Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

At precisely seven o'clock on Saturday morning, Tommy and Buck’s doorbell rang. Groaning, Buck turned to his other side and wrapped his arm tightly around his husband's waist, grumbling curse words over the sound of Tommy’s quiet chuckling. “It’s too early.” He groaned, leaning until his head was pressed between the older man’s shoulder blades.

Tommy patted his hand and replied, “Babe-” He didn’t even get another word out before there was another knock and then the persistent ringing of the doorbell. It kept going until Buck groaned and shot out of bed, wearing nothing but his grey sweats.

“I’m coming, quit it with the damn doorbell!” He shouted, ruffling his mass of curls as he shuffled from their bedroom and down the stairs. Throwing open the front door, he was greeted by a small child tackling his legs, nearly sending him sprawling. Thankfully his quick reflexes allowed him to grab onto the door frame before he went down. Blinking, sleep still in his eyes, he stared blearily down at the face of his adorable niece, Jee-yun, who he swore grew six inches every time he saw her. She was almost to his waist already. He swore it was only yesterday that she was clinging to his knees half the time while running rampant around his loft the other half.

On the other side of the threshold, his brother-in-law stared at him with a shit eating grin on his face while his sister stood there looking exasperated. “Sorry bud, did I wake ya?” Chimney asked, playing the fool like a champ.

“Sorry for the early wake up call.” Maddie said, sounding only mildly apologetic. “She was just so excited that we figured she could spend more of the day with her favorite uncle.”

“I’m her only uncle.” Buck yawned, though he couldn’t help the smile spreading across his face as he hefted his niece into his arms. She wrapped her tiny arms around his neck and planted a wet kiss on his cheek, giggling.

“Hey, I resent that.” Tommy’s voice came from behind him, but a moment later his warm arm was wrapped around his waist as lips brushed his cheek in a soft kiss. “Morning Chim. Maddie.” He greeted him with more warmth in his voice than Buck could currently muster. He leaned over and pressed a kiss to Jee-yun’s hair which she repaid with a kiss to his nose. Tommy ruffled her black hair, tied into adorable twin buns, grinning.

“Morning Tommy. We really appreciate you guys taking her today.” Maddie leaned in to give her brother-in-law a hug, which Buck scowled at, having not gotten his own. She dared to wink at him as she leaned back. “It feels like we haven't had a day to ourselves in… God. I don’t even remember when.”

Chimney looked at his watch. “Well. I had fewer grey hairs then so… Never?”

This caused all four of them to laugh and just as they were settling down, a new vehicle pulled into the driveway. A moment later, Eddie hopped out of the driver’s seat with Christopher in hot pursuit. “Well, well, well, look who’s awake. I thought I was gonna have to break in.” Eddie confessed with a grin just as dastardly as Chimney’s, pushing past his other family to reach in for a hug, carefully avoiding his niece, before turning to Tommy for a half hug handshake. “Christopher was so excited he could hardly sleep.”

“Daaaad!” The almost adult cried out, cheeks turning pink. “That’s not true. It’s just the zoo.”

Buck set Jee down, she was beginning to squirm anyway and she wanted a hug from her other uncle, and said, “Oh, I see how it is. The almost adult thinks he’s too cool for the zoo. Maybe we shouldn’t bring him along. Whadda ya think, Tommy? Think we should just leave him here to house sit?”

Tommy nodded as though his husband were giving the most sage of advice. “I guess house sitting is way cooler than seeing a bunch of lions, and tigers, and bears oh my.”

Chris made it to the door, and rather than going around his uncles, he decided to break straight through their arms to get into the house. “Not you too, Buck! I never said that.” Quieter he admitted, “I want to see the animals, too.” And even quieter. “And I want to hang out with my cousins.” Every single adult smiled at that, remembering what it was like to be that age and thinking that being with family wasn’t cool but secretly loving it anyway.

Eddie watched him with a fond expression for a moment before turning back to the others. He reached into his pocket and drew out his wallet. Opening it, he pulled out two twenties and tried to hand them over. “For admission, and lunch.”

Both men looked at Eddie. Then each other. Then at Eddie again. Tommy quirked one brow while Buck raised both, looking incredulous, and ridiculous in his shirtless state. “Eddie. Edmundo. Diaz. In what world do you think that you’d be paying for your son on our outing?” He motioned back and forth between him and Tommy. Tommy crossed his arms, biceps bulging in his sleep shirt. “My nephew is our responsibility today.”

Chimney snorted. “I think you might have offended them, Edmundo. ”

“Shut up Chimney.” The tip of Eddie’s ears had gone a little red as he stuffed the money back in his wallet before stashing that away as well.  “Anyway, I’m gonna enjoy my responsibility free day while you guys babysit. Have fun.” He leaned around Buck and Tommy and yelled into the house, “Have fun Christopher, love you bud!” before turning without another word and scurrying back to his car.

“We’re taking off, too. Call us if you need anything. Jee-yun, we’ll see you later, okay? Be good for Uncle Buck and Uncle Tommy.” Maddie crouched and pulled her daughter into a tight hug, kissing her head repeatedly until the young girl squealed and pulled away. She was immediately pulled into her fathers tight embrace and attacked with even more kisses, which she took until she didn’t, escaping into the house after her cousin. “Love you!” Her parents called after her, chuckling. “See you boys later.” Maddie pulled her younger brother into a hug this time and attacked him with forehead kisses until he too pulled away.

“I’m not kissing ya.” Chimney said, looking between the Buckley siblings. “That’s Tommy’s job.”

Buck blushed crimson, embarrassed even after all these years. “Get outta here.” He shooed them away with a flick of his hand. Grinning, they turned and headed down the front walk, giving a backwards wave as they did. Once they’d pulled out of the driveway, Buck gave in to the yawn he’d been suppressing. “Coffee. I need coffee. And lots of it.”

“Whatever you need, babe.” Tommy kissed his temple, pulling him back inside with a huge grin. “Who wants pancakes?” He yelled, pulling his half asleep husband along with him as a chorus of me’s followed the question.

Two hours, two pots of coffee and an absurd number of pancakes later, the doorbell rang once again. This time Buck was ready, dressed in a pair of slim fitting jeans and a plain white long sleeve tee. He pulled open his front door to see the Wilson family standing there, Mara and Denny both wearing a small backpack. Hen and Karen grinned at him. “They’re yours now, no take backsies.” Hen warned, shoving her kids through the door. Karen snorted.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” Buck rolled his eyes even as he captured each kid in a hug, much to Denny’s chagrin and Mara’s delight. She’d really blossomed over the last three years. While she still struggled, she’d made a lot of strides forward and was slowly getting back to being a normal, pre-teen girl. “Jee, Christopher, your cousins are here. Time to get ready.” He yelled into the house. He got a noise of consent in reply.

“Are you sure you’ve got this?” Karen asked, stroking Mara’s head, which she leaned into.

“Two teenagers, a pre-teen, and a six year old. What could possibly go wrong?”

“With you, Evan “Buck” Buckley-Kinard? Just about anything-” Hen said.

“And everything.” Karen finished.

He snorted. “Thanks for the vote of confidence. I’ll have Tommy with me, it’ll be fine.”

The women gave each other a pointed glance before turning to their friend, and chosen family, and shrugged. “I’m not sure that that’ll do a whole lot of extra good but you’re emergency responders. They could be in worse hands.” Karen said, wrapping hand around her wife’s neck and giving it a gentle squeeze.

“That’s true. Anyway, if you need something, anything at all, call us. We’ll be available.”

“Quit acting like you’re sending these guys to the battlefield. We’ve got this. Go enjoy your day off.” Buck reached out and carefully took Mara out from her mom’s grasp and wrapped her in a one armed hug. “I’m sure there’s plenty of things you can do when you’re alone .” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively to which both women snorted and Denny called out gross! “Now get off my lawn.” He put on his best old man voice as he waved at Karen and Hen, behesting them to get out of his sight. They chuckled before yelling out a Love you guys, and see you later as they disappeared down the walk. Mara shyly waved them off even as she snuggled deeper into her uncle’s side.

Once they’d driven off, Buck turned to Mara and asked, “We’ve still got a few pancakes left, how do you feel about eating them?” Her face lit up and she nodded enthusiastically. “Great. Why don’t you go eat while we wrangle everyone else?” He shook her gently before sending her into the kitchen. Denny had already plated some delicious looking hotcakes and microwaved them to toasty perfection, setting them down on the table just as his sister slid into the chair. “Tommy, go get dressed.” Buck ordered, kissing the man even as he shoved him towards the stairs. “You’ve got fifteen minutes.”

“Sir yes sir.” The man replied with a sass no one could compare to, even offering a two fingered salute. Buck rolled his eyes, the tiniest smirk on his lips that he hid away so his husband didn’t think he condoned such behavior. (Which he totally did, but Tommy couldn’t know that.)

Twenty minutes later the six of them were piled into Tommy’s SUV and on their way to the Los Angeles Zoo. Denny and Christopher chattered nonstop about video games the entire way while Mara asked Jee about which animals she was most excited to see. Buck sat in the passenger seat, his hand holding Tommy’s thigh. When they arrived, he was relieved to see that it wasn't overly crowded. It was a Wednesday morning at 10 AM but in LA, that meant nothing. As Tommy maneuvered around the parking lot into a space, Buck turned in his seat and turned his serious voice on. “Rules for today. Stay together. No running off. Mara, Jee, if you guys need to go to the bathroom or anything, ask Tommy or me. I don’t want you going anywhere alone, understand?” Both girls nodded. “Christopher and Denny, I know you’re almost adults but you’re still our responsibility so if you have to go, tell us.” They both nodded. “Christopher.”

“Yes Buck?”

“Are you okay with your crutches, or do you want us to see if they have a wheelchair available?”

The boy contemplated for a moment, even glancing at his braces in the very back, before saying, “I think I’ve got it, but maybe we could take one with us just in case.”

“Sounds like a plan. Now. Let’s get in there and have fun.” Buck fisted the air and let out a whoop which his companions readily copied. He also took a moment to appreciate Christopher’s growth. When he was younger, he’d have fought about being offered a wheelchair because he hated feeling singled out, but as he’d gotten older, he’d realized that it was just another tool to make his life easier. He still tried to use his crutches as much as possible, but he recognized that on days like today, where they’d be a lot of walking on sometimes uneven ground, it was better to just accept that he’d tire out more easily, and that the day didn’t have to end early just because he was being stubborn.

They piled out. Buck took Jee’s hand in his left and Tommy’s in his right, herding the older three kids in front of him. “I want to see the big cats.” Denny said, a skip in his step.

“I want to see the snakes.” Christopher sniffed, grinning.

“Monkey’s!” Jee chirped, swinging their hands together wildly, pulling Buck’s shoulder. He grinned indulgently down at her.

Mara clasped her hands together, playing nervously with them. “Mara?” Tommy leaned forward so he was looking directly at her, his voice soft. “Is there something specific you’d like to see?”

She said something under her breath.

“Can you speak a little louder, sweetheart?”

“I want to see… the lemur’s. And the binturong.” The tiniest smile curved her lips.

“What the heck is a binturong?” Chris asked, scrunching his nose in confused contemplation.

“It’s a type of mammal, also known as a bearcat, even though it’s neither bear, nor cat.” Mara’s soft voice got ever so slightly louder with her excitement, her dark eyes alight as she spoke of them. “They’re really cute.”

Chris’s eyes lit up. “That sounds awesome. I want to see those, too. Can we Buck?”

Buck laughed. “Yeah, of course. We’re here to see all the animals today. Why don’t we start at the beginning and we’ll just make our way through each enclosure?” The kids cheered excitedly. Plan in place, they paid their dues and entered the wonderful world of mammals.

As soon as they saw the first animal, Jee slipped from Buck’s grasp so she could plaster her nose against the glass, imitating the animal behind it. Buck and Tommy grinned, taking out their phones so they could snap photos and send them off to their parents..

When they reached the binturong enclosure, the two older men took a seat on a bench nearby, knowing that the kids were going to be a while. Mara was animatedly explaining to the boys everything she knew about the little creatures as they looked on, her hands a wild blur of gestures and emotion, a look of awe in their expressions. Buck couldn’t help his grin as he rested his head against his husband’s shoulder after taking a short video to send to her moms. Tommy leaned back against him, putting their clasped hands together in his lap as he played with the other man’s fingers. “They’re having a great time. I’ve never seen Mara so chatty.” He mumbled fondly. Buck nodded in agreement. He felt Tommy inhale deeply, then, like he was readying himself for something. “So… I know you like kids.” He began. Buck shifted just a little so he could look up at him, though he really only saw the underside of his stubbled jaw, and waited patiently. Tommy’s blue eyes shifted directly into his. “Have you ever considered… having any of your own?”

Buck sat up, nearly colliding with his husband's face as his heart began to pound. They’d been married for six months, and together for nearly four years, but they’d never discussed kids. Of course Buck had always imagined himself as a dad, but it had never been a deal breaker if his theoretical wife hadn’t been interested, but here he was, in the healthiest relationship he’d ever been in, and his partner was asking if he wanted babies. His eyes welled with tears and Tommy nearly fell backwards in his surprise.

Reaching out, he cupped Buck’s face, searching his expression even while his hands trembled, blue eyes wide with horrified concern. “Evan. Babe. I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you. If you don’t want kids, that’s totally fine-” Buck slapped Tommy’s hands away and lunged forward, capturing his lips in a starving kiss, wrapping a hand around his neck so that he could pull the man even further into himself. He grabbed onto the short hairs at the nape of his neck and tugged until Tommy whimpered, begging for air. The noise he made was borderline indecent.

But Buck would’ve kept kissing the man if Christopher hadn’t whistled and then said, “Ew, get a room you guys! No one needs to see two old guys making out.” That broke the spell and both men pulled apart, snorting with laughter, Buck’s sounding a little wet, but Buck didn’t stop touching the man.

“Evan-” Tommy tried again, reaching out to wipe away the stray tears still streaking down Buck’s face, his cheeks red.

“If that’s your way of asking me to make babies with you then the answer is yes. Always yes.” Buck kissed him once again, more chastely this time, before leaning in to press their foreheads together, sniffing as his nose dripped. “I’ll have as many kids with you as you want.”

Tommy wrapped him up in his arms and pressed a kiss into his curls, though Buck could clearly tell he was grinning as he did it. “I’m not entirely sure that’s how biology works, though I’m not opposed to trying. However, I was thinking more along the lines of adoption, or you know, surrogacy.” 

Buck shivered, feeling heat in his belly. In retaliation, he leaned into Tommy’s ear and breathed, “I’m not so opposed to trying over… and over… and over again, either.” He nipped the soft cartilage and tugged. When he let go, the tip of that ear was bright red and he grinned deviously. “But, surrogacy works too.” Finally he leaned back so he could see his husband's face. The look he wore sent jitters down his spine and for a split second he really wished they weren’t in public.

“I’m telling dad you two were being inappropriate in front of my cousins.” The voice made them jump and they turned to find Christopher standing there with both eyebrows raised looking wholly unimpressed.

“Like your dad hasn’t done worse with you around. That man could look subtle in the eye and still miss the mark.” Buck pinched his side after wiping at his face with his forearm, making him giggle and then glare, trying hard not to look guilty. Tommy, for some reason, appeared smug.

“I’m pretty sure I’ve never seen him trying to eat his girlfriend's face before.”

“Good thing Tommy is my husband, then, and not a girlfriend.” Buck stuck his tongue out as if that would help him win his argument. Christopher didn’t have time to reply as the others gathered around them, ready to move on. “Was it everything you hoped for, Mara?” Buck asked, changing the subject. She nodded, her face lit up like the north star with her joy. “Good. Where to next?”

Over the next four hours they saw hundreds of animals, taking extra time near the tiger and lion enclosure, and spending an obscene amount of time with the primates as Jee asked them to read each and every description they came across; ate exorbitantly priced frozen treats and a massive, greasy pizza.

They hung out in the gift shop for nearly an hour, each kid getting to choose one thing to take home. Jee chose a stuffed elephant. Mara, of course, found a huge stuffed binturong, and even though it was much more expensive than what the others chose, Tommy couldn’t say no. Denny found a shark tooth necklace that claimed it was from a real shark (though Buck doubted it seeing as it only put him out eighteen dollars and some change.) Christopher picked out a shirt with a tiger in the middle of a roar that wrapped from around the back to the front so just the tiger's head was showing. Buck and Tommy each picked out an LA Zoo keychain that they added to their keys.

By the time they made it back to the car, Tommy was pushing Christopher in the wheelchair with Jee curled up in his lap. Denny held onto his sister's hand as he pulled her along, her eyes drooping. He didn’t seem to be doing much better, stumbling over small rocks and nearly twisting an ankle in a small crack in the pavement. Buck stashed Mara’s stuffed animal in the trunk before ushering her into the middle with the boys bracketing her like bookends. Tommy helped Christopher in, setting his crutches in back. As he went to return the borrowed chair, Buck made sure everyone was buckled before climbing into the front seat and getting Jee settled. She leaned heavily against him, her tiny chest rising and falling as she slept. He wrapped an arm around her, pillowing her head into his side. A few moments later Tommy climbed in and they were headed back home.

On the drive back, Buck sent out a text suggesting a sleepover to which the others readily agreed, loving their free time. It was Tommy’s turn to hold his leg, the smallest grin on his face the entire time. Clearly the kids conversation has put him into a great mood and Buck couldn’t disagree.

When they arrived home, they ushered the kids into different bathrooms to clean up; having them shower before changing into pajamas that they each had stashed there. Impromptu sleepovers with Uncle’s Buck and Tommy were not so unusual that they just started keeping a set at the house. While Tommy observed the brushing of the teeth, Buck got the living room set up for a campout, blowing up three twin sized air mattresses and putting sheets over each of them and the couch. Each one got a fluffy down comforter and a pillow designated for each kid.

Once everyone had settled down, both men having showered and changed into their own sleep clothes, they popped some popcorn and flipped on the TV for a movie. By the time the movie ended, all four kids were fast asleep, snoring softly. Smiling, Buck switched the TV off and, as he walked by each of them, he leaned in to press a kiss to their heads and pull their blankets up just a little bit higher. Tommy followed behind with another gentle kiss to their temples.

As silently as they could, they marched upstairs to their bedroom where they too promptly crawled into bed and under the covers. Tommy immediately made himself the big spoon, pulling Buck into his arms as he snuffled the back of his neck, sighing contentedly. “Today was a good day.” He murmured, sounding sleepy.

“Yeah. It really was.” Buck hummed, shifting a little. He felt something pressed into his back. “Tommy.”

“Yes Evan?” Tommy hugged him closer.

Buck grinned as he attempted to turn over in his husband’s viper-like embrace. When he managed it, he stared deep into those bright blue eyes as he whispered, “I’m thinking that, maybe, just maybe, we can start trying for that baby tonight.”

“Oh yeah?” His earlier sleepiness seemed to slip away as his hand, which had been drawing circles on Evan’s back, dipped lower until he was cupping Evan’s ass pulling him against him.

Buck nodded, pressing his lips to Tommy’s nose, and then his lips and then down his jaw, his own hand wrapping around a firm half globe. “Yeah. I think so.” Giggling like school boys, Buck flipped Tommy onto his back and got on top of him, kissing him until they could no longer breathe.

It might not have been a traditional date, but Buck couldn’t have asked for a better way to spend his Saturday, with the man he loved and the kids of the family he chose.

Chapter Text

“We’re only going to look, Evan. We’re too busy to have animals.” Tommy reminded his boyfriend for the fifth time in the last hour. Today was the first day off they’d had together in what felt like months and Evan had asked if they could go see the animals at the surrounding shelters. Tommy knew how much the man loved animals - cats, dogs, rabbits, hamsters, you name it, he loved them - so he was hard pressed to tell him no. It’s not that Tommy didn’t also love the cute, furry, four legged fiends, but his love was on an entirely different level. The two of them would run a farm if Tommy let Evan keep every stray animal he brought home with puppy dog eyes, begging to keep them until they could get them to a shelter.

It had only been five months and Tommy didn’t have enough fingers and toes to keep count any longer.

“No, look, I know.” Evan replied as he slipped on his shoes, looking stunning in a tight fitting black t-shirt and a pair of slim fit joggers. “But I figured I could offer to like, help walk the dogs or something while we’re there. The shelter is always short staffed and getting to hang out with some dogs seems like a pretty awesome thing to do on my day off.”

“You know, walking the dogs is how you end up falling in love with one, right?” Tommy teased, pulling Evan into a side hug to kiss his temple. Evan batted at him with a pout on his lips which caused Tommy to laugh and plant another sloppy kiss, this one to his cheek. “ No animals , Evan Buckley.” He reiterated once more, booping his boyfriend on the nose before dancing away from his flailing arms. He thought he heard him mutter, we’ll see about that, under his breath as he scowled through the doorway but Tommy chose to believe the man knew better.

An hour later they were at the LA County Human Society. Evan made an immediate beeline for the caged animals where an enormous brown rabbit munched on some hay, its beady eyes focused everywhere but at the people. Evan poked his finger between the bars and cooed at the animal, trying his darndest to get it to move closer so he could pet it. Tommy watched on fondly, hands in his pockets, but didn’t move any closer.

After a couple minutes of futilely trying to win the rabbit over, Evan moved to another stack of cages where a couple of chunky guinea pigs curled up under their little plastic castle, snoring away. In a different cage, one lay pressed against the bars as he squeaked softly, seemingly unbothered by the chaos of the shelter. Evan looked beyond gleeful as he stuck his fingers once more through the cage bars to stroke the unruly black fur of the rodent. Even after the creature tried to take a chunk out of him he turned to Tommy with the widest smile and beamed, “Isn’t he just the cutest?”

Tommy humphed. “For a rodent.” Hey, he didn’t hate the creatures but he didn’t quite understand the concept of keeping them around as pets. Evan cocked an eyebrow at him but said nothing. Instead he turned back around, peering into each cage and attempting to pet any living thing within reach.

Once he’d finished his perusal of small animals, he washed his hands in the provided sink and they made their way into the cat colonies. There were about twenty cages, stacked two high, lined along one wall. On the other side were five small rooms, no more than 4x6 feet big with cat trees and litter boxes pressed against the glass walls. At the very end were three brightly colored doors with medium sized windows to look through. They were, Tommy assumed, the visiting rooms. 

A litany of meows surrounded them as the small creatures pushed themselves against their enclosures, trying their hardest to garner the humans’ attention. Some of the cages hosted two or three kitten sized cats, a chowder of them if you will, while most of them seemed to host one full grown animal. Tommy joined his boyfriend in the cooing this time, approaching each cage with a grin on his face as he poked his fingers through so he could stroke their soft fur.

One cage held a terrified white and black spotted cat named Mary who laid in her litter box, her pupils dilated so big you couldn’t tell what color her eyes were. Another held an orange cat named Georgie who rubbed himself aggressively against the bars, screaming the song of his people. One of the cages with kittens had a trio named after different types of French buns. Another with a litter named after Little Debbie sweet treats.

The two men stopped at each one, spending just a little bit of time with every animal, Tommy’s heart breaking just a bit as he thought about how some of these guys would stay trapped in their cages until they breathed their last. The oldest he’d seen was Mary at fourteen. While she looked healthy, Tommy knew it could be difficult to find adopters for elderly animals. Everyone wanted babies they could raise and mold into their own. He hoped that someone would get that beautiful girl out of her shell and into a good home.

They wandered over to the other wall to peer into the glass enclosures, staring as the cats napped and played. It was in the last room that Evan stopped to stare. Tommy followed his line of sight and mentally let out a breath, knowing that he may have just lost the battle. A small grey and white tabby cat batted at a catnip ball hanging from one of shelves on the floor to ceiling cat trees. It had an elastic band and the cutie would grab onto it with his claws before promptly falling to side to bunny kick the hell out of it, biting into it like he was biting into his prey. He was perfect. With the exception of one thing.

This beautiful baby had one eye.

Tommy looked at the paperwork hanging in the window, searching until he found info for the cat Evan’s eyes hadn’t left. Finding it, he let out a snort that finally got the other man’s attention. “What?” He asked, his eyes drawn back to the cat.

“His name.” Tommy laughed, knowing that telling Evan was basically setting their fate in stone.

“What about it?” He asked, his hand on the door to the enclosure.

“Evan.” Tommy grabbed the man's hand and pulled him to stand next to him, forcing him to look. As soon as he saw it he guffawed, his blue eyes sparkling with pure mirth. “Evan, his name is Jack Sparrow.” The one year old had been found, malnourished, in the streets and had been surrendered to the shelter by his heroes. He’d been neutered, and vaccinated, and was ready to be taken home that day. “A little on the nose, don’t you think?”

“I think he’s perfect.”

“If you go in there Evan, we’re going to be leaving this shelter with a cat. What did I say before I agreed to come here with you?” His tone was exasperated, but he felt fondness tugging at his heart, loving the way his boyfriends eyes softened as he stared in at the perfectly imperfect animal. Tommy knew, deep in his bones, that the animal could’ve been a hideous, deranged, mess, and Evan would’ve had the compassion to see him and want to take him in and Tommy loved him all the more for it. One mission eye wasn’t a deterrent in the least.

“I just want to say hi.” The man insisted, tugging Tommy towards the door. Sighing, he let himself be dragged in where the cat took immediately to both of them, scenting their legs as he rubbed himself all over them, trying his little best to crawl up their pant legs. Thank God they were both wearing slightly thicker material because this cat had claws like a lion and they were sharper than knives.

Evan leaned down and scooped Jack into his arms, resting the baby’s front paws on his shoulder while supporting his hind paws on his forearm. Jack began to purr, his motor loud enough to be heard across the room, and rubbed himself all over Evan’s stubble. Evan ran his hand down the cat's back, speaking in soft tones as he cuddled him, laughing as he was aggressively pet back

 Tommy’s heart melted and he couldn’t stop the wild image of snuggling on the couch with Jack nestled between them, one paw on Tommy’s leg with his tail curled over Buck’s. Shaking out the image, Tommy said, “Alright Evan, time to go.” His boyfriend’s face fell, and as he expected, was reluctant to put his new friend down. It took another handful of strokes, and softly whispered I love you ’s before he could bear to let go. Tommy wrapped an arm around his shoulders and pulled him in close. “We don’t have time.” He whispered, nuzzling his cheek with his nose. “I’d love to bring him home, but we just can’t right now.”

“I know.” Evan huffed, dejected. “Let’s go see the dogs now. I wanna ask if we can help walk them.” Tommy nodded and pulled his boyfriend along, his chest tight as he watched Evan look back towards the cat area repeatedly, his eyes full of yearning.

The younger man's mood bounced back as soon as they entered the dog pens. If the cats had been loud, the dogs were deafening as they barked and growled at the visitors. But neither of them cared. Buck’s head swiveled, looking for an employee, and as soon as he found one he made a beeline for her, his own tail wagging as he approached. Tommy didn’t pay him any mind, instead glancing briefly into each kennel. A lot of the dogs were laying down on their beds, staring with big, pleading eyes into the outside as if all their energy had been drained from them. A few of them stood at their gates, tails wagging as they greeted each new stranger with abandon.

There mostly seemed to be big dogs, the smallest being a Jack Russel mixed with something else kind of small. And a lot of these ladies and fellas were older, with the youngest being three years old. There must’ve been a recent surge of surrenders and he briefly wondered why. His heart broke for these guys. Or he thought it had. Until he came upon a kennel with a dog that lay in its bed, facing away from the outside world. Tommy could just make out a pair of long, floppy ears, its coat a greying red-brown and white. The dog's sides barely moved as it breathed.

I wonder if it’s sick… Tommy thought, frowning. If it was, hopefully the shelter realized and took care of the problem. He stepped back from the gates so he could read the clipboard with information.

Name: Rudy

Age: 10

Gender: Male

Breed: Basset Hound Mix

Spayed/Neutered: Yes

Declawed: No

Reason for surrender:

Tommy’s heart really did nearly stutter to a stop.

Reason for surrender: My elderly dad unfortunately passed away. The shelter called all of my aunts and uncles, to see if someone would take me in, but nobody wanted me. So I came here. I might be old, but I still love to play and have so much love left to give. I also love to sit at my human’s feet as we watch the wind blow by together. I’d do better in an environment without small children.

Adoption fee: $175

Forget Me Not!

A huge orange sticker was stuck to the bottom of the page with those three words in bold type. Tommy looked over the page and found that Rudy had already been here for three months, and was constantly overlooked due to his age. Wanting to cry, Tommy slowly got into a crouch and clicked his tongue. “Rudy. Hey buddy, hey. Won’t you come say hi?” The animal didn’t move, but Tommy wasn’t about to give up. He softly called his name until those huge, floppy ears perked up and the old man slowly turned to look at him. Tommy whimpered as those giant eyes met his, Rudy’s eyes big and brown with his muzzle turned mostly grey. “C’mere buddy.” Tommy reached into the pail attached to the door to grab a treat, saddened when he realized that Rudy’s pail was mostly full compared to all the other dogs. He held it through the bars and clicked his tongue once more.

Rudy sniffed the air, looking back and forth between it and Tommy before, after a long, long while, getting slowly to his feet. Clearly his old bones ached but he jumped from the bed and lumbered over, giving the treat a smell before licking it. Deciding it was a good enough offering, he very gently took it between his teeth and pulled it from Tommy’s fingers. Tommy grinned like a loon, reaching out to pet the dog on its knobby little head, wanting to kick his feet with glee as the old boy allowed it. When Rudy finished his treat, Tommy held his hand in front of his nose to let him get a smell, and to his joy, received his first doggy kiss, timid as it was.

Internally he was groaning because, if Evan had been gone on Jack Sparrow, Tommy knew that his heart had just been stolen by an elderly dog named Rudy. And he knew, in his heart of hearts, that they’d be going home with not one animal today, but two. And for once it’d be all his fault.

Evan appeared then, out of thin air, appearing disappointed. “What’s up, baby?” Tommy asked, standing to meet his boyfriend’s eyes, reaching out to stroke his shoulders.

Evan peered around him as he muttered, “They said that they have volunteer dog walkers, but I have to go through a training program before I can take them out.”

“That’s too bad.” Tommy said, sincerely, knowing that Evan had been so excited about coming here to do just that. “Maybe you can sign up for one of the classes and next time we come you can take someone out.” He perked up at this.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, why not? I’m sure it would be fun.”

“Will you come with me?”

Tommy pressed a kiss to the tip of his nose. “Absolutely. Now, I think it’s about time we headed out. It’s getting late and we haven’t had lunch.”

“I didn’t get to say hi to all the dogs.” Evan pouted, looking longingly into each of the kennels he could see from where they were standing.

Tommy brushed his hair back and looked into his eyes. “I said hi to every single one, I promise. Will that do for today? I’m really, really hungry.”

Evan sighed, shoulders slumping. “Yeah, I guess.”

“Good. Now I have to go to the bathroom before we make the drive back, can you take the keys and go wait in the car?”

“Maybe I can stay here and pet the dogs while you’re in there…?” He sounded hopeful, but Tommy shook his head, a dastardly plan half formed in his head. “Why not?”

“If I don’t take long enough for you to pet all of them, you’ll be even more sad so take the loss this time, alright?” Tommy brushed his thumb over the pink birthmark over Evan’s eye, smiling indulgently at him, knowing he’d won the battle as soon as Evan breathed in deep and let it out in the most put upon sigh he’d ever heard.

“Yeah, I guess. Give me your damn keys.” Tommy patted him on the shoulder before digging his keys out of his front pocket and handing them over. “Don’t take too long. Now that you mentioned food, I’m starved.” It was his turn to lean in and press his lips to Tommy’s, giving them a little lick before pulling away. Tommy watched him go, making sure his boyfriend was far around the corner before approaching the front desk.

“I’d like to make an adoption please…”

Twenty minutes later, arms laden down with the bare basics, and one of the shelter workers assisting with Rudy and a bag of dog food, Tommy exited the shelter; his wallet was significantly lighter than when they’d gotten there, but he’s not sure he could be mad about it. “Can you stand back just a bit? This is kind of a surprise for my boyfriend.” Tommy asked the brunette following him. She grinned, and nodded, slowing her pace more than he did as he approached the car. Instead of the driver’s side, he approached the passenger side and pulled open the door.

“Tommy, what the heck took so long-” Evan didn’t even get the question out before Tommy set the shaking box down in his lap. Evan’s eyes went huge as he flicked his eyes between the box, then Tommy, then back to the box again, his hands held up as if in a hostage situation. He swallowed hard as his eyes landed once more on Tommy. “Y… You didn’t?”

Tommy leaned away for a moment to take Rudy’s leash, thanking the young woman helping him out. She nodded again, leaned the bag of food against the rear wheel, and disappeared back inside the building. A plaintive meow came from the box, Jack feeling a bit restless inside the confined space. This seemed to snap Evan out of it as he hurriedly pulled it open to rescue the little furball. His eyes welled with tears as he held Jack to his chest, looking at Tommy with so much love it was almost visible to the naked eye.

“Well, you know, I didn’t think it would be fair if I got to bring someone home and you didn’t.” Tommy elaborated, bringing Rudy into Evan’s line of sight. He gasped again, staring into the basset hounds sad, pitiful eyes. “Evan. Meet Rudy. Rudy, meet your other new dad.”

Still holding Jack tightly to his chest, Evan leaned out the door to let Rudy sniff him before stroking his big old head, grinning even as a tear streaked down his face. Once he’d had his fill, at least for the moment, he reached out and grabbed Tommy by the back of the neck to pull him in for what was most definitely an obscene kiss that could’ve possibly gotten them arrested. When they broke apart, Evan breathed against his lips, “I love you, Tommy Kinard. I love you so Goddamn much.” Then kissed him again.

Tommy rested their foreheads together for just a moment as he replied, “Love you too, Evan Buckley. Don’t you forget it.” Then Jack yowled, squirming so hard Evan nearly lost his hold on him to which he promptly shouted, shit! before pushing Tommy away and slamming the door shut. Laughing, Tommy led Rudy towards the back door and pulled it open, lifting the dog into the backseat where he quickly settled, resting his head on his paws as he stared at his new dad. The workers said that he might take a while to warm up, to get some of his energy back, but Tommy didn’t care one way or another. He loved this dog, to the moon and back, no matter what, and he was just so excited to watch his family grow.

Stashing their new supplies in the trunk, he hopped into the driver’s seat, excited for the evening, and days ahead.

Chapter Text

Buck checked his phone, yet again. 7:57 AM. Under the table his leg bounced, restlessly and he couldn’t help glancing around him, watching as strangers passed him by. Where was he? His fingers curled tighter around the warm coffee he’d been nursing for the last five minutes. This was why he hated being early. The anticipation was going to kill him. He glanced at his phone. 7:58 AM. It’s only been a minute? He thought in desperation. Groaning, he slumped in his seat, but just before he started spiraling into a pit of despair, he heard an oh so familiar voice calling out, “Evan?” He sat up straight and whipped his head back and forth until he spotted a familiar figure. Tommy.

Buck leaped to his feet, nearly sending the table flying, and held out his arms for an embrace. Tommy walked into them and pulled Buck tight to his body. Buck sagged with relief, relishing in the warmth of the arms around him, loving the feeling of Tommy rubbing his back with those giant hands. They represented safety, for Buck. Happiness. And he let himself bask in it until Tommy was the one to pull away. When they finally stepped back, Tommy cupped Buck’s cheek, stroking a thumb over his pink tinged skin, his blue eyes bouncing from Buck’s lips and back up. Clearly Tommy wanted a kiss, but he wasn’t sure if that was alright. Sure, Buck had kissed him like a starved man in a hospital waiting room but that didn’t mean all PDA was alright. Buck didn’t let him wonder for too long, leaning in to plant a chaste kiss on those pouty lips. Tommy smiled under the touch.

“Hi.” Buck mumbled, pulling away shyly.

“Hi.” Tommy replied, grinning.

“I got you coffee.” Buck gestured at the second cup sitting on the table. “I still don’t know how you take it, but hopefully this is better?” He sounded so unsure, even to himself. So uncool. How could Tommy wanna date someone as uncouth as he was?

Still smiling, Tommy stepped back and pulled out the cafe chair, sinking into it. He popped the brown plastic cap off and brought the cup to his nose, inhaling deeply, closing his eyes. A pleased expression washed over him and after a second, he took a long dreg. Buck sank into his own seat, watching helplessly. Eventually, Tommy’s eyes fluttered open. And he continued to appear pleased. “Alright?” Buck asked wearily, his fingers wrapped once more around his own dirty bean water, though his nerves were too high to partake in it.

Slowly his boyfriend nodded, setting the cup down and returning the lid, blue eyes open and staring back at him. “The vanilla is a nice touch.”

Buck breathed a huge sigh of relief. “I noticed you didn’t really seem to like sweet things, but you liked the cake at the wedding so… I took a chance.”

“Well, you did good, babe. It’s not my usual flavor profile, but I think I could get used to it.” Tommy reached across the table to take Buck’s hand in his, reversing their roles from just two months ago.

God. Had it really only been two months?

Buck curled his fingers around that larger, rougher hand, and smiled, the tips of his ears just ever so slightly pink. “So I still didn’t get it right?” He teased.

“No but, I’m not a hard man to please.” Tommy winked and squeezed Buck’s hand. Buck’s face went fire engine red. “Anyway. Today’s shift was a shit show-”

The next time Buck picked up his phone it was ten in the morning.

Chapter Text

To say Tommy is nervous would be an understatement. His palms are sweating worse than on the day he told the first ever boy he had a crush on him. That day had not gone in his favor. For the third time in as many minutes, he found himself wiping his palms on his jeans. Evan, holding a pan of homemade baked mac and cheese, glances at him wearing that soft sort of smile he always seems to get around Tommy.

Tommy thinks he manages to return the expression but honestly he’s not sure.

A moment later Evan confirms that he hasn’t as he stops in the driveway and turns to look at him. Tommy can tell he wants so badly to reach out but can’t, because both his hands are full with the weight of the still steaming side dish. “Hey, you doing okay? You kind of look like you saw a ghost.” His brows are drawn in with concern, his birthmark prominent in the early evening sun and for the briefest second, it draws Tommy’s attention away from the way his heart palpitates with nerves. But only for a moment.

“Yeah, no, I’m good.” He lies, even as he wipes his hands down his legs again. He can feel them growing more damp with every pass. If he doesn’t quit it soon, he’ll have to worry about chafing. “It’s just really warm out tonight.”

Evan cocks one of his beautifully groomed brows as he lifts his head to look at the sky. While the sun is bright, it’s clear to anyone paying attention that autumn is in full swing, the evening air beginning to chill even as they stand here. “Yeah, I’m not so sure about that.” Evan brings his gaze back down and seems to make a decision. He bends to put his concoction on the ground and steps into Tommy’s personal space, grabbing him by the biceps and staring straight into his eyes, searching. “Tell me what’s wrong, baby.”

“It’s just…” Tommy has to swallow the lump in his throat. It feels like the world is closing in around him and he can’t seem to breathe. Evan already came out to everyone here. Everyone already knows he’s gay. They’re fine with it. They’re all fine with it. He’s not the only member of the LGBTQ+ community attending. So why does it feel like his heart is constricting?

Tommy’s eyes flit to the door; he can hear the sound of the party already underway, raucous laughter filtering around the house from the back yard. Evan’s grip on his arms tightens reassuringly.

“Talk to me.” He reaches up and brings Tommy’s eyes back to him, a small frown on his lips. He hesitates a second but then leans in and presses his mouth to Tommy’s, not with any illicit intent, but more a show of solidarity and care.

Tommy takes a shuddering, deep breath and holds it until he’s forced to let out. Then, with a lot of reserve, he says, “I’m still… stuck somewhat in the past.” Just admitting that small amount relieves some of the pressure on his heart. “I can’t seem to completely reconcile the 118 of the past, and the 118 of today. They’re so completely different, in some ways that I can’t even quite understand. Hen, Chimney, Bobby… They all have their feet on both sides of the door - repressed Gerrard era Tommy, and post 118 era Tommy - and I’m not proud of who I was back then. I love seeing what this firehouse has become, but there’s a part of me that’s bitter, too. And I feel like I’m stepping into a place where I don’t belong. I don’t want to sully your family with my dirty past. A family barbeque in the Captain Gerrard era? It’s not even possible to dream of it, especially not with female firefighters, or non white firefighters, and especially not queer ones. You were only part of the family if you were a straight, white, all American man. And I’m just not sure how welcome I’ll be.” Tommy’s eyes feel damp but he blinks it back, refusing to show weakness. Today was a happy day, a day for celebration and fun, not tears and drama.

Evan reaches out and swipes a thumb under his eyes anyway, even though Tommy knows his face is dry, and says, the epitome of calm, “Tommy. Just like Abby, and Taylor, and Ali, and Natalia are parts of my past, they helped me become who I am today. Without each of them, who knows who I would’ve become. That’s what’s great about humanity is that humans learn from their pasts and try to make better choices for the future. And you made better choices. I don’t know what you were like when Hen and Chimney first joined the 118, but what I do know is that you risked your job to help them out over a decade later just because they called. Remember making fake mouth static at the fire chief even though you knew you were shit at it?” He smiles gently and presses another kiss to his boyfriend’s lips, and Tommy sighs into it, shuddering just a bit. “My point is that you’ve changed. Whatever transgressions you made in the past? They’ve been forgiven. Every single person at the station is so happy to have you around again. And you make me happy. Therefore, they’re happy.”

Tommy snorts and says thickly, “That’s presumptuous that their happiness rides on yours.”

Evan pulls him into a rib cracking hug and buries his nose into Tommy’s neck as he says, “I’m their precious Buck. Of course their entire lives revolve around my happiness.” There’s a long beat of silence before they’re laughing, Tommy returning the hug.

They stand there for a long time, with their arms around each other, before Evan pulls away and groans, “Now c’mon. My mac and cheese is getting cold and it’s all your fault.” He picks up the tray once again, giving Tommy a withering glare with no heat behind it, before turning on his heel and stomping up to Bobby and Athena’s door where he enters without knocking. The noise intensifies and, still damp eyed, Tommy is quick to follow.

______________________________________

The party is in full swing, music blaring from a tiny bluetooth speaker May scrounges up. Bobby stands at the grill with his apron on, flipping burgers between chastising his children and reminding them that if they do anything stupid, they’re still expected to show up to work next shift. This doesn’t deter Eddie, Buck, or Ravi, from doing shots as they try to figure out who can do the best gymnastics. They’re all plastered, so really they’re all losing, but Tommy still gives his wayward boyfriend his silent vote. He’s the only one who manages a one handed cartwheel, or at the very least doesn’t come crashing down on his face.

Tommy chuckles as he nurses his beer, the earlier fear driven from him the longer the party goes on. His attention shifts to where Christopher and Denny have their heads together as they battle each other in some game on their handhelds. Denny seems to have the upper hand because Chris lets out a swear and is quickly reprimanded by his inebriated father… Who goes right back to doing push ups since they seem to have switched to body weight exercises and who can do the most.

Hen, three glasses of Merlot in, tells Denny to put the videogame down and go do something productive. Karen, the only sober one of the bunch, pats her wife's knee and looks on fondly, telling her that it’s okay for him to play games sometimes. He’s always doing something productive at home. Hen sniffs but turns and plants a kiss to Karen’s lips before settling back against the lounge chair, not another word to be had. Mara is hitting a beach ball around with Jee, the tiniest smile on her lips the only thing indicating that she’s having a good time. Evan said to Tommy that, while she misses her brother Tyson a lot, she’s doing so much better in Hen and Karen’s care. Jee is cackling as she bats at it with as much force as her tiny fists can muster.

For a moment, Tommy thinks about how cute the babies Evan would create would be.

He shuts that thought down real quick, remembering that Evan does, in fact, have spawn running around somewhere in the world. Does he ever think of them? Probably. His kind hearted, sometimes reckless, boyfriend was too pure not to.

“A bunch of fools, aren’t they?” A sultry voice says next to him. Starting, he turns to find Athena gazing out at the bunch with an exasperated, yet fond, smirk she can’t quite hide. She’s trying to be stern, Tommy knows from past experience, but she can’t help loving these idiots like her own. “But maybe you’re looking at one in particular?” She teases him, giving him a sidelong glance as she takes a long sip of her own wine, slender arm thrown casually across her waist.

He chokes on the sip of beer he’s just taken. Logically, he knows that Evan is basically the 118’s baby. There’s no doubt in his mind that Athena and Bobby are his actual parents and Mr. and Mrs. Buckley only donated their genetic code. That being said, he’s never once considered how awkward it would be having to meet them in the capacity of ‘ boyfriend’ . How does Athena feel about it, knowing Evan’s past as a lady’s man? She wasn’t a major part of Tommy’s life when Gerrard was in charge, so he doesn’t know a whole lot about her. She was probably fine with it. Right? And as far as he knows, he’s never been formally introduced that way; it was always just sort of implied after the ‘ soot on the lips at the wedding’ debacle.

Coughing, he manages to get out, “I mean it’s hard not to stare when they’re acting the fool, isn’t it? Boys will be boys as the saying goes. Give them a little bit of alcohol and it just gets worse, ten fold.”

She snorts. “Now ain’t that the truth, but Tommy boy, you avoided the question.” He turns so he’s facing her and she responds in kind, looking at him eye to eye, one eyebrow cocked high. “He’s a very special boy, Tommy Kinard. He means a whole lot to a whole lot of people. And I’m thinking that he means a whole lot to you.”

He feels the blush in his cheeks and it takes all his willpower to not run for the hills. There’s still a part of him that fears. Fears people knowing that he likes men. Fears people knowing that he has unnatural desires. There’s still a part of him that wishes he remained repressed so that his life was easier. But with each passing day, his love and desire for Evan Buckley pushes those thoughts further into the depths. “He does, Athena. I’m not even sure I have the right words to describe how much he means to me.” He’s sure his cheeks are lit up like a Christmas tree with that admission.

She beams, her whole face lighting up before turning serious again. She reaches up and cups his cheek as she lowers her voice. “I have never seen that boy happier than when he’s with you so if you ever hurt him, Kinard - and I do mean physically, mentally, emotionally, or any other -lly you can come up with - I will hunt you down, and I will make you pay. Do you understand me? That boy is my son, my blood in his veins or not, and I don’t take kindly to folks that harm my children.” Tommy shudders as all the force of a mother bear hits him, but he manages a nod. “Then we’re all good here.” She’s smiling again as she lightly pats his cheek, overall expression softer than Tommy’s yet seen from her. “Now. Go ask that ridiculous boyfriend of yours to dance before he gets himself hurt. Again. We don’t need any more hospital visits.” Tommy breathes out a breath he doesn’t realize he’s holding in.

Athena squeezes his bicep reassuringly before sauntering away to wrap herself around her husband, planting a wet kiss to his cheek which Bobby repays in kind. May lets out a disgusted grunt but she’s grinning from ear to ear, clearly in love with her parents' love. It’s sweet, Tommy thinks. Those kids are so lucky to have a stepparent that never once treated them as anything less than his own flesh and blood.

Draining the last of his beer, he sets the bottle on one of the small outside tables before weaving his way to his boyfriend, who’s finally run out of steam, and is sitting cross legged on the ground, leaning back on his hands as he pants for air. “Having fun?” Tommy asks, sitting down next to him, laying a hand on the younger man's thigh; his body is so warm, emitting a pleasant heat that Tommy wishes he could just wrap himself up in. He begins to run his thumb in soothing circles in that spot and Evan immediately hums in pleased surprise. He leans into Tommy, resting his head on his shoulder.

“The mostest fun.” Evan replies, grinning with his eyes closed, words slurred ever so slightly. “What was Athena asking you?” He turns his face into Tommy’s shoulder and nuzzles him with his nose before planting a kiss there.

Tommy chuckles. “Oh you know, just threatening the boyfriend bodily harm if I so much as harm a single hair on your head.”

He shoots up straight and turns to glower at Athena’s back. “She did not.” He says as indignantly as he can with the state he’s in. “Imma go over there right now and tell her not to be  mean to you.” He begins stumbling to his feet. “Only I can be mean to you, okay? If anyone else is mean to you you gotta tell me and then I’ll beat them up.”

Tommy barks out a laugh as he reaches for Evan’s wrist, preventing him from standing the rest of the way. “Sweetheart, you wouldn’t harm a fly. I don’t think you’ll be beating anyone up. And plus, I’m bigger than you. I think I can handle it.”

Slowly Evan turns to him and he’s looking like a kicked puppy, blue eyes big and watery and he lets out a sniffle. “But i’s my job to protect you.” 

Tommy nods in agreement. “That’s right. But it’s also my job to protect you.” He pulls him a little closer and plants a kiss to his knuckles. “But let’s not do it by beating people up, okay?” Evan stares long and hard at him, then at Athena, who’s dragged Bobby into a slow dance on the patio, and then back at Tommy before giving the tiniest nod. “Good. Now, how about, instead of beating people up, we dance?”

He drops the kicked puppy look immediately and his face lights up like the north star. “Will you?” He pulls out of Tommy’s grasp just long enough to switch his grasp to the older man's hand, tugging on him until Tommy gets to his feet, allowing Buck to straighten out.

“Nothing would make me happier.” Tommy says genuinely, leaning in to press their foreheads together for just a second before kissing the tip of Buck’s nose, and then his birthmark. “Let’s go.” Taking the lead, he pulls his boyfriend onto the patio and wraps his arms around his waist. Evan takes the hint and wraps his arms around his neck, stepping as close as their bodies will allow, resting his head against Tommy’s shoulder, warm breath tickling his neck.

May seems to notice everyone coupling up because she smiles, a bit mischievously Tommy thought, and scrolls through her phone for a moment before the soft sounds of classic slow dance music drifts through the speaker. Tommy glances around to see Bobby holding Athena tight, one arm around her waist, the other gripping her hand as they sway together. Karen has pulled Hen out and the two of them are swaying with their foreheads pressed together, blissful smiles on their faces, eyes closed.

Ravi, seemingly emboldened by drink, approaches May and shyly asks her to dance. She looks taken aback only long enough for the young man to start slinking away before she’s grabbing his hand and pulling him in between them all, grinning so wide her face looks like it’s about to split.

Maddie and Chimney aren’t holding each other, but he’s got his arm wrapped lovingly around her waist, thumb rubbing circles over her hip under her shirt, as they watch the rest of their family at the edge of the patio-turned-dance-floor. Maddie’s eyes are on the two of them and, while she’s smiling, Tommy recognizes the wetness of her eyes. Always crying. He thinks fondly, smiling at her. She raises the hand not gripping her husband’s and gives him the tiniest approving wave. Jee-yun seems to have fallen asleep, curling up on one of the lounge chairs with Mara wrapped soundly around her. The boys disappeared inside some time ago with Harry.

Tommy turns his attention back to the man in his arms, letting go of all thoughts except him.

And for the next hour they dance, sometimes simply swaying in place, other times showing off all their moves, and sometimes having a dance contest because how could they not? As the sun fully sets, things begin to settle, everyone sobering up just enough to know they’ll get home safe. Everyone chips in to help clean up, Tommy helping Bobby with the dishes as Evan helps pick up debris in the yard. In another hour, they’re bidding everyone goodnight, hand in hand at the door. Athena hugs them both at the same time, squeezing the life out of the pilot; he knew she was strong, she was an officer after all, but he was still amazed at all the strength in that tiny package.

“Now Buck, you take care of Tommy, okay? No funny business on the way home.” She chides, stepping back and wagging a finger at him. “And Tommy, you best get this boy home safe or so help me…” She turns her waggling finger on him and he grins.

“Yes ma’am. I wouldn’t dream of doing anything otherwise.” He promises, giving her a two finger salute. She snorts and whaps him in the chest before shoving them out the door, calling one last goodnight. Evan replies in kind.

As they make their way to the Jeep, keys in Tommy’s hand since he’s the more sober of the two, Evan asks softly, “So, was that okay? Are you okay?” He squeezes Tommy’s larger hand.

Tommy pauses in his stride and thinks about it, though he really doesn’t have to think for long. The world hadn’t come crashing down. Everyone had treated him just like any other partner. Even Hen and Chimney seemed genuinely happy that he was there. For once in his life, for once in any partnership, he feels like he belongs. He doesn’t feel like an outsider where the windows are open but he’s not invited further inside. Turning, he cups his boyfriend's cheek and says, chest tight, “Yes, Evan. I’m good. I’m so good. Your family is so unbelievably amazing, and I’m so happy that you get to work with them, and I’m so happy that I get to be the one standing at your side.” Tears really do fall now, though it’s only a few. Evan wipes them away anyway as he leans in for a chaste kiss.

Smiling softly he reassures him, “Always Tommy. They’re your family now, too. Forever and always.”

Chapter Text

“Looking good.” Buck mumbles to himself as he checks out the spread in front of him. There’s a wicker basket open on the counter next to him, a soft checkered blanket ready to be added on top. His countertop is overflowing with easy to eat foods, things that don’t need to be heated up and are just as tasty at room temperature.

He picks up one container filled with tiny cucumber sandwiches, cut into triangles, and sets it neatly in the bottom. Next is homemade pasta salad. Some deviled eggs in the next. There’s also some freshly baked oatmeal cookies, a few with chocolate chips thrown in for fun, more than the two of them could possibly eat. The perfect desert for an otherwise savory meal. There’s also a small charcuterie board with a couple different cheeses, and a selection of deli meats and a small bowl of mixed nuts. He’s not sure how long they’ll be, but better too much food than too little. They were growing boys after all.

After the containers have been settled, he folds the blanket once more in half and sets it inside so it pushes against them, giving them something sturdy to lean on. As he adds things in, he checks off a mental list, mumbling to himself. “Silverware. Check. Napkins. Check. Drinks? Drinks.” He turns on his heel, panicking for a minute before spotting the bottle of red he’s bought specifically for tonight sitting at the other end of the island. He breathes a sigh of relief as he stows it in the basket, along with two plastic wine glasses. Lastly, he adds in two tiny bottles of water, since they’re driving. Buck glances at the clock. Just after eight. He needs to head out soon or he’ll be late picking Tommy up.

He runs up his loft stairs and strips off the black sweats and LAFD t-shirt he’s wearing and puts on a pair of tailored, straight leg navy slacks with that beautiful crease line fancy pants always seem to have. He digs through his closet, trying to pick out the perfect shirt, cursing as every option seems wrong. What color did he wear? Is a polo too much? What about silk, or fake silk at the very least? They’re going to the beach so maybe he shouldn’t wear anything too nice? He questions every option for much too long until he knows he’s running late. Groaning, he grabs the first shirt that catches his eye and decides that whatever it is will just have to do. It’s not like he’ll be in it the whole night anyway. Not if things go to plan.

Thankfully the shirt he pulls is a lovely dusty rose satin polo, perfect for a balmy night by the sea and not too ostentatious. He quickly pulls it on, leaving the top few buttons undone, showing off a swath of golden skin and rolls up the sleeves so that his forearms are on full display. Tommy is, noticeably, an arm guy. He grabs a pair of slip-ons that won’t be too unbearable in the sand and slips into them. From a hanger he grabs a light brown belt that he pulls through the loops after carefully tucking in his shirt, leaving it just a little loose and fluttery for a slightly less polished appearance. Going into the bathroom he grabs his black banded, black faced watch from the counter before immediately heading back out.

Looking in the full length mirror hanging on the closet door, he gives his hair a cursory finger comb, knowing full well that his curls are untameable, gives himself a smile and some finger guns with a tongue click, and rushes down the stairs, pulling out his phone to text his man.

Buck: I’m so sorry babe running late

He goes to slip it back into his pocket but it buzzes almost immediately.

Love: Hey, no worries. I’m just excited to see you tonight. Make sure you drive safe. *kiss emoji*

Buck: <3<3<3 i’ll see you soon, promise.

His phone buzzes again, but it’s already back in his pocket as he’s grabbing his basket of carefully curated goodies, opening the lid for one last cursory glance. (As if something in there will have grown legs and waltzed away in the time he was deliberating his outfit.) He does a spin in the kitchen anyway, ticking things off his list once more, wanting, needing , tonight to go perfectly. Deciding that he’s got everything in order, he grabs his keys and is out the door.

With LA traffic, it takes him about forty-five minutes to get to Tommy’s house. As soon as he pulls up, the front door swings open and Tommy is standing there, half in darkness, looking like the Greek god he is; he’s in a pair of loose fitting khaki linen pants with a soft looking black long sleeve button up. A pair of sand colored plain canvas boat shoes adorn his feet. He’s also got his sleeves rolled up and Buck suddenly finds it hard to swallow because his mouth has gone dry. He licks his lips as he approaches, trying to find words and failing.

“Hey.” Tommy says, voice husky, arms crossed over his broad chest. He’s also got a few buttons undone and Buck can see his sparse, slightly greying, chest hair peeking out. God how he wants to run his fingers through it; screw the picnic. He wants to grab this man and haul him back inside, right to the bedroom. But that would be such a waste.

Clearing his throat he manages a soft, “H-hey.” He doesn’t sound too thirsty. Right?

Tommy opens his arms and Buck steps right into them, meeting the slightly taller man in the middle for a chaste kiss, lips lingering near enough for them to share air. Tommy’s blue-grey’s stare into Buck’s, and they say nothing for the longest moment, simply enjoying being within each other’s circle after not seeing each other for over a week because of conflicting work schedules.

Tommy speaks again, eyes crinkling in the corner as he grins, smile crooked as always in that exceptionally endearing way. “Hey.” He says this once more, voice soft, as he pecks the younger man on the lips, then the tip of his nose, and finally his forehead, taking only a big enough step away so that they can more easily see each other.

“You already said that.” Buck chuckles, taking Tommy’s face between his hands, cupping his cheeks.

“Hmmm, did I? Must be getting forgetful in my old age.” Tommy grabs Buck’s hips, big hands like furnaces even through his shirt. “Well, did I tell you how absolutely amazing you look, then?” Buck preens, heart rate skyrocketing with the praise. “I’m starting to think I’m underdressed.” His eyes leave Buck’s to give his own, more than appropriate, outfit a once over.

“I think you look perfect.”

“Well that’s good, considering that you didn’t give me much to go on; only that we were going out late and to dress in something good for hanging around in.” Tommy laughs again, long and hardy, warming Buck’s body from the inside out. He strokes his boyfriend’s cheeks with his thumbs for just a moment, enjoying the feeling of that slightly ragged jaw from a few days worth of stubble. Tommy leans into it.

“Gotta keep you on your toes. Anyway, are you ready to go?”

“Sure, let me just grab my keys.” They share another quick kiss before Tommy lets go and heads a few steps back into the house so he can grab his keys and lock up.

Buck heads back to the Jeep to wait, looking once more into the back seat where the basket is tucked under an emergency blanket. In the very back he’s stashed a mountain of pillows, and a large quilt, as well as a deflated kiddy pool along with an air compressor. He saw the idea somewhere online, probably Pinterest, or TikTok or something, and it sounded heavenly. Seeing the haul in his rearview sends his heart fluttering. Tonight is going to be amazing, he’s determined to make it so.

He startles when the door pops open and Tommy slides in, grinning in that wicked little smirking way he does when he’s amused. “Something on your mind, Evan?” Oh God, the way this man says his name makes his knees weak and he doesn’t know if he’ll have enough control to work the pedals now.

“Not at all, what took you so long?” He deflects, mock pouting. His boyfriend just laughs at him as he reaches across the middle console to grab his hand, threading their fingers together before placing it on his knee. His large, callused, thumb rubs soothing circles over his skin and Buck relaxes in seconds. One man should not have this much control over his heart, he thinks as he shakes his head, grin on his face.

He pulls his hand away only long enough to put the car into reverse and back out before setting off towards their starlit destination. The ride to the beach outcropping is spent in comfortable, if not a bit of contemplative, silence, both men with things on their minds that didn’t need to be spoken out loud. Soft, classic rock spilled from the stereo, ala Bruce Springsteen and The Who - Tommy humming along, a bit off key but in a way that still brought warmth from the tips of Buck’s toes to the top of his head.

After about forty minutes, Buck turns left onto a small dirt path, barely large enough to constitute a road, and drives slowly down until he comes to a patch of smoothed dirt. With smooth efficiency, he makes a one handed turn to pull the car around like there’s marked parking spaces. Tommy stares out the window with a frown, confusion knitting his brows. Turning to Buck he says, “Well. This certainly isn’t what I was expecting. You didn’t bring me out here to like… Murder me and hide the body or something, did you?”

“If I did, would I tell you?” Buck smirks, and pulls Tommy forward into a kiss, teeth clacking. Tommy mumbles appreciatively. “Now come on, help me get set up.” He says as he hops from the car, slamming it shut behind. A moment later, the older man follows, approaching the back hatch trepidatiously. Buck presses the button that lets the gate swing automatically open, revealing the mounds of pillows and blankets he’s thrown back here. Tommy looks even more concerned as he glances between his outfit and Buck’s.

“As much fun as camping on the beach seems, I’m not sure we’re dressed right for the occasion.” Tommy grunts as Buck throws pillows at him until his arms are so full he can barely see over the top of the mound. “And all your stuff is going to get sand in it. Good luck cleaning it.”

“Shut up and trust the process.” Buck harrumphs, pulling the folded plastic pool out last. He finds the air compressor and sticks it into the other lighter socket in the back. Finding the opening nib, he turns the air on, wincing as the fan whirs to life, disturbing the silence of the somewhat rural night air. Tommy simply watches as each of the three rings on the pool inflate until Buck is clutching onto something that’s about five feet wide, by six feet long and is bright pink.

“That’s not gonna be big enough for two grown men to swim in.” Tommy taunts, knowing damn well that that’s not the intention, starting to catch on to what Buck is laying down for them. Buck glares at him as he shoves the hatch closed and goes for the back door where he uncovers the picnic basket and lifts it into his opposite arm. It’s difficult to carry the pool in his other hand but he’ll make it work. “Can I help you with that?” Clearly Tommy doesn’t mean it as he rests his head on his stack of linens balancing precariously in his grasp. He’s smirking again, that trepidation gone and vanished.

Buck says nothing, choosing to glare at his menace of a boyfriend instead as he kicks the door closed with his foot. They have a stare off for a solid minute before Buck gives up and turns on his heel, stomping away towards a wood plank path that leads down towards where the ocean crashes against the shores. The sound soothes his soul in a way he doesn’t quite have the words for. Tommy follows behind him like a ghost, the only clue he’s still there the slightest sound of the sand shifting as he shuffles along.

The two walk for about five minutes until a huge, looming, rock outcropping appears in front of them; Buck follows the curve of it until an opening appears. The rocks press towards the sky, curving in as they taper towards the top, shaped like a crescent moon with the middle eroded away to leave the most perfect cove. Buck whoops victoriously, thanking whatever Gods would listen that it wasn’t taken. The space wasn’t all that well known among most, but it was a popular date spot for those that were aware of the space's existence, especially during the summer. More than luck, it was probably empty as far as the eye could see because it was nine at night in October on a Tuesday. Perks of an inconsistent schedule. LA was warm but it wasn’t skinny dipping late at night in October warm.

He chances a glance at Tommy’s face and is beside himself with pleasure to see the slight look of awe, jaw hanging open as his gorgeous eyes scan the little piece of naturally carved out heaven. Tommy does a slow circle, taking it all in as Buck sets his basket aside and tilts the pool over to rid it of any, and all, sand it may have accumulated on the walk over. Once satisfied, he pulls open the basket and takes out the classic checkered blanket, a requirement for any good picnic date, and lays it out in the bottom. It fits almost perfectly, only creasing at the edges and in the corners. Then he begins to pile pillows in it, stuffing them along the edges and then piling it into a mini mountain. Soon there’s a cozy nest that mimics the shape of the cove. “Babe…” For some reason Tommy’s voice sounds thick but Buck can’t focus on that right now.

He finally takes the quilt that had been buried at the very bottom of the linen pile and ever so carefully folds into an accordion which he places at the opposite side of where the pillows are stacked. Finally he begins to pull out all of the dishes he’s made, setting them very gently in a neat circle on the checkered blanket, perfectly within reach for two men their size, but not overly intrusive. Buck’s grinning like a loon as he slaps his hands together, admiring his work as he cleans off imaginary dust. Nodding he finally takes in Tommy’s countenance, turning to face him with his hands on his hips, ready to jest with him, only for his expression to fall when he sees the shining in the man's eyes. “T-Tommy?” He takes the three steps he needs to get to him and grabs him by the biceps, tilting his head so he can look him in the eyes as his head is drooping now. Then he hears the slightest sniffle and his heart feels like it’s breaking in two. “Oh my God, Tommy. Babe, what’s wrong? I’m so sorry, it’s too much isn’t it. I should’ve told you beforehand-”

A strangled chuckle through another wet sniff as Tommy presses his thumb and pointer finger into the inner creases off his eyes, trying to stave off the onslaught. He takes a long second to compose himself, long enough that Buck thinks he’s not going to speak, but eventually he looks up, the smallest smile on his lips. He grabs Buck’s hips and apologizes, “Evan I- I’m sorry it’s just… This is… I mean this is absolutely amazing. You put in so much work for a date with me of all people. I’ve never had someone that would even consider doing something as thoughtful as this and I just felt so overwhelmed suddenly.” He leans in and captures Buck’s lips in the softest kiss, letting their lips linger for long seconds. When he pulls away, his eyes are still damp but he’s not in danger of shedding tears.

Buck blushes as he steps in a little closer, looking up at Tommy through his eyelashes as he says, “I did all this because it’s you, Tommy. You’re the best thing that’s happened to me in a long time and doing this?” He gestures behind him. “This is nothing compared to everything you’ve done for me. I…” He swallows the lump in his throat, not sure if he’s ready to say the words, but choosing to say them anyway. “I love you, Thomas Kinard. And I would do this kind of thing every single day if it meant getting to see you smile.”

The smile he gets in return could’ve caused blindness with its brilliance. A second later their lips are together again, this kiss much less chaste than the first as Tommy tastes every inch of Buck’s mouth, going so far as to half rut against him until Buck turns his face away, whining, “Aw, now that’s not fair. If you keep that up we’re not going to get to appreciating all my hard work.” Silence, then they’re both laughing as Tommy buries his nose in the crook of Buck’s neck; Buck allows him the moment to breathe him in, letting both their arousals settle. That wasn’t what now was for. Now was for finger sandwiches and cheap wine.

Stroking Tommy’s curls Buck kisses the side of his head and suggests, “Lets eat?” Tommy mumbles his displeasure but backs away. Taking Tommy’s hand, Buck guides him back to their makeshift bed, instructing him to remove his shoes and make sure to wipe as much sand off as possible. He barks out laughter when Tommy loses his balance and nearly eats dirt trying to get it all off, catching him before he stumbles more than a couple of steps. Tommy grabs a small fistful of sand and throws it back, cackling as Buck splutters.

Soon enough, though, they’re comfortably situated against the pillows, legs stretched out in front of them, crossed at the ankles.

For the next two hours the two chat about everything, and nothing, as they feed each other bites of food, channeling their inner kid as they smear food across the others lips - definitely getting more sauce than necessary up the other's nose. Deep, rumbling, full grown laughter echoes across the empty landscape, a backdrop to the sound of the sea.

The little finger sandwiches are a huge hit, disappearing within minutes. The bottle of wine goes just as quickly, each of them indulging after every bite. Their shoulders touch as they lean further and further into each other, the chemistry between them electric. Buck snaps a few pictures of the spread, and then a few selfies of them - one of them feeding each other, another of him kissing Tommy’s cheek, another with their cheeks pressed together, huge smiles on their faces, their cheeks red with wine.

They begin to slow their roll with the food, soon too stuffed to even contemplate another bite. A little tipsy, the two mutually decide to pack up what’s left though they struggle to put it back as neatly as it had gone in, before setting the basket outside the pool. As soon as that’s done, Buck pushes Tommy back into the pillows and orders, “Stay.” Then he crawls to the other side, surely giving his boyfriend a picture perfect view of his tush, and grabs the quilt, pulling it back towards the other side, unfolding it slowly. It’s definitely cool enough now, and once more Buck is thanking his lucky stars his plans are working in his favor.

Tommy’s feet are crossed again, so Buck nudges them apart and keeps doing it until Tommy’s legs are spread. He crawls between them and situates his back to the man’s front before pulling the quilt up around his shoulders. When Tommy doesn’t immediately wrap his arms around him, he keens, turning around to give him his best puppy dog impression. It takes way too long for the pilot to understand but eventually he gets the memo. He wraps his thick forearms around Buck’s middle and pulls him even closer, leaning back against the mountain behind him. Buck lets out a satisfied sigh, shimmying until he’s as comfortable as possible. Tommy chuckles and presses a kiss into his hair before tilting his head back, staring at the vast blackness peppered with stars above them.

They’re quiet for a long time. “They’re so beautiful.” Tommy sighs softly after a while, resting his chin on top of Buck’s head. “Sometimes I forget just how gorgeous the night sky can be; there’s so much light pollution in the city that it begins to feel normal that we can’t see them.” Buck hums in agreement as he nestles deeper into his boyfriend’s chest; he’s turned on his side and curled up. Once more they fall into silence when Tommy speaks again. “I love you too, you know. I didn’t miss you saying it earlier.” He’s speaking the words into the top of Buck’s head, tickling the sensitive follicles as his lips move. Buck wonders if it’s because he’s embarrassed, but he’s too content to think too hard on it.

Then his words sink in and he shoots into a sitting position, nearly taking Tommy’s chin out with him. He pulls back, laughing and grimacing all at once as he rubs at his jaw, baby blues sparkling with mirth as Buck gapes at him. “I - you - what?” He sputters, wine twisted mind trying to piece together those three little words into something that makes sense.

Tommy cups Buck’s face in his huge, warm hands and strokes his jaw with his thumbs as he repeats, “Evan Buckley, I love you .” He punctuates the statement with a kiss to his forehead, then to his birthmark, the tip of his nose and then finally his lips. “I think I realized it a while ago but seeing this,” he gestures around them, before returning his hand to Evan’s jaw, “I don’t think I could have any more doubts. You’re…” He swallows hard, a small frown making his brows crease and he looks so vulnerable. “I think you’re it for me, Evan. You’re my end game.”

It’s Buck’s turn to tear up but, unlike his stoic boyfriend, he doesn’t try to stop them. They slip down his cheeks unbidden - much less beautifully than Tommy’s favorite rom coms would lead you to believe they do - and he sniffles, lips trembling. “Tommy.” He whimpers before collapsing into his chest, burying his face in his collarbone. “Me too. I think you’re it for me too.” He hears the soft, choked, chuckle before feeling those familiar, strong arms wrap around  him, pulling Buck even further in, planting even more kisses into his hair, murmuring affirmations of love and adoration.

It doesn’t take long for the swell of emotions to catch up and not too soon after the confession to end all confessions, Buck finds himself slipping into rest, heavy eyes fluttering closed as Tommy tucks the blanket further around them, cocooning them from the rest of the world.

When he wakes, he’s being spooned from behind, his head resting against the plethora of pillows, Tommy’s breath is quiet and steady - puffs of hot air tickling the fine hairs at the base of his neck. One arm is slung casually around his middle, like a protective barrier and when he tries to turn it tightens around him and there’s soft, displeasured grumbling following the move. Smiling, Buck lets himself settle for just a moment more, sliding his hand along the man's arms until he tangles their fingers together. After a moment he tugs at the hand until Tommy snorts awake, snuffling in the cutest way, like a little piglet sneezing. “What time ‘z it?” He yawns and pulls his hand away to scrub at his face, rolling onto his back. Buck roots around for his phone and turns on the screen.

“Just after midnight.” He yawns himself, stretching before burrowing back under the quilt; the air has gotten quite chilly and the blanket is incredibly comfy cozy and Buck’s not sure he ever wants to get out. They lay in silence for just about a minute before Buck reluctantly suggests, “We should probably head back, huh?” Tommy sighs and nods. Groaning, Buck nuzzles into the blanket for a scant few seconds before ripping off the proverbial band aid, throwing the quilt back, exposing all his skin to the night air. He gives a full body shiver before stepping out of their makeshift nest. Tommy follows suit.

They spend the next ten minutes packing their stuff. Buck opens all of the air holes to let the pool deflate on their walk back and haphazardly stuffs the picnic blanket back in the basket. Tommy collects all of the pillows, finding it much more difficult to balance the leaning tower this go around. They do a quick survey before trudging back to Buck’s Jeep, both of them yawning without abandon as they do so.

Once on the move towards home, they twine their fingers together on the center console, choosing to drive in total silence and watch as the scenery outside flies by. It’s not uncomfortable, or claustrophobic, and for once, Buck doesn’t feel the need to fill the air with his chatter. It feels like it’s been forever since silence has felt so… Natural.

Buck  pulls into Tommy’s driveway and before the car is even in Park, Tommy says, “Stay?” With a hopeful look on his face. Buck doesn’t even have to think twice before agreeing. He can never get enough time with this man. He’d spend every second not at work with him if he could.

They leave everything but themselves in the car, dragging their tired bodies inside where they shed clothing every step along the way to Tommy’s bed. By the time they’ve crawled under the covers, they’re both in nothing but their boxer briefs. Wordlessly, Tommy pulls Buck into the little spoon again and rests his forehead against the base of his neck. Oh so quietly he requests, voice hesitant, “Say it again?”

Buck doesn’t have to ask what he means. “I love you, Thomas Kinard. More than I can express with words.” Buck cranes his neck and kisses his boyfriend as best he can before settling back in, sighing as he eyes slide close and the world around him begins to fade. Tonight was amazing, more than he ever could’ve asked for, and they’ve now both said it. The words are out there, and his heart flutters each time he replays it in his mind.

Just as his breath begins to even out, heaving out a long exhale, he feels Tommy’s lips against his neck, more than hears him, mouthing the words, “I love you too, Evan Buckley. I’ve never loved anyone as much as you.” His heart stutters, skipping a beat, moments before he slips into sleep, feeling warmer, and more cared for, than he has in years.

And he knows, in the deepest part of his soul, that Tommy Kinard feels exactly the same.