in relief. “Thank you so much for looking out for him,” he said, clearly struggling to push down heavy emotion. “He's okay? He's not hurt?”

“He's not hurt physically,” Minato said. “But his backpack was full, and he was upset. He said some things… and we should probably talk about some of it before I take you to him.”

He eyed Mr. Kashihara. Despite Akira's insistence that his guardian was “fine,” Minato didn’t really believe it, and the shifting emotions on his teacher’s face only made him more worried. He'd never seen Mr. Kashihara like this before.

Mr. Kashihara gave him a tight smile, fiddling with his watch. “Okay,” he said. “We can talk after classes. I just need to make a call before we start for the day.”

Minato waited for a moment, but Mr. Kashihara turned stiffly and walked outside the classroom, so Minato took his seat and let sleepiness win out. He had no idea where the conversation with Mr. Kashihara was going to go.

At least he could be relatively sure that Akira had been wrong about Mr. Kashihara not wanting him.

—

Outside the classroom, Jun had a hurried phone call with Maya. One of his students found Akira last night. Akira was safe at some of the student dorms, and they could go get him after school. When Maya suggested she and Morgana use the time to nap so they'd have energy, Jun half-smiled, agreed, then hung up with a polite farewell.

He didn't know how the conversation with Arisato would go. He didn't know what part of the previous day had made Akira feel like he had to run away, but he kept beating himself up for not realizing how upset the boy was. He was determined to fix this, especially now that his worries for Akira's immediate safety were allayed.

For now, he had classes to teach.

(And as the day went on, he found himself wondering about the teens with Personas in his class. Did they just happen to have Personas, or were they involved in something bigger? If the latter, it probably had something to do with the Dark Hour and the strange tower he, Maya and Morgana had seen during the last Dark Hour. Maybe he could ask Arisato about it, since it seemed like none of the students were going to approach him about it. He didn't even catch any unusual looks from anyone.)

—

After classes, Minato met up with Mr. Kashihara. They found an empty classroom without a word between them. When they both took a seat, Mr. Kashihara asked, “So, what happened last night? What did Akira say?”

Minato considered for a moment before answering. “I was planning to ask you that. He… he's scared you don't want him anymore. And something about you sending him to his dad? Especially after that cutscene we saw in the game, and how you came in this morning…”

Mr. Kashihara paled. “Right. With everything else, I forgot about that. Well… I'm assuming you noticed I have a Persona now…”

Minato couldn't stop his reaction. His jaw dropped. “Wait, what?” he demanded, his heart pounding in his chest. He tried to rationalize it. Maybe Mr. Kashihara didn't mean that kind of Persona. But the way he said it…. “You have a Persona?”

Mr. Kashihara had been staring at his hands, but Minato's outburst made him look up, his brow furrowing. “You… couldn't sense it? The resonance?”

Minato shook his head quickly, his back straightening. His hand itched for a sword to defend himself. “I have no idea what you mean by resonance. And I don't have any navigational abilities.”

Mr. Kashihara leaned back in his chair. “Huh,” he murmured, mostly to himself. “I felt all the Persona Users in your class when I walked in… I guess the way things work has changed some…”

He seemed to get lost in his own world for a moment, before he shook himself out of it and gave Minato a rueful look. “My story is… a very long and convoluted one. I… I'm willing to tell you more, if you want to hear it, but not right now. I guess… the broad strokes.

“The broad strokes are, when I was a teen, I had a Persona. A lot of things happened. And things got very bad. My friends and I made a deal with someone to forget each other and our Personas in order to stop the bad things from happening. But…”

He sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “Innocent Sin Online…”

Minato frowned at the mention of the game, but kept quiet.

Mr. Kashihara explained that the game had been a trap to make him or his old friends remember. That he himself had regained his lost memories the day before. But it would be dangerous if all of his friends remembered, so a friend of a friend was going to get the game shut down.

He gave Minato a weak smile. “So, sorry, but we won't be able to keep playing together.”

Then he shook his head, fiddling with his watch. “I told Akira about what happened. He… was involved in those events, in a way. Maybe that scared him, or what I told him about myself. I… I've done some bad things when I was younger. An old friend who remembers those events came to visit, so maybe she scared him or…”

Mr. Kashihara trailed off, staring into space. Minato went over his words, worry pricking in his chest. He had a lot of questions about whatever Mr. Kashihara had been involved in as a teen. Was it related to the things the Kirijo group had been doing? The things Ikutsuki had been raving about?

Full moon was coming up fairly soon. He had to find out if that information was important for his team before then. Despite all the Arcana Shadows being gone, he still expected the full moon to lead to something. But, for now, he had to be more concerned for Akira.

“What about his dad?” he asked.

Jun bit his lip and shrugged. “Apparently, he's alive but in a coma, and has been for ten years. My friend, Maya-nee, knew about it. She brought up that he could visit, but there's very little chance he'd actually wake up, so Akira wouldn't go to him. And, even if he did…”

He trailed off. Minato wasn't sure whether he meant that he'd try to keep Akira, or that a coma patient of 10 years would have a long period of rehab before being able to take custody, but he supposed it didn't matter.

He slipped out of his chair, hands shoved in his pockets. “Alright. I've got more questions about whatever you went through, but for now we should go talk to Akira.”

(He decided not to tell anyone else, at least for the moment. He didn't want to subject Mr. Kashihara to a full interrogation, especially from Mitsuru. But he'd tell them if it was important.)

Mr. Kashihara got to his feet as well, giving another strained smile. “I might have questions for you too, but you're right. First, let’s go see Akira.”

—

Akira had listened to Minato and stayed in the dorm for quite a while. He curled up miserably on Minato’s bed, swapping between dozing and trying to think. Thinking about his problems was overwhelming, though. He didn’t know what he was going to do. Some part of him wanted to get up and head for the train station, leave Iwatodai before anyone could find him. He could do it, he knew.

But he’d gotten used to Iwatodai. He’d be leaving Minato, who understood and met him where he was at. It’d make it harder for Morgana to find him. And he’d be leaving Jun…

But that was the problem. Jun. He had wanted to stay with Jun, but Jun was different now. Jun might hurt him, or might not want him anymore. And if that happened, would Akira go back to foster care?

Could he handle an uncaring house after getting a taste of what a home felt like? It would probably be better than going on the streets, but something in him rebelled against the idea. And part of him was terrified of what the system would do to him if Jun gave him up.

(What if he was sent to his dad?)

His thoughts kept going in circles. He liked it at Jun’s place, but he couldn’t trust Jun anymore. And he didn’t know what Jun would do, because he didn’t know Jun anymore. In some of the scenarios he thought up, it’d be better to just run now and stay on his own. In others, it was better to let Jun send him back to a group home, but his heart ached at the idea. So he stayed where he was, frozen with worry.

At least Koromaru was there. He wasn’t as good as Morgana, but he was soft and he stayed with Akira.

Eventually, he had to get up and eat something. Minato had said something about raiding the fridge, but Akira didn’t want to get in trouble, and he had packed his stash of food into his backpack.

He sat at Minato’s desk, picked something out at random and ate it without really tasting it, but the food at least gave him more energy. It gave him the energy to make a small decision. His thinking wasn’t helping. Maybe he could explain more of it to Minato and Minato could help him figure it out, but if he stayed in this room he was just going to keep lying on the bed and thinking in circles. For now, he needed to distract himself.

He didn’t want to stay in the dorm for that. Too much chance of messing with someone’s things. But the clock on the wall showed that there was an hour or so until the high school let out, and Minato had said he’d come back after classes. So he pulled out a piece of paper and left a note on Minato’s desk.

Minato
I’m going to spend some time at the shrine. If this note is here, I’m not back yet, but you can find me there.
Akira

After that, it should’ve been easy to just slip out, still wearing his backpack just in case, but Koromaru followed him throughout the dorm and, when he went to the door, the dog whimpered and blocked the way.

Akira huffed, putting his hands on his hips. I’m just going to the shrine, he signed, but obviously the dog didn’t know JSL.

Akira let his eyes wander as he tried to figure out how to convince Koromaru he was only leaving temporarily. Then he spotted a leash nearby. He grabbed it and showed it to Koromaru. If he took the dog on a walk, that obviously meant he’d bring him back, right?

Koromaru eyed him with a tilted head for a moment, before giving a short bark and trotting up to him, letting him attach the leash to his collar.

Akira let out a sigh of relief, then finally headed out of the dorm.

When he got to the shrine, he let Koromaru off his leash and drifted towards the playground. He lost track of time clambering around the jungle gym and letting his mind go blank.

He was drawn back to reality by one of the loudest meows he’s ever heard. He turned his head to see a black and white kitten racing towards him.

Akira dropped down to the ground, his mouth going dry with nerves. Some part of him tried to deny the truth he saw. Maybe this was some other cat. But he pushed that away as he got on his knees and held his arms open.

Morgana crashed into his chest like a furry bullet, meowing at him like crazy, a purr rumbling beneath all those sounds. Akira curled over his friend, wrapping his arms around him, as tears began to roll down his cheeks. Between quiet sobs, he rumbled his own “purring” sound.

Morgana had found him. Morgana still wanted him, still wanted to stay with him. Although his heart still ached and although he still didn’t know what the future had in store, it suddenly felt easier to breathe. It was like there had been a hole in his chest ripping open without the supports Akira had started to get used to, but now Morgana’s presence helped bridge the gap.

The two sat there for a long time, clutching each other and crying and purring. After the initial burst of meowing, they didn’t try to communicate, not yet.

—

Maya watched the scene, a lump rising in her throat as she heard something that sounded so much like Tatsuya’s motorcycle impression. It was ridiculous. Something so silly making her so emotional. She wanted to go over there and join the hug, but she held herself back. She knew Akira, but she didn’t know how much he had changed since she’d last seen him, and he didn’t remember her at all. And she knew she’d never forgive herself if she made the wrong move here and ruined things for Akira and Jun. So she turned to the beautiful albino Shiba Inu that had come up to sniff her, and focused on giving the dog as many pets as she could so she wouldn’t interrupt the moment. (Also the dog had a Persona? Which was weird. Could he talk like Morgana?) But she kept an eye on the pair by the jungle gym. When they relaxed their frantic hold on each other, she pulled something out of her bag and approached with a smile.

—

Akira looked up at the sound of footsteps, growing tense. He didn’t like the idea of some stranger seeing him cry like that. But it was that woman who’d come to Jun’s house the other day. Akira didn’t know if that was better or worse.

She smiled at him, holding a familiar object. The AAC device. “Morgana, do you want to use the AAC device, or do you want me to translate for you?” she asked.

Morgana meowed, and she nodded and set the device on the ground. “I’ll be just by the bench, you two,” she said, backing up. “And I’m very glad you’re safe, Akira.”

Akira barely paid her any attention, focusing on Morgana instead. I’m so happy you found me, he signed. Why was she with you?

He let Morgana type on the device, waiting patiently. He felt exhausted from all the crying, but this was important. Morgana was important.

Morgana hit a button and the device spoke for him. “She and Jun and I searched for you all last night. I’m really happy I found you. I was so scared when you disappeared.”

Akira frowned at that, fiddling with his hair, before signing again. Worry pricked in his heart. Are you going to stay with them, then? he asked.

Morgana blinked at him in clear shock, before turning to the device. Although the robot voice spoke with no emotions, Akira could almost imagine Morgana shouting the words himself. “No! I’m staying with you, no matter what. I’d like us to both stay with Jun, but if you won’t, then I’ll follow you wherever you go. No matter what.”

Akira felt tears well again and roughly rubbed at his eyes, clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth to show he’d heard. Morgana pressed against him, purring like an engine, and the sound helped him calm down.

I’m glad, he signed. I thought you might choose not to follow me.

Morgana just pressed against him harder for a moment. Then Akira signed a question. Where is Jun?

Morgana turned to the keyboard to explain. “He went to work so he could ask people to keep an eye out for you. He said you were staying at one of the student dorms last night. Maya called him when we found you here, so he should be here soon. He was very worried about you.”

Akira let out a small shudder. He didn’t know what to do with all that. Was Morgana telling the truth? Was Jun really worried about him? Morgana said he’d been scared, too. It never occurred to him that people might feel that way about his troubles.

He needed Morgana, obviously, and he’d known Morgana had needed someone to care for him and make sure he got food, but he hadn’t realized Morgana needed him in specific. What if Jun felt the same?

But…

Jun is different now, Akira signed.

Morgana sat back, watching him with a tilt to the head, before turning back to the device. “Is that why you ran away?”

Akira shrugged. Some of it.

Morgana considered him for another long moment. He started to type, but was interrupted by the sound of running and a frantic cry.

“Akira!!”

Akira looked up with a flinch to see Jun running towards him, eyes wide in panic. He skidded to a halt a few feet away, panting, unable to look away from the boy in front of him. Akira shrank back a little from his searching gaze, scooping Morgana into his arms, who happily snuggled against him.

“Akira, are you hurt?” he asked. “Arisato said you were fine physically but…”

Akira shook his head. I’m not hurt. he signed.

Jun nodded, taking a deep breath. “Then… then I should apologize. And we should talk. Arisato told me some things about why you ran away, but I want to hear it from you, and work to fix whatever problems we have. I… I know last night was a lot, and I probably should have been more careful about how I told you about my past, but…”

Akira considered Jun for a long moment. But Morgana’s presence by his side, and his promise to stay by his side, gave him enough courage to respond. You’re different now, he signed, his gaze skittering away. You could hurt me. Or send me away. Send me to… His hands stilled in midair as he struggled to make the thought visible.

Jun sat down on the ground, crossing his feet. Behind him, Akira could see Minato come up the stairs to the shrine and head for the bench where Amano and Koromaru were. Jun fiddled with his watch. “Send you to your dad?” he finished, his voice soft. At Akira’s stunned look, he held up his hands. “Arisato mentioned something about it. Akira, I don’t ever want to send you away. I… I won’t say I’m exactly the same as I was before I remembered my past. That would be a lie. But those memories have only added things, not taken anything away. I still care about you just as much. If not more. I want you to stay with me as long as you want. And, for your dad… well, it’s extremely unlikely he’ll ever wake up. You don’t have to visit him if you don’t want to, either. But even if he does somehow wake up…”

He paused, gaze going distant for a moment, before he looked at Akira with a fervor. It felt like it should have scared him. But he’d seen something like it in Jun’s eyes before. It was just never as open as this. It felt… protective.

“If he did wake up, I’d fight to keep you with me,” he said, his words a solemn vow. “If that’s what you wanted. So, please. You don’t have to be afraid. I’ll never give up on you, and I’ll never hurt you on purpose. And if I ever manage to hurt you by accident, I promise I’ll work to fix it and make it up to you.”

Akira bit his lip, shifting in place. The words rang true in his chest. He felt that aching hole in his heart slowly patching up a bit more, but he couldn’t trust the words alone. Jun’s actions before had been what convinced him of the man’s sincerity. Maybe he could wait and see if his actions would back up his words once more. And… if he had to leave, he knew Morgana would come with him.

He met Jun’s eyes fully, feeling a shiver go down his spine. He signed back. I don’t want to hear about the stuff I forgot again.

Jun leaned back a little, but nodded. “That’s okay. Some of Maya-nee’s friends will probably come by to visit me in the next month or two, when they have time, but you don’t need to feel obligated to get along with them. We might talk about some of the stuff that happened back then, but you don’t need to be a part of it.” He smiled with a bit of mischief. “They’re all grown-ups, so they’re probably boring to you anyways.”

Akira ducked his head, cheeks flushing at the teasing tone, and gave a shrug. Whatever strangers Jun would meet were unimportant right now.

Silence spread between the group of three, before Morgana wriggled out of Akira’s arms and went to the AAC device once more. “So, are you coming back with Jun?” the robot voice spoke out.

Akira looked between Morgana and Jun and realized their expressions were almost identical. Pleading, hopeful, but guarded, not wanting to push too hard.

Maybe they were the same in that regard. Maybe they both needed him as much as he needed them.

He didn’t want to need Jun, but the pain of the past day had shown him that, at the moment, his heart at least wanted Jun. He felt confident that, if he needed to, he could still pull away. But… what if he could have this? What if Jun could be as steady a presence as Morgana, even after all these changes?

He wanted to try. So he nodded, even as he stood up and brushed wood chips from his pants. He glanced between the two before him, and signed. I’ll stay, at least for now.

Chapter Text

During the reunion of Akira’s little family, Minato had sat to the side, focusing on Koromaru. He kept an ear out, quietly, wanting to make sure everything was okay. But he only heard half the conversation, Jun’s half, since Akira seemed to be signing.

(At one point he heard a robotic voice, but the words didn’t sound like what Akira would say. They seemed directed at the kid. It was strange, but he decided not to worry about it.)

When Mr. Kashihara and Akira stood up, Morgana securely in Akira’s arms, he wandered over.

“Everything okay?” he asked, looking at both Mr. Kashihara and Akira.

Akira gave a shrug, then a nod. Mr. Kashihara sighed. “Well enough, for now. Thank you again, Arisato, for looking out for him.”

Minato nodded, hands casually in his pockets. “Akira, is any of your stuff still at the dorm?”

Akira shook his head. Minato quietly congratulated himself on helping the situation resolve. But there was one last matter.

“Mr. Kashihara. Can we talk tomorrow?”

The other woman approached the group, hanging near Mr. Kashihara. She gave him a sharp look, but Minato ignored it, focusing on his teacher.

“Of course. Does after classes work for you? I’d offer for us to both come in early, but I don’t know how long the talk will take.”

“After classes is fine,” he replied. “Later.”

And with that he walked off.

—

The next day, after classes, Minato followed Mr. Kashihara into an empty classroom. (Technically it was career experience week, so he had to come back from Wild Duck Burger to the school. But this conversation was important.)

Neither of them spoke until the door was closed and they'd both settled at desks.

The silence lasted for long moments, until Mr. Kashihara spoke up. “Should I start with my story?”

Minato fiddled with a lock of hair as he thought. “Did it have anything to do with the Kirijo Group?” he asked.

Jun frowned. “No… Why?”

Minato flapped a hand. “You go first. I'll go after.”

And Jun did go first. After gaining a promise not to tell anyone about it, he dove into the details. He skated over details, some, but he told a tale of two timelines, and of meddling entities called Philemon and Nyarlathotep. That was a lot, but Minato decided to mostly ignore the other timeline, focusing more on the conspiracy at the root of the Sumaru City Crisis.

As he listened, he debated how much he should share of his own story. How much he could share, when he felt like he knew so little at this point.

Finally, Mr. Kashihara finished his story. Silence fell once more, before Mr. Kashihara looked out the window and asked, “Does your story have anything to do with that extra hour at midnight?”

Minato, glad for somewhere to start, nodded. “We… recently realized we were wrong about a lot of things, and right now we don't really know…” He trailed off. Decided what to share. But Mr. Kashihara had shared his own story, and his story was in a way dangerous. If he was trusted with that, Minato could probably trust him in return.

So he shared about the Dark Hour, the sins of the Kirijo Group, and the way they'd all been manipulated by Ikutsuki. How everything had come to a head last month, when they thought everything was over, only to face betrayal. Mr. Kashihara looked worried, and partway through shifted over to place a comforting hand on Minato's shoulder.

He gave a ghost of a smile, and continued talking.

He didn't talk about Shinjiro. It was still too raw. He regretted the death of Mitsuru's father, mostly for how it affected her. But he didn't know the man. Shinjiro, on the other hand… Plus, it would involve sharing things about Ken that he doubted the boy wanted a stranger to know.

When he finally finished talking, Mr. Kashihara squeezed his shoulder. “Thank you for telling me, Arisato. And… if you, or your team, need a helping hand, or just advice or a listening ear, please come to me.”

His teacher's eyes went distant, then, for long moments. Minato finally asked, “What is it?”

Mr. Kashihara flashed an apologetic smile. “A few things. Mr. Ikutsuki had said some… odd things about Akira, trying to convince me not to move ahead in fostering him, a while back. It worries me, knowing what I now know, although with him… gone, we should be safe from that.”

Minato gave a shrug. Mr. Kashihara continued.

“I also noticed… you didn't mention the Velvet Room. It's still around right?”

And that made Minato's eyes widen. “Wait, you know the Velvet Room?” he asked.

“Of course,” Mr. Kashihara replied, bemused. “It's open to all Persona users. Where else would you manage your Personas?”

Minato shook his head. “I'm the only one on my team who can see it.”

“But then how do the others access new Personas?” Mr. Kashihara asked.

Minato shrugged. “They don't. Igor calls me a Wild Card. I'm the only one who can use other Personas.”

Mr. Kashihara frowned. “I guess that must be another change. Like your Evokers. In my time, you didn't need anything special to summon a Persona.”

Minato stayed silent, so Mr. Kashihara just gave a small smile. “I doubt it's important. If you're curious you could go to the Velvet Room. And… I may have someone to ask about that stuff too.”

The teacher got to his feet. “But, now that we've swapped stories, I wanted to say something else. I wanted to thank you for being my friend, and for your advice and encouragement with Akira. Your journey sounds like a hard one, and I’d like to help how I can, but I hope you don't lose sight of human connections along the way.”

Minato ducked his head a little. “I’ll… do my best,” he murmured. His friends were precious to him, even though the losses recently scared him and made him want to retreat mentally.

Suddenly, a hand was thrust into his vision, holding two flowers.

“Iris and Shion,” Jun said with a smile. “The game may be shutting down, and the game itself may have been… some sort of convoluted plot. But I don't regret remembering, and I especially don't regret our friendship there.

Minato took the flowers, holding them to his chest. Everything froze for a moment as he felt the power of the Hermit within him crest to its final tier. When it was over, though, he offered a small smile in return. “I don't regret it either. I'll keep your offer of help in mind.”

“That's all I can ask. But… I should be getting home to Akira now,” Mr. Kashihara said, standing and looking towards the door.

Minato nodded. “Say hi for me,” he said, a hint of a smile still lingering on his face.

Mr. Kashihara gave him a warm look and a farewell before they parted ways. Minato got to his feet, mind starting to drift to how to spend his evening. The next full moon was in a week or so. He didn't know what that would mean. But, with the knowledge that others had made it through things like this, he was willing to face forward and press onward.

Chapter Text

Morgana knows that Akira is quiet and stealthy. He always has been, and in the child that he is now, Morgana can sometimes see little glimpses of the Phantom Thieves' leader that he used to be. Nothing obvious, except for the few times Morgana has seen him find a mask to wear. Then, it's like all his carefully hidden rebellion just bursts out of him like a river overflowing its banks, and he's so much like he used to be that it hurts Morgana a little to watch.

The rest of the time, his stealth is just... something he's learned from the way he has to live now. Quiet, and withdrawn, and--

And this morning, when Morgana wakes up, Akira has already crept out of bed without him, leaving Morgana alone on top of the sheets Jun had bought for him that first week when Akira (and Morgana) had come here to stay.

Morgana has noticed that ever since Akira heard the real story of his history, Akira has slept on top of the blankets, with only the one Akechi had given him actually keeping him warm. He's taken several lengthy steps back , has cut himself off from using the things Jun had gotten for him, has stopped saying mine about any of the things he hadn't brought from foster care. In Akira's mind, it's not his bedroom, it's Jun's guest room. It's not his things inside, they're Jun's .

Jun had asked Morgana at one point whether Akira is being stubborn, or if this is something more, that they need to be worried about. And all Morgana had been able to do was shrug, and explain helplessly that he doesn't know. Akira isn't talking to him as much anymore. He used to talk to Morgana all the time, with his hands or with his body language or with the sounds Morgana has learned to parse because it's Akira making them. But ever since Akira ran away, he's closed himself off. Morgana really and honestly doesn't know how Akira's feeling, because Akira will not talk to him .

Morgana jumps off the bed and goes looking for Akira in the rest of the apartment, but finds it empty. He frowns, and rechecks every room. No Akira. No Jun. 

What's going on ?

Jun practices good apartment security, which means there are no open windows and--Morgana is a little ashamed to admit--it's a lot harder to sneak out of a place that doesn't have kids running in and out all the time. He's out of practice. 

He spends his day stuck in the apartment until finally Jun comes home.

"Finally!" Morgana says, the second he walks in the door. "Are you okay? Is Akira okay? You were both just gone when I woke up!"

"I thought you were with Akira," Jun says, looking honestly startled. "Don't you usually go to school in his bag?"

"Usually," Morgana agrees. "Yeah." His heart is sinking in his chest, because Jun honestly seems to have assumed Morgana was with Akira, but there's no way Akira had accidentally left him behind when he went to school. And he has never, not once, not in either world, been too busy or rushed or anything else to make sure Morgana was with him. 

Morgana realizes he'd been left behind intentionally.

"It's okay," he assures Jun, lying hard because he so desperately wants this to be true. "Everyone needs their space sometimes."

"So he's done this before?" Jun asks, and because he's concerned for Akira too, Morgana has to shake his head no. "He's never left me behind unless he had to," he explains. "That's why I was so worried when I woke up and neither of you were here. It's not like him."

"He's really upset," Jun remarks neutrally.

"He's never done this before," Morgana says. He's quiet for a few seconds, then in a voice so soft he's not sure if Jun will even be able to hear him, he says, " I left once. In the old timeline. I got in an argument with another one of our friends, and I walked out. It worked out okay, because if I hadn't done that, we might not have recruited one of our other teammates." It's been a long time since he had anyone else to talk to about the Phantom Thieves.

Morgana tries not to think about how hard it is to remember their faces, after all this time. He remembers the more important things--their determination to fight, their bravery, their easy teamwork when they went into a Palace to fight. 

(Their fear when they'd disappeared)

"And I'm glad we got Haru on the team," Morgana continues, shoving that away. It's not going to help him or Akira for him to be worrying about... about people that are too far gone to help. "But I shouldn't have walked out." He tries to smile at Jun. "I was so mad at the time, but I wish I could still argue with that teammate I was mad at. Akira's the only person I have left, and now he's the one leaving me."

Jun sighs. "He's allowed to be upset with us," he says. "This is a lot for him to have to get used to all at once. I know it's not the same, but when we all found out that Akira wasn't really a baby back in Sumaru, it was strange to have to recontextualize everything we knew about him." His frown deepens. "And we hadn't even known him for that long. Akira has known himself for almost ten years, and now he has to figure out how he feels about finding out he lived a whole life he doesn't remember. And you've told me that you had amnesia. I forgot my friends and my Persona. It's not hard to understand why he's having a hard time."

"I know," Morgana says. "But he's my friend, and he thinks I hurt him." His tail lashes, reflecting--more than he wants it to--how upset he is. "Maybe I did hurt him. But I didn't think it would help if I told him earlier! I just wanted to be there with him. He's my friend."

Telling him earlier wouldn't have helped, Morgana insists to himself. Akira has come a long way since Morgana first met him. He's a better communicator, in a more stable living situation, more sure of himself. He still has his struggles, but Morgana can't imagine how Akira would have reacted to this two or three years ago. He might not have even believed it, or maybe understood it. 

"Sometimes friends hurt each other," Jun says. "I know I've hurt mine."

"That's different ," Morgana says, and Jun politely doesn't argue. "And if I did hurt Akira, I didn't want to. I just... didn't want to hurt him more. I wanted to be there for him, and telling him felt..."

There were no good, simple options. 

Morgana had tried to do good anyway. And he thinks he's helped Akira by being there.

(But then, if he'd helped, should Akira still be mad at him?)

"Give him some time and space," Jun says. "I'm sure he doesn't want to stop being your friend. He just has a lot to process."

And it's not like Morgana has a choice right now anyway. Akira isn't here, and Morgana doesn't know where he is. Part of him wants to go running out into town and check all of Akira's usual haunts, but he doesn't. Partly because Jun keeps reminding him that Akira needs and deserves his space, and partly because Morgana suspects that Akira will already have thought about how well Morgana knows him, and will be staying away from the places he usually goes after school.

He can tell Jun is a little on edge too, especially as it starts to get a little dark out, and Akira still isn't back. He's run away once, and both of them know that he's fully capable of doing it again. Maybe leaving Morgana behind had been his first step in covering his tracks.

But Akira walks in just as the streetlights are coming on outside, skating close to being so late he would have had to explain where he's been, without quite crossing the line. 

"Welcome back," Jun says.

Morgana jumps off the counter where he's been offering unasked for (but politely tolerated) commentary on what Jun's working on for dinner and paces up to Akira, looking anxiously up to him, watching his face. 

Akira smiles, but it's vague and distant, and he passes Morgana without so much as a gesture. 

Oh.

He's definitely still upset.

Morgana doesn't have a chance to be one on one with Akira until Akira's supposed to be getting ready for bed. Akira just doesn't seem interested, and every time Morgana tries to get close, Akira suddenly has something else he needs to do or somewhere else in the apartment where he needs to be. That's why Morgana is able to corner him at bedtime--he's completely out of places to run to.

Still, he doesn't look at Morgana as he gets ready for bed, avoiding his gaze even when he can't avoid him physically. And when Morgana tries to force the issue by jumping up onto Akira's bed, Akira's mouth twists and he finally-- finally --signs something to Morgana. 

"You can go sleep in Jun's room if you want. You don't have to stay with me."

"No way!" Morgana protests. "Why wouldn't I want to be with you?"

Akira obviously can't understand him, but he seems to understand exactly what Morgana is saying just from a glance at his body language. "Everyone leaves eventually," he says.

It's something Morgana has seen Akira say more than once, and he seems to really believe it, which hurts Morgana, because he remembers the easy way Akira used to be able to believe in people. Even after his arrest. Even after everyone treated him like a delinquent. He'd still taken so much strength from his bonds.

Morgana has been so busy worrying about Akira's attitude toward the other people in his life, that he's never really considered that Akira might think Morgana is one of those people that he believes is going to leave. Of course he's not. He'd spent years trying to find him, and Akira is his friend . 

"Not me," he says. "Akira, I'm not going to leave you."

"You have people you can talk to," Akira says, looking away again. "You don't have to spend time with me anymore. It's okay."

"Akira..." Morgana doesn't leave. He pads closer to her across the bed. "I'm not going to leave."

"Everyone..." Akira's hands are shaking. He has to pause, clenching them into fists to steady himself. When he can sign again, he repeats, "Everyone leaves."

Morgana doesn't say anything this time. But when Akira sits down on the bed, Morgana lays next to him, stubbornly refusing to go absolutely anywhere. Neither of them says anything else, and Morgana is sure that Akira's thinking a lot more than he's saying. It's going to take more than this to make things go back to the way they were before, and Morgana's heart aches with that.

"--don't even want to be with me," Akira signs. The movements are so small that Morgana misses the first half of the sentence. "You just want the Akira that used to exist."

It's not true. But it's so complicated, so tangled up and hard , that Morgana doesn't think he can possibly explain. Even if Akira could really understand him, he doesn't think he could say it right. Instead, he just curls up against Akira's side, and presses himself against him as hard as he can.

Chapter Text

In the days after finding out that Jun is actually Joker, and therefore a different person, Akira has a lot of feelings that he doesn’t know how to handle. He’s not… used to feeling things like this, because it’s usually so much easier to stuff it deep down and ignore it. And these feelings especially are painful. Every time he thinks too hard about Jun, he starts to feel this fluttery, panicked feeling inside his chest that’s a little bit like being sick, or like falling, and even though he’s not actively planning to run away again, he doesn’t feel okay.

Jun hasn’t done anything bad yet. He’s been on his best behavior, but Akira is still waiting for the other shoe to drop. Because there are differences. Jun keeps checking on him, more than he ever has before. And sure, Akira had run away, but he’s back now. And there’s something funny in the way Jun looks at him, like he needs Akira to be where he’d left him. And he’d never looked at Akira like that before.

Nobody has ever looked at Akira like that before. 

And then there’s all the phone calls he’s been having with old friends. The odd look he sometimes gives Akira’s Featherman mask. The way he sometimes rubs his fingers over his watch, and frowns at it like it’s disappointed him.

Akira watches him, all the time, weighing up these changes and a hundred other little ones he sees, trying to just understand this new Jun. There has to be a twist coming, he knows. The other shoe will drop sooner or later, and he’s bracing as best as he can for that, but until it happens he doesn’t really know for sure who this new Jun is. Just that he’s different.

And different could mean a lot of things. It could mean he’s more like Joker than he claims he is. It could mean that he doesn’t want Akira anymore. It could mean that sooner or later, he’s going to give Akira back to his dad . For days and days, Akira worries over these possibilities. He zones out at school, sleeps badly, and writes letters to Goro that he knows he’ll never send.

(He wishes he could)

(It would be nice to be able to talk to his friend about all the horrible feelings he can’t stop, but how does he explain this? And what would Jun do if he tried?)

He can’t talk to Morgana, either. Even though he knows for sure that Morgana can understand him, Morgana is also biased . Morgana likes Jun, and wants Akira to like Jun too. He’s not going to want to hear that Akira can’t make himself feel sure that Jun is still… Jun.

(That Akira desperately wants him to still be Jun, but can’t make himself fell 100% sure yet)

So instead, he decides to force the issue.

If Jun wants to act like things are still okay and normal, and doesn’t want to show him how he’s changed, and what he’s really like now, Akira will make him. He’s had enough group homes and guardians to know what adults are like, and to know that the way to make them stop pretending to be nice is to get them angry. He’s seen adults that act nice scream at kids that break things or make a mess. He’s seen them swear--sometimes at the kids, sometimes not--when kids get into fights or make trouble at school. 

So if he wants to know what Jun is really like, Akira is going to have to go out of his way to make Jun mad at him. If the other shoe isn’t going to drop on its own, he’s just going to have to steal it himself.

…he starts by stealing Jun’s shoes.

Not all of them, obviously. That would be too obvious. But the nice pair he usually wears to work. He waits until both Jun and Morgana are distracted (not cluing Morgana in feels weird, but Morgana will tell Jun), then steals Jun’s work shoes out of the entry and stuffs them under the bed in the guestroom. Jun doesn’t notice until the next morning, and after Akira shakes his head no, he hasn’t seen them, he searches all around the entryway before giving up and going to find an old pair in his room.

“I’m sure they’ll turn up,” he tells Akira, as he ushers him out the door for work and school. He isn’t mad at all.

So Akira escalates. The next evening, after dinner, he volunteers to help with the dishes without being asked. It’s the first time Akira’s willingly spent time with Jun since the horrible day when he got his memories back. And almost the first time he’s eaten with him, too. It feels--he wants it to feel nice, but Akira very sternly reminds himself that he can’t let his guard down until he really knows who Jun is. Instead, he lets Jun make cheerful conversation while he bows his head and focuses on the dishes.

Then he drops one.

It falls to the ground and shatters into a dozen shards around his feet. Akira immediately looks up at Jun, daring him to get angry.

“Don’t move,” Jun says. “Wait there, you’re not wearing socks and you’ll cut your feet.”

He still doesn’t get angry, although he does pause when he comes back with the broom and dustpan and sees Akira still staring at him.

“What’s wrong?” he asks.

Akira just shakes his head, ignores Jun’s instruction to stay still, hops over the shattered dish, and goes to the guest room to scheme. Morgana follows him, meowing urgently, but… well, it’s not like Akira knows what he’s saying, anyway.

That weekend, he goes to a convenience store he knows has cameras and an especially nasty owner. He doesn’t bother to hide it when he shoves a packet of gum into his hoodie pocket (Morgana makes an obviously confused mrow? kind of noise, because he knows Akira is a better thief than this), and so of course he’s caught right away. He gets a lecture that’s worse than he’d expected when he came up with this plan, and then the owner demands the phone number of Akira’s parents so he can call them and keep going with his lecture about irresponsible kids.

Akira gives him Jun’s number without any protest, writing it down on a piece of paper he’d already had ready for exactly this, and then waits for Jun to get the call, hear the whole story, and then get ranted at by the owner, who seems to only be getting angrier, if anything.

When Jun eventually turns to him, his expression confused and--and a little disappointed, Akira steels himself and just glares back.

Come on, he thinks. Get mad.

But Jun just asks, “What happened here, Akira?”

Akira stuffs his hands into the pocket of his hoodie, pointedly refusing to say anything. Jun just looks more confused,  and when he finally gets Akira out of the shop, he says, “You really shouldn’t be doing that, Akira.”

Akira doesn’t say anything. His hands stay still. 

“I understand you’ve been going through a lot lately,” Jun continues. “And the things that have happened would be hard for anyone.” He takes a deep breath. “But Akira, you can’t just steal from people. I know you don’t want to ask me for anything right now, and I’m going to try hard to earn your trust back. So for right now, if you need something, maybe we can work out a trade. You can do chores or something in exchange, how does that sound?”

It sounds like Jun is completely missing the point. Akira scowls at him and walks a little faster, so he won’t have to look at Jun the rest of the way home.

-//-

Jun is starting to feel seriously concerned about Akira. When they first got him home, he’d thought that things were going to be okay again. Maybe even better, now that he understands where he’d gotten that protective instinct toward Akira that sleeps in his chest like an angry beast. There is a time in his life when he’d believed--well, he’d believed a lot of horrible lies. And Akira had been a bright spot in all of that, if for no other reason than because he’d been so blatantly out of place in the life he was living as Joker.

Even as a teenager, Jun would have fought for Akira’s safety and happiness, if he’d been given half a chance. Now that he’s an adult, he is determined to do that.

And Akira seems just as determined not to let him. He seems to be going out of his way to butt heads with Jun, breaking rules and causing trouble at every chance he gets. And almost every time he does something--when he makes a mess in the apartment, or acts out in school, or stays out past his curfew--he’ll look up at Jun with a stubborn, challenging expression that makes Jun’s heart ache. He doesn’t want to see Akira looking at him like that. Like he’s an enemy worth standing up to. 

He so, so badly wants them to be a family. 

There are things he can’t say to Akira anymore. He can’t make jokes because Akira has gotten serious, and stopped laughing. He can’t call Akira by the little terms of endearment that used to slip out so easily, because Akira bristles and makes it clear that he doesn’t want to be dear to Jun. And he definitely can’t do what he increasingly wants to, which is shake Akira by the shoulders until he gets it through his head that Jun is trying hard to love him.

Since he can’t do any of that, he just takes deep breaths and keeps being calm and clear when he talks to Akira, communicating the way Akira’s actions make him feel, setting rules, and occasionally sending him to his room or telling him to come straight home after school when he insists on breaking them anyway.

So far, it hasn’t made much of a difference.

“He’s just scared, I think,” Morgana says one afternoon, when Akira has shut himself up in his room to work on homework. “But… I don’t know for sure.”

“Scared of me?” Jun asks.

Morgana nods reluctantly, but then adds, “I don’t think it’s just you, though. It’s a little bit of everything, you know?”

“He’s going to have to get used to it eventually,” Jun says, but it’s a slightly hopeless comment. It’s been a couple weeks already. If anything, Akira’s rulebreaking has only gotten worse, and he’s so… angry .

And nothing proves that point quite as painfully as when Maya brings Katsuya to visit. Jun makes a point of telling Akira they’ll be there when he gets home from school. He even tells Akira that he doesn’t have to be there if he doesn’t want to, that he can stay at his school library for a while. Akira nods, and then he glowers, and he comes home anyway.

(Jun doesn't know why he's surprised, at this point, that Akira doesn't listen to him)

He must have made a beeline straight home after school, in fact, because he gets there early. Jun had taken a vacation day, to make sure he’d be home in time to greet Katsuya when he arrives. And when Akira walks in, his usual challenging expression set in his face like it’s been carved into stone, Jun sighs and knows this evening has just gotten more difficult than he’d wanted it to be.

“My friends will be here soon,” he reminds Akira.

Akira frowns at him for several seconds, then asks, “Do you want me to leave?”

“No,” Jun says quickly. “Of course not. I just thought you might not be comfortable meeting them, since…” He dithers, picking his words carefully, but isn’t sure there are any words Akira is going to want to hear. “They knew you as a baby. I know that’s not something you want to talk about.”

“I don’t.”

Then why is he here , Jun badly wants to ask. But he bites back his frustration, because Akira already looks like he’s ready for an argument. Instead he says, “I know you don’t want to talk about that--”

“I don’t.”

Jun takes a deep breath, and forges on. “But these people are a part of my past. I don’t want you to feel excluded, but I do want to talk to them.” Maya is the only friend from back then that still remembers, but Jun does want to see the others. He’s heard Morgana’s account, but still feels like he has so many questions. He’d missed something, by forgetting back then, and he’ll never be able to reclaim that.

Still, he wants to talk. To know more of what he’s missed.

“I don’t want you to leave,” he tells Akira. “You’re always, always welcome here. But I don’t want you to have to be around something that hurts you. If you need to be somewhere else for an hour or two, that is completely fine.”

He waits, but after a long pause, Akira just shrugs and goes back to his room. Jun watches him go, and tries not to feel a curling foreboding nesting its way into his gut.

But for a while, everything goes fine. Maya arrives with Katsuya right on time, and formally introduces Jun and Katsuya to each other. They’ve met a few times, of course, but only peripherally, and rarely in this timeline. Jun has a vague memory of seeing him on the airship, but his attention had been pointed in other directions back then. 

Katsuya now is a tired man, with a lined face that makes him look older than he is. Still, he smiles genuinely at Jun when they meet, and asks after Akira with real concern. Jun is inclined to trust people that want to help Akira, of course, and soon the three of them are talking easily. Jun loses track of time a little as they all compare stories. He’s spoken to Maya several times by now, and she’d driven straight here after he remembered and called her, but Katsuya explains that he’d left the police several years ago.

“I didn’t like the way they handled the aftereffects of… everything that happened,” he explains. “Especially when Akira--”

But he stops, because before he can get into the horrible mismanagement of Akira’s custody, Akira himself appears. Jun hadn’t heard him leave his room, so he must be making an effort to stay quiet. He’s halfway between his room and the bathroom, but had tripped a little when he heard his name. 

Jun forces a smile and says, “This is Akira, of course.” He tries to say it casually, so that Akira won’t feel like he has to stop what he’s doing and get involved in the conversation, but it doesn’t work. 

Katsuya has startled forward as soon as he saw Akira, and he says, “It really is you. I’m sure you don’t remember me, but I took care of you for a while when you were younger. And I’m happy to see you’re doing alright.”

For a long moment, it looks like Akira just isn’t going to answer. Jun has gotten used to seeing his expression locked into that angry, rebellious look that he’s been wearing so often lately, but as soon as Katsuya mentions knowing him when he was younger, that expression collapses into something hurt. And when he answers, hands flashing out into sharp, quick sentences, he says, “You took care of me? You didn’t do a very good job.”

“Akira!” Jun says, too shocked to say anything else.

Maya seems to recognize Jun’s tone more than Akira’s body language, and shoots him a sharp look. She doesn’t ask any questions though, which Jun is grateful for because he’s still watching Akira’s hands. He doesn’t say anything else though, just shrugs and turns his back on the group of adults. 

When he’s gone, Katsuya asks, “What did he say?”

His tone is completely calm. The calm, Jun thinks, is the distant detachment of someone that has had to learn not to care. 

“It wasn’t anything important,” Jun says awkwardly. Even if Akira doesn’t want to think about his time with Katsuya, Jun is grateful that he’d tried. Akira hasn’t had very many stable adults in his life, but from what Jun’s heard, Katsuya had tried, and he had cared.

“No,” Katsuya says. “Tell me, what did he say?”

Jun decides not to keep arguing. Katsuya must already know the general tone of what Akira’s comment had been. Akira hadn’t bothered to hide his tone, and Jun’s reaction is a kind of confirmation itself. “He just said… it could have gone better,” he says, softening Akira’s words as much as he can.

“Hmm,” Katsuya says.

The conversation never really bounces back, after that.

Later, when Katsuya and Maya have said goodbye and left, Jun goes to find Akira. He knocks on his bedroom door, waits for the reluctant sound of Akira signalling he can come in, then opens the door and stands with his arms crossed, leaning against the frame. Akira is sitting on his bed, wrapped in his friend’s blanket, balancing a textbook and a pad of paper on his knees. The room is impeccably neat, and Jun can’t help noticing all the ways Akira has put things away, or moved them back to the way they were before he moved in. As close as possible, he’s put it back to the way it had looked when it was just a guest room.

“Akira…” he says, and then stops because he doesn’t know what to say next.

Akira puts down a pencil and asks, “Are you mad?”

A few minutes ago, probably. But now, standing at the border of this room Akira seems to be slowly editing himself out of, the only emotion Jun can make himself feel is sad. “No,” he says quietly. “I’m just… disappointed.”

Akira makes a face.

“I know how that sounds,” Jun says. “But I mean it. Katsuya didn’t deserve that. He did nothing to hurt you, and you’ve hurt him extremely badly.”

Akira hesitates. Jun is oddly almost reassured by the flash of guilt he catches on Akira’s face. He knows what he’s done is wrong, at least. 

“I’m going to leave his address on the table,” Jun says. “I think it would be nice if you wrote an apology note.”

Akira stares down at his toes, and won’t meet Jun’s gaze. “I’m sorry,” he says.

Maybe he realizes he’s crossed a line. Jun decides not to push it any further, because this is the closest Akira’s come to a reasonable conversation in a while. He leaves Akira to--hopefully--write the apology letter, and feels calmer than he has in days.

-//-

Akira is starting to doubt his entire plan. Jun just isn’t going to get angry. Akira has pushed and pushed in as many ways as he can think of, braced and waiting for the other shoe to drop. And if Jun isn’t going to get mad, and act like a different person, that’s… good. Isn’t it? It’s what he wants?

It should be, but he can’t make himself relax. As much as he wants to believe that Jun is okay, and that he hasn’t changed into a totally different person, it’s hard . His mind wants to believe, but his body can’t. He stays tense and unhappy, and his face does that thing it always does when he’s scared, where it twists up and smiles and just…

(It had been easier when he was trying to provoke Jun into being angry)

(When he was doing something, and had someone to fight against, he hadn’t felt like he needed to fall back on smiling)

He just feels kind of distant now. Disconnected from Jun, because he’d never gotten to really find out how different Jun is now. Disconnected from Morgana, because he’s the only one in the apartment that can’t understand him speaking, and every conversation Morgana and Jun have makes Akira feel a little more squeezed out. And even disconnected from himself, because he can’t make himself feel the way he wants to about this.

And then one day he gets back to Jun’s apartment after school, and Jun himself is waiting for him.

Akira nods when Jun says hello, and smiles, and bends down to take off his shoes. He takes his time, kind of hoping Jun will move on by the time he’s done. That doesn’t happen, though, and when Akira reluctantly looks up, he sees that Jun seems to be waiting for him.

“Akira,” Jun says. “There’s something we need to talk about.”

He gestures for Akira to follow him to the table, and Akira does, reluctantly. When he’s perched on the edge of the chair he usually sits at for meals, Jun says, “Akira, I just… I want to let you know that I got a letter from child services today. I’ve hit a little bit of a snag with the adoption process. It’s nothing to worry about, I am going to figure it out, but there’s a chance you might have to be interviewed, or give a statement. I didn’t want to spring it on you when it actually happens, but it’s very much not going to be a problem.”

Akira laughs. A choked little noise, but--of course. It’s about time. If anything, he’s probably overdue. His paperwork always gets messed up, and he always gets moved somewhere else. At least he won’t have to--to worry about Jun anymore. It won’t be any of his business after this what Jun is like or not like. “This always happens,” he tells Jun, standing up. “It’s okay. It’s not your fault.”

“Akira--”

He smiles. His face hurts, but he shrugs it off and goes back to Jun’s guest room. Most of his stuff is already packed away anyway, he doesn’t want to take up too much space after everything, but there are essentials he’ll need to pack before he leaves.

“Hey,” Jun says, and there’s a rough sound of his chair scraping on tile, then footsteps. “Akira, it’s just a little bit of paperwork.”

Akira ignores him. It doesn’t matter anymore. He doesn’t have to figure out how Jun had changed. He just has to get back to… to normal. It won’t be hard to get used to it just being him and Morgana again, and watching his own back. Just like always. It’ll be fine.

He pulls his backpack out and--

“ Akira !”

He stops, startled, and looks up at Jun.

“What are you doing?” Jun demands. “You’re not running away again?”

Oh. Of course he’d be worried about that. Akira puts his bag on his bed so he can explain, “Not running away. I’m just getting ready for when I go to the next foster home.”

“You’re not going back to a foster home,” Jun says. “Not ever , Akira. Do you understand me?”

“It’s okay,” Akira says. “It’s not your fault. This just always happens. My paperwork gets messed up, and then I have to be moved somewhere else.”

“Not this time,” Jun says.

Akira shrugs.

“ Akira .”

It doesn’t matter. He’ll be gone in a few days, or a couple of weeks if he’s lucky, and it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t matter . It’ll be better this way. He’ll still have Morgana, and he won’t see Jun again, and it’ll be… fine.

He’s staring down at his bag, smiling and trying to make himself calm down, when he hears Jun striding toward him.

“Akira,” he says. “ Look at me.”

The force and volume of the words startle Akira into looking up, and when he meets Jun’s gaze, his expression is…

It’s angry.

“Is that really what you think of me?” Jun demands. “I know things have been rough lately, but I want to know what exactly I did that makes you think I’m going to give up on you.”

Akira’s mouth falls open, smile shattering in the face of Jun’s anger. Jun’s voice is raised. Not shouting, but louder than usual. And his eyes are bright , boring into Akira. 

“I am not going to let you go,” Jun says. “Not like this. Not because of some pointless mess up with your paperwork. Akira, do you really think I’m not going to do whatever it takes to get that figured out? Do you think I wouldn’t fight harder for you, against worse things, if that’s what it takes to make sure you’re safe?”

Akira half lifts his hands, but doesn’t know what he wants to say, so they just hover at chest level, confused and… and weirdly hopeful. Something small and bright is lighting up inside him, something he barely recognizes. Like the first time he’d seen Morgana, almost. Not exactly the same, because Morgana is Morgana , but…

But it turns out that Jun is Jun .

And this is the only thing that has made Jun angry, after weeks of effort, despite Akira desperately trying everything he can possibly think of. In the end, the only thing that had been enough is when Akira was ready to stop believing in him.

Akira chokes out a sob, and jerks forward, wrapping his arms around Jun’s waist, almost sobbing. He’s finally seen it for himself. This anger he’s been waiting all this time to find, and it’s not something that’s turned against him. Even though Jun had raised his voice, had shown how angry he is very, very clearly on his face, it hadn’t been anger pointed at Akira.

“Akira,” Jun says, and all the anger is gone now. Faded away, and that’s fine, because Akira’s seen everything he needs to know. “What…?”

But Akira just cries, and doesn’t let go, and a fragile something inside him starts to open up. A tiny seed of hope .

Because Jun’s anger is never going to hurt him. And if Jun has changed at all, it’s not in any way that Akira’s been afraid of.

Jun’s anger is for him. And Jun, Akira can finally let himself believe, is going to protect him. Akira cries and cries, until somehow he ends up sitting on his bed, still pressed tight into Jun’s side, breathing in ragged, tired gasps as Jun holds him, and pets his hard in a steady, soothing movement. 

Nothing has changed, technically. Jun has still remembered terrible things that Akira never wants to know about. And Akira is still going to have to figure out how to live with a Jun that knows him from back when he’d been someone else. It’s going to take some time to get back to normal. But Akira is going to get there, eventually, and Jun is going to fight for him while he’s trying.

Chapter Text

Akira is nine years old, and for most of his life he's gone in and out of different foster homes once every year or so. He had been constantly around new kids, at the foster homes and at school, and also he avoids doctors like the plague. Actually, he would probably avoid doctors even if he had the  actual plague. He hates doctors.

So he gets sick a lot, and when he opens his eyes this morning and feels crusty and cold and gross , he knows right away that today is a sick day. Today, he's going to go to school and sit with his chin in his hands, struggling to stay awake, miserable and foggy headed. If he's lucky he won't get in trouble for not paying attention, but he probably will, because he feels awful .

And anyway, when has he ever been lucky?

Akira doesn't want to leave the warm little cave of his blankets, but he pushes the covers off and stumbles out of bed, already shivering before he even takes his pajamas off. Morgana meows something he thinks is probably concerned, but since Akira can't understand him anyway and doesn't have enough energy to have a whole argument, he just blows a halfhearted raspberry and ignores this. He puts his uniform on, slowly because every muscle aches, and shuffles into the kitchen. 

"Good morning," Jun says, and turns around to look at Akira. He's half raised his hands to sign a greeting, but before he has a chance, Jun asks, "Why aren't you in bed?"

Akira stops, mid-sign, and squints at Jun in confusion. Why would he be in bed? "It's a school day," he says. "I have to go to school."

"You look awful," Jun says. He takes a step forward, then stops. "Can I feel your forehead?"

"Why?"

"To check your temperature."

Akira only feels more confused. He wants to ask if Jun is going to check his forehead temperature with a thermometer, but doesn't know if Jun knows the sign for that, and doesn't feel like going through the effort to spell the whole word out. It's long and he's tired . So he just shrugs, giving Jun permission to do what he wants, and is confused when Jun reaches out to touch the back of his hand to Akira's forehead. He just... rests it there. Akira is surprised, like he always is, at how easily Jun touches him. Not in a weird way or anything, just like he cares.

"You are burning up," Jun says, his voice gentle. "Turn around, go back to bed."

"School," Akira protests again, even though he doesn’t make any move to pull his head back from Jun’s hand. It feels nice and cool against his head.

"I'll let them know you're not coming," Jun says, and Akira realizes with another shock that he's getting a sick day. Sick days don't happen to kids like him. Sick days are for kids with parents. Not for kids in foster care, with state appointed guardians that want them out of the house, or are hoping everything will be okay, and they won't have to find the time to drag one kid to the doctor's visit they're required to make for any kid that misses school.

(Especially when that kid is him, and they know he's just going to bite)

"Go back to bed," Jun says, and this time Akira does. He doesn't even bother taking off his clothes, just burrows into bed under the covers. He feels bad getting Goro's present gross and germy, but he's just so cold, and even with his uniform jacket on, and two blankets, he can't stop shivering.

Morgana jumps up onto the bed, concern all over his face, and the two of them look at each other for a long moment. Things have been rocky since Akira ran away and came back. Sometimes, when he thinks too much about the worst parts of what he's been told, he'll turn around in bed so his back is to Morgana, and fall asleep with his arms empty. But today he just feels awful, and he wants his friend, so he braces himself against the cold and lifts the blankets a little so Morgana can crawl underneath with him, if he wants.

It turns out Morgana does. He cuddles against Akira's chest, and Akira wraps his arms around him and curls himself into a ball with his face pressed into Morgana's fur, close enough to hide the miserable whine that comes snaking out of him. That triggers a coughing fit, his chest rattling with the effort of it, and at the end Akira is too tired and sad and achy to do anything but curl up tighter and ride out the worst of it. He closes his eyes, and vaguely drifts off to sleep.

-//-

Jun calls Akira out sick. Then he calls out sick himself, and goes to check on him. He knocks, and isn't surprised when he doesn't get the usual knock in response. Akira might already be asleep, or too out of it to answer. So just this once, he opens the door a crack and pokes his head inside. "Akira?" he asks.

Akira doesn't answer, but Morgana pops out of the mess of blankets in the middle of the bed, and whispers, "I think he's sleeping."

Jun nods, and pads as softly as he can over to the two of them. Akira has buried himself in blankets so deeply his face isn't even visible, so Jun pulls them down just a little to make sure he can still breathe. Akira's face, when it's visible, squints up in protest, and a shiver wracks his body.

"He seemed a little out of it last night," he says. "But I thought he was just tired."

"Kids get sick a lot ," Morgana says. "I didn't realize, when all my friends were teenagers..."

He trails off, and Jun doesn't blame him. The old timeline is a touchy subject, and there's no point turning this into a fight if Akira wakes up and hears Jun's side of the conversation. 

"He'll get better," Morgana assures him. "He just needs a few days of rest."

"I think we can do better than that," Jun says. "Rest is important, but so is going to the doctor, medicine, hydrating..."

"He won't want to go to the doctor," Morgana says. 

This is probably true. Jun has heard stories. He knows enough of his history. "I'll leave it for a last resort," he says. "But I'm not going to just... leave him alone until he's better." That's not what an adult who is responsible for a child does. His parents never had. Not in this timeline, at least. And in the last one...

His stomach twists uncomfortably.

Even in the other one, when his father-- hadn't been, he'd still stayed home with Jun when he was sick. An act? Manipulation? Jun has no idea, and never will, but the point is that even an eldritch monster trying to destroy humanity had understood on some level that children can't just be expected to spontaneously get better on their own. 

He goes to make soup. 

-//-

The next time Akira blinks himself awake, it's to the sound of the bedroom door opening. He pulls his face away from Morgana, feeling guilty at the crust of gross that had dripped and dried there, and looks up at Jun. His throat is dry from breathing through his mouth while he'd been asleep, and his nose feels like a clogged pipe. 

He doesn't want to pull his arms away from the warmth of Morgana and his blankets to sign, so he just looks at the bowl Jun is carrying, and then at Jun, and hopes Jun understands the question.

Luckily it seems to be the obvious one, because Jun says, "It's soup. Mostly broth." He puts it down on the desk next to Akira's bed, and adds, "I'll be right back with some water, too. You need to make sure you stay hydrated."

Akira stares numbly at him. Jun leaves. Comes back. He's carrying a cup with a straw in one hand, and in the other, he has a package of saltines. He puts both of them down, and leaves again.

When the door's closed, Akira drags himself up, keeping the blankets bunched around him, and takes the water. The straw makes it easier on his sore throat, and he drinks water until it feels like he might just throw it up if he keeps going. He's only had about a third of a cup, but he puts the water back down and looks at the soup.

His stomach churns. He still isn't used enough to having food whenever he wants it, to feel good about ignoring soup that Jun had actually made for him. But he doesn't think he can eat anything right now, even broth. And soup won't last, he can't just squirrel it away for later.

He can take the crackers, though. He doesn't want to get out of bed and put them in one of his usual hiding spots, so he just snakes his hand out of the blankets, grabs the crackers, and hides them under his pillow. He can eat them later, even if Jun doesn't bring more soup. 

Akira drifts off again.

-//-

Akira doesn't eat anything that first day--Jun takes away the soup bowl, still full, and notes both the missing crackers and the corner of packaging poking out from under Akira's pillow. Normally he's better at hiding his stolen snacks, and this as much as anything else tells Jun how sick he must be. He sighs, and gives the sleeve of saltines a little push, farther under the pillow. He'd left them here for Akira to grab and save for later, after all. If this is what takes it to get himher to eat, that's what it takes.

The movement jostles Akira a little, and he whines, high pitched and pitiful. Jun pauses, and leans down to brush his sweaty hair out of his face. That seems to help, a little, so Jun keeps doing it. He remembers that Akira had seemed to like it at the summer festival when Jun had brushed his hair back, so he does it now, hoping it'll help.

Akira twitches. Jun's fingers slip back toward his neck. 

Immediately, Akira's eyes fly open, he jerks forward and vomits water and bile onto the floor, his whole body spasming with the movement.

"It's okay, Akira," Jun says, pulling his hands back. "I'm sorry, it was an accident. I didn't mean to touch back there." He knows that's the worst place he could have touched Akira, knows that he has scars there that are more than physical, and he never would have touched on purpose. Especially when Akira so obviously already feels bad, and every nerve in his body is probably raw and tense from fighting whatever bug he’s picked up.

Akira, panting and pale, pulls back and stares at him. Then he signs, his hands trembling a little, "Hurts."

  "I know, sweetie," Jun sighs. "I'm sorry. 

"Everything hurts," Akira says miserably. "Neck..."

He shrugs awkwardly, one shoulder going up and then down in a sharp little bob. But then he squirms down into the blankets, and even if he's not exactly close to Jun, he's... closer . 

Jun goes to get rags and disinfectant. He cleans up the vomit, and washes his hands, and is coming back to check if Akira needs anything else, when Akira makes a soft noise from the bed, and reaches out for Jun's wrist. 

Something about this feels... Familiar. But Jun can't place it immediately, so he pushes the worry away and focuses on Akira, and the visible hurt clouding his eyes.

"Do you need something?" Jun asks. He's still busy feeling terrible about accidentally touching the back of Akira's neck, and is ready to do whatever Akira needs to feel better about him again. 

Akira squeezes his eyes closed, then opens them and pulls Jun's hand to his forehead, looking up at him with eyes that are asking a question Jun can barely believe. But no--it really seems like Akira is asking for Jun to go back to stroking his hair, the way he had been before. 

Jun sits on the bed next to him, his fingers gently, carefully stroking Akira's hair. 

-//-

It feels selfish to even ask for Jun to keep touching him like this. Especially after Akira had just thrown up all over Jun and his floor. But it feels so nice. He feels so... so wanted . When Jun smooths his hair back, fingers gentle and soothing. When he makes him soup even though Akira can't eat it right now. When he cleans up his puke, and still sits here and says nice things and calls him sweetie, just like Akira is a kid he really actually wants to keep.

Akira has never been a kid that anyone wanted.

He'd run away. He'd heard Jun's story, and run away, and Jun is still doing all of this for him. For him . Not for the old Akira that doesn't exist anymore, but for the Akira that exists right now, shivering and miserable with snot leaking out of his nose and the taste of bile in the back of his throat. The worst possible version of him, and still Jun runs his thumb over Akira sweaty forehead, over and over in that steady, soothing, almost loving motion, until it finally lulls him to sleep.

-//-

It doesn't hit Jun until after Akira falls asleep. Why that moment when Akira grabbed his wrist had felt so familiar. Why his chest had ached when he pulled him closer instead of pushing him away. Back in Sumaru, in the memory pools, they'd watched a teenage Akira curled up in bed, bruised and bleeding, not sick but hurt, watched him reach out just like that for comfort from someone that must have been like a father to him, for that memory to be there at all. 

And yes, that memory had ended with Akira desperately reaching for the man, demanding a hug more than asking, and all Jun can do in the here and now is card his fingers through Akira's hair, being more careful now to avoid his neck. 

But this Akira isn't that one, and won't ever be again. For this Akira, a gentle touch like this one is all that he knows how to ask for, and clearly, visibly, more than he expects. Jun feels honored, to be able to give it to him.

When Akira finally slips back into restless sleep, Jun carefully stands, and whispers to Morgana, "How are you doing? Do you need anything?"

Morgana shakes his head no, and curls against Akira's chest. Jun leaves them like that, and his chest is full of a strange, heavy knot as he walks back out of the room. How far they've all come, since that long ago day at the memory pools. How much farther Akira and Morgana have come since the memory it had shown. 

How lucky they are, at the end of their journeys so far, to have ended up together.

-//-

Akira doesn't feel any better on day two, which is the worst because Jun waits until Akira has forced himself out of bed, shuffled to the bathroom, and crawled back into bed, before saying, "I think you need to go to the doctor."

Akira shakes his head no.

"I'll go with you," Jun says. "If you want. Or I can stay in the waiting room, whichever's better. But I think you probably need antibiotics. Or if you don't, I want to at least rule it out."

But doctors .

Morgana and Jun have a long conversation that Akira can only understand half of. And he doesn't really listen to that half, because he's just not going to go. He hates doctors. And he's sick right now. How is he supposed to protect himself? He's never been to the doctor when he's sick, unless the hospital stay he doesn't remember from right after the brain injury counts.

"We can sneak Morgana in," Jun offers, and Akira squints at him, surprised. He's never been allowed to bring Morgana with him to a doctor before. But if he has Morgana and Jun with him this time... 

"You'll feel better if you get the right medicine," Jun says. "I promise."

Akira pulls Morgana a little tighter, and nods.

He regrets it within five minutes, and then keeps regretting it, because he has to leave his bed, again, and put on real clothes, and shoes, and get in Jun's car and drive all the way to the doctor's office, and he almost throws up when he gets out of the car.

Jun holds his elbow while he dry heaves into the grass, feeling stupid, then lets Akira lean on him on the way in. Morgana burrows into Akira's hoodie pocket, and purrs gently when Akira is finally settled on a hard plastic seat in the waiting room. They have to wait for what feels like forever, and Akira almost dozes off leaning on Jun. He hates being sick, he decides miserably. Maybe, if Jun's right and the medicine will help, it might actually be worth all this.

Finally, they get called in. Another new doctor greets them, but because Jun is there, he starts talking to him instead of Akira immediately, which is nice. Akira can just sit on the exam table, shivering and sometimes coughing, while Jun explains to the doctor what symptoms he's seen, and when they had started, and all the stuff Akira doesn't feel good enough to try and mime right now.

The doctor listens to Akira's rasping lungs. He checks a few other things, then looks back over at his desk and flips through what is obviously Akira's file. "I see he has quite the prior history," the doctor says to Jun. "Shaken baby syndrome at a year? And--"

Akira shrinks back, even though the question hadn't been aimed at him. He's tired of everything being because of his old labels and his million diagnoses. He braces, but... Jun interrupts.

"I don't see what any of that has to do with getting him a strep test," he says calmly. 

"Well," the doctor says. "It's just worth talking about."

"There's nothing in that file that's going to make him more likely to catch a cold or the flu or strep," Jun says. "Akira's not immunocompromised, so why don't we just skip to the part where we figure out how to help him?"

The doctor looks annoyed.

Akira puts his hands in his hoodie, and curls them around Morgana in a quiet gesture of joy in the middle of all the sick gross misery he's been feeling.

Jun is protecting him.

The doctor has to stick a long swab down Akira's throat before they're allowed to leave, but there's no needles, and Akira doesn't think right now that Jun would let them do that to him. When they leave the doctor's office, some of the trust that had frayed so badly when Akira heard the real story of Jun's past feels like it's back.

That feels better even than the antibiotics do, when a nurse calls Jun two hours later and says the strep test had come back positive. Akira bounces back pretty fast over the next couple days, his cough and sniffling and sore throat fading to nothing. He goes back to school, and starts eating again.

But the trust sticks around. Not quite where it had been before, but better.

Chapter Text

After Jun had mentioned that there seemed to be a mix-up with his paperwork, Akira saw a familiar routine. Jun spent a lot of time on the phone or going to meetings. He got a lot of serious-looking mail. Akira heard Jun talking to some of his old friends a lot, and it sounded like one of them had tried to fight through child services before and had some advice. Although Jun looked frustrated a lot of the time, he kept assuring Akira that he was going to get it sorted out and he didn’t need to worry.

Akira wanted to hope he was right, but he’d seen this all before. There were foster parents who’d tried to fight the system in the past, and at best he’d get to stay a little longer while they plead their case. No matter what, eventually he’d always have to move. He was a little happy that Jun was fighting this hard, but he didn’t really think it would make a difference in the end.

Until one day Jun told Akira, “Remember how I said you might have to give a statement or something?” When Akira nodded, Jun continued, “Well, someone from child services would like to set up an interview with you.”

Akira had never had that happen before. He wasn’t sure what an interview was supposed to do, so he asked, What for?

Jun replied, “Just to ask you about fostering and such. They want to get to know you a bit and figure out what’s best for you. That’s what child services is supposed to do, after all: figure out what’s best for a child and make sure they get it.”

That made Akira scowl as he signed sharply, Then why have they never asked me before?

That made Jun chuckle dryly and answer, “That’s a very good question. I expect it could only be answered by whoever’s been managing your case until now.” Shaking his head a little, Jun continued, “Anyway, it’s up to you. What would you like to do?”

Akira considered the question. He didn’t really like anyone involved with the system that kept throwing him around without even caring what he wanted, and he kind of didn’t want anything to do with them. But this time they were trying to do something different. Maybe it might mean a different outcome. And if Jun was willing to fight so hard for him, and to even get mad at other people for Akira’s sake, then maybe Akira could try a little bit too. So eventually he signed, OK, I’ll talk to them.

Jun sighed and smiled widely at Akira. “I’m glad to hear it. I’ll let them know and we’ll work out a time.”

Akira nodded back, hoping he’d made the right decision.

On the day of the interview, Jun picked Akira up at school, then drove him to some official-looking building. After sitting in a waiting room for a while, a man in a suit came to get Akira.

Akira got up to follow the man. Jun didn’t. When Akira looked at him in confusion, Jun smiled and said, “They want to talk to you without me. It’ll be OK. I’ll be right here when you get done.” Akira wasn’t too happy about that, but he nodded and followed the man.

Akira was brought into a small meeting room that only had a table and two chairs, facing across each other. He was told to sit in the chair facing the door, then left alone.

As soon as Akira sat down, something about the room made him nervous. He started looking around the room to try and figure out why. There was a little plastic dome in the corner of the room that usually meant a camera, and when Akira focused a bit he could tell the camera was on and pointing right at him. For once, having a functioning camera on him felt like a good thing.

He kept looking around the room, but there was nothing else there. The walls were bare, there was nothing on the floor (which also felt like a good thing), and there was a big window behind him letting in afternoon sunlight. That was good, too. He could see outside. People could see him. He wasn’t boxed in. Jun knew where he was and was waiting for him. For some reason, these things seemed really important. It made sitting at a table staring at a door and waiting for someone to come interview him feel a little more bearable.

He still tensed up a bit when the door opened and a woman with graying hair walked in, carrying an armload of papers. She smiled at Akira and said, “You must be Akira. Thanks for coming in to talk with me.” She put her stack of files and notebooks on the table and settled into the chair opposite him.

As Akira eyed the files like they were about to jump up and bite him, the woman said, “I understand you’re not able to talk, right?” Akira glanced over at her and nodded. Nodding back, she picked up a notebook and said, “Then can you use this to write answers to my questions?” She held the notebook out to him, along with a pencil.

Akira nodded again and took the notebook. He would rather write than type out answers on an AAC device, and he doubted she knew any sign language. He flipped open to the first page, which was completely blank, and waited for her questions.

She started by saying, “You’ve probably heard already, but the reason for this interview is to try and get to know you a bit better so we can figure out what’s the best place for you.” Akira nodded. Jun had said basically the same thing already. The woman opened up her own notebook, tilted away from Akira so he couldn’t see what was on it, and asked, “To start with, how’s school been? Have they been making accommodations for your mutism?”

Akira nodded and started writing. School’s fine. I’m allowed to write answers whenever teachers ask me something, and I have an AAC device if I need it. But I’d rather write or use sign language. Jun’s been learning sign language, so sometimes I can talk with that, but most people in school don’t know it so I have to write. Usually the teacher doesn’t call on me to answer questions, unless it’s writing something on the board. And obviously I can’t read anything out loud if the class is reading passages from a book, so I get to skip that.

Akira turned the notebook around so the woman could read it. When she’d finished, she asked, “How are other kids treating you? Do you have any friends?”

Akira frowned and turned the notebook back towards himself to write, Nobody wants to hang out with the dumb kid who can’t talk. And I always end up moving around anyway, so I don’t bother making friends.

The woman’s eyebrows raised just a little when she read that, and she countered, “You’re not dumb at all. Your grades are actually quite good.”

Akira shrugged and wrote, Jun’s a teacher, so he’s good at helping me with homework.

“I’m glad to hear he’s helping you,” the woman said. “But I also see that you sometimes used to go to the high school after school and got tutoring in more advanced subjects.”

Akira snorted a laugh. “Tutoring” was a very generous term for it. He wrote, I did go to the high school, but the guy from the school board who organized that died, and now I don’t have to do that any more. I’m glad. It was boring sitting there reading textbooks alone.

The woman’s eyebrows rose again and she gave a small hum before making some notes in her notebook. Then she said, “Let’s talk about something a bit more general. What’s your typical daily schedule like?”

Akira considered how to answer that in a way that didn’t give away anything he wasn’t supposed to do, then wrote, I get up, Jun makes breakfast, go to school, come home, I do homework and Jun helps sometimes, Jun makes dinner, I have free time for whatever, get ready for bed, then sleep.

The lady didn’t have any particular reaction to that, just asked, “How is your daily schedule different from when you were at your last foster home?”

Akira wrinkled his nose a little as he answered, There was a lot more kids, so it was busy and loud. I’d usually spend time at a park or something after school so I had more quiet time to myself. He hadn’t wanted to say before that he liked staying out for a while, but he thought he could get away with it this way. He also wanted to try and make him living with Jun sound better, so he added, With Jun I have my own room so it’s quiet and I have my own space. And the last foster parent couldn’t spend as much attention on each kid, but Jun can give me all his attention.

The woman asked, “Do you like living with Jun?” Akira nodded. After a moment when it was obvious he wasn’t going to write anything, the woman asked, “Besides having your own space, is there anything else you like about living with him?”

Akira had to think for a bit to come up with something to say that didn’t give away just how much trouble Akira had been, then answered, Jun doesn’t get mad. If I’m rude or did something wrong or something, Jun doesn’t get mad. He just talks to me about why I did that and how to make it better. And when I was sick, Jun took care of me. He told me right away to stay home from school, then stayed home himself to take care of me and even took me to the doctor. Most of my foster parents never had time for that so they’d make me go to school anyway.

The woman’s lips pressed into a thin line at that, and she made another note in her notebook. Then she asked, “Is there anything about living with Jun that you don’t like?”

Akira frowned but shook his head. He couldn’t explain anything about past lives or whatever, and he figured if he said anything bad about Jun it would just mess things up more, so it was better to not say anything at all.

“Really?” the woman said. She didn’t look like she believed him. “Nothing at all? Not even something small, like he makes you go to bed too early?”

Akira frowned down at his notebook, trying to think of what kind of answer she wanted. If she just wanted to hear something small, then…he eventually wrote, He keeps trying to buy me stuff.

“What do you mean?” the woman asked. “What kind of stuff?”

Akira answered, Stuff like bedsheets with kid patterns, or toys, or decorations. He was quick to add, And of course he buys me food and clothes and stuff, but I’m talking about he wants to buy me stuff I don’t really need.

The faint furrows in the woman’s brow made her look slightly confused as she asked, “Why don’t you like it when he tries to buy you those things?”

Akira shrugged and wrote, Because they’re just going to be wasted when I’m gone. He hasn’t fostered a kid before and I’m too much trouble so he’s probably not going to want to foster anymore after I have to move again. So I don’t want him to waste his money getting stuff for me that he’d never going to use again.

When he looked up at the woman, she looked…was that disappointed? Akira felt a stab of worry that he’d said the wrong thing somehow before she asked, “You’re aware Jun is trying to adopt you, right?” Akira nodded. The woman opened her mouth to say something, closed it, then said, “It is rather unusual for a single man to adopt a child. Do you know why he wants to?”

Akira stared down at his notebook, face scrunched in a thoughtful look as he considered how to answer. He was still trying to figure that out himself. He couldn’t really understand why someone would want someone who was kind of broken like him. But he tried to remember what Jun had said and slowly began to write.

He said because he wants me to have somewhere safe to live. And he doesn’t care that I’m too much trouble and my brain is broken. And- He hesitated a bit, before adding the bit that Jun seemed most sure about but made the least sense to Akira. -because he wants me. He immediately shied away from that thought, so he hastily scribbled out “me” and wrote “to” instead.

From the way the lady squinted at the page, she might have read the crossed-out word anyway. She didn’t say anything about it, but the vague hum she made wasn’t exactly encouraging. Instead she said, “Still, the ideal placement for a child is with a married couple, or biological family.” She glanced at something in her file, and added, “I see your biological father is still alive, though he’s in a coma.”

Akira’s breath hitched, and a rushing in his ears drowned out whatever the lady was saying about looking for other family. The back of his neck was pricking again, and he hunched in on himself, his shoulders rising to try to protect his neck. His face was starting to stretch into that stiff smile he always made whenever he was scared. Something in him was whispering to stop making trouble, act happy, do whatever they say, you’ll only get hurt if you don’t.

“Akira!” the woman yelled. Akira flinched and eyes snapped up to look at her, his smile stretching wider as he tried to prove to her that he was being good, being happy, she didn’t need to be angry or punish him. But she looked worried, not angry. After a moment she said, “You…why don’t you tell me about one thing you like? Anything at all.”

Something he liked? There was only one thing that came to mind, someone Akira wished he had with him right now. With shaky handwriting, he wrote, Morgana.

When he paused, his hand frozen over the notebook, the woman tilted her head to read around his hand, then asked, “Who’s Morgana?”

My cat, Akira wrote. He’s...he hesitated, since their relationship was a little complicated after he heard Morgana could talk but not to him, then eventually continued…my friend. I found him a while ago, and he comes with me whenever I move. He’s really smart. Jun let him come too.

“That’s nice of him,” the lady said. “Tell me more about Morgana.”

Akira started rambling on the paper, his handwriting gradually getting smoother as he talked about the kind of food Morgana liked and the kind of games he liked to play and how soft his fur was. When his words finally petered out, the woman said, “Morgana sounds like a great friend to you.” Then her voice got very gentle as she said, “Now Akira, can you tell me what happened?” He looked up at her with confusion, not understanding what she meant. So she clarified, “You seemed…upset. Can you tell me why?”

Akira frowned, trying to think back. What were they talking about before Morgana? Was it Jun? A slight pricking at his neck made Akira’s mind shy away from thinking too hard about it, so eventually he shrugged.

Watching Akira carefully, the woman said, “Well, I was talking about seeing if you had any surviving relatives.” No reaction from Akira. Until she added, “Besides your father.”

A sharp stab at the back of Akira’s neck made him flinch, and he clapped a hand to the spot to protect it.

“Akira?” cried the woman in alarm, half rising in her seat. “What’s wrong?”

Akira shrunk away from her and shook his head, even as his mouth started to stretch into that smile again. Nothing’s wrong, be happy. But the woman didn’t look convinced, and kept asking, “Are you hurt? Let me see.”

More sharp prickles at the back of his neck warned him that letting anyone see would be bad for him. So Akira shook his head harder and brought up his other hand to cover his neck too.

The woman took in a deep breath, then let it out slowly. Her voice was gentle again as she said, “Akira, I want to make sure you’re OK. That’s what I’m here for, to make sure you’re being taken care of right. If you’re hurting or scared, I need to know why so I can figure out how to make it better. So please let me see your neck so I can figure out what’s wrong.”

Akira was trembling slightly, holding tight to the back of his neck as he stared at her. The urge to be happy, show them nothing’s wrong was warring with be good, do whatever they say. Which one would hurt less? Which one would be less scary? Which one would make people less mad at him? Eventually obey won out, and he slowly lifted his hands away and twisted in his seat so the woman could see the back of his neck.

He heard the woman gasp at the sight of the old scars there. Then she asked quietly, “Are you hurt like that anywhere else?” Stiffly, Akira nodded. “Can you show me, please?”

Akira was wearing long sleeves, like he almost always did, even in the summer. But now he pushed up one sleeve, moving carefully to avoid brushing against the raised, rubbery scars that made a twisted design on his arm.

He glanced up at the woman to find her eyes were wide. Then she asked quietly, “Did Jun do these to you?”

Akira shook his head as hard as he could, his hands fumbling for his pencil until he could write in big letters, Jun would never!

The woman let out a breath, then asked, “Then do you know how these happened?”

Akira had had those scars for as long as he could remember. He really only had stories to go off of, but he tried to answer as best as he could. It was when I was a baby. Someone hurt me. He tried to think of what else he knew, and flinched when a prickling on his neck warned him to stop. He pressed on anyway, saying, I think my dad hurt me. A sharper stab on his neck, and his hands started shaking hard enough that he was worried the woman wouldn’t be able to read his handwriting, so he wrote the letters bigger to try to make them readable. I think he’d hurt me again if he could. I don’t want to see him. I can’t go back to him! You can’t make me!

“OK, OK, that’s enough Akira, you can stop,” the woman assured him. Akira was having trouble holding the pencil anyway, so he let it drop from his hand. He was breathing in quick little pants as he watched it roll across the table until it fell off the side.

“Good job,” the woman said. “Now, can you take a deep breath for me?” She demonstrated, taking a deep breath of her own. Akira followed her, gasping in a lungful of air. “Good. Now let it out,” she said, and demonstrated. Akira followed along, blowing out the air hard like he was trying to blow out a candle.

“Very good. Now let’s breathe deep again,” the woman said, and guided Akira into taking another deep breath and blowing it out. By the time they finished breathing in and out a third time, Akira’s hands had stopped shaking.

“Well done,” she told him. “Now, why don’t you tell me about something else you like?” She handed him a new pencil to replace the one that rolled away.

Besides Morgana, there was something else Akira wished he had right now. So he wrote, I’ve got a blanket. Another foster kid gave it to me and I’ve been bringing it around since then. It’s soft and warm and has flowers all over it. Jun says flowers all have meanings and came up with nice meanings for all the flowers on my blanket.

“That sounds nice,” the woman said. “Now Akira, do you feel safe with Jun?” Akira nodded. “Do you want to stay with Jun?” Akira nodded again.

The woman smiled at him and said, “OK, I think that’s all the questions I have for you. Thank you for coming in, you did a great job. Let’s get you back to Jun.”

When someone led Akira back to the waiting room, Jun took one look at him and his eyes grew wide, asking, “Akira? Are you alright?”

Akira didn’t really feel good, but he didn’t exactly feel bad anymore, either. So he just signed, I want to go home.

Jun took in a sharp breath. Dimly Akira wondered if he’d ever called Jun’s place “home” before. Then Jun smiled and nodded. “Sure, let’s go home. I’m sure Morgana’s missing you.”

As soon as they got back to the apartment, Akira went right to his room and curled up under the blanket from Goro. Morgana burrowed under it to press himself against Akira, purring until Akira started to feel OK again.

After that, it seemed like things started to move faster with the adoption process. Akira overheard Jun on a phone call with his friends where he said dryly, “Apparently child services suddenly decided that what Akira needs most is a stable, supportive environment where he gets individualized attention and appropriate accommodations for his special needs.” Then he sounded warmer as he added, “And Akira said he feels safe with me, so now they think I’m a better fit for him.” Akira pretended he didn’t hear that and tiptoed away.

It took time, but after Akira’s interview, everything was so much easier. It felt less like Jun was fighting against an ocean of judgement and red tape, and more like he was just going through a bureaucratic process. It was hard, and slow, especially since there were so many errors in Akira’s paperwork. But he was making progress.

And then, one day, he realized the paperwork errors were cleared up. They weren’t fully set, not yet. But he didn’t expect any more major problems to crop up. And if they did, he’d deal with them.

At dinner, Jun couldn’t hold back his smile. “I wanted to tell you, Akira,” he began, and waited until Akira’s focus was on him. “Your caseworker said we can move forward with the adoption. It’s not final yet, because the process is a long one. But there’s no more objections or snags from the paperwork.”

Akira’s expression grew guarded, even as Morgana perked up happily. Are you sure the paperwork is okay? the boy asked.

Jun nodded. “As sure as I can be. I think your caseworker is on our side now, too. So if more problems show up, we’ll deal with them.”

Akira simply nodded. But Jun saw a small, genuine smile on his face. Hopefully, as they moved forward, Akira would be able to trust that he could stay.

They ate in silence for a long while. Then, Jun brought up something he’d been turning over in his mind. “Akira. Morgana, too. How would you feel if we moved somewhere else, after the adoption goes through? All three of us, obviously.”

Morgana had Akira’s AAC device in front of him, and quickly typed out a reply. “Is there a reason why you want to move?”

Akira shot a small smile at Morgana. It was clear he appreciated Morgana putting in the effort to communicate in a way Akira understood. Then he focused on Jun again, waiting for the response to Morgana’s question

Jun fiddled with his watch as he looked outside the window. “Well… there’s some dangers in Iwatodai, I think, related to Personas and demons.”

Akira made a face. Morgana’s tail twitched anxiously as he typed out a reply. “It’s gonna get handled at some point. I think.” he replied.

Akira glanced between them, but didn’t ask for more details, so Jun didn’t give more details about the Dark Hour or anything. “The other reason is… Well. I’m not sure if it would be an issue anymore, but it worries me.”

Akira made a go on motion with his hand, rolling his eyes.

“Okay. So, I’ve been thinking lately. It was odd that Mr. Ikutsuki took an interest in you, Akira. And I learned shortly after I got my memories back that he’d been doing a lot of very unethical and shady things, working for the Kirijo Group. I worry that he noticed something… special about you Akira. And even though he’s gone now, he might have left notes about you, and someone else from the company may try to act on them.”

Morgana narrowed his eyes in suspicion. Akira mimicked the expression and started signing. He was weird. I first met him during a doctor’s appointment. I don’t know why a school person was at the doctor’s.

Jun and Morgana both stiffened. “Did anything weird happen at that doctor’s appointment, with him?” Jun asked, unable to keep the urgency from his voice.

Akira tugged a lock of hair before replying. He asked about my nightmares. I have this one where everything’s green, and he was really interested in that.

Jun swallowed. “Okay. Then, that’s further proof that he had hidden intentions with you. Everything being green… that’s related to the current weird stuff. The fact that you’re awake during that time… it shows you have a sort of potential. He knew about that. I don’t know what he planned to do with you, but someone else from the company could use that information.”

Akira balled his hands into fists, gritting his teeth. Morgana rubbed against him slightly, before tapping out a response. “I’m for moving then. We’ll be safer away from this city.”

Akira sighed, then added his own two cents. I don’t care where I am, as long as I have Morgana and- His hands jittered, but Jun thought he saw him start to sign Jun’s own name. His heart warmed. Where were you planning to go?

“I’m not sure,” Jun started. “We could move back to Sumaru City, but I wouldn’t want to trigger any unpleasant memories for you, Akira.”

Akira nodded. No Sumaru. he signed firmly.

Jun gave a smile, glad Akira could give a firm answer. “Alright, no Sumaru. If not there… Well, I can find work anywhere with schools. I’ll look into it. It has to have schools that will properly accommodate you, too. Maybe… maybe somewhere smaller, quieter, if the schools are good enough?”

Morgana and Akira both gave shrugs, and Jun grinned. “Well, we’ll figure it out. We have time now.”

Chapter Text

Soon after the talk with Mr. Kashihara about Personas, Minato and his team found out who Ryoji really was. They were faced with a horrible choice and a daunting task.

Sometimes, Minato thought about asking Mr. Kashihara for advice, or asking him to join the fight. But everything had gotten so complicated. He didn't know for sure if Mr. Kashihara would agree with the team's decision to keep fighting. He thought the teacher probably would, but he wasn't certain.

Besides, they were so busy. He didn't have time to integrate a new fighter into his strategies, and he had to make the best use of his time even when he wasn't fighting. And, even if they managed to stop Nyx, he knew that their battles were dangerous. Any one of them could die. He didn't want to ask Mr. Kashihara to risk himself like that, especially not when he was taking care of Akira.

So he didn't explain the new revelations to his teacher. Over the next month or two, he hardly had time to chat with him in depth. The same went for Akira.

Part of that was that Akira hadn't been going to the shrine as much. Minato thought Mr. Kashihara might have been keeping him home more with the way the atmosphere of the city was changing. And most of the time when he did see the boy, he was extra sullen. He even saw him once or twice without Morgana. He'd approached him sometimes, but Akira never wanted to hang out.

Then, one day, Minato stopped by the shrine to find Akira sitting on top of the jungle gym, swinging his legs, cat on his shoulder and looking… lighter. When he saw Minato, he gave a wave, scribbled something in his notepad, and clambered down to hand it over.

Can we talk?

When Minato looked down at the boy, there was something more… open about his expression.

Minato had sometimes wondered why Akira had been his Hope social link, when the boy seemed to lack any hope. But he could see the hope now. It took his breath away for a moment, before he nodded. “Let's go sit,” he said. “Is everything alright with Mr. Kashihara?”

Akira paused, considering the question, before giving a nod. They sat on a bench, and Akira started writing. He kept writing for a while, in fact. When he handed over the notepad, the page was full.

I wanted to thank you for teaching me to whistle. And other things, like helping Jun and helping me when I ran away. I'm pretty sure things are going to be okay with Jun at this point. I thought I would have to leave, but he managed to stop it.

The whistling is useful. The other day, we were at the mall, when someone started shouting about that cult stuff. A crowd formed and I got separated from Jun. But I whistled really loud, and it helped him find me. He was scared, but since I knew how to whistle it was okay.

He bought himself a whistle after that, and I asked for an extra one. I want you to have it. I guess you don't need it since you can whistle on your own, but maybe it can be a reminder.

When Minato looked up, Akira had a shiny silver whistle in his hand. Silently, the two traded. Notebook for whistle. Silently, they both broke into small smiles.

Finally, Minato spoke. “Thanks. I’ll keep it as a reminder. And I’m glad things are going better with Mr. Kashihara.”

There had been so much written in that story, but what struck Minato was the things he thought he could read between the lines. A whistle as a reminder. He couldn't know for sure what kind of reminder Akira meant. Maybe he just meant very literally a reminder that whistling is a tool in his arsenal. But he thought it might be deeper than that. Or at least he would take it that way.

He still worried about Akira. The boy still tried too hard to close himself off and avoid attachments. But he was getting better. And Minato thought the whistling lessons had helped at least a little.

Akira whistled to help Mr. Kashihara find him. He had people he trusted to have his back and listen for him now. Minato had the same. He'd been so alone until this year, but now he had so many people he could rely on, who he wanted to be there for. Reasons to keep fighting. And here was another. He wanted Akira and Mr. Kashihara to have more time together. He wanted Akira to be able to grow and become open to friendships. To make bonds.

As he walked home, whistle in his pocket, the hum of a fully strengthened bond in his chest, his resolve strengthened once more.

Some days later, about a week before the Fall was to come, the second years had their career counseling meetings. It was the first time since before Ryoji left that Minato talked with Mr. Kashihara one on one, and he was tense as he watched his homeroom teacher shuffle through papers.

There was a long pause as Mr. Kashihara seemed to look him over, before he offered a smile and began. “Let's get started,” he said. “I don't have much to say regarding your future. It's your choice. But do you know yet whether you want to join the workforce or go to college after you graduate?”

Minato had been trying to come up with an answer to that question since he learned this talk was coming. But he didn’t have an answer. After a long moment’s thought, he replied. He didn't want to dump his issues on Mr. Kashihara’s lap, but he found himself speaking far more honestly than he intended. "I... don't actually know yet what I want to do with my future…” he said. “If I can be honest, for a long time I didn't even think I'd live long enough to start a career or anything like that. I've only recently realized that... I really really want to see what the future holds. So, I've only just started to figure it out.”

He found himself staring at the table as he spoke, but glanced up to see a warm smile on his teacher’s face, mixed with melancholy. “That's perfectly fine,” he reassured. “In fact, that's really wonderful. You'll have time to figure out more details. You have all of senior year, after all. Besides…” He looked off into the distance. “With the atmosphere in the city lately, it reminds me of how things were when I was a student. And I figure you're likely too busy right now with some more urgent matters, am I right?”

Minato nodded, guilt curling in his stomach.

Mr. Kashihara just kept smiling, something painfully kind in his eyes. “Like I told you, if you want to talk about it, or want help or advice, I'll be here. Although I did want to ask your advice. Your friends in your class. Iori and Takeba and Aigis. Do you think they would appreciate the offer to talk? I’d ask for Mochizuki, but he transferred.”

Minato flinched at the mention of Ryoji. “I haven't told anyone that you know about this stuff. It would be an extra variable, and your story doesn't seem to have anything to do with what we're dealing with. And… I won't ask for that… direct help. Adding a new member to the team would be more trouble than it's worth.”

He swallowed. “As for Ryoji… you sensed something from him?”

Mr. Kashihara nodded. “It felt different than the rest of you. And it was almost… hidden. Why?”

Minato let out a shuddering breath. “Ryoji was… not what he thought he was. Not what anyone thought he was. And now he's gone.”

Mr. Kashihara put a hand to his mouth, eyes widening as he understood at least some of the implication. “Then, I'm sorry for carelessly brushing against a recent wound. And I won't mention anything to your friends, either.”

There was a moment of silence as Mr. Kashihara wrote something down, before fixing Minato with a kind stare. “Arisato, I truly hope the future goes well for you. Whatever trial you may be facing, I believe you can overcome it. All your friends have grown so much this year, but I've especially seen it in you. I'm sorry such a burden has come to rest on all of your shoulders, but you are strong enough to see it through. Whatever it is. And, when it's all over, you can focus on living your life, and what you want to do with it. Whatever it is, make sure it's your own decision, no one else's. And if you make sure of that, then I'm sure whatever you do will be amazing.”

Minato felt a dull burning in the back of his eyes. A small smile graced his lips. “Thanks…” he whispered.

“Of course,” Mr. Kashihara replied. “Unless there's anything else you want to discuss, I think we're done here.”

Minato nodded, so Mr. Kashihara smiled, shuffling his papers. “If you could send in Aigis next, that would be great. And I hope you have a wonderful senior year.”

Minato slipped from his chair, sending Aigis in. He left the school, gazing up at a cloudless sky. Maybe they could really do this. At the very least, he would try his hardest to make sure they succeeded. He wanted to see senior year, after all.

Chapter Text

Morgana woke up the moment the Dark Hour started. January 31st, a night of a full moon. And something was wrong.

Things had been getting worse over the past month or so. It wasn't uncommon for Morgana to stay awake through the Dark Hour, guarding Akira while he slept. But the atmosphere tonight was far worse than before. It put his fur on end.

He almost wanted to go find Jun, or go outside. But that would require leaving Akira, who luckily still slept. So Morgana planned to wait the hour through once more, guarding his friend.

Except, partway through the Hour, Jun peeked his head into Akira's room. In the eerie green light, Morgana met Jun's eyes. Jun stepped into the room, casting a worried glance at Akira before focusing on Morgana.

“My Persona woke me up,” he said softly, sitting down in a chair. “It's a full moon, isn't it?”

Morgana's tail lashed as he looked out the window. “Something’s wrong,” he said. “I think matters may be coming to a head.”

They'd never directly discussed it, but Jun and Morgana had both paid attention to the growing cult in Iwatodai, their talk of the end of the world. It was far too similar to what they had seen in Sumaru City.

“Arisato told me full moons have been important,” Jun added.

Morgana tilted his head. “I guess we have to leave it up to him and his team.”

Jun opened his mouth to reply, when Akira stirred.

—

It was like the nightmare. Eyes open to an eerie green world. But Akira could hear Morgana meowing and Jun's voice. And, unlike before, he could move. He sat up in his bed, to find the two staring at him.

Is this a dream? Akira signed, only to see Morgana and Jun shake their heads.

“No, it isn't,” Jun said. “I've heard it called the Dark Hour. Time stands still at midnight, for an hour.”

Akira made a face, slipping out of bed to find the AAC device. Morgana meowed at him, and Jun drew in a sharp breath.

“Electronics don't work right now, unfortunately,” Jun explained.

Akira scowled, before sitting on the edge of his bed. Why were you guys talking in my room? he asked.

Jun and Morgana shared a look, before Jun sighed. “I was worried. Something feels… wrong tonight.”

Morgana meowed, and Jun added “Morgana says: ‘I don't want to leave you alone tonight.’”

Akira looked at the worry plain on their faces and felt a shiver go through him. Because it wasn't just worry. Why are you scared? he asked slowly, not sure if he wanted to hear the answer.

They both looked towards the window. Morgana replied first, and Jun translated for him. “He says ‘I think something bad is supposed to happen. There are people working to stop it, but we can't do anything.’”

Then, Jun fiddled with his watch, which he'd put on despite being in pajamas. “It feels… wrong, tonight. And I think someone we care about is facing a dangerous fight.”

Akira considered this for a moment, looking out the window. Then let's stay up together, he suggested. Wait it out.

—

Jun smiled at Akira. “That's a good suggestion. Maybe we can distract ourselves. There's just enough light to read.”

And that's what they did. Akira and Morgana crowded around one book, while Jun paged through one of his own. Until something changed.

Morgana clearly felt it first, jolting in place before staring out the window. And then Chronos, Jun's Persona, was on high alert. Jun snapped his book closed, rising to his feet. Even Akira felt it, a shudder going through him as his eyes were drawn to the window.

The boy slipped out of bed, looking out the window, and gasped. And when Jun took a look himself, he felt like screaming. On the sidewalks, he could see people where there had been coffins, and more people were coming out of the apartment complexes. He saw black oily things, monsters, demons. A chorus of fear and confusion was growing louder and louder.

But that was nothing compared to the moon. It looked far too close. And it had cracked open like an eye. Chronos reacted to it, screaming warnings.

Jun was stuck there, watching the moon. A shudder went through him as he noticed some of the people on the streets begin to turn into those oily black monsters.

And then Morgana called out. “Jun, come on! We're going!”

Jun tore himself from the window, to hear Akira's footsteps heading away. Morgana waited in the bedroom doorway, and when Jun looked at him, he nodded before racing after his friend.

Jun caught up with Akira at the door outside. “Akira, it's not safe out there,” he said, unable to school the fear from his own voice.

Akira slipped on his shoes, before freeing his hands to sign. It's not safe anywhere. But I think I have to go out.

Jun swallowed, meeting Akira's serious gaze. “Then I'll come too. Morgana and I can make sure we're all safe.” He could feel a pull outside too, even as he shoved his feet into his shoes and led the way out.

It was worse outside, without a pane of glass to separate him from the horrors. The aura of the moon beat down on him like a physical thing. The streets were pandemonium, screams ringing out over the whole city.

He watched a Shadow swallow someone whole and shifted to stand in front of Akira as the Shadow turned its attention their way. Morgana perched on the boy's shoulder. In unison, Jun and Morgana cried “Persona!”

—

Akira didn't know why he felt he had to be outside. It was clearly dangerous. There were monsters here, closer than the monster in the sky. But then Jun and Morgana both cried something and glows appeared around them. Two creatures, semi translucent, appeared. One was blue, with massive white wings on its feet. The other was black and white, with gold wings around its shoulders and a clock for a face.

A monster had been heading their way, but these two beings, these two… Personas, they cut it down in an instant, before returning to hover around them, as if to stand guard. Akira watched with wide eyes. Something about them was… familiar. The back of his neck tingled, warning him not to remember. But right now, it was like what that cult had been saying. The world was ending. It was easier to handle that tingle when everything already felt so wrong.

So he didn't push to try to remember, but he didn't push the sense of familiarity away. Not right now. Not tonight. The world was ending, but Jun and Morgana would protect him as long as they could. Akira stepped closer behind Jun, peeking up at his fierce expression as he scanned for threats. Then, Jun glanced back at him, and the worry and the care were so obvious. Akira quickly slipped his hand into Jun's, giving a squeeze, before pulling his hand free. Jun and Morgana would fight for him. And maybe someday he could fight for them in return.

He didn't want things to end here, he realized. He wanted to keep living.

And then he felt something like a call, like a whistle for attention.

—

Morgana watched as Jun and Akira, in unison, shifted their postures. They were looking out, past everything in this world.

The part of Morgana that was of the Velvet Room could sense it, almost see it. Bonds, strong and powerful, and the power of the Velvet Room helping forge it into power. Jun and Akira had roles to play here. So, looking out at the chaos on the street, Morgana knew he would keep them safe.

—

Jun felt the pull in his chest, and his eyes were drawn to that tower. Tartarus, Arisato had called it. Somehow, he knew that that remarkable young man was listening. Or at least he hoped so. So he spoke.

“I've been where you are. Facing down an impossible end of the world and an impossible foe. You're not alone, Arisato. You have your friends, your teammates. And you have me, too. I know you can do this.”

—

Akira could vaguely hear Jun speak. He was lost in his own thoughts. Facing what felt like death, he wanted to live. He wanted to stay with Morgana and Jun. And even more than that. He wanted to keep writing letters with Goro, and even see him again someday. He wanted to see Maiko again too. He wanted to spend more time with Minato, who understood how hard it was to connect to people, yet did it anyway. Minato wouldn't give up now either, he was certain.

Akira put his fingers to his mouth and whistled as loud as he could, the sound echoing. A call. A reminder of connections. Minato would understand what he meant, he thought.

—

The three, Akira and Jun and Morgana, stuck together throughout the rest of that crisis. Morgana and his Persona guarded Akira and Jun as they stared up at the moon, their hearts reaching out to give support to a young man who desperately needed it at that moment. A final battle, the Universe, a final sacrifice. Akira slipped his hand into Jun's once more as the world held its breath.

And then it was over. As the memory of the Dark Hour was erased from the world, things reverted. Those transformed into Shadows or killed by them were fine. Those on the streets when the Dark Hour began continued with their late night business. And those who had been in bed were there once more. Morgana, Akira and Jun slept soundly, and woke with no memory of what had happened that night.

Chapter Text

When Jun walked into his homeroom class on February 1st, he stumbled. He didn't remember at the time, but it was almost exactly like how he stumbled the day after he remembered his Persona.

Two full, strong Persona resonances rang out at him, from Arisato and Aigis. As he prepared for the day, he worried at that feeling. It didn't feel surprising for some reason. Trying to figure out why that was felt like fiddling with a loose tooth.

The feeling that he was missing something only grew over the next couple days, especially when he noticed faint resonances from some of his other students. Those resonances felt stifled and smothered, but they were definitely still there. And it was almost like he had been expecting resonances from those students in the first place.

The other thing he noticed was that Aigis and Arisato both seemed… sad. Aigis was lonely and didn't seem to have any friends. Jun struggled to remember if that matched up with what he knew. Arisato seemed even more subdued than usual. Something was off. And it felt oddly familiar, like his own struggles with memory.

It took most of a week for him to chip away at the block in his own mind, until he could remember feeling strong Personas from all of the students who had stifled resonances now. He remembered talking to Arisato about Personas. He remembered the Dark Hour, and the terror of the last full moon. The day he remembered, he stayed up, breathing a sigh of relief when no Dark Hour came at midnight.

As he stayed up, he thought about whether he should try to remind Morgana and Akira. From what he knew, Akira would just remember that last full moon. But Morgana had used the Dark Hour to find Akira. He decided to try to nudge Morgana into remembering if he could. He'd leave Akira be, since he didn't have anything important tied to the Dark Hour. Jun was pretty sure he'd been able to break through his own block because of how he'd discussed it with Minato and his desire to be there for the boy. Finding Akira was important for Morgana. If he got Morgana to remember, he'd ask the cat if Akira had anything important tied to the Dark Hour. Otherwise he'd let it be.

Beyond that… there were his students. Arisato and his friends. Something had happened with memory, and based off of how their Personas all felt, it was likely only Aigis and Arisato remembered. Which had to be hard for them.

The next day, he asked to talk to the two of them after class.

—

Minato stayed behind as the rest of the class shuffled out at the end of the day. He waved goodbye to Yukari and Junpei, then traded a glance with Aigis as she stood from her seat. She offered him a hand up, and he took it, enjoying the soft smile on her face. She really had grown so much. And thankfully she still remembered. He didn’t know what it would do to her to forget.

Mr. Kashihara gave them both a warm smile as the last of the students shuffled out, and Aigis and Minato took seats near his desk. “Hello, you two,” he said. “Don't worry, you're not in trouble. I just wanted to chat about something.” He fiddled with the flower in his breast pocket, and Minato tilted his head as he realized it was a shion, an aster. For remembrance. He met his teacher's eyes, searching to see if his suspicion was correct.

Mr. Kashihara met him with empathy and understanding. “I remembered something the other day, something I figure the two of you still remember too,” he began. “Although, Arisato, am I correct that you never told your friends about me?”

Minato could see the way Aigis went rigid, see her fingers shift as she eyed the teacher warily. “How can you remember? Minato… what do you know about him?”

Minato let out a sigh. “I never said anything because, right after I found out, we learned about Ryoji. And Mr. Kashihara didn't really have anything to do with our fight, so I didn't want to complicate things. But he's an old Persona user.”

Aigis narrowed her eyes at Mr. Kashihara, who nodded. “I told Arisato my whole story, but the short version is I, and some friends of mine, had Personas and fought against the end of the world when we were in high school. We all had to forget about it, though, and I only remembered last November. The other important thing is I can sense when someone has a Persona, which is part of how I remembered about last Sunday. I felt your Personas and was less surprised than I should have been. Plus, I promised to support you in these matters, Arisato. I think that helped me break through.”

Minato considered this, before nodding. “He's alright, Aigis.”

Aigis slowly relaxed, but a hint of suspicion still bled through when she asked, “Why did you want to talk to us?”

Mr. Kashihara looked out the window with a sigh. “I guess because I've been where you are. With only one of my old friends remembering what we went through together. At least, I assume you two are the only ones who remember? The others… their Personas feel stifled.”

Minato and Aigis both nodded. They traded a glance and, almost in unison, slumped a bit.

“It is… hard, not being remembered,” Aigis admitted.

Minato bit his lip. “Do you think the others could remember? You did. And there's not a danger to remembering like with your friends.”

Mr. Kashihara shrugged. “I think it's possible,” he said, looking off as he fiddled with his watch. “If I had to make a guess, based off of how it felt… It was likely easier for me than it would be for them. The memory block is more about that Dark Hour than Personas, right?”

The two students nodded.

“Alright, I thought so,” Mr. Kashihara said. “I didn't have many memories to connect to the Dark Hour, but I had the promise I made to Arisato. And I already knew about Personas, and I've felt memory blocks before. All of that made it easier to push past it.

“As for your friends… I think it's not out of the question. Their Personas aren't gone, just muffled. You all must have far more memories tied to the Dark Hour, so I think their mental blocks may be stronger. But if they have a good reason to try to remember, they might be able to. You might be able to nudge them in that direction, too. Of course, this is all speculation, so I may be wrong.” Mr. Kashihara leaned back as he finished his speech.

“Promises, huh?” Minato murmured, glancing at Aigis.

Her eyes widened, her hand going out to quickly squeeze his. “Graduation day,” she said, almost breathless.

Minato nodded. “Hopefully it'll happen by then, at least…” And hopefully he could hold on that long. Every day he felt a little more tired. He knew what choice he'd made during that final fight. Having a little more time was a blessing, but he couldn't convince himself it was more than that…

Mr. Kashihara smiled at them. “Well, I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. And, until and unless the others remember, please be there for each other. If either of you want to talk about it, I'm here to listen. But you can give each other far more than I can.”

Minato and Aigis both nodded, shooting glances at each other.

Mr. Kashihara fiddled with his watch again, a melancholy look overtaking his expression. “I do really hope that your friends remember. But that's all I had to say. You're free to go.”

“Thank you,” Aigis said, rising to her feet. She met Minato’s gaze, giving him a small, genuine smile. Minato met it with his own as he pushed himself to his feet.

“Yeah, thanks,” he said.

And with that, the two of them walked out. Jun watched them go, a hand on a leather watch. The wrong watch, a constant reminder of what he'd lost. What he hoped his students wouldn't permanently lose.

Chapter Text

Minato looked up the steps to the shrine, and sighed deeply. He was so tired, and just looking at those steps made him want to lie down. But he wasn’t getting any healthier. So if he wanted to get his prayers in, he should do it now while he still had the strength to climb up to the shrine.

He made the entire trip with his head down, refusing to look up and see how much further he needed to go. He kept leaning up against the wall because nobody had ever bothered to install a handrail. He’d never noticed the lack of a handrail before. But he absolutely noticed now.

Eventually, breathing heavily, he finished his climb. He made his way to the shrine, and grabbed an ema to write his wish on.

I want my loved ones to remember me

He hung the ema up and looked at it for a while. He had elected not to write “I want my loved ones to remember me before I’m gone.” He wasn’t going to get his hopes up for that. It was enough that he was still able to be around them. To still be friends with Junpei and Yukari. The world could have taken so, so much more from him. It had before. So long as some memory of him still lingered after he was gone, he’d be fine with that.

With that done, he shuffled over to the bench and sat down heavily. He needed time to prepare for the journey back to the dorm. The journey back down those damn stairs with their complete lack of a handrail. So he sat there, closed his eyes, and breathed in the brisk air of the late February afternoon.

He wasn’t sure how long he sat there before the sound of footsteps and the bench creaking next to him made him open his eyes. He looked over to see Akira, petting Morgana and looking out at the empty shrine.

“Hey. Nice to see you again.” Minato said. Akira waved at him, and pulled out his notebook.

“You haven’t been back in a while.”

“Yeah. Sorry about that. I’ve been busy. How have things been going with the adoption?”

”Still a bunch of paperwork. But Jun is basically my permanent guardian now.”

Akira seemed like there was something else he wanted to say, but was hesitating.

“Are you worried something is going to go wrong?”

Akira put his notebook back in his lap, and continued to look out at the shrine. He looked over to the playground where Maiko and him used to play sometimes. They hadn’t been the best of friends. But Akira was still sad when she had to go. Minato had pieced together that Akira was very lonely a while ago. He wondered if disappearing for over a month with no warning had hurt Akira. He felt guilty. But he couldn’t help it. He could barely go to school most days, let alone go out to the shrine.

As he was trying to think of some way to apologize for going away, (and how to broach the subject that pretty soon he would be going away again and not coming back,) Akira opened up his notebook.

”Jun says we should move after the paperwork finishes going through. So I won’t be able to see you anymore.”

“Ah.” Minato said, looking up from the words to Akira’s face. It looked sullen, and almost guilty. “Do you want to move?”

Akira shrugged. His pen hovering over the notebook as he considered his words.

”There’s not much keeping me here. This place is a lot like any other.”

He didn’t elaborate on the “Not much” that was keeping him here. But he’d also never actually admitted to missing Maiko either. So he could guess.

“Well, I’ll remember you after you leave. For what that’s worth. And I’m sure you’ll make some great friends wherever you end up.”

It was supposed to be encouraging. But Akira, of course, got that sour look on his face. The one that said he didn’t believe Minato. It was a sad reminder of how little he could actually do in the end. He could be there for Akira, but he couldn’t make Akira reach out to others. And pretty soon, he wouldn’t be able to be there for him either. Which is what made him decide to push a little, where otherwise he might have given Akira space. Because he probably wasn’t going to get another opportunity.

“Akira. Promise me you’ll try at least? Take it from me. Not making friends sounds like the easy path. You think it’s better to just coast through life, and avoid getting attached to anything or anyone in case you lose them. Because the loss hurts worse than anything. And it does hurt. But you can’t let the hurt make you forget how wonderful it was to have them. You have to open your heart. Because having that love in your life is worth the pain every time.”

He sat there, looking at Akira looking at him. He watched as Akira’s face went from (presumably) mulling over his words, to a slightly confused squinty eyed look. Then, his eyes widened as if he’d just had a terrible realization. He picked up his notebook, and when he turned it over to show him what he’d written, Minato felt a stone drop into his stomach.

”You’re sick.”

Minato did not want to have this conversation. Least of all with Akira, right as he was trying to explain the importance of not letting the fear of loss rule you.

“Yeah. It’s why I’ve been away for a while actually. It’s nothing to worry about.”

His lie was met with a very sudden and violent shake of the head, and a grunted “Nnngh!” Akira scrawled the next words into his notebook with uncharacteristically rough pen strokes.

”Don’t lie to me!”

Of course Akira would see right through him. Akira was smart. Not just academically, with those high school prep textbooks he’d read in the Gekkoukan teacher’s lounge. He could read people incredibly well. Minato looked into Akira’s eyes, half panicked already. Somehow, he already knew the truth. Maybe it was just because Akira automatically assumed the worst possible outcome to any situation, and it just so happened he was right this time. Or maybe Minato just looked way worse than he’d realized. Either way, there was no point lying.

“I don’t have much more time left.”

Akira tapped at his wrist as if there was a watch there. ”How long?”

“I’ll probably be dead in a few weeks. I’m trying my hardest to stick around until graduation. I made a promise to be there. But it’s hard to keep going even that long.” It felt weird to admit that out loud. Yeah, he’d known he was dying all month. But it was very different to know that than it was to say it. It suddenly felt a little more real somehow, now that he wasn’t the only one who knew.

Akira looked away from him, and didn’t write down another word. Morgana scrambled up on his lap and meowed, looking between Akira and Minato. As if unsure what to do.

Then, suddenly, Akira scooped Morgana into his arms and stood up. He started walking away, keeping his face turned so that Minato couldn’t see it. Minato wanted to stand up and go after him. Tell him it would be alright. But he didn’t know what he’d say even if he did have the energy to chase after him. Minato was at peace with everything. He didn’t have regrets. But that peace wasn’t something he could share with words.

So he sat there, and he let Akira go. There was nothing to do but hope that he’d be okay.

A few seconds later, there was the sound of a loud piercing whistle from the bottom of the shrine steps. He looked to where the sound had come from, but obviously couldn’t see Akira from his vantage point. He sat up suddenly, and reached into his bag. After a too long moment of rummaging around, he took out the whistle that Akira had gifted to him months ago. He put it up to his lips, and blew hard to respond.

After a short moment, Akira whistled again. Twice in a row. The sound was sharp and clear even from this distance. Minato put the whistle to his lips and blew into it twice. He waited, but that was it. Akira didn’t whistle again. Like that, the shrine was once again quiet.

Minato put the whistle back into his bag, smiling.

He looked over to the ema he’d hung up, lost among all the others.

I want my loved ones to remember me

He remembered his dad used to whistle a tune. He didn’t know why that memory persisted when so many others were lost. But he remembered it clearly. Walking in the park while his dad whistled, and his mom smiled.

He still remembered the older girl in the orphanage who taught him how to whistle. How he’d taken to it so strongly because it made him feel nostalgic for when his parents were still there.

He glanced over to the empty spot on the bench next to him, where Akinari used to sit when they talked. He remembered the story with the alligator's tears which made a lake that everyone in the forest would drink from. Even though most of the animals never knew them.

He wondered if Akira knew just how much significance those whistles held. They were going to keep his own memory alive. And he’d learned from a kind older kid when he was young, so in a way it held a bit of her too. He’d learned for the memory of his father. Did his father learn from someone important to him as well? How many connections going back how far led to Akira learning to whistle? How long would it keep going?

“You really did have it figured out in the end, didn’t you?” He asked the space where Akinari used to sit. And he rested in silence for a while longer.

Chapter Text

The day before graduation, Jun was in the faculty office, talking to Mr. Ono.

“So, Kashihara, you've gotten in contact with my sister? I gotta say, I'll be sad to see you go,” the helmeted teacher said.

Jun smiled. “Yes, she's been very helpful as I make arrangements to move. Helping me know what to expect and everything.”

“Is the kid you've taken in alright with the move? It'll be a big change to go to such a small town,” Ono replied.

“Akira said he was okay with it. And I think the quiet will be good for both of us.”

“I gotta say, when Ikutsuki brought the boy in at the start of the year, I never imagined you'd end up taking him in. I'm curious. Why did you decide to do it?”

Jun looked away. “It’s hard to explain. It felt like something I needed to do. Or perhaps something like fate…”

And, as his gaze drifted, he saw Minato Arisato standing by the door. “Oh, Arisato, did you need to talk?” he asked, stepping away from the other teacher. From the corner of his eye he could see Ono head off towards his desk.

Arisato shrugged, hands in his pockets. Jun frowned. “You don't look well,” he said, stepping closer. “Maybe you should go to the nurse. Though I imagine your stress might be contributing to exhaustion, you need to take care of yourself.”

Minato gave a ghost of a smile. “So you're really moving?” he asked. “Akira mentioned it.”

Jun looked over his shoulder at the other teachers, then headed to the door. “Let's chat somewhere a bit quieter,” he said with a small smile.

After they found a quiet room, Jun confirmed they were moving. “I feel like we need a fresh start,” he said. “Plus, after everything that happened in this city… I don't want to take chances that something else will happen. I want Akira to be safe.”

The other reason Jun was moving was because he didn't trust the Kirijo corporation. Ikutsuki may be dead, but he must have realized there was something special about Akira. Someone else may try to use the kid, and he did not want that. And the Kirijo Group ran this city. But he was pretty sure Arisato was friends with the heiress, so he wouldn't say that.

Arisato really did look… not great. He was slumped in his chair, eyes bloodshot, skin waxy and pale.

“How are you holding up?” Jun asked after a long pause.

Arisato took a breath to consider. “Do you really think my friends will remember?” he asked.

Jun immediately nodded. “I couldn't be sure before, but it's like the muffles on their Personas are slowly lessening. I think they'll remember soon. And, even though I'm moving, I still want to provide support for you guys. If you want, you and Aigis can tell the others about me once they remember. I'll give you my number, or you can email me.”

They traded contact info, then fell into a more comfortable silence. “I really do have to thank you, Arisato,” he finally said. He briefly thought of mentioning that horrible night when the moon opened up like an eye. Something told him that Arisato in specific was why they were all still here. But that was probably a touchy subject so soon after, while his friends still didn't remember it. And there was somehow a greater gratitude he needed to share.

“Without your push, I don't know if I ever would have taken in Akira. I would have let my fear and doubt control me,” he said. “Akira is now one of the most important people in my life. And it's going to be a struggle, helping him grow and heal from what he's been through. But I wouldn't trade it for anything, and I might not have it without you.”

Minato gave a smile. “You're welcome,” he said, before getting to his feet. “I should let you get back to work.”

“Alright. Take care,” Jun replied. He did have work to do, but he watched Arisato go first. Despite his exhaustion and probable illness, the boy seemed more settled. Jun had seen him grow from someone closed off to someone quiet, but strong. Someone others looked to. Someone with so many people to care about and be cared about in return.

Maybe someday, Akira could grow the same way.

The next day was graduation day. Jun watched from the auditorium as Mitsuru Kirijo gave a speech from the stage. And then he felt it, like smothered fires surging to life when given oxygen once more, or stars showing themselves, no longer drowned out by other lights. As Kirijo stumbled over her words and fell silent, one, two, three, four, five Personas resonated against his own. He watched a small group, led by the boxing captain Akihiko Sanada, rush out of the room. There was no sign of Aigis or Arisato, but Jun figured they were either heading to the same place, or already there. There might have been extra members of their team, ones not in high school or skipping the ceremony, but he was certain they would remember too, and rush to whatever meeting they had.

All would be well.

The ceremony turned into some amount of chaos with the main speaker having run away, but Jun watched as other faculty members got things under control.

He didn't learn until later that Arisato had been brought to the hospital after passing out on the roof.

But he'd been in the hospital at the start of this year. Surely he'd be alright, right? Jun didn't want to say anything, even to Akira, as he listened for word of Arisato's status as seriously as he once listened to Sumaru rumors.

A few days later, the obituary was posted.

Jun brought the short passage in the newspaper to Akira, who was sitting at the kitchen table, with an apology on his lips. They could have visited him in the hospital before the end if Jun hadn't been a coward, although the obituary said he'd never woken up.

Jun set the newspaper in front of Akira and opened his mouth to explain. He was expecting all sorts of reactions. Shock, denial, grief or shutting everything off with that awful smile of his. Instead, his lips parted and formed a small ‘o’.

So he's dead, he remarked, shoulders slumping. The boy looked sad, yes, but it was almost like he expected it.

“I'm sorry, Akira,” Jun said from across the table, sitting down heavily. “I knew he was in the hospital. We could have-”

He cut off as Akira shook his head. I knew he was dying already. He said he wanted to make it to Graduation.

Jun felt his eyes burn. “He… he did, I believe. I think he was among his friends when he first passed out, too.”

Morgana hopped up onto the table, wrapping his tail around his paws. “I thought about saying something, Jun. I know you liked him too. But he only told Akira because he pressed. He didn't want people to know.”

Akira tilted his head. They'd been through this enough by now that Jun automatically translated for Morgana. Then, he sighed. “I'm not upset you didn't tell me. It was his secret to share.”

His vision blurred. He wiped his eyes as he thought about that remarkable young man. His gut told him the death had something to do with Personas, with what happened in the last Dark Hour.

Morgana remembered the Dark Hour now, too, after some prompting. They'd agreed there wasn't anything important they could use to get Akira to remember. And with nothing important, there wasn't much of a point to triggering his memories. But it meant that Akira likely didn't have that sense of what Arisato did. And that stung.

Small arms wrapped around him. Jun looked down to see Akira had gotten up and came next to his chair. Jun gave a watery smile and returned the hug. Tears rolled down Akira's face too. His shoulders hitched.

“I'm planning to attend his funeral,” Jun said. “Do you two want to come?”

Akira drew back, wiping his eyes with the back of his hands. Minato is- was important. He should be remembered, he signed, before looking up at Jun. His eyes were still watery, but there was a determination there.

Morgana nodded. “I'll come too.”

The evening before the more formal funeral, Jun and Akira were invited to the wake. Jun knew Arisato had no family to be there for him. But there were so many people there anyway, at this ceremony for those closest to the departed. A boy and a dog (who both resonated as Persona users, but Jun decided not to worry about it). Another young girl who had hugged Akira tight when she saw him. So many other students, from his classes and clubs and sports. An old monk. An old couple. … Tanaka, from the home shopping program?

Jun stayed near the back, sticking by Akira's side, as one person after another shared stories of how Arisato had helped them. Jun saw the heavy grief among the people he assumed to be Arisato’s team. He saw determination. He saw hopelessness. But they still had each other, and they had their memories once more. He hoped they could guide each other through this. Incense was lit as the monk chanted prayers.

Jun had considered saying a few words too. But his words dried up every time he tried to prepare. And he had to be there for Akira. They both cried on and off through the funeral.

Words failed him, but flowers didn't. He had sent in a wreath, and it sat among other floral arrangements around the still, quiet body of Minato Arisato. White chrysanthemums for death, grief, and the purity of the soul's journey to the afterlife. Aster tartaricus, or shion, for remembrance. He liked connecting the flowers to Minato far more than thinking of how Nyarlathotep had used the name for Akira. And bluebells for gratitude.

He checked the wreath one last time at the end of the wake. Tomorrow, at the end of the funeral, his wreath and the others friends had sent in would be burned alongside Arisato's body during the cremation.

He took a final look at the peaceful expression on the boy's face. Then he went to find Aigis. He had to make sure Arisato's team knew he was willing to lend an ear still, even with Arisato gone.

—

As people wandered from the altar, Akira walked up to it. He hadn't wanted to share his words with all these other people. He'd have to have someone read it for him, and that felt wrong.

Minato had never learned JSL. But maybe his spirit could understand it now. Or maybe these words were more for his own sake than for Minato's.

Thank you, he began, his breath hitching as he looked at Minato's face. After tomorrow, he'd never be able to do so again. So he had to express himself now. You understood. You've been alone like me. But you weren't alone. Maybe you aren't alone even though you're dead. Because you left an impact on so many people. I don't know how you managed to do it. But if someone like you managed it… maybe I could do the same someday. I don't know if I'd be able to put myself out there any time soon. It's hard. And it's scary, that people can leave. You left. Maiko left. I’m leaving to another town, soon, even.

Tears rolled down his cheeks. Morgana had hidden himself in his pocket, and he could feel a comforting purr through the cloth.

It hurts. Losing people. I wish you hadn’t died. I wish you were still here. I wish I was just losing you because I’m moving. I tried to get used to the idea after I learned you were sick. But if I think about it too much, it’s too heavy. Sometimes I wonder if it was worth it to know you, when I’m hurting like this. But you taught me about trying again with people. And you taught me to whistle. And I think those are both good, at least. So I think I’m glad I met you. And I hope you won’t be alone, wherever you are.

He could feel an ache in his chest. Like a hole, or a big wound. Ever since he knew Minato was dying, that ache had grown more pronounced as he faced losing him, despite his attempts to numb himself. But at least he still had the memories. Even something as simple as whistling could sustain that connection, that bond. As long as he didn't forget what Minato had taught him, it was like Minato wasn't fully gone. And the same went for all these other people and the way Minato had affected them. He tried to comfort himself with that idea. But the loss was too raw, too recent. The ache in his chest was ragged and painful to touch. It felt wrong to look away, though. Every time he found himself thinking that he’d have been better off without Minato, guilt swooped in his stomach. He couldn’t bring himself to reject that bond, no matter how much it hurt right now.

Tears rolled down his cheeks as his shoulders began to shake with sobs.

I’ll miss you. I’ll keep whistling, and try to give people second chances, he promised, before he lost himself to his tears entirely and buried his face in his hands

Finally, a hand landed on his shoulder. Akira looked up and saw Jun, his eyes red from his own crying.

Jun opened his arms, and Akira threw himself into them. It hurt so much to lose someone. And it scared him, because what if he lost the few other people in his life? What if something happened to Morgana, or Jun? He slipped a hand into his pocket where Morgana was hidden. The kitten pressed against him with a quiet mrrp.

Jun stroked his hair with a soft hum. “I wish I could bear this pain for you…” he murmured. “But we can remember him together.”

Akira gave a nod against Jun’s ribs, taking a deep breath as he tried to get control of himself.

“Do you want to stay here longer?” Jun asked. “If not, we could go home. Maybe pick up some curry?”

Akira pulled back, looking at Minato once more. There were so many people here. He had given his goodbyes. He wanted to mourn without all these strangers seeing him. He wanted Morgana to be able to stop hiding and talk to him. And curry could be a small, simple comfort.

So he took a deep breath, face still stained with tears, and turned away from the boy laid upon the altar.

Let’s go home, he replied.

Chapter Text

Jun looked down at Akira and Morgana, a small smile on his face. It had been hard ever since Minato's death, for all of them. But he knew in his gut this was the right move, especially now.

“Do we have everything? Mona, you have the list,” he asked.

Morgana looked over the scrawled packing list, going between it and the stack of boxes packed into Jun's car.

He nodded. “Yeah, I think so,” he said.

Akira carefully stroked Morgana's head, before pulling his hands back to sign. I have my things in there, he replied. He gave Jun a slight smile, still tinged with grief like it had been since Minato's passing.

Jun didn't comment on it. He'd sat with Akira some, talked about Minato and about grief in general. But he didn't think constantly harping on it would help. They all needed time.

Instead, he propped his hands on his hip. “Have you both gone to the bathroom?”

Twin nods.

“Alright, do we have snacks?”

More nods.

“Then let's get going.”

They all piled into the car. The previous day had been a mix of packing and saying goodbyes to anyone in town. Jun had his goodbyes, but he didn't know if Akira had anyone or anything to say goodbye to. He didn't ask, just gave him the time to go and do what he needed.

As Jun set out, out of the city and onto highways, Akira and Morgana spread out a map and a printed out sheet of directions, Morgana calling forward directions. Morgana had the AAC device too, or Jun could translate for him to Akira. Since Jun couldn't watch Akira's hands and the road at the same time, Morgana translated for the kid. It was more complicated than most families would have to deal with, but they all wanted this to work. And it did work.

The directions had said the trip would take 5 and a half hours. Jun hadn't factored in the need for breaks to stretch legs and get food and take bathroom breaks. Plus, they'd left late enough in the morning that they had to deal with plenty of traffic.

Morgana stayed focused on the directions, but Akira eventually fell asleep. Jun knew Akira hadn't been sleeping well, both over nerves about the move and from the grief. So Jun and Morgana stayed quiet to not disturb his rest.

A bit of wonder filled his heart as he glanced back at the sleeping boy. Akira trusted him enough to sleep in his presence. Suddenly, a few more of his doubts, doubts that he couldn't do this, that Akira would never trust him, melted away.

Eventually, they reached the town of Inaba, and their new home. Later, there would be more work to do. Jun had a role as substitute teacher at various schools around Inaba and even a few in the nearby Okina city. He could do other temp work to help support his family along the way, too.

There would be more work to do with Akira and Morgana, too. Ensuring Akira had the accommodations he needed. Helping both of them feel more secure with each other and with himself. Someday, he'd need to introduce them to his parents and navigate the feelings brought up by his father's face. Someday, he'd have to have a serious conversation with Akira about his habit of shoplifting, and how it could get him a reputation and more trouble in a small town like this.

More immediately, he'd need to unpack his car, at least to pull out the most necessary boxes to start.

But, for now, Jun carefully gathered the sleeping boy in his arms. Morgana hopped onto his shoulder with a purr.

Together, the three of them walked through the doorway into a new life.