Whose Line Is It Anyway?
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Summary
Some say Camelot’s laundry is cleaned by a miracle. Others say by a fairy.
Really, it’s just Merlin.
Merlin, who has no idea he’s become a divine cleaning entity.
Or: what if Merlin using that stain removal spell in Episode 1 of Season 4 somehow led to the formation of a fanatical cult, ritual sock parades and Arthur in crop tops?
Series
- Part 1 of Whose Line Is It Anyway?
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“Ah, I’m unavailable on Thursday evenings, young warlock,” Kilgharrah’s voice intoned, with what Merlin could only describe as deeply apologetic gravitas. “That is a night dedicated to... personal growth and self-reflection.”
“You’re booked?” Merlin asked, tone teetering between disbelief and insult.
“Yes, I have boundaries, Merlin,” Kilgharrah replied, as though that settled the matter entirely.
Merlin stood in the dragon-summoning field, utterly flummoxed and vaguely offended. A dragon—his dragon, the last of its kind, ancient and mighty and presumably unaffected by anything less than cataclysmic events—was skipping a monster-of-the-week consultation for what sounded suspiciously like a self-care evening.
This could only mean one thing. He was enchanted, or brainwashed, or indoctrinated by a sinister, emotionally manipulative cult. Merlin knew the type. Smiles that didn’t quite reach the eyes. Cloaks. Tea and biscuits—probably Custard Creams.
Whatever it was, Merlin was going to get to the bottom of it.
Or: The one where the Great Dragon joins a support group to stop speaking in riddles and Merlin accidentally has a full emotional breakdown over a Rich Tea biscuit
Series
- Part 2 of Whose Line Is It Anyway?
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Now They Call Him The Poet King: The Madness That One Lie Can Bring by Pikaroo
Fandoms: Merlin (TV)
30 Jul 2025
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“Merlin,” Arthur said, catching the servant as he returned from whatever useless errand he’d been pretending to attend to, “have you noticed people are rhyming?”
Merlin blinked at him, then tilted his head with theatrical puzzlement. “Rhyming? Not that I’ve heard. That would be absurd.”
Arthur stared. “You just did it.”
“Did what?” Merlin asked, his face the perfect picture of blank idiocy.
“That—that thing,” Arthur spluttered. “You just rhymed ‘heard’ and ‘absurd’.”
“Did I?” Merlin scratched his ear. “Are you sure you’ve got the right… word?”
Arthur’s eye twitched.
Or: what if Merlin’s “I'm teaching him some poetry” lie in Season 5, Episode 3 spiralled into a full-blown cultural movement featuring knights training in iambic pentameter, laws being written in verse, and a king begging his manservant to please just speak normally?
Series
- Part 3 of Whose Line Is It Anyway?
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Summary
When a ghost allegedly haunts Camelot’s halls, the Knights of the Round Table embark on a midnight investigation. Leon’s sceptical, Percival’s hiding on top of the table, Arthur’s hunting for snacks, and Merlin…is why there’s a ghost rumour in the first place.
Series
- Part 4 of Whose Line Is It Anyway?