Chapter 1: Surprise Visitor, Bad News and a Kiss of Hope
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On March 3. 1969 the United States Navy established an elite school for the top one percent of its pilots. Its purpose was to teach the lost art of aerial combat and to ensure that the handful of men and women who graduated were the best fighter pilots in the world.
They succeeded.
Today, the Navy calls it: Fighter Weapons School. The flyers call it:
TOP GUN
It was a sunny spring day, and if it was one thing Evan Buckley did not expect was walking out of the locker room after showering – a sick kid had thrown up at him on their last call – to see his current captain talking to his former commanding officer. “Commander Phillips.” Buck snapped into attention as soon as he spotted the older man, making his present clear.
“Chief special warfare operator Buckley.” He greeted back, answering the salute before dropping his hand down. Buck moved to parade rest, more out of habit and respect than anything else. “Stand down, Buckley. I’m not your CO, and I haven’t been for a couple of years.”
“That may be the truth, but you are still my superior, Sir.” Only moving his eyes, Buck glanced over at the rest of his crew. Bobby was visibly sad; Eddie was confused, and all the others were shocked.
Bobby knew about his time in the service and the fact that he was still in the reserve due to the paperwork he had to submit to the department and the time off he needed for his regular training. Eddie clocked he was ex-military during the call involving a man with a live grenade in his leg and knew the truth about his tattoo. They hadn’t talked about his service, or Eddie’s. They only had an extremely short and un-detailed chat where they both promised not to talk about each other’s time on active duty unless they brought it up themself. The other members on his team though – Hen, Chimney, Ravi, John and Stover – didn’t know anything about Buck’s military career, believing he dropped out during the initial training.
The commander stepped closer to Buck. “Before you begin, both me and McGarrett have tried to stop this, or at last figure out why, but no one is willing to give us anything. This is not only over our paygrade, contacts and influence but over our clarence level as well, coming directly from Iceman himself.” As he looked at the younger man in front of him, Phillips pulled up an envelope. An all too familiar envelope for two of the people in the fire station. Deployment orders.
Buck stared at it as he heard Eddie swore in Spanish. Buck reached for it, before he stopped, his hand halfway to the letter. “Wait. From Iceman, as in Admiral Kazansky, the commander of the Pacific Fleet?!”
“How does he even know who Buck is?” Eddie asked, looking at the commander.
“I don’t know.” Phillips answered and gave Eddie a onceover before turning back to Buck. “All we were able to find out is that it’s three weeks of training, single mission, highly classified, dangerous , and that the training starts Monday morning o-800, at SAN North Island.”
“North Island?!” Buck and Eddie both shouted. Eddie shook his head and started pacing while Buck reached for the envelope, ripping it open and skimming the letter for the location and time.
“Ifreann. Why the fuck am I sent back to Top Gun? No one has ever gone to Top Gun twice!” [Hell] Eddie stopped dead in his step. “What?? You were – are – a navy SEAL. Why were you attending Top Gun in the first place? What can you do for them?”
“What even is Top Gun or this North Island?” Hen asked, looking back and forth between them, holding a hand over Chimney's mount, hindering him from saying something stupid or inappropriate.
“We couldn’t find an answer. If we had, you would know. Steve didn’t have time to fly to the mainland, so I thought the last thing I could do was to come up and inform you personally. This isn’t news you deserve to get in the mail.” Commander Phillips answered Buck's previous question, ignoring Hen and side-eying Eddie for a moment. Buck nodded, turning toward his team, but mostly Bobby.
“I will tell you the little I can share later, but right now I have some preparations I need to get to. I’m going to come by sometime tomorrow with all the proper paperwork, but I’m going to need the rest of this week and at least the next four off.” He turned towards his former officer. “What is the rating?”
Eddie, who had returned to pacing, tilted his head as if it would help him hear the answer better. “If I have to guess, Indigo.” Buck closed his eyes; he took a few collecting breaths as Eddie mumbled incoherent in Spanish to himself.
“Indigo is that a bad thing or …” Ravi’s question died out as everyone turned their attention toward him.
“It’s a significant chance of success, but…,” Eddie didn’t finish the answer, turning away to hide the tears that were starting to fill his eyes.
“Hey, HEY!” Buck moved close to Eddie. “Remember all the shit I have been through since we meet. This is just another bump in the road. I’m going to do everything I can to make sure I come back. Back to you and Chris. I pinky swear.” He held up his pinky looking at Eddie.
Instead of answering, Eddie wrapped his pinky around Bucks and pulled the other man into a kiss. It’s the first time Eddie actually noticed that Buck was slightly taller than him, only by half an inch or something. Not enough to normally notice, but he had to slightly tilt his head as they were kissing.
Buck let out a surprised sound against Eddie's lips, but then he reciprocated it, laying his hands around Eddie's hips and held him as close as possible. Neither of them deepened the kiss, they just stood there together for a moment before separation – foreheads touching – holding each other.
“I can’t lose you.” Eddie whispered, even if the rest of them could hear them just fine with how qu- silent it was. Tears ran freely down his face.
“When – not if, when – I return you better take me on the best first date ever,” Buck raised a playful eyebrow, but the mood stayed heavy. “And hopefully my last first date.”
Eddie closed the miniature distance between them and peaked Bucks lips. “Te amo.” [I love you]
The station's alarm started blaring disturbing the moment.
“I’m taking the kids – including May – on Saturday, you can have a goodbye gathering on Sunday!” Buck yelled as the others ran and grabbed their gear.
“You are going to stay at mine tomorrow!” Eddie yelled, spearing a second to kiss Buck on the cheek right before he jumped into the ladder truck, barely seconds before it pulled out of the station, closely followed by the ambulance. Hen held down the air horn as a greeting and Chimney gave him a sad wave as they drove away.
“How are you holding up?” Commander Phillips asked Buck as soon as the two vehicles were out of sight. “He loves me. He actually loves me, and I have to leave.” It wasn’t exactly an answer, but it was the only thought Buck was able to form at that moment.
“Yes, he does. Let me take you home, you shouldn’t drive right now. Pluss I can help you with all the paperwork and preparations you need to make.”
“Thank you.”
Chapter 2: Ready made family and St. Christopher
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Buck used the rest of the day and the next doing the necessary preparations before his deployment including, but not limited to; sorting out the various paperwork needed at LAFD, updating his will, cleaning up his apartment properly, taking numerous phone calls, sorting through his personally papers, and writing goodbye letters to everyone in case he didn’t make it.
Before Buck knew it, he was heading towards the Diaz home for dinner and movie night.
Eddie's car wasn’t in the driveway meaning he probably was held up at abuelas while picking up Chris. Buck parked in his usual spot – leaving room for Eddie's car closer to the entrance – and picked up his bag from the backseat before entering the house, casually throwing his keys in the bowl on the commode and heading into the living room.
Buck froze for a moment as he spotted the coffee table. It was packed to the brim of papers, colors and other art supplies. Dropping his bag by the wall, Buck walked over to the table, looking at the items scattered around.
It was a half-made poster with different star-constellations, probably Christophers latest school project. Spotting a mistake, Buck grabbed a stack of post it notes – the orange ones Eddie seemed to prefer – and noted down the correction and stuck it to the board. As he didn’t have anything better to do, Buck cleaned the table, moved everything to its rightful place before leaving the partly used pages on a stack on the dinner table.
Buck had turned to the few dishes laying around, stocking the dishwasher and cleaning the kitchen when he heard the sound of Eddie's car pulling into the driveway.
Drying his hands after putting the fruit bowl he was cleaning back in place, Buck made it to the entrance as the door was opened. Christopher beamed up at him. “Bucky!”
Buck crouched down, skillfully bracing himself as Christoffer hugged him at full force. “How was school?”
“It was boring, but that isn’t important.” Something was off with the kid and Buck didn’t like it. He pulled at Chris’ shoulders moving him far enough that he could see the kids face.
“I told him you were being called back to the navy; he just knew something was wrong the moment I stepped into Abuelas house.” Eddie explained before Buck could ask what was wrong. “I, eh, we were supposed to do this on Sunday before you left, but if I don’t do it now, I’m not sure I will be able to not break down long enough to do this.”
Eddie gently grabbed Bucks hand and dragged him into the living room, pushing him down to the couch before sitting down next to him, intertwining their hands. Chris – who had followed behind them – sat down on the edge of the coffee table, wanting to be as close by as he could, but still giving his dads the space they needed.
“I thought of this since you left yesterday, and Chris immediately agreed when I asked him,” Eddie began, taking some deep breaths trying to calm himself down a little. “I want you to wear my St. Christopher medallion.”
“What?” Buck was clearly shocked. “Eddie, you can’t do that. Shannon gave it to you when Chris was born, to make sure you had a reminder of why you had to make it home. You – I have never seen you without it. You can’t give it to me, I can’t accept it.”
“Evan,” Chris startled Buck. “It kept dad safe, made him find his way back to me. Let it be your compass now.”
Buck didn’t hide his tears as he looked at the kid with big eyes. Eddie moved his hands to cup Buck’s face, using his thumb to remove the tears and pressing their foreheads together.
“Most days I’m not sure if God does exist or not, but the legend of St. Christopher is much more than a story. It’s hope. Hope that someone will carry you to safety. And that you could make it through a difficult journey. He is the saint of archers, bachelors, boatmen, soldiers, bookbinders, epilepsy, floods, fruit dealers, gardens, a holy death, mariners, motorists, drivers, sailors, storms, surfers and against lightning and pestilent. He is the patron saint of travelers. If for nothing else, take it and wear it for me and Christopher.”
Eddie moved away from Buck – only barely – giving himself space to take off the medallion around his neck. With shaking hands did he lift it slowly over Bucks head and lower it. Eddie leaned forward planting a kiss on Buck’s birthmark as it fell down around Buck's neck.
“Let it guard my heart Evan.”
Chris reached forwards and pressed the medallion gently into Bucks chest. “Keep him safe.”
“Oh. The two of you are the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I will do absolutely everything to stay alive. As long as my heart's still beating I will try everything and fight to return to you.” It was an emotional softness in Buck's voice neither of the Diazes had heard before.
Chris lunged forwards, pulling Buck into a hug, Eddie moved to support them both. They stayed there together for a long time, clinging to each other and crying. Eventually falling asleep.
Chapter 3: Callsigns, the Buckley Special and Love
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Carla found them the next morning when she was going to pick up Chris for school. She snapped a picture of them wrapped up in each other and fast asleep. She sent it in the ‘118 with family’ chat before she stepped closer gently speaking.
“Christopher, you have to wake up, or you’re going to be late for school.”
“No, do’n wanna lea’ Bu’” the kid mumbled and snuggled closer to the two adults.
“As much as we all are going to miss Buck, he is only going to be gone for a few weeks, and school is important. I may have let you stay home if it was a normal Friday, but you have that important math test today, remember.” Eddie told his son as he tried to separate them from Bucks octopus’ arms.
“I hate math,” Buck mumbled, but did eventually loosen his grip on the Diaz boys.
“That’s because you are so bad at it,” Carla mussed, holding up Chris’s crutches. She turned the kid toward his bedroom before walking into the kitchen.
“I will pick him up from school, take him to his therapist and bring him home. Text me if we should pick up food on our way back. It’s the last I can do for you.”
“Thank you, Carla,” Buck shouted before grabbing Eddie and pulling him down on top of himself. “I promise we will be up soon. I just want to hold you a little more. Who knows when I can do it next time.”
“Evan,” Eddie said sorrowfully. “I love you. I’m not saying it because you are being called back into action, I’m saying it because it’s how I have felt for a long time, but I have been too afraid to ruin what we already have. And now … now it doesn’t matter, because you may never return. I just … I need you to know I love you.”
“Edmundo Diaz, you have had my heart since we pulled that grenade out of Charlie’s leg. I haven’t had the courage to tell you because all my relationships have ended badly and you – and Chris – are too important to me to lose. I can’t repeat your exact words. As much as I want to, I have a bigger issue with them than Maddie has, just know that the two of you are everything to me.”
Eddie moved up on his elbows, locking his eyes in Bucks blue. “I don’t care if you never say you love me or if you tell me every day. Knowing you feel the same is enough. You will never get rid of me now. It’s us – together – as long as we are alive.”
Buck moved upwards kissing Eddie. It was more intense than their previous, leaving them breathless by the time Chris and Carla returned to the living room.
“We are off to school, remember to eat and don’t do something stupid,” Carla gave them both a stern look as Chris hugged them, using way longer than he normally did.
“Bye dad, bye Buck, love you both.” Buck got another shorter hug before Chris followed Carla out.
“So, what do you think about a shower and then I take you out to the small breakfast restaurant you and Maddie adore?” Eddie asked as soon as they heard the entrance door close.
“Though I said you should take me on our first date when I return? I didn’t realize I already went and returned.” Buck grinned up at Eddie but took the extended hand, pulling himself up.
They showered and cleaned up the house a little before heading out, Buck's hair still damp. Buck and Eddie didn’t talk during the drive, simply enjoying the other's company, hand entangled on the gear lever. Soft music in the background.
As they entered the restaurant they were greeted by a teenager with a big smile. “Buck! And you must be Eddie. Welcome. Do you want the Buckley special?”
“Buckley special? I didn’t know you and Maddie went here that often.” Eddie asked as he looked around the restaurant. He had only been there twice before, once with Buck and Chris and once with Maddie.
“About every other week, we just ask for a combination of two existing items, so the owner decided to add it to the menu after like the fifth time I think.”
“We will take two Buckley Specials, and for the record yes, I am Eddie. Eddie Diaz.”
“Nice to meet you, I am Veronica, my grandma and aunt own this place. Your food will be with you shortly.” As the teenager disappeared into the kitchen Buck and Eddie found a table in a secure corner, away from the other customers.
After sitting down Buck gave Eddie a look that clearly said ‘out with it’. “You don’t have to worry about ruining the mood or bringing up bad memories or whatever else you are worried about.”
Eddie had to take some time collecting his thoughts before he could answer. “I know you are a navy SEAL, that you are an underwater explosion expert, but that’s about it. I understand that you can’t or won’t talk about it, I just … I want to know that you are going to stay as safe as possible out there and the whole thing with being sent to Top Gun doesn’t make any sense for me.”
“After Maddie left and it was time for me to begin high school our parents had had enough of me, so they sent me to Rhode Island Military Academy.” Buck shook his head. Deciding he should start from the beginning of his career.
“I hated it at first, but halfway into freshman year, when my classmates went home for Christmas break, I stayed on campus. I realized that these people actually saw me as I was, as someone that had had a hard childhood and didn’t know how to trust or interact with people.”
Eddie made a sound deep in his throat but didn’t say anything, so Buck continued. “The whole staff took me – and four other kids left on campus – and celebrated the holiday with us. I was given a book that changed my life. ‘Self-identity and withstanding the storm around you’ by Lance Sweet, some FBI psychology, anyway, it totally changed my life. I started enjoying my stay at the academy. I have always been better at the physical aspect of things and when I got my head in the game I started exceeding. In sophomore year recruiters started noticing me and my teachers put me on an accelerated course. I graduated three weeks after turning seventeen, with offers from all over the armed forces, but I wanted a challenge, so I ended up choosing the navy SEAL. My parents signed the paperwork without even looking at it, happy I was not their responsibility anymore.”
“And you mentioned that you were moved to the reserves shortly before you joined the fire-academy, so you clearly have expertise, you don’t survive ten years as a SEAL without some knowledge.”
Before Buck was able to answer, Veronica turned up to their table. “Here you go, boys, two Buckley Specials.” She sat down two plates in front of them filled to the brim with waffles, omelet, sausages, French fries and fried eggs. She was gone with a smile and an ‘Enjoy the food’.
“So, how did you end up attending Top Gun?” Eddie asked before digging into the food in front of him. Neither of them had eaten in over 12 hours, so they were both hungry.
“That is classified information,” Buck began around a mouthful off food, “but it may or may not include me bugging someone into letting me do something I wasn’t allowed to, but instead of yelling at me the officer witnessing it decided I should have proper training and gave me an extended crash course and sending me to something I didn’t have the admission requirements for.”
“I never would have combined this but it is pretty good.” Eddie commented already cleared a quarter of his plate. “It’s not like you can tell me what missions you pulled, or where you were deployed, but could you give me a hint?”
Buck stopped eating, picking at his food and deliberately not looking at Eddie. “My team nicknamed me Bambi,” Eddie snorted, “But my actual callsign, you have probably heard some stories about it. What I actually did was worse than the rumors moving among US military personnel.”
Eddie sat down his utensils and intertwined his and Bucks hands. “Whatever it is, I can take it. It wouldn’t change anything; you still have me. I was Akita, if that helps you.” Buck's head snapped up, his eyes met Eddie's brown ones, eyebrows scrunched together. “You are Akita?”
“Yes, yes I am. And I promise I won’t tell anyone what your callsign indicates.”
Buck looked down, closing his eyes. “My callsign is America, as in Captain America.” Eddie swore in Spanish. “Because not only do you look the part, but you pulled a Captain America move, stumbling across and stopping a human trafficking ring during an exercise mission before your first deployment. Witch really, is one of the minor heroics act you have pulled. I don’t know if I should be reviled that you are one of the best soldiers this country has ever had or horrified at everything you have pulled during your service.”
“Both, neither, look, I did what I had to do to save lives. It’s the same as we do at work running into fires, what most of our family and friends are doing. Making sure strangers can make it home. In some ways it’s exactly like you did, deployed for the army.” Buck looked pleading at Eddie. “As much as I wish I could put myself first and not risk my life saving someone, I can’t. I couldn’t live down the aftermath.”
Eddie squeezed his hand. “I know, and I love you regardless. I don’t want you to change, but I’m not sure how I would survive if you don’t return.”
“Eddie,” Buck was fighting back tears, not wanting to cry in one of his favorite public places. “I don’t want it to be a reality, but if I don’t, you have a lot of people around you that you can lean on, and Christopher is going to be needing you. He will be devastated if he loses one of us, he can’t lose us both.”
Eddie untangled one of his hands and wiped a stray tear on Bucks face away. “I will stay strong for Christopher, but you have to do everything you can to make it back to us – alive. Everything else can be figured out later.”
“I don’t even know what the mission is, but I promise I will fight to return to you and Chris, I will however also do my absolute best to make sure everyone else survives the mission and can come home to their families as well.”
“And that I will have to live with.” Eddie sent Buck a reassuring smile before returning to his now lukewarm food. “Can we turn to a happier conversion? I can’t drown in negativity before you have even left.”
Buck gave him a onceover before nodding twice. “Did you know that Island Night Lizard – a species native to a few islands on the coast of southern California – was categorized as endangered back in 1977 but that it now is over 21 million of them and they are no longer endangered?”
The conversation flowed freely between the two men after that, constantly jumping subjects.
Afterwards, when the food was eaten, they headed back to the Diaz home.
Chapter 4: Superheros, Waffle and an Engangement?
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By the time Carla and Christopher returned with pizza Buck had finished the last errands and preparations he had to make and was sitting comfortably at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee looking at Eddie trying to clean up his failed attempt at making dinner.
“Dad, Bucky!” Christopher ran into the kitchen. “Mr. Morgan gave us back our tests right before school ended. I got a B+!”
“That’s amazing Superman!” Buck beamed at Chris and pulled him into a warm hug. Eddie sniffled behind them before joining the hug. “My two superheroes.”
Chris wiggled out of the embracement. “ Two superheroes ? What superhero is Buck? The Winter Soldier?”
Buck burst out laughing, none of them noticing Carla leaving the pizza on the table and slipping away, leaving the little family alone.
“I should be, shouldn’t I?”
“I don’t know, you definitely make a better Captain America.” Eddie leaned in and kissed Buck.
“Gross,” Chris wrinkled his nose, making Buck and Eddie laugh.
“But if I am Superman and Bucky are Captain America, shouldn’t dad also be a superhero? So that the whole family could match,” Chris questioned when the two adults had quit.
“That’s a really great point, what superhero?” Buck's voice wavered with emotions and his eyes were teary from Chris' comment.
“Can I be a cool superhero like Spiderman or Iron Man?” Eddie asked, drawing his son’s attention.
“NO! It has to make sense. I am Superman because I am invincible, and Buck is Captain America because he fights for everyone who deserves a chance.”
“I know,” Buck snapped his hand, “The one who is pararescue and flies down and saves people, just like Eddie does at work.”
Chris clearly thought about it for a moment or two. “Okay, yes, dad can be Falcon. He’s always the one who comes and saves us.” With a nod he turned towards the pizza. “Can we eat now? I am hungry.”
“Why don’t you go and select a movie, and me and Falcon will get food and drinks ready?” Buck decided.
Chris moved to the living room and Eddie opened the refrigerator grabbing their preferred drinks as Buck got the cutlery. Together they were able to balance everything, dumping the food un-ceremonially on the coffee table. Chris had already pulled up Matilda, Buck's absolute favorite move growing up. It also was one of extremely few movies he actually had watched growing up.
The little family settled down on the couch – Buck firmly between the Diaz boys – and enjoyed the evening together.
One move turned to two, two to three, and by the time the credits on the fourth movie rolled on the screen the pizza was long gone, and they were all fast asleep, tangled together, Christopher and Eddie firmly holding Buck.
***
The next morning, Buck woke up early and somehow was able to wriggle out of the hold the Diazes had on him and stand up. After a short stop at the bathroom, he went to the kitchen and mixed the special waffle batter he learned from one of his old teammates’ wife.
It was a family recipe and even if the Abrahamsen didn't keep it a secret didn’t mean he could walk around sharing it with just anyone. It was however noted down in the secret cookbook he had made of recipes he had picked up in life and enjoyed. The cookbook that Chris would get when he died. Buck had planned to give it to Chris when he was old enough and moving out from Eddie’s, but if things didn’t go his way, it seemed like Chris may get the book long before Buck intended to.
Buck was able to make breakfast before Eddie and Chris woke up. Which meant he got to wake them. He did it by grabbing Eddie’s phone and sending a short text message before he put the phone between the two sleeping figures on the couch. It got his intended response.
It took barely a few minutes before Eddie's phone started blowing up with texts and calls. Buck stood to the side and watched with an amused smile as Chris bolted up, getting out of the couch faster than Buck had ever seen him move before.
Eddie moved his hand, grabbed the phone and answered. He put it to his ear without looking, more asleep than awake. He was met with Abuelas Spanish yelling and Eddie tumbled over the edge of the couch in surprise, not able to register what was happening.
“Más despacio, abuela, me desperataste y no sé qué está pasando.” [Slow down grandma, you woke me up and I don’t know what is going on] Eddie said as he sat up, one hand rubbing his eyes. Buck couldn’t hear what the older woman was saying but he could guess.
“Come on buddy, breakfast is ready,” Buck gently showed Chris towards the kitchen.
Chris had just started his third plate as Eddie entered the kitchen.
“’You better be in LA in four weeks, it is either going to be a wedding or a funeral’ why the fuck would you send that in a group chat with most of my family?!?”
“Because it is true, and I figured you were going to need their support. Plus nothing wakes you up as good as someone yelling at you.” Buck answered with a little smile. Eddie glared at him.
“Are you getting married?” Chris asked with food in his mount. Both adults turned their entire attention toward the kid.
“Well, I for one definitely want to marry your dad, and I believe he wants to have the rest of forever with me as well,” Buck looked away from Chris seeing that Eddie was already looking at him with a lovesick smile.
“I definitely want the rest of forever with you. I want the whole package: marriage, kids, probably a dog at one point, the white picket fence, growing old together, everything – together with you.”
Buck leaned over the table and kissed his partner? boyfriend? Fiancé? The love of his life.
“If you getting married means there will be sooo much kissing, I’m going to make a max quota per day.” Chris' serious tone made Buck and Eddie break the kiss because they began laughing.
“The two of you are my everything, and I will always fight to come back to you,” Buck swore when the laughter died down.
“Love you too,” Eddie and Chris said at the same time.
Chapter 5: Secret Hiding Spot and the myth of Herculus
Notes:
The myth of Hercules is mostly taken from a TED-Ed video on youtube. It have great anemation, if you are intruged they you should find it, they have a whole playlist of videos on myths.
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By the time Buck and Chris were ready to leave the clock was past 11. Buck sent a short text to May, telling her to grab Harry, Denny and Nia and meet him at a gas station as he and Chris were stopping by the grocery store to get some snacks for the trip.
Buck and Chris made sure they had the favorite snacks to everyone attending, some actually healthy options and plenty of drinks before meeting May at the predetermined gas station. Buck brought a round of ice cream to the kids and listened to them tell him all about their week.
When the ice cream was gone, and the conversation died down Buck clapped his hands. “Come on everyone, get into the cars and I will take you to my favorite and completely secret place in all of Los Angeles.”
They all scrambled to the cars, Harry and Denny insisting on going with Buck, making May and Nia drive alone, following Buck's jeep.
It took about half an hour before they made it to a small, partly overgrown parking lot in front of a closed store. Buck parked and grabbed the food and drinks before locking his car, May following suit. She made sure none of the kids was missing anything.
“This is extremely important, when you come to this parking lot, I need you to turn off your location on your phones. We can’t have anyone following you to my secret spot can we, then it wouldn’t be a secret.”
May looked at him worrisome so Buck leaned in and whispered – making sure the younger kids was busy with their phones – “Athena knows the location and has been told to come and check it first if I or some of you go missing, plus there is cell recipient in the area so we can still get phone calls.”
May nodded and pulled up her phone, turning off the location before pocketing it. “Do you need help carrying everything?”
“No, just help me shepherd the kids.”
The track behind the store was hidden but fairly well traveled. It only took about fifteen minutes to make it to the base of a small hill. Instead of following the track further going around the base Buck turned toward the kids.
“This is the important part, if you don’t want anyone to follow you you can’t leave behind a track. I need you to jump from stone to stone for this part.”
They made it up the hill with some difficulty, but eventually they were all on the top. Moving only a couple feet through the bushes they made it to an open place with surprisingly much view of the city and a small three walled cabin.
“This is where I disappear to when the world becomes too much. Since I am leaving and can’t promise I will make it back I wanted to show you it, so that if I don’t make it back you can come here when you miss me the most and scream to the sky or cry your heart out or whatever you need. Just ask May to take you here, I don’t want you to go here completely alone if something happens, okay?” Buck looked at the kids in turn and made sure they all promised him.
They spend the whole day there. Playing games, exploring, crying, joking around, talking about all and everything – including some kid friendly stories from Buck’s days in service – and simply spending time together.
By nightfall everyone was exhausted, but Buck insisted they stayed until it was dark enough to see the stars.
They were laying on blankets that had been stashed in a corner of the cabin. “Do you see the constellation over there?” Buck pointed up in the sky. “The square, then the almost square and a triangle, and that’s the feet and that’s the hands.”
After making sure the other found the constellation Buck continued. “That is Hercules, the hero. He was my idol growing up, all I wanted was to become like him, dedicated to right his wrongs and brave and strong enough to be remembered forever and even worthy a place among the stars.”
“Tell them the legend as you learned it as a kid,” May said, eyes wandering over the stars.
“Do you want that? My version of the twelve labors of Hercules?”
As the kids around him eagerly agreed, Buck pulled them closer, making sure none of them was cold. “If I’m going to tell the tale of Hercules, I need you all to be qui- silent and listen, Okey?” Harry, Chris, Denny, Nia and May all nod.
“Hercules, the son of Zeus – the king of the gods – and a champion of humankind, looked in horror as he realized he had just committed the most unspeakable crime imaginable. The goddess Hera – Zeus' wife and queen of the gods – who hated Hercules for being a child of her husband and a human woman – had temporarily cursed him into madness. And in this state, he had killed his own family.”
“Field with grief, Hercules went to the Oracle of Delphi – an all knowing being that speaks of the future in riddles – who told him the path to amend lay with his cousin, King Eurystheus of Tiryns, and one of Hera's favorites.”
“Eurystheus wanted to humiliate Hercules with ten impossible tasks that put him against the worst monsters and unknown forces. Instead, he set the path of an epic adventure that would later be known as the Labors of Hercules.”
“The first task was to kill the Nemean Lion – a gigantic lion with fur of gold – who kidnapped women and ate warriors. No arrow could penetrate its skin, but Hercules cornered the lion inside its dark cave, knocked it unconscious with a club and strangled it with his hands. He didn’t have a tool sharp enough to skin the beast until Athena – the goddess of knowledge – told him to use the lions’ own claws.”
“Hercules returned to Tiryns wearing the lions’ fur as a cape, scaring King Eurystheus so much he hid in a box. After that Hercules was told to prove his victory at a distance.”
“The second task was the Lernaean Hydra – a gigantic snakelike creature with seven heads – Hercules fought it as good as he could but for each head he cut off two more grew back. It all seemed hopeless, until Iolaus – his nephew – thought about burning the stumps when they were cut so no more could regrow. Together they were able to kill the monster. The remains of the hydra became a constellation. It’s over there.” Buck pointed out the stars making up the Hydra constellation.
“Instead of killing a monster, Hercules' next task was to catch one alive. The Ceryneian Hind was a deer so fast it could outrun any projectile. Hercules tried to follow it for a year, before he was able to trap it in the northern land of Hyperborea. The animal was holy to Artemis – the goddess of hunting and the moon – so Hercules promised to return it. Eurystheus demanded to keep the deer when he saw it, but as soon as Hercules let go, the deer ran back to Artemis. In doing so Hercules was able to complete the task without breaking his promise to the goddess.”
“The fourth task was to capture the Erymanthian boar – a gigantic pig – which had destroyed a big among of farmland. With the tips from the centaur Chiron – a centaur has the body of a horse but instead of a neck it has the upper body of a human – Hercules was able to trap the boar by chasing it into a big amount of snow so he could tie it up.”
“The fifth task didn’t involve any animals, just their poop,” Harry, Denny and Christopher giggled but Buck ignored them as he continued. “The stable where King Augeas kept his cattle – hundreds of them – hadn’t been cleaned in ages. Hercules promised to clean it in one day if he could keep one-tenth of the animals. Augeas expected the hero to fail and accept. Instead, Hercules dug massive trenches rerouting two rivers to flow through the stables until they were completely clean.”
“Next were three more monsters, each needing a smart strategy to defeat. The meat-eating Stymphalian birds living in an impenetrable swamp, but Hercules used some special rattle belonging to Athena to scare them into the air before he shot them down. No mortal could stand against the Cretan bull’s rampage, but a chokehold from behind did the trick. The mad King Diomedes, who had trained his horses to eat his guests, got a taste of his own medicine as Hercules pushed him into his own stable. The feast claimed the monsters enough for Hercules to bind them, securing their mouths.”
“But the ninth task involved someone more dangerous than any monster, it involved Hippolyta, Queen of the Amazons. Hercules was to get her belt, given to her by her father – the god of war – Ares. He sailed to Themyscira – the land of the Amazons – ready for battle, but the queen was so impressed with Hercules previous tasks she gave him the belt willingly.”
“For the tent task Hercules had to steal a herd of magical red cattle from Geryon – a giant with three heads and three bodies. On his way to the giant Hercules had to cross the Libyan desert, becoming so annoyed at the heat he shoots an arrow straight at the sun. Helios – the good of the sun – was so impressed at Hercules strength he lent him his chariot on the journey to the island of Erytheia. At the island Hercules fought off the Greyon’s herdsman and his two headed dogs, before killing the giant himself.”
“That should have been the end of Hercules’ tasks, but Eurystheus told him two tasks didn’t count: the hydra because he had help from Iolaus and the stable of King Augeas because he had accepted payment.”
“Therefore, Hercules set out on his eleventh task, to get a golden apple from the garden of the Hesperides nymphs – nymphs are human forms of nature, often connected to a specific phenomenon. The Hesperides nymphs were connected to the evening and the sunset. Hercules began by catching the Old Man of the Sea and forcing him to reveal the garden’s location. In the garden he found the titan Atlas holding up the heaven. Hercules offered to switch places if Atlas would get the apples. Atlas was happy to do something else, but Hercules tricked him into taking heaven again after he returned with the apples.”
“The twelfth and final task was to bring back Cerberus – an enormous three headed dog guarding the gates of the underworld. With the help of Hermes and Athena Hercules met Hades – the god of the death – himself. The king of the underworld let him take his dog if he could control the monster without any weapons. Hercules was able to do so by grabbing all three heads at once, forcing the dog to walk with him. When he presented Cerberus to a horrified Eurystheus the king finally declared Hercules debt paid.”
“After twelve years of extremely hard work Hercules had redeemed the tragic deaths of his family and earned a place among the gods. But his victory held an even deeper importance. In overcoming the chaotic forces and monsters of the world, Hercules swept away what remained of the Titan’s primordial order, reshaping it into one where humans could thrive. Through his labors, Hercules tamed the world's madness by amending for his own.”
Harry let out a soft ‘Oh’ all three of the boys looked at him with big eyes. May gave him a sad smile while Nia had fallen asleep somewhere in the story, it being way too late to the young girl.
“Come on, we are already extremely late, let’s get you all home,” Buck said standing up.
“I texted everyone saying we were staying out late; do you want me to inform them we are heading back?” May asked as she helped the kids up, before picking up Nia.
“That would be great, Denny and Nia are staying with you tonight, right?”
“Yes, Hen and Karen as well, they volunteered to help set up your goodbye party tomorrow.”
Buck folded the blanks and placed them back in their spot before grabbing a tired Christoper. May walked first with Nia, followed by Harry and Denny as Buck and Chris made up the rear end.
Down by the cars Buck and Christopher said bye to the others, watching May turn into the road before following, driving home.
Chapter 6: Nightly Talk and a Few Medals
Chapter Text
Eddie stood outside waiting on them when Buck turned into the driveway. After parking in his spot Buck stepped out of the car and opened the door to the backseat.
Careful as to not wake Chris that had fallen asleep on the car ride back, Buck maneuvered the kid out of the car and walked towards the door.
“Can you lock my jeep? The keys are still in?” Buck asked lowly to Eddie when he was close enough.
“Just bring him directly to bed, one night without brushing his teeth won’t give him holes.” Eddie answered, opening the entrance door for Buck.
Buck gave him a warm smile before walking inside. The lights were on and the door to Chris bedroom was open which meant Eddie had anticipated Chris to be asleep when they returned.
Buck quickly changed Chris into his pajamas and laid him down in the bed. After pulling up the blanket he leaned down and kissed Chris’ curls. “You are a gift to humanity, Superman.”
“Love u’” Chris mumbled back, turning in his bed and falling asleep again.
Taking in the boy that could as well be his own flesh and blood Buck had to take a moment, worst case scenario he would never be able to see him sleep ever again.
Buck didn’t know how long he stood there before Eddie gently wrapped an arm around his waist pulling him with him away from the sleeping boy. Instead of taking him to the living room where Buck though they were heading, Eddie guided him into his own bedroom, gently making sure they both sat down on the bed.
Tuning to face him, Eddie used his thumb to sweep away some stray tears. Buck didn’t even know he had been crying. “What if I don’t make it back?”
Instead of answering Eddie pulled him into a hug. Holding him as close as he could.
“I didn’t have anyone to worry about when I was in active service. Mom and dad ignored me most of my childhood, unless I did something wrong. Maddie was married to Dough, so I wasn’t in contact with her. The friends I made in Rhode Island were still at the academy or serving as well. I have never had someone to come home to before.” Buck's voice was muffled by Eddie's shoulder, but Eddie was able to make out what he was saying anyway.
“I have never been the one waiting at home, I was always the one who left and faced danger. Everything is new territory right now, and none of us know how to handle it. But that’s okay. We have each other and our family and friends and that’s everything we need to make it through this. It’s three weeks of training when you are going to be on US soil and safe, then a single mission. Nothing more. It won’t be like other deployments; you won’t be gone for months on end.”
“I know, I know,” Buck sniffled, “I will only be gone maybe a month, but there is a risk I won’t make it back. And I don’t want to face the risk of not returning home to you and Chris.”
“Evan,” Eddie pulled away so he could look Buck in the eyes. “I know you; you would always fight to return to us and,” Eddie gave him a playful, but still sad smile, “I was promised a wedding when you return this morning. Not that I have gotten a ring yet.”
“Oh,” Buck showed Eddiel lightly, watching as he fell into the mattress. The first smile in hours ghosting at his lips.
“You are getting something more important than a ring tomorrow, but if you really want one, I’m sure I could find one for you.”
“No,” Eddie grabbed Buck and pulled him down more or less on top of himself. “Whatever you have picked out is going to be perfect.”
***
Buck was staring at himself in the mirror. He was wearing his khaki uniform for the first time in a long time. As real as it had felt when Commander Philips visited the fire station, being back in his military uniform took the seriousness to another level, but it also helped ground Buck.
He knew that whatever happened now, he had to do it for his country, for the American people and for the safety of his friends and family. For the safety of Eddie and Chris.
There was a light knock on the bathroom door. “We have to leave now if we don’t want to be late,” Eddie informed him.
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Buck mumbled as he turned and walked out of the bathroom and almost crashed into Eddie.
“Refugio santo, Dios tenga piedad,” [Holy haven, God have mercy] Eddie mumbled, but he wasn’t looking at Buck or rather he was looking at one specific spot. His chest. More correctly his ribbons. “Is that…?” The question died down.
“Yes, it is. I didn’t want most of them, can’t really speak about them either.”
“The medal of honor…”
“I was captured, presumed KIA, and had to rescue myself and make it back to safe territory. Woke up in the hospital four months later with the medal. Made it through two more tours before being moved into the reserves.” Buck shrugged.
Eddie pulled him into a bone crushing hug. “I love you. I love you. I love you, and that will never change, whatever you have been through or what you must do to survive, I will always love you.”
“Mise freisin, tá sé linn go deo,” [Me too, it’s us forever] Buck answered.
Eddie blinked up at him. “You know, you should speak Irish more often. Maddie may be the only one able to understand you, but you should be able to use your mother tongue freely.”
“Growing up we weren't allowed to use it outside of the house, but it’s part of our culture you know. Like speaking Spanish is part of yours and Christophers.”
“Maybe you could teach us something when you return?”
Buck leaned in and kissed Eddie, “I am sure we could figure something out, but we definitely should leave now.”
Chapter 7: Niece, Let It Go and Goodbyes
Chapter Text
Buck had to take a moment before he could enter Bobby and Athena’s house, so Eddie and Chris went inside first to give him some time to collect himself. To his surprise it was Chimney that came to check on him after someone – probably Bobby – had deemed that he was using too long.
“With the two you have in there, you don’t need another reason to return home, but I am going to give you one anyway.” Buck looked quizzical at the shorter man.
“Maddie is pregnant,” Chimney explained.
“WHAT?!”
“We only found out last week, we were going to keep it a secret until she was over the most critical period, but you better be there to welcome your nephew or niece.”
“Niece, it’s going to be a girl. And you better take care of my sister and her baby, if not …” Buck let the sentence hang in the air between them, but the tears in the corner of his eyes betrayed him.
“You are a big scary Navy SEAL. I have absolutely nothing against you. Come on, you better come inside before Bobby comes out here and drags you inside by your ear.” Chimney pated Buck on the arm nagging him towards the house.
Buck had to wipe away some tears and take some deep collecting breaths before he and Chimney walked through the entrance.
“May, may, may,” Athena exclaimed as soon as Buck – followed by Chimney – entered the living room. “You clearly know how to clean up.”
Athena engulfed Buck into a bear hug and everyone else followed suit. Even Ravi, that wasn’t huge on physical contact. Buck spent some extra time when he hugged Maddie whispering “I’m so happy for you and Chim, congratulation on the girl.” Maddie simply hugged him tighter, whipping away some tears when they separated.
“Come on,” Bobby said as soon as Buck had made it through everyone there. “Let’s sit and eat, I am sure Buck will tell us what he can when we are seated.”
They all scramble to make it to the table, everyone wanting to hear about Buck's time before he moved to Los Angeles. The food that was placed on the table was a complete feast. Buck could recognize several of Bobby’s, Athena's, Karen’s and even Maddie’s’ signature dishes. All his favorites. Buck had to fight back his tears, knowing he would cry plenty before the day was over anyway.
Buck waited until everyone had food on their plates before speaking up. “I can’t really give you many details about my service. I am a Navy SEAL, and was Special Ops, so everything I did is classified. But I can tell you a few things, and some very nondescript stories.”
“You never told me you enlisted; can you start with that?” Maddie asked, looking up at him.
“We didn’t know either, we believed you dropped out during hell week,” Chimney added.
“Bobby was the only one I told; my service is in my file at work. Eddie figured it out when we pulled a grenade out of a man’s leg, because I used to be my team’s underwater explosion expert, meaning I wasn’t as clueless as I pretended to be.”
“So, all the basic questions were a lie?” Hen asked.
“Yes. Out there in the field you would rather be underrated, and better safe than sorry.” Hen nodded at the answer. “Make sense.”
“Instead of going to high school in Hershey my parents sent me to a military boarding school out of state,” Buck began from the beginning. Eddie gently squeezed his knee under the table. “After a rough start I excelled and graduated early. Before I knew it, I was joining the navy SEAL and after a small hiccup I was shipped out to my first deployment.”
Eddie snorted. “Small hiccup? You are calling: accidentally stumbling into and successfully stopping a human trafficking ring for a small hiccup?”
The table was full of shocked faces. “How do you know that?” Athena asked, voicing what they all were wondering.
“We exchanged callsign on Friday, it doesn’t say you all anything, but it did turn out we had heard stories about each other while serving,” Buck explained before stuffing his mouth full of lasagna.
“I served for ten years total, before being moved into the reserves. Which I will be in until I turn sixty-two. Somewhere along the way I picked up flying and as I’m being called back to Top Gun or Fighter Weapons School as it’s actually named – it’s extended teaching for naval aviators – I guess I am going to fly again.” Buck let his words register to the people around him.
“Don’t you, like, have to have been regularly flying for that?” Karen asked, confusion clear in her voice.
“I am in reserve training – including some hours airborne – five days every third month. I’m actually surprised no one of you has clocked me being gone so often before now.” Buck shrugged.
“Tell them about the time you took down a suicide bomber by singing Let it Go from the top of your lungs,” Eddie gave Buck a playful grin.
“How- how do you even know about that?” His blue eyes become comically large.
“Everyone in the sandbox at the time knew what you pulled.”
“Is that a kid friendly story?” Michael – Athena's ex-husband – questioned.
“Not really. It could be downplayed,” Buck admitted.
One story turned into several. Even if he couldn’t share many details, Buck was still able to tell them a thing or two. Most of which was things he had done outside of actual missions, enjoying downtime with his former teammates.
Dinner turned into dessert and before anyone knew it hours had gone by, and the clock was ticking dangerously close to when Buck had to leave to make it to North Island before it became too late at night.
“I have something I want to say to you all before I leave,” Buck announced, gaining the attention of everyone. “And if I’m going to be able to make it through everything I want to say without breaking down you shouldn’t interrupt me.”
The kids and adults arranged themselves, so they were sitting down on the couches, and different chairs as Buck stood watching them all.
“I am not saying this because I believe I won’t return, but because I know what it is like out there and tomorrow is not promised to any of us. You all know by now that my parents weren’t the best. They are ‘good people but bad parents’ as Maddie use to say.” That got a smile out of several of them.
“I wasn’t the easiest to deal with when I joined the 118. I had only been a civilian for a couple of months and still had some trouble integrating into a society I never really was a part of. So I want to thank you all for helping me on that journey, you have done so much more for me than you will ever know.”
“Cap – Bobby – you took me under your wing and gave me the help and education every father should give their son. You have been there every time I needed you and by my bed every time I was hurt. Thank you for being a father to me.”
Buck turned from his captain to his wife. The two of them were holding onto each other. “Athena, we may have gotten off to a bad start, but by every day that goes by I am more and more happy I get to know you and be a part of your family. You are the most kick-ass woman I have met, which includes the women I meet on deployment.”
“May, you are the little sister I didn’t know I wanted until I met you. You are so strong and independent and as much as you are like Athena, you also remind me of myself when I was your age. Follow your dream, no one can walk your path but yourself.”
“Harry and Denny, watch out for Christopher for me, can you?” The two boys in question both hold out their pinky. “You are great friends, and I will miss you every day. Remember if life is hard that only means you’re on your way upwards.”
“Nia,” Buck kneeled down to be at eye level with the little girl. “You may not have been part of this family for a long time, but I hope you will stay here long. This family is big and chaotic, but I wouldn’t change it for anything in this universe. Enjoy your time here.”
Buck stood up, finding two of his teammates. “John, Stover, keep the rest of them safe out there fighting fires, would you. I need someone level headed out there to make sure the rest of my family doesn’t do something stupid.”
“Ravi, you may not have been at the 118 for a long time, but if you are able to live with the chaos of A-shift you can survive everything. They may be noisy and all up in your business, but it’s no one who would have your back more out there in the field, when you need it the most. I hope you find your spot among them and blossom into a great firefighter.”
Buck shifted uneasily on his feet. “Hen, you were the first friend I made at the 118, and you always walk to the beat of your own drum. You are an amazing human, and I’m honored to have known someone as strong as you.”
“Michael, Karen, Josh, Carla. You may not be as integrated into the family at the 118 as you should be, but you all are amazing people that I am so happy I meet. We all are grateful for everything you do. If this mystery mission goes sideways, they are all going needing all the support and help they can get. Please watch over the people here for me.”
“Chimney, welcome to the family. You are exactly what Maddie needs in a man. Take care of her and you better be prepared to stand up for her against our parents. I may be pressing all your buttons from time to time, but really isn’t that the job of your girlfriend’s younger brother?” Buck gave him a playful grin before moving to his sister, sitting in Chimney's lap.
“Maddie, you are the best sister anyone could ask for. Growing up you always had my back and watched out for me. You went to every game and competition I had and took me out for ice cream afterwards. You were there more than our parents ever were. You may not have been there my whole life, but I am so grateful you came to me when you needed it. I will always be your safe harbor. I am so proud to be your brother.”
Buck had to take a moment and wipe away some tears before turning to the two people left. “Christopher, I am going to miss you so much each and every day. You are like a son to me, one of the best things that has ever happened to me. I need you to stay strong for dad okay. Don’t hide your emotions, but Eddie is going to be needing to be remembered why he should be happy sometimes as well. I will always fight to return to you, you are my absolute favorite. Just … Just-“ Buck voice wavered. “Just keep swimming, Superman.”
“Eddie, you are my everything. I didn’t want to take the leap in our relationship because I couldn’t risk losing what we already have, but it was so worth it. You are it for me Edmundo Diaz. You are my everything. I don’t have a ring for you, but I have something more important.” Buck pulled out a medium size jewelry box and stepped forwards. When he was close enough to the other man, he sank down into one knee opening the box and revealing a necklace. A patron medallion.
“Is that … Is that St. Eustace?” Eddie asked with wonder in his voice.
“Yes. Abuela helped me pick it out. Now that I am wearing your St. Christopher medallion,” someone in the room gasped, “I need someone else to protect you. I may not be a catholic, but it is your culture and childhood. Who better to watch over my firefighter than the patron saint of fire prevention, firefighters, hunters, hunting and against fire, family discord and difficult situations. Eddie, you are my … I –“ Buck closed his eyes taking some visible shaking breaths.
“Is tú solas mo dhorchadais. An té a mbeidh mo chroí I gcónaí aige. Tá grá ag-“ [You are the light of my darkness. The one who will always have my heart. I lov-] Buck broke off, unable to finish the sentence. Tears running freely down his face. Eddie lounged forwards and kissed him passionately.
When they separated, Buck wasn’t the only one that was crying. Everyone was. Buck gave Eddie another kiss, shorter this time before he held up the necklace.
Eddie had to help Buck put the medallion on him, because he was shaking so much he couldn’t hold it open to get it over Eddie's head. When the medallion was in place Buck leaned down and kissed it. “Keep him safe for me.”
Eddie pulled him into a strong hug, and they held each other, crying together. “I love you. Te amo,” [I love you] Eddie whispered in Bucks ear on repeat.
No one knew how long they simply held each other before an alarm on Bucks phone started ringing. Signaling he had to leave.
Saying goodbye to everyone was hard and took its time but Buck did eventually make it to his car and out of Bobby and Athena’s driveway. The others were standing outside, watching as he drew away. Eddie was standing in attention, tears running down his face.
Chapter 8: Top Gun, Old Acqueintances and Training Start
Chapter Text
Buck woke up two hours early on his first day back at Top Gun. Not being able to fall back asleep he decided to go on a run instead, blaring army cadets from a small speaker. He chose the old but well used track just outside the base. Buck found something calming about running on the familiar path he regularly used on his original stay at North Island. The cadets helped him to get into the mindset he knew he needed to be in if he was going to make it through the upcoming mission.
The base was up and running when he returned. Back in his room Buck took a quick shower before eating breakfast. Taking a moment, he held onto the medallion around his neck taking a few liberated breaths before making his way over to what would be his classroom for the next three weeks.
The hangar was already mostly full, although he was early. It seemed like most of them were waiting to learn why they were all called back to Top Gun. Stopping close to the door, Buck looked over the other aviators. He didn’t expect to spot a familiar face, so he was surprised to spot not only one but two familiar faces.
One was a woman he had saved on deployment a long time ago, and the other was one of his classmates when he did attend Top Gun.
“Bob, didn’t think I would see your face ever again.” Buck took the seat behind Bob and next to an unfamiliar woman.
Bob turned to him, shock clearly visible on his face. “Damn America, I didn’t expect you here. The last thing I heard; you were retired and going through some academy. How did you end up back here?”
Taking in the others Buck noticed most of the people in the room were paying attention to the conversation. Witch, to be fair, he was the odd one out, so he understood they wanted to know who he was. And well, they had probably heard a thing or two about his call sign.
“I wasn’t discharged, only moved to the reserves. I’m stuck there until I age out or die. Didn’t believe they would ever call me back though, especially since I am a firefighter now. Someone high up had other plans, so here I am.” Buck shrugged.
“Callsign’s America, me and Bob graduated Top Gun together.” Buck presented himself to the two women with them.
“I’m Callie, callsign Halo and she is Natasha, callsign Phoenix,” The woman sitting next to Buck said, nodding toward the woman in front of them. Phoenix, so she was the one he had saved why back when she was being harassed in this local grocery shop. She didn’t seem to recognize him, something that probably was for the best.
“Attention on deck!” A woman in the front yelled making them all stand up, Buck naturally ended up in parade rest. The other twelve students followed close behind.
Two fighter jets passed outside; they could hear the rumble over the scraping of the chairs. In the corner of his eyes Buck spotted Rear Admiral “Warlock” and another admiral he was unfamiliar with steeping inside.
“Morning.” Warlock started with his monotone voice when he stopped at the front of the class. “Welcome to your special training detachment.”
“Be seated.” At the commando they all sat down in their respective chairs.
“I’m Admiral Bates, NAWDC commander,” Warlock introduced himself. “You’re all Top Gun graduates. The elite. The best of the best.” He soothed a small grimace of something Buck guessed was unpleasantly as his gaze lingered at him for a moment. To say their relationship was rocky was an understanding. The man had constantly hacked down on Buck when he was attending Top Gun, as he wasn't exactly thrilled to have an outsider at the prestigious school.
Luckily, he moved on before the others could catch the grimace. “That was yesterday.” Everyone paled at the admirals’ words. Knowing fully that this was a serious mission, probably the hardest anyone of them had been on. Buck silently hoped he had had worse.
“The enemy’s new fifth-generation fighter has leveled the playing field. Details are few, but you can be sure we no longer possess the technological advantage. Success, now more than ever, comes down to the man or woman in the box. Half of you will make the cut. One of you will be named mission leader. The other half will remain in reserve. Your instructor is a Top Gun graduate with real-world experience in every mission aspect you will be expected to master.” Warlock continued in the same monotone, completely serious tone.
Hearing low footsteps from behind, Buck turned his head, spotting the legend himself. Captain Pete Mitchell. Maverick. Buck had had the honor to fly with him once and let’s just say both of them were yelled at by their commanding officers that day.
“His exploits are legendary. And he’s considered one of the finest pilots this program has ever produced. What he has to teach you may very well mean the difference between life and death.” As the others started noticing the captain as well, Buck studied the cascade of negative emotions that crossed over most of his classmates' faces.
“I give you captain Pete Mitchell. Call sign: ‘Maverick.’” As Warlock ended his introduction, he held the captain's gaze some seconds before he stepped to the side, letting the other man take the podium.
“Good morning.” Maverick smiled and gave a small nod, looking over the class. He may be legendary, but Buck knew that he was – as himself – a man of action rather than world. He probably wasn’t actually so happy having to teach 12 of the nation’s best naval aviators – and Buck.
“The F-18 NATOPS.” Maverick began, holding up the manual. “It contains everything they want you to know about your aircraft. I’m assuming you know the book inside and out.” The people around Buck gave answers like “Damn right.” “Yeah.” “Damn straight.” and “You got it.” Buck on the other hand stayed silent. He had seen something like this before. It was probably just to prove a point. One of his instructions as BUDs had pulled something like that when he told them that the enemy knew their training.
Watching the captain throw the manual into a nearby trashcan Buck nodded to himself. At last it wasn’t set on fire this time. He rolled his eyes at the confusion of the other aviators and the two onlooking admirals. Really? That was a classic move.
“So does your enemy.” Mavrick informed them all.
A warrant officer with black glasses – staying alone at the side – that Buck hadn't paid attention to mumbled “And we’re off.” It made Buck frown slightly. Somehow, he had known where this had headed better than the two admirals. Must be a friend of Maverick then concluded Buck.
“But what the enemy doesn’t know is your limits.” The captain began. “I intend to find them, test them, push beyond. Today we’ll start with what you only think you know. You show me what you’re made of.” Taking a deep breath in Buck closed his eyes for a moment. Laying his hand over where the medallion was hidden under his shirt.
Chapter 9: Names, Flying and the Truth of the Mission
Chapter Text
“Now, we are going to take a short round making sure everyone knows who everyone is, then we are heading out at the airstrip, inspecting all the planes.” Maverick said, moving down from the podium.
“What do you want us to do? Introduce us and say two facts about ourselves? Like in middle school?” A cocky blond man asked.
“Sure, we can do that.” Mavrick had a challenging smile. “Why don’t you begin?”
The man growled but actually listened. “I’m Jack Seresin, callsign Hangman. I come straight from Strike Fighter Squadron One Five One and have a confirmed air to air combat kill.” He flashed them all a blending smile, Buck rolled his eyes at the man’s ego.
“I’m Natasha Trace, callsign Phoenix.” Phoenix began, not waiting for someone else. “I normally belong to Strike Fighter Squadron 41 and grew up outside San Francisco.”
“My name is Robert Floyd, callsign and nickname Bob.” Bob followed. “I am assigned to Fighter Squadron 51, and I have a bachelor's degree in social work.”
“I am Ruben Fitch, callsign Payback. I belong to Strike Fighter Squadron 125 and am a third-generation fighter pilot.” The man had dark skin and a small mustache.
“Name is Mickey Garcia, callsign Fanboy. I belong to Strike Fighter Squadron 143 and was a national football champion twice during high school.” The man next to Payback informed them.
“I’m Javy Machado, my callsign is Coyote. I come from Strike fighter Squadron 86, and my parents own a bakery.” Another one of their classmates spoke up.
“I am Bradley Bradshaw, callsign Rooster.” A man in the front with a noticeable 80s mustache began. “I’m normally assigned to Strike Fighter Squadron 87, and I grew up close by here.”
“My name is Neil Vikander, my callsign is Omaha. I normally belong to Strike Fighter Squadron 136, and I am half Swedish.” He had fair skin, and brown hair styled backwards.
“I’m Bringham Lennox, callsign Havard. I’m normally attached to Strike Fighter Squadron 11 and my ancestors are all German.” The man had brown curly hair, sitting on the very end of his chair.
It’s silent a moment before an Asian man spoke up. “Logan Lee, callsign Yale. Strike Fighter Squadron 11, I am married.”
“I am Callie Bassett, my callsign is Halo. I’m attached to Strike Fighter Squadron 22, and I speak Mandarin and Hangzhou.” Halo informed the others from her seat next to Buck.
“Name’s Billy Avalone, callsign’s Fritz. I normally operate under Strike Fighter Squadron 2, and I was deployed in Iraq until six weeks ago.” A black-haired man with golden skin was the last one off the lot.
“Everyone simply calls me Buck so you way as well. My callsign is America and unlike the rest of you I belong in the reserves. I grew up in Pennsylvania.” Buck informs the other sticking to not give out any more information that he had to.
Mavrick eyed Buck a moment before he clapped his hands together. “That must be good enough for now. Gear up and let’s inspect the planes.” They all scramble to get up and do as they were told.
On his way over to find his fighter jet Buck noticed Rooster and Maverick having some sort of argument, but they weren’t close enough for anyone to hear. Even Hangman that was closest didn’t seem to hear, but he did indeed notice the argument too.
Walking between the aircrafts Buck eventually found his, noticing with a small ‘thank you’ that it was a single seater. Theoretically he could fly with a weapon system operational, but he definitely preferred to fly alone. Being able to push a lot more when he didn’t have anyone else’s life to worry about.
Running through his mental checklist Buck quickly decided the F-18 he was assigned was in top shape and ready to fly. “America, Payback, Fanboy!” Mavrick shouted, drawing everyone’s attention. “You are up first. The rest of you head back with Hondo.” He gestured toward the warrant officer that had followed behind.
Buck beamed. He loved the feeling flying gave him, and flying with a proper wingman gave him a surge deep in his stomach. He’d missed this.
Flight training in the reserve wasn’t the same, they were always pushed down to the minimum time and as flying wasn’t standard training it often ended with Buck flying the (easy) courses they had set up alone. Buck knew this was just the beginning and that he would spend as much time these next three weeks in the air as he could. He couldn’t say he was opposed to that.
Buck stated the standard flight checklist as soon as Hondo led the others away. Taking off as soon as he had clearance from the tower. The other two quickly joined him in their own fighter jet. Payback the pilot and Fanboy the WSO.
As soon as they came high enough, they pulled into a tight formation, flying next to each other. They had barely been airborne a few minutes before Maverick’s voice filled their ears thru the intercoms.
“Good morning aviators. This is your captain speaking.” Buck let out a little laugh. “Welcome to basic fighter maneuvers. As briefed, today’s exercise is dog fighting. Guns only, no missiles. We do not go below the hard deck of 5,000 feet. Working as a team, you have to shoot me down, or else.”
“Or else what, sir?” Payback or fanboy asked. Buck wasn’t exactly sure. Not having heard them speak enough to differentiate their voices yet. “Or else I shoot back. If I shoot either one of you down, you lose.” The captain informed them.
“What say we put some skin in the game?” Buck glanced over, realizing it was Payback talking.
“What do you have in mind?” Maverick wondered.
“Whoever gets shot down first has to do 200 push-ups.” The other one – Fanboy – proposed.
“Remember you have to be able to pay up,” Buck tried to discourage the duo.
“Guys. That’s a lot of push-ups.” The captain remembered them.
“They don’t call it an exercise for nothing, sir.” Someone – Buck thought it had to be Fanboy – said with a little laugh. Buck couldn’t help himself and shock his head. He had missed this type of banter. Don’t get him wrong, the banter at the fire station was great, but more times than not it had a serious undertone, this was entirely playful.
“You got yourself a deal, gentlemen. Fight’s on. Let’s turn and burn.” At the captains’ worlds Buck glared over to the other jet. “Fanboy, do you pick him up?”
The answer came immediately. “Nothing on the radar up ahead. He must be somewhere behind us.” The worlds were barely out of Fanboys mouth before the two F-18 was hit by a wave of force created as Maverick field from under them and BETWEEN Buck’s and Payback and Fanboy’s fighter jets, making them spin out of control.
“Damn it! Oh, shit!” Fanboy swore as Payback shouted, “What the Hell?” Buck couldn’t stop himself and mumbled “Ifreann, táimid chun bás a fháil.” [Hell, we are going to die.]
Buck had barely stabilized his plane as Fanboys panicking voice rung through his ears “Tally, tally, tally! Maverick’s coming in! Break left!” It was immediately followed by Payback confirming “Breaking left.”
“Payback, where’s your wingman?” Maverick asked, confused.
“America, where are you?” Payback questioned as Buck steered towards the other two fighter jets. “I have your back. I’m coming. Hang tight.” Buck promised.
“Hurry up, man! Hurry up!” Payback was clearly stressed. Buck took a deep breath before he accelerated flying in between the other two. Hindering Maverick from being able to lock into his wingman.
“Payback, break right.” “Breaking right.”
Buck turned left, making himself an easy target knowing the captain would follow him. “America just saved your life, fellas. But it’s going to cost him.”
“I may not have flown a sharp mission in five years, but I still have some tricks up my sleeve, old man.” Buck informed him. As soon as he was a safe distance away from Payback and Fanboy buck dropped vertically, keeping an eye on his attitude.
When he realized Mavrick wasn’t followed he immediately made a sharp U-turn, literally pulling an opposite Kvochur’s Bell, and burning as much fuel as possible to get to the other fighter jets. “Boys! Sharp 4 o’clock!”
“What?” Payback asked, confused. “There is nothing on our right?” Fanboy continued.
Buck was almost between them when their captain informed them “That’s a kill.” Buck grunted. “To your information, when I say sharp and a time, you are supposed to turn blindly in that direction, trusting I have your back.”
“Next time make sure you all understand each other.” Mavrick informed them as they all turned around to return to the ground.
The next pair was selected heading up in the air as Hondo overlooked Buck, Fanboy and Payback doing their push-ups at the side of the airstrip. Technically speaking Buck didn’t get shot down and therefore didn’t have to do them but feeling bad – and responsible – for his wingman being shot down he decided the last thing he could do was to take the push-ups with them.
“America, you don’t have to do this,” Payback told him when they passed 50 push-ups. “I didn’t have your backs, so no, I have to do this.” Buck answered with his ‘I’m-not-falling-for-your-bullshit’ voice and continued the push-ups at the speed Hondo was counting.
When they did finish, the three of them headed inside to listen in on the others taking their turn in the air. To say no one was able to get a lock on Maverick was an understatement. Standing on the ground Buck couldn’t help drawing the comparison to a game of cat and mouse. It appeared as if their captain was playing with them more than not.
In between the rounds Buck talked to the others, not sharing anything personal with them but making sure he got a read on his classmates. Most of them were at last familiar with each other, if not friends. Bob and himself was the only one that had met the other before, but Bob had shortly met the others at a bar yesterday evening.
Buck was glad no one asked him more about why he moved into the reserve after he told them an off-duty accident took down most of his former teammates, the rest of them being moved to the reserve as a premonition. Given his callsign and the looks some of them were sending him, they probably had heard some rumors about him. Thankfully no one mentioned it, and they did seem to understand it wasn’t a topic he liked talking about.
He did however get asked several questions about his job as a firefighter. Buck decided to tell them some of the milder stories, about calls that didn’t make the news. He didn’t want them to start digging and finding out everything he had been through the last few years. They didn’t have a reason to know intimate information about him. Not that that would be an easy job. He hasn’t told them any indicator about where he lived or even what his name is. No one had questioned him about it, they all only used callsigns on each other anyway. It was not like anyone who knew him used his name either, not even Maddie used his given name anymore. Only in special circumstances.
During the duration of the day Mavrick had rotated on all of them, clearly trying to find out how they flew with different people.
When Coyote, Omaha and Halo were flying as the last pair that day Warlock walked into the room. “America, can I get a word with you?”
“Why?” Buck questioned, looking at the admiral quizzical. “Nothing serious, I just need your help to fill in something on the paperwork that changes your status from ‘reserve’ to ‘active duty’.” Not believing him, Buck studied Warlock. As he wasn’t able to find something in his neutral stance, Buck nodded.
“Sure.” He stood up and followed the older man outside. They walked to a part of the base Buck had never been, not even in his time as a Top Gun student.
“Leave your phone and all other electronics here,” Warlock instructed. Buck knew this protocol and did as he was told.
The room they headed towards was guarded by two soldiers and they were both patted down before they were able to enter.
As soon as the door was closed (and locked?) behind them Buck turned to the admiral. “Why am I actually here? The aviators out there are the best this country has. I’m not here for my flying skills.”
“Actually, you are here partly for your flying skills, you are brave enough to try new things in situations that really need it, and a total natural, but no, that is not the main reason you were called back into action.” Warlock studied him, taking in everything he could.
“What I am about to tell you does not leave this room. At this exact moment there are only three people who know why you are here.”
“You, obviously, and Admiral Kazansky. Who is the last one? Can’t be captain Mitchell. Is it the other admiral that was with you this morning?”
“No, it’s not Simpson. It’s the secretary of defense, Caleb Logan. It’s his decision that vital information shall be withheld from everyone else included in this mission. Sometimes you don’t want people to know the consequences of failure since failure is no option. You are the backup plan if something doesn't work.”
Buck glared at the superior man in front of him. “I don’t like the sound of that.”
“Everyone is going to be informed they are going to take down a uranium enrichment plant before it becomes operational, but in reality, it is a nuclear bomb fabric. If this mission fails, we have intel that hints that several of the world’s worst terror organizations are going to have their hands on nuclear weapons. You are the only one with knowledge of the surrounding area to be able to do something if the mission fails. The fabric is laying in the Akovot valley.”
“Ifreann,” [Hell] Buck swore, putting his hands in front of his face and fell to his knees. “You want us to fly into that death trap? Don’t you know how many SAMs there are in the Akovot valley?”
“There aren't any other options. Experts have been looking into the known data, but it is the only option; all possibilities have been examined. This mission must be a success. We are possibly talking about the safety of the whole fucking world here.”
Buck moved his hands, meeting Warlock's eyes. “Do you swear on the life of the president?”
“I swear on the life of everyone with an American citizenship, including but not limited to the president himself and whoever gave you that necklace.”
Buck hadn’t notice he had pulled out the St. Christopher medallion and was now playing with it. “I will do the mission. I will make sure it is a success. But in response to doing so, I need you to do something as well.”
The admiral didn’t hesitate. “Anything. Name your price, and you will have it.”
Buck stared at him. He stood up and made himself as big and threatening as possible. “Anything?” He could visibly see the fear crossing the older man’s face, but he still nodded. “Anything.”
“I need you to personally inform former staff sergeant Edmundo Rafael Diaz about the risk of this mission and why you need me specifically. I also want you to make sure that all my payout from the navy in the event of my death will be given to him and his son for the rest of their life.”
Warlock literally shrunk into himself. “I can make sure the payment gets to him, but I can’t inform anyone about the nature of this mission. Even if it hadn’t broken so many laws and he had had the clarence to know any details, it would be too risky. It’s a reason why only the two of us and two others know the truth about the mission.”
“Clearance level won’t be a problem, and the laws always have loopholes. He isn’t just anyone, Eddie wouldn’t be considered a risk of any kind. He is Akita.”
“You are dating Akita? Or are you married? No, you aren’t sharing a surname. The two of you have to be an absolute power couple together.”
“Pretty sure we are engaged, I promised him a wedding when – if – I return from this mission.”
“Congratulations. I will investigate it and talk to the two others who know. If I can I am going to inform your fiancé everything about the mission. You both deserve it.”
Buck reached out his hand and shocked the admiral’s when he extended his own. “If that’s all, I should sleep. I arrived on base late last night and woke up early.”
Warlock walked up to the door and knocked four times rapidly. About twenty seconds later the door opened. “Have a good evening, Sir.”
Buck frowned at the ‘sir’ as the admiral clearly outranked him, but catching the almost sorrowful look Warlock had Buck realized it was out of respect rather than rank. By agreeing to the mission, offering his life in exchange for the possible life of millions, if not all of humanity, he had granted the full respect of the man.
Buck walked over and grabbed his phone and the other items he had laid aside. He noticed several texts from Eddie and immediately opened the chat.
‘Chris refuses to go to bed without telling you we love you.’
‘I know you probably are busy or tired or both but text a smiley or something, so we know you got the message.’
‘Chris wants to hear about the Greek gods instead of continuing on with the Hobbit, is this your doing?’
‘He just told me you taught them about Hercules on your trip on Saturday.’
‘I guess all the kids are going to have a Greek mythology phase now.’
‘We love you, so you better stay safe.’
‘We can’t lose you.’
Buck smiled down at his phone as he texted back.
‘Just finished for the day.’
‘I feel the same for you.’
‘Sorry if I gave him a new fixation, May asked if I could tell them my version of the myths, so I did.’
‘I will walk through Hell for you and Christopher.’
Buck had barely begun to walk back to the room he was given when his phone started vibrating indicating someone was calling him. Seeing a picture of Eddie in his firefighter uniform Buck accepted the call, holding his phone to his ear.
“Hey Eds, what is going on?”
“I miss you so much it physically hurts. How can you miss someone this much?”
“Oh, Mo chroí, I know this is a hard time, but you will make it through it.” [My heart]
“If it hurts so much now, when you aren’t even deployed yet. How much is it going to hurt when you actually are or if you don’t return home.”
“Would it help to know something about the mission?” Buck worried on his bottom lip.
“Can you tell me something?” Buck could clearly hear the hope in Eddie's voice.
“No, but one of my superiors may. He is going to investigate if he can tell you something or not.”
“I, yes, that would probably help. The uncertainty of the situation clearly doesn’t help. At last I want to know why they called you back, don’t they have enough fine people already in active service they could have called?”
“Hopefully you will be able to learn why. I can’t tell you. The rating is up by the way. But only for me. It’s a turquoise. I am sorry, but I don’t have a choice. I do however have a hidden advantage.”
“Buck – Evan – you can’t.” Buck could feel the devastation in Eddie's words. “I can’t lose you when I just got you. Not like this. I’m not strong enough for that. You are too important.”
“I’m sorry. I wish things were different, but they aren’t. Tá brón orm.” [I am sorry]
“You can’t tell the others. I don’t want them to worry even more. I can’t keep this from you and hopefully soon you will know why it must be me and no one else.”
“Can you, can you stay on the phone until I fall asleep?”
“Of course, everything I can do from here is yours. Everything .”
“Thank you,” Eddie sounded tired, and Buck clearly needed to sleep.
Still, Buck started telling Eddie facts about Finland and everything to distract them both.
He made it to his room, not caring where his clothes landed as he made his way towards the bed. Buck wasn’t sure if he was still talking by the time his head hit the pillow or not, but he did know Eddie was still there when he drifted off to sleep.
Chapter 10: Fighting Teammates and Yelling at the Universe
Chapter Text
The next few days of training fell into a rhythm. Running in the morning, dogfighting all day, food breaks in between and long phone calls in the evening.
It was clear Maverick was pitching them together to see who flew best together, constantly changing the combination about who flew with whom.
On the third day Buck had been flying with Phoenix and Bob and they had actually been able to shoot Mavrick down. Buck had pulled a turn that they weren’t trained (or allowed) to do and with a quick ‘Sharp south’ followed by Bob’s desperate ‘drop down, drop down’ Buck had flown straight toward Maverick’s fighter jet, and they had both taken out each other. Buck had announced ‘you are dead, captain’ only seconds before Maverick said ‘that’s a kill’. Buck had then tilted his plane to the side and passed his captains bear inches between them. He had been yelled at by multiple people for that.
Later that day – after lunch – Hangman and Rooster were sent up in the air together.
“So, Rooster, mind if I ask a personal question?” Hangman’s voice filled the room they were waiting in.
“Would it matter if I did?” Rooster sounded deflated. Buck didn’t like where this was heeding.
“So, what’s the story with you and Maverick? It seems like he’s got you ratted.” Buck shook his head. This was definitely not going to end well. If the feud between the two men continued one of them was going to hit the other.
“That’s none of your business. Now where the hell is he?”
“Been here the whole time.” Mavrick decided to enter the conversation.
“Hoolyy shiit.” Hangman was clearly shocked. Buck glanced over the flight data to see what was going on. The captain was currently inverted over Roosters fighter jet.
“You see me now?” Buck didn’t know someone could sound so gleeful and serious at the same time. “Come on, let’s get it over with.”
“Fight’s on!” Maverick and Rooster dipped down in a cobra maneuver.
“What is with these two?” Hangman voiced everyone’s thoughts.
“All right, you put us here. How are you gonna get yourself out?” Mavrick asked.
“You can bail out anytime.” Scratch what Rooster and Hangman had going on. The thing Rooster and Maverick had going on was worse.
“How low you want to go, Rooster?”
“I can go as low as you, sir! And that’s saying something.”
“What’s past is past. For both of us.” Okay, so it clearly was a story there, but Buck wasn’t sure if he wanted to know what it was about.
“You’d like to believe that, wouldn’t you?”
As they were talking Buck didn’t let his eyes wander from the data indicating their altitude. “Tá said chun a Chéile a mharú.” [They are going to kill each other.] It could turn bad so quickly. Buck had witnessed superior and inferior driving each other to the ground before, unable to step in and stop the feud. He really hoped this wouldn’t turn out as fatal as the last time.
“Hard deck is 5’000 feet, fellas. You are running out of room.” Hangman’s voice rang through the speaker. Buck could hear the others in the room shift nervously. His eyes didn’t move from the data, but he could tell they were all nervous.
“Altitude.” The automatic voice kicked in as Maverick and Rooster crossed the invisible barricade.
“Your strategy is about to run us into the ground.” That’s the first time Buck had heard even an ounce of uncertainty in the captain’s voice. If Maverick was becoming worried it definitely wasn’t going to end well.
“What’s your move?”
‘Altitude. Altitude. Altitude.’ Was repeated over and over again speeding up as closer to the ground the duo was getting. As the pair crossed under 3’000ft Buck held his breath. He didn’t want to know who it ended but he was unable to move his eyes from the rapidly lowering number.
When they hit under 1’000ft the automatic voice started shouting ‘Pull up! Pull up!’ but the planes continued spiraling. Buck couldn’t take it anymore. He shouted “FUCK!” as he stood up and ran out of the room.
Buck didn’t stop running before he was at the beach next to the bar the aviators used to spend time at. As much destruction as the ocean had given him, he needed its chaos at that moment.
Buck quickly striped down to only his boxer and socks and walked out into the water. When it went up to about his mid-thigh he screamed at the top of his lungs and dropped to his knees.
Trying to get all the buildup emotions – all the fear, anger, sadness and unclarity – out of his body Buck yelled at the sky and the ocean in his mother tongue. Because realistically speaking, what other options did he have? He couldn’t change the past and he knew he would probably be dead in three weeks. There was nothing he could do about it. Not as long as so many lives were on the line.
Buck didn’t know how long he sat there, but his tears had stopped, and his voice had gone horse, not to speak about who wet he was, when someone grabbed him around his middle and Buck let whoever it was pulling him back to the shore.
“The fuck, America! What are you doing?!” That was Maverick.
Turning his head, Buck spotted a woman and a teenage girl next to the captain.
“I needed to calm the storm inside me,” Buck answered, casually stretching his feet, ignoring how horse his voice was or that he was almost naked in front of his captain, an unfamiliar woman and a teenager a year or two younger than May.
“Why –“ Maverick stopped himself. “You are a navy SEAL?”
“Sure, I am. Listen, I’m sorry. I'm going to put on my clothes, walk back to base and take a shower. You can all go back to whatever you were doing before. It’s okay. I’m fine.”
“America – Buck – you were sitting in the ocean screaming and crying. You are not fine.”
“I will be after a shower and a phone call with Eddie and Chris.” Buck moved around the three others grabbing his closet and dressing himself quickly. With shoes in his hand, he turned to Maverick. “See you tomorrow. Enjoy your evening.”
Without letting anyone else say something, Buck walked away – heading towards the base.
He didn’t make it back. Mavrick stopped him with his bike. “America, what is going on?”
Buck rolled his eyes. “I told you. I needed to calm the storm. I promise I am fine now. I just needed to get something under control. It’s under control now.”
The captain opened his mouth to argue, but he closed it as a car skidded to a stop in front of them. They both watched as a familiar man jumped out. “Buck!”
“Eddie!” Buck was running toward him as Maverick let out a surprised “Akita?”
Neither of the firefighters paid any attention to the older pilot as they kissed each other passionately.
“You are wet and cold,” Eddie commented when their lips separated.
“I had to yell at the universe,” Buck told him as if it explained everything, and for the two of them, it did.
“Come on, we have to get you showered before we can get married. No offense but you have to dress up for that.”
Buck removed himself from Eddie's arms. “What? Since when are we getting married today ? Chris isn’t even here.”
“Maddie is bringing him. They are meeting us at a small church close by. We can have a proper ceremony or celebration with our friends and family after your mission, but we are getting married today.”
“Okay,” Buck agreed, easily letting Eddie guide him to the car. They could hear Mavericks utterly confused “What the fuck just happened?” but decided to ignore him.
Eddie opened the car door and helped Buck inside, securing him with the seat belt. “Eds, you know I can do these things myself right?”
“Yes, I know that, but let me treat you today. Please.”
Buck waited until Eddie was inside the car, both doors closed, before he asked, “Why are we getting married exactly today?”
Eddie didn’t look at him as he began driving back the way he was coming from – towards the base. “I talked to Admiral Solomon Bates today. He told me the truth about this mission. Why you are important, the closest thing they have to guarantee a success, and that the mission can’t fail. Why it wasn’t an option.” He had to stop for a moment. “I know the possibilities, and the regret and pain would be worse if I didn’t at last get to call you mine once. So, we are getting married today. Only the two of us, Christopher and Maddie.”
“Okay, yeah, let’s get married as soon as I have showered and changed.”
Eddie laughed.
Chapter 11: Getting Married, Family Feels and a Wedding Gift
Chapter Text
Buck and Eddie made it to the small church willing to wed them in record time without breaking any law. Maddie and Chris were already there so they were rushed to the altar, where a priest was waiting. An elderly couple sitting in the back willingly agreeing to be their witnesses.
“We are here today in the sight of God, family and strangers to celebrate one of life's greatest moments.” The priest began. “We are here to give recognition to the beauty of love that is shared between Edmundo and Evan as they complete their family in holy matrimony.”
Buck glazed to where Maddie and Chris were seated on the front row. Chris was beaming and Maddie was drying away tears with a smile.
“Marriage is a contact not to be entered into lightly but thoughtfully and seriously and with a deep realization of the obligations and responsibilities. Marriage is the moment where your heart and souls are joined together for eternity.”
Buck stared at Eddie; they were both dressed in full millitary dress uniform. Buck had never seen Eddie in his uniform before and damn did he look handsome all dressed up. Definitely better than the few times Buck had seen him in a tuxedo.
“Let us pray. Heavenly father, we humbly bow before you today praising you, lord, and your son Jesus Christ. Lord, we ask you for your blessings upon Edmundo and Evan as we celebrate this momentous occasion in their lives. Grant them happiness and contentment as their two lives become one as they create a new family and explore the depths of their love for one another. Bless their family and their relationship which will support, strengthen and sustain them throughout their lives. Bless their home as a place of love and peace. Let them have a long and happy life together. In the name of Jesus Christ we pray, Amen.”
“The joining of two hearts as husbands is a commitment like no other. It offers opportunities for sharing and for personal growth that no other human relationship can equal. A husband and husband are each other’s best friends, confidantes, lovers, teachers, listeners, critics and safe harbors.”
“The bond between two husbands deepens and enriches every fact of life. Happiness is fuller and commitments are stronger. Marriage also encourages new experiences and finds new ways of expressing love through the ups and downs of life.” Buck and Eddie were both fighting against their tears at this point.
“Edmundo and Evan as your journey begins as husbands; I would ask you both to remember to always treat each other with respect and remind yourself often of what brought you here today.”
“Edmundo Rafael Diaz, do you take Evan Montgomery Buckley to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, to love, honor and cherish in sickness and health forsaking all others for as long as you both shall live?”
“I do.” They were both crying now.
“Evan Montgomery Buckley, do you take Edmundo Rafael Diaz to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, to love, honor and cherish in sickness and health forsaking all others for as long as you both shall live?”
“I do.”
“We may now bring out the rings.” Chris – with a little help from Maddie – stood up and walked over to them. A black box in hand.
“The ring, an unbroken circle representing unending love. As often as either of you look upon these rings, may you be reminded of this moment and the love you have promised one another.” The priest stopped for a moment. “Do you have your own vows, or do you want the standard?”
“Can I do a Celtic one?” Buck asked at the same time Eddie answered, “I’m going to improve the Hispanic version.”
The priest smiled at them. “Edmundo, you go first.”
Eddie accepted the black titanium ring Chris handed him. “I, Edmundo Rafael Diaz, love you, Evan Montgomery Buckley, as my husband and best friend, and I give myself to you, and I promise to be faithful to you in joy and in sorrow, in health and in sickness, the rest of all the days of my life. I take you to be my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part. I will have your back any day, forever. This is my solemn vow.” After sliding the ring on Bucks finger Eddie lifted the hand so he could kiss it.
“Evan, if you may,” the priest prompted after a couple moments where Buck stood silent, staring into Eddie's eyes.
“Oh, yeah,” Buck closed his eyes, taking a deep breath before opening them. “You cannot possess me, for I belong to myself, but while we both wish it, I give you that which is mine to give. You cannot command me, for I am a free person, but I shall serve you in those ways you require, and the honeycomb will taste sweeter coming from my hand. I pledge to you that yours will be the name I cry aloud in the night, and the eyes into which I smile in the morning. I pledge to you the first bite from my meat, and the first drink from my cup. I pledge to you my living and dying, equally in your care, and tell no strangers our grievances. This is my wedding vow to you. This is a marriage of equals.”
Buck accepted the white titanium ring Chris handed him but was shaking so much he had to try three times before he was able to get the ring on Eddie's finger. Maddie was laughing wetly in the background.
“Edmundo and Evan,” the priest began, “I want to wish you both much love and happiness as you begin your new journey. Remember to keep lots of laughter in your life, focus on the good things and love will never be far behind.”
“Edmundo and Evan, you have pledged your faith to each other in the company of your family and for strangers. By the power vested in me by God and the state of California, I now pronounce you husband and husband.”
“You may –“ Buck didn’t know which of them leaned in first but they were kissing before the priest was able to finish the sentence. “-now kiss.”
The priest wanted until they separated to end the ceremony. “Family, stranger, I am proud to present for the first time as husband and husband, Mr. and Mr. –“ He halted.
“Diaz” Buck informed the man with a beaming smile.
“Mr. and Mr. Diaz.”
“Congratulations!” Chris yelled, pulling them both into a hug.
“With all due respect Sirs, if you want to make it official today you have to sign the paperwork now, the town hall is closing soon.”
“Of course,” Eddie said, grabbing the pen offered. “Thank you for doing this on such short notice.”
“No need. Anything I can do to families of those who make sure everyone else is safe. You both repay what I could give you today every day, not to mention your adorable son. I am more than happy to be the one to wed you.”
“Thank you, we only do our best,” Buck said as he took the pen from Eddie signing the paper, including a name changing form. “So, how fast can I become a Diaz?”
“As soon as these are stamped at the town hall, but it probably takes some time to enforce it everywhere, like on your bank account, driving license and official papers. I know they email the finished papers to you, to make the process faster.”
“That’s amazing, I am going to have you change it for me,” Buck looked at Eddie and Maddie, “but it’s really great to officially be part of the Diaz family now.”
Eddie leaned in to kiss his husband. His Husband! “Come on, let’s give the nice priest free and find a place to eat before we have to take you back to base. Because someone has to be up early tomorrow, and someone else has school.” He looked down at Chris.
“Boooring.”
“Come on, I read about this great restaurant when we waited for you to arrive. My treat, no discussion.” Maddie informed them. Buck laughed and they all walked out of the small church.
They all piled into the two cars. Maddie – and Chris – driving in front of Eddie's car. Buck and Eddie simply followed Maddie’s car almost to the Mexican border.
They made it to what looked from the outside like any other ranch home. If you looked away from all the cars parked in front.
“Are you sure this is the right place?” Buck asked, confused, looking around.
“Yup.” Maddie popped the ‘p’. “Let’s walk inside.” Buck and Eddie sheared a confused look but followed Maddie and Chris when they headed for the door.
They were met by a middle-aged man dressed in a light blue suit. “Welcome to The Lucky Heaven. I am Trace, what can I do for you?”
Maddie sent the man a smile. “I have a reservation under Maddie Buckley. I talked to a Miranda on the phone.”
Buck and Eddie sheared another look. “Is there something we should know?” Eddie asked.
“Nothing to worry about, sirs. If you could come with me, your table would be this way.” Trace led them future down the corridor straight through what clearly was the dining area and up a spiraling staircase before opening the door to a balcony. A small round table was placed in the middle with three chairs around it, all of them facing a stunning view of the ocean.
“It’s only three chairs,” Buck commented, blinking at Trace.
“I am sitting inside. Chris can come join me if he becomes cold. The rest of us may not understand the risk of Bucks deployment as well as the two of you do, but we all know it is a chance he doesn’t return alive. The last thing I can do is give my brother and brother-in-law a fantastic wedding evening. I preordered your food so it should be done soon,” Maddie was the one that answered.
“The only thing I need are your preferred drinks. We have a wide variety of both alcohol and non-alcohol drinks. Maybe the young Mr. Diaz would prefer a soda?” Trace turned toward Chris, who in turn turned to Buck and Eddie. “Can I?”
“What about, none to the dinner, but you can get a glass with the dessert I’m sure aunt Maddie has asked for,” Buck answered, gaining a nod from Eddie.
“You can sit out here with me and Buck for dinner and join Maddie for dessert, so the two of you can leave before it becomes too late,” Eddie turned to Trace, “If it’s okay with you and the rest of the staff, of course.”
“That sounds like an excellent plan, we can’t let it be too late to the little Mr., can we?”
“And aunt Maddie has to answer people’s call for help tomorrow,” Chris said, completely serious.
“I am a 9-1-1 dispatcher,” Maddie explained when she saw Trace’s confused face. “Buck and Eddie are firefighters as well as serving in the millitary, almost everyone we hang out with are some kind of first responder.”
“Ah, a family of superheroes then. Thank you for your service in the armed forces and as a civilian.”
“Thank you,” Eddie gave him a sad smile. “I am driving, so any non-alcohol wine you have. Buck, do you want wine or whiskey?”
“I don’t really feel like drinking alcohol today. Any chance you make a pomegranate ginger fizz? Oh, and a strawberry honey soda to Chris, he loves them, just use sparkling water.”
“Our bar is well equipped for both cocktails and mocktails so I am sure our mixologist can make something to your liking. Mr. Diaz, are you sure you want to stick to the non-alcohol wine?”
“I aren’t as adventurous in my taste for drinks as Buck, but if you do have something to recommend, I could be persuaded to try something new.”
“What about a blueberry maple mojito? I personally think it will mix great with your main course.”
Eddie looked at Buck as he was the one with more experience in that field. Buck smiled, indicating he thought he should go with it. “Yeah, sure, let’s do that.”
“Great, I will be by with your drinks and food shortly. Ms. Buckley if you could follow me down.” Trace and Maddie walked away.
Buck and Eddie smiled at each other before getting Chris and themselves settled by the table. “So, what do you think Maddie has planned for us?” Buck asked.
“She is your sister; you should have a better guess than me. She didn’t exactly have a long time to prepare though, so it can’t be something that big.”
Christopher laughed, making Buck fake a gasp. “You know something!”
“It’s a happy secret. I pinky swore not to tell. But it’s gonna make dad less sad.”
“Has dad been sad since I had to leave?” Buck was careful not to look at Eddie, too afraid of what he may spot there.
“Yes, he has been so sad. Why can’t someone else leave instead of you?”
“Christopher,” Eddie tried to hide his emotions. “We talked about this. Buck didn’t choose to go back. He had to. It’s nothing anyone is able to change. Everyone has a unique set of things they can and right now the navy needs Buck’s. He has to make sure the rest comes home to their family. We all wish we could change it, but we have to do our best with what we can’t control. That may include me being sad, but that’s only … That’s only because I am afraid that he won’t return. That he will join your mom in the sky.”
“Ooooh, Eddie.” Buck stood up and wrapped Eddie in a hug, on hand resting on Chris’ shoulder.
The family stayed like that some moments until there was a knock on the door leading out to the balcony before Trace opened it with his elbow, balancing two trays.
“Forgive me for disturbing the moment, but your food is ready and it’s best to eat it warm.” He smiled as he scoped one of the trays into the table. “It was a pomegranate ginger fizz to Mr. Diaz, a strawberry honey soda to the younger Mr. Diaz and a blueberry maple mojito to the other Mr. Diaz.”
They were each given their correct drinks before Trace continued with the main course. “Two reindeer specials to Mr. and Mr. Diaz and a pasta chicken salad to the younger Mr. Diaz. The chief hopes you enjoy your food. Please send the young Mr. Diaz inside when you are ready for dessert.”
With that Trace grabbed the now empty trays and disappeared back into the building.
“Dad, Buck,” Christopher looked between them.
“Yeah, buddy. What is it?” Eddie asked.
“Now that you are married, does that mean Buck would move in with us, and be my dad for real from now on?”
“We haven't really discussed it yet, but we do want a future together.” Buck began interviewing his fingers with Eddie’s. “Maybe in a bigger house than you live in now, so we have a place to expand our family or have guests over. I would be happy with whatever you decide to see me as or call me. You can stick to Buck/Bucky if you want to, or you can call me dad/papa/pops or some other variation of the word ‘father’.”
Chris was clearly thinking about it, so the two adults started eating, eyes wide as they looked at each other. “This is good, Maddie hit the jackpot with this place.” Eddie commented.
“Yes, definitely. Makes me worry about how much money it’s going to cost her.”
“I got it,” Christopher announced, cutting off whatever Eddie was about to answer. “Dad will still be dad and Buck will be Daidí. Dad and Daidí. It fits together.” [Dad]
Buck coughed severely on a piece of meat. Eddie was immediately on his feet and moving next to Buck. “Are you ok? Please tell me you aren’t going to be in need of an emergency tracheostomy on our wedding day off all days, one is enough for a lifetime.”
Buck shook his head and reached for his drink but was cut off by a sharp ‘NO’ from both Eddie and Chris.
It took some time, but Buck was eventually able to get the piece of meat out from his throat and into a napkin, Eddie standing behind him watching concernedly and ready to step in and help at any moment.
“Sorry, I just … where did you learn that?” Buck stared at Christhopher with shock.
“Maddie taught me, she started teaching me and dad Irish after you left. She said that if we were becoming a family, we should know the basics.” The boy hesitated. “I don’t have to call you that if it makes you uncomfortable.”
“No! Of course I want you to call me Daidí if you are comfortable with it and wish to do it.” [Dad] Buck had tears in his eyes. “I was just really surprised you knew the world. I didn’t know you were learning the language.” Buck glared towards Eddie who had returned to his seat and his food seeing as his husband wasn’t currently on the brink of death.
“I was planning on making it a surprise, to surprise you when we were a bit more fluent. Doesn’t matter. It’s a part of you and it helps us grow closer to you and Maddie. To our family.”
“I – I … Thank you. Both of you.” Buck reached over and squeezed their hand.
“Eat, the sooner you get the dessert the sooner you get the surprise,” Christopher looked between his dads.
“Are you sure you can’t just tell us what it is?” Eddie raised an eyebrow.
Chris made a ‘nu-hu’ sound and put a full fork in his mouth making it impossible for him to talk. The two adults sheared a found smile before they returned to their own food, conversation flying between the three of them.
By the time the dinner was eaten it had become colder outside. Chris gave Buck and Eddie a long hug and told them in all seriousness: “I love you, and I’m going to miss you, Bucky, but you make each other very happy and if it is someone who deserves happiness it is the two of you. I know the mission is dangerous, I aren’t eight anymore, so take care of each other, okay?”
Both men nodded and pulled their son into a hug between them, tears running down their faces. After a long moment they separated, Buck pinky swore to call or text every day until he left the country and hugged Chris another time and left a kiss on his forehead before Chris went inside.
Instead of sitting down again Eddie and Buck stood by the railing watching the sun move towards the horizon.
They were put out of their little bubble as Trace returned with their dessert – lamingtons – new drinks and a small blue box.
“Young Mr. Diaz is seated together with his aunt and is enjoying the Tres Lences even if he insists his bisabuelas’ is better. You are free to stay here as long as you want to, if it is something big or small, just find one of the servers and they will accordance for your needs,” Trace informed them as he placed the items he was carrying into the table and turned on a small heating lamp above the table.
“Thank you, we really appreciate what you all are doing for us today,” Buck thanked the man before he disappeared inside.
“Do you want to open the gift or eat the dessert first?” Eddie asked as he looked over the box, unable to tell what was inside it without removing the lid.
“Maybe eat the cake first, to make sure we actually eat it, depending on what Maddie has got, I – we – may not be emotionally stable enough to eat it later,” Buck decided.
“I’m sure whatever it is it’s something good, Christopher said it was a happy surprise so it can’t be anything bad.” They both took their seat at the table.
“You know, the first time I ate lamingtons I told Maddie I wanted them at my wedding reception, I was probably Chris' age. Can’t believe she remembered and made sure we had it, even as late minute as this is.”
“Well, Maddie is a good sister. Of course she would remember.” Eddie took a bite of his cake. “Oh, this thing is good.”
Buck tasted his cake as well and let out an honest to God moan. “This is the best lamingtons I have ever eaten.”
They eat the dessert mostly in silence, simply enjoying the cake and each other’s company. Before long the cake was gone and the two of them were staring at the blue box in front of them.
“What do you think may be inside it?” Eddie asked.
“Why don’t we open it and see?” Buck answered. As he got a nod from Eddie, he carefully removed the lid and turned the box, letting the items inside land on the table between them. Inside was two black leather bracelets, a card and three memory sticks?
Picking up the card, Buck started reading it aloud. “To the best brother and brother-in-law anyone can wish for. I know this time and these circumstances are hard for the both of you, so I collected as many pictures for you as I was able to get on a short notice. (You may be given an actual picture book later),” Buck let out a wet laugh, “The blue one is mostly pictures of Buck, the black one is mostly pictures of Eddie and Chris, and the red one is mostly pictures of the two of you together as well as some with the rest of your family and friends. I believe you are able to figure out the bracelets by yourself.”
Eddie picked up one of the black bracelets and turned it around. He let out a surprised laugh as he spotted the engravement on the inside. “I think this one’s yours.” He handed the bracelet over to Buck with twinkling eyes.
Curious Buck took it. Spotting the letters he laughed as well. ‘You can have my back any day – Eddie’
“I think I know what is on the other one,” Picking up the other bracelet buck was proven right as he turned it to see ‘Or, you know, you could have mine – Buck’ written in the leather. Buck held it up to Eddie, letting the other man slip his hand through it before tying the end close. Eddie gently takes the other one from Buck and repeats the process.
With a bright smile Buck leaned into a kiss, trying to show Eddie how much he loves him.
Chapter 12: Next Phase, Taking a Stand and Singing
Chapter Text
It was late by the time Buck and Eddie returned to the base. Most of the base was bathed in darkness, but by the security check at the sentence did Maverick stay, clearly waiting. Eddie parked his cars in weeing distance from the entrance, but not in the way for others to exit or enter the base. Both men stepped out of the car, stepping around it to embrace each other.
“I can’t believe we are married; I don’t care about everything that happened earlier today, or why we did it so rushed. This is the best day in my life. No question,” Buck beamed up to Eddie.
Eddie didn’t answer right away, he leaned in and captured Bucks lips with his own in a passionate kiss. “I love you, and I wouldn’t change this for anything, not even knowing you are going to be safe. If you can be mine - even if it would just be a handful of days - it would all be worth it,” Eddie said as they separated.
“There is nothing more in the world I need, you, me, Chris, if i die, I wouldn’t regret anything. What you gave me today is more than I could ever dream about.”
Eddie kissed Buck again. Both men melting together. “You should leave, it’s too late already, plus I’m sure your, eh, captain, would want a world with you,” Eddie held Bucks head in his hands and kissed his birthmark. “Go on, I love you.”
Buck moved in for a last kiss. “Is tú mo bhuille croí,” [you are my heartbeat] with that Buck turned and walked toward the entrance of the base. Eddie watched him go, and didn’t go into the car before Buck had passed the security.
“So, I take it you just married Akita?” Maverick addressed Buck as they both watched Eddie drive away.
“Yes, I did. But as far as anyone here knows, I may as well have been married for years. It’s not like I can or want to wear the ring while in uniform, and none of you have really spent much time with me in civilian to notice,” Buck turned towards the older man. “I’m not hiding my relationship with Eddie, but I’m only here for the mission. None of you have proven yourself as friends, and really, I had left this life behind me. I have another life, a job, a family, friends to return to. No one is going to lessen my chance of that.”
Maverick blinked rapidly towards Buck, who shook his head. “Lisen, captain, if I want to make sure everyone survives this mission, there shouldn’t be anything unresolved between your men. Fix what you and Rooster have going on, and whatever is going on between Rooster and Hangman.”
With that Buck turned on his heels and walked away, ignoring Maverick calling after him.
***
Maverick was standing up on the podium, time to target -3:00:00 standing on the screen behind him. “Time is your greatest enemy,” he began with an almost sorrowful voice.
“Phase one of the mission will be a low-level ingress attack in two-plane teams. You’ll fly along this narrow canyon to your target.” He hit a button, and the screen turned into a schematic of the terrain. Buck silently counted the SAMs on it, 11 in that section. Was that correct? It had been some years since Buck had been in the valley, but wasn't it more? He remembered thinking it was stupid many of them.
“Radar-guided surface-to-air missiles defend the area. These SAMs, they’re lethal, but they were designed to protect the skies above, not the canyon below.”
“That’s because the enemy knows no one is insane enough to try and fly below them.” Rooster said with a flat tone. Buck had to stop himself from rolling his eyes.
“That’s exactly what I’m going to train you to do.” Maverick met everyone’s eyes, lingering a few seconds longer on Rooster.
“On the day, your altitude will be 100 feet, maximum.” Buck swore under his breath. He knew they were flying into the Akovot valley, but it hadn’t hit him that they were literally flying in to the valley and not you know right over it.
“You exceed this altitude … Radar will spot you and you’re dead.” The animation on the screen showed a plane crossing the orange line set up and immediately being shot down. Buck had to take in an audible breath, being shot down was something he didn’t wish on anyone.
“Your airspeed will be 660 knots. Minimum. Time to target: two and a half minutes.” The aviators looked at each other, bewildered by the information given to them.
“That’s because fifth-generation fighters wait at an air base nearby. In a head-to-head with these planes in your F-18s, you’re dead,” Maveric said low, facing the screen before turning around. Looking closer to the map Buck realized where they probably were heading. To where the dam used to be. The dam he had blown up, before being separated from his small team.
“That’s why you need to get in, hit the target and be gone before these planes even have a chance of catching you. This makes time your greatest adversary. You’ll fly a route in your nav system that simulates the canyon.” The captain's voice dropped. “The faster you navigate this canyon, the harder it will be to stay under the radar of these enemy SAMs. The tighter the turns, the more intensity the force of gravity on your body multiplies … compressing your lungs, forcing the blood from your brain. Impairing your judgment and reaction time.”
“So, for today’s lesson, we’re gonna take it easy on you.” His voice became lighter again. “Max ceiling: 300 feet. Time to target: three minutes. Good luck.”
The first one to try the course was Phoenix, Bob and Coyote. In a sharp turn Coyote ended up slowing down accidently forcing Phoenix who was following right behind him to pull up, crossing the barrier and leaving her and Bob in the path of the missile. Back on the ground they rejoined the others in the classroom.
“Why are they dead?” asked Maverick after they all looked through the flight data.
“We broke the 300-foot ceiling, and a SAM took us out.” Phoenix explained.
“No. Why are they dead?” their captain pressed, glancing at Coyote.
“I slowed down and didn’t give her a warning. It was my fault.” The man in question answered.
“Was there a reason you didn’t communicate with your team?”
“I was focusing on …” before Coyote could finish his sentient Maverick cut him off, gaze hard and voice cold. “One that their family will accept at the funeral.”
“None, sir.”
“Why didn’t you anticipate the turn?” he turned towards Phoenix. “You were briefed on the terrain.”
She stared at the floor, but before she had time to answer, their captain started talking again. “Don’t tell me. Tell his family.” He nodded towards Bob.
All the aviators could feel the heaviness of the situation. This was definitely going to be the hardest mission any of them have been on. Including Buck, as he knew failure wasn’t an option and he had to make sure the rest of the team selected returned home. He couldn’t live with the knowledge that he could have done more if one or several of them didn’t make it home, but he did.
The next one to try their luck was Buck and Hangman.
With the course marked on his navigation system Buck tried to visualize the actual valley, to remember every detail as he could. Silently promising to discreetly give his teammates all the inside information he could remember, increasing their change of survival.
Buck tried to follow Hangman as best as he could, but Hangman speeded up at a difficult path and Buck hadn’t flown this many turns since before he retired from active duty.
“Hangman, ease up. It’s about to get tighter.” Buck tried to warn him.
“Negative, America. Increase your speed.” Hangman’s voice filled his ears and Buck could see the man in front of him speed up.
“You’re going too fast, one of us is going to crash.” Buck informed him, struggling to keep up the speed in the difficult terrain.
“Well, no harm in being ahead of schedule.”
“Damn it, slow down! I can’t stay on course! I’m going to hit the bridge or the wall!” Buck yelled as they flew a particular hard curve. He crossed the invisible barrier of the wall trying to clear the bridge, alarms blaring “An ifreann, an raibh tú ag eitilt díreach tríd an droichead?” [The hell, did you just fly straight through the bridge?] Buck shook his head as he leveled his plane, turning the nose of his fighter jet back to the airstrip.
Back on the ground Buck grabbed a water bottle, starting to drink as their captain began asking questions again. “What happened?”
“I flew as fast as I could,” Hangman answered innocently, “Kind of like my ass depended on it.”
“And you put your team in danger, and your wingman’s dead,” Rooster butted in.
“He couldn’t keep up.” Hangman had a small but cocky smile. Buck didn’t like his attitude. Losing a wingman wasn’t a matter to take lightly, even if it only was in an exercise.
“Would you tell his son that?” Maverick asked him, deadly cold.
Buck couldn’t help the water sprouting out of his mouth and nose, going into a coughing fit. They all looked at him. “He isn’t … Chris isn’t legally mine.” Buck got out between the coughs. Halo – sitting next to him – patted him on the back.
“That doesn’t matter. Who old is he?”
“Nine.”
“So,” Maverick turned all his attention towards Hangman. “Would you tell a nine-year-old the reason their parent,” Buck coughed some more, “is death is because ‘he couldn’t keep up’ after they repeatedly told you to slow down?”
“NO! Of course not.”
Bucks phone vibrated in his pocket. He discreetly pulled it up to look at it. He had gotten a text from an unknown number. Frowning Buck opened it.
‘I noticed your slip up about a bridge. I’m making sure it’s been noted down before tomorrow. Warlock’
‘Thanx, I can give you the details when we are finished for the day.’
Buck looked up from his phone as Maverick announced that Rooster, Harvard and Yale were the next into the ring of fire.
Buck noted from the beginning that they keep their speed a bit too slow and if they didn’t increase it, they wouldn’t be able to make it to the target on time. Yale voiced the same concerns over the coms, but Rooster insisted that they shouldn’t go any faster. Sure, they may have made it the whole course, but they were well over the time limit as they hit the target.
Maverick started speaking as soon as the tree aviators sat down, beginning on his now familiar “Why are you dead?” As he didn’t get an immediate answer, he continued while facing Rooster. “You’re team leader up there. Why are you, why are your team dead?”
“Sir, he’s the only one who made it to the target,” Phoenix tried to defend him.
“A minute late,” the captain sighed, “He gave enemy aircraft time to shoot him down. He is dead.”
“You don’t know that,” Rooster tried.
“You’re not flying fast enough. You don’t have a second to waste.” Hangman said in an overly deadpan voice.
“We made it to the target,” Rooster glared up at Maverick. Buck realized this isn’t entirely about the mission. They were both looking for dominance, clearly part of their huge disagreement. Something was screeching between the two of them, and if they don’t get it cleared it could possibly complicate the mission and lower Bucks survival chance.
“And superior enemy aircraft intercepted you on your way out.” Maverick seemed on edge and angry. Buck didn’t like where this was going. Hoping for a miracle and that the two of them could just figure it out and move on.
“Then it’s a dogfight.”
“Against fifth-generation fighters.”
“Yeah. We’d still have a chance.” Buck wanted so much to add to the conversation and efficiently shout down both of them, but decided against it, hoping they could end the fighting – at last for now.
“In an F-18.”
“It’s not the plane, sir, it’s the pilot.” Rooster’s voice filled the hangar.
“Exactly!” the captain shouted as if he had won, and maybe he did. It did seem like he did have something against Rooster … flying?
The room fell completely qu- silent for several moments before Rooster spoke up, trying to hide his defeat. “There’s more than one way to fly this mission.”
“You really don’t get it.” Hangman was apparently not able to keep his mouth closed. “On this mission, a man flies like Maverick here, or a man does not come back. No offense intended.”
“Yet somehow you always manage.” Bob commented and Buck couldn’t help but frown. Was he Californian? How hadn’t he picked up on that accent before? He had known Bob for years, and he only now picked up on the man’s accent.?
“Look, I don’t mean to criticize. You’re conservative, that’s all.” Buck could see Maverick about to stop Hangman, but Buck decided to try it himself.
“Lieutenant Seresin.” His voice was sharp, and he could see Hangman hesitate before continuing on. Clearly, he couldn’t see a blinking warning sign right in front of him. “We’re going into combat, son, on a level no living pilot’s ever seen. Not even him. That’s no time to be thinking about the past.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Rooster turned towards Hangman. “Rooster,” Maverick tried but he was ignored.
Buck could almost taste the tension in the air. He knew that whatever was going on was about to explode. Buck just hoped they all could stomach the aftermath.
“I can’t be the only one that knows that Maverick flew with his old man.”
“That’s enough.” The man in question didn’t exactly seem fine with the topic at hand.
“Or that Maverick was flying when his old man …” Buck froze as he connected the dots in his head. He had heard a lot of stories about the captain after he flew with him years ago, including how he lost his R.I.O. in an accident back when he attended Top Gun. Said R.I.O. had to be Rooster's dad.
A fight broke loose between the two of them and several people stood up to try to separate them. Buck let them fight for a minute or two before stepping in. Standing in the middle, Buck didn’t flinch as a fit hit him in the shoulder. He simply grabbed it, stopping everyone in their move.
“You are all done for today. Everyone steps the fuck down and leave. If anyone wants to survive this mission you all must put everything behind you. This is about more than some personal guards. It’s about national security. I am not letting any of you back into training unless you have all left your issues behind.” Buck didn’t yell, but he did use his ‘don’t-fucking-try-to-question-my-authority’ voice he occasionally had to use towards his SEAL team. “That does include you, Mitchell.”
A silence fell over the group and the ones fighting stepped back. Hangman glared at him, but Buck glared right back with a cold emotionless face. The man ended up leaving, without even another look at Rooster and Maverick. The other followed suit, exiting the building.
Buck stood there a moment after everyone had left before heading to Warlock’s office. The admiral wasn’t there, so Buck grabbed a blank paper and a pen and noted down all the details about the bridge he could remember and some other information he thought would be important for the others to know.
Deciding to get some of the energy that was bussing under his skin, Buck grabbed some training clothes and a towel before heading towards the gym on base.
Hitting the weights and starting one of his usual training sets he did at the fire station when he had downtime (and energy). Buck connected his phone to the speaker close by since no one else was there and hit shuffle on his usual playlist.
He was working up a good sweat and was totally in the zone when a song he hadn’t heard in ages started playing. As it used to be his favorite when he served and used to sing it with his team as they worked out. Buck answered together with the people on the recording, repeating the line of the drill sergeant, but altering the answer to the branch to the version he had used with his men.
I saw the Taliban dressed in black
“I saw the Taliban dressed in black”
That's my E-tool in his back
“That's my E-tool in his back”
I was the one he did not see
“I was the one he did not see”
U.S. Army, Infantry
Woah, woah-oh woah-oh
“Woah, woah-oh woah-“
Woah, woah-oh woah-oh yeah
“Woah, woah-oh woah-oh yeah”
I saw the Taliban dressed in red
“I saw the Taliban dressed in red”
That's my bullet in his head
”That's my bullet in his head”
I was the one he did not hear
“I was the one he did not hear”
U.S. Army Engineer
“U.S. Navy Soldier”
Woah, woah-oh woah-oh-oh
“Woah, woah-oh woah-oh-oh”
Woah, woah-oh woah-oh-oh-oh oh yeah
“Woah, woah-oh woah-oh-oh-oh oh yeah”
I saw the Taliban dressed in brown
“I saw the Taliban dressed in brown”
It's me who shot him, to the ground
“It's me who shot him, to the ground”
I was the one he did not hear
“I was the one he did not hear”
U.S. Army Engineer
“U.S. Navy Soldier”
Woah, woah-oh woah-oh-oh
“Woah, woah-oh woah-oh-oh”
Woah, woah-oh woah-oh-oh-oh oh yeah
“Woah, woah-oh woah-oh-oh-oh oh yeah”
I saw the Taliban dressed in white
Now he's got me in his sight
He was the one I did not see
U.S. Army, Infantry
“Woah, woah-oh woah-oh-oh
“Woah, woah-oh woah-oh-oh”
Woah, woah-oh woah-oh-oh-oh oh yeah
“Woah, woah-oh woah-oh-oh-oh oh yeah”
As the next song came on, Buck sat down the equipment he was using and grabbed his water bottle. Taking a few big gulps of water before pouring the rest over his head Buck quickly emptied the rest of his bottle of water.
Turning around to start his last set, Buck spotted Payback, Hangman, Coyote, Fritz, and Omaha watching him from the doorway but decided to ignore them. They weren’t documenting it, distracting him, or getting into any kind of trouble so Buck let them be, pretending he didn’t notice they were watching.
If he started singing Radioactive when it started as the next song, it was no one’s business than his own.
Chapter 13: Dogfight Fotball, Irish and a Hostaged Sister
Chapter Text
Buck was nervous the next morning when he learned they would spend the day running around on the beach. He hadn’t worn shorts in so long he didn’t even remember when the last time was. His worst scars were coloring his feet, the worst scars higher up than his hip were mulctuary hidden by tattoos.
People had obviously seen his skin below his belly button, as recently as the episode on the beach and his last shift at the 118, but it was always in situations where you didn’t really pay any attention to peoples’ skin.
Buck was wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt, the rest of the aviators wearing some short sleeve tops and shorts. He was given some questionable looks in the beginning but no one – not even Hangman – commented on it.
Several rounds of dogfight football and a couple hours into the day, they were all warm and it seemed like the group collectively decided it was time to remove their shirts.
Buck drowned some water and though ‘fuck it’ and pulled his t-shirt off, throwing it next to his shoes, before carefully taking off his St. Christhoper medallion - now spotting the addition of his wedding ring - and laying it in on of his shoes as to not lose it. That left Bob and Halo as the only one of them with a top on. Pluss Hondo, but he was their refugee, not a player.
Even if the worst scars littering his upper body were covered with tattoos, it was enough of scars clearly visible from his tough life. His arms and abdominal muscles did however give him a little confidence boost.
“Holy fuck man!” Hangman shouted, staring at Buck’s left shoulder blade, or rather what was covering his shoulder blade. His SEAL tattoo. Taken right before his first deployment as tradition said (not that any of the 118 had known and questioned its existence, except Eddie). “You’re a fucking Navy SEAL?!”
That got the attention of everyone. Only Maverick had known he was a SEAL, and he had found out by seeing the same tattoo. Sure, the others had heard stories about his service time, but they didn’t include his position or rank, and only some of them mentioned he was special ops, as most known stories were about things he had done outside of missions.
“Yeah, I’m a navy SEAL, got the opportunity to try flying on a deployment, was a natural, got extensive training, and was sent to Top Gun. Even got to fly a mission alongside Maverick here once in the sandbox.” Buck shrugged, decided to give them a little information, without telling them what he did as a SEAL. They didn’t need to know what type of bullshit he had pulled, and exactly what he could do.
“You never told me you have flown with Maverick before,” Bob commented watching the two of them.
“It’s classified information, and it’s not like we exchanged much information in the short time we were airborne together,” Maverick told them. “Come on guys, let’s play a new round, score set to zero.”
Buck spent a moment wondering how much their captain actually knew about his service, definitely less than Warlock, but who much about what he did on deployments or what he had training in. Hondo, sitting on the side with the now empty scoreboard gave him an encouraging smile before Buck returned into the makeshift field.
It was – as all the previous rounds – utterly chaos. Two balls were always in the air, flying around, the wet sand with waves hitting their feet from time to time, and no exact borders where the field actually began and ended.
Penny – the woman that had been with Maverick the other day, and apparently the owner of the nearby bar – was sitting outside, keeping an eye on them and smiling as she worked on some papers.
The sun was slowly moving towards the horizon, when Maverick backed away from the game, sitting down on a chair further from the shoreline. By then they had been out there for hours, running and playing around.
Buck could feel his leg starting to act up and cramp. He regretted the run he had taken that morning. He couldn’t say he didn’t enjoy himself, but he should probably take it easy on his feet the next couple of days. Maybe even some painkillers before bed.
Sometime during the continued fight Hondo stepped in, playing with them instead of Maverick, and they may have shifted who was on which team, but they were all happy and enjoyed their break from flying. Clearly some of the tension from yesterday was gone, and that was all Buck could ask for.
After hours of running around they all eventually broke it up, and after being allowed to use the showers at the bar (why even had the bar showers, sure it was next to a beach but still) they all settled at the bar, the others ordering either beer or sodas as Buck looked over the bar’s whiskey selection.
“You really should get some single pot still whiskey, but I will take a drink of your Tullamore Drew Single Malt,” Buck eventually declared looking up at Penny.
“Our only Irish brand. The people coming to this bar normally don’t drink Whiskey, but if you plan on coming often, I can order a bottle for you.”
“Don’t bother, hopefully I won’t be here that long. I have a family to come home to,” Buck gave her a smile and deliberately flashed his wedding ring, now promptly placed on his finger, as he took the glass of whiskey.
“Oh, well I hope you make it home to your wife safely.” Penny commented as he paid.
“Husband, but yes-“ Buck was cut off by Phoenix shouting “America!” Across the bar.
“I better go,” Buck gave the woman a smile and headed towards the others, but not before noticing Maverick sliding down on the bar and striking up a conversation. Hmm, is it something between the two of them?
“Realy America, whiskey, what are you, Scottish?”
“Ní Albanach mé, go raibh mile maith agat,” [I’m not Scottish, thank you very much] Buck looked at Hangman with a bored expression.
“That language, you have spoken it twice before, what is it?” Halo asked, looking confused at Buck.
“It’s Irish, right? Didn’t your grandparents immigrate from Ireland during World War 2” Bob added.
“Not during, right before. But yeah, basically.”
Before someone could answer Buck's phone rang. Buck frowned. Eddie, the 118 and Maddie were all on shift and he had already texted with Chris earlier in the day.
Seeing a picture of Maddie eating ice cream on his screen Buck accepted the call, not even stepping away from the rest before he started talking.
“What’s going on, aren’t you on shift? Is someone hurt? Is Eddie and Christhoper okay? Are you and the baby? What about Athena, Bobby or Chimney or any of the other on the team?”
“Easy Buck, everything is fine, no one is hurt. And it’s all under control now. I just wanted to call and warn you about what happened today, so you don’t find out on the news or the internet.”
“Maddie, telling me it’s going to be on the news does NOT calm me down.” Buck was slightly shaking. “Just tell me what’s going on.”
“The dispatch center was taken hostage today-“
“WHAT?!!!” Everyone in the bar turned toward him.
“Evan-“
“You are telling me someone took the dispatch center hostage today?!”
“Yes, but-“
“Are they fucking stupid?! People could have died! What the hell do they get out of taking the 9-1-1 call center hostage except risking people’s life unnecessarily?”
“It’s okay, they wanted to do this robbery, but Chimney, Eddie and Athena figured it out and were able to get help before anyone was seriously hurt. Everyone is under control and taken care of.”
“And all of you are fine, no minor or hidden injuries? No one hurt you or my niece?”
“No. Faic. None of us. As I said, I only wanted to warn you about what happend, so you didn’t figure it out elsewhere and panicked. Listen, I have to go, officer want my statement, but we will talk later.” [Nothing]
“Okay. Okay, thanks for calling, I probably should go back to the others as well and finish my drink before heading back to base.”
“Stay safe Evan.”
“I’m trying, keep an eye on my boys.”
“For you, always.”
They hung up the call and Buck took in the bar, most people still watching him.
“Sorry about that, my sister was taken hostage at work today, but it is all fine. I just tend to freak out a little whenever things like that happens,” he addressed the room as a whole before taking a slip of his whiskey.
“Dude, what is your life?” Fanboy asked.
“Occasional hazard, it’s just normally the firefighters or the cop that is in hostage situations, not dispatch.”
The aviators shared confused looks, but they decided to not question him anymore, starting up a conversation while Buck sat in silence drinking and texting Eddie and Athena for more details, and to make sure they really were fine.
Chapter 14: Desission, Miracels and Training
Chapter Text
The next morning Buck swallowed another set of painkillers before walking over to their classroom. They all settled down in what had become their usual seats. Warlock stepped up to the podium.
“Good morning,” he started, no sign that he actually meant it. He did send Buck a sad mile before continuing. “The uranium enrichment plant that is your target will be operational earlier than expected. Raw uranium will be delivered to the plant in ten days’ time. As a result, your mission has been moved up one week in order to avoid contaminating the target valley with radiation.”
Buck let the news sink in. He had potentially just lost a week of his rapidly shortening life. It was a big chance he only had about a week and half left to live. He didn’t know what to do with that information.
Buck took in the map on the screen, studying every detail he could. The fabric was set underground, in the dead center of what used to be the reservoir of the dam Buck had blown up several years ago. He needed to know as much as possible and make sure the data given to his fellow teammates was as correct as possible.
“Sir, no one here has successfully flown a low-level course,” Coyote commented.
“Nevertheless, you’ve been ordered to move on.” Warlock turned towards Maverick. “Captain.”
The two of them switched places. “We have one week left to focus on phrase two. It’s the most difficult stage of the mission. It’s a pop-up strike with a steep drive, requiring nothing less than two consecutive miracles.”
Buck took in a deep breath. The word miracle used in describing a mission was never a good sign. He had been on enough high-stake missions in his military career to know that when someone used ‘miracle’ to describe a mission they believed not all of them were returning home. And TWO ! Everyone saw this as a suicide mission.
Buck knew the consequences if they failed, but he had to believe that he had a chance of returning home to Eddie and Chris. To see his family and friends again. Buck didn’t want the people unfortunate enough to fly the mission together with him to die. The last thing he could do was to fight for them to return to safety.
“Two pairs of F-18s will fly in a welded wing formation.” Maverick started explaining. “Teamwork. Precise coordination of these aircraft is essential to both the mission’s success and your survival. As you know, the plant rest between two mountains.” A map of their target
Buck, who had studied the map of their target and its surroundings, spoke up. “Sir, something isn’t right.” He got the attention of everyone in the room. They were all confusion, suspicion, startled or a combination.
“The mountain closest to the implant – the one to the west – seems … partly constructed.” Buck explained, trying to inform them about the hidden bunker-base without exposing that he has extended knowledge about the area.
“And why do you say that, Lieutenant Buckley?” The admiral - who Buck wasn’t familiar with - asked challenging. Buck only knew his name – Beau Simpson – and his callsign – Cyclone.
“Firstly, vice admiral Simpson, if you are going to use a rank on me, you better be using the right one. Secondly, Buckley isn’t even my last name, so you did get none of that right. Thirdly, do you really expect me to answer when you give me that attitude?” Buck scoffed toward the man in question.
Everyone was staring at him. “Then what is your rank and name?”
“It’s chief special warfare operator Diaz.” One – Buck didn’t pay attention to which one – of his teammates gasped and Warlock's eyes opened comically large. Definitely by the fact that he now knew he and Eddie had gotten married in the close past.
“On the matter of the mountain,” Buck continued, not letting anyone speak up as he stared down Cyclone, daring him to protest. “I have extended training to recognize areas and buildings that aren't as they first appear to be. That mountain has two parts that are too symmetrical to be natural. Knowledge like that has saved mine and others' lives more times than I can remember.”
Buck wanted to turn and look at the shock furthering everyone’s face, but he didn’t dare move it from the admiral. They all seemed to need a moment collecting themselves. Warlock was the one who eventually spoke up.
“You will all stay wary of that mountain during your mission. We can’t risk failure by simply ignoring potentially important information. Captain if you could continue.”
Maverick shook his head and breathed deeply a couple of times before continuing the presentation as if nothing had happened. “On final approach, you’ll invent directly into a steep drive. This allows you to maintain the lowest possible altitude and the only possible attack angle. Your target is an impact point less than three meters wide. The two-seat aircraft will paint the target with a laser's bull’s-eye. The first pair will breach the reactor by dropping a laser-guided bomb on an exposed ventilation hatch. This will create an opening for the second pair. That’s miracle number one.”
He took a small break, holding up one finger before finishing. “The second team will deliver the kill shot … and destroy the target. That’s miracle number two.”
He held up another finger as the animation on the screen showed the explanation. “If either team misses the target … the mission is a failure. Egress is a steep high-G climb out to avoid hitting this mountain.”
“A steep climb at that speed, you’re pulling at least eight G’s,” Hangman commented as he watched the data.
“Nine, minimum.” Maverick corrected.
“The stress limit on the F-18’s airframe is 7.5,” Rooster reminded them all.
“That’s the accepted limit,” their captain looked at all and every one of the team in turn. “To survive this mission, you’ll pull beyond that, even if it means bending your airframe.” Spotting Cyclone's reaction Buck realized that the admiral at last didn’t think any of them was going to survive the mission.
It only set fire to Buck's decision. He was going to fly the mission, and he was going to make sure everyone else made it home. He would save the others and then he was going to fight teeth and nails to return to his husband and their son . If nothing else to prove to the vice admiral that they weren’t expendable, any of them. Expressly Buck himself.
“You’ll be pulling so hard, you’ll weigh close to 2’000 pounds, your skull crushing your spine…” Maverick continued. “Your lungs imploding like an elephant’s sitting on your chest, fighting with everything you have just to keep from blacking out. And this is where you’ll be at your most vulnerable. This is Coffin Corner.” Buck detects a slight hint of fear in his voice. At last their captain doesn’t want them to die, Buck though sadly.
“Assuming you avoid crashing into this mountain, you’ll climb up into every radar while losing all of your airspeed. Within seconds, you’ll be fired upon by enemy SAMs. You’ve all faced sustained G’s before, but this … This is gonna take you and your aircraft to the breaking point.” The aura in the classroom was dark and macabre. This really didn’t look good.
“Sir,” Buck said, slowly granting the attention to everyone in the room. “That means we are dealing with three consecutive miracles.”
“Three?” all colors disappeared from Maverick’s face. As far as Buck knew there have never been a mission where it has been said they needed three miracles.
“One, Hitting the ventilation shaft. Two, delivering the kill shoot. Three, returning home. Sir.” Buck counted on his fingers, eyes not moving from their captain, nor was he blinking.
Maverick swallow. “That will come down to the pilot in the box.”
***
The next days were used to train on the whole operation, but mainly phrase two. Maverick flew as their enemy. They constantly changed who flew with whom to find the best combination.
They had a little setback when Coyote was stuck in G-LOC, and only minutes later Phoenix and Bob had to eject because of a bird strike setting their engine on fire. Buck was happy no one was seriously hurt by it, but they were all three held overnight at the hospital for observation.
It did send Buck spiraling about whoever or not he could make sure everyone survived the mission.
Chapter 15: Funeral, the Husband and Shopping for Terrorists
Chapter Text
Buck was surprised to hear that admiral Kazansky died, but as they all gathered for the funeral in their dress uniforms, he was honored to attend the funeral. Standing in attention as someone folded the flag lying on the coffin and giving it to the admirals’ wife, Buck had to fight back tears. It could be Eddie that was given that flag in a little over a week’s time.
The crew from Top Gun was standing in front watching their captain as he stepped forwards and removed his aviation badge from his uniform and hit it into the coffin before saluting the dead man.
Buck knew they had attended Top Gun together like 30 years ago. As hard as it was on him – feeling what it could just as well have been his own funeral – Maverick had just lost his friend. It had to be harder on him.
After the standard shots and trumpet playing, four fighter jets flew over the people gathering in a formation. Only after they had passed did Maverick stand down and moved to the side as someone started lowering the admiral’s body into the ground.
As the funeral came to an end and people started mingling around and talking, several strangers walked up to Buck and thanked him for his service. Confused Buck turned towards Hondo who was standing close by. “Why are complete strangers thanking me, and why only me ?”
“Probably something to do with that metal on your chest,” Hondo sounded almost amused.
Buck glared down to his chest confused as to why people were thanking him. The only thing metal on it was the medallion and wedding ring that was hidden under his clothes, the buttons and his medals. Including the highest award any serving member could get. “My medal of honor,” Buck looked genuinely surprised when Hondo nodded.
“Your medal of honor.”
“How did you get it anyway? Did you save an admirals life or something?” Hangman asked, suddenly at Bucks side with several of their team.
“No, I was assumed KIA when I was a POW, so I had to blow up some shit and make my own way to safety.”
Everyone blinked at him. Surprised.
“I’m going to buy all your drinks tonight,” Hangman declared but Buck shook his head. “I’m heading to LA, to stay the night with my family as we have been given tomorrow off. It may be the last time I see them.”
“Apologize and give this to your husband,” Warlock said as he walked towards him, followed by one of Buck’s old commanders, Steve McGarret.
“Snoop Dog! What are you doing here?” Buck swiftly put the envelope Warlock was holding out into one of his pockets before he hugged his former CO.
“I’m paying respect to a death admiral. If I at the same time got to actually get some information about how my favorite team leader is doing, well it's catching two flies at once isn’t it?”
Steve looked Buck up and down before continuing. “I heard you recently married that grunt of yours.”
“He isn’t just any grunt but yeah, I did,” Buck beamed as he pulled out Eddie's medallion and showed the onlookers the ring he had placed on it.
Steve grabbed the medallion and turned it over revealing the engraving Shannon had ordered years ago ‘make it home to our Christhopher’. “When you mention he was a combat medic you didn’t mention where. He didn’t so happen to mostly work on green beret and ranger bases, did he?”
“That’s classified information, sir,” a familiar voice said behind him.
“Eddie!” Buck turned around and sprinted the couple feet to his husband wrapping him up in a bear hug.
“Hi cariño, ready to go home?” [sweetheart] Eddie asked after giving him a short chase kiss.
“My bag is in Phoenix’s car, but as soon as I have it we can leave. Still can’t believe you drove all the way down here. I could have gotten home safely by myself.”
“Of course I did, and I know you could. I would do everything for you, picking you up from a funeral is nothing. Well, I wouldn’t have hurt Christopher, but you would rather die than put him through pain,” Eddie was looking at him with a fond expression.
Steve drew the attention towards himself as he let out a soft ‘ oh ’. “He is-“ Steve didn’t finish the sentence, but Maverick nodded. “Yes, he is.”
“They are the ideal to every power couple ever to exsist.” Warlock commented.
“Is it something the rest of us don’t know about America's husband that maybe we should?” Bob asked the higher-ranking officers in front of him.
“No, not really,” Eddie answered with a shrug.
Maverick snorted. “Akita, you literally have a navy cross without ever serving in the navy or the marine corps or even the coast guard. That isn’t exactly standard.”
“Wait, you have a navy cross along with your distinguished service cross?” Buck asked, looking at his husband in confusion. “How did I not notice that at our wedding?”
“You was probably bussy looking elsewhere or crying. I only have it because I refused the medal of honor after saving a company of marines, so they decided to give me a navy cross instead, it’s not a big deal, and nothing I can share with you anyway.”
“Wait, I could have refused the political piece of scrap metal??” Buck turned away from Eddie and stared down his former commander.
“No, you couldn’t. It was too late by the time you woke up anyway. Nothing to be done when the whole process was over and accepted.”
“You tricked me!” Buck walked towards Steve, pointing a finger toward him.
“Yes, because you deserve the recognition and status that comes with it. It’s not like you would have accepted it any other way,” Steve pulled his ‘tired dad’ face and blinked.
“This is insane,” someone – probably Fanboy – mumbled in the background.
“Yeah, I can’t believe that America is married to fucking Akita ,” Helo agreed.
“Hey! No one is fucking my husband,” Buck glared at his teammates.
“No because-“ Buck smacked his hand into Eddie’s mouth before he could complete the sentence.
Before any argument could start Warlock stepped in, “Now, I do believe you have a son to come home to. Akita, America got a letter for you, read it. Stay safe and enjoy your time together.”
“Christopher,” Buck beamed as he removed his hand from Eddie.
“Yeah,” Eddie smiled one of his softest smiles back. “Let’s go home.”
The two of them quickly said goodbye to the rest of the people, got Buck’s bag and headed into Eddie’s car.
After hitting the road Eddie turned toward Buck, “Can you read that letter for me?”
“I’m not actually sure I’m supposed to know what it is about.”
Eddie scrunched up his nose. “Like I would ever hide something from you, expressly right now. It’s probably about your mission.”
Buck didn’t answer but he pulled up the envelope and opened it. Carefully he slowly opened it unfolding the page only to be met with handwriting.
“ Diaz, we were able to get your message to your old contact. They told our operator that this probably would get them killed, but it was going to be worth it. That you need to know. Several hours later a bloody message appeared with your full name written on it in one of our military command centers in the area. No one have any idea as to how it came inn.
The message didn’t tell us anything, but maybe you would understand. If it is information important to the mission, please share the information with me and SoD Caleb Logan.
Take care of yourself and your son, we are all praying your husband will survive.
- Rear Admiral Bates”
“What contact is Warlock talking about and what information are you searching for?” Buck asked after finishing reading the letter out loud.
“At the end of my conversation with him – when he told me the truth about your mission – I asked him if he and Logan could get a message to an old information of me overseas. I needed to know what would happen if something went wrong.”
“Eddie…”
The slightly older man swallowed auditory. “Can you please read the message from Xi, I will explain it afterwards.”
Buck flipped the sheet of paper to the other side and looked over it. “This is some kind of a shopping list. Is it … Is it the buyers?”
Eddie stopped at a red light and glared over to Buck and squeezed a hand on his knee for a moment. “Yes, I have to know whom we may be dealing with in the long run. Both if it is a failure but also if it is a success.”
“I am going to need you to translate as I go down the list,” Buck stared into Eddie's eyes.
A car behind then honked and Eddie had to tear his eyes away from Buck. The light in front of them was green. “I can translate the organizations, for the numbers I have to do math, but generally a bigger number means more money or products ordered.” Eddie started driving again.
“So high numbers mean bigger threat, got it,” Buck glared down at the list again. “It’s twelve byers.”
Eddie hummed, showing he was paying attention.
“4835 kg rusty nails 9-5-2,” Buck ratted off the first name on the list. Eddie immediately swore in Spanish. “The Revolutionary Struggle.”
“983 clay pots 2-6-4.” “ISIS.”
“783 bouquets of hortensia 7-4-2.” “Al-Qa’ida.”
Buck snorted. “How do these codes make any sense?”
“It doesn’t. That’s the point. You have to know to be able to understand.”
“745 black checkbooks 3-5-3.” “New People’s Army – Philippines.”
“668 used toothpicks 6-4-7.” “Hamas.”
“332 shoelaces 3-5-6.” “Hizbul Mujahideen.”
“Kashmir, right?” Buck looked up from the list for a moment. Spotting the concentrated face of Eddie while he drove made him smile. “Yes, and Jammu.”
“98 black plastic forks 2-2-2.” “The fuck?!”
“Who is black plastic fork?” Buck was starting to sweat. He knew it was probably going to be some of the world’s worst organizations but still. This definitely didn’t look good. “Khmer Rouge,” the words were barely a whisper.
“CPK was disbanded in 1999.” Buck could hear his husband take in a deep breath. “Yeah, I don’t know either.” It was silent for a long time, both of them letting the information settle.
Buck eventually continued down the list. “76 packs of peanuts 3-3-2.” “Boko Haram.”
“56 feet hidden zipper 3-4-3.” “Asbat al-Ansar.”
“54 purple sharpies 1-1-8.” “Segunda Marquetalia.”
“43 empty puddles 7-1-9.” Buck could see how Eddie froze up in the corner of his eyes.
“Can you repeat that?” Eddie asked breathlessly. “43 empty puddles 7-1-9.”
“That’s – that is not a terror organization. That is the country of Albania.”
Buck leaned backwards and groaned, closing his eyes for a moment. “Like the government of Albania?” “Yes, definitely the government. What’s the last name on the list?”
“34 rolls of scotch tape 5-5-1.” “Okay, that’s Hizballah.”
None of the two men seemed to want to discuss what they just had learned, and they sat in silence almost half an hour before Eddie spooked up.
“I can translate the money used when we are home, but I don’t really think it’s necessary. I don’t actually know the numbers behind the organizations though.”
“It's a threat assessment. How dangerous or angry they are going to be if something falls through.”
Eddie pulled out of the road and into a mostly empty parking lot. He swiftly stepped out of the car, not caring to turn off the engine. Buck scrawled to follow.
They meet in the front of the car, in a bone crushing hug. Eddie was crying, and Buck felt like he couldn’t hold the other man close enough.
“You have to succeed, even if you have to Kamikaze bomb the damn thing with your plane.” Eddie tried to pull away, but Buck didn’t let him.
“The chance of me surviving this mission only seems to be getting smaller and smaller,” Buck started, pressing a kiss to Eddie's temple. “But I have to do this, I have to make sure it’s a success. No one else can. No one else has the knowledge of the terrain to improvise if need be.”
“I know, I so painfully knows. It’s nothing anyone can do something about. I’m just selfish and don’t want to lose you.” Eddie's voice was clearly unsteady.
Buck moved his hands from where they were embracing Eddie to cup his face. Slowly he leaned into an impossible sweet, sweet , kiss.
“I know we were supposed to hang out with the others today, but do you think we can send them home? We have time to hang out with them tomorrow, today I only want to be as close to you as humanly possible. It may be the last time, and I want everything with you if it so happens to only be once.”
Eddie didn’t answer right away, but he did pull out his phone. Quickly he tapped out a message before turning his screen to Buck showing him the message, Athena's name on the top of the screen.
‘Hi ‘Thena, I’m sorry, but the mission is worse than we thought. Me and Buck are going to need some time to decompress, can you send everyone home? We promise to show up tomorrow, but we’re going to need some time alone.’
Buck hit the send button before looking back at Eddie. “Can we stop for food on the way home?”
Eddie let out a wet laugh Buck could feel more than heard by their close proxy. “Yes, we can stop at the Italian place outside the city, should be 40 minutes or so.”
“Perfect their Tagliatelle al ragù is so good,” Buck was about to nestle into Eddie again when Eddie’s phone vibrated. Pulling it up he tilted the phone so both of them could read it.
‘I’m making sure you come home to an empty house, stay safe and take care of each other. We love you both.’
After reading the message the two men stood together holding each other for what felt like forever before they eventually separated, both of them hungry.
Buck and Eddie made it to the restaurant and enjoyed the food before making it back to the completely empty Diaz home.
None of them paid any attention to the boxes that sat neatly in the living room with all of Buck's personal items – it was not like he was going to ever return to the loft, so he had Maddie and Hen arrange it to be sold – as they made their way to the bedroom. A trail of clothes was left behind as neither of them wanted anything between them.
Chapter 16: Change in the Mission and Orders not Followed
Chapter Text
Buck spent the next day with his friends and family in Los Angeles but never swayed too far away from Eddie and Christhoper. The mood was dampened, and they all knew that this had a real chance of being the last time they spent together. Buck and Eddie didn’t go into detail, but they did inform the others that the chance of Buck survival didn’t seem to high.
Buck talked to all of them, played with the children, made dinner together with Bobby and drank wine with Hen, Karen and Maddie. Casually calling Eddie his husband at any and all opportunity he could to the amusement to everyone else.
They spend hours telling stories from their lives, both new and old. By the time Buck had to leave they were all crying and hugging. The last thing he did before going into Athena's car – as she was the only one that didn’t have work tomorrow and demanded to be the one to drive Buck back – was to kiss Chris and Eddie goodbye, lingering as long as she let him.
Like last time Eddie stood in attention as Athena’s car pulled away, knowing he probably wouldn’t see his husband again. Eddie would have collapsed on the ground when the car disappeared from his line of sight if Bobby hadn’t been there to physically catch him as his world crumbled around him.
***
Buck looked confused around the classroom as he couldn’t see Maverick. He wasn’t alone as all his teammates seemed confused and/or worried. Clearly, whatever was going on, none of them was informed or had any clue about what was going on. So it wasn’t something they had been informed about while he was in LA.
As soon as the clock hit whole, Cyclone started talking. “Captain Mitchell is no longer your instructor. And as of today, there are new mission parameters.” Buck glared at Warlock, silently asking for an explanation. He had said there weren't any other options if the mission was to succeed, so how could they change the parameters now? Expressly since it was so close to start.
Warlock gave him a tight smile and nodded towards the observational data. Indicating that something was going to happen, without warning everyone else. Buck frowned but nodded back.
“Time to target is now four minutes.” The clock on the screen changed as Cyclone spoke. “You’ll be entering the valley level at reduced speed. Not to exceed 420 knots.”
The aviations looked between each other. Bob was the one to voice their concern. “Sir, won’t we be giving their planes time to intercept?”
“Well, lieutenant, you have a fighting chance against enemy aircraft. What are the odds of surviving a head-on collision with a mountain?” Cyclone looked at them daring someone to speak up, daring someone to question him. Buck decided to take the bait.
“It’s surprisingly high. Averaging about 68%, which is a better chance than facing fifth-generation fighter jets and several SAMs at a reduced speed. Lowering our maximum speed will ensure that no one is going to return alive. I don’t know what kind of training you had to become an admiral, but in the SEAL s, they are taught that no human is expendable, and that survival is the key to success. If no one come home the mission is a failure, and then those lives are on you. Personal."
Cyclone turned to Warlock for support but instead Warlock raised an eyebrow. “I’m not going against an E-7 SEAL in a discussion about mission survival. I’m sure he must have seen more shit out there than the rest of us combined.”
Cyclone was about to say something towards Buck when the monitor started beeping, showing an incoming F-18 to their training course setup. “Who the hell is that?” Cyclone asked, looking at the screen.
“Maverick to range control. Entering point Alpha. Confirm green range.” Maverick’s voice came through the speaker system.
“Uh, Maverick, range control, uh, green range is confirmed.” The operator was clearly unsure. “I don’t see an event scheduled for you, sir.”
Everyone sat up in their chairs, following the flight data intensely. Buck glanced at Warlock and spotted a hidden smile. He had known Maverick was going to do something like this, to prove the mission was doable.
“Well, I’m going anyway.”
“Nice,” Phoenix mumbled.
“Setting time to target: two minutes fifteen seconds,” Maverick continued.
“2:15? That’s impossible,” Coyote commented.
“Final attack point. Maverick’s inbound.”
Buck was pretty sure he didn’t blink or breathe as he watched Maverick’s flight. He had to pick up any and all details making sure everything seemed right and to see exactly how Mavrick pulled all and every turn, plus he was extremely worried. Buck was vibrating in his seat, not that anyone paid him any attention, too busy observing the flight. If Maverick failed, they would have to fly the mission on Cyclones permissions – and then someone would die, never to return to American soil again. Buck knew that was including but hopefully limited to himself.
Buck couldn’t tear his eyes from the flight data to look at the others. Too desperate to know however whether or not Mavrick would succeed.
Luckily for all of them, by some small miracle, Maverick was able to make it through the narrow valley at an intense speed. “Popping in three, two, one.” He flew upwards over the imagined hill before turning downwards pointing towards the target.
“Bombs away.” He said as he turned upwards, increasing G-force until he hit 10.
The bomb hit its intended target with 16 milliseconds to spear. Making Rooster shout “Bull’s-eye! Holy shit!” as several of the aviators stood up, celebrating.
Buck could hear Hangman’s shocked ‘Damn’ as he eyed the G-number. Damn indeed, 10.0 G was not exactly kids play.
***
It hadn’t been a shock when Maverick told them he had been named mission leader and that he would have to fly the mission. He literally proved it wasn’t impossible, of course they wanted someone who could pull it through as a leader. It would be suicide not to.
The last two days before they had to leave was spent more in the air than not. They were constantly training and polishing their ability. Either flying the course or dogfighting.
In the little downtime they had Buck was either eating, sleeping or on the phone with the people he had left in LA, not caring if the rest of his teammates could hear him or not, it wasn’t like it mattered soon anyway. He could be dead in a few days.
The last day they spent the evening together at the Hard Deck drinking. To his surprise Penny had taken up a bottle of single pot still whiskey the moment he stepped into the bar and made sure he always had something in his glass. When he tried to pay at the end of the night, she refused payment and told him to make sure they came home if he was selected. Like that wasn’t the plan right away. He thanked her profoundly and asked her to look after Maverick.
Chapter 17: Bambi, Seacrets and Panic
Chapter Text
Before he stepped aboard the USS Theodore Roosevelt the next morning Buck took a moment to take in every detail he could from his homeland. Digging his fingers into the dirt next to the payment as Maverick walked up to him.
“America.” Buck nodded indicating he heard the captain. “Are you okay, you have seemed worse to wear since the funeral.”
“I realized it just as well could have been mine. The chance to survive the mission isn't in my favor.” Buck turned, staring inland, getting a glimpse of Maverick quizzical expression.
“America as much as I shouldn’t tell you this, I’m gonna. You are an amazing aviator, but I’m not going to choose you for the mission, not when I’m going to fly it.”
Buck turned to the older man and gave him a sad smile. “That doesn’t change anything.” He walked toward the aircraft carrier, leaving a confused Maverick behind. They had approximately 26 hours before take-off. 26 hours before the fate of the world was in the hands of him and six others.
Buck headed directly for his cabin and used the day to mentally prepare himself. If he wasn’t in the right mindset when the mission started, then he was going to slip up and it was going to cost him his life. He had to do this, the mission had to succeed. He didn’t have the opportunity to back away, the faith of the worlds relative peace was on his shoulders.
***
Buck did emerge when it was time for dinner and after getting his food he sat down with the rest of his teammates. Finding an empty chair and moving it in between Bob and Rooster.
None of them asked him where he had been the whole day, nor were they discussing the mission or their family, clearly they picked up something was going on with him. It was all unimportant chatter around him and Buck let it wash over him, glad for the distraction they were creating, clearly intentional, but still apprished.
Buck was almost finished with his food when someone behind him yelled “BAMBI!”
Turning around, Buck spotted Puma, a SEAL who had temporarily been attached to the same team as Buck for a while on his first deployment. They had run into each other from time to time afterward when he was still serving. They hadn't instantly been friendly, fighting for the same spot as both were demolition experts, but they had eventually grown into a great friendship.
Buck stood up in time before the shorter man crashed into him with the picture image of a ‘bro hug’. “Fuck Bambi, we didn’t even think you would ever walk after watching you on national news and here you are back in uniform and everything.”
Buck saw the others at the table shift confused but decided to ignore them. They would know by the time his funeral came around anyway. “Sorry about that, I probably should have reached out to everyone from my days in the navy and informed them I was doing fine, but I wasn’t thinking about it. Contacting people you haven’t talked with in a couple years wasn’t my first priority.”
Puma gave Buck a small smile. “I totally understand, it's not like any of us blame you. It’s impressive you got out of it with all limbs and no hiccups.”
“Well… almost,” Buck hesitated but desidet he didn’t have anything to lose anymore. “I may have had a pulmonary embolism and throw up blood on my captain’s patio because I had an allergic reaction to the cobalt-screws they used to set my leg, but I’m all fine now.” Buck informed the SEAL with a sheepish expression.
“So … you are telling me you are currently being sent on what most people with even the smallest information call suicide deployment not even a year after you was trapped under a fucking firetruck because of a stupid kid with an IED, that you afterwards suffered a pulmonary embolism and knowing your luck probably ended up in that tsunami one way or another.”
Everyone in the mess hall was staring at him now, but it was not like Buck could deny it. He shrugged, “Yeah, I was at the pier with Chris when the wave hit. Been to the hospital a couple of times after that too. Almost sued my boss, but Booth was able to talk me out of it. Just typical stuff.”
“Realy,” Puma raised an eyebrow and shook his head, “Only you Bambi. Only you.”
They hugged another time before Puma turned and left to get some food. Sitting down at the table everyone was watching him.
“Puma and I are friends from way back – become friends at my second tour maybe – and yes I was the firefighter trapped under that ladder truck in LA, it’s not a big deal.” Buck addressed them all, speaking so loudly that the people listening in from the surrounding table also clearly got it.
Hangman was the one to speak up. “It’s a big deal, but the more we learn about you, the more we release you don’t … You aren’t the standard.”
Buck frowned. “I can’t tell if you mean that as a compliment or not?”
Hangman didn’t have the opportunity to answer as Warlock suddenly was next to them. “America, sir, it’s your husband.”
Buck froze. Eddie and the rest of the 118 were currently on a 38-hour shift. They would still be on the clock when he took off tomorrow.
“What’s going on with my husband?”
Warlock looked at him in silence a moment before shoveling a tablet in front of him. Buck recognized Taylor Kelly as the news reporter standing in the rain with the familiar ladder truck of the 118 in the background.
Seeing the news was set to approximately ten minutes ago Buck frowned and hit the play button. Taylors voice immediately began flouting out of the tablet’s speaker.
“For those that are just joining us, we are following the brave firefighters from the 118 as they try to rescue a six-year-old stuck 45 feet down in some drainpipes. Both firefighters Diaz and Han are currently down there with the kid after the former cut his access-line.” Buck frown deepened. Why would Eddie do something so stupid. He had to make it home to Christopher. They couldn’t both leave him.
The camera changed, showing a crane and a protected hole most of the 118 and Athena standing around working. Taylor continued to talk in the background, but Buck was fixated on watching everything going on at the scene. He knew someone was coming up by the movement of the line Bobby and Stover was handling before Taylor catches on to it.
“It seems to be some movement by the tunnel that’s been drilled and hopefully we will see someone coming up to the surface soon.”
Chimney does infect appear around a minute later holding a child tightly.
“It’s firefighter Han and the little kid,” Buck could hear the relief in Taylors voice.
Hen immediately went for the kid and started checking the boy over, following standard procedures. Chimney was swiftly released from the safety line, and they were preparing to lower it again – definitely to get Eddie up – while Taylor went on about how lucky the boy was and how good the firefighters were when lightning hit the crane.
Buck’s world stopped spinning, and it was thrown upside down. Disoriented and wrong, wrong, WRONG .
He screamed.
A deep gut-wrenching scream.
The tablet showed in good quality video what was happening at the scene. The crane toppled over, and his husband became trapped in about 30 feet of mud as the tunnel he was deep inside collapsed. Buck would have hit the ground if he hadn’t been sitting in a chair.
“We don’t know if he is alive or not,” Warlock commented softly next to him when his screams eventually died down. “We- We p-promised to ha-have each other’s b-b-backs and I – I … I wasn’t there to save him.” Buck gasped out.
There was movement and talking on the tablet, but Buck couldn’t focus on what they were doing. He couldn’t look at it, either. It was the only way to figure out whether Eddie was alive or not.
Buck was shaking badly, and his heart was pounding in his chest, his palms were sweaty, and he couldn’t focus on the people around him. Shakenly he slowly fast forwards the news ending on the live feed. It seems that they were arguing about how to find Eddie, but they weren't doing anything. Why weren’t they doing anything??
“They h-has to do something. He- he is trapped under there,” relation hit Buck like a trainwreck, and it hurt – hurt way more than being trapped under the ladder truck did, “I didn’t – I didn’t – didn’t tell him …” Buck cut himself off with a loud sob. He had to – had to tell Eddie – tell his husband that he – that he loved him. He had never said it out loud. Not in those words. And now – now it could be too late. He didn’t know if his husband was alive or not, and even if he was – Buck had a high chance of being dead in 24 hours.
Someone – someone touched Buck’s shoulder lightly and he didn’t think, he just reacted, throwing whoever that was down to the floor without moving his eyes from the tablet.
Buck thought he may have heard swearing, but he didn’t pay it any attention. He was stuck on a fucking aircraft carrier and his husband was dying, and it was absolutely nothing he could do other than watch on a stupid tablet.
The camera had moved back on Tayler, but Buck was trying to pick up all and everything that was happening in her background. Athena, Bobby, Chimney and Hen were just standing together. Holding around each other. Not doing anything. Why weren’t they digging for Eddie or trying to find another entrance point? Why were they only standing there?
“They have to do something. They must. They can’t just stand there. He- he could by dying right this second and- and they are doing nothing.”
Buck wanted to scream and curl into a tight ball and never uncurl again, but mostly – mostly he wanted to be there on the scene and dig Eddie up himself. With his bare hand if he had to. The only thing he did do was to grab around the tablet hard and slightly rock back and forth.
Buck knew he was mumbling to himself in an incoherent mess of mostly English and Irish but also spanish and every other language he spoke. Not even he himself was aware what exactly he was saying, not that it mattered. Nothing really mattered if Eddie was dead, and he was about to die and there was no happy ending.
Christopher.
Christhoper would be devastated. So devastated if he lost even one of them, but both…
At last, he would be taken care of, he was going to stay in LA with his friends and some of his family and that was the best scenario Buck could hope for. He and Eddie had agreed that if something happened to both of them, then Bobby and Athena would get custody. If they couldn’t then Chris would go to Maddie and Chimney, if not Hen and Karen. If all others somehow couldn’t, he would end up with Peppa. He would be taken care of, and that’s what was important.
As devastating as everything was, as hopeless as the situation seemed, it was not like it was going to change what he had to do in the morning. The nuclear bomb fabric had to be stopped, whatever it took, whoever it took.
The camera on the tablet changed again showing the arrival of new personnel and Buck saw Bobby's face. It was businesslike and Buck knew – he knew Bobby was going to treat it like a recovery mission and that he didn’t think Eddie was alive. But they had to. They had to.
They. Had. To. Have. Hope.
Alive until proved otherwise.
It hadn’t happened often, but Buck had watched soldiers returning almost untouched from seemingly the most impossible of situations. Buck wasn’t sure how he was feeling anymore. He didn’t know if Eddie was alive or not. He wanted to believe he was alive, but it would maybe be better if he didn’t. Then he didn’t have to face Buck most likely dying.
The people on the screen were clearly planning something and it looked like one of the unfamiliar people was giving orders and setting things into motion. Buck wondered if they would make it in time with who much unnecessary time they were spending. By this point Eddie probably had the time to save himself.
Minutes were ticking by and everything in Buck was going highwire as he was stuck in limbo with uncleanly. Tayler was still talking but not a single word was registered in Bucks brain.
More people were pulling in and they were now splitting up in groups clearly about to start searching when everything became soundless, and a hand came in front of the camera lens. The camera moved in the direction the hand was pointing.
Buck let the happiness that was bubbling in his chest out with a wet laugh as he watched a drenching wet and clearly unsteady Eddie make his way through the bushes and towards the first responded gathered around. He must have said something because everyone turned toward Eddie. Chimney, Hen and Bobby were with him almost immediately while Athena and John were making sure they had some space, so that his husband wasn’t crowded.
Buck wasn’t completely sure if he let out another scream or not when he realized he had to call and tell Eddie he loved him. He was searching for his phone, but why couldn’t he find that damn thing? Where was it?
Someone pressed his phone into his hand without Buck having to ask. He didn’t know who it was, but he was forever grateful. As Athena was set as his emergency number, he didn’t even unlock the phone before calling her.
On the tablet he could see Athena frown and pick up her phone, face going wild as looked at the screen. The call was accepted barely a second before he could see her hit the screen of her phone.
“Hi, sweetheart.” Athena's voice was soft, but Buck didn’t have time for this. “I need to tell him I love him.” Buck could hear his own desperation. He didn’t care. Whatever got him in contact with Eddie the fastest.
Athena's head snapped up in confusion moving around until she spotted the news camera. “ Oh. You have watched the whole thing, haven’t you?”
“Athena,” Buck whined, too desperate to explain. He could see Eddie fighting with his consciousness.
“Hey! It’s okay. It’s okay. I’m going to –“ Buck cut her off when he saw she was kneeling in front of his husband. “Eddie! Eds, Eds, Eds.”
“Evan!” Eddie's voice was weak and horse, but it was some of the most beautiful things Buck had ever heard.
“I love you. I love you. I love you. Te amo. I- You could have died , and I realistically speaking probably are in 24 hours, and I couldn’t – I couldn’t … you have to know I love you. You must know I love you.” [I love you.] Buck didn’t think he had ever been this desperate, but he NEEDED Eddie to know. Know how much he loved him.
“I know. I know.” Eddie repeated it over and over trying to suit Buck the best he could over the phone. “Tá grá agam duit.” [I love you.]
Buck completely broke. He was screaming, laughing, shaking but most of all he was crying. The world was literary dancing in front of his eyes and Buck was remotely aware that he was hyperventilating. With the little breath he had Buck was stuttering out love confessions in any and all languages he could.
His world was spinning again, and everything was back to the way it should. Not really, he was still most likely going to die tomorrow, but that … that didn’t matter. Eddie was alive.
The tablet wasn’t in his hands anymore, but Buck wasn’t aware when it had disappeared. The adrenaline that had flooded his blood since he started watching seemed to have stopped working and together with the lightness in his head, he knew he was about to crash. He didn’t care.
A new thought crossed his mind. Christopher just had a big scare, he could have lost his dad today, and he could lose his other tomorrow. “Ifreann.” [Hell.]
“Evan?” Eddie sounded worried but so tired.
“I – Christhoper,” Buck gasped out. “You may not have died today but you could have, and me tomorrow …” He couldn’t complete the sentence.
“It’s okay. He will understand. You still have a job to do. I know the risk, but I also know the consequences. You have to do it. You have to make sure it is a success.”
Buck was silent, unable to set words on his thoughts. Christopher and Eddie may understand, but they didn’t deserve it.
“I love you. We will talk tomorrow morning before you head out okay?” His husband's voice cut through when Buck stayed silent for too long.
“Yeah. Yes. I love you.”
Eddie – or maybe it was Athena – hung up the phone and Buck sat there for several minutes before he lowered the phone and looked around. The mess hall is empty except for his team, Maverick and Warlock.
“I – I should sleep,” Buck declared as he started to feel extremely emotional and physically tired. He tried to stand up, but as soon as he was standing the world turned on its axis. It clearly didn’t help that they were on a boat.
Rooster was there on one side and Coyote on the other. Together they throw one arm over each of them and hold more or less the entire weight of Buck between them.
“Come on America, we are going to help you get into bed,” Rooster said softly. Buck still flinched; the voice was closer to his ear than he had thought.
Buck mumbled ‘go raibh maith agat,’ [Thank you.] as they started moving. By some miracle they made it to Buck's luggage in record time – or maybe Buck dissociated on the way over – he wasn’t sure.
Between the three of them, they were able to get Buck changed into his nightgown – a hoodie, sweatpants and fluffy socks, Buck always became cold when he was sleepy and or sleeping – and into his bed. He was out like a light before Coyote and Rooster made it out of his room.
Chapter 18: Video Calls, Mission Brief and Last Texts
Chapter Text
Buck’s whole body was aching when he woke up. He more literally than figuratively rolled out of bed and landed on the floor with a little thump.
Digging through his bag, Buck found his pain medicine and popped two of them in his mount before grabbing the water bottle on his nightstand and swallowing them down.
His phone hit the floor before he was able to pick it up and unlock it. He had dozens of texts and a couple calls, but a short glance at the time showed him that he only had about an hour and a half until the mission started. Buck decided not to take time to read all the messages so instead he called his husband on facetime.
Eddie didn’t answer immediately so Buck stripped down to his boxer and was about to pull on his flight uniform when Spanish swearing filled the room.
“EDDIE!” Buck turned back to his phone, picking it up. “How are you? Are you ok?”
“Buck,” Eddie's face was burning hot. “Could you please put on some clothes? I’m not alone, and even if I was, we don’t have time or opportunity for anything. Mission start is in 83 minutes.”
“Sorry,” Buck gave him a sheepish smile before getting dressed. “You didn’t immediately answer so I thought I had time to change.”
“Is it safe?” Buck could hear Maddie off camera.
“Maddie! Yes, it should be safe now.”
“Hi, Evan.” Maddie appeared on Eddie’s left side. “Are you ready for the big day?”
Buck shook his head. “No, but I know the consequences if the mission fails, and I can’t let it be the future for Christopher and my niece.” Eddie turned to Maddie.
“You’re pregnant??”
“We didn’t find out until about a week before Buck left. He’s the only one we have told. We don’t know the gender yet, but we did decide to keep it on the low until everything about the deployment was over and calmed down,” Maddie explained to Eddie.
It was a knock on Buck's door. “America, are you awake?”
“One moment,” Buck muted his phone and laid it down on his bed. Buck opened the door and met by not only Bob, but with all of his teammates including Maverick and Puma.
“Oh, Ehm, what are you all doing here?” Buck looked between them all.
“We wanted to check on you. Yesterday was a hard day.” Bob spoke up. “Also, the mess is closing soon, so you have to get down there to eat,” Puma added.
Buck checked his watch. “Yeah, food is good.”
Buck turned around and walked to his bed. Picking up his phone he unmuted it.
“Eds, I have to eat but I will call you again when I’m done.”
“That’s fine. You have to eat. Also, Christopher is on his way to the hospital, so you probably get to say goodbye to him as well,” Eddie gave Buck a reassuring smile before hanging up.
“Come on Bambi,” Puma gently pushed Buck forward, getting him to walk towards the mess hall.
***
As soon as his breakfast was eaten, and he was in a less used part of the aircraft carrier Buck pulled up his phone. The facetime call was answered immediately.
“Hi Eddie. You know you didn’t actually tell me how you were doing earlier today.”
“I’m fine, only mild hypothermia and some bruised ribs. Athena said you watched it happening over the news,” there was a sad softness to Eddie he rarely let anyone see, it was on full display now.
“Not all, but most of it, yes. I kind of lost it. You couldn’t die. Not when I have a real chance of being dead in an hour. I don’t have a choice; I have to make sure this is a success. We both know the consequences if it goes wrong.”
“Yes, we do. Something is more important than our family and my and Christophers happiness. You can’t let the ‘grocery list’ be completed. If that costs your life, then that is something we are willing to live with.”
Buck was crying. He didn’t want to die; he wanted a life with Eddie and Chris – maybe even someone more – he wanted to grow old with his husband. But he knew – he knew he didn’t have a choice. That no one else could take his place. That the faith of survival was on his shoulders, alone. And what a burden that was.
“If I live or die, I think I’m ready for a legacy,” Buck swallowed, but didn’t hesitate. “No human can live up to a legend, but however direction this ends in, it could start a war. They need hope. They need a hero.”
Eddie looked at him a long time before nodding. “They do. I will make sure you are remembered, dead or alive.”
Buck looked at the time. “Fuck, I don’t have long. Didn’t you say Chris was there?”
“Yeah. He is in the gift shop with Maddie picking up something to cheer me up. Athena and Bobby are outside. I could get them so you could say goodbye to them all.”
“Please.”
***
They all stood in parade rest awaiting the official start of the mission. Maverick took the spot in front of them. “It has been an honor flying with you,” he began, “Each one of you represents the best of the best. This is a very specific mission. My choice is a reflection of that and nothing more.”
“Choose your two foxtrot teams,” Cyclone ordered, standing a little behind and a few feet to the right of Maverick.
“Payback and Fanboy.” He looked at them, before moving his gaze, stopping a moment on Buck before continuing. “Phoenix and Bob.”
“And your wingman,” Cyclone continued, seemingly happy by the choice.
“Rooster.” The answer came quickly, making the man mentioned frown.
“America, as much as you don’t deserve this, do you know your part?” Warlock asked, standing on Maverick’s left. His words draw everyone's attention towards Buck, making all the other officers and most of the other people attending frown in confusion.
“Success with or without death, sir.”
Warlock looked at him sadly. “You know the risk better than anyone else, failure is not an option. Fight to survive, your family needs you. Your husband and your son need you to return alive. Now more than ever.”
Buck grabbed the St. Christopher medallion and wedding ring around his neck and nodded.
“The rest of you will stand by on the carrier for any reserve role that’s required. Dismissed.” Warlock informed them.
The rest of them started moving around but Buck was frozen in his spot, toying with Eddie’s medallion. “America,” Maverick walked up to him.
“I have to do this. I know the consequences of failure, and what will happen if this doesn’t work out. As devastating as my death is going to be to my family and friends, at last they would be a lot safer,” Buck defended himself.
“This is why you were being so sad after the funeral. Why you said my choice didn’t matter.” It wasn’t a question; it was a statement.
“Yes,” Buck agreed. “Hinc itur ad astra.” [From here the way leads to the stars.] With that, he turned around and walked away.
***
Standing in front of the whole crew of the aircraft carrier Warlock gave them the mission brief. “Your target is a clear and present threat. A secret uranium enrichment site under rogue state control. It’s an underground bunker, tucked between these two mountains. Your route of ingress is heavily defended by surface-to-air missiles backed up by fifth-generations fighters.”
“Once your F-18 strike team crosses the border, tomahawk missiles from USS Leyte Gulf will launch a synchronized strike on the enemy’s airfield here.” He pointed at the map that was shown on the large screen behind him. “This will knock out their runway. But you’ll have to contend with any planes already in the air. The moment these tomahawks hit; the enemy will know you’re coming.”
“Your time to target will be two minutes and 30 seconds. Any longer than that, and you will be exposed to any aircraft the tomahawks may have missed.”
“This is what you’ve all been trained for,” Cyclone spoke up. “Come home safely.” Buck rolled his eyes; the admiral still didn’t believe they would all survive. He was only trying to hold up a mask so as to not be blamed for it if they died.
As everyone stepped back making the last preparations, Buck pulled up his phone. He first entered the ‘118 with family’ chat tapping out a short message.
‘This is it; this could be my end. I need you all to know how grateful I am for you all. I wouldn’t be the same person without all of you, so thank you. Words can’t describe how much you all mean to me. Keep an eye on Eddie and Maddie for me. I am sorry if it ends like this.’
Buck then immediately pulled up his private chat with Eddie taking a deep breath and texted ‘Tá mé sáite i ngrá leat, I love you, Te amo. Please be strong, I will fight for you and Christoper, always' [I love you with all my heart] [I love you] before turning off his phone and handing it over to Warlock.
Buck disappeared to suit up in his full flying gear before the admiral – or anyone else for that matter – got the chance to say anything.
Chapter 19: Successes and or Death
Chapter Text
Buck took a moment to inspect his plane properly before climbing inside, locking the cockpit. He clung to the St. Christopher medallion and the wedding ring hanging on it while he waited for the ground crew to finish their last preparations. Buck made a silent promise to make sure everyone else made it home and to never give up, to constantly fight to be able to see Eddie and Chirs one more time.
Taking a deep breath Buck let go of the medallion, carefully putting it under his clothes. He closed his eyes and completely switched the mental switch he had promised to never go near ever again after he lost most of his old team.
The switch was switched.
It was no way back.
This was it.
...
As soon as they were cleaned for takeoff Maverick's voice dragged Buck’s consciousness to the world around him, but Buck was emotionless. Deadly. Unreachable. “Dagger one, up and ready on catapult one.”
“Dagger spare standing by,” Hangman called next. Buck gave his fighter jet a once over before declaring “Dagger five, up and ready.”
“Dagger four, up and ready.” “Dagger three, up and ready.” Payback and Phoenix followed suit.
“Dagger two, up and ready,” Rooster ended the chain.
“Support assets airborne,” a technician called. “Strike package ready. Standing by for lunch decision.”
Maverick was the first in the air, followed by Rooster, Phoenix and Bob, Payback and Fanboy, before Buck was the last one to take to the air. They could all feel the surreal state that came with a high-stakes mission.
“Comanche, dagger one. Standby check-in,” Maverick voiced as soon as they were flying in formation, heading towards their target.
“Comanche one-one, set. Picture clean. Recommend dagger continue,” a female voice answered him.
“Copy. Daggers descending below radar,” their captain commanded.
As they descended Buck glanced over as best he could to the others. This was success and-or death and they all could feel the precure. Knowing they may fly into their death.
“Daggers now below radar. Switching to E-2 picture,” they were informed.
“Here we go. Enemy territory up ahead. Feet dry in 60 seconds. Comanche, dagger one. Picture,” something calmly neutral came over Maverick and Buck realized he didn’t care if he survived the day or not. And that, that was both terrifying and helping at the same time. He wasn’t the only person that had switched a possible unswitchable switch.
Buck had been in countless situations like that before, where you didn’t know if you made it home or not. He didn’t think he ever had had such a big wish to return, but he knew he couldn’t watch anyone else die. Not to mention failing the mission. It was not an option.
Eddie may not like it, but he knew Buck and he wouldn’t hold it against him. He knew that if it stood between Buck's survival and someone he cared about (or any decent human, or in this case thousands or millions of lives, or even the existence of all humankind if they were really unlucky) he would always put others' survival before his own.
“Comanche. Picture clean. Decision is yours,” the woman from before answered.
“Copy.” Buck took what had the potential to be his last deep breath waiting for the signal. “Dagger attack.” This was it. No going back.
“Tomahawks airborne,” someone informed.
“Tá sé anois nó riamh,” [It is now or never] Buck commented as the missiles passed over them.
“Daggers, assume attack formation,” as soon as the commando was given, Buck slightly slowed down, letting the others find their position and line up in front of him as he made up the rear end.
“Daggers set. Proceeding to target. Two minutes and 30 seconds in three, two, one. Mark,” Maverick informed the technicians. He is followed by “Two Mark.”, “Three. Mark.” and “Four Mark.”
“Five Mark,” Buck called out as he hit the watch starting the timer. Two and a half minutes and this would all be a failure or a success. Two and a half minutes and it had to be a success. Failure wasn’t an option. He would rather die to ensure that the mission was successful than live with the consequences of them failing.
“Going in,” Maverick informed as he entered the Akovot valley.
If they weren’t in such a hurry and he didn’t have a bunch of bad memories from it, Buck probably would have said it was a beautiful place, perfect for a hike, but he had bad memories from it and was busy looking for possible trouble.
“First SAM site overhead,” Maverick called out.
“Looks like we’re clear on radar, Mav,” Phoenix said.
“Don’t take that for granted,” Buck remembered them. They couldn’t trust anything anymore.
“More SAMs! Three o’clock high!” Rooster informed them as he spotted two high upon the hillside.
“We got two minutes to target,” Bob called out.
“Copy,” Fanboy answered. “We’re a few seconds behind Rooster. We got to move.”
“Thirty seconds to tomahawk impact on enemy airstrip,” someone back at the aircraft carrier informed them.
“Dagger, Comanche. We’re picking up two bandits. Single group, two contacts,” the woman said.
“Comanche, what’s their heading?” Phoenix sounded worried.
“Bullseye 09, 050, tacked southwest.” Okay, so not an immediate problem, but could be as they returned.
“They’re headed away from us. They don’t know we’re here,” Rooster voiced.
“The second those tomahawks hit the air base; those bandits are gonna move to defend the target. We have to get there before they do. Increase speed,” Maverick called out.
“We got you, Mav. Don’t wait for me,” Phoenix answered immediately.
Buck spotted several new SAMs from the last time he was in the valley. He realized there was no way all of them were going to be able to make it out, at least one of them was going to be shot down. No way all of them was making it back to the aircraft carrier. Witch meant he was going down with his plane one way or another.
“Sir, daggers two, four, and five are behind schedule. Time to target, one minute 20,” however was on the other side didn’t falter, even if they too had to feel the pressure of the mission.
“Tomahawk impact in three, two, one. Impact. Enemy runway is destroyed,” another person took over.
“Bandits are switching course to defend the target,” the woman informed them.
“Rooster, where are you?” Maverick could almost hide his worry. Almost.
“Come on, Rooster. Bandits inbound. We have to make up time now. You can do this.” Buck tried to motivate the man. Knowing their - especially his own - best chance of surviving was with Rooster hitting his target.
Maverick’s “Heads up, Phoenix” was followed by Bob’s “Whoa!” Buck guessed they just crossed the bridge.
“Sir, bandits are two minutes from target. Daggers are one minute from target.” The woman’s voice rang through Buck's concentration.
“Guys, we’re falling behind. We really gotta move” Fanboy said, followed by Paybacks “If we don’t increase our speed, right now, those bandits are gonna be waiting for us when we reach the target.” Buck didn’t know what was going through Rooster's mind at that moment, but he hoped he could snap out of it immediately. They were losing important seconds. He also knew that that was something Rooster had to do himself.
Buck could hear both Rooster and Maverick mumble something without picking up what they said - too busy cataloging what he could do if the second bomb didn’t hit its target - before Rooster accelerated quickly.
“Jesus, Rooster, not that fast!” Payback yelled as he speeded up following the fighter jet in front of him as closely as possible. Buck followed behind, keeping some distance between him and the rest. Ready to offer himself as collateral if it meant the other completed the mission.
“That’s it, kid, that’s it,” Maverick mumbled.
“All right, let’s go,” Rooster said as he turned, flying through the valley with increased speed.
“Damn, Rooster, take it easy,” Fanboy commented.
“No, we want to be as close to the others as possible,” Buck corrected him.
“Sir, dagger two is reengaging,” some technician informed them.
“Thirty seconds to target. Bob, check your laser.”
“Air-to-ground check complete. Laser code verified, 1-6-8-8. Laser is a go!”
“Watch your heads.” Rooster called as he flew in between the supporting pillows on the bridge.
“Oh, shit! Shit!” Buck could hear Fanboy as he watched them fly between two of the bridge’s pillars.
“Copy that, I’m right behind” Buck called back, making sure they knew he was behind them. Buck was completely relying on instinct he hadn’t used in years. Turning and changing his speed and altitude without thinking.
“Payback, you with me?” Rooster asked. He was answered with a “Right behind you.”
“Phoenix, stand by for pop-up strike,” Maverick cut in.
“Dagger three in position,” Phoenix answered.
“Popping in three, two, one.” Buck could hear their heavy breathing through the coms.
“Get me eyes on that target, Bob.”
“Dagger three. Stand by, Mav.”
“Come on, Bob, come on.”
“Stand by.”
“I’ve got it. Captured!”
“Target acquired. Bombs away.”
“We’ve got impact! Check, direct hit! Direct hit!” Bob shouted.
“Dagger two, status.” Maverick asked.
“Almost there, Mav. Almost there.” Rooster informed as they turned the hill into the target. “Fanboy, where’s my laser?”
“Rooster!” Fanboy yelled. “There is something wrong with this laser! Shit! Deadeye! Deadeye! Deadeye!”
“Come on, guys, we’re running out of time. Get it online,” Maverick sounded stressed.
“Dagger five standing by for Kilo-Bravo,” Buck informed, slowing his speed rapidly, his comment seemed to go over the heads of others as they continued to stress. Not paying any attention to him. Buck however was completely calm, if he died, at last he did it to save so many people. Eddie and Chris were alive, safe, and together. He had had the opportunity to be an actual family with them. He wouldn’t die with any regret. His life could end here.
“I’m trying! I’m trying!” “Come on, Fanboy!” “Nearly there! Nearly there!” “Come on Fanboy, get it online.”
“There’s no time.” Rooster’s voice was clear against the panic. “I’m dropping blind.”
“Rooster, I got this! I got this!”
“No time. Pull up.”
“Rooster, wait!”
“Bombs away! Bombs away!”
Buck watched as two bombs did in fact disappear into the ground and didn’t explode at the ground.
“It’s a hit! It’s a hit! Pulling up,” Buck informed them, changing his speed to absolute max and turning the nose of his jet upwards. Not caring that he was pressing the plane to more than it was designed to endure.
“IFREAN!!” [HELL] Buck shouted as the ground exploded sending shockwaves of force and smoke up in the air, making it harder to control his plane. He also kept the G-force counting in the corner of his eye watching as the number grew higher.
“Bullseye! Bullseye! Bullseye!” Someone – Phoenix maybe – called over the come.
The shockwave of the explosion shook Buck’s plane hard, knocking him out of course for a moment before he was able to stabilize himself. Barley clearing the mountainside.
The mission may have been a success, but the worst was yet to come, they had to make it home. Home to their families. Home to his son and husband.
“We’re not out of this yet,” Maverick informed them, not that any of the aviators could have forgotten, but Buck thought it may be angled towards the people on the aircraft carrier. It didn’t matter anyway; this was now purely survive or die.
“Here it comes. Radar warning! Smoke in the air. Phoenix, break right.” Okay, so now they were officially being shot at. They were under fire.
“Emergency jettison. Dagger three defending.” “Here comes another one!”
“Dagger one defending. Rooster, status.” Their captain called out as the second duo passed the top of the mountain disappearing from Buck's view.
“Oh, my god. Smoke in the air! Smoke in the air!” Buck listened with horror as what sounded like FOUR SAMs ejaculated and headed towards Rooster.
“Break right, Payback! Break right!” “Breaking right”
“Oh, my God! Here they come!” That was definitely Fanboy.
“SAM on your six, Rooster!”
“Deploying countermeasures. Negative contact.”
“Smoke in the air. Breaking right.” Buck informed as he turned over the mountain top, a SAM on his tail almost immediately. He turned, narrowly shooting down the SAM on his own.
“Dagger one defending.”
“Talk to me, Bob.”
“Break right, Phoenix! Break right!”
“Mav! Nine o’clock! Nine o’clock!”
Everything was utterly chaotic as more and more missiles were launched. Buck did his best to keep an eye on his team in front of him as he took down as many of them as he could. “Rooster, two more on your six.”
“Dagger two, defending.”
“America, SAM on your nose.” Maverick warned him.
“Dagger five defending.” Buck called back.
“Rooster, tally, seven o’clock!”
“Talk to me, Bob!”
“On our six!”
“Dagger two defending.”
“There are more SAMs up ahead, be prepared,” Buck called as he destroyed yet another missile.
“Phoenix, break right!”
“I see it! I see it!”
“Rooster!” Buck shouted as two more SAMs headed towards him.
“Dagger two defending.” “Shit, I’m out of flares!”
“Rooster, evade, evade!” Maverick sounded worried.
“I can’t shake ’em! They’re on me! They’re on me!”
“Stay steady! I have them!” Buck yelled. Escalating before he rolled and invented his fighter jet. Hitting his own flares as he stayed upside down over Roosters plane.
By pure luck, Buck was able to hit both of the SAMs making them explode. Leveling his plane again, they all continued the flight out towards the ocean. Fighting some more SAMs before coming to an area it didn’t seem like there were any more SAMs. For the moment at last. Buck did however know there were more SAMs closer to the shore. He looked over his data and noticed something seemed to be wrong with his engine, they seemed to not give full power anymore.
Looking closer at his data, Buck noticed that his fuel level was drastically dropping, he had to have a leak somewhere. Eying the information carefully Buck was about to inform the others when he was cut off. “Comanche. Bandits inbound. Single group, hot. Recommend dagger flow south. One minute to intercept.” The woman informed them.
“All daggers flow to ECP. You have bandits headed for you.” Buck started calculating with the constant drop of fuel if he was able to make it to the aircraft carrier, but with how fast it was leaking he couldn’t. He wouldn’t even make it out to sea.
He wouldn’t make it back to safety. He was going down one way or another. Differently while being on fire. Well, if he was to go down in a burning inferno, at last he could bring as many flames with him as possible. Trying to clean a path of safety for the others. What were some explosions when you were already a five-alarm fire?
“Dagger spare request permission to launch and fly air cover.” Hangman’s voice surprised Buck.
“Negative, spare.”
“Dagger, you are not to engage. Repeat, do not engage.”
“Dagger one, return to the carrier. Acknowledge.”
“Acknowledge.”
“Dagger two, return to carrier. Acknowledge.”
“Acknowledge.”
“Dagger three, return to carrier. Acknowledge.”
“Acknowledge.”
“Dagger four, return to carrier. Acknowledge.”
“Acknowledge.”
“Dagger five, return to carrier. Acknowledge.”
“Negative,” Buck informs them. “I’m losing fuel, I don't think I can make it.” It was a lie. He knew he wouldn’t make it back.
Before anyone was able to comment on it, Buck continued. “Dagger five drawing enemy fire, activating SAMs in 15.”
“EVAN!” Maverick shouted. Wow! That’s the first time someone in the military has used his first name - ever -, he didn’t even know Maverick knew it. Well too bad it happened right before he died.
“It’s okay, continue on. I need to know you all going make it back safely.” Buck accelerated using the last fuel he had to get in front of the four other fighter jets and activating the next set of missiles, making all of them follow him.
He used all the firepower he had to take them out, not wanting them to engender the other fighter jets. Knowing he had fought to the very end. The sky was on fire around him. “Can one of you tell …”
Buck stopped mid-sentence as several of his warning systems activated. “MAYDAY! MAYDAY! MAYDAY!” Buck shouted glaring at the data. He turned his plane in a desperate nosedive as both engines caught fire. Knowing his plane was about to explode any minute Buck glared at the ejection button, he was too high up but maybe he should.
“Dagger five, …” Whatever someone was trying to say to Buck he couldn’t hear the rest, his ears were ringing. The exploiting hit his plane mere seconds after Buck hit the ejection button.
...
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Chapter 20: Old Knowleage and Proving Identity
Chapter Text
Buck came to in the snow. Everything was hurting. He couldn’t hear anything. But he also knew he couldn’t stay. They wouldn’t send a rescue team after him. He was in enemy territory, and they had bandits in the air. If he didn’t make contact within a given time limit, they were going to declare him dead. They have probably given him a day or two, maximum.
Buck knew this, it wasn’t his first rodeo. Thinking back to the map and his knowledge of the area, Buck tried to estimate where he was and to find an escape route. A way back home.
He wasn’t in pain, couldn’t really feel anything, but as he gave himself a once over, he noted several alarming things. Firstly, the metal rod sticking out of his leg and how the wound was bleeding profoundly, secondly what clearly was several broken and bruised ribs and thirdly a bad concussion. He had several cuts and bruises as well, but they weren’t as pending.
At that moment Buck was thankful he had high medical training. He fashioned himself a tourniquet and splint, dressed the worst cuts the best he could, and collected himself. Taking a few seconds to panic about not being in pain, Buck grabbed the medallion he was wearing. He had to make it back. Make it home. Home to his family in LA. Home to Christopher and Eddie. To Eddie. To his husband.
Buck made his way up a small hill near his original possession to get a better understanding of where he was. Spotting a small cabin next to an iced-over lake Buck blinked. Had he really been that lucky?
Buck made his decision. He couldn’t stay still anyway, or he would end up with hypothermia and die long before anyone – enemies, civilians, Americans, or friends – could find him. Especially since his plane was nowhere to be seen and that’s where anyone would start searching for him.
Tracking down the hill and towards the cabin and lake, Buck quickly realized he had underestimated the distance, but he couldn’t stop. He himself was the only chance he had for survival. Stopping or even slowing down would mean he didn’t make it. And was it one thing Evan Buckley - Evan Diaz - should be known for then it was that he never gave up, even when the whole universe was against him.
With that determination Buck continued on, not halting for a millisecond.
***
Buck didn’t know how long time he used to make it to the cabin, but the sun had disappeared, long gone behind the horizon, and he knew he had lost a worryingly large amount of blood that didn’t mix well with his concussion.
Buck was relying on instinct from his SEAL days and knowledge he had granted over the years as a firefighter as he broke into the cabin. Or at last, what looked like a cabin from the outside. He knew what the innocent little house of wood was hiding.
This had been his escape route when he was held captured years ago, but now he was going to use it to get access to something hidden deep inside. A well-hidden secret, not many people knew about. Unbeknownst even to most of the enemies stationed in the area. Buck had stumbled over it by accident trying to escape last time. Now, now it was going to be his escape.
He didn’t have the energy (or time) to track the wilderness for days upon days, so this had to work. If not … then he should have died in the original crash, or at least hope he was dead before the sun can raise again. He couldn’t go through their torture one more time, not if everyone also this time thought he was dead. Not if it meant being alive while Eddie and Christopher believed he was dead.
Taking a moment to ground himself in the small room, Buck grabbed hold of his medallion and the wedding ring. This half-ass plan had to succeed.
After more time that he had to lose, Buck swiftly uncovered the hidden ladder going underground. It took some maneuvering with his damaged leg, but with the help of some rope and his fantasy, he was able to get down to the tunnel. Turning left Buck made his way deep into the hidden network of tunnels.
He was almost discovered a couple of times, fortunately the few people making their way through the tunnels were clearly unorganized and stressed. They didn’t look around, which meant he got away by hiding in obvious or bad places. No one seemed to notice the small trail of blood he left behind either. Which was weird, but Buck did reason with that they did get blown up out of the blue earlier that day, and mostly low-level people used this part of the tunnel network.
He did eventually make it to an underground hangar hiding one of the best kept secrets. At last from the Americans. A supposedly fully operational Lockheed SR-71 Blackbird.
Buck knew as soon as he opened the hangar doors he would be marked, meaning he had to be ready to fly by then. He had never flown a reconnaissance aircraft before, but if he wanted back on US soil, he didn’t have many options. And this, this was his best bet.
Taking in the plane for a moment Buck glared around before he started the mental checklist making sure everything did indeed seem operational and ready to go. He knew the plane hadn’t been used in a long time, if the layer of dust on it was anything to go by. Not that Buck judges them, it was an expensive plane to operate. It was one of the reasons the last of them retired when he was eight.
After making sure everything actually looked operational, Buck left the cockpit open as he filled the plane with fuel before hitting the button to open the hangar door. Buck ran (limped extremely fast) as fast as he could back to the plane climbing inside fueled by pure adrenaline and slammed the button to close the cockpit.
Praying to all and every God, deity, and spirit that did or did not exist Buck turned the engine. Nothing. He tried again. Nothing. Someone was appearing the hangar from outside.
Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath Buck tried a third time. An alarm started blaring. Bucks’ eyes snapped open. It worked!
With a look at the alarm deciding it wasn’t important, Buck started driving forward. Someone was yelling and it was serval people by the exit, but they moved when Buck drove the plane forward, not wanting to be crushed by an aircraft. Smart move.
Outside the hangar, he was met with a road instead of a runway or taxiway, but he didn’t have a chance to think as people started gathering around him in a desperate attempt to try and stop the plane..
Buck accelerated as fast as he was able to and lifted the plane into the air as soon as he dared. Holding his breath as he lost contact with the ground behind him.
Leveling out in the sky, Buck turned on his ESAT, hoping someone on board the aircraft carrier or the reconnaissance plane from earlier today was able to pick it up. Buck knew he had to fly blind, that he didn’t have a navigation system, and it wasn’t like he could land on the aircraft carrier even if he could find one. Their runways were too short. After turning the direction USA hopefully was in and increasing his altitude to one that was higher than the normal flightpath Buck took some time to figure out the radio, activating it and changing into the frequency they had used during the mission.
“Commando center, Comanche, this is dagger five, do you copy?”
Nothing. Buck continued in the direction he had gambled on, hoping for the best. Repeating the same message every other minute. At last no planes seemed to pick up on him as he didn’t have any missiles or bombs coming his way.
***
“Commando center, Comanche, this is dagger five. Do you copy?” Buck repeated for the eleventh or twelfth time, a minute or three between each time.
“Dagger five, this is USS Leyte Gulf. Please prove your identity,” a male voice filled the cockpit of the blackbird. Buck could feel a heavy burden drop from his shoulders. He had found Americans. The worst part was over.
Buck decreased his speed as he answered. “Chief special warfare operator Evan Diaz nee Buckley, 0-6-1-1-9-1-3-7-2-8-4, callsign America.”
There was a long pause before he was included in a conversation.
“Copy, America. We have some difficulty picking up your location and what exactly you are airborne in. What do you need?”
“I’m trying to get to US soil, could you help me find the right course? I am in need of medical assistance but can’t land at sea. A landing speed of maybe 150 knots does not mix with an aircraft carrier.”
“Sir. With all due respect, you are on a path that will eventually take you to the West Coast, but no plane has a capacity great enough to make the whole distance.”
Buck huffed. “I am in airplane AF 61-7969. Look up the serial number if you don’t believe me. I will estimate it’s going to take an hour or so before I have dry feet. Please inform local authorities that I am on my way and to have medics on standby.”
It was silent a long time before a new voice said. “America, stay at altitude of 80’000 feet, speed 3G, in 53 minutes. Then prepare for landing. Authorities in Portland will be warned, and their airport closed, medical personnel will be on standby.”
“Thank you, America out.” Buck increased his altitude even more and changed his speed dramatically. Turning his clock to 52 minutes he activated the countdown.
As the plane stood steady Buck grabbed the St. Christopher medallion. “I am going to make it. I’m on my way home. I will see you again.” He let it fall to his chest before looking over himself.
His leg had stopped bleeding but had turned a sickening gray. His ribs hurt when he put pressure on it but otherwise seemed fine, his concussion had obviously not become any better, and a headache was starting to boil behind his temple. His smaller cuts had completely stopped bleeding and looked fine. So, the biggest concern was his head as it was nothing that could be done with the leg, not before he was inside a hospital.
He knew if he did fall asleep, fainted, or zoned out too far it was an extremely low chance he would wake up. Buck had to figure out something to keep his mind occupied and active.
Making a decision, Buck turned the radio to the frequency the first responders used, increasing the range to max and hit the recorder before he started talking.
“Hey Chris. You probably aren’t going to hear this but as I need to do something to make sure I make it to Portland with a bad concussion and a headache so I thought I could record some more Greek myths for you. What about we start with the tale of Daedalus and Icarus.”
“In ancient Greece flying above Crete on wings made from wax and feathers, Icarus, the son of Daedalus, defied the laws of both man and nature. Ignoring the warning of his father, he rose higher and higher. To witnesses on the ground, he looked like a god, and as he stared down from above, he felt like one, too. But in the myths the line that separated God from man was absolute and the punishment for mortals who attempted to cross it was severe. Such was the case for Icarus and Daedalus.”
“Years before Iracarus was born, was his father, Daedalus highly regarded as a genius inventor, craftsman, and sculptor in his homeland of Athens. He invented carpentry and all the tools used for it. He designed the first bathhouse and first dancing floor. He made sculptures so lifelike that Hercules, you remember Hercules and his twelve tasks, mistook them for actual men.”
“Though skilled and celebrated, Daedalus was egotistical and jealous. Worried that his nephew was a more skillful craftsman, Daedalus killed him. As punishment, Daedalus was banished from Athens and made his way to Crete.”
Chapter 21: Safe Landing?
Chapter Text
“Flipping himself down into his bed in frustration, Midas discovered his fluffy pillow had turned into solid gold. Hearing his cries of frustration, his daughter entered the room. But when Midas reached out to her, he saw with horror that he had frozen her into a golden statue.”
“Horrified at what he had done, Midas begged the gods to remove his power. Taking pity on the foolish king, Dionysus told Minds to wash his hands in the River Pactolus. When Midas reached into the river, the gold drained from his fingertips.”
“Midas returned home to find his daughter alive and his palace back to normal, and he was delighted. You would think he would’ve learned his lesson, but just a few weeks later, Mindas blundered again, insulting Apollo - the god of music and the sun - when he declared Pan the greater musician.”
Buck's watch started vibrating and beeping indicating that he was closing in on Portland. He turned off the watch and lowered his speed. Stopping the recording and changed the radio channel to the one air trafficking used to use.
“Air traffic control, city of Portland. This is America. Requesting permission to land.”
The answer comes surprisingly fast. “America, this is Air traffic controller. Please descend to 20’000 feet, and reduce speed to 400 knots so we can pick up your location.”
“Descending to 20’000 feet, reducing speed to 400 knots,” Buck called out as he lowered the plane.
“Inform us if you see any indications of your location. Our system isn’t designed to pick you up.”
“Copy that. No indications spotted.”
Buck waited until he got a new command.
“America, please descend future to 14’000 feet and 300 knots.”
“Descending to 14’000 feet and reducing speed to 300 knots.” Following the commands given to him, Buck closed his eyes for a short moment. He was over US soil, he would come home. Everything was okay now.
It was silent for almost ten minutes before someone addressed him. “America, we have a visual on your location. Please turn eleven degrees left and reduce speed to 200 knots. My colleague will walk you through the landing protocol. Medical personnel are on standby.”
“Turing eleven degrees and reducing speed to 200 knots. Waiting for future instructions.”
Another person took over and Buck followed the instructions to the letter, trusting that the personnel on the ground would lead him to the right path. Trusting them to lead him home.
It didn’t take long before Buck was able to spot the lights from the airport. He prepared for landing when he noticed his landing gear wouldn’t extend even if he didn’t get any error message from them.
“Air traffic controller, this is America. My landing gear is malfunctioning. I am going to have to do a belly flop. This is not going to be pretty. Have fire and rescue on standby.”
“America, this is air traffic controller. Fire and rescue are already on standby. Get the plane on the ground and everything else we will be taking care of. We have you.”
“Going in for landing now. Speed 200 knots but reducing. If someone is on the runway, that’s too bad for them. It’s now officially too late for me to turn around. I’m going to hit the ground one way or another.”
Buck hit the asphalt of the runway hard. Hard enough that his head hit the control panel making him see stars. He had to stay awake until someone got him. But he was safe now. He was back in the States. He was on US soil.
He grabbed the medallion close to his heart and prayed that the next time he opened his eyes that he would be next to his family.
Buck thought he picked up someone yelling something over the intense buzzing in his head, and there may have been things happening around him. But now that he was safe, now that he could breathe properly and the last bit of adrenaline was leaving his body, all Buck wanted was to close his eyes and sleep. Except his eyes were already closed. He knew he should stay awake. He’d been a firefighter long enough to know his symptoms were a bad sign.
It would only be for a few … …
Something – someone – hit him, hard, and there was something being shouted into his ears, but Buck couldn’t muster up the energy to react.
He would be fine.
He was safe.
He was basically home to his family.
He would suri…
...
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Chapter 22: Athena’s poor boys and Eddie’s unstable mental health
Chapter Text
A small alarm went off on Eddie’s phone. The man in question took a deep breath and turned it off. He looked at Athena who was with him in the hospital room. Maddie, Bobby, and Chris had left not long ago. Eventually convincing Chris to go to school for the day.
“This is it. Mission start. He has to succeed, alive or dead,” Eddie took a deap breath and closed his eyes.
“Here, Bobby left this for you,” Athena was holding her hand up towards Eddie when he eventually opened his eyes. She was holding a rosary beard.
“I haven’t used one of these since I was a teenager,” Eddie tried to smile but it was more like a grimace.
Athena gave him a look. “You don’t need to believe, if it works or not, well, it wil not have any negative consequences. Bobby said you could keep this one, it is not like he doesn’t have more of them at home.”
Eddie blinked at her. “I -,” He didn’t know what to say.
Athena gave him a sad smile and held the rosary beard closer to him. “Take them, pray if you can, don’t if you can’t. It’s out of our hands but, the only thing we can do now is hope that he makes it home alive, somehow.”
Eddie didn’t answer, but he did take the rosary beard. He looked at it and turned it in his hands.
“Eddie,” Athena’s voice was soft and so full of emotions, Eddie almost cried as he met her eyes. “Buck is a fighter, if someone could survive this, it would be Buck. He did pinky swear serval times that he would fight to come home to you. Your husband will return to you. There is nothing on this planet that can stop that man.”
“Yeah, he will be back. But you can’t promise his heart will still be breathing. The mission must succeed and even if it does, coming home wouldn’t be easy.” Eddie laughed wetly. “Buck called out his commander, said this mission needed three miracles to succeed. THREE! One is ‘problably suecide’ but …” he couldn’t finish the sentence. Athena could guess the end.
Buck and Eddie had been tight liped about any and all information about the mission, but she had gathered it was more dangerous than they had addmitted. Considdering who they had been after that admiral funeral Buck had attended and who depressed Eddie had been ever since. Plus that comment. Athena didn’t like witch direction all the neon arrows was pointing.
Athena swiftly moved to Eddie’s bedside. Holding him close and tucking his head into her shoulder. Trying to comfort him. “He loves you, and he married you. I don’t believe death or the devil himself can stop Buck from returning to you.”
“You know,” Eddie’s voice was muffled, shaking slightly, “Yesterday was the first time he told me he loved me. Of course I knew before that, but it was the first time he used those specific words. He texted me the same thing not that long ago, both in English and in Irish. I know he will do everything he can to try to come back home, I just … I don’t … the stake is so high and his chances are so low, and I don’t know what to do without him. I don’t know who I am without him. He is everything. My sun. My heartbeat. My will to live. I am afraid of who I may become if he doesn’t make it.”
They were both silent for a long time. Eddie was crying and Athena was completely lost for words. She didn’t know what to say, didn’t think that it existed words that could make a difference. Instead, she silently vowed to protect the man she was holding with everything she had and to make sure he would keep his head above water whoever this did end.
Athena knew Eddie wouldn’t actually do something if this didn’t end well, he had Christopher to take care of. She also knew that if something happened to the both of them Chris would have to live with herself and Bobby. As much as she did adore the kid who in some ways was like a grandson - even if he was only two years younger than her own son and she wouldn’t be caught dead being called grandma - he was going to need his fathers. Both of them, but at last Eddie.
***
Athena knew it was a short mission, that it only was in and out, but she didn’t expect Eddie’s phone to ring that early. Definitely not a good sign. “Could you? Speaker?” Eddie didn’t form full sentences, and his voice was still muffled by her shoulder, but Athena understood what he asked for.
It took some maneuvering for her to get Eddie’s phone without the man loosening his grip on the embarrassment, but she was able to get his phone, making sure they were both in a comfortable position before answering the call. Immediately putting it on speaker.
“Hi, this is Sargent Athena Grant-Nash, LAPD, I’m a friend of Buck and Eddie. You are on speaker, me and Eddie are the only ones in the room,” Athena informed whoever ‘Admiral Bates’ was.
“Sargent Grant-Nash, I’m Admiral Salamon Bates, Warlock, one of Ameri- Ev- Buckle- Buck’s commanding officers for this mission. I have spooked to Aki- Eddie before,” a deep voice answered Athena. “Akita, I need a vocal confirmation that Mrs. Grant-Nash can hear information about your husband and that she is trustworthy enough to not share information with anyone . I don’t know how long time I have, but I promise you will be properly informed as soon as we have time, you know who things can be.”
“Trust me, I know. You definitely have to keep me updated tho. Athena is basically Buck’s mom, and I need someone else to inform his sister and everyone else if I am not coherent after you give me the news. She is trustworthy and you can share the information with her in the room.”
Athena could hear the man on the other end of the phone take in a deep breath, as if he was preparing to give some bad information. She didn’t like this situation, but she had to be strong and support Eddie. “Begining from the start, miracle one - no problem, miracle two - there was some hiccup, but they were able to complete it according to the plan.” Warlock hesitated.
Athena didn’t know what the man was talking about, but by the tension that was partly leaving Eddie, she figured it had to be a good thing.
Eddie did actually extract himself from Athena. “So the mission was a success, the target was naturalized."
“Yes, it is. Eh…”
“Evan didn’t make it,” Eddie’s voice was eerily calm. But also deadly cold. Scarring Athena. If this was what he was afraid of becoming, she wouldn’t be able to save him, nor would she be able to help him, because that… That was a machine - not a human. And she could do nothing but watch if Buck's death stripped Eddie of his humanity and emotions . If this was what Eddie would become Athena would fully consider shooting him point-blank in the head herself. Then bury them together, make them indivisible in death as in life.
“We don’t know. His plane started leaking fuel, he drew enemy fire against order to- to make it safer for the others, they are all landing now, I’m going to get as much information from them as I can when they are all on the ground. But it was a lot of flames, the fighter jet exploded in mid-dive. We don’t know if he ejected, if he is alive or not. And even if he is-” Warlock's voice faded out.
“Then he is deep in enemy territory,” Eddie completed the sentence. “Set the clock, give him 52 hours, if we don’t have any indication by then, declare him … declare him dead,” Eddie’s voice was breaking by the end.
Athena let out a hard breath. It was still something human in him and it was still a possibility - whoever small - that Buck was alive. There was still hope. Athena had never believed in a fairy tale ending, but maybe now was the time to start believing. Heaven knows her boys deserved it more than literary anyone else.
“Okay, yeah,” Warlock sounded distracted, “fifty-two hours, we can give him that. Listen, I have to go, but as soon as I have something, even if it turns out to be nothing, you are the first one to know, okay?"
“Yeah, okay,” Eddie agreed. Athena swiftly hung up the phone call, feeling abnormally like she had not even 24 hours ago when she had just hung up on Buck after Eddie miraculously had made his own way out after being buried in 30 feet of dirt. To think about everything the two of them had been through the last hours, it had to be more emotional turmoil than most people faced in their lifetime.
Her poor boys. Athena prayed they both would make it out of this alive and whole, that they would still be functional human beings. Looking at Eddie, she almost didn’t recognize him. Everything was different from the man she had grown to love and look after. The man that was her son-in-law. His whole demeanor and body language changed. His face set in an almost blank expression that made Athena scared for and of him. If this didn’t go the right way, Athena could feel deep down that Eddie would never be himself again. Not if Buck was dead.
“Do you want me to inform the other that Buck is missing?” Athena kept her voice as soft as possible. Not wanting to trigger something in the particularly stranger in front of her.
“Set a timer on my phone, but don’t tell the others about the ticking clock. Keep it light, give them hope he may survive,” Eddie took a deep breath, looking at the rosary beads in his hand. His whole demeanor softing up, miniscurly. “Could you also ask the doctors and nurses if I could leave, if only for a short while? It’s something I need to do.”
Athena was about to answer when Eddie added. “And please, it was hard enough to get Chris to leave for school, I don’t want to keep him in the dark but,” he shifted clearly unsure who to end the sentence.
“I will fix it, I will do everything you need. Talk to everyone. You just stay here, I will be back shortly,” Athena gave Eddie a thigh hug and exited the room. Stopping with the door almost closed long enough to hear Eddie completely lose it - clearly screaming into a pillow -, before closing the door silently, taking a few deep breaths.
Athena met the eyes of a nurse who had frozen in place, eyes wide. Clearly he had heard Eddie as well as she had. Athena tilted her head towards the nurse. “His husband was just declared m.i.a.. Could you find Doctor North and find out whenever Mr. Diaz can leave the hospital for a little while? I am not sure exactly where he wants to go, but I believe it’s somewhere special to him and his husband.”
“I believe Dr. North wanted to keep Mr. Diaz at last until tomorrow for observation, but I can figure out if we can give him an hour or two,” the nurse gave Athena a concerned smile.
“Thank you, I have to make a few phone calls, but I will be just down the hall if it is something.”
***
Athena had finished the phone calls serval minutes ago, talking with Maddie, Bobby, and Eddie’s aunt, letting them contact the rest who should be informed. She hadn’t dared to enter Eddie's hospital room, too worried about what would come next. She had tried to keep the conversations she had had over her phone optimistic, but when Bobby had asked who Eddie had taken it, she couldn’t answer, and that in itself had been a blinking neon sign.
Athena was considering if she should bite the bullet and enter or not when a familiar man walked up to her. The relative young man (young in the sense that he was a specialist doctor who did not in fact have grey hair and grown-up children) had flaming red hair and almost prestige light blue scrubs. Doctor Miller North.
“Sargent Grant, you know I have a soft spot for first responders, but I really don’t like seeing your friends and family here. They have been through more than most people can even think about.”
“They definitely don’t deserve what life has given them, but still they don’t give up. I fear this may be the breaking point, and that it doesn’t exist a way out,” Athena gave the doctor a sad smile. “I don’t think Eddie would psychologically come back if this ends the way we fear.”
“Mr. Johnson informed me of the current change in the situation. You can leave with Mr. Diaz for a maximum of three hours, but he needs a check-up before he leaves and as soon as he is back. Not to mention he needs to always be with someone else, preferably with someone with medical training, but if you go with him, that will be suitable.”
“Thank you,” Athena spotted the same nurse from before. “I think he wanted to leave as fast as possible.”
The nurse met Dr. North’s eyes and nodded. “I will give him a proper check. Make sure his vitals are as normal as they can be in a moment like this."
***
Athena was surprised when Eddie did not in fact drive to any of the places that would be special to him and Buck, no place she knew or could guess the two of them had memories of. Instead, he drove almost out of the city and stopped at a small catholic church. Stepping out of the car Eddie took serval deliberately deep breaths. He didn’t say anything but he was playing with the black bracelet around his wrist.
Athena followed him in silence, giving Eddie as much privacy as she could. Inside they were met with a church servant which Eddie spoke to in Spanish before he stepped deeper into the nave. Athena stopped at a spot where she could see most of the open room. She knew Eddie wasn’t particularly religious, but he probably needed this. In her years as a police sergeant, Athena had seen a lot of people turn to religion when they had nothing else.
She watched as he stepped up to the sanctuary and lit a single candle, watching it burn for a long time before pulling something dark wooden out from his pockets and stepping up to the altar, kneeling as he prayed.
When Athena realized that Eddie was using Bobby's rosary beard she had to lay a hand over her mouth to muffle the sound she made. Luckily Eddie didn’t hear her, but the church servant did and walked up to Athena saying something in Spanish.
“I’m sorry, I don’t understand. I am just here because Eddie can’t be alone at the moment,” Athena kept her voice low.
“Oh, that is no problem, I just asked if you want me to pry with you or if you need someone to speak to, I am here. My name is sister Anna by the way.”
Athena didn’t say anything at first, but as the servant didn’t move she did eventually speak up. “I am protestant, not Catholic but he grew up in a catholic family,” she nodded towards Eddie, “as well as my husband, but he still attends mess when he can. I am not really familiar with your culture of saints, but if you should pray for someone who is missing behind enemy lines and possibly dead, but they have to survive for someone else sanity, whom would you pray to?”
The woman gave Athena a proper once-over before answering openly. “St. Jude Thaddeus, one of the twelve disciples and brother of St. James. He is the patron of desperate causes, desperate situations, and lost causes. Let me get a pamphlet for you.”
She was back with the peace of paper just as Eddie stood up. Athena thanked the servant before leaving with Eddie.
They didn’t head directly back to the hospital. Eddie drove to his house, and grabbed a few items, showing them into a bag - including two hoodies that clearly were Buck’s - on their way back.
Athena didn’t comment on who he was literally sniffing the hoodie he had thrown on after a new nurse had checked him over and given him the all-clear. Just trying to give him as much comfort as she could.
***
Chapter 23: Call in the middel of the night
Chapter Text
May was the one sitting in Eddie’s room when his phone started ringing. It was half past two in the night, but as no one wanted Eddie to be alone at the moment. As she was working evening shifts at the moment, and had the week off school - to prepare for her graduation exams - she had volunteered. It was not like it made a difference if she studied in the night or in the afternoon.
Eddie didn’t stir, so May made the decision to answer it, stepping outside, but leaving the door ajar, so she could keep an eye on Eddie’s sleeping form.
“Hi, you are speaking to May Grant,” she answered, making sure she didn’t wake up Eddie.
“Grant?” it was a man on the other end. “You don’t so happened to be related to police sergeant Grant-Nash?”
“Yeah, Athena is my mother. Eddie is asleep at the moment, but I can wake him if you need to speak to him.” May heard some movement on the other end.
“Depends if we can get him to Portland within the hour or not, I am Admiral Salamon Bates, Warlock, by the way. I talked to your mother over this phone yesterday.”
May took a deap berath. “Not that I know why you would want him in Portland, but even with plane that is almost three hours from LA, it’s no way he can be in portland within the hour.”
“Then, do you think he needs all the sleep he can get or should you wake him?”
May snorted. “If it has anything even remotely related to do with Buck, then he absolutely should be woken up.”
“Oh, this has everything to do with America,” the amusement was well hidden, but May was Athena’s child after all, she picked up on it. She wasn’t used to someone referring to Buck by his call sign, but as Christopher had taken a liking to calling Buck Captain America, she immediately knew who the admiral was referring to.
“Give me a moment to wake him.”
May muted her side of the phone for a moment stepping back into the room, closing it loudly after her. Eddie stirred but didn’t wake up.
Knowing she couldn’t just do anything to wake him up, shaking would usually get you hit, and yelling in the hospital was always a bad idea. May surveyed the room before she found what she was looking for. A cup. Filling it with her half-full water bottle she moved to stand at the foot end of the bed.
Using her years of practise with Harry May removed Eddies blacked and poured the water into an as big area of the man in front of her as she had liquid to in one swift movement.
Eddie glanced up at her frowning, clearly groggy from sleep. “Why am I wet?”
May couldn’t help but laugh. Eddie’s expression was priceless, she snapped a picture of it. “I have some admiral on the phone, something about Portland and Buck, wouldn’t really tell me anything.”
“Then what are you waiting for, put him on speaker,” Eddie definitely sounded desperate. May did as he asked.
“Hey, Mr. or is it Sr.? Are admirals Mr. or Sir.? Anyway, Eddie is awake, you are on speaker so he can hear you.”
“Warlock do you have Akita on the line?” a new voice entered the conversation. May was confused, Akita? Like the dog bread?
Eddie blinked rapidly, sitting up, “Is that Maverick?”
“Yes, what do you know about AF 61-7969?”
“AF 61-79?” Eddie scratched his head looking at May for a moment before continuing. “That means we are talking about a Lockheed SR-71. There are four the military doesn’t actually know the location on. 7953 is in outer space somewhere. With the 7957 the locals repurposed all the parts, 7966 is owned by a well-known black marced collector, displaying in his basement. 7969 is the only one that is supposedly operational, at last, that is what They insist.”
“So America definitely is airborne in a fucking Blackbird.”
“Maverick!” Warlock sounded exasperated. “I haven’t had the opportunity to tell him that yet.”
Eddie bolted up tackling May in the process of reaching for the phone, both of them ended up on the floor with a crash.
“He is alive?! Buck is alive?!!”
“That’s why I am calling. The USS Leyte Gulf recently contacted us. Say they had picked up a translation from America and shortly pinged his ESAT. He did say he was in need of medical, but we don’t exactly have much information. He is supposed to land in Portland in under an hour,” Warlock explained.
“In a Blackbird?” Eddie asked for confirmation.
“Yes in a Blackbird, we already have someone talking to authorities in Portland, making sure they close down and completely clear the airport. Medics and fire and rescue should be on their way,” Maverick added.
“I need me and Doctor Miller North to be included in all and every decision made about Buck's health,” Eddie declared. Sitting up and removing himself from May realising they both were on the floor. “Oh, and one more thing.”
“Yes,” by the one word it was impossible to tell who of the two men on the other end spoke.
“Right before the mission started Buck said he was ready for a legacy. If the mission succeeded or not, people would need a hero, they need hope ,” Eddie’s voice was thick with emotions. “Don’t hide what is going to happen in Portland. I’m not asking you to share actual details about the mission, unless the Department of Defense wants to, but let people - let the press - make the connection between this and Buck’s previous military career, but also what he has done as a firefighter.”
“‘Acsidently’ reveal his name and get the ball rolling, got it,” a third voice joined on the other end.
“Puma, how did you get here?” Warlock questioned.
Eddie could literary hear the SEAL smile. He hadn’t personally met him, but he had been mentioned in a few of Buck's military stories. “Cyclone sent me to fetch you both. Something about hiding important information from vital personnel or something.”
Eddie burst out laughing. “Everyone was hiding information about the mission. The risk of information getting to the wrong person or people being too scared was too high. It’s not like it wasn’t information hidden from all of us. The only one that did have the full picture is Buck. And he is never going to tell anyone, not even I had the full picture.”
“Was it something other than the weird list you keep from us?” Warlock questioned.
“Yeah,” Eddie didn’t elaborate.
“Well,” May injected. “Now it is a waiting game, right?”
“Yes, it is.” “Absolutely.” Both Maverick and Eddie agreed.
“We have to go, we have to talk to Cyclone, and make some other phone calls. Stay put in LA. I will make sure America is transported there as soon as he is deemed stable enough to transport,” Warlock said, ending the call before Eddie could answer.
Eddie stared at May. “He is alive!”
“Yeah,” May smiled back. “He is alive.”
“Dios mío, Evan is alive!!!” [(oh) my god] A big smile was taking over Eddie’s face. “He is alive!!”
May laughed, a burst of bubbling laughter from deep in her stomach. “Buck is alive.”
Eddie answered with a squeak, like an overexcited toddler. “He is alive.”
“What if I go and find someone that can get us in contact with Dr. North, and you call Maddie or Bobby, or maybe Hen or Karen, Christhoper is spending the night there, and I am sure he would be as excited as you to hear his Buck is alive and soon to be back in America. Wow, America back in America…”
Eddie laughed as May frowned. “I should probably call Hen and Karen, you can inform the others. Text them, we don’t need to wake them all.”
May shock her head. “I’m sure they wouldn’t mind, but sure, I can text them.”
Eddie waited until she was out of the room before calling Karen.
***
“That is excellent,” Doctor Miller North said. “Call us if something happens on the journey over, we will have everything ready til you get Mr. Diaz here. His vitals are stable, so I don’t think it will be a problem over, but you are transporting a national hero. Be gentle with him.”
“Take good care of him,” Eddie added. The doctors on the other end of the video call swiftly promised to be careful before they hung up.
“What do we do now?” Eddie turned to Dr. North. “Do we just wait?”
“Yes, we want for him to come here, and then we wait until he has healed enough for us to wake him up.”
And wait they did.
They waited.
Waited.
Waited.
…
…
Waited
Chapter 24: Wrong Book, Hope, and Family and Friends
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
The first thing Buck became aware of was that someone was gently stroking their fingers through his hair.
The next thing Buck became aware of was the smell of antiseptic middle and the nearly hidden smell of blood.
The third thing Buck became aware of was the steady beeping of a heart monitor and Christopher reading Narnia. Which didn’t make sense, because he had convinced Eddie to let him read The Hobbit. The kid had been extremely into Greek mythology as well, so shouldn’t they be reading Percy Jackson if they somehow had finished The Hobbit. “I’s t’ w’on boo’” Buck slurred. Trying to make sense of what was happening.
The reading stopped, and so did the fingers in his hair. Buck let out a small whine, wanting the clamming sensation back. The hand moved to his cheek, tilting his head slightly.
“Buck, cariño, can you open your eyes for me,” [sweetheart] Eddie's voice was low and a little unsteady.
A small hand slipped into his squishing. Buck tried to squish back, but his limbs weren't working.
“Evan, try to open your eyes, mo fhíorghrá.” [my true love.]
Buck had to fight, but he was eventually able to completely open his eyes. He had expected to be met with blinding light – he was becoming aware that he was in a hospital, the smell of blood and the beeping of a heart monitor cluing him in on his location – but the room was surprisingly dim.
Eddie was slightly leaning over Buck without crowding him and Christopher was sitting on the foot of his hospital bed. There was a bouquet of sunflowers on the nightstand and a pile of blankets was lying on one of the many chairs around the room.
Buck blinked trying to remember why he was in the hospital. “Why?” he asked as he couldn’t find up and down in his thoughts.
Eddie smiled sadly at him. “You survived the impossible and made news all over the world by returning in a missing aircraft. I have called for your doctor; he should be on his way.”
“You’re the biggest hero! You saved so many lives. The man on the TV was telling everyone how brave and amazing you are,” Christopher beamed up to Buck clearly forgetting about his book that was now in danger of falling out of the bed.
“They talked about me on the news?” Buck tried to examine his brain for any information that may tell him what was going on and why he was in the hospital. None of the other two answered. Letting him sit in silence and try to sort his thoughts. It was like connecting a big puzzle, but every piece was upside down and he couldn’t turn them.
“We are married,” Buck began with the memory strongest in his thoughts and looked up at Eddie until he nodded. “There was a mission. Failure wasn’t an option. I – I – Did I get hit by a missile?”
Eddie grabbed both his hands. “As far as they were able to understand, you weren’t directly hit by something, but your plane was severely damaged and leaking fuel. It caught fire and you noise drive, trying to extinguish the flames, but it exploded. No one was able to see you eject, but you had to, you wouldn't have survived otherwise.”
“It was snow and blood but no pain,” Buck frowned. All the puzzle pieces were there, he only had to find out how they connected, turning them around, trying to spot a picture. “I – it was longer than I thought it was, I- I entered where I got out last time. They hadn’t moved the plane. There was yelling. There wasn’t any runway, but I had to escape. I had to make it home. I- I-.”
His head snapped up, looking at Christopher. “Icarus, I- I recorded Greek myths for you. Had to stay awake. I made it home. I was safe.”
“We got a copy of the recording,” Eddie explained. “He listens to at last one story before bed, each and every night.”
There was a knock on the door before any of the three could say something more. “Come in,” Eddie called towards the door.
Doctor Miller North walked into the room followed by an unfamiliar nurse. Buck gave the doctor a sheepish look. “Hi, doc. Hoped I wouldn’t have to see you so soon.”
“Likewise, Mr. Diaz,” the doctor began. “Is it okay that Nurse Sarah gives you a check and redresses your bandages while I talk you through your injuries?”
Buck looked at Eddie, nodding towards Christopher. Eddie understood what he wanted. “Hey Chris, would you go and sit with Athena and the others while the nurse and doctor look at Buck? I’m sure they all would be happy to hear that your daidí is awake.” [dad]
“Who is in the waiting room with Athena,” Buck questioned his husband as Chris nodded and with the help of the nurse got off the bed. She swiftly closed the book and moved it to the bedside table.
“Literally everyone. The doctors said you would wake up sometime today or tomorrow, and they all wanted to be here. Me and Chris were the only ones allowed to wait in your room,” Eddie explained.
Buck blinked rapidly, trying to figure out who Eddie meant with everyone. Before he was able to come to a conclusion the doctor started talking and the nurse started carefully checking him over.
“Mr. Diaz, we have kept you in a medically induced coma for seven weeks. You were severely anemic and beat up when you arrived at the hospital in Portland.” One of the things Buck liked about Doctor North was that he didn’t beat around the bush. “You were immediately rushed into surgery because of the condition of your leg. The doctors operating on you had to amputate it to save your life, the damage was too severe, even if you had made it to the hospital earlier, it couldn’t have been saved.”
Wait, they had amputated his leg? Buck couldn’t properly feel his body because of the strong painkillers that were pumping into his blood, but shouldn’t he have realized if he was missing a limb?
Glancing down, he didn’t really see a difference. Eddie, seemingly able to read his thoughts, gently lifted the blanket revealing Buck’s feet. His foot. His left foot was missing from the middle of his thigh. Gone.
“I don’t feel that it’s missing,” Buck sounded unsure.
“That’s completely normal. Especially with how high dosage of morphine you are on.” The doctor gave Buck a sad smile before continuing. “You are going to need a lot of physical and mental therapy, but with the amazing family and support system you have I’m sure you will be able to walk again. I can’t promise you will be able to return to work, but you shouldn’t be restricted to a wheelchair.”
Buck beamed as he turned to his husband, he could feel a heavy burden being taken off his shoulders. “Did you hear that, Eds, I’m going to walk again.”
Eddie smiled back. “Yes, I know. Let Miller continue, there is a lot more.” They both turned back to the doctor, ignoring the nurse who had moved on to changing the bandage and dressing on the many wounds coloring Buck's skin.
“There were some complications during the amputation, meaning it took longer than we all hoped. You had lost a lot of blood and coded thrice on the operation table. You already had eight broken ribs when you got here, but you broke another two with the CPR, basically all your remaining ribs were bruised. Both your right shoulder and ankle were severely inflamed, and you still have a severe concussion. Not to mention several hairline fractures and severe cuts and bruises that are all slowly healing and will have to be fully healed well before you are allowed to move much.”
“I should be dead shouldn’t I doc?” Buck purposely didn’t look for his husband’s expression, but Eddie slipped his hand into Buck’s and squeezed. Silently supporting his husband.
“Yes, you should be. But the whole nation is grateful you didn’t.” The nurse spoke up for the first time, standing up, apparently already done with checking and redressing all of Buck's many wounds.
Buck let out a confused ‘Thank you,’ before looking towards the door. “Could I meet the others, not for long, I’m tired, but I want to see them.”
Buck’s doctor looked him up and down. “I will allow them ten minutes, nothing more. Then only Mr. Diaz is allowed to stay. Your son has to leave as well.”
Buck and Eddie shared a look, both nodding. “Thank you, Miller,” Eddie addressed the doctor as the relatively young man and the nurse exited the room.
When Eddie had said everyone was in the waiting room, Buck hadn’t expected them to be so many people. Not only was his whole fire crew with their family and children there – including Maddie and Michael –, but the whole team of aviators was also there as well as Josh, Carla, Maverick, Warlock, Philipps, Steve, Puma and Eddies abuela, aunt, sisters and several of his cousins and their family.
Buck quickly became overwhelmed by all the people, but he was happy. He knew the future would hold a lot of bad days and that recovery would be hard. He may not ever be the man he was before, but he had the family and friends to support him through it all.
He was safe. Everyone was. That was the only thing that mattered. Let the hard days come. He was ready.
Superheroes can bleed, but that does not stop them from doing the right thing. Even if it could have ended their life.
Notes:
Thank you all for reading this fic. It is definitely the longest work I have completed, and I appreciate all the comments and kudos you all are giving it. Hope the ending stands worthy of the fic.

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