Chapter Text
Over a century ago, there was a girl born to a middle class merchant family. She was the youngest of three, with a mother and father like most typical families. What wasn’t typical was her father was a drunk, her mother was unavailable to her daughter’s needs, and her two older brothers always treated her like a baby. In fact, everyone did in that stupid village.
To them, she was Regina Corneas, the baby girl they expected to assume the traditional role of a housewife. She was to grow into a beautiful woman, be married off, and take care of the home. Never mind that she wanted so much more than that.
She was just a girl, a dumb kid. Why would she waste her time reading and learning how to be a merchant, like her father? Wives didn’t need mathematics, they just needed to keep a clean home and look pretty while doing it.
Her life was made if she just kept her mouth shut. Everything would go according to plan if she did as she was told. That was to be her life.
Funny that she was the one alive and surrounded by all that she could ever want, while the rest of them were dead.
She killed them all with her own hands after the Witch of Vainglory, Pandora, gifted her a tiny black box containing an ultimate power.
Good riddance. No one would limit her again, she was master of her own fate. They could not control the goddess that she knew she was. The only person who could order her around was that same damn Witch, and even then the girl hated it.
Which is why she was on a dirt road in the countryside rather than at home.
The golden eyed woman with long white hair pulled back into a ponytail and bangs that hung in the fringes of her vision walked untouched by the world. Her long, white Roman-Greco style coat, pants, and shoes were perfectly free of any dirt or damage. Nothing could touch her unless she allowed it, and she never did. Not even the effects of time or the limitations of the flesh could affect the Goddess of Greed.
It had been a long wait, and utterly boring. Her orders were to intercept the army that had managed to slay that oversized white guppy, but she had more important things on her mind. Namely, finding the one person worthy of being her husband.
The irony that her ultimate goal was to get married, the very fate she had rejected as a mortal village girl, and was now the key to her continued power was not lost on her.
She was Regina Corneas, the most content and perfect woman in the world. That meat obsessed woman thought the title belonged to her, but she couldn’t compare to a goddess in flesh. Regina was rich, she was unstoppable, she was beautiful- and yet, unmarried.
That was her choice, of course- men were just unworthy pigs. Most of them valued women for their beauty or subservience as an extension to boost their own ego or standing. Regina, however, wouldn’t stand for the very life she had been condemned to that kind of secondhand life before gaining divinity. No, she was a living wonder who deserved only the best.
Her husband would be more than some ornament. He’d be handsome, no doubt, but she wanted someone truly devoted to her, someone who’d go above and beyond to treat her with the respect and reverence she deserved. She didn’t want an incompetent fool nor a coward, nor a collection of dolls. A self-righteous narcissist would try to control her, which was also unacceptable and suicidal on their part.
No, her best option was a connection, something real and fulfilling. This was preferable for multiple reasons. Namely, if he cared for her, then he would be less likely to betray her or seek her death. The best slaves were the kind that put the chains around their own necks, and that meant Regina needed someone useful and in love with her- easier said than done, despite her powers.
Barring all this aside, they also needed to be weaker than herself- that was she could keep him on a leash should he ever try to step out of line. After all, she was the goddess here. She refused to be second place in anything.
That was why the Sword Saint was out of the question…
She sighed and thought it would go unnoticed. It didn’t.
“Just what are you daydreaming about, we wonder~ tsu?” Lye asked as he sniffed the air like a beast.
Regina groaned as her thoughts were interrupted. What an annoying creature.
“My thoughts are far too refined for an animal to understand.” She replied. The goddess kept her chin high and eyes forward to ignore the little brute.
Lye growled deep in his throat before it bubbled out of his fanged mouth as a laugh. “We assume whatever it is won’t interfere with our orders~ tsu. This meal promises to be a gluttenous banquet, after all~ tsu!”
Regina didn’t respond, nor share in Lye’s excitement that not even her insults could dampen. She was interested to see who managed this feat. Perhaps they would be worthy of her, but she doubted it. No one ever was. She had plenty of servants, each a beautiful woman stripped of their name and rights to better serve their goddess, to house her heart until someone worthy appeared to serve as her primary vanguard.
It was the only real reason she willingly complied with the order to come here, even if she felt that it would be a waste of time.
As Regina’s patience thinned, she saw it.
A caravan of dragon pulled wagons heading directly for them.
She waited with a self-important smile on her face, her golden eyes gleaming. Once these plebians realized she was here, they would stop and she could assess their worth. After all, these men and women were soldiers were they not? It wasn’t in their nature to- wait.
“Get outta the way!” The carriage driver shouted from the distance.
A vein pulsed in Regina’s forehead.
Did… Did he just try to order her to stand aside?
“How boorish of you to order me, a pedestrian minding her own business, to stand aside! This road-!”
“Move it!” The driver shouted as the carriage sped closer, the man clearly growing concerned and waving his arm frantically as if she were too dull to understand what was happening.
Regina scowled and shouted, “You are unworthy of speaking to me in that manner! You have no right to give orders to a goddess!”
The driver gaped as if speechless. He closed his eyes and looked away for what he knew would be a bloody outcome. When the speeding wagon collided with her unmoving body…
It exploded in a violent display of divine authority.
Wood, gore, dirt, and metal flew in all directions as if it had slammed straight into bedrock. The screams of the wounded and the shrieking of twisting metal accompanied the snapping of wood and bone. A cloud of dust surrounded Regina, but not a single speck of filth marred her glorious visage. It was as if the world itself knew that to touch her, even minutely, were an inexcusable sin.
All the while, Regina seethed beneath a grim smile. The carriages behind that one scrambled to come to a stop, but it was in vain as she began to educate them on the error of their ways. She raised her hand regally, an undeniable force greater than nature itself.
“It is pathetic how you ants thought you could challenge a goddess. Of course, you fools tried and failed, but that meant violating my rights to stand where I please! Here I am, wishing to engage in peaceful dialogue and yet you people try to run me down so rudely! You disgraceful soldiers, how dare you believe your carriages have more rights than my divine self, a perfect being playing civilian, when the very laws of the land state that roads are free for any traveler!-”
The second carriage slammed into her and was reduced to splinters and meat bits.
”-But I am a forgiving woman, utterly above such barbaric actions you have shown. But even so, such a blatant disregard for my being is a disgusting display of perceived superiority over my own life. To say that you men would place such a value over another person is abhorrent, a disgrace to the position in which you occupy.”
The dust was clearing, and while other carriages had stopped, there was one still coming. A green-haired woman in armor seemed to be encouraging the driver to ram her. Ignorant insects!
The carriage sped up with the woman disappearing back inside as Regina continued. The vein in her head pulsed. They were ignoring her! Regina turned her hand over and curled her middle finger to rest underneath her thumb.
“Do you not see you are violating my rights?! Me, a literal goddess, the most content and perfect woman in the world?! How dare you not even offer an apology! How dare-!”
“Jump now!” A woman shouted from the carriage moments before impact.
“DON’T YOU INTERRUPT ME, YOU GREEN-HAIRED BITCH!!!”
As those in the carriage obeyed the armored woman, Regina flicked her restrained finger and obliterated everything in front of her.
The flying debris became missiles that damaged and maimed the caravan and its occupants. More dust plumed outward from the wanton destruction created by the air molecules affected by Regina’s greed. Through that plume of dust soared a green slash of mana infused wind, slicing through any resistance to end the life of the enemy before it. Of course, the attack didn't hit Regina.
It burst apart the moment it connected with her outstretched finger without even displacing a single white hair on her head.
The dust cleared thanks to the wind blade, revealing that green-haired woman in armor, several soldiers who hadn’t all escaped the blast, and-
Regina blinked. What was a cute little blue-haired maid doing with a bunch of soldiers? This made no sense. Her uniform was dirty and rumpled in places, though surely not from just that last attack. She was certainly beautiful, and wielding a strange black and pink morningstar, but still-
Greed’s eyes widened and her blood boiled possessively.
These depraved soldiers! Did they-?
“Who are you?” The emerald warrior demanded as she raised her blade once more.
Regina tore her eyes from the adorable blue maid and focused on the other woman.
“You would ask me that now after you so callously try to run me down? Did no one teach you etiquette? Alas, you poor, uneducated cretin, allow me to rectify this glaring oversight! You see, it is the right of people to identify themselves upon first meeting someone, as well as ask for the name of said person. By attacking my divine visage, you have not only violated my rights to a polite and civil exchange, but you have forfeited your own rights to the same. Tell me, are you a brutish woman without any common decency? It would appear so, for- ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME?!”
Regina swatted another green slash aside, her molten eyes blazing. That bitch was just trying to distract her! When that cute blue girl launched ice magic at her, Regina sighed and snapped her fingers. The affected air smashed the ice into dust.
She then slashed the air in front of her with a flick of her wrist, which sent her own air blade at the emerald warrior and severed her sword arm.
“No!” The blue maid shouted and immediately ran to attend to the Duchess. Her hands lit up with blue-green healing magic, but there was little she could do.
The Sin Archbishop smirked. So cute and fierce, but so stupid. Poor ignorant girl.
“Ah, what a wonderful feast, a bloody banquet, a delicious display of gluttony~ tsu!”
Both Regina and the blue maid’s attention were drawn to the little beast that walked among the dead and wounded, all slain while Crusch and the blue one focused on Regina. He stalked forward, his tattered cloak, greasy hair, and stained wrist blades all covered with crimson. The teenage killer, hunched over and grinning like a rabid animal, held his arms out wide as he cackled.
“More! We want more~ tsu! Yes, yes, we love the fear in your eyes~ tsu! It’s the perfect seasoning for such a rare delicacy, an oni no less~ tsu! Fierce, yet so scared! Oh, how you must wish that boy was with you~ tsu!”
Regina watched the emotions play across the blue maid’s face. It changed from defiance, to horror, then to pure unadultered rage. Whoever this boy was, he seemed to mean a lot to the maid.
She must love him. How pathetic.
When the maid stood up, she brandished her weapon and glared at Lye with killing intent. “Just who are you?! Why have you done this?!”
“Oh, certainly~ tsu!” Lye chuckled. “Please, allow us to introduce ourselves~ tsu! We are known as the Sin Archbishop of the Witch’s Cult representing Gluttony, Lye Batenkaitos~ tsu!”
Not to be ignored, Regina placed a hand on her chest and declared, “I am the Sin Archbishop of the Witch’s Cult representing Greed, Regina Corneas.”
When the blue maid glared at them both and seemed to struggle with some internal conflict, Regina noticed the girl look over her shoulder towards the now unconscious Crusch.
Ah, so it was concern that kept her rooted to the spot. Noble. Foolish, but noble. Regina admired that, among other things, about this maid. If she was an oni, then she truly was a delicacy…
Regina’s smile widened, her interest piqued.
“You should have run while you could~ tsu. Before you die, perhaps you’d like to say a few words for us to pass along to that nasty eyed boy~ tsu?” Lye teased with a perverse smile, which only grew upon the girl’s reaction. “Oh ho, struck a nerve did we~ tsu?”
“I have nothing to say to you, monster!” The blue maid snapped and held her ground. “I will not die here, my hero will be here any moment to save me and defeat you!”
Wait, ‘hero’? Regina narrowed her eyes. Now she was really interested in this girl.
“A maid who fancies herself a princess~ tsu? Please, why would someone like that come to save you~ tsu? Who are you~ tsu?” Lye prodded with a sly, perverse grin.
Oh, here he goes, Regina thought.
“My name is Rem, and Rem’s hero is a great man who brought down the White Whale! He will stop you and save us! I know he will because that is just the kind of person he is!” Rem declared faithfully as her forehead sparked with electricity where a horn sprouted from her flesh. “Rem will hold you here and protect Lady Crusch until her hero comes for her!”
Regina brought a manicured thumbnail to her bottom lip and studied Rem’s words. This girl was pretty adamant this ‘hero’ of hers was going to arrive at any moment like out of a children’s fairytale. If he actually was the one that brought down that huge oversized floating ball of blubber, then surely he was a hero. Why was this hero not here with the maid, then? To have this much faith in him, surely she was just smitten…
Did that mean he was back by the dead whale? He probably wasn’t dead then.
This bore some investigation…
“Girl, this hero of yours… What is his name?” Regina asked, drawing the maid’s attention away from Lye.
Rem snarled and raised her weapon. “A filthy Cultist doesn’t deserve to say his name-!”
“Who cares~ tsu? He won’t save you~ tsu!” Lye cackled and vanished in a blur of speed.
Regina curled her lip and bit down on her nail.
Idiots…
Lye and Rem faced off, the two combatants moving at such speeds that the untrained eye could scarcely keep up. It was getting annoying to watch as Rem’s chains parried Lye’s daggers, only for the feral teen to strike at any perceived opening. The clinking of metal and metal was loud and only matched by Rem’s cries of rage as she struck again and again without landing a single blow.
At this point, Regina would have aided her fellow Archbishop had she not decided to pull her Gospel out of her long white coat and opened it. She scanned the pages for a moment before slamming it shut with a satisfied grin. That was all she needed to know.
The battle raged on as the two fighters went all out, but Lye was simply playing with his food rather than taking it seriously. Sensing this, Rem tried to get the upper hand, but was caught off guard when he laid a hand on her head and ran his tongue over his palm.
The maid assumed this was just some disgusting taunt and struck again.
Raising her hand towards the duel before her, Regina casually took aim and flicked.
The ground between the maid and the Cultist exploded, sending the oni girl sprawling in the grass nearby. She cried out in pain from the cowardly attack, but was unable to get back on her feet quickly enough. The Sin Archbishop of Gluttony had launched himself at her, frothing at the mouth with maniacal glee and overwhelming hunger. Just as he landed on top of Rem’s prone form and held her down, the maid’s screams piercing the air, he was promptly yanked off and cast away like garbage.
Lye twisted his body midflight and landed on his feet like a trained acrobat. The teen scowled with pure rage at his meal being interrupted. Baring his teeth, he snapped, “What is the meaning of this~ tsu?”
Regina Corneas stood proudly beside the maid, her chin raised to stare down at the blue girl with intrigue. “The green-haired woman mentioned a hero. Answer me, what do you know?”
The maid glared up at Regina and tried pulling her tired, wounded body upright. She didn’t register the discrepancy of Regina’s words at first. When she managed to get up, Regina put her foot between the maid’s breasts and pushed her back down into the grass. What should have been a soft bed was flattened beneath the beautiful girl, who struggled to free herself to no avail.
That cursed foot ground her into the dirt, causing pain and restraining the maid but not killing her.
Ending her life wasn’t the goal. No, that wouldn’t do if this girl would answer her questions. A darkly amused smile spread across Regina’s features. Greed had other plans.
“Give us back our meal~ tsu!” Lye shouted indignantly, stalking closer like a carrion bird to a corpse as he pulled at his hair in wide eyed frustration. “We prepared it perfectly, the flavors cultivated to that worthy of a gourmet~ tsu! You’ll ruin it~ tsu!”
Regina ignored him. The maid was clawing at her legs like an animal in a snare, growling and crying because she refused to give up. Such a volatile reaction meant that this girl was not ready to die, despite the hopeless situation.
Was it because of this hero?
This could all be a waste of her precious time, but her Gospel did tell her what to do with this nameless maid.
“Answer me. I won’t ask again.” Regina scowled, perturbed by the maid’s rudeness. “If you don’t, I’ll feed you to the rabid dog over there.”
“Give it back~ tsu!” Gluttony screamed and brandished his twin blades.
Regina turned barely restrained divine fury upon Lye with a scathing glare. “You would dare violate my right to a civil discussion with another person?!”
Lye tensed up, then scoffed in resignation. He knew he wouldn’t be able to beat Regina Corneas in a fight. Instead, he began pacing back and forth like a hungry lion in a cage while Regina finished up whatever nonsense she was up to.
The living goddess turned her attention back to the oni. The maid’s horn was bright with mana, but it changed nothing. She was utterly within Regina’s mercy. The hand of Greed rose into the air and pointed towards the fallen soldiers.
“What will it be, maid? I have no qualms about killing those men, or you. Give me a name… or their blood is on your hands.”
The maid furiously glared up at Regina. She was caught, and she knew it. If she died here, if she failed to keep them occupied before her hero came to her rescue, then she knew he’d blame himself. Her duty was to live and protect Lady Crusch. To that end, she had no choice…
If they were to die here, she would at least keep her beloved safe.
“I’d sooner die than hear his name on your filthy tongue.”
Regina’s heel dug into the maid’s sternum, causing the girl to cry out in agony. “Oh, is that so? What a nuisance you are. Did it not occur to you that I wish to simply meet this ‘hero’, to engage in dialogue to ascertain his worth? Does this rudeness, this flagrant disrespect, originate from your demonic nature? You have no right to deny me a meeting with this ‘hero’. Either you all die and I find him, or you live and I find him. Do you understand now? Can your adorable little head wrap around the words I am speaking? Surely you must. It’s such a basic question that even children can understand it.”
Lye groaned and stomped his feet in a tantrum. “AAAH! JUST LET US FEAST ALREADY!”
“No one will get here in time, maid.” Regina continued and curled her index finger again to ready another fatal blast of concussive force. “Name the hero, or you will never see him again. Instead, you will watch everything he worked so hard to achieve get blown away. Tell me, would it break his heart if you died? Would you put him through such agony willingly? I’m offering you a way out, a chance to see him again. You need only comply.”
The maid squeezed her eyes shut and winced as the pressure increased, her teeth gritted against the pain.
This girl… How dare she not answer me!
Setting her jaw, Regina reminded herself of what her Gospel revealed- the hero would be pleased if the maid lived. While she didn’t necessarily need the oni, everything would probably progress much smoother if she survived. As much as she wanted to end this impudent girl, Regina was only so patient as to get what she wanted as quickly as possible. Putting up with her insolence this long was all in the name of reaching her goal.
I may not be able to kill her, but…
The blazing rage in Regina’s golden eyes suddenly cooled when an idea came to her. A sadistic smile split her beautiful features as she turned her head towards the seething Archbishop of Gluttony as he practically foamed at the mouth. With a voice as sweet as a serpent’s kiss, Regina proposed her idea.
“Maid, if you answer me, not only will I spare these soldiers… but I’ll even take you under my protection.”
Gluttony’s eyes lit up with feral hunger as he gnashed his teeth.
“WHAT?!” Lye screamed and stepped forward. “You-You-You thief~ tsu! This is our meal ~ tsu! Unacceptable, impossible, an insult to all gourmets~ tsu! You dare to have us squander half of a perfectly prepared meal~ tsu? The nerve, the gall, the utter insanity! We shall-!”
Suddenly a gust of wind sliced into the skin and hair of Lye’s left side. A shallow cut bled down his arm, fragments of hair disintegrating in the gale behind him. The ground once again exploded in a series of booms as everything behind the teen was thrown in every direction and was now raining down on him.
The teen sociopath froze to the spot, fully aware of how close to oblivion he came.
The maid didn’t move, and instead stared up at Regina in confusion.
The goddess, who had simply displaced the loose dirt beneath her foot when she shifted her stance, had eradicated the landscape behind the beastly boy. Her arm still raised, she turned her weaponized fingers towards Gluttony with the coldest look the boy had ever seen on Regina’s face. It wasn’t hot rage, cold hatred, or anything in between.
That look was absolute, fatal certainty.
“You would dare question my sanity.”
Lye felt a bead of sweat roll down his brow as Regina raised her chin to haughtily look down on the diminutive Archbishop.
“Eat the rest of them or nothing at all. This one is mine. Leave, before I lose my patience.”
“No! You monster!” The maid shrieked, her teeth bared as she clawed at Regina’s leg until her fingernails bled.
Feeling trapped, but still a slave to his hunger, Lye growled and turned away.
“Tch! The flavor is sullied~ tsu!” Lye complained as he made his way over towards the fallen soldiers around the remains of the caravan. He stepped over to one, a large armored man, and touched his head with his hand before pulling it back and licking his palm as he had against the maid.
The maid noticed the similarities and began to panic. “What did you do?! What was that just now?! Answer me, you filth!”
Regina glanced down at the maid and arched an eyebrow. “You know of the hero the armored woman mentioned, correct?”
The maid was confused. “W-What? She didn’t-!”
“Ah, so it was actually you then?” Regina smirked, fully aware of Gluttony’s effects. “You belong to me now, so you’re going to give me his name and lead me to him.”
She snarled, “You don’t own me! Why would I ever answer you?”
“Do you want to save him or not?”
The girl froze, her eyes widened. “W-What?”
“My Gospel told me that he is in grave danger. If we are to save him, you have to lead me to him. When we do, I would prefer to know his name so as to properly address him upon our meeting.” Regina sighed and shook her head, the half-truth easily taking shape on her tongue. “Don’t be slow, maid. My patience is thin enough without you wearing down further.”
“W-Why would you want to save him? He is going to defeat you Cultists, just like he did the White Whale! Why would you-?” The maid asked, paranoid for her hero’s safety.
“I shall explain after we save him, for time is of the essence. Now then…”
The last thing the blue beauty ever expected to happen was for her to be lifted up off the ground and thrown over the shoulder of a Sin Archbishop of the Witch’s Cult like a sack of tatoes. Just as the strange white woman took off at inhuman speeds back towards the corpse of the Whale, the maid had just enough time to have an existential crisis and scream bloody murder while thrashing helplessly.
“Why won’t you just go to hell already?!”
His arms pumped vigorously as he sprinted through the forest. The boy’s clothes and flesh were damp and slick with sweat. His breath came in audible wheezes from the air he forced in and out of his lungs. Dirt and leaves rustled beneath his sneakers, the sound almost completely obscured by the wind rushing past his ears.
Subaru Natsuki cursed everything that led him to this point. He cursed Return by Death, he cursed the Witch, he cursed all the senseless death he’d been put through, and he cursed himself, but what did he curse most of all? That question was easy to answer.
It was the psychotic colossal asshole sprinting after him like a nightmarish acid trip.
“LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!” Petelguese, or what was left of him, screamed as he scuttled after Subaru for the third time.
Subaru leaps over a fallen log and continues his dead sprint.
Five seconds later, Petelguese barrels through the log, using his mangled face like a battering ram and splintering it into a thousand pieces.
Fucking bastard! Why won’t he just stay dead?! How many times do I have to kill him?!
Subaru’s muscles screamed and protested their mistreatment, but what choice did he have? It was either that or die horribly. Again.
The piecemeal zombie crawler rip off was closing the distance. It wouldn’t take long before he’d be able to reach Subaru. The boy knew this all too well, he could feel the undead meat puppet at his back and his Unseen Hands shaking the earth beneath his feet.
Primal panic blocked out reason and pushed his body to the limit. Subaru refused to die to Petelgeuse again. He had to figure something out, had to see the solution that only he could see from several attempts in the crucible.
Come on, think! Think, think, think!
He didn’t have Patrasche. Otto was dead in this loop.
Keep running! Think, what else?!
Emilia and Ram were nowhere close, and neither were Crusch and Rem, thank God. He couldn’t stomach losing her again.
No, he couldn’t rely on Emilia again, either. Never again. Not after what happened in the last loop.
Julius and Felix were-
“GAH!”
Something collided with bone shattering force into Subaru’s left side. The world spun violently as he soared through the air like a ragdoll. His body crashed through tree branches and foliage until he hit the rocky ground. Subaru skipped and rolled across the surface, the rocks biting into his body and ruining his tracksuit. The ground gave way to mud and shallow water as his body came to rest on his back in the middle of a creek bed.
The teen couldn't breathe. The blow knocked the wind out of him and must have broken a few ribs. Grimacing past the pain, Subaru lifted his wet, mud covered hair and tried to roll on to his least painful side. The effort was enough to make him dizzy and cough up blood into the silty waters. His limbs didn’t want to respond to his commands, but he had enough wits to know he couldn’t stay down.
Petelguese was coming. He didn’t have time to stop. He had to move, damn it!
“LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!” The madman cried as he bulldozed through the forest to reach his incapacitated prey.
Subaru’s scary eyes peeled to the side to stare directly as the monster that was coming to claim his life yet again.
What the hell was it going to take to get past this damn loop?! Subaru gritted his teeth and glared defiantly at the approaching Sin Archbishop of Sloth. He was sick of this bastard, so fucking sick of losing to a freak like him! It was only a matter of time before the end found Subaru.
Where had it gone wrong?
After Petelguese managed to possess him, Subaru had taken precautions. He could remember the struggle he had as he fought against the mad spirit for control long enough to beg Felix and Julius to kill him. Subaru knew he left them with little choice, that their guilty expressions and hesitation would forever be etched into his mind, but it had been necessary. He couldn’t allow Petelgeuse to possess him.
That death had allowed him to prepare a counter to it, one that had worked. After a lengthy battle with Julius’ aid, Subaru managed to defeat Petelgeuse at the base of a rocky cliff. Later, just when he thought victory was assured, he learned of the explosive fire crystals in the carriage that was taking Emilia and the people of Arlam to safety. Naturally, Subaru convinced Otto to rush him to Emilia’s aid.
That was the first time Petelguese’s mangled body came after him. Subaru remembered cheekily scribbling in Sloth’s Gospel, using Otto’s oil and his Rental Goa to blow Petelguese to hell, then letting the monstrosity fall to his death. By all accounts, Subaru thought the nightmare was almost over. Taking his trusty girl Patrasche, Subaru then raced to save Emilia.
He reached the carriage just fine and managed to climb aboard. Like an arriving hero, he swooped in and pried the last threat to his beloved EMT’s safety out of the secret compartment. Subaru managed to leap from the carriage and back on to Patrasche. Emilia had been deathly afraid for his safety and asked why he was going so far for her. On top of the world, Subaru finally spoke the words that had been etched into his heart from the first time he laid eyes on her.
“It’s because I lov-”
Then the crystals blew him, Emilia, Patrache, and the carriage straight to hell.
He still had no idea what went wrong. Did the crystals just become too unstable? Did he jostle them when he leapt on to Patrasche? Did someone just have it out for him? While he was sure about that last one, Subaru could only recall his frustration when he woke up during the strategy meeting again.
This time, he promised, he would get it right.
He, in fact, did not get it right. It took another five tries to get this far.
Rather than send Emilia away on the doomed carriage, he convinced her to hang back with him. Subaru, Julius, and Emilia then hunted down Petelguese and his Fingers. They led him into a trap where Subaru was able to use those fire crystals and level the entire area. Emilia had been distraught at such wanton destruction, especially when it was done by Subaru’s hand. He had been so caught up in trying to kill Petelguese that he nearly didn’t get Emilia out of range in time.
The way she looked at him had bothered him more than a little, but the plan had worked. Nothing had been left standing, the blast effectively killing Petelguese for good without a trace. Subaru once again achieved his victory, and now he could finally get to tell Emilia how he felt. Surely after all that they went through, she’d be able to accept his feelings!
At least, that’s what he thought.
Emilia and he were standing in Arlam with the rest of the alliance forces. He had just gotten the gall, high on victory over impossible odds, to finally confess to Emilia. When she had reacted with cautious uncertainty, Subaru was at a loss. He didn’t expect Emilia to reciprocate his feelings, but that look on her face…
It looked an awful lot like fear.
Of course, lost in the throes of heartbreak, no one had been prepared for Petelgeuse to once again crash through their lives.
The attack was sudden, and no one had been expecting it. The big creature made a beeline for Subaru and Emilia. Unable to fight properly back in a village of tired soldiers without Puck, he killed Emilia in a murderous rage. Subaru thought that he was next.
Puck had other plans.
The little grey cat emerged and took up his large bestial form. He made quick work of Petelguese, the soldiers, and would have killed Subaru outright if he hadn’t wanted to speak to him before the end. Subaru was left on his hands and knees before Puck, who stood over Emilia’s mangled body like a lion.
“You’re disgusting, Subaru Natsuki.” The Beast of the End snarled as the world around them was plunged into a never ending winter. Snow and frost clung to his fur, his eyes flashing with malice. “You dare to say you love my daughter, but you can’t even protect her?”
“I tried!” Subaru screamed as his tears froze to his face. “Everything I did was meant to protect her!”
“That little stunt with the fire crystals almost cost her life, yet you have the nerve to say you did it to protect her? How was having her fight your battles supposed to protect her, Subaru?” Puck's lips curled back to reveal several large fangs.
“You don’t get to lecture me, Puck!” Subaru shouted, indignant and frustrated more than the spirit could understand.
He was fed up, tired, and spent. The last thing he wanted was for any of this to happen. For anyone to think he didn’t try, wasn’t trying, just added insult to injury. No one had any idea how much effort he was putting forth for everyone’s sake!
No one had any right to lecture or look down on him!
“That’s where you’re wrong, Subaru!” Puck growled menacingly. “I’m the only one with that right! It’s because of your weakness and your pathetic need to be close to Lia, to have her validate everything you do like you’re some helpless baby, that she was even here!”
“That’s not true!”
“Isn’t it? I seem to recall you fawning over her every chance you had back at the mansion. You thought the fact that she saved you meant you need to be her protector, right? Let me ask you, Subaru, what exactly have you done for my daughter since she took pity on you, hmm?”
Puck leaned closer to the boy covered in snow. The Great Spirit exhaled and Subaru couldn’t suppress the violent shiver that wracked his body. Both of them locked eyes in a battle of wills.
“I didn’t-!”
“You have been nothing but a nuisance. Distracting Lia, playing on her kind heart, and causing her nothing but undue stress. At the Capital, you embarrassed yourself and her before everyone she had to impress. Now, you show back up after she told you to stay away to play the hero, but have her and others fight for you? What kind of hero are you?”
Subaru winced, still indignant but the cold was sapping his strength.
“Lia is dead because you are pathetic. This disgusting, childish infatuation cost my daughter everything, Subaru! Everything! Yet I hear no apology, only your worthless excuses!” Puck rose up to his full height to become a shadow against the sky with glowing gold eyes and a heart as cold as ice.
“I’m going to make you suffer, Subaru! I’m going to make you wish you had never crossed paths with my daughter before the end!”
Subaru couldn’t do anything but hang his head as the cold numbed his entire body.
“You’re nothing, Subaru! You always were! A pitiful nobody my sweet Lia let follow her home like a stray dog! Now she’s gone because of you, of your failure, and your shortcomings! Just something nasty cowering behind Lia’s shadow!”
That hit too close to home, Subaru thought. It reminded him of how he felt towards his parents. Was this what Puck thought of him? Truly?
Was this what he really was to Emilia?
No… I… She would never…
“How does it feel knowing that you’ll die a meaningless death, all because you thought you had to be close to an innocent girl?” Puck raised a huge paw with his claws extended. “I’ll make sure you suffer for what you put Lia through, for cutting her life short because you had to be some great hero.”
Subaru closed his eyes tightly, unwilling to hear the words that tore through his heart.
“Do you hear me, Subaru Natsuki?!” Puck screeched into the blizzard winds.
The boy said nothing, couldn’t even, past the chattering of his teeth. He couldn’t feel anything anymore, let alone move. All he could do was listen.
Listen and wait for the end.
Puck’s clawed hand curled around Subaru’s prone form and formed a cage.
“Hear my words, Subaru!” The Great Spirit’s eyes flashed.
It closed around his body.
“You were the worst thing to happen to Lia! You are nothing, do you hear me?! You! Are! Nothing!”
Then the cold consumed him until there was nothing left but Puck’s words being carried on the wind.
Subaru watched as the hulking mass of shadows and body parts rushed towards him. To get this far, he sent Emilia away as originally intended and followed the same path as a previous loop, one where he almost succeeded before blowing himself up. The only difference was he removed the crystals before Emilia left and used them on Petelguese, a combination of loops in a way.
Unfortunately, he miscalculated. When Otto and he were making their getaway, Petelguese managed to catch up to them and kill Otto. Subaru was forced to run as the corpse didn’t go off the cliff, but shambled after him to this creek.
Now, he was stuck all over again.
Subaru glared defiantly as Petelguese came closer. This monster was never going to just die, never going to end. The isekai'ed teen felt his hope shriveling up with each passing second. While this had been the longest he’d managed to survive, minus the time he chased down Emilia’s carriage, no loop had been ideal. Nothing he did would end Petelguese quickly.
He was too pathetic to stop something like this creature, an undead natural disaster. Climbing to his feet, the teen gritted his teeth and cradled his broken ribs with his uninjured arm. If he was going to die, he was going to do it facing down this damn thing.
“LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!” Petelguese raved as his Unseen Hands plunged into the water to close the distance.
“Come and get me, you bastard!” Subaru shouted even as his heart felt crushed in his chest.
He had no hope. Nothing could help him escape these hellish loops, nor could he ever truly win with the help of his allies. His obsession with Emilia had led him here, to this spot, and now he could see it for what it was: pathetic, just like the rest of him. Puck had been right.
I’m a pitiful nobody, alright.
Petelguese’s Unseen Hands reached out like a dozen spears ready to pulverize his flesh.
Subaru refused to close his eyes.
Even so, I refuse to let you win!
Everything went white.
Wait… white-?
The world exploded like those fire crystals and deafened the teen even as something soft and heavy collided with his torso. His cry of pain was lost to the sound of the explosion as he fell on his ass with something pressed into his chest. When he finally had enough wherewithal to understand that he was holding, his heart nearly burst from his chest in fear.
“R-Rem?!” He shouted.
It was indeed Rem, but she was unconscious. He hugged her close in terror and felt her heartbeat against his ribs. She was alive!
“How dare you blather on when I am trying to strike a conversation with someone! Have you no manners, you disgusting carcass?!” A woman’s voice snapped in front of Subaru.
His attention was immediately taken away from his blue-haired love and pulled towards someone else.
The white that blocked his vision before was the back of a woman who stood between him and Petelguese. Her entirely white outfit obscured everything in front of her. That is, until she turned around and faced him with a rather smug and self-important smile. Her skin was pale, her eyes were gold, and her hair was just as white as her pristine Roman-Greco style coat.
Subaru, however, had no idea who the hell this woman was. She wasn’t exactly beautiful, but not ugly either, just… plain? He blinked and struggled to comprehend what she was doing here until he remembered the undead steam roller that had been coming for him.
“Sh-Shit, where-?!” Subaru began, but was silenced when the mysterious woman put a slender finger to his lips to silence him.
“Be silent. That vile creature is gone, so you are safe.” She pulled her finger away and lifted her chin haughtily. “Tell me, are you the one known as a hero to this young maid?”
Subaru was taken aback. He grimaced and peered around the stranger’s shoulder, “Wait, how-?!”
A vein pulsed in the woman’s forehead.
“I have already dealt with him. Now, answer my question before I lose the last of my patience. Do you have any idea how much time I’ve wasted looking for this one’s hero?”
“H-Hero?” Subaru held Rem close and backed away from the woman. “What’s wrong with Rem? What did you do to her?”
The woman’s eyes widened. “You… know the maid’s name. How? That’s impossible.”
Subaru was confused. Of course he knew Rem! She was his-!
“I see. You must truly be special, then.” The woman said and smiled darkly. “Very well, then you shall-!”
“LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!!!” A familiar voice croaked as the creek bed burst apart behind the woman.
Subaru shouted in shock as Petelguese’s severed face rose up out of the water, supported only by a dozen Unseen Hands as they immediately set to tear apart the woman.
The teen boy reacted instinctively. Without even thinking, he jumped forward and put his own body between the woman and Petelguese. He turned to show the spirit his back as he cradled Rem against his chest and screamed for the woman to take Rem and run.
To his shock, she didn’t move at first. She raised her hand almost leisurely, completely unbothered, as she stared directly into his eyes. The mysterious woman reached her hand behind Subaru’s head and stood close enough that he should have been able to feel her breath on his face, but he felt nothing.
He couldn’t even smell if she were wearing any kind of perfume.
It was like she didn’t exist.
“You truly do have a hero’s heart, don’t you?” The woman said and then snapped her fingers.
Subaru was once again subject to the world exploding, but this time he had his back to it. He jumped out of skin when the wind tore at his clothes and the mist sprayed up his back. His ears rang from the concussive force of the attack, nearly forcing him to his knees. The entire time he managed to stay standing and held Rem close, the blue maid still out cold.
The white-haired woman just stood there with a satisfied grin and watched his every expression with amusement.
As the landscape settled down, Subaru slowly opened his eyes. His entire body was shaking like a leaf in a typhoon. When Rem whimpered against his neck, he realized just how tightly he was holding her and loosened his arms. Looking down, Rem was still out cold, but at least she was alive.
Subaru turned his head to peer over his shoulder and couldn’t believe what he was seeing.
The creek, the shore, the trees, everything behind him was gone. It was all ravaged and destroyed as if someone carpet bombed it. The Japanese teen didn’t hear anything other than the gurgling creek as it adjusted to its new, much deeper reservoir just past his heels as well as the last of the debris settling.
What the hell just happened…?
Subaru turned to face the mysterious woman again and immediately felt her hand settle on his cheek in a tender caress. The touch sent a shiver down his spine at the same time as the intent look in her golden eyes stole his breath away. Just who was this woman, and what did she do to Petelguese?
Was she an enemy?
“Who… are you?” Subaru asked carefully, searching her eyes for any indication she was dangerous.
Every alarm was going off in his head without him even trying.
The woman’s smile softened into something gentle, like what you’d give an ignorant child you took pity on after they did something stupid.
“My name is Regina Corneas, and I am a Sin Archbishop of the Witch’s Cult, representing Greed.”
Subaru felt all the color drain from his face.
Another Sin Archbishop?! Where the hell are they coming from? More importantly…
“What did you do to Rem?” Subaru asked as a bead of sweat rolled down his cheek.
Regina’s eyes shifted from his to Rem’s blue hair. The Cultist smirked and said with an air of indifference, “Ah, the blue maid? She passed out while we were searching for you. I fear I may have frightened her too much.”
Subaru audibly gulped. Rem seemed unharmed, but that didn’t mean she was okay. He feared for her greatly, but there was another cause for concern.
If Rem was here, then where was Crusch?
Subaru steeled himself. “What happened… to Crusch and the others? What did you do to them?”
Regina’s smile fell as she raised an eyebrow, still stroking his cheek. “Fear not, for I understand that your lack of manners comes from your concern for your companions. As an understanding and benevolent goddess, I assure you that they are more than likely alive. I did not end their lives even after they so rudely tried to run me down with three dragon carriages, which I would have been well within my rights to do. My companion, that gluttonous little heathen, however, may have indulged himself while I whisked the blue maid away to find you. I make no promises, surely you understand. This ‘Rem’ is the only one I ensured was spared.”
He narrowed his eyes. What the hell was this woman’s deal? Why the sudden rant? Why had she brought Rem here?
If she was a Witch Cultist, did that mean that she was going to kill them?
It seemed Regina saw his confusion and was able to read it. She breathed out an irritated sigh before pulling her hand away and crossing her arms in front of her chest. All the while, she stood there without a care, as if she knew exactly what he was thinking.
“I… I don’t understand. Why would you save Rem and me? This doesn’t make any sense!” Subaru shook his head. “What do you people want?!”
Regina’s expression bordered on irritable. Something about that set off Subaru’s danger sense.
“I demand you introduce yourself, hero! You ask these pointless questions yet refuse to return the proper respects before awaiting an answer. Surely, you have enough sense to realize such a blatantly improper course of conduct is a violation of my rights. Give me your name, hero, and I shall grace you with the answers you seek. I am a generous goddess, but not many are privy to the patience I am sparing for you. As the hero to this young maiden, you have earned such a blessing from myself. Will you speak before this blessing is wasted? I am awaiting your name.”
Subaru just stared at the woman, dumbfounded. What the hell was that? Did she just… want his name? All that verbal vomit just to get that out there?!
“My name is Subaru Natsuki…” He said, still unsure how to take this strange woman.
She smiled, quite pleased, and said, “Ah, see, was that so hard? It’s apparent you will need to be properly educated once we are married. I cannot allow my husband, heroic or not, to act in such a disrespectful manner to his divine wife.”
Subaru.exe has stopped responding.
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Complete- WHAT THE FUCK DID SHE JUST SAY?!
“Husband?! Married?!” Subaru shouted as his face lit up crimson. “Where the hell did that even come from?!”
Regina scowled and crossed her arms. “Lower your voice in my presence, my dear, it's rude to shout in a lady’s ear.”
“Dear? I’m not your dear- I don’t even know you!” Subaru sputtered, though he did indeed quiet down. “What is going on here?!”
The Goddess of Greed dramatically pressed her fingers to her forehead as if pitying the poor simpleton before her. “Subaru Natsuki, you and I are now engaged. Should I find you worthy, we shall be married once you conclude your business here. Tell me, are you quite finished? There is much to prepare.”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on!” Subaru said and readjusted Rem in his arms. Even as soft as she was, he was exhausted. “I can’t get married!”
Regina’s eyes narrowed dangerously as she tightly cupped his chin in her right hand, her grip almost past firm into painful. “Oh, why is that, my dear? Please. Enlighten me.”
Subaru gulped. He was in danger.
Why do I attract the crazy?
“I… I just, I mean, I don’t even know you. I don’t love you. Not to mention, you’re a Witch Cultist! A Sin Archbishop even!” He shrunk back a step out of her grip. “The Cult is my enemy, the enemy of the world. Why would I agree to this?”
Regina stared at him for a few moments before she gestured to Rem. “The maid, she belongs to me now. You and she shall be under my protection, naturally. If what she told me while I searched for you was true, then you are worthy of me. If you are not, then the maid is still mine.”
His stomach twisted into knots. She’s taking Rem hostage?!
This was bad. He needed a plan. Even though he had a feeling he knew the answer, he decided to ask anyway to stall while he racked his brain for a strategy to get out of this with Rem.
“What… did Rem say about me?”
“You are her hero, and the mastermind behind the death of the White Whale.” Regina explained. “That alone is no small feat. The maid was adamant that you were worthy of your title.”
Subaru looked down at the blue oni in his arms. While they had started off on the wrong foot, it was because of Rem that he found the resolve to move forward and bring everyone together. If it wasn’t for her, he would have chosen cowardice and fled from these impossible situations.
She truly didn’t give herself enough credit.
He was aware he could have fled anyway, perhaps even forced Rem to flee with him like he wanted, but ultimately the choice had been his. Subaru couldn’t blame Rem for the pain he’d suffered at Petelguese’s hands. Her words had inspired him when he had been at his lowest.
When Subaru thought he lost her during the Whale Subjugation, he had come to realize how much she truly meant to him. Rem confessed her feelings to him in the Capital, a sentiment he didn’t feel he could properly return at the time because of how he felt for Emilia. Now, however, he knew Puck had been right about him.
He was pathetic, just a boy obsessed with a pretty girl who took pity on him. Subaru wasn’t a hero. He was nothing special. There was nothing he could do alone, and even then, he couldn’t seem to ever do it right- no matter how many times he died for it.
Head lowered in self-depreciation, Subaru replied. “I’m not worthy of being Rem’s hero, but… I want to be. She believed in me when no one else did. If anything… I guess you could say she’s my hero.”
He expected Regina to mock him, perhaps even kill them, but what he hadn’t expected was for her to hum thoughtfully and turn her head away from him. Her body tensed, as if preparing for something. That made him uneasy.
“I see… How humble, but does this mean she was wrong and my time has indeed been wasted? Did you not lead that force to victory?”
Subaru frowned. “I mean, I helped. Everyone worked together.”
“Then why exactly is this maid so enraptured by you? Explain this.”
“I…” Subaru’s eyes scanned Rem’s beautiful face and searched for the right words. “I just… I was cursed by mabeasts. She risked her life for me, and I couldn’t just let her die. I promised to save everyone.”
“You saved her because she was going to die due to your incompetence?”
“What? No, I- I mean, I’m incompetent, but I didn’t cause the mabeast attack nor did I ask her to risk her life for me! We were trying to save the village kids who were cursed and taken by the Wolgram pack. They attacked, and when I pushed Rem out of the way, they cursed me and I-!”
“I see now.” Regina said and the tension noticeably left her shoulders. “The series of events is clear to me, yet you would still deny you are a hero? Tell me, what was your role in the defeat of the Whale?”
“I… led the allied forces to where it would be and explained when it would arrive. I got Crusch to agree to an alliance between Emilia and Anastasia’s Camps. Between the three of them, we were able to kill the thing.”
Regina chuckled and shook her head, confusing Subaru. She lifted her chin and looked down her nose at him with an arrogant smile. While that would normally piss him off, somehow he felt that it wasn’t meant to be condescending towards him, but rather as a show of pride on his behalf.
“The maid described you as humble, brave, determined, and strong of heart. If what you both have told me is true, then not only do you possess those qualities, but also charisma and intelligence. Truly impressive, indeed. With a little refinement, you will truly be worthy of being my husband.”
Subaru blanched. “Wait, I still don’t-!”
“As I said, you both belong to me now.” Regina interrupted haughtily. “You shall be under my protection so long as you remain mine. The maid, this Rem as you say, shall be my first gift to you. Feel grateful for my boundless generosity!”
The Japanese teenager bristled. So this woman was going to keep Rem, take her hostage, unless he went along with her crazy ideas?! While he appreciated being saved by this mysterious woman, the idea that she would happily take Rem, his precious Rem, away from him upset him greatly.
“Rem and I are not your property!” Subaru snapped. “We will never join the Cult, not after everything you people have put us through! I already told Petelguese there was no way in hell I would!”
Regina’s smile vanished. “He asked you to join the Cult?”
“Yeah, he thought I was Pride or whatever!”
“Fool,” Regina sighed. “If even that disgusting meat puppet was able to sense something special about you, then it must be plain for all to see. You have proven as much to me simply by naming this maid.”
Subaru’s eyebrows furrowed.
Wait, what?
“What do you mean? Of course she had a name! It’s Rem!” He said, not comprehending.
“No,” Regina said, “she no longer has a name.”
“What do you mean ‘she doesn’t have a name’? I just said her name is Rem!”
“That is precisely what I mean, my dear.” Regina explained. “You remember her name when no one else should. That little beast known as Gluttony is thorough. I prevented him from eating her memories, but he was able to eat her name.”
Subaru felt his knees go weak as he looked down at the unconscious girl in his arms. His trembling fingers squeezed her body, as if discerning whether she was real or not. There was a time when Otto had forgotten Rem when she had been consumed by the Whale, but she was right here. She was real flesh and blood.
Audibly gulping and leaning closer, Subaru spoke to the girl, “R-Rem? Hey, Rem, can you hear me? It’s Subaru… Please, I’m scared, say something!”
Rem said nothing, but she did stir in his arms. Her head lolled forward and nuzzled into his shoulder as she softly whimpered. While he would normally be a hormonally nervous mess at a time like this, the horror was taking away any of his baser urges.
“Rem… W-What happened to her? I don’t understand what you mean!” Subaru said, his breathing turning shallow and quick as his scary eyes bore into Regina in a fit of panic.
“Must I explain this again?” Regina asked herself, then looked back at Subaru. “Rem had her name eaten by Gluttony, but not her memories. This would normally mean that the world would forget her completely- she would, essentially, no longer exist to family, friends, everyone who ever knew her. Their memories of her would be devoured, but you? You, my dear Subaru Natsuki, somehow… remember Rem.”
Regina’s smile returned. She looked at him as if he were a curiosity, an anomaly. There was no kindness there, just… interest.
“That is remarkable, my dear. No one, not even myself, has been able to remember the names of those Gluttony has eaten. I cannot explain how you retain your memories of her, but that is… intriguing.”
Subaru fell to his knees into the significantly lowered creek bed, his legs sinking into the sand beneath the few inches of remaining water. His heart felt like it was about to explode. Rem was forgotten by the world? That was impossible! Surely Regina was wrong. There was no way everyone could forget Rem!
Ram would never forget her sister.
Roswaal would never forget his loyal head maid.
Emilia would never forget her.
Crusch and Wilhelm would never forget her.
Subaru pressed his forehead to Rem’s and began to cry. If this was true, he failed her again. He failed his Rem again!
“Why? She doesn’t deserve this… She’s… How could this have happened?!” Subaru sobbed as he held Rem tenderly in his arms. “Damn it, no… Not again…”
Regina tilted her head. Again?
She stared down at the hero and contemplated a few things. It was better for her that this man, this hero who she has chosen, actually cared for her rather than hated her. While a healthy amount of fear would be required regardless, Regina was aware that loyalty was far more precious when tempered with devotion. She didn’t necessarily need it, but it would simply make their relationship far more pleasant and worthwhile should he actually want to be her husband.
He would be less likely to betray her.
Greed looked down at the blue maid again and blinked. She had thought that sparing the maid would be enough. After all, she didn’t need to do any of this, but if securing a new, permanent and unassailable home for her heart meant she needed to grace her future husband with just a few more gifts…
Not that the maid was truly a gift for him alone, but still, perhaps…
She smirked to herself.
There was an idea.
“Perhaps you would like to get revenge?” Regina asked as she put a hand on her hip.
Subaru slowly looked up into her face, his eyes red and cheeks wet with tears. “W-What are you talking about?”
Regina placed her other hand on her chest above her heart. “As a Sin Archbishop, not only would you two be under my protection, but as a wedding gift I shall help you gain your revenge for the blue maid against Gluttony. The little heathen is an eyesore and if it would ease your pain, then I shall promise to end the one who ate Rem’s name. Afterwards, the Cult shall never target you two again- not without violating my rights.”
He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Had she not listened to a single thing he said? There was no way he was joining the Cult!
Regina extended a finger in front of his face and waggled it back and forth like an impatient school teacher.
“Before you say whatever foolish idea comes to your head, allow me to continue. By becoming my husband, you are not joining the Cult- you are merely aligning yourself with me. The same will be said for the maid. Not only that, but I shall even help you conclude your business here on top of providing the promised wedding gift. After that, however, you and the maid are coming with me. I shall not accept anything less from what belongs to me. You would be wise to see my generosity for what it truly is, the boundless blessings of the divine, as such boons shall not be offered again. What shall it be, my dear Subaru Natsuki? Will you willingly comply with my divine plan and become mine, or will you disappoint a goddess at your peril? Choose now, for I am no longer in the mood to entertain your blubbering. I expect your answer immediately. Do you understand, Subaru Natsuki?”
Subaru gritted his teeth. Yes, unfortunately, he understood perfectly. This Sin Archbishop, to annihilate Petelguese with such ease, was far more powerful of a foe, meaning there was no way he could beat her. If he looped, not only would he be right back at square one, but this woman would have Rem again as they searched for him. Who knows if he’d be able to save her?
If he married her, then he could be with Rem. It wasn’t ideal, and if he were honest it wasn’t even appealing, but she was going to take Rem anyway. He’d lose his Rem and never see her again. She’d be condemned to a life of servitude, forgotten by the world, to the very people she hates the most.
He couldn’t let that happen. While he had no way to save her, perhaps he could with time. Perhaps he could figure out how to get out of this if he played along for now. There was no way he was going to let Rem go through this alone, not after everything she has done for him. She meant far too much to him.
The choice was clear, though he didn’t like it.
He had to protect Rem, even if it meant…
“Fine,” Subaru said. “I’ll go with you. Just please help me protect everyone, and let me be with Rem.”
Regina tilted her head, “Oh? Does this mean you do not wish to accept my aid in slaying Gluttony?”
“Fuck that!” Subaru growled. “No, I want Gluttony dead for Rem’s sake! I mean I’ll accept your offer in its entirety, just don’t go back on your word.”
Not that I could do anything about it if you did…
The walk through the woods was mostly silent. Subaru carried Rem bridal style in his arms while Regina walked beside him, asking him questions about himself and the blue oni. While Subaru was honest about his own past and feelings, he chaffed at being forced to be friendly with a Sin Archbishop, even if she did spare Rem and save his life. So far, Regina was arrogant and self-assured, but she hadn’t been unpleasant so far.
He thought so until Rem began to wake up.
It started with her subtly shifting as he held her, then her eyelids fluttered. Subaru noticed this and immediately stopped to watch her wake up. His smile split his features when she slowly opened those beautiful blue eyes. Rem focused on his smiling face and burst into tears of joy as she threw her arms around his neck.
“Subaru! Subaru, you’re alive! Thank the Od, you’re alive!” Rem cried in relief, her hold ironclad as Subaru sank to the ground and let her sit in his lap so that he could hug her.
“I should be saying that to you!” Subaru said past a lump in his throat and crushed the girl to him. “I really didn’t know if I’d ever see you again!”
Overjoyed at being reunited with her beloved, Rem pulled away and pressed her forehead to his with a bright smile on her lips. “I never doubted for a moment.”
Subaru felt his heart swell in his chest for the girl in his arms. He wanted to break down right here and now, but he couldn’t afford that just yet. Not when…
He felt Rem tense up and immediately try to jump out of his arms as she screamed, “You! ”
Oh shit, here we go… Subaru thought as he pulled Rem back against his chest.
The blue maid struggled and squirmed as Regina looked down upon them both impatiently, her hands on her slender hips. Rem was spouting venom towards the unbothered Sin Archbishop of Greed, which only made Subaru anxious. He had no idea what would set this woman off and he didn’t want to find out.
“Rem, Rem, please, listen to me! It’s okay, we have a truce!” Subaru pleaded with the maid, startling the blue maid into turning to look at him in horror.
“A truce? What do you mean? How could you, Subaru…?” Rem’s voice trembled with betrayal and rage.
It hurt Subaru to see her look at him like that. Those tearful eyes cut open an already bleeding wound in his heart because they reminded him of Emilia and his talk with Puck. The last thing he could take right now was Rem turning on him, too.
Thankfully and unfortunately, Regina chose now to speak up.
“Subaru Natsuki and yourself now belong to me.” Regina said and waved away Rem’s turmoil with a flippant hand gesture. “I have taken you both under my protection and have agreed to assist you for now. Maid, your name is Rem, yes? As someone precious to my fiance, I have gifted you to him. Serve him well.”
“Subaru doesn’t belong to anyone, especially not some disgusting Cultist!” Rem snapped, her eyes promising absolute death as she practically gnashed her teeth. “How dare you take him hostage! How dare you force yourself on my reason to die!”
Regina’s eye twitched dangerously.
Subaru grabbed Rem’s face and pulled it to look at him and only him as sweat rolled down his face and his heart hammered in his chest. This was bad, very bad. He had no idea how the hell he would manage another loop if Regina killed them, nor did he want to go through the pain of losing Rem again and again. Anything but that!
“Rem, please, just focus on me, okay?” Subaru said, terrified. “Look at me and nothing else. Regina killed Sloth to save me, and if we don’t go with her, then… then I’m going to lose you. I can’t lose you, Rem. I can’t survive that again.”
The blue maid’s eyebrows knitted together. “Again? Subaru, what do you mean?”
“Nothing!” He said out of habit, then added, “It’s just, I almost lost you already. Just trust me, please? Please, I’m begging you to trust me. We’re going to be okay. I’ll make sure of it.”
Rem’s eyes searched his own, still angry and hurt, but softening with the trust she did have in him. Subaru has been nothing but amazing to her from the moment he came into her life. He was her heart, her reason, and if he needed her to trust him now, then… even if she loathed it, Rem had faith that he knew what he was doing. Subaru has never misled her before.
“Alright…” Rem muttered, looking sick to her stomach. “If you… If you truly believe this is right, then I’ll follow you, Subaru. I promise I’ll protect you.”
Subaru breathed a sigh of relief and pressed his forehead to Rem’s again. “Thank you, Rem…”
Even while Subaru closed his eyes, Rem’s eyes sharply cut upwards towards Regina who was now looking quite pleased.
“If you two are done, let us make haste.” Regina said with a smug smile. “I would prefer to make it to this village you speak of before nightfall.”
“Y-Yeah, let’s do that!” Subaru said and began to stand with Rem in his arms again.
The blue maid gasped and looked up at him in confusion, “Subaru, I’m quite capable of walking…”
“Don’t you try to hide how exhausted you are.” Subaru scolded her good-naturedly with a playful wink. “You were amazing today, so I’m sure you’re about to pass out any second now. Just let your hero carry you to the village and we’ll get there in no time!”
Rem’s face burned crimson as an uneasy, yet uncontrolled smile graced her lips. Her love for him only grew, if that was even possible. It’s why she was afraid of how the Sin Archbishop would react.
The damn thing had no objections to slinging her around like a sack of tatoes earlier, so why would she let Subaru carry her?
To her surprise, Regina paid no mind other than to comment on their pace and how it violated her rights to a speedy resolution of the evening. While that put her at ease, she refused to let down her guard. Regina was a Sin Archbishop, a dangerous and insane woman. The last thing Rem would ever do is let down her guard around her.
Subaru was right about one thing, however; Rem really was tired. She rested her head against his shoulder as he carried her through the forest and breathed in the scent of sweat, smoke, dirt, and just that unique smell that belonged to only him. It was comforting. At least that still made sense.
Neither Rem nor Subaru could understand what exactly this arrangement would entail, so right now, they chose to just take strength from each other’s closeness.
By the time they reached the village, it was getting close to dark. The first one to greet them was Patrasche, who had survived the encounter with Petelguese that claimed Otto’s life and returned to the village in search of him. The ground dragon ran to him, eager to claim her rightful affections, but stopped when Rem met her stare with her own.
Invisible sparks arced between the two, but Rem refused to give up her spot in Subaru’s arms. Having Regina to deal with was bad enough, she was in no mood to share anything more of her beloved with anyone, ground dragon or otherwise.
Patrasche was not amused, but the proud creature accepted Subaru’s chin scratches from the hand he used to cradle Rem’s shoulder as compensation.
Subaru, Rem, and Regina were then met with the encouraging cheers of soldiers at the news of Petelguese’s defeat, as well as the inquisitive stares as to how Rem had returned, along with the appearance of the strangely dressed woman.
Of course, Regina just had to make sure she was noticed.
“My name is Regina Corneas, the divine goddess betrothed to the hero Subaru Natsuki.” Regina boldly proclaimed when people asked for her identity.
Subaru had a heart attack, but was thankful that at least she hadn’t announced herself as the ‘Sin Archbishop of Greed’. He could accept the dubious stares of the soldiers, including Felix and Julius, if Regina would just keep that to herself. There was no way he could logically explain that.
Rem, meanwhile, was oozing murderous intent and jealousy as she clung to Subaru possessively.
After being teased and prodded to death, Subaru, Rem, and Regina finally made it to a dragon carriage currently being pulled by an irritable Patrasche. As the three sat down, Subaru noticed that they were the only three occupants. While strange, he was actually quite thankful. He was really just wanting a bit of peace and quiet.
Rem sat beside him, while Regina sat across from them both. The blue maid leaned against Subaru’s shoulder and struggled to keep her eyes open, so Subaru put an arm around her and let her use him as a body pillow. The blushing maid was thankful and cuddled into his side, but stubbornly refused sleep.
They both eyed Regina for any signs of jealousy or anger, but the Goddess of Greed just stared at them in amusement.
“What’s so funny?” Subaru asked Regina.
“I am simply pleased that I gifted the maid to you.” Regina replied. “You are quite devoted to each other, which goes to show that you should be grateful to me for your lives. I am nothing if not benevolent.”
Rem frowned and narrowed her eyes. “You attacked the caravan with the intention of slaughtering us all. How is that ‘benevolent’?”
Subaru began to sweat bullets once again, but Regina merely chuckled into the back of her hand.
“Silly girl, you misunderstand. I was there because I was requested to be, not because I wanted to be. It’s not my fault that as I stood there, minding my own business, that your carriages decided to ram me instead of stopping out of respect for my divine right to stand where I please.”
“Innocent people are dead because of you, and that’s your excuse?!” Rem growled, but calmed when Subaru squeezed her arm.
Regina grinned. “Such a fiery little maid. I’m sure my dear fiancé will benefit greatly from having you.”
Subaru and Rem both blushed furiously. The way she said that sounded almost… lewd. Surely that can’t be right.
“Uh… Yeah.” Subaru muttered, choosing to take it in the most platonic way possible to avoid dying on the spot. “Yeah, thank you for sparing Rem. I’m very… grateful.”
“As you should be, my dear!” Regina said and ignored Rem bristling. “Truly you see now that I am a kind and generous goddess. So long as you are loyal and obey me, I shall take care of your needs. Mutual respect and understanding is the firm foundation for a strong marriage, and I aim to make it so.”
Subaru and Rem didn't know how to take an overpowered sociopath lecturing them on what it takes to make a marriage last. They were glancing nervously at each other and Regina when the Sin Archbishop rested her elbows on her knees, steeple her fingers in front of her face, and leaned towards them with a perverse smile. Her golden eyes were laser focused and pinned them to their seats.
Regina’s grin grew as her eyes scanned the two of them up and down.
“Now, for the most important question. Tell me, are you two virgins?”