Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Izuku definitely changed. 

Katsuki could tell. After Auntie Inko's death, Izuku did a whole one-eighty. Katsuki remembered when he was told what happened.

...

Katsuki sighed as he opened the front door. He closed and locked it back and was about to go upstairs to his room until he heard his mom crying. He had no idea why she would be crying. He'd only seen her cry once before and that was when he was four after Izuku was diagnosed quirkless.

He walked in on her with her head in her hands, and his dad rubbing circles in her back.

He sat down and asked what was going on, and then he was told.

Inko was killed during a villain attack. Inko and Izuku went to the mall to get him some new clothes after his others were destroyed - courtesy of his explosions - and she was taken hostage. She was killed right in front of Izuku's eyes after saving him from taking her place.

The villain got away and there was massive amounts of property damage - courtesy of the hero there, Endeavor - there were only two more deaths and about two dozen injured.

Despite all that, Katsuki only cared about the one death that was Inko. He had purely good memories of her, and he truly did love her like his own Auntie.

...

And Izuku... Katsuki still didn't know what to do.

Izuku became a mystery to him. He was a mystery he wanted to solve. Katsuki also changed, but not as drastically as Izuku. Many noticed that Katsuki was more subdued than usual and how he laid off on bullying people as much. His lackeys also noticed but said nothing in fear of becoming treated like one of his victims.

Katsuki laid off more, but had an occasional outburst every now and then to keep up appearances.

Katsuki noticed the new scars appearing on Izuku, mainly around his wrists. Katsuki's mind went numb at what he was thinking. 

'The nerd couldn't be cutting himself, could he?' 

Katsuki's mind felt like it was foggy. All of this was partially his fault. 

If only he didn't bully Izuku.

If only he didn't ruin his clothes. Thdy never would have gone to the mall that day and Auntie Inko wouldn't be dead.

If only he didn't hurt Izuku so bad that they could never become friends again. It was all his fault.

He wanted to fix this. He wanted the old Izuku back, the one who would light up every time he would see a new hero debut, or a villain take down. The one who had uncontrollable muttering. The one who would chase after his dreams no matter what. The one whose smile could light up the room. The one whose smile threatened to blind him with how bright it was. It was a smile he would chase after to get back, and it was something he would kill to see again, even once.

For he was Katsuki Bakugou, and he was said to be the best, and the best would always got what they wanted. So if he wanted Izuku's smile, he would get that smile.

And at this point he didn't know if it was for the sakes of Izuku, Inko, or himself.

...

Izuku knew that he changed.

He knew that Kacchan could tell. It was telling in the way how he pulled a whole 180 in the way he treated him.

Would it be bad for Izuku to say that he craved the normalcy and routine of being bullied for once?

Ever since his mother died, everything changed, and it was never for the better when dealing with him.

...

As a quirkless child, things would never be good for him. Nobody cared about the freak of evolution. They were better than him and they knew it. Especially at school.

But now everything is changing. Kacchan doesn't bully him anymore. He's going to be moved to an orphanage and he's not even sure if he'll still go to the same school as him. His father is still away in ‘America’.

'What a load of crap that was. If he really hated me for being quirkless, he could've said so instead of leaving... like the coward he is.'

It wouldn't hurt to say that Izuku hated his father. In fact, he despised him.

And that was one of many things that built up, and up, and up, until Izuku couldn't take it anymore. And it seemed that it would be sooner than later that Izuku reached his last straw.

And well... Straws can be broken very easily.

Chapter Text

A few birds flew away as some rocks were kicked their way, but Izuku was too out of it to pay attention. 

Despite the fact that Kacchan stopped bullying him, it didn't mean he was suddenly popular. He was still bullied by other students that thought it would be a good idea to fill Kacchans role.

And today, they suicide-baited him.

He really wanted to leave that school, but unfortunately for him, he couldn't just yet. He didn't feel comfortable at school nor at the orphanage. He always felt confined as if he was in a cage. 

He hated it.

Izuku always felt more comfortable being high up, sitting on top of a table every now and then escalated to sneaking out at night and hopping on buildings. He was reprimanded by many different heroes but he couldn't bring it in him to stop.

So he didn't.

He thought about finding him a roof to perch on for a while and sort out his thoughts. It wouldn't be too hard to find one anyway, there's plenty of abandoned buildings that no one would bother him on. His brain noticed that he was passing under some sort of tunnel, but Izuku paid it no mind. He knew this area like the back of his hand.

It wasn't until he felt a slimy liquid pass over his skin and the air knocked out of lungs that he realized that he should've been paying more attention. Izuku could hear words coming from them, but it was muffled in his ears. 

His lungs burned with the effort it took to breathe, and his eyes stung with unshed tears. His nose began to fill up, and his head seemed to pound loudly in his ears. His throat hurt with an undescribable feeling, one that he was familiar with due to being a 'crybaby'.

'Well, it may not be suicide... but at least I'll die like they want me to.' Izuku thought grimly. If he could, he would grimace.

As black spots began to crawl up the edges of his vision, he saw a large figure come out of nowhere.

‘Is that All Might-?!’ He thought, passing out immediately after.

---

“Kid! Hey, kid! Wake up!” 

Izuku could faintly hear a voice saying. He blinked a few times, taking in his surroundings. 

All Might was standing over him.

Izuku scrambled to his feet and snatched up his notebook from off the ground.

“A-All Might! Could I get your autograph?” Izuku stammered, his face reddening more every second.

“It's already in there, my boy.” All Might replied, scooping the soda bottles he placed the villain in. Izuku flipped a few pages until he found the signature spread across two pages.

“Well, I must be going now. Stay safe young man.” He said, powering up to jump.

“W-Wait! All Might! I have a question for you!” Izuku yelled, he saw that All Might was about to leave so he did the only other thing he could think of, and jumped.

---

And if he learned that All Might had a second form in the process, it was just another secret to keep.

“Do you think... Do you think I could become a hero without a quirk?” Izuku asked, fidgeting nervously.

All Might sighed, and Izuku didn't think he was going to respond the way he wanted him to.

“I think it would be better for you to be more realistic. You would do well as a cop or doctor, they work with heroes often. A quirkless person would only be a liability.” 

Izuku felt that his world crumbled around him.

“Now I really must be leaving, someone should let you through the door.” All Might said before jumping away one last time.

A quirkless person would only be a liability.

Deku, you can't become a hero without a quirk!

I'm sorry to tell you, miss, but your child is quirkless.

Useless

Quirkless

Liability

Deku

Izuku laughed. It began as small snorts and chuckles, until it grew into full on cackling. Tears streamed down his face, but he couldn't bring himself to stop. He fell to his knees, scraping his plans on the hard concrete.

“I'll never amount to anything, will I?” He choked out, tears filling his mouth.

He noticed that he was pretty high up, high enough to die if he fell off of the building. 

‘It's not like I have anyone that would miss me.. besides I'll be doing what my classmates wanted.’

So Izuku picked himself up, and jumped.

---

Izuku was met with crisp white sheets and blinding white lights. Everything was so white. 

Though despite how well they cleaned the floors, Izuku could still see areas that were too white, too clean. Tiny cracks on the walls and seemingly invisible tears in the sheets. Izuku could see all of it and it unnerved him.

He was never so hyper aware of everything, and now it seemed that his senses were heightened.

Izuku thought that he would be dead by now, but instead he just developed two new quirks, his mom's and dad's quirks. His body was placed under a lot of stress during his failed suicide attempt, and his body didn't know which quirk would help better.

So he got both.

He knew that he had telekinesis, as once he was finally alone in his room for once, he was able to pick up his glass of water. He dropped it afterwards because he lost focus - he was really excited to see it work - and was placed under an even tighter watch.

It was completely worth it to him though.

He was allowed to watch TV, so he turned it on and the first thing it was on was the news. He was about to change the channel, until he saw what was being reported.

'Kacchan... Was attacked by the same villain that I was? I thought that All Might captured that villain.'

He was fine, but he could've died had All Might not came and captured the sludge villain - again - and saved him.

Izuku watched the recording that was shown on the news and analyzed the situation the best that he could.

Many of the heroes there could've done something to help, even if they couldn't defeat the villain. 

For example, Backdraft. His water could've put out some of the flames that were started due to Kacchans explosions, or watered down the sludge.

Then Izuku spotted All Might's smaller form in the crowd. The footage was slightly blurry around the edges but Izuku could see him clearly.

Rage boiled up deep within Izuku and it prickled his skin. It made him itchy, really itchy. His hand reached up to scratch at his neck, but he stopped himself.

He sighed and sat up. 

'These next few months are going to be hard.'

But Izuku resolved to push through. He resloved to fix this flawed society. He resolved to stop all of the bad heroes. He wanted reform, and he would get it.

But first, it was time to sleep.

Chapter Text

To say Izuku was mad was an understatement. He was livid. He could feel the rage bubbling under the surface of his skin, threatening to boil over and spill out. His fists clenched tightly, leaving crescent shaped marks in his palms. His bandages protested at the movement, as he still wasn't completely healed from that day of the sludge incident.

Rage almost consumed him for a second because he knew that those kids had taken all of this things. 

He bit his lip to keep from yelling but he could tell it was a losing battle if he didn't find his stuff soon enough. He really wanted to give in and yell some hateful words at the other orphans there.

This was why he hated leaving for extended amounts of time. The kids at the orphanage did not like him and the feeling was mutual. But this time, Izuku thought they went a bit too far. 

They stole his things, and now they're probably ruined. He had all his prized possessions together. He felt like breaking down once again. He'd never felt so alone in his life.

The only picture of his mother was with his things, and now it was gone. So were his notebooks but they could be easily replaced. His only picture of his very dead mom? Not so much.

He was about to get up from his corner of the room and stomp over to the other kids before he felt a familiar presence behind him. He turned around to meet the soft hazel eyes of Mrs. Hamako. She was one of the caretakers there and was the only one he trusted there.

She was partially deaf, so he made sure to learn JSL so they could communicate better. It took him a while, but it was worth it to see her beaming smile the first time she saw him reply back to her using sign language.

She was the only adult that he had trusted ever since his mother's death. Nobody else cared about him, but she did. He would hate to leave her, but it had to be done. He just *couldn't* stay, no matter how much he loved her. He hated it here, and there was only so much that she could do. Izuku would have to take it into his own hands, and leave.

She was the one that came to get him from the hospital once he was released. She told him that someone in the building he jumped off of saw him and tried to get help. Mrs. Hamako looked really relieved that he was still alive, but was still worried about what could've drove him to attempt suicide. 

He didn't respond when she eventually asked him. He said he was fine now. It was the truth he was fine now. (The burning itch for revenge under his skin suggested otherwise).

Mrs. Hamako had placed a warm, soft hand on his shoulder. She gave him a soft smile before removing it and signaling him to come with her. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and followed behind her with his head down. He knew that if he looked up at the other kids, he'd snap at them.

He swore that nobody would mess with his things and get away with it.

He sent a small smile to Mrs. Hamako as he sat down and got comfortable in her office. Her brown hair seemed to shine in the little sunlight that streamed in through the window. 

‘I saw the other kids with your things and got them for you.' She signed, reaching under her desk to grab them.

Tears welled up in his eyes as she pulled out his things, everything was safe. 

‘Thank you, Mrs. Hamako!’ He replied, almost bouncing in his seat with how happy he was.

She then laid everything on her desk and let him sort it out. Everything was there. Everything was safe. He felt as if he could breathe again, and the tight feeling that was threatening to suffocate him left. 

But then he saw one of the only two pictures he had.

One was a picture of him and Bakugou. The two boys were young, it was before Izuku didn't get his quirk and Katsuki did. Someone ripped the picture, it was nothing that couldn't be fixed. But he still didn't like it. 

There was a rip right down the center, between the two of them. It seemed almost as if life was mocking him, saying that they would never make up. That they would never become friends, that they would never be anything except rivals and enemies. 

And Izuku almost agreed with that statement. They were both chasing after each other, striving to become the best. Izuku was tired of never getting anything he wanted. So he swore that he would surpass him, and become better.

But he wanted to try. He wanted to give the other boy a second chance. And if he didn't take it, that didn't bother Izuku in the slightest.

He didn't need him.

---

Izuku knew what he was going to do the next few months until the entrance exam. He'd enrolled into an online school so he could complete his education without being bullied at two different places everyday, the orphanage was enough. He also wanted to learn how to fight, and he wanted to gain muscles. To learn how to fight, he needed contacts. To gain muscles, he just needed to know a good place. Luckily for him, he grew up around here.

Dagobah beach was perfect considering he would be cleaning and basically working out at the same time. Now the only problem was gaining contacts, and being able to get with someone who could train him. The first two options he thought of were Himiko Toga and The Hero Killer: Stain. They were both skilled with knives (and swords too for Stain) and they knew how to fight and intimate an opponent. Izuku's only questions were ‘Who to train with?’ and ‘How to find them?’.

Simple, train with both of them, and on how to find them, Izuku could track Stain's movements based on the amount of kills he did in an area. Izuku could find Toga via underground broker, Giran.

So in-between training on the beach, he did his school work and learned more about coding and hacking. Then one day he finally gotten a message from Giran.

He was able to meet Himiko Toga.

---

He had 8 months left until the UA exams. Things were finally going his way with him being able to meet Toga. Izuku had an address that he walked in to and was met with Giran himself.

“You must be Deku,” Giran said, the name rolling off his tongue.

Izuku nodded, his face hidden under a mask and hoodie. Even though he decided to use the name Deku in the underworld - only for now as he knew he would have to change it because too many people knew it - his green hair was hard to hide and he couldn't get hair dye on the spot.

Giran looked him over for a second before seeming to approve of something and leading him to the area where Toga was.

“I don't see why you would want to meet her, unless you're just as insane as she is.” He grumbled. “Just don't die, kid.”

“Don't worry, I won-” Izuku was cut off by a knife flying past his left ear. It narrowly missed it.

“You must be Deku! Can I call you Deku-kun?” Toga asked, bouncing on the heels of her feet.

“Uh, yes... I'm Deku, and sure.” Izuku mumbled, struggling to say something.

Giran raised an eyebrow, “Are you sure you're good, kid?”

Izuku looked him in the eye. “I'm fine."

They both knew that was a lie, but neither one brought it up.

Giran hated seeing someone as young as Izuku turning to villainy. They still had their entire life in front of them and it was going to be thrown away because of a horrible system, and most likely horrible and abusive people around them. People in the underworld usually drew the line at doing things to kids, except for some sickos. Giran was one of those who actually cared about the kids.

But Giran recognized that look in his eye. He could see how tired the kid was with everything, but in front of that there was a fiery determination to change that, to change the world. Giran feared what this kid would do.

He knew that Izuku could and probably would change the world. Giran just hoped that he was still on his good side by then.

---

Izuku never knew he could feel so sore in his entire life. Toga - or Himi-chan as she insisted he call her - kept hitting him with knife after knife. Luckily they were dull, so the most that she did to him was bruise his body, a fact that she didn't like because she wanted to see his blood. 

She said that he was pretty skilled for an amateur, and Izuku hoped that whatever skills he learned would be enough to pass the UA Entrance exam. Despite everything that has happened to him, he still wanted to go to UA. He knew that he would probably be considered more morally gray, but he really didn't care.

Izuku didn't want to become a villain, he wanted to be a hero - though he would probably change his mind pretty soon about that.

“Deku-kun! You did really good for our first time! When you get better we can use the sharper knives.” She exclaimed, her excitement bleeding through her words.

“Thank you, Himi-chan. I'll try to get better so we could use the sharper knives.” He said with a shark like grin, her excitement latching onto him.

Giran felt chills go down his back as he looked in on them, he really wanted didn't want to get on their badsides.

---

Izuku trained with her 3 times a week, and sometimes trained on his own when he wasn't too sore. Any other time, he was hacking through some things like the cameras in the city, or Aldera's database. He also tracked down Stain's movements and noticed a pattern.

Stain didn't leave a city until he killed a certain amount of heroes, and he usually targeted them alone and in alleys. The places he picked were often in the blindspots of the city cameras, which both pleased and irritated Izuku. Pleased because Stain was actually smart, irritated because it made his job harder.  

From what he could read from the news and the little he could see from city cameras, his quirk was related to blood. Luckily for Izuku, he was just able to get himself a costume from Giran which would protect him from the slashes of Stain's blade. It was pretty expensive, but the untraceable computer he bought costed more so Izuku wasn't too worried about it.

He was just glad he was able to get a job with him being a "late bloomer" - ignoring the fact he stole from the rich every once in a while. He didn't like it, but it was a little thing in the grand scheme of things.

Besides, a little petty crime wouldn't hurt anybody.

Izuku also got lucky in the fact that Stain's current location was only about an hour away on train. Izuku would have to get to him tonight, or else Stain would probably move somewhere farther away. 

He'd been training with Toga for about 2 months and on his own for 4 months. He'd also been eating a bit more healthier and gained more muscles, he was still pretty small but he looked different than he did a few months ago.

He also was on Toga's level of skill with a knife - Toga said he was a fast learner, and he knew at this point they were just honing his fighting style at this point.

So Izuku thought that he was ready to confront Stain.

---

He thought wrong, considering a knife was flung in his direction as soon as Stain heard his footsteps.

“That wasn't very nice of you. What happened to introductions? Or even a simple ‘Hello’?” Izuku said, standing in the shadows.

“Who are you?” Stain hissed, his eyes scanning the area and his weapons ready. Izuku knew he was on high alert so he'd have to be careful.

“Stain, or should I say Stendhal... or maybe even Chizome Akaguro, I'd say that you can call me Void.” Izuku said with false cheer in his voice, his words containing an underlying threat. It immediately set Stain even more on edge as the voice changer he bought earlier that day concealed his real voice and made his words echo around the small alley. 

Izuku clasped his hands together and stepped into the moonlight.

“How do you know that name?” 

“It wasn't too hard to find out. You really should cover your tracks up better. It wouldn't be too hard to find more and perhaps release that information.”

Stain growled, flinging another knife at Izuku. Izuku dodged with an inaudible yelp.

“I honestly just wanted to talk, because we could be useful to each other y'know. My intelligence and knowledge could help you, and your combat skills could help me. What do you say?” Izuku tried, his palms sweaty.

Stain stopped to think for a second.

“What exactly do you want out of me?"

Izuku grinned and despite it not being visible, Stain felt chills trail down his back.

“I want you to train me.”

And after a few more minor violent outbursts and some talking, it was settled. Stain almost felt sorry for anyone that would encounter Izuku.

Almost.

---

Izuku only had about 3 more months until the entrance exams and he was bored. He'd already learned so much from Toga ranging from knife throwing to concealing his presence, and those skills were only honed and added onto by Stain. He still had more to learn from Stain, but his harsh methods barely counted as teaching.

He needed a change of scenery but he didn't know where to find it.

So he decided to take a short delve into UA's security systems. You can't blame him considering he had nothing else to do until the exams except train and he'd already done more than enough of that. They were hard to try to hack into, but that was exactly what Izuku wanted.

He needed a challenge.

And if Nezu was sitting in his office watching him trying his hardest, Izuku didn't have to know.

---

UA Entrance exams were tomorrow and he was practically bouncing on his feet. Both of his quirks simmered under the surface of his skin, his dad's quirk still unknown for the time being. Izuku had practically mastered Telekinesis, due to his analyzing skills and what he could find on forums.

He'd also had a little bit of quirk counseling because he was a late bloomer, but he eventually didn't need it because of all the progress he made on his own.

Of course, there was always room to improve, but for now it should be good enough to get in.

He made sure to study plenty over the past few weeks so he would remember the material for the written portion of the exam. He thought he was prepared enough for it and should get in.

So now the only thing he could do would to be sleep - or try and hack into UA again.

His choice should be obvious.