Chapter Text
When the Doctor sees Clara Oswald and Captain Jack Harkness walking in Hyde Park together in 2014, he ducks behind a tree with a gasp. It doesn’t matter that neither of them know this new body of his. No one knows him yet. After a difficult regeneration, one where, for a moment, he could’ve sworn he was regressing into his tenth incarnation, he is resetting by spending some time in his favorite city. He goes, as always, to pay his respects at Canary Wharf first. When two old ladies ask if he’s lost someone, he says the word Rose for the first time in this body. After that difficult moment, a park sounds nice, so that is where he goes next.
He ignores the urge to check in with more former companions. Rose is different, he tells himself, because there is no chance of seeing her. Only a chance to close his eyes and touch the engraving of her name, an altar where gods pray in the middle of the business district of London. Rose, of course, is different for other reasons as well, but as removed as he is from his tenth incarnation, it does no good to dwell where nothing can be changed, prayers aside.
As he strolls along the gravel pathway, admiring the bloom of spring, he wonders about this new urge: to see Donna, Martha, maybe an earlier version of Clara. Perhaps Yaz. He has been the kind of person who desires a family. He has even been the kind of person who has one. However, he has never, ever, been the kind of person who is able to hold onto one. He has allowed families to form around him, but he has never sought them out for fear of the inevitable loss.
Maybe, finally, this incarnation is different.
Then, he’s interrupted by a familiar, booming laugh. As if his thoughts conjured them, there they are. Clara and Jack. Together. Carrying a picnic basket and a few bottles of wine. Laughing.
He’s behind the tree in an instant, gasping for air despite his respiratory bypass. It doesn’t kick in. Every part of his body is frozen in shock.
That’s possible, technically, right? If improbable?
Regardless, he needs to leave. With one last, longing look at the happiness of two people he has loved, he makes his way ahead of them, deeper into the park, when his eyes catch on two women sitting on a picnic blanket. One blonde. One redhead. And this time, this pairing, this timeline, is too impossible to leave alone. Not if he wants to avoid the reapers killing four people he loves. So he resolves to join them, squaring his shoulders, both his hearts beating fast.
The redhead is beautiful, as she has always been. She looks older, but the Doctor would know her anywhere. She looks up as he approaches, and he recognizes the look on her face as the one she’d put on to ward off unwanted advances. He continues forward despite the glare. “Amy?” He asks, stopping at the edge of the blanket. As if stepping on the checkered fabric would be a promise he’d be unable to break. “Amelia Pond?” His voice cracks. He doesn’t trust himself to look at the other woman.
Amy’s eyes narrow, then go wide. She grabs the arm of the blonde woman next to her, who he finally lays eyes on. She looks up, uncertain and wary, reaching her free hand into her jacket.
“Jenny,” he whispers. He wants to ask how, why, but here is his daughter, sitting with his best friend, happy and healthy and alive and somehow in the 21st century.
It’s almost as if the entire park around the three of them, busy on a sunny Saturday, has gone utterly silent. At least, he can’t seem to hear the bustle anymore. Jenny does not remove her hand from her jacket; instead, she grasps something. “Who are you?” She asks, which breaks his hearts a little, but Amy already knows.
She holds out a hand with neatly manicured nails, little hearts drawn onto her ring finger like how Clara used to do while he worked on the TARDIS, and the pieces are falling together in a picture that’s difficult to fathom. “Come on, Raggedy Man,” she greets, and then Jenny knows, dropping something out of her jacket - it almost looks like a sonic, he realizes - and reaching up blindly through teary eyes for his other hand. He takes them both with the grip of someone who never wants to let go. “Sit down. Everyone's on their way.”
He sits between them without question, and they fold their arms around him. There’s a deep warmth filling his hearts as this body is held for the first time, and he presses a gentle kiss to Jenny’s forehead as she begins to cry in earnest. As her tears wet his plaid jacket, he notices Amy’s familiar red hair spilling over his shoulder and can’t help but smile. He has a million questions, but he waits, his hearts already almost too full. Something is coming. Something that will change him forever.
-
Clara and Jack take him in their arms without hesitation when they arrive, along with Luke and a girl named Sky, holding a toddler that the Doctor knows instantly is Martha’s and Mickey’s. He sets the puzzle aside as Clara throws herself into his arms.
“You know me,” she whispers to him when he catches her with ease, and he laughs.
“What, you thought that would stick?” He teases, before growing serious. “I’d know you anywhere, Clara Oswald.”
“I’m sorry,” she says, as she squeezes him tighter, her forehead pressed into his shoulder, “for everything. The things I’ve done that hurt you.” She swallows hard. “I’ve gotten help, understanding it all, and I hope you have too. I still think we’re better off not traveling together, but you’ll always be my friend.”
The Doctor holds her close. “My Clara,” he whispers, and for a moment, to Clara, he sounds exactly like her first Doctor. When she opens her eyes, the illusion is ruined. Still, though she has to blink back tears, she lets him say her piece like he let her say hers. “I kept my promise to you,” he says. “I stayed the Doctor, even when I lost you. Even when I didn’t know who you were. And because of you, I always will.” He pauses. “I’m sorry too, and of course I’ll always be your friend.”
She pulls back, eying him. “You’re different,” she announces, clearing her throat to lighten the atmosphere. The Doctor grins back at her, teeth shining white. “Wonder if it’ll grow on me.” She squeezes his arm. “You got kinda fit,” she muses.
“Really fit,” Jack agrees, hugging him. “Hiya, Doc.”
“Jack,” he greets, grinning. “Always a pleasure.”
“Oooh, it’s been a while since you’ve been a flirt,” he winks.
“This body is new,” he admits.
“How new?” Amy wonders.
“A few hours,” he admits, ignoring the looks his companions exchange as he greets Luke and Sky, the child in Sky’s arms immediately reaching out to him, demanding to be held. He takes the child with ease, happy just to hold him. “I suppose I’m a baby kind of man,” he muses. “Hello there, sweetheart,” he says, and the child, who looks to be three or four, begins to tell him all about his day.
The parents themselves appear in the middle of this story with Rory Williams and a blue child who Amy introduces as hers. The Doctor quickly intuits the telepathic nature of the young girl, greeting her in her native language and sees her childlike mind, her open and full love for Rory and Amy and someone glowing in golden light. The Doctor breaks the connection to protect her privacy, gathering the rest of his old companions to him in a warm hug. Martha is last, studying him with wise and thoughtful eyes, much older and more mature than she had been when she left him, and he feels a burst of joy that she got out and found something better.
“Doctor,” she says, almost hesitant as she pulls away, “you should know - we’ve been able to save others-”
But the Doctor isn’t listening, for cresting the hill with River Song, Donna Noble, and an unfamiliar man flanking her, is a woman that he never thought he’d see again. A woman to whom he had just paid his respects mere hours ago.
If he hadn’t still been hanging on to Martha’s arm, he would’ve staggered back. “Rose,” he breathes, releasing Martha and stepping forward, before stopping short. He doesn’t dare to blink.
“Here we go again,” Mickey murmurs, but the Doctor has no response. He watches as the three women come closer. Donna catches sight of him and narrows her eyes, breaking off from the trio. The unfamiliar man goes with her. He can tell that she’s hurt, and he doesn’t blame her. He wants to make amends more than anything. Almost anything. His hearts are now thrumming violently as nearly all of his attention narrows on one person.
River comes up to him first. “Hello, sweetie,” she greets, pressing a kiss to his cheek and then knowingly peeling off to the side to stand with Clara.
His eyes burn from not blinking as Rose comes to a stop a few feet from him. She looks older, but no less beautiful. Her hair is longer, a darker, more natural blonde, her jawline is sharp, but her eyes are still that beautiful amber as she sticks her hands in her back pockets - the Doctor’s hands immediately begin to itch at the sight of her own - and meets his gaze head on.
“Hi,” she says, soft and gentle, as Martha sneaks up and carefully removes her son from his arms. For a moment, her face is unreadable, but then he sees the smile threatening the corners of her lips.
The returning smile that spreads across the Doctor’s face is slow, but blinding. He can’t help it; whatever the implications are of this woman, this companion who saw him through the aftermath of the worst moment of his lives, standing in front of him, he can deal with them later.
He takes her hand. Of course he takes her hand.
It’s a beginning and an end and somewhere in the middle. As he leads her away from the others, something falls apart. Something else snaps into place.
“Hello, Rose Tyler.”
-
Clara takes River’s hand. “Are you okay?” She whispers, watching the Doctor’s world narrow down to Rose. It hurts, even though she’s never really had romantic feelings for the Doctor. She’s just used to being the most important person in the world to him. But not this Doctor. This one has gotten over her, the same way she’s gotten over him.
“Getting there,” River replies. “You?”
To her own surprise, Clara can’t help but smile at the obvious love emanating from the Doctor as he pulls Rose away from the group. She’s truly never wanted happiness for another individual more than she does right in this moment. “I am,” she admits. “I’m happy,” she adds, sniffling a little before laughing. “But if they don’t work this out, I’ll do it for them.”
Mickey snorts from his place next to his wife, his son giggling helplessly at the sound, which makes the rest of the group smile. “You’ll have to get in line.”
-
Rose is uncharacteristically silent as she follows the Doctor about fifty feet away from the picnic. She glances back once, and at her sudden attention, the others swiftly look away, spreading out and unpacking.
Well, except Jack, who just grins at her. She sticks her tongue out at him.
“He’s still a pain in the arse, then?” The Doctor teases, and she nearly pulls something as her head whips back to him. This new, new, etc., Doctor’s sense of humor is new to her, but she already knows that she could fall into a rhythm with him easily. She even opens her mouth to do so, but then her eyes catch Donna’s retreating back and a stab of anger hits. She hasn’t forgotten the pain in her friend’s eyes when they restored her memory. Despite losing her entire family in the parallel universe, she believes it to be one of her most painful memories, one of the few times she’s nearly lost her faith in the Doctor. She takes her hand back from him even though it feels deeply wrong, but images keep flashing in her mind. Jack, alone on Satellite Five. Clara’s downturned mouth when she asked after her Doctor, already certain of the answer. River’s hand in hers, as they both adjusted to a new hand to hold. The desperation in Rory’s shout when he ran for her TARDIS. Sarah Jane’s quiet longing in her final days. Donna’s face, Donna’s brilliant mind, Donna’s importance.
Her eyes narrow.
“You need to talk to Donna,” is the first thing out of her mouth as she folds her arms across her chest. She feels the aching yearning in the meter of space between them, but these words are more important.
She waits for him to obfuscate, to distract, but he surprises her by smiling, wide and genuine. Rose is almost struck dumb with the force of it. “Rose Tyler, you are one of a kind,” he announces, and she suppresses the urge to giggle like a teenager. Instead, she lifts her chin.
What the hell are you changing into?
She’s unsure if he’s also remembering that gun and that Dalek, with all the decades and centuries between them. His grin fades as though he does, and he sighs. “She’s alright, then?” He asks, quiet and earnest. “Memory intact?”
“Yep,” she replies, uncrossing her arms and sticking her hands in her pockets for the second time in the last five minutes. It’s a conscious effort not to reach for him. She marvels at how easy it is to be instantly attracted to this new Doctor, but perhaps once you have been through one regeneration, the others get easier and easier. “Martha and I made sure before we attempted anything.” She pins him in place with her expression. “It wasn’t that hard.”
After studying her for a long moment, the Doctor arches his head and gestures for her to join him. They walk side by side, finding a path filled with tourists and locals alike, winding through the trees and grasses. Finally, the Doctor speaks. “Rose, I know I’ve hurt the others. I know that I have a thousand questions about how, when, why. We’ll get to all that, I promise. But I want to start with us.”
Rose keeps her eyes firmly ahead. “There is no us. I’m older than I look. He… he’s gone. For a long time, now.”
“I’m sorry for that, Rose, but that’s not what I meant,” he says, clearly relishing the way her name sounds on this new tongue. He could speak it a thousand more times, and it would never be enough. “You came back, then?”
Rose wants to know what he meant, but she doesn’t ask. “Yeah. Like I said, it’s been a long time… I wanted to see Mickey. And Jack.”
“Not me,” he says, raising both of his eyebrows. It’s not a question.
They come to a stop at a small pavilion, circling around to avoid tourist photos in a usual, time-traveler dance. She swallows hard, looking away, when her eyes catch on the statue at the center of the raised pavilion.
It’s Peter Pan. Of course. She breathes out a laugh, even as she feels the Doctor’s heavy gaze on her. She tilts her head, examining the boy. An immortal, standing high on his stump, playing on a pipe to draw listeners by the droves. Old and wise, young and playful. She wonders if he ever wanted to settle down.
“I could never get the hang of the pan pipes,” the Doctor murmurs, low and intimate, leaning ever so slightly into her. Their arms brush, and she feels something spark deep in her stomach.
She ignores his astute observation of her drawing parallels in favor of his earlier not-question. “I couldn’t,” she admits. “If you hadn’t changed - even when I knew you had -” She cuts herself off, unsure of her own words. How can she tell him that she had avoided him out of cowardice? Out of anger?
She meets his eyes dead on for the first time and nearly crumbles. She doesn’t have to tell him. He already knows. “Doctor,” she barely breathes, and he realizes that this is the first time she’s said his name.
Turning to her, he holds out his arms. She can see the caution written in every line of his body, but it’s the emotion laden in his voice that finally breaks her down. “Hello,” he says once more.
“Hello,” she sobs, falling forward and letting her head thunk against his sternum, shuddering when he envelops her in his arms. “Sarah Jane is gone,” she whispers in his coat.
The Doctor exhales. He had suspected as much, seeing Luke. “My Sarah Jane,” he murmurs.
She thinks about telling him that Sarah Jane waited for him, that she wanted to say goodbye. But the victory is that she can’t stomach hurting him. Instead, she holds him tighter. “I’m sorry, Doctor,” she replies. “She wasn’t alone,” she adds, hoping that eases something in him.
For a long moment, they stand there together. The surrounding crowds give them a wide berth, and she glares at one woman who looks at them distastefully. Martha and Mickey have told her about the prejudice they still experience for their skin color, and for the first time, she wonders if the Doctor has ever been dark-skinned before. Wonders if Gallifrey was similarly backwards. “But there’s you, isn’t there?” He murmurs, pulling her attention back to him. A stranger’s opinion matters less than nothing to her anyways.
“There’s me,” she agrees. Shockingly, there is no pause. No hesitation. It’s an automatic response, and it will always be the truth.
“And you’ve built this all on your own,” he whispers, pulling back so he can look down in her eyes. “A support group?” He teases, and she giggles, mostly out of relief.
“A family,” she corrects, slapping him lightly on the shoulder. “We have a TARDIS and everything.”
“Ah,” he hums, and she can tell he has a massive amount of questions he’s trying to hold back.
“I owe it all to Martha,” she explains. “She told me that I couldn’t be alone.” Wiping away her tears, she sniffles. “I should’ve tried to find you,” she continues. “I’m sorry, I was just so angry when I lost him-”
“No, love,” he interrupts, cupping her face in his hands. She closes her eyes at his touch, his familiar cold hands. “I think we were supposed to meet here, and now.”
“There’s me, Doctor,” she repeats. “But it’s not the same. It’s not just me. Do you understand?”
The Doctor sighs. “I suppose that means that I should go find Donna.”
“I think that’s for the best.” She says, sniffling, making to step away from him, but he holds her in place with strong arms.
“But Rose… I lied. It did need saying. It does. And this regeneration is new, but I know I’m the type of man who doesn’t run away from it.” He presses a gentle kiss to her forehead. “We’re going to work this out, and we’ll have plenty of time for everything we want to do. But just in case… I love you, Rose Marion Tyler. You’ve been written on my hearts for a very long time, through quite a few faces.” He dips down and nudges her nose with his. “Forever,” he vows quietly.
Rose almost can’t breathe. “Doctor…”
“I know,” he whispers.
She’s not exactly sure what he knows, but she’s very sure that whatever it is, she knows it too.
-
The conversation with Donna is one of the hardest ones he’s ever had. Neither one of them walks away content, but Donna says she doesn’t hate him, so he’ll have to take some baby steps. After, they walk in silence back to the picnic, where the Doctor is quickly caught up on their most recent travels.
They’re packing up when River meets his eyes and tilts her head. He nods, and they walk a few paces behind the group.
“Rose’s lifespan matches yours now,” she says, casual and easy, but the Doctor recognizes the intensity behind her eyes. River Song, he knows, will fight to the death for what she believes in, and it makes them a dangerous pair when aligned.
“Are you advocating for her?” A smile curves at the corner of his lips, and he offers her his arm.
River takes his arm, but she shakes her head. “I know what Rule Number One was with you and I, Doctor. But I think we should be honest with each other.” Raising his eyebrows, he gestures for her to continue. “I loved you, and I believe that a part of you loved me.”
The Doctor nearly stops in surprise. This level of blunt honesty is unusual from River, who used to put all of her stock in spoilers, but she merely pulls him along.
“We don’t need to unpack all that,” she continues, “but I want to give you a friendly piece of advice.”
“Sounds a little more like you’re about to threaten me,” he deadpans.
“Hm,” River acknowledges, before bringing them to an abrupt stop. She notices Mickey and Rose notice, pulling the rest of the group along. Jack and Donna hang back, just out of earshot, and River feels a burst of gratitude for her friends. “You always were too smart for your own good.” She stops then, turning to him. “I’ve known Rose for a while now. She saved my life. Saved my parents’ lives. Gave them the opportunity to have the child they’ve always wanted. Rose’s lifespan matches yours, but that doesn’t mean you can sweep everything else under the rug and go flouncing off across the universe without a care.”
“There was a time you wanted that for you and me,” the Doctor points out.
“Well Rose is better than me,” she retorts, her eyes sliding from his in what the Doctor can only name as shame. “And she deserves your best self. If this isn’t the incarnation that will give her the best, you best leave now.”
The Doctor sighs, before stooping to meet her eyes. “Rose is… well. Rose,” he admits. “But River, you’ve just threatened me to protect your friend’s heart after all that we’ve been through together. As far as I’m concerned, that makes you an exceptional person.”
River just hums a vague sound of assent, looking away to hide her tears. He lets her, lets her turn and go ahead, while Jack and Donna come back for him.
“That was surprisingly good of you, Doc,” Jack murmurs, patting his shoulder. Donna says nothing, does nothing, but he can see her eyes soften a little. It’s a start.
-
They retire to the TARDIS, and the Doctor gallantly asks Rose to sit just outside on the bench with him. The invitation is clearly meant to calm everyone else, knowing that their friend is just outside. Judging from the tense air in the TARDIS, however, he is unsuccessful. After shooting the group a pleading look, Rose agrees.
Without much conversation, the rest of them agree to settle in the Library after the children are in bed, except Luke, who has successfully argued that he is old enough to be part of these discussions. Rory lights the fire in the fireplace and then enters into quiet conversation with Amy, Luke, and Mickey. Donna, Lee, and Martha are speaking deeper in the stacks about something completely unrelated to what they’ve just been through, as if such a distraction can dull their nerves.
Jack tosses his arms around River and Clara, who are sitting on the couch with Jenny. How interesting, he thinks, that the quasi-immortals and immortals have congregated together. “How are we, ladies?” He asks, though with the deep well of life experience they all share, he thinks he knows exactly how they are.
Clara looks at him, unimpressed by his useless question. His only excuse is that he’s feeling a little useless himself. “Afraid,” she admits, softening a little at the lost look on his face. She doesn’t have to elaborate. Rose is their family. She’s an essential part of the glue that holds them together. If she decides to give her relationship with the Doctor another go, what will happen to the rest of them? This is her TARDIS after all.
“Do you think she’ll go with him?” Jenny blurts out, more direct than Jack, surely, but they all flinch at the way she gives a voice to their fears.
“No. Not yet,” Jack replies, a little numb, before he shakes his head and turns a smile on the Doctor’s daughter. “You don’t have to worry, though. You’re his kid. I know he wants to get to know you better.” He lets out a shaky sigh. “You won’t be left in the dust; that’s for sure.”
Jenny lets out a noise of protest, narrowing her eyes. “Neither will you, Jack!” She swears, holding out her hand over Clara’s stomach. Clara leans back, looking up at Jack.
Jack takes the hint and her hand, grasping it tightly. “That’s sweet, Jen, but I’m afraid I’ve had some experiences that suggest otherwise.”
“We’re going to be around for a long time,” River points out, gesturing to the four of them on the couch. “Even if she stays until…” she trails off, looking wistfully at her parents. “Well, she’ll leave us eventually.”
Leaning her head on Clara’s shoulder, Jenny refuses to lose faith in her father or in the woman she already sees as a sort of step-mother. “Rose will work it out. We’re her family.”
“I promised her lifetimes,” Jack says, almost to himself as he gathers the women more tightly in his arms. River lays her hand on top of Jack and Jenny’s, and no one mentions the way it is ever-so-slightly shaking. “Maybe I should’ve asked her to promise the same.”
-
Rose watches the door of the TARDIS with trepidation as the Doctor watches her. “I shouldn’t be out too long,” she warns the Doctor, who nods.
He leans back on the bench, hoping to instill a little relaxation in her. From the way her hands are balled in her lap, it doesn’t work. “I wouldn’t keep you if it weren’t important,” he promises, fighting the urge to reach for her. She hasn’t given him explicit or implicit permission yet. “Rose, I need to know what happened to you.”
Rose huffs a laugh, twisting her fingers together. “Bad Wolf,” she explains, before giving him a brief overview of the past few decades. “At first I thought it was just the long life stuff,” she adds, “at least, that’s what it was in the parallel universe. But it’s been different since I’ve been back.” She elaborates further on how Bad Wolf saved River and Clara, how she caused a slave revolt on Astradia’s home planet. “Martha’s been trying to figure it out, but she hasn’t gotten very far,” she admits. “She’s worried it’s hurting me.”
The Doctor reaches out to take her hand, stopping halfway to let her make the decision. When she sees how worried he looks, she hooks her fingers with his, unable to fight her quiet, brief smile when he squeezes reassuringly. “How do you feel after the goddess takes over?” He asks, eyes on her even as he rubs the crease between her thumb and forefinger with his thumb.
Looking away, Rose shrugs. “I pass out, and I’m tired after, but Martha couldn’t find anything more.”
The Doctor studies her carefully, but eventually, he nods. “I’d like to check you out in the medbay, mine or yours, within the next few days. But I think there’s less to learn in the physiological sense than you might think.” Previous versions of himself might have rushed her into the medbay that very instant, but this new incarnation is more circumspect. He’s certain if there is an immediate threat, Martha would have caught it. Instead, he thinks the cerebral approach might provide more answers, or at least, better questions.
Rose lets out an uncertain noise at his uncharacteristic perspective, which spurs the Doctor to continue: “The Bad Wolf is a manifestation of Time, my TARDIS, and you,” he offers. “She has your desires, the TARDIS’ abilities, and Time’s power. When that power took you, what did it do?”
Rose’s eyes catch on her TARDIS. Though it certainly happened, it’s difficult to imagine breaking open the heart of the TARDIS the way she had when she was younger. The TARDIS is so powerful and ancient and intelligent, and she’s just an ordinary human. “It defeated the Daleks,” she replies, still admiring her ship.
The Doctor shakes his head, drawing her attention back to him. “It did what it had to do to save Jack and me,” he corrects. “At the time, that meant defeating the Daleks and bringing Jack back to life however it could. But Rose, the Bad Wolf is you, and you’re much more clever than that.”
Rose’s eyes widen even as she blushes at the compliment. She knows she’s brilliant, even though she started out as ordinary, but hearing it from the Doctor is always nice. “You think, in that little span of time, I set this all up?” She asks, a little dubious.
The Doctor shrugs. “All of Time at your disposal with the combined intellect of the TARDIS and Rose Tyler?” He grins, bringing her hand up to his mouth and kissing it. “You probably did things that we’ll never know or even think of, all across the space-time continuum. Saving Clara and River means that Jack has more family and I have less to atone for.”
After bringing their joined hands down and into her lap, she reaches with her free hand to gently touch his face. He leans into the touch, his eyes briefly fluttering closed before reopening. “It’s for you too, Doctor,” she reminds him. “They’re your family too.”
He just grins at her, but she can see the pain in his eyes. “I’ve not earned them yet. Not after all the work you’ve put in to heal them from what I’ve done to them.”
“I know that’s not true.”
“How are you so sure?” He says lightly. “I’ve changed. You’ve seen me do it before.”
“Ooh, Doctor, that’s not fair,” she accuses him. “I didn’t understand back then, but now I do. You haven’t changed. Not really…” She blushes then. “That’s why I believe you when you say… you say you still…”
“I still,” he swears, not letting her have a moment of doubt despite seeing her scheme from a mile away. He would happily fall for it every time. “Oh, that was a dirty play, Rose Tyler, you brilliant human.”
She winks. “I do my best.”
“And you?” He says. “I look… different. I’m older than I was, even if I don’t look it. Hell, last incarnation, I was a woman,” he reveals, wiggling his eyebrows to hide his trepidation.
“I still,” she repeats back to him, as solemn as a vow, cutting right through his nonsense. Then, her expression breaks into a grin. “A woman, hey? I bet you were a babe. Do you have pictures?”
After laughing with her for a moment, he can’t help it. The words boil over with an ease he’s never felt before. “I love you, Rose Tyler,” he confesses again, leaning forward to press their foreheads together, bringing up a hand to mirror hers on his cheek.
“Maybe you did do a little bit of changing - twice in one day!” Rose teases, but tears are streaming down her face. She presses a soft kiss to his thumb, unable to leave him hanging for long. “I love you too.”
He breathes out, closing his eyes, though they shoot open when she closes the distance between their lips and kisses him, soft and gentle. She pulls back immediately when he jerks backward, but he pulls her back in without hesitation and kisses her so hard and desperate that his jaw hurts from the effort. Rose opens her mouth to ease the pressure, and he groans as he unwinds their hands to pull her closer to him, kissing her deeper.
“Oi, get a room, you two!”
They break apart with a laugh to look at the annoyed passerby. When their eyes meet, they break into more laughter, hanging onto each other as they gasp for air.
“R-respiratory bypass?” She questions between giggles.
“Shut it off for the fun of it,” he replies, sending her into another fit of giggles. “You humans live like this?” He gasps, trying to get air in his superior lungs. She’s wheezing beside him, and neither of them can remember the last time they felt so happy.
When they finally get control of themselves, Rose rests her head on his shoulder as he pulls her in, fitting their hips and shoulders together like a puzzle long overdue. Rose hooks her leg over her knee, playfully kicking her foot against his. “This is easier than I thought it would be,” she admits. “Jenny tried to convince me otherwise, but I was too scared to listen to her.”
“How is Jenny?” He murmurs, his heart jumping at the thought of his long-lost daughter so close.
“She’s brilliant, Doctor. She’s yours, after all,” she teases. “She’s missed you. A trip would mean a lot.”
The Doctor tugs on her shoulder until she’s half on top of him, enjoying the fact that he finally looks as strong as he is. A good male specimen to ward off other interested male specimens. It’s been a while since he’s been the kind of individual to get jealous, and he wonders if he’ll regain that trait in this body. Right now, he feels pretty secure in Rose Tyler’s affections - she did marry him, after all - so he imagines he won’t be as bad as his ninth and tenth incarnations. Time will tell. “A trip with both of my girls?” He teases. “Pinch me. I must be dreaming.”
Rose stiffens against him. “Doctor…”
Sighing, he allows her to regain a little distance so they can look at each other as they talk. “Alright. Easy part over, then?”
“‘Fraid so,” she admits, inhaling audibly as she turns pleading eyes on him. “I want to see where this leads, more than anything, but I can’t come with you full time. That’s my line. I have responsibilities.” She holds her breath, as if bracing herself for the worst news.
As if he would let Rose Tyler get away so easily, the Doctor thinks, though he admits her doubt hurts as much as it is warranted. “I understand,” he says, calm and warm, and she exhales. With a smile, she snuggles closer to him. “You put so much work into this family,” he says softly. “I wouldn’t dare take you from it.”
She reaches up and grasps his chin to tilt his head, pressing a grateful kiss to his lips. “For now, we can tether the TARDISes together if we want to have adventures together,” she throws out as an idea. “You can pick up a companion or two, and we can have date night.” She presses kisses to his face until he swoops down to do the same to her. “I can’t make you any promises right now without checking in with everyone, but it’ll work, Doctor. I know it will.”
He admires her familiar optimism, feeling an answering fuzzy feeling bubble up in his hearts. Still, he pulls back to look at her seriously. “I’ll do whatever you want, Rose, but understand: one day, I want the Doctor and Rose Tyler, in the TARDIS, as it should be.” His eyes burn into hers, and she’s reminded of the man that hunched over her in that white room that still haunts her, yelling that she’d never see her mother again. She loves this version of him as much as it used to scare her: the Time Lord hidden within the easygoing facade. “We can take the others too, sometimes or full time, but I want you with me.”
She nods. “Okay,” she whispers, gazing up at him with wide eyes. “Speaking of the others, I should go talk to them,” she adds, reluctant, as his gaze focuses once more on her lips.
“Mind if I take a look under the hood of your TARDIS while you do?” He asks. He doesn’t want to be parted from her. Not yet.
Rose smiles, knowing exactly what he’s thinking. “Of course. But no hammers. My TARDIS likes a gentle touch.”
The Doctor circles an arm around her as she unlocks the door. “Hm. Like someone else I know?” He says, low and rough, enjoying the way Rose shudders in his arms.
“Down, you! There are kids aboard!”
The Doctor retreats, hands up, watching her walk down the hall with a longing look.
Soon.
-
They all spend a few days in London while matters get settled. The Doctor makes time for all of his old companions, at least the ones that want to speak with him. Some of them avoid him in one-on-one settings, most notably, Martha and Jack. Clara also keeps her distance, but he senses no ill will from her. Jenny tells him that she is the newest to their group except Jenny herself, meaning that what happened between them is younger and rawer. The Doctor understands.
He runs his tests on Rose, and with a second thought, on Jenny and Davie, due to his likely conception in the TARDIS. Jenny is a perfectly healthy Gallifreyan, and David is a perfectly healthy human.
Rose is perfectly healthy as well, but she is something else. Human 2.0, the Doctor calls it, with Martha watching on worriedly.
The Doctor’s relationships stand on many different levels. The bright gold of hope for the future with Jenny. The blank, white slate of new family for Luke, Sky, David, and Astradia. Something much, much more complicated for the remainder of them.
In the media room, Donna allows herself to fall apart in Lee’s arms. Her husband holds her tightly as she wonders where all the righteous anger coursing through her body has gone.
Mickey and Rose, heads together, whisper furiously in the bowels of the TARDIS. There is nothing that needs to be repaired. No one interrupts them, given their long history.
Clara and Jack disappear for long walks. When they come back, Clara’s face is pale and Jack’s is pinched.
Amy, Rory, and River tell stories until an empathetic Astradia is sleeping soundly in her bed. They speak with the Doctor during the day, unwinding and forgiving and reminiscing. Slowly, the bedtime stories shift to more personal ones, until one night, Amy settles the covers over her second daughter with a sigh. “I want to tell you a new story tonight,” she says. “It’s an important one.”
“Okay, mum,” Astradia whispers, looking at Rory and River, who look anxious and excited, respectively.
“Once upon a time,” Amy begins, her voice low for fear of it breaking, “there was a girl who lived in a house with an unusual crack in the wall.”
-
Martha takes her time, but five days in, she finds him sitting in the console room of Rose’s TARDIS after Rose has gone to sort out a dispute between Luke and Sky.
They don’t talk. He thinks that she can sense he’s talked out, and she just sits with him next to the console. The TARDIS whirls and hums, but the room is otherwise silent. It’s peaceful and gentle, and after he stops waiting for her to bring up all the ways he’s hurt her and the others, he begins to relax.
“I like this armchair,” he says finally, squeezing the red armrests.
Martha smiles. She has more lines in her face, at the crinkle of her eye and the pull of her lips, like the rest of them, but there is a serene quality about her that is missing from the rest of them. She is a mortal among immortals, an ex-soldier, an human academic among alien minds. After all this time, to him, she remains a star. “Me too,” she agrees, admiring the remnant of the life she left behind for this hard, fantastic one.
The Doctor lets out a ragged sigh, leaning his head back against the head cushion. He doesn’t look at her. “Thank you, Martha Jones,” he says, low and a little bit broken. She merely nods once, and they continue on in their comforting silence.
When she leaves, he finally realizes what Rose meant when she said that Martha had saved her life.
-
When Jack finds him, it’s not so easy. In fact, when he realizes that Jack has come to confront him in his own TARDIS, he realizes that it will be downright nasty.
Jack lets himself into his TARDIS, the key glinting in his hand either one that the Doctor had already given Rose and Jenny, or the one he had left in the other TARDIS as a gesture of goodwill for any of them that wished to visit him. Regardless, it’s meant to rile him up, and he refuses to rise to the bait. “This you seems pretty happy-go-lucky,” Jack says, a mock-lightness to his tone as he circles the Doctor like a predator. “Does Rose know you have them all fooled?”
“Jack…” The Doctor sighs.
Jack barks out a laugh at his agreeable tone. “You can’t fool me, Doc. You and me, we understand what a long life does to you. You’re all accommodating now, but you’re impatient. Hungry. I can see it. She will too.”
The Doctor’s eyes narrow as Jack continues to pace. “Rose wants to be with me. The others seem happy enough to get to know me again or to at least consider forgiveness. Why aren’t you?”
Jack stops short, spinning on his heel to point an accusing finger into the Doctor’s chest. “Rose is too kind to tell you the pain you’ve left in your wake. You’re the same man who left me on the Game Station. The same man who made Mickey feel lesser. The same man who did nothing to save Donna’s memories.” He swallows. “The same man who wouldn’t grant a dying woman’s final wish.”
“Don’t you dare talk to me about Sarah,” the Doctor growls, and Jack’s lips twitch up in triumph.
“See?” He exclaims. “There’s the man. What happens when Rose’s ties to us keep her grounded when all you want to do is fly? We’re not like Jackie, you know. You can’t just pop by for a visit every few weeks to keep us sated.”
The Doctor knows that he’s being baited, but Jack is right when he says that they know each other well. For example, he knows that Jack, usually content to forgive and forget, is lashing out from fear. Just as well as Jack knows exactly what buttons to push to wake up the Doctor’s never-truly-dormant fury.
“You’ve lived a long time, Harkness,” the Doctor admits, stepping up into Jack’s face. “Longer than most. Not as long as me. Not for a long shot.” His eyes deepen to black. “You want to see darkness? Fine. I’m the most powerful known quantity in the universe. A complex space-time event.” He feels his voice rise to a shout. Makes no effort to stop it. “I’m the killer of my kind. I’ve committed atrocities - so many that I’ve forgotten some of them! I should be incapable of the kind of love that you humans feel so easily because it’s far too dangerous. Do you know what I would do in Rose Tyler’s name?” He leans in. “Kill the devil. Consider destroying a universe. Split myself in two so part of me can experience something I never wanted before I met her.” His eyes narrow as his voice lowers from a shout to a monotone whisper. “And those are just things I’ve already done. Now, I’m older. More tired. More willing to do anything it takes to snatch happiness from the jaws of Time.”
“If you hurt her again…”
The Doctor laughs at him. “Don’t you see? Nothing will hurt her if I can help it. That includes her heart. If I’d destroy a universe, do you think I mind seeing your face around? River’s? Clara’s? I’d invite you in with open arms if I could just spend one last day with my beloved, and now I have the opportunity for thousands of them.” Jack can hear the greed in his voice, but he can also hear the yearning.
Pushing down on the well of sympathy rising in him, Jack presses harder. “So what you’re saying is that you’re smarter than your own instincts.”
“I know you’re afraid,” the Doctor retorts. “But do you really think I’d confide in you when all you want is to take her away from me?”
Jack’s eyes widen. “Doc, that’s not-”
Suddenly the TARDIS doors open. Rose is leaning against the entryway, watching them with curious eyes. “Is everything okay?”
The anger in the two men before her goes dormant, but Rose is smart enough to see it in the furrow of Jack’s eyebrows and the set of the Doctor’s jaw. Before the Doctor can say a word, however, Jack steps in. “Yep, we’re set,” he says.
“Hunky-dory - wait. Nope, I don’t like that,” the Doctor agrees, grimacing at his own word choice. “I’m headed out to grab chips with Jenny.” He pauses in front of Rose, taking her hands in his. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Rose Tyler,” he promises, dropping a gentle kiss on her lips.
Rose threads her fingers behind his neck, returning the kiss. “Ta, Doctor,” she says lowly. After a long moment, he steps back and leaves quickly, no looks back. Like if he did look back, he’d never leave. Rose understands.
“Is it hot in here?” Jack jokes. Rose just glares at him. “What?”
“What part of ‘lifetimes’ don’t you understand, Jack?”
Jack stops short, but his heart is pounding. “Rose…” He begins, voice regretful.
Rose isn’t having it; she steps up to him, cupping his face in her hands and pulling him down to her level. “Do you think I’d break that promise to you?” She accuses.
Jack sighs, taking hold of her wrists, keeping her hands on his cheeks. “One day, Rosie,” he says quietly, not meeting her eyes, “you’ll go with him.” He looks up. “You can lie to yourself or the others. But not him. Not me.”
Lowering her voice to a whisper, the hum of the TARDIS she’s forever bonded with harmonizing with her mind in the background, she fits their foreheads together. “Then that’s the day you better resign yourself to be a third wheel forever,” she says, forceful and certain. “Because I will never leave you behind again. Not you, not River, not Jenny. I know Clara doesn’t want to travel with him again, at least right now, but she won’t be alone either. I’ll make sure of it.” She breathes in. Out. “How long are you going to stay with me, Jack Harkness? How long are the others going to stay with me?”
“Lifetimes,” he swears.
She shakes her head, a pained smile on her face. “I understand now. What you’ve tried to say to me. It’s not just lifetimes. Somehow, in some way, you’ll all stay with me forever.” Jack exhales through his teeth, nodding. “The Doctor may have brought us together,” she adds, “but he doesn’t have the power to tear us apart.” She glares up at him. “Say it.”
“Okay, Rosie,” Jack replies, holding up his hands in surrender. “He can’t tear us apart.” He doesn’t sound like he truly believes it, but he sounds like he’ll fight for it. She’ll take that, for now.
“Now,” she says, brightening her tone, “let’s go tell the others what the plan is. I don’t want them to worry longer than they have to.”
So she takes his hand, and they leave the TARDIS together to meet their family, who will receive them in joy, as they will for countless years to come.
-
Many months later
The Doctor straightens his jacket, smiling critically in the mirror as he evaluates the necklace he bought yesterday on Turing II after accidentally-on-purpose causing a coup. Ruby sits behind him, smirking.
“Shut it,” he throws at her, and she breaks into laughter.
“Nah, because I’ve never seen a man more down bad for his girl. It’s humbling, it really is.” She pats him on the shoulder condescendingly, and he brushes her off.
“Wife,” he corrects. “She’s my wife.”
“In a parallel universe,” she teases.
The Doctor grumbles. “I should’ve never given you any of their numbers.”
Regardless of his words, he’s grateful for Ruby. Not many companions are so flexible to stop an invasion one day and attend a boy’s youth footie match the next day. She fits in seamlessly with the crew of Rose’s TARDIS, and according to Rose, she’s been bringing Luke out of his shell with ease. It’s a relief because it takes some pressure off of him and makes it guiltless to drop her off with his band of ex-companions when he needs a little alone time with, yes, his wife .
The last thought comes out a bit irritable, and the Doctor makes a mental note to start considering making this particular universe aware of the bond he wishes to build between himself and the woman he loves.
Grinning, Ruby picks up her jacket from the jumpseat, threading her arms through the sleeves. “So where are you taking her this time? Uprising? Revolution? Off to snog Madame Du Pompadour?”
“I’m gonna kill Mickey Smith,” he deadpans, but there’s no heat behind it. Mostly annoyance. Centuries later, and Mickey still gets on his nerves.
“No you’re not, because then you’d have to deal with Martha Smith.”
“No I’m not,” he agrees, shuddering. For all that Rose is the matriarch of her TARDIS, she defers to Martha in a way that she doesn’t even defer to Jack or him. He imagined she’d get on with Donna, with the Ponds. But Martha? He figured that he soured that connection back when she traveled with him, and he’s grateful, and a little befuddled, to be proven wrong. “And it’s Jones. And I’m taking her for a nice dinner out, thank you very much.”
Ruby snorts. “Yeah, we’ll see. You know, most couples would move in together after a relationship that spans whole centuries.”
The Doctor just smiles, and his bonding plans may or may not intensify. “In case it escaped your notice, we’re not really a traditional couple,” he says as he hears a knock on the door.
“You’re tellin’ me!”
The Doctor doesn’t respond to that, instead opening up the TARDIS door. There stands his daughter and his best friend, but his eyes shoot straight to the love of his lives. In a simple skirt and pink blouse combination, white trainers on her feet, she’s the loveliest thing he’s ever seen.
“C’mon Ruby,” Jenny shouts, tilting her head to look behind him. It took a long time for Jenny’s eyes to stop following him around the room, but after multiple assurances that he would regenerate before leaving her again, she’s been doing a lot better. “We’re going to the casino!”
Ruby trounces out the door, winking at the Doctor before hooking arms with Amy and Jenny, leading them away while regaling a now captive audience with their latest adventure.
He steps forward and bends his knees, grasping Rose’s waist and easily lifting her into the air in a spin. She squeals, clasping her hands to his shoulders, and he grins up at her. He’s been doing a lot of research, you see. Watching Ruby’s entire collection of early 2000s rom-coms. “You look beautiful,” he says, admiring the way her white skirt fans out in the air.
“For a human?” She teases as he sets her gently on the ground.
“For any species, thing, idea, entity, all of it,” he responds, whistling lowly when she does a playful turn for him.
“This you is smooth,” Rose teases.
The Doctor winks. “Pretty sure this me was made to woo you,” he says, “maybe the next me will finally have it easy.”
She steps forward and presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth, enjoying the strength of his arms as he holds her in return. “Where to?” He murmurs, nipping down for another kiss. He rocks her in his arms, swaying back and forth. Maybe dinner isn’t necessary. Maybe just a nice night in his TARDIS?
“Forwards or backwards?” she replies, dashing his briefly constructed new plans. It’s fine; running with her is his favorite activity in the universe.
“Oh, always forwards, Rose Tyler,” he says, waggling his eyebrows as he steps around the TARDIS, throwing levers and pressing buttons. Rose could always join him, but he suspects that she likes to watch. “That’s the kind of man I am,” he adds, moving back to her as they dematerialize and settle in a brand new world.
She grins up at him, wide and open, eyes shining. He returns the expression easily.
“Hello,” she murmurs.
“I love you,” he murmurs back.
“I’ll never get tired of that.”
Then, she follows him out of the TARDIS, hand in hand, Rose and the Doctor. As it should be.