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Let's go visit the Trojans for Jeremy's birthday, they said.
It will be so fun, they said.
Yeah right.
Aaron should have just stayed home.
But nooo, Kevin was invited, and Jeremy had specifically asked him to bring the rest of his friends too.
And so, of course, they all had to join him.
It had been doomed from the start. At first, their flight to Los Angeles got delayed twice due to weather. Then it was ultimately cancelled completely, and their new flight had an overnight layover in San Francisco, of all places.
When the flight information was read out, everyone fell quiet for a few seconds. Three of their five-person group had a bunch of complicated baggage related to that general area, so they should have just called it quits then.
Aaron wasn’t keen on being back where he grew up. San Jose would be way too close for comfort if they were to stay in San Francisco. Not to mention that it would be Andrew’s childhood city, which he wasn’t keen on visiting either.
And as far as Aaron knew, Neil had lost his mom on one of the beaches there.
They should have just tried to get a different flight.
Instead, they all decided to push through and grit their teeth. The flight itself was already hell, Aaron either holding onto Nicky or even Kevin for support every time the plane rumbled softly.
That he was getting closer and closer to the place where he spent his childhood did not help the heavy feeling that had settled in his stomach.
But it was fine, they would just get a hotel close to the airport and leave on their early morning flight. It would be as if they were never even here.
When about 20 minutes of flight time were left, the speakers above them crackled to life.
“Dear passengers, due to the worsening weather conditions, more flights have been grounded than previously anticipated. We have just been informed that the San Francisco airport is at full capacity, and we will be rerouted to San Jose instead. More details on the available amenities will be given shortly.”
Great. Absolutely perfect.
Out of his peripheral he could see that Nicky had slowly turned towards him, but he kept his eyes fixed ahead of him. He wasn't going to make a big deal out of this now. Sure, it would be the first time he was back there since they moved away when he was about 13, but it was fine.
Again, they were only going to stay in a hotel anyway.
Technically.
But this trip was simply cursed. And Kevin fainted at the airport.
Just like that, no warning.
One minute, they were trying to find the exit leading to the shuttle buses, and the next, there was a thump, and Kevin was just lying there. Aaron immediately checked his vitals, only feeling silly for it after making sure Kevin was quite obviously still alive. He turned him on his side and watched his breathing until the paramedics arrived. Everyone got increasingly more nervous the longer it took Kevin to regain consciousness, which was about 5 minutes.
That was too long not to be concerning, so they decided a visit to the hospital was in order. Just to let them run a few quick tests to make sure Kevin was fine and this was just a fluke.
Aaron would have preferred to spend the night in a hotel room instead of a bright hospital waiting area, but at least this way, his mind was distracted. There was no need to think about where exactly he was right now; he could spend that time worrying about Kevin instead.
And in a few hours, he would be gone again.
At least that’s what he told himself as he desperately tried not to think about his old childhood friends, hopefully still walking around somewhere, just living their lives. He wondered if the little shop down the road with the nice cashier still existed. He would let Aaron buy an ice cream on the way back from school, no matter how much money he had with him. The big dog that he saw every morning on his way to school when he passed by his neighbour’s garden definitely wasn’t there anymore, so no need to think about it.
He had kept himself distracted by staying with Kevin throughout most of his examinations.
In part because it was interesting to him from a medical perspective and in part because he could tell how nervous Kevin was. He wasn’t the best at reassuring people, but he tried his best to calm Kevin down and assure him that he was probably fine. It was good practice for his bedside manner.
So far, every test and examination had yielded normal results, and Kevin himself was feeling completely fine again as well. Aaron had the sneaking suspicion that Kevin simply hadn’t eaten enough and fainted after going from sitting for hours to walking around.
And now that everything was pretty much done, Kevin was fine again, and the only thing left to do was wait for the results of the last blood tests, it quickly got boring.
And boredom wasn’t good. That meant thinking.
The waiting area was nice enough, but he got stir crazy immediately.
Which was why he volunteered to go to the cafeteria and get something to eat for everyone. Neil joined him on his quest, since that guy could also not sit still for the life of him. They were already on their way back, both holding bags with sandwiches, when Aaron's attention was directed to the giant picture frame on the wall next to him.
He smiled softly when he saw that it was holding an entire year's worth of newborn baby pictures. Above the pictures, the number 1998 was displayed in colourful paper. It was so meticulously made, each picture of a baby was accompanied by a tiny handwritten note that read the date, time and name of the child.
What a cute idea.
Aaron wasn't entirely sure yet in which direction of medicine he wanted to go exactly, but paediatrics was high on the list. Helping the most vulnerable group of people was something he felt could be immensely fulfilling. He would, however, have to go through some more therapy before he could stand the sight of an injured child without his heart rate picking up like crazy.
The people who put these frames together must have been really proud of their job.
One look along the hallway confirmed that more of these giant picture frames were hung up in both directions. Each one contained an entire batch of babies born in that respective year.
Neil had stopped a few steps ahead, waiting impatiently.
“Are you coming?”
Aaron rolled his eyes. He didn't like to be hurried. Least of all by Neil.
“Yeah, yeah. I was just looking at this for a second, don’t rush me.”
Neil looked at the frame beside him for a second, but didn't seem all that interested.
“Okay, are you done?”
“Ugh, yes. Let’s go.”
They had just started walking again when Neil spoke up, eyes still fixed on the frames lining the wall next to them.
“Where were you born again?”
Rolling his eyes, he was about to tell him off, not wanting to talk about this with Neil. When he suddenly realised what Neil was implying.
He was born in San Jose
He and Andrew both were, obviously.
He stopped dead in his tracks, Neil halting next to him, with an almost concerned frown on his face.
By now, they were standing next to 2005.
“There’s no way... There are so many hospitals here, it’s- no. It’s impossible.”
He was talking more to himself, his mumbling becoming more frantic as he turned and looked behind himself. The year numbers were declining in that direction.
Then he took off down the hall, eyes wide and scanning the numbers above the frames.
There was no way.
Out of all the hospitals.
Maybe the years don't even go that far back.
He passed by 1998 again.
Neil said something from behind him, but he couldn't hear it over the pounding in his ears.
Nope, no way.
1991
1990
1989
He slowed to a walk, already looking past the next two frames.
They fucking have 1986.
But still. That didn’t mean anything.
The chance was small. So extremely small.
As if.
He hesitated on the last few steps. This was stupid; he was getting his hopes up for nothing.
1986 seemed to have been a baby-heavy year; the frame was absolutely filled to the brim. He scanned over them, the pictures were usually sorted in chronological order, so November would be towards the bottom of the frame. His eyes were too frantic; he couldn’t focus properly.
It was useless anyway. Nothing would be there. He wouldn’t get that lucky. San Jose was a giant city; this would be like finding a needle in a haystack, unintentionally. A soft gasp made him stop his scanning, instead turning to Neil.
After swallowing hard, Neil glanced at him for a second before his eyes fixed on the frame again, and he lifted a finger to point at it. Aaron followed Neil's movement slowly.
And then he saw it.
4th November was written in the corner of the picture.
Two newborns, dressed in a baby blue and yellow onesie with matching hats.
They were lying, turned towards each other, their foreheads touching. Eyes closed and skin red, this must have been very shortly after birth. From under their hats, you could see the faintest hint of blond locks peeking out.
And underneath, a nicely written note.
Andrew 10:13 pm
&
Aaron 10:15 pm
The letters started swimming, the picture becoming a blurry mess. And although Aaron tried his best to blink the tears away, new ones simply kept on coming.
He didn't want to cry. Not over something as silly as a picture. Especially not in front of Neil.
But how could he not?
He barely had any pictures of his childhood. His mother only took some whenever she was doing better, which wasn’t often. He had seen about two pictures of Andrew as a child.
And now, a picture of the day he was born, of the day they were born. A childhood picture of them together, like it should have been.
Something about the fact that these two sleeping babies would be separated soon, and not remember this moment, not remember each other, was breaking his heart.
They didn’t even know all the shit they would have to go through in the coming years.
His barely contained crying turned into sobs, and he felt like his throat was closing up. He couldn’t breathe properly. A hesitant hand landed on his back, slowly rubbing soothing circles.
“Aaron?”
He turned towards Neil. He could barely stand the guy, just tolerating him for Andrew’s sake. But his need for any kind of comfort was bigger than any dislike he might harbour towards him.
Ideally, Nicky would be here right now.
Even more ideally, Andrew.
But as it was, he raised his shaking arms and turned, hoping that Neil would understand and not reject him. He was wrapped in a tight hug, a hand in his hair, as he sobbed into Neil’s shirt.
Through his sobs, he could tell that Neil was talking to someone. If he had to guess, it was most likely someone from the hospital staff. He was probably making quite a scene right now.
Not that he could stop it at all.
The others were getting impatient in the waiting room. How long does it take to get some food? They looked up when the door opened, but it was just a woman in scrubs who stepped inside. Their annoyance at the lack of food was quickly squashed when she spoke.
“Does anyone here belong to someone named Aaron?”
They immediately shot up, now alerted. That wasn’t a good sign. Nicky found his words first, his voice panicked.
“Yeah, why? Did something happen to him?”
“His friend is asking for you to come and help calm him down. For a lack of a better word, he seems inconsolable. And we would really like to keep the public crying to a minimum, for the sake of our patients.”
Andrew was already in motion when Kevin actually asked for their location.
“Inconsolable? What? Where are they?”
“They are one floor down in the hallway to the cafeteria.”
The three of them practically flew down the stairs. What in the world could have prompted Aaron to have a public meltdown with only Neil nearby? A few concerned people were standing in the hallway leading up to the cafeteria, looking worried. They rounded the corner and saw them. It wasn't something any of them ever imagined seeing. Neil was holding Aaron in his arms, one hand petting his hair, while Aaron was clinging to him and shaking.
They were with them instantly, Kevin and Nicky loudly freaking out.
“What the fuck happened?”
“Aaron? Aaron, honey, what's going on?”
At his cousin's voice, Aaron lifted his head. His entire face was a splotched red, cheeks wet with tears and eyes puffy. He managed exactly one word between his hiccups.
“Nicky.”
And then his face was hidden again, this time in Nicky's shirt. Nicky immediately wrapped him in a hug and looked around, before stopping on Neil. He opened his mouth, but Andrew’s question was faster.
“What happened to him? Where are they?”
Andrew was on high alert, eyes narrowed as he looked around. He was convinced that someone must have hurt his brother.
Why else would he be acting like this?
Neil just shook his head softly and lifted his hand again, pointing towards the picture. The three newcomers followed his movement.
Both Kevin and Nicky gasped once their eyes found the picture.
They turned towards Andrew, who was staring at it blankly. It was almost like he was uninterested, if not for the way he was clenching his jaw. Neil stepped next to him, watching him carefully.
“Andrew…”
Even Aaron quieted down at the mention of his brother's name, quietly sniffling and turning to look at him. It felt like an eternity of silence before Andrew finally spoke up.
“Knew it. I’m older.”
*
Aaron had been moved to some chairs further down the hallway. It had taken a little while, but by now, he wasn’t crying anymore. He just looked miserable and worried. Nicky had been with him for a bit, just holding his hand and consoling him, until he got up to look for Andrew, who had left to go for a smoke.
Kevin had jumped in once Nicky left, which made this experience even more awkward. He had very hesitantly grabbed hold of Aaron's hand, and Aaron just let him. He was happy for any amount of comfort he could get.
After all, he wasn’t going to get it from Andrew, it seemed.
He couldn’t for the life of him figure out what his brother was thinking.
Why had he left so quickly?
Was he embarrassed by the way Aaron had reacted?
It was a bit of an overreaction in hindsight.
Aaron groaned and rubbed at his face with his free hand. His cheeks were still warm, and although he had stopped crying, his face was probably still a mess.
“You okay, Aaron?”
Kevin was speaking quietly, almost hesitantly. As if he barely knew how to console someone. Or at least Aaron.
“Yeah. I was just being stupid. “
“I don’t think so. I feel like that reaction was pretty understandable.”
Wow, compassion from none other than Kevin Day.
“Well, Andrew clearly didn’t-
“Andrew is Andrew. You know full well that his reactions to things can be …unconventional.”
He was surprised to hear Kevin say something like that about Andrew, and just stared at him. As if he had been summoned, Andrew materialised next to them before Aaron could say anything.
“Not any more unconventional than you two suddenly holding hands with each other. Can you put the date on pause and let me speak with my brother, Kevin?”
Kevin flinched terribly at the sound of Andrew’s voice, but still waited for Aaron to nod to let go and leave down the hallway. A thick and heavy silence settled over them after Andrew had sat down. As much as he wanted them to talk about it, Aaron had no clue where to even start. Instead of saying anything, he nervously fiddled with his hands, not looking up from them.
After the quiet got too much for him, he gave in and cleared his throat.
Well, might as well say what I think he wants to hear.
“Um…I’m sorry.”
Andrew looked over at him, eyebrows raised just slightly.
“Sorry for what?”
Good question. He wasn’t sure exactly, but he got the feeling that he had done something wrong.
Reacted incorrectly.
When he didn’t answer, Andrew spoke again. His voice was so calm, it was almost creepy.
“You cried.”
Very matter of fact, no mocking in his tone.
“I did.”
“Why?”
He wrung his hands more before putting his palms on his thighs and rubbing them slowly. Looking over at Andrew was not an option, so he kept staring down.
Why am I so fucking nervous and freaked out?
“It’s just- I almost feel disconnected from the babies in the picture. They’re us, but also just some … really unfortunate kids. And I can see their future and can’t do anything to stop it. And ….I don’t know. It just feels- it feels bad.”
Andrew stayed quiet for a few more seconds before responding.
“Thinking about all the what-ifs has never helped anyone. But you’re right- It’s really fucking hard not to.”
He was surprised at Andrew’s words and finally looked over at him.
Andrew met his eyes with a sombre expression.
“But we managed. We found our way back to each other. It just took a bit.”
Oh, Aaron wanted to cry again.
He couldn’t say anything for fear of breaking down, so instead he just nodded, his hands flinching at his side.
Andrew looked down at them. And absolutely blew Aaron's mind with his next words.
“You want a hug?”
Fuck yes.
Aaron nodded again, staring in disbelief, and the moment Andrew spread his arms, he fell into them, squeezing hard.
Andrew was a bit stiff, but squeezed back nonetheless, his arms tightening around Aaron. He wasn’t as good at hugging as Nicky, and it felt weirdly awkward.
But it was simultaneously the best hug he had ever gotten in his life.
Aaron always ran cold, his toes and fingertips freezing, and he wouldn’t say he was a very warm and comforting person overall. For some reason, he had always assumed that it must be the same for Andrew. But he had been wrong; Andrew was so warm in his arms. He pressed his face into his shoulder, the dark fabric of his shirt smelling like smoke. He normally couldn’t stand it, but right now, the smell reminded him of comfort and safety.
They sat there for what felt like forever, holding each other. At some point, Andrew even leaned into the hug more, resting his head against Aaron's. He never fully relaxed, but when Aaron had tried to pull away, Andrew hadn’t let him, so it couldn’t be all that bad for him. Once they actually let go, Aaron sat back and had to wipe his face again.
“That was the cutest thing I have ever seen.”
Of course, Nicky had been watching them. He came over, both Neil and Kevin trailing behind.
“That picture of you two as babies is a close second, though.”
“Eh, newborns look weird.”
They all stared at Kevin, who looked back in confusion.
“What? It's true.”
Deciding to ignore Kevin, Nicky crouched down in front of Aaron.
“Are you better now?”
His cousin looked worried, so Aaron tried to muster a weak smile while nodding.
A staff member stopped next to them, looking them over.
“Excuse me, is everything okay?”
She was looking at Aaron, who must have looked horrible, for random staff members to stop and check in on him. Before anyone could say anything, Andrew spoke up.
“We’re fine. My little brother just had to take a minute.”
They all snapped their heads over to Andrew, who had delivered that so casually, as if he was always walking around calling Aaron his little brother. Aaron was flushing to high heaven, gaping at Andrew, who acted as if he had just told them the weather.
“What? Would you prefer baby brother? Your choice.”
Again, spoken with almost pure boredom.
Before Aaron could respond, Nicky piped up, thankfully changing the topic to something less mortifying.
“Wait. Actually, we had a question regarding those pictures. Is there a possibility you still have some more from back then?”
He pointed at the frame. It was a stupid question, and Aaron stepped in.
“Nicky, don’t bother her. She has enough to do. It's been more than twenty years, I'm pretty sure there's nothing here from back then.”
At his words, the nurse chuckled softly.
“Oh, don’t be too sure about that. Why? Is one of you on here?”
She looked delighted and scanned over their faces. Nicky took over again, pointing two fingers at the twins.
“Yeah, those two. They don’t really have a lot of pictures of their childhood, so we thought maybe there was a chance there would be more here?”
Guilt tripping with the sob story. That was rare, since within the foxes, they all had so much baggage that no one would dare to try playing trauma-Olympics. But for normal people like this nurse, that just might work. She looked over all of them, at Aaron's tear-streaked face, and they could see the exact moment her eyes softened, and her smile turned almost pitying.
“I would have to check in storage. I can't guarantee anything, but there could still be some stuff. The bench you're sitting on has been here since the seventies, you know.”
It worked. They might walk out of this with actual childhood photos of both of them.
They had to show her their IDs to confirm they were, in fact, Aaron and Andrew Minyard, and not impostor twins, and she led them to an empty room with a table. It seemed to be some sort of meeting room, and Aaron felt uncomfortable intruding like this.
He, of all people, should know how stressful their job was, and not add on to it. Kevin seemed to notice his inner struggle.
“She was happy to do it, Aaron. Calm down.”
“I know, I know. Still.”
He was also not sure how he would react if she found anything else. Of course, he would be happy, but could his weak heart handle it?
They all flinched when the door opened, and the woman came back in, carrying a dusty box. She set it down on the table and started to go through it, before finding what she was looking for and pulling out a folder.
His heart started beating faster in anticipation. The urge to grab Andrew's hand was big, but he wouldn’t; the hug earlier was already such a huge gesture, he wouldn’t push his luck now.
She opened the folder, and multiple pictures slid out. One was blurry, but the other three were clear as day. One of them was identical to the one in the frame, foreheads touching, eyes closed. One of the few times they had been that close to each other. The other one showed them both crying. Kevin had been right, newborns were kind of ugly. Lying there, red-faced, and screaming their little heads off. And still, Aaron was so grateful to whatever gods had allowed him to find his picture.
In the last one, they were lying a bit more apart, but holding each other's hands, as much as a newborn could, anyway. He wasn’t sure if someone put their hands together or if they just grabbed each other by themselves. Babies do have a grabbing reflex, after all.
Aaron loved each of these pictures. He pulled them closer, staring at them.
Fuck, he was going to cry again.
One glance at Andrew revealed his face to be as impassive as ever, if not for the tenseness in his shoulders and the slight softness in his eyes. After they had looked their fill, Aaron pushed the pictures across the table to where the others were sitting, who all picked them up curiously.
He managed a quiet sentence, his voice raw from all the crying.
“You were right, Kevin. We might not have been the cutest.”
Kevin grinned his lopsided smile at him while Nicky protested vehemently. But he didn’t count, Nicky was practically their parent, and parents always think their kids are the cutest.
Not that he could tell Nicky that.
And then the nurse spoke again. Aaron had completely forgotten about her. And what she said made his stomach sink.
“There's also your record from when you were born.
What?
They all stared at her.
Aaron didn’t want to see that.
Of course, he was insanely curious, wanting to know everything he could about himself. On the other hand, he didn’t need to know anything, not wanting to spend a second thinking about it.
Because Aaron was frozen in place, Andrew reached out with one hand and took the open folder. He held it up between them, looking at Aaron for a few seconds, before both of them turned to the paper in front of them.
Mother: Tilda Minyard (First-time parent)
Father: -
Of course there would be no name for their father.
It wasn’t clear to him if what he was feeling was relief or disappointment. He skimmed over useless facts like prenatal care until something piqued his interest again.
Method of delivery:
-Caesarean
Made sense, that was pretty common with twins.
Complications experienced by birth parent associated with labour and delivery:
-Blood transfusion
-Unplanned hysterectomy
Huh, his mom had never mentioned it.
Then again, it was for the best; he couldn’t imagine having any more siblings. Would they have suffered like him? Would they have ended up in foster care like Andrew?
He had been scared about that at some point.
That there might have been more children. Aaron barely remembered anything until maybe age seven. There could have been more pregnancies before that that he simply never knew of. He had scared himself with that thought, because that would have implied that he was the only one she kept.
And shouldn’t that make him grateful? That even though his childhood was mostly miserable, he was special in some weird way.
He already felt bad enough about that with Andrew; he couldn’t have handled it if there were more siblings out there who would all hate him for that.
He saw Andrew’s grip on the paper tightening, and looked down to the last column of text that was left on the page.
Substance use during pregnancy:
- Use of tobacco during pregnancy
-Use of alcohol during pregnancy
Use of Illicit drugs during pregnancy:
- cannabis
- Hallucinogens (MDMA, Ectasy, LSD)
- cocaine
His heart stopped for a second.
He should have expected it, he really should.
He had.
But in the back of his mind, he had always held out hope that she would have at least held back during pregnancy.
Wait.
Reading it again, he realised the list was notably missing some of her favourites.
The wildest thought suddenly crossed his mind and formed into words before he could think better of it.
“Wow, she didn’t even take heroin or meth while pregnant? Crazy.”
He could feel the way everyone tensed, and Andrew turned towards him. He hadn’t meant to say it at all, least of all with such an honestly impressed voice.
He couldn’t bear to look at anyone. Didn’t want to see the horror on Nicky's face, the shock on the nurses', and the disappointment on Andrew’s.
He kept his eyes on the table below him, starting to sweat.
“I didn’t- didn’t mean-“
“Are you done reading? Can I flip it?”
He flinched at Andrew's voice, it sounded strained, like he had to try hard not to yell at Aaron.
What is wrong with me? Why did I say that?
The best he could manage was a weak nod, and Andrew turned the paper a bit too aggressively.
Newborn medical records
This was it.
He swallowed thickly, fidgeting with his hands in his lap.
He didn’t need to be nervous. They were sitting here, healthy and alive. So, nothing it could say would change anything, right?
Plurality of birth: Twins
Birth order:
Baby A: Andrew Joseph Minyard
Baby B: Aaron Michael Minyard
He had wondered before where their middle names came from; he wished he had asked Tilda when he still could.
Birthweight:
Baby A: 1.570 grams/ 3lbs 5oz
Baby B: 1.511 grams/ 3lbs 3oz
Andrew suddenly spoke up.
“Is that weight normal?”
Aaron thought he was asking the nurse, but Andrew had turned to him.
That felt weirdly nice, since he thought Andrew hadn’t been listening when he mentioned thinking about doing paediatrics. He had only been visiting the basic courses anyway, and couldn’t remember all the numbers that well.
“Um, not sure. I think it’s a bit lower than average?” He turned to the nurse, who was sorting through the rest of the box. “Is 3 lbs 5oz a normal birth weight?”
She looked up, the question taking a second to register. “Oh no, that’s really small.”
Ah, of course.
It should have been funny, they had always been small, hadn’t they? But no one was laughing. He thanked her and turned back to the paper.
Apgar score
Oh, he knew that one.
He felt stupid for how excited he got to recognise something from his courses. That had even been on the exam last semester.
Before Andrew could ask, he answered, almost too eagerly.
“They do that after the birth to check five vital categories: breathing, pulse, muscle, skin colour and reflexes of the baby. Each one of the categories gets two points if it's as it should be, one if it's not that good and zero if it's missing or abnormal. So, if the baby’s at 8 to 10 points, it’s healthy.
He had recited that like reading out of a textbook, feeling way too proud of himself. To avoid all of their stares at his little display, he opted to read the next lines.
Score at 5 minutes:
Baby A: 5
Baby B: 4
Oh, those were bad scores. Really bad.
Right, this wasn’t an exam; this was their actual life.
8 to 10 would be perfect.
6 to 8 was a not fully healthy baby.
And anything under 6 was a baby that was so poorly, it needed help.
The document continued, uncaring of Aaron's emotional state.
If score is less than 6, renewed score at 10 minutes:
Baby A: 7
Baby B:7
At least they improved marginally within the next minutes.
Gestation at delivery:
36 weeks (preterm)
“We weren’t even that early. Just a week.”
That was quite surprising. Being twins and in bad health, he would have expected them to be born way earlier.
Abnormal conditions of newborn:
That one would hurt, wouldn’t it?
Small for gestational age:
-Baby A
-Baby B
NICU admission:
-Baby A
-Baby B
Again, made sense. Twin babies, a bit premature, of course they would go to the NICU.
Assisted ventilation required immediately after birth:
-Baby B
Oh, alright.
Aaron wasn’t breathing when he was born. He heard Andrew’s breath hitch and knew he had just read that too. No need to get upset over it though; he was breathing fine now after all.
And then…
Withdrawal symptoms
-Baby A
-Baby B
Aaron stared at the word.
Withdrawal.
It made sense, obviously, with the whole 5-course menu of substances she put in her body, how could they have been anything other than addicted at birth?
Still, seeing the word on paper felt like a punch to the gut.
That had been the last point on the document. The bottom of the page simply contained a few notes for possible future issues they should be getting check-ups for. More as suggestions to keep in mind for any doctor that might see this.
Future screenings for:
- deficiencies in physical growth and intellectual/ behavioural development
-changes in brain development/ function
Well, wouldn’t that have been great to know earlier?
He couldn’t remember ever being taken to a doctor.
Andrew let the paper slip from his hands, and balled them into fists. Aaron just stared ahead at the table.
It was quiet for a few seconds, then a loud bang rang out as Andrew slammed his fist onto the table in anger.
Out of sheer surprise, Aaron flinched terribly at the loud noise, looking over at Andrew with wide eyes.
And Andrew, in a wave of sudden serenity and calmness, turned towards him.
“Sorry. Didn’t want to scare you.”
With that, he stood up and simply walked out.
Aaron swallowed hard.
What the fuck?
Why had they even agreed to read this?
The others had snatched the paper up and were skimming it, and Aaron was left staring after Andrew.
His eyes filled with tears again. Why was he crying so much today?
He heard how one by one, they made varying noises of upset, before a chair creaked, and Nicky was behind him, hugging him carefully.
“Hey, hey. It's okay.”
He leaned back into the hug for a few moments before he came to the conclusion that he needed to be with Andrew right now, and stood up. His legs felt shaky, but he couldn’t care less.
Halfway to the door, Neil's voice reached him.
“I don’t think he wants to see anyone right now.”
Without looking back, he opened the door.
“I know. Don’t care.”
Which was a lie. He cared, didn’t he? He cared too much.
Just like Andrew had cared too much and almost killed him in that bathroom.
Or himself in that car crash, trying to protect Aaron.
Or himself in juvie, trying to protect Aaron.
Or himself on Thanksgiving, trying to protect Aaron.
He ran along the hallways, trying to find an exit. The moment he spotted a side door, he was sure that he would be there. Call it twin intuition or whatever.
But he slammed that door open, and immediately spotted Andrew sitting on the curb, a cigarette between his fingers, head bowed.
He slowly walked over and sat down as quietly as he could, trying not to startle Andrew.
“I'm sorry. I know you want to be alone. But…I don’t want to be alone right now.”
He knew that Andrew understood what he meant. Not alone in general. Without Andrew.
He was being selfish, but he couldn’t help himself.
Andrew didn’t look at him, just staring at the ground in front of him. Aaron crossed his arms and did the same.
After a few minutes, he couldn’t stop the sniffle that escaped him, and he wiped his sleeve over his eyes.
He was so stupid. So weak.
Andrew's arm wrapped itself around his shoulder, pulling him against Andrew's side.
He looked over and forgot to breathe for a second.
Andrew's face was as impassive and somehow simultaneously intense as always.
But his eyes were red-rimmed, and his eyelashes and cheeks were wet.
That just made Aaron cry more, and he leaned closer to Andrew. They sat in silence for a while. The cigarette was long discarded on the floor and stepped out, only halfway done.
Andrew's voice was shaky when he spoke.
“That was so fucked up.”
He could be referring to so many things, but it was true in any of those cases. Everything that happened to them, since before they were even born, was fucked up.
He nodded softly.
“We didn’t deserve that.”
“We didn’t.”
They stared at each other, and Aaron remembered Andrew’s words from earlier.
Regardless of what happened, they found each other in the end.
Andrew shook out another cigarette and lit it. Aaron didn’t smoke, as he wasn’t a big fan of the taste and smell of it. The irony in that wasn’t lost to him. That he had been fine with hard drugs but drawn the line at cigarettes, even as a teen.
But at least in a casual way, he could smoke if so desired. When he was drunk or really stressed, for example.
And right now, he was so stressed. He held out his hand, and was mildly surprised when Andrew actually gave him the lit cigarette, so they could share. He felt inexplicably grateful.
This whole day had been a mess, so he needed something to take the edge off.
They smoked in silence, and only after they were done did Andrew speak again.
“Sorry. I should be setting a good example as a big brother and not turn you into a smoker.”
Aaron fixed Andrew with the most unimpressed stare he could muster.
“You're never going to let that go now, aren’t you?”
The corner of Andrew's mouth quirked for just a second, and his voice was smug when he answered.
“Nope. I need to make up for all the years I couldn’t.”
Now, Aaron smiled; it was small and weak, but it was there. After rolling his eyes, more for show than anything else, he went to get up.
“Let's go back to the others.”
They thanked the nurse profusely. She even let them keep the pictures and a copy of the records. They had originally declined on the records, not wanting a reminder of that whole mess, but Nicky had insisted. He had a point; it could be important for the future, for doctor's visits or whatever, so they agreed.
Before they left, Nicky forced them to take a picture in front of the big frame, both of them standing on either side of their baby selves.
They both probably looked terrible, exhausted, and clearly having cried earlier, but Nicky didn’t care. And the way Nicky’s eyes were sparkling told him that this picture would be hanging in their living room the moment they got back.
Even worse, he had the sneaking suspicion that they were about to receive a whole barrage of matching items, and all of his would be yellow. Why did Andrew get to be baby blue?
He had almost forgotten the original reason for their hospital visit, but it was as Aaron had thought. All of Kevin's tests came back showing he was in perfect health, and it was concluded he simply hadn’t eaten and slept enough.
Kevin could count himself lucky with everything else that had happened here at the hospital.
If they hadn’t gotten the opportunity to find out so much about themselves, they would absolutely have been pissed at Kevin for this unnecessary detour. Just because he couldn’t take care of himself and actually remember to eat.
After crashing at the hotel for what little time they had left, it was unsurprisingly easy for Aaron to sleep through their next flight. At least mostly. Turbulence still left his clawing into his seat.
He thought the worst was behind him, and no more emotionally taxing situations were waiting.
Oh, how wrong he had been.
It was just a different kind of taxing than he could have ever anticipated. So different.
A new kind of torture started for Aaron here in L.A.
They had just arrived at the Trojans’ dorms, where quite a few of them were already waiting outside, ready to greet them. Aaron wasn’t familiar with most of them, but he knew Jeremy.
Obviously, who didn’t?
Jeremy and Jean had been over to visit earlier this year already. Aaron was happy for Kevin that he had managed to rekindle some kind of friendship with Jean. One where they went out of their way to visit each other. And Aaron had to admit, he got along rather well with both of them.
Jeremy wasn’t that similar to him, personality-wise, but they both liked the same video games, and even better, Jeremy was really good at them. Finally, an actual challenge for Aaron.
And according to the people around them, he and Jean were both rather similar when it came to their overall attitude. Something they both vehemently denied.
Jeremy ran over and hugged Kevin, before greeting them all excitedly, and turning back towards the rest of his team, who were walking over. He pointed at Kevin.
“So, that’s Kevin, who you all obviously know. That’s Neil, you also know him. This is Andrew, the goalie, and that’s his-“
“-little brother, Aaron. Just so you know, if any of you mess with my baby brother, I will hurt you. So, watch yourselves.”
Andrew had delivered that movie-ready speech so seriously, it made it even more humiliating. Everyone was just staring at Andrew's completely impassive face, eyes wide in confusion. No one spoke for a full minute; neither the Foxes nor the Trojans knew what to do with Andrew's threat.
Aaron had gone fully red next to him, wishing the ground would swallow him up.
Nicky and Neil both started laughing, Kevin following shortly after. That should have probably been his cue to say something, anything, but he couldn’t get a word out.
Andrew just glanced at them in mild annoyance, as if he didn’t understand why they were laughing at all. And then he turned to Jeremy and doubled down.
“Got it? You're the captain, you're responsible for your team.”
Aaron was watching helplessly as Jeremy held his hands up in an appeasing gesture, amusement glinting in his eyes.
“Of course. You heard him. Everyone, be nice to baby brother Aaron!”
Why must they do this to him?
The laughter around him intensified, and Andrew simply nodded one short, sharp nod at Jeremy before shouldering past him to walk inside.
They all gathered their luggage to follow him with laughter. Except for Aaron, who didn’t even look at anyone, and was left fighting the urge to punch Nicky when he threw an arm around his shoulder. He didn’t fight the urge when it came to Neil and kicked him in the leg when he passed him by.
Sadly, it didn’t seem to have hurt enough to dampen his amusement.
Andrew had too much power, which seemed to have gone to his head all at once. He was probably also having too much fun with it, even though he was doing a great job hiding it.
The others had calmed by the time they got to the common room, where they would be setting up camp. Aaron and Andrew were just getting out their sleeping bags when Nicky, who had been forgotten during introductions due to the unforeseen circumstances, had to reopen the jar of worms.
“I'm Nicky, by the way. I'm the cousin of those two balls of sunshine. So, if you mess with either of them, you're going to have to deal with me. And trust me, you do not want that.”
He pointed at the twins, a grin on his face, happy to keep the running gag going.
Jeremy glanced down at Aaron before looking back at Nicky.
“Don’t worry, we are all very nice. But I have to say, Aaron, you are truly well protected. Kevin, are you also protecting someone?”
Kevin seemed to be caught off guard by the question and looked over at Aaron for a second. Before he could add to his humiliation, Aaron crossed the room to stand in front of Kevin, holding up a hand in his face.
“No, he isn’t. Actually, I'm the one who’s protecting him. I mean, just look at him, so small and helpless.”
He didn’t let himself be deterred by Kevin's offended face and reached up to pat his cheek a few times. He heard a few people chuckle, and was greatly satisfied when he looked down to see Andrew actually smiling, looking amused.
After they had settled that, they were on their way to the dining hall when he caught up to Andrew.
“Hey.”
Andrew looked over to him with feigned neutrality, as if he hadn’t just pulled an entire stunt on him. He felt like he already knew the answer, but he still had to ask.
“Are you going to do that a lot from now on?”
His voice was pained, and Andrew just looked at him, unimpressed.
“Yep.”
He sighed in defeat.
“Do you have to?”
“Yep.”
He was not budging on that, and honestly, it could be worse. Aaron was equally as endeared as embarrassed by it. Well, probably a bit more embarrassed, but still.
“Ugh, if you must. But I’ll never refer to you as my older brother, we’re twins for fucks sake.”
Andrew hummed, as if he didn’t believe Aaron. “We’ll see about that.”
As if.
Aaron would never.
Well, maybe. Sometimes.
He sighed again, annoyed at his own weak will.
“Nothing to see. I won't do it.”
“Suuure.”
Great. Andrew had already looked right through him.
“You are the worst, you know that?”
“The worst and the first. Born, that is.”
He got the overwhelming urge to shove him, but held back. Instead, he crossed his arms and tried to look at Andrew as annoyed as he could.
Andrew shot him another slightly bemused look, and Aaron mustered up the most carefree and over-the-top sweet voice he could, and turned to the next best person within his vicinity. It just so happened to be Jean.
“Did you hear that? Isn't my big brother so hilarious?”
And with those way too loud and frankly cringeworthy words, he turned on his heel and hurried away to get something to eat. Which left Andrew gaping after him in slight mortification, with everyone's amused stares on him.
Great, he had finally managed to embarrass Andrew, and it had only cost him his dignity.
Good enough for him.