Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Starscream couldn't count...

He couldn't count the cycles that passed by since that battle with the Decepticons and Autobots occurred on Earth. When was it? The thought made his processor vibrate and ache. It wasn't time that entertained him, though. It was the sole memory that out of everyone in that battle, it was MEGATRON who ended up killing him. He doesn't know what he did. He's pretty sure his plans were in the same tone as the ones he made against the Decepticon leader that still had him getting away scott free. But then maybe that was the last straw? Unexpected yet... not surprising. 

It doesn't take a click for Starscream to be reminded again. He's dead. Primus, he's dead. His body broke into pieces when he died. It broke and scattered around like some cheap metal found in the land fills in any world that exists in the universe. He couldn't even see the way Megatron shot him. He was looking away in that battlefield when he heard a blast and a wave coming his way. As he looked back and greeted by the fire from the fusion cannon and Megatron standing with his arm stretched out in an aim. And it broke. 

It's weird how you can hear your body get destroyed before even feeling it. But before the seeker could think deeper, his processors ache again. Why was his body aching anyway? He's dead. He's a ghost. These things shouldn't be- 

Oh, Starscream is reminded again. That's right, he's in a body. A body of flesh and squishy frames. He's in pain because he's now human. Or at least, currently IN a human. He doesn't know how or why it happened. But this memory was something he called "safe," as recalling it didn't bring him pain. To make it short and sweet, during the aftermath of the battle, around 3 cycles later, Starscream found himself as a ghost. That ghost would wander around the land of Earth before making the mistake of being curious about how humans are formed and made that he ended up getting sucked into a newborn human sparkling when his ghost peered a little TOO CLOSE over a hospital room full of unsuspecting group of humans. He remembers screaming that day as he was pulled into an unfamiliar world. 

If Shockwave was here, he'd label it as "illogical." Because it was! How did he end up like this? In the body of a human sparkling? A FEMALE HUMAN TO BE EXACT? The system of Cybertronians in their sex was very similar in a way to each other that they never had to worry about anything. But a human? Oh, it grows, it grows, and it's painful. It's horrifying, and it's disgusting. The male and females are so different, there's a whole learning system about it. How did such filthy species even grow to be so... advanced in their own way? He doesn't want to dive into that. Otherwise, he'll just get mad. 

The body he's currently living in is not a human sparkling anymore, though. Or baby, as he learned. It's not, for those events happened years or cycles ago. So this body has grown a bit, currently 10, as he counts based on the units of time on Earth. This body, this girl, Starscream, is currently sitting in the room of her abode, her home. She's on her bed, which is how humans call their own berth as he learned. He lays there in that body, looking up to the ceiling, the light of the bedroom shining across the optics of the body. On the side is the study desk, and on it is a notebook with a test attached to it, left blank for hours now. He has to finish it somehow, or the teacher in school will scold this body, scold her, and scold HIM. But he can't help but feel glued to the blankets of the berth- uh... bed.

Starscream never expected it to be like this. Out of every absurd and weird outcome that would greet him for every single absurd and weird plan he makes about being the top in the Decepticon ranks, being human was NOT IN IT. He lays there with her, the body for a long time, spacing out into a universe the processors of this body made, until he was stopped by a voice he completely forgot to acknowledge.

"Can you please stop that?"

Chapter Text

"Can you please stop that?"

Ah, how stupid did Starscream feel. To forget that he isn't the only one occupying this body. Turns out that being sucked into a newborn human's body didn't automatically make that body yours. The soul was apparently still inside, only growing in the same rate as the body was developing. Starscream groans and looks at her in his(her? Their?) Head. 

"Let me imagine and remember moments. I'm the one in control, HUMAN, " he says at her with a mocking tone. This earned him a huff and an angry pout from the girl. 

"It's my body! And I'm asking you to respect it!" She furrows her eyebrows and crosses her arms. "You spacing out leads me to lots of scary memories that aren't even mine. I hate it. Why are you like this?" She asks. Starscream huffed, he glares at the human girl, she's so annoying and thinks she is the best in the world with what she does. It should be him asking her. Though her attitude, it hit close to home for him. But before Starscream could reply, he remembers again. But this time, it does not affect him nor the little girl. 

Being in this body taught Starscream one thing, is that the host is young, her body is young. She's been alive for only decade in human years. Applying her age in Cybertronian years and point it at the seeker, then in that situation this girl would've learned A LOT by now. How to fight, how to manage a crew, battle strategies, she may even have learned how to kill. But that is not the reality Starscream is facing right now. For he learned that in human years, a ten-year-old human is still learning how this world works. 

Being ten in human years means you're still discovering hobbies, developing your motor skills, learning how to socialize, and maybe a growing defiance for authority. Starscream keeps it in mind that this human is STILL growing. And it's her body so it's him who will be held accountable for any damage as he is currently the one in control. He never thought he'd be a parasite inside a pest, a species that held as a weak link to the Autobots. But looking at her again, that pout, that angry face, he remembers that in a way, the reality is there. She is young. Young, and entering a new phase in human age (EHEM...puberty). And currently going through a phase where she feels like the world's princess. 

So, Starscream has no choice but to swallow his pride. Primus, he's already dead, what more could he gain or lose from this? And mutter out an apology, "I'm sorry. I'll try to tone it down for both of us." It doesn't take that long for him to feel the void of their mind shift with her response, "It's okay. Just don't do it again!"

There's a short moment of silence before she asked again, "When are we going to finish my homework? I have to sleep at nine." There was another thing about this human child. As annoying as she is in this stage, this girl is diligent and always on point with the things needed to do. Almost like a certain Decepticon he knows. He looks at her, optics of red, glowing. Glowing in a way that he was examining her expression and her tone. Yeah, this girl wants things done now. 

"A little later pest, let me lay down a bit. I've been spending time doing all the work while you stay in your seat watching from here."

"HEY! I do things too like uh... STUDY THEN WHILE YOU DO WHATEVER uhh... STUFF!" And being ten also means still learning new vocabulary.

They would then be called by the girl's mother not long later for dinner, and Starscream had no choice but to go back to the "control panels", get up from the bed and go finish whatever that is needed to be done. 

He might as well start getting used to it now. 

Chapter Text

Star is her name, the body. It's what her parents, or creators named her. Her name was merely a strange coincidence, but it at least, gave Starscream an easier time adapting. Mention her name and Starscream immediately knew this girl AND him were being called. Being sucked into this world, Starscream learned about her from the words exchanged by the people surrounding them. For instance, he had to learn how to act like a human sparkling during those days as Star's mental consciousness was still developing. He also learned a few things about human sparklings that are VERY different to newborn Cybertronians. Like sitting upright on the neonatal crib as a newborn would have you be greeted by your parents wearing shock, amazement, and panic on their faces. Nurses and doctors were amazed at the sight. From one of the nurse's explanation, it was normal for a newborn human to lift their head despite it being rare. But to sit? Another level. Okay, duly noted, newborn humans can't sit or walk around. That day, he learned the word "baby".

A day after Star was born, Starscream discovered that this girl was not the only child made by these two humans. Star had a sister who came to visit her parents with her grandparents the next day. Solar was her name, the sun. Solar was gentle but energetic at the same time. Starscream can't recall the whole thing it but he remembers Solar prancing around the room with excitement over the fact that she has a sister now. And the gentle touches she carried when she was checking in on Star. This poor girl, oblivious to the fact that her newborn sister had an alien's ghost possessing her and it's aware of all the things she does and say.

Being a baby was a form of torture when you're fully aware of your surroundings. The words Starscream wanted to say would end up as babbles and angry tantrums. The parents? Would just look at their child with tired but loving eyes. "Oh, Star what's wrong? Are you hungry again? Ah, but you just drank from Mommy's milk," the father coos petting his daughter who wore an angry face, the seeker's doing. He wasn't hungry! Just being fed as a baby already sucked! Why do they do that? Why are mammals like this? So many questions he begged to ask but no answer would spare him from it. 

Despite "doing the bare minimum", Starscream made Star a challenge to raise. His constant frustrations on the fact that he's dead and stuck in the current reality that he's in led to Star throwing tantrums and crying in moments where no one knew the cause of a the baby being upset. Crying from the universe and back, Starscream's frustrations and Star's tantrums were only then settled after the girl's parents bought a music box. He called them pathetic, but a pull from the mindscape made the body settle down in peace. He tried to fight it but it was too strong. And like a baby, he was lulled into recharging.

Star was one when Starscream controlled the "panels" in her brain into moving around. She was situated in a walker in real life, and her speech had glimpses of words into it. It wasn't clear (being a toddler and all), yet but the actions Starscream commanded with the body helped in communicating with the adults. And Starscream discovered this is also the stage where most humans undergo "training" with their essential needs. Specifically, waste disposal with the help of Star's mother. Starscream has never felt so many things so wrong at the same time. In this year, Starscream swore he heard a voice call him somewhere in this child's mindscape. Because he could've sworn he did not call Star's mother "mama" when she was being fed. But maybe he did? He just forgot. 

Star was three when Starscream was FINALLY able to talk in full and understandable sentences. Though still shaky, it made people understand what he was trying to say, thank Primus. The moment she was able to talk, Star appeared in front of him in the mindscape. Starscream never thought it was the possible but the owner of the body he was currently staying in still existed. He didn't steal her place, she was just here, developing and growing with her body, and now has grown a consciousness. First time they met, she screamed and tried to run in the void. Until she realized she couldn't and kept crying, and decided to pass out. And Starscream, well, was bummed out by the fact that he wasn't the only pilot in this body. 

Star was four when Starscream introduced himself to her. Told her he was her "imaginary friend" and that he was her "guardian", good thing children are so easily swayed because she fully believed it. And four was where Star's life began. The memories started rolling in for the girl. She sat on the throne of her mind while the "imaginary friend" she had sat as the pilot. There was a memory that marked deep within Star that reminded her of the day she turned four. Her birthday party that was held in her family's farm. She has never felt more happy that time, and Starscream has never seen so much decorations and explosions (exaggerated, they're just party poppers) in one place, he always envisioned those things to be found in conquering places or battles. Four was where he and Star learned her full name after overhearing her parents filling up papers to enroll her to pre-school.

"Star Strillare Arias."

An odd choice of names from her parents. Starscream assumed that Arias was some kind of clan name like those humans those Autobots befriended, he remembers Witwicky was one of them. "Family name!" Star exclaimed, which had him looking at her with wonder. Family name. A mark of which group of humans did you originated? Born? Raised? He was curious again. It was an easy decision on his part on the days that followed, that Star would be in control of her body for a while. Since she was still starting her life, why not let her experience it inserted of just watching? He's been here since she was born what's the worse that could go? The next thing he heard was Star practicing how to say her full name.

Star was five when she finished her pre-school and enrolled in kindergarten. The staff in that school were impressed at the foundation of how much she has learned that instead of exposing her to the first years of kindergarten, they advanced her to the second (advantage being Starscream who also learned along the way during pre). Star was playful, but also quiet, she liked being a "good girl" because that's what her parents tell her.

The Seeker, however, just grumbles at her goody goody. Star was prominent in language, and liked to draw, Starscream thought they were ugly but there was still room to grow, right? Star discovered that she liked to dance and sing from the shows aired in TV. Everytime her favorite song comes, she's always coaxing Starscream into joining her, who in return, whines but does it anyway. Around half of the year in Star's five-year-old life, news came in that her mother was carrying again. Starscream was baffled at this, the child on the other hand was overjoyed. Another sibling? She's going to be a big sister like her older sister. The year involved mostly with Star spending time with her mother who was on a maternity leave from her job, and Starscream studying the process of forming a new human. He never thought he would but he's here. 

And he doesn't know how to feel about witnessing the process that led him to be in this body in the first place. 

And it doesn't even occur to him that he has focused so much about human life, he hadn't thought about the current state of the Decepticons with him gone. 

Chapter Text

Witnessing pregnancy with their own eyes/optics, both Star and Starscream were in awe about the concept of a human coming from an individual, Starscream more so.

"This is how we are made, you look more surpised than I am Screamy," Star says as they both stand in the her mindscape. Starscream cursed at himself with how observant Star was despite her very young age. Was he in awe? Admittedly, yes, Cybertronian systems in creating a new individual was a complicated process, and this so. 

"It's just, weird. Back in my planet, we don't have this kind of thing..." It takes Starscream time to realize that he was explaining the process of how Cybertronians are formed to a girl no younger than five. It takes him time to realize that he has ran his mouth for more than he could realize. He only snapped out of it when Star spoke.

"Another planet? THAT'S SO COOL! I thought you were just my imaginary friend from the airplanes I see but you have a story too!" Starscream froze at that, he has said more than he should've, it's terrifying, but Star only mistakes his story for a made up one that she made from her imagination. Thank Primus human children are smart and dumb at the same time. "Frag, gotta watch what I say before I end up spilling something to her," he makes a mental note (mental? IN A MENTAL MINDSCAPE? Yeah just go with it).

In the 9th month of the same year, Star's mother gave birth to another daughter. They named her Lunaris, the moon. "Huh, this couple sure loves naming their children after celestial bodies" Starscream mutters, currently in control of Star's body while Star watches the sight of her baby sister sleeping from the throne of her mind.

"She's so cute! I can't believe I'm a big sister. And Solar is a big BIG sister!" Star grins with wonder and awe. Lunaris was a cute baby, that is not a lie. She had plump red cheeks, a cute nose and a comfortable swaddle that wrapped around her with warmth. It's Starscream's first time seeing a newborn human where he is not being sucked inside their body and into their consciousness. 

Humans were small, Starscream he just never thought of how smaller they could be. Maybe it's because he's big, that every human looks the same to him. Maybe it's because he never thought about thinking that deeper into their species, all he thought about them is how squishy and crushable they look. But right now, he's seeing it in the eyes of a human, Star's eyes. Squishy part still stands, but they can be even more squishy. He doesn't realize that he has stopped navigating Star's body when he hears the voice of Star's mother. 

"Aw look at you my dear Star, getting to know your baby sister?" The sweet and tired voice of her mother asks. She pets her child's head, and Starscream feels it. "Be careful there, baby, you're leaning into the crib, you might fall onto Lunaris," and he didn't even realize that he was until he felt the weight of Star's body on her arms. Thinking quickly, he responds, "O-oh. Mama. I'm sorry. She's just so cute." He turns her head to look at the mother who gives her a smile.

"I understand, Star but you can adore your sister from here," she says while pulling a chair for her to sit on. Starscream was caught up with the quietness of the environment that he didn't notice Star behind him already asleep in their Midscape. He didn't notice just how much time he spent looking at Lunaris.

Star was six when she started making a big number of friends. Star would tell Starscream which one she wanted to by friends with and he'd do the rest. He didn't know why he was doing it, but since it was a bit entertaining (not that he'd ever admit it), he went along with it. Unfortunately, this age was also where the two discovered that Star is a slow reader. Not just a slow reader, she cannot say a full sentence without stuttering. "I thought you were good at your Earthly language," he gestures at her who only pouted at him. 

"I can't help it, they're big words!"

"It's five sentences,"

"Sentences..."

"Scrap, don't tell me you don't know sentences,"

Star can only grin at him from that. A servo to his head, Starscream sighs, "I'm over here letting you take control so you can experience school and you can't even give me an answer, have you even learned anything?" "I'm six years old, go easy on me!" It's hard to read a paragraph, and it's also hard to understand the age range and capabilities of another species.

When you're Cybertronian, the ability to read just gets implanted on you. Luckily, the slow reading issue was visible in the real world that Star's parents decided to buy a Phonics book for Star to train her reading skills. Needless to say it worked, and Starscream could not believe it. 

Star was seven years old when her skills in the arts grew. She found out about traditional and digital art which made her popular amongst her peers. Her terrific dancing made her stand out from practices for how good she was. Thanks to her sister, Solar who took pride in Star's dancing skills and showed it off to her peers, the older students of the school praised her and raised her up in the air (literally and metaphorically) like she was their own little sister.

Star had an era where she had a crown, and Starscream felt all the feelings that were being felt with every praise, every conpliment, and every offer of performed towards the girl. It was weird, he wasn't the one being given those offers yet the feeling of being praised hit him. Before the year passed, Star was chosen for a junior child pageant that was meant for a school event about Science and health. She won, and she wore a crown, Star complained about its weight but it transcended its physical mass to feel it around Starscream's helm. And he never wanted to pass it to anyone else. 

"I like this crown"

"It's heavy, ugh it hurts,"

"Sucks to be you and your weak head,"

"That's mean!"

Eight years old, Star got into theater. Well, her sister, Solar got her into theater. She didn't get the concept of it at first but with the help from the older students, she joined. She was the lead role of a children's musical, and Starscream didn't see the appeal until Star had performed through her best. There, Starscream discovered that his charms and manners of showing off, can apply to the arts of performing. 

Nine years old, Star started sensing changes in her. Starscream felt these changes, most of them felt painful. Thankfully, Star's mother saw this coming from a mile away and decided to lecture her about puberty and what to look out for. Starscream leaned...A LOT. The whole lecture didn't shake Star that much until a small knack (or a pimple) grew on her chin one day. It annoyed her, she felt ugly, Starscream thought it felt like being bitten by a scraplet and that scraplet just decided to leave instead of devouring them. In other words, he also hated it. 

"Ugh, what is this mound on your face? It's ugly, like rust"

"Stop it, I hate it too!"

Star's mother informed her that she shouldn't touch it or it will leave a mark. Too bad Starscream was the one listening that day and decided to pop it late at night. Only then he also found out that they also carry blood and did in fact, leave a mark. Just HOW GREAT human anatomy and physiology can be?!

The growth came next, Star got taller and even more so than her older sister, Solar. The poor girl's has never felt her pride more crushed than seeing her younger sister tower over her. Star was now relaxed and calm than he thought she would. He didn't know that's the calm before the storm. 

And then the current point. Ten years old. It's only been a year and Star did a 180 on her attitude. Rude, annoying, insufferable. What's worse? She's unaware of it! She thinks she's being so cool about it as well. It only started around last year when her parents heard Solar crying in her room. Upon investigating the cause of her distress, Solar told them that since graduating from hers and Star's current school and transferring, she has been falling behind on classes in her new school. Which would've been something else except when she added that she didn't know a gist of any of the topics being talked about in there. Solar was a top student during her time on Star's school and has won multiple academic awards for her performance and grades, her cards did not lie about it.

Hearing this, her parents stopped in their tracks with their future plans for their daughters. Seeing the state of their eldest, they took a look into their other two daughters. Instead of letting Star and Lunaris continue their education in such school, they decided to transfer them to another school in the same town that had a good reputation in taking in special classes that offered an education in advanced classes to prepare for the year level after them. Star took this with pride, heard "advanced classes" and thought she was finally one of the smart and cool kids. Starscream had to tell her no, but his words only fell to deaf ears for the girl. 

"Oh please, when they see how much of a leader I became, they'll praise me! I transferred out of that school and got in a better one. Their star dancer is no more! That girl has fallen and she's here on top!" Star declared smugly. Ouch, now where did Starscream hear that tone before? Though it was true, upon hearing the news of the Arias family transferring their daughters out of the school to one known for their outstanding curriculum, a number of families did the same for their children. Though majority of Star's friends remained in that school. Did she miss them? Maybe, but pride was masking it.

"And why would I care about them? That's their fault and their parents' decision to make them stay. Solar's pain already spoke. I have new friends here, and plus Gale is here," she gestures to the girl sitting next to her in the physical world. Gale has been her classmate since kindergarten and a friend, she was actually transferred before Star, the girl only followed. 

"Plus, we get to talk more about how that school held is back." Starscream wanted to yell at her so bad. She's beginning to sound like him and it takes him to another level of rage. What happened to the curious girl who liked playing with toys and imagination? This isn't her at all. Was she learning from his mannerisms and way of speaking? Absolutely not! Those are marked "Starscream only", why is she being like this? 

Cycles after cycles. Star turns either better or worse, he remembers her mother's lectures about puberty and how behavioral changes might be present in it. He hopes it's the case for this. No, he's not being soft on her, he just hates that someone in this void is copying a masterpiece that is him. "No, just stop, go back to being that annoying but bearable human sparkling!" He silently begs. If there's one individual who gets to act like a king, it's him. It should be him. 

Once again, it doesn't occur to him that his begging for her to change back is rooted deep down in how he's known her all those years. It's been a decade, and he doesn't notice it.

Star is a decade old now, and Starscream has slowly taken her mind as a home.