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Afterward, I went to bed and saw you dying in my dreams. At that time, I would always think, everyone must die eventually. I could think of it as you going on an endless journey that I’ll never see the end of—didn’t you always do this? But you were struck in the head by a bullet in a foreign land, and how awful that death must have been. I wanted you to die with dignity, at least with dignity. You would have a grand funeral surrounded by those you love and those who love you, and we could even have Led Zeppelin play at your service. You would have a wife and children; they would kiss you goodbye and become the center of attention at your funeral, while I would just watch you. That’s enough for me, even if I am just a trivial, ordinary part of your life.
I would stay silent, smiling, watching you calmly pass through those quiet decades, silently swallowing the mess of emotions inside. These scenes, I have rehearsed countless times in my dreams.In the 1970s California, Dean went to Vietnam to serve as a soldier, while Sam dropped out of school and formed a band, becoming an anti-war hippie.
the translation of this work:https://archiveofourown.to/works/49436092/chapters/124760428