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English
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Published:
2024-02-28
Updated:
2024-04-20
Words:
2,267
Chapters:
4/?
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73
Kudos:
36
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Weird Science!

Summary:

Liam is a mad scientist.
Hijinks ensue.

Chapter 1: hit show hfjONE haha. get it.

Summary:

liam blows up a microwave

Chapter Text

[2:40 AM: SOMEWHERE, USA.]

 

Liam is currently concocting his latest experiment in the kitchen of their huge fucking apartment. It throws shit together in a mixing bowl and pops it into the microwave when suddenly—

 

BOOM!

 

The microwave explodes. At 2:40 in the fucking morning. 

Liam immediately goes to try and put the fire out but not before Bryce rushes into the kitchen. “WHAT THE FUCK HA—” he cuts himself off upon seeing Liam holding a fire extinguisher and the burning microwave.

 

“WHY THE HELL IS THE MICROWAVE ON FIRE?!”

“I was experimenting” :) 

Bryce sighs loudly, “You’re paying for a new microwave.”

“Okay sure.” Liam responds… he doesn’t have any fucking money though. 

 

Amelia walks out of her bedroom, sleepily rubbing her eyes. “Stop FUCKING yelling, I have work tomorrow.”

“Sorry, Ame!” Liam says, messing with his hands. Bryce groans, “Yeah. Sorry Ames.”

“All good. I’m going back to bed. Please put out the fire!” She chimes before heading back into her room.

 

“Okay anyway. WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING???” Bryce exasperatedly yells while shaking Liam by the shoulders.

It puts its hands up defensively, “It was an accident! I swear!”

“HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY BLOW UP A MICROWAVE???”

 

Texty perks up from their… so-called nap. “Amelia said to stop yelling. SO STOP YELLING FOR GOD'S SAKE.”

“Oh my god she’s going to kill us.” Liam mutters.

“I’LL KILL YOU IF YOU DON’T—” Texty cuts Bryce off, “Uh. guys. The fire’s spreading.”

 

“.... shit.” Liam just… picks up the flaming microwave and tosses it out of the window, shattering said window in the process.

“Problem solved!”

 

“... Liam, we need to get you on new meds.” Bryce says with a completely dumbfounded expression. “Maybe!”

 

And the apartment was spared from being burned down by Liam’s insane methods of disposing of the fire… yay.

Chapter 2: A truck driver, a fast food manager, a mad scientist, and a robot walk into a bar—

Summary:

Mystery solving with airy, bryce, liam, and texty
It goes as well as you'd expect.

Notes:

fun fact i was considering writing airy with a heavy southern accent but i decided against it for your sanity (and mine)
ps. i hate writing four characters at once oh my fuckig god

Chapter Text

[3:00 AM: SOMEWHERE, USA.]

 

A figure in a dark hoodie stands outside of epic burger™ with a canister of gasoline and a few matches in hand. Technically it would just be easier to (somehow) cause a gas leak and light a match but that’d be actual suicide, so conventional arson it is.

They pour gasoline around the perimeters, and strike a match before running off. Successfully setting epic burger™ ablaze.

 

[6:30 AM: SOMEWHERE, USA.]

 

There’s a loud knock on the door, one that’s so jaw-droppingly loud that it literally shakes the entire apartment.

Liam jolts awake and begrudgingly opens the door, only to see an unfamiliar man… or whatever that creature is. They look like they just crawled out of a fucking swamp.

 

“... hey sooo… epic burger™ burnt down.”

“Ok. what does that have to do with me?”

“i thought the manager lived here?”

 

“Oh right. Bryce. Yeah he lives here. One sec.”

Liam walks off for a second. “HEY FUCKFACE SOMEONE’S HERE TO SEE YOU.”

“OH GODDAMMIT.” Bryce walks back instead of Liam. thankfully.

“...hi.”

“Who the hell are you?”

“i’m airy.”

“How did you get my address.”

“... don’t worry about it. anyways, epic burger™ burned down. my truck was in the parking lot.”

 

Liam giggles in a totally not sus way in the background, causing Bryce to turn around. ”LIAM. I SWEAR TO GOD IF IT WAS YOU, I WILL PURPOSEFULLY LOSE YOU IN AN IKEA AND LEAVE YOU THERE.”

Liam frowns in response, “Wow… you’re so mean.”

Bryce just flips Liam off.

Airy just. Continues staring at the two. Is that a robot watching family guy on the tv? FAMILY GUY? OF ALL THINGS?

 

“Sorry about that. What happened to your truck?”

“... it... exploded.”

“Shit. Okay, well. What does that have to do with me?”

“the police don’t care and you’re the manager sooo…”

 

“Shit.” Bryce rubs his temples. “Okay. what do you want me to do?”

“help me find the person behind it.” Airy says, messing with his hands.

 

Bryce loudly sighs, “Fine. we’ll help.”

 

“We?” Liam perks up, raising an eyebrow, “what do you mean ‘we’?”

Bryce turns to face Liam again, “YES. WE. YOU’RE GETTING INVOLVED TOO, GENIUS. YOU KNOW SHIT ABOUT SCIENCE AND MIGHT BE ABLE TO HELP US.”
“Fine. Am I at least getting paid?”

 

Both of them turn to face Airy. “uh… no. my money was in the truck.”

“... I’m not doing it unless i’m getting pai—”

“We’ll help.” Bryce says, cutting Liam off completely. “oh. ok thanks.”

In return, Liam groans. “FIIINE. Let me get out of my pajamas first. Asshole.”

 

“Shit. I gotta get out of mine.”

 

“can i at least wait inside?” Airy asks, messing with his hands. “Yeah sure why not.”

“WHY ARE YOU INVITING STRANGERS INTO OUR HOUSE??” Liam yells. “Because an entity would get him if we just let him stay outside?” Texty interjects.

 

“WHAT.” all three of them say in unison.

“Nothing. Don’t mind me!” They chime before going back to watching family guy. Fucking FAMILY GUY—

 

Anyways. Airy enters the house or something and Bryce and Liam go to get dressed. 

 

“Okay let's go.” Bryce says, watching as Liam puts on his gayass mad scientist goggles.

“... wait, where are you going?” Texty asks, staring the trio down with their cold, dead, robot eyes. “Epic burger burnt down so we have to investigate it.”

“Oh. cool. Can i come?”

“Of course!” Liam smiles while getting its gayass mad scientist goggles on. Texty gives a thumbs up before walking besides Liam. 

“... are we going to get to the bottom of this now or?”

 

“Yeah sure whatever.”

 

And the four proceed to walk out of the apartment and get in Bryce's car.

“Hey guys can i play some music?” Texty asks, pulling their (totally not stolen) phone. “Sure, why not?” Bryce responds, focusing on the road ahead. The android connects their phone to the aux and plays some music.

 

It starts off fairly normal, a catchy beat that slowly fades in…

Until..

Clap. clap.

“TWO TRUCKS HAVING SEX.”

Two trucks proceeded to crash into each other, thus fulfilling the prophecy set by Lemon Demon himself.

 

“... WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST WITNESS.” Bryce yells, his eyes wide as hell.

“... okay, let’s not let Texty be in charge of the aux again.” Liam states bluntly.

Airy just. Stares at the car crash, unsure of what to say. Or do. Or think.

For some odd reason, it feels familiar.

“I did NOT know it was going to do that. What the hell.” Texty says, immediately turning the song off. Suddenly, the cars disappear with the song.

Maybe the two trucks were the friends we made along the way…

 

Everyone sits in silence before Bryce starts driving again. It’s a quiet drive to the (now burnt) epic burger. They’re all in shock from what just happened.

 

[7:00 AM: SOMEWHERE, USA.]

They’re currently questioning people who live near epic burger™ to see if they remember anything.

 

“I didn’t see anything.” - Owen [Unknown last name.]

“ I was sleeping.” - Charlotte S.

“I dunno. I saw some guy in a black hoodie with a gas can last night? Didn’t see if he was the guy though.” - Whippy C.

“Yeah, same here.” - Subway S.

“I saw the truck explode if that helps? But I didn’t see the fire actually start. ” - Circle WAM.

“I heard it, but I didn’t see it.” - Parker R. 

The statements didn’t help at all. It gave a frame of reference but they didn’t actually see anything.

Fuck.

 

“Well shit.” Texty says, looking at the notes they took during the investigation.

“That was pointless.” Bryce sighs, pinching his (metaphorical) nose bridge. 

Airy speaks up, “you guys forgot to investigate epic burger™. that’s why we didn’t get anywhere.. idiots.”

Liam looks up, “oh. Right. We did.” 

 

And so, they set out to the wonderful place of the burnt down epic burger™

 

🧪🧩🧪

 

The ripoff mystery gang stops at the charred building. They’re FINALLY doing their main goal oh my god.

The fire has already been put out. Including the truck.

 

“Spread out gang😈” Texty says with a mischievous grin on their face.

“Never say that again, please. ” Bryce sighs. He’s clearly done with all of this. 

“. . . Okay. loser.” they respond, flipping Bryce off.

“don’t start a fight in the parking lot.” Airy says while facepalming.

“I won’t.”

 

Liam’s already looking around, completely ignoring the people around it. Thank god.

He picks up a box of conveniently unburnt matches before adjusting his goggles to be on his face. “Hey, Bryce?”

 

“Yeah?” Bryce calls back, also looking around. He kicks a rock with his foot.

“Aren’t these the matches that we have at home?” 

He walks up beside it, staring down at the matches. “Aha. nooo.. Totally not.”

 

“Wait! Let me see!” Texty calls out before rushing over to the two. They study the box before speaking up again, “yeah. Those are our matches.”

 

“So that means… it’s one of us.” Liam says, his eyes widening.

“No??? That just means it’s someone who uses the same brand of matches.” Bryce reasons.

“... uh huh. Okay, but why does it say ‘bryce’s matches’ on it?” Texty says, holding the matches in their hand.

“WHAT. NO IT DOESN’T'?”

 

Texty shows the box. The matches do, in fact, say “bryce’s matches.”

Bryce was the man behind the fire all along.

 

“...” Airy just suddenly appears beside the trio. “YOU WERE THE ONE WHO EXPLODED MY TRUCK???” 

“WAIT! NO I DIDN’T IT’S A MISTAKE—”

 

There's a gunshot.

The taller man collapses onto the ground, blood pooling out of the wound. The scent of iron mixes with the already putrid smell of the burnt building.

Airy just stares, watching as the light fades from Bryce's eyes. There's nothing more to be said. There is no screaming and no alarms. There will be no funeral either.

The killer just casually walks away, as if Bryce's life didn't matter. 

 

Liam stares over the body of his deceased (boy)friend. He doesn't feel anything.

It'll all just go back to normal tomorrow anyways. What's the point in caring?

Texty lightly tugs on his arm, "Hey. We should— We should go.."

Liam mutters a small 'alright,' and walks over to Bryce’s car. He hesitates before getting in. Texty’s the driver, somehow. 

 

.... Tomorrow is another day. Right?

Chapter 3: breaking bad reference

Summary:

liam and airy cook?!?!

Notes:

wow... i'm working on something other than oblivion for once?!? shocker.
anyways, this is a stupid chapter i wrote bc i thought it would be funny

i think airy and liam are just funny as frenemies n there's a lot of untapped comedic potential. however this fic is intentionally ooc so it's not really in-line with how they'd actually act.
i wrote this at 5 am while slightly sleep deprived and listening to a kwite video in the background
enjoy ig

Chapter Text

[2:30 PM, SOMEWHERE, USA.]

 

Liam knocks on Airy’s front door. To be honest, he assumed that the guy was homeless but that’s another story for another day.

For some odd reason, Airy asked it to bring baking soda. Why? I have no idea bro i’m here with you.

Airy answers the door, “you got the supplies?” he asks, looking at liam with a suspicious look on his face. “Uhm? Yes?”

 

“ok. good.” he says, gesturing to Liam to come in. “Okay, what are we baking?” Liam asks, setting the baking soda down on the table. 

“we’re… not baking.” airy responds while pulling out the stuff.

 

“Then what are we doing?” liam asks, looking at airy with his big ole eyes. 

“we’re cooking.”

“... What are we cooking?”

Airy just gestures to the bigass bag on the table.

 

Liam’s jaw drops in shock, “YOU BROUGHT ME HERE TO COOK CRACK??”

“i mean.. yeah. why else would i need baking soda?”

“I THOUGHT WE WERE BAKING??? IT’S IN THE FUCKING ITEM NAME. BAKING SODA. ”

 

“oh. anyways. i have bills to pay and you’re… you. ”

Liam sighs in response, “am i at least getting a cut of the money?”

“yeah. i’ll give you some.”

 

Yeah they cook lol. I’m not describing this i don’t want to.

You get the idea.

 

A few days later, liam gets like 20k in the mail. He proceeds to buy a new microwave so his roommates stop bitching at him.

“Where did you get the money for that?” Bryce asks. “You don’t want to know.” Liam says.

 

Airy gets arrested because he was caught. Oh and he was charged for 80 accounts of vehicular manslaugter throughout the united states AND canada.

The  end.

Chapter 4: four.

Summary:

...

Chapter Text

“Bryce?” Texty says, peeking behind the door frame. There’s a concerned look on their screen.

“Yeah?” Bryce answers, looking up from his laptop. He stops typing for a minute.

“Liam’s… acting weird.” Texty says, their hands gripping onto the wooden frame.

 

“What’s he doing?”

 

“He’s muttering something about different timelines and universes. I think you need to check on him. He won’t listen to me!” they answer.

Bryce sighs and gets up from his bed before walking into Liam's room.

 

“Liam, what are you doing? Texty came to get me to check on you.”

“Oh!” Liam looks up from the desk; the entire room is covered with notes and pieces of paper.  “I think I've discovered a way to stop this! All of this!” he yells, a hauntingly manic look in his eyes.

He’s obviously disheveled and tired. 

“All of what?” Bryce asks while narrowing his eyes.

 

“The time loop.” He bluntly responds.

“The what.”

“Wait… you don’t.. Remember? All of those times you died? All the times Amelia died?” Liam's voice saddens, looking at Bryce with fear in his eyes.

“You’re crazy, Liam. Do you have any idea what you’re saying?!”

 

“No.. no this can’t be.” 

“God, Liam. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with you or your insane theories but I don’t want anything to do with them.”

 

“... Fuck.” Liam mumbles, looking at the date on the calendar. It’s getting close—

“Bryce. Whatever happens tomorrow, please trust me on this. I’m not fucking crazy.”

 

“You are, Liam. You’re crazy.”

 

“I’m not crazy!” Liam yells, “I know that he has something to do with it and I'm going to prove it! You’ll see!”

 

Bryce walks out of the room, brushing past Texty.

 

Liam sighs, gripping at his hair. 

Why does nobody remember?