Chapter Text
Hunter gaped, "The what?!"
Sajaun paid him no mind, her eyes taking on a vaguely distant look as she stumbled away from them and into one of the halls fumbling for the light switch. Hunter frowned following her slowly. She seemed like she was in her own little world almost tripping over her own feet as she bumbled towards a set of controls on the wall.
Her movements were sluggish and haphazard sloppy like a cadet that had just gotten out of interrogation 1 class. All the fatigue and wear and tear crashing into her now it seemed as she thumbed at the buttons on the panel.
Hunter bit back pointing out that she'd been unconscious thirty minutes ago and recovering from getting crushed 12 hours ago as a tilted staircase lowered from the ceiling.
"What are you doing?" Tech asked from behind Hunter, his voice laced with alarm.
"They answered, I- I-ve seen it- the causation-" Sajaun stumbled over words even as she pushed on grasping the railing with white knuckles.
Hunter had a feeling she wasn't supposed to be on her feet right now let alone vertical the way she was swaying. His brain noted that she'd warned them not to go up to the third floor but when she swayed dangerously to the side and almost fell down the stairs Hunter moved without thinking to steady her.
She slipped out of his grasp and continued towards the door at the top of the stairs unheeded of him or the others onboard. It was like she didn't even register that they were there. Hunter shoved the part of him that said he shouldn't follow upstairs to where he had been told not to go and scrambled after her.
Entering that third floor was unlike anything he'd ever seen. It was floor-to-ceiling shelves where they came up, items of both value and unknown origin filling the shelves. Sajuan's words that there were dangerous things up here rang in Hunter's head as picked his way through the halls of artifacts as he tried to find Sajaun.
For someone who was teetering on passing out or having a mental breakdown, she was fast .
Hunter finally found her a row over craving her head up murmuring over and over again in that language she'd spoken earlier. They really needed to learn that.
Her eyes traced over the shelves with unnatural precision considering her unsteady state. She was looking for something, Hunter realized. The word she was mumbling was probably the name or the ID tag and the way she was scanning, it was somewhere on that shelf.
"Sajaun?" Hunter asked quietly, unsure if he would get a response. He didn't.
He looked over his shoulder to find his brothers standing there with varying looks of worry on their faces. Sajaun stopped murmuring and scanning. Hunter looked back and traced her gaze to one of the top shelves, a large wooden black box.
She reached out and grasped the shelf in front of her and put her foot on the bottom shelf- Hunter grabbed her shoulder quickly, " Sajaun."
She jerked in surprise at his touch and haltingly looked over at him, eyes glazed over in some sort of hazy disconnect. Hunter waited a moment trying to name sure she was comprehending him, "What do you need? One of us will get it. You shouldn't be climbing."
She blinked at him and for a moment he thought for sure that she hadn't heard a word he'd said but then she let go of the shelf and pointed up at the box tucked behind something that looked like a backpack with metal tentacles coming out of it, "Box."
"I got it," Tech said quickly scrambling up the support of the shelf and grabbing the arm-length box, and handing it carefully down to Wrecker.
Sajaun's limit seemed to be reached as she sagged against Hunter, energy draining away. The adrenaline from whatever she'd done with Wrecker was finally fading.
"Come on," Hunter said softly, guiding her body which was now nearly completely limp against him back towards the stairs, "Let's head downstairs."
She still wasn't completely acknowledged in them but at least she wasn't fighting them. Getting her back down to the 2nd level and into the living area was concerning easy. It was like she wasn't even fully there.
Hunter carefully sat her down in the booth area around the table and put a blanket around her as he would with one of his brothers before looking over at them.
"What was that?" Crosshair hissed, sounding no small amount freaked out.
"I believe it was a product of Force exhaustion." Tech said quietly consulting his datapad, "At least the unresponsiveness. The other symptoms are not listed here."
"I'd say she'd be exhausted." Wrecker said in a stage whisper as he set the box down on a chair trying to be quieter, "What she did seemed tiring."
"What exactly did she do ?" Cross asked suspiciously.
Hunter cut in quickly, "We can deal with that in a moment right now we need to figure out what to do with her. I don't feel comfortable putting her to bed the way she is."
"I'm pulling up her medical file she gave us," Tech decided typing away, "Perhaps that will be of use."
"And I'm okay." Wrecker said looking at Crosshair, "Promise." Crosshair didn't seem pleased with the answer but he didn't push.
"Got it." Tech said looking over what Hunter assumed was Sajuan's medical file, "It says here that her force exhaustion varies in intensity. It also says that to help we need tea, headphones, a weighted blanket, and in the case of extreme fatigue Force dampeners."
Hunter thought the list sounded very strange but didn't mention it and instead looked around, "She's got the blanket, any ideas about the other stuff?"
"Tea should be in the kitchen," Crosshair reasoned, "That's what the other Jedi were arguing about earlier right?"
"It says here spare headphones are in the cockpit and Force dampeners are in the medbay." Tech read off.
"Wrecker, stay with her. I'll take the medbay." Hunter ordered. Tech and Crosshair shot off also for their destinations.
Hunter punched the medbay level on the lift and waited impatiently for the left to come to life. Over the years he'd gotten good at taking care of his brothers. Seeing their weaknesses and covering them with his strengths. Knowing their ticks, habits, and dislikes.
But now with Sajaun, he felt wholly out of his depth. He was starting from scratch learning her ways. In the short time he'd known her she had somehow endeared herself to him as his brothers had. He wasn't saying it was anywhere near as protective or familiar with her as he was with his vode, but seeing her listless and unresponsive sent a shot of concern and panic through him that he didn't have with just anyone.
The lift let him out onto the sterile white floor of the medbay. Suddenly at a loss of where to look Hunter began methodically ruffling through the drawers. Medicine, bandages, IVs, surgical tools.
He finally found a box labeled Force Meds. Ripping it open he found a bunch of different items, blankets, tea, a zipper case of syringes prefilled with a yellow liquid, Force dampening bracelets, and much more. Hunter replaced the lid and took the bin back up with him.
"Found this." Hunter said quietly setting the box down on the kitchen counter where Cross and Tech were rummaging through the cabinets, "Any luck?"
"I found the earphones but we are unable to figure out which tea to use," Tech explained nodding at the basket overflowing with numerous different teas.
"Well I found this," Hunter popped the lid off, "And it has tea in it."
Tech was next to him in an instant looking over the bin's contents carefully, "And directions." Tech took the lid which Hunter then noticed had writing on it. "It says to start with a warm blanket, hot tea, and earphones." Tech read off.
Hunter carefully pulled the provided blanket out of the bin and spotted a dial on the edge of it, "Heated blanket. Huh."
Flipping it on low he turned to find Sajaun leaning on Wrecker who was sitting stone still eyes wide. Smiling a bit at the show of trust from Sajaun, Hunter leaned over and tucked the blanket around both their laps.
"What do I do? " Wrecker hissed in Hunter's ear.
Hunter smiled trying not to be amused with the situation or Wrecker's panic, "You're doing fine Wreck. Just relax."
Cross had found an electric teapot that was bubbling away getting the water boiled while Tech scanned the rest of the directions. "It says to plug the headphones into this music storage device." Tech held up a small electronic box, "And select 'soothing tunes' before putting it on shuffle."
Tech followed the directions and then reached over Wrecker to put the earphones in. Sajaun blinked after a moment when they were in like she was waking up.
"What's it say about the tea?" Cross asked, holding the now boiling hot kettle.
"It says one bag in boiling water for three minutes." Tech read off.
Crosshair carefully followed the directions before setting the sweet-smelling cup in front of Sajaun.
She blinked down at it face first, getting the brunt of the steam as inhaled the faint smell of flowers and fruit. The tension in her shoulders eased and she was clearly much more aware with each second the earphones and tea were working as she slowly looked up.
"Sorry." Her voice was barely a whisper and Hunter could tell she was very tired. It reminded him of when he got an overload the few times he'd been without his bandanna.
"What was that?" Hunter asked as quietly as possible.
Sajaun still winced at his words and pressed her earphones deeper into her ears, "Feedback. Like when you electrocute yourself. First, you touch the live current and then it flows into you and hurts. Just give me a minute. I'll be okay."
Hunter couldn't help but look over at his brothers as she sat there, eyes closed, earphones in, nose practically in her mug as the tension slowly melted from her. He felt like he was at a loss of how to help or what to do but she sat back up soon after sipping her tea like she hasn't just been unresponsive a moment ago.
"You said feedback," Tech said slowly, "Like Force exhaustion?"
"Yes." Sajaun nodded, "Very good. When we Force users access the Force we literally reach out and become a conduit for the flow of energy. And the same way electrical conduits become taxed so do we. But with training, we bounce back faster. I'll be fine tomorrow morning."
"What was so taxing?" Cross demanded harshly. Hunter knew it was just the concern talking but for those who didn't know it sounded threatening.
"Well, I went straight from the Observatory into Wrecker's dream without enough rest. And I haven't dealt with the trauma of healing myself from 2 days ago. Really this was my fault. I know my limits and I pushed them. I should have warned you that might happen." Sajaun shrugged, already looking a lot better if not tired.
"Anything else we should know?" Hunter asked filing all the information she was giving them away for later.
"Alright," Sajuan nodded, setting her mug down, "What do you want to know?"
"What do we do if it happens again?" Tech asked pulling up a list on his datapad to take notes.
"Right, so this wasn't a very bad moment. They can get a lot worst. But the key to remember is that when this happens all my senses are dialed way high, beyond what normal beings can comprehend. So I use different things to try and distract my senses." She held up the edge of her blanket, "Weighted blanket to ground my touch." She held up her tea, "light tea for taste and smell."
"Earphones for your hearing," Cross nodded, catching the drift.
"And the Force Dampeners?" Hunter asked, "Wouldn't think you'd want to be cut off from the Force."
"No, they don't cut me off from it, they just, muffle it. Like how the earphones made it seem quieter but still there. The Force is like my sixth sense and the dampeners are what keep it from overwhelming me. So no, I don't like using them that often but yeah if it gets really bad, I'll use them." Sajuan explained, "The blockers cut you completely off and they are not fun."
"Anything else we should do?" Tech asked, taking notes rapidly.
"The basic list is: earphones with music, blanket, food, water, and sleep in that order and in large amounts for how exhausted I am. The Force Dampeners are a last resort." Sajaun listed.
"I take it you don't need them now?" Hunter asked, holding up the bin.
Sajaun smiled, "No I'm good. I think I'll finish my tea and then go to sleep."
"Alright." Hunter nodded, putting the bin under the kitchen island on a shelf.
"Can I ask you a question?" Tech asked, frowning at his datapad.
Sajaun raised an eyebrow over her mug, "You already did but sure, let's hear it."
"What did you mean, you're not like other Jedi?" Tech asked bluntly, "When you healed yourself you said you weren't one. So what are you?"
Sajaun smiled, "Ah, an interesting question." She grabbed the spoon she had used to stir her tea with and balanced it on her finger horizontally, "The Force exists in balance, the Jedi are one side of this balance, the Sith the other. I'm the one in between. Bendu."
"I'm confused," Wrecker said.
Sajaun chuckled, "As many are." She grabbed a paper cup sitting on the table and cut the bottom ring off it with a knife Hunter wasn't sure where it came from, "Some of the greatest Force wielders to ever live don't understand it. But I've lived longer than many eons and I've figured it out." She rolled the circle of paper down the table only for it to fall over, "But to explain it you must understand the basic laws of motion. Something in motion will stay in motion unless a greater force stops it. Something at rest will stay at rest unless something changes that. It's a balance. Just like how a wheel works."
Hunter handed her the circle of paper as he sat down at the table and she placed it on its side so it stood without help, "Think of this as the universe. The motion of going forward," She brushed it and it rolled a little before it fell over, "Is time."
"It doesn't keep going that well," Tech commented, engrossed with her words as he leaned forward in his seat eager.
"No. It doesn't, not without two opposing forces pressing it from both sides." Sajaun agreed. She gently rolled the circle in front of her, gently tapping it on each side to keep it upright. This way it kept rolling off the table.
"Those two forces are called Ashla and Bogan. The ancient name for the type of force the Jedi and Sith use. And that conflict is what causes the universe to go on. It exists without beings even influencing, life and death, creation and destruction. But it exists in a perfect balance of all these forces working together to keep it going. Balanced. Bendu. The one in the middle."
I am not a Jedi, I do not believe peace and denying oneself emotion is right. But I am not a Sith, I do not believe actions filed by anger are right. You cannot be caged by tradition, you cannot be ruled by rage. You have to be something in between." Sajaun said simply.
"But then how are you part of the Jedi Order?" Tech frowned puzzling over the facts at hand.
"I was part of the Order generations ago before I realized we were not what we should be. But the Sith are gone and there is no one left to check in with as the years fly by. And beings need companionship." Sajaun said softly.
"Yes," Crosshair agreed softly, "They do."
"Then what is the Force?" Wrecker asked, "I mean I get it's an energy but what does it do ?"
"That's a very big question Wrecker. It had a slightly confusing answer." Sajaun picked the paper circle back up, "But the best way to explain it is with the types of energy. What are some types of basic energy you learn about in science?"
"Light?" Wrecker tried.
"Yes," Sajaun nodded, becoming more animated, "Light is one kind. We also have potential energy and kinetic energy, right?"
"Right, basic Physics." Cross agreed, putting his elbows on the table, watching intently.
"And with those types of energy they change from one kind to another, never adding or subtracting, just changing, right?" Sajaun explained with the ease of someone who'd given the same speech a thousand times.
"That would be correct." Tech agreed.
"Right, so there are four types of energy we call the Force. And they are all connected, changing into each other constantly like a cycle. There's the Physical Force, which is things like the Midi-Chlorians in Force user's blood, and the active parts of Force relics, the part that actually does things and shows up scientifically." Sajaun rolled the circle a little moving it along.
"That when used cycles into the Living Force which is in everything, a baseline current in everyone and everything. And when someone dies that energy goes into the Cosmic," She rolled the circle again.
"That's the stuff that acts like gravity holding the galaxy and universe together. Then it cycles into the Unifying. Now Unifying is a bit tricky but the best way to describe it is the flow of time. Past present and future being held together. It's what gives certain Jedi different abilities depending on how they can access it. What makes them unique. Psychometry, the ability to see the past of objects, or the tendency towards visions of the future, that's the Unifying which gives over the Physical when it manifests itself and the cycle starts again." She rolled the paper circle through a full loop.
Hunter's brain hurt.
"So it's an energy flow that constantly cycles and thus holds everything together while doing so which is what holds the balance of the universe rolling?" Tech summarized.
"Yep." Sajaun beamed.
"I'm glad you got that 'cause I'm not sure I did," Hunter admitted.
"I think I did?" Wrecker said hesitantly.
"Don't worry if you don't get it." Sahaun said gently, "It takes Masters years to understand. That's just the short and dirty version."
"So what part of that had to do with Wrecker?" Cross asked sharply, breaking the gentle moment.
Hunter wanted to glare at his brother but Sajaun just smiled bittersweetly, "Wrecker is dreaming about the end of the Jedi that will come to fruition at the end of the war unless I stop it."
Hunter's blood ran cold at the near thought. If the Jedi were destroyed then the Republic would be too and then any hope of escape would be up in the air. Wrecker looked strangely ill at Sajaun's words though and it made Hunter's brain stop churning out backup plans.
"Why is he dreaming about it?" Crosshair demanded.
"Because all the clones are." Sajaun said simply, meeting Crosshair's cutting gaze unflinchingly, "You're not made to fight in this war. You're meant to end it."
Hunter's brain kicked into high gear at her words shifting what she'd said around to fit together.
The end of the Jedi.
The end of the war.
The end of the Republic.
'You're meant to end it.'
Oh KARK .
Hunter's head snapped around before had even fully made the connection to lock eyes with Sajaun who was calmly looking at him like she hadn't just discovered the biggest genocide plan this millennium.
"The clones aren't meant to serve the Jedi," Hunter whispered, realizing dawning.
"No," Sajaun agreed softly, eyes alight with some sort of burning drive he understood now, "You're meant to kill them."