Chapter Text
Ding
The elevator finally arrived at the bottom, so we all stepped off. Infront of us was a room with checkered floors and 16 podiums in a circle. It looked very well kept for being under a volcano.
Each podium had one of our names on it. I took my place, further from Painty than I wanted, but what can ya do.
Three podiums were empty though. Instead of a person, there was a picture of what I assume is the object that was supposed to stand there.
There was one of a man I didn't recognize, one of OJ, and one of Tea Kettle. Each with a joke written on it that wasn't that funny.
Y'know, usually I'd find that a little funny, but in this situation, it left me with a bad taste in my mouth instead.
Once ready, MonoPhone explained the rules, I half listened. Something about, we'll all die if we vote the wrong killer, and they'll get eliminated when we vote right.
Then we were ready to begin.
"So.... what's first on the agenda?" I ask. They were all experienced veterans and this was my first time doing this, so I didn't really know where we would start.
Yang gladly answered my question with a shout, "I FOUND THE BODY!"
"Oh no!" Goo exclaims with fear, "Is this gonna be the same thing with OJ?"
"No," Cabby reassured. "There were too many people that found her at once. It would be impossible to tell who was innocent and who was not just from that."
Paintbrush starts to lead them in a more direct direction, "Then, let's talk about how she was found."
"Broken beyond repair?" The silver spoon mumbles.
"Jeez!" Bow says. "How could someone even do that!? Porcelain's not that breakable?"
"Oh yeah!" I say like a lightbulb going off in my brain. "The murder weapon?"
"It was a hammer, dear," Silver Spoon answers again, but not without a remark. "Ugly looking thing, too." He doesn't bother to mumble this time.
"A hammer!?!" Shrieks Clover. "Where did they get a hammer from?"
Candle, with the grace of someone not in a murder trail, answers the girl's question, "I believe there is a tool shed on the island that carries a whole of different weapons for our use. The Cabana we have all passed by when we first arrived."
Oh? "And how did you know it had weapons in it?" I confront.
She looked back at me, locking her gaze in my eyes. An intimidating purple glow came from her blue-ish eyes.
"I have my ways," she says with a smile, but that wasn't an answer.
I was about to say so, but Paintbrush was quicker, "That's not an answer, Candle." They then began to question her further, "How did you know about the shed? Only Lightbulb, Fan, Testtube, and I knew, so, how?"
I look back to Candle, expecting to see her at least upset at their accusing words. But instead, she remained as calmly as ever.
"No need to erupt, Paintbrush. I simply found it while on a walk. It wasn't exactly hidden." Paintbrush still didn't seem satisfied. "Before OJ trial," She clarifies.
"She was with me, Brush, dear," Silver says in Candle defense, "during the whole alarm thing-y. She's innocent."
That seemed to settle that, but I could tell Painty didn't exactly believe him either.
Testtube is the next to speak, "No, no. The hammer couldn't have been from the cabana. We locked it up and hid the key, remember?"
"Someone must have found it then?" Said Yin.
"Only we knew where it was hidden, though."
Fan then clears his throat to say something, "Unfortunately, the hammer definitely came from the cabana. The door was open and one of the hammers was missing from his place on the wall."
"I-" Balloon interjects with hesitation, "I hate to say it, but it seems kinda obvious who did it then."
"Who?" Bow asks for him to explain.
"Paintbrush, Lightbulb, Fan, or Testtube? It would make sense, since the hammer that killed Tea Kettle clearly came from the cabana."
When he finishes, all eyes turn on us.
"I was leading the main group to look for an escape, " Painty explains. "You all saw me the whole time."
"That is true," Cabby confirms while checking her files. Did she need a file to prove that? Eh, that is probably something I would do. I am pretty forgetful, hehe.
Yang yelled, "FAN, TESTTUBE, AND LIGHTBULB WERE NOT WITH US." He was really loud. I guess that's just how sounds.
"So, Testtube, Fan, and Lightbulb are the only ones without concrete alibis. Correct?"
Testtube was quick to defend herself, "Fan and I were together the whole time."
Goo gasped suddenly, "A double murder!?"
"It was not a double murder, because we didn't kill her!" Fan yelled back.
Goo shrunk in on himself a bit. He was only trying to help. But Bow comforted him with a gentle pat.
"It wasn't them, Goo," She reassured him while also defending Testtube and Fan. She looks back to the group, "It was Lightbulb. She was with her the whole time, right?"
"The picnic," Cabby added.
"Exactly!"
"Could be...." Nickel said, pondering the idea. Kinda rude, right?
But thankfully Balloon was there to defend my honor, "It couldn't have! We saw her run away from the picnic, so she wasn't even there in the end."
No one looked convinced. Hm, maybe I should try... "Okay, what about you two?" I pointed an accusing finger at the two boys. "You both prolly killed in cold blood, didn't ya!"
"Wh-what? No! And hey, I just stood up for you!" Balloon squeaked.
"That could be why Nickel was so defensive when we were asking him about the murder earlier," Painty joins in, agreeing with me of course.
"Oh, come on! He's always like that!"
"I definitely didn't kill her!" Nickel tried to defend himself, but I was just too locked in to let him get away with this.
"Sarcasm! I don't believe you!" I yell across the room.
"For once, that wasn't sarcasm. That's just how I talk, asshole!"
"Were you not the last people with her? If Lightbulb ran away, that would only leave you two," said Testtube and her keen eye. Or ears in this case.
Nickel didn't give up that easily, however, "No one was with her, remember? Balloon pussied out too. I went after him."
"Who can confirm that?" Paintbrush furrows their brow at the claim.
"Well, no one, but... uh..." Balloon softly says. We had them backed in a corner.
"Um-" someone else tries to say something too, but it went unheard as the argument continued.
"Then there's no one to believe you! Killer!" Maybe I was taking this too far, but it was true they were the last ones with TK before she died. It felt a little unbelievable to think they did do it, but everything felt a little unbelievable right now.
I was mad, kinda. Not at them (unless they did it), but at this whole situation. Tea Kettle was my friend. She was so nice to us. Who would have the heart to kill her like that? None of this made sense to me.
"Uh, guys..."
"You could be the killer too, you know!" Nickel yells towards me.
"And you know that's not true-"
"GUYS!" Clover finally yells, and the room goes silent for her.
She looks around the room for a moment before continuing, "I was with Nickel and Balloon after they ran. I'm their alibi."
Ah. I catch Nickel's eye as he gives me a knowing smirk. I attempt to wave it off.
"And no more fighting like that!" Clover scolds. "Nickel and Balloon are your friends and alibis, Lightbulb. Let's all just be friends, okay?"
Sigh. Nickel was right, I was being an asshole, wasn't I? I felt bad now. Poor Clover. She just wanted us all to get along. And there I was, thinking my friends were murderers or something! But to be fair, they thought I was too.
"Kind of hard to when we know someone in this room killed Tea Kettle," Nickel responded to the tall, not-so-lucky girl's speech.
Unfortunately, he was right again. Someone here, in this room, standing among us, was a cold blooded killer. Whether it was Balloon and Nickel or not.
The room was uneasy with quietness again.
"Well," Testtube got everyone's attention with a clap of her hands, "let's discuss the motive, shall we?"
"The time limit? I thought it was pretty self explanatory," said Fan.
"True, but it doesn't hurt to look further into it."
Cabby began to explain what she wrote down in her useful files, "When the time limit began, Tea Kettle, Lightbulb, Balloon, and Nickel were together. While we don't have outside witnesses, I believe it's safe to assume at least one of them is innocent. Lightbulb left first, then Balloon, then Nickel." She flipped the page, "....By the looks of it, Tea Kettle didn't move places, since we found her still laying on the picnic blanket."
"So, whoever killed her, came to her...." Painty mutters, but loud enough for us to hear. "Was she chosen on purpose, or was she just the closest victim?"
"Paintbrush," Fan starts, "she was killed when the timer hit one. She was obviously chosen because she was the closest to the killer. I mean, who would plan to kill Tea Kettle, of all people?"
Me and Painty give a look to eachother, both thinking the same thing. Nickel was the only person who even slightly disliked her.
We look at him to try and guess what he's thinking. But I guess we didn't hide our glances well enough, because he bursts out in anger.
"I DIDN'T KILL HER!" He inhales, calming himself, before continuing, "Out of everyone here. She was the one I.... disliked the least. I didn't want her dead, I swear!"
I got the odd feeling that he was actually trying to be sincere, in his own odd way. But I couldn't really talk.
"We know, Nickel," said Balloon, trying to be reassuring. "None of us wanted her dead. Like Fan said, she had to just be.... the closest victim." He frowns.
"Can we get back to the cabana for a second? I feel like we may have forgotten something," asked Clover.
"Sure," Testtube answered with a little shrug, "Someone must've broken in, correct?"
Wait.
No, that wasn't right.
I speak out next, making an audible incorrect buzzer sound with my mouth. "Not correct! Me 'n Painty totally checked that and there were no signs someone broke anythin'."
"You're right!" They agree with me. "There was no signs of forced entry. None of the window were broken, and the door was perfectly intact."
Testtube looked back at them in, what almost looked like shock of having been corrected. "R-right. How did I miss that?"
"So," Goo's squeaky voice broke through again, "someone did use the key? So it had to have been Lightbulb, Paintbrush, Fan, or Testtube, right?"
Silver Spoon scoffed. "We all already know it wasn't Paintbrush," he sneered.
"It was not Lightbulb, if we are assuming Balloon and Nickel are correct," Candle confirmed with certain confidence in her words.
"Though, she was alone as the alarm was going off...."
"Yes. But I do not believe it was her. Do you?"
Candle was remarkably interesting. She spoke with a level off coolness I could only hope to achieve. Even her belief in me was more unshakable than Painty's! She was such a weird character. I liked that.
The sound of paper moving filled the echoey room. "Lightbulb, where did you say you went after you left the picnic?" Cabby asked me. Patience was clear in her voice.
"The hotel."
"Can anyone confirm they saw her there?" She asks the others. She sounded like some judge, only with less judging. She was kinder, I think. I wondered if she ever pulled those files out at parties.
Yinyang gently raises his hand. "We found muddy footprints leading inside. They were not there before we had all left," said Yin.
Clover nods, "That sounds like good evidence to me!"
"Speaking of good evidence," Cabby begins to speak up, "Checking my files, I wrote here that there was a short period of time where Nickel wasn't with you, Clover. Care to explain?"
"Oh," she looked a bit shocked, but agreed. "Nickel went to check on Tea Kettle while we were waiting. I didn't think he saw anything important so I forgot about it, sorry."
"No need to apologize, you told us now," Cabby reassures the girl.
"Nickel, is that true?" Bow asks, on edge at the idea.
"Yes," he admits. "I didn't kill her, but I saw who killed Tea Kettle."
"Didn't you say this last time?" Paintbrush remarked with a disgruntled tone.
"I saw them! When I went to check on Tea Kettle, she was already dead, but in the corner of my eye, I saw a flash of someone yellow running away."
"If that's true, why didn't you say anything to Clover or Balloon?"
"I didn't need to... you gotta believe me! I didn't want her dead, and I swear I saw something!" He began to yell. I thought back to what Painty said about him earlier.
"Why was there blood on your feet then?" I ask.
Nickel looks at me like he'd been caught in a lie, "I don't know! I must've stepped in it!" His uncertainty didn't make his statements seem any more believable.
"IT WAS NICKEL THAT DID IT!" Shouted Yang.
"But how would he know where the key was to get to the hammer?" Goo questions his logic.
"Maybe Lightbulb told him?" Says Yin.
"No way! I wouldn't tell him that!" I yell to the boys.
But still, no one believed what Nickel said except for...
"He's telling the truth!" Yells out Balloon.
"And how do you know this?" Asks Candle.
"I just do. I trust Nickel. I don't think he murdered his friend! You just gotta believe him."
Testtube interjects with her logic, "There's just no evidence-"
"Fuck your evidence!"
"Balloon..." Bow tries to calm him down a little. He was very worked up.
"It was Lightbulb, probably. She's yellow and she had a key." Balloon says, now pointing at me.
"Whoa, hold on!" I squeak out. "Didn't we just agree it couldn't have been me? I have an alibi, remember?!"
Nickel joins in, now that the blame isn't on him, "Easily could've been faked."
"No no, you got the wrong gal! Right Clover? I know you got my back." I smile at her, but she doesn't return it.
"There is evidence against you..." she whimpers.
I turn to Paintbrush, "What about you, Painty? Testy? Fan?? Anyone believe me...?" They all stayed silent. Even Painty, who looked at me with a small smile, but I could tell behind it they didn't fully believe me either.
Seems no one was on my side here. But it wasn't me! I know that, I just need to show them. But how?? No one believes me and I know whatever I say with just fall on deaf ears.
The only thing I can think of is to blame somebody else. Whether it's right or wrong, it needs to have something backing it.
I need to blame somebody else or they'll all vote me. But who? Who still had holes in their alibi?
Couldn't have been Painty or anyone else with them, because they would've seen that person sneak off. That leaves me, Balloon, Nickel, Clover, Testtube, and Fan.
Clover and Balloon have an alibi. There's no real evidence that Nickel did do it, he didn't know where the key was and I certainly didn't tell him.
"It wasn't me, it was Testtube!" I blurt out.
"I- what?" I see her stumble at my words.
I then needed to explain my reasoning. I didn't want to blame Testtube, but it was the only thing I could think to do. "She knew where the key was, and her liquid looks almost yellow in the right lighting."
"That's just ridiculous!" Fan exclaimed with appallment, he wasn't a fan. "And wrong, Testtube was with me the whole time! Besides, she wouldn't do that."
"Care to explain what really happened, then. Fan? Testtube?" Cabby requested.
Testtube abliged with a light nod, "Fan and I, admittedly, did separate from the group right before the timer went off."
"We needed some space, away from all the chaos. You should all know how that feels by now," Fan makes sure to include.
"We spent the whole time together. There's no way one of us killed her without the other knowing."
"Testtube, that's also wrong," Paintbrush corrects her for the second time. "You told Lightbulb and I that Fan went off on his own for a short period of time. Not saying either of you did it, I'm just saying you should know this."
"You're right," Bow agrees with a bounce. She turns to Fan, "Fan, didn't you say you needed to wash off? In the ocean, yeah?"
Goo adds, "That's why you were damp earlier."
Fan looks surprised for a second. "No, your right! I completely forgot about that, haha!" He slaps a hand over his forehead to emphasize his forgetfulness in a silly way.
"But he, of course, came right back. Also, he wasn't gone all that long. Certainly not long enough to kill a person." Testtube nervously tries to explain this all away. I look around the room, curious to see if it was working.
It wasn't.
"But you could've?" Said Silver.
"There is no way we killed her!?" Testtube shouts. She looks around for a sign someone believes her.
"Oh~ now who's defensive?" Nickel taunts.
"I'm not defensive! We. Didn't. Kill her," she glares daggers into the man, but he seems unfazed by her hostil look.
"Only you two knew where the key was, and you both don't have solid alibis if they only rely on eachother," added Balloon.
"Didn't we say someone broke in?" Said Fan.
"Listen," Testtube starts to speak again, her voice extremely seriously, "Fan left to wash off, that's the end of it. He came right back. There's no discussion to be had here!"
I see Paintbrush thinking, before carefully asking, ".....Why did he need to wash off again, Testtube?" They were testing her.
"D-didn't I say? Mud splashed on him."
"That's wrong. You said he spilt a drink on himself," I say.
The room stood silent once again. Testtube had lied, plain and simple. The whole room could see that now.
"A-ah. I-I must have been wrong before, then."
I could see Fan wince, "Testtube...." he gently called her name.
"No. You... he didn't kill anybody."
"So...." Bow hesitated, "if you didn't spill something..... you were washing off blood, weren't you?"
"So, the killer was...."
Painty then turn to gives me a look of confidence. I return it, then clear my throat, "I think I know what happened." I begin to explain the events that took place in order.
"First things first, the motive. A time limit with a loud alarm that would go off in the next 24 hours, for ten minutes. When that time limit was up, if no one was dead, we would all be."
"In the day that followed, me and Paintbrush found a tool shed full of weapons. We feared someone would find this and use it to kill. So, the culprit, Testtube, Paintbrush, and me decided to lock it up."
"Paintbrush hid the key, so only us four knew where it was. Unfortunately, this still wasn't enough to stop a murder."
"The next day, while Paintbrush and the rest of everybody left to find a way off the island, Tea Kettle invited me, Nickel, and Balloon to a picnic. It was short lived, as the alarm began to go off.
I panicked and ran to the hotel to hide. It seems I wasn't the only one, as Balloon and Nickel also left, leaving Tea Kettle alone."
"Meanwhile, the culprit separated themself from the main group, with Testtube by their side."
"It's clear that Testtube knew what what the culprit was going to do. So, when the alarm eventually went off, the killer was able to easily make their move."
"They headed back to the Killer Cabana, grabbed the key, and stole a hammer from its shelf. They then went out to find the closest person to them."
"Since the victim died seconds before the timer was up, the killer must have been in quite the rush. They probably didn't plan to kill anyone at first."
"Tea Kettle just was the closest person around, and so the killer took her life. Leaving behind the murder weapon."
"They almost got caught by Nickel, who was going back to check on Tea Kettle. Thankfully for them, he only saw a blur of yellow."
"The killer then quickly ran off to wash off the blood in the ocean, before returning to the group to pretend to find the body for the first time."
"So, Tea Kettle's killer must be...."
"Fan, isn't it?"
Fan stood there, dumbfounded, but remorseful. I, on the other hand, was proud of myself for putting it all together. By Fan's face, I can tell I got it right.
I was the only one proud right now.
"Fan...." Painty looked mournful, "why? Why would you do this?"
Fan looked down and let out a breathless, nervous chuckle, "For you all. If I didn't, we'd all be dead! I-I couldn't just sit there and let you all die!? I'm.... just sorry I had to kill Tea Kettle to do it..."
"It's not true!" Testtube's broken yell echoed throughout the court room. "You... you didn't kill her! You didn't kill anyone! Fan wouldn't do that! Don't you believe me?! Tell them, Paintbrush. It wasn't him," she whipped her head around, frantically trying to get the others to listen.
Paintbrush didn't say anything back, but Bow did, "It's..... it's going to be okay, Testtube."
She snapped her head to the small girl, "You don't actually believe this, do you!? H-he's clearly lying!"
"No," Fan interrupted her desperate pleas, "Testtube, it's over. Let it go."
"No.... it's not. It can't be?"
"I think its time!" Said the glitchy, imposter of a phone. "Are y'all ready to cast your votes?"
Fan and Bow gently nodded.
"No, we're not ready! It's not over yet! Wait!" Called Testtube.
"Testtube. He admitted it. Fan did it," I say, trying to calm her down, even just a little.
"I did it! I did it! It wasn't him, you got it wrong! You're not listening!!"
Everyone put in their votes, except for Testtube, who continued to beg everyone to stop. But, we all voted for Fan either way.
"DING DING DING!! You got it all right! The killer was Fan, the Ultimate Influencer."
"I'm sorry, Testtube," Fan told her.
"You.... why did I let you do it...? I knew what you would do, and I still let it happen!" Testtube's words were barely coherent over her sobs.
This was new. I don't think I've ever seen Testtube so completely.... broken like this. She was usually pretty logical. Sure, I've seen her be stubborn, and jerk, and angry. But never was she a mess like she was now.
I could see Fan felt the same way.
He stepped off his podium to be closer to hers. He delicately pressed his hands onto the glass of her cheeks and lifted her head to look at him. The cold of her glass sending a shiver through his arm.
"Thank you for letting me save you. Look out for Bow, okay?" He then leaned in and whispered something too quiet for me to hear. Bow looked confused at the mention of her name specifically.
MonoPhone's grin widened at me before saying, "Are you ready?"
"Because it's time..."
"ELIMINATION TIME!!~" (doo doo)
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Fan's POV:
All I could see was complete darkness. Well, that's what I thought until I realized my eyes were closed.
I opened my eyes to bright lights all around me. I was a little disoriented. One second I was with Testtube, the next I... must've been swooped away into my execution room.
That was a upsetting.
I looked around again. I wasn't tied up, but I was on a platform with dull colored tiles beneath me. The platform was slightly elevated.
I looked out to see a few giant, floating screens hovered around the platform.
On the screen directly infront of me had words on it that read, "Fan, the Ultimate Influencer's Execution: The Rise And Fall Of A Star."
"Wha..?"
I took a step backwards, only to have the tile I stepped on light up red. It made a sound and something came flying past my head.
It nearly missed me, taking a nick out of my yellow-painted wood.
As I was making sure that it didn't hit me anywhere else, I felt the platform rise.
"Ready..."
An eerily familiar voice came from the screens speakers.
I turn my head to see on of the screens had a video of someone I knew on it.
Bow! The Bow! Although, she did look a little different than what I remember.
"Go!"
As soon as she uttered that word, music began to play. The tiles on the ground sequentially lit up brighter versions of their colors.
Ah! This was a game! I knew this.
A green tile lit up infront of me. I stepped on it. Then a blue one. Color after color, I pressed each color with the rhythm, preforming to the best of my abilities. Each time I did, the platform would rise, until I was well up into the sky. Good thing I wasn't afraid of heights.
But after a while I began to slow as the music and beat got faster.
I started messing up, and each time I did, I would have to dodge a weapon or two flying near my head. Thankfully, I was able to dodge them all, though the changing colors was hurting my head.
That was until the video of Bow changed to a video of Testtube.
I froze. She began to speak and I began to stumble backwards.
She was talking about the moon.
For a second, I forgot where I was. I stepped back, accidentally pressing my foot on a tile I should've have.
It went by fast, too fast for me to avoid it.
A spear shot up below me, piercing my eye from the front. Pain immediately erupted through my face.
The spear then retracted, sending blood splattering all over the floor. The bright changing colors blurred as I stumbled around.
More pain shot through me as I was impaled again, in the chest. This time I screamed.
As it retracted, I didn't realize I wandered so close to the edge. My foot slipped and went falling.
The last thing I saw before I fell into complete darkness, was Testtube's image on the beaming screen.
Soon, I was in darkness again. I was losing consciousness. I hoped I would die before I hit the ground though.
I didn't want to die.
...
The camera goes dark as Fan's eyes close.
The only thing left is the sound of wood breaking.
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What.
What just happened?? Did Fan just... die? Was this real? Was this what Paintbrush was trying to tell me? Is this what happen to OJ?
Testtube's cries filled the room.
This was.... I didn't like this game.
I clutched Paintbrush's hand as I whispered to myself.
"I'll... miss ya, flying buddy."
I couldn't believe it, but this was real. I could tell by the feeling of Paintbrush's hand. It was real.
I really did just watch my friend be killed infront of me. I suddenly felt bad that I accepted the situation so easily before.
The thought of Testtube or Paintbrush dying in such a brutal way made me sick.
The only thing I wanted in the world right now was to go home with all my friends. Old and new. I wanted to get out of here.
I wanted to get us all home.
--------------------------------------------
When the time limit began, Fan steeled his nerves. He knew what he had to do. If he didn't they would all be dead too. Testtube, Bow, he couldn't let that happen.
"Where are you going?" Testtube called to him as he tried to sneak away.
He was a terrible liar.
"Oh no you don't, Fan!" She yells.
"Testtube, I have to! No one else is going to and I cannot let my friends die on this stupid island!"
"How stupid are you?! There is no way in hell I am ever letting you do this! Who are you going to kill, huh? Lightbulb? Nickel? Do you even know??"
"I'll...." he hesitates, "figure it out when I get there."
"I won't let you do this, Fan! I won't let you kill yourself like this!" She continued to yell but couldn't hold back the tears in her voice.
Fan turns around to hold her hand in his, his other placed on her cheek.
"If I don't do this, Bow will die. You will die. So please, let me save you." He smiled at her. He also has tears in his eyes.
Testtube wanted to point out all the other very logical and reasonable reasons why he shouldn't do this, but she knew his mind was already made up.
With great hesitation, "....F-fine." She whispers. "Don't be stupid and get yourself caught."
"I'm sorry, he says to her before he begins to run in the direction of the cabana.
Dangansanity Chapter 2: It's Not A Phase, Deadly Life, End.