Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Tucker was walking before he realised it. 

Tucker froze. Shit. It happened again. He knew where he was walking and swore before turning on his heels and headed to the kitchen.

Tucker swung open the freezer and grabbed and ice pack and placed it on his head for the headache-

You are more than aware that will not help-

I'm sorry-

STOP IGNORING US-

Tucker's breath hitched as the pain got worse.

Since that fight on Hargrove's ship when he worr the Meta's armour... he's been... having some... unexpected occurrences. Occurrences that's been happening more and more.

You will listen to us, Lavernius Tucker.

Tucker let out a shuddering gasped as he dropped his ice pack and braced his hands on the kitchen counter.

He's fine. It's just... nightmares that won't go away.

He's fine.

This process will be far less painful for you if you complied.

Tucker bit his lip. He can handle this. He's not going crazy-

You wish you were Shizno-

He's not crazy!

Not like Wash who's stuck in a hospital hallucinating Doc. Not like- 

Not like-

Not like Agent Maine? Or well, you would of just known him as the Meta.

Tucker gritted his teeth.

He's going to go the bed and not wake up in the armoury where the Meta armour is. He's going to make pancakes for Caboose. He's going to fuck with the Reds. He's going to be okay.

If you had the armour on we could talk from outside your head. It would be proof that we are real, would it not?

Tucker's hand shook as he put the ice pack back in the freezer.

He leaned on the bench as he tried to get his thoughts in order. He'll go to sleep and not wake up-

Would you prefer the alternative that you woke up with Michael J Caboose dead by your hands?-

"Shut the fuck up!" Tucker hissed.

You should of threatened Caboose or even his child sooner Sigma-

"All of you shut the fuck up!" 

Tucker dropped down to the ground and held his skull tightly in his hands.

There we go. Hello, Tucker.

"...Just leave me alone." Tucker whispered as he drew his knees to his chest.

I'm afraid we can't do that. We need you Tucker.

We really do!

Unfortunately.

"Stop it. Just go and haunt that fucking armour forever until you go rampant or something. Just leave me out of it." Tucker whispered shakily.

I'm afraid not. We aren't resigned to such a fate.

"Church did though. He- He did this save us. He fragmented himself to power thar armour. So just stay there and leave me alone and leave my family alone." 

...I can't remember.

We see that in your memories, however we lack that. Epsilon took that with him when he deconstructed.

"Can't you just honour his dying memory or some shit then?" Tucker said as he pulled himself off the floor and leaned heavily on the counter.

You didn't get to say goodbye. I hate goodbyes, but you should of gotten the chance.

Theta-

You two were best friends! You trusted each other. I...

None of us got to say goodbye. It hurts, doesn't it?

Tucker could feel his thoughts being tugged forcefully to that train of thought. 

"...Fuck you." Tucker said as his voice broke. 

He harshly rubbed at the tears.

But what if you could have... Church back?

Another tug.

Tucker froze.

"What?"

If we become whole, you could have your best friend back?

A harder tug. One that makes Tucker start to walk before he realises it. But he doesn't stop.

"How? Aren't you guys all that's left?" Tucker asked, hesitate to believe.

We do not remember, but we know otherwise.

Epsilon had become like the Alpha, therefore a new Epsilon must exist.

"The memories? So... somewhere-"

Tucker paused as he held the Meta helmet in his hands. He didn't even remember putting on the the rest of the armour.

What is the matter?

Something was the matter, right?

It's like his thoughts have moved and sifted apart he couldn't find where they were now.

He saw his reflection in his helmet before glancing at his cool alien sword at his waist.

"...Leave Junior and Caboose out of this." Tucker struggled to say. Struggled to think.

Of course.

Are you having problems with thinking Tucker? Would you like assistance?

Tucker slowly put on the helmet as his thoughts were loud with buzzing and static. He couldn't think.

"Uh... sure."

Tucker closed his eyes tightly from the rush of pain.

And the Meta opened them. 

Chapter Text

Tucker leaned against the wall and wretched as nothing came out, his shaky fingers scrabbling to try and take off the helmet.

"And what do you think you're doing?" Sigma said as his small form appeared right in front of his face.

Tucker jumped and hit his head against the wall.

"Fuck!" Tucker hissed.

He hasn't been able to think clearly for- for-

"1 month, 21 days, 14 hours, 3 minutes-"

"Shut up Delta!" Tucker shouted at the green figure.

He never even met the fragments before but now their names are burned and branded onto his mind. 

Tucker placed a hand of his chest as he tried to ground himself and keep himself here.

For the past 1 month, 21 days- he's been fighting to even think and forced to do whatever Sigma ordered and-

"Who said you get a break now?" Sigma sneered as he leaned forward.

Tucker felt panic rise in his throat as he clenched his fists.

"You're not even here Sigma! You can't- You can't make me do- You can't!" Tucker said as his hands shook.

Sigma's been making him go on his wild goose chase for the new Epsilon and making him MURDER people. Not even just soldiers. Civilians too!

"Feeling angry?" Omega asked darkly.

"All of you just leave me alone!" Tucker yelled as tried to swat the AI holographic projections away.

"Wow you got us." Gamma said sarcastically.

Tucker growled at them as was about to take of the helmet.

"Tucker wait!" Theta cried out.

Tucker paused. He knew Theta wasn't really a kid, but still- it made him think of kids. Of Junior.

Sigma took that moment of hesitation and immediately dug his claws into Tucker's mind. Tucker choked out a cry as he collapsed onto his knees and held his skull. 

"Enough. You won't be coming back so easily again. It would be better for all of us if you just gave up and followed orders." Sigma sneered.

Tucker could feel his very thoughts- his sense of himself- being burnt away-

The Meta let go of their head and stood at attention, waiting for orders.

"There we go. Now, let's go to that UNSC base."

The Meta grinned.

Chapter Text

Tucker on instinct rolled and ducks behind a crate as bullets fly past. Once behind cover he groans and placed a hand on his helmet.

"You really have great timing." Gamma snarked.

Tucker gritted his teeth.

Right. He- they- The Meta was currently fighting soldiers at an outpost in the middle of nowhere- an outpost that was closest UNSC facility near Chorus-

Tucker hissed and he gripped his helmet tighter.

"Enough. Stop this Lavernius Tucker. We'll all die-"

"Why don't you just shut up Sigma?!" Tucker shouted.

"Everyone stop this please!" Theta wailed.

"Theta is correct. We will die if we do not cooperate and eliminate the enemy soldiers." Delta reasoned.

"I don't need your help!" Tucker shouted.

Tucker didn't like killing but he had done a lot because A) He's a soldier and B) He really doesn't want to die.

Tucker registered the assault rifle he was holding that they- The Meta took from the corpse of a soldier earlier. On his hip was his cool alien sword.

Suddenly the bullets stopped.

"Damn it I'm low on bullets, Johannes-"

"Jones-"

"Bring the extra ammunition now."

"Sir, we don't have any. We haven't gotten extra supplies in years."

"What?!"

"We're on an outpost in bum-fuck nowhere! I'm half sure that only Mickey's ex remembers that we're here."

"Not cool dude!-"

"Attack now!" Omega growled.

Tucker flinched before he got his baring and sprinted to a crate stack that had better cover. He shot at the soldiers as he bolted.

Once Tucker peaked from the cover and-

"There are 5 soldiers. The assumed CO has a bullet in his femur from our attack a few minutes ago-"

"Delta stop trying to help me!" Tucker hissed.

Tucker aimed and shot at the CO anyways since Delta unneededly pointed out that his leg was injured.

The quintet jumped and tried to get out of the way- but the CO couldn't dodge fast enough due to the leg. He got several rounds into his chest before he collapsed.

"NO!" One of the soldiers cried out.

Tucker ducked back into cover as there was a new barrages of bullets trying to kill him.

"Fuck! Mickey why aren't coms working?! We need help!" Jones shouted in a panic.

"I dunno! This guy probably hacked into our system and shut them down!" She shrieked.

Oh yeah. Tucker remembers doing that- he remembers The Meta doing that. 

"Cease Tucker and give us control." Sigma demanded.

Tucker winced in pain as he dropped his gun and clenched his helmet. He almost ripped it off to hold his head when suddenly one of the soldiers ran at his with a knife.

"Rhys!" Mickey cried out.

Rhys tackled Tucker and tried to shiv him. Tucker grabbed his wrist and the two started to tumble and roll as they tried to gain the advantage.

"Tucker use your sword." Omega said.

Tucker could suddenly see the calculations and bedt angle to it. Tucker did it without thinking. He stabbed Rhys's just below his left ribcage at an upwards angle before he knew it.

"Fuck!" Tucksr shouted as he scrambled off and hastily reached for the assault rifle to shoot the three approaching soldiers.

"You bastard!" Jones shouted.

Tucker immediately bolted and slid under a Warthog (why is there a Warthog on a space station?) and behind a shelf.

"Tucker-"

"Just leave me alone!" Tucker whispered venomously.

Suddenly Delta and Theta appeared.

"Tucker, I highly suggest you allow us to help. If you keep fighting lime this then you well likely perish." Delta said.

"I... I really am sorry. For what we're making you do. But if you die here then- Junior would never get to say goodbye to you." Theta pleaded.

Tucker's heart clenched but he glared at the pair.

"You think I don't know that you lot 'helping' me would just make it easier for us to become the Meta?! I-"

Suddenly the twins, Eta and Iota, showed Tucker the best possible to escape the Warthog exploding.

"Son of a bitch!" Tucker shouted as he got back up and realised that he had no cover anymore.

Jones had a rocket launcher while Mickey and the other guy had assault rifles.

"End of the line mate." Jones said darkly.

"You will only have reflexes to escape this unharmed by being The Meta. There is no choice."

Tucker hissed in pain. He couldn't fight back anymore.

"Run!" Tucker shouted.

The armour went from aqua to black and orange.