Chapter Text
Play Phineas and Ferb Theme Song
The wind blows multiple calendar pages into the air, starting on June 3.
There's 104 days of Summer Vacation
Then School comes along just to end it
Phineas and Ferb sit under a tree in their backyard.
So the annual problem for our generation
Is finding a good way to spend it
Cue montage of the boys doing multiple activities.
Like maybe
First, the boys land on the moon. They jump out of the rocket and float forwards.
Second, Phineas climbs on top of Ferb. They try to fight a mummy.
Third, they climb up a certain French tower.
Building a rocket or fighting a mummy
Or climbing up the Eiffel Tower
Fourth, Ferb removed a tarp to show a weird unicorn-turtle hybrid. Phineas takes a picture of it.
Fifth, the boys force a monkey into the shower. Neither of them enjoy this one.
Discovering something that doesn't exist
Or giving a monkey a shower
Sixth, they surf on a large wave.
Seventh, they create tiny robots.
Eighth, they find Frankenstein's monster. The brain is missing from the head. It doesn't take them that long to find.
Ninth, they find a bird.
Tenth, they fly on a helicopter with a large paintbrush over the city. They covered the city in orange paint.
Eleventh, the boys work on a painting. The painting depicts a red-headed girl with a mustache.
Surfing tidal waves, creating nanobots, or locating Frankenstein's brain
Finding a dodo bird, painting a continent, or driving your sister insane
Turns out, this girl isn't actually a painting, but the boys' sister, Candace. She turns to Phineas angrily.
"Phineas!" she shouts.
The boys do multiple things, all the while their sister watches angrily.
Film a movie.
Build a giant robot dog.
Tamper with a car.
Ride a rollercoaster.
As you can see, there's a whole lot of stuff to do before School starts this fall
Candace talks to a friend on the phone. She doesn't notice the boys carrying a live elephant into the backyard until she hears Phineas call out, "Come on, Perry!" That gets her attention.
Later, she's seen playing "Whack-a-Pest". The pests that pop out are her brothers and their pet platypus.
So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all
Afterwards, the boys dance around and play guitar as images of the infinite possibilities flash by.
So stick with us, 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all
When the boys are done, they pose. Their sister comes in.
"Mom, Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence!" she shouts.
The boys stare at her for a second. They then brush it off and resume their poses.
End Intro
104 Days of Summer Vacation
Day 87
Operation Crumb Cake
Isabella was visiting her nana at the Senior Lodge.
"Thanks for showing me your old scrapbooks, Nana," she thanked. "I love hearing about the old days. Tell me again about string art, and what it was like to get up and manually change the channel on the TV."
"That's so sweet, honey," said one of the other seniors. "Look how old-fashioned I still am. I'm writing letters by hand."
"Why not call or text?" Isabella wondered.
"You kids know nothing of the lost art of letter writing," Nana said. "Back when we were young, we expressed our truest feelings through letters."
"Yeah," the other woman agreed. "You can express how you feel about someone without worrying about getting interrupted, or losing your nerve."
"Or hiccupping. That was my problem. When I was young, I had a crush on a certain boy and I wrote a letter telling him how I truly felt. That boy ended up being your grandfather."
Isabella's excitement bubbled. "Wow. I've been trying to tell someone how I feel about them for a long time now."
"Really?" the other woman asked as she handed Isabella a sheet of paper. "I got extra paper."
"Take your time," Nana advised. "Deeply search your feelings and express your…"
But Isabella was already finished. "I've been scripting this thing out in my head for years."
"Perfect timing, the postman's here."
Isabella put her letter in an envelope and sealed it shut. She gave the letter to the postman.
"So, Nana, when Grandpa got your letter, did he come running into you and sweeping into your arms?" she asked Nana once the postman left.
"Oh, I never mailed it," Nana revealed. "I'm not brave like you. I mean, what if he had laughed at me or showed it to his friends? That would be embarrassing."
Isabella started to see visions of that exact scenario. "Oh boy."
"Hon, why do you have all these boxes of take-out food thingies?" Linda asked Lawrence in the garage.
"It's a waste to get rid of them," Lawrence explained. "I mean, look at this."
He showed a packet of Ponzu sauce on chopsticks, with a fortune cookie on the back.
"Well, now I'm hungry," said Linda.
"Then let's get some food," Lawrence said once Phineas, Ferb, and their friends came in. "Would you kids like to come along?"
"No thanks, Dad," said Phineas. "We had fusion for breakfast."
"Alright, then. I'll clear these out later. Bye, boys."
With that, Linda and Lawrence were gone.
"Hey Ferb," Phineas decided. "Let's do Dad a favor and clear these drawers and boxes out for him."
Ferb showed Phineas a certain utensil.
"Wow," Phineas admired. "It looks like a fork and a spoon combined. What would you call that?"
"In the UK, they call it a 'foon'," said Ferb.
"It's a perfect fusion of aesthetic and utility. It's like a little work of art. Ferb I know what we're…"
Before he could even finish that statement, Candace came in.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"We're clearing Dad's stuff," Phineas replied.
"You're doing a chore? No way are you getting the parent points. I'm gonna do chores too. Carry on."
Candace went out as quickly as she came in.
"You know, the drawer in my kitchen is full of ketchup and gravy," Baljeet mentioned.
"Mine has red pepper flakes and little tubs of grated cheese," Buford added.
"And mine has a honey-mustard mixture."
"Well, go home and grab it, guys," said Phineas. "We're gonna make some art. Hey, where's Perry?"
Perry got into his lair through the sprinkler pipes.
"Agent P, it seems that Doofenshmirtz is into astrology now," Monogram explained. "And that makes him very dangerous to us. I know what you're thinking. Like you, I once thought horoscopes were a bunch of hooey, but then I read my own horoscope. I'm a Sagittarius. It said, 'it's a bad day to get a haircut'. How spooky is that? I had my hair cut yesterday. Today would be a bad day. How did they know that stuff?"
Perry raised an eyebrow in confusion.
"If Doof figured out the astrological signs of our agents," Monogram said, getting back on topic. "He could predict our every move."
"I think horoscopes are meant for entertainment, and not to be taken as fact," Carl butted in.
"Of course you'd think that. You're a Capricorn." Monogram turned back to Perry. "You know what to do, Agent P."
Perry ejected out of his chair and flew out of the lair.
Oh come on, Isabella, Isabella tried to reassure herself. What's so bad about writing a letter and expressing my feelings? Feelings are natural. Phineas is natural. We are both natural beings in the world, with feelings… She then stopped when she remembered what exactly she wrote in the letter. Did I call him 'my little crumb cake'? Who does that?
She grabbed her phone and dialed her troop.
"Come in, Fireside Girls," she said aloud.
"Go ahead, chief," the girls answered.
"I just mailed a letter stating my true feelings for Phineas, and we need to stop it before he reads it. This mission is top priority. I call it 'Operation Crumb Cake'."
"'Crumb Cake'?" Ginger asked teasingly. "Is that what you called him?"
The other girls laughed.
Isabella sighed. "It's worse than I thought."
Django arrived with his box of things. He saw the model the boys were making with the packets and sporks.
"Wow, artsy," he smiled.
"Yeah," Phineas agreed. "Who knew that making an art piece out of old take-out stuff would be so fun?"
"It's almost like Tadashi Kawamata's massive chair sculpture in Abu Dhabi."
"Or the Caldera in Salzburg, Austria," Ferb added.
"That's a thing?" Django asked.
"Yeah. Look it up."
Django looked it up and was amazed to know that Ferb was right. "Wow."
Ferb looked away to hide his small grin. "What can I say? I'm a bit of an artist myself."
Django pecked Ferb on the cheek. Ferb blushed.
Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated
Perry burst through the door to see Doof working at a desk.
"Oh, hey, Perry the Platypus," Doof greeted, unfazed. "Could you be a sport and shut the door? It gets drafty in here. Give it a good slam, it sticks."
Perry slammed the door shut. A dream catcher fell from on top of the door and trapped Perry.
"Ha," Doof laughed. "Bet you never dreamt you'd get caught on a dream catcher. Norm made that this morning. Who knew he was so crafty?"
Wait, a robot made this? Perry thought to himself. That's impossible.
"Anyway, my astrologer believes that when Mercury is in retrograde, anything can go wrong and usually does. You know, she's always right, has dark hair and bangs. Anyway, as it turns out, Mercury has been in retrograde all summer. No wonder my evil schemes keep failing. That is why I invented the Unretrogradinator to reverse my bad luck. I know 'unretrograde' is a double negative, sounds like I'm making Mercury go forwards, but I'm sending it backwards from going backwards. I know, it's basically a 'Reversinator', but 'Unretrogradinator' sounds more astrology-esque. Here, I'll show you how it works. Oh, Norm?"
"I'm almost done cleaning up your mid-morning pinata, sir," Norm replied right as he finished sweeping the remnants into a dustpan.
"Yeah yeah, just stand right there."
"Okey-dokey."
Doof struck Norm with the inator. Norm dumped the pinata pieces in the dustpan back onto the floor.
"It works!" Doof cheered.
Play "I Need My Letter Back"
Isabella skateboarded after the mailman.
Isabella:
Postmaster general, please help me out
I wrote a boy a letter, now I'm filled with doubt
Adyson popped out of a mailbox, Katie appeared from behind a pole, and Milly slid down said pole. They both joined Isabella.
It was a sentimental notion
To spell out my emotion that way
Gretchen climbed down from the roof of a nearby building. Ginger jumped out of the dumpster. Holly came out of the cardboard box next to it.
Before I have a heart attack
I need my letter back
The girls reached the post office. They launched their skateboard off a ramp and hit the wall. Their skateboards created a set of stairs, so they all climbed onto the roof one by one.
I need a retraction, a full-scale rejection
At least if I could edit it and soften the tone
The girls entered the office and looked around for the letter. Adyson found the pink envelope on a conveyor belt and tried to grab it. She got sucked into a tube.
Please, just believe it, I have to retrieve it
Don't say my opportunity has already flown
Adyson ended up stuck in a sack full of letters, none of them being Isabella's. She was dumped in a silo and placed on another belt separate from Isabella's letter.
Oh, why did I ever sign my name?
I don't want to be forever stamped in shame
I'd have to move to Belgium and wear a really bad toupee
So before I have a heart attack
Troop:
She needs her letter back
Isabella saw the letter get taken by a mail person and put in another sack.
Isabella:
It could be in this very stash
Troop:
She needs her letter back
Isabella:
It's hard to overstate this fact
I need my letter back
End "I Need My Letter Back"
The girls were too late. The mail person put the sack in a truck and drove off.
"We'll never catch them this way," Isabella realized. "But we will get that letter back, no matter how politely we have to ask. We can cut them off at Phineas' house. Let's go!"
The girls headed to Phineas' place.
"Now, I'm gonna dirty the dishes," Norm declared.
"Yeah, yeah," Doof waved off before noticing something in the newspaper. "Perry the Platypus, take a look at this. 'Someone is secretly speaking on your behalf.' It sounds positive for me, but who would… wait, Perry the Platypus, was it you?"
Then Norm un-made his own dream catcher. Perry took the moment to strike.
The Fireside Girls reached Phineas' house.
"We've arrived just in time," said Isabella. "The mail isn't here yet. Okay, girls, let's seal up this area. Holly, you go take up a scanning position one half-click to the north. Ginger, you got the south. The rest of you, fan out. We've got to intercept that letter. I'm going in the back to keep Phineas distracted. Any questions."
"Yeah," said Gretchen. "How long has that mailbox been here?"
Isabella groaned and headed to the backyard without answering the question.
Norm tried to un-brush his teeth before he realized he doesn't have teeth.
"Sir," he told Doof. "The effects of the ray have worn off."
"Good for you," said Doof. "Now, can you get this platypus off me?"
Norm tried to grab Perry, but Perry jumped out of the way.
Isabella entered the backyard.
"Heya," she greeted, laughing nervously. "So, whatcha doin'?"
"What do you think?" asked Phineas. "The world's largest art piece, made entirely out of take-out food packets and utensils."
"Wow, artsy."
"Right? Can I show you around?"
"Sure."
Phineas gestured to one part of the art piece. "Here, Baljeet thoughtfully recreated Gainsborough's 'The Blue Boy' completely in red pepper flakes."
Baljeet turned around to reveal bloodshot eyes.
"I wish I would have thoughtfully created an eyewash station," he said.
Phineas led Isabella away from the horrific site and up a ladder.
"Watch your step up the chopstick ladder," he said. "From here, you can see the whole neighborhood."
He wasn't kidding. Isabella saw everyone and everything in the neighborhood, including the mail person carrying her letter.
"Uh, let's switch places," she said urgently. "The light catches the foons so beautifully from this angle."
That's when Ferb whistled at Phineas. Phineas looked up to see Ferb holding a sign with an envelope on it.
"Awesome, the mail's here," he realized as he started climbing down. "Wonder if that comic book I ordered arrived?"
"Phineas, wait!" Isabella begged.
Ginger, Katie, and Milly got in front of the mail person right as they were about to mail the letter.
"Excuse me," Ginger said, holding up one of her many patches. "But do you have a letter in your bag addressed to Phineas Flynn?"
The person skimmed through their bag until they found the letter. "Looks like I do."
"We ask you to hand it over to us, please."
"I'm sorry, but it is unlawful for a postal carrier to deliver any envelope or parcel to anyone except the intended recipient, as indicated in the address column of said envelope or parcel."
"What about afterwards?" asked Holly. "Can we jump him and wrestle it out of his hands?"
"Honey, what you do with your afternoon is none of my business," the mail person replied.
That's when Phineas came out.
"Hey, Mx. Ferguson," he greeted. "Did my comic book arrive today?"
"Nope," the mail person, Ferguson, replied. "Just this letter."
Phineas took the letter and opened it. The moment he saw Isabella's name, he smiled and fought the urge to shout in excitement.
Here it is, Isabella thought to herself. He's finally gonna know how you feel. At least you told the truth and spoke from your heart.
Perry pulled a lever on the inator. It spun around and hit Norm in the head.
Norm collapsed and hit the inator. A beam fired.
"'Dear Phineas,'" Phineas read aloud before stopping himself. "Aw, there's a little heart."
That's when Phineas and Ferguson were struck by a beam.
Phineas put the letter back in the envelope and gave it back to Ferguson. They both went their separate ways, but they were walking backwards for some reason.
Phineas went into the backyard and took everything apart.
Perry tried to push the self-destruct button. Nothing happened.
Perry tried again. Still nothing.
Only then, did he notice the coin slot.
"Gotcha," Doof laughed. "You see, I was thinking, if I had a nickel for every time you pushed the self-destruct button, then it hit me, you wouldn't have a nickel either, because you wouldn't have any pockets."
Perry revealed he had a nickel under his hat. He inserted the nickel to the coin slot and pushed the button, blowing up the inator.
"Curse you, Perry the Platypus!" Doof yelled as Perry parachuted away.
Django sadly stared at the remains of the big art piece.
"What are you sad about?" asked Buford. "It was going to happen in some way."
That stung Django hard.
Ferb and Baljeet gave Buford disapproving glares.
"What?" Buford asked. "I'm just stating facts."
"But it was still insensitive," Baljeet argued. "How did you feel when he and the others did not care about Biff?"
Buford considered Baljeet's reasoning and felt bad. "That's a good point."
Ferb approached Django and hugged him. Django was surprised at first, but he was grateful. He leaned towards Ferb and hugged him back.