Chapter Text
“How you doing, pretty girl?” Rip asked with a smile.
“I went back for the ring, but they didn’t have it, so that was sad. How are you doing, cowboy?” I love looking up at him when he’s on his horse.
“Better now you’re back, darlin’. Sorry about the ring, did you get everything else you wanted?” The smile never left his face.
“I did” I couldn’t help the grin on my face when I heard Ryan snicker behind me.
“What are you two hiding?” Rip looked suspicious.
“Nothing that you won’t find out. Oh yeah, I saw the flyers for the fair in town, can we go please?” The excitement is clear in my voice.
“The fair? Like the county fair?” Rip looked at Ryan, confused.
“Yeah, a band she likes is playing tonight too,” Ryan backed me up.
“So you want to spend your last night here at the fair?” I could see the smirk coming to Rip’s lips.
“Yes, please, I think it’ll be nice,” I said, giving him the same puppy dog eyes I had given Ryan earlier.
“Well shit, if thats what you want baby” Rip laughed.
“Everyone listen up”, Rip shouted “My girl here wants to go to the fair tonight. If you want to come, be ready for 6”
“Oh fuck yeah!” Lloyd shouted back.
“Ain’t gonna say no to that”, Colby added.
“Hey Lainey, you wanna go over and ask Tate and my dad?” Kayce asked.
“Yeah sure, I can go and do that now,” I nodded.
“Try and figure out how much Beth has had to drink before you ask her if she’s around,” he spoke quietly.
“There's no way I'm not going to ask her if she’s there, I'll keep an eye on her”, I reassured him.
“Shit, I wish there wasn’t so many reasons for you to be out of my sight today baby” Rip whispered.
“You’ll have me attached to you as soon as you’re done with work. Don’t worry about that, cowboy,” it wasn’t even a lie.
“Countin' down the fuckin’ minutes darlin’”, Rip exhaled heavily.
“Don’t go back to the house until I text you that I'm there?” I asked vaguely.
“Baby, you have me on edge”, Rip laughed.
“It’s nothing bad, I'd just like to be there when you get home,” I bit back a grin.
I'm glad Kayce asked me to do this, it isn’t often I've had the chance to walk along by myself since probably the first week of being here. It’s exactly what I need to try and get my thoughts clearer before I break Rip’s heart tonight.
I keep thinking back to that nervous feeling I had in my stomach about coming here and how I was going to try and fit in somewhere so different from my own home. I can’t pinpoint the exact moment those feelings disappeared, but by the third day, it felt like I'd just always been here. I have spent my entire life searching for a home, and I have finally found it.
“Lainey!” Beth shouted as I came to the end of the field.
“Hey, you good?” I spotted the glass in her hand.
“Fuckin’ rosy, didn’t think I'd see you without Rip wrapped around you today,” She half-teased.
“Me neither. Is your dad home? Came to ask if you guys want to join us at the fair tonight?” I watched her eyes light up.
“The fair? Ain’t been since I was a kid, but fuck yeah I will. He’s in his office,” she lit a cigarette.
I walked in without knocking as Rip wasn’t with me, and well, I'd already spoken to Beth, who was horrified the last time I knocked. I stood in the living room for a minute, taking in the beauty of the place for the last time. This is undoubtedly a dream home for many people, and I was fortunate enough to live here for a while.
“Lainey?” John asked from the doorway of his office.
“Hey John, I was just taking a minute to remember this place”, I laughed awkwardly at being caught.
“Take as long as you want. There will always be a place here for you, sweetheart” He gave me a kind smile.
“Thank you for taking me in the way you did, I know it’s off-putting to have someone walking around with a camera all the time” My eyes landed on an old family portrait, Jamie grinning for the camera.
“You ain’t gotta thank me. Your presence around here is going to be missed more than if it were me leaving,” he laughed.
“Will you take it easy on Rip for a bit?” There was a nervousness to my voice, knowing it wasn’t my place to ask.
“I never take it easy on my wranglers, Lainey, but me Lloyd and I have talked about it. He’ll be fine,” he disappeared into his office for a second before coming back with a glass of whiskey.
“You know, I've known Rip since he was a boy. When he came here, he was no one, had nothing. He worked his damn ass off to get where he is. I put a lot of time into teaching him how to be a man, but your short amount of time here has made him into more of a man than all the years I tried” He lifted his glass to me in a cheers.
“You saved him, he’s so thankful for you, and so am I. For having me here, letting me make a home in your home and for the man I found it with,” I smiled sadly.
“You saved him, Lainey”, John spoke seriously.
“I'm trying not to get emotional until we say our goodbyes tonight,” I half laughed as I wiped away a tear.
“I don’t pity you for that. Who would have thought it?” John laughed.
“Shit, not me I can assure you of that. Is Tate home?” I changed the subject.
“He isn’t home from school yet. Do you need him?” John asked.
“I came over here to let you guys know we’re going to the fair tonight. Kayce wanted to check if you guys wanted to come too.” I watched as he thought it over for a second.
“The fair? Who’s going?” The older Dutton looked thoughtful.
“Why is everyone confused when I say the fair? Isn’t that one of the most American things?” The amusement was clear in my words, “me, Rip, most of the bunkhouse, and Beth said yes too”
“Shit, if Beth’s going I will. What a good idea, the fair,” he nodded his head as he thought.
“Sweet, leaving at six, I think” I headed to the door.
“Thank you again, John. You know I've never really had much of a father figure in my life, you’re the closest I've found” My voice was quieter than I meant it to be.
“I'm glad I could do that for you, Lainey. If I had to list my favourite children, you’d rank higher than some of them,” he nodded his head to the picture of Jamie.
“Sorry about that”, I felt guilty for putting such a wedge in the family.
“Don’t be, he did it all to himself. You know where I'll always be,” he said before I stepped out of the door.
“You gonna have a smoke with me?” Beth asked.
“Didn’t you just have one?” I replied, confused.
“What are you? The fuckin’ nicotine police? Sit down,” Beth pointed to the chair next to her.
“You’re worried about him, huh?” Beth passed me her lighter.
“You heard?” I asked, half amused.
“Big fuckin’ house and zero privacy, daddy is listening to us right now”, she slouched in her chair.
“I know he’ll get over me, but I know how he shuts off. I don’t want him getting hurt or anything when he loses his shit invetiably” I explained.
“Usually, I'd say Rip Wheeler is a big boy and he’ll be fine, but I can see it in him, too. He’s just as dark as us, he’s going to take it hard” Beth took a drag.
“I thought you were going to fucking reassure me or something” I laughed as I exhaled the smoke.
“We’ve not lied to each other before, why start now?” Beth shrugged.
“I'm so fucking jealous of the girl who gets to have him forever” I confessed my thoughts.
“I can tell you one thing for sure, Lainey, he ain’t ever going to touch another girl” She looked at me like I was stupid.
“Don’t be stupid, he has to. He wants a family, and he deserves that” It pained me to say it out loud.
“He wants a family with you, no one else”, Beth spoke matter-of-factly.
“I'll miss you. Don’t think I've ever met another girl whose brain works the same as mine,” I smiled.
“You mean someone as fucked up as you? I feel the same,” she finished off her glass of Tito’s.
“If you’re ever in England, let me know, other than for the release. If you need to chat at any point, you’ve got my number” I didn’t want to lay it on too thick about the drinking.
“We’ll see each other again, they can’t keep two bitches like us apart. Now go on home to your cowboy,” Beth winked.
I took the long walk back over to our house. Rip would be annoyed at me for it because of any possible dangers he isn’t around to protect me from, but he doesn't have to know. My brain is running at a hundred miles per hour, and I need the quiet just to try and settle it for the next few hours.
In past relationships, I've always managed to withdraw myself from them before the end, so I'm used to being alone instead of having to deal with the shock. I even managed it slightly with James, it’s the mental scars that almost killed me from him.
I've been so lost in my thoughts that I've forgotten I need to pack. Fuck. I'm not going to have time to do it in the morning, I need to do it now as fast as possible, so I can spend as much time with Rip as possible.
I kicked myself for taking the longer route as the house finally came into my vision, fastening my pace more than I wanted to. It’s muggy outside today, and I was already sweating a bit before my steps got faster. Maybe wearing Rip’s shirt and vest wasn’t the best choice, but I just wanted to be wrapped up in him.
As soon as I was through the door, I scanned the front room for anything that was mine and just lying around. God, there's more than I expected. I guess I made myself more comfortable here than I realised. At least Rip won’t have to deal with random camera gear on basically every surface anymore.
I scooped it all up and laid it down on the spare bed. I have to organise it all back in my bag so I can check I haven’t left anything behind. Once I ticked that off, I moved onto my clothes in mine and Rip’s bedroom. I kept out an outfit for tonight and my airport outfit for tomorrow, and the rest I folded to the best of my ability.
I spent the next ten minutes walking around and looking on and under every surface to make sure I had got everything. I can just throw out all my toiletries, I don’t need to take them with me, and it means my case will be lighter.
I found Rip’s new Crocs and started putting photos into the correct frames. I wrote a little note on the back of each photo with a date on there, too, just in case any of them go on to have their own families in the future, all the information and names are on there.
I had to be careful when it came to Rip’s. I picked the photo of us with our matching black eyes, and then of our boots and hats to go in the last two frames. Every time I touch the pen to the back of the photo, tears start falling. I wiped them away and put five Polaroid pictures into the back of one of the frames.
I walked downstairs and set the two frames down on the table; the rest of the photos I printed sat next to them. The Crocs I hid on the chair under the table so Rip couldn’t see them until I wanted him to.
I opened the door to go out onto the porch for a smoke and to text Rip. To my surprise, he was just a few metres away, walking towards the house. His shoulders were more hunched over than usual, like he was carrying the weight of the whole world on them. I blinked back the tears at the sight of it.
“What are you doing, cowboy?” I smiled at him.
“Works done for the day, figured I'd wait here until you text me to come in”, he stood in front of the steps up to the porch.
“Look at you being so well behaved”, I teased.
“Anything for my girl”, he smirked “Can I come home now?”
Before I even had a chance to reply to him, Rip was up the stairs, lifting me in his arms. I threw one of my arms around his neck as he carried me over to his chair on the porch. I felt his muscles relax as he held me against him.
“I've been waiting for this all damn day” Rip spoke quietly.
“I missed you today,” I smiled up at him.
“I'm going to miss you every fuckin’ day, pretty girl” he clamped his jaw shut, hard.
“We have the fair to enjoy, and then we can be sad together. Deal? Deal,” I kissed his cheek.
“You and your fuckin’ deals, baby”, he laughed softly.
We sat in silence for a while, Rip’s fingertips drawing circles on my thigh as I played gently with the curls on the back of his head. Our breathing synced as we melted into each other, just us in our little bubble.
“I gotta shower before we go out, baby”, Rip spoke softly.
“Do you have to?” I half joked.
“I smell pretty damn bad, yes I do unfortunately” Rip laughed at my question.
“You never smell bad, it’s like you were born without that feature”, I pouted.
“Come on, darlin’, I wanna see you waiting for me when I get out” Rip lifted me off him.
Rip walked a step ahead of me so he could open the door for me, a gentleman as always. I took a step back when I watched an emotion I couldn’t translate if I wanted to wash over his face as soon as the door opened.
“Rip? What’s wrong?’’ I asked with concern.
“Baby, everything's gone” His words came out struggled as he scanned the room.
“What do you mean, Rip?” Now I was confused.
“All your stuff. It’s fuckin’ gone,” he took his hat off to run his hand through his hair.
“I'm sorry, I packed up earlier” I don’t know what to say to him.
“Don’t be sorry, baby. I just, I can’t, it just shocked me” his voice is barely a whisper.
“Fuck, Rip I didn’t even think. I just got it done. Come on, go get your shower. All my stuff is still in there,” I tried to joke.
“I'll be quick, can’t miss another minute with you, darlin’”, he attempted to compose himself.
I followed him up the stairs, not wanting to leave him for a second. You could feel the sadness in the air, and I felt like the worst person for packing up on my own instead of when Rip could have been here to help me. It’s the little things you don’t consider that can end up having such a big impact on someone.
I sat on the end of the bed for a moment, just staring at the wall, trying to beg my thoughts to leave me alone until we get back to this bedroom later in the evening. It’s clear it isn’t going to work, and my head is going to continue being my own worst enemy, so I ran out of the room to get the dress I kept out for tonight. I threw it on and sat back down before the shower turned off.
“Have I ever told you how much I fancy you?” I smirked at my man stood there with just a towel around his waist.
“Fancy me? You’re turning all British on me already, baby,” Rip joked.
“I'm convinced you were crafted by the cowboy gods or something, you don’t even have to do anything and you drive me fucking wild” I praised him.
“I could say the same about you baby, the most gorgeous girl on this damn planet” his eyes burnt holes into my skin as he looked me up and down.
“As much as I would love to leave the house with shaky legs, we don’t have time. I have something for you downstairs,” I widened my eyes in anticipation.
“Is this the thing you’ve kept secret from me all day, baby?” Rip narrowed his eyes at me.
“Yes, sir, I'll meet you down there. Means you’ll move faster and won’t pin me to the bed,” I poked my tongue out at him as I left the room.
I heard a hearty laugh come from the bedroom as I walked down the stairs. As soon as I hit the bottom step, I got an overwhelming feeling of not knowing what to do with myself, like my body had started to accept this isn’t my home anymore.
Guess I'll just sit at the kitchen table, it feels awkward, but I can’t think of another place to put myself at this moment. My eyes landed on the photo of us both sitting on the table, and you can see the love in our eyes so clearly. Our love was such an instant connection; we both felt it as soon as our skin touched. I mentally kicked myself for not just falling into his arms immediately, instead, we lost time together.
“Hey there, darlin’”, Rip’s voice interrupted my thoughts.
“Hey there, cowboy. I’ve got some things for you,” I pointed to the seat next to me.
“You didn’t have to get me anything, baby” Rip sat down with a grunt.
“I did. I got you these photos, just because you won’t come out of the stone age, so now you can look at them whenever you want, like I can,” I joked.
Rip exhaled deeply as he grabbed the first photo frame, rubbing his thumb over the picture softly. He just nodded his head slowly as a response. I instinctively rubbed small circles on his strong back as he struggled for words. I grabbed the next one to show him, and it was game over as soon as I heard the breath catch in his throat.
“Do you want me to get rid of them? I just thought it would be nice for you to have” I suddenly felt like a prick for upsetting Rip more.
“Thank you, baby. Shit, you’re enough to make a grown man cry” he joked at his own expense.
“Is it a bad time to tell you I find it hot when a man cries?” I tried to lighten the mood.
“Well shit baby, you ain’t gonna be able to keep your hands off me tonight” he joked back.
I took the photo of us both off the table and opened up the back to show him the secret little present I've left for him. One that Ryan would be right in saying isn’t for little eyes…
“Holy shit” Rip’s eyes opened wide.
“Thought that might make you smile”, I grinned at him.
“My dirty fuckin’ girl”, Rip growled.
“Who needs Snapchat when I could just leave you polaroid nudes?” I laughed.
“Snap what?” Rip flipped through the photos.
“Exactly that, cowboy”, I smirked.
“I've got one more thing to give you”, I raised an eyebrow at him.
“Baby, nothing could beat these”, he bit his finger as he couldn’t take his eyes away from the Polaroids.
“Oh, I think this is going to” I bit back my laugh.
I reached my hand under the table to the chair on the end, grabbing the Rip Wheeler essential black Crocs. I was laughing before I even managed to get them out from under the table, which caught Rip’s attention.
“You’re fuckin’ crazy”, Rip joined in on my laughter.
“Just for you, cowboy. I know how much you’ve been secretly wanting to wear mine all this time. Now you have your very own” I handed them over to him.
“Shit, darlin’ I think we had some type of miscommunication” Rip’s laughter filled the room.
“I know you better than you know yourself. Try 'em on!” I urged him.
Rip shook his head as he looked down at them in his hand before standing up. He might actually be about to try them on; that’s more than I ever expected of him with them. I never doubted he would do anything for me, but this just tops that. I can’t believe what I'm about to see.
“They fit perfectly, baby” Rip held onto the chair as he threw his head back with a laugh.
“Oh fuck yeah cowboy, look how well they suit you” I bit my lip to try and seem any type of serious.
“I hope you’ve never questioned how much you have me wrapped around that damn little finger of yours darlin’” Rip walked into the kitchen in them.
“Check the cupboards and freezer whilst you’re in there”, I shouted.
“What’s all this, honey?” Rip looked confused.
“Now you don’t have to go buy any food for a while if you don’t feel like it”, I smiled softly.
“Baby, what am I going to do without you? You didn’t have to do all of this. Thank you,” Rip ran his palm across his face.
“I know, I wanted to. Couldn’t leave here thinking you didn’t have anything in” I took a deep breath at my words.
“Wait right there, darlin’, I got you something too” A childlike smile appeared on Rip’s face.
“Huh? What did you get me? I don’t need anything,” he took me by surprise.
“Just close your eyes, baby. No peeking,” he looked back over his shoulder as he went to the cupboard under the stairs.
“Make sure they’re closed”, Rip whispered as I heard his footsteps move back towards me.
“They are, I promise” A thud on the table made me jump, but I still kept them closed.
“Open your eyes, baby”, Rip instructed me gently.
My jaw fell to the floor when I saw what was sitting in front of me. An Ariat boot box. I looked up at my cowboy with confusion as he nodded for me to open the box. There they were, the boots I fell in love with. The beautiful pink and grey with the initials RW branded onto the inside pull tabs.
“Rip, you shouldn’t have. Wow,” I admired them.
“Couldn’t let my girl walk around without the boots you wanted” He grinned at me as he watched me look at them in amazement.
“There's something else in the box, too, darlin’”, Rip pointed to the bag I hadn’t noticed in my initial shock.
I reached for the plain black bag, confused by the heaviness of the bag in my hands. I looked at Rip with suspicion as I pulled out the two boxes from inside. Both with a logo I know very well from my time on Main Street. I opened the first box and I can’t believe what I'm seeing.
“Rip, how did you manage this?” I looked at him in shock.
“When I went out for a few hours. Went and picked them up for you, ain’t never seen anything as perfect for someone as this” Rip smiled as he admitted his secret.
“I can’t believe it”, I shook my head.
“Try it on, baby, let me see you with it on”, he urged me.
I felt my eyes well up when I looked down at the perfect turquoise lightning bolt on my finger. I don’t think anyone has ever done something so thoughtful for me before. The smile on Rip’s face tells me he’s pretty happy he snuck out to go and get them, too.
“Thank you so fucking much. God, I love you,” I stood and wrapped my arms around his neck.
“I love you, darlin’, least I could do for you”, he whispered into my ear.
“Rip Wheeler, you are the most perfect man to ever walk this planet” I held his head in my hands.
“I'm only here for you, pretty girl” his eyes burned into mine before leaning in for a kiss.
We headed out to the truck to go and pick some of the guys up from the bunkhouse. Not before I managed to get a picture of Rip in his brand new Crocs, though. I had on my new boots, ring and matching earrings Rip had surprised me with. I never feel amazing about the way I look, but the praise Rip gave me, seeing the outfit all together, had me smiling.