Chapter Text
Papyrus’s mind had been abnormally quiet that afternoon.
Normally his thoughts came in a stream, coherent and steady yet slightly overwhelming. Before, he might have welcomed a break, possibly even a cue to nap. Now… it felt like a void, a missing piece of a puzzle. All he could hear was an untraceable buzz filling every crevice of his mind.
It’d been annoying when it first crept in. He’d just wanted to play his game, and then he felt like shutting it off to do nothing. Then it had fully taken him, and he’d kicked back and relaxed. Nothing bothered him anymore.
He stood up on a sudden impulse and grabbed his jacket off the nearby hanger. He picked up the blanket he’d just been laying under and draped it across his arm. He then went out to the back porch, where he spotted a certain someone.
Icy was sitting on the swing, curled in a ball and lightly shivering. He looked up as he heard the door swing open. Papyrus gave him a gentle smile and sat down beside him. He wrapped his arm around Icy and gently patted his skull with the other.
“hey, snowflake… what’re ya doin’ out here?”
Icy relaxed, a faint grin of his own crossing his face. “...j-jus’... th-thinkin’...”
“thinkin’, huh? what’s goin’ on in that little head of yours?” Papyrus gently booped Icy’s forehead.
Icy giggled softly, then sighed, leaning into Papyrus’s side. “...i-i’s jus’... d-di’n’t sleep well…”
“aw, babybones… how come? nightmares again?” When Icy nodded, Papyrus pulled him into a hug against his chest. “you know you can come find me an’ dad at any time, yeah?”
“…i-i… i know…” he mumbled. “d-di’n’ wanna be a bother…”
“a bother? never, kiddo… it’s all okay, yeah?” Icy nodded again. “we can go take your mind off of it with a little play, huh? then we can go talk to dad when he gets home.”
Icy sat up. “...p-play…?”
”yeah, y’know? snowmen, snowball fights, snow angels, the works?”
“r-really?” Icy’s head perked up.
“yeah, kid. c’mon, get up.” Papyrus gently pushed Icy off of the swing, draped the blanket around the younger’s shoulders, and knelt down in the snow. Icy followed his lead, watching as his big brother began to roll a snowball up. Papyrus couldn’t remember the last time little Icy looked so at peace, and it warmed him… though not as much as he thought it should have.
Soon, Papyrus had finished the base, and Icy was nearly done with the middle. Papyrus watched carefully and, when Icy was ready, lifted it onto the base. He then began to guide Icy’s hands to form a head.
“i-i… w-wanna lift… p-please…?”
“heh, ok. but grab it nice and firm, yeah?” Papyrus made sure Icy had a strong grip on the snowball before raising him up to place it. He watched Icy’s pupils shift into blue stars as he was set down.
“i-it’s… pretty…”
Papyrus chuckled, yet it came out more hollow than usual. “why don’tcha go find some stones for eyes, a mouth, and buttons? oh, and maybe sticks for arms.”
Icy nodded, scurrying off to follow instructions. As Papyrus supervised him, his soul felt colder than its usual blazing inferno of warmth and love, instead touched with a chill. He should have felt so proud, and yet he felt… nothing. He crossed his arms. The buzzing was back, more intense than before. He’d been perfectly fine a week ago, so what was wrong with him now?
Icy returned, snapping him out of his thoughts. He forced a smile. “just stones, huh?”
“y-yeah… ‘m-m s-sorry, papy…”
“hey, it’s alright, ice. let’s put ‘em on, huh? besides, the greatest snowmen don’t need arms.” Icy let out a soft chuckle as he passed the stones to Papyrus, and Papyrus placed them on the snowman arranged just as he’d told Icy moments ago. Icy clapped quietly, then wrapped his little arms around Papyrus’s waist. Papyrus patted him on the head, his smile faltering.
“aw, ice… you’re shiverin’. is it porch time?”
Icy gave a sleepy nod. Papyrus scooped him up and went back to the porch, sitting on the swing. The buzzing somehow became even louder now. He couldn’t focus on the little form in his arms, only on a distant point he didn’t realize existed. The fake smile had been wiped off his face now that Icy’s face was pressed into his hoodie.
“p-papy…?” Icy’s voice was muffled, yet so joyful.
Papyrus looked down. “yeah?”
“...i-i love you…”
Papyrus looked back at the distant point. “...i love you too, little bro.”
His hand had begun to rub Icy’s head. His words felt like a pure lie, though he knew they weren’t supposed to. Icy deserved better than whatever empty husk he was becoming. And yet… A part of the fuzz had dissipated, leaving one instruction clear. He found his magic manifesting a bone behind Icy’s back, sharper than he’d ever seen.
Then he swiftly grabbed it and drove it right into Icy’s soul.