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“You’ve been rather quiet, Buck. Is everything okay?”
Buck takes his eyes off his phone, locking it as he meets Bobby’s eyes.
“Too busy scrolling Grindr to talk to the likes of us, huh Buck?” Jokes Chim.
Buck huffs, “I’m not even on Grindr,” his phone hitting the table loudly.
Now all eyes are on him, fantastic.
The eyes of Bobby, Athena, Hen, Karen, and Chim. With May and Harry visiting their Dad and Denny on a school trip they were reveling in an adult only barbecue.
Enjoying drinks, food, and sunshine, retreating to the couches once the air got chilly.
“What’s wrong, Baby?” Asks Athena jumping up from Bobby’s side to squish in against Buck, once comfortable she pulls him into an embrace.
Buck is suddenly thrown back into the memory of meeting Bobby and Athena. His shift at the hospital ended in blood and sadness, Buck held on to his distress long enough, until he found shelter outside a restaurant.
It was called One Eighteen, the date of their anniversary. The outside had big windows and red awning.
The scents wafting out into the street were enough to entice him inside. He soon realized they were near closing, the person he mistook for a customer turned out to be a waiter.
He caught Bobby’s eyes before making a hasty retreat, the man stood confidently in his chef whites. Before Buck reached the door he said hello, his tone and smile welcoming.
Athena joined not long after, took one look at Buck, and offered him the last bowl of chicken stew, and a slice of cherry pie.
Overwhelmed, exhausted, and feeling a little lost, Buck nodded in answer. The food was delicious, the best garlic bread Buck had ever tasted accompanied the stew. The interior had deep red walls, mahogany tables, and chairs, and elegant lighting both natural and electric.
The effect was very romantic.
Once he got a better handle on his emotions, he thanked them and opened up. Discovering they knew Hen was a welcome surprise, she was one of the best doctors at the hospital.
He was accepted into their family and friend group soon after. Leading to lunches or coffee with Hen during breaks.
“I’m sad and lonely,” he’s met with concerned eyes and head tilts. “It’s a lot of things, a patient I was close to died and I can’t find a tattoo artist I like.” The words spill out unbidden, it’s the Athena effect. “But most of all, I want to find love.”
“Sorry about my wisecrack, Buck. Believe me, I know how awful the dating scene can be. But I try to believe the universe will send me a special person.” Offers Chim then after a beat adds, “You know I was trying to be inspiring but now I feel depressed.”
Buck chuckles a little.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring down the evening.” He apologizes.
“You didn’t, Buck, I’m sorry you’re hurting this much.” Consoles Bobby, “Would you like to stay in the guest room tonight?”
Buck smiles, he’s so happy to have these people in his life. He desperately wants to share them with someone. Being bi he never gave much thought about his forever person. Until recently, plagued by visions of doe brown eyes, dark hair, and a decidedly male form.
“That would be nice besides I’m not sure your wife will let me leave.”
“Definitely not,” agrees Athena, her hand playing with his hair, it feels so comforting.
“I can help!” Karen shouts, she’s rather tipsy. “I have a friend, he’s a tattooy person.” Her brow creases, as if knowing she said the wrong word but doesn’t understand how exactly.
“A tattoo artist.” translates Hen, her eyes fond.
“Yes! He does that.”
“How did you meet this friend?” Questions Athena, her gaze suspicious.
“At pick up, his son goes to school with Denny, the other Moms were in a frenzy over him. Karen was the only one to talk to him,” answers Hen, knowing Karen is too drunk to function.
“My immunity to pretty men worked a treat, all the other Moms were throwing me the stink eye!” she said in outrage.
“Does he have an Instagram?” asks Buck, somewhat intrigued.
Both Karen and Hen break out into raucous laughter, “Only for his business, he’s a complete technophobe!” Shouts Karen in a volume suited to a nightclub.
“Babe, take it down a notch,” says Hen while pulling Karen into her lap.
“Sorry, guys,” she whispers, “Let me make you an appointment, Buck please.”
Buck agrees, mainly due to being fed up with his own search. Hen motions for his phone, he passes it over, unlocked watching with interest as she navigates Instagram.
She returns it displaying a page for a shop called, Motif Tattoos. And yeah the work is stunning, intricate, and fresh. For the first time in a while, Buck feels a little excited.
***
Buck enters the tattoo parlor half certain he’s in the wrong place. For the most part, it seems normal, reception, chairs, and walls of tattoo designs to peruse.
What isn’t normal is the boy, sitting happily on a green chair. Curly brown hair, red glasses, and crutches were propped next to him. He’s at least a decade away from tattooing age.
Confusion furrows his brow, knowing Karen recommended this place keeps him from storming out.
She is a woman of due diligence.
“Hello,” greets the boy, adding a wave, “I’m Christopher.”
Buck’s head jerks back in surprise, thrown by the warm welcome, “Hey, I’m Buck.”
The boy tilts his head, “Like a deer?” he asks, scrunching his nose cutely.
“Yeah, my real name is Evan, Buck comes from my surname Buckley.”
The boy nods seemingly happy with the explanation.
“Is that what you’re here for, a deer?” The boy, Christopher, points to the nearest wall. Buck moves closer and is met with a host of miniature animal tattoos.
Yeah, he absolutely wants one, or many.
“I could get a whole zoo!”
Christopher laughs, once standing he joins Buck at the chart, without his crutches. He chooses not to comment on it, not knowing Christopher or his ability. But his reflexes are sharp if they need to be.
“Do you have a favorite?” He asks as he looks over the chart of animals.
“The humpback whale, I like ocean creatures.” Buck looks where he’s pointing, finding it surrounded by many other sea creatures.
“You could get the whole Ocean, look there’s even an angler fish.” He’s surprised to see it as an option, it’s cuter than its real life counterpart.
“Maybe when I’m old enough, which is your favorite?” Buck hums in thought as he scans the wall, his eyes landing on a panda holding bamboo.
A flood of sadness swells in Buck’s chest, so fast it feels suffocating. It steals his ability to breathe for a moment.
“Buck? Are you okay?”
Christopher’s concern pulls him back from the brink. He gasps for air as the pain recedes, “The Panda,” he answers, his voice raspy and laced with sadness.
When he was little, Maddie made up stories for him at bedtime. His favorite was the playful Panda, who always got into mischief and learned many valuable lessons.
“Hello? Is someone out there?” calls a voice from the back.
Buck’s eyes sting from holding the tears in, suddenly missing his sister like a lost limb. Turning around he comes face to face with a man standing behind the counter.
Buck blinks twice, the sudden vision in front of him shocks his system. The man is stunning, tall though still a little shorter than himself. With brown hair, eyes, and tanned skin, and a few visible tattoos on his forearms.
Buck‘s mind wanders to the skin obscured by clothing, a tight Henley and well-fitted jeans.
He was ticking all the boxes of the man his mind kept conjuring.
He watches as the man catches sight of Christopher, his shoulders slumping in defeat, as he pinches the bridge of his nose. “Christopher, I’ve told you not to sit out here, you’ll give customers the wrong impression.”
Buck smiles, “Oh, so you’re not tattooing minors?”
“Nope, he just likes to say hello to people. I have no idea where he got his love of socialization from.”
“Not you?”
Christopher laughs wholeheartedly, “No, I’m not one for small talk.”
Buck can appreciate a strong silent type.
“So, did you want to make an appointment?” asks the man, suddenly it occurs to Buck that this must be Eddie.
Buck swallows, he’s in trouble because Eddie is so fucking hot.
“I have one already, I think. My friend Karen set it up, though she was tipsy at the time.”
“Wait, you’re Buck?” Buck nods in confirmation, Eddie mutters to himself but the words are unintelligible.
“Sorry, if it’s short notice, she was insistent.”
“No, I had an opening, she called the next afternoon sober to convince me it wasn’t…” Eddie trails off leaving the sentence unfinished.
“Convince you of what?” Buck asks before he can stop himself.
“That this isn’t a set-up!” Buck feels his stomach of butterflies swoop in disappointment and stay still.
“Really? So I’m what, your type” Buck decides to tease.
“I plead the fifth,” Eddie blushes.
“Do you always blush like that?” Eddie’s blushes grow pinker. “Never mind I have my answer, I like it.” Buck is shocked at how forward he’s being, “Sorry, I’ll reel it back in.” he apologizes, hoping he isn’t crossing into creep territory.
“Do you work with Karen?”
“No, Hen, I’m a nurse.”
“Do you know Denny?” Interjects Christopher.
Buck turns his attention to the boy, “I do,” Christopher nods walking over to his dad.
“I’m going to play my Nintendo, while you two talk about tattoos.” He says before disappearing from view.
“Wow, I feel hurt,” jokes Buck.
“Yeah, tattoos can’t hold up to the wonders of Nintendo.”
“I guess they are kind of analog.” It was nice that in an ever-shifting technological world, some things could stay the same.
Wow, was he becoming a technophobe?
“So, um did you want to get inked today or are you scoping me out?”
Buck smiles, “Oh I’m definitely scoping,” he adds a wink enjoying the blush that takes over Eddie’s cheeks.
Good God! What is happening? Has his brain completely disconnected from his mouth?
“What are you after?” Buck watches Eddie’s eyes fill with regret at the phrase.
He decides to go with mercy, just this once, “I want a floral tattoo, nothing specific exactly. Could you sketch some designs? I want it either below my right collarbone or my right bicep.”
“Sure, are there any flowers I need to stay away from?”
Buck shakes his head when the scent of his childhood home bombards his memory. “No lavender,” he answers with a slight shudder to his body.
“I can email you the designs.” Buck moves closer to the desk, taking the pen from Eddie to write his email.
Then he shoots his shot, “Can I take you out on a date?”
“Oh!” Eddie’s eyebrows meet his forehead in surprise, “Really?”
“Yes, I know it’s fast but I want to if you’re interested.” Honestly, Buck has jumped into bed faster than the speed he’s currently running at, but Eddie doesn’t need to hear that.
Christopher pops his head out from the back, “Say yes, Denny told me Buck’s cool.”
“I thought you were playing Nintendo, not talking with your friends.”
Christopher rolls his eyes, “I was doing both, anyway you always say we can’t order takeout because only practice makes you better at something, be it cooking or in this case, dating.”
Buck laughs, he fucking loves this kid.
“I regret teaching you that.” Sighs Eddie running his hand through his hair.
“How about a dinner date? Somewhere relaxed.” Offers Buck, Eddie doesn’t give off fancy restaurant vibes, hell, neither does Buck.
“Okay.” Buck quickly adds his number to the form. They nod at each other, smiling Buck goes to leave but stops, his eyes glancing over at the chart of animal tattoos.
“Actually, can you do me right now?” Eddie’s eyes go astronomically wide, his cheeks flushing heavily, “Woah, no, I mean, can you give me a tattoo now?”
Eddie deflates, “I can squeeze you in.”
***
As soon as Buck is out the door, Chris cheers and Eddie pulls out his phone for emergency texting purposes.
E: Buck asked me out!
K: OMG! Tell me you said yes?
E: I did and I’m freaking out!
K: Yes, Eddie! Buck is amazing, he’ll be so good for you.
E: It’s just one date.
K: True, but I know things you don’t.
E: Wait, was this actually a set up?
K: Not exactly.
K: But I have wanted you two to meet for ages.
K: Only naturally.
K: This was the best drunk Karen could manage.
< center>***
Once outside the parlor, Buck dials Bobby, thankfully it doesn’t ring for long.
“Hey Buck, how did the appointment go?” Bobby’s voice works like a balm to Buck’s excitement.
Looking down at his covered panda tattoo he smiles, choosing to find joy in it along with the sadness.
“Bobby, I think he’s the one.”
“For your tattoo or do you mean romantically?”
“Both, I asked him out and he said yes. It feels fast but right. I hope I’m not allowing my loneliness to mess with my head. Shouldn’t it take time to find my person?” The words spill out of Buck without pause, both his brain and heart longing.
“Hey, now, Buck, take a deep breath. It’s just a date, if you feel so strongly about him that can only mean good things.”
“Right, thank you.”
“Why don’t you take him to Cassia for dinner? And before you say anything, it’s fine. You need to be relaxed rather than worrying about me and Athena or Chim popping by.”
“Okay,” Buck was going to give Bobby a huge hug when he saw him next.
“Just bring Eddie over to One Eighteen for your second date.”
“Second date?” Thank you for the optimism.”
“It’s available whenever you need,” comes Bobby’s reply.
***
Buck was on cloud nine after his dinner with Eddie, the actual date was ongoing. Currently they are walking along the Santa Monica pier.
After a delicious feast at Cassia where Buck had eaten his weight in vegan curries and attempted to match Eddie on spice level, failing spectacularly.
The meal ended with coconut ice cream and coffee. So what if he didn’t sleep, the mix of sweetness and bitterness was too tempting to pass up.
They were now walking by the water, the night balmy and Buck could feel sparks whenever they got close. They kept conversation light at dinner, with no heavy topics but Buck needed that to change.
“Have you always been a tattoo artist?” he asks, hoping to steer the conversation down a particular path.
“No, I was in the Army.” Buck misses a step, Eddie reaches out to steady him, sparking fizzes of anticipation where Eddie’s fingers hold him.
“Oh, that’s uh, wow.”
“You speechless, Buck?” Teases Eddie, his eyes lit with joy.
“A little,” Buck reaches for the man’s hand, happy when he doesn’t pull away, “Are you okay?”
“I’m in therapy,” Buck nods, “It took a long time for me to accept that I needed it. Coming home wasn’t easy, I was injured, and my parents were never very understanding. Leaving El Paso with Christopher and coming here was the best decision I ever made.”
“I’m sorry.” Eddie stops and takes a seat on a bench, Buck joins him.
“So why nursing?”
Now that’s an easy question, “I ran from my home once I was old enough. Drove across the country and visited Peru before ending up here.” Buck lookd around at the water and palm trees, LA felt like home, the moment he stepped off the plane. “My sister is a nurse, for most of our childhood it was us against our parents, hell, she practically raised me. I wanted her to be proud of me so I joined nursing school a week after arriving.” It was years later and he loved the work, he loved helping people.
“You’re not in touch with her, are you?”
Buck shakes his head, the tears behind his eyes threatening to spill, “No, I think she’s still in Boston, or maybe Pennsylvania. Our relationship became strained after she got married, but recently I’ve been thinking of tracking her down.”
“You should try, maybe she wants to talk to you too.” Eddie knocks their shoulders together.
“While we kept things light over dinner, this doesn’t feel like a practice date.” Said Buck trying to sound casual.
Eddie meets his eyes with both hope and caution clear to see. “I haven’t dated much because my head wasn’t in the best place. And I’m not good at the whole hook-up scene.”
“I’m over the hookup scene, I want to build a nest with someone.”
Eddie smiles, his cheeks blushing beautifully in the darkening light, “Well, it’s a good thing I’m a nester.”
“Shall we walk back to our cars?” Suggests Buck, catching disappointment flashing in Eddie’s eyes. Is that right? Or is his imagination misfiring?
Oh, did he expect a kiss? Crap, has he messed this up already?
They’ve hardly walked thirty steps when Eddie stops next to a truck, “This is me.”
“Wow, that was fast. Did I mess things up by not kissing you on that bench?”
“Only if you don’t kiss me now.”
“Oh,” Eddie raises his eyebrows, “Oh,” simultaneously they begin laughing.
Buck reaches for him, pushing him against the truck before taking his lips in a hungry kiss. Eddie meets his tenacity, licking at his bottom lip for entry. Buck opens, their tongues dancing as the kiss becomes more heated.
They break apart breathlessly, Eddie looks dazed and very pretty.
“That was..” Buck trails off unable to find the words.
“Yeah, it was.” The fact that Eddie is just as affected feels fantastic, “So did you decide what tattoo you're going to get tomorrow?”
“Not yet, Eddie, the designs you sent, they’re so beautiful, it’s like spectacularly hard to decide.”
“Wow, that’s a ringing endorsement.”
“I’ll post a review.”
***
Thursday finds Buck back in Eddie’s chair, shirt off and ready for inking.
“See something you like?” He teases, Eddie has been gawking ever since, his eyes roaming over Buck’s torso for longer periods. “You’re adorable when flustered,” adds Buck.
“Shut up,” responds Eddie, his cheeks blushing as his pen drops to the floor, for the third time. “I didn’t realize nurses worked out so much.”
“Sometimes I have to lift people,” Buck throws him a wink, making it clear he wants to lift Eddie.
Eddie sighs in frustration, hopefully, sexual but more likely annoyance. “Behave, I’m about to poke you with needles.”
“Do you say that to everybody who sits in this chair?” Eddie glares at him, “I’ll behave.”
“You’re certain this is the tattoo you want?” Questions Eddie for what must be the fourth time.
Buck rolls his eyes, “Yes, I’m very fucking certain.”
“Language!”
“Who are you? Captain America?” Jokes Buck knowing Chim would be proud of his quick wit. Wait, Buck frowns, “Were you a Captain in the army?”
“Staff Sergeant.
“That is so hot!” Eddie glares again, “Fine, I’m going to sit still and be quiet while you poke me.” Buck laughs, and a second later Eddie breaks too.
The tattoo he chose is a bracelet that wraps around his right arm below his elbow. It’s made up of intertwined Forget-me-nots and magnolias.
The familiar sound and sensation of the tattoo gun fills Buck’s ears and body. It’s a light scratching, and he finds himself relaxing. He watches Eddie, his face a mask of concentration, as he moves the gun with precision.
“So why flowers?”
“I’ve always liked them, they’re pretty.”
“They are.” Buck smiles at Eddie’s easy agreement, he wasn’t wasting time on a man threatened by flowers.
“I um, had a patient, she was named Fleur. She was such a character, we lost her a few weeks ago. I wanted to remember her, and this felt like a way to do that.”
“That’s beautiful, Buck.”
“So I was wondering if I could take you and Christopher to the Aquarium?” Buck shifts the conversation to keep from crying.
“Christopher would love that,”
“Well let me know what Saturday works best and I’ll book it off work. We can spend the whole day together.” Buck smiles big and wide, unable to temper it down.
Later Buck leaves after a rather intense kissing session that almost ended in a code violation. Unfortunately, Buck was cock blocked by a full day of appointments.
He drove home smiling any time he caught sight of his tattoo.
***
Eddie checks his phone while walking, he knows he shouldn’t but it’s become his go to movement any time he has a free hand.
A week ago he’d fucked everything up, sending Buck away with a fresh tattoo and a promise to text him about the Aquarium.
Only he didn’t, and he never discussed it with Christopher.
Eddie comes to a stop realizing he passed the bakery half a block ago. He needed a pick me up in the form of chocolate raspberry cupcakes.
He looks around to get his bearings quickly, noticing a restaurant, the One Eighteen.
Buck spoke in great detail about it when they had dinner.
Could Buck be inside?
Butterflies flutter in his stomach, displacing his need for chocolate. He’s uncertain if Buck has told anyone about his drop in communication.
Only Karen hasn’t berated him, so maybe not.
He enters the restaurant, it’s quiet due to the hour. A man is behind the bar, he looks approachable and steadfast.
“Good evening,” greets the man, “Can I get you a drink.”
“Do you know Buck?”
The man narrows his eyes, his stance turns defensive, “Eddie?”
He nods.
“Look I know you probably don’t think much of me right now.”
The man holds his hands up in surrender, “I’m Bobby,” he introduces himself, “Buck hasn’t spoken about you since your date. Tell me to mind my own business but did something happen?”
Eddie parks himself on a stool, “I messed everything up.”
“I doubt that’s true,”
“I was meant to text Buck about our plans to take my son to the Aquarium.” If Bobby's surprised he doesn’t show it, his expression remains open and comforting. “I never texted him, that was a week ago.”
“Because it was moving too fast?”
“A little, but I was more scared that I wasn’t scared. Buck has felt like endless possibility ever since I first saw him.”
“I’ve known Buck for almost two years, and for all that time he’s been searching for something. Be it his place in the world, his home and love is a big part of that for him. He was so excited the day he met you like his search was finally over.”
“I don’t have as much faith as he does.”
“So maybe start with honesty, tell him how you’re scared or not scared. Buck doesn’t give up easily, so maybe he’s giving you space for now. But he’ll call soon enough unless you do it first.”
Suddenly an idea pops into Eddie’s head, and he smiles, “Do you know where the nearest florist is?”
“There’s one across the street.”
“And are you willing to give me Buck’s address?”
***
Buck was sitting in his loft staring at the last text he sent Eddie, a week ago. Has it been that long?
He wanted to give Eddie space, this feeling between them was moving very fast. A freak- out would be warranted.
After three days of radio silence, Buck knew he was close to going full Buck. So he distracted himself searching for Maddie.
With zero desire to call his parents, which left him with the joy that is social media.
Finding nothing for Maddie, he’d messaged friends he remembered from the hospital she worked at last.
Where he sent those postcards long ago.
Days later on a break his phone rang, expecting it to be Chim he answered without looking.
Sadness enveloped him at the sound of her voice. The soft way she said Evan felt like home because that’s what she was to him.
And in a few days, she would be arriving in LA, after a broken marriage and a need for a fresh start.
Buck couldn’t wait, the news burst out of him on game night at Bobby’s and Athena’s. Everyone was very excited to meet the older Buckley, the way Chim perked up at seeing her picture didn’t escape his notice.
He wasn’t opposed, Chim was a good guy and his easy humor could be exactly what Maddie needed. But making the man squirm was too good an opportunity to pass up.
Athena was quick to invite herself along for the airport pick-up. No arguments.
Buck rolled his eyes far from Athena’s eyeline, of course, and accepted the offer.
After sending a snap of his new Panda tattoo, Maddie responded in a range of emojis. She demanded he take her to get one as soon as she stepped off the plane.
He jumps at the knock on his door, closing his laptop he heads to answer.
Opening it to find Eddie standing in front of him. He was glad the decision had been made for him.
“Hey.”
“Buck, I’m sorry I didn’t text back and for not telling Christopher about the aquarium trip.”
Buck frowns, “Why don’t you come in.” He offers, stepping aside to allow entry.
Eddie nods, quickly bending down to grab something. Before stepping over the threshold he presents Buck with a beautiful bouquet of white, blue, and pink flowers.
“They’re beautiful.”
“Um, the tulips are to say sorry, the forget-me-nots love and devotion, and I chose the ranunculus because they were pretty.”
“Thank you, Eddie. I’m not mad, I chose to give you space. Only I got distracted while distracting myself.” Eddie frowns in confusion, an effect that shouldn’t be so damn cute.
“Huh?”
“We were moving pretty fast, I get that. So to keep myself from texting you I began searching for my Sister.”
“Oh my God, Buck, that’s amazing, any joy yet?”
“She’s arriving the day after tomorrow.” Eddie moves to hug him but stops himself.
“I’m so happy for you.” Eddie squeezes his shoulder before adding. “I want to say that I never felt scared with how fast we were moving, which did scare me, a little. But it feels like the right speed for us.
“Eddie, I don’t know what to say.” Buck was swooning from the romance of it all.
“Would you still like to visit the aquarium and start again?”
Buck laughs, they may not have spoken in a week but it doesn’t feel like it. Somehow they slot together as if they’ve already known each other for years.
“Yes, of course, I’m not giving up on what’s between us.” Eddie beams at him.
“Bobby told me you never give up easily,”
“You spoke with Bobby?” Eddie nods, causing a warmth to fill Buck’s body. Do you need to be back for Christopher?
“No, he’s with my cousins, I’m picking him up at eight.”
Buck bites his lip, joy blooming as he notices how much attention Eddie is giving the action.
“I have work in about two hours, you think you can show me how sorry you are in that time frame.”
“Absolutely.” Eddie moves, eyeing Buck like prey, he’s all for it until he remembers the flowers.
“Wait!” Eddie stops immediately, “The flowers,” he hurries, grabbing what’s at hand, finding a jug. He fills it with water and unceremoniously places them inside.
He turns, knocking against the wall that is Eddie’s chest, wow he’s stealthy. Before he knows what’s happening, Buck is lifted on top of the island, and Eddie stands between his legs.
They meet in a kiss filled with longing too powerful to be contained, Buck whimpers as Eddie grabs his ass. Lifting him with ease, Buck immediately wraps his legs around Eddie’s waist.
“Bedroom?” asks Eddie, his breathing heavy.
“Upstairs,” Buck laughs at the flash of irritation that crosses the man’s face.
“You better not drop me!” Screams Buck as Eddie carries him up the stairs.
Days later, Maddie joins the three of them at the aquarium.